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skylarbee · 9 months

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milex and 'white nights' by dostoevsky

if you love milex do not, for the love of god and the well-being of your mental health, read 'white nights' - i am crushed and utterly inconsolable, and the fact that this whole story fits so well with the lyrics of 'killing the joke' and 'the meeting place' and the la cigale performance has me wanting to cry until tomorrow, and i can't keep all these thoughts to myself.

for those that don't know, it is the story of a man who meets a girl and falls in love with her; unfortunately, the girl is in love with someone else and is waiting for him to come back to her; and in the end, she returns to her lover, but wants to remain friends with our nameless character.

the two characters meet during the night, always in the same place - 'but I want to see you tonight'

the man can't sleep, he is too excited about their next night when they'll meet again; he even goes back to their meeting place on his own: - 'he struggles to sleep at night and during the day/he's worried she's waiting in his dreams/to drag him back to the meeting place/his love had left him there' - 'he's crying out from the meeting place/he's stranded himself there'

things taking a wrong turn is indicated by grey and gloomy weather, rain and dark clouds - 'cause the clocks count down and we're in for bad weather'

the man confesses his love to the girl, despite knowing that she can't love him, knowing that what he is going to say "is all nonsense, all impossible, all stupid! I know that this can never be, but I cannot be silent" - 'why do I always have to go killing the joke?'

the man has been lonely all his life and has been unsuccessful with women, but despite his loneliness and despair, he manages to make the girl laugh multiple times - 'but I, I live a lonely life / but I, I know I'm a funny guy'

at the end, she writes him a letter, asking him to forgive her for leaving him - 'her voice still echoes/ I'm sorry I met you, darling, I'm sorry I've left you'

nastenka's lover has been away for a year, but before he went, he promised her that when he comes back, he'll marry her. but when he does comes back, he doesn't go to her and the girl begins to doubt his love for her - this is when how our character finds her. in her misery, she wants our narrator to come live with her and tells him that she will love him; but after discussing their plans, her lover turns up - and tell me that this does not remind you of la cigale:

"Come along! Look at the sky, Nastenka. Look! To-morrow it will be a lovely day; what a blue sky, what a moon! Look; that yellow cloud is covering it now, look, look! No, it has passed by. Look, look!"

But Nastenka did not look at the cloud; she stood mute as though turned to stone; a minute later she huddled timidly close up to me. Her hand trembled in my hand; I looked at her. She pressed still more closely to me.

At that moment a young man passed by us. He suddenly stopped, looked at us intently, and then again took a few steps on. My heart began throbbing.

"Who is it, Nastenka?" I said in an undertone.

"It's he," she answered in a whisper, huddling up to me, still more closely, still more tremulously.... I could hardly stand on my feet.

"Nastenka, Nastenka! It's you!" I heard a voice behind us and at the same moment the young man took several steps towards us.

My God, how she cried out! How she started! How she tore herself out of my arms and rushed to meet him! I stood and looked at them, utterly crushed. But she had hardly given him her hand, had hardly flung herself into his arms, when she turned to me again, was beside me again in a flash, and before I knew where I was she threw both arms round my neck and gave me a warm, tender kiss. Then, without saying a word to me, she rushed back to him again, took his hand, and drew him after her.

I stood a long time looking after them. At last the two vanished from my sight."

and despite all this, the man is not angry with her; the last thing he'd do is hurt her in any way; he wishes her to be happy - and realises, that all his life, he's only been truly happy during these nights with her:

"my god, a whole moment of happiness! is that too little for the whole of a man's life?"

which hits even harder if we read the epigraph of the story:

"Or was his destiny from the start

To be but just one moment

Near your heart?" (Ivan Turgenev)

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lightningzbolt · 3 months

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Awsten Knight Hair (Two different files)

I started with showing Red & Black first as it's the latest but I made 17 swatches. I think I covered every significant color, skipping most Greatest Hits hairs as those are a pain okay, I am but a single person with GIMP. I did do the scene hair but I would like to some day do it on another mesh. I sorted and organized all my pictures of Awsten, over 400 btw, by hair color, to help me figure out the best examples of each, and to figure out which ones were just faded versions of the others, a few swatches are 'faded' colors, and which looked distinct enough to make swatches for. Green seems most consistent, I have the most pics of blue. Greatest Hits tricolor and red & black are my favorites. The blue is the first color that shows up on the swatches so the thumbnail shows blue hair to make finding it easy. I tried to mimic that the two distinct reds were not exactly the same. I've gotten way too fucking good at telling when a picture came from even if the color is gone from it. None of these are what hair my Awsten Sim normally has tho.

This is. I made this a couple years ago and never changed it from most outfits as it just makes him stand out and it took hours to make, I wanted to get the most out of it. Just one swatch here. Both of these are base game mesh recolors, so nothing else is needed. Standalone files. Also I went out of my way to grab werewolfy poses and emotions because I think it's adorable, okay. He's the least intimidating werewolf, but still my favorite. Forgive Jack's face and body and everything being in frame a lot I am playing as him.

Hair 1

Hair 2

#sims 4 #sims 4 cc #the sims 4 #ts4 cc #the sims cc #ts4 #sims 4 cas #ts4 cas #cas #awsten knight #waterparks #hair #sims 4 hair #I got sick of Alex so I swapped to play as Jack so I could use him for jewellery stuff as I felt that pack fits Spellcaster aesthetics #But his apartment has no room for that shit so I set it up at his parents' house and they are a pain but they are spellcasters too #Anyway finding rocks is harder than I thought but I made a lot of jewellery for Awsten because LUNAR hahaha werewolf #But when visiting Awsten the first time also hoping he'd bite Jack from a new mod I got #Jack is dumb and he kept playing with Awsten's pet rat instead and LONG STORY SHORT he got himself bit by the dumb rat #Got sick and had like no fucking money and no quick way to earn it so I kept pickpocketing random sims to get some #Just enough that he could get the antidote and NOT DIE he almost fucking died #I tried messing with his bitchy neighbor when he was contagious but yeah other stuff happened with her instead #Anyway he is now barred from playing with rats as he is too dumb to live #Yeah I made hair for Awsten but I have nothing to say about him as a Sim #He's a dog that's all there is to it #Okay that is his house tho i built it when the Werewolves pack was new and I got him moved away from an apartment into Moonwood Mill #And got him turned into a werewolf #He has 7 cats btw #I made green hair for him first way back when before all that but this is a new version of it #I'm not a big fan of the purple

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my-thoughts-and-junk · 1 month

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thinking about dream daddy again and god brian makes me so mad

#random thoughts #dream daddy #HIS ROUTE ISN'T EVEN ABOUT HIM #okay so the thing about the fleshed-out routes is you can tell a lot about a character depending on how many people are around #like with craig his first two dates involve at least one of his kids and a lot of social interaction because he's so overworked #so his final date where you just spend time with HIM one-on-one hits a lot harder #while with joseph he surrounds you with people but takes little periods of time to be alone with you to make a move #before instantly surrounding you with people again so you don't have enough time to question if he just made a pass at you #which is why his final date with you on the boat hits so hard: he purposefully isolated you in a place you could not easily leave #so he could make his move #and with brian... all his dates involve daisy in some way #which would imply he's trying to maintain some sort of distance? but he's not. he actively wants to befriend you #daisy and amanda keep tagging along... and for what?#they're eventually sidelined anyway! each date involves a moment where daisy and amanda are gone and you get a moment alone with brian #brian is the dad whose kid is the most present in his route and it says. literally nothing about him #make it so your character keeps inviting brian out and brian keeps making it a 'bring your kid and make it a playdate' thing or SOMETHING #maybe he's been raising daisy by himself for so long he's a bit rusty on how to interact with someone he's interested in?#on the second date daisy and amanda could have stayed home. it would change nothing #have daisy be sick and amanda be otherwise involved (maybe imply they're both faking to get out of fishing/get brian and mc to smooch)#like i don't think i'd mind daisy being around so much if she wasn't such a nothing burger of a character #give her some flaws! have amanda think she's weird or creepy! show us why she has no friends!#why is brian's route centered around our mc's daddy issues. we don't know his dad. we don't give a shit about his dad.#brian's route's main conflict ISN'T EVEN ABOUT HIM??? WHAT THE FUCK #you're essentially forcing us to make a character choice based on a backstory you also forced on us. you fallout 4'd us.#like okay. there's a lot of 'here's a part of your backstory you didn't know about' in dream daddy but this specifically doesn't work #like the ska band? it's a jokey plot device that's kind of weak but also a bit whatever #alex? is an explanation for why you're a single parent. very sad. not very fleshed out.#mc's dad? IS THE FOCUS OF AN ENTIRE ROUTE?????? WHAT THE FUCJ #literally no reason to do that. it makes brian a flatter character whose whole purpose is to react to your daddy issues #GIVE HIM FLAWS. MAKE HIM THE ONE WHO TAKES THE COMPETITION TOO SERIOUSLY

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fazcinatingblog · 4 months

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More like IF I come back amirite, also stop making me feel guilty, also learn to spell (paralegal? Parallel? ...never mind doesn't parramatta), also like it's my fault she hires 53 accountants that can only do accounting and 1 admin person to send out the tax returns and invoices and

#this whole thing makes me mad #like I'm sorry okay i didn't want this to happen #other people are mad at me too and have to fly to Sydney alone and sit next to strangers at Taylor and #I'm letting down more important people than one little suburban accounting firm #like my parents have to deal with a week where all three of their kids are going through stuff #plus my nana needs stuff as well #and Charlotte needs looking after but she's got her childcare and the other grandparents but still everything's a mess #and then there's my housemate i mean she's okay i hope i didn't infect her and if so thank God i didn't infect her BEFORE taylor #no idk all round it's a pretty shit situation #Sophia have some perspective #oh and Collingwood just lost to norf Melbourne #Angus Brayshaw retired #There are no rules anymore it's all chaos and anarchy and we're living in the unknown #tom Phillips is at Carlton #Trent bianco has disappeared off the side of the earth and his mother has every mystic in the country looking for him #and I'm just alone watching modern family episodes trying to remember how Haley and Andy get together #when he's sitting outside the wedding in a taxi asking Haley if she meant a specific person or just in general #and Haley's crying because she wants him and finds him funny and cute but Alex told her off for having a crush on him and getting involved #fuck Alex #anyway where was i #oh yeah i don't know #discussing IF i come back and not when #wait no #i don't know #I've lost the plot

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icarrymany · 5 months

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i ranted 2 the bestie abt how. if you hc all the guys as man likers theyre all in varying stages of realizing and accepting that

#tim knows and doesnt care enough to worry abt what he cant change #jay knows but Doesnt Talk Abt It. may have even forgot completely and re-realized during season 3 lol #probably self conscious abt the way he comes off to other dudes :( no homophobic phase tho #alex dodges bi allegations (and feelings) all his life. thinks brian is hot and him n jay r weird Always #he has no reason to have internalized homophobia his parents are loving. he is just Like That #brian has to get rlly close to people to have feelings like that #never considered what it would mean to like a dude until he has the sudden urge to kiss a close friend #DOES NOT THINK ABT IT. he just doesnt unless he is neck deep in 'oh shit is this a crush'#him and tim have kissed at least once but just never brought it up again. the feelings were mutual though #not at all aware if someone has feelings for him especially if they arent super close

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missmitchieg · 2 years

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But yeah, I love that Julie says things like "no, no, that's the last thing that they wanted" and "they wouldn't stand me up again, they must have run out of time" with such certainty, like she just knows the guys learned their lesson the first time around so in her mind, it only makes sense that the boys that the guys are gone.

#julie and the phantoms #julie molina #luke patterson #alex molina #reggie molina #wow the guys must have really /really/ bad-mouthed Caleb when they told her about him huh?#wonder how much they just insulted him and insisted they like Julie better in between explaining the dea #*deal because like all Luke told her after visiting his parents was 'this ghost cursed us and we're dying so we gotta cross over'#and i feel like Julie would be like 'uh EXCUSE ME I NEED MORE DETAILS'#and Reggie and Alex would just relentlessly insult Caleb #'HA I got this. His name's Caleb Covington and he's a tacky bitch.' 'he's so RUDE too!' 'Manipulator.' 'Creepy.' 'I don't like his teeth.'#'I don't like the way he puts his hands on people.' 'Oh yeah. That made me feel gross.' 'His eyes are blindingly bright too. Like an alien.#'YES. ALIEN EYES.' 'And did you see the amount of gel in his hair? Ugh!'#ok i'm stopping there's a limit to how many tags are allowed on a post lol #but yeah I like that Julie (the important one here) didn't underestimate their love&loyalty to her for a second at the Orpheum #while Caleb just can't take a fucking HINT and just keeps fucking stalking and threatening them like HOLY SHIT DUDE MOVE ON YOU CREEP #this is why dark AUs work bc they're barely even AUs like Caleb's just Like That

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statementlou · 1 year

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#been listening to a series of random podcasts lately and most recently 1 a very in depth profile of an old band and #2 a deepish dive about the first out gay footballer in the UK #which has been 2/2 people who were gay and became fervently christian and critical of their inability to be 'better'#(straight)#and killed themselves #fucking horrible #time for a break from real life stuff perhaps a nice audiobook #chris bell was the gay member of the band big star #but the other guy (alex chilton) was notable for being plucked from obscurity to join some guy's manufactured boyband #who then got huge and he spent the year he was 17 playing 300+ shows #and partying with the beach boys and shit #and then some girl was like I'm having your baby and his parents were like get a fucking DNA test and he was like nah it's ok #pass #anyway then he quit the band to make cooler music on his own #copy of a copy of a copy anyway #like obviously this is not a parallel to louis in so many ways #but also I was like wtf am I listening to why is it like this

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vixlenxe · 1 year

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She’s not cute, but she’s hella scared.

Of life.

... And going home.

... And going to school.

... Like I said, she’s scared of life.

#[Rolling Girl] Yuki Satō; IC #[I see you talking Shit] Dash Commentary #Alex would actually make a better parent then the one she currently has #full stop

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areyoudoingthis · 1 year

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i love talking to my friends who also have shitty parents cause they immediately understand the situation without me needing to explain and it's like "one of those conversations?" "yeah"

#other people try to tell you that it's not that bad or that your parents still love you #and babe that is so far from the point it's a whole other universe #1) love doesn't justify shit #2) if it actively harms you it literally isn't love #it's a shitty behavior society has collectively agreed to call love but it isn't love!!!#3) sometimes your parents just don't love you and you have to keep going and living your life and i don't need a consolation price #I'm actually fine with embracing my right to be angry and acknowledging the limits that aren't being respected #I'm fine with loving myself and demanding my humanity and my identity be respected #I'm fine with being proud of myself #I'm fine with breaking out of the patterns of guilt and blame and people pleasing my parents have insisted i stay stuck in my whole life #i love the life that I've built #and I'm not gonna sit around expecting my parents to suddenly develop the emotional maturity they didn't develop in the past 35 years #i am who i am and that's actually something that makes me infinitely happy #they can take it or leave it #but it's their choice and they have to live with the consequences #alex txt

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astonmartinii · 8 months

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big reputation | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem reader

they may have a big reputation and they may be end game, but sometimes you need a push from your girlfriend to enter your reputation era

(also no hate to vasseur and sainz, it's just the way the fic had to go)

MASTERLIST | TIPS

f1newsandgossip

liked by user1, user2 and 13,209 others

f1newsandgossip: after ferrari's continued chaos and inability to get anything right it seems, do you think charles leclerc will stick around and renew his contract?

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user3: i love him and i love ferrari but if he wants any shot of winning a championship he has to leave

user4: i would die to see him at red bull or even mercedes

user5: would he want to be a second driver though?

user4: babes they treat him like he's the second driver at ferrari at least there he'd have a competent car and team

user6: yes ! he has to leave, no one at that team respects him anymore

user7: he should've left a long time ago but this season has to be the final nail in the coffin

user8: all he does it protect ferrari and ferrari don't even give a shit about him it's actually sad

user9: they don't even protect him from his teammate and his teammate's parents being rude about him in the media

user10: for real the man needs to stop being a team player and tell him how it is

user11: i feel so so bad for him because his childhood dream is turning into a nightmare and through no fault of his own

user12: i know y/n is absolutely seething and the only reason she hasn't said anything yet is because charles is so in love with the team that he won't say anything bad about them

user13: i need her to give him a lil slap around to get his head in gear

yourusername

liked by alexalbon, charles_leclerc and 1,309,556 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: you and me got a big reputation

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user14: me being delusional: OMG THIS MEANS CHARLES IS FINALLY ENTERING HIS REPUTATION ERA

user15: and then we remember rep is an album about love first and revenge second :(

charles_leclerc: is this a taylor swift reference?

yourusername: yes it is !! i knew you were actually listening when i gave you the full eras breakdown

charles_leclerc: i'd listen to you talk about anything

yourusername: even the things you don't want to hear?

charles_leclerc: i think it has gotten to that point, yes.

user16: WHAT DOES THIS MEAN ^^ ???

alexalbon: when will i be freed from the shackles of having to take cute photos of you two

yourusername: NEVER

charles_leclerc: is a seat on my jet not enough?

alexalbon: YOUR JET? i have clearly missed something here

maxverstappen1: alex is always free to fly air max (MY jet, factually)

yourusername: when did this become a dick measuring contest? (charles would win, you can all go home)

maxverstappen1: i don't want you to see my dick

charles_leclerc: i should think not verstappen

alexalbon: i don't know how i hang out with you morons

user17: gosh y/n is so sexy

user18: i am allowing myself to live in delusion and after the shitshow that was austin, y/n is initiating the reputation era and charles will either give ferrari hell or actually leave

user19: idk that man might be completely in love with y/n but he's even more in love with ferrari

charles_leclerc: nothing compares to her

user20: WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN?

charles_leclerc

liked by georgerussell63, yourusername and 1,204,509 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: hola mexico! can't wait for the weekend to start

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user22: post your team or car? no. post a random picture of your girlfriend? yes.

user23: he should post an explanation as to why his gf was being wined and dined by christian horner

yourusername: ZOOWEE MAMA

charles_leclerc: excuse me?

yourusername: instagram would ban me if i really said what i think

charles_leclerc: oh i'm blushing

yourusername: but always above all you are a cutie patootie

user24: i see posts like this and i wonder why do they always have break up rumours if they are this in love?

user19: bestie we simply cannot be believing everything we read, especially when it comes from a certain spanish paper

liked by yourusername

user24: wait what is this supposed to mean?

user19: any "insider source" at ferrari that has anti-leclerc info is usually the sainz family lol that's why other than ferrari being clowns in general charles needs to get the fuck out

pierregasly: rivalling me with just how much you post y/n

charles_leclerc: ummmm you've met her, and you wouldn't?

charles_leclerc: WAIT don't answer that

user25: so are we just ignoring that y/n was at dinner with CHRISTIAN HORNER?

user26: the red bull!charles dream a bit more feasible now and i am appropriately feral

user27: obsessed with how he's just ignoring the horner thing

user28: i am similarly obsessed with how the media are spinning this to an affair between y/n and horner LMAO

yourusername: he made us split the bill after ordering a really spenny wine :/

user29: I'M CRYING

user30: horner's like if i don't get a driver out of this dinner i will be having a nice glass of wine he's so real for that

scuderiaferrari: let's get it 💪

user31: GET A JOB. LEAVE HER ALONE

liked by yourusername

user32: lol she's so tired of being subtle

user33: TELL THEM SIS

liked by yourusername, redbullracing and 1,450,667 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

f1: BREAKING: charles leclerc signs for red bull racing for 2024 on a four year contract

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user36: they're MUGGY for the first picture omg

user37: SOMEONE CALL THE EMERGENCY SERVICES FOR ME I CAN'T BREATHE

user38: wait so like who do i have to thank for finally making this happen?

user39: this has y/n y/ln written all over it - the dinner with horner finally makes sense

pierregasly: WHAT ?????????

user40: HE'S FINDING OUT AT THE SAME TIME AS US? DID ANYONE KNOW?

user41: THERE WILL BE NO EXPLANATION JUST REPUTATION

liked by yourusername

user42: okay since y/n and charles have referenced the reputation album so much during this whole fiasco .... taylor swift x charles leclerc piano ballad collab when?

user43: so this is il predestinato who has betrayed his team and completely blindsided him? this is why carlos has always been the superior driver

liked by carlossainz55

user44: not carlos liking this comment

yourusername: i wish he would say something with his chest, always hiding behind his parents and the spanish media ... yeah we know about that and we're no longer under that stupid contract so i can and will say this all to your face

user45: HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTT

carlossainz55: you got the move and attention you wanted stop trying to drag me into it

yourusername: babe there's a difference between you and i, you create fake cheating rumours to try and shake your teammate while your PR team is fulltime constantly having to threaten legal action over you not being able to keep it in your pants

user46: ERM QUEEN THEY STILL HAVE RACES TOGETHER

redbullracing: anyways.... WELCOME TO THE TEAM CHARLES

user47: admin what is going on?

redbullracing: i have no clue but as soon as that man is in a navy race suit i will get the tea trust

user48: so real of you

maxverstappen1: ☕️

user49: LMAO KING

yourusername: i have a feeling we might get on (no more inchidents though)

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, charles_leclerc and 1,344,099 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: they said i did something bad, why does it feel so good?

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user51: momma does not play oh my

taylorswift: proud 🖤 🐍

yourusername: approved by our lord and saviour, thanks mother

charles_leclerc: do you need a pianist?

taylorswift: i'm sure we can work something out

landonorris: ^^ this is so unfair i thought i was the swiftie on the grid :(

danielricciardo: my rendition of our song says otherwise

user52: she really said FUCK FERRARI AND FUCK YOU TOO

user53: as she should

charles_leclerc: i'm not a playboy but i do LOVE YOU

yourusername: i love you even more

charles_leclerc: NUH UH I LOVE YOU MORE

yourusername: i would literally fight every person on earth for your hand

charles_leclerc: oh wow ... mark me scared AND horny

alexalbon: okay that's ENOUGH

user54: i'm so glad she shook him out of the ferrari daze he. might finally have a chance at the championship now

user55: i'd be afraid that ferrari may build a good car next year but then i remember it's ferrari LOL

user56: so y/n mentioned under the f1 post about a contract? was she not able to say anything about ferrari while with charles?

yourusername: yes. i was not able to say anything they considered negative. many times when i expressed disappointment in how charlie has been treated i was reprimanded by ferrari and was banned from the paddock for weekends following any statements

user57: wtf that is crazy ??? makes sense as to why charles always blames himself when it was clearly a pit/strategy issue

yourusername: ferrari have attempted to keep charlie under wraps since his second season at the team. they were worried about him becoming outspoken like seb. this goes all the way down to his music which they tried to prevent him from releasing. i'm glad he'll be given the chance to show his talents next season

user58: thank the lord charles finally left. this is insane. the reputation era was well and truly needed.

maxverstappen1: kelly wants to know whether now you'll be wag teammates that you can raid each other's wardrobes?

yourusername: of course !!! i can't wait to see her more often coffee dates are a must ( + p of course)

charles_leclerc: i'm gonna beat your ass at padel i WILL be the padel king at red bull

maxverstappen1: i will show NO MERCY

yourusername: maybe this was a bad idea ...

charles_leclerc

liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 1,332,909 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: it saddens me to my core to be leaving the team i always dreamed of racing for and winning with, but there comes a point in your career when it's time to put your ambitions above tradition. ferrari has always been the dream for me, but the last couple of years have been a nightmare. i never thought i'd be put in a position where i'd have feelings like these about the team i love, but the constant disrespect, betrayal and the treatment of my loved ones leaves me no other choice. despite this sad ending, i am looking forward to new opportunities at red bull, racing alongside an old friend and under a competent leadership. finally, thank you to y/n and my family for being there for me during this time despite the way we were all treated. i know i will get questions, but there will be no explanation, just reputation.

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user59: he really left comments open so we could drag ferrari

user60: and drag i shall do... that man despite the absolute tomfoolery got that shitbox on the podium and NONE OF YOU SHOWED UP

user61: for real, they're out here trying to show charles as petty but then KEEP PROVING HIS POINT LOL

yourusername: i am so unbelievably proud of you. i know this was a hard choice but it's the one you had to make. today and every other day i will always be there to support you even if no one else is

user62: subtle DRAG

charles_leclerc: i love you to the moon and to saturn

yourusername: you're my invisible string

yourusername: also this is what i mean when i say reputation is a love story with a side of shade

user63: i know binotto let out a sigh of relief that he dodged this shit storm

yourusername: that fraud is SO lucky i was under contract while he was there otherwise i'd drag his ass so bad he'd be bald

charles_leclerc: i don't know how he made it out of silverstone alive after the whole finger wagging saga, i had to hold her back

sebastianvettel: i hate to say i told you so .....

charles_leclerc: SEB ????? BUT I'M DOING IT NOW, I'M NOT WASTING IT (tell christian to give me the better strategies i know you're still the o.g golden boy)

maxverstappen1: you know i can see this right?

christianhorner: and me?

charles_leclerc: @yourusername baby please take the fall for me

yourusername: I COMMENTED THAT

maxverstappen1: you guys really aren't slick... you're lucky i already love you two

christianhorner: i feel like i need to brief PR already

yourusername: if it makes it any better i'm a great baker and very generous

redbullracing: WE'LL TAKE IT

user64: @netflix make sure there's a camera in that garage at ALL TIMES

pierregasly: proud of you calmar, i hope this works out better for you than it did for me

yourusername: NO ROOM FOR PITY PARTY HERE SIR

yourusername: wait that was rude, we love you pierre

charles_leclerc: thank you pierre

pierregasly: ummmmmm tell y/n she can't say that ???

charles_leclerc: she made me see the light kinda owe her everything rn, so sorry?

christianhorner: definitely brief PR

note: teehee here it is. MY GOD my writing block has been insane - i also went on a trip to london and got horrendously drunk and made AWFUL decisions. alas, i hope you guys enjoy this and the race later !!

EDIT: I AM SO FUCKING ANNOYED AT THIS RACE ONE DAY WHERE CHARLES IS NOT FUVKED OVER IS ALL I ASK WHAT DID HE DO TO DESERVE THIS

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 instagram au #f1 x you #f1 #f1 social media au #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc instagram au #charles leclerc instagram edit #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc

5K notes · View notes

h4m1lt0ns · 10 months

Text

HEARTBREAK SYNDROME.

episode five :: 99 PROBLEMS.

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ pairing ︴max verstappen x ex!y/n

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ genre ︴social media au / irl snippets

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ summary ﹔comeback: download has started.

fc – wonyoung jang (28)

꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ warnings ﹕none.

☆ IMESSAGE with ; BOARD OF DIRECTORS.

y/n: not to freak you guys out but i knew all along

my baby lando: FYM YOU KNEW ???

babygirl alex: y/n 😁 i swear to god

honey badger: wait

honey badger: what do you mean you knew

chili!: ????

chal eclair: ^^^^

girlfriend kika: babe

girlfriend kika: i need u to explain before pierre loses his shit bc he’s bubbling rn 🙏🏻🤍

y/n: okay hold on y’all listen

wifey lily: 👂🏻👂🏻👂🏻👂🏻

y/n: i always had this sneaking suspicion that some bullshit was going but every time i’d ask him about nothing would come of it

y/n: so i was like maybe i’m the problem 😀

y/n: then i found lipstick in our bathroom and i was like yo ??? tf is this and max said it was his sister’s

y/n: so i was like oh calm

y/n: bc victoria would come over sometimes

y/n: then i found out he cheated the first time

princess george: fIRST TIME????

angel carmen: WHAT DO YOU MEAN FIRST TIME

chili!: HE CHEATED MORE THAN ONCE???

chal eclair: hOLD ON YALL IM TRYNA UNDERSTAND

y/n: yes 😭

y/n: caught him on a call with her being all lovey and shit and we got in a fight bc of it

y/n: and i let it slide bc i thought he would learn + he cried his eyes out

alabono: how is HE gonna cry for cheating 😟

honey badger: WAIT

my baby lando: fuck was he crying for ???

chal eclair: he cried ??

babygirl alex: literally what

honey badger: WAIT YALL

honey badger: Y/N YOU LET THAT SLIDE ???

y/n: I USED TO LOVE HIM OKAY.

chili!: i just sighed so hard man

y/n: hold on there’s more

PIERRE GASLYYYY: MORE ??

PIERRE GASLYYYY: y/n…

my baby lando: bae what is this…

chal eclair: what else did he do then damn

y/n: the bitch was in my bed

babygirl alex: WOAHHHHHHHH

angel carmen: now hold on, hOLD ON NOW.

girlfriend kika: i screamed

honey badger: ouuuuu it’s gonna get violent rq

y/n: i found them cuddled up, clearly post fuck, in my bed, listening to my music and guess what

chili!: BRO 😭

chal eclair: WHAT OH MY GOD

my baby lando: ¿¿¿

y/n: HER KID WALKS IN BEHIND ME EATING MYYYYYYY ICE CREAM

y/n: IN MYYYYY HOUSE

princess george: see this is where i personally would’ve swung at everyone

PIERRE GASLYYYY: LISTENING TO YOUR MUSIC???????

wifey lily: NAHHHHHH MAN

angel carmen: i’m not even kidding

angel carmen: i’m deadass speechless

y/n: i need all of u to come to my house immediately

y/n: there’s so much more i need to tell y’all

chili!: Y/N.

chili!: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERES MORE.

y/n: ….

chal eclair: answer the question bae 🤍

y/n: well

my baby lando: oh my god

y/n

♡ liked by lilymhe, landonorris, and 11,340,293 more.

y/n i could see right through it

1,302,293 comments.

username EEYUH. EEYUH.

theweeknd see right through it

➜ username spill immediately.

➜ username abel 😁 whatcha doing here bae 🤍

➜ username eXPLAINNNNN

➜ username my delulu is saying those are lyrics

➜ username ur delulu is deluluing

username i’m.

username MOTHER ?????

username SLAYED THE HOUSE DOWN

henrycavill 😍

➜ username SIR ???

➜ username hELLO

➜ username oh my fucking god.

➜ username ur joe king 😟

username ate soooooo hard

madisonbeer mommy?

➜ username OHHHHH

➜ username oh, my fucking god.

➜ username MADS????

username okay ma’am.

username UHM DEVOURED???

champagnepapi 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

➜ username why is the entire industry in the comments 😭

➜ username oh ur just like me fr 🙏🏻

➜ username sir this ur second time here, and i am very delusional. i will assume shit.

➜ username LMFAO

username i want you, sOOOOOO BAD???

username mhm. mhm. now that’s what i’m talking about.

charles_leclerc ICON 🗣

➜ username EEYUP

➜ username YESSSSS

username me wait for K to copy her

username whew miss y/l/n

username someone on twitter said thank god for ur parents, I too, say thank god for them.

bellahadid thank god you stuck to music

➜ username SOOO REAL

➜ username no bc y/n stays eating the gworls up

➜ username speak ur truth bella

carlossainz55 niña bonita ❤️

alexandrasaintmleux 😍😍😍😍

landonorris my mother everyone.

➜ username OUR mother

➜ landonorris i don’t share 🧡

➜ username HDIAOWKDJAP

carmenmmundt sexy.

➜ georgerussell63 oh swear?

lilymhe oh.

➜ alexalbon babe ??

➜ lilymhe no babe look away

francisca.cgomes i moaned ngl

➜ pierregasly HELLO ¿¿

➜ username kika is honestly the realest

➜ username no bc you and me kika 🤞🏽

➜ pierregasly you’re MY gf ???

➜ francisca.cgomes nahhh….

➜ y/n can confirm 😁

➜ pierregasly ????????????????

y/n added to their story!

#f1 #f1 fanfiction #f1 smau #f1 x reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x you #carlos sainz x reader #charles leclerc x reader #lando norris x reader #pierre gasly x reader #lewis hamilton x reader #daniel ricciardo x reader #george russell x reader #max verstappen x reader

2K notes · View notes

taasgirl · 2 months

Text

monaco pt. 2 - charles leclerc

summary: y/n is new to ferrari and is working very closely with charles, so it's inevitable that they fall right?

a/n: the outcomes of these races are fictional!! they're altered to fit the story, and there's no specific face claim! PART ONE PART THREE

liked by charlesleclerc, user56929, user77839, and 20, 872 others user55684 Y/N AND CHARLES GOING OUT TOGETHER OMFGGGG

user67298 there's no way they're not together

user98232 She's everything! And he's just Ken. liked by ynusername

user25938 the charles like??? i'm sorry what?

user98394 Omg no way! Teammates seen together! Who would've thought?!

liked by charlesleclerc, carlossainz55, landonorris, and 1, 254, 874 others ynusername australiaaaaaa ⭐

user93764 Future of F1

user83223 such a beautiful girl omg

user54739 Omg her bf!

user93283 *teammate.

user26352 Who is she hugging in the first photo??

ynusername my mama haha

charlesleclerc 🏆💗 liked by ynusername

liked by lilymhe, ynusername, williamsracing, and 345, 764 others alex_albon Not where I wanted the weekend to go, but I'm so happy for @ ynusername. Good job Charles too 😏

user53938 ALEX EXPLAIN WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK

user25373 i might be delusion but i might also be correct, that is 100% charles and y/n in the third pic and NO ONE can convince me otherwise

user67382 him and lily are so in love its gross

lilymhe You little shit stirrer liked by charlesleclerc

user33253 wdym good job to charles huh??

view charlesleclerc's story...

story has been deleted

liked by lewishamilton, charlesleclerc, landonorris, and 24, 673 others yn.jpg Wow I haven't been on this account in a while! Who's fucking pumped for Suzuka?????

user89352 ferrari is ur only red flag (please come to mclaren)

user03846 Charles' dabbing what the fuck 😭😭

user43572 That lockscreen is so cute (deluding that y/n is lightning and charles is sally)

user58293 Back to back wins?

yn.jpg I'm working on it!

user83743 not her posting this trying to pretend that we all didn't see charles' story

user99384 LMFAOOO

user45638 hey do u maybe wanna tell us something?

user68394 something maybe to do with a certain teammate?

liked by user33672, user79010, user44302 and 10, 762 others user52302 not charles' and y/n being driven around before quali 😭

user82992 She's so gorgeous wtfff

user67929 Charles' too!!

user53788 how is she so photogenic

user89203 being driven around as if that isn't literally their job HAHA

user62911 Like come on Charlie take the wheel mate

liked by ynusername, charlesleclerc, f1, and 2, 345, 782 others scuderiaferrari Charles and Y/N finished P3 and P4 respectively ahead of tomorrows race in Suzuka. Great work from our Scuderia Ferrari duo 💫

ynusername ❤️ liked by scuderiaferrari

user89032 noooo y/n please get podium tmrw

user67394 Matching pants 🥰🥰

user92093 Girl they're just wearing jeans...

user91304 omg my fave couple!

user90263 why is y/n not in any ferrari merch??

user72983 She's sponsored by a boutique so she doesn't have to

liked by ynusername, user56393, user99283, and 32, 563 others user78293 photos of charles with children to calm nerves on race day 🥱

user88392 he'd be such a good dad

ynusername This might actually be the cutest thing ever

user92039 YN WHAT ARE U DOING HERE?? user42537 HOMEGIRL UR RACING IN LIKE TWENTY MINUTES

user31732 idk how to describe it but charles is so girl dad coded

user18311 charles and y/n would be great parents lowkey 😏

liked by redbullracing, frenkiedejong, virgil, and 2, 221, 482 others f1 MAX VERSTAPPEN WINS THE JAPANESE GRAND PRIX!

user89293 Max WDC we are so back

user98211 i wanted y/n to win so baddddd

user23474 Max back where he belongs - at the top

user64737 give y/n max's car and she'd be invincible

user64535 She's only won one race??? she ain't all that

user12383 are u dumb she's only raced in 3 f1 races

liked by ynusername, user76372, user98273, and 348 others user23883 max and y/n through the years, and now they'll be on the podium together 🥹 i know y/n's inner child is healing

user82983 y/n really has been a ferrari girl since day 1 liked by ynusername

user54636 THIS IS SO CUTE

user43737 how tf did i not know they were friends??

user55232 no literally same like what

liked by ynusername, charlesleclerc, f1, and 1, 564, 828 others scuderiaferrari Our drivers are heading home now in preparation for Monaco. Y/N L/N P2, Charles Leclerc P4.

user88293 y/n looks so happy 😍

user92832 Don't ever tell me that they're no in love... LOOK AT THEM

ynusername We go again!

user36483 ik they're not officially a couple but i've never seen two drivers have so much chemistry

user63733 brocedes

user38283 carlando

user54738 Maxiel

once again struck down by the limit of photos on a post 😔 lmk if you like this or want to be tagged in the next part, i loved making this hehe (thank god for so much charles bf content fr)

PART THREE

471 notes · View notes

verstappen-cult · 3 months

Text

HOW YOU GET THE GIRL | CL16

— 05. THE END

PREV. PART — [ SERIES MASTERLIST ]

summary: in which charles has an embarrassing crush on alex's childhood best friend and everyone meddles. content warnings: faceclaim is taylor hill but you can picture her as you’d like!

INSTAGRAM STORIES

INSTAGRAM POST

Liked by charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc and 567,954 others

yourusername 🥂🌅🍋⛱️

view all 8,763 comments

user48 she's so hot i don't know if i wanna be her

zendaya prettiest girl in the world.

user49 is she with charles??

user50 her life doesn't revolve around charles.

user51 im pretty sure she's with charles.

user52 i actually saw a picture going around tw of her and charles like a day ago? so maybe they're spending summer break together user53 a fan ran into charles today in monaco so i don't think they're tgt

francisa.cgomes whoever told you to buy that bikini has excellent taste

yourusername i might kiss that person pierregasly HEY! that's my girlfriend you know. yourusername she wants ME

user54 what is charles doing in the likes

user55 yk sometime people like other people posts. user56 and they're dating so it's pretty normal user54 some people still act surprised lol

alex_albon you look pretty good (i was forced to comment) ((i'm held at gunpoint))

user57 she could be a model

user58 but she chose to follow charles like a dog user59 what is wrong with you people? you hate her just because she's dating your favorite driver. pathetic. user60 and she IS a model btw

INSTAGRAM STORIES

INSTAGRAM POST

Liked by landonorris, georgerussell63 and 768,998 others

oscarpiastri We had to leave the others behind. Sacrificies were made.

tagged: danielricciardo, yourusername.

view all 10,862 comments

landonorris WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE ME?

user61 wait. are they spending summer break together?

user62 girl have you been living under a rock? everyone's spending summer break with everyone. go check twitter.

lilymhe bring me ice cream :(

user63 im having a panic attack

user64 i may never recover

user65 THE 813 WE NEVER KNEW WE NEEDED

charles_leclerc where did you take my girlfriend?

danielricciardo pay us or you'll never see her again. oscarpiastri We'll throw her into the ocean. yourusername WHAT THE F

user66 OMG MY TWO WORLDS COLLIDING

georgerussell63 We're going to leave without you.

carmenmundt No, we are not. georgerussell63 Yes, ma'am 🫡

user67 I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY'RE ALL TGT I'M GOING TO CRY

user68 no one was ready for this

INSTAGRAM STORIES

INSTAGRAM POST

Liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc and 9,872 others

charles_leclerc 🌊🗺️🤚🥥

view all 8,776 comments

yourusername who's that handsome boy. 👀

user69 summer break is looking good

user70 screaming crying throwing up i can't do this anymore

maxverstappen1 No pic credits? I put my life in danger for you.

user71 Y/N'S COMMENT OMG

user72 my parents

user73 i want him so bad

user74 i need them to confirm their relationship

user75 i mean it's confirmed they're dating, charles called her his gf in oscar's most recent post user76 WHAT user75 idk why people need them to 'confirm' they just don't want to user76 she's been receiving sm hate online i understand if they wanna keep it a little more private

user78 STAY CALM EVERYBODY STAY CALM

user79 one chance thats all i ask

arthur_leclerc thanks for (not) inviting me

charles_leclerc adults only 🤪 pierregasly i told him to invite you charles_leclerc no you didn't stfu

user80 I FEEL BLESSED

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM STORIES

INSTAGRAM POST

Liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc and 9,872 others

charles_leclerc As Taylor Swift once said... love you to the moon and to saturn.

tagged: yourusername.

view all 15,846 comments

user81 I CAN'T TAKE THIS SHIT ITS TOO EARLY

user82 i'm sleeping on the highway tonight

yourusername as taylor swift once said... you are the best thing that's ever been mine. 🖤

charles_leclerc should we kiss now? yourusername i see you making eyes at me from across the room. landonorris there are children on this app

alex_albon fucking finally!

yourusername stfu

user83 MY PARENTS

pierregasly you can finally stop whining. 🙄

user84 THIS IS TOO CUTE

user85 oh my god they finally confirmed it

maxverstappen1 It was all thanks to me, you're welcome.

alex_albon it was thanks to me?? what are you on about maxverstappen1 If I hadn't threaten to punch him, he wouldn't have made things right. alex_albon I introduced them! yourusername no you didn't, you abandoned me and that's how i met charlie. alex_albon SEE?! THANKS TO ME

user86 con 😭 gra 😭 tu 😭 lations 😭

oscarpiastri Can you adopt me now?

olliebearman get in line landonorris i'm their first born child gtfo

georgerussell63 So happy for you! Can you get out of the room now, we want to eat.

danielricciardo they aren't getting out of that room😏

user87 AND WITH TAYLOR SWIFT'S LYRICS

user88 when is it my turn????

TAGLIST (bold means i couldn’t tag you) — @leclerc16s. @willowpains. @berrnuu. @minkyungseokie. @1655clean. @sassyheroneckgiant. @nessacarty1. @a1leexxa. @storminacloud. @lovstappen. @littlehoneyfreak. @paintedbypoetry. @miakat9. @scott-mccall-could-lift-mjolnir. @thatoneembarrasingmoment. @lyrasconstellation. @rhythmstars. @c-losur3. @apolloxxivmin. @janeholt3. @lovrsm. @gulphulp. @thecubanator2. @dark-night-sky-99. @ssprayberrythings.

note: oh my god, i'm so sorry it took me this long to finish this but here you have the final chapter. i'm not good with series but i did my best. hope you liked it!🤍

#꒰꒰ 📁 ─ verstappen cult files ꒱꒱#f1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fluff #f1 imagine #f1 grid x reader #charles leclerc x you #f1 smau

634 notes · View notes

im-probably-crying-rn-ngl · 4 months

Text

in another universe, george is the baddest bitch the pta has ever seen. he had the school board sweating by the end of welcome week. the parent's group chat waits with bated breath as he types. everyday at 8:30 am, right on the dot, gorgeous george is at drop off with his smoothie, sunnies and "did you check the email i sent?". with a final kiss to his child's forehead he is off to morning pilates.

"alex is just the funniest guy" all the other parents are half in love with tall, handsome veterinarian doctor alex albon. he is always a little late to afternoon pick up but a nervous shit eating grin is all it takes for the teacher to melt and fondly roll her eyes. it's really hard to stay mad at a man wearing paw print scrubs covered in dog hair giddily swinging his kid in the air.

oh yeah, they're happily married btw. somehow.

#galex #gr63 #aa23 #i had a thought and not much else

576 notes · View notes

formulawolff · 21 days

Text

xi. larger than life - t.w.

pairing: female driver!reader x toto wolff

word count: 3.6k

warnings: cursing, banter, teasing, flirting, mentions of sex, a teeny bit of angst, THIS IS PROBABLY THE MOST DOWN BAD TOTO HAS EVER BEEN, lewis being a little shit, alcohol use, marijuana use, yadayadayada

prev. | next.

“hey, there’s someone here to meet you. i think you’ll shit your pants once you see him.”

alex stands beside you, beaming as you wave goodbye to ben. it was early friday morning, around nine-thirty in the morning. since it was a more relaxed day, with the practice session the only obligation in your schedule, you had your parents stationed at the lounge area.

they were seated with lily, who was very eager to spend some time with them. after all, since alex was busy, she had no one to talk to. so, you figured it would be nice if they all had one another for company.

however, tomorrow was qualifying, where it would determine your place on the grid.

which, to you, that lap tomorrow was everything.

the defining moment of the weekend.

“who?” you raise a brow, “who could it–”

as you glance over your shoulder, your heart skips a beat as you see james engaged in deep conversation with him, the team principal chuckling, pointing to you. the visitor is dressed in a cream suit, a white button-up underneath, jet-black sunglasses resting on the bridge of his nose. swallowing the lump in your throat, you stroll towards him, running an absentminded hair through your hand.

“good morning!”

the words are almost a squeak, and you internally kick yourself.

the visitor’s lips curl upward, flashing a pearly white grin, “¡buenos dias! ¡bienvenida a miami!”

standing before you was none other than pitbull, mr. worldwide, mr. three-oh-five. rather than shaking your hand, he opens his arms, pulling you in for a warm embrace. you were probably sweating from the nerves and the humidity, but you didn’t care.

while you had met celebrities in your brief time as a formula one driver, most of them were european. so, you weren’t really quite familiar with their fame or starpower through football, rugby, television, and well, business. there were so many wealthy moguls who came through the paddock at the races, james and alex recognizing them in an instant.

on the other hand, you felt awkward, as you usually had no idea who that person was or what exactly they did.

so, to finally meet someone you were familiar with and recognized, in your home country, was a moment to cherish.

and well, you were a little starstruck.

“i’m going to admit, i don’t know much about formula one,” the singer shrugs, “but i figured i would come through and say hello.”

“well i’m honored,” a giggle bubbles up in your throat, “have you met with any of the other teams?”

“not yet,” he shakes his head, shooting you a wink, “this is my first stop. mostly because there is a very beautiful woman who drives for this team. do you know her, by chance?”

your eyes widen as you realize he’s referring to you. heat rushes into your cheeks, your palms clamming up, “oh my gosh – um, –”

“my apologies señorita,” he places a tender hand on your shoulder, “i know you have much bigger things to worry about. i wish you the best of luck today! make miami proud!”

“i will,” relief ripples as he leans in, pecking your cheek before waving goodbye, strolling away from the entrance of the paddock, security team in tow.

“jesus christ,” alex’s voice sounds from behind you, “he would fuck anyone, wouldn’t he?”

“stop it,” you hiss, swiveling on your heel, “he was just being nice.”

“yeah, yeah,” alex scoffs, rolling his eyes, “anyways, i noticed the other day you posted another set of photos on instagram. one of them had that mystery man in it. who is he? why hasn’t he come to the paddock yet?”

“because he’s been busy,” that wasn’t a lie by any means. the team principal was quite busy this morning, merely a few paddocks over, “i will see if he come to the next race. i doubt it, though.”

“what does he do again?” alex inquires, sitting on top of some equipment, “i think you told me but i forgot.”

“he’s in management,” well, that was half the truth, “he manages a sports team.”

“what team?”

“the new soccer team in st. louis,” firing back, you shrink a little under alex’s intense gaze, his lips pursed, brows furrowed, “since it’s only their second year, he’s been busy with promotional stuff. events, traveling, you know.”

“right,” alex sucks in a breath, “also, i know it wasn’t anything serious, but i was a little nervous when you posted those photos of the mercedes campus. i know there have been some rumors, but i would hope that you would talk to me if you were ever thinking about leaving williams–”

“oh, she’s never leaving us!” james’ voice chips in, the team principal coming up from behind you, “she’s stuck with us till 2026!”

at the sureness in james’ tone, your heart sinks.

fuck, this was getting complicated.

as you stood with james and alex, the topic shifting to the newest modifications on the cars, your heart thumped, pounding against your rib-cage. inside your mind, it was a tumultuous, chaotic mess.

your heart yearned to be with toto, yet you were so comfortable with williams. you were happy here, really. you had an amazing relationship with james, alex was like an older brother, and you couldn’t be any more grateful for the support your team had given you. since the beginning, they had made it very clear that they were one hundred percent confident in your capabilities, often reassuring you that were a talented driver with a very successful future ahead.

how could you just abandon williams like that? leaving them high and dry like that? with no warning either?

you could only picture the disappointment, the confusion, and the bitterness that would plague james’ features as you inform him of your decision.

god, that thought alone was enough to tear your heart into two.

sure, there were rumors. since that post with the mercedes headquarters, fans were buzzing with suspicions that there were contract talks. that you were going to announce your departure from williams any day now. that you were going to join toto wolff at mercedes.

since it was friday, there were only a couple of days before toto would ask about your decision. in that time frame, you needed to speak with james regarding the subject, fill alex in, focus on the practice sessions, make the most out of your qualifying lap, spend time with your parents, and most of all, focus on driving.

with less than forty-eight hours until then, time was of the essence.

and fuck, were you running out of that precious time.

a few paddocks over, a team principal raises an arm, waving to fans as they shout, a driver on his left, the other on his right.

“are you going to see her tonight?”

lewis’ question is innocent as they enter the garage, members of the pit crew swarming and flurrying about. they chirp greetings as the three gather around the cars, examining them.

toto exhales, inspecting the right wing, “you two are worse than the wags. i have never met people more invested in someone’s love life the way you two are.”

“well now that the cat’s out of the bag,” george crouches by a tire, “we get to pester you about it.”

the casualness of the conversation as the entire team was in earshot sent the team principal spiraling, his jaw clenching as bono approached them clipboard in hand, “you two also need to learn the importance of time and place.”

“we’ll just talk more about it later then,” toto curses as he notices lewis bearing a smug smirk, “after the practice session, we’re going to do a deep dive addressing your feelings–”

“good morning,” bono clears his throat, “did i walk into something important?”

“no, not at all,” toto shoots lewis an icy glare as george bites on his lip, stifling a chuckle, “let’s get to business. how are the cars?”

as peter began his report, toto couldn’t help but let his mind wander.

besides, it was not like he could focus these days anyway.

the team principal absolutely despised the hectic schedules of the race weekend. how he was constantly rotating between briefings, meetings with the engineers and mechanics, promotional events, sponsorship talks, and well, managing the two juveniles otherwise known as lewis hamilton and george russell.

then, there was the reason why they were all here. the race itself.

now, he had another pressing matter weighing on his mind.

three people were aware of his developing relationship with a certain williams driver. while he knew that two of the three would protect his secret, he was extremely cautious about the third. after all, the girl was only nineteen years old. she was young and impressionable. lewis’ little stunt with the cash proved that the girl was easily influenced.

however, as much as he wanted to fire the girl, he knew that he couldn’t.

at least, not during race weekend. that would be downright cruel.

monday would probably be a different story.

yet, if he fired her, would she just blackmail him? would she threaten to release the information involving him and his golden girl?

just the thought of her leaking that information to the press was panic-inducing enough.

he could offer her a hefty sum to stay quiet. but he couldn’t do that either. down the road, she could end up exposing him for paying hush money.

being romantically involved with a woman thirty years younger than him and offering his former assistant hush money to keep quiet on the matter?

that would send his entire world crashing down, bursting into flames in the process.

he would lose everything.

for the time-being, toto would just have to hold onto shreds of hope that his assistant would remain silent on the matter. maybe if he didn’t mention it, she wouldn’t either.

he would be okay with that.

on the other hand, his drivers were adamant that they wouldn’t say anything, swearing up and down that if preserving this little secret was this important to him, then they would abide by his wishes. at first, george was hurt that he was excluded from the conversation. he was angry that out of anyone toto could have chosen, he chose her.

yet, as toto recalled every little detail of his relationship with the williams driver, george’s bitterness dissolved, transitioning to some sort of understanding. toto thought he kept things brief as he explained his feelings, but the three were cooped up in his office for nearly three hours discussing the matter.

besides, it wasn’t like he chose the williams driver.

it just sort of happened.

now, here he was, pacing back and forth in the paddock, aching for even a glimpse of her. the rift between the two was driving him utterly insane, the team principal resisting the urge to take an impromptu visit, popping in for just a moment. just hearing the sound of her voice would be enough.

yet, he knew he couldn’t. it would raise too many eyebrows. it would stir up too much gossip.

“look at him,” lewis elbows george, “looking quite pitiful once again.”

“i feel bad for him,” george exhales, “i can’t be away from carmen for too long before going absolutely mad. i can’t imagine how he feels.”

“being so close to someone yet so far?”

“exactly,” george nods, “do you think he’s in love? he wouldn’t say it directly, but whenever he was talking about her, i could just tell. i saw the way his eyes lit up, the way he was giggling like a schoolgirl, and the way he couldn’t help but fight a smile. and not just any old smile.”

“oh he’s totally in love,” lewis remarks, “do you hear how he talks about her? he speaks with this softness. it’s cute, really. it makes me want to throw up but it’s cute.”

“do you think he’ll tell her?”

as the driver shifts his attention back to the team principal, he tuts, “not now, but soon.”

“how soon?” george presses, “because he looks quite pathetic over there, like a little lovesick puppy.”

“i’m willing to bet by the time we’re in monaco, he won’t be able to hold it in any longer.”

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“i feel the need, the need for speed!”

letting out a shaky breath, your fingers grip the steering wheel, so tightly you were sure your knuckles were white underneath the fabric of your gloves.

this was it.

the miami grand prix.

as you sail through the track, surprisingly, you feel nothing but peace, james’ voice over the radio barely audible. you felt like you were enduring an out-of-body experience the way your mind raced yet your body remained still, acting on pure instinct. your foot on the gas, tapping on the brakes every so often.

this was lap fifty-six out of fifty-seven.

the final stretch.

you were almost there. so close now. so close you could taste it.

behind you was lando norris of mclaren, max verstappen closing in quickly. charles leclerc tails max, desperate for the thrill of a podium.

the anticipation was growing as you near the finish line, the checkered flag waving in the distance.

was this a dream? were you really here?

squeezing your eyes shut, you blink, in a desperate attempt to distinguish reality from fantasy. yet, there’s a moment of silence as you make out the stands in your field of vision, as if everyone was holding their breath at once.

then, it all comes bursting in your ears. the roar of the crowd. the thundering of the engines. the booming of fireworks. it was almost deafening as your car slows, foot easing on the brakes.

“and she’s done it again! we just witnessed a moment in history!”

oh god.

you did it.

you won.

euphoria fills you to the brim as you scramble out of the car, climbing on top of it. pumping your fists in the air, tears flood your visor, blurring anything and everything all around. members of the williams team come sprinting towards the car, hollering and shouting. adrenaline courses through your veins, a tingling sensation buzzing from your fingers to your toes.

cameras flash as you raise your index fingers, members of the team following in suit.

you were one-of-one.

and by god, were you going to show the world that you were just that.

the world was going to know your name, whether they watched formula one or not. your name was going to be broadcasted all over sports channels for weeks to come. your name was going to printed on merchandise, jerseys, on everything and anything related to williams racing.

you made history today as the first american driver to win the miami grand prix. not only that, but you were the first american female driver to win two grand prixes consecutively.

and god, did that taste so sweet on your tongue.

jumping down, you’re greeted by james’ arms, the team principal rattling your helmet.

“great fucking job! great fucking job! you are fucking insane!”

ripping off your helmet, you catch your breath, taking in the moment. this felt larger than life. like a dream come true.

this was one of the best days of your life.

if not, the best day of your life.

and god, were you going to savor every moment of it.

each and every second.

the hours following the race were a blur. although you typically shied away from the press, you lost count of the number of journalists who approached you, answering each one of their questions with genuine, thoughtful answers. fans of all ages snapped photos with you, congratulating you with nothing but sincerity in their words. you signed some jerseys, some caps, and one woman even asked you to sign across her chest.

how could you refuse a photo worthy moment like that?

your parents were immensely proud, tears streaming down their cheeks as they wrapped their arms around you. although you wanted to spend the rest of the evening with them, they urged you to go out and celebrate. there was always time tomorrow, as they were flying out early in the morning tuesday.

so, when the boys offered to take you out to a few clubs across miami, you accepted it.

now, the bass pounded as you sway back and forth, screaming along with lando, oscar, carlos, charles, and alex as the music plays. lily tagged along, hovering alex, giggling as you chug another drink, the taste of alcohol lingering on your tongue.

“how does it feel to be a winner-winner?”

“pretty fucking good,” a few drops trickle down your chin, and you quickly wipe them away, “do you think i could win the next one?”

“ummm, let me think,” lily brings a hand to her chin, pausing momentarily, “yes!”

“you’re absolutely unfuckingbelievable,” lando nods enthusiastically, “you will probably win the world championship if we don’t up the pace!””

all of you were extremely tipsy, cheeks burning from the buzz of the alcohol and packed space. lewis and george came too, but they kept their distance, remaining at the bar while the rest of you were on the dance floor.

not only were you tipsy, but someone had offered you a few puffs of a joint while you were in line outside of the club. actually, they offered you the entire joint because the second they saw you, they immediately recognized you.

at that point, you had already pregamed at the hotel with the boys beforehand. so, how could you refuse a few hits of a joint? that would have been downright rude.

across the dance floor, lewis hamilton sits, perched at the bar, drink in hand.

it’s not like he came along to purposefully watch the williams driver. he just wanted to ensure that you would make it back to your motorhome by the end of the night.

cause god knew how fucked up the others were. they weren’t in any state to help you get home, safe and sound. fuck, none of you were in any coherent state to even call an uber.

plus, god only knew if you would run into anyone from the press or media. and who knows what you would possibly say if you were asked about a certain team principal.

“should i call toto?” george leans over, his voice slightly raised, “she looks gone.”

“hmmm,” lewis hums, his eyes following your every move as you stumble a couple of steps, “i don’t think a call would hurt.”

“now?”

“now,” lewis’ jaw clenches as he sets his drink on the bar, “call toto and get my card, would you? i’m going to wrangle our newfound friend.”

“should we have toto come get her or what should we do?”

rising to his feet, lewis surveys the crowd. it was packed beyond belief, inches between bodies as they moved to the rhythm. toto meeting them here would be far too risky. too many eyes and ears.

“call him and tell him that we’re going to help get her to the motorhome. or we can take her directly to his hotel room. i imagine she would prefer to sleep in her own bed. you know what? just have him meet us at her motorhome.”

“will do,” george nods, “i’m going to step outside to make the call. meet me out there once you find her?”

“sounds like a plan,” lewis suppresses a groan as the lights in the club are dimmed, more so than they previously were. everyone blended together, forming one giant mass.

this was going to be fun.

in his hotel room, toto wolff lays in bed, laptop resting on his nightstand. although he was oh so happy for you and your accomplishments today, there was this aching feeling gnawing away at him, nearly consuming him whole.

out his window, the lights of miami glitter, casting a soft glow over the city. the view from his room was oh so beautiful, especially at this time of night. however, it wasn’t nearly as stunning as you were.

fuck, he missed you.

more than anything.

he longed to hold you against his chest. he yearned to pepper your forehead with kisses. he wanted you, desperately.

actually, he needed you.

but he wouldn’t admit that.

suddenly, his phone buzzes, startling him slightly. plucking it off the mattress, the screen is illuminated with a photo of george.

hmph. that’s odd.

tapping on the green icon, the team principal brings the phone to his ear, “hallo?”

in the background, he hears a voice. not any old voice. your voice, barely audible, but enough that he knows it's yours.

“hey it’s george. she’s absolutely obliterated right now. we’re going to call for an uber, and bring her to her place. can you meet us there? i think she really needs you.”

“is she okay?” almost instantly, he sits up, “how long will you be?”

“are you calling toto?” his heart flutters as she giggles, the sound oh so angelic, “oh my gosh! is he on the phone right now? can i talk to him? pleaseee george? can i? please?”

“put her on the phone, george,” toto brings a hand to his temple, momentarily embarrassed at the desperation dripping in his tone, “please.”

there’s a shuffling noise as the phone is transferred, her voice, so delicate and sweet, pours into his ear.

“can you come over? i miss you so much. please, daddy. come over.”

“oh shit,” toto squeezes his eyes shut as he hears lewis’ chuckle in the background, “i’m not letting that one go.”

“i’ll be on my way soon, schatzi. do you need anything? it sounds like you need some water and some rest.”

“ummm yeah,” god, she was going to be the death of him, “i do need one thing.”

“and that is?” he’s on his feet now, shoving clothes into an overnight bag, “what do you need, schatzi?”

“your dick.”

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