#also CHECK OUT THE HAND ON LOVE WINS BISHOP

[20s-turtle-posting]

im so sorry this started as a haha funny idea but i put in so much effort I'm not sure it's a joke anymore

[omegalomania]

so im sure everyones fully well aware of the magic 8 ball site fob is using to promote a contest to win some tickets to see them in nashville. the little 8ball widget theyve got in browser is also modeled on the physical 8ball that they had in the vip merch packages for tourdust's first leg, which is cool! but of particular note is the way that, to fill out the contest form, you have to pick your favorite fall out boy songs. and the sheer breadth of what is allowed is...interesting? it's not cohesive by any means, but it is really wild the selection of songs they have here because not all of them are fob songs. in fact, quite a few of them aren't.

i went directly to the source code and got a full list of all possible songs that you could input (which you can check for yourself by right-clicking and selecting "view source"). i'm going to list them here for archival purposes, with a few notes/explanations cause some of these are WILD.

there are 187 songs total listed.

bolded songs indicate songs that are demos or never received an official release

italicized songs are songs by other bands

underlined songs indicate songs that are covers

songs with an asterisk beside them (*) indicate they are from patrick's solo catalogue. two asterisks (**) are for pete's.

additional commentary by me will be [in brackets]

20 Dollar Nose Bleed 27 7 Minutes in Heaven (Atavan Halen) 7-9 Legendary A Little Less Sixteen Candles, a Little More "Touch Me" A Nice Myth [one of the earliest fall out boy demos, found on their first ep, and only the casette version at that] Allie* Alone Together Alpha Dog America's Suitehearts American Beauty/American Psycho (song) American Made Art of Keeping Up Disappearances As Long as I Know I'm Getting Paid* Austin, We Have a Problem Baby Annihilation Bad Side of 25* Bang the Doldrums Beat It Big Hype* Bishops Knife Trick Bob Dylan Bounce [this is a song that came out on then-Decaydance labelmates The Cab's debut record, Whisper War, which patrick produced. he has writing credit and also is credited with background vocals (and also shows up in the music video)] Caffeine Cold Calm Before the Storm Centuries Champagne for My Real Friends, Real Pain for My Sham Friends Champion Check Your Phone** Chicago is So Two Years Ago Church City in a Garden Coast (It's Gonna Get Better)* Coffee's for Closers Cryptozoology* Cute Girls* Cyanide** [this is a nothing,nowhere song that pete did some spoken word parts and backing vocals on] Dance Miserable* Dance, Dance Dead on Arrival Dear Future Self (Hands Up) Death Valley Deep Blue Love* [song patrick did for the indie short film "spell"] Demigods Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes Don't You Know Who I Think I Am? Electric Touch [the (in?)famous taylor swift song patrick featured on] Eternal Summer Everybody Wants Somebody* Explode* Fake Out Fame Less than Infamy Favorite Record Fellowship of the Nerd [this is an alternate title for world's not waiting, as far as i can tell] Flu Game Flu Game [yes flu game is listed twice for some reason] Footprints in the Snow [demo from the Llamania ep] Fourth of July From Now on We Are Enemies G.I.N.A.S.F.S. Get Busy Living or Get Busy Dying (Do Your Part to Save the Scene and Stop Going to Shows) Ghostbusters (I'm Not Afraid) Golden Grand Theft Autumn/Where Is Your Boy Greed* Grenade Jumper Grow Up and Be Kids [this song is on The Cab's sophomore album Symphony Soldier, which release after they left decaydance. nonetheless, pete does have some writing credits on it. give it a listen and you'll hear for yourself in the first 10 seconds or so] Growing Up Hand Crushed by a Mallet [this is a remix of the 100gecs song of the same name; patrick did some vocals for it] Hand of God Have I Got a Gift for You* [song patrick did for the horror movie black friday] Headfirst Slide into Cooperstown on a Bad Bet Heartbreak Feels So Good Heaven's Gate Heaven, Iowa Hold Me Like a Grudge Hold Me Tight or Don't Homesick at Space Camp Honorable Mention Hot to the Touch, Cold on the Inside Hum Hallelujah I Am My Own Muse I Don't Care

I Got Nothing, But You Got Something [this is the one that really perplexes me. there's no evidence of this song actually existing, other than an unverified genius post and an article on a single fandom wiki. it is inexplicably listed here despite its very existence being questionable at best.]

I Slept with Someone in Fall Out Boy and All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me I Wanna Dance with Somebody (Who Loves Me) I'm Like a Lawyer with the Way I'm Always Trying to Get You Off (Me & You) I've Been Waiting [this is technically a lil peep song with fall out boy as a feature] I've Got a Dark Alley and a Bad Idea That Says You Should Shut Your Mouth (Summer Song) I've Got All This Ringing in My Ears and None on My Fingers Immortals Irresistible It's Hard to Say 'I Do', When I Don't It's Not a Side Effect of the Cocaine, I Am Thinking It Must Be Love Jet Pack Blues Just One Yesterday Lake Effect Kid (song) Lake Shore Drive [this is a song patrick covered on the piano at wrigley, first night of tourdust] Love from the Other Side Love Will Tear Us Apart Love, Selfish Love* Love, Sex, Death Lullabye Mad at Nothing* Miss Missing You Moving Pictures My Heart Is the Worst Kind of Weapon My Songs Know What You Did in the Dark (Light Em Up) New Dreams [this is a bonus track on pax am days, a naked rayguns cover] Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner Novocaine Of All the Gin Joints in All the World One of Those Nights [another song from the cab's whisper war. this one has patrick doing vocals very prominently] Open Happiness [this was a huge collaborative piece done for a coca cola commercial. patrick was on it along with big names like cee lo green, janelle monae, and labelmates travie mccoy and brendon urie] Our Lawyer Made Us Change the Name of This Song So We Wouldn't Get Sued Parker Lewis Can't Lose (But I'm Gonna Give It My Best Shot) Past Life [llamania ep] Pavlove People Never Done a Good Thing* Porcelain* Pretty in Punk Rat a Tat Reinventing the Wheel to Run Myself Over Roxanne Run Dry (X Heart X Fingers)* San Diego [this is a blink-182 song that patrick did some writing for] Saturday Saturday Night Again* Save Rock and Roll (song) Sending Postcards from a Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here) She's My Winona Short, Fast, and Loud Snitches and Talkers Get Stitches and Walkers So Good Right Now So Much (For) Stardust (song) So Sick [this is a song patrick has exclusively covered live, so it's a fascinating inclusion] Sober [another blink-182 song patrick did some writing for] Sophomore Slump or Comeback of the Year Star 67 Stay Frosty Royal Milk Tea Sugar, We're Goin Down Summer Days (song) [this is a martin garrix song patrick lent some vocals to] Sunshine Riptide Super Fade Switchblades and Infidelity Tell That Mick He Just Made My List of Things to Do Today The "I" In Lie* The (After) Life of the Party The (Shipped) Gold Standard The Carpal Tunnel of Love The Kids Aren't Alright The Kintsugi Kid (Ten Years) The Last of the Real Ones The Mighty Fall The Music or the Misery The Patron Saint of Liars and Fakes The Phoenix The Pink Seashell The Pros and Cons of Breathing The Take Over, the Breaks Over The World's Not Waiting (For Five Tired Boys in a Broken Down Van) This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race This City* Thnks fr th Mmrs (song) [for some reason the site specifies song here, despite that not being necessary. the only other times this distinction is relevant is when songs share a title with their albums, i.e. save rock and roll] Thriller Tiffany Blews Twin Skeleton's (Hotel in NYC) Uma Thurman Untitled 1 (Colorado Song) Untitled 2 (Jakus Song) [both of these are recently released tttyg era demos] W.A.M.S. We Didn't Start the Fire We Don’t Take Hits, We Write Them [this is a song that famously was only ever performed live. we don't have a studio recording or even a demo, as only live versions exist] We Were Doomed from the Start (The King is Dead) West Coast Smoker What a Catch, Donnie What a Time To Be Alive What's This? When I Made You Cry* Where Did the Party Go Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) Wrong Side of Paradise [llamania ep] XO You're Crashing, But You're No Wave Young and Menace Young Volcanoes Yule Shoot Your Eye Out

in conclusion i have no idea who compiled this list. it doesn't include every song patrick and pete have ever touched (notice the lack of gym class heroes, cobra starship, and hush sound discography) but it has a really weird selection of songs. i mean, blink songs patrick wrote on?? its bizarre.

anyway do you think if we mass request swing me by the rafters they'll have to do it

[hb-writes]

"I'm bigger and older now, you're no match for me!" - Mia to Edward?!

"You know, Edward…I'm bigger and older now.” Mia considered the chess board as she spoke, not bothering to lift her gaze to look at her brother across the board. “You're really no match for me anymore.”

Edward smirked at Mia's casual tone, watching her as she studied the board. He couldn’t read her thoughts, not when she was trying so hard to keep her shield intact, but when they played chess, he almost felt as though he could. As if he could see her mind playing through the potential moves and their repercussions. It helped that he'd been the one to help teach her to play, and that they played often enough that he was familiar with her moves, familiar with her manner of thinking even if he couldn't access her actual thoughts.

“Is that so?” Edward asked, smiling as she tentatively reached for her bishop only to pull her hand back at the last minute. 

Parts of what she’d said were technically true—Mia was both bigger and older now than she had been when they first taught her to play. And she had become quite a skilled player over the years, good enough by now that she and Alice were the only two who were any type of challenge for Edward. Part of it was because he couldn't read her mind, but that wasn't the only reason. She’d also developed a fairly impressive understanding of the game’s nuance, a certain style of play that kept Edward on his toes even though he had almost a century of practice on her. She had yet to win against him, but she’d come close a few times, and Edward had come to love their chess matches, a gift considering he'd become bored of the game since being changed.

“Mhmm,” she hummed, returning to the bishop she’d been considering just before and sliding it across the board. “None of you are much a match, actually.”

Edward tried not to smile at the opening she’d left, appearing to consider the board even though he'd already chosen his next move. “That’s quite a bold statement for someone who’s currently losing and has never actually won a match against me,” he answered as he shifted his queen across the board, allowing him to take her queen and trap her king. “That's a check, by the way.” 

Mia sighed as she looked at the board, looking there for a moment before meeting her brother's silly, triumphant gaze. She held it as she reached over the board, finding her rook and shifting it just a single space, into a spot with a clear, unbeatable pathway to Edward's king. “And that is checkmate,” Mia offered, holding her hand out across the table for him to shake. 

"Good game."

Edward shook her hand in somewhat of a daze, quiet as he quickly assessed the board and his mistakes, trying to determine how Mia had accomplished it without him seeing it coming. He snorted a moment later when he finally found it. 

“Genius,” he muttered, the word barely decipherable to Mia though Jasper and Alice had clearly heard it from across the house, both of them appearing suddenly at their side to look at the game board.

“What?” Mia asked.

Edward exhaled, shifting his gaze from the board to his sister. “I said you’re a genius. Good game, Mia.”

Twilight (Mia Cullen) Masterlist

[cherrypikkins]

Got my gold title screen :3 Here are the characters that helped me do it!!

This being my first Maddening Run (aside from two previously aborted Black Eagles runs), below the cut are are my thoughts and advice on how to beat it:

The requirements for a gold title screen are Maddening Mode with a new file. No NG+!. However, Casual is fine.

Equip everyone with Training Weapons immediately. This can prevent you from getting doubled by all but the speediest characters.

Training Weapons also last longer. Knowing this, spam Combat Arts to survive the first few battles.

Equip everyone with a bow early on. Curved Shot is your key to surviving the mock battle.

Equip everyone with a battalion as soon as you can. Gambits will save you in Conand Tower when you inevitably get hit by crowds.

Move and attack as a group during battles. Have majority of units nearby to help out when things get hairy. Note that tight formations will make use of links and supports, however you must be wary of enemy gambits.

Have all magic-users learn Heal. It's a Faith D spell you can pick up in no time at all. It gives easy exp and ensures that your mages can help your units survive the next turn.

Have danger zones visible at all times. Don't forget to check individual enemy danger zones.

Use the danger zone to plan your next move. The danger zone will show you where it is safe to retreat if your units are in danger. If you have a tank that can survive the danger zone, it can also be used to set up ambushes

Spend every weekend battling. You will need every bit of experience you can get. No seminars, no rest, no skip, explore only on the first week.

On a NG file, you will only have one activity point per weekend for battling. Work on getting your Professor Level up. Lots of fishing and lots of tournaments. I was able to get to Level A+ and 3 battle points per weekend by late game this way.

Use Tournaments to win money and free Silver Weapons+

Since you will be mainly using Training Weapons, buy Smithing Stones to upgrade them to Training Weapon+ and repair when needed.

Because you are spending less money on brand new weapons, you will actually have some extra money leftover - buy gifts to raise motivation and to recruit.

Unless you are doing Crimson Flower, prepare well for Hunting by Daybreak. Even on casual, you MUST have the majority of your original house members trained up.

Plant flowers for stat raising items and gifts. Everyone loves flowers!

Focus on a small group of units to train. By the end of the game, aim to have 12 units + 2-3 adjutants ready to take on the final map.

Overall, maddening on a new save file was super challenging but also a lot of fun for me that I can't wait to try it again with NG+. For NG only, it may seem impossible at times, but with luck and perseverance, you can do it! Hope that helps! Good luck!

The characters I used and their roles:

Barbarossa Claude: relied on him early on for Encloser to manage crowds, became a crit king late game.

Trickster Byleth/"Mousy": all-rounder who sadly doesn't excel in a whole lot late game, but was used for some key Foul Plays to help units flee to safety or reach their targets.

Sniper Petra: mid-to-long range crit, with the potential for Lethality, crit on Personal Ability and double crit on Hunter's Volley, which can trivialize certain monster fights.

Bow Knight Leonie: long-range crit, who can tank in an emergency if needed. Can break armor as an opener for other damage dealers.

Bishop Linhardt: dedicated healer who was a last minute recruit before the timeskip

Wyvern Lord Hilda: started out unremarkable early game but ended up becoming a nigh untouchable blink tank.

Great Knight Sylvain: defense tank. needed a lot of extra care and hand-holding mid game but eventually grew strong enough to be able to tank Nemesis of all things and lure him off the boss tile

Dark Knight Lorenz: used as an adjutant early-to-mid game, later brought on to the main group post time-skip to help fill the roster. Decent for tanking magical hits and cleaning up enemy survivors

War Master Felix: fragile frontliner early game, reliable boss-deleter mid-to-late game. since archers and mages can easily disrupt your plans in maddening, I relied on him to get rid of them quickly.

Dancer Marianne: was early game dedicated healer before that role got passed over to Linhardt. Aside from refreshing turns, she can do plenty of damage on her own. Her special Dance is useful for adding some extra punch and precision to Constance's Bolting.

Gremory Constance: had the absolute WORST luck with stats during each level up. However, she made it up with her frequent Crest procs - which means even more Bolting to go around.

Gremory Lysithea: as per usual a reliable Death Knight and boss killer. Aside from melting down mounted and armored knights, she can be relied on for extra heals.

[grandtheftgoose]

Unfinished warped tour dnf fic

I'm leaving so heres the self indulgent fic i wrote before leaving

The sun has been hot this summer, hotter than normal. Maybe the sun is hotter on Bishop stage than on Volcom. When he repeated these thoughts to George last night he just laughed.

“The sun doesn’t get hotter, idiot” he had scoffed, “it’s been warmer though.” They were on the balcony at the restaurant they were eating at, looking out at the sunset. Well, George was looking at the sunset, Dream was looking at George. 

“I love high fives again. Totally back in love” he had written on his blogpost, maybe it was too early to say but he was a songwriter after all. He wrote his feelings into songs that he sung to thousands, he knew feelings. He also knew he liked George. Looking at George under the hues of pink and orange made him realize how bad he wanted this. He wanted George and all his silly quirks. He loved his passion for music, quips, and silent affection. 

He wanted this so bad, he wouldn’t care about winning an award show ever again if he could have George. But he was scared to fall in love with a boy who wouldn’t love him back, more so he’s scared to fall in love and George stops loving him. So all his unspoken words to George went onto his livejournal page. 

George consumed his thoughts. Watching MCR during a set, it was George George George all the way down. Event in the heat of New Mexico, playing in front of thousands all he could think of was George.

George had kissed his cheek while they walked back to the buses. Blushing slightly before running up ahead to talk to Sylvee. Dream walked in a daze, almost stunlocked. Dammit George, you’ve done it again. 

Sapnap had stopped him before he could climb into the bus. 

“You really like him, huh?” Sapnap questioned, cocking his head.

“Are you gonna give me the shovel talk or something?” He looked out to the night sky, the stars shining above. 

“Well,” Sapnap spluttered, “that depends if you’re going to break my bandmates heart. We can’t lose our bass player.”

Dream scoffed, shaking his head. He wouldn’t even dream of breaking George’s heart.

“No way man. I really like him, "he murmured, his voice going soft.

“Good for you then,” he patted him on the shoulder, “don’t fuck this up.”

He just shook his head, heading into the van. I don’t wanna fuck this up either.

As he fell asleep in the humid van, all he could think of was George.

He woke up slowly, the lingering feeling of sleep leisurely leaving him. Somehow Dream felt even more exhausted than the night before. He grabbed a granola bar from the box, prepared to stay awake and write. Sam had only taken one look at him before ordering him back to bed. He slept the whole way to the next ground-site, the soft voices of his bandmates in the background. 

When he woke up, they were in Arizona. Which was just as hot as New Mexico, and he was just as in love. When he left the van to start soundcheck, it was humid and misty. He was lost in his head as they started sound check. Looking out over the grounds, The fog covered the campsite. It looks like a ghost town, he thought to himself. He strummed his guitar lightly while Sam and Puffy warmed up, and Bad chatted with a stagehand. They went over the set and a tricky part of “I slept with someone”, the sticky feeling left the air and Dream was starting to feel calmer. 

“Okay guys,” Bad exclaimed, clapping his hands together, “we’re gonna kill it like we’ve done all tour! We’ve got a couple hours til we go on, but please stay nearby. I’m looking at you Sam! It’s hot as heck out here, don’t wear yourselves out!”

“Looking at you Dream,” Puffy coughed, raising her eyebrows. 

He rolls his eyes, batting his hand at her. He’s definitely staying close since MCR is warming up after them. He looks out to the side of the stage where George and Sapnap are watching, Gia and Sylvee chatting behind them. He waves at George, smiling softly as George waves back. Sapnap elbows George then cups his hands, yelling “hey idiots, get off our stage!”

“Looks like our time is up,” Sam joked as he packed up his guitar. Dream just chuckles, shaking his head before moving to pack up his bass. After moving their equipment and clearing the stage, he sees George still waiting for him.

 He waves again before walking over, bumping their shoulders together. 

“Hey idiot,” George says smiling up at him, “you guys sounded pretty good out there.”

“Yeah yeah,” he says, batting his hand, “it’s just practice though.”

“Oh yeah?” he wiggles his eyebrows, “you guys sound even better than that? Guess I haven't heard it yet.”

Dream laughs. “Ooh, sick burn. Maybe you should watch our show today, see how good we can get.” 

George rocks backwards on his heels, “Maybe I will,” he hums, tapping his chin,“depends on my schedule. I’m super busy you know.” 

Dream chuckles, turning to look out to where the rest of MCR is setting up. Gia and Sylvee are talking to a stagehand they had made friends with the night before while Sapnap is watching him and George with a knowing look. Bad and Sapnap are going to be the death of me, he thinks t0 himself. Sapnap just wiggles his eyebrows before going back to setting up. When he turns back George is watching him with an emotion he can’t quite place. 

“I guess you should start warming up,” Dream prompts, “I’ll catch you later though.”

“You’ll watch our set right?” George cocks his head, smirking slightly. Watching other bands play on Warped Tour has made Dream realize why he liked music so much in the first place. Also because George looks hot when he plays the bass. 

“Yeah of course man,” Dream says, “after your show and mine we should hang out. I need some quiet, maybe we can take a nap in the van.”

“Wow,” George leers, “the great Dream wants to sleep with me huh? Take me out to dinner first idiot.”

Dream stammers, he can feel his face turning red. He feels so confident up on stage or interviews but everytime he talks to George, he turns into a mess. Like silly putty melting on the ground. 

“Can you two please keep it in your pants for once?” Sapnap shouts, saving him from his word vomit. “George get your ass over here and stop flirting, we need to start sound check!”

“Yeah George! Leave your boyfriend alone,” Sylvee heckles. George walks over to his band, speaking too softly for Dream to hear before looking back over. 

His face must be the color of a tomato now, but he just shakes his head and walks away. He heads down to where his bandmates are standing, grabbing a water from the cooler. 

“You’d think you were about to join my chem with how much you’re with them, man,” Puffy remarks. 

Sam jumped in, “Well, he’s definitely interested in something from George.” 

“Maybe that bass,” Puffy retorts, “when a bass player and a bass player love eachother very much”. She’s not wrong, he’s been spending a lot of time with George lately. It’s definitely not because he’s trying to join MCR though, he doesn’t want to think about what would happen if he and George became a couple. Them becoming exclusive would require them to define what they are, and George doesn’t seem interested in defining anything.

“What are we?” Dream had asked one night, “like everyone thinks we’re something and you’re the only person I’m interested in so like are we anything?”

George had responded “we’re you and me. George and Dream, that’s enough for me.” Before rolling over in the bus bed and falling asleep. 

So, no to switching to MCR or worrying about being a couple in different bands. Because they are not a couple, they’re just themselves. The ambiguity of it all is beginning to get to him, it makes him itch. Instead of voicing this to Puffy and Sam, he just laughs and moves to watch MCR. 

As he watches Sapnap jump around like a maniac, Bad moves to stand next to him. He studies Bad’s face for a moment, contemplating saying something before turning back to the band. They sounded incredible, even during sound check. Watching George play bass is always so incredible to him, he admires George and his music so dearly. He also looks hot playing bass. When he said as much to George, he just smiled. 

“Y’know,” Bad starts, “George isn’t the worst person you could be with. Like, he gets this whole being in a band thing, he’s very charming as well.”

Dream scoffs “thanks Bad.”

“No, I’m serious!” He exclaims, “being with George could be good for you, maybe you could write a love song.”

He thinks of the last pieces of a song he wrote for George. “Hot and miserable but totally in love.” Yeah, he could definitely get used to writing love songs for George.

“I think we’re just friends Bad,” he says, sighing. Good friends who have eachothers hands on belts in the dark and memorize the skin from his shoulder to his ear. 

Bad just smiles and pats his shoulder while heading upstage to talk to Sapnap while he just stands and stares at George. Sylvee catches his eye and waves him over.

“What did you think?” Sylvee rocks forward, “are we rockstar material?”

“Maybe you,” Dream jokes, “definitely not the other idiots.” They look over to where George, Gia, and Sapnap are standing. George and Sapnap are wrestling while Gia eggs them on. He can faintly hear George yell “get off me Stinknap”.

“Any chance you guys are looking for another guitarists?” She jokes, “or are you planning on stealing our bass player?”

He chuckles, shaking his head. “I don’t think he’d want to leave if I’m being honest.”

“Yeah, but you can offer something we can’t,” Sylvee wiggles her eyebrows, looking smug at her joke.

“I wouldn’t steal him from yall, he belongs on my chem.” Dream looks over to George, he and Sapnap have moved from wrestling to bullying Bad. 

“I guess we’ll keep him then”, Sylvee says, “but you’ve gotta stay nearby. He smiles more when you’re here.”

He thinks for a moment, he didn't think he meant much to George. He wants to ask George what he means to him, what they’re doing. He doesn’t want them to end when summer ends, but he’d rather it be a what-if than a heartbreak. 

Before he’s given a chance to answer Sylvee, the rest of MCR and his band have joined them. The eight of them are crowded to the side, way too much eyeliner in one place Dream thinks. While he was talking to Sylvee, Puffy and Sam had made plans to walk the grounds with MCR. 

“Are you walking with us Dream?” Gia asks, cocking her head slightly towards George.

He shakes his head, playing has woken him up more but he craves some time alone. “I think I’m gonna head back to the van and write some.” 

“If you need anything, we’ll be somewhere in here,” Puffy says while Bad starts to lead the rest of them away from the stage. 

“Be back at three!” Bad calls, “we need our bass player!”

“And that ass!” Sapnap yells, Dream walks off shaking his head.

He steps into the van, sighing as he sits at the table. It’s been a long couple of days, Warped Tour has been exhausting in the best way possible. He loves it so much but he’s so tired, his emotions have felt like a whirlwind. 

Pen to paper, right. That is what he needs to do with his emotions. He needs to write sad, emo bangers so they get invited to Warped Tour again, and because it’s the only way he knows how to map out his thoughts. 

Lately he’s been writing more on LiveJournal than he has in his notebook. Maybe one day Dream will be more careful about what he puts on social media, but at this moment he writes "hot and miserable but totally in love". 

[snelbz]

I'll Be Seeing You {4}

Nesta x Cassian, 1940′s AU

Collaboration with @tacmc​

Summary: After Cassian gets injured in the war, he’s taken to a war camp to be cared for until he gains enough strength to return to his battalion. While he’s there, he falls for a nurse that couldn’t care less about his title and doesn’t put up with his bullshit. Once he’s healed and the years pass by, he finds that there’s only one thing he wants to remember from the war, and she’s only a letter away.

Trigger Warnings: war

Chapters will be posted every Monday.

Word Count: 2429

IBSY Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist 

October 1940, The Autumn Court

Major Cassian Nazari was bored.

Nesta could sense it from where she was, back turned to him at the other end of the tent. It had also been a sign when she came in that morning and he was complaining, loudly, to Madja. I don’t see why I can’t get up and walk around. I’m fine. And bored shitless.

Madja, of course, had told him, Very well, Major. Do as you wish.

Cassian had taken two steps before a wave of nausea hit him from the pain, and he was throwing up his breakfast. After a dose of pain medicine, he had fallen asleep.

Now, he was awake, his pains were dulled, and he was loud.

Loud, and having a one-sided conversation with the unconscious soldier next to him about his favorite brands of whiskey.

He was just getting to the pros of living near a distillery, back in Velaris, when Nesta approached his cot. He glanced over to her and gave him a smile. A sleepy, drug-induced smile. “Nurse Nesta.”

“Major,” she replied, sitting next to his bed. “How are you feeling this afternoon?”

“Feeling great. Ready to get back out there.”

“Really now?” She asked, feeling his head for fever. He’d been warm after getting sick and she wanted to check and be sure they hadn’t missed some sign of infection setting in. His skin was cool as could be now. “So this morning was just a reaction to the breakfast porridge?”

He got quiet immediately and rolled his eyes.

“That’s what I thought.” She helped him sit up and checked the wounds on his back. They weren’t healing like she would have liked, but it was also likely he could have used stitches over a few of them. His burns were healing nicely though, even though she knew they still caused him quite a lot of pain. The broken arm and shoulder were the same.

Now that his shoulder was set correctly, it was all about keeping him still, which seemed to be a continual problem for him.

“I can’t sit here forever,” he claimed. “I’ll go insane.”

“You need something to occupy your mind,” Nesta said. “I’ll bring you some books.”

Cassian snorted. “Your romances? I’ll pass.”

Nesta huffed and shook her head. “Has anyone ever told you how difficult a man you are?”

“On many occasions,” Cassian noted. “Mostly women.”

Nesta sighed and helped him fall back against his pillows. “I’ll be back.”

“Good,” he muttered with a yawn as she walked away. After telling her fellow nurses she’ll be back in a moment, Nesta exited the tent and walked to the one just across the way from it, where the nurses slept. She strode to her tent in the far corner and grabbed an old western romance that he would surely read if bored enough, then pulled a suitcase from underneath her cot and popped it open.

The old, folded-up wooden chess board that sat inside had once belonged to her father. They used to play often, before the death of Nesta’s mother.

All the pieces were slightly dusty, but still in good shape. She picked up one of the ivory pawns, wiping it off with the apron tied around her waist, careful not to get any blood or antiseptic lotion on it. Without the dust coating it, the piece shined and she replaced it in its home before cleaning off each piece. She closed the suitcase, carrying it, the book, and a small, foldable tray back across the camp, and into the med tent.

As soon as Cassian saw her, he zeroed in on the case. “What’s that?”

“First,” she said, sitting down and holding the book out for him. “I brought you this.”

His face twisted with a twinge of pain as he reached out and took it, opening it and flipping through it. He paused on a random page and read a few lines. His eyes widened. “This is…explicit.”

Nesta’s cheeks reddened.

“It’s a romance,” he groaned.

“It’s an old western,” she defended. “It’s one of my favorites. It’s a very good book.”

Rolling his eyes, Cassian sat it on the side table, but pointed at the suitcase, which she had set down to unfold the tray. “And what’s that?” He repeated.

Nesta set it on the end of his cot and opened it. “Until I’m needed, we’ll play chess.”

Cassian stared at her for a moment before repeating, “Chess?”

She lifted a brow as she set up the board, on top of the tray. “You’re complaining about the forms of entertainment I offer?”

Cassian hesitated, and Nesta secretly liked that hesitation. For once, a comment made by her actually made him think. Usually, he was so quick on his feet. She liked it when he wasn’t.

“Fine,” he said, at last, clearing his throat. “But, it’s been a long time since I’ve played. You may have to refresh my memory.”

She suppressed her smile, moving the tray just next to his bed, so it would be within his reach. “I can do that.”

He nodded, grunting as he got himself into a sitting position. Nesta made a move toward him, but he held up a hand, letting him know he could do it on his own.

Even if it was just barely.

She laid out the pieces, almost reverently, but quickly and efficiently. She didn’t have to think about where the pieces went and before he knew it, the board was set in front of them. The white pieces sat on his side of the board, the black on her own. She gestured for him to make a move.

He reached for one of the pieces in the front, but then pulled his hand back. Twice, he repeated the movement, before clearing his throat and saying, “Ladies first.”

“That’s not how chess works, Major,” she chuckled. “White goes first, black second.”

He nodded and stared back down at the board. “Right.”

Picking up one of the pawns, Cassian moved it diagonally, as if it were a checker.

Nesta blinked, waiting for him to move it back or chuckle as if he were playing a joke. “That’s not how you move a pawn forward.”

His cheeks heated and she knew he was embarrassed. “Well not all of us grew up as well off as you were.”

Eyebrows raising, Nesta was unable to stop the surprised chuckle from bubbling from her lips. “Excuse you, sir?”

“I’m just saying, only spoiled, rich girls grew up playing chess.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, but couldn’t bring herself to be angry at his words. “You don’t know how to play chess, do you?”

“I told you I would need your help.” He wasn’t looking at her, just the board and pieces.

“When’s the last time you played chess?” She asked.

He shrugged. “Never.”

Nesta stared at him for a moment, waiting for an explanation. “Never?”

Cassian’s head fell back and he groaned. “Nurse, are you going to make me ask you to explain the rules to me or do I have to make a fool of myself any longer?”

Nesta pressed her lips together to keep from laughing. “Very well.”

She went on to explain the rules to him, then just to make sure she was not setting him up for failure, she explained the rules to him, again.

The pawn can move one square, unless it is the first time they move, then they can move two. It can’t move backwards. They can capture pieces on either space, diagonally, in front of them.

The knight moves in an L shape. Don’t ask why.

Bishop is a bit of a roamer. It can move in diagonally, as many squares as it wishes.

The rook can move both horizontally and vertically, as many squares as it wishes, as well.

The Queen is basically the best, most important piece. She can move however she wishes, wherever she wishes.

Cassian stared at the board thoughtfully. “Hmm. And the king, again?”

Nesta chuckled, quietly. “He can move only one square in any direction.”

“And he decides who wins the game?” Cassian asked, head cocked to the side as he stared at the board, trying to imagine it all.

“More or less, yes,” Nesta said, watching him study the board. “When a player attacks the other’s king, it’s called a check. A checkmate, or the win, is what happens when the opposing king can no longer make any legal moves.”

“So you must protect the king at all costs, then?” Cassian asked. “That’s the purpose of the other pieces?”

“It is,” Nesta nodded.

“And that’s why the queen is such an important piece?” he continued, meeting her gaze. “Why she has the most freedom? To protect her king?”

Nesta narrowed her eyes. “Speaking like that, I cannot believe that you don’t admire a good romance novel.”

“I already told you, I don’t think women are meant to stay home and do nothing but become mothers,” he replied, reaching out and moving his own piece properly this time. “However, a boring book about two people falling in love? No, thank you, ma’am.”

“Falling in love isn’t boring,” she defended, moving her own piece.

He grunted in answer, making his move.

Nesta looked at him, gauging his non-reply. “Have you ever been in love, Major?”

“Now who’s asking the personal questions,” he muttered, waiting for her to take her turn. She did, silently waiting for him to answer. He picked up the piece, studying the board, though barely anything had been done to need strategy yet. “No. I haven’t.”

Nesta watched him for a moment before looking back down at the board. “Interesting.”

Cassian moved his piece at last. “Don’t worry, plenty of women have been in love with me, I just haven’t returned the feeling.”

Nesta couldn’t help but bark a laugh. “Of course you would think so.”

Cassian’s grin told her it was all just a joke, but Nesta had no doubt that Cassian had had his fair share of women throughout the years.

“What about you?” He asked. “I know about your ex, of course, but have you ever been in love?”

It was Nesta’s turn to be quiet, but she pretended to be thinking over a move. “Yes,” she finally admitted, moving one of her knights, which had finally been unblocked by her pawns. “At least, I think so, at least. Things with Tom were…complicated.”

“Complicated doesn’t sound like it’s a good thing,” he replied, mirroring her own move.

She narrowed her eyes at him, finally catching on to how he’d been playing. She said nothing about the game though, and continued on. “There’s a reason we aren’t together anymore, if you recall.”

Nesta moved another piece and he asked, “Would you go back to him? If you found out he’d been waiting for you?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted, still staring at the board, if only to keep from having to look at him. “His family was much better off than mine, which was the reason for our engagement anyways. I came here to keep my sisters from having to do so.”

“That doesn’t sound like love,” Cassian murmured, taking his turn.

“And what makes you such an expert on the subject?” Nesta snapped.

Cassian slowly met her eyes once he set down his knight. He didn’t look offended by her tone. Instead, he remained quiet for a moment, then said, “I may not waste my time reading romance novels, and I may have never been in love, nurse, but I have plenty of experience in what love is not.”

She couldn’t place it, but she didn’t like why his voice became so…sad when he said it. “I didn’t mean to react in such a way,” she replied, not even paying attention to the moves she was making at this point. “I’m just not…accustomed to talking to anyone about these sorts of things. Especially a patient.”

He nodded. “I get it.”

Nesta nodded and broke his gaze as her eyes settled back on the board. After a moment, she moved her queen and said, “Check.”

Cassian blinked, eyes darting to the board, trying to find how his king was in jeopardy. Once he saw it, he tried to figure a way out of it, but after five minutes of thinking, he knocked his king down in surrender.

Nesta suppressed her smile as she outstretched her hand. “Good game, Major.”

He chuckled and shook her hand. “Nice lie, nurse.”

“Perhaps we can play again tomorrow,” Nesta asked, with a questioning tone.

Cassian met her eyes, and the edge in them softened as he said, quietly, “I would like that.”

She nodded and began putting it away as a few nurses entered the tent with big boxes in their arms. “Looks like we got some care packages from Velaris, gentlemen.”

Cassian’s brows rose, and Nesta chuckled at the excitement that flooded through the tent from those who were awake. In a war, it was the little things that made it all better.

Nesta placed the chessboard beneath Cassian’s cot and rose to help the nurses go through the boxes. With everything they pulled out, there was an announcement.

We’ve got candies!

Homemade breads and jams!

The funnies from the newspapers!

Tea!

Nesta reached into the box and pulled out a big carton and announced, “Cigarettes!”

That one got a round of applause, but nowhere near the number of cheers that the whiskey got. It went on for another few minutes, and then for the first time in quite some time, something that resembled joy could be felt in their little war camp.

As the goodies were dispersed, Nesta’s eyes kept trailing to Cassian.

She was surprised to find his eyes on her as well. Carrying one of the small bottles of the cheap whiskey that had been sent, she found herself standing beside his cot. She set the bottle down on the side table, along with a pack of cigarettes, and said, “Might not be the brand you prefer, but it’s better than nothing.”

“I’d drink anything right about now, brand doesn’t matter,” he chuckled. “If you could possibly get me some of that sweet bread and blackberry jam though, it might make it just a bit easier to go down.”

She shook her head, saying, “You’re unbelievable.” But she knew she would get it for him, she’d make sure of it.

Because his smile was the first thing that made her own appear without being forced in quite a while.

[hihellogoodbyebruh]

I Know What You’re Thinking, You’re On My Mind (You’re Right)

Pairing: Angel Reyes x Black!Plus Size!Reader

Summary: Y/N and Angel are in love and these are different moments in the span of their relationship.

Warning(s): Just a lot of fluffy goodness....okay some angst (it’s me lol) but mostly fluff

Word count: 2,526

AN: This is kind of a songfic, but also not really? I think of it as a bunch of drabbles loosely connected by random parts of a song. Song title and inspo from Come Close by Common ft. Mary J. Blige. The sweetest little fic I’ve ever written. Fat Black girls deserve to be loved loudly. This is for us. As always, questions, comments, and concerns are welcomed. Happy reading lovelies! xo

Smile, happiness, you could model it And when you feel opposite I just want you to know Your whole, being is beautiful I'ma do the best I can do Cause I'm my best when I'm with you

The sound of a domino being slammed on the table caused several other park goers to turn their heads and see a striking woman jumping out of her seat.

“That’s domino bitches! Y’all really thought you could beat me in dominoes? Shoulda checked my credentials mofos!” Y/N shouted, a huge smile on her face as she talked shit.

The guys around the table all groaned and huffed as she celebrated her win. Coco swore up and down that he would be the winner and Gilly was just as sure that he would be the one. EZ just wanted to play and Angel kept his mouth shut knowing his girl had been playing dominoes with her father and uncles practically all her life.

“Whatever, Y/N. You not seeing me in poker.” Coco grumbled, though he was fighting to keep a smile off his face. He was impressed.

“Well this aint poker is it? Run me my money.” She replied, rubbing her fingers together before holding out her hand.

The men all pulled out their wallets and placed the correct amount of money into Y/N’s hands. She grinned as she fanned herself with the money before draping her body across the smirking Angel’s lap.

“Oh hey there sexy. If you’re nice I might buy you something with this considerable fortune I just won.” Y/N winked.

“You my sugar mama now?” Angel teasingly asked.

“I do taste sweet so I think I fit the description.”

“Damn right you do.” He smirked, before leaning down to kiss Y/N’s lips.

Santo Padre’s mayor, Antonia Pena, had put together a community fair to help raise money for the town and uplift spirits. It was also a great way for local businesses to showcase what they have to offer. Services and items were put into a raffle that everyone who attended the event got entered into. Y/N even managed to convince Felipe to have a little booth to show off his fine cuts of meat and how they could best be used in meals.

Angel was so in awe of her. She managed to pull even his grumpy ass father out of the house and she was constantly a source of light in his life. He doesn’t know how he got so lucky, but he knew he never wanted to let her go. He loved her more than anything and he knew she felt the same about him. She never doubted him or made him feel inadequate. She understood even the ugly parts of him. Didn’t excuse or condone his behavior, but she understood it and always reassured him that she knew he could do better.

“Whatchu staring at?” She asked, after the kiss ended and he kept his intense gaze on her.

“My whole world.” He answered honestly and she felt herself get a little emotional.

“If you make me cry in public, I will hurt you.”

“Don’t threaten me with a good time.” He replied, nipping at her shoulder and making her grin.

I know in the past, love Has been sort of hard on you But I see the God in you I just want to nurture it Though this love may hurt a bit

Neither of them had the best track record when it came to relationships. Angel had an awful habit of doing things without thinking about the consequences of his actions. Impulsive isn’t a strong enough word to describe how he is. He runs on emotion a lot of the time. It frustrates Y/N to no end. She doesn’t operate like that. She rarely if ever acts on impulse. She thinks too much. Worries too much about how people will react to her and her actions. Her hesitance to engage in things before she’s run every possible scenario through her head makes Angel want to pull his hair out. He hates seeing her unsure of herself. He makes it his mission to help her just get lost in the moment sometimes. And she tries her hardest to slow him down and make him think more on things before he acts.

His lifestyle also guaranteed their love won’t always be sunshine and roses. The first time Angel got hurt Y/N thought she was going to pass out. The level of panic and fear she felt almost took her down. When she finally got to see him in the hospital bed, she burst into tears. Once he was healed, she tried to pull away from him but he wouldn’t let her. The one time Y/N was verbally and physically accosted in front of Angel, he almost shot someone right in front of her. The need to protect her almost overrode his need to keep her away from the more violent side of himself.

The silence was deafening. Neither one was ready to take the first step and speak. The whole ride back home, Y/N never said a word. Not when Angel was getting chewed out by Bishop or when several people practically gawked at her even as they tried to make it seem like they weren’t. She was silent as she went through her nightly routine and prepared for bed.

It was as she sat on the edge of the bed, preparing to slide under the covers that Angel finally snapped.

“You’re really not gonna fucking say anything?” He practically growled at her, glaring at her from where he stood at the foot of the bed. He had on his usual sleepwear of a tank top and sweats.

She sighed, “What do you want me to say Angel?”

“Anything. Cuss me out, kiss me, or I don’t know, maybe thank me?” He suggested, sarcasm in his voice at the last part because he was clearly exasperated.

She cut her eyes at him fiercely. “Thank you? You want me to thank you?”

“Yes.” He stubbornly confirmed.

She shot up from the bed and spun to face him full on. She had never been so mad at him. “Thank you Angel for causing a bigger scene. Thank you Angel for almost igniting a war between two gangs over one stupid joke. Thank you for putting yourself in harm's way and almost giving me a heart attack. Thank you so much Angel.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it. It wasn’t just a stupid joke. You think I care so little about you that I wouldn’t fuck someone up for you?”

“I’ve heard way worse..” She argued, so used to minimizing her pain. Her dismissal of the incident as something trivial made him even more pissed.

“I don’t give a damn what you heard. Aint nobody gonna disrespect you in front of me and think I’m just gonna let that shit slide.”

“You could have killed him.”

“I DON’T GIVE A FUCK.” He exploded, making her freeze and stare at him with her mouth slightly open. “You’re mine. I don’t know what kinda cowards you been dealing with before, but I don’t play that shit. There is no joking when it comes to you. Not from some hijo de puta who has the audacity to put his hands on you. He’s lucky the only thing I did was bust him in the head with my pistol.”

“Angel…..” She sighed, her eyes closing as she took in his words. She understood his point but was still uncomfortable with the methods.

He walked over to her and cupped her face in his hands. He kissed her forehead before resting his head on hers. He spoke only after she opened her eyes, “You can be mad. I already know you are, but I’m not apologizing for protecting you.”

She had to get used to being loved and protected so adamantly by someone. So often left to comfort herself and bury her hurt, it took her a while to accept Angel’s form of protection. A part of her kept her guard up waiting for him to turn it against her, but that day never came. Any violent outbursts he had in her presence were never directed at her and so she found herself trusting him whole-heartedly. Her love for him deepened as time moved forward.

You helped me to discover me I just want you to put trust in me

Y/N loved Pops and she enjoyed the family dinners with him and EZ, but she knew he was not the perfect father. He made mistakes and Angel still hasn’t completely dealt with the issues the mistakes left him with. Everything just got buried. She knew when he was starting to feel inadequate or like he didn’t deserve her because he would become even more clingy. He was already very affectionate with her, always having a hand on her back and kissing her head. She loved how open he was, but when he was going through it the touches would have a desperate edge to them. Like he was trying to prove something.

A new episode of Joseline’s Cabaret played on the tv showing off the Puerto Rican Princess’ latest antics. Y/N had on sweats and a tank top as she laid on your back and giggled at the fight on her screen. She doesn't know why she watches that show, but it was entertaining.

Her front door opened and in walked the man she’d been seeing for a year now.

“What did I tell you about leaving this door unlocked?”

“I knew you were coming over so why would I lock it?” She argued, tilting her head back to watch Angel toe off his shoes and take off his kutte.

“You’re so hard headed.” He slapped the outside of her thigh and leaned in for a kiss before lying in between her legs. His head rested on her stomach and her hands immediately began running through his hair. His hands ran over her thighs as he buried his face in her belly and just breathed her in.

“You walked right in so obviously I was right.” Her hands moved from his hair to slide down his back, feeling for any new bruises. “How was your day? Do I gotta kick someone’s ass for messing with my man?” She asked, a teasing tone to her words even though she was kinda being serious.

“I’m all good, mi dulce.” He responded, already knowing her touches were to comfort him but also give herself some peace of mind that he was with her and he was still whole.

It was quiet for a moment before Angel propped his chin on her belly and looked at her. She brought her attention from the television to him. There was a gentle look in his eyes, full of love but also a vulnerability that made her heart clench.

“You love me right?” He gripped her hips tightly as he searched her eyes for the truth in her words.

Her eyes widened at his question. “Of cour-”

He interrupted her. “Because I love you so damn much, querida. I know I’m not easy, but I try to be better for you.”

“Angel…” Her hand gently caressed his cheek as she softly smiled at him. “You are my favorite person in this whole world. You love me like no other and I’ll always love you. Never forget that. And when you do, I’ll be here to remind you.” She leaned forward to kiss his lips and felt his grip on her hips loosen.

The two shared loving kisses for several minutes before he pulled away and kissed her stomach before laying his head back down. His attention finally focused on the television. “What the fuck are you watching?”

She was unable to contain her giggles.

I kind of laugh when you cuss at me The aftermath is you touching me

“Oh, is that funny? Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Not at all gorgeous.” His words and his facial expression did not match.

“Then why are you smirking? I’m as serious as a heart attack. If you miss the ceremony where I’m awarded for my work, we’re gonna have some big problems Reyes.” She threatened, not letting that smirk get to her as it usually did. The club pulled him away a lot but some things she just needed him present for.

“Mmhm…how big?” He asked, still joking around.

“Angel!” She admonished, striking out to punch him in the stomach and making him grunt.

“You know I love when you scream my name. Sexy as fuck.” He growled, before playfully tackling her to the bed. She finally laughed as he kissed and nipped at her neck. He pulled back to look down in her eyes. “Hey, come hell or high water Imma be there. I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”

The smile she flashed him was bright enough to light the darkest of nights.

I'm tired of the fast lane I want you to have my last name

Dabbing her eyes with a napkin, Y/N smiled as Angel and EZ shared a heartfelt hug after the best man speech. She knew EZ’s speech would be beautiful and she thanked him for his kind words.

“You’re my sister for real now.” He responded, making her wanna cry again but she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before Angel pulled her into a side hug.

“First dance time.” He whispered in her ear, taking her hand and leading her out to the dance floor.

“How does it feel to be Y/N Reyes?” Angel asked, his eyes taking her in. She looked so magnificent in her wedding dress. He wanted to rip it off, but also he couldn’t take his eyes off how good she looked in it. If he shed some tears when she walked down that aisle, who could blame him?

“It feels like the most natural thing in the world. I’m so beyond honored to be Mrs. Angel Reyes.” She responded, her eyes filling with happy tears but she refused to let them fall. She just felt so overwhelmed with happiness. Even though he’d long gotten rid of the jacket, she loved that he actually wore a suit. He hardly ever wore one and it was a damn shame. He looked so delicious she couldn’t wait for them to get back home.

Y/N found herself really taking the moment in. Their family and friends watched them with huge smiles on their faces. She couldn’t keep her eyes off Angel for long as he held her in his arms, his hands always making her feel safe. This was her life and he was her future.

Her eyes twinkled as she asked him, “Ready for forever?”

Come close to me, baby (Yeah, love) Let your love hold you (Let me hold you tonight, babe) I know this world is crazy (It gets crazy, but I'll be right here) What's it without you? (We gon' make it, I love you, I love you, I love you)

[enamoured-x]

Sweet Release | Part 2

Angel Reyes x Reader

Summary: Things don’t go as planned when you attend Ez’s party. 

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, Angst

Word count: 4.8k

Excerpt: “Your salvation and your destruction kneeled before you, ready to prove to you how deadly the mix of the two was. Your angel on his knees ready to sin.”

*gif is mine!

a/n: thank you for all the love on this mini series! With that being said there will be a part 3 and it will be the final part! Enjoy! (part 1 can be found here)

Part 2

One long fucking month. Since the day you left Angel at the clubhouse with his come leaking out of you, you had been a wreck. Honestly, you were proud of yourself for holding it together so well when you broke the news to him. Maybe because you knew eventually you’d break. You were a mess. Hating Angel for what he put you through, hating that he led you to walk out on him in the first place. He tried calling every day for the first two weeks and then it simmered down to a call every few days. None of which you answered. For some reason you couldn’t bring yourself to block his number just yet. You still cared for him, still wanted to be able for him to reach out if something was wrong as long as it didn’t pertain to your failed relationship. You didn’t want to talk about how stupid that logic was because you knew keeping his number was because a part of you still wanted it to work. 

You played with the idea of maybe. But you couldn’t tell him that because you weren’t sure. You put yourself through all of his shit already and if he was going to do it all over again if you gave him a second chance you’d kill him. It would kill you. With that being said, you were going to let this play out. You knew you were supposed to get over him, knew you made a choice that day to end it with him. But a girl could dream that he’d make some grand gesture to win you back like in the movies, but this wasn’t a movie and Angel definitely wasn’t the romantic male protagonist. 

“Angel’s a mess.” You glared at Ez for bringing him up. You ignored his comment and sipped your coffee. You and Ez still kept in close contact over the month, sharing funny videos and checking in, just the usual stuff. Today he invited you to hang out and catch up since you hadn’t seen him since that day and you had agreed, happy to go somewhere that wasn’t work or your home. Happy to see your friend again.

“How’s pops?” You asked, trying to get the topic off Angel. You weren’t here to talk about Angel, he made his bed and now he could lay in it. If you were open to the idea of giving him a second chance, and that was a big if, he would need to do a lot more than having Ez tell you how miserable he’s been. You had been a wreck long before you broke up with him, he deserved to know what it felt like. 

Ez sighed and didn’t bring up Angel again, “he’s fine, he sends his best.” You nodded, making it a point to stop by soon and say hi, just because you and Angel broke up didn’t mean you couldn’t be friendly with his family still. They were practically your family. 

Ez twiddled with his coffee cup and you sighed. 

“Go ahead.” You told him, crossing your arms and leaning back in your chair. The outside seating offered you a breath of fresh air you desperately needed when talking about the one and only Angel Reyes. 

He stopped his movements and looked up at you, “what?”

“You obviously either have an opinion on the breakup or you told Angel you were meeting me and he asked you to tell me something for him. Hell, maybe you only asked to hangout with me to deliver a message. Whatever it is, spill it, Reyes.” You knew Ez enough to know when something was on his mind or when he was holding back. This was one of those times. You weren’t exactly mad at him for it but after your grief died out, you were just confused about Angel. You knew you made the right choice at the time but it didn’t mean you still didn’t miss him. It didn’t mean you were over him. 

Ez held his hands up, “I swear I just wanted to see you. No secret motive. If Angel wants to work things out with you, he can do it himself, I'm not his messenger.” You sighed. You knew he was telling the truth. 

“There’s something you’re not telling me.” He was still holding back. He may not be there for some ulterior motive but there was something. 

“You know I’m getting patched in…” He trailed off and you nodded your head. You were excited for him when he told you the news a few weeks ago. Ez had put all his time and effort in the club and he was finally going to become an official member. He deserved it. 

“The club is throwing me a party.” He stated and you shook your head. 

“No.” He scoffed at your answer and sat up. 

“Come on, you have to come. You don’t have to talk to Angel, just stay with me the whole time.” He begged. You groaned at the idea. 

“Ez, I don’t know. I don’t think it’s the best idea.” Showing up to the clubhouse just a month after you broke up with Angel and fucked him in the middle of it was probably not the greatest idea. 

“Please. You’re my only friend outside of the club, I want you there.” Ez’s brown eyes pleaded with you. You were his only friend and as that friend you owed it to him to show your support, even if it meant having to see your ex again. 

You bit your lip and Ez smiled, knowing he had you. 

“Fine, but I’ll be glued to your side the whole time you’ll regret asking me to come.” You pointed at him and he laughed. 

“This should be fun.”

You should’ve taken that as a warning. 

You hated the fact that you were putting effort into what you were wearing to the party. Trying on basically all the clothes in your closet. You figured if you were going to see Angel you had better make it good. Eventually you settled on a simple red summer dress, flowy enough to be innocent but short enough to showcase your legs. You opted for some white sneakers with it, deciding that you were definitely not going to dress up to this thing, Angel or no Angel. Either way, this night wasn’t about him or you, it was Ez’s night and you were going to be there to support him. 

Your nerves got the best of you when you pulled into the packed scrapyard, Chucky directed you where to park and you took a deep breath before stepping out. The party was already in full swing, people scattered outside and around the fire, already drinking and having a good time. 

“Hey, you made it.” Ez said as he walked up to you as you made your way toward the clubhouse. You had yet to spot Angel and you were thankful for it. 

“I told you I would come.” You pulled him into a hug and he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and then led you inside. 

“Thought you might back out last minute.” He shrugged. You were about to say something when you saw him. The man who had taken up space in your mind this past month. The man you left after reaching one last high with him. He was laughing at something Coco said, his smile not reaching his eyes. You could tell that what Ez told you had been true, that he was miserable. He looked good, just not all there. Both men were standing against the wall, what stirred jealousy in you was one of the club hang arounds to his left touching his arm. You swallowed hard, you forgot that before you and Angel got together, he was a hot commodity amongst Vicky’s girls. Now that he was off the market, you were sure the women were jumping at the chance to share his bed, they probably already had. Lead filled your stomach once again. 

You were about to turn to Ez to take the beer bottle from him when Angel finally looked over and stopped in his tracks. Gone was the smile and in its place was shock. You stared back at him, into those dark brown eyes you loved so much. Seeing him stung more than you cared to admit but you held strong. 

“You good?” Ez’s words snapped you out of your trance and you turned to him, finally taking the bottle from his hands. 

“You didn’t tell him I was coming?” You asked him as he led you over to take a seat at the bar. He looked guilty. 

“If I had he probably would’ve been by the gates waiting for you. Figured this was better.” You couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Hermosa, haven’t seen you in a while.” You turned around to face Bishop. A genuine smile lit up your face and you got up to hug him. He graciously accepted, giving you a tight squeeze before letting you go. Bishop was always so kind to you, always so supportive of yours and Angel’s relationship. 

“Hey, Bish. How are you?” 

“I’m doing good. How are you? Which Reyes brother are you really here for?” He teased you and Ez chuckled. Obviously the club knew about yours and Angel’s split but he still welcomed you with open arms despite it. You were thankful for it. 

“Very funny, but I’m here for Ez.” He laughed and placed a kiss on your temple before excusing himself. 

“Is he still looking over here?” You asked Ez, bringing the bottle up to your lips and taking a sip of the cold liquid. You welcomed the alcohol as it sat in your stomach. 

“Yup and Vicky’s girl does not seem too happy about that.” You felt a sliver of satisfaction run through you. But Angel wasn’t yours, you made that clear. So you had absolutely no right to be jealous, you had no claim over him anymore. At least not in that way but with the way you felt his eyes on your body, you knew you still had some sort of pull over him. He had that same pull over you but tonight was not the night for that. 

“Let’s get you drunk, Eziekiel. You deserve it.” You changed the subject. You weren’t going to sit here and talk about Angel who was a few feet from you during Ez’s party. No, you were going to celebrate the man of the hour. Your friend, arguably your best friend. Also arguably your only friend. 

“Sounds good to me.”

Ez was a bit tipsy but not nowhere near drunk after many rounds of beers and a few shots. You on the other hand kept it to three beers and then opted for some water, not really one to drink all that much. That didn’t mean that you weren’t having fun though. Coco had eventually came over to talk to you during the night and you were glad none of the men held any animosity towards you. It felt nice to see them again and you could honestly say you were glad you came. 

“Six o’clock, mamas.” Coco said and nodded behind you, you were turning around completely ready to see Angel. You were surprised he hadn’t tried to get your attention sooner seeing as how he still tried to contact you weekly. But it wasn’t Angel. The man who now stood in front of you was a stranger, albeit a very handsome stranger who was part of another charter by the patch on his vest. He was tall enough to tower over you, his dark eyes pulling you in. He ran his hand through his raven black hair and smiled at you, even with his facial hair you could still see prominent dimples. 

“Hello, sweetheart. I’m Jay. And you are?” He stuck his tattooed hand out for you to take and you took it into your own. Jay was a tall glass of water, honestly a wet dream. Just not yours. But he could be. At least for tonight. A rebound wasn’t a terrible idea but you guessed there had to have been some rule about finding a rebound at the party of your ex boyfriend's brother’s party while he stood just a few feet away. You still introduced yourself nonetheless. You were a bit too distracted to notice Coco and Ez had left you to your own devices. 

“So, what brings you to this party?”

“I’m a friend of Ez’s.” You told him. You swore you could still feel Angel’s eyes burning through you, you had felt it since you locked eyes with him. Whether he was giving you your space or he really didn’t want anything to do with you tonight, you didn’t know. But judging by the same girl who was still trying to get his attention, you figured he wanted nothing to do with you tonight if it meant him getting laid. 

“Hmm,” he looked you up and down and you shifted under his gaze. You were kidding yourself if you actually thought you’d go through with a rebound. Especially with a Mayan. And you were kidding yourself if you thought a rebound was going to help. As if it was going to magically make your feelings for Angel disappear. As if sleeping with a stranger was going to give you that release you needed again, no, only Angel could do that. You hated it. 

“So, this party is dying down, I was thinking maybe you wanna get out of here?” That was extremely forward, all he knew about you was your name. But who were you kidding, guys like him didn’t care, hell, you’d be lucky if he even remembered your name. You were just about to turn him down when he trailed his hand up your thigh skimming just under your dress. Your eyes widened at the gesture and you shoved him off you and backed up.

“Woah, what the fuck.” You hissed quietly, not wanting to make a scene. He laughed.

“Oh, come on. You're not here for Ez, you’re here to get laid.” What the fuck. You were about to tell him off before a hand wrapped around your waist and a warm body pulled you into his side. You didn’t even have to look to know who it was but you looked up anyways. Angel. Your damn angel.

“You touching my girl, homie?” He asked him, ice in his tone. You were surprised the guy wasn’t on the floor already, Angel’s girlfriend or not, he didn’t like people touching you if you weren’t willing. Maybe he knew punching a guys lights out right now was no way to win you back and it was definitely not needed at Ez’s patched-in party. 

“Nah, man. Sorry, I didn’t know she was yours.” You scoffed.

“I’m not anyones.” You weren’t going to cause a scene but you hated men like this, men who thought women were just objects. You felt bad for the girl he would somehow convince to go home with him. 

“Get fucking lost or we’re gonna have a problem.” Angel told him, fingers tightening on your waist. Your skin ignited at his touch, at him being so close, at his cologne infiltrating your senses once again. It all felt like home. You hated it. The guy held his hands up as he walked away mumbling curses under his breath. Before you could say anything to Angel, he was whispering in your ear. 

“We need to talk. Now.” He didn’t give you room to argue as he led you down the hall and into his dorm room, closing the door. You didn’t like this. You didn’t trust yourself to be alone in a room with Angel right now. Give it another month or two then maybe, but right now? When your breakup was still a month fresh? No. It was dangerous. Angel turned to face you and you crossed your arms looking anywhere but at him, not wanting to look into his eyes. Not wanting to lose yourself in him. 

“What do you want to talk about?” He laughed bitterly, shaking his head. 

“Us. You coming here dressed like that.” He motioned to your dress.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Angel. What’s done is done.” You explained, biting your lip. Seeing him one foot away, eyes locked on you, it was a bit too much. One month was not nearly long enough to get over Angel Reyes. Hell, you didn’t think any amount of time would be sufficient. He was a damn drug, one you couldn’t stay off of.

“So you came here to torture me? Rub it in my face? I fucking miss you and you come to my clubhouse and act like everything’s cool? Act like I didn’t mean shit to you?” He was angry, that was easy to see. But you could tell his tone carried a deep hurt, one he was desperately trying to contain. Your heart ached. You wanted him to hurt, at first. But now seeing him, seeing the desperation and anguish in his eyes? This wasn’t what you wanted. You didn’t like hurting the people you loved, even if they hurt you. 

“Angel, that wasn’t my intention. Ez asked me to come and I wanted to support him. I’m not trying to hurt you.” You explained, stepping closer to him. That was also dangerous, you should be on the other side of the room, not a few inches away from him. 

“Too fucking late.” He ran his ring cladded fingers through his hair. 

“What do you want me to say, Angel? You hurt me, you didn’t make time for me. Our relationship was over long before that day.” It was the truth. You subconsciously knew your relationship was over with Angel before you had officially broken it off. You were just too scared to admit it to yourself, too desperate to hang onto the hope that he’d actually show up for you. But he never did and you knew it was time. 

“I know, I fucked up. I know that. But what you did that day… that was cold.” You chewed on your bottom lip. Part of you did feel bad for giving him a false sense of hope that day, using him for your release and then dropping him. But you needed to end the relationship on a high note, end it with a sweet goodbye and not a bitter storm of curses, in the end it was all just bittersweet. 

“I just… I needed you, Angel. I had missed you so much and I needed something…” You couldn’t find your words but you knew he knew what you meant, even if that day hurt like a bitch for him. He stepped forward, making a move to grab your arm but you backed up and shook your head. 

“Mami, please…” He begged, this time you went still as he grabbed your arm with one hand and cupped your cheek with the other. Your body buzzed to life at his touch, like Angel flipped a switch and you were back on again, like you were just being dragged through life this past month on auto pilot, like he had finally given you the reins back to your body. 

“Angel…” You were weak, your wavering voice gave you away. He leaned forward, his lips grazing yours slightly, his warm breath mingling with your own. You felt giddy as he surrounded you, as he invaded everything you were once again. And when he pressed his lips to yours, you melted into it. He licked along your lips and you opened your mouth, tongues sliding against each other. You moaned into it and grabbed onto his vest, trying to steady yourself at this heady feeling he gave you every time his lips were on any part of you. His hand slid to your waist and you had half a mind to snap out of your daze. You pulled away and he craned his neck, trying to chase your lips. You pushed on his chest lightly, wanting him to stop. 

“No, Angel, we can’t…” You couldn’t get hurt again. You couldn’t just fall back into him just for him to keep you at home waiting up for him and waiting on his call, and when neither came you’d be right back where you started. 

“Querida, I love you… I need you.” He whispered against your cheek. Hearing him say those words only made your heart ache worse and only made you want him more. It was damn confusing. You wanted him but you couldn’t put yourself through that shit again. 

You knew what he meant. I need you. He didn’t just need a release, he needed you. Just like that day you broke up with him, you needed him to give you that high but you quite plainly just needed him. 

“Fine. Let’s fuck and then go our separate ways.” You said, pulling him in for another kiss, needing the distraction. Not wanting to think about how fucking stupid that offer was, how fucking stupid you were. Sex wasn’t going to do anything but fill your base desire, it wasn’t going to give you back that piece of your heart that was ripped away from you when you left. He didn’t let the kiss go on more than a few seconds, pulling away, confusion and despair written all over his face. 

“What?”

“Fuck me, Angel. We need it.” You stated plainly. He shook his head and backed up from you. 

“No. I need you.” His words pricked another pain in your heart. 

“Then take me.” You offered. You were sure you had lost your damn mind. But you wanted Angel, maybe it wasn’t exactly the way you wanted him but you’d take it. 

“Fuck no. That’s not what I want.” You sighed, he wasn’t making this easy. Because it wasn’t what you wanted either. Yeah, you were desperate to feel him inside you again but it’s not truly what you wanted. 

“That’s all I can offer.” Your words came out softer than you planned, sadder. He scoffed, running his hand down his face. 

“You want a release, mami? I’ll give you one, but you’re not getting my dick. I can’t… I can’t be inside you without wanting to stay there. Can’t give you that if I know you’re just going to leave again.” You weren’t sure what he was offering. But it didn’t matter because he was more upset than he had been just a few moments ago. 

“Angel…” You shook your head not knowing what to say. Fuck, if he fucked you right now you wouldn’t want him to go anywhere either. But that wasn’t your reality. The reality was that he fucked up and sex didn’t fix it the first time and it certainly wasn’t going to fix it this time. 

“I’ll make you come on my tongue, and then you can walk out that door but you’ll walk out knowing only I can take you to heaven.” You swallowed hard at his words as he crowded your space again. Your breath hitched as he pulled you into his chest, making you look into his eyes. 

“I’m not going to stop. Not gonna stop calling, texting, not gonna stop until you give me another chance to prove to you how much I fucking love you. But right now, I’ll give you what you want. Even if it kills me.” And with that he slid to his knees. Your whole world stopped at the confession, at him kneeling before you, ready to worship you in a way only he could. The sight of him on his knees, the rush you felt as he trailed his hands up your bare thighs, it was like no other high you had ever felt. Your salvation and your destruction kneeled before you, ready to prove to you how deadly the mix of the two was. Your angel on his knees ready to sin. 

His lips trailed up your thighs and you threw your head back, steadying yourself by placing your hands on his shoulders. His warm breath getting closer to the place you needed him most had your core clenching around nothing, had you squirming, waiting for him. 

“Fuck…” You breathed out as he lifted your dress to get his mouth right on the skin above your panties. You bit down hard on your bottom lip as you felt yourself getting wetter at his teasing. His lips skimmed your stomach before he forcefully yanked your panties down, a contrast to his gentle and slow movements. You gasped at the action but before you could react further, he buried his face in your pussy, throwing one of your legs over his shoulder in the process. You yelped at the sudden intensity, at his wet tongue sliding through your folds and flicking against your clit. 

“Oh god.” You cried, grabbing onto his hair and grinding yourself into his face. He let you, following your movements, never relenting, never taking his mouth off you. Heaven. He wasn’t wrong, only your angel could take you there. 

“Missed your taste. Missed you.” He mumbled against your slick. He said the last part so quietly you almost didn’t hear him, but you did. You heard him and it stung but the pleasure he was also giving you was overpowering your thoughts on his confession. 

“Feels so good, Angel.” Your words spurred him on as he trailed his tongue to your hole, fucking you. You whined at the intrusion and rolled your hips and pulled his head in deeper. You were drowning again, or flying, or possibly dying. It felt too good, felt too sweet to be anything but something so fucking dangerous yet so damn exhilarating. 

You were so lost in your pleasure you almost didn’t notice the door open, Angel obviously didn’t, head still buried in your pussy. The head that peeked around the door was the same woman who had been trying to fuck Angel all night. Her eyes widened at the sight and you should’ve felt embarrassed, but all you felt was that satisfaction again. Angel was here with you, on his goddamn knees for you. Pleasuring you and wanting nothing in return. At your mercy. Your head clouded with need at the thought, not because he was here with you and not some other woman but because he’d only ever do this for you. 

You moaned a little louder and the girl snapped out of her shock and displeasure as she awkwardly closed the door. 

Now that she was gone, you were once again focused on your man. Not your man. Angel said this would kill him, he didn’t know it was going to kill you too even if you got your release. 

“Gonna come…” You cried as he flicked your clit with his tongue. You were yanking at his hair, which only made him moan and made for a sweet vibration on that bundle of nerves. You rolled your hips against his face faster, nearing the edge. The sounds his tongue and your slick were making were enough to put a porno to shame and it only brought you closer. 

“Come, let me take you there.” Heaven. You could see it behind your eyelids, could fucking feel it as your orgasm finally shot through the surface, taking you sky high. You let out a litany of curses mixed with his name, eyes watering at the intensity of your high. Earlier you didn’t know if you were flying or drowning, what you realized now was that you were flying and drowning. A mix of gasping for air while simultaneously flying right through it. 

Finally you caught a breath as your climax started to fade, Angel still licking his way through it with gentle strokes. You whined as you finally came down, finally came back to this world. He lapped you up slowly and then placed a small kiss to your clit before pulling away and looking up at you. Your breath shook as you looked into his eyes, as he kept your gaze and laced his fingers through yours. You let him. Not having the energy to fight him. He knew what this was, he said it himself before he dropped to his knees. It made you feel slightly less guilty about only taking and not giving. 

He finally got to his feet. You saw the tent in his pants but he adjusted himself and cursed under his breath. He didn’t seem to care about that though as he looked at you. You didn’t like the look. A look that held a lot of promise. His beard was slightly damp from your come and your core throbbed at the sight. He licked his lips as if he knew what you were thinking about and took your face in his hands. 

“Forgive me.” He whispered, desperate again. You knew what it was. He said he’d get you off, nothing to it, but of course there was a small part of him that thought you’d change your mind after another orgasm. 

“No.” Your words stung him, you could tell. But his face hardened and you thought he’d pull away. But instead, he stroked your bottom lip with his thumb.

“You will.” And with that promise he was walking out the door, leaving you more confused than ever. 

Taglist: @starrynite7114​ @xladymacbethx @fear-less-write-more @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @glimmerglittergirl @vicmackeybullshxt @miss-nori85 @blessedboo @kalimont83 @ctrlbitch​ @angelreyesgirl​ @langiinspirations​ @lilac-tea-time​ @melancholymelanin​ @-im-fantastic-​ @withmyteeth @isisafrofairy​ @elektriknachosss​ @krysiewithak​ @thegirlwhoisalwayswriting @mental-bycatch​ @smurfflynn​ @blackmissfrizzle​ @arination99​ @bucky-iss-bae​ (if you want to be removed from the taglist for this fic pls let me know!)

[lia-jones]

Resistance - Evol: Chapter 23 - Owen

Author's note: To @ashisbored, who gave me the brilliant idea of writing an Owen-focused chapter. I hope I did it justice. Lots of love to you, my dear.

Also, dear readers, if you haven't read chapter 22 yet, scroll down. This is the second chapter of the week.

Of all the days of the week, Saturday was definitely Owen's favorite. There was always something fun to do on Saturday, and Mom and Dad were always at home, their phones and laptops off and put aside.

When he didn’t have soccer matches, which were always exciting because he got to see his friends and Dad would always take him for ice cream after, he and his family would go to the market and find something tasty to cook for lunch. But there was something that he absolutely loved, that didn’t happen on a Saturday. It made him jump with joy as he put all his ‌schoolbooks into his backpack. The weekly chess game.

“I’m coming.” He ran to the living room, finding his father watching an old movie while holding a glass of whiskey. “I’m here.” He panted, smiling.

“Are you done with homework?” His father looked for the remote, turning off the TV.

“Yes.” He nodded enthusiastically. “I only had an assignment from Mrs. Burton. The rest I did at the hotel.”

“Let’s go then.” His father carefully removed the chess game from the cabinet, careful not to drop the pieces. “I believe yours were the whites?”

“Yes, and it was your turn to play.” Owen sat across from his father at the dining table, the chess game between them.

“If I recall correctly, I was about to get your horse.” His father teased, holding a piece in his hand.

“But you can’t, or I’ll get your bishop.”

“Well done.” His dad smiled. “You are becoming a very interesting adversary.”

“Yeah, Mom’s not really good at it.” They both chuckled.

This was what Owen loved about the chess games. He felt like a true gentleman, just like his father, playing a game of intelligence and strategy as they bantered and teased each other. He felt like the man he wanted to become, all that he could see in the adult in front of him: smart, elegant, strong.

His father paused again, lost in thought. But it was probably not about the game, his eyes weren’t fixed on the board as usual. He was sipping his whiskey again.

“By the way, how is she?”

“Mom?”

Dad cleared his throat, moving his piece to defeat his horse. Owen’s eyes focused on the board again, trying to figure out his father’s plan.

“And your bishop is gone.” Owen removed the black piece from the board.

“Is she doing well?”

“You don’t know?” Owen waited impatiently for his father’s next move. 

“She has been busy finishing her thesis. We have little time to talk.” 

“Yeah, she’s been staying up late working all week long.”

“How do you know?” His father frowned. “Aren’t you supposed to be in bed sleeping by that time?”

“I woke up thirsty one night.” He shrugged. “It’s your turn.”

Dad turned to the chessboard again, although he didn’t seem as interested anymore. He moved his tower. Owen smiled.

“I’m going to win.”

“What else?”

“What else? I’m getting your tower and putting your king in jeopardy.” Owen moved his tower. “Check.”

“What else about your mother? Is she just working, or is she doing something else?”

“I think she’s taking Krav Maga lessons again. I heard her talking to Levi on the phone.”

His father looked at his watch, drinking the rest of his whiskey.

“Maybe we should put the chess game aside for now and start dinner.” He took the chess board and returned it to its place in the cabinet.

“But I was winning!”

“Check is not a win. You don’t know what tricks I may have up my sleeve. I may still save my King.”

“You’re right.” Owen pouted. “Can we have pasta for dinner?”

“Macaroni and cheese with broccoli?” His father raised a brow.

“Yes!” He beamed. “Can I help?”

“Can you grate the cheese without hurting yourself?”

“Yes, sir!”

“Fair enough. I’ll have you as my sous-chef and evaluate your performance later.”

Owen loved cooking with his father. He had an apron just for him, and his father would always make an italian accent every time they cooked pizza or pasta. Mom would always joke and say he was a mustache away from being a Super Mario, which always made Owen laugh and his father blush, pinching her arm playfully.

And although it was fun to cook with his dad, his mom wasn’t there, so it wasn’t as fun.

“You sound like Super Mario!” Owen teased on his mother’s behalf.

But his father didn’t blush, and he didn’t tease him back. He pursed his lips, turning them into a sad smile.

“It’s better when Mom is around.” Owen pouted a little.

His father turned to the sink to wash the broccoli.

“You’ll see her again tomorrow.” He spoke after a long time.

Owen remembered the time Mina died, and his mother told him that maybe he should not bring it up for a while, because missing someone can hurt very much. So Owen dropped the subject, grating the cheese instead. It was clear Dad was missing Mom too.

“My name is Owen Lee and I live in Loveland. I have already lived in many houses. The first house I lived in was with my biological mother, who died when I was little. Then I moved to the orphanage with Miss Dillon, and she found another house for me, but the lady didn’t like me very much. So I went back to live with Miss Dillon again and the other kids until I found my forever family. So I moved to my Dad’s house in Loveland, a large apartment in a building that even has a caretaker, Mr. Andrews. He gives me candy sometimes. But now, my Mom has become really busy with work, so she needs another place where she can focus, so I have two places to live now. One is the hotel apartment where I live with my mother, and the second is my father’s apartment, where I used to live forever. The end.”

“Very good, Owen, good job.” Mrs. Burton patted his head. “Anyone have any ‌questions to ask Owen?”

“Are your parents divorced?” Jenny raised her hand.

“No, they’re not.” Owen explained. “It is only an experiment, because Mom has a lot of work to do and she needs to focus. It’s only temporary.”

“Is your father very loud?” Michael chimed in.

“No, I don’t think he is.”

“Then why can’t your mother work in the same house as your Dad?”

“Yeah, don’t your parents work at the same company?”

Owen froze, not knowing what to say. He didn’t fully understand the “experiment” his parents were in, he just knew what they had told him.

“Alright, children, maybe we should leave the questions for later and go to recess.” Mrs. Burton intervened. “Go get your snacks from Mr. Linton at the cafeteria and I’ll see you in 30 minutes.”

Owen sat by the cherry tree, absentmindedly turning his apple in his hands. His friends were waving at him from afar, but he didn’t feel in the mood to play soccer. Jenny sat next to him.

“It’s ok if your parents are having a divorce.” She looked at him. “It’s not as bad as it seems. My parents are divorced. Timothy’s parents are divorced too. And Gary’s mom is already married to another man.”

“My parents are not getting divorced.” Owen shook his head. “My mom wouldn’t lie to me. She would tell me if they were.”

“Ok.” Jenny shrugged.

“How is it like?” Owen eyed the girl sideways. What if she was right?

“Well, my mom explained that sometimes adults stop loving each other and they go live different lives. It’s kinda cool, actually. You get two Christmases, and you get a lot more presents. And they spend more time with you, when it’s just you and them.”

Owen let out a sigh of relief. No way Mom and Dad had stopped loving each other. He could see that they missed each other. If they missed each other, it could only mean that they still cared. And as he came to that conclusion, the subject simply slipped his mind.

Mom was the one picking him up from school that day. He almost missed her among the crowd of parents piling up at the school gate. Her curls were gone, and her hair was a little darker.

“Mom!” He threw himself into her arms.

“My little bug, I missed you so dang much!” She picked him up, throwing him in the air. “How was school? I want to know everything about it!”

“Your hair is straight!” He picked up a strand of her now light brown hair.

“Just trying something new.” She smiled. “How do I look?”

“You look beautiful!” He beamed at her. “Dad won’t recognize you when he sees you, you look so different!”

His mother gave him a soft smile, putting him on the ground.

“I thought we could walk home to the hotel today, maybe pick up some takeout on the way.” She took his hand as they started walking. “What do you feel like eating?”

“I had pasta yesterday with Dad. He made the Italian accent.”

“Nice.” His mother chuckled. “So no Italian food today. What else can we have?”

“Hot dogs?”

“Hot dogs are not very healthy, Owen. Can you think of something else you’d like?” She stopped. “Oh, hi, Levi.”

“Hey gorgeous!” Levi was suddenly standing next to them, pulling his mother for a hug. “And hi, little guy, how are you?”

Owen remembered Jenny’s words, and how she had told him Gary’s mom was married to another man now. And then he remembered how his father got the last time they ran into Levi. He immediately hated him.

“Fine.” He answered grumpily.

“Oh, is someone having a bad day?”

“I’m not sure…” Mom looked at him, frowning.

“Anyway, I hope to see you this week.” Levi shook Mom’s shoulder. “You slacked for a while. Your posture needs working on.”

“I’m not sure I can make it this week.” She tried to keep Owen steady as he pulled her arm.

“Is your husband working you hard? Gotta tell Victor you need some me time too.”

Oh, the audacity. Owen just wanted to kick him in the shin.

“I want to go home, Mom.”

“Just a second, Owen. We are on our way.”

“But I want to go NOW!” He screamed.

“Owen!”

“It’s ok, I should go too.” Levi pulled her for another hug. “I do hope to see you at the gym!”

Owen watched Levi leave with a sense of duty fulfilled. He would make sure that guy wouldn’t get near his Mom again.

“Are you ready to explain what happened just now?” His mother turned to him, looking slightly mad.

“I’m sorry I was rude.”

“You were very rude.” She scolded him. “But I’m more interested in why. That’s not like you at all.”

Owen looked downed, feeling ashamed. Yes, he had done the right thing by scaring the other man away, but still he had been impolite. His father would surely had done it differently, elegantly, without getting a scolding in return. He hadn’t been a gentleman at all. Mom walked with him in silence, crossing the park where Owen usually played soccer with Dad. She took him aside to sit on a park bench.

“Did you have a bad day at school? Did someone pick on you?”

“No.” He shook his head, afraid to ask the question.

“Come on, Bug.” Mom stroked his cheek. “Whatever is bothering you, you can tell me.”

“I don’t like staying at the hotel.” He finally confessed, his eyes glued to the ground.

“You don’t like it there? You’d rather stay somewhere else?”

“Why do we have to do an experiment?”

“I told you, Bug. I need a little while to be alone to think and to focus on my thesis.”

“Why can’t you do it at home? I promise I’ll be very quiet, and Dad will be quiet too. We can make the meals and do all the chores and you can just stay in your study and work.”

“Owen…”

“I just want to go home.”

His mother paused, making him look up. She looked sad.

“You want to stay with Dad?”

“No, I want to stay with you and Dad!” He grew frustrated. Why couldn’t she understand him? “I don’t want you to get a divorce.”

Mom blinked at him. 

“Where did you hear that?”

“Jenny says adults sometimes stop loving each other, and they go live in separate places. It’s called a divorce. And then we get two Christmases, and sometimes the mother marries another man.”

“I see.” She nodded. “So your reaction with Levi…”

“You’re not marrying him, are you?”

Mom laughed. That made Owen’s heart feel a lot lighter.

“Levi? God, no.”

“You’re not divorcing Dad, are you? Or make me have two Christmases.” He looked her in the eyes, trying to understand what she was feeling. “It’s nothing like that, right?”

She paused.

“No, it’s nothing like that.” She got up from the bench. “And you know what? I actually feel like having hotdogs. As long as we have some soup before.”

“Deal!” Owen jumped. “Can it be carrot soup?”

“Sure, we’ll stop by the grocery store…” She turned to her purse. “Wait, I’m getting a call.” She looked at the phone, slightly confused, answering it. “Victor?”

She listened silently while his father spoke on the other end of the line, her expression turning to a worried one as she looked at him.

“I’m sorry, buddy.” She gave him a sad smile. “It looks like we’re not having hot dogs after all.”

“How do you want to do this?” Dad held the cardboard box.

Owen held his mother’s hand.

“We make a hole in the ground and we bury him.” Owen said. “Did you bring some candles?”

“I did!” His mother took some small candles from her purse.

His father took the small gardening tool, digging a shallow hole and inserting the cardboard box in it.

“Do you want to cover it?” He turned to Owen.

“Yes.” Owen kneeled on the ground. “Mom, light the candles, please.”

He covered the box with dirt, and Mom lit two small candles, placing them next to Mr. Lobster's burial place.

“He lived a good life.” She smiled at Owen. “He was a happy lobster.”

“Do you want to say any last words?” Dad spoke as he wiped off the dirt of his hands.

“Yes.” Owen closed his eyes, feeling the solemness of the moment. “Mr. Lobster, when I first came home, you were my very best friend. You couldn’t say anything back, because lobsters can’t talk, but I know you listened. And while I was still getting to know Mom and Dad, you made me feel less alone. I don’t know if God has a heaven just for lobsters, but I hope He does. And if He does, I’m sure you are there. Thank you for being such a good friend, I will miss you.”

Owen heard a sniffle behind him. Mom and Dad were tearing up.

“It’s ok.” He smiled. “I’ll miss him, but he had a good life. And I’m pretty sure lobster heaven exists.”

Owen was sad, but he knew that most of all, it was important for him to be strong. He wanted his parents to be proud of him and not to worry. They looked so sad already, even before Mr. Lobster died. He wanted them to be happy.

“What do you feel like doing now, Bug?” Mom kissed his forehead. “Should we get home?”

“Can we still go for hot dogs?”

“Of course we can.” She smiled, offering her hand for Owen to take. “There’s a place on the way home. Go kiss Dad goodbye.”

“Can he come too?”

Another pause. Mom and Dad glanced at each other, using that silent language only they knew, and Owen couldn’t understand. After a while, Mom spoke.

“Sure he can.” She smiled. “Would you like to go with us for hot dogs?”

“It will be my treat, then.” He motioned them to follow him to his car. “I’ll drive. I know a place that has the best hotdogs in town.”

After a short five-minute drive, they were sitting by the lake, enjoying the hot dogs Dad had promised. And he was absolutely right: they were delicious.

“Now that’s something I never thought I would see.” Mom joked. “Victor Lee shoving down a hot dog.”

“This isn’t just any hot dog. This is the hot dog. Artisanal bread and sausages, exquisite relishing…”

“How come we never came before? They really are delicious.”

Owen observed his parents, the initial tension between them gone. It felt good, just like before.

“We always preferred to cook at home, together.”

“Which is how we got the lobster in the first place.” Mom laughed.

“What does cooking have to do with Mr. Lobster?” Owen asked, intrigued.

Again, Mom and Dad looked at each other, the silent communication between them.

“Well, you know some people eat lobster, right?” His father started. “Like some people keep fish as pets, and still we eat fish sometimes.”

“That’s because they are ignorants.” Owen countered. “They don’t know how cool lobsters can be, and how smart they are. Mr. Lobster always greeted us when we got home.”

“Yes, he did.” His father looked at his hotdog.

“But what does cooking have to do with Mr. Lobster?”

“Well. In all honesty…” His father hesitated.

“Back when we were dating, your father took me to this restaurant.” Mom chimed in. “And Mr. Lobster was inside a tank, waiting to be picked by a customer to be cooked. But I started looking at him, and felt sorry for the poor guy, so Dad bought the lobster, took him home and kept him as a pet, saving him from the pot. And that’s how we got Mr. Lobster.”

Owen’s heart swelled with pride.

“You saved him?!?” He smiled at Dad. Dad looked at Mom, a surprised look on his face.

“He did.” Mom nodded. “He knew I would be sad if Mr. Lobster died, so he saved him for me.”

“Dad’s a hero!”

“He did something pretty special, yeah.” 

“So did you.” His father replied.

Owen had no idea what they were talking about anymore, but it didn’t matter. They were smiling at each other, with that look in their eyes, and that was all that mattered.

Owen felt his eyes getting heavy on the way home, the motion and silent buzz of the car pulling him into relaxation. As his eyes were closing, he heard his mother talk.

“Poor little guy. This was a rough day for him.”

There was a beat of silence, and Owen almost drifted off, until he heard his father speak.

“Did you tell Diane?”

“No. Did you tell Goldman?”

“No, but he asked about you. Which was exactly what led me to think you didn’t tell his wife.”

“I thought maybe… At least until we know exactly what we want to do, maybe we shouldn’t tell anyone. You know, to avoid any gossip.”

“Until you know exactly what you want to do. I already know what I want.”

“Victor…”

“You put us in this position. You are the one who needs to figure things out.”

“Fine, sure, let’s disregard all the lying and all the secrets and just blame it all on me. I can take that.”

Another beat of silence.

“That’s not… I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok, I don’t want to fight either. Not today.”

“I agree.”

“Your hair looks different. It looks good on you.”

“Thanks.”

“I’m actually the one who should thank you. For covering up for me.”

“In the end, it was a very nice gesture. It doesn’t matter how it started.”

Silence filled the car again.

“You’re still wearing it-” His father almost whispered.

“So are you.”

“Like I said, I know what I want.”

Even with his eyes closed, Owen couldn’t help but smile. His parents still loved each other. Mom hadn’t lied, it was just an experiment, and it probably wouldn’t last long. They wouldn’t get a divorce.

And that knowledge lifted the heavy weight from his heart. He just wanted to have one Christmas. One with his family together.

[drabbles-mc]

Fifty Bucks

Bishop Losa x Reader

Request from the babe @masterlistforimagines: Reader and Angel made a bet that she couldn’t last without having sex with Bishop for a week so she keeps “running” away every time her and Bishop get close to having sex. In the end, she lasts a week, collects her money from Angel and Bishop then finds out and takes her to Templo and has sex with her then. Oooh but I want Bishop to literally pick the reader up and bring her into templo and also the crew to hear them going at it

Warnings: language, (unprotected) sex, dominant Bishop giving all of us life

Word Count: 3.7k

A/N: Sometimes you have to write Bishop smut at midnight on a Sunday and that’s totally valid. This was incredibly fun to write so I hope y’all enjoy it!

Bish Tag: @sincerelyasomebody @sadeyesgf @thesandbeneathmytoes @tomhardydallasstarsgirl @multiyfandomgirl40 @sillygoose6969 @queenbeered​ @louisianalady​

“No way you could do it,” Angel laughed as he leaned back in his chair.

You scoffed, shaking your head, “I could totally do it. One week? Easy.”

He took a sip of his beer but you could still see the smirk on his face, “Alright then. What’s the bet? Twenty bucks?”

You rolled your eyes, “If I’m gonna go a whole week without having sex with my boyfriend you gotta at least make it worth my while. A hundred.”

He immediately shook his head, “No fuckin’ way.”

“If you’re so sure you’re going to win it shouldn’t matter, right?”

“Fifty,” he paused, “And no getting yourself off either.”

“Ugh. You’re the worst. But you’re about to make me fifty dollars richer so fine,” you held your hand out to shake on it.

He grasped your hand tight in his, “Oh, and you can’t tell Bish. Don’t want him taking it easy on you to help you win a bet.”

It wasn’t going to be a fun week for you, but you figured it was going to be a manageable one. You and Bishop had a healthy sex life, and you immediately started brainstorming ways to get out of sexual situations with him, which was something that you never thought that you would have to be doing. For most of the time that you’d known him, you were trying to figure out how to get in to sexual situations with him. This all felt foreign and also wrong.

Monday evening rolled around and you were in the kitchen making dinner for the two of you. You felt his chest press up against your back as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pressing his lips against your neck. Your legs went a little weak as you gave in slightly to his touch.

“How long ‘til it’s all ready?” he mumbled, his scruff tickling the sensitive skin of your neck.

You smiled, shaking your head, “Not too long.”

“Long enough?” his hands slid down into your shorts, his fingers pulling your panties off to the side.

Ordinarily you would have said, “Fuck it, let dinner burn and we can order in when we’re done,” but you had fifty bucks on the line. And also your pride. You spun around so that you were facing him and you repositioned his hands so they were no longer on the inside of your shorts, “Not this time. Can you grab some plates and cups from the cabinet, please?” you smiled at him.

Confusion crossed over his face for a moment but he did as you asked. You let out a quiet sigh of relief at one avoided situation. You knew how persistent he could be, though, and you had the feeling that you were in for a very long week.

You figured that Bishop assumed that you weren’t in the mood, because for the rest of the night he didn’t push it. The two of you were cuddled up on the couch after dinner and for the first time in a long time he didn’t try to get handsy with you. Part of you hoped that he would keep this up for most of the week so you wouldn’t have to try and dodge him.

Too bad you hardly ever get what you hope for. The next morning you woke up to Bishop’s fingers lightly trailing along your sides and thighs, his lips pressing against your neck. You giggled, still feeling heavy with sleep. He pulled you back against him and pressed a firm kiss onto your jaw.

“Good morning, sweetheart.”

You turned so that you were facing him, forcing your eyes open all the way, “Good morning.”

He leaned in and pressed his lips to yours, one hand snaking up behind your neck to keep you pressed against him. You moaned lightly into your kiss as your hands came to rest against his chest. He attempted to pull you on top so that you were straddling him and you caught yourself right before you let him. You peeled yourself away from him, hating everything about the stupid bet that you had made with Angel.

“I gotta get ready, I have an early meeting today,” you kissed him on the lips and cupped his face for a moment, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he placed his hand over yours. You could see it in his eyes that he wanted to say something but he stopped himself.

After work, you ran home to throw on a more comfortable set of clothes and then head over to the clubhouse. You knew that the guys would all be there, and you figured that if you were out of the house, the less likely it would be that you would end up in a sexual situation with your boyfriend. It wasn’t completely out of the question, but it definitely put the odds in your favor a little bit more.

You were sitting at the bar, scrolling absently through your phone when you felt a pair of hands press down hard on your shoulders. Angel’s laugh filled your ears, “You owe me fifty bucks yet?”

You huffed, rolling your eyes, “Not yet. Only two days in and I feel like it’s been two weeks,” you glared at him as he sat down on the stool next to you, “You’re the fucking worst by the way.”

He laughed as he took a beer off the surface of the bar, “You could just pay up now and be done with it. Go home with Bish and get your back blown out. Fine by me.”

You laughed and gave him a firm but playful shove, “No fucking way. I’m not gonna let you win this.”

“You two all good over here?” Bishop appeared, gently resting his hands on your hips.

You looked up at him with a smile, “We’re fine.”

He leaned down and gave you a quick peck on the lips, “No beating up my new secretario. I need him…for now.”

“Damn, Pres, that’s cold,” Angel chuckled. He waited for Bishop to walk away and pick up a conversation with someone else before he turned back to you, a smug grin on his face, “Not as cold as you’re gonna have to be for the next five days, though.”

“Again, I say, you’re the worst.”

Wednesday night you were in the shower, lip-syncing to your playlist and rinsing off what had been an incredibly long day. You heard the door creak as it was slowly pushed open. You smiled to yourself and stuck your head outside the curtain. Bishop was standing there, a grin plastered on his face as he watched water drip down the sides of your face. He walked over and pressed a kiss to your dripping forehead.

“Got room in there for one more?”

Your entire face got hot. You desperately wanted to say yes, but you knew that it would, most likely, lead to the two of you having sex. But you also knew that saying no was going to set off some type of alarm bell in Bishop’s head.

“I was actually just about to hop out. Water’s starting to get cold,” you hated lying but it was the only way you could think to say no without having to actually say no. If he was annoyed, he was very good at hiding it. He placed one extra kiss on the tip of your nose before leaving you to get out and dry off. You let out a sigh of relief when he shut the door behind him.

Thursday was your only day of rest because you and Bishop hardly saw each other at all. You had to leave early for work, and by the time he got home from dealing with the club, you were passed out and he was too exhausted to try and wake you. You stirred slightly when he got into bed but didn’t stay awake for long after you felt his arms wrap around your waist. Within seconds he was snoring and you happily drifted back to sleep.

Bishop walked into the bedroom on Friday night and whistled when he saw you standing in front of the mirror, checking your hair and makeup. “Where are you going,” he walked up and snaked his arms around your waist, “dressed like this?” he kissed your shoulder, “And can I go with you?”

You laughed, shaking your head, “Girl’s night, remember?” you rested your hands on top of his, “I told you about it last week. Some of my college girlfriends are in town so we’re all going out tonight,” you gave him a look through the reflection of the mirror, “No boys allowed.”

He smiled, squeezing you lightly, “What about men?”

You chuckled, “Still a no from me, Obispo. Sorry.”

“Fine. I’ll be here waiting when you get home, though,” he kissed your neck.

The contact made your whole body ache, absolutely hating that you haven’t been touched by your boyfriend in five days. “I’ll text you and keep you updated, okay?”

He nodded, “Have fun.”

It was around 2AM when you called Bishop from your friend’s hotel room, telling him that you were staying the night with them and that you would be home in the morning. He offered to come and pick you up, he offered to get you an Uber, but you told him that it’d just be easier to crash with the girls and come home in the morning. He didn’t like it but it accepted it, asking you to please text him first thing in the morning so he knew that you were alright.

You stumbled through the door early Saturday afternoon. Your hair was a mess and your head was pounding. Bishop was nowhere to be found, and his bike hadn’t been in the driveway either. You grabbed some comfy clothes to change into and made your way to the bathroom to shower. There was a note on the counter next to a bottle of aspirin and you smiled as you read it.

“Sorry I can’t be there when you get back. I’ll be home tonight. Hopefully your hangover will be done by then. I love you.”

You were sprawled out on the bed on your stomach, half asleep with the television on in the background when you heard the sound of Bishop’s boots in the hallway. You turned so that you were facing the doorway and he smiled at the sight of you. He stripped down to his boxers and crawled onto the bed. He positioned himself so that he was straddling you, situated right above your hips. He pushed up the fabric of your shirt (his shirt) and started to rub gentle circles into your back. You smiled, humming in approval as you all but melted into the mattress at his touch.

“I’m assuming from the volume of the television that your head still isn’t feeling great?” he chuckled as his hands worked their way up to your shoulders.

You smiled, “I’m alright. I’m not that old yet.”

Somewhere along the way the massage became a lot more than just a massage. For a moment you were wondering if just oral would break the bet with Angel. But you had less than twenty-four hours and you were so close to winning. You were a terrible liar so if you caved you wouldn’t be able to hide it from Angel.

Bishop had your panties pushed halfway down your legs when you pulled your lips off of his, placing a hand on his chest. His hands stilled as he looked down at you, concern all over his face when he saw your expression, “Everything okay, sweetheart?”

You nodded, “Yea. I just, you know,” you paused, trying to string together the right words to safely derail this situation, “you think you could just hold me for a little bit?”

He repositioned himself so that he was lying on his side facing you, “Of course,” he pulled you up against him, “You feeling okay? You’ve felt far away lately.”

You smiled up at him, nodding, “Yea, I’m okay. Just in a cuddly mood…is that okay?”

He laughed, nodding, “Of course. Can I still kiss you?”

You chuckled, “Of course.”

Sunday night rolled around and you all but kicked the doors in to the clubhouse. The MC was already there—Bishop had left the house a few hours earlier for Templo. The meeting had since adjourned because all of the guys were milling about the expanse of the clubhouse with the usual hang-arounds.

You went up to Angel, who was sitting with his brother at the bar. You held out your hand, “Pay up, Reyes.”

EZ looked back and forth between the two of you with confusion all over his face. Angel chuckled, “Damn, you really did it, didn’t you? No wonder Bish was so uptight in Templo tonight,” he laughed as he dug his wallet out and slapped the money into your hand.

Before you could come up with a smart remark, Bishop materialized next to you, wondering why you hadn’t come over to say hello but instead came over to Angel. Bishop was always your first stop when you arrived at the clubhouse.

“What’s going on over here?” he asked with a curious smile.

You wrapped your arm around Bishop’s waist, “Your secretario just made me fifty bucks richer. That’s what’s going on.”

“Oh? How’d that happen?”

You looked at Angel, “Go on. Tell him. I’m getting a fucking drink,” you laughed as you walked over to the bartender.

“So?” Bishop looked at Angel.

It was written all over his face that he didn’t want to tell the MC president that he had made a bet about the man’s sex life. But you hadn’t left him with much of a choice. Angel chuckled nervously and shrugged his shoulders, “I made a bet with Y/N that she couldn’t, y’know, that she couldn’t go a week without—”

“A week without fucking you,” you interrupted your way back into the conversation when you saw that the discomfort was about to kill Angel on the spot. The look on his face was almost worth more than the fifty dollars.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Bishop was looking at Angel when he asked. When he saw that Angel wasn’t going to be able to come up with an answer, he turned to you, “Why did you agree?”

You held up the fifty-dollar bill that was in your hand, “Fifty bucks is fifty bucks, baby.”

He shook his head and without another word he crouched down, wrapped his arms around your thighs, and threw you over his shoulder. You let you a scream that turned into a laugh as he carried you across the expanse of the clubhouse. You awkwardly tried to tuck the money back into your back pocket as he carried you. The most impressive part of the whole thing was that he hefted you off the ground like he had done it a million times before, and you were content to just let him.

He walked into Templo and slid the door shut hard behind him. You giggled to yourself as he set you on the end of the table. He spread your legs and stood between them, looking down into your eyes.

“You think this is funny?” his tone was serious.

“A little,” you couldn’t stop yourself from giggling at the absurdity of the entire situation. How you had successfully dodged every sexual situation with him that week was beyond you.

He gripped your hips, “It’s been a long fuckin’ week, sweetheart.”

The playful smile disappeared from your face as a shiver went through your whole body. He grabbed the bottom hem of your shirt and pulled it off over your head, tossing it to the side. You pulled him in close to you and kissed him hard on the lips, melting into him as his hands roamed all over your body. He bit down on your bottom lip and you moaned, pressing your fingertips harder into his shoulder blades.

His hands wandered down to the button on your jeans and you smiled into your kiss as he deftly undid both the button and the zipper without missing a beat. You braced yourself against him and lifted your hips up slightly, allowing him to pull down your jeans and underwear in one smooth motion. You gasped as you sat back down on the table, the cold sensation against your freshly-exposed skin shocking you for a moment.

Bishop attached his lips to your neck and you moaned as you blindly reached for his belt. You tried to stay focused enough to undo it, which was proving difficult as you felt him sucking a dark mark into the side of your neck. A wave of heat washed over your entire body, reveling in the fact that he was touching you and you didn’t have to come up with a reason to make him stop. You finally yanked down on his jeans and you felt him chuckle against your neck.

He pulled you closer to the edge of the table and you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him as close to you as you could. Seven days felt like an eternity, and as you felt him pressing against your entrance, you wondered how the hell you managed it.

“You been this wet waiting for me all week, querida?” his nipped at your bottom lip.

You nodded, letting out an unsteady breath, “Yes.”

There was a smug grin on his face as he slowly pushed into you. He let out a low groan as he did and you dropped your head back, a loud moan escaping you before you could try to censor yourself.

“Fuck, Obispo,” you dug your nails into his shoulders as you pressed yourself tight to him, “You feel so good.”

He pressed kisses all over your neck and jawline as he started to slowly thrust into you, “You miss this?”

You nodded, hardly able to form a coherent thought, “Fuck, yes.”

He quickly pulled out of you, peeling your body off of his. You whimpered at the loss of contact. Before you could say anything, he pulled you completely off the table and bent you over it, causing you to gasp. He spread your legs and slid back inside you. You gripped the edges of the table to try and steady yourself.

He wrapped one hand around your throat and gripped slightly, pulling you upwards just a bit as he thrust into you. “Was it worth it?” he grunted, “Going all week without this, without me?” his applied more pressure to your throat, letting you know that it was not a question he wanted you to actually respond to.

He let go of you and you sucked in a breath, bracing yourself against the tabletop. His hands dropped down to your hips and pulled you back hard against him. You moaned as his hand came down hard against your ass. You bit down on your lip to try and quiet yourself but Bishop wasn’t having it.

“Moan louder for me, sweetheart,” one hand slid up your back and gripped the back of your neck.

“Obispo,” you panted, “they’ll hear—”

“You made it their fuckin’ business already, Y/N, don’t get shy now.”

The statement made your whole face get hot, but you didn’t have much time to think about being embarrassed. His fingertips dug back in to your hips as he slammed into you, making you let out a yelp. He reached one hand around and started rubbing circles onto your clit and you couldn’t fight back the moans that escaped you. Your entire body started to shake and you knew that you weren’t going to be able to hold out any longer, not after a week of no real contact with him.

“Fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum,” you gripped the table.

He pushed farther into you, “Cum for me.”

That was all you needed to hear. You were completely depending on him and the table to keep you somewhat upright as your orgasm rolled through you. You felt his pace speed up as he started to get close as well. He gripped one of your shoulders hard as he came inside you, moaning as he pressed his face into your back. You let out a shaky breath, soaking up the feeling of him leaning into you, keeping you held tight to him.

Once he caught his breath, he slowly pulled out of you. He gently lifted you and set you back on the table, knowing it was going to be difficult for you to stand. There was a small smile on his face as he pulled up his jeans and redid his belt. He stepped in close to you again, leaving a trail of soft kisses from your chest up your neck and to your lips. You laughed lightly, your hands reaching out to gently cup his face.

You rested your forehead against his, “I wanna go home, Obispo.”

He chuckled, “There gonna be enough hot water for both of us to shower this time?”

You laughed, your face getting hot, “Yea, I think so.”

You got dressed, instantly ready to get your clothes off and get clean the second you got home. You wished that you didn’t need to drive back. You tried to fix and adjust your clothing, not that it would really matter—the guys knew what the two of you had been doing.

Bishop slid the door open and let you walk out first. Everyone was making an effort to look anywhere but at the two of you. You placed a light kiss on Bishop’s lips and headed right out to your car, not bothering to say goodbye to anyone. They were all expected Bishop to follow right after you but instead he walked up to Angel, who was staring very intently at his beer bottle.

“Get all that sorted out, Pres?” Angel chuckled, trying to pretend that there wasn’t fear shooting up and down his spine.

“I find out you’re making any other stupid fucking bets like that again I’ll take your flash,” his face was serious for a moment before he allowed himself to smile. He clapped Angel on the back and walked away, leaving the man sitting there wondering just how serious that threat was.

[justthehiddleswrites]

Accidently Married | Tom Hiddleston x OFC | Chapter 4 | You should worry about the people you care about. I mean, I worry about you all the time.

A/N:  Tom makes certain comments about an ex (who is unnamed).  It is a fictional girlfriend, take from it what you will.  Keep your hate to yourself.  

SERIES MASTERLIST HERE

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x OFC (Molly Bishop)

Summary: Tom is stuck in a news cycle from hell; Molly is stuck in the dead end job of bartending with a pile of student and credit debt.  Tom has an idea to solve all their problems.  Get married, get the paparazzi off his back, divorce after a year and Tom pays off Molly’s debts.  Tom has everything figured out, that is until he sees Molly as more than a just a friend and so does someone else.  In this vying for affections who will win, the handsome Brit or the boy from Boston?

This Chapter: Molly is making friends and life is settling into a routine until Molly gets sick and Tom takes care of her.  

Warnings: fake marriage, smut (vaginal sex), mentions of:  child abuse/neglect, foster care, substance abuse, cheating.

TAGLIST IS OPEN! PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED!  THANK YOU FOR READING!

–

Molly left that afternoon with two new numbers in her phone and a lunch date for next week.

“Can’t believe you are having lunch with my mother and sister without me.” Tom pouted on the way back.

“Once they heard I wasn’t working and didn’t know anyone, they insisted. Was I supposed to say no?” 

“You could have scheduled it when I could come.” 

“But you are so busy. And talented.” She poked his side. 

“I’m driving here, darling.”

“Sorry, but just one question…” They pulled up to a red light.”

“What?”

“Are you ticklish?” she attacked his side and Tom squirmed and giggled.

“You will be the death of me.” He panted as Molly stopped when the light was green.

“Note to self. Tom is very ticklish.” 

“No, no notes to self. That is something you can promptly forget.”

Molly batted her eyelashes. “But real husbands and wives would know these things about each other. We have to pull this off for an entire year, right?”

“Fine, but expect revenge.” Tom wagged a finger at Molly. 

“I’ll sleep with one eye open.” 

-

Over the next several weeks, Tom and Molly fell in a routine. The marriage certificate came in the mail and they applied for a family visa for Molly to stay there.

“I didn’t think you would want to become a citizen.”

Molly smirked. “No, not right now.”

A new debit card came in for Molly. 

“With great power…” Tom handed it over.

“Yeah, yeah, Loki.” she tucked into her wallet. “I am burdened with glorious purpose. To keep you well fed.” 

Molly had a standing date with Emma every two weeks, much to Tom’s consternation. They continued running together in the mornings. Tom, more often than not, ended it with a kiss. 

“This is becoming quite the nasty habit, Mr. Hiddleston.” she commented one morning.

“Then stop me, Mrs. Hiddleston.” He pecked her lips again. 

Molly blushed. “You just love what they are saying about us in the papers.” She pushed Tom away and towards the door. 

“I will admit the good news is definitely a perk. Plus, you are such lovely company.” He went to hug her, but she pushed him away.

“You are all sweaty, Tom. Take a shower and I will make breakfast.”

“French toast?” he asked hopefully.

“You ate the last of the bread yesterday.” 

“Pancakes?”

“I think I can swing pancakes, if…” She held up a finger. “You also eat a side of fruit.”

“Deal.” Tom headed towards his room wearing a huge grin. 

Molly shook her head as she grabbed a mixing bowl out. “Lunatic.”

-

One morning, Molly wasn’t awake when Tom got up to run. She almost always beat Tom up, sipping a cup of tea in the living room, reading a magazine or one of the books from his shelf. There was a small stack building on a side table of the ones she finished reading. But that morning, no half-drunk cup of tea perched precariously on the coffee table. No crossword puzzle half done in pen. 

Tom peaked into Molly’s bedroom. The covers, in colors of navy and grey, just like his, pulled up tight around her. There were a few prints of classic travel posters on the wall. 

“Molly, darling.” He called out. Usually that was all it took to roust Molly from her sleep and get her going for the day. Today, nothing. Tom stepped into the room. He felt like an intruder in his own home. 

“It’s time for our run, love.” He said a bit louder this time. 

Molly rolled over, groaning and coughing. Tom’s brow furrowed. He didn’t like the sound of that cough. Tom sat down on the edge of the bed and rocked Molly gently by the shoulder.

“Are you feeling okay, darling?” He hoped it was just allergies or waking up in the morning. But then she woke up.

“Uggh, Tom?” Molly croaked out before rolling onto her back. She was pale. So much more pale than usual. She coughed again, covering her mouth. 

“It’s me, Molly. Are you feeling alright?” He repeated. “That’s some cough.”

“I’m fine, fine. It’s just,” She waved him off and pushed up to sitting, only to fall back onto the pillows. “oh, that’s not good.” 

Tom placed the back of his hand to her forehead and replaced it with his lips, checking her temperature. She was running hot. 

“You have a fever. I’m making you an appointment to see the doctor.” He stood, but Molly caught his wrist. Her palm clammy against Tom’s skin.

“No! It’s just a cold. Go on your run. I’ll be fine. I just need some sleep.” She insisted.

“Are you sure? It’s no trouble.” 

“Go. I’ll be fine.”

Tom leaned down and kissed her very warm forehead. “I’ll keep it short. Go back to sleep.”

Molly nodded and rolled over. Tom tucked the covers around her and headed out. He barely made it to the end of the street before he returned home. It confirmed his fears when he stepped back inside and heard Molly coughing. Tom grabbed the phone and searched for a number and called it.

“Yes, Urgent Care? Do you have any appointments today? Name? Molly Hiddleston. Thank you.”

-

Tom helped Molly get dressed, averting his eyes when appropriate. Her entire body burned under his fingertips, but Tom noticed her shivering. She stumbled to the car where she slept the entire ride over to urgent care. Tom did his best to fill out the paperwork.

“What do you put for family history?”

“Nothing. Unless there is a place for mental illness, then check that. That’s all I know about. Mom didn’t chat much.” Molly muttered, leaning heavily against Tom. “Meth does that…” Her brow furrowed and she coughed again. 

“Shh, darling.” Tom soothed her. “Only happy thoughts.”

Molly hummed and smiled. “Happy thoughts.” More coughing. 

It took twenty minutes before they called Molly back. They didn’t let Tom back with her. He alternated between sitting with a bouncing knee, pretending to read on his phone and pacing the waiting room, making the other people nervous. After forty-five minutes, before Molly returned with several papers in her hand. She coughed again.

“Upper respiratory infection,” cough. “Along with a sinus infection and a viral infection.”

Tom smiled. “Triple threat. Let’s get you home.”

Molly’s hand, holding the papers, flopped up. “I have prescriptions and they want to see me again in two weeks. To make sure I don’t get pneumonia.”

Tom’s eyes widened. “That’s a possibility?”

Molly nodded. “It’s all in here.”

Tom took all the papers, skimming them, including a script for antibiotics as well as a cough suppressant. It all sounded grim. “Let’s get you to bed and I will take care of getting these filled.”

Molly coughed and nodded. “Thank you.” 

She fell back asleep in the car. Tom carried into the house, not having the heart to wake her up again, and settled her into his bed, which was bigger, more comfortable and the bathroom was right there. Once she was settled and asleep, he headed off to the pharmacy. While waiting in line, Tom dialed Luke. 

“Luke, is there anything absolutely pressing in the schedule for the next three days?” he asked after Luke picked up. 

“Nothing I can’t reschedule, why?”

“Molly’s ill.” He bit his lips and sighed. “The doctors are afraid it might turn into pneumonia. And I…”

“Consider your schedule cleared until Monday. And tell her I hope she feels better soon.”

“Thanks, Luke. I’m worried about her.”

“That’s because you love her, Tom. You should worry about the people you care about. I mean, I worry about you all the time.” Luke chuckled.

Tom paused at Luke’s words but pushed it away. Of course he cared for Molly. That has the tendency to happen when you live with a person for nearly three months. Especially someone as congenial as Molly. Congenial wasn’t the word. Lovely. Molly was lovely. He laughed it off. “I worry about you too, Luke. I got to go.”

“Take care of her. Bye, Tom.” 

After picking you the medicine, Tom popped into the grocery store and picked up some soup, drinks, and Molly’s favorite cookies. When he got back, she was still asleep. And still coughing. He put away the groceries and then checked on her.

“Darling, I’m back with the medicine. Time to take it.” He helped her sit up, Molly groaning the entire time. She swallowed the pill with a sip of water, gagging.

“That’s awful!” she coughed. 

“Now the cough medicine.” Tom poured out the cough syrup and handed it over to Molly. She hesitated, sniffing it first. “Take the medicine and get a biscuit.” He held up a package of cookies.

“They’re cookies. I thought I ate the last of them.” she moaned, downing the cough syrup. Her face contorted. Tom smiled and handed her two cookies. “Good girl. Now rest. I’ll check on you in a few hours.”

“Don’t you have work?” Molly muttered as she laid back down. Tom pulled the covers over her, putting the cookies on the nightstand. “You had… interviews… or something…”

“My schedule is clear through the weekend. I am at your disposal.” Tom rubbed Molly’s back, and she purred. 

“You don’t need to do that.” She half-heartedly complained, dozing off.

“And leave you to fend for yourself? What kind of husband would I be? It was no trouble. Now sleep, darling.”

“Mmm… kay.” 

-

Tom busied himself with absolutely nothing. He flitted from reading a book to watching a TV show to peeking into the bedroom. At one point, when Molly was particularly quiet, he seriously contemplated putting a mirror under her nose to just make sure he was still breathing. He managed to get her to eat half a bowl of soup. 

“You need to eat, love.” he scolded.

Molly coughed and croaked. “Says the man who considers chocolate a food group.” 

“Look at that, some humour.” Tom smiled. “Eat please.”

“Yes, sir.” She slurped the soup off the spoon before falling back asleep. 

Tom, worried, did the unthinkable. He called his mum for advice.

“She’s coughing. A lot. And all she does is sleep.” Tom ran his hands through his hair. 

“Is she eating, love?” Diana asked. Tom could feel the smile across the phone.

“A bit, but not as much as usual. I brought her soup.”

“Soup is good. And she is taking her medicine?”

Tom nodded. “I set a timer.”

“Of course you did. And the fever?”

Tom blinked. “What about her fever?”

“Has it broken?”

“I don’t—”

“Tom!” Molly’s bedraggled voice called out.

“I gotta go. She needs me.” Tom hung up the phone and sprinted to the room. 

“Molly! What is it?” He noted she was shivering.

“I’m cold.” she chattered. Tom grabbed the blanket at the foot of his bed. 

“Is that better?” He tucked it under Molly’s chin. Tom touched her forehead. Hot.

“Much.” 

“I’ll let you rest.” He patted her shoulder and stood. Molly reached out for him.

“Stay.” She coughed. “At least until I fall asleep. Please lie down. Just five minutes.”

Tom’s heart broke in that moment for Molly. That confident woman he grew so fond of seemed so small in that moment.

“Of course, I’ll stay. Anything for you.” Tom crawled on top of the covers next to Molly. He laced his fingers in hers. He heard her exhaled, and he exhaled too. 

“Sleep well, darling.” But Molly had already fallen asleep. Tom soon followed.

-

Molly woke the next morning in sweat soaked pajamas and on top of drenched sheets. She still coughed, but her fever was gone. As she blinked her eyes open, Molly realized she wasn’t in her bed, but Tom’s. And Tom was there too. Asleep next to her, fully dressed, holding her hand. She had vague memories of Tom bringing her soup and her asking him to stay. And some very not safe for work dreams. 

“Fever dreams.” she muttered. “Tom…” Molly rocked his shoulder.

“Huh?” Tom sat up. “I guess I was more tired than I thought.”

“It’s hard to be a nurse. I think your sheets may need washing.” she smiled.

Tom pressed his lips to her forehead. “No fever.” His spirits lifted. 

“It must have broken last night.”

“Feeling better?” he asked.

“Yes.” 

Tom noticed their hands still laced together. He let go and stood up. He made a poor attempt at smoothing out his sleep wrinkled clothes. “Up to move to the couch? And maybe some movies?”

“I would like that.” She slowly sat up and got out of bed. “But first a shower.”

Tom frowned. “First medicine, then shower.”

“Nurse Ratched.” Tom didn’t smile or budge. Molly sighed. “Fine, medicine, the shower.”

Tom grabbed the bottles and dispensed the medicine, which she took still gagging. “And a biscuit.” He handed her a cookie. 

“Cookie.” She popped it into her mouth and headed off to her room and Tom went to his own bathroom. 

-

Once they were both showered and dressed, Tom popped his sheets into the laundry and made a makeshift bed on the couch for Molly.

“You pick the movie.” she offered. “That way if I fall asleep, you won’t be bored.” 

Tom picked The Jungle Book. “One of my favorites as a child. I still watch it when I feel under the weather.”

“I don’t think I have seen it.”

Tom’s mouth fell open. “That is a travesty.”

Molly shrugged her shoulders. “You know, group homes, foster care…”

Tom stopped. “Well, we are going to watch this right now and you can listen to the vocal genius that is George Sanders as Shere Khan.”

“More of a vocal genius than you?” Molly raised an eyebrow while she settled onto the couch. 

Tom blushed. “A man-cub, how delightful.” He purred deep in his chest, sending shivers through Molly.

By the end of the movie, Molly’s head was in Tom’s lap and his hand in hers. They watched Disney movies for the rest of day, alternating picking the title. Tom made sure she took her meds on time and ate more than just cookies.

“I will eat a meal if you do.” Molly chided.

They both ate soup and Tom also ate a sandwich. It was late when they finished up Robin Hood. Molly stretched and sat up.

“I should go to bed.”

“I can put the sheets back on the bed.” Tom moved, but she stopped him, squeezing his hand.

“My bed. But I will keep the door open so you can spy on me.” She smirked. “I can’t take your bed again.”

“It’s fine if you did. I don’t mind sharing.”

“I know but…” She glanced away. “We should keep our own space. To keep things from getting complicated.”

Tom nodded. “Right. No complications here.” he lied to her and to himself.

Molly hugged Tom tight. “Thank you for everything, Tom.”

“My pleasure.”

She coughed a bit as she headed off to her room. Tom turned off the TV and cleaned the dishes before going to bed himself. He spent most of the night tossing and turning.

[englishstrawbie]

Serendipity (20/?)

Fandom: Station 19, Grey’s Anatomy

Characters: Maya Bishop & Carina DeLuca

Summary: A chance meeting at a bar leads to these two idiots falling in love. Follows canon and fills in the gaps of their relationship that we didn’t get to see on screen.

Also @ AO3.

* * * * * * * * * * 

Acceptance

The past cannot be changed, forgotten, edited or erased; it can only be accepted. - Anon

Maya is wide awake when her alarm starts to ring at six a.m. She must have barely had two hours sleep, her body too wired and her head too full of thoughts to relax enough to let exhaustion win. She rolls over and grabs her phone, hitting the red button and letting it drop onto the blankets without bothering to check for messages. She doesn’t jump out of bed like she normally does, but lies there staring at the ceiling – as if she hasn’t been doing that all night, replaying yesterday’s events over and over again in her head.

Her fight with Carina.

Her fight with Andy.

Her fight with Jack.

The sex with Jack. The betrayal. The look on Carina’s face when she told her.

She wishes she had stayed at the apartment instead of going for a run, but Carina kept pushing and Maya couldn’t listen to it any more. She wishes she had never stepped foot inside the station. She wishes Jack had left her office when she asked him to get out. She wishes… there is so much that Maya wishes but she knows it is a pointless feat.

She didn’t mean for it to happen. She didn’t go looking for it, she didn’t want it. She had felt herself unravelling and Jack just wouldn’t shut up and she had to make him stop, she had to take back control of the situation that was spiraling away from her. It is the most stupid and selfish thing Maya has ever done and she wishes she could take it back, but she can’t.

She feels raw, like everyone has peeled back her layers and exposed her for who she really is. The High School track star who used to run for fun until her father took over coaching and it became about keeping him happy. The Olympian chasing her father’s dreams instead of her own. The girl whose worth was measured by the number of gold medals hanging in her bedroom.

She has lived her life by the mantras that her father instilled in her during her teenage years. Always be the best; first place is the only prize worth winning. Don’t let anyone distract you from the goal.

Embrace the pain. Eyes forward at all times.

They are the building blocks of her life and she feels like someone has come along with a hammer and knocked those blocks down. She is falling and there is no-one there to catch her. Not Carina; not even the clouds to keep her safe.

Blinking back tears, Maya grabs the spare pillow on her bed and smothers her face, screaming into it, desperate to let out every ounce of frustration in her body. The release she gets from it is quickly replaced with memories of her ex-girlfriend as she takes a deep breath and inhales the scent of Carina’s shampoo that still lingers on the pillowcase. Her senses are flooded with memories that she can’t bear and she flings the pillow to one side, not caring when it falls to the floor.

With a heavy sigh, Maya rolls onto her side and swings her legs off the bed, pushing herself upright. She reaches her hands above her chest and stretches, the cotton fabric of her t-shirt lifting up and exposing her abs. The cold morning air causes her muscles to ripple, small goosebumps forming. She rolls her neck before standing up and wandering to the bathroom.

She takes a long, hot shower. She had scrubbed every inch of her body last night, washing off every memory of her tryst with Jack until she felt clean – on the outside, at least. She takes her time this morning, letting the water relax her tense muscles.

She dresses and makes her usual protein shake for breakfast, then jumps in her car, skipping her run to work. She doesn’t have the energy after yesterday’s run and workout, and she knows she can always make use of the station gym again if her body craves more exercise.  

When eight o’clock rolls around, Maya sets the team to work on their chores, before hiding away in her office to catch up on B shift’s call out reports. It is a slow morning and no-one bothers her, and she wonders if they can tell that she isn’t in the mood for chatter today.

She tries to concentrate but it is hard, her mind wanders to Carina constantly. She wonders what Carina is thinking, how she is feeling, if there is any part of her that might forgive Maya’s betrayal. Except now Carina has seen her most broken parts and Maya knows she will never be able to earn her forgiveness, so what is the point of even trying?

Just after eleven o’clock, her cellphone rings. Maya’s first thought is whether it is Carina calling her, even it is just to yell at her, and her heart sinks when she sees the home screen light up with ‘Dad’. She lets it ring out and waits to see if he leaves a voicemail. She knows why he is calling and she can’t handle him today.

As much as she didn’t want to hear her mom’s accusations of abuse, she really doesn’t want to hear her dad’s excuses. Because he always has an excuse, he always has a reason for why he treats her the way he does and she is tired of it. She grew up wanting nothing more than his approval, because his approval meant love. This morning she had woken up, her relationship in tatters, and had realised that she didn’t need approval to be loved. She had Carina’s love without condition and she had ruined it by cheating and then throwing it in Carina’s face.

Her dad doesn’t leave a message and she is grateful for that, at least. She turns attention back to work and tries to get through the pile of reports that need to be signed off. The aid car gets called out a couple of times, but there are no fires and the morning passes slowly. She can hear the jokes and laughter of her team floating through the door from the barn and into the reception area outside her office, and she is envious of how lighthearted they are when her heart is so heavy.

Jack knocks on her door at lunch time.

“Are you joining us for lunch?” he asks tentatively, clearly not sure of what kind of welcome he’s going to get.

“No thanks,” Maya says curtly, keeping her eyes down. She is no mood to get into a conversation with him.

He is ignorant to her mood – again – and steps inside, keeping close to the door.

“Look, about yesterday…” he starts, but Maya cuts him off quickly.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she says. “It shouldn’t have happened.” She lifts her head and looks him square in the eyes. “It won’t happen again.”

“No, no, I know,” Jack says. “And I won’t say anything. To anyone. Especially not Carina.”

If only she had shown the same sensitivity last night, Maya thinks to herself.

“Carina knows.”

Jack’s thick eyebrows shoot upwards in surprise. “She does?”

Maya nods shortly.

“And you two are…?”

“Over,” Maya says, looking away so that he can’t see the pain in her eyes. “We’re over.”

She says it with an accusatory tone which she knows is unjustified because the only person she has to blame for getting into this mess is herself, but she doesn’t care because she just wants him gone. It works, too, and he backs off, disappearing up to the beanery and leaving her alone.

She skips lunch, in no mood to make conversation. Just saying the words out loud that her relationship with Carina is over leaves her feeling despondent and she so desperately wants to shake it off. Maybe this is what heartbreak feels like, she realises. It is unfamiliar to her and it knocks her off balance.

A call to a factory fire mid-afternoon distracts her from her thoughts. Her team make quick work of evacuating all of the employees, but the fire ravages the building and it takes all of her focus and attention to stop it from collapsing. It is hours before they arrive back at the station, tired and hungry. Maya’s stomach growls and she steels herself to join the team for dinner, glad that everyone is too exhausted to engage in much conversation. They all crash out afterwards, except for Maya whose body fights sleep. She has been better lately at sleeping at work, letting herself relax even though her head tells her to stay awake and alert and focused at all times. There were some nights when Carina would sneak through the front door when no-one was looking and curl up in the captain’s bunk with her, and Maya would find peace in the other woman’s arms. She craves that feeling again.

The engine is called out to a house fire at three a.m. and Maya jumps on the call, even though she doesn’t need to, just to do something other than be kept awake by her guilt.

She crashes out when she gets home. She knows it is going to screw up her body clock but she doesn’t care. It’s not like she has anything to do today anyway. Time that would usually be spent with Carina is now free time again. Maya used to love that, but now she hates the silence. She misses Carina’s laugh and her insane stories about work and the smell of her rich Italian food filling her kitchen.

Maya’s fingers graze over her cellphone every now and again, and she thinks about calling Carina, but each time she convinces herself that she is only setting herself up for more heartbreak. Instead, she wastes the day sleeping and cleaning and running errands, doing everything she can to quell the loneliness that starts to build up inside of her.

Her next shift is busier and Maya misses another call from her dad. She sends him a quick message to placate him but she knows she is going to have to talk to him eventually. Except she doesn’t know what to say to him. All the energy she used to have in defending him and his ways has been drained from her and she feels empty. She has always been her father’s daughter, that’s what everyone used to say, and she doesn’t know who she will be without his guiding presence in her life. All that is left is a person who hurts the only woman she has every truly loved, and she knows she doesn’t want to be that person.

It is a thought that plagues her mind over and over as she evades sleep once more. By the time the morning rolls around, she is exhausted again. Just after seven a.m. she goes in search for coffee and stumbles on the team helping themselves to the breakfast that the B shift have cooked, despite the objections from Finch and his pals. It doesn’t go unnoticed that they fall quiet when she walks into the beanery and Maya sees Ben looking shifty. She figures that word of her break up has got back to him via Bailey and she avoids eye contact, silently hoping that no-one will ask her about it. The smell of crispy bacon makes her stomach rumble and she tucks in herself, knowing that Finch won’t utter a word to her.

Travis is the first one to say something. “Hey Captain?”

Maya looks at him, wary of what he is going to say. “Yeah?”

“Party at Dean’s houseboat tonight,” he announces, looking at her expectantly.

Maya hesitates. She can’t deny that the thought of leaving all of her problems at the bottom of a liquor bottle is appealing.

“Come on, we’re all gonna let off some steam,” Dean says, refusing to take no for an answer.

Maya relents. “I’ll bring the tequila,” she says with a small smile.

Dean grins at her. “Alright!”

Maya spends the day alone again. She heads to bed as soon as she walks through the front door and sleeps until lunch time. When she wakes, she fuels herself with a protein smoothie before going for a five mile run to burn off some of her pent up energy. She wastes away the afternoon in front of the television until evening rolls around. After a quick trip to the liquor store, she arrives at Dean’s house just after eight o’clock.

“Nice of you to join us, Captain,” Dean says with a twinkle in his eye, shuffling back and welcoming Maya inside the houseboat.

Someone immediately shoves a bottle of beer into her hand and she takes a swig. It’s earthy and sharp, and maybe she is used to the delicate bouquet of wine since spending so much time with Carina, but it leaves a bitter taste in her mouth that she isn’t used to these days. She takes another mouthful, figuring she might as well get to used to something different, as she shrugs off her jacket and throws it onto the back of a chair.

Within minutes, Travis grabs her hand.

“Come and dance!” he cajoles her.

He is already a few drinks ahead of her, his body relaxed and his eyes shining. She feels envious of the happiness that exudes from him and lets him drag her to the middle of the room, where Vic and Emmett are dancing.

“Maya! About damn time!” Vic says, holding up her glass and grinning widely as Maya clinks her bottle against it.

They dance and Maya lets the stress in her body flow out of her. She closes her eyes as she moves, getting lost in the beat of the music, trying to clear her head of everything that has been haunting her.

Her dad. Carina.

She drinks a second beer and a third and a fourth, each drink burying her feelings further down. She ignores the way her heart hurts and allows herself to enjoy the company of her friends. They get silly, jumping and spinning around, and Maya’s cheeks ache from smiling and laughing more than she has in days, ignoring the guilt that weighs down on her.

“I heard you broke up with your hot doctor lover,” Vic says as they dance.

Maya feels a jolt in her chest at the mention of her ex-girlfriend and she remembers just how much she misses her, but she pushes it down again and pretends to shrug it off instead.

“I heard you broke up with yours,” she says in return. At least she’s not alone in nursing a broken heart.

“Yeah,” Vic says. “Yeah, we’re dumb.”

Maya doesn’t need anyone to tell her how stupid she is for destroying her relationship with Carina.

They party until the early hours of the morning until, one by one, they start to pass out. Maya waits until they’re squabbling about bedrooms and space on the couch before she orders an Uber and slips out unnoticed. She’s glad to curl up in her own bed except she is growing tired of sleeping in it by herself. She misses Carina’s body curled up against her, the warmth of her breath on her neck, and the softness of her hand slipping underneath her tank top.

Despite the amount she had to drink, Maya wakes just before nine o’clock the next morning. Her throat is dry and scratchy, her head hurts, and she regrets the tequila. She practically crawls out of bed and gets straight into the shower, letting the hot water wash away the night before.

She makes eggs for breakfast and wolfs them down, her hangover demanding food, quickly followed by a green smoothie because she knows she ought to get something nutritious inside of her. It is her day off and she regrets not making any plans, because she doesn’t know what to do with herself. She settles on the couch and flicks through her phone, smiling at the idiotic photos they took last night, until she scrolls back far enough to the last photo she has of Carina. It was taken a few days before their fight, they had gone out to dinner in downtown Seattle. It was a candid photo, Carina had been leaning against the railing overlooking the water as they had waited for their table to be ready. Maya had volunteered to fetch them drinks from the bar and, on her way back, she had been blown away with how beautiful Carina looked in that moment. She didn’t tell Carina she was taking the photo, she never even showed it to her. It was a secret that Maya carried on her cell phone.

It has been five days since she made the worst mistake of her life and she still doesn’t have the courage to reach out to Carina. She doesn’t know where to begin when it comes to saying sorry for what she had done, doesn’t know how to explain why she did it. So instead tries to convince herself that their relationship was another fling which just happened to last longer than the ones before it. She tries to forget just how much she loves Carina and how hard her heart aches every minute of every damn day.

She is exhausted and she drops her head on the back of the couch, closing her eyes and willing sleep to take her away from real life for a while. It is not long before her phone pings, jerking her awake and alerting her to a five alarm call. Within seconds the Battalion Chief is calling her, telling her there has been an explosion at a nearby hospital. Maya’s mind goes straight to Carina.

“Which hospital?” is her first question. “Sir? Which hospital?”

“Pac North,” Chief Sato answers. “Get your team here as soon as you can, it’s all hands on deck.”

“Yes Sir,” Maya says.

She rushes to the bedroom and pulls on the first pair of shoes she can find, then jumps into her car. It is only a five minute car ride and she pulls in behind Dean’s SUV just as the group from the night before, minus Andy, fall out of it looking worse for wear and just as regretful about how much alcohol they consumed last night.

“Explosion at Pac North,” she says as she gets out of her car. “Get into your gear and let’s go!”

They all jump into action, running to the locker room and pulling on her turnout gear in record time.

“Montgomery, take the aid car with Warren. Gibson, Hughes, Miller, take the ladder truck. I’ll meet you there in the engine.”

They nod at her and rush to the barn, while Maya takes a detour to the front desk to pick up the floor plans of the hospital that the Chief has asked her to bring to the scene. As she rushes through the station, she is surprised by the sight of her dad leaning against the front desk. Her stomach flips at seeing him. He looks solemn as he looks down at his hands, twisting his wedding band around his finger. He hears her coming and looks up, his frown turning into a smile when he sees her.

“Hey,” he says.

Maya slows her pace. “Dad… what are you doing here?”

“Well, I figured I’d stop by and see my daughter the captain in action,” Lane says, watching as Maya collects her papers from the printer. “I’ve been calling you for days.”

Maya knows that tone – he’s mad, he’s just not showing it.

“I’m sorry,” she says on autopilot. “There’s been a lot going on and I have to go.” She backs away and into the barn. “But just hang here until l get back.”

“Sure kiddo,” Lane says, as Maya climbs into the fire engine.

She hates it when he calls her ‘kiddo’. Most people think of it as a term of endearment, but Maya knows it is his way of reminding him of who has the power in their relationship. Father/daughter. Master/servant.

“Hey?” Lane calls out after her. “Go Captain!”

He pumps his fist in the air at her and Maya shoots him a half smile as she closes the door, offering him a small wave as the engine pulls out of the barn and hurtles down the road towards Pac North.

They are greeted by Chief Sato on their arrival.

“I thought the hospital was closed?” Maya questions.

“Mostly,” Sato says. “ER is open, it’s transferring admits. Radiology on the first floor, research wing in the basement.”

“Gas leak?”

“That’s our guess,” Sato says. “Utilities are off…”

He doesn’t get to say any more before another explosion blasts out of the third floor. So much for a gas leak, Maya thinks. Her team don’t hesitate as they rush into the hospital, while Maya stays outside, pouring over the plans with the Chief and his team as they try to work out a pattern to the explosions. There is no way of knowing if and when another explosion might happen, so her team’s orders are simple: get everyone and themselves out of the building as soon as possible.

They are taking their time and Maya becomes impatient. “Gibson, I need all of my team out of that building now,” she demands through the radio.

“Copy Captain,” comes Jack’s reply.

Her momentary relief at hearing from him quickly dissipates when another explosion blasts out the first floor windows.

“What the hell,” Maya mutters, immediately spotting Cutler coming out of the building carrying a firefighter from Station 23 on his shoulders. He is followed by two more carrying an injured firefighter between them. There is no sign of anyone else from 19. “We have two firefighters from 23 with blast injuries,” she says down her radio. “19? 19 do you copy?”

There is an urgency to her voice that she can’t hide. The last few months have been full of so much loss and she can’t lose anyone else.

“Copy,” Jack says. “Explosion above us caused collapse of the hallway outside. Gibson here with Hughes, Miller, Warren, Montgomery and one patient.”

Maya breathes a sigh of relief at hearing from him. “Gibson, do you have egress?”

“Negative,” Jack replies.

“Dammit,” Maya curses. Before she gets chance to liaise with Chief Sato, Dixon turns up.

“Bishop, Sato, report,” he barks.

Maya takes the lead. “Third explosion and fire on the third floor. Weakened structural integrity causing partial collapse. We have two from 23 injured and five currently trapped in the basement research wing. Requesting USAR company to come in…”

“Chief! Chief Dixon! Over here, Sir!” come calls from the crowd.

Chief Dixon is immediately distracted by the attention of the press and saunters away as Maya is mid-sentence.

“Afternoon all, happy to answer any questions you may have,” she hears him address them.

She shakes her head in disbelief and has to bite her tongue in front of Chief Sato to stop herself from saying something she shouldn’t. “What’s USAR’s ETA?” she asks instead.

“He said five minutes out,” Sato answers.

Maya turns her focus back to the task in hand, desperate to get her team to safety.

Within minutes, Gibson is back on the radio. “Bishop, we have a suspicious device...”

He is cut short and silence falls. Maya waits for more but nothing else comes. “Gibson? Gibson?!” she calls for him, but he doesn’t answer.

“This is Pac North IC requesting SPD bomb squad code red response,” Sato demands through his radio.

“And we still have a news chopper and a drone,” Maya says, looking upwards into the sky. “Medivac’s still not cleared to land.”

Out of nowhere, a familiar voice grabs Maya’s attention from behind her.

“There’s my girl…”

Maya turns, immediately on edge when she sees her father in the crowd.

“…being boss!”

He’s smiling but it isn’t the kind of smile that reaches his eyes and Maya knows what that means. She jogs over to him nervously.

“Dad, what are you doing here?” she questions.

“Well, I saw you on the news, I wanted to watch you actually do something.”

His words sting and Maya doesn’t want him there. She has seen him like this before, he is wound up tightly and ready to uncoil – another bomb just waiting to explode.

“Dad, you can’t…”

She wants to tell him that he can’t be here and he should wait for her at the station, or at home, but he cuts her off.

“Don’t dad me. Go do something, Captain! Go!”

Maya shoots him a bemused smile, a discomfort spreading through her body. It is the same discomfort she used to have when she was a teenager, when her dad would watch her chatting to her friends in between laps, knowing that she would get reprimanded once they got home for resting instead of stretching or keeping warm.

Panic flares up inside of her as she walks back to the team and she pushes it down, knowing she needs to concentrate on her work right now with her team in danger. Gibson had said something about a suspicious device before going quiet. 19 are the best, she knows that, but right now they’re trapped in a basement with what might be a third bomb and no way out, and her stomach churns with fear. She knows she can’t let that fear overwhelm her, that it is her job to get them out of there alive.

“Bomb squad are nearly here,” Sato tells her when she rejoins him. If he wonders who the man in the crowd is, he doesn’t ask. “Any more communication from your team?”

Maya shakes her head. “No, nothing.” She pulls her radio towards her mouth. “Gibson? Gibson, do you copy?”

There is no answer and she tries again.

“Gibson?”

All she needs is one word from him and she clenches her jaw in frustration when she doesn’t get a reply.

“Chief Sato?” a voice behind her causes her to turn her head to see a short, stocky man brandishing a Bomb Squad vest.

Sato steps forward. “Officer Turner?”

Turner nods. He is flanked by a number of colleagues, each kitted out in protective gear. They shake hands but don’t bother with pleasantries, knowing that time is critical.

“This is Captain Bishop, Station 19. It’s her team inside.”

“Bring me up to speed,” Turner asks.

“We have 5 firefighters and a civilian trapped in the basement with what we think is a suspicious device,” Maya tells him. “And now we have no communication.”

“They switched off radios to avoid any electrical interference with the detonator,” Turner says. “It’s smart.”

It might be smart but it doesn’t bring Maya any comfort when she can’t communicate with them.

“Our crew is on the move…”

“Hey kiddo!” suddenly her dad is calling for her again. “Kiddo! Come here.” He gestures for her to come closer and he looks pissed. Maya’s heart sinks, but she scurries over to him obediently.

“Hey dad, you should probably wait for me at home,” she says, keeping her tone light, knowing it is a false hope that he’ll go away quietly.

“Your family’s falling apart and you’re playing fire captain?” Lane spits at her.

Maya frowns at his unnecessary insult. “I’m not playing anything, I am captain,” she says.

“Did your mother fill your head with drama?” Lane confronts her. “Hmm? Is that why you’re treating me this way?”

Maya’s instinct tells her to walk away, to get away from her father when he is in this mood. She never could when she was a child, but she has work this time and he will at least respect that – right?

“You know, Dad, I have to go,” she says, turning to leave.

In one swift movement, Lane lifts the tape and ducks under it, striding towards her. “Don’t raise your voice at me, young lady.”

Maya feels self-conscious, knowing that eyes are starting to turn to look at them as he gets riled up. Her heart starts to beat harder in her chest and she takes a deep breath, willing it to calm down.

“Dad, I need you to get back behind the tape,” Maya says, trying to sound more confident than she feels.

Lane holds his ground, refusing to move as he glares angrily at her.

“Dad, interfering with emergency personnel is a crime, I’m not going to ask you again,” Maya says.

“Are you threatening me?” Lane asks, pushing his way into Maya’s space.

Maya takes a deep breath, summoning up as much courage as she can muster. “I am in charge and I’m ordering you to leave my scene.”

Lane squares up to her. “What did you say?”

“You heard me.” She turns to leave, refusing to argue with him in front of the crowd.

What happens next takes her by surprise and she is not expecting it when he wraps his hand around her ponytail, yanking it hard. She staggers backwards while she finds the strength to wrestle out of his grip.

“Get your hands off of me!” she yells at him as she pushes him away.

Maya feels herself suddenly surrounded by a mass of people from the fire department, bomb squad and police department. She glares back at him, unable to believe what just happened.

“Oh yeah, oh, you need your big strong men to fight your battles, huh Captain,” Lane taunts her.

Maya snaps. “No Dad, I don’t! I don’t need to win my gold medals for other people. Unlike you, I win them myself!”

Lane Bishop looks taken aback at the way his daughter stands up to him and he falls silent. He is restrained by an officer from SPD and doesn’t bother to struggle, he can do nothing but watch as Maya turns his back on her.

“I’m fine!” Maya barks. “Everybody back to work.”

Maya strides back to the scene, her whole body shaking as she tries to get a hold of her emotions. Her mind spins as she thinks about what just happened: the way her dad turned up at the scene to confront her; the way it turned physical out of the blue; the way she yelled at him in front of a crowd of people, something she has never done before. She rubs the back of her head absentmindedly where her hair was pulled so violently and she tucks her ponytail into the back of her turnout coat. She can feel her hands shaking as she moves, and she curls her fists to hide it. Her heart is racing and she takes a deep breath, desperate to calm herself before the team join her again.

‘Five things you can see,’ she thinks to herself, remembering the grounding technique that Carina taught her. A car, a fire engine, an extended ladder, a hose, broken glass on the ground. ‘Four things you can touch…’

She is walking through the steps as Sato and Turner approach.

“Bishop…?” Sato starts.

“I’m fine,” Maya interjects, softer this time. She doesn’t give them the chance to ask any more questions. “Still no word from 19. How long has it been since Gibson’s message?”

“About 25 minutes,” Sato says. “The team are inside drilling through the debris to get to the basement.”

“How long will it take?” Maya asks, impatient to get her team to safety.

“Hard to say,” Sato answers. “Five, maybe ten minutes.”

Maya nods. There is nothing they can do but wait, except Maya doesn’t have a lot of patience right now. As if the universe knows that she needs a distraction, something catches her eyes and she turns to watch as three police officers approach Chief Dixon, who is still holding court with the press. She can’t quite hear what they say to him, but watches as they cuff him and lead him away. She can’t help but smile as he passes, knowing it is about time he got his comeuppance.

Suddenly, from inside the hospital, there is a muffled boom and her stomach twists in knots.

“What the…” she starts to say. A voice comes through the radio.

“Explosion in the basement,” comes a voice through the radio. “Structure still intact, we’re about to break through.”

Maya lifts her radio. “19? 19, do you copy?” She gets silence again. “Gibson? Hughes? Montgomery? Miller? Warren?” She reels off their names, holding her breath as she waits desperately for one of them will reply to her.

She hears a crackle.

“Bishop?” she hears Jack’s voice.

“Jack! Are you guys okay?”

“We’re fine,” Jack says. “Our patient didn’t make it but the rest of us are okay.”

Maya lets out a deep sigh of relief. “Glad to hear it, Lieutenant. Not get your butts out of there.”

“You can proceed,” Chief Sato says to Turner and his team, nodding towards the hospital.

Maya nods her thanks to Turner as he leads his team inside, then turns towards Chief Sato, who is looking at her with concern.

“Listen, about earlier…”

“It won’t happen again, Sir,” Maya says.

“That’s not what I was going to say,” Sato says gently. “I was going to say, if you need any assistance, the FD will support you.”

Maya blushes with embarrassment. “Thank you, Sir. I’ll be fine.”

Chief Sato nods and moves across the forecourt to the firefighters from 23. Maya picks up her radio again. “I want bomb squad to comb through every inch of that hospital. If there were four, who knows how many more there are.”

She turns just as the team from 19 emerge from the hospital. Maya has never been so happy to see them. They walk towards her, their arms full of boxes. She watches as they notice the police car pulling away with Dixon in the back seat.

“Is that…?” Jack wonders.

“It sure as hell is,” Ben says, offering a cheeky salute.

“I never want to forget this moment,” Vic says. “I want it etched in my memory forever.”

“Forever and ever,” Travis agrees.

“See? Told y’all,” Dean notes. “Sex offender.”

Maya revels in the sound of their banter. “Why are we carrying rodents, 19?” she asks them.

“Because we’re saving the lives of untold millions,” Jack tells her.

Maya smiles, bemused, as Vic leans in as she passes her.

“You know, like we do,” Vic teases.

Maya watches as they unload the items in their arms. She spies Jack speaking to a member of Station 23 and they both look towards her when they think she is not paying attention, and she guesses that Jack is being told about the incident with her dad. She hates being the subject of gossip but doesn’t have it in her to even shoot them a pissed look at this point.

With her team back to safety and the hospital evacuated except for the bomb squad who were inside looking for more explosives, Maya instructs everyone to head back to the station. She jumps into the engine with Vic, Travis and Ben, only half-listening to them as they recount the moment that Jack carried the bomb to the autoclave. Her mind wanders back to her encounter with her father. She hasn’t heard from him since – no phone calls, no angry messages – and she still feels on edge at what might happen next. It is not like Lane Bishop to back down from a fight.

There is a pulsing ache at back of her head where the force at which he pulled her hair still lingers. Her ponytail feels heavy and she twists her neck back and forth, trying to shake the feeling, but it won’t go away. She has an overwhelming urge to chop it off and free herself from its weight, and the thought sits with her as they drive.

“You okay, Bishop?” Ben asks, noticing how quiet she is.

“Hmm? Yeah, I’m fine. Just feeling the effects from last night,” she lies.

He seems to accept her answer and the conversation turns to the events from the night before, as Vic fills him in on their drunken antics.  

They pile into the locker room when they get back to the station, squabbling over who is going to have the first shower. Maya stops by her office first and grabs the pair of scissors from her desk, then slips past everyone else and into the bathroom.

She stares at her reflection in the mirror, her face hard and sad – a far cry from the happiness that used to exude out of her when Carina was around. She wants to go back to the person she was becoming, the person who was learning to fill her life with more than just work. The person who was happy and in love.  

Maya hesitates, the tips of her fingers tingling in anticipation of what she is about to do. Maya has had long hair since she was a little girl, when everyone would run their hands over her head and tell her how pretty she was. But the sensation of her father tugging her hair and pulling her backwards lingers and won’t go away, and she wants to be free of it. She wants to be free of him.

With a shaky breath, Maya loosens her ponytail, lifts the scissors and starts to cut. She hears the blades slicing through her hair and it almost makes her stop, but it’s too late now. She has to finish. She doesn’t know how long it takes, but it feels like forever until her ponytail comes loose in her left hand. She lets go of the breath she was holding as she takes in how short and choppy her hair is now.

She looks different somehow. Even though she is used to seeing her face with her hair scraped back, her new bob looks strange on her. It doesn’t really change how she is feeling. The pain and regret are still there, threatening to overwhelm her if she just gives them the opportunity.

Jack finds her a few moments later and she glances at him via the reflection in the mirror.

“I was so stupid,” she says bluntly. “Everyone saw the truth about my dad but me. Everyone.”

Jack leans against the doorframe, watching her. He can tell that she is processing what happened this afternoon and he hangs back, giving her the space she needs. “It’s how these things usually go,” he says with a small shrug.

“I ruined the best relationship I ever had because of him,” Maya says bitterly.

Jack doesn’t know what went down between Maya and Carina, but he knows that he has never seen Maya as happy and content as she has been these last few months, and he knows she’d be a fool not to try and make amends. “You could apologise.”

Maya drops her head sorrowfully. “It’s too late for that. Way too late.”

“You’d be surprised how far an ‘I’m sorry’ can get you,” Jack says pointedly.

Maya knows she treated him like crap that day, that she had been mean and had preyed on his weaknesses to get him to stop pushing her so hard. She had been so caught up in her own feelings that she hadn’t stopped to think about his.

She turns to look at him. “I’m sorry, Jack.”

Jack offers her a small smile in acceptance of her apology. “We’re all going to the houseboat, gonna raise a glass to Dixon’s demise,” he says, inviting her to join them.

Maya smiles gratefully, but shakes her head. “No, I can’t. Have fun.”

Jack nods, understanding her reasons, and points at her hair. “Hair looks kinda cool.”

Maya smiles despite the tears that pool in her eyes. Jack turns and walks away, leaving her alone with her thoughts. The truth is, she has been too scared to apologise to Carina. Too scared to admit how badly she hurt her, too scared to see the inevitable anger in Carina’s eyes. Too scared to admit that she made a mistake because she wasn’t ready to face the truth of what everyone had been saying and acknowledge that her childhood had been hard and exhausting. Too scared of Carina telling her that she will never forgive her.

Except if she never apologises, she will never know if she can earn back Carina’s trust, and she wants that more than anything.  

Maya runs her hand over the ponytail in her hand and takes a deep breath, before heading out of the bathroom, knowing what she needs to do. She ignores the curious glances that come from her team as they take in her newly cut hair; she doesn’t see Jack shake his head at them, silently telling them not to ask any questions as she walks out of the locker room and towards her office.

She changes quickly, grabs her bag and heads out to her car. It is a short drive to the hospital and she has no time to think about what she is going to say to Carina when she sees her. She knows what she wants to say, the words have been swirling around her head all week so she is just going to wing it and hope that it is enough.

She pulls into the car park and jumps out of her car, heading for the front entrance. She doesn’t see Carina at first, too focused on her destination as she strides along the path, weaving in and out of the people around her, but the pale pink colour of her scrubs catches her eye as she passes her talking to a surgeon she doesn’t recognise. Maya stops and takes a deep breath, knowing it is now and never. She turns.

“Carina.”

[hexalianrebel-blackfeathers]

No Flash Photography

Panda's Notes: @rosileeduckie IT'S DONE!! >w< This story was inspired by Ro's story "Pics or It Didn't Happen, Bro", which is an awesome little story that I love going back to. I couldn't help dying for a sequel, and I somehow got their blessing to make an unofficial one of my own. >w<

Find it/both on AO3!

Iida fiddled a bit anxiously with his phone, just trying to decide if he was willing to take the risk. To throw himself back into the proverbial lion’s den just for…what? Nothing really.

Nothing material, at least.

His phone buzzed against his palm, making him flinch and nearly drop it. Of course, it was another in a long list of messages in the group chat egging each other on. He rolled his eyes before skimming over—

Wait.

Sero: Look, I know we’ve all been saying it as a joke, but I’m stepping up.

Sero: Class Rep, since this is your fault, I dare you to “win” another #ticklefightwithBakugou. Pics or it didn’t happen, right guys?

There was a new onslaught of quick messages and shocked or laughing emojis as the class gossips alerted Iida to the callout.

Iida: You’re really calling me out, huh? What’s the catch?

Mina: Pretty sure the catch is getting the pics before Bakugou finds out you took the dare lol

“If you don’t quit texting and fucking move, I will flip this board onto you.”

Joke’s on them; he was already toeing the line there.

Iida chuckled softly, setting his phone face-down underneath his leg and looking over the chess board between them. He pushed one of his rooks forward, and he tried to resist a smile when Bakugou tsked under his breath.

“Why did you have to pick fucking chess, Four-Eyes?”

“You said you didn’t want to help with the puzzle; you could have said no.”

“Mmph…” Bakugou tapped one of his pawns on the board before shifting it forward. “So, what are those losers talking about anyway?”

It was a little interesting knowing he wasn’t included under the “losers” umbrella this time, and Iida tipped his head to look over the board.

“Oh, you know…” He hummed, unsure how much he could let on. “Same memes every week; Yaoyorozu’s scheduling study sessions for that test we have coming up—” He set down the pawn he’d chosen, his eyes searching for something of interest.

“Any new bets going around?” Bakugou snatched up the pawn, and swapped it with his bishop, smirking slightly across the table at Iida.

Iida tapped his fingers on his knee for a moment, biting his lip as he tried to keep his face in check. “Ah, well, I haven’t really been in that channel lately. Why?” He shifted another pawn forward.

Bakugou huffed and shrugged his shoulder. “No reason, I guess, just…” And the bishop took the offered pawn. “That #ticklefightwithBakugou thing is still going around, isn’t it?”

Iida let a chuckle slip, putting his hands up when Bakugou glowered at him. “You’re still thinking about that? Are you afraid someone might take advantage?” The question was emphasized by Bakugou’s bishop getting unceremoniously trampled by Iida’s knight. If looks could kill, the class rep’s head would have exploded.

“Don’t even think about putting fucking words in my mouth, four-eyes.” Bakugou practically snarled, moving one of his own knights out from its starting position. “I asked because I’m still catching shit from Pinky and Tapeface asking if you were lying or not.”

“Did you tell them?” There might have been a teasing little note to Iida’s voice as he castled his king and rook, and he yelped when Bakugou gave him a swift kick to his shin.

“If I had told them; they would have told the whole damn school, dumbass. Of course I didn’t tell them.” A pawn was inched forward as he buried his pouting mouth in his hand.

“You’re scared they’ll find out you’re all ticklish, huh?” One of Iida’s bishops was advancing.

“You shut your fucking mouth.” Bakugou grumbled, moving his rook halfway across the board as he attempted to cover the hint of red crawling up his face.

Iida couldn’t help smiling as he scooted a pawn. “That’s kind of adorable, Bakugou. What if…I got you again?” He asked softly as Bakugou was reaching for a piece.

Bakugou’s hand flinched, and the lone bishop clicked as the magnet in its base reattached to the board. He glared over at Iida again before a smirk spread across his face. He picked up the bishop again, and he set it down with a renewed confidence. “I knew you were up to something, you little shit.”

“What?!” Iida feigned offense, crushing one of Bakugou’s pawns under his rook. “I’m not up to anything. You brought it up.”

Bakugou hummed and looked over the board as Iida was putting the captured pawn to the side. “I wonder why I don’t believe you.”

Iida shrugged a bit himself, glancing away when Bakugou looked up at him again. “Perhaps you’re a bit paranoid? I can relate, actually; I remember when the year started, a few of our classmates made a similar bet targeting me.”

Bakugou snorted, remembering that couple of weeks back in May. The others had taken turns cracking bad jokes and sneaking pokes to the class rep’s sides in attempts to make him laugh. “Oh, yeah, that’s right…” He smirked as Iida was moving a knight, moving his bishop into an attacking position. “You’re pretty ticklish yourself.”

It was Iida’s turn to flinch a little, a nervous smile forcing itself across his face. A few syllables tripped and stumbled out of his mouth as he moved his knight to escape.

“And!” Bakugou piped up again. “If I remember correctly, you kind of like being tickled.” His bishop zipped forward, catching a pawn off guard.

“I—What? W-Where would you get that idea?” Iida cleared his throat when his voice came out squeakily, shifting his rook to snatch one of Bakugou’s pawns.

“Because, Speed Racer, you are a shitty liar. Plus:” Bakugou’s knight suddenly appeared and nudged Iida’s rook, and his fingers moved with a bit of wiggling flair before he snapped them sharply and pointed to himself. “My eyes are up here.”

Iida blushed brightly. He hadn’t even noticed that he’d been watching his opponent’s hands that closely. And being redirected to that smirking face and piercing stare didn’t help him at all.

Bakugou chuckled softly, watching as Iida hesitantly moved his only unseated pawn. “So, what was your little plan, huh? Did you even have one?”

“Mm, I suppose not.” He admitted, releasing a shaky breath when none of his pieces were taken this time. “It’s not exactly an easy win condition, you see.”

Bakugou hummed and gave a slight nod, picking up his Queen. “Pics or it didn’t happen, right?” He set it down with a resounding tap, pulling the now defeated knight off the board as Iida stared across the board at him. “Check. Your move, bitch.”

Iida pounced.

The chess board clattered as one of their flailing legs kicked it off of the couch, most of the magnetic pieces zipping back to the board while the others went AWOL.

“When the fuck did you get so heavy?!” Bakugou snapped, pawing at Iida’s arms as the taller boy was attempting to straddle his legs.

Iida sacrificed his arm, grabbing at one of Bakugou’s wrists while his free hand pulled his phone out of the pocket on his leg. Bakugou reached and attempted to slap at his arm, a fiercely determined smile on his face as his struggling nearly pushed Iida over.

Iida couldn’t resist the giggles that were slipping out of him, and he nearly lost his balance when Bakugou’s free hand suddenly attacked his side with scribbling nails. But his camera was open, and he tightened his grip on Bakugou’s wrist as he quickly looked for an opening while keeping his phone out of his victim’s reach.

And he spotted it. He held his phone up over Bakugou’s face, and when he tried to snatch it, Iida released the wrist he’d captured in favor of shoving that hand into Bakugou’s exposed armpit.

That previously smug face was caught in full view of the camera as is shifted instantly from shock to splitting open with a loud laugh.

“Y-You fucker!” He barked out, both of his hands retreating to press against his ribcage as he started to writhe a bit. His feet flailed and pushed against the couch behind Iida, a hint of red quickly filling his cheeks as a snort broke out of his chest. He immediately covered his face when the sound escaped, unable to stop the two others that followed it as his free hand tried to slap Iida’s phone again. “Fuck off, four-eyes!” He barely squeaked out through helpless giggles.

Iida’s face lit up as he finally stopped recording, taking a victory lap of sorts by giving a few more teasing scribbles as he navigated his phone with one hand. Bakugou struggled and clutched at Iida’s arm, and the class rep nearly buckled when those nails dug ticklishly into his elbow.

“Ha!” Iida suddenly exclaimed, laughing a bit himself. “I got it!” He grinned playfully down at Bakugou as the group chat came to life from his universal tag.

Sero: HOLY SHIT MAN I WAS KIDDING

Mina: LOL A true king!

Ochacco: He’s so cute!!

The comments went on like that and spurred a bout of conversation in that channel, several of their classmates following Mina’s lead and spamming the video with crown reactions. Half of the ones in attendance were also tagging Bakugou for confirmation, as if this weren’t literally happening right now.

Iida giggled softly, letting his fingers still and pulling his hand back. He turned his phone to give Bakugou a glance. “You’re trending, Katsuki.”

Bakugou panted softly, but his eyes fell on the screen within a second. “I’m always trending, fuckface.” He scoffed, crossing his arms and shrugging.

Iida shook his head and chuckled, scrolling back to play the video back for himself: the way Bakugou broke so quickly from that one spot; pulled his hands in tight and just laughed; The way he smiled and just succumbed to—

Wait a second.

“You…” Iida murmured, his eyes widening slightly as he realized he was still straddling his former victim. “You let me win.”

“Hm?” Bakugou hummed, resting his head on his hand as he propped it on his elbow. “What do you mean~?”

Iida’s face fell into a pout at that playful tone. “Why did you… Why would you?”

“Hm…” Bakugou sighed and hummed, scratching casually at his face and running his free hand through his hair. “Why would I let you win…? Why would I basically throw a bet to let you look good?”

Iida crossed his arms, scooting back slightly as Bakugou moved to sit up.

“Well, I don’t know.” Bakugou sighed with a shrug. “Oh, wait.”

He suddenly lunged forward, and Iida only noticed his phone being snatched from his hand before he was being manhandled. The pair of them wrestled; okay, Iida tried to wrestle, but Bakugou managed to get behind him and yank him back against his chest.

“W-What are you doing?!” Iida cried, attempting to flail as Bakugou’s free arm wrapped across his chest. A squeal jumped out of his mouth as fingers scribbled softly at his ribs.

“Take a wild guess, four-eyes.” Bakugou smirked, wrapping his legs loosely around Iida’s waist before holding up the stolen phone and tapping the screen a few times to start a video call. “Anyone who’s not a fucking coward better get on call right the fuck now.”

“Wait, that’s not fai—!” Iida shrieked as both of their faces appeared in a small window, getting cut off by his own loud giggles when Bakugou started to tickle him again.

The text chat lit up again with shocked comments and laughter before several small windows popped up in the call, with Sero and Ashido, of course, being the loudest.

“This is your king, huh?!” Bakugou asked teasingly, skittering his fingers up and down Iida’s ribs and toward his stomach and smirking broadly at his captive’s writhing. “This giggly, string-bean bitch?!”

“Don’t let him win, Iida!” Ashido laughed, waving at her webcam.

“Pfft, rest in peace, class rep!” Kaminari taunted, and Kirishima covered his mouth with his textbook beside him.

“This is why I don’t play the hashtag games with you guys!” Midoriya insisted, trying not to laugh. “Kacchan’s mean!”

Bakugou chuckled as he watched the text conversations go on beneath the excited chatter on the video call, sneaking his hand up to scribble under Iida’s chin.

“You losers better believe I’m fucking mean.” He growled, grinning wider. “You want a tickle fight; I’ll bring you a fucking war.”

He moved his hand up quickly, pulling Iida’s head close so he could press a loud raspberry against the side of his neck. The class rep’s shriek was parroted by a couple of the girls squealing excitedly along with taunts and jabs from all of them.

“B-Bakugou, please!” Iida whined, trying to paw at Bakugou’s hand as he giggled and laughed.

“Which one of them dies next?”

“What?! I-I—No!” He wailed as Bakugou blew another raspberry on his neck.

“Pick one of them, or I will end this call and find your kill spot.”

There was a chorus of chatter as cameras quickly shut off, but their friends’ voices still cheered them both on. Bakugou’s fingers were attempting to worm under Iida’s arm, and he curled in tight as he laughed a bit louder.

“Tick-tock, bitch~” Bakugou purred, leaning into his neck again.

“Sero! I pick Sero!” Iida cried out, his face running red as he felt Bakugou’s lips pressing gently before pulling away.

“Oh, my gods, you narc!” Sero laughed, and most of the others started to tease him too.

“You heard him, Tapeface. You’d better be ready.” Bakugou growled playfully, curling his fingers into a claw and digging them into Iida’s back to get a good shriek before finally cutting the video call.

Iida leaned heavily against Bakugou’s shoulder, lost in a haze of giggles as the blonde gave him a few more teasing scribbles. Turnabout is fair play, after all. He recognized the sound of his phone’s camera clicking before Bakugou finally gave him a push and slipped out from under him.

“I think #ticklefightwithBakugou is going to need its own channel soon.” Bakugou chuckled, tossing Iida’s phone onto his stomach after another moment.

Iida flinched a bit at the impact, only making a move to catch it when it felt like it would fall. As he finally caught his breath, he looked at the screen. Four new photos: all of them selfies of the pair of them with Bakugou mugging and Iida laughing himself silly; and a fifth one: Bakugou planting a kiss on Iida’s cheek while the boy’s glasses were skewed off of his face.

“Well, four-eyes,” Bakugou called with a sneer, having already made his way halfway to the stairs. “You coming or what?”

Iida blushed again and swallowed the lump in his throat, fixing his glasses before pocketing his phone. “You know what, why not?” He smiled back, hopping up to follow.

It wasn’t until he shook a little magnetic rook from his slipper on the third landing that he remembered the mess they’d left. Bakugou just laughed at him when he suggested they go back.

[honeyapplepi]

The Knight’s Court: Part Four

warnings: none

royalty au, in game au

> As soon to be ruler of their kingdom, Y/N L/N is newly appointed with knights to protect them. Y/N quickly comes to find out it’s hard to fall in love with someone you’re not supposed to especially when you’re betrothed to another.

a/n: I have a tag list so if you wanna be added message or send and ask. This took a little bit longer than i wanted, but stuff happened with my electricity so i couldn’t do it, but hopefully i’ll get the next part out the day after tomorrow but no promises.

sapnap x gn!reader, wilbur x gn!reader (later on)

tag list: @kiritokunuwu

masterlist | part one | part five

The chess game started off with a move from you. Usually you played the black pieces, but Dream had asked to play them and you didn’t want to be rude and say no. You had moved your pawn that stood in front of your king. up two squares. Dream quickly made his move which was moving his pawn in the same way you moved yours.

It was quiet for the first few moves, but it didn’t take long for Dream to start talking. “You’re pretty good. How long have you been playing?,” he asked. You didn’t answer right away since you were making your fourth move and didn’t want to lose focus.

“Since I was a kid. The kingdom is small so there isn’t much to do, so I play chess. Also check,” you said answering Dream. Dream turned his head down at the board and way from you and seeing his king lined up with your queen.

“How long have you been playing?,” you asked Dream as he moved his piece saving his king.

“A few years now,” he answered. You nodded as a response moving your queen to put him in check again. As dream began to think about his next move you turned towards Sapnap who had been quietly watching since you and George’s game.

“What about you?,” you asked catching his attention.

“Hmm?,” Sapnap responded.

“Do you play chess?,” you asked turning back to the board to make your move since Dream made his.

“Uhhh, not really. I’ve played before, but not very much,” Sapnap answered.

You made your move moving your bishop in a direct path to Dream’s king. “Is there a lot to do where you guys are from?,” you asked as Dream began to think about where he would move his king.

“Well it’s pretty big, so there is quite a bit. Mainly though there’s a lot to do because there’s a lot of people,” Sapnap answered you.

“There isn’t much to do here since it’s a small place, plus there aren’t that many people,” you said. You looked back at the board and watched as Dream moved his pawn down two.

You then moved your bishop and took Dream’s pawn putting him in check again. “Besides here, of course, have you two been anywhere else besides your kingdom?,” you asked them. 

“There aren’t too many kingdoms around here, so not too many places, but we have been to L’Manberg,” Dream answered your question moving his piece. 

“L’Manberg, what’s it like. Have you been recently I heard there’s a new king?,” You said before taking a moment to think about your next move. 

“I’ve been there recently, but, uhh, not Dream. The king’s name is Wilbur he has two brothers I believe. I think his brother was supposed to inherit the thrown, but he’s an anarchist or something. I'm not sure,” Sapnap said as you moved your piece. 

“I don’t really know a lot about the other kingdoms which is kind of stupid for someone who’s about to rule,” you frowned.

“Well I can teach you about the other kingdoms sometime. To help you prepare,” Sapnap said getting quieter with each word. 

“Sounds great,” you said watching as Dream made his move on the chessboard even though you were going to win the game. 

“I'm going to win,” You said looking at Dream as he looked at the chessboard his hand holding up his face. 

“Yeah, yeah. I know,” Dream said making his final move causing your inevitable win. You smiled proudly and went to collect the pieces. Before you went to put them in their box you turned towards Sapnap. 

“Do you want to play?. We have time before supper,”  you asked him. 

“Uhh, no. I’m not that good,” Sapnap told you. 

“Maybe one day I can teach you. To return the favor,” you smiled. “Maybe,” Sapnap responded. 

“I’ll get going. See you at supper,” you said standing from your seat and heading back into the castle. 

“Sapnap, what the hell?,” Dream whispered loudly toward Sapnap. 

“What are you talking about?,” Sapnap asked completely clueless to what Dream was trying to say. 

“You are so bad at flirting,” Dream laughed. 

“Your majesty, your father request you in his office,” one of the servants said as you entered the main hall of the castle. a you nodded as a response and made your way through the hall.

You walked towards your father’s office knocking when you reached the doors. It didn’t take long for the large doors to be opened by your father’s butlers.

“Y/N, sit down,” your father said. You obliged and took a seat in front of his desk.

“I want to make sure you like the guards. You’ve only know them for a short while so it’s not too late to get new ones. I just want to make sure you are happy with them since you see them all day,” your father said.

“They’re fine. I mean they’re kind and not to bad of people, so i’m sure everything will be fine,” you told your father.

“Okay, tell me if anything changes,” your father told you.

“Of course,” you told him. Your father nodded and then sent you to get ready for supper.

[starrynite7114]

the way you love me: part one

A/N: YA GIRL IS BACK. This time with a different type of story! It’s going to be a Rio/Reader/Angel story! I’ve had this in the back burner for quite some time, but I’m glad I can finally share it with you all. I was listening to ‘I Love The Way You Love Me’ by Boyzone, yes, I love the oldies. LOL But anyway, I wanted to share this with you all! Let me know what you think! 

Also, let me know if you would like to be added to the tag list!

Hope you all are having a good start of the week thus far!

Snapshots is almost done and will be posted on Wednesday! WOOOOH!

Warnings: Angst, Fluff

Masterlist

tagged list: @justahopelessssromantic​ : @ifoundmyhappythought​ : @carlaangel86​ : @woahitslucyylu​ : @encounterthepast​ : @enamoured-x​ : @thewarriorprincessxo​ : @briana-mishell24​ : @bribri-82​ : @chibsytelford​ : @agirllovespasta​ : @twistnet​ : @everyhowlmarksthedead​ : @trulysuccubus​ : @jadert15​ : @sammskellington​ : @cind-in-real-life​ :  @onmyspookysblock​ : @sadeyesgf​ : @thickemadame​ : @summertimesadnesswithadashofsass​ : @gemini0410​ : @elcococruz​ : @samcrobae​ : @sesamepancakes​ : @iambabyharry​ : @blackmissfrizzle​ : @mrs-losa​ : @1-800-imagines​ : @phoenixhalliwell​ : @lady-pswrld​ : @dazzledamazon​  : @getyourcrayoncas​ : @fvckthisbxtchup​ : @lukealvxz​ : @scuzmunkie​ : @lilac-tea-time​ : @danie1432​ : @cocotheclown​ : @soaronmywings​ : @my-rosegold-soul​ : @buttercup812​ : @un-poetryy​ : @angelreyesgirl​ : @sheeshgivemeabreak​ : @vicmackeybullshxt​ : @bigcreatorwombatdreamer​ : @khyharah​ : @strawberrywritings​ : @cherry-icetea​ : @fuzzy-jellyfish​ : @losolvidad0s​ : @brownsugarcoffy​ : @courtrae89​ : @prdsdjarin​ : @blessedboo​ : @marvelmaree​ : @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat​ : @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead​ : @thesandbeneathmytoes​ : @dark-twisted-and-mechanical-mind​ : @maddie-georges​ : @pearlkitten33​ : @aquamento​ : @incorrect-mcdanno​ : @that-chick212​ : @imanerdychubbyqueen​ : @60shannon​ : @deeandbobbymcgee​ : @rebel-without-cause-x​​ : @marquelapage​ : @justlikebreathing​

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Your adoptive father, Bishop questioned as you looked at yourself in the mirror.

Your wedding dress was breathtaking, the veil was lace, covering your made up face, a natural look was what you requested. This was going to be the happiest day of your life. You were marrying the man you love and you could not wait to meet him at the altar.

But why did this feeling of dread rested at the pit of your stomach?

“Of course,” your eyes met his eyes through the mirror. “I love him.”

“I somehow doubt that.”

“Dad, I appreciate it I do, but what’s done is done. He made his choice and we all have to live with it. Not like it matters to me what he chose, but I’m happy for him.” You managed to smile through the pain. The wound was fresh, but that was to no surprise.

“Do you want me to kill Angel?” Bishop has offered this to you numerous times and you always laughed it off even though you knew he was absolutely serious.

“No, of course not, you know he’s your favorite shithead.”

Bishop had to smirk at that. “He is, but you’re my little girl.”

When you were four years old, your parents died due to a tragic accident. Ironically enough, they were riding your father’s motorcycle and a car came out of nowhere and hit them. 

Drunk driver.

Typical story.

Due to that, Bishop gained sole custody of you. Your parents had no other family, at least none that they wanted you to stay with. So you were left to the care of your father’s best friend, Obispo Losa.

You left Santo Padre years ago, but five months ago, you came back to accompany your fiancé, Christopher ‘Rio’ Vasquez.

Five Months Earlier

You let out a yawn as the captain announced that you would shortly be landing. After you left California five years ago, you had no intention of coming back. Too many memories of heartache and tears that you much rather not deal with. 

But Rio insisted you came with him.

“Take a vacation with me.” You remembered him asking you and you wanted to laugh. California was hardly a vacation.

Okay, it was, you just didn’t like that you were going to Santo Padre. Of all the fucking places that Rio’s cousin lived, it had to be Santo Padre? But it’s been years, Angel Reyes was just part of your memories now.

===============

You frowned as Angel sat across from you, hands folded on the table. You two were at an impasse. Everyone in the club knew you two were together. Hell, Angel made it known so no one would even try to make a move on you.

But outside that little bubble, Angel treated you like a stranger.

It was the same bullshit anyone doing shady shit would say.

“I’m trying to protect you, you are my girl, not everyone has to know it.”

But they do.

Because you felt like you were there out of convenience, that Angel only came to you when he wanted someone and it was the truth. Your interactions were limited at the comforts of the clubhouse and your homes. Otherwise, it was as if you two were hardly friends.

This has been ongoing for three years and as optimistic as you wanted to be. The endless fights and empty promises has broken you.

“I’m done.” You told Angel. “Though, you can't be done with something that was never there.”

“Babe, don’t do this, come on. I’ll try to be better, this is for you.” And it was true. This was Angel’s greatest fear that someone would realize how important you were to him and hurt you, he couldn’t live with that. 

“Right, so that girl on your lap was all for show.” You scoffed. “So when you kissed her at the privacy of our inner circle, it was for show?”

Angel sighed. “You know I love you.”

“You have such a great way of showing it.” You stood up. “I’m gonna go, there’s nothing for me here.”

“What about me? What about us?” Angel felt that he was losing you quickly and there was nothing he could do.

But it wasn’t quickly, this was years in the making.

“I’m not your girl, remember?” You reminded him of that painful statement you heard him utter at the clubhouse when you decided to surprise him.

Well, he could be single now. 

You were done.

===============

“You okay mama’s?” You heard Rio check, breaking you away from your thoughts. 

You turned to face him, reaching over to kiss him. “Yeah, I’m good.”

“I’m excited for you to meet my family.” Rio kissed the back of your hand. “They’ll love you, maybe not as much as me, but they will.”

“Well, I can’t wait for you to meet my family here.” You beamed. Bishop has met Rio, since he always came to see you during the Holidays.

‘We’ve spent the holidays together since you were born, nothing is going to change that.’

He would always tell you and you loved him for that. Even though you lost your parents, you never felt the loneliness since you always had Bishop. 

And Taza.

And Hank.

And Riz.

And Creeper.

And Coco.

And Gilly.

And somehow, even Angel. 

“Am I gonna meet the infamous ex as well?” Rio was not an insecure man. He knew that you love him and he loves you. Whoever this man was, he would never win you back. Rio would put a bullet in between his eyes first. 

You never told Rio his name, Angel was never your boyfriend.

“He wasn’t my boyfriend.”

“Right, fuck buddy or whatever.” Rio chuckled, his drawl was always such a turn on for you. The way he spoke, that tone, the voice, he was so much. “Doesn’t matter mama, you have me now.” He kissed your inner wrist, smiling against your skin.

Rio was a man you met while you were at your job as a bartender. After moving out of Santo Padre, you didn’t stay in California, you moved to the East Coast. You were done and you didn’t want to linger in California. You changed your number and everything. 

It was difficult. You didn’t want to leave your father, but he knew what you had to do. He offered to remove Angel from the club, but you refused. The club was all that Angel had, and yet again, you made the sacrifice for him 

But it was the last one.

You were done with that part of your life after all. 

Rio was a persistent man. When he wanted something, he pursued it till he got it. And that’s what he did to you. At first, you thought maybe he was a flirt, but you realized it wasn’t like that at all. Every night women would try to catch his attention, but it was always solely focused on you. You always thought it was due to the fact you were serving him drinks, but that was hardly the case.

===============

“So when are you giving me your number mami?” Rio questioned before he took a drink of his usual poison.

“My number?” You laughed. “What would you want with that? You got a job for me?”

This man was too damn good looking. The voice, the swagger, the aura and those fucking tattoos, it was making you forget your vow of avoiding the bad boys. 

Though, you were assuming since for all you know, he might be a doctor or or something. 

“I was hoping for more of a date, but if getting you a job gets me a date, say no more beautiful.” He smirked, that devilish smirk that made your knees weak.

===============

Rio held your hand as you two made your way inside the restaurant. You were surprised that he didn’t take you to the AirBnB he rented out for you, himself and Mick. Though he didn’t bring Mick for the family dinner. Rio reasoned that he had other businesses to attend to while the two of you handled family business.

You two stopped at a table and your heart stopped.

At that moment, you wanted the ground to swallow you up. This was not fucking happening.

“Tio Felipe,” Rio greeted Felipe, momentarily letting go of your hand.

Your eyes landed on Angel, who tried his best to remain cool. 

“Angel, Ezekiel,” he nodded his head at the two Reyes men. “This is my fiancé, Y/N.”

Angel’s mouth dropped upon seeing you again, and his heart clenched when he saw the diamond ring on your left fourth finger.

This wasn’t possible.

Of all the women in the world.

You were Rio’s fiancé.

You felt your world shrink around you. Rio’s family in Santo Padre were the Reyes’.

Small fucking world.

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

A Woman Like You pt. 3 (Diane Sherman x socialphobist!reader)

as i promised, there is chapter 3 whoohoo

request: need another part to a woman like you 😌

warnings: social anxiety i guess

here is pt two: https://littlejeaniehugsbumblebees.tumblr.com/post/640358893165363200/a-woman-like-you-pt-2-diane-sherman-x-reader

google translate- :’)

To say Y / N hadn't socialized in college would have been a lie. There were 1 or 2 students with whom she got along well.

One of them was Wylan Montgomery.

Wylan was a tall, slender man with sandy hair. Y / N couldn't tell if she thought he was pretty with his pale skin, but what she did know was, that she didn't find him attractive. But she liked him. Wylan didn't speak much as he was also more of an introvert and lived in his own world. Often Y / N and Wylan studied together in the library, checked each other's homework or discussed books. Nothing special, actually, but there was one thing that Y / N really appreciated about her friendship with Wylan: the weekly chess game.

Y / N loved chess. It was a strategy game, that wasn't about communication with the opponent at all. A game, that could be played in complete silence and the only important thing was concentration.

Wylan and Y / N had a tradition of meeting in the library every Thursday afternoon to play chess together.

Their game could take hours and it was not uncommon for Wylan and Y / N to be the last in the library by the end of the evening.

And when Y / N and Wylan were sitting in the library in the back corner by the window on this rainy Thursday and had been playing for an hour, Y / N couldn't have imagined how this afternoon would end.

"Damn it," Wylan muttered quietly as he stared strained at the chess board. Y / N, who was just as focused as he was studying the board, lifted her eyes to meet the blond boy in the face.

His green eyes literally jumped over the board as he nervously chewed his lower lip, as he always did when they were playing.

It was Wylan's turn and he'd been sitting there for 3 minutes without having done anything. Just like Y / N, he considered every step he took, not just in chess, but in real life as well.

Y / N looked back at the chess board and let her eyes wander over the black wooden figures she was playing with today.

She heard Wylan exhale loudly as he reached out to put his white pawn on E4.

How predictable, thought Y / N. She leaned forward to take the time to consider her next move. Wylan was a good player, but transparent as he often used the same strategy and the game was also relatively early on.

"Mister Montgomery?" Suddenly called a female voice that made Y / N flinch. Both students immediately raised their heads to look at the woman, who owned the voice. Professor Sherman came running out from behind a bookcase.

"I've been looking for you for 20 minutes .. Your roommate told me you were probably here," she explained with relief when she recognized Wylan at the table.

"Professor Wright sent me, he's been waiting for you for an hour."

Y/N looked confused away from Diane, who was ignoring her, to look at Wylan's face. The blond man seemed just as confused as she was when suddenly his eyes widened and he let out a quiet "fuck".

"Do you know where he's waiting for me?" He asked, turning to Diane, who shrugged.

"His office, I assume."

"Uhm okay, thank you".

Wylan stood up and gave Y / N a pleading look.

"M'sorry," he muttered.

"It's okay," Y / N replied and looked back at the chess board.

"I also have a lot to do."

He smiled wryly before turning and jogging out of the library.

Y / N looked back at the chessboard and started packing up while trying to ignore the fact, that Diane was still relatively lost across the table.

"Do you really still have a lot to do?", The professor suddenly asked and Y / N immediately raised her head to look at her confused.

"Excuse me?"

"If you want, I'll play with you-"

With narrowed eyes, Y / N looked into Diane's face and watched the professor chew on her lower lip.

"Is that pity?" Y / N asked skeptically and Diane quickly shook her head.

"Oh no," she said. "It was just an idea."

"Well, I've already started cleaning up, I-"

"So far you have only taken the rook off the field, it was on B5", Diane interrupted her and looked at the rook in Y / N's hand.

"But the game has already started", Y / N tried to get rid of her professor. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't because Y / N didn't want to, on the contrary, she would have loved to play with her. But Diane was a stranger and to Y / N all strangers were her enemies.

In her mind she ran through all sorts of scenarios of how it would all work out.

Y / N's hand would probably tremble so much when placing the figures that she would knock over the other ones.

Maybe she was sneezing or something like that, maybe she would accidentally touch Diane. Maybe Diane was the kind of person, who talked a lot while playing and stared hard at Y / N while concentrating. On the other hand, chess was a game, that required a lot of concentration and nobody could blame Y / N if she kept silent while playing. And even though Y / N was afraid, that she might breathe too loudly, she knew, that she would regret it, if she would reject Diane.

"All right," Y / N finally uttered with a sigh and immediately regretted it. Damn it.

Diane smiled at Y / N's words before taking a seat across from Y / N at the table.

"Great," she muttered and Y / N put the black rook back on B5.

And then they started playing.

The next 3 hours were filled with a pleasant silence and concentration, for which Y / N was very grateful. So Diane wasn't the kind of person who talked a lot while playing. And that nobody spoke was not at all uncomfortable. Even so, Y / N tried to imagine that Wylan was sitting across from her and not her literature professor. But it was impossible; Diane's fingers were much slimmer than Wylan's. Then there was the cinnamon scent of her perfume, which replaced Wylan's aftershave, and at last there were the reddish-brown hair tips that slid onto the chessboard every time the professor leaned over to grab the figures.

Y / N didn't even look at the clock during the entire time and didn't even notice that the whole game lasted 3 hours. She hadn't noticed either, that it was already dark when she finally put Diane in check and she muttered:

"check

For the first time since they started playing, Y / N carefully raised her eyes to Diane to take in the expression on her face.

The woman frowned at the game board while her chin rested on her palm. Y / N noticed, that she was wearing the dark blue cardigan, as she often did in her seminars, and for whatever reason, Y / N liked this cardigan.

"Shit," said Diane finally, leaning back in her chair.

"You actually won."

"Well then, checkmate", Y / N muttered before reaching for her bishop to knock over the white king.

Meanwhile, the professor's brown eyes were still running over the field to analyze the entire game again.

"It's crazy," she finally said, leaning forward again to lean over the board.

"I've never met someone, who plays as subtly as you do."

Y / N lifted her gaze from the king to look straight into Diane's eyes.

Bad idea. Eye contact was disgusting and Y / N immediately blushed before glancing quickly at the lamp on the table.

"To be honest, I assumed you would win," she explained, staring into the bright light. Diane must have turned it on when it got dark.

"Why did you think, I would win?" Diane asked confused and Y / N could feel her gaze on her.

"I don't know," she replied and shrugged her shoulders.

"I played black-"

"Oh come on, you can't be serious"

"It was just a premonition, one of us had to win anyway and I just assumed you would be the one," Y / N tried desperately to justify herself before looking back at Diane, who was slightly confused and shook his head with a smile.

"You're weird," she muttered and Y / N felt a small sting in her chest. She hated it, when she was called that. As a social phobist, her greatest fear was, that people would perceive her that way. All she wanted was to be seen as normal, not as a weirdo.

For a few seconds she involuntarily lost herself in Diane's brown eyes and in these seconds her head was completely free of all anxious thoughts. To be honest, there was nothing left in her head. She could just stare. Diane finally cleared her throat and Y / N immediately averted her gaze in shame.

"I should go now, it's late and I have to go home," explained Diane as she got up.

"I have to go too," said Y / N quickly as she started clearing the board.

"Uhm, thank you, Miss Y / L / N," Diane said sincerely and smiled gently.

"It was great fun."

Y / N only nodded briefly and continued to collect the pieces from the board while listening to Professor Sherman's footsteps moving further and further away.

---------------------------------

It's like that with social phobia (at least for me): When I meet people and I'm very nervous in this situation qnd the meeting can be as relaxed as possible, but in the end only the things that stick in my memories is that, that were not perfect . Please don't get me wrong, shortly afterwards I am always very relieved, because all of my bad fears (like that I'm breathing too loudly) have not come true, but the more I think about this situation and how well everything went, I notice that it was still not perfect. There are little things that bother me: a confused look, a long moment of silence, the fear, of having laughed too loudly or the fact, that I accidentally touched the person I met while running.

I just want to do everything right and in no case overreact or do too much. And these little things that I mentioned above make me feel, that what I've done was too much and I decide to do less next time. Saying less, laughing less, just less.

And in the end, I really only have the things, that bothered me and after a while that's all I can remember.

That's why Y / N could only remember the moment, when Diane called her "weird". It was actually nothing, but Y / N feared nothing more, than the judgment of strangers and Diane's testimony hadn't really helped her, on the contrary, Y/N hated her literature professor now and had decided to skip the next seminar with the excuse, that she was sick.

And somehow she felt sick too. Y / N was of the opinion, that no one could understand her better than herself. She knew exactly what she had experienced. She knew, why she was the way she was and just the thought of talking to someone about it, made her tired. And when Diane called her weird, she realized again, that people can't help but judge. Advantages and clichés change our view of things so much and Y / N knows that, because she was not better.

To make matters worse, she had had to stare into her professor's eyes for a few seconds too long. Diane had to hate her, even though she'd said thank you for the game at the end. But as I said, over time that faded and the only thing that Y / N left of the afternoon was the moment, Diane called her weird and the brown color of her eyes, in which Y / N had lost itself a little too long.

Those were the things that were "too much".  And at night Y / N lay with her head buried in the pillow, repeating this mantra in her head, which she always said to herself, when she had spent the day outside of her comfort zone:

"I hate people. I hate people. I hate people."

Sometimes Y / N's comfort zone was only the radius of her bed and then she hated getting up early. There was also her annoying roommate Andrea, who often dragged strangers into her room during the day and Y / N hated people. However, Andrea was also one of those people, who preferred to spend their nights in strange beds rather than their own, which is why Y / N was often alone at night.

It was Monday afternoon and Y / N had been in bed all day reading some stupid book. Probably no one had noticed, that she was missing from Diane's seminar today, she was practically invisible.

And when there was a knock on the door that afternoon, Y / N assumed, that it was Andrea who had forgotten her key again.

Y / N was wearing leggings and sweather and still she felt naked when she climbed out of bed to open the door, which was because she wasn't made up. When she opened the door of her room and saw who was standing there, she wanted to slam the door again.

"P-professor Sherman," she stuttered awkwardly, staring into Diane's slightly smiling face.

"What are you doing here?"

"I, uh, I just wanted to see if everything is okay with you," replied Diane with crossed arms. Y / N frowned.

"Do you visit all of your students, who are sick to see if they are okay?"

"I uh- No".

Diane shook her head.

"May I come in?"

Y / N's eyes widened slightly.

"That's not a good idea," she said quickly.

"It'll only take a moment, so please."

Y / N took a second to think about it. She hated Diane, this woman had destroyed Y / N's comfort zone and didn't have to do much to get it. Y / N was so emotional and so vulnerable that a little "weird" was enough to make her insecure.

"Okay," she finally said, nodding before turning to let the woman in.

Now she noticed, how chaotic the whole room was and she was immediately ashamed when she pushed Andrea's shirt aside with her foot, before she sat on the edge of her bed. Diane had closed the door behind her and crossed the room to take the chair at Y / N's desk, which was next to the bed.

"So, how are you?" Asked Diane, sounding a little uninterested, if Y / N could tell.

"I'm okay."

Y / N shrugged.

"I'll be honest," Diane began, staring lost at the chess board, that was on Y /N's desk.

"When I found out today, that you called in sick, I was initially concerned, that it was because of our chess game."

Y / N's eyes narrowed. Damn it.

"Why should I call in sick about it? It was nothing," she lied and Diane nodded quickly.

"I know," she muttered, pensively lifting a black pawn off the board to turn it between her fingers.

"That was, to be honest, the best chess game I've ever played with anyone."

Y / N snorted and shook her head.

"Then it seems like, you've never played with good players, I'm actually really bad," she said with a wry smile.

"It doesn't really matter," muttered Diane.

"I was just afraid, you'd called in sick, because you might find it strange to play chess with me, as your professor."

"And you thought the situation would improve, if you just visit me, as your student, in my room?", Y / N replied confused and Diane just shrugged her shoulders.

"I guess- Uhm, it would be nice if you go now", Y / N explained and got up, because she wanted to go to the door to open it, but when she made the first step, Diane suddenly grabbed her wrist and Y / N immediately whirled around to face her. She stared into Diane's eyes, which looked up at her with concern.

"Are you depressed?" She asked quietly and Y / N decided to hate her even more. Diane found her weird at first and now depressed. Then there was her tight grip on Y / N's wrist, Y / N hated body contact.

"What the hell, no," she hissed and pulled her arm free from Diane's grip. With quick steps she ran to the door to open it again.

"I think you should really go now, I don't want anyone to see me in the dorm with you."

Diane stared at Y / N for a few seconds, before finally getting up and walking to the door as well.

"I'm sorry, that I bothered you," she muttered without looking at Y / N.

"Get well soon, Miss Y / L / N."

With that she stepped out of the room and Y / N immediately locked the door behind her when she felt tears sting her eyes.

I hate people.