#again sorry writing is taking so long

[layraket]

I had an adorable mental image I think you would appreciate: Bunny!Legend snuggling with Hyrule when one or both is stressed or upset. Just a pink fluff ball sitting in the lap of his successor so they can both destress

Lately days have been harder; more things in his mind doing the rounds, constant fighting that only means more use of magic and energy, just staying awake. Hyrule isn't one to complains, he grew up always trying to see the brighter side, everything had one.

Right now though, it was a lot more difficult than usual.

Twilight and Legend had gone to patrol the area where they will set camp to make sure that there aren't any monsters. When Twilight came back, there was no veteran to see next to him. Just a pink bunny on his arms.

Hyrule was put on keeping an eye on the bunny duty so the rancher could go for Sky. Why? Something about needing the master sword.

"I wonder where's Legend..." He said to no one, maybe the bunny, he (was a he right? Twilight talked about him as a boy) was the only one who could hear him right now.

The bunny turned to look at him, piercing violet eyes meeting bright blue-ish green ones.

"Do you know? You were with Twi after all" He gently grabbed the bunny and put him on his lap, he seemed a little grumpy but at least didn't try to bite him.

He slowly put one hand on the bunny's back, petting his soft pink fur.

"You know, there was a legend about bunnies, them being as a symbol of perseverance and kindness in the toughtess of times, something to do with one of the heroes of the past" He paused for a moment, thinking "Would the hero be Legend?"

If the bunny's ears perked up at that, Hyrule didn't know the reason. He continued petting him, being gentle to not bother the small creature.

"If only they didn't go extint in my time..." Dawn has shown him some old books which contained information about extint animals of the past, bunnies being one of them. Something about the world becoming too hostile and lack of food to survive.

Obviously he wasn't able at the time when that happened, he didn't even born yet! Yet, even if he wished to restoor everything to how things where so no one would have to suffer hunger, cold and fear, it was impossible to happend in his lifetime.

When all this journey is over, he will go back to his time, wandering and not staying in one place, caves and dense forests being his most visited spots. In the past he seemed all that normal, comfortable even with the familiarity, but now after experiencing what it is to have constant company and people who cares for him, he almost wishes for this to never be over.

"I hope he's okay" He looked down at the bunny "Legend is strong, he will come back, right?"

The violet eyes of the bunny showed an intelligence that is not normal in these creatures, but yet there was something else. He sniffed Hyrule's hand and climbed to lay flat on his chest, closing his eyes.

If someone told him that this was how bunnies hugged, Hyrule would believe that. He wrapped the small pink fluffy body with his arms, petting his head.

If Twilight with the master sword in hand noticed some tears falling down his checks, he decided to not say a word.

[doomedclockworkdotmp3]

heeyyy gaaanggg

the pose and the background of the album version (left) are based on oingo boingos only a lad album art. not cause i think he has anything to do with it but just cause ive been wantin to draw that pose for like. weeks and i didnt know who to put there. so why not my latest bug man.

[iamhereinthebg]

I was on the subway and I read a fic about Mystery Kids on Ao3 and suddenly I started crying?

Anyways, you said your shoulders/arm hurt, I hope you feel better now!

The cutest aaaaah

Anon I am on my knees asking if you know any mystery kids fic because I only know like

two (and I think one got deleted and I don't really vibe with the second one dhsjkds :'))

So glad you liked this one so much though :DD Fanfics are so cool

If anyone has any fics on the mysteries/mystery kids please tell meeee ToT (disclaimer: I read most of the fics on the tag of Akane, the three clock keepers, Shijima and Mei on ao3 already rip I don't read on any others websites for fics though :DD ) but even if I may have read it already idc I need to know I may have missed some dhskjds

And thank you I am doing better!! :DD still have a lot of appointements but I believe It will only go in the right direction u.u

[lilybug-02]

Oh!... I guess this comic is PG 13 after all...

Part 17 || First || Previous || Next

--Full Series--

The comic page updates will also be shorter, but more frequent. Using procreate now, so a slight style change.

[causenessus]

hi! i'll keep this short

i came to the realization everytime i've disappeared from tumblr to "take a break" i never really have because of other things going on in my life (which, duh, this isn't my whole life) but! i also realized that if i never actually take the time to recover and rest and think about things i should be writing i'll never feel better. so! i'm (once again)(but now more formally) going on hiatus until maybe may! i might pop in for spring break or earlier if i feel like it, but until then, not really any writing from me! with that being said, i'll still be around, doting on my moots (i.e. like, dorothea <3 wyr <3 and bug <3) because i love them so much and i will probably also post chapters of present ever so often! the reason being (i'm going to try to make this make sense but it may only make sense to me but i'm aware of how contradicting i am to me five seconds ago when i said i need to take a break from writing) present is a very personal fic for me that i've worked on for years at this point. what i'm posting now are chapters i wrote months ago after I've read over and edited them (or in the case of the upcoming chapter, i did randomly add it in and had to write it from the ground up last week lmao) but if it isn't obvious, present is a work i'm very passionate about and am just posting in case anyone else enjoys it but it feels like it's a work that is very individualized just for me and it doesn't cause me any stress or anxiety. on the topic of individualization, although i am of course so so thankful for all of the support and people that follow me, i do sort of miss when my blog and world were a lot smaller. it's something i feel like i only get when i get to reply to people in comments, but other than that, all the numbers and people on my feed give me a lot of anxiety. the hq (smau fandom especially) fandom or at least how much i'm (was) involved in it has grown exponentially and of course i'm happy about that but it's a bit too much for me. i'll be taking a huge step back from the fandom and any hq works i've written at least in the meantime, but that's not to say they'll never be finished! but i either need to grow to handle the bigger audience that now reads my works or wait for things to grow a little smaller again :) i hope to still be able to read my moots works but forgive me if it takes me a bit or i never get to them! i think at the least i'll still like them to show my support <3 thank you if you read my long ramble! i love you all <3

oh also i'll probably post self ship moodboards and the beginning of my reading list (thank you again dorothea for the idea <3)! but again, I think you get the idea by now; I want to go back to doing this for me! so this is a tiny little goodbye now i'm leaving for you all with forehead kisses and flowers and love notes and mwah <3 i'll see you around!

[crybaby-bkg]

Bakugou has always taken care of you, even before you started dating him. when you were mere friends and still learning each other, he remembered all the small things about you. he always seemed to pack the medicine you preferred when you weren’t feeling good. always had a plethora of your fav snacks on his person somehow, like he was just waiting for you to mention wanting it.

he acts put off by it every time, with his scoffing and eye rolling and huffing. but you see the way his eyes narrow when someone beats him to the punch, when you reject his offer of medicine or food. early on you notice, that he just likes to care for you, look after you, be there when you don’t even realize you need someone.

he’s there when you get high for the first time—all worrywart and frustrated sighs when you keep slurring after an hour. he’s there for you, to help lay you down somewhere safe and ward off those with bad intentions. he’s there when you get broken up with—ready to email that fuckers job and let them know how they fucked you over. but he still holds you tenderly with every sob your shaking body heaves. he’s there when you get drunk—handing you waters and letting you pull him in to dance and sing off key.

and when you finally get together, it’s like you don’t even have to learn anything about the other. its likes you’ve been together for a hundred lifetimes, like your quirks have been ingrained into his everyday routine, like you’re the freckle on the lower left corner of his right hand. he falls into you, and you into him, easier than breathing. he just has a knack for caring—and learning and loving—about those he loves.

[grayscale-sparks]

Do you have a headcanon for what kind of memory Charlie "memories are only memories until you're dead" Dowd was going to give up to the Order?

I think that Charlie had three options just like Arthur did.

The first one being the friends he made throughout his life- Adam, the epsilon crew, his coworkers in New York- but he knew how much a sacrifice meant. These loved ones taught him that after all.

The second would have been Roland. The man who picked him up and showed him family and told him “this too shall pass.” It would have been a hearty sacrifice.

The third option would be Noel Finley. The original. His childhood best friend. His first love. Noel taught him love and heartbreak and death and resilience. Noel gave him a future and a name whether he knew it or not. 

And as his hand hovered over that offering plate, he thought that giving up Noel Finley would be like giving back the mask he hid behind for so long. It’s why Arthur was only able to get him to snap out of the King’s control by using his real name. It’s why Kayne, whose whole deal is a chosen name, calls him Charlie.

I think his sacrifice was the memory of Noel Finley. The memory had haunted him for so long, and at the end of everything he was finally able to let go.

[human-encounters-diary]

Day 16

As the human and I did not share any duties during this particular cycle, I decided now might be a fitting time to inform the Vitrichl about the aforementioned book, which could possibly grant a further insight into Terrans.

Despite the quite serious circumstances we are currently in, I was able to secure a time frame to initiate a conversation regarding this topic.

I repeated the information V-7 had been able to conjure on this as well as other stories and reports on humans.

"There seems to be one…obstacle, though: The book‘s last documented location is in system Skė-51-33, which does not seem to be even remotely near our current route.", I eludicated.

The Vitrichl seemed to consider the information given, keeping in mind the reason the SIIR Noxos usually avoids this particular system: its unfriendly and occasionally aggressive nature.

Concluding, I was able to convince the Vitrichl through the benefits this book could provide in the task of studying humans, causing the Vitrichl to eludicate that changing the route was currently not possible, but as soon as the chance was offered to us, we would make a short detour through this system to retrieve said book, given that the book was still located there.

In the meantime, I was tasked with retrieving as much possible information on this particular and other sources about humans.

Our arrival on Fendaar is imminent, as we are nearing the planet‘s atmosphere. Further reports will follow.

[applestorms]

actually. @moonlarked you wanted someone to talk about near & light as parallels? cuz uh...

ok SO, my big hot take on near is something like this: one of the most common criticisms i see about near is that he is simply too apathetic/bored/uncaring/etc, and that because he is not as emotionally invested as L, his win against light doesn't feel nearly (lol) as satisfying as it could've been. this is a view that often frustrates me, but for a very particular reason— namely, while i think it is somewhat accurate in content, i think it misses a lot of important context (and also misses a lot of the importance of light's character arc, but we'll get to that much later).

one of the most important things to remember about the wammy's kids is that, whether they like it or not, each and every one of them is defined almost entirely through their relationship to L. this is perhaps more obvious in the case of characters like BB and mello, who are very Aware of this shadow being cast upon them and react in very overt, emotional ways (e.g. becoming a literal serial killer out of seemingly pure spite & desire to be noticed, idolizing him but in a very emotionally complicated, kinda detached sorta way, etc), but it is true for Every wammy's kid, purely because of how the house itself functions. these kids are being raised to be L's successor— the greatest (and second greatest, and third greatest) detective on the planet. this is the ultimate goal hanging over every one of their heads, and it places a constant pressure on every kid there.

oftentimes, i think (perhaps both out of story and in it, as well?) people get so caught up in comparing near to L that they forget he also falls under this umbrella— only, for near, his position is slightly different because he actually somewhat succeeds at the task? like, yeah, L never gets the chance to officially call near his successor, but between the fact that he's constantly called the #1 kid at wammy's and that he. literally does actually end up becoming the new L after kira, i think it's always been pretty clear what his path was going to be.

going back to my starting point, this is one of the main ways that near makes a really good parallel to light in my mind, specifically the light that we see right at the start of the series. in both cases, near and pre-DN light, we see a kid who has succeeded at everything they've been handed, and more notably, we see a kid who is bored out of his fucking mind looking at the prospects of what he's got.

in the case of light, this is maybe a little more realistic/easy to understand— light does well in academics, he does well in sports, he does well with people. he is likely to follow in his father's footsteps with something criminal justice/police/law related, but even if he diverges from that path it likely won't be too big of a deal, as he has shown himself to be capable in enough areas that he's likely to succeed no matter what. by all measurable standards, light's doing pretty good at the start of the series. and yet— there is something so distinctly and inherently Bland about his life before he gets the DN. i've said before that light wouldn't call the DN a curse even if he wanted to, but i think in that moment when he's telling ryuk he disagrees w/ his father after visiting him in the hospital, when he says, "I've never once considered finding that notebook and gaining this power a misfortune. In fact, it's made me happier than I've ever been." (ch.22) he's still getting at something real and truthful.

again, going back to my equating of boredom with depression in this series— light's life is pretty good by all measurable standards. he has a family who loves him, presumably more than enough money to get by with a pretty cushy lifestyle, and does well, honestly better than well, in every single system he is presented with. but even so, he's still unhappy. there is something in his soul that has not yet been satisfied. he's bored of the world, bored of his place in it, how easy it all is. what the DN really offers him is a challenge, entertainment— just the same as L, and just the same as ryuk.

near similarly suffers from this kind of boredom, though it is perhaps less overtly stated than in the case of light, L, and ryuk, and less easy to catch as it is not as realistic/common. again: near basically ends up the winner of wammy's house. he is the one to take the title of L, he's declared the smartest, bestest kid at wammy's, and he gets all the power and privilege that comes with such a title. but still— he's so. fucking. bored. much to the embarrassment of mello, this shit was never really a challenge to him. it's pretty obvious that near isn't really even all that attached to the title of L— don't forget that his first real introduction to the story involves him explicitly saying that he'd be just fine working with mello as essentially co-L successors. and this is a viewpoint that he holds onto until the very end of the series, actually, claiming that he was only able to best light due to mello's sacrifice. near doesn't really give a fuck about the rat race he's been slotted into, though it's perhaps for that exact reason that he ends up winning it anyway, and getting all the responsibility that comes along.

that being said, i think there are still two main differences between light and near:

light fucks up.

near never gets past his boredom.

in the case of this first point, i do not mean to say that near never ever makes any move/judgement that could be considered a mistake— mello killing the entire SPK is the first thing that comes to mind, which i see as blood on near's hands for the same reason that L takes at least some responsibility for lind l. tailor. rather, i mean that near never makes a such a monumental fuck-up that he has to overturn his entire worldview just to account for it in the same way that light does when he accidentally kills two people w/ the DN the first time.

it's like, if you've ever known (or been) the kind of kid who always got perfect grades in school, straights A's for K-12, only to reach college and suddenly bomb their first test and have an existential crisis as their only real achievement in life is crushed into dust, then you know light yagami. only for light, it's on a whole 'nother scale, because not only does he fucking oopsie daisy kill two people, but he kills in such a context that he can mentally manipulate it back into seeming heroic. i hate to say that suffering causes character development because that's terrible advice (it's how you react to terrible circumstances that matters, imho) but to some degree, yeah, having conflicts/hard times in life is just necessary to figure shit out sometimes. near (and L, oh goddd i need to write about L properly sometime) has so many things smoothed over and handed to him, and on top of that, he's a super genius very rarely fucks anything up, at least according to base logic. he doesn't even really consider the morality of anything he's doing until light straight up asks him in a desperate bid to keep talking at the end, it's all just logic and factors to consider.

this all leads to my second point, which is that near never really gets the chance to overcome his boredom in the same way as the others. ryuk at least gets his entertainment for a couple years, and light and L (and mello) get so invested in each other and their game that it literally kills them, but near just kinda. keeps going. he keeps being L, he keeps solving cases, he does the duty he was given and enjoys his toys... and that's it. he lies around, the only one left to live, never even taking credit for the end of KIRA, never gets another haircut, and keeps the title going. what a life, for a kid who dragged a god back down to earth.

sidenote1: toys

am i reading too into things? maybe. near's toys hold a lot of significance throughout the story in more specific ways, most notably the finger puppets he uses at the very end of the story while tracking different people's/kira's actions, though you could probably read some kind of meaning into every toy he has and the ways in which he plays with them. what i want to look at here though is more the general reasoning behind playing with them in the first place— a desire for a childhood he didn't get to have? a love of games more generally? (could track with him seeing the KIRA case, or really all detective work, as just another game.) you could also read into his toys as another source for near's apathy/detachment from reality, literally breaking every notable person around him down into a doll by the end of the story, speaking a lot to how alienated he is from the world (again, very similar to both L and light, there). i don't have much more of a point to make here, just wanted to add this in somewhere since it's one of his most striking visual character traits.

sidenote2: light's arc

going back to my point at the start of this post... light's character arc.

uhh. near winning is a good thing, actually. and i don't just mean that as a moral claim— DN itself as a story isn't really concerned with trying to answer any moral questions about good or evil or the justice system, so it makes sense & is fair to me that it doesn't try all that hard to answer anything along those lines by the very end of the story. what i mean to say here is that near winning is a good thing on the level of the character arc, specifically as an end to light's arc.

i made a post a while back while mid-manga reread talking through some of the reasons why L's death can feel kind of unsatisfying/paint the second half of the story in a less interesting light (hah) for a lot of viewers, with the main point i ended up on being that L wasn't really able to win because he never really had all that clear of a win state in the first place. i still kiiind of agree with this point, though i think there's a lot more i could add to that post... anyways. point is, i bring up that post because it touches on a similar thing to what i want to talk about here: light's character arc being a tragedy.

this is more speculation on my part, but i think another part of the reason why people get turned off to DN post-L death is not just the fact that L isn't really a playable character in the game anymore, but the fact that light's character arc takes such a dramatic twist after the timeskip. i talked about this a little bit in my little ramble on light & titles (which a lot of you liked, apparently!! ty for all the lovely comments on there, i love reading what you guys have to say ^w^), but light's character arc in DN is a tragedy to me, full-stop.

tragedies to me are cyclical— revolutionary, if you will. since all stories necessitate some kind of something to take place, a tragedy to me is all about a character beginning in one point, then continually getting hit by Event, after Thing, after Event, only to end up in essentially the exact same place that they started. any character changes or development that seem to happen throughout the story are ultimately nullified by the end— the main subject does not truly grow, does not truly reflect on their actions or traumas, does not move on. two steps forward is two steps back. even ending up in a position worse than they started is sometimes better than a true tragedy, in my mind, as at least then there is some chance they may still reflect or change or grow in the future, leaving the hope that they may still overcome this new circumstance later on. a true tragedy ends in nothing meaningful ever getting the chance to truly change, at least in the case of the main subject of the story.

light's character arc in the first half of the story is an upward, underdog kind of story. yes, light has the power of a shinigami, of a supernatural force that the rest of the world doesn't even know exists— but part of the real appeal of his conflict with L is how powerful L feels in comparison, having the wealth and respect and title to command a world's worth of forces against him. fuck, even taking down naomi misora feels like an incredible hurdle overcome, a teenager managing to charm and yap and flutter his eyelashes out of a shitty situation he was only just lucky enough to stumble across in the first place, to stop someone who could've ruined his entire plan with a few words. killing L was always going to be light's greatest accomplishment when it comes to his rise to godhood, not only because of L's great power but the comparative position of light at the time that he did so— not yet an adult, not even really out of school, perhaps barely out of his parents' house.

in contrast, light's arc for the second half of the story is a downward spiral. we see all of the consequences light has been miraculously avoiding smack into him like meteors in this half, his ever-growing ego torn to shreds as he's yanked back down to earth. and in comparison to the anime, the manga really beats this point into you, dedicating the entire second half of the story to light's fall from grace as he loses his mind and loses his humanity. like, while i do kind of prefer the manga ending to the anime, i have to admit that light's death there is fucking brutal. light goes through pages, chapters, purely dedicated to near tearing him a new asshole, only end the story bloody and delirious and crawling on his knees begging a god of death to fix everything— all just to die the exact same death as everyone else he's killed. i mean, look at these fucking pages (ch.107):

(that last fucking picture of him. clawing at the sky. it always fucking gets to me.)

it hurts to read this shit!! we spend the entire first half of the story watching this dude's rise to glory, the entire time stuck inside of his head, emotionally connecting with him even if we don't really mean to or disagree with his actions or question his morality. watching his fall back down, especially after all of that, is fucking painful— an in no way does near make the process any easier. if anything, his blunt, snarky bitchery, saying all the quiet parts out loud, calling light out for being a terrible replacement L and pointing and laughing at his failures to his face, only shoves more salt in the wound, only proves just how human he has been all this time, how meaningless any of his supposed "rise to power" ever really was. light got his fifteen seconds of fame, sure— but near is armed and ready to make sure that's all he'd ever get, that the name Light Yagami would never even be associated with the position he held for so long. six years was all he got— and it was all he was ever going to get, because light yagami did not do this for humanity, he did it for himself. all near did was collect the debt that L prescribed. he fulfilled his duty as told— nothing more, and nothing less.

i just have to wonder... is this why people hate him? because he has no sympathy for the fall? maybe. i don't know.

either way, i don't think i could ever really hate him. it's a big responsibility, being the only one left behind. but near has always been the one to hold such weights on his shoulders.

[m1dnitefloat]

hi!!! i just want to say i love your club penguin ocs so much!!! they have such fun designs <33 i was wondering if you have any lore for them??? or if they interact with the other club penguin characters :3

ohoho you have no idea how much I’ve wanted to ramble about my ocs .. ok i only really have stuff for two of them but yknow ..

(warning for probably horrible writing, this is the first time I’m really putting this stuff into words, and I’m not all that great at writing characters in the first place, so bear with me)

i’ll start off with skye since they’re the one i have the most info on lol

skye is one of my oldest ocs! i created them all the way back in 2012, they were originally an epf agent based on one of the penguins used in some of the promotional material for operation blackout. i’ve written out the epf stuff out of their character since then, though they’ve retained most of their basic traits.

skye is one of the island’s local freelance artists, as well as a member of the stage society and the party committee. they often help with designing and creating sets, props, and decorations for events throughout the island! skye is known for their creativity among their peers, however they’re horrendously shy and dislike being in the spotlight, preferring to work “behind the scenes.”

as for character relationships .. I’d imagine they’d be pretty good friends with dot! canonically, dot has been shown to have a love for theatre, and I like to think she’s had a hand (or flipper?) in designing costumes for various stage plays, so I’d imagine she and skye would bond over that kind of stuff.

skye also eventually becomes good friends with rookie! he first approached them for help with planning the 2014 fair (thanks to a recommendation from dot lol), and skye, somewhat reluctantly, agreed to help out with the design and construction of the amazement park. I’d imagine rookie plays a key role in skye’s character development, helping them come out of their shell somewhat (they have a kinda ‘extrovert adopts an introvert’ thing going on). here’s some bonus funny doodles of them:

some misc facts about skye I’ve had in my head:

- they don’t own any puffles or pets, but they do act as somewhat of a caretaker for the keeper of the stage, making the effort to check up on and put food out for it everyday.

- a bit too dedicated to their craft for their own good, they’ve pulled one too many all-nighters just to work on one of their various projects.

- their favorite artistic medium is painting, though they love to experiment and have dabbled into pretty much every medium at some point (with varying degrees of success).

then there’s my kind-of-penguinsona, agent pinky! or sometimes just ‘pink.’ kind of a weird name I know, i derived it from my og username on club penguin, pinkyrose059, since that’s what I based pinky off of.

pinky is a laid-back, but somewhat jaded, tactical agent for the epf. they have kind of a ‘been there, done that’ attitude, leading them to not really take their agent role all that seriously (i can imagine them quarreling with their boss, jpg, sometimes cause of this) …. that’s all I kinda got for them rn, i haven’t really had much in mind for them compared to skye lol.

[yansurnummu]

TES fest day 8: free day

The first fic I ever finished and posted was The Blood of the Coven in 2016, which followed Anthelion through the Dark Brotherhood quest line in Oblivion.

I set a goal at the beginning to do at least one of these prompts, and somehow I actually managed to do them all! I had lots of fun and it was great to see everyone else's amazing art and writing as well :)

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

The whole discourse about the privacy/secrecy/support thing has been sitting with me for a few days (I mean other than it always does to a certain degree) thanks to all the excellent discussion happening and I know I'm not saying anything that hasn't been said a million times before, but I think what we're seeing and what we're going to learn (e.g. from TTPD) is that it wasn't just the support issue, but how it was shown/handled.

We've all gone out of our way to show that introversion =/= lack of support. Someone can be shy, reserved, etc. and still show up for their partner, whether in public or at home. To chalk any of the differences up to the clash between introversion and extroversion is unfair to folks who count themselves among either tbh.

@thisisctrying said something the other day that hit the nail on the head about how if that support had been offered in private, there very well may not have been a Joever to begin with, or at least not at this point in time. (Sorry for loosely paraphrasing, and for namedropping you! Long time listener, first time poster.)

If this were a case where the "shy" partner said, "I am really uncomfortable with the spotlight personally and do not want to court it, but I will support you in your ambitions and offer you whatever you need to make them happen and make the glare bearable," I suspect that would have gone a long way to making Taylor feel seen and comfortable in pursuing her goals in the way that she now has. Again, that might have been more akin to the balance that seemed to have been struck around 2019 from what we can see, but even speaking in a general sense, there are lots of couples out there, celebrity or not, that have similar approaches where there are highly driven people and busy careers involved.

(A famous example being Dolly Parton's marriage. Tbh I know next to nothing about her and Carl, but she's always heralded as an example in this regard, because her husband is famously uncomfortable with the spotlight and hasn't accompanied her to public events in decades, but she's said that she never minded that because that was always work to her, and what was important was that he supported her in pursuing all her career goals and basically ensured she had a place to call home to return to at the end of the day.)

We're kind of in a brave new world with her current relationship because it felt like, at least at the start, we were maybe watching her figure out her boundaries in real time as to what she was comfortable with or not and adjust accordingly. Like so many have said, I fully believe the extreme privacy thing was initially driven by herself and her experiences in 2016, and she needed that quiet time to recover from all of the things and figure out how to exist in the world again.

Stating the obvious, it seemed like eventually privacy was equated with secrecy, turning the relationship and the celebrity into the elephant in the room and something to never be spoken of to the outside world. People are free to choose whatever works best for themselves and their relationships, and for some the separate public lives might work, but the “kept me like a secret but I kept you like an oath” theme is all over her work and it’s clear that it’s a sore spot for her, because she’s been made to feel shame just for the life she leads so many times in the past.

What I’m trying to say is that it’s pretty obvious something Not Great was happening behind the scenes, which didn’t just amount to “she wanted to be a public celebrity and he wanted to be a private hermit.” (Also, in case anyone forgot, this is a person who also chose a public-facing career who also has to engage in press for it, but I digress.) As her career reached new heights post-folklore, if she had the support at home to do all the things without judgment and with encouragement, and in turn offer the same support to her partner, she may have very well lived just fine with that, not unlike Dolly Parton’s case.

By reading between the lines in all the press since, as well as comments on tour and general ~vibes~ with TTPD teasers, it seems like one of the issues was that that was likely not the case. There was all the stuff that we saw — the reticence to acknowledge each other in the media (particularly on one side), the lack of public support even at events at which they were both in attendance for their respective jobs, the great lengths they went to not to be photographed together at events they attended yet no problem taking pictures with other friends and coworkers, the jobs that separated them, the withdrawing from the public even for work accomplishments, etc. Which could all be manageable if a couple chooses to do so together and are not inherently a sign of trouble in themselves.

But what we’re seeing now I think is a reflection of the things we weren’t seeing then, and it seems to indicate some very deep hurt. (I know, call me Captain Obvious.) And like so many have been saying, it feels likely that that part of that hurt is rooted in that very lack of private support where a person would expect it from their partner. Obviously as a Taylor fan blog I’m going to be more inclined to understand her side of a story, but tbh, it’s also because… this is sooooooo common, and something I’ve experienced in my friend group. (@taylortruther is right when she says most breakups are the same one way or another lol.)

One partner is resentful of the other’s success, or resentful that the other’s priorities begin to evolve as new experiences unlock new goals, or feels the other’s ambitions are not worthy of pursuit, and coupled with perhaps their own struggles in the same domain, it’s easy to see where that can chip away at the other partner’s morale and faith in the relationship. I know I’m just speculating here, but I also don’t think it’s totally unfounded. (Again, because a) I’m picking up what she’s putting down and b) it happens to sooooooo many women even among us dull normals.)

With all the pointed mentions about how much Taylor feels supported in her current relationship and how she in turn loves to offer the same show of support to not only her partner but other loved ones, how she’s stepped out more in the last year to a whole host of events, how she’s mentioned feeling like she locked herself away for years and she’s just proud of her partner and happy she can show up for him even if the chaos around it is unsettling, it paints a picture of what perhaps was happening before last year.

To feel like you’re all alone in carrying the weight of the relationship (or burden of it), of twisting yourself into knots to accommodate the other person’s boundaries (or insecurities) but not feeling reciprocity for your own has to be so painful. (The idea that it may have been even darker and to have a partner not only be unreceptive to your own needs but even perhaps resentful/dismissive/belittling of them is even more painful to think of. I guess we’ll find out when TTPD comes out if that was the case, too.)

At a certain point, that lack of acknowledgement will force your hand to be able to reclaim yourself. And it feels like the further removed Taylor in particular is from it, the more she moves from being sad about the life she felt she gave up by leaving, to angry at the life she felt she was giving up by staying. Especially being in a relationship now where it seems like everything comes much easier, where she can be open about the person she’s with and show up for them, all the stuff that seemed as challenging as climbing Mount Everest in her past is nothing more than a molehill at best in her current life.

TL;DR: I don’t think it’s privacy that inherently spells doom for a celebrity relationship like this; it’s the mutual support and respect that does. If Taylor had felt that in the later years of her previous relationship, I think we could be seeing a different, though not necessarily unfulfilled, person right now in 2024, who’d be happy on tour but whose personal life would look a little different. But it seems like by losing that support she lost parts of herself, and we’ve seen her reclaim that in spades in the last year, and perhaps to degrees she didn’t even realize she could from before all the Bad Stuff started happening in her young adulthood.

I know this was extremely long-winded and unnecessary, especially about total strangers we only know through scraps fed through the media, but I just always bristle at this idea that issues like these boil down to “personality differences,” as though one person wants to live in a city and the other on a remote island, or some shit like that. The whole support (and gender tbh) issue is one that’s just very close to my heart because again, I have seen it play out with so many of my friends in long term relationships and marriages and I just think people in relationships (and women in particular in some circles) deserve better than to feel like they’re being, well, tolerated.

[themissingnumbers]

Y'know what- That's fair. Glitch City wouldn't be a very comfortable place to be in, would it?

But now I'm kinda curious... If you're in Gen 1 Viridian City like you said, then how is the Pokemon Center not all broken and corrupted? Is Glitch City like- I don't really know how to phrase this- Contained??

I've always had this idea in my head that Glitch City wasn't just one corrupted city but like a Kanto-wide thing. But, if you're safe in Viridian, then maybe it's not as widespread as I think it is... Sorry Green, I know I'm making a lot of assumptions, but could you tell me how the Gen 1 world works? If you want to, of course.

"Hoo boy, well, I'll try to explain all I can, Also, Don't worry 'bout it, make as many assumptions as you want, hell you can even be assumptive about me if ya want, I'm just here to entertain you after all, Aren't I?"

"Anyways, Lets take these in chunks!"

"No, no, you're right, The Gen-One Kanto was broken into rotting pixels and bits.

Buuuuut, as ya know, there's more than one cartridge- more than one game for the first gen too. Did'ja think every version of Kanto was like that buggy mess?"

"Nah.."

"Just two!"

"Though, technically I would say yes to this, it is at least somewhat contained. Hell every god's gotta have a couple handfuls of eternity prisons where it keeps its least favored. Some get mountain, some get graves, some get depressed, Some get Bitrot."

"If ya want more info on the world though, you're gonna have t' ask fer more specifics, can't just dump a mile-long history lecture."

"Yes, I'm referring to Reddo, though you're right, there are many rejects 'round here."

"I disagree though I think he is little. Sure he may be tall but he's practically a skeleton. I can break him like a twig. And have broken him like a twig."

"Nah, as I said, not gonna spend my time in a bitrot hell prison if I don't gotta.

My Kanto's just empty and abandoned for a different reason. Last time I saw a person here was.."

"It was...er..."

"hm. Maybe it was when I..."

"Yeah.. Yeah, it was...."

He shrugs.

"Oh nah they're just some part of me or somethin or other. I don't think I got the like. carving-painting-other skill bull to do that anyways. I just take the textures and my sprite does its work for me."

FIRST | PREV | NEXT

[ganondoodle]

some ramblings about the overworld and reusing of the map in totk

i was one of the people that didnt mind revisiting the same map bc i loved the world and would gladly rexplore it all again, i was confident theyd change it up so it felt fresh again .. but it really wasnt, but even if it wasnt i was fine with it bc i was sure theyd HAD to use the build up from botw, with the shiekah and yiga alone theres so much you could do, and a captivating story or characters are more important than any map change to me-

and then, most changes on the surface were artificially stuck onto the world, like some small boulders the size of a large boulder stuck onto a wall, weirdly fusing with it (but thats not relevant and doesnt have a reason either) which really doesnt change anything much, some caves and holes in the ground but nothing really substantial at all, the most changed was death mountain and the gerudo city (while the regions themselves didnt really change either .. no in any interesting way at least to the extend i saw in my what 200+ hours)

im no game dev expert but do know a little and changing up a model and breaking stuff off really isnt THAT much to do so i really dont understand why they dotted the world with useless rocks and little caves that are all extremely similar instead, but then change stuff that is WEIRD to change and would have been easier to leave as it was- like the shrine of life being scraped of the walls, or smoothing over the places were shiekah towers were in botw like they never existed in the first place, and then sometimes adding something for no reason (like apparetly theres a new useless tiny ruin on the akkala fortress??? why?? how?? and i heard someone say they changed how the big hole in one of the peaks of the big mountains looked, like the icy blue texture was removed?? i dont know if i went there in my playthrough but i dont doubt it lol) and instead of the holes of the big shiekah tech pillars being left its just .. filled up with dirt, just like the bit of the calamity ganon arena being jsut rock now and the pit being fileld with just dirt as well-

and theres MORE changes that are arguably MORE time consuming to do but are both unnecessary to do and also WEIRD, erase everything shiekah and say it all vanished into thin air while theres clearly guardian parts in the new, shittier, towers and one decayed left at the hateno institue, the ancient furnace isnt just GONE its filled with rocks that had no way to get there naturally

but then the rest of the world is pretty much the same, with very little changes and if its plopped onto it without actualyl meaning anything, even inconvenience you too, like the path to hateno being blocked by a fortress of monsters so you cant get there via horse, and even if you clear them out, with or without the quest, they just come back with the bloodmoon, i thoguht if i do it with the quest theyd be gone for good and clear the path again, but NO you participating in the fight means nothing but another checkmark bc they will redo it over and over and it will be blocked again anyway (but then the "pirates" which are also a monster fortress .... dont come back ... waht) or the blockage of the bridge at the twin mountains too, you cant actually change anything, the one in the gerudo valley is also just another weird blockage, do you want to force me to build stuff? no thanks ill just walk then and be annoyed about it bc thats way easier

(sidenote, satori being reduced to someone pointing at caves that doesnt even tell you if you did them already or not is so disrespectful, i loved satori bc it wasnt some player helper but a strange and beautiful being, it jsut lived there and you had to be careful to even catch a glimps of it, the atmosphere around it being creepy and otherworldly you dont know what its really capable of, like you are staring at a godly being you cannot talk to but it accepts you when you are there and leaves as soon as you let go of it.... and nows its just a cave pointer...)

so, especially if you played botw, it all very much feels like a retread but with little sprinkles and weird changes (or outright annoying ones like the shrine of life being licked of the walls) here and there and othertimes just plain annoying inconveniences, and then the main points of your quest are .... in the same spot as in botw as well, its at rito village, death mountain, gerudo town, zoras village ... its repetition is entirely unnecessary, you had interesting locations all over the map, put a temple into or under akkala fortress my god that things i BUILD for that, anything in akkala really, put another one high into the mountains, in or UNDER hateno?? the krog forest or the deku tree being one?? kakariko??? no ?? it jsut had to affect each species exactly where they are .. again, and even the temples are there so its not even a thing made there affects the town nearest but still far away enough to be different or the terrain literally leveled the ground and they are gonna have to look to settle elsewhere (the closest is gerudo town but like ... is it), its not just repetetive but also makes the regions feel WAY more disconnected and self contained, none of them care about each other or do anything but defend against the thing that conveniently affects them directly at the same place again and the activities are largely the same too, find shrine find krog

ok then we got the sky, .. which is largely empty with just some repeating minibosses or some get crystal to there thing, its empty and barren of life, not a single NPC ever goes up into the sky aside from two dungeons companions, despite them already using the sonau tech ballooons and what not and having literal bird people there AND being literally obsessed with anything sonau, rarely theres a construct there, a robot with little to tell and not really doing anything, the ruins dont tell a story either, its just .. there

then theres the underground and omg its just as big as the overworld map! and then the .. terrain and look of it is almost always the same (only in the gerudo region is it a little more sandy) with the same kind of sonau thingies being the same everywhere that dont even LOOK ancient, it bothers me so much, are you telling me this building has been here for well over 10 THOUSAND YEARS?? and then the lightroots ... are in the same spot as the shrines .. so its not even a discovery really bc you know where shrine or root is now .. and then every more important place is literally beneath surface important places (even under taburasa .. the town you newly built in botw) which again .. isnt really a discovery then, and then the map itself is just the surface map but inverted, which to some may be a neat thing but, to me ... so its the surface AGAIN but more boring bc it doesnt have any regional differences too and then they have the gall to put the old amiibo stuff there (the labyrinths??? you go throguh all that and its just the renamed same armor from botws DLC??? how dare you), or some crystal things for your battery that are just another currency that has to be exchanged twice to specific people to be most useful- and the big weird magician statues ?? man idk if i should help this one, the giant mech like statue is giving me the creeps, and how the hell is it talking through the statues of thE GODDESS??? HUH´? and then it turns out its just a guys that sells you largely useless stuff for yet another currency you can only use at few specific spots

even the enemies are the same aside from mini- and gigamas, it even repeats the enemies from the surface

the best part of the underground/surface are the yiga, and even they are made kinda boring, in the underground its little outposts that give you some crystal currency and blueprints for autobuild i bet you arent ever gonna use, the most valuable thing is their little diaries and on the bigger spots koga (he is surperior to every single other character, sorry gan) but even kogas questline is like .. removed from everything else, its its own contained thing ocne again ... the arenas that are kinda fun to do but ultimately

you have a barely changed map from botw, a largely empty sky with some rather boring shrines or minibosses that get used over and over and no story to tell really, and then the entire map of the surface again with important points and shrine points being repeated as well

and then you get option over option to skip any traversal of all that too, with ultrahand and the towers and the ceiling jump and fast travel its a repetetive map twice and one largely empty with out skipping from point a to point b

i know how difficult game dev is, but in all those years with a giant team and money this is it? and not even the story has anything to go for? how do you take the addictive exploration of botw and turn it boring

anyway, yet another ramble taking me the entire evenign to write, again, this is not meant as blind hatred but an expression of my feelings and thoughts about it and for this one why it felt so weird and boring to explore ... the thing i like so much about botw ..

[hanzajesthanza]

maybe i just don’t follow enough about the fanfiction community anymore but… i feel like plot and story, and actually making scenes make sense and have structure and purpose, is harder to get write than even other things about writing that i consider hard—like having consistent, relevant pacing and creating natural-sounding, in-character dialogue.

and from what i’ve seen, it’s like no one ever talks about improving this major overarching skill, when compared to how much as they talk about minute and minor details to improve with your writing, like the vocab you use.

and maybe fanfiction is uniquely challenged here because the point of it (if the source material is decent, anyways) is supposed to be that it’s not necessary, and is often without a serious purpose and written without structure.

my interpretation of it is that the core of writing (which is giving your readers a reason to read) is assumed to be already accomplished when you write fanfiction—because it’s fanfiction—but this is often to the detriment of the writing, no matter if it’s fanfiction or not, because writing needs that purpose to exist.

[kyouka-supremacy]

Who in sskk would you say has the higher IQ?

IQ as in, conventionally smart? Then definitely Atsushi does. I'm sorry. I've said it many times before, but I don't think Akutagawa is a particularly perceptive person. Or witty. Or intelligent in general. It's due to external factors, he never got the chance to have anything that could resemble a proper education; but it's also a matter of his nature, he's just so impulsive, and narrow-minded, and stubborn, he really has the thickest skull ever. But seriously, especially in a world full of geniuses, Akutagawa simply doesn't shine for sharpness of mind, and is way too impulsive and instincts-driven to be a person that relies on reflection or rationality. Everything that Akutagawa does is the epitome of irrational, it's one of the greatest appeals of the character.

Atsushi is smart,,,, I've talked about this also, and I think it's less sustained by canon than for Akutagawa, but I like to think he's a very observant and perceptive person whose intelligence doesn't show because he's constantly surrounded by geniuses, but still he is smart. When it comes to observations skills, I find it easy for him to have them due to his childhood of ill-treatment and abuse: as a defense mechanism, he learnt to be especially observative of people's behaviour in order to tell what sets people off and be able to prevent any escalation, I think that's a widely shared abuse survivor experience. Something among these lines is shown in chapter 51:

I also think Atsushi is a very fast learner. He's observant, and that results in him constantly absorbing other people's knowledge. He's often asking for explanations for Dazai and Ranpo's reasonings, and although I know more often than not it solves an expositive role in the storytelling picture, there's still the fact that it makes Atsushi a person who's constantly trying to understand the reality surrounding him. Atsushi is also shown to be very cool-minded and calculating in fight: from him sliding under Akutagawa and attacking him from behind successfully eluding having to face him front-off in chapter 4, to him retracting his tiger limbs to escape Rashomon's bonds in chapter 12, to the strategy he elaborated with Tanizaki (and his ability to catch up on that) to defeat Lucy in chapter 16, to his attempt to outsmart Fitzgerald in chapter 34 (that, although failed, was still driven by rational thinking nonetheless), and the list could go on. The way in fight Atsushi is shown to ponder over and implement the advices people like Dazai or Mori offered him further makes me believe he's really good at absorbing information. And Atsushi is probably book smart, too! He's compelled by reading to the point he would even risk the orphanage director's punishment just to sneak into the library and read (not explicitly supported by canon, but I can take a guess). According to the second guidebook, he spends his leisure time borrowing books from the library and studying. Overall, he really seems to be rational in all the places Akutagawa is on the contrary driven by impulses¹.

It's like… A physics law when it comes to sskk, that Akutagawa will have the most despicable trait while Atsushi has the trait that is conventionally considered the best; or at least that's as far as my characterization of them goes. Atsushi is beautiful, Akutagawa is ugly². Atsushi is polite, Akutagawa is rude. Atsushi is pure, Akutagawa is stained. Atsushi is smart, Akutagawa isn't. Atsushi is lovable, Akutagawa is destined to cause repulsion in everyone he meets³. In the end, none of this matters: they're no different where it counts, that is, Atsushi isn't any more morally just than Akutagawa is. Atsushi in not any more good than Akutagawa is (I actually suspect the contrary is true). But as far as appearances go, it's still important to portray them as opposites, because Akutagawa being unlovable and Atsushi receiving all the love Akutagawa didn't get for being his contrary - even though deep down they're the same - is almost everything their relationship is about. It's also a big part of why they act like they do towards each other: it's source of Akutagawa's bottomless envy for Atsushi; it's source of how devoted and loyal he will grow to be for him - reaching the point of giving his life for him -, because he can't see Atsushi as anything but perfection. It's source of confidence and of that certain justified hatred towards Akutagawa Atsushi feels because to his eyes Akutagawa is about the worst person to have ever walked on earth. It's source to their wish to annihilate the other as the opposite they can't exist at the same time of. It's the reason Akutagawa had to die, because he's not the good one. Overall it's also expression of Akutagawa's thematic struggle to be good and unavoidable failure at that because of the constraints of a narrative that never wanted him to be good.

But I also think they can make it work. More precisely, I think sskk can make it work when both of them can overcome and defeat the narrative dichotomy they found themselves stuck into: by recognizing that deep common ground of “we're the same” and that where it matters, in morals, neither of them is better or worse than the other. The Beast universe exemplifies that for us readers, but they don't know Beast, so they'll have to realize it by their own. About that, I think Akutagawa already caught on, because he was faster to call out the hypocrisy of Atsushi's good guy façade, and from that it's a short distance to realizing that, as much as he hates to admit it, at his core Atsushi is not that different from himself. It's taking a little more for Atsushi to realize, because it's harder to get down from that higher moral pedestal he believes himself to be on, but with his whole reevaluating Akutagawa after he stopped killing and sacrificed himself for him (and then saved him again. And then showed him how formidable of a team they are when they find a common ground.), I think he's getting there.

Tl;dr: Atsushi is smart and Akutagawa is stupid and yes it fits their personalities, but way more importantly it's consistent with the themes they carry that translate in what their relationship is like.

¹ For further reading on how Atsushi can be witty, please refer to @/gloomierdays's tags on this post. ² For further reading on how Atsushi and Akutagawa's looks can be used to reflect their characters themes, please refer to this post. ³ For further reading on how Akutagawa being not smart (as far as conventional definitions of smart go) ties to his character themes, please refer to this post.