#also I love how it also shows that its never too late to pursue what you love just like what Dong Eun did

[mikuyuuss]

Ok, not only did Moon Dong Eun avenge the villains of this story. She found love afterwards and was able to pursue architecture like she always wanted to. She now dresses freely with her tattoo, proudly showing her scars. She's no longer confined to her trauma. Dong Eun got her revenge AND her happy ending!

Even though she was so convinced that she's a terrible person for wanting revenge, she actually managed to touch the lives of the people around her through simple acts of kindness (empathizing with them for being victims) and those same people came back to support her as well.

It's usually "revenge is bad" this "you got revenge but at what cost" that, but no, she got her revenge AND her and other people's happy ending. Even though it's a dark story about how victims suffer, there's always the underlying message of hope, where they also understand and help eachother. Even if they had to bend the rules to get it, The. Victims. Won. Oh. My. Goodness.

In the end, it wasn't exactly just "revenge," it was also about bringing justice to the victims.

[tinyarsonist]

Volume: Up

"I bet I can make you scream in Korean."

Summary: In which heart throb K-Pop Idol, Bangchan, just shows you how 'Christopher' he can really be.

MDNI 18+ Only

TW: idol!Chan, IdolTrainee!Y/N(fem!), drinking, piv, unprotected sex (wrap it up), smut in general, dirty talk, swearing, masturbation, dumification, nipple play (fem!), cum on stomach, PleasureDom!Chan, switch!reader (fem!), pull out, cum on stomach, let me know if I missed anything!

Italics are in Korean. Bold is in Spanish. Rest in English.

Volume Series: Part One | Part Two | ?

You were still in awe.

You started your career as an idol fairly late in the game, making you older than most. But, when you entered the world of K-pop, you knew this was what you were meant to do. You were already creating music since you were young, and how hard could it be?

Very.

There were days as a trainee when you felt like giving up. You left your friends and family back home to pursue your dream, and after years, you still felt like you were right back at the same spot you started. Never moving. Stagnant.

That's when you discovered Stray Kids. Watching their debut to where they are now. It motivated you.

Then, one day, your company announces that they want you to lead a team. They presented you with suitable candidates for your girl group, but something in you felt like something wasn't right. "Sorry," you apologize to your board. "But, if I may be so bold as to recruit my own members?"

You wanted a family. Craved friendship beyond just another gig. And, well, let's say it worked out very well for you.

This brings you to the present day--standing in DIV studio, surrounded by its members, to do an interview. Your group was just starting out and already doing well. You've posted a couple of dance practices and some ballad covers you performed as a group, tracking some major views across all social media. DIV wanted to be the first to be a part of the soon-to-be international hype.

"You ready?" Eric smiled at you as the crew set up your microphone. You nodded happily. The rest of your group couldn't make it due to schedule. It felt weird not having the rest of your girls around you, but knew this wasn't an opportunity you just passed up.

Time passes, and so far, the interview is going great. It was amazing being around like-minded people. And, it was also nice being able to curse and not have to worry about your 'imagine' among them. They were free to be who they wanted. They wanted to break the mold; conformity was not in their dictionary. It took a while to let your company agree to the interview in the first place, but this was the direction you wanted to take the group. To be yourself and just produce music.

"Okay, so next up is the heart rate challenge." Eric smiled. You were divided into teams; you and Eric vs. Peniel and BM. The winner would be dubbed by the lowest combined heart rate.

"You're going down!" BM teased as Peniel hyped him up in the back. You grin brightly.

"Considering you boys are literally jumping around before the monitor is even placed, I think it's safe to say we'll win."

"Oh okay, that's how it's gonna be??" Peniel laughed. "Then let's make a bet; the loser buys everyone barbeque!"

Eric and you agreed in a heartbeat. You were already craving galbi and rice. Peniel essentially just bought the dinner you were going to buy tonight anyway.

As the heart monitors are placed, you try your best to stay calm. You were an anxious person in general, but when push comes to shove, you always had a way of relaxing yourself.

Peniel and BM went first. Eric and you teased them relentlessly during their time duration of 5 minutes. Peniel started blushing during his time up when you started throwing winks and kisses his way. Their combined score was 250.

"That's not far!" Peniel groaned as the video crew asked for a short break to recalibrate their equipment. "She's too cute, like how does someone not get flustered?"

"It's all fun and games in love and war," you winked at him. Everyone laughed except Peniel, who just took out his phone and pouted. His fingers typed furiously on his keyboard. Once it was time to get the cameras rolling again, Peniel had a knowing smirk on his face. You couldn't help but wonder what he was concocting. You just knew he was plotting his revenge against you.

Eric went first. Despite the constant harassment Peniel and BM gave him, you couldn't help but laugh at their jabs. "You're supposed to be on my team!" Eric roared at you at his last 10 seconds on the clock. Despite everything, his heart rate totaled to 120. All you had to do was ignore the comments for a minute. You got this. You sat down in the middle of the floor and crossed your legs, getting in an almost meditative position. The rest followed. Then the buzzer started.

"So," Peniel started as soon as the timer started going. "You learned Korean by yourself, right?"

You shot him a distrusting glance. "Yes..."

Peniel and BM nodded their heads slowly. "Interesting"/"Yes, yes, very interesting." Eric shot you a glance. He could feel it, too. Based on how the two acted Eric's turn was completely different, they were calm. Too calm. They were up to something.

"One might say," Peniel feigned thoughtfulness by stroking his chin. "You had an interest in learning Korean before you even had thought of becoming a trainee."

Crap. He saw the clip.

Before your group days, you would do little lives here and there. Just want to document your early days and interact with anyone who wants to chat. During that time, you mentioned the real reason you learned Korean was to easily watch interviews without the need for subtitles. Then you casually mentioned how much of a fan you were for a certain boy group. Your fans, which was very little back then, took those clips and circulated them online. Which was fine. It gained some traction that you were a STAY and helped grow your platform. It was a bit embarrassing, essentially admitting that you only learned the language to watch their episodes and lives to get full context. But, hey, it also helped you get to where you are today.

Getting bullied by two idols so they don't have to pay for your dinner.

"Yes, Peniel. I learned Korean so I can watch Stray Kids' interviews live." You roll your eyes but keep track of where your monitor is. 95bpm. Not bad. So long as you stayed below 130, that galbi was yours.

Peniel and BM continued to stroke their chins. "Interesting"/"Yes, yes, very... Stray Kids fan. Very cool"

Peniel held up a finger before leaving the room. You looked around at the crew, confused. Eric laughed and peered after him; "Where is he going?"

His question was answered as Peniel stepped back into the room with a shorter figure behind him. You moved around to peer behind Peniel, and when you locked eyes with the guest, your heart rate shot up. 110bpm.

Eric and BM rose to give a small bow when Chan said his hellos. You stayed still in your place. Embarrassment immediately washed over you. But you took a deep breath in and out, 3 minutes until you can freak out. 3 minutes, and you can process every single emotion you are feeling.

Chan gave you a little wave, his dimples showing as he smiled. Ugh, he might as well shoot you in the heart right now.

"You're not gonna stand up?" Peniel teased. You immediately shook your head. As much as you wanted to say hi, dinner was calling your name. Seeing Chan in the flesh was amazing. But Galbi beat everything at this moment. BM smiled brightly and motioned for Chan to take a seat next to you. How sweet.

2 minutes. 115bpm.

You bowed your head slightly to say hello, still a bit too stunned to speak. Chan gave a small head bow back. "Sorry about this," he chuckled. You told him it was okay, but still unable to make eye contact. Despite that, you knew he looked incredible. He always did.

Focus! You tried to snap yourself out of it and took deep breaths. In and out. In and out.

"So... you learned Korean to watch us live? That's sweet," Chan felt awkward all of a sudden. When Peniel texted him, this wasn't what he expected to be doing during the interview. "How many languages do you know?"

You close your eyes and focus back on the game. Here you were making casual conversation, while 3 other idols were jabbing at you, trying to get your heart rate back up. "Four; English, Korean, Japanese, and Spanish."

"Holy crap, how is it going down?!" Eric looked at the monitor and backed up at you. You kept your eyes closed, trying to maintain a steady rhythm. Everyone but Chan was losing their shit.

You could hear BM jump to his feet. The impending doom of a very large bill drove his heart rate up. "Chan, do something!" He exclaimed in Korean. Chan giggled next to you; "What? What do I do?"

"Hit on her!" Peniel got up as well. All attention is now on Chan. Eric stood up and pointed at the two competitors; "Hey! Hey! You leave her alone!"

You couldn't help but chuckle; "I was subscribed to his bubble. I was in the trenches with the rest of STAY. There's nothing he can say that I haven't heard."

Chan clicked his teeth with his tongue. His eyes narrowed. A challenge. He looked at you, with your eyes still closed, before casting his gaze over at Eric. "Anyway, we can mute our mics for a sec?"

Your eyes shot open.

1 minute. 120bpm.

BM ran over to mute your mic. As soon as he backed up, Chan leaned in close to your ear. His breath tickled your cheek, and you had to close your eyes again. 125 bpm. 30 seconds.

"I bet I can make you scream in Korean."

Chan wasn't expecting you to turn your head so quickly towards him. The way your face flushed. Your eyes wide. Everything about you was making his heart race. You locked eyes with him and felt like you couldn't breathe. This was it. That free galbi was gone.

The buzzer went off.

Everyone turned to the monitor.

129bpm.

You shot up from your seat and hugged Eric. Peniel and BM groaned at their loss. Chan laughed as he watched the two of you jumping around, singing about free barbeque.

He took a moment to sneak a look at you, his gaze traveling up and down. The way your hair bounced with you and how your outfit was snuggling your curves just right. He stood up as Eric said their sign-off. Once the cameras were shut off, the teasing started between the four. Peniel placed his arm around the younger idol and pulled him in a side hug. "It's okay," he reassured Chan. "It's not entirely your fault. A good majority of it. But, not fully."

Chan laughed and rolled his eyes. Everyone came up to thank him for coming over. That's when he locked eyes with you again, giving him a bright smile.

You gave the bow you weren't able to give before, formally introducing yourself. You all talked for a bit until you felt your hunger start to spike up; "Okay, so when are we getting dinner?"

The group settled for a time later tonight so everyone could get ready. BM invites Chan to tag along.

"No no," Chan shook his head, not wanting to impose. Peniel tickled his stomach as the rest of the group tried to get him to agree. You couldn't help but chime in. Part of you being selfish and wanting to spend more time with him and also wanting to get a jab in at Peniel and BM; "Come on, it'll be fun. And free!"

Chan looked at you. It was subtle, but his cheeks turned a bit red. "Y-yea, okay."

Chan made his way back to his dorm. The rest of the members who share the space are away on their own schedules. It was rare for Chan to spend the night alone.

He groaned as he plopped on the couch. He was still a bit jet lagged from flying from NYC back home. Laying his head on the back of the couch, he tried to take a nap before having to get ready to head out for dinner with you and the rest of the group.

You.

His mind was restless, and for some reason, they kept fluttering back to you. No matter how much he tried to push them out, he couldn't stop thinking about your big doe eyes. The way your breath hitched as he leaned in. The perfume you were wearing.

Was it Channel? Gucci? Whatever it was, it was flowery like a spring day. He could still smell it on his clothes oh so slightly.

Biting his lower lip, he got up from his seat and headed to the shower. The warm water was welcoming as he tried to clear his head. Unfortunately, it seemed there was only one thing to rid him of these thoughts.

The amount of guilt he felt once he stroked his cock to the thought of you was soon discarded as his mind wandered even more.

What were you like? Did you relinquish control or demand it? Were your lips as soft as he can imagine? Your mouth--oh God. How would it feel to have it wrapped around him? Were you a moaner? A screamer? Could he scramble your brain so much that you scream for him in Korean? Would you come in multiple languages?

He sped up his pace even faster. Water cascaded down his back as he faced the tile bathroom wall. One hand on the structure to ground him as he lost himself at the thought of you. He leaned his head back as he felt himself building and building. The warm water was a comforting feeling on his scalp.

The way he would take you as soon as you entered the dorm. No words, just a clash of flesh as he stripped you of your clothes and bent you over the couch. He wouldn't waste any time and would just thrust into your--oh God. How would you feel around his dick? How tight--

He muffled a moan as he came on his hand. The shower washed away any evidence of his inappropriate thoughts of you. He panted heavily and stood under the water for a couple of moments, pleasure rippling through him soon to be replaced with an abundant amount of guilt for getting off to someone he barely knew.

Maybe that was the thrill of it. Maybe the thought of having someone who didn't know his ups and downs is what did it for him.

Chan didn't have time to dwell on the thought as the time to meet up was fast approaching. And he hated to admit, but the thought of seeing you made his now softening cock twitch.

By the time Chan arrived at the restaurant, platters and drinks were spread across the shared table. BM and Peniel bought out a room so they could enjoy their meal without prying eyes. Chan could hear them hollering in the room before he even opened the door. His ears rang as they all loudly greeted him.

"Look who finally made it!" Peniel laughed as Chan took a seat across from them. Eric and BM were putting meat on the grill as they said their greetings. Chan couldn't help but scan the room, taking note that you weren't there. He tried to play it cool as he asked if you were running late.

"She texted us saying there was something she needed to finish up at home," BM answered him. Eric couldn't help but wiggle his eyebrows at Chan.

"Why? Scared she might not come?"

"No, no." Chan chuckled awkwardly while looking off to the side. "Was just wondering, is all."

The boys all made cooing noises. A flush of embarrassment washed over Chan at their teasing. Peniel smirked; "Wouldn't blame you, she's gorgeous!"

Chan poured himself a shot of soju, trying his best to drown out their teasing and take the stress away. The three men quit their teasing and talked about mundane things; schedules, new music coming out, and how big the bags under Chan's eyes were.

"I just flew back from New York!"

"Doesn't matter! Ever heard of eye cream!"

They were laughing at one another by the time you entered the room. Everyone stood up to greet you with a bow, and you bowed back. Gesturing for them to take their seats again. "Sounds like a party in here," you smiled as you took a seat next to Chan. He took note of how you wore your hair up in a messy bun, showing off your silver necklace. That flowery smell radiated off of you, and he had to lean a bit to the side so it didn't flood his senses in all the right ways.

"Is that soju or vodka?" You spot a filled shot glass from across the table. "Actually, it doesn't matter. Hand me it."

Chan watched you down the shot with a smile and motioned for Eric to pour you another one. "Hard day?"

The second shot went down a bit smoother and you gave him a grin. "You can say that."

He didn't need to know that the line he whispered in your ear had stressed you out to your core. It was possibly the hottest thing any man has ever said to you. It was all you could think about by the time you reached your dorm. His voice echoed in the back of your mind causing your body to feel hot.

He didn't need to know the real reason why you were late to dinner.

That you were squirming on your bed, rubbing yourself furiously between your legs. Trying to get all the tension out of your body before having to see him again.

And now you were sitting next to him. The man responsible for one of the best solo sessions in your life.

"I mean, I did have to spend half the day with these three." You gestured to the rest of the group who just booed at you. Eric rolled up a napkin and threw it your way, causing you to laugh.

As you and the group ate and drank, the room was beginning to get louder and louder. It wasn't long until everyone became tipsy.

You just finished cooking up your Galbi and offered it to the rest of the group who everyone, except Chan, declined. You used the tongs to bring it over to his plate before attempting to cut it. "Damn things," you huffed under your breath. The scissors were dull and worn out. Trying to cut through the meat was as effective as slicing a rib-eye with a spoon.

"Here," Chan grabbed the tongs and scissors from your hand. Despite the very brief time that his fingers brushed yours, you couldn't help but blush a bit as he gave you your half. You didn't have time to feel embarrassed as you caught Eric eyeing the two of you. He had his fingers interlaced and resting his head on them.

"You two look cute together~"

"Shut up," you mumble and grab some kimchi to add to your plate.

Chan sat quietly next to you. He plopped some food in his mouth, the best excuse he had to not comment. BM chuckled before pouring another round of drinks. "What did you say to her anyway? Peniel was screaming so loud I couldn't even hear it."

The two of you were sitting so close to one another, that you could feel Chan stiffen next to you. No doubt, wanting to avoid another round of ridicule from his colleagues.

"Awe, jealous he wasn't whispering in your ear instead?"

That snarky reply was all it took for the other two boys to holler and tease the living crap out of him. As the night progressed, soon talk of continuing the party commenced. Chan mentioned he had a free dorm tonight.

"You in?"  Eric asked you. You looked up from your plate of Galbi and rice. You were so distracted by your plate that you didn't realize they were all waiting for your answer. You hesitated. You obviously had this attraction to Chan since the interview. Hell since even before you became a trainee. The frustration of him being so near, mixed with alcohol, might just be the equation for something disastrous.

Chan bit his lower lip while sneaking a glance at you. He knew it was stupid to invite everyone over. To invite you over. He was already feeling the effects of drinking so much, trying to keep pace with everyone. What if he slipped up? Did something that made you hate him?

But then a wonderful thought popped into his mind: What if something amazing happened?

"It'll be fun," Chan gave you his shy grin. Your heart raced as you two locked eyes. How could you say no to that face?

"You got this," you whispered to yourself as you stood in front of Chan's door. It wasn't every day you're invited to a celebrity's apartment. Especially one that you've imagined in bed with when you're stressed out after work. Everyone left in their own taxi after dinner, planning to meet up at Chan's. You stayed a bit behind to make some phone calls to your family overseas, promising that you would be there soon. "Totally normal get-together. Nothing to worry about."

After a couple of seconds, you gather enough courage to knock on the door. A moment or two the door swings open and Chan stands there. God, he looked great with his messy hair, black tee, and joggers. Giving him that ready-for-bed look--

"Wait, were you asleep?"

Chan's face turned red. He was in bed. But he definitely wasn't sleeping.

"They didn't text you? They got a call on the way over, their schedule moved up earlier in the morning so they headed back home."

Oh.

You pull out your phone and groan. "Batteries dead." You just had to make those calls? You knew your mom could talk your ear off.

"Sorry," you put the phone back in your pocket. Taking a step back, you start to head out. "Have a good night."

"Wait!" He couldn't just let you leave. It could be from all the alcohol, but watching you saunter away felt wrong. He wanted you near him. To stay. "It's late... You can charge your phone and call a cab here if you want."

You didn't fight it. You know you should've. Chan was right, it was late. The responsible thing to do would be to go home. But that didn't stop you from sitting on his couch waiting for your phone to charge enough to call your ride. The two of you scrolled through YouTube on his TV, chatting about anything that came to mind as you both sipped on some mixed drinks Chan concocted when you first entered the apartment.

It was weird. Without the others, conversation flowed almost naturally between you two.

"You mean to tell me, you've never watched any of your own fan cams?!" You exclaimed. Chan shook his head and laughed shyly.

"No, it felt weird watching close-ups of myself if that makes sense?"

"You really should, they always look phenomenal!"

You grabbed the remote to scroll through the recommended videos to watch. Chan took the opportunity took look you over for the umpteenth time tonight. Here he was just in joggers and an oversized shirt while you sported a cute long-sleeved crop top and tight jeans. He had to grab the pillow next to him to cover up the bulge he was sporting.

You settled on a music video by RenMakesMusic.  The strum of the guitar had Chan bobbing his head along to the beat. The lyrics were a bit dark but meaningful. "This is good," Chan mused. "Turn it up a bit."

You gladly obliged with a smile, pressing the remote's volume button so his subwoofers would have to do some heavy lifting. Music filled the apartment as the two of you watched the video. You didn't realize it initially, but your shoulder pressed against his. You slowly shifted to your right, to create distance not trying to give him the wrong impression, but were surprised when he leaned back into you. It was comforting.

It was right.

"Everything okay?"

Chan's question broke through your mind wandering. You felt your cheeks heat up a bit. "Y-yea, um. Where's the bathroom?"

"Down the hall, to the right."

Chan watched as you made your way to the guest bathroom. He couldn't help but keep his eyes on your backside. Once you disappeared, he leaned further back into the couch and groaned.

What was he doing? Letting you in this late, checking you out when you weren't looking, trying to get any physical contact no matter how little it was. It was stress, it had to be. His schedule has been so hectic lately his body was trying to find relief since his mind was almost running amock. Chan was so lost in thought that he let YouTube play on in the background. Not paying much attention to what was playing.

When you exited the bathroom, you were greeted with bongos and macarenas bouncing through the dorm. Peaking around the corner you spotted Chan leaning against the couch. He had his head back against the rest, his eyes closed. But despite his worn-down posture, he was still tapping his foot to the beat. "Aw, come on--you call that dancing?"

Your voice brought back his focus. His side smile gave you butterflies and you couldn't help but wear your own when he quipped; "Like you know how to dance to this?"

"Alright, Christopher. Get up." You grabbed the remote next to him and turned up the stereo even more. Hopefully, anyone living above or below the apartment wouldn't be able to hear how the bass shook the walls.

His grin widened at the name change. Almost nobody called him that anymore. There was a fine line between 'Chan' and 'Christopher', one that you seemed to be willing to cross.

What else were you willing to do?

Your hand was extended to him as you stood above him from his seat. The gleam in your eye was bright, almost playful. There was this weird feeling in the pit of his stomach. Bubbly and light. How the light casts around your silhouette made him realize why he felt the way he did when his eyes locked on you.

You were a goddess.

"You just gonna sit there? Come on, get up."

He didn't know what you said, but by the way, you grabbed onto his hand and pulled him from his seat, he knew he was in no position to argue.

You were a tough dance instructor. You corrected almost every misstep in Spanish. He couldn't comprehend your scolding, but he'll be damned to admit that at this point, he was doing it on purpose. There was something incredibly hot about being reprimanded in an unknown language.

"Dear all that is mighty," you sighed. "You're too stiff, loosen up a bit. Here, why don't you take the lead instead."

That caused his brain to malfunction a bit. He stuttered like a middle school kid being asked to dance for the first time. Without waiting for a reply, you grab his hands in yours and guide them on your body.  His hold on your waist was firm, but not too tough. He didn't want to scare you away. Not when he was so close to you he could smell your shampoo. Especially, not when you wrapped your arms around his neck and those eyes of yours were peering into his soul as you two stepped to the fast beat.

"Feel how my hips are moving?"

Oh, you bet he does.

Pushing those thoughts away, Chan tried to mimic your movement. "That's better!" You praised it, and it took everything in him not to press his body flush against yours right at that moment. He hated to admit it, but as the next song played, something with a slower tempo, every step you took with him around the living room, he somehow magically ended up closer to you.

This is the part where both of you could blame the alcohol.

You both were too inebriated to notice the fact that your phone was fully charged, that your fingers started to play with the bottom of his hair, or the fact that your faces were so close together. Chan's forehead rested on yours as the playlist finally died down to a softer ballad. YouTube ironically telling you two to slow down. But neither showing signs of listening.

"We...are going down a path you might regret." Chan closed his eyes to help steady his breathing. How were you able to do this earlier today? He felt like his heart was going to combust on the spot.

"That I might regret?" You whispered. Being this close to him felt surreal. You were sure you were about to wake up in your bed feeling very frustrated. "You won't?"

The feel of the pressure of your body was draining all his excitement from his chest to his dick. Another form of pressure was beginning to press against his underwear. A flood of penance sprung as quickly as his blood flowed to his quickening erection. "We just barely met. We don't know each other."

You pull away slightly so you can look up at him.

"Then, get to know me."

Chan knew this wasn't what you meant. But, it was too late to turn back now.

You were half-naked, a trail of clothes leading to his room.

For every question he asked, an article of your outfit was essentially ripped off you. Every question you answered, you returned the favor.

"Favorite food?" Whoops, there goes that necklace.

"Beef jerky with sticky rice." Goodbye, Chan's shirt!

He kissed you deeply and backed you up towards his bed. A brief pause as you fell into the soft cushions and he stared down at you. Your lips were puffy, chest rising and falling as you were trying to catch your breath. As much as he reveled in the thought of you being a goddess, there was something about bringing down a higher power that made him absolutely feral. Breaking you down bit by bit with every question. 

He climbed on the bed to hover over you, that stupid side smile making another appearance for the night. "That's not exactly a 'food', more of a meal."

"Sorry if I'm--ah. A bit distracted." You close your eyes as he attaches his lips right below your ear. Sucking on your soft skin, not hard enough to leave bruising, but a temporary mark just for his eyes. 

Biting your lower lip, you happily extended your neck a bit to give him more access. Mind all fuzzy and unable to think as he littered your neck with small kisses. Chan gripped your thigh and pulled it up a bit, lifting your hips just enough to hold you close to his pelvis,  kneading your thighs through your tights.

"Need you to focus." He nipped softly at your skin. "How else am I going to learn everything about you?

"Favorite position?" His fingers went under the hem of your tights and helped you shed the last outer part of your outfit. Once it was thrown somewhere across his room, you wrapped the leg he was holding up around his back and used what momentum you could gather to push his back on the bed. His hands instinctively grabbed onto your hips as you straddled him.

Your lips were soft and gentle as you leaned in for a kiss, the complete opposite of the intensity shared just moments before. "Don't care, so long as I'm full."

Chan wasted no time by stripping himself of his joggers and boxers on your behalf. Stifling a moan as best as he could once he felt your clothed core perfectly placed on his growing erection.  Guiding your hips to grind against him, he grinned as you threw your head back and sighed in content. Chan rocked his hips perfectly to the rhythm he set against you, providing the much-needed friction you craved.

You were starting to think he was tanking at dancing salsa on purpose.

"Anything off limits?" You couldn't even register that his hands snuck up to undo your bra clasp. He took a second to appreciate the view. Chan couldn’t stop himself from using his forearms to prop himself up to latch onto one of your nipples. Licking and sucking at anything he could grab. The mewls coming from your mouth sounded like a song he never wanted to end. Your hand caressed the back of his head, pressing him closer. 

“Just--mmm. Just don’t stop even if I say so.”

Leaving your breast with a wet ‘plop’, he stared up at you. You could see the usual gleam in his eyes disappear. They became dark, almost predatory. Chan lifted you off so he could be above you again. He traced your skin from the collarbone down to the hem of your underwear. You arched your back at his touch; “Luckily for you--I like begging.”

Your breath hitched. Surely, he could see the wet stain on your underwear by now.

“Any safe words then?”

Last question.

Chan finger slipped underneath the cloth and played with your folds. The way you squirmed underneath him made him want to ruin you more. The chuckle he let out when you tried to squeeze your thighs together made you feel warm all the way down to your core. Chan was quick to use his body to keep you nice and spread. All for him.

“L-lemon…”

“Sorry, couldn’t hear you.” Chan slipped the tip of his middle finger in you. “Could you speak up a bit?”

“Pendej--mmmphhh” You couldn’t finish your quip. Chan pushed in further until he was knuckle-deep. His lips hovered over yours as he slowly worked in and out of you. You kept arching and writhing as he continued his ministrations, mouth wide open as you let out silent moans.

“Ah, ah--I wanna hear you.” Once he added in a second finger, you couldn't contain yourself. Moans were spilling out of you like a pornstar. Even when he kissed you, there was nothing to stop the volume you were outputting. “Good job, baby.”

“Oh?” He chuckled as he felt your walls clamp down on him. “Did you like that?”

You couldn't speak as he kept pressing into you, wiggling his fingers against your walls. “C-chan…please…”

“Sorry, what was that?” He teased as he kissed around your collarbone.

“Chan…”

The bastard kept pretending not to hear you. As if he couldn't feel you practically leaking around his fingers and clenching around him like there was no tomorrow. 

You finally had enough.

Grabbing ahold of his face with one hand, you forced him to look at you. His cheeks smashed between your fingers. “Christopher, I swear to God--if you don't fuck me right now I'm taking over.”

Ah, so you did like to be in charge.

With a grin, he gladly ripped off your panties. He pulled away just a bit, taking in your appearance. Wanting to embed it into his brain for any future sessions he might have with himself later on.

He knew he should've grabbed a condom, but the alcohol was still flowing through him and he couldn’t stop himself as he slowly pushed into you. You tried finding words; how big he felt, how full he made you, but all that could come out were whimpers as he groaned and leaned in for another kiss to ease any pain you felt.

The two of you grind against one another. Chan never fully pulled out, keeping himself nice and snug in your warmth. Stretching you out, oh so sweetly.

Chan wasted no time in picking up his thrust as you tapped his shoulder, indicating that he was okay to move. You squeaked as he hooked your knees on his shoulders and leaned down to essentially bend you in half. He was hitting a spot you never felt before; not with previous boyfriends and definitely not with your own toys at home.

“So fucking tight…” Chan hissed as his pace sped up to the point he was jackhammering into you. His lips found their way back to your neck and kept mumbling about how you felt around him. So tight, so warm, just right. His teeth nipped your ear lobe, desperate to grab onto something but knowing he couldn’t mark you up too much. “Is this good, baby? Need it harder, faster?”

When you didn’t respond to him, he slowed down a bit and leaned back to stare down at you. His cock twitched when he realized what was happening.

You laid on the bed; eyes glazed over, mouth wide open, cheeks completely flushed. You knew he was asking you a question in Korean, but the words weren’t forming in your head like they usually do. “Aw,” Chan laughed. “Does it feel that good that you forgot Korean?”

Chan let up on the pressure so his hand can snake its way to your lips. You instantly latch on to his fingers and suck. Your tongue brushes around his tips, tasting the leftover residue of yourself from earlier. Your knees unhook from his shoulder and fall on either side of his waist. A whimper leaves you as he removes his fingers from your mouth and travels down to rub your clit. Still keeping his thrust with his brutal pace.

“Ahhh…wait…” You squirmed and your hand went to grab his wrist. Chan noticed how you didn’t pull his hand away despite your pleas. “Chan, p-please--too much.”

He kept using your body. Chan could feel you clamping down around his length. “Sorry,” he breathed out as he felt the pressure in his balls rising. “You’re just, hmmmph, too perfect.”

That’s what did it for you. The fact that he listened to what you mentioned earlier, and his talk. The crash of pleasure that overcame you was intense. Chan shuddered as he felt your wave around him. “Fuck, fuck fuck,” you came with a cry. Your arms wrapped around his neck, trying to ground yourself in any way that you could. You were loud. Nothing could stop the curses that flowed out of you as you held him close against you. Chan wasn’t far behind; “Oh, I-I’m gonna--”

He pulled out and stroked his cock rapidly around his head, painting your stomach with his warm cum. Of all the art museums he visited around the world--this was by far his favorite piece of work.

The room was filled with both of your heavy pants as he laid in your arms. Once he was able to catch his breath, Chan pulled away from your embrace placing the gentlest kiss on your lips. Humming as you kissed him back. He tried to get up, but you were quick to stop him.

“Don’t go…” You pouted. Part of you knew this would be a one-time thing, but another part never wanted this to end. Chan smiled down at you and gave your cheek a quick peck.

“I’m just grabbing a towel to clean you off.”

As he walked off to the bathroom you stared down at the mess on your abdomen. The remnants of the best sex of your life were starting to cake on your skin. It took everything in you to not scoop some up and taste him in your mouth. When Chan returned with a wet cloth, he cleaned you up before plopping onto the bed beside you.

Once you caught your breath, reality set in.

Here you were, all fucked out with a colleague in the same industry. Everything told you to leave. It wasn’t like the two of you were in a relationship. It was a rash decision based on a lot of alcohol and dancing. You started to get up, but Chan was quick to wrap his hand in yours.

“You…you don’t have to go…” Chan shifted to lay on his side and stared down to not meet your eyes. Acting all shy as if he didn’t fuck the lights out of you just moments before. Your heart melted at the sight.

Slinking back into bed, his arms wrapped around you and pulled you into his chest. His cheek pressed against the top of your forehead. You could feel his heartbeat against you and closed your eyes.

“You know,” you sighed. “This was something I definitely didn’t regret.”

“Me ‘neither.”

As the morning rolled around you woke up to Chan still wrapped around you. His soft snores made you smile. There was something surreal about seeing him so at peace that made your heart flutter. Placing a small kiss on his cheek, Chan shifted slightly and groaned as he stretched a bit.

“Mornin’,” He grumbled but held a smile as soon as his eyes landed on you. Chan wasted no time in pulling you into a kiss. His hands sneaking towards your ass to knead your flesh. His excitement is present against your thigh.

"Somebody's eager," You giggle as he pressed closer to you. Chan smirked as he gently rubbed his morning wood against you.

"You can say that."

"Unfortunately--"

Chan grumbled and hid his face in the crook of your neck. "No, don't say that."

"I was just going to say, that I need some water first." It was true. After all the drinks last night, your head was pounding like never before.

"Okay," Chan smiled and got up from bed to put a pair of boxers on. "Stay put, I'll grab you something to eat too."

Minutes passed as you waited in bed. Surprise overtook you as you heard a pan sizzling and the welcoming smell of home-cooking started to flood the dorm. Dawning one of his shirts, you made your way to the kitchen. Chan's back was to you as he manned the stove. You could see how his back rippled with every movement he made.

You couldn't see it, but a smile crept on Chan's face as he felt you wrap your arms around his midriff. "I thought I told you to stay put?"

"I'm not one for taking orders." You laugh as you hook your chin on his shoulder to peer over him. "Besides," Chan stiffened a bit as he felt your lips hover over his ear. "There's something sexy about a man cooking."

"Oh?" He quickly turned off the stove and turned around to face you. Your arms wrap around his neck as he leaned down closer to your face. "And what about your water?"

It was a frenzy of passion as your lips locked with his yet again. Both of you eager to relive last night in the light of sobriety. "Water can wait," you whisper in between kisses.

Chan easily lifted you, placing you on an open counter. Your legs spread to allow him access to be closer to you. The both of you started to mold into one another as the intensity grows. "I should cook for you more often," He grins as he breaks away from the kiss to catch his breath. He lifted his shirt on you slightly so your cunt was exposed.

"Promise?" You teased as he lowered himself down slightly to bring his lips level to your core. Chan enjoyed the way your head leaned back slightly as you felt his hot breath against you.

"Promise."

The both of you were so entranced with what was about to happen, that you didn't hear the door opening. Only the shrilly scream that bounced around the dorm broke you two apart.

You instantly jumped down from the counter as Chan stood upright, finding protection from behind him. Chan tried using his body to shield your half-naked body from the view of a very frightened Felix.

Not that he really needed too.

The younger member held both hands over his eyes. Groceries bags around him, spilling its contents around the floor.

"Felix?" Chan stuttered as he grabbed a kitchen rag to cover up his erection. "W-what are you doing here?"

Chan gestured for you to run back to the room as Felix was still covering his eyes. You had no hesitation, wanting to escape from the embarrassment. AKA your own personal hell.

"I didn't want you eating alone... I was gonna make breakfast."

Author's Note: Here it is! Please let me know what you think. I'm also open to requests, I really want to get back into writing and interacting more on here. If you'd like to be added to my taglist please interact with this post (linked). Bye~

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[sunnystars2023]

Ways BNHA Boys Show their love

Group 2

Synopsis: The ways the boys of BNHA show their love and affection to you.

Characters Included: Izuku Midoriya, Shoto Todoroki, and Tenya Iida.

Group 1/Group 3

🔋👾🌀⭐️🐸⭐️🌀👾🔋👾🌀⭐️🐸⭐️🌀👾🔋

Izuku Midoriya

Midoriya is semi ok with PDA he like people to know that you two are together with out having to say it. He like feeling close to you but he won't kiss you on the lips in public.

Midoriya takes notice of the little things you do and or like. He has his own journal about you. He knows when you've reached your limits and when you need breaks. He knows everything you enjoy from movies to flowers. You guys know each other so well its almost instinctual.

Midoriya is a sweetheart but after his first year at UA he grew some tough skin. Training to be a hero already puts you on edge but Training to be a symbol is harder especially when you're on the line. He doesn't play when it comes to you.

Izuku Midoriya might be a softy at times but when it comes to you, his friends, and Civilians, he's a protecter.

Shoto Todoroki

Todoroki likes to be private so PDA is a no go for him as publicity is a bitch and he’s still Endeavors son. Not that he doesn’t wanna show you off it’s just he doesn’t want a bunch of randos having extra pictures of him much less with you. He makes an exception for hand holding on days where you both need a little extra love. Behind closed doors, thats when he becomes so clingy even just in the dorms and not in your personal rooms.

Todoroki at first isn’t to sure how to be someone’s partner as none of the girls that pursued him never got his attention. The only example he has is Natsuo but he doesn’t ever bring his girlfriend home, but he watched you quietly and would talk to you about what you wanted and what you liked and would listen about topics you grossly know too much about. As time goes on he figures it out, learns what you need and is so sweet but still a little dense.

Todoroki loves to spoil you when he has the chance. When he and Endeavor started to re-kindle their relationship Todoroki accepted a Debit card that is loaded for necessities and such. So if you even whisper of wanting something and he can get it, he’s already got it. He says quote ‘You’re so kind and deserving so why wouldn’t I get it’. Not only is he physically Rich but he also once he gets comfortable with you and the relationship is a Rich lover.

Shoto Todoroki is a learner but a Rich lover so be good to him and he’s good to you.

Tenya Iida

Iida is a strong class leader along side Momo. He is very confident and concentrated on being a good class rep. He like Bakugo HATES PDA as he sees it as A) breaking the rules and B) a breach of your intimate privacy. He will only hold hands if you just absolutely need some affection. He prefers to be touchy behind closed doors.

Iida is strict to his rules even with himself. He tries to keep everything in line. Tries as when it comes to you he will lightly bend the rules for you. If it’s late and you need him, his doors open even past curfew sometimes. Wanna cuddle and end up falling asleep in his bed, he lets you until curfew and brings you to your dorm room. He would bend any rule for you. Bend not break. He is more loyal to you than a dog is to his owner. Iida will not stand for any slander or insults towards you or about you.

Iida is hard working and driven by his peers. He won’t give up and won’t stop working towards his goals so be lucky that you became one of them. He cherishes you and thinks the world of you. He thinks of you as more then just a girlfriend. You’re his partner and Best friend. He helps you with whatever you need. No he won’t give you answers to homework but he will let you borrow his highlighted notes with tips hand written in the margins and go over the assignment without judgment. He also brings you books that he thinks you’d like and writes more notes in the margins for you varying from sweet I love yous to pointed out things that reminded him of you.

Tenya Iida is a smart lover, loyal companion, and a hard-worker. He is as good as gold so take care of him.

🔋👾🌀⭐️🐸⭐️🌀👾🔋👾🌀⭐️🐸⭐️🌀👾🔋

Masterlist <- here

Thank you sm for reading! Check out other parts for more characters! If you want more content follow my wattpad @sunnystars2023!

[goddessfloresz]

Her Recovery p1.

ONESHOT ❦︎ (very) [OC] FemReader x Larissa Weems

°° Reader is named Florere Dulcie since I dislike using Y/N when writing. 😓

" 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚎 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚎. 𝚆𝚑𝚘 𝚠𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍'𝚟𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚜𝚑𝚎'𝚜 𝚐𝚊𝚢? "

Being part of the Nevermore Family has unleashed something inside of you. The fear of being judged for expressing yourself was washed away once you had taken a step into the academy. For the first time in your life during your early-thirty's, you felt the freedom of expression you had ever so craved for. Being a professor means having the advantage of wearing anything that came into mind, of course it would need to be appropriate for teaching.

It took some time for you to adjust into Nevermore. The first week was quite a hassle since you already had a lot in your hands.. To moving in the teachers dorms, to organizing your class schedule, to designing your classroom, to decide what lessons you would be teaching for the curriculum, gosh there was too many to even decide! Welcome to the career you chose, I guess.. If only you weren't five foot two tall then you would've pursued modeling that kept calling out for your name. And here you are pursuing the job of teaching, to be able to at least inspire youngsters. But the main reason was.. you missed your daughter. You missed taking care of her, missing the presence of a child. In fact, you never thrown out a single picture of your daughter. Why couldn't you call your ex-husband if you're child-deprived? You couldn't, of course. You left your child's life without oh so suddenly.. and probably you were the villain in their eyes, so why would you bother to even try? Having this motherly instinct led you to Nevermore Academy to teach with passion. No wonder the students had immediately added you to their favorites list.

..Feeling as if Nevermore was your home.

You were plain, nothing special looked on you, you were 'normal' when you first set foot into Nevermore for the job interview. The observant principal took notice of how you drastically changed into this 'fashionista' that the staff and students had called you, because of basically how you had started to literally turn Nevermore into your fashion show. There was not a single day that you didn't capture anyone's attention..

There was just something about printed leopard clothing that set your heart ablaze, it was as if it was made just for you to wear. Especially the fur coats that you'd always love to wear during seasonal winters. Not to mention, you'd always have an eye for vintage fashion. You even made sure your hair had the style of Hedy Lamarr, an iconic Hollywood actress. It took almost six months of working in Nevermore to bring this celebrity or rather.. outcast out of you.

..And that made Larissa feel nothing more than proud of you because of your improvement.

Compliments never failed to make you flattered no matter how many times you've had received it from your students and faculty staff. It has been six months working under Nevermore, and it already feels like you know this place like the palm of your hand. This Academy was full of secrets waiting for their discovery and you were more than proud to figure out just that. But working for Nevermore also has its ups and downs.. For example; The murder of Rowan, one of the Academy's students. Gosh.. it never failed to give your skin goosebumps just from the thought of it. You were always late by the news of on-going happenings inside the school grounds, only being updated when your co-workers talk about certain topics. Plus, the fact that Wednesday Addams never failed to make the principal's blood boil.

Just as you thought everything chaotic was dying down, you were so wrong.

..Here you are, visiting Principal Weems's quarters in Jericho's Hospital for the third time in a week. Praying to the deities that she'll recover from the hell she just had experienced. If only that darn Marilyn Thornhill was caught earlier. You were worried like it was the end of the world when you had miraculously arrived just on time because of some rising voices inside the botany teacher's room. Greeted by the fact that the Principal's mouth was foaming, with her body fully paralyzed from whatever injected serum was stabbed on her.

If only.. if only you were not the type of woman who would shy away from their love interest. Then you would've spent more time with the apple of your eyes..

It as was if you regretted every single decision you made to avoid Larissa in any way because you simply had feelings for her. The whole semester was on pause because of this certain situation.. like how the whole academy stopped functioning for a certain while. Just as if you were sulking the fact of your awful decisions in life, blaming yourself in every possible way. You stopped on your tracks when the door to the principal's hospital room was half open. Taking a small peek before completely opening it, you couldn't believe your eyes that your co-workers had arrived and gathered before you.

Your eyes widen a bit when you heard a particular voice, none other than belonging to Principal Weems herself. Talking amongst the crowd almost sorroundings her bed.. Thank the heavens above for being able to hear your goddess's voice once again!

" Ah, Miss Florere, you've arrived just in time! " One of your co-workers welcomed your arrival with open arms. All heads turning unto you as you stood frozen still unto the door frame, including the head of a particular blonde. Your eyes immediately landing on eachother, taking note of her pale and natural look.. " You're more than welcome to come in, Miss 'Dulcie'. " The maiden name of your mother immediately snapped you back unto reality. You almost totally forgot that you had changed your complete identity when you decided to use your mother's maiden name than use the 'Gustavo' name. And gosh.. the way Larissa almost held you in chokehold by simply tapping her tongue to pronounce your name. This woman will surely be the death of you someday..

" Of course.. " you replied with a stutter as the blush on your cheeks grew and stepped a foot inside as you closed the door from behind. The atmosphere was comfortable and cheerful, despite the gloomy background still being there. But set that aside, everyone was here for the principal's quick recovery after all. It honestly surprised you because you almost saw her die before your eyes..

This certain situation made you feel at ease and relief now that Larissa's health has been stabilized.

Watching everyone talk comfortably to Principal Weems made you unable to contain that smile. Making your heart swell as you listened attentively on their conversations. " Regarding the second semester, please notify the students that it'll be postponed until further notice. We must prioritize the students mental health recovery from everything that has happened within the school grounds. " Her strong British accent quickly making anyone listen inside the room. Gosh.. this woman had just woken up from slumber and already thought about a strategy regarding the schools administrations? What is she even doing during her sleep, work? But not to mention, it was still pretty impressive. As expected from Principal Weems herself..

" Oh set the responsibilities aside, Principal Weems! Please.. focus on your recovery also. " A sentence that made almost everyone nodding their head, " Not to mention.. Miss Florere here got everything under control when you were gone. " Your co-worker said with a smile as all eyes were on you for the credits. You couldn't help but giggle slightly before replying, " Oh please.. Its not much of a big deal. I just made sure to send each of the student's parents some letter regarding the incident. Explaining everything they needed to know and give some reassurances on their child's education inside Nevermore Academy.. " You couldn't help but glance at Larissa who seems to have a pleasing smile and seeming to notice the way her tense body relaxed.

" Not to mention, Miss Florere here made sure to bring you some flowers everyday. "

" It's the least I could do.. " You couldn't help but mutter shyly as you lowered your gaze on all the credits you've received. Unknowingly that all of the little things were noticed by the staff and we're exposed to the Principal itself. Larissa couldn't help but grow her smile more, seemingly applauding you silently as you felt her gaze bore unto you. But her gaze quickly returned when conversations seem to spark again.. and there you were behind the crowd, flattered by all the credits you had received.

As time passes by, the nurse had came in the room to remind the dear visitors about the curfew regarding visiting hours. Which made that gloomy atmosphere somehow seep in upon the reminder.. It was honestly a hard thought that you would be leaving this woman all alone for the sake of recovery. After few more conversations, the staff had decided it would be best to leave earlier to avoid some scolding from the medical health workers. You were the last to leave.. making you stop on your tracks once again when you heard Larissa's voice from behind.

" Professor Dulcie.. for a moment? " The only woman who called you by your mother's maiden name.

" Yes? " You turned around, breath immediately hitching as you made eye contact with her beautiful blue orbs.

" Would you fetch me my laptop? And perhaps other things like.. anything that could cure my boredom during my recovery. Could you bring my items tomorrow evening? " Her voice ever so gentle and soft, making you almost immediately melt on the spot.

" Of course.. anything for you, Principal Weems. " The last sentence was totally unplanned, it came out of your mouth automatically. Was this the effect by being under her gaze?

In which, Larissa responded with a giggle. Making your eyes slightly widen from realization of what you had just said. Gosh you are more than exposing yourself! But my gosh.. her giggle was beautiful too, almost making you weak on your knees. You wished you could hear it everyday..

" I'll take note of that, Professor. " She replied with that pearly whites of hers.

That certain interaction replayed in your head, because you were sure that her reply had a hint of playfulness. Or where you just being delusional? But oh well.. this was it. The start of getting to know Larissa, and aim for establishing a friendship with her. After all that happened in a blink of an eye? That you almost lost the source of your heart beat? You were now firm with your decision to establish a friendship with the Principal of Nevermore Academy. Or possibly.. even more than friends.

In fact, you couldn't sleep last night. Larissa's reply kept ringing into your head like a bell.. it was the reason behind your sleepless night. You were certainly aware that you were acting like a complete teenager girl fan girling over some 'stupid' crush. But oh dearest Larissa was more than 'just a crush'. She was your muse, your goddess.. you are so in love. And you aren't denying it anymore.

You carefully gathered everything essential unto the desk of the principal. Her laptop, her documents, her notebook and pen, the clothes and hairpins she needed once she got fully healed, her hygiene kit, and.. her signature red lipstick? Of course, you thought that it would be better to bring it. Since you've barely seen her never wear the red lipstick, thinking that every woman has her comfort, and the red lipstick was exactly what you think Larissa needed. You couldn't help but feel something was missing.. but you were also sure you've gotten everything important. You shrugged that thought off immediately when you've checked every stuff needed, and packed it into this large leather bag of yours. You wouldn't be bothered if you left it into the possession of Larissa. As you said.. you would do anything for this woman.

•••

The Principal's face lit up once you've finally showed up into the hospital quarters.

" I've got everything. " You tried not show how nervous you actually were. Because you were unsure if you even got the essential things she requested and needed.

" Thank you so much, dear. " You couldn't help but blush at the pet name, as you basically helped set up the laptop on her bed desk. Seeming to notice that she was way more lively than usual.. it seems like she's recovering real well. Which made you unable to hide your smile at that thought, because that's exactly what you were wishing for.

As silence crept in, you hesitated for a moment to start a conversation as Larissa was now focused on turning on her laptop. Staring at her signature red lipstick inside the bag, you were practically fighting demons inside of you to make such a decision that took so much courage..

" I don't think the principal would survive without her red lipstick.. " You cracked a joke as you showed her, her signature red lipstick. Larissa couldn't help but raise a brow as she looked at you, but the moment she layed eyes on her lipstick she couldn't help but smile ear to ear.

" Hm? How did you know? " The blonde replied to your joke with a giggle, seeming to ride with your joke. You couldn't help but giggle in reply too, handing her the red lipstick as the blush on your cheeks grew.

" My dear professor.. I can't apply my lipstick without a without a mirror. " Larissa said as she opened her lipstick, her gaze running back to you. " Oh right! I think I got it..- Oh. " You immediately turned around to clutter inside the bag over nothing. So that's what you were missing, a mirror.

" I-I'm sorry, Principal Weems.. I don't think I have brought any- "

" Can you help me put it on? "

" ..What? "

" What I meant is.. May you please kindly help me apply the lipstick, Professor? "

𝙰/𝙽: Soo, this chapter is almost inspired by a fanfiction I've red in AO3, I've sadly forgotten the title and name of the author.. Hope you enjoyed this one! Honestly speaking; I discontinued this due to academics work load.. it was supposed to be a full available book in Wattpad. And I can't find the right time to do it sadly.

[monstersdownthepath]

Herald of Lissala: Kurshu the Undying

CR 15

Lawful Evil Large Outsider

Adventure Path: Shattered Star: Into the Nightmare Rift, pg. 88-89

"Lissala?" I hear some of you ask in confusion, "who's Lissala? I've never heard of her!" And as I turn from the chalkboard to explain, the unfortunate who asked is teleported before the decrepit and mummified Kurshu to receive a fate worse than any I could bestow: an in-depth history lesson of an empire which survived for thousands of years before being struck down by an apocalypse. I speak, of course, of ancient Thassilon--the very same empire ruled by the archmages known as the Runelords--of which Lissala was the chief deity. When Thassilon was destroyed by Earthfall, so too was Lissala's faith, an organization of millions reduced to a fraction of its glory in mere moments, which inevitably dwindled until basically nothing was left. Lissala was not killed by this event (though many believe she was), but faded into total obscurity on Golarion, leaving behind countless markers upon history and a great many of her divine creations, Kurshu included.

Even in the modern day, there are very few beings in existence who even know about Lissala, let alone worship her, but nevertheless there are some who still fervently hold onto their faith that she may one day return, chief among them Kurshu herself and the Rune Giants who remain slavishly devoted to both Lissala and the dwindling Runelords. Now and then a true Cleric of Lissala will rise up and show actual divine power, but it's a coin flip as to whether they've truly forged a connection with the lost Thassilonian deity or are being deceived by some other entity... and if they ARE, then they have Hell to pay when Kurshu tracks them down to investigate.

Having spent many thousands of years wandering Golarion and the Great Beyond in the hopes of finding traces of Lissala's presence to soothe her (which the book hearbreakingly describes as "similar to a widower smelling his dead wife's clothes in the hopes of sparking a lost memory"), Kurshu has grown to possess a paradoxical resentment for her deity and creator for abandoning her to wallow among the filth and ruin left in the wake of Thassilon's fall. Though she remains devoted, this devotion is described in a way that almost feels like a drug addiction than a true bond, with every part of Kurshu screaming for any sign of her goddess even while she's is painfully aware of how pitiful it's making her and how much she desires to simply stop and find something else. She hates Lissala. She loves Lissala. She resents her, and yet is fully aware she would gladly crawl back into her master's lap if it meant never again feeling the longing she does now. She is pitiful, but she despises the idea of being pitied. Do not bring up how relieved she looks when a Cleric of Lissala shows true promise, or when she finds some artifact or place which resonates with the power of the lost goddess.

While many Heralds possess duties they're expected to perform, Kurshu is a free agent, able to pursue her own goals. These goals continuously revolve around Lissala and Thassilon, but she is free to pursue them with her endless time, pausing only occasionally for a snack break, but we'll get to THAT in a moment. Unlike other Heralds, Kurshu has no goddess to direct her and is free to respond to the summons or prayers of ANY being that invokes her regardless of alignment should see use in it. She is also able to track down anyone wishing to learn more of Thassilon and its rune magic to teach them, and can actually replace the target of a Greater Planar Ally spell being cast by a Lawful Evil-aligned caster if they're not careful in how they word their requests for knowledge. Guarded by her own obscurity, most beings don't know just who or what they're dealing with until it's far too late, and she's seized control of them. But what will she do once she has someone on a leash? Let's find out...

Kurshu has two primary motivations in any encounter: survive first, and locate more Thassalonian lore after. To aid in her survival, she often has a menagerie of Outsiders of varying alignments and strengths at her beck and call, a small army she is prompted to stock with subject hovering between CR 8 and 10 due to her horrific hunger. You see, without Lissala's divine power flowing into her, Kurshu suffers from Divine Separation, an affliction which imposes 1 negative level every day she goes without devouring the corpse of an Outsider (including Native Outsiders; tieflings and aasimar beware!), which often means that--if she's trying to be economical with her livestock--she's encountered with anywhere between 2 and 6 negative levels to sap her otherwise potent skills.

Further confounding the issue is the fact that she refuses to consume Lawful Evil Outsiders on principal (but will if she's desperate), AND that in order to alleviate her hunger, the consumed victim must have at least 8 Hit Dice; she cannot simply feed upon Quasits to stave off her decay, she must at the very least be slaying creatures like Succubi, Choral Angels, and Pelagastr, creatures which can actually fight back against her. Every HD from a consumed Outsider instantly removes an equal number of negative levels, meaning she can "waste" her food by eating Outsiders with too many HD, something she's painfully aware of and which can often cause her to wait a little longer than advisable between feedings, weakening her if her enemies are trying to hunt her down. Similarly, if she knows she's being hunted she may burn through her supply faster than she intends trying to keep herself at full strength, forcing her into a desperate catch-22 as she runs out of minions to slow her adversaries down.

But how does she keep this army of hers in check? Limited Wish. Unlike many monster entries where Limited Wish is simply a blank check, the book goes into a lot of detail about how Kurshu manipulates this powerful spark of divine magic she retains and can use, for free, 3 times a day. She primarily uses it as Charm Monster to snare the minds of her prey, keeping them docile and willing to listen to her for two weeks per casting, weakening them with a Wished up Mind Fog if need be, though she can also save a wish casting by instead heightening her spells with a 3/day Power Surge, a swift action she can invoke to raise the save DC of the next spell she casts by +2.

In case you thought she only had her wishes available, this is far from the truth. She has a LONG list of 3/day spells available to her, including but not limited to Cure Serious Wounds, Hold Person, Stinking Cloud, and Slow, with simple but potent offensive options like Fireball, Lightning Bolt, and the reliable Vampiric Touch. She can counter enemy tricks with Dispel Magic and defend herself or a valuable ally with Displacement, and of course she can use all of these while flying*, leaving her foes to tangle with her ground-bound allies while she rains debuffs, damage, and debilitation upon them.

*NOTE: There's an error in her Archives of Nethys sheet; she's supposed to have a 60ft Fly speed (Good) maneuverability!

The book amusingly notes that her tendency to have a flock of Chaotic Outsiders with her, and her own withered appearance, causes many of her enemies to waste powerful anti-Chaos or anti-Undead spells upon her in the mistaken belief she is also some minion of chaos or undeath, often giving her just enough time to retaliate with a powerful blow of her own. In especially dramatic cases, someone may rush up and hit her with a powerful Cure Wounds or Heal spell in the hopes of ending her, only to watch her HP refill and invite her retaliation.

She's no melee fighter and prefers to keep at a distance for fear of death, but the token melee abilities she has are quite potent: her lashing tail can slam victims for 1d8+2 damage, then Grab and constrict them for 1d8+5 damage each round until they either escape or succumb to whatever spell she prepares to melt their brains with via Limited Wish (such as the crushing, no-save-allowed Geas, a spell that LW allows her to cast as a standard action!). And speaking of brain-melting, I'm sure there's a very select audience reading this that will enjoy knowing the snake woman can also shave 1d4 Intelligence off any creature she strikes with either of her two slam attacks (1d8+5 on their own), allowing her to literally beat someone stupid.

Defensively, Kurshu is a tank to a degree matched by few other casting-focused Heralds. 30 AC, DR 10 that's only bypassed by a magical cold iron weapon, and a decent 26 SR to fizzle most spells being cast by the creatures she's hoping to face. She's also got 30 Resistance to (almost) every element but Force, severely cutting down on any attempt to damage her with elemental power... unless that power is Acid damage, which not only does she have no resistance to, but is the only damage type that shuts off her Regeneration 5, an ability she will take full advantage of by keeping out of reach or even teleporting away to heal up.

Kurshu does not wish to fight to the death, and will use her 3/day Greater Teleport or Plane Shift to escape any encounter that begins to turn against her, and trying to counter that with Dimensional Anchor or similar may see her using Limited Wish to break the effect without risking a dispel check failure... or simply teleport her enemies away instead of herself. "Wait, that's not a spell effect in Pathfinder!" To which I smile and point at the fourth line in Limited Wish: "Produce any other effect whose power level is in line with the above effects, such as a single creature automatically hitting on its next attack or taking a -7 penalty on its next saving throw." The example lines on LM's spell card are merely to show the power level it can manage, its actual effect can be anything that roughly matches a 6th level Wizard or Sorcerer spell in terms of power, which a hostile Dimension Door effect to send multiple people hundreds of feet away falls into. Even if she can't get the full party with it, splitting them enough to let her either pick off one or two key members or simply flee the combat is a good enough use in her eyes.

Having spent millennia avoiding her own death with a fear matched only by mortals, Kurshu has no end to emergency options. As mentioned, she can Greater Teleport or Plane Shift away from conflicts she wants no part of up to 3/day. In addition, she has both Craft Wondrous Item and Scribe Scroll, but can combine them with her unique Spell-Like Crafting, allowing her to use her spell-like abilities to meet the prerequisites when creating magic items, something that would normally prevent her from having three or four Limited Wishes on her belt waiting for her personal supply to run out. The same can be said for her transport spells, or scrolls of Tongues (which she can use at-will), Stinking Cloud, or Slow. Such valuable items also act as potent bribes to make other Lawful creatures more likely to serve her by their own free will, if she doesn't simply wish up a pile of valuables to pay them.

Kurshu can be a frightening and powerful foe, even moreso than most other Heralds due to the lack of divine restriction she operates under. She does not need to be invited into a situation by Lissala's worshipers, she can simply show up of her own free will with a small army of fiends, monitors, and celestials at her beck and call, and now everyone simply has to deal with her presence and whatever nonsense her ensorcelled "allies" are getting up to. Why is she here? That's probably the true mystery of the adventure, and solving it brings the party one step closer to making her leave without provoking her potentially apocalyptic wrath.

You can read more about her here.

[7grandmel]

Rip of the Week: 01/07/2024

KNUCKLES (Smaragdwächter)

Season 8 No Album Release (Read More) Carnival Night Zone (Act 2) (Nov 3, 1993 prototype) - Sonic the Hedgehog 3 & Knuckles

Ripped by Madinstance

I pondered long and hard about this post, of what rip to make it about - I'm sort of back in the groove of things after my break, and I'm happy to see people are enjoying the graudally-increasing trickle of variety posts already, but I also feel as if I'm still regaining my footing in how to pick these rips for the blog. Alas, amidst all the requests and the all-time classics, I do inevitably hold recency bias close to my heart - bias you've already seen with rips like Last Freight-train Night, and that rears its head once again with KNUCKLES (Smaragdwächter). Because no matter what happens to me or the blog, I am but merely a Sonic fan, an Undertale enjoyer, and an absolute CONNOISSEUR for Madinstance's work. The madlad's done it again.

Like, look - I've featured the guy so many times before, I've featured Undertale music on here so many times more than even that, blah blah, blah blah...can you sincerely blame me for picking this one? Madinstance has been featured on here plenty for their incredible arrangements like M-O-O-G City and Thwâmpröck Desert, and I've always sort of taken them as the kind of ripper who puts their heart and soul into rips of games and music that they genuinely just care tons about, most evident with their Minecraft tributes like Fell From a High Place (Reprise). But lately it feels as if that view may have been wrong - or Madinstance is just growing as a ripper to where they're becoming willing to take on any arranging project so long as it sounds cool. Honestly though, I can't blame them with a concept as sick as this - meshing together prototype Carnival music from a Genesis Sonic game with Undertale boss music is the kind of lunatic concept that I don't know how one comes up with but also wouldn't be able to help myself to pursue.

There have been a lot of times where I've worried that I've covered too *much* Undertale music for the blog...but the more I sit on it, the more I realize just how core Undertale's music is to both SiIva's viewers and its rippers. Undertale blew up just a short few months before the SiIvaGunner channel itself did, and its fans have thus grown in almost direct parallel with SiIvaGunner's own fans - and on top of that, Toby Fox is the exact kind of online meme freak that SiIvaGunner itself attracts the most. Is it any surprise that we've had banging Undertale arrangements on SiIva like Hoopache, SUNGORE, and indeed Madinstance's very own Fell From a High Place (Reprise), since the very beginning of the channel, from just about every one of the team's rippers? Undertale is endlessly beloved, and moreover - endlessly versatile for arrangements, its leitmotifs and melodies so well known as to becoming a series of online anthems all in their own rights.

Compared to the more popular tunes like Megalovania and Death By Glamour, it feels as if ASGORE doesn't get as much attention from remixers and rippers. And perhaps that was part of what made me fall head over heels in love with KNUCKLES (Smaragdwächter) right from the moment go - it shows such a profound respect and understanding for not just the original ASGORE theme, but the iconic Bergentrückung prelude that introduces the battle, here weaving the two together damn seamlessly in the rip's intro. It's immensely impressive just how atmospheric and intense the rip still sounds despite, again, it's baseline track being the borderline juvenile carnival music used in Sonic 3's recently-unearthed prototype versions, a series of cheerful clapping samples introducing the track yet never overriding the emotional sincerity of the melody leading the rip. I feel like the emotion in large part also just comes from how fucking cool of a sound Sonic 3's music in general has, a lead synth that sounds unlike anything else on the genesis playing a sort of melodic back-and-fourth with a second synth lead that sounds just as distinct yet far more chipper and bright, almost reminding me of something from Rivals of Aether...? The back-and-fourth feel is an amazing touch either way, is the point!

KNUCKLES (Smaragdwächter)'s final touch, of course, comes toward the finale, the section in which the original ASGORE battle theme takes a step back from its intensity to reflect, a calm in the midst of the storm. Madinstance brilliantly uses this interlude to throw a complete curveball that still fits the arrangement perfectly: using samples and sounds from the *finalized* Carnival Night Zone theme, the one created by Michael Jackson's soundteam, and featuring that distinct glass shattering sample from Jam. I talk about escalation in rips a fair bit on here, but it wasn't as it the rip was in any need of it here anyway given how amazing the arrangement already was. It's just the sort of thing that pushes the rip from great to godlike, the kind of touch you'd mainly expect to see from a Sonic the Hedgehog superfan committed to their rip, akin to what MtH did with Youkoso Twinkle Park e. But again - perhaps, somehow, I've underestimated just how far Madinstance will go once they've landed on a concept they truly click with. Season 8 may well be the silly season in many ways, but it's all too clear that each one of the team's rippers are growing more powerful by the day.

[thehanalia]

I am confident, what about you?

Hey there, lovelies! Today's entry is all about confidence—something I've been thinking a lot about lately. So grab a cup of tea, cozy up, and let's dive into the inner workings of my mind.

You know, confidence isn't something that just magically appears overnight. It's more like a journey—a rollercoaster ride of highs and lows, twists and turns, and moments of pure exhilaration mixed with a healthy dose of self-doubt.

But here's the thing—I've come to realize that confidence isn't about having it all figured out or never feeling afraid. It's about embracing the uncertainty, stepping outside of your comfort zone, and taking that leap of faith, even when your knees are shaking and your heart is racing.

Lately, I've been challenging myself to do things that scare me a little (okay, maybe a lot). Whether it's speaking up in a meeting, rocking a bold new hairstyle, or pursuing a passion project that's been sitting on the back burner for far too long, I've been pushing myself to embrace the discomfort and lean into the unknown.

And you know what? It's been pretty damn liberating! Sure, there have been moments of self-doubt and anxiety along the way, but there have also been moments of pure wonder—moments where I've surprised myself with what I'm capable of, moments where I've felt truly alive and unstoppable.

So here's to embracing the messy, beautiful journey of building confidence—one shaky step at a time. Here's to owning our worth, celebrating our victories (no matter how small), and showing up as our most authentic selves, flaws and all.

Until next time, babes. Keep shining bright, and remember—you've got this.

PS.

My etsy shop has been suspended, I really wanted you guys to access my digital planners and now, I have decided to make my own shop. Keep in the lookout.

Another update; My lovely friend, Hana (If you have been following for a while, yes its her). She has created a Youtube channel for all those girlies that want to look like better versions of themselves. Give her love :kiss -> Hana's Youtube

Stay safe and stay hot...

With Love, Sophia

[streamdotpng]

Will we get to see any more Tara/Enid?

Maybe where Tara isn't some sort of consolation prize to Enid if she doesn't get together with Wednesday

I feel like we see a lot of Wednesday pushing Enid away because she's super repressed and can't handle feelings, and then being ultimately forgiven in the end for doing so..but life doesn't always work like that

Sometimes shit like that leaves scars. It hurts to have someone you love and care about suddenly freezing you out. And it doesn't always matter if you reconcile because in the back of your mind, you're going to wait for the other shoe to drop.

When will this get to be too much again? I wasn't enough for you to stay the first time...am I too much? Too little? Or just not right?

It fucking sucks.

But Tara can love boldly; She's headstrong and passionate. Yes, she's wary of others and protective of her little family, but once Enid gets past those walls, it's like she was always part of their lives. She's charmed by the fiery personality and the nerdiness she sees when Tara gets swept away by a movie. Fuck..Enid finds it incredibly attractive how passionate Tara is about film (and how Tara can be a little mean sometimes). With Tara, there was almost no hesitation when she starting pursuing the werewolf, y'know other than making sure she wasn't secretly another Ghostface. She made her intentions known and didn't hide it, something that definitely flustered the blonde.

In this, I picture Tara just a tiny bit older than Enid. Definitely not enough to be alarming, though, mostly just for Enid to say she has a hot older girlfriend, and then here come this 5' 1 slip of a girl

i didn't expect a whole ass essay but this is a pleasant surprise.

Totally tho! like yes you reap what you sow. Sometimes, people will keep chasing for their own reasons but sometimes, some people are tired of being the only one trying

And enid? Enid tries alot, she tries for her family, she tries for ajax, she tries reach out and she tries to make what they have work.

She understands her roomie's reasons, she truly does! but maybe they weren't meant to be in that kind of relationship. Maybe their ship wasn't meant to sail when there is only one doing maintenance.

Maybe when Enid looks at Tara months later, she'll note the dimple for someone else. Maybe in late nights, she'll see freckles so similar that its like she's looking at somebody from before. Maybe Enid will hold the smaller girl in her arms and think, she's warmer than usual.

But eventually, Enid will look at that dimpled smile and wonder what cheeky show did Tara watch for her to look like that. Eventually she'll trace new stars in a different sky as she brushes a thumb against Tara's cheek. Eventually, she'll remember how Tara never fails to have goosebumps whenever Enid touches her.

Eventually, she'll stop loving wednesday as much as she did when they were together and she had to accept that.

anyways, random word vomit over, i think enid/tara are cute and i can't believe more people are getting into it

I also think that Enid deserves to be chased instead of the chaser :)

[sparrow-mask22]

The Umbrella Academy Story of The Mothers (6/8) umbrella edition: Nayeon

(Please keep in mind that because they never say the name of Ben's mother in the show or on the wiki, I made the name up. And this also applies to the Sparrow timeline as well)

October 1, 1989. Seoul, South Korea.

Nayeon Chay (Eastern spelling: Chae Na-yeon) was a carefree teenager, enjoying her youth to the fullest. She was on the subway, riding with her boyfriend, Minho. They were sitting in the middle of the train, not bothering anyone, just being young and in love. The train lurched forward, throwing them both against each other, eliciting a giggle from Nayeon. She quickly recovered herself, brushing a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

The subway car was crowded, as usual, but Nayeon didn't mind the close quarters. She leaned into Minho, nuzzling her face against his shoulder. He put his arm around her, pulling her close, their bodies pressed together. They were lost in their own little world, oblivious to the chaos and commotion around them.

Nayeon was trained in noble arts such as, flower arrangements, calligraphy, and tea ceremonies. She had great aspirations to go to college abroad in Costa Rica to study these arts in depth. Her parents were very supportive of her dreams and encouraged her to follow her heart.

As the subway car rattled along, a strange sense of foreboding crept into the back of Nayeon's mind. The air felt thick and heavy, and she couldn't shake off the feeling that something was amiss. She glanced around, but everyone else seemed oblivious to the tension that had settled over the car. Her heart raced as she fought the urge to ask Minho if he noticed anything out of the ordinary.

The train screeched to a halt, throwing them both forward in their seats. Nayeon gasped, her heart racing even faster. "What's going on?" she asked, her voice trembling. Minho looked around, confusion written all over his face. "I don't know," he said, his voice shaking.

"Rush hour's always like this," a man sitting nearby offered in halting English. He was Japanese, Nayeon could tell by his features. "Just ignore them. They'll get us where we're going soon enough."

Nayeon nodded, trying to reassure herself. Minho glanced at her, then back at the man, before leaning back against the seat. The train jerked forward again, and the crowd began to disperse, moving to leave the car. Nayeon and Minho stood up, following the flow of bodies, and made their way to the exit. As they stepped onto the platform, she could feel the weight of the station pressing down on her. The air was thick with an almost palpable sense of foreboding.

"Are you sure you want to go to Costa Rica?" Minho asked her suddenly, concern etched into his features. "What if something happens to you while you're there? Your parents would never forgive me."

Nayeon was taken aback by his sudden change in tone. "What do you mean?" she asked, confusion clouding her thoughts. "Why would you say that?"

Minho hesitated, his gaze darting around the platform before meeting her eyes again. "I've been feeling... uneasy about it lately," he admitted. "I don't want anything to happen to you, Nayeon. You're too important to me."

Nayeon bit her lip, struggling to understand why Minho was acting so strangely. She'd never considered not going to Costa Rica. It was her dream, her passion. She wanted to study and learn from the best teachers in the world. "But Minho, I've always wanted to go there. It's my chance to really pursue what I love. Don't you want me to be happy?"

Minho looked away, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed. "Of course I do, Nayeon. It's just... I don't want to lose you. I can't imagine my life without you." He reached out and took her hand in his, his grip tightening.

"Like the grilled squid we had last night, our lives have been intertwined since the beginning, Nayeon," Minho said, his voice tinged with sadness. "And just like how the squid loses its identity when it's grilled, I feel like I'm losing a part of myself if you leave."

Nayeon bit her lip, feeling the weight of Minho's words press down on her. "But Minho, I need to go. It's my chance to become the dancer I've always wanted to be. You know that."

He looked into her eyes, his expression pained. "I know, Nayeon. I just... I can't help feeling like I'm losing you. Like the squid that gets grilled and loses its identity. It's selfish of me, I know. But I can't help it."

Nayeon studied Minho's face, her heart aching for him. She knew how much he loved her, how much he supported her dreams. But she also knew that she couldn't abandon her own aspirations for his sake. "I'll be careful, Minho," she said softly. "I promise to come back to you. And I'll always be your Nayeon, no matter where I-" and then the twelfth hour of the day struck, and the ground beneath her shifted, the world tilting on its axis.

Nayeon felt her heart skip a beat as she registered the sound of Minho's voice. The world around her seemed to slow down, as if time itself was conspiring to grant her a moment of clarity. She looked into Minho's eyes, and in that brief instant, she knew. She was pregnant. Not just pregnant, but nine months pregnant, ready to give birth. The weight of the knowledge pressed down on her, heavy and inescapable.

"Nayeon!? Nayeon!? Are you alright!?" Minho's panicked voice cut through the air as he rushed to her side. The world around them seemed to fade into the background, the only thing that mattered was the woman before him. She was pale, clutching her stomach, her eyes wide with shock and fear. He reached out, his hands trembling as he gently touched her cheek. "Nayeon, what's wrong?"

Nayeon's breath came out in ragged gasps as the pain coursed through her, a white-hot fire licking at her insides. Minho's face, mere inches from hers, was a mask of fear and confusion. She tried to speak, to tell him what was happening, but all that came out was a keening wail. The world around them seemed to fade into the background, the only thing that mattered was the overwhelming need to push, to expel this alien presence that had taken up residence within her.

Other women on the train began swarming around Nayeon and Minho, offering their help, but Nayeon barely registered their presence. All she could focus on was the pain, the burning sensation in her lower back, the tightening of her abdomen. Minho held her close, his face etched with worry as he whispered words of encouragement in her ear. The train lurched forward, picking up speed as it raced towards the next station. Time seemed to stand still as Nayeon fought against the overwhelming urge to push, to give in to the primal instincts that were taking over her body.

Some of the women on the train had already given birth, and they began to offer Nayeon their words of wisdom, their own personal stories of survival. They told her to focus on her breathing, to find a rhythm that would help her push through the pain. As the train sped towards the hospital, Nayeon's water broke, sending a gush of warm fluid down her legs. Minho looked on, terrified and helpless, as his love fought for their child's life.

The pain intensified with each passing moment, and Nayeon felt as if her body was being torn apart. She knew that she had to push, that she had to give birth to their child, no matter what the cost. The women on the train coached her, their voices a soothing balm against the fire raging inside her. They helped her shift into positions that would make it easier to deliver her baby, their hands gentle but firm as they guided her through the ordeal.

Minho was by her side the entire time, his eyes never leaving her face. He wiped the sweat from her brow, kissed her forehead, and whispered words of love and encouragement in her ear. She could feel his heart racing against her own, their bodies moving in sync as they fought against the relentless waves of pain.

The pain seemed to reach a crescendo, and with a primal scream, Nayeon pushed with all her might. The train lurched forward, the motion forcing her body into an even deeper contraction. Minho held her close, his arms trembling from the effort, his own breath coming in ragged gasps. She felt a burning sensation between her legs, and with one final push, their child slid free from her body.

"It’s a boy!" one of the women on the train exclaimed, holding the newborn up for Nayeon to see. Minho's face broke into a relieved smile as he gazed down at their child, tears streaming down his cheeks. The boy let out a weak wail, his tiny fists clenched as if already fighting for his place in the world. Nayeon reached out, her fingers trembling as she touched her son's soft, downy hair.

The women on the train continued to buzz around them, offering congratulations and advice. They wrapped the baby in a blanket they had brought along and helped Nayeon into a more comfortable position. Minho, meanwhile, was still holding her close, his arms trembling with relief and exhaustion. He leaned in to kiss her forehead, his lips trembling as he whispered, "You did it. You're a hero."

Nayeon looked down at her son, tears streaming down her face. She couldn't believe it: they had made it. They were both alive. She remembered the fear, the pain, the desperation of those past few hours, and it all seemed like a nightmare now. Minho held her close, his heart still racing from the ordeal, his face etched with a mixture of relief and disbelief.

She gazed up at Minho, her eyes filled with wonder and love. He looked back at her, his own eyes shining with tears of joy and relief. They held each other's gaze for what felt like an eternity, their hearts still racing from the ordeal, their bodies exhausted but alive. Around them, the women on the train continued to coo over the newborn, marveling at his resilience and their own shared triumph.

Nayeon cradled her newborn son in her arms, her heart swelling with love and pride. Minho sat beside her, his eyes never leaving their child as he ran a trembling hand through his sweat-dampened hair. The women on the train continued to coo over the baby, offering words of wisdom and advice, their presence a comforting reminder that they were not alone in this journey.

Her heart swelled with love as she gently tickled the edges of her son's soft, round belly (where the portal is) with her fingertips. The tiny muscles beneath her fingertips fluttered, and he let out a gurgled laugh that made her heart melt.

Nayeon smiled down at him, "Someone's a little ticklish, isn't he?" She continued to gently tickle her son's belly, watching as his tiny hands fluttered and his little legs kicked in response. The laugh that erupted from him was infectious, filling the cramped train compartment with a joyous sound that made even the weariest of eyes sparkle.

Minho couldn't help but chuckle as well, his gaze drifting down to the newborn's face. "You really are something else, aren't you?" he murmured, brushing a lock of hair away from the baby's forehead. "You've already got your mother wrapped around your finger."

Nayeon smiled, feeling a warmth spread through her chest. "Well, I'd be foolish not to," she said, continuing to tickle her son's belly. "He's just so cute, isn't he?"

Around them, the women on the train nodded in agreement, their faces softening as they watched the baby laugh in response to his mother's tickles. The sound of laughter filled the cramped compartment, replacing the tension and fear that had been so thick only hours ago. Minho leaned in, unable to resist joining in the gentle teasing as he gently tickled the baby's belly as well. "Oh, are we ticklish now?" he asked with a grin.

The baby's laughter grew louder, his tiny body squirming and kicking as he seemed to enjoy the attention. Nayeon looked up at Minho, her cheeks flushed with warmth. "You're really good at that," she said, still stroking her son's back. "I think he likes you."

That night, Nayeon's family was already gawking over the baby as soon as they reached their village. The news of his birth and the miracle that had saved them had spread like wildfire throughout the small community. Everyone was in awe of the newborn's resilience and the strength of the bond between Nayeon and Minho. The women oohed and aahed over the baby, cooing words of encouragement and offering their advice on how to raise him. The men, too, were taken aback by the story, exchanging looks of disbelief and admiration as they shared whispers about the incredible events that had transpired.

Her mother, Suk-Ja, took the baby from Nayeon's arms, gently cradling him in her own. She was proudly showing him off to everyone, telling them how strong he was, how he had survived against all odds. Nayeon smiled at her mother's doting, feeling a newfound appreciation for the woman who had raised her. She glanced over at Minho, who was talking with his father and brothers, their voices low and serious as they discussed the events of the past few days.

"You know," Suk-Ja said, rocking the baby gently in her arms, "you two have been through so much together. It's a true testament to the bond between husband and wife." Nayeon looked down at the ground, feeling a blush creep up her cheeks. She couldn't deny the closeness she felt with Minho now, after everything they'd been through.

Suddenly, one of Nayeon’s siblings, U-jin, who had been standing nearby, let out a gasp. "Eomma, somebody's at the door!" He sprinted toward the entrance of the house, leaving the group of women momentarily confused. "Who could it be?" Suk-Ja asked, her eyes wide with curiosity. "It's so late..."

As U-jin returned, leading an unfamiliar man into the main room, the group fell silent. The man was tall and lanky, his hair a mess of gray and black, and his clothes were eloquent in their disarray. He stumbled slightly as he walked, as if he had traveled far and fast. His eyes were fixed on Nayeon, and there was an unmistakable look of relief and determination in them. "Reginald," he gasped, "it's been too long."

Reginald  said something in English that the family didn’t understand. He touches the baby on his forehead and chest, muttering words under his breath. Realizing the family doesn’t understand him, he switches from English to Korean. "How much do you want for him? I'll give you whatever you want." His eyes dart around the room, as if he's trying to gauge the value of the child.

Hearing this asshole wanting to buy her grandchild, Suk-Ja's blood boiled. She snatched a nearby knife from the counter and pointed it at Reginald's chest. "Stay back," she warned, her voice trembling with rage. "You lay one finger on my grandson, I slice you into pieces." Her eyes darted between Reginald and the baby, her grip on the knife unyielding.

The other family members gasped, their eyes wide with shock and admiration as they watched the scene unfold. Reginald's expression changed from one of desperation to one of awe, his gaze fixed on Suk-Ja. Her knife, held steady and sure, was not a threat to him now; it was a symbol of strength, resilience, and unwavering love.

"You're right," he murmured, his voice barely audible above the pounding of their hearts. "He deserves nothing but the best. I'm not here to take him away from you. I just want to make sure he's given every opportunity in life." His eyes found Nayeon's, and for a moment, they held each other's gaze. There was an understanding there, a shared connection that transcended their differences.

"I can give him a home," Reginald continued, "a good education, the best doctors in the world. I can give him a life of comfort and adventure. I know that money can't buy everything, but I promise you, I will love him with all that I am." He paused, taking a deep breath, before adding, "He'll have five siblings (or a brother in another life) who will adore him, and who will grow up together, learning from each other, sharing their joys and sorrows. He'll have the chance to travel the world, to see the beauty that this life has to offer, and to experience things that most people only dream of."

Suk-Ja listened intently, her grip on the knife loosening slightly. She glanced at Nayeon, who seemed to be lost in thought. The grandmother could see the conflicting emotions playing across her daughter's face: the love she felt for her child, the desire to give him a better life, and the fear of losing him.

Until a small dextrous tentacle shot out from the baby's fleshy belly, wrapping around Suk-Ja's finger. The old woman let out a gasp of surprise, but her grip on the knife didn't waver. The tentacle was cold and slimy, and it squeezed gently around her finger, as if seeking comfort or reassurance.

"I didn’t know I was pregnant when I ate that grilled squid!" Nayeon cried, her voice cracking with emotion. "I swear I'd never do anything to hurt him. I just wanted a better life for us, that's all!"

"And you can, Nayeon," Reginald said gently, taking a step forward. "You can give him all of those things. You can give him a life full of love, adventure, and opportunity. But not by yourself. Not if you have to choose between him and your dreams." He placed a hand on her shoulder, his voice firm but reassuring.

Suk-Ja watched the interaction between the two young people, her heart torn in two. She knew that Nayeon was right; their family was poor, and they would never be able to give their child the life that Reginald could. But the thought of losing her grandson, of never seeing his face again, was unbearable.

"But Nayeon, I must warn you," Reginald said, his voice lowering to a graveled whisper. "If you were to attempt to contact the child, to try and find him... You will pay the ultimate penalty. There will be no forgiveness. You must understand that."

Nayeon's eyes widened with fear, her breath hitching in her throat. She looked up at the man, searching his face for any hint of deceit. But all she saw was genuine concern and care. She knew he was telling her the truth.

Suk-Ja watched the exchange between them, her heart heavy with the weight of their decision. She could see the conflict playing out on her daughter's face: the love she felt for her child, the desire to protect him, and the fear of losing him.

"I understand," Nayeon finally whispered, her voice barely audible over the gentle lapping of the waves. "I won't try to find him. I promise." Her eyes filled with tears as she looked at her child once more. "But please, let me keep this," she begged, reaching out to touch the slimy tentacle that had wrapped around her grandmother's finger. "Just let me have this one small piece of him."

Suk-Ja felt her own tears welling up in response. She knew how much it would mean to Nayeon to have something of her grandson. But she also knew the risks. She took a deep breath, forcing herself to be strong for her daughter. "Very well," she said, reluctantly. "You may keep it."

Nayeon let out a shaky breath, her shoulders slumping in relief. With trembling hands, she reached out and carefully detached the tentacle from her son's flesh. As she held it close, the slimy appendage twitched softly, as if it were alive. Nayeon's child cried as the tentacle was severed from his body, and the sound pierced her heart like a dagger. She bit her lip, fighting back tears as she pressed the tentacle to her chest.

"He'll be fine," Reginald assured her, his voice gentle. "He'll grow up strong and healthy. He'll have all the love and opportunity in the world. You'll see."

(If he lives past 17 you’ll be very lucky to see him again.)

Nayeon and Minho watched as the distance between them and their son grew larger with each passing moment. She clutched the tentacle tightly, feeling as though it were the last thread connecting her to her child. The boat carrying them away disappeared around a bend in the river, leaving only the sound of the waves and the cries of sea birds.

[reidiriri]

UNCERTAINTY OF MY FUTURE PATH

I once asked myself if I really do have a future. If there is one, what will it looks like? What and where am I destined for? What is my life goal? What do I want for myself, aside from just doing things for my family? Ano nga ba talaga? When will I genuinely be happy? You might say, "Our goal in this world is to serve and enjoy life," but for me, it's not that simple. As I write this article, I want to remind you that it's rated SPG-18, so Strong Parental Guidance is advised. Okay, enough with the corny stuff, let's continue.

Since I was a kid, people have always asked me what I want to be when I grow up (my future), and until now, I will always avoid that question. I sometimes envy those pips who doesn't hesitate to answer that question, which I really can't provide even a single sentence as an answer. So, I always end up saying I want what my parents want for me, which is teaching. At first, I did love teaching, but as I got older, I lost interest on it, especially when there were other things I wanted to do. But the problem is, all of those interests are temporary "panandalian lamang". For example, now that I'm about to enter college, I want to pursue a Bachelor of Science in Accountancy (BSA), but later on, if there's even a slight conflict with the subjects related to that course, my interest shifts elsewhere, which is frustrating to the point that it makes me cry. I often wonder if my life has really its purpose? Or am I going to die early so I'm always uncertain of everything I do? It's also tiring and scary not knowing which path to take. There's so many "what ifs," and thinking about them terrifies me, that feeling of being afraid to take regrets or there's something that I can't pinpoint. So, I've decided to just go with the flow, but until when? How long will I be like this? What if it's too late if one day I finally figure out what I want to do?

I remember all the tough times I've had. There were struggles with my family, school, and self-problem. Sometimes, it felt like I couldn't get over these problems. But I've learned a lot about life from dealing with them. Being the eldest, I had to handle a lot of responsibilities. Trying to balance these with schoolwork was hard. I felt like I always on edge.

While I'm growing up, I always felt like there was a lot of pressure on me. It seemed like everyone had big hopes and dreams for me. As a eldest daughter, I felt the weight of my parents' expectations for my success. And as a student, I felt like I had to do really well in school all the time. My parents just wanted what was best for me. They worked really hard and made sacrifices to give me opportunities they never had. They always encouraged me to aim high and do my best in everything. But sometimes, trying to meet their expectations felt really tough.

In school, I always felt like I had to be perfect. Grades weren't just about showing how well I did in class; they felt like they showed how good of a person I was. Every test and assignment felt like a big deal, like if I didn't do well, I wasn't good enough. It made me feel really scared of failing, so I kept pushing myself harder and harder. But even with all the pressure, I found comfort in learning. Even when things got tough, there was something really satisfying about understanding a hard topic or doing well on a test. Those little wins kept me going and reminded me why I loved learning in the first place.

As I got older, I started to realize that a lot of the pressure I felt wasn't just from other people it was also from myself. I started to believe that my value as a person was tied to how well I did in school. And that made me put even more pressure on myself. It wasn't until I let go of that idea that I started to feel better. I stopped thinking that my grades defined me and started focusing on just doing my best.

I learned to be proud of my successes and not be too hard on myself when things didn't go perfectly. Looking back now, I see that all that pressure I felt helped shape me into who I am today. It taught me to be strong, to keep going even when things were tough, and to always be true to myself. Even though it was hard at times, I wouldn't change anything about my journey. Because in the end, it was all that pressure that helped me become the best version of myself.

One also of the biggest struggles I faced was not feeling confident of myself. I often doubted if I was good enough and compared myself to others. This lack of confidence stopped me from doing things I loved and reaching my full potential. It took me a while to realize that my worth isn't just about what I achieve, but about who I am as a person.

Another struggle I had was trying to be perfect all the time. I set really high standards for myself and was afraid of making mistakes or being rejected. Trying to be perfect all the time made me feel exhausted and unhappy. I also struggled with doubting myself and being too hard on myself. I often listened to negative thoughts in my head and felt bad about myself because of past mistakes. These thoughts made me feel bad about myself and made it hard for me to go after my dreams. Lastly, I had a hard time figuring out who I really was and where I fit in. I felt lost and confused, not sure if I should follow what others expected of me or what I truly wanted.

Being in a situation like this makes me feel terrible and useless. It's exhausting pretending that all my life goals are settled when in reality, everything is a mess. I always have this doubt in myself and I tried to encourage to trust the process and believe in myself, but that doubt keeps coming back. I am also an academically achiever nd I received awards that I wanted, but you know that feeling of not being contented? Feeling incomplete? Like there's something is missing? Even though my life is fine? And I can't pinpoint what it is, and I'm still hoping to find what's that missing piece 'cause I know that's the only thing that will make me genuinely happy. Well, luckily I found this person in my life who became my confidant in everything. I know she's tired of dealing with my emotions and personal dilemmas, but she still holds me up tight even when I feel completely defeated/really down.

Yes, I proudly can say that I have a complete and happy family. Although, we're not financially stable, but my parents have worked hard to provide us a decent life, something I am truly grateful for. They are only my motivation to work well and strive more towards for a better future. They deserve to experience a life that they have not yet experienced, so as much as possible I will make every effort to take the actions that I believe will help me to accomplish all of those even if there is no certainty.

Throughout this journey, I've faced many ups and downs that shaped who I am today. Lately, I've had some tough times, but I've kept going despite them. Even though I've had recent challenges, I won't let them stop me. I see them as chances to learn and get stronger. Whether it's dealing with setbacks or believing in myself, I've learned to embrace the journey. Each twist and turn brings me closer to success. Looking ahead, I feel more determined than ever. I've learned a lot and become more resilient. I know I can handle whatever comes my way. Every day, I'm reminded that perseverance, flexibility, and positivity are key to reaching my goals.

Even when things got tough, I never gave up on trying to improve myself. Instead of getting stuck on past mistakes, I looked ahead and kept pushing forward. With a positive attitude and determination, I found ways to overcome obstacles and keep working towards my goals. Whether it's dealing with setbacks or doubting myself, I've learned to embrace the journey and keep moving forward, knowing that each challenge brings me closer to success.

#hopingandmoving

[impkeen]

hi~! i’m 𝑒𝑣𝑒 (s/h) 21+, i’m a little late to posting an intro, because if timezones are going to do anything, it’s whoop my ass. most of what you’ll want to know can be found on his pages, but below the cut are some good old-fashioned bullet points about incidental superstar, commercial model, pretty boy, and true north’s “4D” lead vocal, 𝑐𝘩𝑒𝑜𝑛 𝑑𝑜𝑦𝑒𝑜𝑛. i don’t use d-scord much, but if you really, really want/prefer to, i can absolutely give it to you; i’m generally 🆗 with using tumblr to get the job done, though. like this to let me know you’d like to plot! either way, i look forward to writing with all of you! :-)

personality

doyeon makes friends pretty easily; he doesn't have any pretenses about the sorts of people he wants to hang out with, and the only real requisite is that they're honest. however, he does admittedly tend to be drawn particularly to people with a certain quirk or oddness, or even misery, about them.

as a friend, he's loyal and unafraid to call people on their bullshit, which is why he appreciates reciprocity in honesty. he enjoys a bit of back and forth banter, platonic flirting, etc. he's a playful chap; it's how he shows affection. skinship is case-by-case, but never off the table. he's down for most things and is pretty much a must-call in a heist situation.

his love language is time spent, so he's likely the sort of friend to be happy doing as little as accompanying his friend on an errand run or sitting next to them while they both do their own thing. he's an extrovert, (or an ambivert, at least) and that alone probably justifies it in his head. some time is better than no time, especially when you look at how precious of a resource free time is in this line of work. he's a carer, he cares. don't mention it.

on the other hand, he likely makes enemies just as easily. his candidness is as charming as it is potentially grating. he's not shy about his opinions and it's not impossible that he's rubbed people the wrong way in doing so, and equally possible that he's joked around with someone too "roughly" and ruined their opinion of him by being an asshole. he's moody and unpredictable, so he definitely antagonizes people on his worst days, or even just when he's bored.

he's vaguely polyamorous in the sense that it's entirely plausible that he could earnestly, deeply be in love with multiple people, but he probably lacks the actual emotional maturity to enter a polyamorous relationship without getting jealous / it ending in disaster; he’s very stingy about the people he loves.

that being said, his genuinely romantic (that being relationships that go beyond the physical) endeavors probably happen few and far between. he's a hopeless romantic, but his whole thing is that he loves the idea of being in love, even loves dating, but he wants to make sure he's with someone that's worth the emotional energy or the inherent risk of ruining everything.

he'll absolutely flirt, though.

facts

his older sister is a backpacker who's traveling the world, but she’s also pursuing a law degree, so he's a little annoyed about her going the extra mile to be a woman of the world and free and well-traveled, too, while he rarely has agency over what country he’s in at any given time span; but he also still thinks the sun shines out of her ass after spending his whole life following her around like a puppy.

his mom is a pastry chef, his dad is a chef and the co-owner of a cafe somewhere in seoul, and they’re both textbook perfectionists, so his whole way of rebelling against that is by being slightly obscure and following his whims. which backfired a little bit, because look who's an idol!

contrary to what you might believe based on him being the way he is, doyeon thinks kpop is at its best when it's unapologetically happy, and weird, and all that other fluffy stuff, so he's a legitimate fan of groups that do cute surreal concepts.

he crochets! close friends of doyeon have absolutely received various crocheted items as gifts at random! he especially enjoys making hats and scarves.

he has a stuffed animal he's been sleeping with since birth that he's torn up literal hotel rooms to find. like, it's that serious.

he's a big handyman in general; if you need someone to help you build furniture or fix a leaky faucet, or anything, really: he's your man. he's great at putting things together.

he is entirely too cute for a man his age, but he's simply. like that. by design. sorry, bro’s a cutie patootie.

talent-wise, i'd say he's very well-rounded and capable of picking up just about any skill. his baseline is generally above average because of how long he’s aspired to be in this line of work, so when he applies himself, he's really exceptional. the problem is that he rarely does. he’s like a gifted kid who moved up into a curriculum that required him to actually study instead of coasting by.

he's very by-the-books in terms of being an idol and is the first to be like "😣 guys, i dont know about this..." if something steers too close to a potential scandal, but still winds up in the mix half the time, anyway, so.

reigning light-weight champion of fan service.

he's bi. historically, his taste in women is truly milf-coded women and his taste in men is big idiots, but he's open to all kinds of people. he falls for men most often, but has been interested in women often enough that it can’t really be written off as incidental.

he's an optimist, but he is also constantly fighting for his life, so it might not even be working.

his favorite movie is scream (1996) and i feel like that says a lot about him somehow.

he is in a constant state of having to remind himself that someone asking about his hobbies doesn't warrant a soul tie

he's like a nesting animal, just picking up bits and bobs and trinkets because he thinks they look neat. he's buying postcards from every country he goes to, to make a collage someday.

he's kind-of a dick when he's in his feelings; vindictive and spiteful on the worst days (like, cause strife in your marriage vindictive-and-spiteful), but he also tries really hard to smooth things over after the fact, because consequences for his actions are scary.

generally speaking, he wants to diffuse any tension, awkward or otherwise, and keep everyone comfortable, if he can, because he really just has no idea how to resolve conflict as a third party, so he'll play jester if he has to.

sometimes you can just tell that he was spoiled as a child. even though he tries to be better and conscious of that sort of thing, he definitely has his moments.

his idea of flirting is probably just staring at you until you realize that he's in love with you. it's really obvious when he's into someone, but it's also entirely plausible that he's simply tripped and fallen into every relationship he's ever been in by pure luck and circumstance and good old-fashioned boyish charm.

he's the polar opposite of shy, so he's one of those people who's friends with people you wouldn't even expect him to be friends with. like, what do you mean you're friends with a 40-year-old street vendor in srilanka, doyeon? how did you even meet that man?

his aesthetic is very atemporal-but-vaguely-early-00s techie who just sort-of throws things on in the morning, and makes it work somehow; he prefers headset earphones over airpods, unless he's on a run or something.

he's got a decently projected voice when he's singing, but his speaking voice is like a third of the volume unless he's yelling.

100% “babygirlified” by his fanbase.

he acts shamelessly but he is actually really easily embarrassed. you can tell because his ears get super red, as much as he’d like to play it off, but he does well on variety shows, because of this willingness to kind of sacrifice his image for the sake of a good tv moment.

very flexible for no good reason.

he's got a master's in domesticity, somewhat of a clean freak.

you could probably drag this man to hell, if you made it sound fun enough.

[hvenart]

So in a previous post I talked about follow from my beautiful man and now I wanna talk about the song bitter because the amount of references to the show is INSANE. Literally every line is something you can relate to Hira/ the show itself.

If red rain falls let’s chase the clouds away:

I saw someone in the comments say that this could be a reference to the tomato juice incident in s1

You are like fragrant olives:

reference to the tea olive tree in Hira’s garden (osmanthus fragrans)

I’ve misjudged you no doubt but I want to look up at you/ I still want to touch you:

their fight starts because Hira misunderstands what Kiyoi wants. He puts himself down and hurts Kiyoi yet he still wants to touch him (he is also positioned below Kiyoi so he has to look up at him).

Im even willing to die. Savouring the sweetness of wanting you. Never enough photos of you. I’ll keep yearning for absolute beauty:

this reminds me of the monologue of Hira after their fight. He has taken so many photos of him and wants to stay in those moments forever. He takes photos because he wants to capture the beauty before it’s gone because in his eyes their break-up is inevitable. He’s willing to die for these moments.

Only you can be captured in this frame, my eternal love:

Kiyoi is the only person Hira ever takes photos of. Kiyoi is the only love of his life and his devotion for kiyoi is eternal.

You’re irritating like the moon:

reference to Hira’s framed picture of the moon (also someone mentioned in the comments that the ‘a… a… ano tsuki’ sounds like Hira stuttering which could reference to the fact that Hira stutters and isn’t able to explain to his classmates that the photo isn’t of a full moon)

Although you say I annoy you, I won’t give up. I could tell you a million times. My magnificent, beautiful man:

in ‘Follow’ a couple of the last lines were something along the lines of Kiyoi wanting Hira to pursue him and convince him to accept him and while Hira doesn’t necessarily take big steps, there are things he doesn’t give up on. No matter how many times Kiyoi calls him disgusting/creepy Hira will always call him beautiful which is one of the reasons (I think) why Kiyoi fell in love with him in the first place.

If you encourage me, I’d attempt anything. No matter how reckless:

Hira stays in the photography club because Kiyoi encouraged him to do so. Hira joined the photo contest because Kiyoi encouraged him to do so. Kiyoi pushes him to do things he normally would be too insecure about to do them (even him trying those clothes in s2 ep1)



So many of these emotions are new to me. Please tell me, God:

Kiyoi made Hira feel things he hadn’t felt before. He doesn’t find things particularly beautiful until he met Kiyoi. He admits that he doesn’t like boys or girls and that Kiyoi is the only special one for him.

This happiness eternal:

his love for Kiyoi will always be there even if Kiyoi himself isn’t.

A helpless song like this/ why do you look displeased everytime I hit replay:

Hira sees their love almost as a tragedy waiting to happen and always falls back into this sentiment of an unrequited love/ god and worshipper. Kiyoi isn’t happy about that which leads to their fight (I actually wouldn’t be surprised if they have this fight multiple times throughout the years)

Its a selfish lousy song, I realise it now. I was hurting you but it’s too late and I’m too timid to pick up the chestnut I dropped:

After their fight Hira realises how much he hurt Kiyoi with his words. He may not understand WHY it hurts him but he does know it does. But he thinks it to late to change it. I saw someone in the comments say that The chestnut part could refrence the idiom of ‘picking up chestnuts in the fire’ which (loosely) means to take risks/ do something difficult for someone else without getting anything in return/have a negative impact on you. Hira doesn’t want to confront the problem. He is scared.

Please bury me and my insensitivity:

Hira always wants Kiyoi to punish him for his mistakes and doesn’t think he deserves him.

I’m scared to understand you, my eternal love:

I think this is a sentence that perfectly sums up Hira in season 2

Unrequited love isn’t bad, I want to drown in my pleasant dreams:

This was the sentiment Hira had the day after their fight.

Fear makes me go around in circles:

The fear of understanding Kiyoi and the fear of their relationship one day ending is what makes Hira keep repeating his mistakes. It is the reason why he puts Kiyoi on this pedestal because he doesn’t know what will happen if he destroys it for good.

We can’t even kiss if we’re not equal: Kiyoi’s ‘punishment’ of Hira is not kissing him until he face him head on. This makes Hira confronthis fears and we see him opening up to Kiyoi and him finally talking to him as equals (at equal height).

You’ll be in my frame forever:

repeats the same sentiment of Kiyoi being Hira’s forever and only love. Beautiful sentence.

This isn’t everything and it isn’t fully my analysis but I accidentally deleted my first text so yeah…. Also these are just my interpretations so take all of these with a grain of salt. It’s insane how many things reference and correlate to the show. The song fits the vibe of the show perfectly and it’s just SO GOOD.

Once again English sucks blah blah blah…

ISTG the songs are like the show in a different medium it’s amazing

[juyomiao]

NAURRR I FORGOT TO SCREENSHOT THE NOTIFICATION💔 but tumblr was being saur cute sisbissnks it was like

juyomiao has posted

we noticed they're one if your favorites❤️

or smthn along the lines of that and ACK IT WAS SAUR CUTE PLS JSBKSNSKSKA-

anyways idk if u can answer the first one but it's still cool hshshshs

✩ do you have/ can you give some not-so-spoiler spoilers for o.o? (hahajahs u made me obsessed w this and im not complaining)

★ your mtl biased member in cravity? (just ur preferences, u may put reasoning if u want :] )

✩ fav/recommended tbz songs? (im really planning on stanning they seem fun ajajasjs)

★ *IF* w1 is really pursuing with the greek mythology shit, which god/goddess (there's a possibility) do you think bin is going to be? (and state ur reasons hshs)

omg tumblr being cute (unexpected)

☆ uhhhh idk how to give spoilers without spoiling everything so all i can say is what i alr said : its getting more angsty bc i like being cruel n ruining things 🤭 BUT dw it will have a happy ending and the funny elements of the fic r not going anywhere bc thats still the most important part to me

★ okay omg this is hard wait

disclaimer ofc i love all the members

minhee : he was my bias in x1 too so even when i didnt rlly stan cravity i still considered him my cravity bias lmao hes also the proof i have a 'type' when biasing idols bc . the minhee - younghoon - sunghoon trinity explains a lot abt it

serim : he was the reason i got more interested in cravity bc i was watching a cravity park episode n realized how fine he was so ,, yeah . kind of surprising bc he was one of the two members i didnt rlly know abt before stanning (i knew minhee hyeongjun wonjin n jungmo bc of produce n knew seongmin taeyoung n allen bc ppl talk abt them a lot) but im so insane abt him to the point something i said after seeing one of his pics became an inside joke in my friend group

seongmin : my bbg hes so cute n pretty n soft n i love his voice so much . n lately i've been wanting to eat him too .

hyeongjun : ofc knew him bc of x1/pdx n already loved him back then but now even more . in the nicest way possible hes insane hes not normal but thats exactly why i love him

this is where it gets more complicated bc i cant rlly rank them ? like probably woobin n then jungmo wonjin n allen more or less on the same level ?? like even i would expect jungmo n wonjin to be higher but . heres a fun fact‼️i watched produce without subtitles ! so i remember little to nothing abt it n had no idea what was going on ⅔ of the time !! bc i used to watch it when they livestreamed it on youtube n then was too lazy to go look for the subbed ep ,, then i got more attached to minhee n hyeongjun bc they were in x1 obviously

that was so long im sorry but u cant give me a perfect opportunity to infodump abt my special interest / hyperfixation n . expect me not to do it

☆ OHHHH OKAY so idk what music u like more so this list might be a bit questionable bc i like everything even noise music . but i'll focus on b-sides !!

walkin in time , only one (obviously , the queen who inspired my fic title) , melting heart , l.o.u , text me back , daydream , espionage , shake you down , scar , salty , goodbye , checkmate , shine shine , insanity , prism , kiss me if you can , hush , kingdom come (i'll never get tired of saying it , tbz were robbed on that bitchass show FUCK MNET) drink it , out of control , nightmares , merry bad ending , hypnotized , russian roulette , one dance , sweet , c.o.d.e , survive the night , levitating , awake , savior

tbz's entire discography is honestly perfect have fun stanning them u wont regret it‼️‼️

★ honestly idk😭😭 when i was younger (n we r talking abt 5yo until 14yo so it was . a while) i was sooo obsessed with greek mythology but my brain just . wiped all that information away😭 so i genuinely dont know

[creedslove]

Have you watched the Kdrama "Nevertheless"?

spoiler!!!!

It's a story about a girl who develops feelings for her FWB, who is a very popular guy and behind the scenes they are total bf gf and she’s falling hard for him but he is still close to his ex who is visiting. she realizes that he may never commit to her and starts avoiding him.

She does that after confronting him and after he has been total jerk to her and she discovers he has lead other girls on the same way. She briefly leaves town and He follows her trying to win her back and is being loved by her aunt, he then confesses his feelings many times but the girl chooses not to believe at all.

They go to the same art school, they have always acted like there's nothing going on between them, while she was vising her town her friends visits her too??? one of her friend from her friend group is openly hitting on him and simultaneously there’s a childhood friend of the girl who is trying to pursue her. but then the childhood-guy realizes that these two have something going on and he puts his feelings aside and stops pursuing her. Also, The fuck boy in this show knows how to make the girl weak he’s just so perfect like that lol.

On returning back, she has been failing her art classes and the Fboy offers to help to which they work together on the condition that he leaves her alone for good before the final art exhibition. (they work in his basement and he finally shows her his place or something i dont remember) right before the exhibition He keeps his word and leaves her without a way to contact him.

After doing well in the exhibition she realizes she has noone to share the good news with ( esp him) she tries to find him, but there's no trace.... the girl goes to the basement where they worked on the project to realize he has sold the house.. she then discovers old sketches of her drawn by him out of admiration, he has drawn her the very first time he ever saw her a year ago (she didn't know him then but he had seen her already) and how grateful we was that their paths crossed again in art school, she finds out he always loved her but was too afraid to express his feelings. He knew from the start she deserves someone better and he knows he is too careless with her heart..

Love at first sight kinda thing for him, even though he got a chance to be with her he constantly fucked up and now its too late bc the girl will never take him back. This is just a brief summary of the series it’s actually very nice and detailed they do end up together.

your writing Betrayed reminded me a lot of the show , both the guys are playing with girls heart and how the girls get wiser and push them away is when the guys get their act together … I hope you get inspired and actually give the reader & Pedro a chance because I am assuming they aren’t fwb.. I hope they either cross the friends line if not at least now or P suffers watching other pursue her but the reader isn't really happy bc it's not P... I wish to see some element of wants/cravings lol

Great Work!!!!!!!

I have never!!! I have a lot of kdramas on my nefltix list but i never got to watch them because I'm honestly so lazy for series and i usually waste all my time on soap opera lmao but this whole story sounds absolutely amazing!!! That's definitely the kind of drama i like and i already added it to my list, and as it is a short series I'll take a look at it on the weekend, so hopefully I'll enjoy it as much as I did the description you sent me!

It is funny how similar the plots are, but i swear I didn't watch it, it all came from my mind plus my lovely anon's ideas hehehe, but I'm happy to see a lot of people dig into drama hahaha

Pedro and reader aren't fwb but there's definitely feelings between them, they are unresolved and they need to figure out if they'll stay together or not. I'm so excited to see what people will think of this next chapter, I guess people will be divided, hehehe thanks for the awesome ask, anon!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[amratsu]

after reading @ryo-maybe 's recs, compiling my own rider recommendations/breakdowns, in chronological order of release, with the general approach of 'here's what you may enjoy' and 'here's what people love/remember it for'. den-o onwards to zi-o cause I need to rewatch the older ones tbh. I've watched all of these myself once, and (barring ghost) with @stuffman-main and @icedfairy so you can poke them for opinions too probably.

>den-o the first 'comedy' rider that really leaned into its mascots, so much so that said mascots are kind of still around to this day like 15 years later. this tends to give the wrong impression though, because den-o still takes a surprisingly deep and melancholic look at its themes of existential dread and being remembered. it's a generally fun time that'll also pull at your heartstrings at surprising times, and takeru satoh (of current ruroken live action fame) really does portray the growth of the protagonist from a complete non-person into a still-nervous-but-will-throw-down hero nicely.

>kiva oh I absolutely agree with the general consensus of crazy aesthetic (fucking STAINED GLASS VAMPIRES?) but whack-ass writing, but as my first rider I have a big soft spot for it. it was also the first rider I watched together with stuffman-main and iced-fairy as an introduction to deeper weeb enjoyment. make no mistake, kiva is deep in the late 2000s sauce of plot via lack of communication, but at the same time it's still kind of charming how earnest it is about it? it's just 100% vampire melodrama inside a kamen rider. and also the time period gimmick is, in retrospect, one of the weirdest and most ambitious plot threads toei's ever tried. I can't even straight say I recommend kiva, but if you can stick around after they only really get better. (fun fact with kiva: the default suit was so fucking heavy BECAUSE IT HAD ACTUAL METAL CAUSE THEY WANTED NATURAL CHAIN JINGLING that they had to introduce the super mode like a dozen episodes early or else the suit actor was literally going to be crushed)

>decade anniversary series. meme origin point.

>w I think if any series really leans into its subgenre the most, it's a toss-up between W and Exaid, but W is way more universally loved. it's a tight noir experience, the duos done so well that it'd fuck with rider writing for multiple series to come (for better or worse). the way it plays with its supporting cast really makes the city feel alive in a way that makes it as easy to love Fuuto as much as shotaro does. the rider tropes themselves are also handled very well, with little arbitrary power ups or alt forms, and an absolutely unheard of total of two riders, period, until you go into side materials. and the writing very much benefits from its ability to focus on them to the exclusion of anyone else. extremely easy recommendation, and its 2 episode format also makes it very easy to watch in short sessions.

>ooo where W lives and dies by its two-episoders, OOOs uses it to support the developing relationship between protag and 'mascot' while also pursuing a much more ambitious overarching metaplot. the nonlinear nature of the belt/suit 'upgrades' leads to an pretty exciting shuffle of transformation trinkets between the protagonist and villains; you never quite know who has what, and in that sense it's almost closer to a rider royale with how the characters jockey for the macguffins. eiji's also a generally very refreshing protagonist who will still do Dumb things, but not Stupid things, and that's a fine line to walk/write I appreciate a lot.

>fourze anything I could say ryo(?)'s already said. it's just fun. it's very different from a lot of other riders though in that you won't see the same emotional ups and downs in the plot you would elsewhere. gentaro's just immune to that shit.

>wizard oof. I'm going to be bold here and say I find haruto, the protag, fine. lots of people say he's boring and one note, which I disagree with; he shows a fair amount of subtle growth as a person over the course of the series. nito, the side rider, is also great. aesthetics are also great fun. but wizard is absolutely STRANGLED by its one note supporting cast, a peanut gallery full of drag-you-to-the-lake-bed cement that's just impossible to care about. if you can deal with the generic kid's show level of eyeroll carry-on cast, you'll probably have an okay time here.

>gaim gaim gaim gaim. oh gaim. I love you so much. and this is contingent on spoilers, but, I think urobuchi plots honestly fine if there's a happy ending. and there is, because SPOILERS that facilitate post-series xovers. like of all the ways we've seen urobuchi wank about the cruelty of the system, the futility of struggling against it, and the tragedy of life, gaim's protagonists arguably end up doing a lot more to win despite it. and also I find the thought of urobuchi simmering in his dark little corner because toei forced him to write a happy ending really, REALLY funny. can't recommend unless you're in the mood for urobuchi though.

>drive honestly? drive is one of the most inoffensive riders. nothing really wrong about it. it leans into its subgenre a lot in the vein of W, so if you're in the mood for a cop show with androids and robots it'll do you good. the protag is also a tall drink of water. definitely a fine starting point.

>ghost oh god. no. by this point in the time line, the 'cool rider=sucky show' meme is really in full force. there's really not a lot I can write on ghost that hasn't been said by other people, but in short it's just very one note with very shallow characters, and a lot of shoehorned merchandising that messes with what little coherence there is (the super form is a seperate belt all on its own, never used by anything else. why???).

>exaid again, ryo(?) has me covered here. worth pointing out though, ex-aid is a perfect otome game cast: clumsy good boy with some spice to him, tragic serious elite genius, jokey lovable trickster, abrasive jerk with heart of gold. so that's fun.

>build build's AMBITIOUS. the conspiracy/amnesia plot goes deep, and it almost forsakes a monster of the week and all the tropes attached to that entirely. whether it lands the plot is up to debate but at the very least the characters are all very well realized and live. they all struggle with 'who am I' in their personal ways, and the way they clash up against each other (ESPECIALLY the villains) is exciting.

>zi-o another anniversary series.

[tiredassmage]

15 questions, 15 mutuals

Thank you for the tag @captainderyn!

1. Are you named after anyone?

Possibly a great, great(?) grandmother I never had the chance to meet, via middle name, though it’s been... probably at least a decade since I heard that tatter and I’m not sure how correct it is, lol. I’m... not particularly close to a vast majority of the family, tbh, given Drama(TM). Mom picked by meanings though. I know that was very important to her.

2. When was the last time you cried?

I... think I cried a little about a week and a half ago in one of my classes. Not because the class, I promise, lol. We watched the pilot episode of a show called Station Eleven in class and that was a gut puncher.

3. Do you have kids?

No, thank you. My pets and my OCs are all I need, lol. Very ace. Not my personal cup of tea.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Mmmm. I wouldn’t say regularly. It has its moments and I’m sure I was a bit more brutal with it when I was a kid, but its purpose isn’t generally helpful in areas where I need to communicate. I think most of the things I say sarcastically now are probably in regards to fictional characters. xD

5. Favorite time of day?

Late evening, in that like seven - ten pm range. Generally evenings. I’m absolutely not a morning person. If I’m up rather early, I’m tired later in the day. Evening tends to host “me” time.

6. Eye color?

Good ol’ reliable brown. (I need more brown eyed ocs, tbh?) Fun fact: eyes are kind of what enchants me, irl and I probably tend to be a bit invested in fictional character eye colors, too, lol. They’re beautiful. I have no other explanation. That said, I’m very shy about eye contact until I feel more comfortable with people/get to know them better.

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings, if I’m picking between them and scary. I don’t do horror, I am baby. I can be enraptured by a decent thriller and loved a good crime drama TV show. I can kind of do paranormal stuff sometimes, but I can scare myself just thinking a little too hard about it, so very hesitant.

8. Any special talents?

Mmmm... nothing nontraditional, I suppose. I had a few music teachers tell me when I was younger that I have hands that would’ve been great for piano, but I wasn’t super interested in pursuing musical interests outside of, like, basic school requirements. I did chorus for a while, but was kinda eh. I did enjoy acoustic guitar, but, again, not exactly enough that I ended up doing anything with it.

9. Where were you born?

Rural northeastern US of A. I miss having a fall season, but decidedly not enough to give up the warmth of living much farther south.

10. What are your hobbies?

Largely video games, lol, if it was hard to tell. I’d like to do more drawing and get into digital art. I am majoring in Digital Media Design, after all. One of my hopes is to properly play around with a tablet I bought myself over the summer while I take a break from courses. I desire to draw my blorbos, haha!

11. Do you have any pets?

Two ball pythons, the loves and amusing occasional nuisances of my life! They made a brief appearance on my main here. There’s also two dogs in the house, James and Cooper. Cooper is definitively my mom’s dog, however, and, jokingly, my little brother. (He’s her favorite. We all know this.) Cooper is... ??? We think a Collie mix. And James is a Basset-Lab, both adopted about a year or two apart, if I remember right.

12. What sports do you/have you played?

Oh, actual eons ago, I briefly played soccer (probably not very well) when I was very, very small. I have ridden horses (I miss them, Brent), but primarily only in schooling shows and I did participate for a few years in my barn’s summer gaming series just at Walk/Trot. I used to ride low-level jumping courses. Competitive sports haven’t ever really been my thing, particularly to participate in. I would’ve called riding one of my hobbies while I did. It’s an expensive one though and a bit of a tricky one to get back into when balancing college and part-time retail work. My mom and I try to stick to our developed tradition of selecting a local trail riding venture to attend every year for my birthday though that keeps that connection outside of whatever I vicariously pick up through games, lol.

13. How tall are you?

5′5ish. A smidgen shy, but that’s what they put on my license.

14. Favorite subject in school?

Histories and sciences. If I wasn’t so averse to writing research papers and math, I have genuinely considered majoring in either area. Unfortunately, my university doesn’t have a program for meteorology (weather and natural events are a somewhat more recent interest of mine) and video games evidently have some staying power as my interests, so that’s how I ended up in DMD.

15. Dream job?

I’m honestly not sure anyone has a really solid answer to this question, lol. I certainly don’t. I... went into DMD partially because it was interesting enough and I genuinely felt college would benefit me somehow. While I like my pet store job, it’s not exactly where I’d like to spend the next twenty years, even if I am a creature of habit that balks at change, lol.

So, theoretically, I’m studying DMD and entertaining the idea of a minor in creative writing because characters have always been one of the most important aspect of games to me. The idea is to maybe pursue a focus on character or scenario writing, but I... really don’t know, lol. I’m still largely clearing prerequisites and other structural graduation requirements, so I haven’t really dug into the focus areas of my degree yet and I definitely still doubt that I know what I’m doing or if it’ll genuinely be something I can pursue.

It’s definitely scary and I absolutely struggle with that uncertainty, but it’s also a process of just trying to remind myself that it’s a skill and therefore it is something I can develop if I put the work in - that’s the whole purpose of taking classes, after all. It’s something I’m trying to be more conscious of because I have found it very easy to slip into the student mindset of doing things just for class, so I’m still not sure what all I have as far as presentable skills or how to showcase them. But that is... off the base question, I suppose, lol.

So, work in progress!

Uhhhhmmm, this one’s sort of a mix idk who to tag for, lol, so I think I’ll leave this one open? Muts/followers, feel free to say you’ve been tagged if you’d like to do this one!