#aggressively cishet

[dangerous-fighter-fairy]

I’ve seen a few too many people say Robert Jordan can’t write women. On the surface, it would seem like that, what with all of the mentions of their boobs and the constant men vs women nonsense going on. I understand how people would get that impression

But he actually CAN write women, and compared to other classic male fantasy authors, he writes them VERY WELL. The average women in WoT has equal power to the average man: women own businesses, give orders, rule countries, pursue men they like, and some people even think the Aes Sedai secretly puppet the world. That theory isn’t scary because they’re women, it’s scary because they’re magical. The only thing that would prevent a woman from doing certain things are rank and societal roles, which would equally prevent men from doing certain other things. For example, women are not expected to join armies (the Aiel are seen as strange for letting women fight) however all of Andor would riot if it had a king because “we’ve always had a queen! We’re Andor!” While there’s still a gender divide, it’s not inequality, it’s just the world’s societal expectations (which vary depending on where you are). Rand and Tam are never mocked for doing “women’s work” just because Kari is dead, it’s just a part of their life since she’s not around to do the “female housework” and they don’t have an issue changing things to accommodate their situation.

Another thing is that women aren’t shamed for their sexualities in this world unless they’re being socially inappropriate (like feeling someone up in the middle of a market) making someone uncomfortable with it (like not taking “no” for an answer). Otherwise, you get a few comments from the men along the lines of “aren’t I supposed to be chasing you?” but it’s not seen as crazy that a woman would do that or even want to do that; it’s just a little role reversal that takes the men by surprise. In fact, Faile does this often with Perrin once they’re married, she makes comments about how excited she is to fuck him and the only reason she’s stopped from saying that is if they get interrupted or if it’s the wrong time. Otherwise, his response is “good idea, let’s go.”

HOWEVER, all of RJ’s characters (the men too) are steeped in several hundred levels of kindergarten level men vs women gender bullshit to the point where it SOUNDS like traditional misogyny, but in reality it’s not. Everyone is equally annoying about gender stuff. They’re all humans, no one dimensional feminine objects here. They’re just very loud about the world’s gender divide

[t4tails]

ive been so deprived of any kind of queer content or subtext that lore olympus has me thinking "damnn maybe hermes and thanatos should kiss" with panels like these 😩

[sannin-three]

Okay but imagine Orochimaru and Tsunade finally managing to coax Jiraiya into exploring life outside of his bizarre cishet bubble.

Jiraiya: No way am I trying on that girly crap, I'd look awful!

Orochimaru: Is that what's holding you back? The fear that you might not look as pretty as you want to?

Jiraiya: ....oh 😳

[thasminlove]

Having the doctor being allowed to rest, being allowed to heal, being allowed to be part of their best friend’s family, be an aunt/uncle* to Rose, and have joy and peace in their life without being as afraid of losing it, after all they’ve been through, is everything to me. It also allows Ncuti’s Doctor to heal and have more joy and love in their life, whilst still recognising and carrying that loss.

*I can’t remember the gender neutral term atm sorry. Yes I am nonbinary lmao.

[gaylactic-fire]

Ngl, part of what put me completely off miphlink was the fans (especially the conservative tradcath ones) obsession with werid hybrid babies... it kind of put me off the zora forever with THAT image

I'm not into Miphlink at all they're doing what?? 😭

[queers4years]

I just keep thinking about august when I had 2 nonbinary kids talking to me about how scared they were. One told me she might have to go back into the closet for safety.

[avenin7]

in your AU Link and Revali would ever adopt a child?

they canonically have a daughter after the main story!! though she is their bio kid and not adopted :)

[ikjun]

we should start oppressing cishets if i have to see one more couple aggressively make out in front of me either on the bus or at work or in line at the grocery store i will pass a kidney stone out of pure disgust

[obscenicon]

i think that generally it is fine and okay to exclude men from lesbian spaces. lesbians is about women. we dont need to coddle dudes who are insecure bcs a lesbian told them to dni and immediately retreat to the comfort of their casab to excuse it

[houseofwolvess]

abortion has officially been banned in my state. i don't know what to do now. this place just gets worse every day and im totally crushed

[dirtmossart]

Experience I just had

[technikki]

if there is like an actual twitter implosion this time and we get a bunch of tpntwt users im gonna become one of those paranoid people in like apacolypse stories who answers the door with a loaded gun pointed at the person. are you normal about shipping teenage characters. are you normal about emma’s gender expression. this is the only place where i can regularly find don stuff that doesn’t make me incredibly violent if i see anything weird about him its ON SIGHT i dont believe in blocking i’ll just kill you 

[neverendingford]

.

[unnameablethings]

genuine serious take: there should be more m/f romances written by queer people. as a bisexual trans man I have been. at various points in my life. -a man attracted to women -a woman attracted to men -a woman attracted to women -a man attracted to men

this makes me more qualified than ANY CISHET IN THE WORLD to design the objectively most attractive and compelling m/f relationships. SPECIFICALLY being trans is also a really good way to dodge some of the pitfalls of conflating things like "submissive/receptive/passive/feminine/bottom" and "dominant/active/penetrative/masculine/top" as being sort of inherent gender roles.

There needs to be more m/f romance with delicate men being tenderly protected and cared for and powerful women being a little too aggressive and dominant. Sometimes I see the glimmerings of straight people Wanting This. like. women swooning over delicate beautiful weeping twinks or the worlds soggiest and most pathetic men, or men getting into femdom shit, but there's this sort of Gender Block which means that they can't quite picture this as a serious romantic interest. I can change this!!!! I can change them!!! I can baby bird good m/f romance to the heterosexuals. And You Can Join Me. we can turn this ship around. booktok male love interest but as a brooding morally gray bloodthirsty woman instead and her innocent but snarky sweet-faced male love interest. see the vision in your mind.

[velvetvexations]

RE: Binary Privilege, I really think youtuber VerilyBitchie said it best in her video on monosexism that privilege can be broken down into two parts; unjust enrichment and spared injustice. The example she uses is a bisexual man from a country where being queer is a crime being denied asylum because a judge does not view him as queer enough to actually be in danger(or even queer at all), while a gay man would be approved by that same judge because they think he's more at risk. The gay man is not being unjustly enriched, he needs asylum! But, he is being spared an injustice, namely his sexuality is seen as more real than the bi man's so he gets to escape while the bi man has to go back to his country and risk imprisonment and death. (This is also why I think it's important to keep in mind that being granted privilege does not necessarily mean a person is an oppressor or capable of leveraging their privilege to oppress. The gay man is not oppressing the bi man in this situation, he is just being given grace the bi man is not granted.)

So while I do think that binary trans people may be spared some injustices that nonbinary people have to deal with, I don't think any of that translates to like, unjust enrichment or the ability to oppress nonbinary people on a systemic level. And even then it does depend entirely on the situation and the people involved. I would be considered nonbinary by cishet people, but I use she/they pronouns, so I am spared the injustice someone who uses say, it/its or a neo-pronoun would face because mine are easier for cishet people to adjust to(even though a lot of cishet people default to her and ignore the fact that I'm trans, they are still using the correct pronouns). I am spared the injustice of having people treat me like a freak for my pronouns and default to the wrong ones because mine are seen as normal and easy to ignore, but I am not gaining any unjust enrichment, and certainly am not being granted the kind of privilege that would allow me to systemically oppress another nonbinary person.

I also think maybe it's important to keep in mind that someone can be bigoted without being an oppressor. Like I do not think that monosexual queer people are my systemic oppressors as a bisexual, BUT I can face bigotry and lateral aggression in the form of monosexism from biphobic monosexual queers. Like they can absolutely uphold my systemic oppression and weaponize parts of it against me, but they are NOT the ones who built or are driving the monosexism machine. That's cishet society. I think that's the what we see with like, transmedicalism and exorsexism from other trans people. They still aren't our oppressors, they aren't granted unjust enrichment or power, but they can still be exorsexist and transphobic and weaponize both against nonbinary people in horrifying ways, and they are also granted some slight privilege that we are not in the form of spared injustice.

I think conversations around privilege and oppression and bigotry are really complicated, and it's just important to keep in mind that having privilege you don't does not always mean someone is your oppressor, and also that someone can be bigoted and oppressive towards you without actually being your systemic oppressor class, you know? Or that's at least how I think about it, and it seems to help break down the conversation in a way that avoids too much finger pointing or semantic circular arguments over terminology that get us nowhere.

I like the scientific breakdown of "privilege," that's a very cool way of putting it.