#all i want is so be a cryptid but also kinda cute

[ultramarinaa]

Here, you can have some Moth Jon and Lonely Martin for your birthday ^^

LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOO IT'S THEEEEEM!!

AND THEY ARE HAPPY!!!

The heart eyes get me so much, those absolute DORKS

THANK YOUUUUU BIRTHDAY JMART IS BEST JMART

[wynnyfryd]

@messessentialist told me her friend called to rant about spotting an “upsettingly beautiful boy in a tj maxx” and i vomited 1200 words about it, enjoy

—

fic idea: chrissy and eddie work together at tj maxx. one afternoon a guy comes in who’s so hot that it kinda just pisses eddie off? bc like, who does this gorgeous asshole think he is??? coming in here and popping his hip at eddie’s counter, like, does he even know how uncomfortable it is to start chubbin’ up in skinny jeans?? that shit chafes!

so eddie gets all flustered and responds by getting an attitude with the guy because he has zero chill (and also because the dude’s iced coffee is sweating a ring all over eddie’s counter, and so help him if his manager gets on his ass one more time about keeping his station tidy—)

“did you need help finding anything else today?” eddie sneers. “coasters, perhaps?”

upsettingly hot guy looks confused for a second before he follows eddie’s pointed glance at the plastic starbucks cup leaving a cold puddle on the laminate, and then he sneers right back; adjusts the ray bans nestled in his perfect honey brown hair and looks eddie up and down — long, slow, one eyebrow lifting in subtle elitist disapproval.

“what?” he snorts, “hot topic wasn’t hiring?”

oh, fuck you very much!

so eddie’s all ‘nemesis acquired’ and holds the biggest grudge of all time. makes a sworn enemy and a boogeyman out of the guy, turns him into urban legend, starts blaming the Upsettingly Beautiful Man for every little thing that goes wrong in his life — at work, at home, at band practice; no place is safe from the dreaded UBM.

“he’s not a fucking cryptid!” gareth snaps one day at rehearsal, chucking a drumstick at eddie’s head. “just track him down and bone already so you can shut the hell up!”

“wouldn’t he just talk about him more after they have sex?” jeff wonders, to which gareth narrows his eyes and raises his second drumstick as a threat.

meanwhile, eddie’s cute coworker chrissy (who he’s become surprisingly good friends with, to the point of referring to her as his work wife) gets a girlfriend. robin’s sooooo pretty, and soooo nice, and sooooo tall, eddie, did you know how tall she is?

yes, chrissy, he’s supremely aware of a stranger’s five-foot-eight-and-a-half stature now, thank you.

“you have to meet her!” chrissy gushes, bouncing up onto her toes.

eddie hangs another shirt. “you have to chill.”

“hey!” she pouts, pixar princess cute. “you wouldn’t tell the sun to dull its shine, would you?”

“i mean, i would, but i doubt the giant ball of plasma cares what i want.”

“okay, whatever, eeyore.” she rolls her eyes but she physically can’t stop beaming even as she does it, and eddie finds himself melting under it — some sort of radiant area attack coming from the apples of this girl’s cheeks, he swears, because the next thing he knows he’s agreeing to go to rando new girlfriend’s housewarming party this weekend so he can meet her properly.

only he doesn’t get to meet her properly, because when he shows up to the party the two bedroom apartment is packed with people he’s never seen, and it’s loud as fuck in here and he’s sweating through his leather from the six flights of stairs he had to climb to reach the place, so he steps through a sliding door out to the balcony and lo and behold, if it isn’t Upsettingly Beautiful Man looking upsettingly beautiful — positively fucking divine, actually, the last wisps of fuchsia sunset catching the gold streaks in his hair and dotting the tip of his flawless nose. Seriously, does this dude have any flaws? A scar, a birthmark, an unsightly ingrown hair? Eddie can’t even see a single blackhead for fuck’s sake.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer” the dude mutters, turning to look at him, and, “oh, my god, you again?”

“uh.”

“i’ve got a fucking coaster this time,” the guy says, lifting his solo cup and giving it a little shake to point out the cork round sitting underneath it, “so if that’s what you came out here to berate me for, then you’ll have to think of something else.”

“uh,” eddie says again, because he has no idea what brought this on but he’s pretty sure it has shit all to do with him, and pretty boy’s really working himself up now, arms moving in sharp gestures as he paces back and forth on the short balcony.

“not that it even matters if i didn’t have a coaster, because this is my house! i can do what i want with my own fucking stuff in my own fucking apartment, nance, i don’t— uh…”

pretty boy’s face blossoms rose petal red, a heavy blush creeping up his jawline as he catches himself mid rant and folds in on himself, crossing his arms over his chest with a sheepish expression.

eddie’s always had a thing for shepherding.

“i’m listening,” he says, popping a cigarette in his mouth and holding the pack out in offering. “if you care to vent.”

the guy — steve, eddie finds out — tells him all about his controlling ex-girlfriend as they work their way through two cigarettes each, the sun slipping away to reveal a full topaz moon, big and low and close, ripe citrus bending the branch of a tree. nance was a real piece of work by the sounds of it, and eddie feels like an absolute shit for the way he treated steve, who had apparently just gotten dumped the night before they met and had been out shopping for a “please take me back” present.

“like that was ever gonna work,” steve mumbles, ashing over the railing. “pathetic. anyway, sorry i was rude to you that day or whatever.”

“you weren’t.”

“nah, i was.” steve shifts his weight, knocks their shoulders together. “not that you didn’t deserve it.”

“yeahhhh,” eddie agrees, cringing at himself. “sorry.”

“all good. so what’s your story then, huh? who pissed in your cheerios that day?”

eddie blames the alcohol fumes wafting from steve’s cup — a justification that makes perfect sense and would totally hold up in a court of law — for what he says next.

“honestly? you.”

steve’s face is so cartoonishly offended that eddie busts out laughing, eyes crinkling, head thrown back.

“oh, so you’re just an asshole,” steve nods sagely. “first cute guy to flirt with me in six weeks is a lunatic. love that for me.”

“no, i—” eddie laughs, “okay, we’re coming back to how you think i’m cute, but i just meant, uh-”

oh, fuck it. eddie’s never been good at holding his cards close to the chest. more of a 52 pick up kinda guy, historically, and why change now?

“you were so gorgeous it, like, genuinely upset me for a second,” eddie admits, running his tongue over his lip. he stubs out his cigarette; turns to look right at steve. “like, uh, like cuteness aggression or some shit.”

steve mirrors his posture, leaning an elbow on the railing, nearly chest to chest. “so you are crazy,” he smiles.

“that’s correct.” eddie swallows.

steve moves in to close the gap. “good crazy?”

“fun crazy, so i’m told.”

“i’m gonna kiss you if that’s cool.”

“very”

the kiss tastes like ripe citrus

[crushedsweets]

Would you ever consider including nurse ann in more of your art/ stories? She's one of my favorite characters and I think your design for her is amazing lmao- I'd also sort of like to know what her relationship with the others would be like

yes. actually. i would love to . ok i have some vague ideas for how shed fit into the lore so thatll be under the cut !! i also start rambling about lulus lore too cuz i decided theyre friends.

ok so, again, my au is based around slenders forest being like... some sort of magnet for the paranormal. slenderman wants to keep all of these cryptids within the forest.

since its in a fictionalized forest in tuscaloosa, where marble hornets was filmed, i decided to move the abanonded hospital they visited up north of the tuscaloosa lake. she roams there.

SOOOOO nurse ann is just... a demon. slenders forest is sort of like limbo for a lot of the cryptids and kinda puts them in like.. a long daze and loops unless they're consistently leaving or being grounded by humans.

i dont EXACTLY know why/how she's in that specfic hospital, especially since i dont believe she has an official origin? maybe when the hospital shut down, she was let go and wasn't transferred to work in a new hospital, so she lost her shit and preformed some crazy rituals that ended up making her an undead nurse ? now she's forever roaming the hospital. or maybe she was killing patients when she was a human and kept doing weird demon shit with their bodies and the operator/zalgo fed off of her bad vibes. LOL IDK.

now about lulu cuz i drew her too.

i used to be sooo fond of lulu. and i originally said she was just going to be another ghost roaming the forest pointlessly, mourning everything and being incapable of interacting with humans, BUUUUUT. she is 24 and NOT A GHOST?!?!??!?! IDK WHY ALL THIS TIME I THOUGHT SHE WAS JUST A GHOST WHO AGES CUZ YK HOW CHIBIWORKS STUFF WAS BACK THEN LOL... i def am tired of little kids being tortured and all these children ghosts tho so im kinda glad to have smth new to write. anyway. so im thinking lulus just another little demon thing... i'm thinking her story goes.

she was in strict private schools all of k-12, and went to uni on her own in tuscaloosa. she wanted to branch out, have a little rebelious phase, make friends, etc. tried to join a co-ed frat. she experienced an absolutely horrific hazing when she was like 19, the frat fully believed they killed her by accident and in their panic, tried to bury her in slenders forest, and some demonic entity in the forest infected her before she was buried fully. she ends up climbing out of her shallow grave, never having died. perhaps the operator did it, perhaps zalgo like in her og lore ? PERHAPS ANN CUZ SHES A DEMON HERSELF?

anywaaayyyyy :3 l think theyd be cute friends. they just look really cute together and i could see good chemistry so i totally would love to expand on them and make them friends. maybe expand more on the type of species they are, what kind of powers they have(esp if i make ann the demon who infects lulu).

BUUUUT ALSO this made me realize i should totally look into adding zalgo to my lore. cuz it doesnt make sense for the operator to make anyone a demon, thats not really what he does.... and i dont want him to do that i just dont like the vibes. so mmm yes.

anyway in terms of relationships..

lulu and her are cool good besties beautiful they would take selfies and do tiktok dances together.

masky and hoody are incredibly indifferent to her, because they dont have to worry/visit her often. she stays in the hospital thats in the forest, and thats exactly where slenderman wants her, so theyre content. theyre kinda grateful she keeps lulu in the hospital too, cuz lulu actually freaks them out bc she'll be jumping at them and shit talking about their eyes.

tobys EXTREMELY scared of ghosts (bc of his hallucinations of his sisters ghost . . ). he eventually gets over it(kinda?) with sally, but he keeps accusing ann and lulu and the sort of being ghosts cuz they just.. kinda pop in and out. at least jack has to walk into the room to show up. so he doesnt like them

mmm jack wouldnt like her IF he knows that she kinda turned herself into a demon through like, a ritual or smth. he'd be beyond pissed to know someone CHOSE to be what he is. if he doesnt know, he doesnt care for her. he kinda jokes about 'well why dont YOU be their medic' and shes like 'dont fuckin wanna be'.

jane and liu and kate prob dont know her... kate might but wouldnt care.

jeff would prob think shes hot or some bullshit and nina would be beyond pissed. at first ninas like AHHH SHES SO COOL cuz shes a fangirl at heart, but the second she hears a single 'goddamn' from jeff shes livid.

ben prob wouldnt care much for her... hes so uninterested in demons idk why i just feel like he doesnt care.

clockwork would LOVE HER. she'd think she's so fucking cool. she'd try talking to her all the time but ann prob wouldnt be interested in clocky at all...

ofc the proxies purposefully come into contact with the paranormal the most because thats their job, so i wrote the most for them, but that doesn't mean theyre the closest or anything.

ok thank u anon you did smth to my brain that benefitted my mental health cuz i love writing this shit for the creeps thank u sm .

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

05/22-23/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Cast & Crew Sightings; David Jenkins; Rhys Darby; Vico Ortiz; Kristian Nairn; Jes Tom; Watch party Reminders; Enby Gender Census; Fan Spotlight; Mermay; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Tonight's Taika;

Hey crew, I've been kinda knocked out with work and life the last few days. Trying to catch up <3 Hope you all are hanging in. Sorry for the delay!

== David Jenkins ==

Chaos Dad did a hat tip to our lovely friends Our Flag Means Sass on his Instagram

Source David Jenkins' Instagram

The speculation on what this is about is that the NBA will be moving from WBD to NBC, Amazon and ESPN.

= More Chaos Dad =

It's David's sister Tracy's birthday today! He sent out some goofy and fun love her way.

Source: David Jenkins' Instagram

== Rhys Darby ==

Our Captain posted a very silly video these last couple days on The Cryptid Factor Patreon! This time, Rhys came up with a Musical Improve with the help of his son Finn and other members of Big Cow Band!

Note: You'll probably notice I'm not sharing images / content from Patreon, this is because the creators on Patreon have asked us not to, but also because we want to make sure they're being properly supported!

Wanna check it out? Visit The Cryptid Factor Patreon!

== Nathan Foad ==

Source: Nathan Foad's Instagram

== VIco Ortiz ==

Vico's been busy! Getting some love from fans of The Diablo's Curse and getting some love from Jack <3

Source: Em Roar's Instagram Stories / Vico Ortiz' Instagram Stories

Also some new BTS on Vico's Patreon!

Wanna view the BTS? You can sign up for Vico's Patreon here.

== Kristian Nairn ==

Kristian just feeling cute today <3

Source: Kristian Nairn's Instagram

== Jes Tom ==

Jess and Elliot out and about at the Hot Girl Summer Tour!

Source: Jes Tom's Instagram

== Watch Party Reminders ==

Dates: May 20 - 26, 2024 Times: 3:30 pm PT / 6:30pm ET / 11:30 pm BST The #RhysDarbyFaction will be hosting OFMD Season 1 on the RDF Discord Server. Don't have access? Reach out to me on @gentlebeardsbarngrill on tumblr, or @aspirantabby42 on twitter.

Next week we'll be doing the same thing with Season 2 of OFMD

May 28-31 (we're skipping Memorial Day) Times: 3:30 pm PT / 6:30pm ET / 11:30 pm BST

== Gender Census ==

Hey Non-Binary friends! There's a Gender Census going on by an independent researcher. If you're interested in filling it out, it's available thru Thursday 13th June 2024. Gender Census 2024

== Fan Spotlight ==

= Cast Cards =

Tonight's cast card by @melvisik is the lighthouse keeper that Ned Low was being a complete dick to!

Source: @melvisik's Twitter

= Colouring Pages =

More colouring pages from @patchworkpiratebear! For all you Izzy stans out there you'll love the first one! This would be a pretty damn cool coin! Tumblr - Indestructible Little Fucker / Lighthouse

= Our Flag Means Fanfiction =

Another episode this week from Our Flag Means Fanfiction! This time The Blackbeard Episode!

Source: Our Flag Means Fanfictions Instagram

== Mer May ==

= Chlorallines =

Today we have a MerMay submission from an artist we haven't seen in fan spotlight before-- @chlorallines! Really beautiful work dear! I'm loving the bubbles and lighting, it feels so sad and hopeful at the same time!

Source: Chlorallines Tumblr

= ErosTheArist =

More submissions from @erostheartist for MerMay! Blind Man's Cove is particularly creepy! Love it! Day 15: Blind Man's Cove / Day 22: Gravy Basket

= Snejpowa =

Who needs one dagger when you could have ALLLLLL the daggars. Loving all the submissions today from @snejpowa! Day 22: Gravy Basket / Day 23: Dagger

= Spencer Does Artt =

Finally catching up with our crewmate SpencerDoesArtt's MerMay Submissions! I cannot get over the Izzy eyeballs, they kill me every time I look at them.

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A post shared by spencer (@spencerdoesartt)

== Love Notes ==

Hey Lovelies! I hope you're hanging in there. We're getting to the end of the week, and it's a long weekend for a lot of folks in the U.S.! Hopefully you've got some downtime planned (no matter where you are), you deserve a break.

Tonight I wanted to send a reminder to try and give yourself some self care this weekend. I've been very bad about it this week and my body is finally telling me so, so here's some gentle reminders for you!

Remember to take your meds today!

Drink plenty of water! Yes I know tea is delicious but it can dehydrate you, so remember to drink some water too when you get a chance :)

Take a shower or a bath, you'll feel way better afterward!

Eat something yummy, and something healthy too! Give your body something it wants, it'll tell you what it is.

Make sure you get plenty of sleep, if you have an extra day off-- take advantage of that! Sleep can do wonders for your mental and physical health.

Try to laugh if you can-- watch something funny, read something funny, look up a terrible dad joke on the internet-- ask a friend for a laugh. Laughter can do so much for us and helping to release some of our fight or flight stressors.

You're doing great lovelies. I know it's been a lot lately, but you're really doing great. You've been working so hard, and you're making incremental progress towards your goals. I'm really proud of you. Remember to be proud of yourself too <3 You are such an amazing person, and you deserve to rest too.

Happy weekend all <3 See you on the flip side.

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Tonight's theme is eyes. Look at these two. Those eyes are so expressive.

Tonight's gifs courtesy of the delightful @fandomsmeantheworldtome and @ofmd-ann!

[kattythingz]

ACCESS GRANTED: THE SECRET SATURDAYS ELRIC-YAOS

Yeah, that's right. I made a fucking Secret Saturdays au. I doubt anybody even remembers this show, but who cares baby!!! The brainworms whispered to me, and they told me to feature edling as Drew & Doc respectively, Nina as Zak, and Lumi (snake baby) as Fiskerton! And who am I to question the brainworms???

(Seriously, Ed is a ONE-TO-ONE of Drew. It's kinda scary. And also explains a lot of my love for them both.)

Just relabel the cryptids as chimeras in this au and the kur stone as the philosopher's stone, and bam.

Also, I have no design for him but Greed is absolutely Van Rook. Yes, Ed's ex in this au. Yes, Ling has BEEF with Greed at first. They'll be fiiiine tho. Probably. Iykyk lmao.

Alternative portraits and stupid design details under the cut!!!!

Edling wear their wedding rings as necklaces to avoid damaging them in battle. Given 90% of their job always leads to one. Technically, Ed started the habit, but Ling is a goddamn dork and wanted to match his husband.

Everyone in the family sports some kind of braid and belt. Ed wears a white smaller one over his purple as a nod to Ling's style bleeding into him, and—vice versa—Ling wears a black belt as a nod to Ed's.

The belt is also Ed's way of wearing his husband's culture somehow. (The leather is not going just because he's married now. It's practical!)

Ling's sun pattern on his shirt matches Ed's belt medallion. (Re: dork.)

Ed's spear (and medallion!) is a gift from Izumi! After he was separated from Al years ago, Izumi took Ed in and taught him all her arcane and martial ways. The spear itself is actually a detachable dagger, that Ed elongated into a spear because that's just more his style.

Like Drew's sword, when it's powered by the sun, Ed's spear can shoot fire. (That's what the pattern is, Ling. It's not a fucking lotus, for the last time!)

Ling's sword isn't powered, but the elaborate scabbard was a late gift from Fu.

(Ed's glove is also a gift from Greed from when they were dating.)

The family has been to enough colder chimera habitats that Ed's permanently switched to Northern automail.

Nina wears a mix of elements from both her parents. A Xingese shirt like Ling, and hardy tights and boots like Ed. The knee guards were a mutual insistence from edling.

The buttons on her shirt are poppies! Exactly like Ling's favorite nickname for her, yīngsù (poppy).

Her right-hand bracelets are color-inspired by her parents too. Her left hand's one is just a cute handmade one spelling her name.

She's strangely short for an eleven-year-old. Edling have gotten one too many comments confusing her for eight. Unknowingly being the philosopher's stone and unlocking said powers young does that to a child's growth.

She has a weapon to focus her powers. Unpictured cuz I failed to figure out what it would be lmao.

Lumi's breed is an evolution of the Nambian flying snake! Her species can't quite fly anymore, but they can still glide their massive weights with their head fins.

She learned all her facial expressions from Nina. Hence the happy flare of her head fins, and her big, adorable "beam".

She's also blind! She was blinded fighting a bigger predator in the wild when she was very young, and couldn't possibly survive on her own after that. Edling rescued her not too long after they'd adopted Nina, intending her to just be a pet... Now just as much "their girl" as Nina.

They did not anticipate her to grow so large.

Ed was the one who named her Lumi. Luminous like the moon; or Lulu, as Ling and Nina insist on using instead.

(Ed's grumbling is full of shit. Even he slips up sometimes.)

Her scales reflect light in pearlescent rainbows meant to mesmerize prey! Optimized in the wild, she can camouflage to practically anything.

[another-sister-of-sin]

Ok so I’m back, and I have ideas about volunteer!reader

I haven’t written anything on here since BEFORE Phantom and Aurora were introduced!! So it was time to come back i think

This isn’t really in any order, just whatever comes to mind

Found family Papas/ministry and gn!reader

So Phantom and Aurora get summoned almost a year after reader starts volunteering, so they’re getting used to being around humans and adjusting to being in a band n stuff

So possibly Phantom and Aurora x reader because I think it would be cute (in my head all the Impera ghouls are like 30 and up including all the other papa’s ghouls, and the two new ones are more early 20’s)

Also possible Sleep Token Crossover because i think it would be funny. Like they stay over at the ministry for some reason, and everyone (especially the ghouls) are protective of reader. Anytime the Vessels walk into the same room as reader or reader walks into a room with any of them, reader is getting escorted out by someone from the ministry with some stupid excuse

And in that case then there would be a chance of the Vessels x reader. Im thinking they’re a younger band, and the Vessels were human at one point, but after dealing with their deity Sleep, they’re not quite human anymore. Whatever they are kinda sets off the ghouls because they can’t really detect them like they would with “normal” magic. More cryptid

The Vessels actively seek out the reader and Phantom and Aurora are just dragging reader away whenever they get a whiff of the Vessels

I don’t think the Vessels will ever talk, mainly communicating telepathically to each other and just staring at anyone else lol. Just generally unsettling to everyone around them.

The more i talk about the Vessels the more i want to include them so I think I’m gonna

It’s canon now sorry guys (not sorry)

[cryptidwrestling]

I need to sleep. I am putting way too much thought and upset energy into a scripted sports soap opera 😂😭 Anyway

Some Of Cryptid's Current Thoughts And Feelings™ On The State Of Her RAW Faves

1) Liv Morgan's booking.

Ya'll. I'm a Rhea simp/stan and a person second, anyone who's been on my blog for more than thirty seconds knows this 😂 And I've also made it no secret I, for the most part, am actually still enjoying the Liv v Rhea feud. So all that being said, what the fuck is going on with Liv's booking.

I know she's a heel and part of a heel faction and in-ring bullshit is the name of the game, but the fact that neither of her title defenses have been won clean (granted, she didn't technically win the Bad Blood one anyway but whatever we all know that ending was botched and she was supposed to technically win) and 9/10 times she runs from Rhea when confronted. They're making the Women's Champ look weak.

Liv can be cunning and vicious, we've all seen it; for fuck's one of my favorite theories that I'm willing to die on the hill of is Liv still just using Dominik as a pawn and is gonna drop him the moment she realizes he doesn't fit in with her plans anymore. Book the feral Liv if they're gonna keep this storyline going.

2) Finn v Damian

I mentioned this in a another post but I feel like the reason they weren't pushed as hard is because they didn't want to risk something forshadowing the PunkIntyre feud...And if that's the case, they shouldn't have had Finn turn yet. With this theory in mind, and tbh even if NOT true this would have still worked, the tldr in my head is

-Dom's turn should have been the same

-Have Finn, and the rest of the JD stick around and the rivalries be Dom v Damian and still Rhea v Liv

-Bad Blood rolls around, Dom and Damian have a match, and Finn's turn comes in the form of him and the JD assisting Dom.

-The Finn v Damian feud kicks off the same night Punk v Drew ends

There was NO REASON to have Finn turn and to wait this long to really start doing something with it. I still standby my opinion if done right, this rivalry could still be AMAZING...But it doesn't change the fact it has lost a LOT of momentum going the way it has.

3) Rhea Currently Standing Alone

To a degree, I get it. Her and Damian agreed to do their own thing because he's done with the JD (as far as he thinks.) and they're in different divisons but he would/will always come if Rhea called. I'm not a fan of how fast they split them up as a team-again, wave two of the Terror Twins shirts had barely shipped when this happened-but this segement was okay. It was sweet and mutual.

THAT SAID.

Rhea is currently in a 2v1 (not counting Dom cause I have little hopes of us ever getting a sanctioned match with them cause ✨intergender✨🙄) rivalry. Liv has Raquel...Who the fuck does Rhea have? Tiffy? Maybe, but we can't even say that for certain because as it sits right now, they're on different shows. Show borders are just currently being blurred in, assumingly, prep for Survivor Series.

Why the fuck does Rhea currently have to stand alone.

4) Jhea

THIS KINDA PIGGYBACKS OFF MY LAST PARAGRAPH AND IS THE ONE I REALLY DON'T GET??? Okay, yes, it was probably supposed to be something cute and just for fun to fill time while the other main storylines Rhea and Jey are/were in moved along. But if that was the case, why did ya'll move it to the main stage and not just keep it in backstage segments? Rhea during a preshow interview, I think it was Bad Blood?, said Jey showed her what a real man was like. Not to mention Jey coming to Rhea and Damian's defense or Jey agreeing to tag with Damian cause he "can't say no to Rhea." Why the fuck would you plant seeds like that on screen, on the main stage, and then just??? Drop it??? I don't get it???

5) JEY MOTHERFUCKING USO'S 28 DAY REIGN

I'm gonna make this one short and sweet cause you can literally see all my posts directly below this word vomit and see how mad I am 😅 But, in short; Why. Why not wait until after he's done with the Bloodline to give him a title? Why not have this same set up but give him the title ages ago. Give him a decent title reign with the same ending. Predictable at that point sure, but okay...What is the fucking point of having him, a fan favorite who everyone was cheering the house down the night he won, get his first solo title ever after fourteen years...Only to give it back to Bron less than a month later?

Bron is a GREAT preformer, do not get me wrong but making this...I don't want to say newcomer, but newer star a two time champ in his lesser time with the WWE just doesn't sit right with me.

I know Jey was gonna get involved with the Bloodline story at some point. I know it would have been hard to impossible to book him in a Smackdown story as a RAW champ...They could have done in without stripping his first non-tag title from him in under a month. We could have gotten crashout Jey going after Solo and Co without what we got tonight.

[psychiatricwarfare]

Hello Hello I'm your friendly neighbourhood ghost and I am a collector of spooky tales, folklore, Urban legends, cryptids and spooky experiences and I was wondering if y'all want to share y'all favorite one??

Thank you and I hope y'all are having a blast

hello!! we absolutely would love to share!! we love a good spooky/strange story, and altho you only asked for one, we can't choose one favourite soo heres a few under the cut.. :3c

first we'll give ya a spooky one! it takes place shortly after i was born, barely talking yet, our childhood room had a closet that was connected to the attic. apparently only my dad went into the attic cus my mom & sister were too scared and we were an infant. but whenever my dad went into the attic, the windows would be open and he'd have to close them. then he'd go yell at our mom asking why she kept opening the windows, but she didnt. cus she was scared of the attic. so one day they were arguing about this in front of me & my dad said smth like "well then who's opening the windows, huh?".

& apparently (according to our parents) we point up at the ceiling to the attic and said "man". so ofc our parents were like huh?? so we did it again & ofc my parents were like 'oh shit we're haunted'. but the ghost wasnt actually like.. doing anything other than opening the windows so my dad just kept closing them and everyone kinda left him (the ghost man) alone.

then, out of nowhere, when we were like 3 years old ish, we would just start screaming and crying in the middle of the night. full-on hysterics about "the man in the attic". so our grandma flew in to come bless the house with sage (we assume) and free the spirit peacefully and respectfully. the only thing we actually remember from this whole story is her walking around the attic burning something and repeating stuff. we're told she also made my dad do it with her, not sure why she chose him tho tbh. anyways everythings been fine after that and ever since then whenever smth weird happened in the house we'd be like "welp, i guess the man's back"

second story isnt super spooky but it is weird. this one starts when we were maybe 4 or 5? we were at a paranormal sites tour on vacation, i know how this sounds but stick with us here, the tour guide said to take 2 pictures because you might not get the ghost in the first picture, but you might get it in the second. now im prettyy sure this is actually something to do with the flash and lens flares but, my mom, sister & i still did it and sure enough my sister got the pictures with & without a little orb! how fun! we save the pictures to a flash drive or something to look at for years to come.

years pass and we're all looking at the pictures (as we'd done many times before) and we get to the pictures from that tour and were like 'oh we should show dad' so my sister calls my dad in so he can see the two pictures, one with the orb and one without it. except this time when we're looking at them, neither one has an orb. and we sit there dumbstruck because we'd looked at them so many times and there was always an orb in the second picture. we still dunno how it just disappeared.. our dad was just sitting there like ".... 😑😐🤨 what are you showing me?" as the rest of us went through the 5 stages of grief trying to accept that the one time we thought to show him our ghostie picture, it stops existing :(

last one's gonna be our fav cryptid!! theyre called the fresno nightcrawlers!!!! theyre super cute little dudes that were originally sighted in fresno, california (as per their name) but they usually show up in the US :3 they also showed up once in poland they usually appear in twos, one bigger one and one smaller one, but not always. they're very cute lil guys just look at them

theyre grey/white creatures with long legs with no arms or torsos, if you look closely, their knee bends where a human shin would be, so that rules out a person in a costume because their legs are too long with far too low knees to be a human. theyre known to be small (4'11/1.5m), but one sighting claims it was 7ft/2m~. perhaps the smaller ones seen are children?? from the footage we've seen, the smaller ones never seem to be sighted without a taller one. however, the taller ones have been sighted alone.

look at how cute this lil guy is!! this is from the first ever sighting of them, definitely check out the video we linked to watch it walk around

the person who posted it also embossed the video to prove there are no wires or anything, and in the screenshot above you can kinda see the lil guy and eyes potentially?? theyre kinda hard to see so we raised the contrast n such

some people think theyre puppets with strings and have tried to recreate them, which does seem to be incredibly difficult. the wiki (linked above) has the documentary where somebody tries to debunk them along with all the sightings & hoaxes. theyre funky lil dudes and since it harms nobody and affects nothing, we choose to believe theyre real :3

[im-not-buying-it-ether]

CRYPTID HAL AND CRYPTID BILLY!!<3

I honestly like seeing Hal either as a bird cryptid or aquatic cryptid, there's no terrestrial one, that man loves flying.. but the aquatic one is simply because nowadays i am in love with sirens tbh, they be interesting.

Flash: *opens a bag of chips*

Seal Billy giving him the biggest puppy dog eyes, while staring at him hopefully while doing the classic baby seal whine:

Honestly i love lighting Billy and OF COURSE the Bat wants to comfort Sparkles(im calling lighting Billy that), gosh that man is such a adoption addict...he definitely cried when Fluffball(seal Billy nickname) slept on his lap, he's like the Watchtower cat's, just like those classic "cat's office" cats, now im thinking of a batfam+fluffball interactions

Also may i present to you.. fluffy otter Billy? I have found one on Pinterest and i almost cried at how adorable it looked.. to send the pictures i will have to leave anon mode lolz, but i don't mind tbh!

Also another take: Actual bat Billy, for the BAT-son, not because of Batman so it becomes ironic that he adopts a kid with bat features and more of a: "My bio dad used to be a goddamn actual BATman.. oh lord..."

None can resist the EYES!

Lil otter Billy is indeed adorable but can I offer a specific feline in the form of the Cheetah? Lightning fast, cute, kinda scrawny cause they’re thin, and they CHIRP!! Like a bird they CHIRP

Little otter Billy holding onto as much as he can, that video of a mom grooming her baby until he’s extra fluffy and can float cause of all the fluff cause he can’t swim yet so mom can leave for a moment, lil otter Billy dashing around people.

Bat billy would be kinda spooky but imagine just imagining him having a bit of a screwed up nose and a lot more fluff to his design, like a pronounced bit of floof around his neck and a more flow cape ala Dracula style cause he thinks he’s funny

[cringefail-hermitry]

I've been wanting to make a post like this for a while now, and well, having just finished a crucial stage of my life, I think this is a good a time as any.

It's gonna be a long one

Like, *LONG* long

Like, I Am Going To Mention Every Single One Of My Mutuals By Name long (if you'd rather not be tagged in the future, do warn me)

First of all, the primary purpose of this post is as a letter of thanks for the wonderful months you Tumblr peeps have provided me this year. I am not hesitant to say joining the hellsite was the single best decision I have made in the last 12 months, heck, I think about 2/3rds of the friends I mantain regular contact with nowadays came from here. But this wouldn't be a long post if it was just a brief "thanks y'all for improving my life". I'm gonna get into detail. And I'm gonna be sappy about it. You can't stop me. You're not my mother. And not even my mother could stop me from posting this.

I would've said "I thought long and hard about who I'd start with", if there was any question about it. There isn't. @tearychildren, where do I even fucking begin. I can't really say anything too specific because if I begin I don't think I'll stop and half this post is gonna be about you, and this is already a very long post, so I'm just going to leave it at this, you already know well enough just how much you matter to me.

Going onwards, another of the early spots goes to who I believe was my first mutual, definitely one of the first people I followed, @chlorohexidine, a long-time mutual and recent good friend, our daily chats, however short, never cease to be highlights of my days, your art is really cute (love me some rounded shapes) and brainstorming ideas for your TTRPG campaigns is always fun (I really like your worldbuilding, too). It's only fair to mention your (and my, just needed to make this segue well) good friend @xsenpi, infodumping touhou to you both genuinely got me through that month, and Undertale 2: Revenge of The Robots with Rei and TC has been a blast so far.

@soundsofastar is another that warrants special mention for actually changing my brain chemistry and making me appreciate the local wildlife even more than usual (if we ever meet in person, WE ARE GOING ON A NICE LONG WALK TO LOOK AT BIRDS TOGETHER, WHEREVER IT IS WE ARE WHEN THAT HAPPENS, MARK MY WORDS). Your art also makes me feel things. Not many things make me feel stuff a lot. That is impressive. I should be in a good spot to finish reading the Illuminae Files within the next few days, so please do pester me about it, otherwise the piece of media that the next person I'll talk about recommended to me will consume all the time I'd read it in.

So, the next person I'll talk about, @northwest-cryptid, thanks for letting me use our DMs as my Mabinotepad, and for getting me into Mabinogi in the first place, you've been both the direct and the indirect cause of many good times, and I gotta be honest I kinda admire you a lil' bit (and if you know anything about how I talk, I am horrible at expressing vulnerability, admiration and these sorts of emotions without a bunch of euphemisms unless I'm doing this sort of tangent where I attempt to talk about myself in a more depersonalized way, so what that sentence there essentially means is "I admire you a lot and you are an inspiration").

Another pivotal figure in how this year shaped out is @ratlesshonret, creator of The Bird Nest, site of many good times, who has exposed me and many others to some wonderful media (I AM GOING TO FINISH POCKET MIRROR SOMETIME, MARK MY WORDS), reading through all the chats in the server is usually a blast, too. Your contributions to my life cannot be understated. Seriously, thanks.

The next great friend I'll mention is @transgender-lea-crosscode, we've started talking more only recently, but have already bonded a fair bit, I reckon, damn you're good at Blazblue. You've dared to make me good at the game and for that, I commend you. You should say words about Zeroranger in my general direction sometime, I'd be happy to hear/read them.

Now for those mutuals that I don't really speak to, but are responsible for like, 75% of my total notes, like, everyone is more than welcome to jump into my DMs and start talking about anything whenever, but y'all specifically are folk I'd have started talking with regularly ages ago if I knew what to talk about. @hoshinoreika2004, @ward-leon, @edenplumreal, @tabnk2, @tapok-eve , @boofbv and @sorcerousbrick, thanks for all the lil' dopamine hits.

Shoutouts to @wretchedbirdthing for being normal about that bird, you're a blast to see on my dash and I wish you luck snapping those collarbones in twain to hear those gay little squawks.

@freiflies and @ottisbuns, alongside Tapok, Vic and Honret, y'all bring life into The Bird Nest, and although I haven't really shown up much there recently, I still read most of everything, the words are cool, keep up the good work!

@genericgirl420 and @mikusays-transrights, you two are the mutuals that suffer the least with The Distances, so let's do this in a more, well, local fashion. É genuinamente bom ver que a comunidade brasileira do tumblr está ativa e saudável, aumenta minhas esperanças de encontrar outras criaturinhas desse site maligno pelas ruas, sua presença, por si só, já melhora meus ânimos, por isso, agradeço profundamente.

Ok back to speaking in simplified Old German. This next section goes out to @lemocoffe and @teacup-of-doom, both of whom I haven't really interacted much, but what little there was was quite great, this is, in fact, an invite to do more of the interact-y thing. Y'all are cool.

Another shoutout to a frequent view on my dash, @lobotomise-me-please, whose "Boobs Girl Music" post still has 10k notes to me, I'll get back to mass reblogging it someday (if y'all wanna help, check out @boobsgirlmusic for the post, that's my Boobs Girl Music sideblog where I reblog Boobs Girl Music)

@aurora-veil, @limbuscompanyyuri and @thevanishedpeople-intothenight are up next, some of my first mutuals, y'all post good. And have been doing so consistently. For the past like, 9 months or so. That's impressive.

@meltingadoration, @holyitsquiverrflynn and @jestressofnihil, my more recent moots, there hasn't been much time to do the friendship-building and knowing each other thing, but all that means is that there's still many opportunities for that, which is cool.

Last but not least, the mutuals who I haven't quite gotten to know as well, but I'm inviting to chat anytime, @readysetgargoyle, @atlasmothss, @meeresengel, @flesh-borne, @b-kut, @aureatecenotaph, @risingdragonblade, @agender-witchery (your posts helped me immensely in figuring out gender, thanks for that) and @lich-of-lcorp. Y'all are cool, we should talk more.

And one last section for all those who I've been in touch with but aren't mutuals with, for any and all reasons (I do tend to reblog very, well, erratically), y'all deserve to be on this list, but I just didn't wanna bother you too much (I do have words of thanks to say though, if you want them, just ask).

This post is still too short to express how thankful I am for y'all existing. I don't think text could ever do it justice.

[crimetimesteadicam]

ok @morporkian-cryptid tagged me to do this fic author interview so here we go...

if you would like to do this, i am officially tagging you, yes you, right now. tag me back so i can see your answers

1 How many works do you have on AO3?

i got 40

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,044,749

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

sorry like none of these are lupin iii. a blight on my lupin iii blog

Wabisabi (991 kudos) - Spirited Away. idk it's short and cute, read it

BONES OF BLACK MARROW (952 kudos) - Homestuck. the infamous cyoa cannibalism sex fic. scrolling through the things people say about it in the bookmarks is always so funny

Cum mortuis in lingua mortua (925 kudos) - Homestuck. no clue why it has so many kudos lol it was like the first long thing i've ever wrote (a whole decade ago??? jesus). it's a d&d/discworld joke

Vanitas vanitatum (914 kudos) - Homestuck. the same d&d/discworld joke except the LI is turbo depressed. notable for being the only fic i ever outlined and edited and that's why it whips

Supermassive Retinol Overdose! (677 kudos) - hey look, a lupin fic made it on here!

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i do when i have something meaningful to say besides "thank you!" i don't have a lot of thoughts about my own work so therefore i tend to not respond if there's not a direct question :( my head is empty. i always respond to every single comment on the last chapter of longfics though because i'm always impressed people read that far lol. genuinely, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for reading all that

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

idk uhhhh i wrote a series once where two of the main couples break up at the end, but it wasn't really angsty

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

they all end pretty happily

7. Do you write crossovers?

if i did it was so long ago i don't remember it

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

no but people used to send passive aggressive hate about my art in fics once in a while. hasn't happened in like 2+ years

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes. every kind. EVERY KIND

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

a bot will sometimes scrape my high kudos homestuck fics and plant them on a junk ebook site

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yeah i think like 7 of them got translated into russian and do numbers on ficbook.net

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

in the past me and my friend would sit around a laptop and scream laugh write our way through crack fics

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

right now it's jiglup and fujilup

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

i finish almost all my WIPs because i'm a freak. if i don't finish a WIP it's because some dramatic life event happened. this has only occurred two times

15. What are your writing strengths?

im a funny binch

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

i don't outline or edit or re-read any of my fanfic. i just type it and then eyeball it for typos and then post it. i COULD outline and such to really make the narrative nice and tight, but i don't find it very fun to do (for fanfic) and this is like, my relaxing wind down hobby. i just wanna have fun haha. the only reason my fics like, make sense, is because i write at least one ending scene first thing and always aim for that, and also i write out of order so i kinda know the route of the story

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

it's fine if it makes sense to do it there as a narrative device

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

h-hetalia crack fic.....

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

once i figure out how to draw zenigata it's over for you bitches. luzeni hours on da clock

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

for lupin iii fic, i like Lightkeepers the best

[moshieee]

Hello it is I, random anon who does not know you and has never interacted with you before, what is your opinion of your mutuals?

Oh hi @bixell-pixell I'll include you even if we're not mutuals I think you're pretty chill all things considered

That's kinda it idk you that well

Anyways

You didn't specify so I'm going to list all my mutuals in the order of oldest to newest on my following page that I remember sorry of I missed anyone and for the @ s

*inhales*

@e-the-village-cryptid (I don't have a tag for e yet but it would probably just be E)

Not only the first person who I became friends with here but also the first one I ever started sharing my stories with, even if we don't talk too much I'm glad Every time we do and I see them on my dash, (they bring some of my favorite posts and when I do send posts sometimes I mix up and send them their own reblogs) I'm so glad we're still friends, thanks for letting me ramble about stuff for 6 hours hehe

@jaqofallgenders (no tag for jaq yet either)

my in person friend and the longest friendship I've ever had with someone, love you 🫶. I'll be more specific on Monday if our ADHD doesn't kick in and make us both forget

@strawberry-seal77 (seal-berry!!!)

Hi hi hi yellows my friend 👋 the person I consider to be the second ever friend I made on here, a lovely person as well and wait waaa and an amazing artist too 👀??? Love you silly goofball and the amazing posts and jokes you have we should chat more often I thinkith.

@rabid-mercenary16 (Rabid jumpscare)

Hey hey hey .... BWAMP! Hope you feel better soon

I probably have the most to say about Rabid but all try to make it a bit shorter. besides being the first artist to do art jokes and include me, with we also became mutuals and interacting around a time when my life started to get a lot better. Even if she's not the only factor in that I definitely associate her with stuff improving, and she did play a big factor in it (I already explained a lot on my Valentine's Day gift to her and the others). Also she's just an awesome person to spend time with and be goofy, amazing sense of humor and I just love being friends with such an awesome person and artist.

@dia-smthidk (Dia fren)

I'm assuming you don't want a bowl of soup

I also said a lot about them in my Valentine's Day gift, but we've become closer friends sense then even if we don't get to chat as much as I'd like to. I relate a lot and am surprised how we have so much in common. Amazing artist and person as well and I wish we could hang out more, idc if they think they're bringing down the mood when/if they bring stuff up about irl, and maybe I won't figure out their timezone but oh well, please take care of yourself gender sibling.

@bunnybunnsowo (BUN BUN BROTHER!!)

little brother 🫶🫶💝💞🫶✨👋❤️!!!

(I could have sworn we became mutuals before Dia?)

another person I shared a lot about with the Valentine's Day gift, I love you my little brother! Seriously one of the kindest people I've met and I'm so glad they have bug in his life. Bun deserves the world and they keep sending me opposum images!!! Gona die from cuteness and his kindness one of these days istg

@spookykittyzzz (greaah why don't I have a tag for you???)

A very kind person and artist I don't know too much sense we're not that close yet but love the few chats we have had so far. Hope we get to hang out more even if I'm awful at reaching out to others and saying hi.

@glitchyk (goop buddies)!!

Nooo the parallels

One of the first people who was interested to deep dive into my creations and ask about my stories and worlds They're probably competing with Rabid with how much I have to say about her/silly. Seriously it's incredible how much we have in common and now I get to share and collaborate our sonas stories together it's amazing. And as someone once said "you can yap for hours". I love how creative and clever they are, I just wish they would be kinder to herself. One day I'll make glichy see how awesome she is.

@unfunnyaceartist (Floridian disadvantage) I feel like I should change that

When I say I was shookith when ace asked to be friends I mean I was shookith first person so show up and ask that (the others kinda just happened). Amazing artist and don't believe her lies she is funny. I'm so heckn glad we're friends., love the goofy and silly idc if she's a bit of a simp they've helped me a lot start to understand slang and references I'm supposed to understand shhshsh (such is the curse of how I grew up) we need to make our mafia sonas interact at some point I can already imagine the chaos /silly

@neptunestoast (plushy slime)

Hugs hugs hugs*

Trying my best not to baby talk I swear. amazing person first person to show up and be like "hey I Wana do something for you and your friends". Love their humor and another gender sibling!!! Hugs for ever for as long as they're ok with it. I love their creativity as well and Noodle is so adorable. I just want to pick them up in a hug so much. Kibbity/silly

@ner5y (no tag woops ill figure something out)

What are you doing here??? How are we friends???

I was absolutely confused and startled when they followed me especially since it was during a spoons argument . Amazing artist like holy heck I wish I was allowed to curse on this blog. Their humor also took me by surprise when I got invited to the discord, and even if they doubt how well they're running it I think they're doing amazing. And I love our silly interactions like this one

@vexation-816 (chaotic ADHD buddy!!!)

Why did it take me so long to follow you istg

ADHD ADHD ADHD my buddy oh pal we both got that and it's driving us insane/silly. Love how creative he is and the ideas for his sona and character lore. Also one of the first people who shared a character they added to my nightlight au. This is getting twords the end and I'm tired of whiting so much and am on a timer oh no. But your amazing dude don't ever forget thag

@butlerbugbunny (anxiety bunny buddy)

This is why I didn't respond to the DM yet hshsh

New friend who I feel anxious talking to sometimes but a wonderful kind bunny who I'm also incredibly happy to be friends with. Love his art so much it's amazing (shoot shoot timer is going off) I'm glad he's their for bun and wish them the best I possibly can 🫶.

@lilithloves-you (lillith my be-loathed?) need to change that

Don't you dare bring up grilled cheese

Glitchys friendo who I'm also friends with now. We don't interact too much but I've sent her on missions to go hug glitchy (to help both of them feel better but shhh). I hope we become closer friends in the future.

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

got any cryptid Tex hcs? :D

YES YES YES OMG YES (<- he's my fav cryptid design I've come up with <3)

Animal(s):

•Mexican Free-Tailed Bat

•White-Tailed Deer

Bat Features:

•tall soft bat ears (they're so cute <3)

•bat wings (obvi)

•bat fangs (obvi)

•lil claws :3

•and I know bats don't really have paws, but I also kinda base his bat-features off the flying fox so- it's grounds to give him lil bat paws and lil paw pads :3

•red eyes

Deer Features:

•floofy deer ears :3

•deer hooves (obvi)

•antlers (obvi)

•he has doe eyes and this is thanks to the deer stuff.

•some random soft patches of fur (mainly on his arms, legs, belly, neck, and back.)

Misc. Info/HC's:

•can alternate between which animal he wants to represent(?) more, but he can also have all features at once.

•all of the other states for sure thought that Texas would be a longhorn or smth bigger and more powerful. And anyone that mentioned it was delicately placed outside of the window <3

•the little patches of fur will alternate between brown and black depending on what he's representing more

•hangs from the ceiling/doorway like a silly bat boy <3

[popstart]

Heyyy do you have any HCs about Katie and/or Sadie?

im so bad with coming up with random headcanons bc most of the "headcanons" i have for characters are just stuff i come up on the spot for how i think they would react with in the situations i specifically put them in when writing them, HOWEVER i have thought about katie and sadie in the context of like my specific highschool au but it works generally too

I totally see them as the type to be like those annoying honeymoon phase couples that skip class to be with eachother in the halls lmfao. theyre constantly asking to go to the bathroom so they can say hi to eachother in classes they dont share. basically LOL. if they share all their classes its bc they begged and begged admin to change their classes to the point they got so annoying they got what they wanted

also i feel like theyre lowkey like a cryptid to the other kids in their school because of the way theyre god damn always next to eachother. its like they teleport to eachother and no one knows how they do it. i feel like everyone knows them and kinda ignores them when not thinking about the logistics of how theyre always sticking together

anyways theyre so childhood bffsies which is cute and also has me believing they had 100 million billion sleepovers as kids. theyre the type. they would paint eachothers nails using week old magazines as mats and talk and talk and talk

I know you said katie and/or sadie but I just cannot imagine splitting them up enough to come up with separate hcs for them. they do kinda everything together and im sure they differ in SOME ways, its just very minor in the grand scheme of things that im like. is this even worth calling a headcanon

oh random thing though i like to think one of them is right handed and the other is left handed so they always bump arms when they sit and work next to eachother lol

[rhaegnarokmidwinter]

weird bleach headcanons part 5:  we’re in too deep now buckos

apropos of nothing I have more bullshit. in honour of our boy coming back, he’s up first. welcome, grimmjow. we missed you and your hole.

Grimmjow Jaegerjacquez: The universal headcanons for this man seems to be that he’s either a choke-me-like-you-hate-me-but-you-love me one night stand blow me in an alley guy, or absolute goblin in the streets softie in the sheets hard as hell shell but ooey gooey center guy.  Enter the variant, properly feral kitty cat Grimmjow. You don’t run into Grimmjow in a bar, in an alley, in a fight, or in a fucking coffeeshop. No. One day you’re taking out the trash when you run into this teal-headed juicehead who can’t keep his shirt on, digging through the dumpster cause the babushka down the hall threw out a whole ass rack of lamb when the power went out and it defrosted too quick, but hey he’s a Hollow and its free real estate free dinner. Prolonged eye contact ensues cause Grimmjow don’t give a fuck when he’s hungry but its kinda weird for you when all you wanted to do was take out the trash and now you’re having the worlds weirdest fucking meet-cute. And then he just? Walks away? With the lamb leg? You shrug it off because urban cryptids are the least of your worries except this one is persistent and you see him kinda going to and fro at random points of the day? Where does he work? DOES he work? You don’t know, he seems remotely put together and fucking shredded so he presumably works out and has the means to clothe himself. Then again you did come across him eyeing up a dubious piece of expired dumpster meat like he won the million dollar jackpot so its anyone’s guess how sane or employed he is. He’s like a stray street cat that does what he wants, and like a stray cat, its not that you’ve chosen to take in Grimmjow, Grimmjow has chosen you to take him in. Ichigo Kurosaki: Will never admit it, but he’s a fucking dom. The polite, respectful kind of dom who makes sure you drink your water, go to bed at a semi-reasonable hour and doesn’t run out of toothpaste, but who will also consensually spank and fuck the absolute brains out of you if you forget said toothpaste even though it was right on top of the list. Not like you’re complaining though. Jushiro Ukitake: An actual cinnamon roll and there’s no precise way of getting around this, or the gentle fatherly vibes he gives off. He is pure, he is daddy. The more attainable, tamer DILF to Isshin’s “unattainable DILF” thing. Gives off insane vibes that he’s into ropeplay but like, shibari. Like he’s more interested in the aesthetics of it. Cinnamon roll with a tiny hint of cayenne not too much though or it aggravates his throat! Kenpachi Zaraki: Alright uh, the obvious headcanon route for Kenpachi suggests he’s into hard and fast and the trope of feeling the dick in your lungs. Cooo. Coolcoolcool. I can respect that. Except we.. know Kenpachi likes to fight. And he likes to really enjoy the fight. If its over too fast he’s bored.  Consider if you will, Kenpachi, really getting off on edging.

take your time with that one I know its a lot.

Ikkaku Madarame: is a Manchester United supporter. I can’t explain this one.

[blade-that-was-broken]

If you do the whole JD was a songwriting cryptid and Floyd had a solo music career thing together then it’s a lot more likely that Floyd and JD encountered eachother and reunited way before Floyd got kidnapped and I kinda like the idea that Floyd and JD who were both traveling and involved in music had like a pretty decent relationship as brothers and like hung out every once in a while and wrote eachother semi frequently. Cause they’re reunion is like the only one that could go alright without being in a life and death situation they just vibe with JD writing Floyd songs to support his solo career.

In canon, it seems kinda implied that the brothers haven't seen each other at all in those twenty years (and JD thinking they were dead) but OH BOY it would be crazy if Floyd did this!

Like Floyd is in a slump and he misses his brother cause he could really write songs so well and then he hears about this dude that is currently living in the mountains. If you have something to trade, he'll give you a song and so Floyd is just like okay why not try it out and he goes up there.

And there is John Dory, just chilling and Floyd is just like it's you??!?!?!

And JD just being like DUDE YOU'RE ALIVE!

Which you know, would be hilarious and (kinda terrible at all fronts) after the whole hugging and shock, JD is all like how did you find me? And of course Floyd tells him what others have told him and JD just laughs cause like ooohhhh yeah, people come up here and give me stuff and all they want is a song and they give all this neat things. And he just shows off his machete or the chickens he was given and Floyd is just like...

How are you this way?

JD is so simple in the best way possible and I love that for him.

In that way, he'd also probably learn about what happened with everyone else. That Spruce and Clay left too. Although the whole OTHER thing could go two ways - either Floyd tells him the trolls escaped the tree (if he knows) or JD tells him everyone in the tree/the tree itself is dead.

(if it's the former, haha... yeah... JD would probably go try to find his bros and/or Branch ngl)

But i think it would be cute. I used to really dislike Floyd cause of his broken promise but now he's alright. Since he's not all made and grudge holding with JD, I like that kind of dynamic and I explore it a bit as he's the second youngest who went out into the world and had to try and take care of himself.

Anyways, yeah. Anyone who thinks JD wouldn't support Floyd's solo career is probably kidding themselves. Like c'mon.