#alas she was doomed by her narrative

[greenqueenhightower]

did alicent not know that the council will reject her? what was she expecting? it seems to me that she kind of knew this would happen but she was willing to delude herself for aegon’s sake

Hi anon 💚

I think that Alicent knows her fellow council members very well by this point, and she knows that they won’t easily accept her regency claim. She is nervous all throughout the council meeting about it but she keeps her composure and shows her professionalism.

However, I don’t think she is expecting to be so blatantly rejected by everyone in her council. She is so shocked and crushed because her trust in her allies crumbles, her worry about Aemond’s decisions heightens, and she feels her power slip away from her fingers. It’s a tough spot to be in, and Alicent loses faith in the system she’s been upholding all her life. No matter how many times she tries, she’s still unable to escape the patriarchy and has to work in service to it instead.

I love your comment about Aegon, and I agree. Alicent vying for the regent position is surely about her ambitions, but it’s also about Aegon’s future. She doesn’t want him to lose his privilege in case he survives. She seeks to safeguard his position and wants to be in charge so that she regulates Aemond’s behavior and ensures that he doesn’t become a usurper. But alas, Alicent and Aegon are equally doomed by the narrative from the start that he has to experience the same fall from power as her.

[panther-os]

honestly I feel like the narrative would've doomed significantly less people if jgy, instead of going "well there's no way to save face but to make this worse", had gone "hey it's too late to call off the wedding but not only are we half siblings but also alas I am a gay little man romantically repulsed by all women how do you feel about being my beard and adopting a kid who will call us aunt and uncle instead of mom and dad that way it's significantly less weird and bad?" and qin su had gone "as long as you be my beard too and I can have a cute gf" and jgy had gone "deal" and continued making out with lxc after his marriage because it's not being like his dad as long as there's an agreement and good communication and he's faithful to his domestic partner in domestic matters and to his romantic/sexual/emotional partner in romantic/sexual/emotional matters and not leading either of them on or keeping either of them in the dark

anyways I feel like they should adopt a-qing she would be the absolute terror of carp tower esp with jgy teaching her courtly manners aka how to politely insult people to their faces and they can't do anything about it without ruining their own lives, she has two moms and two dads and they each individually teach her how to be a socially acceptable menace in different ways and that is everybody else's problem, their family is loving and supportive and perfect and not incestuous and eventually she eschews propriety and learns cultivation from wandering cultivators sl and xxc and their pet serial killer because they're significantly more fun than the instructors in lanling and now she can have four and a half dads and two moms (xue yang is the half)

and yeah this definitely doesn't solve every problem but most likely quite a few!

[dragonfly0808]

Why Stormy?

SPOILERS FOR A MAJOR PLOT POINT IN SEASON 3

The first of a few posts explaining some of my fave/most iconic moments in the series so far, some of you may wonder, why was it Stormy that died? Especially since some may believe Darcy might’ve been the ‘better’ option.

First off I will admit, I did pull a red herring with Darcy with a few conversations she has in s3 about maybe leaving and in general her always having been the ‘lesser evil’ of the Trix.

This wasn’t a straight up red herring but I did want to set up Darcy as the most regretful of the three, the one who’s willing to keep going as long as the witches stay together. Once Stormy dies, the three are no longer together and Darcy finally refuses to keep going, seeing that the path Icy is on will only end in Darcy being on her own.

Now, as for why it was Stormy, I knew the ends of each Trix when I was like, a fourth into season 2. I knew one would die, one would be driven mad and the last one would return to Light Rock, utterly defeated and alone.

I debated with myself on whether it should be Stormy or Darcy to die, but in the end, I chose Stormy due to the thought of escalation and liking the idea of Stormy’s rage being her undoing.

Stormy is the one without a proper ‘origin story’, she was loved, she grew up privileged and had the opportunity to chose whatever she wanted to do with her life. However, from a young age, Stormy has an inexplicable rage in her very soul.

I love my morally gray villains/antiheroes, but I also love when villains are just… evil, no real explanation. That’s Stormy, she just craved power and chaos, her mom saw that and, from very early on, tried to help Stormy, get her into therapy, keep her away from anything that might trigger that deep-rooted rage that she didn’t know how to keep at bay.

Stormy’s doom is that rage and impulsivity, she goes too far, starts a curse that she can’t truly control and the curse starts turning against her, which leads to Musa having to bring the building down, killing them both in the process, but only one of them comes back.

I thought of this as, almost a bit of a self-fullfiling prophecy, even if the term doesn’t fully apply here technically speaking. Because Stormy has every chance to not be this, to turn back, to stop. She has resources and help from a young age, she shows that she’s willing to let Darcy go, but she herself cannot let go of that hunger, even knowing that it’s not very reasonable.

In the end, there as no real reason for Stormy to die, she knew how dangerous the curse she attempted was, she wasn’t supposed to even be there. And, even being there, she wasn’t supposed to initiate a curse, only take it. But no, she makes bad choice after bad choice and it leads to her death.

It felt appropriate for her. And, I won’t lie, I did consider having Stormy’s rage wind up causing Darcy’s death but the story would have been VERY different that way and it just didn’t fit for the story narrative (it would’ve been a beautiful, tragic narrative for the Trix, but they’re not the main characters so they weren’t the ones I wanted to explore in such a deeply traumatic way)

So, I chose Stormy to be the one to kick the bucket as a way of showing a self-fullfiling prophecy ala Haunting of Hill House, all along, she would be the cause of her own death and she had no idea.

[zeledonia]

alright ill not torment that artist's post with extended musings about ew! shinryu so here goes, i have some… thoughts?? about shinryu in ultima thule and about zenos' presence there and… all of that.

I thought Shinryu was really neat in Stormblood. The whole concept of this primal born from the rage and despair of a nation that was conquered and destroyed and plundered, and then having said primal also be subjugated by the conqueror. The cruelty of how even the manifestation of Ilberd's sacrifice was stolen to be used at the whim of the enemy. How slaying the primal at the end of StB allowed us to symbolically lay Ilberd's despair to rest - freeing Ala Mhigo in the same breath as freeing his legacy from the clutches of the empire.

And there's something to be said about how Shinryu was born from Nidhogg's eye - yet another character doomed through his bottomless rage at his loss. And how we use Omega to hunt the primal down - an omicron, conquerors and destroyers of the Dragonstar.

It was one of the parts of Stormblood that worked for me, and I wasn't fundamentally opposed to the idea itself that Zenos draws upon Shinryu's power once more in Endwalker, but… idk, I feel like I am interpreting more into it than the narrative ever intended me to?

I feel like there's a lot you could read into the scene, and how it delivers proof that Zenos is hitting a fundamental limit to his character. But when i look at the way the game plays the scene out, it feels like I'm just too generous about it idk.

So like. Zenos spends most of EW chasing after the WoL and trying to get them to fight him again, blatantly admitting that he is trying to cause you as much rage and despair as possible, because he believes this to be the way to unlock your full potential against him.

He says it on several occasions. Tells you during the dinner that the final days are a gift to you. Tells you on the moon that he intends to see you consumed with hatred and despair.

And of course, during the aftermath of Alisaie's scolding when he's ruminating in the menagerie, he supposedly realizes that he's been going about this all the wrong way. Both his motivations for seeking you out, and his methods. So he appears to you in the Ultimatum, as Shinryu, and claims he's got it sorted out now.

But does he?? At the end of the universe, he tracks you down in the shape of a primal born from despair - a primal he effectively stole from his enemy-, born of feelings that never belonged to him in the first place. A feat he was only capable of by stealing the Echo from Krile, because Hydaelyn's blessing was never his to begin with either. And of course, he gets to this point by consuming what remains of Hydaelyn's aether, too. And then he fights you as a Reaper, and in post-EW we find out that even this power was stolen - Zero tells you she had no choice. She tells you (if your character unlocked Reaper) that your pact with your avatar is equal, but hers with Zenos was not.

Zenos never had the ability to reach Ultima Thule through his own merits, he still fell short of achieving what the Warrior of Light achieved. Where we make it to Meteion's nest by understanding despair, and overcoming it through hope that was created by understanding, such a path would have been barred to Zenos.

I was kind of disappointed that our dialogue options upon his arrival were just variations of "lol I won't save you", when really i wish the game had let me acknowledge how fucking wild it is that Zenos shows up in the despair realm, dressed up as the rage and despair primal, looks at the WoL and goes "lmao are you gonna fall to despair???".

I think it says a LOT about his character. He's had a good long thinking session about his issues, and made a commendable effort. But he still doesn't grasp the nature of despair, positions himself (and wants to position the WoL) as someone who cannot be affected by "such a banal thing", and… well, he dies.

The Warrior of Light understands despair and has the power to turn it into hope, and it saves the world and shows Meteion that it isn't the end. But it is the end for Zenos, because ultimately he doesn't understand how to create hope. He has harnessed a collection of powers he fundamentally does not understand, used them to speedrun the road to Ultima Thule, brute forced his way into the Ultimatum, and never walked the path that gave the WoL the strength to make it out of this ordeal alive. But the way it plays out ingame, it feels. Too triumphant? It's practically his big moment - he shows up to save the day in his own way, he's your reliable flying platform for the whole fight, and…. I don't know what I expected, but it feels like the game simply does not address a single implication of his choice to take Shinryu's shape again.

Maybe what I was missing was something, a tiny thing, during the battle? There's a moment in the battle where the WoL falters, and the scions are giving us strength. But I wish Zenos had faltered, too. I wish there had been a consequence, however brief, to him harnessing the power of a primal he never had a true connection with.

In the same way he got punished in Stormblood for stealing the Echo (by being brought back to life), I wish he'd gotten punished for using Shinryu, too. Maybe I would have liked it if the scions had saved us JUST in time because despair-driven Shinryu could not withstand the Endsinger's attacks any longer. What if we fell? What if Zenos' mockery of the Endsinger as "weak prey" was punished, and he found out that he does not have what it takes to conquer despair, because he was so detached from the majority of human emotion.

I feel like there's something missing from Shinryu's appearance in Endwalker that ties it back into what happened during Stormblood - Zenos forcibly taking control of this massively powerful primal, but losing.

I think if we'd gotten something, anything acknowledging how at the end of the road, he had still not managed to bring anything of his own to the table, I think it would have been such a good demonstration of why he died that day, and why we did not have the chance to save him.

Something about how he forged an empty existence for himself, and all his stolen power was indeed a sad, sad mirror to the strength the WoL gains from their genuine bonds with their friends, who lend it to the Warrior willingly. (Also something something limit break happening because it's the battle with you, the only person he does have a genuine connection with that he can draw true power from.) (Okay yeah that bit is very self indulgent)

[chainslobber]

i really love basically everything you do with chisaki.... when you draw him with aizawa or eri or dabi or anyone i love the dynamics. how do you lug your brain around with so many good ideas in it does it never get heavy.....

Hello there!

He's my second favorite character, and he had so much potential. Now that his story is done and I was left with JUST enough puzzle pieces for my grubby paws, I decided to just go ham with him. Mayeb not make him 'happy' per se but anything was better than what we got. Because unlike most, I don't see just a villain. I see everything he could've been, I see the personality, and I see where he fits perfectly.

As a Dabihaul, that's easy. There's so much. You got the power dynamics, you got the master/servant, you got the doomed yaoi, you got the canon narrative where, if you wanted, could be the best damn betrayal AU of your life.

For Eri, I think it's a little bit of a weird place because even though I see them as 'tolerable' of each other's presences, it depends on the AU. For Plague AU, he gives her up when he realizes her worth because he knows that no matter what, she'll be hunted down. It's to save her. But for something like my CWS fic, she's still around him but in a more estranged family kinda way. She doesn't need to be supervised around him, but she is, and he's fine with it.

And for Aizawa, that's just my own special hell. People have definitely been vocal about how evil I've been slapping them together--mainly because of Eri--and they don't like to separate her from Kai. If the fandom did that, I think we'd all be happier/smarter but alas lol. To be honest, shipping has always been fast and loose with me. It's just difficult with Kai since I don't see him as a romantic/dating type, so at least with kaizawa it's more like 'being alone together', whereas with Dabi it's 'you're annoying; if we have sex will you shut up?' type deal.

But I'm rambling. I'm actually pretty stupid, I've just learned that people will always hate what I do when it comes to him so I may as well have fun while the fandom is slowly petering out. I'm here forever.

[murfpersonalblog]

Claudia's Celebration of Life: Spark in the Dark - The Actress (Delainey)

As the title suggests, this event is to celebrate the wonderful Claudia; her personality, her aspirations, her journey. The heart for the past two seasons of AMC Interview with The Vampire. This is to take the narrative back to her, proving she's not just a shingle roof for us. 10. Aug 29th & 30th: The Actress (Delainey Hayles)

All of our different Claudias over the decades are iconic; she's a goated character, no matter what. But I absolutely love Delainey.

Claudia in S2 was a completely different beast; and just SO good to follow as she inevitably careened towards her inevitable doom. U_U Delainey perfectly delivered the raw pain Claudia was going through, not just in Paris, but her entire life:

Her frustration was palpable, trapped in her underdeveloped body, and how everyone infantalized her; to her resentment towards Louis and the "stormy romance of YOU TWO!," just sick & effing tired of Loustat & and the mess they put her in by making her. (It's not that she should've never been born--"you are a mistake!"--it's that LOUSTAT should've never raised her; they were unworthy of HER, not the other way around. 😤)

Ofc, Louis (& Jonah) going to Europe is a nod to the IRL Black Exodus of African Americans fleeing the racist homophobic "land of the free" and settling in France, etc. where it was (relatively) safer. But we don't talk enough about Claudia's racial perspective, and how Europe was idealized in HER head.

Her life in America was awful, rock bottom, and she thought it just HAD to be better overseas; that nothing & no one could be worse than "Lestat, Antoinette, the motherf***er, and YOU!" Life has never been easy for her; and she got NOTHING out of vampirism.

Even as a high-yellow racially ambiguous Black girl, Bailey's Claudia was STILL subjected to a barrage of racism in Jim Crow America (2 incidents with white cops calling her a devil & busting into her room on some Breonna Taylor mess; the racist white wenches calling her a "Darkie;" the other racist white wench calling her a "Swamp" Thing; letterman jacket George Zimmerman who wouldn't let her in the college; Bruce raping her after macroaggressively telling her to read a book about (white woman) etiquette; and Tom Anderson's "two-toned daddies" jibe at her being mixed-race). And ofc, her remarks that she & Lou are Massa Lestat's "slaves."

Delainey's Claudia in S2 is VERY candid about race & colorism. She's hyperaware of Louis' privilege as a lighter-skinned Creole Black man, now that both she AND Armand are darker-skinned than Louis/JA, (since she's not being played by a lightskinned actress anymore).

I was SO glad she said that. Cuz it points directly to her naivety & desperate hope that skinship = kinship. She thought leaving America meant leaving Bruce/Lestat/abuse/racism behind.

Alas, she swiftly got her Negro-wakeup-call in Europe; as German Nazis & Ukranian/Russian Soviets were barring Black people entry at every checkpoint; and Romanian white kids rudely poked her face, calling her a "cioara/crow" (Romania's N-word for dark-skinned foreigners X X).

Then Claudia & Louis get to Paris (a historical oasis for Black folk fleeing American racism). She hoped/assumed that the racially diverse Theatre coven led by a dark-skinned brown Coven Master meant that she & Lou would be safer & treated better there than they were in Lestat's coven--and America by extension.

So much focus has gone towards Louis' treatment in Trial, and Santiago & Armand's machinations against him; but we don't talk enough about poor Claudia's treatment, and the overtly racist way they treated her as well. She got her ultimate Negro-wakeup-call when the Theatre killed her in front of a laughing live audience, just like white Americans at Black lynchings.

“We got out and walked down the road, and we found a bunch of white men, women and children. There was no sign of terror in their faces. There was nothing but giggles and laughter as the blood dripped from the nose and from the bullet-riddled body of the victim." (Jim Crow Museum, Lynching Picnics)

I've seen dumb AF takes that the Trial wasn't about race, cuz there's Planche, Armand, Tuan & Quang Pham--1 Black man & 3 Asians. But being racially diverse doesn't make it NOT racist, LOL. "I'm not racist, I have 3 Bipoc friends~! This company's not racist, we hired 2 Bipocs! This country's not racist, we have a half-Black president!" 🙄 Euro-America's racist AF, and they've got PLENTY of minorities. Just look at the UK riots that've been happening all summer, DUH!

Regardless of how many Bipocs are in the coven, it's Black people who're still the ones being exploited & oppressed (Baby Lou Lou), and the ones Santiago wanted dead the most (Claudia & Louis). Lestat openly admitted to breaking Rule #2 and that he should be punished too, but they told him to STFU & stick to the script--STAY ON CODE, and reap the benefits of white privilege. (ONLY Madeleine was offered a get-out-of-jail seat in the coven. But when she rejected Santiago's coven & proudly declared "My coven is Claudia," she got the "Race Traitor" treatment when she chose to die with her Black lover--as we've seen historically (X X X) and even currently.)

(Also, your own people can betray you & sell you out, just to please white folk on the winning side. Planche was giddy as he stuffed Louis in that vault & carved his name on the door--why would he--the token Negro--go against the coven? 🙄😒)

As dark-skinned as he is, Armand never GAF about Claudia, "tell her she's beautiful." The coven painted Lou as a Black thug & sexual predator, but they depicted Claudia as a hideous MONSTER:

"You ain't a girl, you a DEVIL!"

Tuan drew her that way, but ARMAND told Tuan what to draw, to make Louis & Claudia look as BAD as possible: GUILTY! DEATH!

Armand never had an ounce of regard, respect, or faith in Claudia.

Armand's physical abuse stands out, too.

It was bad enough when Loustat did it in S1, but just look at this SIZE difference--how dang TINY Delainey is, compared to Assad! 😩

Look how much she had to struggle to drink from that dude at the mansion--she's barely tall enough to reach his neck with him leaning back! XD

(Claudia's so dang adorable--even when she's being a total terror, lol.)

Delainey's casting just nails it--she's so effing SMALL & baby-faced, but her voice is HUGE; she hollers up a storm every episode telling these dumb vamps off about themselves. She has a raspiness that IIRC Delainey herself said is supposed to sound like an old woman chainsmoking cigarettes, just fed up as no one picks her, loves her, or even believes her or believes in her: the sheer embodiment of being a Black woman in the Western world--Old (Europe) or New (America).

Delainey was amazing all season, doing all those languages, simping for the Theatre, singing & dancing, telling Louis like it is, being so sweet with Madeleine, and reliving the trauma of what Bruce did to her.

She didn't take Bailey's cold hard steel approach; sharp as the edge of Louis' blade; an impenetrable fortress so that Lestat can't see her vulnerability & crack/break her. Instead, Delainey's take was soft and warm. She's child-like in her naivety around the Theatre, and determination to see herself as one of them & conform, just as Louis had to conform his whole life in NOLA.

Ofc, she learns otherwise when they turned her into a minstrel show, and killed the joy out of her.

She gets hotter & hotter until she finally boils over. Delainey's my favorite during the Trial (Ep7's my fave episode in S2). The Trial's such a massive moment, and I was so hyped to finally see it on screen for the first time ever (the film skips it, and in the book it's short & choppy since Loustat were both falling in & out of consciousness and didn't really remember wtf had happened). My heart was in my effing stomach when she got up and started tearing Lestat a new arsehole.

Delainey 100% sold me on how much AGONY Claudia must've been in, on her feet like that, determined & STRONG enough to stand up and defend herself, since no one else would/could. I was right there with her the whole time, like wtf, ohhhh I was PIIIIIIISED.

And this LOOK she gave Lestat when she was done!?!

Tired, but resolute & SMUG/satisfied all in one. She purses her lips & raises her brow like: kiss my whole entire 14-year old Black arse; I did more in 2 minutes than you've done in 200 years, CLOWN.

Best thing he ever did for her was let her CURSE y'all! Enjoy being effing haunted in Season 3, Lestat! 😜👻👻👻

So I PRAY Rolin does justice to Delainey's Claudia in whatever S3 holds for her. I DEMAND to see ghost!Claudia come back with a vengeance! The queen said she has unfinished business! 👸🏾😈

[iasmelaion]

what happens when you listen to three audiobooks in like a week and a half

We've been at trial for like the past two weeks at work, which means I have been alone in the office, with approximately 2 hours worth of work to do every day max, mostly just there to answer frantic emails and texts about "what exhibit number is [vague and potentially inaccurate description of email or other document]?" and occasionally file supplemental trial briefs. Anyway, it's all up to the jury now! Only not now now because it is a court holiday and because this case lives to torment me and never ever ever finish ahahaha it's fine i'm fine, we better win.

Anyway, all of that is to say I was bored as hell so I decided to finally finish listening to the audiobook of Gideon the Ninth, which I had started listening to LAST FEBRUARY. You can perhaps guess that, as good as the audiobook narration was, I was not entirely feeling the book. Ahaha. Ha. I was already mentally writing my Goodreads review, complaining about how yes, the narrative voice is great, and yeah, the set up and genre mashup are fun (lesbian necromancers in space! country manor mystery! slasher horror!), but there's just not enough context and the worldbuilding is so vague and what are the overarching stakes even. And then the last 1/3 of the book happened, and I listened to all three current books in the series in like a week and a half and I have spent the last two days rotating these characters in my head and reading meta and such. Sorry in advance about how in approximately two weeks time, my queue will be full of TLT shit.

Spoilers and assorted jumbled reactions below, because I'm not about to ramble like this on goodreads. But real talk, I have skimmed so much spoilery talk/fan art/etc about these books and absolutely none of it made any sense at the time so tbh I don't think it matters all that much if you're spoiled. The spoilers won't even make any damn sense most of the time.

I wish I could give this series some kind of pitch that would, idk, explain it or make it seem enticing, but lol I have no idea where I'd even start. I'll just say that if you are in need of Enrichment in your Enclosure, these books are like being tossed a very meaty bone full of delicious marrow which you can gnaw upon for a good long while.

Gideon's narrative voice is a lot of fun, and I do quite enjoy how she's basically a big lesbian jock, even if that did make a lot of the first book rough going for me because alas, Gideon, bless her, is not interested in much beyond hot ladies, swords, staying alive, and getting off her home planet. And Harrow, of course.

HARROW. For 2/3 of the first book, Gideon hates her passionately, they've been enemies their entire lives, they are vicious and awful to each other. Now, I knew Gideon/Harrow was like THE ship for these books, and I was like "...hm. Listen, I simply do not vibe with this kind of enemyship." But then that last third happened, and auuughhhhh. They're enemies, they were all the other had, they were two rats trapped in a barrel, desperate to get out, clawing and biting and snarling and hurting each other, they were each other's only solace, they were doomed from the start. They've been trapped in a cycle of terrible violence, and I have no idea if they can ever get out. And the love Gideon wants from Harrow is to be used and consumed and destroyed by love, and the love Harrow wants to give is to save her and keep her even if it means forgetting her. Like, y'all, I ship it, but I have no idea how there's any kind of future in it.

And then Harrow the Ninth happened, and goddamn, poor fucking Harrow. I felt for her already after the revelation in Gideon the Ninth, but Harrow the Ninth made me so desperately sad for her.

Good job on the soup though, Harrow!

Also the low key comedy of all of them stuck with each other on the Mithraeum was *chef's kiss*. Just like THE most demented and toxic workplace sitcom while poor Harrow is descending into a total mental breakdown.

The worldbuilding is so fascinatingly, complicatedly BONKERS. Also it's so SPACE CATHOLICISM that I don't even know what to say about it. I'm not qualified. But like. It is. It's so Space Catholicism, but also make it More Goth. And it's clearly concerned with religion and faith and all that, but not in a Narnia kind of way, and I am FASCINATED about where it's all leading to.

What a fucking villain this series has in John Gaius aka God aka Necrolord Prime aka the Prince Undying aka the Emperor of the Nine Houses aka Jod. Just absolutely skin-crawlingly horrible, the literal Worst Person Who Ever Lived, even as he's affable and funny and occasionally endearing and pathetic. And like I'm not even sure all of that stuff is a mask or a cover for his monstrousness! Like I think he genuinely is affable and funny and endearing and pathetic! He is just also quite literally History's Greatest Monster. I'm not sure if he was always like this, though I'm leaning towards him having been an awful man before he became god, in all those quiet, too-easily unnoticed ways men are awful, the moment they have any power over someone. And then Jod gets all the power so of course his awfulness becomes correspondingly greater.

I will say though that Jod's origin story is an actual horror movie, the stuff of nightmares. It's the end of the world because climate change and he and his team are frantically working on some way to save everybody but it doesn't quite work, not well enough, and no one is listening to him, and the clock is ticking down and of course the billionaires have a way out, of course they're gonna get on some space ships and bounce, but what about everyone else? Jod is sure he can save everyone else, if only he had the resources, if only they'd listen to him. And someone was listening, it turns out. Someone--something gives him power. Terrible, terrible power over life and death. And he becomes something else and makes choice after terrible choice, enabled by his friends, and then whoops not whoops! He's killed everybody on the fucking planet and ate the sun and the whole solar system too!! Absolutely terrifying reveal, and it's built up to so well. We spend so much time listening to Jod and so much of what he says is reasonable or understandable, but every so often there's a hint that under his commendable politics and goals and general hapless nerd vibes, there's something else, something much, much worse.

Actually, this whole part would make a truly great horror movie, especially if it starts off as an almost dark comedy that shifts genres as it goes: from dark comedy to suspenseful thriller to eldritch horror.

Also he gets, like, super weird about the cadavers he's been experimenting on. Like, deeply, horrifying creepy and weird about them.

Lotta people get weird about corpses in this series, if I'm being honest.

CAMILLA AND PALAMEDES. I am UNWELL about these two. I am UNHINGED. I am still rotating them in my mind, unable to do much but WEEP. "So...do you ship them??" you might ask. To which I say idk and idc, what does to ship these two even MEAN at this point, they are platonic, they are romantic, they are eros, philia, AND agape, and they're the Love that Is Perfected in Death. The absolute fucking pinnacle of insane codependence. Childhood BFFs who crawled into each other's skins and hearts and souls and never crawled back out. How much more codependent is it possible to get? NONE. NONE MORE CODEPENDENT. They have MERGED THEIR SOULS AND BODIES TOGETHER INTO ONE BEING. [actually, real talk, i am uncertain of the Soul Situation, I am pretty sure they've merged their souls together, but like. idk. they do also say they will be known as themselves "beyond the River" after death] I am WEEPING just THINKING ABOUT IT. That is not fucking hyperbole btw, the mere thought of them basically makes me cry, it's fine, i'm fine. They love each other SO MUCH. I CANNOT HANDLE IT.

Anyway, rather difficult to "ship" a pairing that has become...one person. Like, still willing to make a game go of it even during the period where they're sharing a body, but like. Now they are one person??? Because this is not a Steven Universe-style fusion where Ruby and Sapphire can unfuse from Garnet, Camilla and Palamedes are now one person, no takebacks while they live. I do love Paul though! Fucking adore that some of Paul's first acts as a new person were acts of kindness and mercy. Jod's lyctors are called saints, but I think Paul is the only one who is a saint in truth.

So, a triumph or a tragedy or both that Camilla and Palamedes died to become Paul? Idk! I adored Camilla and Palamedes as individual characters, I adored how in many ways they're the certain, just moral center of this entire series, I love their intelligence and ferocity, and oh, after Nona the Ninth, I loved so much how they loved. Each other, and other people. I loved Camilla using truths like her swords, her dry humor, how she was still so kind even while being an absolute stone cold fucking badass. I loved Palamedes, his brilliance and how he bent basically all that brilliance into helping people. I loved so fucking much that he was the one who figured out that there was a better way to achieve lyctorhood than the way Jod and his lyctors set out for them. I loved that stuck in a bubble in the underworld, with nothing but a terrible erotic novel, he started having serious opinions about said erotic novel and undoubtedly wrote terrible fanfiction in his head about it.

Ahem. Anyway. Abigail Pent and Magnus Quinn were also delightful, and I was especially charmed by the lovely Welsh accents Moira Quirk gives them in the audiobook. Love that Abigail has immensely powerful, friendly mom friend energy while simultaneously being an immensely powerful Eldritch Speaker for the Dead. Gideon observing her all like "ah, her eye contact is...extremely very unsettlingly intense! but also she is wearing an apron and is cheerful so that's alright then."

God, this is really long, sorry to anyone who actually read it, possibly i will reblog with more disjointed thoughts.

[bylertruther]

the mistake & the monster, a willel character study

it's so fascinating how will and el's role reversal in the narrative reinforces their negative self-image and keeps them from moving forward in their own stories. they're both stuck in time, specifically the day that will went missing, just as the upside down is.

will being thoroughly replaced by eleven in every aspect and made a secondary character in his own life story serves to make him feel like a mistake.

here's someone that looks like him, joined his party and later his family, and has been given everything that was once his, including his own feelings and gifts for his best friend that he knew and loved first, that she wouldn't have ever even met if not for him and the love mike had for him, and who ruined his life and gave him unimaginable trauma, and... he can't even do anything about it. he doesn't even allow himself to be mad anymore—he seethes, and he aches, and then he bottles it back up and tells himself he deserves it.

because she's eleven. their new mage. the superhero. the girl that saved their lives over and over again. his sister and his friend and a member of the party. a person that he loves, would do anything for, and wants only to be happy. and who is he to be anything other than grateful?

she's the better, new and improved version of him; an upgrade that does the saving instead of needing to be saved. if he wasn't a mistake, then wouldn't it be him? wouldn't he be the first choice as he once was? or, even just a choice at all? if he, as he is now, wasn’t a mistake... then wouldn’t they have let him back into their lives? wouldn’t his own life have allowed that?

eleven being forced to fill the voids of various men, forced or guided into bringing their ghosts back to life so that they can rewrite their rotten histories, and doing their bidding in isolation serves to make her feel like a monster.

brenner could not let go of henry, and so he molded eleven in his image, made her look for him, trained her to beat and surpass him, kept her in isolation and reliant solely on him so that she would not turn on him as henry did, and reared her to be a success so great that it would wash away his failure with henry. hopper could not let go of sarah, and so he projected his fears and trauma onto her. of course, eleven is being sought after by the government, so the isolation is in part understandable, but it's still not an ideal situation for either of them. she was not ready to be a caged animal again, going stir crazy with no answers and nothing but her memories warped by time, nostalgia, and loneliness, and the television to keep her company. he was not ready to be a parent either. he was still grieving, unsure of how to actually raise her, and so scared to lose her that he drove her away. again, similar to brenner with henry, hopper was trying to balm his fears and perceived failure with her. eleven still didn't know what it was to be a person—someone that has friends, talks to people, and likes things; all very basic components of being a human in society—because he was treating her like sarah 2.0 and his mini-me in some ways. as for mike... mike wants to feel and be safe. safe from monsters, bullies, and societal pressures. eleven is the superhero that consistently swoops in to save him, his loved ones, and the entire world from doom. she's the force that kept troy from hurting him when he stood up for will and that caught him when he stepped off the cliff after troy and james told him to. she's also the first ever “girl that’s not grossed out by [him]". people see them, think that they like each other, and push him in her direction. alas, there's his chance to prove that he's normal! that he's not a loser or a freak! he can get girls and people clearly think that he likes them, too, judging by how they've confused his kindness, consideration, and friendship for something romantic. she's his lifeline, his path to "normalcy" and "manhood". as was the case with hopper, this is a layered dynamic. they meet and bond due to trauma. mike finds her while looking for will and frequently says, in less affectionate words like "weapon", that they need her to accomplish their mission. they undoubtedly bond a bit in the few days that they know each other, but mike finds and keeps her because he wants will back and she's the only way to save him. at the end of season one, mike tells her that she can be his sister "once all this is over and will's back". it's only when she questions him on this, and thus reminds him of what everyone else has been saying, that he quickly backtracks. he can't explain romance to her, but he goes back to that role anyway, asks her to the snow ball, and kisses her. because, oh, right! everyone says that i like her, so clearly i do! nevermind the fact that when he's speaking uninhibitedly with her about their future, he describes a more familial relation and that he's been playing caregiver to her all season. and then... after promising her a family and a date, he watches her save their lives again and be terribly weakened by it, only to later get up to defend them from a big scary monster. then, when he steps forward to stop her, he watches her push him back and "die" saving their lives. mike is terrified of losing people. he's pressured by his family to grow up and be a man. he feels a personal responsibility to save everyone, despite being just a kid himself. he also feels that he's nothing special, just a random nerd that got lucky. eleven frees him from all of this. she's his "cure" and his "superman". it is a disservice to both of their characters to not acknowledge this and saying it doesn't detract from their relationship or how they feel about each other. it's just... what it is. eleven ticks all of his boxes: she's a savior, she makes him special, and she's proof that he's grown up. he doesn't want to lose her for a multitude of reasons, even if neither of them can or have given each other what they want and need. mike still views her as the girl he met in the woods and wants their relationship to remain as it was during those few days. eleven doesn't want this. she's outgrown that girl. she doesn't need him and she doesn't want to be seen through that lens anymore. she wants him to see her as she is now and love her for it. but... he doesn't, does he? he can't. he can't write it to her, he can't give her a card with those words on it, and he hasn't ever said it—not even when she sobs and begs him to. he doesn't, he can't, and he refuses to lie to her (until they believe that her life and the fate of the world literally depends on it).

mike's actions are not malicious. he can't help the way that he feels. he doesn't want to hurt her, but is in a position where he has no choice. no matter what he does, it'll hurt them both. it is hurting them both. and that's what makes this relationship particularly special: that they were both pushed into this, and that they are both aware that she cannot fill his void nor can he fill hers.

and so they are stuck hurting themselves and will, because unlike the other situations, this ghost is not a ghost. will is alive and well and actively wants his part in this story back.

having been removed from their triangle of lies, it seems that eleven is in a better place than them at the end of season four. she's gone on a journey and made steps; steps that seemingly lead her away from mike and the endless roles she's been thrust into, and into whoever it is that she is.

once the painting lie is revealed, i reckon it may even be the catalyst that slides everything into place for them all: that it was never meant to be her by mike's side, but will. (among other revelations, of course.)

there's a lot yet to resolve, but it seems that season five will help both will and eleven find their personhood.

eleven will know that she is more than what little the men before her have believed and shaped her to be, that she can be more than their ghosts and their failures, that she is a person worth knowing and loving all on her own, and that she is more than her might.

will will know that he is no mistake, that he does have a place in this world, that he isn't a burden to the ones he loves, that he has not been forgotten by them, that there is love for him worth fighting for, and that he is worthy and deserving just as he is and has always been.

their stories are about discovery and coming into one's own, and they cannot be decoupled. it's no mistake that as will begins to be more open about his feelings for mike and nears the role he once had in his life, that eleven begins to grow away from him and find herself. they're two sides of the same coin, twins that have been distorted by outside forces to fit into their false narratives.

that's what makes will feel like a mistake and what makes eleven feel like a monster, and it won't stop until they manage to break the cycle by saying "no".

no, i won't turn the other cheek and bite my tongue.

no, i won't be what you tell me to be.  

[tortoisesshells]

top five doomed mariners go

in order not of significance, but of encounter:

(1) William Bush - the original Doomed Mariner, my copy of Lord Hornblower is still held together with duct tape from chucking the book across the room when I realized Forester was not going to pull a "if there's no body he's not dead" - rather, "if there's no body, it's because he was too close to the ignition point." A character whose defining trait is his devotion is actually something that can be so personal.

(2) James Norrington - the man, the myth, the legend. clearly takes up too much brain space for a [checking notes for comedic effect] antagonist secondary character from a twenty-year-old theme park ride movie. Hard to say at which point it became clear he'd never survive, but there's definitely a point at which he clearly thinks he's survived too long for anyone's good, least of all his own.

(3) Mr. Starbuck

“On this level, Ahab’s hammock swings within; his head this way. A touch, and Starbuck may survive to hug his wife and child again.—Oh Mary! Mary!—boy! boy! boy!—But if I wake thee not to death, old man, who can tell to what unsounded deeps Starbuck’s body this day week may sink, with all the crew! Great God, where art Thou? Shall I? shall I?—The wind has gone down and shifted, sir; the fore and main topsails are reefed and set; she heads her course.” “Stern all! Oh Moby Dick, I clutch thy heart at last!” Such were the sounds that now came hurtling from out the old man’s tormented sleep, as if Starbuck’s voice had caused the long dumb dream to speak. The yet levelled musket shook like a drunkard’s arm against the panel; Starbuck seemed wrestling with an angel; but turning from the door, he placed the death-tube in its rack, and left the place. (123: The Musket)

(4) Eyk Larsen - doomed by Netflix more than his own foibles, though that's not for lack of trying on his foibles' part. Even the men on his crew that like him are waiting for him to snap under the strain of his bereavement, alcoholism, and the demands of the new shipping company's changes (and the sudden appearance/disappearance of a ghost ship. and inexplicable deaths. and seeing things. and and and). Doesn't make it three whole scenes before staring moodily into the deeps of the Atlantic, musing on the impossibility of knowing what lives on the floor thousands of feet below. Kind of deserved that mutiny. Didn't exactly die in 1899, but. Well. Like his relationship with Maura, it was complicated.

(5) Bill Malloy - He never learned how to swim, he put together The Big Secret about the manslaughter trial quicker than any other uninvolved character, he's been in love with and trailing a respectful step behind Liz Collins Stoddard for 20+ years to no avail (but, hey, Carolyn says he's as good as her father, which?), and he's not the most helpful ghost but he is having a little too much fun getting revenge for his murder - did we ever hear him laugh when he was alive? I suppose we have to subtract some points for him never spending any time on a boat within the scope of the narrative, but then, he IS trying to go back to his job on the boats - and no one else on this list sings "What Do You Do With A Drunken Sailor?". I'm pretty sure the narrative is through with him now, alas. He'll always be famous to me.

[izar-tarazed]

What kind of tragedy are you?

Izar: doomed from the start

there was no way of winning, and you knew it too. but you still tried. you tried again and again and again to change it. you fought tooth and claw to change your fate, but she cannot be easily manipulated. it’s not your fault. the game was always rigged against you. from the moment you entered the narrative, your fate was sealed. you didn’t stand a chance.

Ensha: wrong place, wrong time it shouldn’t have been you. oh my love, you should have lived. if only. if only you had made a right instead of a left. if only your friend hadn’t had so much to drink. if only it hadn’t rained last night. then everything would be fine. a butterfly could have flapped its wings at another time and you would have have been fine. safety was so close, and yet so far. but alas, the stars just had to align.

(Love how both results are somewhat fitting! As a Tarnished, of course Izar "tried again and again and again". Fate sealed from the moment she entered the narrative; doomed to either continue along a path not wholly hers, or lose the grace and everything, both times without fulfilling the purpose she wished for. And while Ensha's "wrong place, wrong time" is fitting too, I still can't stop laughing about it. Yes, Ensha, if only you hadn't been in the Roundtable Hold and decided to go after that particular Tarnished! You could have stayed right next to the study door, but NO. (I think it's somewhat fitting for my canon-divergent Ensha who survived the ambush, too, but still.) Tagged by @necrophcge; tagging no one in particular, go ahead and do this for your OCs if you want to! Feel free to tag me so I see it. :)

[locke-esque-monster]

Miscellaneous (and by no means comprehensive) thoughts on Daryl Dixon tv show

The English major in me loves the narrative symmetry in making Daryl cut off the hand of someone who is a semi-redeemable dick after giving Rick so much shit about putting Merle in that position in season 1.

Likewise for whatever is happening with the symbolism of Daryl using the flag to kill a zombie. Or him fighting his way off the beaches of France as a reverse of his grandfather.

Did I almost instantly figure out that guy dying on the beach was an ancestor on Daryl's? Yes. But subtle storytelling has never been this universe's forte.

Good Lord, the abundance of religious imagery in this show. I don't hate it... but Jesus Christ (I'm referring to the exclamation - not who Laurent is the least subtle stand-in for him).

Ah, so apparently even in France they don't have haircuts in the apocalypse. Clearly the only people who knew how to give a haircut lived in Alexandria (Jessie, Enid), and now they're dead we're forever doomed to shaggy-haired children and trying to peer through a curtain of hair to read Daryl's expression. How the hell does anyone fight a zombie with all that hair in their face, and no hair ties? Or are the men like, incapable of cutting their hair without a woman handling it?

We need more fighting nuns on tv shows.

I have been inordinately stressed every time I see Carol's knife get left somewhere in France. I'm starting to wonder if it returns to your pocket ala Riptide from the Percy Jackson books.

I don't hate the possibility of Daryl/Isabelle the show is dancing around. It's like Daryl/Connie - it's got a solid foundation, I can see why someone would ship it and I respect that. But it's not the ship of my heart I'm (clownishly) holding out hope for - Daryl/Carol.

I love how TWD gave the remaining episodes of the last season a single "fuck" per episode and now Daryl can just sprinkle them into his conversation at will. It feels like justice or recompense for every character who should have always been saying "fuck" at will on tv (looking at you Dean Winchester).

Carol, my queen, my inspiration, my favorite morally gray woman on tv - God, I've really missed you.

Second to that, I've missed the hell out of that pixie cut from peak Carol era. Carol knows exactly what haircut is practical on a mission.

For all that I heard about a twist, all I could figure during the radio call was Rick or Michonne was coming back. Or even that broken-up line was a trick, and Carol was just asking Daryl to come back safely. Maybe the phone call was a set-up for a reunion of Daryl & Carol in the finale. It wasn't until the car chase and right around where it stopped did it snap into my head that no one was getting out of that car but Carol. Bless whoever did something to ensure Carol got her proper ending. She never would have let Daryl go off on all these adventures that long, or alone, without looking for him.

I can't help but wonder what Carol in France would have entailed and how the story would have played differently. How would she have dealt with her relapsed Christianity? Or addressing any history she may have with France (aspirations to go there, history with Ed's family likely being French with that last name)? Or was the story always meant to split them up?

That said, if I can't have a Daryl and Carol together show (because oh my god, they would have to avoid them talking about their feelings too much and they have decided to avoid this by separation), I will certainly take a whole season of Carol. Give me all of the Carol.

[calamari-minecraft-corner]

I don't have an ao3 account currently so I can't comment on the new penpal chapter but I just want you to know how absolutely feral I am going about it. It is delicious. Fucking "so wren how do you want to die" I am giggling and kicking my feet as well as screaming in angst and amazement.

Penpal!Dream is probably my favorite Dream I have ever read. I am actually feral about him I swear. I want to put him in a snow globe and shake him. He is my precious baby girl.

And Wren omg Wren, precious baby girl in an entirely different way. I love her so much. Girl got angst and I honestly maybe would die for her. I feel so bad for her though girl was getting by then some god decided to make her text an unhinged sheep boy, and it devolved into actual nightmare fuel. I now hate centipedes, thanks.

I'm sorry this is so unhinged but I need to put the unhingedness somewhere. Your writing is just so delicious and good it makes me unhinged about it.

On a more sane note, I hope you're doing well :)

I have been reading this ask for five minutes I’m so happy you love Penpal!

And i honestly love writing Penpal!Dream and his dynamic with Wren so much— he is an absolute unhinged sheep man and just needs loads of therapy, especially since it’s hard for him to know what he’s doing is inherently wrong or not because in his eyes he thinks what he’s doing is the best course of action.

And Wren I just- I just love writing her but she makes me so sad. Literally doomed by the narrative and roped into this mess that she really can’t escape from now, and the next few chapters will get into more of how she’s dealing with this while she’s going through another version of hell.

The next few chapters I’m really excited to write for but I’m also terrified since it’s going to be really dark and fucked up, probably the same level as the centipede scene if I’m being honest but in a different regard. I’m gonna add a warning in my notes though for it just in case when I do write the next chapter.

And also thank you for enjoying my writing! I’ve been having a hard time lately trying to fully enjoy it but the past week Penpal has been getting an influx of love and it makes me happy :) and I’m also doing well, just going through work. Hopefully I’ll get to work on it next chapter in the next few days— I miss when I was able to just write through chapters and update them weekly but alas, work and creativity be damned.

Also you can ALWAYS be unhinged in my ask box about Penpal or any other AU, it makes me so fucking happy and I’m always glad to answer questions without spoiling stuff 💖

[jaggedcliffs]

So I’ve finally finished Dan Simmon’s The Terror (2007). The fact that it took me a month, rather than a less than two week, should give a quick preview to my feelings.

Stuff that’s Good Actually:

The Goodsir, Pelgar, Bridgen, and Blanky chapters

I love the depth and the history of Pelgar and Bridgen’s relationship (which, in the series, for me was unfortunately hampered by the fact that I couldn’t recognize Pelgar since he was just another brown-haired white guy)

The Blanky chapters are wild, as expected

While the Goodsir chapters have neither the tenderness of Pelgar/Bridgen, nor the excitement of Blanky, they were still a nice break from everyone else’s POV

While they’re stuck on the boat in the first two thirds of the book, it’s a slog to get through. However! the slog across King William’s (Is)land is comparatively very engaging

It’s really effective at conveying the exhaustion of boat trek in a way that the series can’t get across (and why I also think it’s a good idea they didn’t try to)

Similarly, the effects of scurvy and the other mysterious poisoning from the tins (I think botulism?) are horrifying in a way that can’t really be conveyed on screen

Like, the detailed description of FItzjames’ slow, agonizing death...it makes you appreciate his death in the show, and not just because of the homoeroticism.

JOPSON!!! 

(Jopson dies almost the same way as in the series, but it’s still painful. and it was his birthday....)

It’s also kind of funny how Tuunbaq starts to eat Hickey’s soul, then immediately regrets it because Tuunbaq’s body is temple and he has standards. 

In the trek across King William’s (Is)land and across the straight that leads to the Back River, there’s this terrible sense of hope. Maybe, maybe, maybe they just might make it. In the series, they’re barely even that much into their trek when it becomes obvious that they’re doomed (which I also quite enjoy). But they make it far enough in the book that, even though you know they don’t make it, they might. They might.

(They won’t)

The Rest:

If a woman appears, 9/10 times she’ll have her titties out

Silna gets naked in pretty much every single chapter she appears in

The Platypus Pond chapter exists.

The first two thirds of the book is, again, a slog. So many POVs that are just so hard to get through

Book!Irving is a fuckboy. And has many POV chapters

I wanted Hickey to kill Irving in Hickey’s first POV chapter just so I wouldn’t have to read any more fucking Irving chapters. Alas, Irving dies at the same time, place, and way that he does in the show

There is...a lot about boats.

The problem is just that it’s not well written at times. Mainly -- though not always -- because Dan Simmons is so focused on showing off research that he sometimes forgets to write a narrative

In the first chapter, Crozier sees that Hickey is out on deck, then goes on a spiel about how he can recognize the men despite the fact that they’re so bundled up that they don’t have any recognizable features -- like some have scarves from home and the like. But he doesn’t say why Hickey is recognizable. Hickey, while not as important as in the series, is still pretty major here. And what is noticeable about his way of dress might, for example, say something about his character. Maybe there’s a lack of clothing from a loved one, because he’s an asshole.

If Crozier tells us in detail why the topmasts are down in winter, then Blanky doesn’t need to tell us the exact same thing, in detail, several chapters later. Either put it in Blanky’s chapter, where it’s narratively relevant, or put it in Crozier’s chapter as exposition with only a quick reminder in Blanky’s because Blanky is currently getting chased by Tuunbaq so it’s better not to interrupt the action

Crozier’s stupid fever dream chapter where he tells us in exact detail what the rescue effort will be like -- including the names of ships, which country they’re from, which islands they’ll search, etc.. That’s not narrative, that’s research. Make it more fever-dream-ish and make it weirder and vaguer! Or put in a POV character from back in England like the show! Or put it in your endnotes! Incorporate research in a way that doesn’t sound like a history text, or just write a research book and not a novel

(and etc. -_-)

I don’t know what the fuck was up with the dead body with the rat teeth or whatever in Terror so Crozier has to burn the ship down (the irony is that in real life, the Terror is so well preserved that Parks Canada is letting it be for now to focus on Erebus.)

In the last 150 pages or so, it includes some good reflections from Crozier on the way he’s treated women, the folly of the British Empire, colonialism, and even a glimpse into the future of the ruin of global warming on the north. It’s also obvious that Simmons did a lot of research into Inuit ways of life, as well as some mythology. And we finally get a better sense of Silna as a character as well as her voice, in a way. But it’s all still told through Crozier. Like, the stories of Inuit mythology that Crozier dreams come through Silna, yes, but they’re still filtered through Crozier’s POV. And Silna is still so much presented as this exotic other throughout the book, not just because she doesn’t have a tongue, but because she’s also always described as not reacting to anything. As just constantly staring unblinkingly. Even while getting naked. She only gets with Crozier because, in the book, they both have second sight and she needs babies with second sight...yet she’s also so devoted to Crozier that she’d apparently follow him to England or America. And it’s frustrating, because while we finally get a hint of her personality,  it doesn’t do enough undo her presentation in the rest of book, or even a lot of the final portion.

[frozenambiguity]

continued from here | @poswiecenia.

Heavy is the weight of the responsibilities bestowed upon the man. Run away no longer he does, though the girl's interpretation of events matters little to him. He holds a compromise towards many — that much is true —, regardless of how unwillingly concerted it might have been. A constant reminder from another is not necessary. Too many nights have gone sleepless for that duty to not be engraved in his mind and bones.

Alas (for her, perhaps), amidst all schemes and contrived plots to achieve turbulent goals, it is he who wears the crooked crown of a broken nation. Placed 'pon his head, it may at times glisten no longer, shimmer dimming by momentary hesitation and concern over those who have nothing to do with the events, yet seem to be dragged into this mess altogether. 

Two people, connected by the roots of a destroyed nation, want to see it restored. However, they differ in approaches. Motivations. Little does she know that he has gained strength. Matured with age. To the point where he wishes to bend fate with his own hands. No longer is he part of a doomed narrative, one he told himself over and over for so many years. 

«We are not allies. You'd do well to remember that». Voice is frigid, much like the sharp look in his gaze. There is no room for opinions to modify, unless she offers an irrefutable explanation or deal. Even then, perhaps he is willing to sacrifice it all. It is time to see his own plans blossom, without the interference of another.

«I will not have a nation rebuilt on blood and ash».

[worldussysblog]

"Sanctuary in the Pages: Mira's Journey Between Worlds"

"A Short narrative story about a girl who does her best to escape the harsh reality through reading books"

Made by:worldussysblog and Htsbr25

Mira was curled up on her bed , the world outside her room was a distant hum. On her lap rests her favorite book that she often used to escape the harsh reality , the scent of an aged paper and it's ink had filled the air inside her small room. As she flipped through the pages of the book , she had found solace in the stories that had fueled her imaginations further more. Through reading stories , she was not Mira , the girl who often woke up with an impending doom , worrying too much and who has a little hope in life, rather she was Mira — a brave heroine , who fought dragons , sailing across the seven seas and discovering more strange hidden worlds.

The more she kept on reading , the more the lines and barriers between reality and fantasy collide and soon fades on the background— as she was too immerse on the story she was reading. Her dull eyes and the ache she felt on her heart each day on her life faded with each turn of the page, it was replaced by the vivid colors of far-away lands and the warmth and affections of the characters who understood her in the ways no one ever could— Not even her own parents . Here, she was strong , brave , loved by many and mostly importantly, here she felt safe.

Alas , all good things had come to an end , as Mira neared the last page of the book , a cold dread crept in and the dull ache on her heart had slowly return. She knew ,she would have to close the book soon and return to the harsh world she had desperately tried to escape. But for now, she had clung to the empty words , letting them be her refuge , her escape from a reality too hard to face.

The word "Mira" means Mirror in Japanese but in terms of name , it meant "Beautiful , Female Ruler, admirable , peace and Ocean". I named the character Mira because in mirror we could see our reflection therefore the character "Mira" in the story could also mean us or our reflection — especially if you could relate to her.

[some-old-psyker]

Rogue Trader CRPG AU

*Definitely a shoo-in for Iconoclastic/Dogmatic conviction*

*Probably worked for an Inquisitor of the Recongregator creed for a while in her youth*

*Sanctioned psyker but not a perpetual*

“Let the servant speak please”

*Regularly conducts small social experiments on the companions to see how they react to certain minor acts, such as being offered an unopened pack of fruit snacks. If she recruits Marazhai he is certainly not safe from this.*

*Probably with Heinrix in spite of her better judgment (he ends up being a sweetheart damnit). Possibly trying to break down Yrliet’s walls too.*

“No Cassia you may not cut out the servant’s tongues”

*Definitely sympathizes with Idira a bit and tries to help her break out of her Doomed By The Narrative arc. Alas, she probably won’t succeed*

“Abelard? Get his ass.”