#all i needed to do tho
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Sketching while streaming s5...
Jonathan Sims I will learn to draw you (this is my doing. I could draw him however I want and I choose to stick with an image of him in my brain that is difficult for me to draw. Masochism.)
Not s5 Mahtins below I enjoyed drawing cuz hes neat:
(Edit: I yassified Martin in the do not separate cuz I wanted his hair fluffier)
#yes I realize Jon and Martin are in different fucking art styles let me live#do not accuse me of being AI this difficulty drawing hands is all natural I worked hard drawing for years just to fucking suck at it#update I listened to 170 I heard it was devastating but my ass was LAUGHING#poor martin but omg me and my buddy had everywhere at the end of time in the background and shit was so funny#he forgor 😭💀#it was emotionally devastating at the end tho Jon suggesting he stay there um btich NO?!#Jon the literal Lonely is not worse tham being around you get a fucking grip#helen continues to be the best character her showing up for the juicy gossip is so fucking real#anyagays#tma#tma podcast#the magnus pod#tma fanart#jonathan sims#the magnus archives#my art#martin blackwood#jonmartin#jmart#tma jmart#tma season 5#tma spoilers#i have to make a diagram for my jon and martin designs for s5 SO bad#if only i could draw jon.... >:(#i need u guys to know that my martin loves plaid and jon is wearing a plaid shirt thats too big in s5... inchresting....
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i love the ao3 tagging system so much. you have no idea how much. it's amazing and precious and wonderful and delightful and one of my favorite things about the entire experience of using ao3. it sets a gold standard. it's my favorite. i love it
#this post brought to you by me remembering a fic i really liked and wanted to re-read#and i know it was in my bookmarks somewhere#but i have nearly 2k bookmarks#all i needed to do tho#was filter by fandom; which brought it down to about 400 fics#then by the two characters i knew for certain were in it; which brought it down to ~350 fics#and then by “cooking.” boom. two fics#and now i can read the fic i wanted.#took; like. two minutes. from the time i decided i wanted to find it.#if i had to do that with fanfiction.net? no fucking chance#anyway. gosh. i love ao3. and i especially love the tagging system <3#ao3#ao3's tagging system#my beloved <3
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"I'll show you every day that choosing to live was worth it"
some of my favourite scenes from @hijinks-n-lowjinks' fic things i would miss from the other side . this fic tore my heart out fr but like in a good way and i wanted to pay it homage the only way i know how <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#itafushi#fushiita#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#I LOVE PLOTTING AND ALSO SCHEMING#listen i have a lot of feelings and i needed 2 process them and i do that by making art 2 target my mutuals directly#read my about it's there it's in the fineprint if we talk You Are Not Safe smile#i just . BITING BITING BITING this fic#the domesticity the grief the casual yet unfathomably deep soulmatism.......im ruined i tell u Ruined#so naturally i dropped everything#remember how i said lefts/rights r my enemy my beloathed my nemesis. MIRRORS MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE FHGDSAJFGJS I WANTED DEATH#i was like this is incorrect. no this is correct. flips them around in my head. no im wrong again actually#purgatory tbh but we got there (watch me be wrong again tho if i am wrong again i think i will Cry)#anyway!!! i don't have much else to say except pls read the fic and show jinx some love they 1000% deserve it this fic 1000% deserves it#i could only draw so many scenes but i would draw all of it if i could#fr i ws so paranoid abt accuracy lmao cut 2 footage of me looking up rice cooker models and wtf the colour 'carnelian' was#i hope i got everything right i hope i did it justice :'>#also if any1 mentions how megumi's arm in 3 is at an awkward angle. look me in the eye and tell me youve comfortably cuddled with someone#i will call u a liar
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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lol I hope you weren’t under the impression that the dress was hiding how ill fitting your bra was….
i’m not really worried abt that bc imagine these in that dress. if you’re at my height or taller than me: YOURE WELCOME
#the lil dots are bc i’ve been sweating like crazy doing stuff outside and ughhh#i need to exfoliate#y’all i got a new shampoo bar tho and it’s SO GOOD my hair is so much softer#i’ve been having issues finding a good shampoo bc i went from soft city water m#to extremely hard water#and it turns out all those minerals dry my hair out which. i’ve never dealt with before haha#anyways god bless my great aunt and her impulse buying of shampoo bc she just gives me her extras it’s awesome m#talk#ask
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Scary Sunset.
I'm concepting things way outta order in this story, but I'm sure you can piece things together. Context is for a storybeat where, after defeating and capturing Adagio (thus having all three sirens in her possession), Sunset enacts her revenge plot to release the sirens on Canterlot as Thea discovers she's been manipulated. In a confrontation, the two scuffle and fight over the siren orbs while Sunset struggles with her conflicting wants and emotions.
#mlp#sunset shimmer#twilight sparkle#twiset#the orbs are the glass balls sunset carries on her back btw its in her cast line up art#deep down sunset hates thea. she was named “twilight” by celestia. the time of day succeeding sunset. she was always her replacement#but at this point in the story sunset's also fallen for thea. so it's also a conflict of wills in sunset. love or hatred.#hence the “don't make me do this” language. she's rationalizing her hatred and violence as thea forcing her hand and getting in her way#when in reality she doesn't need to do any of this. it's her last stand and outburst to cling to a life of revenge that she's grown too#fond of. because she knows thea has the power to change that and disrupt her identity as a pathetic victim who fell from glory#and that's scary. thea's a very scary thing to sunset because suddenly sunset wants something and to be someone new.#she suddenly wants to change. to be better for someone else. and she never thought or believed that could be an option for her#anyways toxic yuri yayyy#my art#the grand galloping 20s#character design#i hope i got across the pained conflicted emotions in sunset's face tho i belabored over them these past 3 days#i hope a look of anger and dissonance and guilt and “oh god i don't really wanna hurt you please just obey me” while trying to intimidate#is readable. if so it's all in the eyebrows babey
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from my new oneshot, 'the vexing village of vellmore' ✨ ao3 / wattpad ((it's about seb & clora visiting a cursed village and trying to figure out how to break the curse, and since it ended up being 50k words i decided to split it into 2 chapters and the next part will be out soon!🙏 also, while it does have spoilers for the raven and the snake, it's a standalone story and can be read blind💖))
#u know i had to do the alliteration title#heads up but theres a smut scene almost immediately 😇LMAOOO#im actually so happy with this oneshot as a whole tho its sooo self indulgent BAHAHA so i hope yall like it too🙏🙏#part 2 is already done and ill post it when i finish more art for it✍️✍️✍️✍️#i defs wanna write more lil stories like this with them....older and working together.....its so fun.....i just need more ideas😩#HINT HINT 😇😇😇😇#this has all ive been working on the past like week straight SORRY IF I HAVENT GOTTEN AROUND TO ASKS#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x oc#sebastian sallow x mc#clora clemons#choccyart#sebastian sallow fanfiction#sebastian x mc
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Eldritch/not-entirely-human Grunkle Stan stories have been eating away at my brain, so I have a silly little concept of Mimic!Stan.
He and his Mystery Shack are both mimics that lure tourists in as a literal "tourist trap" to gather and devour them! Since the house is alive, it raises a few (read: several) child safety concerns that lead to a LOT of rules to be created for Dipper and Mabel to follow when they eventually arrive, such as:
Be careful not to get lost in the winding hallways! The Mystery Shack is bigger on the inside, and you don't want to end up in the wrong areas.
Don't go through randomly appearing doors, they may eat you.
If you think you feel the walls around you breathing and the floor beneath you shifting, no, you don't.
If you think the walls feel a bit damp, you're imagining it.
Watch your fingers around windowsills! You wouldn't want to lose any of them.
Don't linger too long under the doorframes; it may start feeling like they are slowly constricting around you.
#his shack is basically his big ass pet- they have a weird bond thing going on <3#if the house is fed- so is Stanley and vice versa#also I need you guys to know that my dumbass already developed lore for this AU even tho it was supposed to be a small one because ofc I di#BASICALLY this guy is NOT Stanford's twin. like at all.#Stanford was born an only child that went to uni fine and came to gravity falls where he met “The Mimic” aka Stan#and Ford was fascinated by Stan and wanted to study him- while the latter was just like: omg friend!!#and Stan's way of showing his love as a Mimic was to replicate Ford's appearance EXACTLY to show that he cares and loves him#because in Mimic love language being able to imitate a human PERFECTLY down to every detail is an impressive show of attentiveness and care#Ofc Ford was thrilled by the awesomeness of this (*cough* nerd) but was also like: so how tf do I explain this extra clone of me that#sticks by my side like a barnacle#so the twin theory was made- Ford made Stan tweak his appearance just a little so that it doesn't look too uncannily similar to himself#and then Stan learned more about humans and came to adopt a persona himself#this is actually a way more silly AU than my other one because Ford- Stan and everyone else are straight up just chilling here#welp!#gravity falls#gravity falls au#Mimic Stan AU#stan pines#stanley pines#grunkle stan#grunkle ford#stanford pines#ford pines#the mystery shack#mystery shack#mimics#tw scopophobia#tw body horror#tw gore#my art
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I got my hair cut the other day and of course I had to draw the dca boys running a hair salon:
Sun would be so effortlessly charming. Always chatting away with customers, explaining each product he uses and how to best maintain and style their hair.
Moon I can see being popular with the less chattier customers (like me) but over time they begin to open up. I imagine he hums while working. Otherwise, he's all ears for the newest gossip.
(The clipped up hat idea came from @bamsara's solar lunacy doodles!)
Also I love the popular headcanon that the dca can speak other languages, so I can imagine them being a hit with the aunties.
The full sketch page under cut! And some of my other thoughts
Other thoughts about this... AU? Can I call it an AU? Feels kinda small for an AU, but whatever:
Eclipse works there too! Haven't decided if it would be canon or fanon Eclipse, though I really like the image of 4-armed Eclipse working on 2 clients at once (plus, the nickname Clip is perfect for this scenario)
of course they're great with kids! They'd be able to console kids that get scared of getting their hair cut. Sun would do a little trick and tell them how good and brave they are all the way through. Moon would console them and hum a soothing song (or hey maybe they notice the kid's wearing a disney shirt and starts humming some showtunes). Every kid gets a candydrop and a balloon on their way out.
y/n works at the hair salon as a part-timer and does tasks around the salon like sweeping, arranging bookings, washing hair, etc. They don't really care too much about their own hair, but the boys are always offering to style it, dye it, braid it. With y/n's permission, the boys always toy with their hair—patting it, combing their hands through it, brushing it over y/n's ear, ruffling it.
#fnaf sun#fnaf moon#fnaf dca#dca fandom#this idea has been running rampant in my brain while I've been trying to focus on my modules these past few days#I can't take any credit for their outfits tho these were literally just what the hairdressers at my local salon we wearing that day#this all started because my hairdresser was wearing a delightfully yellow sweater#and just ohmygosh hairdresser sunny popped into my mind#this was also an experimentation with colouring with markers#need more colouring practice especially with shading#also learned the hard way that none of my fineliners are waterproof#or at least they don't play well with my markers! they seem to work with my watercolour paints just fine#sighhhhhh#crab art#New Do Same You AU
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Okay last WIP spam for a while i just didnt really expect to work on it so much the last entire 24 hours.
#dragon age#dragon age 2#fenris#the blue wraith#i need you all to know there is always implied fenhawke when i draw fenris that's just how that is i will not change that#well see if i ever clean the rest of this up maybe maybe not who knows#i do like seeing the wips all together tho it's been an adventure
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Here is the finished version of my smaller & simplified Hierophant embroidery design! It measures 3.5 inches wide rather than 6.25 like my larger and more complex pattern, and I tried a different color palette for the background to bring it closer to the original card. It's still not perfect but I'm pretty happy with how it turned out!
This pattern takes a lot less time than the bigger one, so is more approachable. Both these patterns and my other designs will be available in my new etsy store as I finish writing out instructions and uploading them :)
This finished piece will also be for sale for anyone interested, and I am taking limited embroidery commissions for now.
#dragon age#dragon age: inquisition#the hierophant#solas#solavellan#dragon age embroidery#embroidery#my embroidery#my stuff#my art#ramblings#i will work on a full post for embroidery commissions later tonight maybe... pricing is so hard though#no way to get around that even now that i'm fast at them these all still take 25-100 hours depending on size/complexity#i might do some really mini ones like necklace sized though. tho idk if anyone would be interested in that#but i need to buy a new computer sooooooo
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lesbian pride moment 😳🌸
#jolyne cujoh#hermes costello#stone ocean#jjba#jojo's bizzare adventure#deliart#jolymes#i didnt make it in time for pride month. its 3 in the morning#but some for some time zones im just in time<3#focus here was GREEN i just wanted to work with lots of green colors#bc i never do and i need to improve at that#we ended up with neons tho still sorry#also the background was fully rendered so much details n stuff but u cant see it hehe bc i blurred it#that was what most of my time was spent on . btw#anyway. hope u all enjoy the dresses lol#might go back and fix some stuff tho bc i drew this in like 3 days from lineart onward#so i havent been able to rest my eyes inbetween. so ill probably find something i wanna fix later
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alongside someone like you
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk 266#jjk leaks#i feel like i say this after every piece at this point but iam once again. SO TIRED#collapses dead#cries i did it again i ws up all last night finishing the first 1.....tht one took *counts* 8 hours...#got 3 hrs sleep n picked up where i left off on th second one at 8 in the morning#2nd one absolutely ruined me n made the third one feel like a herculean task . even tho its literally just them on a bed#rooms....KITCHENS......beloathed!!!! public enemy no1 kill on sight!!!!!!#hell is real and they make u render different rooms of houses from scratch no perspective tool no clue what ur doing#n they see how long it takes u to completely lose it#clipped yuujis bangs back tho n i thought tht was cute . silver linings#1ST ONE WAS SO FUN ALSO idk if its bc outdoor environments r forgiving or bc i had more energy n was fresh faced n hopeful or what#but it is by far my favourite. once again pulled out nearly every nature brush in my arsenal#third one meh simple safe soft w/e i was just so exhausted after th kitchen tht working on it was such a slog#oh ya i added a bunch of scars 2 yuuji's arms n lobbed off his ring finger sighs the yuuji injury list (tm) grows every minute#also HINA USE YELLOW CHALLENGE CLEAR golden hour in2 sunset my beloved <333 easy warm light + safe homey Peaceful vibes...bless#cries eternally thinking abt them let us have this let THEM have this pls thank u#ok i need to not look at these anymore take them enjoy my contribution 2 the domestic itfs pile
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oh noooo or whatever
bonus aka The Real Motive Behind This:
SURPRISE double bonus. textless ver of the first pic under the cut
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#professor x#magneto#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus lehnsherr#max eisenhardt#snap sketches#guys i drew cherik after walking to the comic shop to see official cherik omg .....#context if needed: in like. issue 17-18 of the og run magneto hijacks the x mansion and sets up The Mental Wave Distorter trap#and unfortunately the second i saw it i knew what i had to do because I Cannot Be Salvaged#tbh this was suppoesd to be moooorrreee 2011 Yaoi Doujin Core but clakjkl i like it like this way i fear#i was gonna put dialogue bubbles for the first pic but like that a lot. even tho i did post a textless ver Bro My Head Hurts#this was also supposed to be quick and thats why its in a limbo of Effort Was Made and I Held Back#because after the sketch i realized i wanted to lock in. sort of 💀 still like it tho !!!!!!#more importantly dont take me to comic shops all ima do is think of ship art to make later !!!!!#on that note tho i did have a silly giggle to myself when i saw the resurrection of magneto#like it was the silliest reaction i felt like a dog jlvkjavlka#i also found another magneto-centered run im excited bout ...... both sets were missing One book so im gonna scream but moving on#uhhhh ok im done here. my heads been hurting all day i hope its nothing serious#whats funny is that i actually planned to draw movie cherik today but alas. plans were changed#theres always tomorrow !!!!!!!!! i love you tomorrow .....#bye bye im going to bed
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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KATE & ANTHONY BRIDGERTON + kisses 💋 in BRIDGERTON Season 3
#bridgertonedit#kathonyedit#katesharmaedit#anthonybridgertonedit#kanthonyedit#bridgerton#kathony#kate sharma#anthony bridgerton#kate bridgerton#kanthony#dailybridgerton#dailykanthony#bridgertonblr#perioddramaedit#netflixedit#tvedit#if i missed anything i will cry#did i go a bit overboard on this? perhaps but they deserve it!!!!#sucks that it took less than half the number of gifs for eps 5 & 7 combined than for all of ep 1 tho :/#please excuse my inconsistent colouring i've tried 5764946794 times and failed to fix it and as you might guess this took a lot of work#and i have reached my limit!!!#gonna need a few days probably before i gif anything else lol#maybe next time i will do the non-lip kisses dhjkghksdks i had to keep them out or this gifset would've been huuuuuge lol
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