#also I'll start tagging all this bleach-posting

[allramnostorage]

you know what i think bleach just really encapsulates what it's like to be 15 and i don't feel like elaborating

[beamiesbuddies]

Part 2: A Dream of an Autumn Garden

A few more photos of Mr. Morpheus, continuing from my post here!

As I said on the other photoset, I'm very happy & proud of him! I'm happy I decided to take my time to get him just how I wanted & edit the photos I took nicely. I hope you all love him too. Sweet dreams~

I have included a bunch of Cool Facts about how I made him under the cut if you are so inclined!

Started: Late Jan 2022 / Finished: Dec 30 2022

Approx work hours- 273 hours (worked on average every 3rd day out of 274 days; averaged 3h/session)

Times I remade something because I messed it up/wasn't happy with it: Hands- 2; Feet- 2; Head- 2.5; Body- 1; Clothes: 3

Pattern: trial, error & determination

Height: 3ft tall

Materials:

stretch jersey knit (body)

polyfill (stuffing)

brushed out acrylic yarn (hair)

star sapphire x2 (eyes)

pipe cleaner (hand armature)

wooden dowels/18 gauge wire (elbow/arm skeleton that keeps snapping I may add)

acrylic paint/pastels (shading & details)

acrylic thread (body sculpting & upper eyelashes)

stretch velvet/velvet burnout, cotton (clothes)

Fun facts:

his look was inspired by his overall appearance in the comics; I particularily like the depictions done by Jill Thompson, Mike Dringenberg & Marc Hempel!

his arms and legs are jointed in the same way as many teddy bears are: you use a washer, nut & bolt to butt-up the limb against the body internally and it gives the limbs full rotation. First time I have tried the method and it's definitely something I'll try again!

I had no idea how I was going to do the inset eyes, but I was determined to have them as some sort of stone. I had to redo his first head completely because I cut too far in! Eventually I got it to work by creating a "backcushion" with clay for the stones, and then closed and sculpted the eyelids overtop to secure them in.

You can't see in most of my photos but his eyes are star sapphire: when light hits them correctly, it causes a ✨to appear just like his eyes in the comics~!

making his hand & feet were a challenge, especially thinking about where to put the needle through to sculpt tendons, nails, etc (and also deciding how detailed to get without looking strange). I think I learned a lot tho and I'm very proud of the hands

my favorite sculpted parts are the collar bone/chest, the right hand & the nose~

because the skin is white, he gets very dirty with his black clothes, so I had to line all of them in white. He also has to soak in bleach once in a while to maintain his complexion (LOL)

A signature somehwere on his person xD

Thank you all again for your nice tags & comments so far on my work. If you guys would like for me to share some behind the scenes photos of this photoshoot, or WIP photos of me making him, let me know and if there's enough interest maybe I'll make a post down the road!

[eldesperadont]

hello and welcome to the start of my rough Despe/Hiromu recap essay! I'll go over their history in relation to one another. A big reason for this recap is to explain my fascination with the 10+ year long history of these characters, and why I, a queer person, is so drawn to it — this post will include links, spoilers and cover the first 9 years of their careers. If you have corrections or additional infos pls DM me!!

egg, (2010-2012)

Hiromu Takahashi and El Desperado started their pro wrestling training around the same time in NJPWs dojo – both passing NJPW's entry exam in 2009 and training for roughly a year till they officially debuted in 2010.

Desperado in March under his real name, Mikami Kyōsuke, and Hiromu later in August. And here we already have some key moments:

Takahashi's professional debut was a singles match against Mikami. (its on YouTube btw)

Despe's first ever singles victory was defeating Hiromu in said debut match.

Mikami is older and ahead of Takahashi, going on to have an impressive winning record over Hiromu, who only managed to get a sole victory over Despe during their time together as students. (two if you count in a dark match)

Hiromu genuinely struggled a lot as a Young Lion (dojo trainee), having been close to giving up on wrestling if it weren’t for main roster wrestler Tetsuya Naito, who took him under his wing.

So yeah starting off Despe had the upper hand.

This part of their career is the hardest to research given that 1.) the language barrier was way higher a decade ago, 2.) there straight up is barely any footage. So instead, I want to explain the emotional importance of the NJPW dojo background:

The time as Young Lions in NJPW is kayfabe canon. These guys are rivals but also teammates, live and train together, fight with/and each other, cheer each other on in their bouts with the seniors, carry each other to the back when they once again got beaten – these guys are close, they have to, it's them against the world.

And that is the case for pretty much all the homegrown NJPW talent. This system provides feuds with an emotional core; why would someone who was that close be so cruel to each other now? What turns brothers, best friends, partners into enemies? So much room for juicy rivalries with a real weight behind it, after all we watched these guys grow and learn, saw their highs and lows.

Also on a less serious note it's simply amusing to watch old stuff and see two guys that will be bitter rivals, who’s matches will get praise and awards - tag together in mostly fruitless efforts, stumble behind the curtain together and be so clueless about all the greatness they’ll achieve one day thanks to each others hard work.

Young Lions my beloved <3

oceans apart, (2012-2016)

As is custom with most Young Lions both went on excursion: Mikami graduating first, in 2012, and working in Mexico for a year as "Namajague" - Hiromu leaving Japan the year Desperado debuts on the New Japan main roster, in 2014, touring in Mexico and the US as "Kamaitachi" till August 2016.

Both worked in CMLL as heels, as is custom for foreign trainees, starting as masked wrestlers, loosing them in a stipulation match, and also getting their hair shaved at some point.

Here you have unmasked Namajague, who went on to rock a half facepaint look and had half of his hair bleached (in 2014, a trendsetter)

and here you got a young unmasked Kamaitachi (yes he was in a team with Christopher Daniels and Frankie Kazarian in RoH)

These are the years Mikami and Hiromu don’t interact in canon, but in an 2020 interview Desperado confessed that he kept an eye on Takahashi during the latter's excursion, cause of his success in Middle/North America and spectacular matches with Dragon Lee.

Love confessions, (May - June 2018)

Their rivalry was fully rekindled in the “Best of the Super Juniors 25” tournament, so let’s set the scene:

Takahashi’s successful: having won the most important championship for their weight division in his first year on the main roster. He’s beloved by fans and critics and a valuable member of his mentor's faction, Los Ingobernables de Japon.

El Desperado is struggling: unsuccessfully having fought for singles titles several times in the last couple of years. His only championship victories so far having been in the tag division, after joining Suzuki-gun, a shady group that tolerates him, but not without hurdles. The masked man debuted in 2013 as a cheerful honourable guy, but by now he was just a bitter, sinister bastard.

They will have their first singles meeting in 6 years, and their first on the main roster.

They are winking and nodding towards the fact that Desperado already has several wins over the younger guy, but do not address who Despy really is - officially Mikami Kyōsuke hasn’t wrestled in New Japan ever since he left for Mexico.

Leading up to the BOSJ Hiromu made a booklet in which he describes all of his possible opponents, Desperado's page is kept blank at first, but later Takahashi adds “I know who you are, and I hate you.”

Despy wants to impress Hiromu. He was one half of the IWGP Jr. Tag champs at that point and took both belts with him to the ring - he's also wearing a special mask, that is mostly white, a colour Japanese wrestlers tend to only wear on special occasions/in big matches.

A lot has changed since they last fought 1 on 1 - except one thing: Hiromu cannot beat Desperado.

Both didn’t shy away from using dirty tricks, but in the end Despy has the upper hand once more. As his opponent lays defeated in the ring the masked menace has this to say:

(postmatch promo) (the match)

Hiromu will go on to win the tournament and IWGP Jr. Heavyweight belt from Will Ospreay at the 2018 Dominion show, but the loss to his fellow former Young Lion means that the latter has the right to challenge him, and so he does, in this now infamous promo.

please watch the whole thing: link

(funfact, this happened the same night Kenny won the IWGP Heavyweight Title with Ibushi in his corner, the gays were EATING that day, in pride month no less)

Leading up to their confrontation Hiromu would post a video on his twitter playing the 'love me/not' flower game, landing on "he loves me" - which promptly makes him eat the flower in frustration

On the day of their match, June 18 2018, he brings Desperado a present:

A bouquet in a guitar case, a cruel call back to Desperados main roster debut back in early 2014: after Kota Ibushi won the IWGP Jr. Heavyweight belt at Wrestle Kingdom 8 a masked stranger approached the ring with a guitar case, revealing it to carry a bouquet of black roses for the freshly crowned champ (who was a lil confused by the whole situation)

It was the start of Despes unsuccessful run as a face and partnership with Ibushi (which you can read as the first man he tried to pursue).

The masked lad wasn't that fond of Hiromu bringing back old memories.

Their match is an all out war, both using underhanded tactics to keep the other one down, including Hiromu unmasking Despy, who shockingly doesn’t care at all - which is a huge deal, I'm going to quote Japanese NJPW commentator Milano here because he said it best:

“To a masked wrestler that’s your identity. It’s everything. But Desperado has it ripped off and then just puts it on like he was fixing his necktie. He was saying that this very essence of himself wasn’t as important as Hiromu or the belt." (translation by Chris Charlton)

But in the end Hiromu is victorious, finally ending his losing streak. After the match he has some interesting things to say:

(postmatch promo) (the match)

Life’s a b*tch. (mid 2018 - late 2019)

Hiromu's next title defence is in August 2018 in the USA against Dragon Lee, a match I still haven't been able to watch and probably never will. Due to a messed up move from his opponent, Hiromu lands hard on his neck, breaking it in the process. He somehow managed to finish the match but collapsed backstage, immediately being rushed to a hospital.

In the documentary RED HEADED REVIVAL Hiromu shared that he knew right away that something was wrong – he saw his life flash before his eyes and feared that this is the end of his career, but he decided against stopping the fight:

It took Hiromu over a year to fully recover.

That wasn't the only unfortunate incident though: in spring of 2019 Desperado broke his jaw in a deathmatch against his idol Jun Kasai. The timing couldn't have been worse: the highly anticipated BOSJ Tournament for that year being just about to start. Despe had to withdraw mere days before its opening.

Neither of them would make a return till late 2019. And their next actual confrontation wouldn��t be till 2020.

It was a sad time to be a fan of either - with Hiromu we didn't know till his return if he will even be able to wrestle again. And with Despy we had to witness fans being unnecessarily rude to him, ridiculing him about doing a deathmatch in the first place, eventho the injury could have occurred in any type of match. (if I remember correctly, Desperado even deleted his twitter due to the fan backlash)

BUT I'm gonna end this post on a good note:

1.) Despy's return marked the start of a new era for him:

He wasn't gonna apologise, he broke his jaw, so what? Shit happens. He wasn't going to pretend that the situation didn't happen either tho, hell - Despe returned in a shirt covered in blood spots, making direct references to the match he got injured in. (sth he talked about in this video) And his mask? Dons a fractured jawbone now, the cracks filled in with gold - reminiscent of kintsugi, a Japanese method for repairing broken ceramics with a special lacquer mixed with gold, silver, or platinum. The philosophy behind the technique is to recognize the history of the object and to visibly incorporate the repair into the new piece instead of disguising it.

2.) Hiromu wasn't giving up on his way of life either, making a spectacular return - the best was yet to come. Individually and together/against each other.

Stay tuned for the next part, that will absolutely also take me ages to finally put out, I'm apologising in advance,, anyways thx bye!! <3 👹🐱

[yeowangies]

KINKTOBER 2024 MASTERLIST

♡ My second year of kinktober, and with a lot of characters I didn't use to write for before as well! Wish me good luck!

♡ These are obviously all smuts, some will include dark content. Everything will be tagged accordingly (and if I miss anything, let me know and I'll add the warning)

♡ Like last kinktober, some of these prompts will have some spooky themes, cause of course, it's Halloween! Some will include gore, blood and yandere characters. Everything will be tagged.

♡ The list I'm posting is subject to change. As I'm posting it now, there are only 8 prompts finished, and I started working on some others. As I wrap up some of them, they'll be added here. The order in which I post each prompt is also subject to change.

♡ I'm not doing exactly 31 prompts! I know I'm not gonna make it, so I don't even compromise to attempt it. But I'm aiming for 15 at least, hopefully 20 prompts though.

♡ I will start posting on October 1st, and depending on my own pace when it comes to writing, it might extend to the first days of November.

♡ (Sadly this kinktober is not so bloody or creepy as last year's but I'm gonna make it spooky enough anyway)

♡ Reblogs and comments are appreciated!

October 1st: Getting even - Vegeta (DBZ); Pegging.

Synopsis: Training had somehow brought you together. The pent up energy it usually left could only lead to one thing that made it easy for your relationship to flow.

October 3rd: Covenant - Sukuna (JJK); Dubcon.

Synopsis: Turning to look for its point of origin, the voice was basically lost in the darkness, and your hands shuddered in anticipation.

October 5th: Encouragement - Kenpachi (Bleach); Deepthroating & Facesitting.

Synopsis: It had been embarrassing to confess to a man like Kenpachi that you hadn’t had a lot of experience regarding sex.

October 7th: Mirror - Jiraiya (Naruto); Mirror.

Synopsis: You narrowed your eyes at him as Jiraiya went through his belongings and, surprisingly fast, pulled out a small bottle of what you knew was lube. He grinned at you like the pervert he was, and you frowned.

October 9th: Sweet disposition - Goku (DBZ); Overstimulation.

Synopsis: You had been crying the night before Goku returned from training God knows where; had you known, you would have put some tea bags on your eyes, to try and hide the puffiness and redness around them.

October 11th: Made a mess - Kugo Ginjo (Bleach); Piss Kink.

Synopsis: The way you had sneaked up on Kugo as soon as he stepped into the house had made his cock instantly hard, faster than any other time he had been hard for you.

October 13th: Only yours - Nanami Kento (JJK); Breeding.

Synopsis: Just the sight of Kento made your knees weak, mouth water, and heat to pool inside your abdomen.

October 15th: Bossy - Goku & Chichi (DBZ); Threesome.

Synopsis: You and Goku were impatient during sex, but despite what people thought of Chichi (and even the way she acted around the two of you sometimes), she was certainly the most demanding, being bossy even in bed.

October 17th: Delights - Unohana (Bleach); Impact Play.

Synopsis: You groaned, legs trembling, before you started counting every single blow again.

October 19th: Luxury - Toji (JJK); Titfucking.

Synopsis: Toji was a sleaze, but he did came home with a lot of money every once in a while, and he did indulge you in a few luxuries. 

October 21th: Mindblowing - Goku&Vegeta (DBZ); Double Penetration in Two Holes.

Synopsis: No matter how much Goku and Vegeta get you ready, it was always overwhelming when they pressed their cocks inside you.

October 23th: Perfectly shaped - Kensei (Bleach); Squirting.

Synopsis: He knew your body better than you knew yourself, he knew exactly what to say, what to do, where to touch and what to say to get you going. That’s why it was so easy for you to get close to the edge of an orgasm.

October 27th: Charm - Jiraiya (Naruto); Stripping.

Synopsis: “Come on, baby, take off your clothes for me.” You pleaded, batting your eyelashes, looking up at him with starry eyes. 

October 29th: Sweet and knowing - Broly (DBS); Masturbation and Voyeurism.

Synopsis: Broly sees you everyday from outside your window. You don’t even know you’re being watched, you just go on with your life. He was positive he’d never seen anyone more attractive.

October 31st: The end of the world - Suguru Geto (JJK); Sensory Deprivation.

Synopsis: The day was sunny, no clouds in the sky, warm, almost hot. Eerily dreamy for a late spring day. There were still some flowers in some of the plants in your front yard. A heavy contrast with the man in dark clothes, long dark hair, and even darker eyes, waiting outside your door.

November 3rd: A beast to toy with - Kenpachi (Bleach); Size Difference.

Synopsis: Every time you walked to the fourth division, you could feel it everywhere. Whenever you went back to the barracks, there he was, somewhere in the roofs of the buildings. Even when you were alone in your room, you could practically smell him; he had been there at some point while you were gone. 

November 10th: Hint of light - Raditz (DBZ); Bondage.

Synopsis: He couldn’t even remember how he fell asleep, or where he even was. For starters, he was sitting on a chair. And when he tried to move, he realized that he couldn’t. 

[seawing-vibes]

15 for the ask game?

 15. Any design headcanons?

I'll just bullet-point my thoughts for this one!!

Mudwings: Nothing really <3 I imagine they'd wear the most accessories & items with them, usually local plant life or accessories gifted from siblings. Very alligator-based with crackly dried-mud-looking scale patterns.

Skywings: BIRDS <3 Feathered Skywings are my favorite. I sometimes draw them with just feathered wings, but overall feathery dragons for these guys. The ratio of scales to feathers varies, but mainly small feathers along the back, feathered wings, and scaled legs, and occasionally scaled face. Ancient skywings had fewer feathers, but modern Skywings have more and more feathers.

Icewings: The royal family & most nobles have antlered horns! They do shed, and artwork is often commissioned from the shed horns. They have false horn-headdresses they wear to official meetings when their horns are shed. Baby icewings have fibrous "fur" that goes away as they age, but many icewings still have a fluffy underbelly. Also, they're invertebrates. They are so far away from all the other tribes on the cladogram. Ancient Icewings don't look much different than modern Icewings. Hemocyanin in their copper-rich blood-looking ass. you can find more rambling about this in the tags of this post lmao

Seawing: You can see my notes on them here!

Rainwings: They have prehensile tails & can have multiple frills! There are two types of Rainwing, python-like ones with pit organs and no outer ear, and then the more bird-like guys with external ears & beaks who have advanced vocal cords to imitate sounds better! Other then that nothing really significant.

Sandwings: Hooded Sandwings my beloved! Give them hoods! If my fellow Wings of Fire Amino survivors remember the drama 'round this, I'm sorry. But I think there are some Sandwings with hoods & some with frills! But that's p much it

Nightwings: My favorite headcanons! Their wings reflect the night sky at their date of birth, and the longer they spend under the night sky, the more star-like scales appear on them! Old Nightwings often have near-white backs & shoulders due to exposure to the stars, like almost but not really sun bleaching.

sorry pantalans no headcanons for you :( gotta study bugs more before I feel confident enough to start developing designs for yall

[wind-becomes-lightning]

Bye to Wind and Lightning

TLDR: I AM WHINY AND IM GOING TO MOVE BLOGS TO A SMALLER ONE WHERE NOBODY KNOWS ME. EITHER @kikuneesama FOR GENERAL STUFF OR @konohamaru-sensei FOR ANIME STUFF.

Did you know that in 2020 when the pandemic held us all in a chokehold I decided to reread One Piece and Bleach, but consciously decided not to touch Naruto, as if I knew that I'd be sucked in real bad if I read it again? I was right. In 2021, I randomly thought "No, I will read it now" and then I did and boom I talked about nothing else for that summer and to channel my thoughts I made this blog right here separate from my main and not as a sideblog. I wanted to start completely over at a different place.

I had a terrible summer in 2021, constant mental breakdown. I don't want to bore you with the details because you don't care, but just being back doing the stuff I loved when I was 16 was such a blessing. I was truly happy in the first months here, especially with the discord servers and the oc talk and the friends I made. My boyfriend commented on it all the time, that I looked so very happy. And I was! But these things never stay.

The problem with me is, I want community, I want to talk headcanons and to bitch about characters I don't like and promote ships I love and cry and laugh and hug all of you for liking the same things as me and at the same time I'm terrified of rejection, of people hating me, of people spreading lies behind my back. I guess school does traumatise you in some way.

I can't survive in a cutthroat fandom like this one, I take things too personally too quickly. I don't understand that if you, a normal person with your own wishes, likes a thing I don't like or dislike a thing I like it doesn't mean you automatically hate me. You are just a different person and that is ok! It's not you. It's me. NO I'm not just saying that. It really is me.

Did you know that when I started out here I didn't tag my stuff? Especially not my OC stuff (and I still rarely tag it). The fear that someone might find it, hate on it, send me hate, make fun of it etc, sits so deep that I rather have my work not be seen at all. Yet, I need the attention to keep going because without the reblogs and likes and asks I feel like an utter failure.

My boyfriend says I am not good with the public eye on me and he is probably right. I envy those of you who can stand their ground and be self confident in their arguments. I envy those who don't care what others say, who can block and move on, who don't get a knot in their stomach when someone they had nice interactions with unfollows. I shouldn't care, but I do.

On my first tumblr blog I never looked at my followers, I never got asks either or was deep in fandom or anything, but I reblogged my stuff and posted my thoughts and was feeling good. I love tumblr, its the best social media out there for a reason. Yet, with this one, I got so self conscious about my followers, about what I can and can't say. If my presence would offend or not etc etc.

I was kinda looking forward to 1000 Followers because it is an insane number, but now at 997 I'm throwing in the towel. Isn't that like giving up before the finish line? Maybe, but I'm so tired and I want to be unknown again. I want to be nobody again. I want the naruto fandom to move on and forget I was ever here.

So I'm leaving! Sorry, I guess! At least for a good while. I might be back to finish the requests still pending on this account and then disappear again, but I don't know if I'll ever permanently come back. If you by any chance really, really really care about my presence, you can find me under @kikuneesama as a general spam blog with all sorts of things and under @konohamaru-sensei for anime-only stuff. This is also where my Naruto posting will be moving.

If you are a moot I will follow you from Kikuneesama again.

Thanks, I guess, for over two years of hanging out. I'm sorry I am such a lame loser.

One thing is for sure: Though I am moving to a blog named after Konohamaru, Kakashi will always be my love.

tschüss und auf wiedersehen, ~Nisi

PS: I'll q this a couple of times so I'm sorry if you have to see it a few times in the next few days. I swear I'll be gone after that.

[voxofthevoid]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by my one and only Jesus @eusuntgratie

I recently cleared out all the ask/tag games in my drafts because I realized I'd reached the pile-up stage of putting things in there and not doing shit. Thanks to everyone who's tagged me in those the last couple of months and sorry I didn't get to any!

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

148

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

2,005,606 (crossed the 2 million milestone recently and am still buzzing about it)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I'm only writing for Jujutsu Kaisen, but I'm posting for Jujutsu Kaisen, Bleach, and MCU.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

I was so sure it was going to be all MCU, but nope, it's a mix of MCU and Hannibal. God, that was my first Ao3 fandom, and my Hannibal fics are from 2014. It's surreal people are still reading/enjoying them.

if you're looking for jesus (then get on your knees)—MCU

i'm a ghost, you're an angel (one and the same)—MCU

A darkness seen and shared—Hannibal

Ways and Means—Hannibal

the hand you want to hold is a weapon (and you're nothing but skin)—MCU

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I enjoy the interactions and discussions. Plus, since I'm not a Discord (or group spaces) person, it's how I find fellow fans to chat with, especially during my initial foray into a particular fandom. I do have a huge backlog of some 1.1k comments from 2020 to mid-2021 because I didn't have much time for fandom in that period. I'm chipping away at it slowly, but I'm pretty prompt about replying to everything on my post-2021 fics.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmm, this Hannibal fic, I'd say: Till the bitter end

Let's just say I predicted the series finale in some weird way.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of mine end happily—a few are ambiguous, while others are dark.

8. Do you get hate on fic?

Oh yeah. It's only happened with MCU and Jujutsu Kaisen, and they're mostly cases of overgrown children unhappy that I didn't write the ships or dynamics they want.

9. Do you write smut?

It's my specialty now 😎

10. Do you write crossovers?

Nah. I've done fusion-style AUs, but full-on crossovers aren't something I'd like to write. I'll read them, but I'm picky.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Multiple times (MCU and YoI, iirc), both within Ao3 and offsite.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Multiple times, for multiple fandoms! It's always a delight.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I did write one(1) fic that way, but it got yeeted into the void when my co-author deleted her entire Ao3 account. I have a copy, I think.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I'm the kind of person who's most devoted to whatever is eating my brain at the time, so right now, it's Yuuji/Gojou from Jujutsu Kaisen.

15. What’s a wip you want to finish but probably won’t?

My writing superpower is that if I lose interest in a WIP, I also lose all desire to finish it and any guilt about it. And these days, I tend to start a fic and work on just that till it's done. So the answer is—none.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I write some smokin' hot porn, and I'm pretty good at threading character study through it. The porn is the plot, in most cases. I also enjoy doing background worldbuilding that serves to give the narrative a sense of depth despite the focus being on characters and relationships.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Fight scenes, ensemble casts, and sustained plotty plots.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Ah, I can feel my Hannibal-era Google-translate Lithuanian judging me.

In general, I avoid it, but when I write for anime set in Japan, I tend to work in honorifics. My mother tongue has those too, so I know from experience that there are no English equivalents that capture the same vibe.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Hunter x Hunter, I think. That account no longer exists. On Ao3, it's Hannibal.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I tend to be biased toward my newer works, so this keeps changing. At the moment, it's (let me be clear) every version of the story ends with you being slaughtered (JJK, goyuu).

Tagging (no pressure) 20 people because why the hell not: @possibleplatypus, @actualalligator, @joeys-piano, @cursedvibes, @backwardshirt, @m34gs, @naamah-beherit, @dragongirlg-fics, @crossroadswrite, @spacebuck, @jenroses, @calamitouskings, @knivash, @lo-55, @bookwyrmling, @sorrythatwasamistake, @ddelline, @lilyfarseer, @roughkiss and @deunan306

[bots-and-cons]

I feel bad that I've been venting so frequently lately, but I don't really have anyone to talk to irl right now. Feel free not to read, but if you do, thanks

I'm feeling so damn overwhelmed. I have so many things I'm supposed to be doing, but I can't seem to get started on any of them. I really should start my swedish course, because it's the last summer course I have. I finished the other two courses last week, but I don't really feel any sense of accomplishment and it fucking sucks. There's apparently not really much to do with the swedish course, because one of my classmates got it done in under an hour, which is fucking weird, because it's a 5 credit course and one credit is supposed to be 27 hours of work. I hope it's actually that easy.

I've been having a lot of really weird and violent nightmares, which is also not fun. Also my intrusive thoughts seem to be sort of coming true in my dreams? In addition to the nightmares, my intrusive thoughts have gotten pretty bad and very violent. That has been going on for a couple of weeks now, and I just keep trying to ignore it. The intrusive thoughts just give me a lot of anxiety, and they scare me pretty bad, especially when I'm around other people. Lately it's also been pretty bad with the whole "kill yourself" thought when something goes wrong. Like I drop a spoon and my brain is immediately like, "omg you're such a failure, kill yourself". I don't understand why, because I'm not suicidal atm, not even close, I'm just stressed and overwhelmed. (I put the tw in the tags anyway though)

I hurt my foot like a month ago, probably a stress fracture or something of that sort, but it's now starting to feel better. I refused to go to the doctor about it, because a) I would have had to walk there and b) they would've most likely blamed it on my weight and hadn't actually done anything to help. I'm not saying my weight has nothing to do with it, of course it does. I'm fat, that's just a fact, but often doctors blame everything on my weight and don't look any deeper. It's fucking infuriating, because I know there's something wrong, but the only advice I get is "you should lose weight". I'm sure that would help some of the stuff that I've got, but some people treat it as some miracle cure.

I'm probably not going to do practical training at all this autumn, because I honestly don't feel like I can. I'm wondering if this whole school thing is really even worth it tbh. I don't know if I'm ever going to be able to hold down a full-time job. I would love to be able to work some day, at least part-time, but Idk how realistic that even is.

I've been able to manage school for a year and a half now, and I'm starting to feel pretty burned out. I don't know if I'll make it to next spring without having to take sick leave. I'm honestly fucking scared. I don't want to go into a depressive episode or trigger a more severe psychotic episode again. I've been having some hallucinations lately, and I'm pretty paranoid about a lot of stuff. It's not fun. One thing I've been wondering is what my psychosis actually is? My best guess would be psychotic depression, but I should probably talk about my psych nurse and psychiatrist about it.

I have a hairdresser appointment tomorrow, and I'm kinda nervous, because it's a new place, and I'm gonna have my hair dyed so it's gonna take a while. I'm not very good at spending time at places I don't know or where I haven't been before. The last time I got my hair cut was about a year ago so it's time to do it again. I want my hair shorter again and I decided I wanted to dye it purple. Probably a pretty dark purple because I don't know if I want to have my hair bleached first. Anyway, I feel a bit better having written this out, and I hope I can get an actual fic post out later this week too.

[steviewashere]

WIP Word Game!!

Rules: you will be given a word. share one sentence/excerpt from your wip(s) that start with each letter of that word.

I was tagged by @adverbally! Thank you, this game is probably my new favorite tag game. My word is: SHAPE. For this one, I'm gonna share bits and bobs from my big bang fic, "Return to Sender". It starts posting in October, but I'll post a promo a little closer to the actual posting date; too busy focused on actually tying up the loose ends of the fic itself (rewriting certain scenes to flow and also to change some key points; it is a bitch.)

—————

S -

Steve hums. Runs his thumbs over the bottom of his own glass, over the textured edges, and sighs—trying adamantly to not think about the warmth radiating from Eddie’s leg. He sobers with a steadying breath. “Every morning I have a cup of coffee with way too much vanilla creamer,” he admits quietly, “I don’t even like it. It’s just straight up disgusting. Too much sugar in the morning, but it gets me awake enough for work. So I do it anyway. Maybe because I missed it, too, after you…You know.” “Well, I’ll be back in town a while. Y��know, if you’d like to catch up.” Something in Steve pulsed painfully raw at that. He knew, of course he knew, that Eddie wasn’t going to be here forever. But something in him hoped, even the slightest bit, that they’d have all the time in the world. Like their days could freeze over and they’d still be in this diner—sipping on infinite shakes and shooting the shit like they were still barely in their twenties. But they’re well onto their fifties now. Time doesn’t wait for them anymore.

H -

He parks unceremoniously. Takes a deep breath. Eyes trailing up to Wayne’s home. The mess of miscellaneous books. An empty ashtray, a little ceramic thing, painted bright orange; something Eddie made when he was in middle school. There’s the orange sofa, old and rusting on the legs, sun-bleached. A little dark blue rocker sitting in the corner of the porch, also sun-bleached, but the fabric is matted down. His hands come off of the steering wheel, grabs the keys roughly from the ignition, and hefts himself out of the driver’s seat. Doesn’t even have to knock on the door before Wayne’s ushering him inside.

A -

And among all the things is a framed photograph. He grabs for it. It’s three people: Steve, a little girl, and a woman.

P -

“Perfect?” Steve scoffs. “You used to whine to me every time I gave you a bowl. All, ‘Ew, Stevie. I’m not a horse.’ Which, granted, you scarfed it down anyway. But still. You hated oatmeal, even if it was mine.”

E -

Eddie reaches out to try and make amends—something—but Steve stops him with a gentle hand on his chest. His thumb sweeping over where Eddie's heart is. Warmth radiating from his palm. He swallows, sniffs, and looks on with devastating, wet eyes. "Give me a couple good nights, Eds. That's all I want. Love me like you would've."

Okay, that's all you're getting out of me from my big bang until it posts. Also, none of these excerpts are in chronological order.

Tagging, no pressure:

@sidekick-hero @ataliagold @queenie-ofthe-void @scoops-aboy86 @hotluncheddie

@pearynice @werepuppy-steve @wheneverfeasible

Your word is: MAIL

[spiteslucanis]

tag game! choose some of your favourite lyrics and list them below

tagged by @ronandreams tysm dear!

i have a master doc of my fave lyrics of all time that's currently about 28 pages long so uhhh i cherry picked some absolute faves AND recent faves to put here <3 i also have a separate tag where i occasionally post about lyrics that make me particularly insane

tagging (no pressure as always) @zhalar @scarymovies @gayvampirate @miwtual @greensaplinggrace @mykinkiskarmas @daenerys-targaryen @queencalanthes @kazzsbrekker @the-maidofmischief + anyone who sees this and wants to! just say i tagged you

all time faves

new order, "true faith"

I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun

pet shop boys, "this must be the place i waited years to leave"

I'm listening to the words I thought I'd never hear again A litany of saints and other ordinary men

mika, "good guys"

If we are all in the gutter, it doesn't change who we are 'Cause some of us in the gutter are looking up at the stars

orville peck, "nothing fades like the light"

Time goes by, I wanna rise up And I know why things change And I know why I stay the same And I know everything must die But nothing fades like the light

the amazing devil, "inkpot gods" (so many TAD ones to choose from but i picked this since i have a whole ass tattoo of it)

And what you hear is not silence It's just the trees waiting to hear what next you'll hum And what you see is not the dark It's just the gods upturning ink pots 'cause they know what you'll become

camel, "west berlin"

And I'm looking out over West Berlin Feeling freer now than I've ever been When the sun sets over West Berlin I'll be leaving, I can't come back again

metteson, "second heart"

Why do I let my lips touch lips impure, like I've never seen a fire before? Why do I always have to burn before I learn how to let you go? Why do I rush to lay myself down bare, like I have a second heart to spare? Why do I always have to burn before I learn how to let you go?

and a few new/recent faves

metteson, "naturally"

It must be easy to notice It must be obvious Like a meteor coming Not some flicker of dust It must be something frightening But still a dream like the open sea Some people struck by lightning But nothing comes natural to me Nothing comes naturally

ethel cain, "sun bleached flies"

What I wouldn't give to be in Church this Sunday Listening to the choir, so heartfelt, all singing God loves you, but not enough to save you So, baby girl, good luck taking care of yourself

taylor swift, "who's afraid of little old me?"

So I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street Crash the party like a record scratch as I scream "Who's afraid of little old me?" I was tame, I was gentle 'til the circus life made me mean "Don't you worry, folks, we took out all her teeth"

depeche mode, "blasphemous rumours"

I don't want to start any blasphemous rumours But I think that God's got a sick sense of humour And when I die, I expect to find him laughing

[saetoshis]

CLOSING OUT THE YEAR!

[‹ A MUTUAL APPRECIATION POST ›]

[‹ ABOUT ›] i started this new blog in around september, and we already have over 1k followers and sooo many lovely mutuals from not only this account but my past one! and i adore you all SO MUCH, this is just me spewing my love and thoughts into one giant post 🤗 // if i forgot you PLEASE let me know and i'll add you :') i have soo many mutuals i need to keep track sobs!

[‹ EXTRAS ›] if you can, listen to the song! i just think it rlly ties into how i feel from a musical standpoint sob! im a music nerd excuse me ahksla

@kavehtion

MY SWEET VLYNN ! i not only adore your writing but also your formatting, it's so pleasing to the eye :') i find your energy soothing and bright - your confidence radiates to me and i always absolutely adore seeing you on dash! we don't interact too much but i hope we can more in the future :)

@heartnagi

LOLA LOLA LOLA BABY ! you've been here since diaphanoso snifle i adore you sooo much ! everything you post i go "that's so real" in my head, i adore your creativity and you have such a strong sense of morals which i admire :') i'm soo glad to have gotten close to u ! let's keep thirsting over aether and each other more next year ehehe

@zorotits

LINAAA even tho we are new moots i literally love ur energy on dash.. it's kinda bright and chaotic and SOO funny ! your theme actually makes me wanna take a bite out of ur acc if that makes sense jaksdla BUT i legit adore your energy (esp in tags omfg they make me die) and hope we can interact n thirst sooo much more next year :)

@touyyes

BAKI OMGFGKJF baki i stg. you make me LOSE MY MIND every time you post.. it's either making me choke from laughing so hard or actually dying from the MM M MM OH SO YUMMY thirsts ! you had me at toji n i was like i have to follow RN. BUT STOP i adore ur energy it's like bright chaos it makes me feel SOOO FULL OF GOOD ENERGY :) let's thirst over toji in jjk s2 next year :P

@dilu3

MY SWEET LALAA ! your fics literally bring me to my KNEESSS i adore the way you write especially bachira, n you're always putting me on to new chars and animes like hellsing :') i love your creativity and how you're always thinking of creative blog names n themes i adore them all !! gimme even more chars to thirst over in 2023 :)

@510hz

ARES i dont think u understand how much i adore seeing u on dash like. even the controversial posts i'm like "stop thats so real" like everything u say i agree with. the energy is like.. chaotic chill I LOVE IT it feeds my soul :') i cant wait for more moshares interactions n maybe irl eheheheh :)

@hystix

cadie dont get me started. HALAHAKAKA i literally love u like i am in love w you :') you're my bright lil light on dash n i swear when i see u in notifs im like "I CAUGHT U !" you're such a like.. precious soul to me i just wanna hug u snifle !! you remind me of warm hugs yesyes that is ur energy to me!! my sweet cadie snifle I MUST SEE U MORE ON GENSHIN N DASH NEXT YEAR :)

@tinie

ARLO ! SOGLO ! BUNLO ! omgongog you might not know but i swear u have an influence on me ! your energy is so like .. calm but attractive if that makes sense snifle ! the 'nodnodnod' n use of 'soggy' has captured me i swear ! now im always saying soggy ! but i rlly love seeing u on dash n ur like.. my biggest scara association if that makes sense ! i wanna see evennn more scarlomouche all 2023 :')

@nymphoheretic

MY BABY MY WIFE my BEAAAUTIFUL WIFE ! nymph / kk / kirei my absolute babe. my beloved since diaphanoso .. my biggest kyo n gyo n tengen thirst partner ehehe ! your energy is like omgog warm and chaotic I ADORE U ! every time i rewatch kny n see kyo im like 'yeah that's my wife's man' ehehekekej I HOPE TO THIRST OVER KNY EVENNN MORE WITH U ! one day ill finish bleach n catch up to all ur faves :)

@blueparadis

PARADIS ! omgomg i swear we haven't interacted much sobs BUT I WANNA MORE ! you give me suuuch calm sweet energy on dash :') I ALWAYS ADOREEE your formatting your brain is just like WHOAA so special so creative ! i can't wait to see more pretty colors on dash from u ehehe AND HOPEFULLY EVEN MORE INTERACTIONS IN 2023 !

@kunizk

ZENNN ZENZEN ! omg we rlly have not interacted much but stop. i adore ur navi SO MUCH I WANNA EAT IT ? like does that make sense? prob not BUTASLASAL STOP STOPP. i love ur interactions w toji's rp blog i love seeing just like. no shits given layin everything out ahaklaa BUT ! i hope to see more feral shit on dash from u AND MORE INTERACTIONS TOGETHER NEXT YEAR :)

@nymphoheratic

KATTAKSDHKAL KAT MY BABY ! my lil genshin buddy snifle ! i not only adore ur writing but i just ADORE U ! you're my lil kit kat sob :') i hope tumblr fkn unflags u someday HAKAKA it is ridiculous how much i miss u here ! but im glad i have u on genshin n hopefully we can share more lil leaks n show off tcg n showcases to each other next year ehehkeeke !

@babiefwuit

my love my light my literal best friend :') I SRSLY DONT KNOW WHAT ID DO WITHOUT YOU TO TALK TO :(:(((:(:(( nana bun HAKDAL grammy bun i miss u SOOO BAD ! WE NEED TO CATCH UP RN. like HOP ON DISC RN ! i am kissing u my sweet, soulful-energied baby! i could cry ! ahdkalsda BUT LETS MEET UP AGAIN N THIRST OVER GYOMEI AGAIN IN 2023 !

@itoshi-s

OMFGHKLASDKLAAAA ZARI STOP. bro it's been like 2 days of being mutuals but STOP I LOVE SEEING U ON DASH I LOSE MY MIND ! your energy omfg. it's irreplaceable i stg ! the feral thirsts, the thoughts u put in my tinie head ! ill go insane one day I SWEAR ADKASL im gonna bite u 24/7 in 2023 :')

@boyfrwenz

JEM MY SWEET THING ! you are my biggest daichi association ever ! every time i see anything haikyuu/daichi related im like STOP I WONDER IF JEM HAS SEEN THIS OMG ! you have like calm chaotic but also bright energy snifle ! i hope to see more daichi fics n interactions in 2023 :))

@ohsatori

omg HALEYYEHKALDSA stop stop ! i adore how you write not only tendou but all characters snifle ! your theme caught my eye so hard n im sooo glad i clicked follow sob ! you are such a sweet, bright soul on dash to me !! you also put me on SOO much good haikyuu art i adore it :') i cannot WAIT for more tendou fics n art n interactions next year :P

@haruchiyos

azrael my beloved my pretty thing ! u get me like u just GET ME yk? i feel like we're aligned or smth ! every time i interact with you im just thinking "mm m mm azrael gets it!" I MISS SEEING U ON DASH I NEED MORE AZRAEL THOUGHTS ! im yelling at yukimiya to give u sum kisses for the new year :P

@tinymaru

REINEAKJSDKLA reine my baby. I SWEAR U DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH RESPECT N ADMIRATION I HAVE FOR UR TALENT ! you're such a sweet soul too i can't help but smile when i see "MOSHI" randomly in my disc notifs asdklalad !! you have such a gifted, creative, beautiful mind to me ! i cannot wait for more art n selfship drawings n silly lil dms in 2023 :)

@sailewhoremoon

SOSAAAA every time i see u on dash legit love sosa plays in my head ! your energy omfg it cannot be replicated. it's SOOOO GOOD and the way u reblog asks n check up on ur moots is SOO SWEET ILL CRY ! youre the sweetest brightest lil light on this app :') I NEED MORE FERAL UNCENSORED SOSA THOUGHTS ASAP ! i hope to see evennn more next year eheeheke

@dearbraus

FAWN FAWN FAWN BABY ! i adore ur acc sm omfgklf i also LOVE that u post abt lesbian culture n ur lil thoughts on genshin women esp lisa ! you're such a strong presence n it's sooo like... energetically warm to me !! i just adore seeing ur reblogs n thoughts spewed out on dash ! i hope we can interact EVEN MORE IN 2023 ! kisskiss to u :)

@thetempleofnyx

omg jen ASKALLAAAA my baby my baby omg ! my sweet thing i treasure you SO MUCH ! your feral unhinged uncensored thoughts on dash r sooo sooo contagious i stg ! every time i see u horny post im like oh. OH OHHH oh. OHH yeah oh right oh! HAKHSA but i srsly love ur sweet n caring energy you are one of the just most.. precious people ive met here ! i hope for more thirsts n interactions n LOVE with you next year !

@eremikan

MARI. i see like everything u put out on dash n i think to myself "thats so real" like ur brain is sooo intriguing to me.. IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT ! you have like neutral chaotic energy and im always like "i wanna peek in ur brain even more" ! but i will legit NEVER forget that satosugu fic you wrote where getou was gone and it was reader + satoru and getou like came to them in a dream sorta situation?? OMG THAT FIC CHANGED MY LIFE it was my first time reading an angsty fic ahdkala but i LOVED IT ! but anyways that was long omgomg i cant wait to see more peeks of ur brain this next year :P

@festive

VIVA VIVAAAA your energy on dash actually makes me smileomgomg i think to myself "viva n cyno" all the time like u are sooo associated with him in my brain ! i love love LOVE your writing style sm, n the cyno content is TOP tier to me ! youre so funny your energy is just so bright to me ! but i hope to see even moreee viva n cyno next year n hopefully even more interactions ! :)

@sugies

MY BABY JUJU ! omgomg every time i see jjk or getou art im like "WAIT HAS JUJU SEEN THIS?" you're like the sweetest lil bean to me ! i adoreeee adore you n MISS U ! WE NEED TO GET BACK INTO JJK ANALYSIS AGAIN ! i miss talking abt the chapters w you ! i am giving u a warm squishy hug rn cuz i miss u soooo much ! i hope for more jjk/getou brainrot n thirsts in 2023 :)

@rczc

ZEHR MY LOVE MY LIGHT MY BABY ! i miss you SOOO MUCH STOP ! you are the fkn funniest person on this app i am SOO SERIOUS ! your energy is so warm and chaotic and the feral unhinged tags FEED MY SOUL ! you make me choke from laughing so hard i will cry ! i miss u zehr bear ! i am hugging u virtually :)

@milkyybuns

OMGOGM DAE ! my tengen brainrot buddie ehehehe every time i see itto or tengen art/fics im like stop it rn where is dae ! im falling back into my tengen phase again so expect a lot in ur inbox ehehhe ... you have such sweet energy on dash like seeing u in my inbox makes me SMILE SO HARD ! i adore u baby n i hope for amazing things AND SOME MORE TENNIE BRAINROT NEXT YEAR !

@sugr

KELS KELS ! u feed me soooo well with the jjk art reblogs n haikyuu / jjk fics ! i will die adkasladh you have calm n bright energy to me ! i associate u sooo hard with yuuji (prob from the prev. username hehe) ! but you remind me of the feeling of hot coffee on a cold day if that makes sense.. like soothing n cozy :') I CANT WAIT FOR MORE FICS N INTERACTIONS THIS NEXT YEAR ! kisskiss for u kels !

@munsonsins

ABBYYADHJADKAD stop i miss u so much ! even tho i dont know shit about marvel or that stuff?? i will always read anything u write cuz i ADOREEE IT SM ! whenever i see u pop into my inbox w a lil meme i smile soo hard eeek ! i hope school is treating u well n ur doing AMAZING ! n if not i hope that next year brings u the amazing vibes that you deserve :) i love u abby ehekeke

@ghxstic

NYMPH NYMPH my kny food distributor ehehekee i stg my fav muzan fic is that muzan + koku fic u wrote from WAAAY back when ! i miss u sosososo much ! i hope life is treating u well ! i miss interacting so bad ahakalaa !! im giving u 365 kisses so every day of next year is a good one :)

@pcwer

bruh omg xel i literally think u are the funniest person i have ever met in my entire life HAKAKAKAAA like. i genuinely lose my shit every time u post ESP ABT KISHIBE ILL DIE RN THINKING ABT IT ! but you have such warm n happy energy it makes my soul feel soooo full ! i cant wait for more WEIRD kishibe thoughts n yummy thirsts next year :P

@r-oronoa

OMGOMG APOLLO my baby pollo ! i am sooo glad to have u as a mutual stop omgog ! you have like omg. the most precious energy ive ever felt thru a screen HASKDAAA you're so warm and inviting and bright it makes me feel right at home !! your fics are so amazing and the way u push out content is so admirable ! i adore u and i hope for even moreee interactions in 2023 :')

@suyacho

SNOW OMFAKSDJKALAAA you and xel are like.. the most ridiculously hysterical duo ive ever experienced in my life ! interacting w you guys on diaphanoso was INSANE i loved the kny brainrot sm ! you're the sweetest little precious soul ive ever met ! ill cry thinking abt it omgoggn i love playing genshin w you and teaching u all kinds of things ! i cant wait to play n interact even more !!!

@saneminx

CHERRY MY BELOVED MI BEBECITA ! MI CORAZON ! i love your energy so much like your sense of justice and bright, loud + confident personality makes me feel SOO GOOD i admire u a lot ! you always feed me with sooo many kny thirsts i ADORE U ! i am hugging u soooososo tight and i hope 2023 is AMAZING FOR U !

@the-witch-of-one-piece

VAL OMGLAKSDAAAA VAL VAL ! i see u writing bleach i promise one day ill watch it all n catch up with you :') your energy is so positive and loving, i can feel it through the screen i swear ! you make me feel right at home, and i love that we've stayed mutuals through my blog switch and after around a year ! im sending all my good energy to you for this next year :'))

@getoswhore

BRUH AHKLAAAA BELLA GTFO i love you. everything u put out on dash makes me fucking DIE LAUGHING STOP ! youre like one of my most precious mutuals from diaphanoso omgogm you've influenced me to be more confident n loud on dash hhehehee I ADORE U ! i cannot wait for more belloshi interactions n thirsts in 2023 :)

@donvampiro

DONDONDON I WILL CRY RN ! you are soo close to my heart my beloved ! if i could speak french id put a cute little french term of endearment but alas i am. not there yet :') snifle you make me feel SOOO safe and warm. i adore your heart and your preciousness it makes me emotionalahdkaaaa but i cannot wait for more don + moshi time this next year :')

@sleepy3

SLEEPY SLEEPS MY BABY ! you make me smile so hard when i see u in my inbox, you're always putting me onto new chars and it has me GASPINGAJSKAA i love your energy it's soft, like a warm hug and sleepy cuddles !! i cannot wait for more interactions n PLSPLSSS gimme some more chars to thirst over with you next yearhehehe

@tsunderedoctor

PURPLE my baby my love ! my mutual since diaphanoso ! i adore your sensitivity and brightness, youre such a precious person to me and i just genuinely admire your soul ! i loveee the law art reblogs you put out, they feed me sooo well :') and your emergency requests i adore so much! you are such a beautiful person to me ! ill cry omgogm ! but i hope the new year brings you nothing but good things ! you deserve it all :))

@4izawas

NEPPY NEP ! my bf since diaphanoso :') i adore your bright n confident energy SO MUCH ! your big biggg heart makes me soo so easily comfy and happy with you !! you have so much confidence and i swear it's contagious :) i cant wait for more genshin + moshtune interactions this next year ! i am sending u all my thirsty n positive energy !!

@garoujo

BROOOAKAKAKAA stop stop. dont get me started ill tear up ! emmie oomfghfgf i literally am in love with u ! youre my best friend stop stop ! you make me feel so safe and comfortable like i rlly dont feel that way with a lot of ppl ! you have such a bright heart and just warm energy ITS SO CONTAGIOUS. ur so contagious im sniffling ! we must have more emmoshi interactions ! i am giving u all my motivation n energy for 2023 :')

@vilsoo

JES OMGOMG ! i swear youve been sticking around w me for SOOO LONG like almost 2 years?? i think?? but SOB your energy is so bright to me i adore talking to u sm :') there's always tea to spill n its sooo investinghahakak but i cannot wait for more memories n interactions w you ! you are my go-to for fnaf fics ALWAYS ill always put people onto you when they ask for jjk / fnaf recs ehehheeh

2022 SAETOSHIS. thank you all for the memories, craziness, love n hugs! i adore u all! // all credits for music go to animenz on youtube, song performed: kimiiro signal - saekano: how to raise a boring girlfriend OP

[forcebookish]

thank you for tagging me, @ariadnekurosaki!!!

1 . How did you get into writing fanfiction?

uhh, when i was twelve i wrote horrendously bad self-insert inuyasha (and bleach?) fanfic on a now-defunct website that doesn't exist anymore lol since then i've bopped in and out of fandoms under different usernames across many platforms. often, i'll lose the muse in 2-3 year chunks, but get sucked back in for new fandoms.

except bleach. i always come back to bleach 😩

2. How many fandoms have you written in?

oh god, if we count dc, marvel, k-pop, and thai dramas (+rpf) as all their own respective fandoms (ie. not distinguishing between arrow, the flash, young justice, etc.), it's twelve - if we don't, it's almost thirty. a lot of my exo fanfics only reference other groups/solo artists, so i think that's too generous. the point is, it's a lot lol

3. How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

on and off since i was twelve (although when i was five i wrote a picture book about the disney princesses hanging out with me), but probably a total of 8 years actually active?

4. Do you read or write more fanfiction?

write more. i rarely read fanfiction unfortunately D:

5. What is one way you’ve improved as a writer?

i'm less verbose and my voice is cleaner.

6. What’s the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

quebecois sacres.

7. What’s your favorite type of comment to receive on your work?

when i make someone cry 😈 nah i really love detailed ones with quotations, ones that pinpoint exactly what parts hit them or meant the most to them. but tbh i love short keymashes too!

8. What’s the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

hmmm🤔 i don't think i write anything that out there... yet. i guess i like to write about psychic connections and niche super powers.

9. What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

ones with a lot of worldbuilding. and porn lol

10. What is the easiest type?

ones with a lot dialogue and character introspection.

11. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

my office, the tv room, my bed, sometimes outside. i used to write in coffee shops, at the library, work (especially when i worked at the library lol) before the pandemic and i became a hermit. in gdocs, because i write on my pc, chromebook, and phone. all hours.

12. What is something you’ve been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

there's this one prompt from the bleach kink meme that i've been thinking about for ten years that has the potential to be really gross or really hot. or both. i might write it for the >5k au event in august idk

13. What made you choose your username?

lapmonster: my twitter username for a while before i decided to start posting on ao3 so i made my ao3 to match; it's a pun on rap monster. kairumption: when i started writing exo fic this was my livejournal url; another pun, it's kai + kyrumption (from angel). it's also where my nickname rum comes from. farewellswords: my twitter username changed from lapmonster in 2019 or 2020 because bts got too popular and army were accusing me of being a namjoon anti lmao; it's a chapter title from bleach.

probably should have kept kairumption as all of them, but i like farewellswords 🤷‍♀️ tbh it would have been my url here if an inactive acc didn't already have it. because, i mean, come on.

COME ON

okaaaay let's tag: @pomslices @retiredficwriter @komari-maxx @ellasaru12 @athousandbyeol @bytheforcebook and anyone else who wants to participate! :D sorry if i forgot you!

[greyskyflowers]

Hello! 🤍 Looking for my posts about certain fandoms?

One piece: setting sail with greyskyflowers

Haikyuu: playing volleyball with greyskyflowers

MHA: saving the day with greyskyflowers

JJK: killing curses with greyskyflowers

19 days: 19 days with greyskyflowers

Naruto: fighting ninjas with greyskyflowers

Lockwood & Co: hunting ghosts with greyskyflowers

Bleach: reaping souls with greyskyflowers

Demon Slayer: chasing demons with greyskyflowers

Samurai Champloo: looking for sunflowers with greyskyflowers

Dead Boy Detectives: solving cases with greyskyflowers

My personal poetry, nonfandom specific ramblings and writing prompts/inspirations: writing with greyskyflowers

If you like something ~ please reblog! Doing so helps other people find and enjoy my stuff too 😊

Additional Info/Questions:

Q: "I'm writing a fic based on your posts and I just want to make sure that's okay?"

A: Yes! I encourage all interactions! I do ask that you put my name somewhere in there so people can find me if they'd like and also send me a link/pic of the final product! I love to see what everyone makes :)

Q: "Hi! Can we message/ask you for ideas and help with our own fics?"

A: Sure! I can't promise I'll be too much help or that I'll get to each message/ask but I'll do my best!

Q: "Will you ever put your stuff on AO3? I'd love to be able to bookmark them!"

A: Unfortunately, I will most likely not be doing that. 😞 I don't really think of my stuff as fics. I consider them more discussions, ideas, ramblings, outlines, etc. I really try to make sure to use the above tagging system for all my posts though so if Tumblr behaves then you should be able to click one and see all/most of my posts for that particular fandom. Maybe someday I'll sit down and write a actual fic. 👀

Q: "I started following you for a specific fandom but you don't really post about it anymore. Are you going to or should I unfollow?"

A: I would encourage you to just go ahead and unfollow if you need to ask. At the end of the day my blog is mine and I can post or not post whatever I want. I try really hard to not feel like I'm letting people down when I don't post about a specific fandom for awhile. I'm not about that. My posts are for me and it's just a fun extra bonus when other people like them too. My interests go through cycles frequently, and I always come back around but I can't tell you how long it might be before I post about whatever fandoms you're a part of.

[aghw18]

A quick guide of using 🔍 on my page:

Atla➡️ All atla stuff including random words, memes, reblogging and my sketches etc, basically this fandom

Freedom fighters➡️ All contents related to freedom fighters, including reblogging, sketches, memes and headcanons etc

Avatar the last airbender➡️ Posts that i ve created, including random thoughts, headcanons and sketches etc

My art➡️ Drawings doodles etc

My brain says CROSSOVER➡️ characters that gives me similar vibes

Scissor seven➡️ all posts related, including reblogs

Cike wuliuqi ➡️ includes original scissor seven content of mine

Black butler ➡️ all posts related, including reblogs

Kuroshitsuji ➡️ includes original content of mine

Bleach ➡️ all posts related, including reblogs

ブリーチ ➡️ includes original content of mine

Chat ask tell quest? Idk basically anything ➡️ Replying ask box. As it says, basically anything, abt my drawings or more headcanons etc. Also if theres anything u wanna see me draw, just pop them in here.

Commission open 👉 more info

Twitter 👉 same username, for nsfω & gοrе соntents, but since twitter is dying, I'm slowly moving my stuff to Bsky , a twitter alternative

Just started Ko-Fi

I don't like using full stops so i use a lot of "..."

I post then edit tags later; i edit A LOT

I'm neurodivergent, i m on spectrum

⚠️🗣️ I've got problems regarding replying messages so hold in mind that i might take a VERY VERY VERY long time to reply ur message, weeks even. I'll always try to reply as quick as i can. I do read them in time but it just takes a lot for me to reply. Most of the times it's just i don't have the mental capacity to do so.

But dont worry abt sending me messages, i rlly enjoy reading them (＞人＜;)

[ungrateful-cyborg-moved]

10 fandoms, 10 characters, 10 tags

Basic rules: choose 10 fandoms that you are part of/support, and choose a favorite character from each of those. Then, tag ten folks!

Tagged by: @miqojak! Ty! It didn't even take me half a year to get around it this time XD

In no particular order, except for the first one ever since I'm 16. Also finding 10 fandoms is kinda hard because I'm def not that active, or even a passive participant, in so many fandoms so you'll get a glimpse of my younger self instead :'D

And long post ahead so thank you in advance if you've taken the time to go through this list!

Kanon, from Saint Seiya

Look, this is the blorbo and if you see similarities between his backstory and Kazan's, no you don't. Mentioning either him or the manga is enough to get my friends to sigh and groan as they await the inevitable gushing/rant that'll follow (which reminds me that I haven't, actually, gushed about him or ranted about the manga in quite a while now). Which is to say, I love lonely sad villains/antiheroes and if you've ever seen me mentioning the forbidden blorbo, now you know who I'm talking about.

Emet-Selch, from FFXIV

At this point I feel like I should mention that I do not stand in favor of manipulating or killing people as a form of therapy :'D

A bit more seriously though, I think he's the first character I felt so viscerally about in the game? Like I never agreed with his views but going through ShB I really hoped we'd managed to bring him to our side. My tragedy-loving ass won't complain about how ShB ended for him, mind you, but still.

Honorable mention for Thancred too, whom I feel more and more attached to as times passes, and also Y'shtola but in her case it's perhaps more the fact that she's, in terms of behavior, very much My Type.

Madi, from Black Sails

There are many great characters in that TV show and if you haven't seen it, I can only recommend it to you. But really, Madi is my favourite of the lot and definitely the inspiration for Inge if I had to pick one.

Between her cleverness, her dignity, her integrity, her charisma, her dedication to her people and her cause and her curiosity about others, what's not to love about her?

Varric Tethras, from Dragon Age 2 / DA:I

I was hesitating between Isabela and Cullen, but then I remembered the Best Companion Ever and how could I not put Hawke's most loyal friend on the list? I love him, love his loyalty, how he stays compassionate despite all he goes through, his sense of humor, his honesty... Only wish we could have romanced him in DA:I, but on the other end I like his story with Bianca so I'm not too sad about not being able to.

Byakuya Kuchiki, from Bleach

In the spirit of this dash game I'll respect the rules and make a choice, but if I'd filled this list any other day, I might have put Grimmjow there instead :'D

Anyway. I love a stubborn man with a stick up his ass and too many (conflicting) principles despite a rebellious heart who needs to be almost killed to start thinking that perhaps, just perhaps, he could have handle a Situation better.

And I love this character development past that point.

He wasn't an inspiration for Wolfe, but they're very much alike in several aspect. Byakuya is, however, a lot better at keeping a straight face.

Lois Habiba, from Torchwood S3

I haven't watched Torchwood in a long time but I remember her. In fact I remember Lois better than I remember some of the main cast.

She was just a normal young woman who had managed to get a really good job and risked everything to do the right thing and idk. She was just a really solid character that deserved better recognition.

Dean Winchester. Do I need to say from where?

Look, I loved all five seasons of Supernatural. A shame they didn't add more later!

And with Dean it's a bit personal so I'm not gonna go deep in details about it, but let's just say that there's quite a bit of me that I recognized in him and I just want to give that man a hug.

Donna Noble, from Doctor Who

I'm not up to date with the new seasons/episodes so no spoilers please!

But hm, yeah. I think what I loved the most about how Russel T. Davies was directing the show was how real his everyday people turned companion felt, and while I preferred Rose when I was younger, the older I get, the more appreciation I have for Donna.

She's just so full of life and character, so brave and so unapologetic about being herself despite her self-esteem issues, but I think what I love above all else about her is how she always acted as an equal to the Doctor.

I'm gonna repeat myself but really, the older I get, the more I love her. And I really need to catch up :'D

Cain Hargreaves, from the Cain saga

Honestly I don't expect anyone to remember this manga XD It's an old one I read when I was a teenager and one of the few I kept despite not having re-read it in 10+ years. I don't remember that much from it but I do remember the ending quite well.

Anyways. Cain's a young earl with a tragic past, a strong sense of justice, more money than common sense, a love for poisons and a fear of commitment. Truly, what could go wrong with such a character?

Also:

"Have I ever failed a promise to you? - Yes, all the time." after his sister made him swear he'd come back to her alive is just perfect.

Spike, from BtVS

He's devoted, he's cruel, he's romantic, he's brave, he's pathetic, he's capable of taking responsibility for his actions... I love a multifaceted character and I've had a soft spot for Spike ever since I've watched the series for the first time.

I rewatched it not too long ago and it didn't age that well imo, or maybe I'm just more critical than I used to be, but I still think Spike is an awesome character and I love that it was in spite of Whedon's intentions for him.

---

And I believe that brings me at 10 characters for 10 fandoms! It strangely feels more like undressing in front of strangers than actually undressing in front of strangers :'D So obviously I'm gonna tag a few people to do it too:

@under-the-blood-moonlight @merlwybs-wife @voidtekarc @alannah-corvaine @ashenbun @zhauric @biff-adventurer @tea-and-conspiracy and @confusedtia! And frankly anyone else who wants to!

[ghost-in-the-hall]

Dances In The Moonlight (Falk Maria Schlegel x GN! Reader) - Part X

WARNINGS: Discussion of ritualistic practices, we celebrating the summer solstice in this one babyyy, Falk being sweet and cute per usual, let me know if I missed any, this took me a couple days to write so I can't remember all of it.

Also, I'm starting a tag list, if you would like to be notified when I post shoot me a message!

Part IX - Part XI

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You hesitantly followed Falk into the ritual room, the door letting out a haunting creek as it slowly closed behind you. "I thought you said I wasn't allowed in here?"

He chuckles, "well there isn't much of a secret to keep anymore, is there?" You return his playful grin, he did have a point. Your footsteps echoed in the empty room. "Besides, there's something I want to show you." His warm hands landed on your waist as he lifted you from the floor and into his seat around the table. He headed to a chest in the corner of the room, digging through the contents. You pushed all the way back, your feet now barely peeking out over the edge. Falk's gaze lands on you as you make yourself comfortable in his ceremonial chair, a chuckle escaping his lips as he approaches. "You look very cute up there, meine Maus." He stands before you, carefully unwrapping the crimson cloth he held in his hand. You gasped at the relic, a gorgeous ceremonial headpiece that was adorned with the finest jewels and perfectly bleached bones. "Roel found this stored away in the archives the other day, it was my mother's."

"It's beautiful." You ducked your head down to get a closer look at it. You felt it would've been disrespectful to try and pick it up. "What was it for?"

"She wore this the day she married my father." He smiles fondly. "I'll have to dig up the pictures, I think you'll enjoy them."

"Where are your parents now?" You approached the question carefully. You had never heard Falk talk about his family before, but you would be lying if you said you weren't curious.

"Retired peacefully in the mountains." He gives you a knowing smirk, he expected you to think something horrible had happened. "My father is somewhat of a recluse, as I'm sure you can imagine." You share a laugh. He carefully picks up the headpiece, setting it gently on your head. "I want you to hold onto this."

"I'm flattered, really, but why?" He takes your hands in his.

"It's a promise. A promise to keep you safe, to love you to the best of my ability, to never let anything hurt you." He brings your knuckles to his lips. "You're very special to me, I don't want you to ever forget that." He caresses your cheek, looking deeply into your eyes. Your lip quivered as you felt tears prick against your lashes. You saw the briefest flash of panic in his eyes as he thought he did something to upset you.

"Falk… I love you." Tears slid down your cheeks, you rested your forehead against his, the cool metal encasing one of the many crystals of the headpiece digging into your skin slightly.

"I love you too, Schatz." He cups your cheeks in his hands, delicately wiping away your tears." You both jumped at the sound of the door opening.

"There you are!" Attila lets out an exasperated sigh. "We're going to be late, you need to get ready." He noticed you had been crying. "(Y/N), what did he do? I'll kill him, I'll make it look like an accident." You can't help but laugh.

"Happy tears, I'm fine Father Attila, don't worry." Falk helps you down from your seat, carefully removing and rewrapping the headpiece.

"(Y/N), just call me Attila. You're Falk's seelenbindung, I think we can be a little more casual." He laughs. You muttered the word to yourself, Falk chuckling at your confusion.

"I'll explain later, come on, you're coming too." You pushed your fingers through his as he hurried through the halls. "I'm sorry this is happening on such short notice, I forgot we had to go to this today."

"Where are we going?" You watched as he digs through his closet in a panic. You hear him make a triumphant sound as he produces two ceremonial robes from his wardrobe.

"To celebrate the summer solstice. Here, put this on." You held up your arms as he dropped the robe over your head, the fabric pooling at your feet. You watched as Falk put on his own ceremonial robe, one that looked incredibly similar to the one he gave you, just missing a few embellishments. "Remind me, I have to take you for a consultation for your own robe." You rushed out the door behind him, he explained as the two of you headed down to his car. "You being my Seelenbindung means it's encouraged that you attend events with me. You get your own ceremonial robe, which you will have a hand in personalizing however you like."

"Question." You interrupt his rambling.

"Answer." He responds quickly.

"What does Zeelin-" You don't even attempt to finish the word, knowing you were just going to butcher it 

"Seelenbindung?" You nod. "It means soul tie, it's kind of our version of a soulmate." You let out a surprised yelp as his car jerked forward.

"I take it this is an older robe." You had so many questions. What events would you be attending with him? Was there any type of initiation ceremony you had to go through? How should you design your robe?

"Yes it is." He chuckles. You ran your fingers over the intricate embroidery, soft golden thread against a stark black background. The robe he was currently wearing wasn't much different. If anything it was more ornate. Beading worked effortlessly into the stitches of the embroidery that were laid in a somehow even more complex pattern. His robe was also lined with a deep maroon silk that peeked out from his billowing sleeves as he moved. You jumped as a horn blared next to you, looking out the driver's side window you saw a car starting to pass you. You bursted out laughing at the sight of Matthew's face pressed against the glass. Falk shakes his head with a smirk. "Also, I know having to rush was probably stressful, but you'll have fun. We just need to get there before sundown." You pulled into a dirt lot that was packed with cars, the rest of the members of the high clergy waiting on your arrival. You walked down a long winding footpath through the woods until you came across a clearing. Much like the dinner you had intended in the past, the sight before you was nothing like you expected it to be. A small group of creatures you didn't recognize were working on setting up for a bonfire, the longer you looked around you realized you being fully human you were more than likely the minority in this situation.

"You look shocked." You jump at Charles' voice being right next to your ear. He chuckles at your amazed expression. "This is one of the few places they can safely remove any glamor magic, so don't be scared by all the horns and sharp teeth." You nod, trying your hardest not to stare. You remained glued to Falk's side as he made his rounds through other attendees. You watch a man approach the two of you, adorned in papal robes and… skeleton paint? Falk's eyes light up at the sight of him, the two exchanging a hug.

"Eh, and who might this be? This must be your seelenbindung." He smiles warmly at you, shaking your hand.

"That they are, Papa, this is (Y/N). Schatz, this is Papa Emeritus IV, he's a very good friend of our church." He gives you a polite nod. "We heard you and your Prime Mover are expecting, congratulations!"

"Thank you, we're all very excited. You'll have to stop by sometime, take your amoré on a stroll through Primo's garden, sí?" Falk chuckles, nodding his head.

"I promise, we'll stop by soon. We've been a little preoccupied."

"Yes, of course, I'm sure that last super moon complicated things." Papa's eyes flash down to you for the briefest of moments, almost as if he wasn't sure he should be discussing this in front of you.

"It did, but it wasn't anything we couldn't handle." He wraps his arm around your shoulder. "If you'll excuse us." You politely make your way over to the rest of the high clergy, the celebration of the Summer Solstice starting anytime now. "He's the head of the Satanic Temple across town." You and Falk nestled down with the rest of the high clergy as you watched the sun set over the horizon. He reached out and took your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. Cheers rang out through the crowd as the last dying light disappeared. Falk pulled up the hood of your ceremonial robe, quietly instructing you to kneel in the dirt just as he was. You copy his instructions carefully, taking the chance to glance around only to see the rest of the crowd around you all doing the same thing. Hushed murmurs of Latin phrases you didn't recognize danced in the air, a noticeably magical shift in energy with every syllable that was uttered. The bonfire roared to life as the collective prayer ceased.

You were amazed at the sight before you. Despite everyone's different backgrounds, faiths, species, it was unmistakable. This was one big family. Outcasts that had all found each other and made something wonderful out of it. "Falk, this is incredible." You whisper to him. 

"I told you you'd have fun." He playfully nudges your shoulder. You decided to sit and watch the festivities around you for a while. Conversations buzzed in every corner of the clearing, ceremonial robes discarded, drinks were shared, the smell of the food that was being prepared made your mouth water. "You know, you can get up and join them." He gives you an encouraging smile, nodding in the direction of the crowd around the bonfire.

"Oh, I don't really feel like it's my place to join." You say nervously. He takes your hand, bringing your knuckles to his lips.

"Schatz, it's alright, everyone here is a friend. I'm sure they'll welcome you in with open arms." You nod, letting him drag you into the festivities. You watched from the sidelines at first. Beautiful humans and creatures alike chanting and dancing around the flame. 

"What are they saying?" You ask Falk quietly.

"They're asking for good harvests and fortune, the dance is kind of like an offering." You nod, watching the figures swirl in the hot orange glow. "Come on." He tugs you in the direction of the bonfire, never letting go of your hand as he prompts you to dance along with him. In no time you found yourself laughing, moving your body in whatever way felt natural as you circled the inferno. Once you had sufficiently worn yourself out the two of you collapsed side by side in the soft grass on the outskirt of the clearing. "It's nice to see you enjoying yourself." His warm hand caresses your cheek. You leaned over, lips pressed firmly to his. He lets out a pleased hum, arm circling around your waist as you let your head fall into his chest. A small smile formed on your lips. You listened to his heartbeat, fingers ghosting over the lines of his tattoos. In that moment with him you truly felt at home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag List: @ramblingoak @the-hole-in-terzos-shoe @jumpcauseimfroggy @mustluvecho @rabidghoul @kissingghouls @copiousloverofcopia @moss-the-moth @littlegirlsdontplaynice @vampghoulette @angellayercake (I think that everyone if I missed you let me know)