#again maybe it's projection but. yeah. I don't know.
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can I just say in the midst of the negative anon(s) that as someone who used to feel like I needed to be coddled in order to Be Okay, your posts and your tone have actually been so empowering for me because like, yeah, I'm a wholeass GOD, not an insecure kid who needs to be gentle parented. like I'm all for Love and Compassion but who the fuck says that Love and Compassion have to be demonstrated in the same way by everybody we meet??
and like, even if you were being outright mean (which I haven't actually seen from you so idk what anons are projecting lol), would a GOD be so fragile that someone else's attitude affects their confidence? it's not like you're abusive lmao what are ppl on about.
so like. I know you don't need anyone else's permission to be your awesome self, but for what it's worth, yes pls keep doing you 👏 💖 😭
and thank you for leading by example and being unapologetically yourself; it's not your job to use the words and tone that other people think they need to hear in order to be okay.
and I hope the ppl who've been identifying with the idea that they need to be coddled find empowerment despite themselves. 💖 like, to anyone else reading this,, we're so powerful y'all. if you look for reasons to feel victimized you're gonna find them. maybe try looking for reasons to feel strong and confident af instead? because you're actually a badass bitch (gender neutral). don't forget who you are, y'all ✨
Anon I need you to send me an emoji too omg I love you!! It's really crazy how so many "coaches" and "teachers" of the law have made so many people feel like the have to be fully dependent on them. Giving someone else credit for the success you have made defeats the whole purpose. I don't get phased by things people say bc I know they are just projecting and frustrated with themselves but thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words. I HOPE EVERYONE READING THIS HEARD WHAT ANON SAID! As the creator of your experience if things people say rub you the wrong way, it says more about you than who ever was talking to you. Remember that. thank you again my love!!!
#anon ask#itsrlymine#law of assumption#manifest#manifesting#manifestation#loassumption#lawofassumption#void state#shifting#shiftblr#shifting community#shifting blog#imagination is reality#reality shift#pure consciousness#i am awareness#shifters#loa blog#loa tumblr#instant manifestation#desired reality#living in the end
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Light stalks into the hotel room at 1 a.m. It's November 12th already.
They called his mom earlier. He'd almost forgotten, in the midst of it all. Light told her the truth — or as close to the truth as he could get, anyway. The raid. The gunshot wounds. The blood loss. His words came out odd and robotic, which was bad, because it was suspicious. He wasn't sure why he wasn't projecting emotion right.
Aizawa and Ide kept sneaking glances at him through the whole thing. They weren't subtle. Matsuda wasn't either, but at least there was only sympathy in his eyes. Misa held his hand through it all, tracing circles with her thumb. The touch was repulsive. He's pretty sure he'd dug his nails into her palm, considering how hard he'd gripped her hand back, but she hadn't complained a bit.
Sachiko cried. Misa cried, too, even though Dad had never been her father. It felt like an insult to Soichiro Yagami's memory that Light couldn't make the tears come out of his own eyes. He was usually so good at faking it. The dryness felt damning.
"I'll arrange the funeral," he said.
"I'll fly over right away," his mom answered quickly. "I'll get Sayu—"
"No!" He lurched out of his seat without meaning to, then fell back. "Don't tell Sayu."
Aizawa and Ide eyed each other again. He wanted to kill them all.
"We'll have to at some point," his mom said gently.
"I know," Light said. He swallowed. "But Mom, neither of you can come. It won't be safe here. You rented the countryside house for a reason, right? You both have to stay put for now. Mello is still active."
He hoped she would argue. She didn't. "Alright," she said softly. "But you tell me if you need anything, okay, Light?"
"Okay," Light said, and the rest of the conversation was logistics.
It's almost half past one in the morning now. The task force is asleep. Misa is, too, on one of the twin beds they pushed together. He thinks about writing down all the criminals he can in one night and murdering everyone in the building and jumping off the hotel balcony.
"Ryuk," he says instead, as he sits down on the edge of the other bed.
"Yeah?"
He tries to laugh. It comes out wrong, too, but not as badly as the earlier attempt at tears had. "It's funny, isn't it?"
"Wow, Light, I didn't think you were that cold," Ryuk remarks.
"It's just," Light says, "that he only lived one day after trading for the eyes. So even if he hadn't… I guess he wouldn't have stayed alive that long anyway."
Ryuk frowns. "Huh? I don't get it."
"The eyes take away half of your remaining lifespan, right? And Dad wasn't killed by the Death Note, so that really was his natural lifespan. Which means, since he died after one day, he was only going to live two days if he hadn't traded."
It should be a relief. It is a relief. It's not Light's fault. Soichiro Yagami was going to die anyway.
"Wrong," Ryuk says.
Light flinches backwards. It's been five years, but sometimes Ryuk's smile still scares him. "What do you mean, wrong?"
"Welllll… maybe wrong? I dunno, actually." Ryuk scratches his chin with one claw. "Yeah, maybe you're right. I haven't looked at the rules in forever."
"Ryuk, what are you talking about?"
"See, I'm not sure if that half is from how long you would've lived without the Death Note, or if it's from your new lifespan after you get the Death Note."
Light gapes at him. "It's obviously the second one!"
"That's the funny thing, Light-o," Ryuk says, and grins. "You can't know how long someone's gonna live if they have the Death Note. It's impossible. That's why you can't see the numbers over the heads of Death Note owners."
"But — Misa traded half her life away," Light says. "Twice. So it can't be her original lifespan, since that stalker was going to kill her."
Ryuk shrugs. "Who knows? Maybe she's been trading halves of zero this whole time."
"That's… No," Light says. He doesn't notice the way his fingers tighten around his grip on the thin hotel sheets. "No. That would be stupid."
"It is stupid," Ryuk agrees. "You're probably right."
"I'm definitely right." Breathe in. Breathe out. "So you don't know how much time you got from Dad — from my father?"
"No clue," Ryuk says cheerfully. "But it's okay. I've killed oodles of regular people, so I should still have a lot of life left to go."
Light abruptly, desperately hates him.
"I'm going to bed," he says. "Talk to you in the morning."
"Cool," Ryuk says. "I'll go sightseeing."
---
a/n: happy 11/11 :)
#light yagami#soichiro yagami#ryuk#death note#hahahaaa it is in fact nov 12 almost half past one in the morning. california time even!#im so glad i can actually post this at a reasonable time. not in terms of tumblr reasonable. in terms of plot reasonable
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I see that you're a prince Legend enjoyer. Mind if I tell you about my hc about that? Jsjsjsjajsjs
- His clothes are the only ones that have golden thread. Something only royals can have, still the rest of his clothes are made of common cotton.
- He gave up his right to be the king. But he's still a prince, and he helps Fable in anything he can. He's a free soul, and Fable knows that.
- His uncle is, in fact, the captain of the royal guard. Because of the triforce in Legend's hand (another hc that all the Links have the triforce on their hand, it's just more visible on some of them) everyone knew he was the next hero so the royal family told the captain to take care of Legend and teach him how to use a sword.
- But Legend's uncle saw more in him than just a prince/hero, so he also taught him the value of hard work with the apple field. And tried to save him from his destiny, that's why he tried to save Fable before Legend.
- Almost nobody knows that Legend is a prince. So, for his kingdom he's only an adventurer and he's ok with that.
- The chain knows he's a prince. But they only use that title to tease him.
- Legend often tries to flee from royal events, but Fable stops him. He learned to dance and he sometimes played for the people. In the end, he stays on the events for about 20 minutes, and then he's out of there. He has a small social battery and feels overwhelmed. He also doesn't talk in those events, he prefers to use sign language.
Hello hello, I do not mind at all I love receiving headcanons :D
All of this is interesting !
I like the detail of the golden embroidery being a sign of nobility :0 Four do have them too though if I remember correctly... (Four, something to share with the class...? Lmao no but it could have changed between his time and Legend's, or it could be a gift from his Zelda, who is his best friend in Minish Cap I believe)
I have to admit, I also like the darker take of the royal family supposedly being blessed to only have girls (in the public's eye) since only the women of the family have Hylia's powers... Meaning they abandon/hide Legend at his birth for being a boy D: the drama !
But I never really bothered to think about a way for the royal family to have abandonned Legend without that, and your version do work very well ! The triforce is a powerful sign, but for a public figure to have it... It's ought to bring bad people's attention !
(also yeah in my heart all the Links have the triforce on their hands too hahaha)
I also (in my personal stories !) don't feel the need for Legend to actually give up on the right to be a king, since Hyrule's princesses must be such powerful historical figures... Even if you don't take in account the "only girls" thingy, maybe they at least should get on the throne first ? Sure, we only saw kings in LoZ games, but they never had a queen ; maybe they only get on the throne when the queen dies ?
(Again, you don't have to agree haha ! I do enjoy multiple contradictory headcanons at all time ; I'm just typing as I'm thinking, it's not to dismiss what you told me)
In any way, yeah, I absolutely think that Legend don't want to be king/a noble, and stays the friendly adventurer in his kingdom !
Once the chain knows he's a prince they absolutely tease him to no end haha ! But I do think he wouldn't tell them before a loonnng time (eyeing the "average nobody" line, which gets hilarious with this headcanon). I also would love for him to reveal it by mentioning it casually and everyone losing their mind wondering if he's joking lmao
And omg I think the exact same about his social battery hahaha ! (If only for projecting myself on him not gonna lie 😂)
I do think he has a fun time, especially if he plays like you say— he likes to make people happy ! But put him an hour in here and the boy's brain is absolutely fried. 24 hours nap to ensue !
#Thank you for the ask :D <3#Hope the answer made sense. I do love to ramble hahaha#linked universe#lu legend#prince legend headcanon
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Homestuck: Beyond Canon Upd8 for November 11, 2024
*flops*
Don't mind me.
Just gonna lie here while I do the Homestuck liveblog thing.
I am going to give a heads up. If my next migraine treatment brings me a bit more back in line, I'll be doing VLogs again. I have a bigger video project planned, but it's not Homestuck related. I'll be posting the updates here though, so you'll still know when I blog an upd8. Then you'll all get to see my haggard and aged face.
We begin with the monthly news upd8 from James. Except no! It is in fact an upd8 from Miles! James fades into the background, and apparently Miles will be our flattering correspondent from now on.
It looks like Miles is putting potential spoilers in the news post, so I might have to be careful in the future. Of course these might be jokes. We'll have to see.
Work continues on the planned [S] page and more Beyond Canon merch. We won't be getting an upd8 for December, but they will be running the Patreon. The next upd8 looks like it might be as late as February.
That's all unfortunate. But I fully support if the team wants to take a well earned holiday.
Upd8
Tavvy has decided to join Yiffy on an adventure. This can't possibly end well. His attempts at being her lackey have so far landed him mostly in trouble. And there's a heap of trouble brewing on the soon to be battlefield.
Yeah that's not happening.
Heh! Harry brought the trail mix.
Oh wow. And oh no!
OH NO!!!
That can't possibly count as Heroic though. Getting sniped while performing a purely tactical role is not a hero's end. Still, Rose is probably glad the kids aren't seeing that.
And button.
Interesting view to cut to.
Again, I don't think this will count as Heroic for anyone. But a lot of people are about to die. And let's not forget, none of the trolls currently outside for the Plot Point are God Tiers. This is bad. This is really bad. This is the kind of moment that calls for an extreme, deus ex machina, like the Plot Point has the potential for.
But we're not getting to see it yet.
Edit: @vriedi reminded me that Meenah is a God Tier. Though this does make me wonder, what happens when a dead God Tier dies?
Orange curtains.
Okay! Legitimately fantastic Psyche Out. They actually got me pretty good there.
Okay, we have a new troll it I think.
gavageCunctation is messaging Vrissy. Though that doesn't necessarily tell us much, except that a new player may have entered the drama.
And they're "negging" Vrissy. So this troll clearly sees themselves as a "player" too.
We've got a "game" that's about to be played. A game being run by a TC. Now Gamzee is dead, but that doesn't mean he didn't setup something before Vriska killed him. Still, it's likely these are two completely new troll kids.
We've got a new AA too. So we might be seeing more troll descendants. After all, they used cloning to kick things off. This troll is typing in purple, but blood typing may not be universal anymore. I do find it interesting that we're continuing the nucleotide pairs though. They could have gone for a different motif. Maybe they're trying to symbolize that these are potential paradox clones for a new session?
AA is apparently our chronic auspistice for this group. And potentially our Seer, though we've had fake-outs on that before.
And our actual cliffhanger ending is this new GC's computer exploding.
So yeah. Something has to happen for a lot of our beloved characters to not bite it. I'm also curious how Rose's vision of future events can come true if Jane has unleashed her weapon. But I mentioned last time that Rose is playing a dangerous game here. I don't think any of our God Tiers are in trouble, and I'm pretty sure the Plot Point is fine.
I'm wondering if this is how Calliope ends up sacrificing themself, if Rose was even correct there. Either way, this a dark ending for the year on a community that's already seen some dark endings.
*Returns to flop*
#live blogging#liveblogging#live blog#liveblog#homestuck#homestuck liveblog#homestuck upd8#homestuck spoilers#homestuck 2#homestuck 2 upd8#homestuck 2 beyond canon#homestuck 2 spoilers#homestuck beyond canon upd8#homestuck beyond canon spoilers#homestuck beyond canon#hs#hsbc#hsupd8#hs upd8#hs spoilers#hsbcupd8#hsbc upd8#hsbc spoilers#hs2 spoilers#hs2#upd8#upd8 spoilers#update spoilers#update#beyond canon
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.
there are many reasons for which the za/um story fucks me up, but I still think most people talking about it can't really understand the gnarly entanglement and the extremes that a truly rancid and toxic work environment in which driven people who want to tell meaningful things through videogames, and the mixture of that with deadened corporate interests, can push the same people to get lost into.
I do believe there were a lot of flaws in the way it may have been presented to the public before, but I think people are a little quick to think they themselves would have extracted the correct and pure and pristine conclusions out of a situation that looks like such an absolute loaded clusterfuck.
gamedev can be so fucking messy, and things can be both very simple and painfully complicated and impossible to ever rub fully clean too. I don't even know if it's possible to convey how insane you can feel in such a context if you didn't live through it yourself honestly.
of course, capital interests are what matter and they do rot everything, and that creatives were robbed of their own world is beyond heartbreaking and awful, and no matter what anyone did or didn't do this should have never happened. this should be centered and highlighted. but I think people who tried to remember the team beyond the core of auteurs (that I respect beyond words, let's be super clear here) and how they experienced the whole ordeal were also not wrong to try to do that, even if it was done in a very clumsy and hurtful way, and navigated a minefield with the grace of a drunk elephant and served really disgusting interests in the process.
but the way you get rolled over and chewed on and used as a pawn and thrown out when no longer useful when you are the little guy stuck in a battle of giants, can be very very bad and no fun at all, and the audience tend not to give a damn about those people without the Big Names and Big Responsibilities, which do faciliate this kind of careless abuse that doesn't even register as abuse in the head of these people. And I think it's important to have the little guy's perspective centered too every once in a while, even if it does complicate things on a human level.
I don't know. It's just a steaming pile of garbage from top to bottom.
#thoughts#gamedev#za/um badness#what matters is ultimately corporate interests obviously and it's what should be highlighted#but the internal web of pain and resentment and lies and dripping toxicity can be really really difficult to parse away from a Clean Truth#and when you want to make sure everybody gets a voice#it's very easy to make choices that aren't ideal#but there are situations in which if you talk the result is bad#if you don't talk the result is less bad but also you completely ignored your own pain for the narrative to get simplified#for the sake of the clarity of Truth and Justice#I don't know.#yeah I don't know it's just awful#and I think most people don't understand how bad and messy it can all get#again maybe it's projection but. yeah. I don't know.#I just really don't like the way it's being talked about online
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JUST WHEN THE WERE STARTING TO GET ALONG AGAIN IT'S SO OVER I'M GONNA LOSE IT
#WORST DECISION EVER TO LIKE THIS SHIP THEY CAN NEVER GIVE ME A BREAK#*explotes them*#his episode made me think more about whatever they have going on tbh#i never expected them to actually acknowledge how idolized Matakara's view on Arajin was#also i kinda hope Arajin realizes that he also projects his own delusions towards Mahoro#not sure if it will happen tho😭😭😭#but I really liked that parallel I don't know why I didn't notice it earlier u_u#currently my opinion on ar*jin is neutral#i get why many people hate him more after this episode#but I want to wait and see how his character wraps up before saying anything but i don't dislike him#or maybe i just got used to his character partially because he reminds me of Ataru and I really like that guy#but yeah I think maybe in the end Mata and Ara will reconcile and become friends again...or maybe not who knows :3#bucchigiri?!#bucchigiri#arajin tomoshibi#matakara asamine#MaJin#MataJin#AraMata#anime#live kaii reaction#kaiicore#*les priva de derechos*
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Alrighty!
poll results! thank you to everyone who voted on this!
admittedly, when I saw at one point the total votes got to 66, I got a bit worried it would end in a three way tie (kinda the reason I reblogged this poll like three times, eh heheh...)
then let's see...
to the 42 of y'all who voted for Jeremy congrats!
to the 19 who chose Clint, I see the vision, but y'all got outshined
and to the 7 of you who voted Duke, mhm mhm very much "he's babygirl" vibes, such a shame y'all got rare taste in men
now then, time to conceptualize this new project
stay tuned!
#thank you once again to everyone who voted!#i don't know how everyone will react to the end result of what i plan on doing#maybe y'all will be surprised#or maybe y'all will be like 'yeah‚ this was kind of expected'#either way‚ i should try to practice rendering#hmmm...#bitchboi rambles#jeremy begay#echo vn#echo project#yeah...
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what's with the hate for uzi's dad
do i really have to spell it out
#he left her for dead EPISODE ONE#like#yeah there was some hesitance#but he still did it!#not to mention like the moment uzi finally puts her walls down for him#he takes that as a sign that it's okay to go in her room and touch her shit#granted yes he was worried her but i mean too little too late and you could've gone about it another way#idk#i was literally thinking about uzi's and khan's dynamic the other night#maybe i'll write something about it cause#it IS interesting to me#like a father and daughter who both clearly need each other after moms death#but both don't know HOW to help/rely on each other#nori's 'death' really fucked them up and they both didn't know how to cope in a healthy way#edit: i think khan projected everything he adored/loved about nori onto uzi and when she didn't meet those expectations#he turned all his focus away from her taking it as her just needing time to deal with nori's death#and then i guess he just forgot to check up on her again
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i'm so glad i won't be working with my pi after this month. i think i've reached my limit. i just can't deal with her anymore
#she said 'oh idk if i can make it to your thesis'#SHE IS ON MY THESIS COMMITTEE. SHE'S KNOWN ABOUT THIS FOR A YEARRRRRR#she said she might be on vacation w her bf... instead of going to my fucking thesis defense.#there was a special vote just so she could be on my committee. wdym you have to go on vacation#ALSO i've been asking her to check my calculations for a thing for MONTHS#and she still hasn't. but she made me present on it in front of a bunch of people.#i'd like to note that this calculation is like. the point of my thesis. and she hasn't even bothered to look at it#she forced the interns to work 50 hours last week. they're only being paid for 40.#she hasn't read any part of my thesis... others have but they don't know the details like she does#i told her to read my fucking thesis and she said she had and that it 'looked good'#what does that mean. WHAT does that mean. how do you have no comments. on my thesis. that determines whether i graduate#and then she said i'm ''irresponsible'' bc i went to a concert???#like it didn't affect anything. i showed up to work on time. i completed everything i meant to.#but i guess going to one concert is like. unacceptable.#i'm sooooo sorry i decided to go have fun for one night instead of agonizing about my thesis (that again. she hasn't read)#she asked if i want to give a talk at the new place she got hired at but she now works for fus#which is a incredibly conservative homophobic private catholic university. i've never heard anything positive about it#like they're legally allowed to discriminate against lgbt people... does she know what i fucking look like????#she's so so conservative but she only interacts with other conservative catholics#and doesn't understand how fucking vile her views are. and she wonders why people don't like her#like maybe she should shut the fuck up about how she thinks abortion is a sin at work!!#she once said 'the only time i feel uncomfortable in my skin is when i talk about being a conservative catholic at work'#AND THEN SHE SAID 'it really makes me understand how hijabis feel'#IN FRONT OF MY HIJABI COLLEAGUE. HELLO???? like she is not persecuted for being a conservative catholic#i literally started laughing when she said that. i think i said 'please get real'. and she's still mad#anyway. my colleague decided to no longer work with my pi. idk if it was bc of that comment#she mentioned that once i leave there won't be anyone who understands the data on the project anymore#like yeah. maybe you should've looked at the data. like at all#and not had an unpaid master's student do literally all the work for you
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[ 𝚑𝚒𝚖𝚞𝚛𝚊 𝚛𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚊'𝚜 𝚝𝟸 𝚟𝚘𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚍𝚛𝚊𝚖𝚊 ] 𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚛
and with this, we're finally done with all the second trial's mvs and vds! woooo! this trial surely was. something.
after reina's vd, there's gonna be two post-t2 vds (similar to this trial having two pre-t2 vds), the first one will be jackalope explaining some stuff (and miki finally getting to meet him) and the third guard's full name reveal and the second one will be about everyone's second trial verdicts.
Warnings for Reina's VD: None
Warnings for Reina's MV: None
(sounds of footsteps)
Miki: "It's Himura-san's turn already.."
Miki: "This trial has been so stressful and we also have to judge everyone later.."
Miki: "Wait-"
(footsteps stop)
Miki: ".. Will Eiji-san even be able to judge someone this time?"
Miki: ".. I don't think he will. No, actually, it would be better for his health if he didn't participate in the trial this time."
Miki: "But if he can't vote, then-"
Miki: ...
Miki: .. Hehe..
Miki: W-wait, why am I-
Miki: Why am I.. laughing?
Miki: I should feel sorry for him. I should hope that he gets better.
Miki: .. What has this place done to me?
Miki: Wait, is that-
(sounds of other person's footsteps)
Miki: Huh?..
Miki: W-who's there?!
Miki: "Is it one of the prisoners?.."
???: Calm down, calm down!
???: Here, do you recognize me now?
Miki: .. Are you..
Miki: Hiyuu-san?
Hiyuu: Yeah, that's me.
Hiyuu: Sorry for scaring you like that, haha.
Hiyuu: Well, at least now we finally get to meet each other in person!
Hiyuu: Ah, right, I should probably take this off..
Miki: What-
(sounds of Hiyuu taking his mask off)
Hiyuu: Here we go.
Hiyuu: Wow, breathing sure feels easier now.
Miki: ...
Hiyuu: Hm? Is there something wrong with my face?
Hiyuu: Hold on, let me-
Hiyuu: .. Ahaha, I still have some ice cream left on my face..
Hiyuu: I should wipe it off..
Hiyuu: Wait, do I even have anything to wipe it off with-
(sounds of Hiyuu talking to himself in the background)
Miki: "CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE CUTE-"
Hiyuu: Is everything okay, Miki-san?
Miki: I'M FINE!
Miki: .. Oh my god, sorry, that was so loud, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry-
Hiyuu: Don't worry, I just wanted to make sure you're alright, haha.
Hiyuu: I want to help you with interrogating the tenth prisoner, is that okay with you?
Miki: Y-yes, sure! Interrogations can be.. very tiring..
Miki: Ah, but only if you're okay with that-
Miki: H-huh?
(a sound of Hiyuu putting his hand on Miki's head)
Hiyuu: I left my room exactly because I wanted to help you. So of course I'm okay with that.
Miki: O-oh..
Miki: Wait, didn't you say that you can't leave your room?
Hiyuu: Ah, about that..
Hiyuu: That rabbit thing told me I can't leave my room, so I assumed that the door was locked, but when I tried to open it, I didn't have any trouble with it.
Hiyuu: So, uh, I guess he was just messing with me, haha..
Hiyuu: Or maybe I was supposed to interpret his words differently..
Miki: .. Rabbit thing?
Hiyuu: Y-you didn't meet him yet?..
Miki: N-no??
Hiyuu: .. Now I feel awkward.
Hiyuu: Okay, let's go interrogate the tenth prisoner now, haha!~..
Miki: "Oh no, is he going to turn out to be a weird guy too.."
Miki: "But he's still cute.."
Miki: .. You remind me of someone, to be honest.
Hiyuu: Hm? What did you say?
Miki: N-nothing!
Miki: "I'm probably just ovethinking it.. It must be a coincidence.."
Miki: "But they look and act so.. similar.."
Miki: Wait, Hiyuu-san, do you even know how to interrogate prisoners?
Hiyuu: I have watched recordings of your interrogations, so yeah, I know some stuff.
Miki: W-we were being recorded?..
Hiyuu: Of course you were.
Hiyuu: Now, are you ready for the final interrogation? We're already here.
Miki: ...
Miki: *nods*
Hiyuu: Great. Excited to work with you, partner~
(the door opens)
Reina: Ah, there you are-
Reina: Wait, what?
Miki: U-um, Himura-san, Eiji-san had to be replaced, I mean, not exactly replaced, but-
Hiyuu: Hello there. You're Reina-san, right?
Reina: .. (to Miki) I'm assuming you know what's going on here.
Miki: .. I know that better than anyone.
Reina: So, it's my turn now, huh?
Reina: Let's go then, yay..
Miki: *sits down* You don't really sound that enthusiastic, you know?
Reina: Really? Sorry. I got tired of waiting for you, haha..
Miki: .. What happened to you, Himura-san?
Reina: You have to be more specific here, Guard 002-san.
Miki: .. You used to call me "Miki-chan" before.
Reina: Well, I thought we were friends, Guard 002-san. I thought we were gonna get along.
Reina: But I was wrong.
Hiyuu: .. Did something happen between you two?
Miki: I-I don't think so?
Miki: Himura-san, did I do something wrong? If so, please tell me-
Reina: Oh, I'm gonna tell you.
Reina: Innocent verdict, baby! Woooo!
Reina: *laughs*
Reina: *takes a breath*
Reina: What the hell, Miki-chan. What, do you want me to sing a whole villain song for you or something-
Reina: Oh, wait, you have my video for that.
Reina: Then why was I still forgiven, huh?
Miki: Because..
Miki: Um..
Hiyuu: Because the guards had their own reasons for that. And who exactly are you to question their judgement?
Miki: H-huh?
Reina: Wow, you're a smart guy, aren't you?
Reina: Well, I'm going to start sounding real smart right now too.
Reina: ...
Reina: (her voice sounds more emotionless now) Guard 002-san, what did I tell you last time?
Miki: Y-you mean the serial killer part?
Reina: Exactly. The "serial killer part".
Reina: Now, what are you supposed to do with serial killers?
Miki: .. P-punish-
Reina: That's right. Punish them.
Reina: But I still wasn't punished.
Reina: Would you say that it was a good decision? A wise one? A morally correct one?
Reina: And I have a lot of questions about the guilty prisoners too.
(sounds of Reina standing up and walking around)
Reina: Shun, who is now this close to just breaking Kei and turning him into a mindless puppet.. was voted innocent.
Reina: Akio, who always said that his crime wasn't his fault, obviously trying to shift the blame, but who still mostly was just a nerdy 16 year old obsessed with attention, was voted guilty and now he looks like he can die at any second.
Miki: W-we had our-
Reina: Eiko, who feels no remorse for her crime at all and can easily tell anyone all the details if they just ask, was voted innocent.
Miki: But we-
Reina: And just a reminder, you don't know ANYTHING about Kei's murder, but you still voted him guilty-
Miki: WE HAD OUR REASONS, NOW SIT DOWN!
Reina: ...
Reina: *sits down*
Hiyuu: I don't think you understand how this whole system works, Reina-san.
Reina: Well, do you understand it then?
Hiyuu: Kind of.
Hiyuu: I was told that we are allowed to judge prisoners based on.. literally anything.
Hiyuu: So if you thought that our decisions have to be nothing but morally correct.. Sorry to disappoint you.
Reina: .. "Literally anything"?
Hiyuu: Yeah. It's possible that someone was forgiven just because one or both guards find them cute or attractive.
Reina: ...
Reina: Haha..
Reina: .. I don't have any energy left for all of this.
Reina: ...
Miki: .. A-are you okay, Himura-san-
Reina: So, I don't sound that enthusiastic anymore, Guard 002-san?
Reina: Well, as you can see, I'm not exactly satisfied with my verdict.
Reina: And I'm gonna be honest, I'm getting tired of the whole "most dangerous prisoner" act myself and I can see that it's not convincing enough.
Reina: So yeah, the show's over.
Hiyuu: Reina-san, do you want to be punished that badly?
Reina: Oh, I wanted it more than anything.
Reina: If I could, I would've just asked you to execute me even before the second trial starts.
Reina: But now..
Reina: It's a bit more complicated than that.
Reina: *laughs* But wow, I can't believe this. We're really letting someone like you judge us.
Reina: What, are you gonna vote me guilty now? Are you gonna vote me guilty because I'm not a "I'm the cutest serial killer ever!" type of girl anymore?
Reina: And I really thought you're going to still like me even after I show you my real self! You're breaking my heart, Miki-chan.
Hiyuu: When you say "It's more complicated than that"..
Hiyuu: What do you mean by that?
Reina: Oh, right. What I mean by that is..
Reina: I can't let you two..
Reina: Or three?
Reina: Anyway, I can't let you all judge me and the other prisoners.
Reina: I already know what I deserve and what my verdict should be like. Who are you to tell me what to do and who I am?
Miki: W-well, um, we're the guards-
Hiyuu: Hold on, Miki-san.
Hiyuu: Okay, but what will you even do to stop us?
Reina: You know what's really bothering me about this whole situation?
Reina: .. You all aren't even trying to figure out what's going on.
Reina: How can you accept your new reality so easily?
Reina: Or is it because you hated your old reality so much that you were okay with anything?
Miki: ...
Miki: .. A-and what if we did?
Miki: I had my worries about this place. Of course I was afraid at first.
Miki: But now.. It feels like home.
Hiyuu: I don't really hate this place either.
Reina: .. I feel sorry for both of you.
Reina: But fine, whatever, I'm not going to share anything with you then.
Miki: What do you mean by "anything"?
Reina: .. I have some theories about this place.
Reina: And, um..
Reina: How it works.
Miki: !
Reina: But I doubt that you two are interested, so-
Hiyuu: No, no, I'm curious. Come on, share with us.
Miki: But we don't have much time-
Reina: Well, let's see..
Miki: "Wait, didn't she just say she's not gonna tell us anything?"
Reina: .. So, we have.. what, three guards now?
Reina: (to Hiyuu) Hey, can you tell me where have you been all this time? Why didn't we get to meet you sooner?
Hiyuu: .. I was asleep.
Reina: And when did you wake up?
Hiyuu: I think it was shortly after the first trial's verdicts were announced? But why?
Reina: .. Three guilty prisoners.
Miki: Huh?
Reina: There was only three guilty prisoners. Guard 001-san was the one who wanted to vote everyone guilty.
Reina: (to Hiyuu) And you woke up after Guard 001-san had lost that round.
Reina: .. They're just going to keep switching you all until they get bored.
Miki: Who? Who are you talking about??
Reina: No idea.
Reina: I don't even know how many guards they actually have.
Reina: .. I don't even know how many prisoners we actually have.
Miki: .. W-what does that mean, Himura-san?
Reina: Oh, I don't know.
Reina: Maybe something like..
Reina: .. One of us isn't actually a prisoner?
Miki: Wh-
Reina: Anyway, the clock is ticking, right?
Reina: So, wanna talk about my crime?
Hiyuu: That was a sudden change of topic..
Miki: But Himura-san-
Hiyuu: Miki-san, please, let's talk about Reina-san's crime now.
Hiyuu: .. If we don't, I'm afraid I will end up wasting all my energy soon and I don't want that. I want to be useful to you.
Miki: .. Himura-san, do you have anything to say about your murder?
Reina: I guess I do.
Reina: But I wanna ask, what did you learn about it from my video?
Miki: .. I guess you really were a criminal in a way, but..
Miki: .. We never saw you actually kill anyone.
Reina: .. Haha.
Hiyuu: What's so funny, Reina-san?
Reina: So you haven't seen that part either.. Interesting.
Reina: Hey, but you saw, like, my victim or something?
Miki: .. I guess we did.
Miki: But we didn't see all the details, so we don't know what your victim actually looked like.
Reina: I see..
Reina: He was completely covered in blood, of course, you wouldn't be able to see it, haha..
Miki: .. You were laughing in your video too, Himura-san.
Reina: Really?
Miki: And crying. Both at the same time.
Reina: ...
Reina: Well, how else was I supposed to react after I saw my little brother's corpse?
Reina: H-he came there because of me too, haha.. He always was such an idiot..
Miki: !
Miki: LITTLE BROTHER?!
(bell rings, machinery sounds)
Miki: Himura-san, I'm begging you, please, tell us more!
Hiyuu: Miki-san, time's up. Let's calm down and extract the video-
Miki: BE A GOOD PARTNER, HIYUU-SAN, AND SHUT UP FOR A SECOND!
Miki: .. Your victim was your little brother, Himura-san?
Reina: Haha, what, now you're going to vote me guilty this time?
Reina: You don't want to save me anymore?
Miki: ...
Miki: *starts crying*
Hiyuu: Miki-san, please, can you take a deep breath for me? Here, again, let's calm down..
Hiyuu: You're shaking.. Let's talk about it later, when we're done with this.
Hiyuu: I already have all the information we need. It was me who interrogated everyone yesterday, remember?
Hiyuu: Also, we're going to watch the video together, so we'll see everything that we have to know-
Miki: .. Himura-san, what are you doing?
Miki: HIMURA-SAN?!
(sounds of Reina throwing something and that thing falling on the floor)
Reina: Ugh, didn't work..
Reina: Should've seen this coming.
Hiyuu: .. Reina-san, did you just try to break the video extracting machine?
Reina: Yeah, kinda. More like wanted to see if that thing can even be broken.
Miki: .. You tried to break it with your shoe.
Reina: Yeah. I'm an idiot, just like my brother, haha.
Miki: ...
(sounds of Miki's slow footsteps)
Hiyuu: Miki-san, are you sure you can do this? If you need any help-
Miki: I can. Thank you.
Reina: Well, what's it gonna be this time, everyone's savior?
Miki: .. Prisoner 010, Reina, please, sing your sins.
42% ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓░░░░░░░░░░░░ 100%
[MV Description]
The video starts with little Reina (most likely ten years old), sitting in her room and talking to her toys. Everything is black and white and it looks like an old silent movie. We can't hear Reina's voice, we can only hear the music and how it's slowly becoming more and more repetitive. Reina looks happy at first, but then she starts getting tired and when the music becomes almost unbearable to listen to, she throws all the toys off her bed.
It turns out that it really was a scene from a movie and now someone is interviewing little Reina and she's still smiling and overall looks like a very happy child.
"Look at me, the little star of the show
Aren't you proud of me? Look at me! I'm such a good girl!
Except I don't feel anything at all
I'm not even proud of myself"
The scene changes and now she's older, she's still being interviewed, but now she looks and acts more like a "problem child": she doesn't want to be there and she makes sure everyone knows it and her parents find her embarrassing.
"Oh no, it looks like your little star has gone wild
She's rude, she's violent, she's going crazy
Except she doesn't feel anything at all
She's not even proud of herself"
Now we can see Reina and her parents going to see her new movie together and when it starts, it has even darker colors than the first one.
"I keep achieving goals, I keep making accomplishments
But this story isn't going anywhere
Will my character ever change for the better?
No motivation, no backstory, no reason for me to grow"
Reina just sits there with her parents and watches her character kill so many people on screen without showing any signs of regret, but even though Reina looks bored at first, when you look closer, you can see that she's actually.. uncomfortable with that kind of role.
"Is this who I am? Is this who I'm supposed to be?
The villain of this story was me all along
At least that's what I thought
But it looks like you see me in a different way"
Her parents eventually leave without even watching the full movie, meanwhile Reina stays and sees her character finding a dead body that we can't see clearly, but this is the first time when her character actually looks scared. Reina stands up from her chair, looks like she doesn't remember making that face in that scene. Actually, she's not sure if this movie even had a scene like that, she doesn't remember filming it.
Reina continues watching the movie and she can see how her character keeps getting more and more emotional and how she yells at one of her "partners in crime" and throws her weapon on the ground. Reina turns around to see all people in the cinema enjoying the movie a lot more now. It looks like they really like the development this character is getting.
"Ah, so that's how it is
Am I a hero in your eyes now?
Have you forgiven me already?
You don't even know anything about me, how can you say those words so easily?"
Reina decides to leave, but before she does that, her character looks right at her and nods. Reina nods back with anger and hatred in her eyes and right when she leaves and closes the door behind her, everything starts to burn.
The whole cinema is on fire now. Her character sees everyone running and screaming and smiles while trying to hide the dead body from earlier, meanwhile Reina sits on a nearby bench and watches the cinema burn to the ground.
"So, who will tell this story: me or you?
Will you rewrite everything, will you decide how it ends?
I'm not against that, I just want you to know
You won't be able to forgive me until I forgive myself"
She looks relieved and she sighs while looking at the night sky.
#a note about the honorifics: since reina isn't putting on an act anymore she just calls everyone by their first names without -kun or -chan#minus miki and eiji (and hiyuu in the future) but she uses them in kind of.. mocking way maybe?#listen i didn't even try to make this vd so miki x reina (mikirei?? reimiki??) but here we are#no but they have potential. i can see it i can see it#something something both of us don't know how to cope with our guilt and we blame ourselves for what happened to our little brothers#and both of us have different coping mechanisms and one of us is trying to take all the blame and portray herself as the villain#while the other one is trying to save everyone but uses questionable methods and tries to distract herself from her own feelings of guilt#and also one of us is very >:3 (at least on the outside) while the other one is very >///< (again at least on the outside)#yeah reina's mv is kinda short but i also think it fits? i imagine her video actually being the shortest one (like double)#and after all she DID try to break the machine :)#🎤 voice dramas! 🎤#🌼guard 002: andou miki 🌼#🎭prisoner 010: himura reina🎭#milgram#milgram oc#ocgram#milgram project#(also a note: one of the reasons why there's also a fire in reina's mv is because i had this idea in my head that if all mvs were watched-#in order akio's mv also starts with a fire so it's like. you get it. it'd be like a loop. it'd be fun)
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Song of the Day: March 26
"Songs About Rain" by Gary Allan
#song of the day#you might think that this is the opposite of 'Groovy Little Summer Song' but nope! closer to same because (drumroll)#they are one of the very best categories of thing: Country Songs About Country Songs#I love them. I adore them#'Songs About Rain' is one of the strongest and best examples of type I have (also 'Cheatin Songs' by Midland. impeccable)#'and it sure ain't easin my pain / all these songs like / Rainy Night in Georgia / Kentucky Rain#Here Comes That Rainy Day Feelin Again / Blues Eyes Cryin in the Early Mornin Rain#they go on and on and there's no two the same / oh it would be easy to blame / all these songs about rain'#what a gift. what a delight. legitimately hard to sing this song in a mournful voice because it makes me so damn happy#anyway as you might glean from how this is posting at 3 pm my time: my sleep schedule is /fucked/#I did have part of the bad conversation with my boss on Monday (immediately followed by garden times#which so overtook me that I spoke only about the garden and good spring feeling in my song post. what a blessing the garden is)#but mostly what happened is I said 'hey it is technically possible for me to make this but it will not help it will not do anything useful'#and my boss said 'but you can make it' and I said 'yes but we shouldn't. it will be a waste of time' and she said 'make it by Thursday'#and I said 'I absolutely cannot make it by Thursday. if I finish instead this better thing I've already been working on--'#and she said 'no we don't care about that thing. make part of the useless thing. by Thursday morning'#and I said 'if I bring you part of the useless thing and part of the good thing and I directly compare them in front of you--'#and she said 'we'll look at whatever you have Thursday morning but it's the useless thing we care about'#so the meeting is scheduled and I'm going to plead for the life of my better thing and probably the best I'll get is permission to do both#which is. I mean the useless thing is going to be a time-waster for sure but at least it won't be actively detrimental to anything?#it'll be fine I'll make it be fine. the inherent problems of when your boss doesn't actually know what you do for them I guess :/#(also maybe. maybe if it comes down to it. maybe I'll just make the good thing for myself and use it to make my own life better#and someday maybe they'll ask for a project that works and then I'll be able to dramatically unveil it but either way I'll benefit from it#hmm maybe yeah)
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i can't find the post now so maybe i've made it up entirely, who's to say, but i feel like i remember seeing a post about saccharina saying that she expects too much for the rest of the Rocks to treat her like family, but now that i'm actually watching the season, dude, she says multiple times that she doesn't care if they treat her like Family, she really just wants them to be decent to her and they refuse to even grant her that much
#N posts stuff#like the big confrontation i'm at now is bc Saccharina made a move to Help Ruby in this fight and then when she mentions it verbally#Ruby responds to that by entertaining the notion of shoving Saccharina off a cliff bc it pisses her off so much to acknowledge that#<- that's not Saccharina demanding everyone play 'happy family' that's her helping an ally and getting spit on for it#if Ruby and Amathar don't want to interface with Saccharina as family they shouldn't have to; but that doesn't mean that they get#to shit on HER for representing obligation they don't want; they could Just Be Civil to her instead#and ruby saying 'you can be my sister or my queen but you can't have both' when saccharina has Reiterated that she doesn't even Want#to be a queen is like. again i get where Ruby is coming from this is not a bash on her emotional state so much as it is an attempt#to comment on fan Reactions to the dynamics here - ruby is Putting saccharina in a dichotomy she does not want to be in and is#Projecting a dynamic that does not inherently exist; saccharina wasn't looking for a sister in that moment she was just asking for#an Acknowledgement of her efforts and asking someone else to give her some effort back; the way any teammate would want#and yeah when ruby comes up to her and doesn't apologize just says 'you're asking too much of me' i don't think saccharina saying#'hey i get that but i was truly Excited to meet you' is a demand for sisterhood; it's just 'i was really excited to meet you#and instead of being nice you're Just constantly shitting on me' -> that's a comment on why She's so fucked up about ruby's harshness#not a demand for ruby to start liking her; do you see what i mean? like am I making sense here? lol#i mean i still have a few eps left maybe there's still some conversations i haven't seen yet but. you know
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checks watch like oh guess it’s time for my monthly “is medieval studies right because greek is right there” breakdown
#reed.txt#i'm going through it especially with this odyssey musical and the two new iliad translations and i'm just#gnawing on table legs#i need to get back to my iliad poetry project maybe that'll help get this to knock it the fuck off#the thing keeping me from greek is the INTENSIVE language learning i would have to undergo but also...........#i would like to write fifteen thousand words on the homeric works............#i dunno i keep thinking about how. i have more solid ideas for a thesis outside of medieval studies.#except for medieval studies i could get knee deep in the divine comedy so like. u know.#ANYWAY. yeah. here we are. yet again. pain and suffering.#also medieval studies. i could work with the manuscripts like i want to.#greek i feel like i would be relegated to academia which isn't BAD but i don't. know it that's entirely what i want.#it's been a Rough couple of days okay we're just. i am just sitting here.
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Me: anyway here's the horror book I'm writing and-
Also me: You hate horror? You like never watch horror movies because you're scared of getting jump scared.
Me: leave me alone
#The entirety of my horror exposure is one of the Scary Movies and Wilder Girls by Rory Power and the It Lives series on Choices#One day I'll watch the X trilogy. But I am a little loser who's terrified of getting jump scared babey#I've heard The Craft refered to as horror but I don't really see it. It's just supernatural.#I should watch Jennifer's body...#My friends are obsessing over Maxxxine and I'm just like I wish I was excited with y'all it genuinely seems like a good movie#I feel like supernatural horror is the only kind I could get into. Like I def probably wouldn't like midsommer#Or slashers either. Wait is the X trilogy slasher? I think it is#Hmmm#Ughh I also wanna watch cabin fever but I also feel like I wouldn't like that one... I don't know if it's supernatural but not sure I'd lik#The whole like dying via virus type thing#Wait a second. That's just fucking Wilder Girls.#Hmmmmmm maybe I'll watch Cabin Fever.#I need a friend to hold my hand while I finally expose myself to horror movies ughhhh#Also if y'all haven't read Wilder Girls literally read it#I read it when it first came out when I was 14 and I had to pick an independent reading project book from the school library#And they had just gotten it in and the cover was soooo pretty I had to pick it up and yeah that book fucked me up y'all#I should read it again......#I love love love Wilder Girls y'all.#My sister loves horror movies however I would not want to watch them with her she would be INSUFFERABLE#my posts#aberdeen jack's precious little life#(now you may be wondering: Jack if you really don't think you'd like the premise of Cabin Fever why do you want to watch it. My answer?#Uhhhhhhhh I'm insufferable. Rider Strong is in it. Next question)#Ignore that last tag I'm just being annoying
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From a different blog where I sent this as an anon ask: It feels like there were different writers for each section of the game, and none of them talked to each other, so they just kept the plot and story are barebones as possible. You also notice that Zora's domain had the worst writing in terms of continuity, and Rito had the best. The story Zelda goes through is just really confusing, and feels pointless because it goes in circles, it's like the writers had actually no idea what to do. I had talked to that blog owner for like a few weeks by then, and we'd come to the conclusion about why totk's story feels so... hamfisted and empty.
Hey!
So the thing is: it's generally how most AAA writing happens (at least in western settings, I think it's also how China tend to operate as well --but not so sure about Japan tbh, so take my reply with a grain of salt). You assemble a team of writers (sometimes they are also quest designer and/or level designers, sometimes they are separate people, it completely depends on the company and the project), you brief them on the general vision from the directors so you get a sense of what's the pitch/goal and what's the budget, and then you are assigned on either a questline, a character, or a "region" in open world games.
Then you are mostly on your own and very much funneled onto your specific tasks, and only tangientially in contact with what the other groups are doing. Sometimes you have to check on with them for either consistency, or to make sure what information you introduce when, or you need to double-check what the gameplay thing actually does... But the thing is, you generally see the full details of what the others have been working on pretty late. Sometimes you get companies that do writer's room and table readings where you get to workshop each other's work as it's being written/whiteboxed, but it doesn't happen systematically. Even with games that put on a lot of weight on their narrative being their strong suit!
(which is kind of dumb, we should 100% do that more just because... it's fun, it fosters trust and a sense of accomplishement and progress, people bond over the hardships, you get perspectives you wouldn't have gotten otherwise, and also it feels much better than having an overworked and/or stressed out editor/director flatten or rewrite everything without asking for your input at the last second :) :) :) )
So anyway! All of that jazz to say that it's a pretty common practice, and it hardly makes or breaks an open-world game usually. It will limit the amount of interconnection for sure, but generally never to the point that you reject the concept of interconnection and character writing altogether.
Which is why I feel like what's happening with TotK is more a case of... I don't know, an extremely, needlessly restrictive framing put in place from the beginning by directors/producers who were afraid of the complexity going out of hand and wanting to rely on BotW's workflow instead of figuring out a new one, and/or a case of the narration going out of hand while development happened, which led to a drastic simplification and rewriting pretty late in the production cycle. It's kind of my leading theory, one I'm partially basing on the fact that they used the COVID excuse when they said the game was going to be late, and I haven't heard of a single production that used the COVID excuse to justify a delay not having *major* problems under the hood --like it took maybe 2 weeks for the game industry to adjust to COVID, tops.
Again, it's speculation! I am pretty unfamiliar with how things are done in Japan when it comes to game production, so it might all be very biased in a bad way. But, just giving my two cents!
#asks#totk#totk critical#when will my brain return from the imprisoning war...#game dev#thanks for the ask!!#I mean maybe there were games genuinely impacted by COVID I don't know#but yeah it does make me very skeptical in general#I got very HMMMM when I heard about this initially#glad the game is still *very good* in spite of that specific aspect#but wondering if it's where things took the blunt of the problems#(to be honest the narrative department is very often where the drama happens)#and they were like “it's fine our game loop is so strong people won't even notice” and they were correct#again might be speculation + projection but#yea
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I want a giant brown bunny... but... but too much!
The only one I found was like $158 USD... it was just about 5 foot tall! It literally was like looking at what I wanted to make but realized I didn't have enough stuffing for!
And one that was like 3 feet tall was $100...
Like yes I know materials and time is money but I can still complain! Why fabric gotta be so much! And so messy! (The ones with faux fur or of the like. Like whyyyyyy!!!!) Also why is cotton and stuffing so much too! And you get enough for maybe only one 2 foot plushie!
(I ran out of tagging space... 30 the limit sadly. But I had more to say but maybe later I'll do a bigger post on that all.)
#I'm complaining.#because why does fun things gotta be so much!!!!!#Honestly though if a person who makes plushies by hand ever wanted to hire someone to just cut and draw the design onto fabric I would do it#or even for clothing. I like cutting things. and I can do it fast.#hence me having like three hand made plushies in a bag#two that are just hanging out#and a pair of pants.#all from 1 full school year worth of time. though in two different school years. and I also wasn't in the one technically but I had no other#class to be at as there was no room elsewhere and I took a bus so I literally could not just skip the bus either and it was the first class.#so I was lucky enough the teacher liked me and knew I was a good student. so actually minus like a week or two as I did sit outside for tw#twoish weeks before my friend practically forced me into their class without being in it on the records.#yeah I enjoyed it as I was allowed to chill... actually minus like 2 additional weeks from both half years. and maybe another 1 week and#that's about how much sewing I did and got all that done. though if you count back in 2020 I did sew a plushie monkey and a face mask...#then before 2020 I did sew like two small pillows. did a slight bit of embroidery... and then when I was like 8 to maybe 10 I sewed a bird#in sometime withing 8-10 and I may have done other sewing too...#damn. I did a lot of sewing compared to what people probably realize. like I sewed by hand and machine yet only embroidered by hand so far.#I'm not really allowed to use the sewing machines at my house sadly. so I only got to use it at school which honestly wasn't for too much#time as I mostly hand sewed everything with some exceptions...#wait I completely forgot I did all those sewing examples! and I had made a skirt... maybe two? and I had to help others with their stuff too#I already knew roughly how to use a sewing machine and well like two of the other students near me needed a lot of help I tried my best#however I did get frustrated but... I feel sorry for the one person as I wasn't really frustrated at them. I was just stressed and...#I tgink they still passed the class... actually that wasn't the only student I helped. qoth my friend's class I helped him and a few of the#nearby students. mainly because the teacher told them they could try coming to me for anything. also because my friend and I knew#I could help them too. however the one thing that was hard for me to sew was sometimes how to fix the issues they had... then again one had#a broken needle and that thing is hard to see unless you know what to look for because it's so tiny. so I did as best as I could.#sometimes they just needed helped threading honestly and well that's why I got frustrated with the one a few times but honestly I was just#worried about not finishing my own project... then when people used my machine... oh how much that urk me. we were assigned machines btw.#I wasn't too angry but I liked that seat and my box of my stuff was there and I don't really know much Spanish and the person sitting there#was spanish speaking so it was hard to communicate... didn't help that I was having a few if my mental troubles and on top of that an issue#with talking to people in general on my own... no I dunno the full reason why so I'm not making judgement calls.
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