#allsion hargreeves

[jason-please-see-a-psychiatrist]

umbrella academy characters as things me and my friends have said

luther: "piss! PISS!! am i funny yet?!"

diego: "yeah. SO NOT 'PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS!'"

allison: "i've got c-ptsd, i've got the bougie trauma!"

klaus: "what, i can't say balls in the balls server? what are you, ballphobic?"

five: "do i look like a teenage boy to you? don't answer that."

ben: "invest in egg whites...if you're into that..."

viktor: "my therapist divorced me."

lila: "another day, another bullet up my ass!"

reginald: "i don't give two poopoo shits."

grace: "stop uwu-ifying the national administration of space and aeronautics!"

[muse-of-fandoms]

 as much as we all make fun of the siblings for being the dysfunctional idiots they are, we just cant deny the fact that they got game. 

Luther somehow gets married within what is possibly a week to one of their enemies when their first meeting was literally them breaking into their own home

Diego ends up in a mental hospital but gets a hot, british assassin and gets her to almost go against her controlling mother who was the head of a fucking interdimensional hitman network

Allison gets a guy who is progressive and supportive of her in a time of rampant misogyny and doesnt question the fact that his wife has superpowers

Klaus and Dave fall in love in a war and Dave loves klaus despite being raised in a time where homosexuality was considered a mental illness.

And even Viktor’s time with Sissy is so impactful and precious that they literally lived the dream of living in a farm with their son and no one to bother them except sissy’s husband but he was dick 

the only siblings who arent so involved in romance is Five I-have-been-married-to-my-wife-for-40-years and Ben im-fucking-dead 

[nooneaskedbut]

I’m very mad at Luther. Like, five literally saved your dumb monkey ass from an apocalypse YOU WERE ULTIMATELY RESPONSIBLE FOR and you got MAD because he didn’t do it perfectly? He has literally told you, verbatim, “time travel is a crapshoot.�� I don’t hate you, but what a DICK MOVE.

[tora-the-cat]

Ok. I waited 2 years before checking the Eaymond Chestnut & Five character tag on Ao3. I was very patient. So can someone explain why no one else has written the 'Hazel sends five a couple months back instead of a couple DAYS back and five goes to live with Allison but has to pretend to be her little brother because she is NORMAL that you very much and we get amazing five+allison+ray meal interactions and five's general existsnce only furthers Allison's friend's secret theory that she escaped a cult and he will NOT go to school but he does keep dragging weirder and weirder Other Guys (brothers?) to the Chestnut household and what if he gets there just before the wedding because he would cry like an old sap if he got to go to Allison's wedding and he keeps writing math on the walls and just WON'T stop and Ray has watched Allison try to explain that stealing is bad even if you don't get caught and this ALSO perpetuates the cult theory and Ray tries to hire a sitter for the kid when Allison ans him have a meeting at oddessa's to attend but five just laughs at him and he looks at Allison for help but she is ALSO laughing and-

[tua-hottakes]

Oblivion: Luther fucks Allison into Oblivion while everyone else saves the world again

Sorry but this ones too obvious? Like put some more thought into it pls..

Altho u should be disqualified from this game all together cuz uve got the scripts already.🤫

[malecacidd]

Every single one of the Hargreeves siblings would look good in a dress and I'm deeply offended by this fact.

[moodyxbitch]

allison hargreeves moodboard 💍

[thevanyahargreeves]

also something of note is five (highly skilled time traveling assassin) shot vanya (a violinist) to not kill but to have her lose all motor skills

...and have her now rely on a group of ppl who for the most part dont really care about her to now survive...i mean one would argue thats a fate worst than death

[nightskyfangirl]

I Heard a Rumor Everything was Okay - Chapter Two (Klaus)

Characters: Allison Hargreeves (Main), Klaus Hargreeves, Reginald Hargreeves, Rest of the Hargreeves Siblings (Mentioned)

Summary: A collection of time Allison helped her siblings with her Rumors

Warnings: None in this chapter. Everything is canon-typical

This also on AO3 by the same name, but because Tumblr doesn’t like links, I’ll post it in the reblogs lol

DO NOT REPOST.

_______

Klaus’s head pounded as he walked through the mansion. The screams of the dead still echoed in his ears and he resisted the urge to cover his them. They weren’t there. Not anymore. Only in his head. Klaus could hear his mother’s humming from somewhere in the house and he chose to focus on it instead. He’d never been as close to her as Diego, but the small noise still helped calm him a bit. His fingers were freezing. He flexed them to try and get the blood flowing, but it didn’t help much. The Mausoleum held the type of cold that wouldn’t leave his bones for hours even after he left. Klaus took careful steps up the stairs. Normally he’d run up two stairs at a time, but not tonight. He wasn’t in the mood to run into Luther who’d tell him he shouldn’t be up or Ben who’d worry over him worse than their mother. Klaus ran a hand over his face, and it came away wet. Klaus frowned. “Klaus?” Klaus sighed. Couldn’t the universe just grant him one wish, or did it really hate him this much? He forced a smile onto his face and threw his arms out. “Allison!”

She was blurry when he looked at her and…oh. His eyes were watery. He quickly looked away. He heard footsteps. Great. She was going to get Luther. Klaus considered just running but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. He looked up and met Allison’s eyes. Oh. She wasn’t going to get Luther. She’d just been coming closer. “Are you alright?” She asked. Klaus laughed but it sounded off even to his ears. “Yeah, I’m fine!” Five had once told him that according to studies that was the most common lie. The words ‘I’m fine.’ But that was before Five ran out the door and never came back. “Klaus…” Allison started, then stopped. “Come with me.” Klaus looked up as she walked away. She glanced back at him after she reached the top of the stairs. She waved him after her. He hesitated for a second then followed her into her room. With a small gesture, she asked him to sit. He almost smiled. It was that pink chair. He liked it mostly because it was so bright it gave him a headache just looking at it. He sat down and rested his elbows on his knees and focused his gaze on his hands. They were still pale from the cold. She held something out to him. He glanced at it. A small blanket. Klaus took it and wrapped it around himself. He vaguely registered her sitting down across from him. His ears were still ringing from the dead. He didn’t understand how they could be so loud. They screamed constantly. Not words, just screaming. Noise. His nails bit into his palms. “Klaus?” Allison said, pulling him from his thoughts. He looked up and met her eyes for the second time that night. “What happened?” She asked. He hesitated. Why did she care? She wouldn’t get it anyway. He’d told his siblings about the dead before and the way they wouldn’t shut up. They hadn’t listened then, why would she listen now? He considered a lot of dumb jokes to reply with but he brushed them off. Klaus chose to just shake his head. She sighed. “Do you want me to go get Ben?” She said. Klaus gave her a look. He wasn’t a kid. He didn’t want anyone. He didn’t even need anyone. All he wanted was to get back to his room and find something, anything to turn off the wailing of the dead. Ben couldn’t do that. None of them could. “Look,” Allison said, “I know you don’t really like me, but Ben is cool, right?” Klaus frowned. He didn’t have anything against Allison. Yeah, she was selfish but that wasn’t really something he could throw at her. He wasn’t getting an award for his kindness anytime soon. And yeah, okay so he spent a lot of time with Ben. That was because he was the only one who wanted to hang around Klaus. “I don’t want Ben,” Klaus muttered. “Then talk to me. What happened?” Klaus sighed. He wasn’t getting out of this. And if he didn’t answer her soon, how long until she chose to just rumor him into answering? He rubbed his face again. “It was just training, Allison.” She raised an eyebrow. “At two in the morning? I haven’t seen you since dinner.” Of course, she didn’t believe him. No one ever believed him. “Yeah. I was training.” “Klaus. You’re freezing, you were crying when I found you and you look like hell. What happ—” “I was in the Mausoleum, okay?!” He gritted his teeth and looked back at the floor, burying his face in his hands. “I’m scared of the ghosts. Dad wants me to get over it, so he’s been locking me in the mausoleum.” Klaus didn’t know what he expected. Her to laugh at him fearing ghosts? Be angry at him for waking her up over something so small? Yeah, he hadn’t meant to wake her up, but that wouldn’t matter, would it? But he hadn’t expected her to freeze. To watch him with…why were her eyes watery? She blinked and the look was gone so fast he wondered if he imagined it. “I’m so sorry,” she muttered. “We should have known something like this… We should have tried to find you—” “Allison, I’m fine.” “No, you’re not!” She bit her lip. “I’ll take care of this.” She stood. “What? No, no, I’m fine, Allison. Please don’t do anything—” “It’s fine, Klaus. I’ll be right back." She paused and gave him a look. "Give me just a second, okay? Stay here.” Allison disappeared out of the room before Klaus could stop her. Allison didn’t know what she was going to do. She marched through the house with a simple goal in mind. Finding Reginald and making sure Klaus stayed safe. She found him in his office, as per usual. He was writing away in one of his diaries and occasionally sent a glance over to the monitors that were stacked on his desk. She absently recognized the sleeping figures of Luther, Diego, Ben, and Vanya on the small monotoned screens. Her bed and Klaus’s were empty. Allison took another step and the floor creaked. Reginald looked up. “Number Three? What are doing—” “I heard a rumor you never hurt Klaus again and you never forced him back to the mausoleum.” Reginald’s eyes turned silver. She didn’t bother with any of the theatrics she used on robbers and criminals. She just looked him in the eye and tried to keep her voice from shaking as she spoke. The slight tremor in her voice wasn’t from fear, though, it was anger. She started to walk out but stopped. She spoke over her shoulder, “I heard a rumor you forgot I was here.” She ran back upstairs. It would work. Her rumors always worked. Klaus was safe. Klaus jumped as she opened the door and quickly shut it behind her. He looked up at her and bit his lip. "You won't ever have to go back to the mausoleum, Klaus," Allison said. Klaus opened his mouth as if to say something, but closed it again. After a moment he muttered a small, "thank you." She nodded. She sat down across from him and tilted her head. She could see the gears turning in his head. "What?" She asked. He hesitated. "Could you...could you Rumor me?" Allsion frowned. Her siblings hated it when she Rumored them. "Why? What do you want me to say?" "Could you...Allison will you make it so I don't hear them? Just for tonight?" Allison tried to keep from looking startled. No only did she want her to Rumor him but she wanted her to turn off his powers? She hesitated. "You sure?" "Yes." Allison nodded. She didn't like the idea of messing with his powers but she hated the look in his eyes more. Besides, she'd used her powers in the past to mess up Diego's aim when he threw stuff at her and she'd used it on Five to keep him from jumping away during an argument. If she could do it then, she couldn't say no now. "I heard a rumor you didn't hear the ghosts until you wake up tomorrow." Klaus shut his eyes before the silver even faded and seemed to relax. "Thank you." Allison didn't know how to reply, so she just smiled. “Want me to do your nails?”

[tickle-fic-chick]

Luther Hargreeves || Tickle Headcanons

Lee:

My problematic son used to be super ticklish.

After his transformation he was a lot less sensitive.

Still has spots that get him all giggly.

Was occasionally ganged up on while growing up.

Allision tickles him the most.

Can handle teasing fairly well.

Tries not to struggle, scared that he will hurt someone.

Sometimes seeks revenge, sometimes doesn’t.

His worst spots are his neck, palms, and hips.

Ler:

Tends to lean more towards the ler role.

Claims tickling is childish but loves wrecking his siblings.

Tickles Diego when he is trying to act edgy or stubborn.

His favorite lee is Allsion, though.

Only comfortable with teasing Allision.

Tickles tend to be a little on the rougher side.

Pins his lees down very easily.

Merciful towards everyone but Diego, to the other’s dismay.

Doesn’t see the revenge coming until it is too late.

[fiive-hargreeves]

how could i not? - f.h.

warnings: cursing, mentions of knives in the first paragraph, a bit of ooc five at the end? idrk what else

word count: 2.3k

pairing: (16yo!) (dumbass!)five hargreeves × (16yo!) (fem!)reader

summary: y/n can't keep her feelings bottled up anymore, but she can't tell anyone either. she finds a creative way to let five know how she feels

a/n: i like this a lot, but also the ooc five at the end is bothering me just a little

y/n/n = your nickname

----------------------

Y/n giggled, leaving yet another note for Five. This one was in Italian, yet another language she knew the boy did not know. Five was a smart person, and he loved to read books, but he had never really indulged in the world of linguistics, let alone try to learn a whole other language.

It was not long after the two had met - a day, three years prior, that had involved knives, black coffee, threats, and the slightest useage of telekinesis - that they had become the best of friends; however, after some time, y/n began to harbour feelings of something more. Feelings - she decided - that were best kept secret, for the sake of hers and Five's friendship.

In spite of this decision, y/n sometimes felt that if she didn't say anything to anyone, she might just burst. So she devised a plan.

The young girl knew that her friend wasn't particularly aware of any language besides English. She also knew that while he was one of the most brilliant people she'd ever met - and quite possibly a genius - in some instances he failed to display even a sliver of common knowledge. She hoped this would be the case in her situation as well. The plan - as she decided - was to send Five numerous notes throughout the day, every day (for a certain amount of time). Notes that would contain secret messages - messages written in various languages, all of which Five - hopefully - did not know. The message? It would be the same on each note - 'i love you.'

She'd started off with French; a simple 'je taime' scribbled on a sticky note (in disguised handwriting, of course). She was - as anyone would be in her situation - deathly afraid, and feeling as though she may regurgitate her mother's potato salad. She quickly slid the note underneath Five's door, before walking away as fast as she could without looking too suspicious.

She continued the day - excited, but nervous. As she sat in one of the Hargreeves Mansion's many common areas, accompanied by Allison and Diego, her results came to light.

A faint "what the..." could be heard from just down the hall. Allison and Diego exchanged looks, but y/n knew what it was. A second later, Five appeared in the doorway holding up y/n's folded note.

"Do any of you know what jee... tay may is?" he asked, squinting at the note.

Y/n supressed the rising giggle in her throat. "Maybe-" she coughed. "maybe it's a secret message,"

"Who's sending me secret messages?" Five questioned. "Is this even English?" he observed the note again, more carefully this time.

The longer he gazed at it, the harder and faster y/n felt her heart beating in her chest; it pounded at her chest with such chutzpah that one might assume it was trying to escape her body.

"I don't know," said Five, finally, folding the note back up and placing it in his pocket. Y/n allowed a small sigh of relief to escape her body as Five teleported away.

"Weird" remarked Allison. "What do you think 'jee tay may' is?"

Y/n turned to face her. "Honest?" Allsion nodded. "I think he was reading it wrong,"

The next day, with a bit more confidence than the last, y/n sent another. This one, the girl decided, would be written in Welsh. She - in her disguised hand - wrote out 'rwy'n dy garu di', and slipped the note under Five's door as she had done the day before.

This time, however, y/n hadn't been there for Five's reaction. He had - as his victim would later relate it - stormed into Klaus's room, and screamed "What does this even say? Do you know what this says?" Shoving the note into Klaus's face to read.

Y/n continued this for weeks; each language was more complicated than the last. She even once branched out to Arabic, which sent Five into a flying rage that was quite hilarious to watch.

Back in present-day, y/n had decided to tone it down once more a few days ago, starting up again with Swahili. Today's language, however, was Italian. She quietly slid the note under Five's bedroom door, and relocated as fast as she could.

She found herself in a hallway, staring back at the one Hargreeves child she had been hoping not to run into.

"Hey, y/n/n," he grinned. "I was looking for you, actually,"

"Really?"

"Yeah," he answered. "I wanted you to help me figure out who the hell keeps sending all these notes,"

In the moment, y/n's heart dropped. How was she supposed to conduct an investigation on a crime that she was guilty for?

"Will you?" Five asked hopefully.

"Sure!" y/n said quickly, regretting it immediately. "Maybe, " she thought, in an attempt to make herself feel better, "I could prevent Five from figuring out that it's me. Yes, yes! I'll follow thousands of red herrings - anything that will lead the blame away from me!"

"Great!" he beamed at her, before striding away.

Y/n smiled to herself, and began to make her way down to the kitchen, in search of something to snack on.

Upon arrival, she found Vanya tearing open a box of Pop-Tarts. She looked up. "Hi,"

"Hey Vanya," Y/n replied. "Pass me one, will you?" Vanya handed her one of the packs of Pop-Tarts. As the girls started in on their mid-day snacks, somewhere else in the house, a very exasperated boy found a note.

"whY," Five groaned from his position in the doorway of his bedroom. "Tye Aye-moe! What the hell is tye aye-moe?"

"Why don't you just put it in google translate?" said Allison, coming out of her own room to answer her brother.

"That-" Five thought for a moment. "That could work,"

Allison rolled her eyes and watched as Five pulled out his phone - a gift for his fourteenth/fifty-ninth birthday - and typed the words in. "It says.. it says it means 'I love you',"

Allison made a face, taking the note from Five's hand. "This says ti amo, dumbass! I love you in Italian,"

"Call me that again and you'll be holding your tongue," he hissed, snatching the note back. "How do you even know that?"

"I rumored myself into being able to speak every language on Earth," she answered, ignoring her brother's threat.

"You can do that?"

She shrugged in reply. "I guess," she looked around. "Do you have any of the other notes? So we can see what those say,"

Five led his sister into his room, where he pointed towards a large pile of folded sticky notes.

Allison picked one up, and typed it into her phone. "This says the same thing,"

"So does this one," said Five, throwing down the note he'd been holding.

"But who loves you?" Allison wondered aloud.

He stared at the notes as she spoke. "As far as I know? Not a single soul,"

"Hey!" Allison said, nudging him on the shoulder. "We all love you! Just, not enough to leave secret notes in different languages,"

Five shrugged, walking towards the door with Allsion. "I'll figure it out tomorrow," he said, before heading to the kitchen.

Later that night, while everyone else was peacefully sleeping, he lay awake in his bed, staring at the ceiling. His mind was swimming with thoughts - "who was the note-leaver?" being the most prominent of them all.

Suddenly, Five came up with an idea. He would teleport into the surveillance room and watch the camera footage of the last couple of hours. Surely, Five thought, this would answer the question he had been asking for the last month-and-half - who was leaving these mysterious notes?

He locked his bedroom door, and teleported immediately. Before long, he was in the surveillance room watching the hallway tapes on fast-forward. He slowed it down to regular speed once he saw himself leaving his room. Not soon after this, y/n came along on the screen.

Five didn't think much of her, until he saw her bend down and slide a note under his door. He stopped the video, unsure what to think. Y/n? His best friend? She... she loved him?

He teleported back into his bedroom, but there was still no way he was getting to sleep. He'd known y/n since they were thirteen - almost three years now. She knew everything about him; his awful alcohol addiction, his snarky attitude, his bloodied past. How... how could she love him?

Did he love her? He stared into the ceiling once more, contemplating this. Of course he loved her. She was the only person he'd ever met who seemed to be just as competent (if not more, at times) as him. She was scary too - she was 100% the most badass of the people he knew. And god, was she pretty - oh, her smile was one of the only things that made him genuinely happy.

How would he tell her he knew? When he did tell her, would she deny it? Would she say it was meant as a joke? And if she didn't... would he be able to tell her how he felt? Or would he chicken out like so many times in the past?

He'd never been good at expressing his feelings; it wasn't his fault, either! Even before the apocalypse, the only real contact he'd had with people was firing insults at criminals and arguing with his siblings. And what if he, by some miracle, worked up the courage to talk about his emotions for more than 0.02 seconds? What would he say?

He needed advice, he decided - but from who? No one in his family was functional enough to know anything about love... were they? Maybe he'd ask Vanya... or Allison. His brothers seemed a bit... clueless. At least, when it came to the topic of girls.

So that was it - he had made up his mind. As soon as Allison or Vanya awoke (whichever came first), he would tell them his dilemma.

The boy spent the rest of the night staring at the wall, trying to tell himself that everything would be alright.

The first person awake was Luther, as usual. Then came Allison.

When the boy's sister awoke from her slumber he was at her bedside, his body draped over one of her obnoxiously pink chairs. When she saw him, she yelped, but refrained from attacking upon the realization that it was only Five.

"What-" she yawned, putting down the magazine she had snatched up in defense. "what are you doing in my room?"

"I have a problem," said Five, brushing off her question. "I was hoping you could help me?"

"What is it?" Allison asked, sitting up in her bed. "If you need to kill someone, I'm not-"

"It's y/n," said Five, cutting her off. "Last night I couldn't sleep, so I checked the camera footage. Y/n's been putting the notes under my door, Allison. She... she...she-"

"She loves you," his sister finished for him. "She loves you! Do you... you know...?"

"Reciprocate her feelings?" Allison nodded excitedly. "Of course," he said dismissively, though he could feel himself blush.

"OoooOoh you two are going to be the cutest couple!"

"Well I need to tell her first," said Five. "I need to tell her that I know she was sending the notes, I need to tell her I know what they say, and I need to tell her that I like her back,"

Allison's eyes lit up. "I know. What you. Should do."

"Wha-"

"Alright!" She said excitedly, clasping her hands together. She was seemingly unaware that she'd just cut her brother off. "So. You teleport from here back into your room. When y/n comes over say you're going to the store or something, and leave really quickly. Once you're far away enough from the house, teleport back into your room. When y/n slides the note under it, open the door and pick it up. And you pick up the note go 'so you're the infamous note writer,' then open it and be like 'hey doesn't this say 'I love you'?'"

"I... uh-"

"It'll be great!" Allison assured her brother. "I know you may not believe me, Five, but you're a wonderful brother, and an even better friend,"

Five would never admit it, but at that moment, he was fighting off tears.

"Th-thanks," he said, giving his sister an awkward hug.

After this rare moment of Hargreeves-sibling-affection, he teleported downstairs, awaiting y/n's arrival.

Once y/n showed up, he followed Allison's plan exactly. He pushed past her at the door muttering something about going to the store.

He tried following the direction he would take if he were actually going to the store, but that was the path he'd taken when running away from home, and he preferred not to walk that way.

Instead, he turned left, continuing for about 30 seconds before teleporting back into his room.

Soon after he'd arrived in his bedroom, a folded sticky-note slid under his door. He scrambled towards the door.

As he opened it, he saw y/n walking away. "So... uh," he cleared his throat. "you've been leaving the notes."

At this, y/n blushed severely. She wished she could bury herself deep in the Earth and never have to come out.

"What language is it today?" Five continued with Allison's script, though his mouth was growing dry and his hands were shaking.

He opened the note. It took him a moment to remember how to read; he'd been preparing his mind for some foreign language. This, as he understood it, was English.

'I love you, Five' the note read. 'Y/n'

He looked up at her. She, while he had been reading the note, had grown more and more upset. She now looked as though she was going to cry, or maybe as if she had been crying for some time.

"Hey," Five said quietly. "hey, hey, don't cry," he extended his arms and pulled his friend into a hug. "You wanna know something wild, y/n/n?"

Y/n's response was a muffled mumble, but he took it for a yes. "I love you too,"

She moved her arms up and tightened them around him. "Really?" she sniffled.

He pulled away from her, smiling. He wiped underneath her eye with his thumb. "Of course I do, y/n/n," he placed a light kiss on her forehead. "How could I not?"

[dauntless-gothamite]

More Than Just a Rumor

fandom: The Umbrella Academy

pairing: Diego Hargreeves x reader

requested by anon: OK so I have this TUA request and it's a little all over the place but bear with me! (diego x reader, au where they stop the apocalypse btw) So the reader has become a close friend with the Hargreeves and Diego is smitten. Now Allison knows about this and, against Diego's wishes rumors the reader into falling in love with him. However, the reader just looks at her like "did you just try to rumor me?!" because it turns out that did not work on the reader since she was already in love with Diego!

warnings: none

word count: 1.8k+

A/N: here it is; I hope you like it! Also, I tried to write this with gender neutral pronouns, so if anyone sees a mistake, please let me know so I can fix it!

You heard the unmistakable sound of something shatter as it hit the wall or the floor upstairs, followed by a sudden stop in the violin music coming from Vanya’s room. “Klaus!” someone yelled, and the next minute, the eccentric, curly-haired boy came running down the stairs, making a beeline for the door.

“Oh, hey, Y/N!” he yelled as he swept past you and out the door. You looked around in confusion for a moment before taking a seat on the couch, not even bothering to understand whatever Klaus was doing. These kinds of things happened so frequently in the Hargreeves household that you had long since given up trying to understand the chaos--it was better to just accept it. You leaned back comfortably, and a small smile appeared on you face as you thought about how you’d managed to get tangled up in the complex, messy lives of the Hargreeves siblings.

Two Weeks Ago

You walked briskly down the sidewalk--you had to get to work on time--when a young boy just appeared a few feet in front of you. You let out a tiny shriek before clapping a hand over your mouth to silence yourself. After a few deep breaths, you let your body relax. You looked to the spot where the boy had been standing, but somehow, it was empty. In fact, the boy was nowhere to be seen. You sighed and continued walking, trying to shake the weird incident from your mind before you got to work. Rounding the corner, you were surprised to find the boy standing with a small group of people who looked about twice his age and speaking with them, as if he knew them. Perhaps he did, you thought, but that does not change the fact that you just saw that boy do . . . what exactly did he do? As important as work was, your curiosity got the best of you, and you approached the group. They were speaking in hushed tones, clearly focused on whatever they were discussing.

Much to your annoyance, it soon became clear that waiting for them to notice you standing a short distance away and glaring in their general direction was not going to get their attention. Resisting the urge to roll your eyes, you cleared your throat loudly, and they all stopped talking, turning to look at you. They looked around at each other, unsure what to do; it wasn’t often the group was approached by strangers. After a moment of silence, one of them--a male with tanned skin; short, dark hair; and deep, brown eyes--stepped forward.

“Can we help you?” he asked hesitantly, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

“Yeah,” you replied, crossing your arms. “You can explain why that boy,” you gave a pointed look to the seemingly youngest member of the group, just appeared in front of me on the sidewalk, causing me to nearly drop my coffee!”

“But you didn’t,” the small boy interjected, and the man you had been talking to before turned to scowl at him.

“Not now, Five,” he said, frustrated.

“Five?” you asked curiously.

“That’s my name,” the kid stated factually. After a pause, he continued. “To answer your question, I ‘appeared,’ as you so eloquently put it, because I have the ability to jump through space and time.” Your eyebrows shot up in surprise; that was not even close to what you were expecting to hear. Not that you knew what to expect, you just didn’t think it would be, well, that.

“How is that even--” you began, only to be cut off by the kid, who you now knew was named Five.

“You wouldn’t understand,” he said, unbothered by what you thought.

“Oh, um… okay,” you replied awkwardly, your mind spinning. “I’m Y/N,” you said awkwardly, unsure what to do next.

“Nice to meet you, Y/N. I’m Diego,” said the man you’d spoken to first.

Present Day

The memory brought a smile to your lips; since that moment, your life had been different. You were pulled into the world of supernatural abilities blood-pumping adventures, and narrow escapes, all of which played a part in preventing the would-be apocalypse. It had been two weeks since you met the Hargreeves, and in that time, you had become friends with the whole family. You even met their adoptive mother, who was a robot, named Grace and their butler, who happened to me a monkey--more specifically, a chimpanzee--named Pogo. As much as you loved spending time with all of them, there was one person who you had become particularly close with: Diego.

You’d always thought he was handsome, but that wasn’t what made him different to you. The more time you two spent together, the more you learned about him, and, at some point, you realized your feelings for Diego weren’t strictly platonic. While watching something on the television with any of the Hargreeves was enjoyable, you found your mind drifting to Diego, wondering what it would be like if he was sitting next to you, arm around your shoulder. Whenever he told a joke, you found yourself laughing, even if the joke wasn’t what one would consider traditionally funny, and you secretly hoped he would laugh at all your jokes in turn. One time, Diego had lent his sweatshirt to you, and it took everything in you to return it rather than stash it in your closet and keep it for yourself.

Vanya and Allsion had been the ones to figure out that something was going on, so when they had suggested a fun night out, just the three of you, you agreed. What you didn’t realize was that the other two were taking you out in order to figure out what was going on. All three of you were having a good time, when the discussion shifted to a topic you weren’t keen on discussing: crushes. As the sisters talked, you sat quietly and listened, wishing you could fade into the wall behind you. However, your silence was quickly noticed, and Allison turned to you, a smirk on her face and a mischievous glint in her eye.

“So, Y/N. What about you?” she asked innocently.

“Oh, I’m not really interested in anyone right now,” you said. You blushed, and Vanya and Allison knew it was a lie.

“Come on! We won’t tell anyone,” Vanya said, attempting to coax it out of you.

The conversation continued to be like that for a while, and after a few hours, you began to feel tired. In your sleepy mind, your impulse control was not nearly as good as you thought it was, and on the drive back to the Hargreeves’ house, you ended up telling the girls you fancied Diego. They feigned surprise, and if you hadn’t been so out of it, you would have seen the signs indicating that they were about to get involved. Unfortunately, you missed the signs, and when they took you home, you went to sleep without a second thought about what revealing your crush on Diego to his sisters might mean for you.

The next morning, you entered the living room of the Hargreeves’ large house, and Allison was sitting on the sofa, waiting for you.

“Y/N, come over here!” she said, barely suppressing a smile. You walked over and looked at her curiously as you sat down beside her.

“Hey, Allison. Wh--” you began, only for her to interrupt you.

“I heard a rumor,” she began, leaning in close, “that you were in love with Diego,” she finished. Allison had known about your crush, but she also knew Diego was absolutely taken with you, and, despite his wishes, she decided to take matters into her own hands and make your feelings just as strong as Diego’s. What she hadn’t realized was that they already were.

“Did you just try to rumor me?” you asked after she pulled away, a slight frown on your face. Allison’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, ad her mouth opened in shock. Just as she was about to speak, Diego walked in.

“Good morning,” he said as he strolled in. Both you and Allison remained silent and blushed, unsure what to do. A moment later, just as he was about to leave the house, Allison nudged your shoulder.

“You have to tell him!” she whisper-yelled. You paled and looked over your shoulder at Diego, then back at Allison.

“No way!” you replied, frantic. Allison shrugged and rolled her eyes before calling out to Diego.

“Hey, Diego,” she said, causing him to turn around.

“What?” he huffed, turning around.

“Y/N has something to say to you,” she smirked.

You turned to her in shock and whispered “traitor.”

“Okay,” Diego said expectantly, crossing his arms and taking a few steps in your direction.

“Well, actually, I just wanted to say…” you trailed off, trying to find the right words. He arched an eyebrow impatiently, and you began to fidget with your hands. “I just wanted to say that I really like you. Like, a lot,” you said, staring at your lap.

Diego looked surprised, and he quickly turned to Allison. “Did you rumor Y/N?” he asked, his voice laced with concern. “I told you not to!”

“She didn’t,” you replied before Allison could. “Well, she kind of did, but it didn’t work, so she didn’t really do it,” you explained. Digo looked to you for an explanation. “Last night, we were hanging out, and I might have let it slip that I like you,” you said, blushing furiously. “So this morning, Allison tried to make me fall in love with you by using her special ability, but it didn’t work.”

“What do you mean by ‘it didn’t work?’” Diego asked. “That’s unheard of.”

“I know,” you replied. “But the reason it didn’t work was because I was already in love with you.”

The room was silent, and you glanced up at Diego to gauge his reaction. He was frozen in shock, and you worried that meant he didn’t feel the same way. “I’ll just go, I know you don’t feel the same way,” you said, holding in tears, as you got up from your seat and headed towards the door.

“Wait,” he said, catching your arm. “Actually, I do. Feel the same way, that is. I just didn’t think you liked me,” he said softly. He looked more open and vulnerable in that moment than you had ever seen him look, and you smiled at him weakly, still processing. He smiled back and said “are you free tonight?”

“Yeah,” you nodded.

“Great. Is seven o’clock a good time for you?” he asked, and you nodded again, smiling more confidently now. “Ok then, I will pick you up at your apartment at half past six.”

“It’s a date,” you said, grinning as he walked out the door.

[nooneaskedbut]

I literally couldn’t stand to order the Hargreeves because I love them all so here’s tiers instead:

A+ tier: Five, Klaus, Ben

A tier: Diego, Allison, Vanya

A- tier: Luther

[hobbitinthetardis]

happy TUA reality headcanons: HARGREEVES SIBLINGS AND CLAIRE (this is post canon so BEWARE: SPOILERS)

@sad-ness-mad-ness  and I just want them to be happy okay???

Hargreeves siblings go back in time to help Vanya

“Hah don’t listen to Reggie we love you :)”

Allison fixing up things with Patrick and getting partial custody of Claire

Auntie Vanya. So soft.

Playing her violin to Claire to help her get to sleep

Vanya reading Claire bedtime stories

VANYA TEACHING CLAIRE TO PLAY THE VIOLIN

Allison walks in on Diego trying to teach Claire how to properly hold a knife.

“Diego nO“

“I was just teaching her how to defend herself!”

Everyone thinks Klaus is going to be a bad influence

But when he finally meets Claire he sits her down and tells her a bunch of stories from Vietnam (leaving out the more morbid details) that none of the siblings had heard before

Then everyone sits down for story time with Klaus and Klaus is finally included and able to open up

Klaus conjuring Ben (because he’s sober now guys) and Claire going all star eyed at her glowy blue uncle

“Is uncle Ben here now?”

“Yeah wanna see him?”

Ben being so soft with Claire

Reading his favourite books to her

Telling Claire stories of how stupid his siblings were/are

Her uncle five looks only a few years older than her but then he sits her down, looks her straight in the eye, and says:

“I’m 58 motherfucker”

“FIVE LANGUAGE AROUND MY DAUGHTER”

“Can I have one of your brownies uncle Klaus?”

“Sure sweethe-”

“nO”

“Aw come on Allison! I’m sober now!”

Allsion being so protective of her daughter.

“GUYS SHE’S MY DAUGHTER NOT YOURS”

Luther actually being a decent guy and apologising to Vanya

Luther meeting Claire for the first time and Claire pretty much fangirls and asks if all the stories her mum told her were true

FEEL FREE TO ADD ON

[cfdxspair]

“I won’t let you bleed out!” // Allison

Allison’s hands shook by her side as eyes stared up at the ceiling. Had Vanya not completely destroyed her vocal chords, she might have used what little breath she had left to rumor Margot and her other siblings away. They all had had to watch one sibling die, she didn’t want to force them to watch another. Unfortunately she was left powerless and even while she lay on the ground dying, she couldn’t find it in herself to entirely blame Vanya. Especially after what she had done. Allison moved her hand around until she found Margot’s and rested her palm on top of it.

@mindmyth

[nooneaskedbut]

Guys

GUYS

The magic second bullet that goes all over the place

Diego Swerved It