#again maybe I’m just being ageist

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

I don’t think JA is evil or anything but it is odd to me that even ignoring the cheating lines in the peripheral of the album, everyone’s reaction to “he didn’t want to marry her and kept her in quiet stasis for years” is “ oh he’s not bad”.

Not even from a talking about celebrities perspective. The numerous references to wanting children and lost youth on the album just hits so badly in your 30s. And it’s odd to me that wasting someone’s time to that extent while resenting their success is looked at as being a good guy. It just seems like trivializing an issue women have

Anon, I don’t mean this directed at you specifically, just a blanket reminder for myself that I don’t really care to discuss these men generally because I don’t think they’re worth the time or space and frankly, I don’t know enough about them or care to to devote space to them on my little fan blog.

That being said, I think the reason my take on it is more… subdued is because, well, unfortunately I think the situation inferred from Taylor’s music is so, so common. I have several friends (two in particular I can think of) who went through situations so eerily similar to the one Taylor and Joe presumably went through. Which is not so much to say that I’m being parasocial, but more that all breakups are the same to quote @taylortruther. It’s not to condone the men’s behaviour, but more to say that even amongst “dull normals,” most of us have firsthand or at least secondhand experience in it and have had to navigate the same conflicts.

I have no opinion on whether Joe is good or bad because I don’t know anything about him beyond Taylor’s music and I have zero interest to learn anything further. I have my own guesses as to what went down, which are probably similar to what most people around here are assuming, and it’s again so painfully pedestrian, especially for people in their 30s. Which is obviously so painful as a woman of childbearing age who is hoping to have those things.

I do agree that there is a lot of trivializing of these issues for women in general, and especially for Taylor in general in TTPD. Not to be all “I/we understand Taylor better” about it all, but there’s soooooooo much in TTPD that I think *a lot* of people are not picking up, which is why i say over and over again that it really is the thirtysomething album. (Which is not to be ageist lol, it’s more a state of mind.) Like, while I am not someone who foresees having children or even getting married myself, most of my close friends are and have, and so much of what Taylor sings about literally and subtextually is so painfully obvious to me and palpable that I’ve been shocked at how it’s been glossed over. (Maybe you don’t fully understand it until you’re sitting on your friend’s bathroom floor consoling her as her entire life crumbles before her eyes? Or is that just me?) But, many of us here on tumblr dot com have picked up what she’s put down.

I think it comes down to: even with “good” guys (and particularly with those who aren’t), the whole family thing does *not* mean the same thing to them, because the time constraints just don’t apply to them. You’d hope your partner would feel why it was pressing to you, but unfortunately I can think of a lot of people even in my own life who’ve experienced this same conflict with their partners. Because men can drag their feet until they think it’s the “right” time in a way women simply can’t. I had a friend who had a very Joever-like breakup over that very issue and it’s so, so painful and can also drive them to make questionable choices in the immediate aftermath.

Then when you add the whole resentment/whatever issue on top of it… it’s… a lot.

[justagalwhowrites]

oh and you don't have to this post obvs but even macfrogs post contained points that were blatantly rooted in ageism. What do you mean the fandom is mostly twenty year olds? Do you not see the other groups that are thirsting after this man? I personally see a ton of "older" women and some men in this fandom. What do mean that personality traits like being frivolous are limited to twenty year olds? I wasn't aware that your personality completely changed at midnight on your 30th birthday. That response while well intended proved the OPs point by being ageist.

All the OP was asking for was writers to either show a 🌟little bit of respect 🌟 for older readers or simply leave them be.

Why is it so wrong to say stop with this don't worry this 30 year old doesn't have wrinkles so she's actually pretty (a real authors note btw) nonsense.

Because if it's fine you and other people to respond to OP, it should be fine fot her to express her opinion

Hi again!

When it came to the fandom age comments, that’s largely been my experience in this fandom. The vast majority of fandom spaces I’m in, I am one of the oldest if not the oldest one there at 34-years-old. That’s OK! At least in the spaces I’m in, no one is ever unkind about it, it just means I spend a lot of time on discord with people 10 years younger than me lol I don’t think the fandom is ENTIRELY young people but, by and large, most of the people I encounter here are in their 20s. Maybe I’m just in odd spaces, but that statement just seemed factual to me.

While I don’t think being frivolous specifically is limited to your 20s, I’m a very different person now than I was when I was in my 20s. That’s a good thing IMO! A lot of my interests are the same but my priorities have greatly shifted in the last 10 years because I’m at a different stage in my life. When I was 21, I remember feeling so stressed and anxious about going on a camping trip with friends and whether or not I could skip it because I was broke and still be a core part of the friend group. At 34, it’s a very different calculus because fitting in with a friend group just isn’t my number one priority now. I know myself better because I’ve had time to explore who I am as a fully realized person. In my 20s, I was still figuring that out. That period of time where you’re coming into your own, truly discovering what you want out of life and how you’re going to get it IS a unique time in my experience! I get the fantasy of wanting an older, wiser person (who also happens to be hot and great in bed) there to help you navigate it. Even though I rarely read fics where the age gap is the point (it’s just not my thing - and that’s OK!) I definitely understand the appeal.

I do agree that, if you’re going to write an older reader you should just write an older reader. Maybe I’ve just gotten lucky and not encountered content like that but, even if I did, I’d just roll my (ancient, 34-year-old) eyes, assume it was written by a 19-year-old who would know better in a few years, and move along. That teenaged creator isn’t going to change the way society views women, all that will be accomplished is making some random person online feel bad or dig in their heels even more. I think we can have these conversations (and should have these conversations) without throwing creators under the bus.

Sorry this was so long! Again, I hope it helps shed some light on my thoughts 😊

Thanks for reaching out!!

[project1939]

Day 14- Film: Rancho Notorious 

Release date: March 1st 

Studio: RKO 

Genre: Western 

Director: Fritz Lang 

Producer: Howard Welsch 

Actors: Marlene Dietrich, Arthur Kennedy, Mel Ferrer 

Plot Summary: When Vern’s fiancé is viciously raped and murdered, his sole focus becomes finding the man who did it. Twists and turns lead him to a mysterious woman named Altar Keane, who used to be a barroom girl and now runs a hideaway ranch for outlaws. Vern suspects someone on the ranch killed his fiancé. While there, he befriends Frenchy, another outlaw who has a long and tangled history with Altar. 

My Rating (out of five stars): *** �� 

This film had been on my radar for some time- I love Marlene Dietrich and Mel Ferrer, and director Fritz Lang has made some incredible films. I’d never watched this, though, because I heard it wasn’t the greatest. So I went into it excited to see the two actors but trepidatious about the rest. It wasn’t as bad as I was fearing, and I actually enjoyed quite a bit of it.

The good: 

Marlene Dietrich. She’s a Legend. I love her. I worship her for openly being her fabulous bisexual self all throughout her life and for wearing a tux better than anyone in Hollywood. That said, she is a little old here (51) to be playing a sex-pot kind of character. Maybe I’m being ageist, I don’t know. She still looked swoony in men’s clothing, and in real life she was having a steamy affair with Yul Brenner, who was almost 20 years younger, so... 

Mel Ferrer. He’s sort of the Ralph Fiennes of his day- boyishly handsome but brimming with vulnerability and sensitivity under the surface. In this film, Ferrer suffers from the opposite issue of Dietrich- his role is probably a little too old for him. They grey his hair a bit as time goes on, but he still only looks about 30. 

Arthur Kennedy is splendid again. 

I liked the “outlaw hideout ranch” part of the film. 

The Technicolor, while not as glorious as MGM’s, looked very good. 

The Bad:

It was just missing something. A lot of the elements for a great film were there, but something just never totally clicked for me. I cared about the characters, but not quite enough. I was interested in the plot, but not quite enough.  

Why oh why did they give Marlene that '50s housewife kind of hairstyle? 

The weird singing narrator! This other-worldly voice keeps coming on to sing us information that we can figure out ourselves. Vern is driven by “hate, murder, and revenge,” for example. The singer also appears to like singing the phrase “Chuck-a-luck!” It’s kind of campy, and so part of me liked it, but only part. 

[whatbigotspost]

I’ll just talk to myself about it, I’m good and experienced at this, teehee.

Just thinking more about how I have such a love/hate relationship with Barbie the doll, the symbol, the movie. Do I feel like I’m dying in a late stage capitalist hellscape of bubble gum pink cross promotional marketing. Like literally suffocating? Sure.

Do I hate the havoc Barbie wreaked on the body image of me, my friends, my generation, and my mom’s before me? Also true.

Have I written entire papers and educational curriculum for girls and endless blog posts related to deconstructing the white supremacist, able bodied, ageist, classist, fatphobic, transphobic beauty ideal of which Barbie is commonly, specifically called out for having played a central cultural role?

Of course. But love and hate are the same sides of 1 coin: a passionate emotion. It’s the whole “the opposite of love’s indifference” thing and I definitely don’t feel indifferently about Barbie.

I’m just the right age to have been raised in a weird quagmire of Barbie popularity meets 90s shallow girl power shit meets the height of the thin ideal during the “heroin chic” era. I had the Barbie that famously told me “math class is tough.” I was one of the little girls devastated to be waaaay bigger than the original “my size” Barbie so I was told I couldn’t get one at all (“you were meant to wear her clothes, why should we waste money on her when you can’t.”) I was 12 when Aqua’s notoriously sexual-flirts-with-kids-doll-content, yet indelibly iconic “Barbie Girl” was playing everywhere. I wasn’t naive, I understood the song’s content but didn’t have the perspective or maturity yet to understand the context. I just knew that right around when that song came out was the first time I was cat called by an adult man as a child because I had grown tits seemingly overnight and I didn’t feel safe or content in my body again for another 20 years thereafter.

AND

I also have an 8 year old Barbie fanatic alive and well inside me. A little girl who loves that plastic fashionista bitch and all her friends. I had about a million Barbies when I was approximately ages 5-11.

The hours I lost playing Barbies with my two neighborhood besties are incalculable.

Or maybe the hours weren’t lost, more like……put toward practicing navigating relationships through plastic model avatars? Figuring out my sense of humor? Learning to tell stories? Just being silly weird little girls having wonderful little girl fun? Whatever the case, it all went down in a boring suburb and the only thing in walking distance worth doing in my tiny worldview back then was hanging out with other Barbie girls. The ones who “knew how to play Barbies right” aka, creating whole worlds and eras and distinct characters and interwoven narratives we could build on for weeks. We had dynasties and lore…the drama, the intrigue, the complex family dynamics and stories we acted out through those dolls.

It’s just why I totally get what Barbieland was, immediately. It’s why some of you know what I mean when I say “play Barbies right” immediately.

It wasn’t changing clothes or brushing her hair although that happened TOO. It was much more us trying to work out what we saw around us in real adults but even more so media adults, emulating the best we could what we thought our lives would be like if we would someday be as glamorous as our Barbies. (Or Rachel on Friends. Or Cher and Ty in Clueless.)

It was us reflecting back what we were hearing, but also it was us being us when some of our roughest and most beautiful edges hadn’t been dulled yet.

Anyway Greta Gerwig made this movie for me. Well, all the me-s. All us ladies with the love/hate Barbie baggage that seems ubiquitous when I’m talking to other Xennials. And Greta says this is so by centering the film between Barbie and America Ferrera’s character (“the mom”) instead of the tween, like it seemed for a moment. Women my age and general background couldn’t be more the center of the target audience for this film if we tried and the layers that are within it are still making my head spin and want to talk about it so fucking much. There’s so much here. Of course many men don’t get it. (The good ones do.)

And it’s also a film you can totally experience at a shallow level if you want to. It’s both, and. Good and bad. Shallow and complex. Fun and dangerous.

Like isn’t corporate propaganda woven in art that moved me this greatly probably the absolute WORST kind? Isn’t it being wildly effective? Did I even have a choice to feel this way about Barbie? Wasn’t Mattel target marketing to me since before I exited the womb? Wasn’t this a creative way to hook me back in when they’re at their most irrelevant in my life? When I had processed and packed Barbie away as “problematic” like any good lil budding feminist of the aughts would have? When I feel guilty buying my nieces the Barbies they want? When I’m like “psh, curvy Barbie is still thin.”

Haven’t they just found a new way to get me? They center my current life values, drive directly into what my Barbie gripes have been, and leverage someone my age’s penchant for nostalgia…BOOM thereby succeeding in making ever more money off of me? (Again using me here as “this general target demographic.” They see the “me” factor here at scale.)

It makes me sick to think how Mattel playing cutsie “in on the joke” mega corp via Will Ferrell, etc. is just another way that there’s a weird dance of cognitive dissonance throughout this whole experience. To which Greta would say, “I KNOW RIGHT?”

Someone talk about the Barbie movie with me moooore. What did you think? I’ve been ruminating on it constantly since I saw it last weekend and I’m seeing it again this weekend so I can absorb and analyze more. My partner is probably growing tired of it occupying so much of my brain 😅

[swiftful-thinking13]

there’s a 99% chance that your bad future therapist is in my cohort :DD

[yes-another-obey-me-blog]

Hiya! If your requests are open, I would love to put one in for a poly relationship between lucifer, diavolo and mc (as mates) <3

oOOooOooo I love poly stuff~~~ I’m assuming ABO because of you want mates.

Poly Lucifer x GN! Mc x Diavolo 

Mc’s secondary sex is not mentioned.

It was warm, to warm it felt like you were being smothered by heat. Opening your eyes you were squished into your mate's chest, one of his arms around your shoulders and legs intertwined with his.  Shifting you felt another arm around your waist pressing your waist to his.  This would be nice if you weren't burning up, the combined body heat was making you sweat. You pushed at Diavolo's chest, "My prince, let me up." You wiggled in his grip and started to move your legs. He hummed and opened his eyes a bit.

"And why would I do that my unity?"  There it is, that nickname he uses to get his way, unity.  Not because you held him and lucifer together, but because you were unifying the realms.  The unity that brought the three realms together.  He closed his eyes and pulled you closer to him, "We have today off, let's sleep in unity..."  You wiggled more.

"As much as I would love to sleep in I can't with you two boiling me alive~~"  Opening his eyes again he takes a closer look at you and notices the sweat and the discomfort on your face.  He blinks once, twice, and with little effort flips you both to where you're on the outside and he's in the middle, yanking you out of Lucifer's hold.  The alpha wakes with a growl and you can't see it but you're sure he's scowling.  Lucifer raises up and glares at the apex that's shaking with laughter.

"Sorry dearest, didn't mean to wake you."   "Of course you didn't,"  Lucifer growls not believing a word your mate said.  Hoping to calm him you reach out to him and brush your fingers across his face.  He takes your hand in his and kisses the inside of your wrist, "Morning my love."  Just the sound of his morning voice sends shivers through you.  Climbing over Diavolo Lucifer kisses you, "Now it's a good morning love."

"Don't forget me, Dearest, ~" Diavolo leans in to kiss Lucifer but is met with Lucifer pushing his face away.  Dia's face squished ageist Lucifer's hand as he looks up at him with a pout.  "Deawist why'd yoouu stwp me?"  He speaks with his face squished. 

"Because you woke me up by ripping our love from me, so no kisses for you. All. Day." He smirks and pushes Dia's face away from him and swings his leg over the bed and gets up.

"Dearest all day?!"  Diavolo lets you go and get up, "That's not fair!!" He whines.  For a prince, he acts like a child sometimes, you hold back a laugh as you get up and grab Dia's shirt from last night.  The shirt shifts to fit your form, even though they said it was a simple enchantment it never ceases to amaze you.  The fabric can loosen and tighten at its own will, so no matter your shape it fits you comfortably.  You can hear Diavolo whining and Lucifer scolding him, shaking your head walking over to Lucifer’s dresser you steal a pair of blue boxers with the same enchantment.  

"Well if you two are going to keep "fighting" I'm going to get breakfast." You open the door only for Lucifer to gently close it.  You raise your brow at him.   "Don't worry about it Unity, I'll have Barbatos bring us something later."  He smiles when he sees you wearing his shirt, "As much as I like you wearing my clothes you shouldn't have gotten dressed." Diavolo rises off the bed.  "A useless effort but not unwelcome."  Lucifer hums in agreement and runs his hands down your chest, waist and settles on your hips.  Hands playing with the waistband of his stolen boxers.  Feeling cheeky you push ageist him, he growls into your neck as a warning.  

"I don't know~" you tease, "I'm pretty hungry, maybe you should convince me to stay?"  Making direct eye contact with Diavolo and grinding on Lucifer you smirk. "If you can Alpha~"  Lucifer’s teeth dig into your neck forcing a groan from you as Diavolo pulls out his D.D.D and puts it to his ear.  You can hear it ringing, you narrow your eyes in confusion only to grin when Dia's golden eyes meet yours and he says: Clear my weekend Barbatos, I've had something important pop-up.

[chainofclovers]

Ted Lasso 2x6 thoughts

I felt like the physical embodiment of a series of iconic reaction GIFs while watching this episode. I felt like Higgins gagging on air and right and wrong choices. As an invested, non-casual Ted Lasso viewer, I feel quite absorbed in the experience of every episode, but I’m not usually a LOUD non-casual Ted Lasso viewer. At one point last night, I shouted “This is the wackiest show ever made!” at @bristler, and that doesn’t even sound like something I would say. And by “wacky” I just meant “all the emotions are happening at once.”

This episode was absolutely great and I knew that every single Rebecca Welton feeling I have would intensify because of this episode and that is exactly what happened.

This is me bravely writing down my episode thoughts after only one viewing (just like last week) and a bad night of sleep! Copious spoilers and emotions ahead...

This show goes all in on hats! A lot of bad hats for giving bad relationship advice and making bad decisions! Feel like you’re gonna do something correctly? Just put on a bad hat, that’ll snap you right out of it. Just had a revelation that you are almost certainly in an abusive relationship? Your girlfriend is hiding in the parking lot with a terrible hat for you! (I love this show.)

Dark forest dark forest dark forest dark forest.

I truly, truly, truly do not mean this to sound judgmental of any other fan, but it’s taking everything in my power not to just type “dark forest” in the comments of every person who is outraged that LDN152 is not Ted.

Gonna get my initial thoughts on the Sam=LDN152 reveal out of the way. I honestly like this choice.

First, I like this choice because of who LDN152 isn’t. I think about how awful it would be if she’d matched with Rupert and realized she’d been manipulated by him and charmed by him all over again, and how, when she gets the same reveal the audience already has, she would end up retraumatized by having been charmed and taken in by Rupert all over again. I think about her matching with Nate (if he’d redownloaded the app) and the inadequacy of her assertiveness advice and how Nate is one of the only non-Rupert characters who’s used sexist language against her and how Nate’s insecurities would be like water trying to co-exist with the oil of Rebecca’s insecurities. Nate and Rebecca are fond of each other and seem to want to be in each other’s lives, but a romantic squishing together via dating app would set them both back lightyears. I think about her matching with Ted, a man currently on a parallel-to-Rebecca trek through a very painfully dark forest, a man swinging wildly between performative attempted wit and utter panic. A man she trusts with her professional and personal challenges. [Her challenging mother comes to town and Keeley and Ted are the people she wants with her at lunch.] Ted and Rebecca, with all their current limitations, and with all the ways the forest obscures the view, are trying to be there for each other in their real, non-romantic comedy versions of their lives, and the discomfort of matching on an app seems like the kind of thing that would make them rear back from each other instead of bringing them even closer together. It is not time. It is so profoundly not time that I would have been furious if the writers had continued the “maybe it’s Ted?” line of thought for another second longer than they did.

Second, I like this choice because of who Sam is. I know. He’s not an appropriate match for her. The power dynamics are all messed up and their ages are all wrong. But this does introduce a potentially interesting parallel between Rupert and his younger women and the scrutiny Rebecca would risk herself and Sam experiencing if she goes for it. Rebecca seems to have tried to put away her Rupert-related trauma, but the specter of Rupert is lurking, and I do see that being a good person making an ethically complicated decision with another good person is very different from being an abuser setting out to take advantage of multiple people...but there are parallels she might have to reckon with. Also, Sam is a kind person with a strong ethical center and a well-documented interest in Rebecca. He and Ted helped each other feel more at home in London during a time of deeply missing other homes, and Sam has internalized a lot of Ted’s ways of living in a way that might genuinely appeal to Rebecca even if she doesn’t fully realize why. The writers on this show don’t write messes for the sake of drama. They write messes because life is painful and complicated and also very funny. I’d be shocked if, however this Bantr thing plays out, it isn’t painful and complicated and also funny.

(I am already a little worried that whatever happens next is going to activate some very ironic fan reactions given this is a show whose thesis statement is about withholding judgment. This fear is based not on Ted Lasso-specific knowledge but on unfortunate patterns of fandom, but...you can fear the impact of racist, sexist, and ageist tropes on two beloved characters without embodying those tropes as a viewer. You can watch characters make decisions that could subject them to harmful scrutiny without performing that harm yourself.)

Ted Lasso is a fictional character who tweeted about the joy of eating out (you know...at the Crown and Anchor) the day before 2x6 launched and during 2x6 Rebecca invited him to eat out at the Crown and Anchor. (I love this show.) I am so, so, so fond of all the little lunch-y things in this episode. Ted can’t bring Henry his lunch because he’s “at work” aka living in London. Ted and Beard surprise each other with secret sandwiches on Fridays. Rebecca is overwhelmed by her mother’s visit (her mother’s performance of a harmful pattern) and wants Keeley and Ted there. The scene at the Crown and Anchor, as painful as all the divorce/separation feelings were, was also so homey and lovely in terms of these characters being friends, being at home in a place despite the very not-at-home feelings emanating from Deborah. The Bake-Off viewing! Ted being the designated driver (probably a good thing on this particular day)! Rebecca feeling discomfort but not shutting down! Also cute British pub feelings. Evidence that Rebecca has talked to her mom about Ted! About personal things about Ted!

Naaaaaaate. His bursts of confidence and insight. The pain and insecurity and anger almost literally bubbling under the surface.

I cannot say enough good things about Higgins. He’s grown so much, and his decision to be honest with Beard regarding his concerns about Jane was absolutely impeccably done. Many, many trusted people in Higgins’ life told him not to do it. They are all good people, and they were all wrong. Sometimes one human being’s honesty makes the difference for someone who is struggling, and that’s exactly what happened here. Beard truly heard Higgins. And of course he didn’t immediately break things off with Jane. But he heard Higgins, and when Jane showed up Beard’s face looked different than it ever has, and Higgins words are with him as he walks off into the night with Jane and that might save him. And Rebecca witnessed it.

And I’m so glad she witnessed Higgins’ choice in the midst of this very difficult experience of a) trying to find Ted because she knows he’s in pain and being unable to and b) watching her mother repeat a pattern that Rebecca herself was able to break. It taught me so much about Rebecca. The way she was punished (and described the experience using the language of punishment) for having an honest reaction to her mother’s decision to leave her father the first time. The way she was taught that love is conditional, that love and reconciliation are things you can purchase with gifts. The way her mother uses the language of self-help without internalizing what it would take to heal, and probably has little use for actual therapy. The way her mother drinks alcohol as a way to feel free.

I don’t even know how to think, much less write, about everything with Roy’s coaching and his image and how Ted feels about it and all the fatherhood things Jamie brings up and all the fatherhood things Ted is missing w/r/t Nate and everyone except for Rebecca taking at face value (or willfully deciding to take at face value) the idea that Ted’s panic attack is actually just him needing to go barf up a fish pie. Ted hugging his backpack in Sharon’s office. Rebecca trying to find him, and Sharon being the one who does. The words “I wanna make an appointment” being the words that conclude the episode at the exact midpoint of the planned-for show. Halfway through the middle season. The moment Ted realizes he’s never going to be okay if he doesn’t give therapy a try.

I also can’t say enough good things about the moment with the team and Sharon, the way she agrees to one drink, the way it’s clear that she adores them all. Sharon is exacting and professional without being cold and calculating, and everything she does in this episode is such a gorgeous model of assertiveness, patience, and moderation...three things Ted struggles with the most.

What a dark forest. What an excellent group of humans.

[wellthatwasaletdown]

Harry needs to understand that his fans are not stupid like him or the fossil he’s so vaguely trying to protect!

And maybe start to respect his fans as human beings and not his minions who would run behind him eating all the shits his says. He’s a shit it doesn’t mean his fans are like him… and that thing he has around all the time.

Btw at this point he’s proven to not be different from her to the point that maybe they deserve each other after all! This is so ridiculous to even watch, reading this made me feel like he’s that kind of person looking at you like he’s a in a position of power and I’m the child that’s been called out. We’ll wake up styles the twitter corner you’re so adamantly attacking us made of the only people who are not scared of telling you how disgusting you, your family, your friends and your girlfriend are! And that’s nothing more than a brunch of fake rich people who knows nothing about life! He’s the one who needs to grow up because at this point he’s just pathetic. At least don’t deny the obvious, calling that wedding a private event was truly the lowest thing he could do. How does he dare to act like we’re stupid? Don’t know you but I feel truly offended this time, they could’ve avoided a lot of things in this interview but just chose to confirm their status of pathetic fame hungry disgusting people. Sorry for the rant but this is really too much for me!

Ps I probably sent you another anon with a cropped message sorry

You did--and, again, you can make your points without being ageist.

[fedonciadale]

Oh for fuck’s sake! Again with those ageist, misogynistic anons? They make me so angry. What do they think will happen when they grow “old”? Stop reading, stop watching what they love? Stop writing if they are writers? How old do they think writers and directors are, anyway? Aren’t they gross and immature for actually writing their ships?

Look, I’m in my early 20s, I’m young. Even so, I noticed that the way I read, see, and interpret characters, dynamics and stories changes as I grow older and gain life experience. I still like my childhood fandoms, and why not? I love going back there, I adore that childhood feeling (I don’t know how to explain it, but I think you get what I’m saying), and I love realizing how differently I see them now that I’m older. For example, Harry Potter: the way I read it now is vastly different from when I first read it at 11. My approach changed, my understanding of the characters and their motivations deepened, I analyze the story and its meaning with another point of view than that of a child. I actually can’t wait to read Harry Potter again as an older, more mature woman, and as a mother! I bet my perspectives will deepen further, or maybe even change. The more experienced I get, the more insight I’ll gain in regards to the author’s choices. That’s what maturity means in this context!

By their logic, only teenagers should be allowed to write and enjoy fiction about teenagers, people in their 20s should write only for their peers, and so on and so forth. I want them to tell me how that could possibly make any sense.

Or perhaps they expect “old” people to watch and read passively, enjoying only to a certain extent, without caring too much and without shipping characters? Enthusiasm doesn’t vanish with age. Liking characters and dynamics is not inherent to adolescence. What on earth are we talking about?

Sorry for my rant, I just think it’s beyond frustrating that so many people think that, as we grow old, we shouldn’t engage in our passions anymore. I can’t imagine how incredibly annoying it must be for you, as the target of their criticism!

Personally, I love reading your metas, thoughts and fanfics. Your age makes you wise (not saying that every grown-up person is wise, though. Unfortunately, in some cases age adds nothing to one’s intelligence and maturity, but that’s off topic), and you’re certainly not immature for being an active part of a fandom and gushing over a ship.

Hi there!

Thanks for the heads up! Glad you like my stuff! 🤗

Ageism must be the most stupid of isms... I mean age comes for us all.

I suspect that anon actually believes that you stop having fun at a certain age. Wonder what they will do when they have reached my age... Hopefully by that time they look back at their younger self and feel some embarrassment.

And isn't it interesting that men are allowed to gush over football, their games, their handicrafts etc. But women are supposed to be 'mature'. 🤔

And yes, our perspective changes when we get older and when we read something more often. And this is a nice experience! Because hopefully we remember why we liked certain books and characters and still empathise with them.

HP is a good example. I read the books so differently now than the first time. I really thought Dumbledore was a kind old mentor on my first read. And now I think he was a manipulating cold bastard. I still think the character is compelling though. So, in a way I still 'like' him if differently. I still like Harry but I see his flaws more clearly and nowadays I think that the only really nice persons in HP are Luna and Neville. Lol.

I read the ASOIAF books now very differently from how I read them on my first read. My opinion on some of the POVs has changed very much. A reassessment of Tyrion, Sansa, Cersei for example. Some characters are my favs consistently though. I loved Jaime from the beginning and I still love my disaster Lannister. I still love Cat! - which does not mean that I do not see their flaws.

There is a certain magic though to reading a book the first time: sometimes I wish I could go back to my twelve year old self and experience the magic of reading LotR for the first time again, but I digress...

I actually think it is harmful to tell people that they can only read or write something written for them - be it their age group, their gender, their ethnicity - whatever...

Because reading and writing is actually the easiest way to empathise. And we should try to slip into other people's skin. Men should absolutely read Jane Austen and should experience some of the frustration of the expectations of society on women. White people should read about poc and their experiences. Abled people should read about the many difficulties of disabled. If I only read and write about my own bubble that is extremely restricting. We should absolutely stretch our imagination and challenge ourselves.

I just finish by sharing a funny story with you about how age changes perspective. When I was a child I watched a movie with my family and my sister and I absolutely fell in love with the main character. And somehow we didn't come across this film again.... And forgot the title etc. Years later my sister had managed to secure a DVD. We watched the movie, with high anticipation. And well. Let's just say the movie had a very old fashioned idea of women.... Afterwards we looked at each other and I said : OMG? This is such misogynistic crap! A childhood dream destroyed. We laughed so hard. 😂

Thanks for the ask!

[beautifulterriblequeen]

B2:S - Chapter 4

Much of this series will be about the differences and additions in the novel version, and how they contribute to my understanding of story canon. But there will be character appreciation, the odd theory and headcanon, and suchlike as well.

Here be Viren being villainous, Rayla, Claudia, Soren, and Callum, and tons of culture clash themey stuff

and a tw: animal death, Claudia why

Spoilers for Book Two: Sky below.

Viren's scenes in Book Two: Sky are all amazing because they're full of worldbuilding and character building details. I love to study the word choices used from his perspective. They're so tasty. Like how he forced a servant, and also Soren, to carry his messages to the rookery, so that he never had to go himself. I'm really curious why Viren is forcing a servant, whose job is literally to serve, here. He really only has to ask. Maybe he was mean about it on purpose, or maybe he picked a servant who was afraid of birds just to flex on them. Whatever the reason for the word choice, Viren doesn't seem to like servants' jobs, it seems, especially when they take him somewhere with poop on the floor. It makes it all the more ironic that he sweeps Runaan's cell clean himself, then, humbling himself before he finally figures out the mirror.

Viren's secretive, right down to his very carefully chosen words to those around him, but his true thoughts shine through even more clearly in the book than in the show. He knows he's been sneaking and hiding stuff, and he knows that some of those actions would be called treachery. Stealing the king's seal to forge royal documents is up there on the treacherous list, but it's apparently not there alone. Ah, Viren, such a villainous delight. What have you gotten up to?

The way he thinks of and treats Crow Master is ageist and classist, but certain lines also hint that Viren has spent a lot of time memorizing the finer points of proper courtesy, and he expects others to have done the same. There are many reasons someone might put forth such effort: a commoner trying to better himself to be noticed by a kind prince is a nice version. A sociopath learning to fake caring about rich people so he can blend in with them is less nice. Superconveniently, the skills a young, earnest Viren might use to feel worthy of Harrow's attention will serve him just as well when dark magic ravages his empathy and he has to lie to everyone about how dead he is inside in order to keep his position of power. Until he's not lying anymore and he straight up threatens poor Crow Master with death unless he sends illegal mail for him. There's the Viren we know and uhhhhhh

Rayla and the blue rose! It's so fun to see inside her head here. She acted swiftly in the last chapter to save herself from Claudia's sleep spell, but now that she has to lie there, that thorn really hurts! She wishes she maybe had a different plan instead of playing asleep.

I hope Rayla only calls Claudia's voice "awful" because of association. I love Claudia's raspy voice! It's so neat! Rayla immediately recognizes it as Claudia's, from the castle and identifies her as a dark mage, with a clanky-metal warrior beside her. She gets mad at Soren for apparently calling killing a sport, even though that's not what he said at all. Soren's using an unfamiliar, maybe old-fashioned term, and Rayla's taking it very literally. It's like Viren and Runaan are arguing through them. A fun little example of culture clash.

Also digging the fact that Rayla knows what sleeping breathing looks like, as opposed to awake breathing, for the purposes of faking someone out. Did she just. Perch in a tree over Runaan and Ethari as they napped after a picnic and watched them sleep, or did Runaan help her sneak around the Silvergrove to spy on sleeping elves for training purposes? Also, raise your hand if you've faked sleep breathing to fool someone. that's not just me right

Rayla's sass is a constant delight. Whenever she's up against an enemy, she is outwardly fearless and full of witty taunts and comments, and I love her so much. where could she have learned this from I also love that she can't help but flex on Soren about her technique. It seems that her attitude is part "never show fear" and part "humans are liars."

Claudia and Soren were trying to kill Rayla to save the princes from her. But Rayla was also intent on killing both of them right back. And she wasn't ever gonna tell Callum and Ez about that. Woah. First Harrow, now this. That whole "death and secrets" thing really sank in with her, didn't it? Crack voice in the back of my brain: Ethari does know Runaan stabs people, right, he does know that?

Interesting change of detail from show to book: in the show, Claudia overheats Rayla's swords with some green splattery goo from a little glass jar. In the book, uhhh. She grabs a live bird and squishes it to cast the spell. Eew. Really making a point of dark magic's inherent violence today, I see. Got it.

"Rayla, pipe down." Callum still has a ways to go on how to win friends and influence people here. Everyone's shouting, he's interrupted to save Rayla's life (or so he thinks), and when Rayla shouts that his friends tried to kill her, he tells her--and no one else--to pipe down. Followed soon by "but a 'good' elf." Ahgod. He doesn't think he's taking sides, but he's got two humans versus one elf, and he's a human himself, and his underlying biases are showing. He's 14, and he's willing to learn, though--and he really does learn and grow over time. But this version of this scene was just. So. Painfully. Awkward.

I feel like this version was part of a larger theme I'm seeing throughout the first half of the book, emphasizing that Callum comes from years of having a crush on Claudia, and it takes many scenes with Claudia and with Rayla to shift through several gears with each of them in order to facilitate the possibility of breaking with Claudia and then also of falling for Rayla, in a way that feels organic within the structure of the story being told.

Also Callum super has a type and it's Girls Who Will Commit Murder. I don't make the rules.

Rayla's defense just attacks Callum's word choice: "What do you mean, 'but a good elf'? Do you know any bad elves?" And I just. Rayla, honey. You're not in any better of a spot than Callum right now. Your mentor literally stabs people to death. You're both literally assassins. Some humans could accept most elves, but they might draw the line at assassins.

But this tiny clash in the midst of this war, this single exchange of words, is such a great microcosm, the war made personal. It's early enough in their adventure and their growth that they're still sounding a lot like their parents. And that includes Claudia! She demands to know how an elf can be good, and Callum allows that it's possible for good elves to exist, but he has to be the one to say it, not the actual elf behind him. And the actual elf behind him insists that her kind are all good, thank you very much, and implying otherwise skirts very close to "humans are liars."

It's quite a tangle, but having the main characters tangled up like this shows us that as they untangle themselves in their own personal situations, they're learning things about human and elven hearts, about relationships and family, and those things are universal truths which they can use to help them understand other people's troubles, as well as the larger issues involved in the war they're trying to stop.

Callum assessing--and then reassessing--his confidence level. It's adorable, and it serves to show that his first scrambling attempt to make peace, in which he messed up a little but at least no one died--won't be his last. He's not really sure how this is gonna go. Everything is new. But he's dedicated to peace, and he's not giving up. He did just run in between Soren and his target while Soren was holding a sword.

He keeps doing that. Standing in front of people who have their weapons raised in his direction. And he does it with a ridiculous amount of chill. Is this Sarai's influence on him? Considering that Harrow has kept his distance, maybe so! I'd love that.

This chapter ends with some fun relationship drama when Callum gets butterflies in his stomach at being around Claudia again. She tucks a strand of hair behind his ear, and he forgets all about telling her about smashing her primal stone. He instantly worries that Rayla saw her gesture, which of course she did. Callum's nervousness and Rayla's glare feel to me like they're supposed to fit into a tactical box instead of a romantic box, but I can see how it could be interpreted the other way. Callum just intervened in a fight that Rayla completely intended to end by secretly killing Claudia and Soren, so in Rayla's mind, she's probably convinced that Callum intervened to save his girlfriend's life, while he's sure that he just saved Rayla's. She's probably angry because Claudia's gesture is making her think that Callum only seemed to be trying to save Rayla when his true intention was to save Claudia all along.

Dun dun dunnnnnnn.

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Bits & Pieces, Themes & Evidence

Morning Everyone! So, below are just a bunch of bits and pieces that me, my fellow theorists and/or others in the fandom have come up. They don’t really fit into one, cohesive theory, but they’re most about or have come out of 10x18. I keep joking that this is the episode that just keeps on giving. We’re STILL talking about it and figuring things out about it.

Leah as a Hallucination/Daryl’s PTSD:

It’s been suggested that in 10x18, Dog never actually left Daryl. The episode is cut in a way to suggest that Daryl went long periods without seeing Dog (which is symbolic, of course) but maybe that’s not true and Dog was always there. Not only is that super interesting, but it works with one of my first observations. When I first watched the episode, I thought that the second time he sees Dog, first time as a grown dog and not a pup, and meets Leah, he didn't seem surprised to see Dog. So, I thought maybe he'd seen Dog a lot by then. I changed my mind for the sake of the symbolism. If it represents Grady, it makes more sense that Daryl simply recognized him as the pup me once met, but really had been separated from his for awhile. But I’m just saying this hallucination theory and the idea of Dog being there all along, just backs up my first impressions. That's all.

Also, weapon13whitefang left a long comment on my Tumblr post about Leah being a hallucination. It's really not so much about the show as about PTSD because they have some experience with it. I found it really interesting and enlightening, so it might interest some of you. You can read it HERE under the comments.

Why He Got Defensive at the Idea of Leah Leaving Him

A couple of my friends were talking about this, and this is just my contribution to the conversation. I think it's directly because Leah is predicated on his time with Beth. Even if he's not consciously aware of the delusion, some part of his UNconscious brain knows that Leah = Beth. And he knows Beth wouldn't have willingly left him. Not only because she said that, but because when she DID disappear, it wasn't her fault or her choice either time. So, when Carol says, "maybe she just left," Daryl's brain rails against that and he gets really defensive. And the interesting thing is that it's really not about him taking it personally or about his ego. It's about what he knows to be true of Beth. It's actually his brain being really logical in the midst of the delusion.

The Talk Dead to Me Podcast with Lynn Collins

I listened to the Talk Dead to me Podcast and this week’s guest was—no surprise—Lynn Collins. No huge TD smoking guns or anything, but it was interesting nonetheless. First of all, one of the really big C@ryl accounts was pretty much called out for being a toxic troll.

For anyone who doesn’t know, Lynn Collins gave a different interview a few days back (not this podcast; just a different one) in which she mentioned that Daryl and Carol’s relationship is very mother/son. Just after that, I won’t say the name but one of the most well known C@ryl accounts who can be REALLY nasty to…well…I was gonna say other shippers but pretty much anyone in the fandom who dares disagree with her, called Lynn an ageist for saying that Carol was mothering Daryl.

So, when the podcast began, Johnny O’Dell, who is the host, said that most TWD fans are super cool but a lot of the shippers can be toxic. He doesn't mention any particular ships in accordance to that (I actually think he briefly mentions all of them, saying people ship Daryl with Carol, Beth, Connie, and Rosita the most) but then after saying SOME of the shippers can be toxic, he talked about the post she made calling Lynn Collins ageist and said that was ridiculous and toxic and that we need to be cool to the actors. So, it's very obvious it was her comment he was talking about.

And of course, the ageist thing she accused Lynn Collins of is ridiculous. Not only is it true that Carol and Daryl’s relationship can be very mother/son at times, but saying so is not an insult to Carol. It’s a comment on the nature of the relationship, not on anyone’s actual age. Of course Carol isn’t old enough to be Daryl’s mom. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t mother him.

Then when Lynn Collins came onto the podcast, she addressed the ageist comment. She basically said everything I said above in more detail. She talked about how she was taken aback by being called that because, being a woman over 40 in Hollywood, she actually deals with a lot of ageism. And about how she's a mother, but became one a little later in life (in her thirties, rather than her twenties) and she was shocked that being called a mother can actually be derogatory to some people. It REALLY shouldn’t be. It’s really sad that people would take that as an insult. And then she went on to say that any character can be maternal, even if they're not the biological mother of the person they're mothering. She even said Daryl is somewhat paternal to Carol, teaching her how to gut a fish and everything.

Now, maybe this is neither here nor there when it comes to TD stuff. But one thing I thought was really interesting was that Lynn Collins said when she first started watching the show in S2 or S3, she was actually a Caryler. She wanted them together originally. She also said that eventually she realized that's not where they were going with it and kind of moved on. 

But the thing is, it just proves to me even more that she's being told to talk about it in a particular way. If everything she's said is true: that she was a raging fan and has been in the tags and talking about it a ton (and she says that on the podcast again; that she would get really excited about it and watch with friends and they would tell her to chill, lol) then why on earth would you talk about Daryl and Carol as a mother/son relationship...unless you were instructed to. 

She knows how passionate and sometimes toxic the Caryl ship is because she used to be one of them. So that just drove home for me that this isn't something she would just come up with on her own. And I did like what she said and how she said it. I honestly think she's trying to help the Carylers feel better about things, but also let them down gently. And of course there are some hardcore Carylers, like that account that said the ageist thing, that are just never going to give it up. Not much anyone can do about that.

The only other thing that struck me about the podcast, and also brought to mind stuff said on TTD, is that I'm more and more sure that everyone knows what's up with Leah's character. If she's an illusion (and I'll assume she is until we know different) I think everyone knows that. I think Lynn knows it, Norman, Melissa, all of them. 

For one thing, she said in this podcast that she didn't know if or when she'd be back. That was kind of a slip of the tongue, I think, because we already know she's signed on for S11, and she's announced it. And they're filming. So that's just untrue. And I thought that about Melissa on TTD, too. She said she didn't know what the Leah story line would be, they only told her a little bit back in Bonds when she had to say "her dog." But Melissa is a long time, mainstream cast member. I just don't believe that she doesn't know where the story is going. Again, just something they're instructed to say. But something else occurred to me, too.

When Melissa talked about the "her dog" line on TTD, she said, "there was a line that became a thing." From that, I have to assume she meant that people started to obsess about it online and wonder what the "her" was about. I honestly don't know if anyone other than TD picked out that line, but they might have. Either way, between this, and their reaction to the Caryler's "ageist" comment, it proves that they read the online theories. And of course we all already know that, but there's proof. That ageist comment was posted like 24 hours ago. And already they're addressing it and obviously don't like it and don't want people thinking the show or its actors are associated with that sort of thing.

Which is exactly why I think they HAVE to know about our Leah-is-a-hallucination theory. Even others outside our fandom suspect it. But the writers aren't addressing that. And don't get me wrong: I don't think they will. The Bonds line was literally MONTHS ago, and they waited until the Leah episode to address it. Because otherwise, they'd have to give spoilers and they weren't going to do that. But my point is, if the hallucination theory was not a thing (kind of like Rick being on TWB was not a thing and Lynn Collins being an ageist is not a thing and Beth not being BBQed at Terminus was not a thing) they would be addressing and discrediting it. They aren't. I’m definitely side-eyeing that.

Daryl’s Search for Rick/Beth’s Search for Liquor

This is something my fellow theorists and I were discussing back and forth for a few days. I’m not going to give you the entire conversation, but someone said something about Beth searching for liquor in Still and couldn’t that be a foreshadow? See—you’ll probably hear more about this in coming weeks—but we’ve been rewatching old episodes like Still, Alone, and others, with an eye toward what we’ve learned from S10 and especially the bonus episodes. And we’re realizing there’s a lot more foreshadowing in them than we ever realized before. Most of what’s in them we’ve looked at in terms of the Bethyl romance and of course Beth’s return, but I for one have never thought to go beyond that. Yeah, I REALLY should have.

So here’s the thing. We always talk about Daryl searching for people, but Beth was searching for liquor in that episode. I've never really thought to connect those two things. It either represents the same template of Daryl's search for her, or it might represent her searching for him. But then, those two templates may be one and the same. I need to think on it more and make more connections.

One thing it did make me think of, though, is that there's a theme about not accepting the first and only thing that comes your way, because there's something bigger, better, happier, more fulfilling down the road. So, Daryl didn't want Beth to drink the peach schnapps because that's a weak drink. He wanted her to have a REAL drink. And of course we've talked about this theme in terms of the peach schnapps before.

But we kind of see it everywhere, including in relationships. The small, short term relationships all follow this pattern. Maybe it’s not a terrible relationship, but it’s not true love, either. So they need to move on from it and find the more perfect relationship for them. The locations or homes do, too. So, in 4b, we saw each of the groups stop somewhere and try to stay. And it wasn't so much that they chose not to. More often than not, circumstances forced them to leave. But still. The theme is that it was better that they moved on so a bigger reunion could take place.

And on that note, Leah really still does fit the short-term relationship pattern. If the point was to always show short term relationships that weren't ideal and something better coming down the road, that's why they wanted to do something like this for Daryl. Beth is obviously going to be the much better, more fitting, more fulfilling relationship, where he belongs, etc. But I think they knew they couldn't do that without doing a disservice to Daryl's character. The only way to satisfy both criteria was to make her a hallucination. So the pattern is still there, but for him, it's not a real or literal relationship.

Find Me Theme

So, @wdway​ is the one who reminded me of this. Back in 9x05, Rick gets hurt and starts hallucinating right before blowing up the bridge and being taken to the CRM by Jadis, right? All on the same page? Well, in that episode, there’s a huge theme about Rick finding his family. In every hallucination, he tells the people he sees—Shane, Hershel, etc—that he’s looking for his family and needs to find them. Near the end, he hallucinates Michonne and the others being with him on the bridge, and Michonne tells him that they’re his family and he did find them. Then, just before he shoots the dynamite, he says, “I found them.”

And now we have this episode called “Find Me” where Daryl is obsessively searching for Rick, and there’s a ridiculous amount of Beth symbolism thrown in. Are we seeing the over-arching theme?

So, what does this mean? I don’t think I’ve really pinned it all down, yet. But I do think this is an over-arching theme for the entire show. I think in some ways, “home” and “family” are synonymous, because home is wherever your family is. It’s not a physical location.

But we started out with Rick looking for Carl and Lori. Then Merle went missing, and Daryl searched for him. Everyone searched for Sophia when she disappeared. And the list goes on and on. So it’s a big theme. I’ve always said Andy didn’t leave the show just to spend more time with his family. That’s a happy bonus, I’m sure. But this was always a planned part of the story. Now Michonne is actively looking for Rick, we see Daryl searching for his body. And the reason Beth symbolism is thrown in is because he searched for her, but they didn’t show us that and won’t because it would be spoilery. And Beth is alive, even if Daryl doesn’t know it. And yeah, I could go on and on. Just wanted to point out this theme and how important it is. Which leads me to….

The Three Spikes

The last thing I’ll mention is the grouping of the three spikes he sees both by the door and on the outside of the house that we’ve all been trying to interpret. I kind of had a breakthrough the other night. But the thing is, it’s not just a breakthrough on the three spikes.

It’s kind of a breakthrough on the ENTIRE rule of threes theme. It’s actually kind of epic.

So here’s how I came to this. I was going over the template in my head, yet again, that I mentioned is shown both here, in 6x03, and that will be in the spinoff. So let’s run through it. We’ll use this episode, 10x18, as the example. So, Daryl is searching for Rick, right? And Carol wants him to stop and come back with her to where Zeke and Henry are. Those are two possible choices for him. But there’s also a third: staying with Leah.

Similarly, in 6x03, Daryl goes searching for Rick, rather than staying with Sasha and Abraham. Those are the two things he’s trying to decide between, and he eventually goes back to Sashraham. 

Now, there is actually a third choice there. It’s just that Daryl doesn’t seriously consider it. The third choice is going back to Alexandria to help them. And this IS addressed in the episode because they talk about how they don’t know what happened, but some loud noise pulled half the herd off the road. We, the viewers, know it’s the Wolves, but Daryl, Sasha, and Abe really didn’t know what was going on there. And who is back in Alexandria, spear-heading the defensive against the wolves? Carol!

So you see what I mean. There are three possible choices there: find Rick, go with Carol, or stay with Sashraham. And I’ve said forever that Sashraham = Beth/Bethyl. And of course so does Leah. So the third choice is always the one that represents Beth.

Do you see where I’m going with this? If not, I’ll just tell you. This represents three different paths for Daryl. They’ll diverge at some point and he’ll have to make a choice about which one to take. And then I realized—duh!—they’re all actually represented for us here in this episode. Not only because of what I said above, but because Leah lays them out in her ultimatum. Where do you belong 1) out looking endlessly for your brother 2) back at the communities with your family (i.e. Carol) or 3) here with me.

So those are the three paths that he’ll have to choose between during the spinoff. That’s what the spikes are about, because they specifically dealt with his three choices in this episode. But that may even be the reason they used the rule of threes around Beth to begin with. She’s the third and correct path.

Want more proof this is a thing? @wdway​ sent me this pic after I first told her about it:

And guys, go back and watch this. When he gets to the crossroads, the camera pans around him, showing him being unsure about which path to take.

Then, while writing this up, I remembered that this did this in 6x03 as well:

On the left is Daryl on his bike, rejoining Sasha and Abraham who are coming down from the top.

Yeah, 3 paths. 3 spikes. Rule of 3s. Who’s excited for the spinoff? 🙋

Now, just one more thing not add to this I think you all will like. In re-watching 9x05, there’s the part where Rick hallucinates Shane, right? Well, part of their conversation there is about the “third man.” And I’ve talked about this before, but probably not nearly enough, because it’s more important than most of us give it credit for. Rick and Shane talk about when Rick was shot in 1x01 before the apocalypse hit. They say they thought there was only 2 men, but there was a third they didn’t know about and “that changed everything.”

I always saw that as perhaps a statement about Grady. Because they should have had three prisoners for the hostage exchange, where Dawn only had two (Carol and Beth). But after Rick killed Lambson, they only had two. If they’d had three, Dawn wouldn’t have been able to demand Noah back, because it would have been an even exchange. So the third man would have changed everything.

Another way to think about it is that, if the shot that hit Beth didn’t come from Dawn—and it REALLY didn’t, y’all) then there was another threat somewhere that they couldn’t see and didn’t know about. If they had, they might have been able to guard against it. See what I mean? I genuinely believe they used Rick’s arc in 1x01 as a jumping off point for planning what happened at Grady.

So, when I rewatched 9x05 and heard this conversation between Rick and Shane yet again, it made me think of the three spikes and Daryl’s 3 paths. So what if he only knows about the two paths he can take: look for Rick or go with Carol. But there’s a third path he’s not aware of, yet. But the third path changes everything. Because that’s where/how he’ll find Beth.

Eh, eh?

Okay, well, I’ve given you enough to chew on today. These are just some things we’ve been discussing from the episode that just keeps on giving. ;D Meanwhile, episode 19 will be airing in a few days, and it will be fabulous, too. Probably not quite as epic as 10x18, but still fabulous. ;D Thoughts?

[dancing-the-hellfire-rumba]

Seen ✓ - 2

Pairing: Sam x Fem!Reader Warnings: light anxiety Word Count: 2.2k Series Summary: On her way home, Y/n finds an abandoned, cracked phone on the sidewalk. Anxious about the well-being of its owner, she picks it up and texts the first contact she finds; Sam. A/N: Chapter 2! Our pals are kicking it off already. Can you smell the chemistry? The rOMANCE? LESSGO

Pictures used in this chapter were found on google images :)

Beta: no one.

Catch up! : Part 1 Masterlist

Chapter 2: overthinker.

From: y/n_andrews85 To: D_impala67 Subject: I have your phone. That sounds creepy. I don’t think there’s a non-creepy way of writing this. Whatever.

Dear Dean, is it?

I just wanted to let you know I found your phone at the bus stop the other night. I wasn’t planning on holding on to it, really, but I got worried that you may have been in trouble, and then you never really looked for it either so, I don’t know, I figured better than someone who’ll snatch it and leave, you know?

Anyways, that’s why I’m emailing. I snooped through it a little, sorry, hopefully you’ll understand it was kinda necessary? Maybe we can arrange something so I can get it back to you. This girl, Jamie, keeps sending me (well you technically) topless photos of her. It’s not really what lights my candle. I’m assuming you’d like it back too.

I hope you’re safe. Looking forward to hearing back from you!

Y/n Andrews

-

Do you believe me now?

oh god

you didn’t

Sure did

wow. just wow.

you just handed his ass back to him holy shit!

last time he called, he said he dropped his phone while walking back to his motel, so

he’s okay.

That’s good, I’m glad he’s safe.

I was planning on including something along the lines of “This would’ve been easier if you were an active member of the 21st century and used social media”

But I figured the Jamie thing was motive enough?

yeah. topless Jamie? that’s something else.

Don’t be getting any ideas, dude, I don’t do nudes lmao.

oh god, no i didn’t think that

you did not just type lmao though. how old are you again?

oh god, you’re not 14 or something right? i don’t know what that would make me.

Don’t worry about it, I turned 16 last week.

…

are you serious?

Lmao, no, I’m kidding. I’m twenty-two.

But I think the word you’re looking for is a creep. Oh, and an ageist.

ouch.

Haha, I’m joking.

Lighten up, what are you, ninety?

hi pot meet kettle.

Shit I walked right into that one.

also i’d like to think i don’t text like a ninety-year-old man. could be wrong though

to answer your question i’m twenty-four.                                

Twenty-four huh? I assume you’re done with college, no?

Or- wait, I guess not everyone goes to college.

Yes, this is me fishing for information.

well… i kinda dropped out.

decided to go on a road trip with my brother.

things went a little south I ended up continuing the family business.

Damn, college drop-out ey? Where from?

Also, Family business? What do you do?

Is this too interview-y? I’m sorry, I don’t mean to snoop.

you’re good.

stanford. pre-law.

and my brother and i are private investigators. that’s why he’s not in Kansas with me. he’s working a case.

Daaaaamn. Stanford AND a lawyer? And now working as a PI? You’re pretty smart, then.

an ageist and a generalist? i didn’t take you for such y/n.

Fuck, okay, you sound like a lawyer too.

hahahah

so what about you?

What about me?

are you in college?

Oh yeah! Film school. My dream has always been to be a director. It’s rare to find someone who loves movies more than I do.

that’s really cool.

hey i’ve been meaning to ask.

Thinking of me, Sam?

…

Do tell.

how come you were walking home through a park in the middle of the night the other day?

Ooh, I was coming back from work.

I’m a bartender and I had a late shift on Friday.

oh I see. That makes sense yeah.

I’m sorry to cut this conversation short, but I’m legitimately three seconds away from falling asleep. I’m gonna hit the hay.

See you later, Sam :)

See you, y/n :)

A smile creeps on Y/n’s features at the thought of more conversations with Sam. He has given her something to look forward to, something to make her a little more excited during her boring every-day life. As she tucks herself in under her covers, eyelids heavy enough to droop involuntarily, the last thing she thinks of is him, the clever, sassy, twenty-four year old college dropout on the other side of the cracked phone screen. The overwhelming urge to get to know him overtakes her as she succumbs to sleep

--

So

Do you believe in ghosts?

that’s… random.

May be

why do you ask?

Idk, just wanna get to know you better.

that’s what you ask people you want to get to know better?

Yes?

Are you avoiding the question?

no

i do. believe in ghosts.

You?

So do i.

Well, sorta. I guess I believe in souls more than anything.

hm?

Well… I guess I hope (more than believe) that we are more than our corporeal selves.

In the sense that, it’s comforting to me that when we die, and our bodies stop working, we don’t evaporate.

I guess.

yeah I understand.

i don’t know. i guess i wanna believe in science more than anything but i know better.

How do you mean?

call it a hunch.

Oh c’mon, it’s gotta be more than that.

Sam…?

Y/n huffs out a breath, gnawing at her lip. She hopes her anxiety isn’t right, that Sam isn’t sick of her silly questions and existential dread, and is actually doing something. Perhaps his battery ran out.

...Sure.

She was doing something too, before she decided to text him. Eyes falling on all her books and notes, spread around her like ugly, depressing, anxiety-inducing flower petals. There’s a blanket over her legs, chilly fall weather seeping through her bones, and there’s a half empty pizza box in front of her. She’s full and the left overs are kept for her sister, Emily, who’s currently locked up in her room.

Damn it. Y/n is stressed and tired, and now her distraction is refusing to reply. This sucks. She hates the crawling, awful, gooey feeling of cold anxiety gripping every beat of her heart and stupidly convincing her he’s purposefully ghosting her, because he doesn’t like her.

Not knowing what to occupy herself with, she heads to take a shower. In the back of her head, she knows that she’ll probably not study any longer, so she takes it upon herself to sink under the hot water and wash thoroughly, trying to get her mind off Dean’s phone. When her feet step out of the shower and she has towel-dried herself as best as she can, she tosses her wet hair in a haphazard bun, and gets dressed.

Books stack under the rickety, stained coffee table, and she grabs her sketchbook, her favorite pencil, as well as her and Dean’s phone. She shoots Connor a text, arranging a hang out of some kind, and opens her little booklet, when a text vibrates Dean’s phone.

hey i’m sorry i got caught up in something.

It’s alright.

She doesn’t press the ghost subject, because he doesn’t seem into it and she really doesn’t wanna make him dislike her any more than he possibly already does.

The empty page of her sketchbook daunts her. With a tight grip on her mechanical pencil, she urges her creativity pumps to use some gasoline, but they seem limp and dead, and once more unwilling to help her. As her eyes fall on Dean’s phone, like a light bulb out of a cartoon, she gets an idea.

Hey, this might sound creepy, but what do you look like?

She stares at the phone. This feels like a risky question. God, if he wasn’t done with her before, he certainly must be now. But then, he surprises her.

why do you wanna know?

I’m in the mood to sketch some, and my creativity has officially left the building.

Care to help a girl out? Maybe your literary descriptions will spark something in me lmao.

i didn’t know you sketched.

Yeah, sometimes. Nothing great though, I promise. I’m certainly no Picasso.

i mean you don’t have to be picasso to sketch well. and you don’t have to sketch well to sketch at all.

Yeah, may be.

I don’t wanna pressure you into anything, you really don’t have to humor me.

If you do feel like it though, don’t send me a picture. Kinda wanna spark some life into my brain cells.

haha i will. only if you show me the finished product tho.

You’ve got yourself a deal :)

She simply cannot believe he has just agreed to this. Her breath is caught in her throat.

so.

what do you want me to start with?

Just whatever. Idk, tell me about your face.

well

i have brown curly-ish hair that reaches my ears. uh, my eyes are hazel.

Okay, that’s a start.

What’s your nose like?

it’s a bit pointy. thin i think?

Jawline?

sharp? i guess?

this is by far the weirdest thing i’ve done.

Lmao, yeah, this is pretty weird.

Exciting though.

She shouldn’t have said that. Fuck, that is definitely overeager.

yeah it is.

Her stomach feels floaty at his response.

Eyebrows?

uh

normal?

How do you classify “normal” eyebrows, exactly?

i don’t know? they’re simple i guess.

Are you implying complicated eyebrows exist out there?

…

Elaborate, Sam. Are you shy? Do you not have eyebrows? Are they bushy? Or too thin? Or pointy?

i’m telling you they’re average.

Sam

what

You officially suck at this.

oh fuck off how would you describe yours?

Y/n proceeds to write a cohesive sentence that includes adjectives apart from “normal” and “average”. Words like bushy, thin, arched and curvy.

well shit yeah i guess i do suck at this.

i think it’s not a skill i mind not having.

That… is a confusing sentence.

just… draw them however. what difference can eyebrows make?

Oh you have no idea.

Okay, last thing.

Do you have a fringe?

yeah but not for long. i’ll probably let it grow out.

Okay, I can do something with that. Thanks :)

no problem

Her creativity is finally servicing her according to her commands, and Y/n puts pen to paper and scribbles messily. Line after line, they curl and sit on the page, forming a smile with thin lips, a sharp jaw, a pointy nose. She has to guess the eyebrows a bit, and the eyes are more cartoonish and generic than she likes. In the end, she gets anxious at the prospect of having to show him, and gives him a hood, so she won’t fuck up the hair.

Okay, I’m done.

that was quick, actually.

Well I didn’t have much to go on.

Sam doesn’t reply. She worries he might have misinterpreted her teasing tone.

Gimme a sec, I’ll send it over.

Ugh, Dean’s camera is such shit. Do you mind if I send it from my phone?

no go ahead.

[Y/n has sent a picture]

As you said, it didn’t take long. It’s really not the best.

that…

is actually not too far from the truth

it kind of looks like me from two years ago

wow, really?

yeah.

and it’s honestly a pretty good sketch. good job.

Thank you :)

Sam doesn’t say anything after this, and she huffs. Her head falls back on the couch, and she stares at the ceiling. She should go to bed soon, it’s getting late.

isn’t this strange?

Oh shit. Oh shit, oh shit oh shit, she thinks. He’s regretting this. He doesn’t like her. He’ll stop talking to her and that’ll be it.

Why does she care so much? It’s a thought that passes through her mind. It hasn’t been long since they started talking and, after the near-kidnapping encounter, they’ve been having nearly daily conversations, but that still doesn’t mean much. She knows barely anything about him.

She guesses, she wants to get to know him better. He seems like the type of guy she’d enjoy hanging out with and she has so far. Stopping any kind of conversation would surely feel like a loss. She’d have to go back to her boring routine. This is the most exciting thing she has allowed herself to do in years.

A part of her feels rather lame for finding such a thrill at something so trivial. She’s talking to a stranger, and that’s all it is, but the prospect that he could be anyone at all, and she’s never even seen his face… well… It feels refreshing, new. Scary in an adrenaline-rush kind of way.

What is?

us. texting.

isn’t it a little odd?

I guess it is a bit.

I mean we’ve only known each other for, what, a week? And a half?

yeah.

should we stop?

I don’t know

Do you want to?

The extra moment his reply takes to arrive makes her want to vomit.

no

Then there’s your answer.

okay then

can I save you in my contacts?

Sure, go ahead.

I just did too.

alright.

Okay :)

I’m sorry, I have to go.

I guess I’ll text you later, Sam.

Go be whoever Sam Something is.

it’s winchester.

Like the shotgun?

yup.

That’s BADASS. Can you even get more badass than this? Pre-law, now a PI, and you’re named after a shotgun? Damn dude.

Well, it’s nice to meet you Sam. I’m Y/n Andrews.

Haha thanks.

nice to meet you, too

goodnight Y/n Andrews.

Night Sam Winchester :)

--- Part 3

A/N: Thoughts? How are you liking the newer version of this? right after I post it, I’m gonna delete the other one.

Taglist:

Old Can You See The Stars taglist: @shutupiminlooove @sammysgirl1997 @kymberlytorres @bambi95-blog @demonic-meatball @thekarliwinchester @littlekay15 @li-m-ii  @thinspo-isuppose @carryonmywaywarddemigodwitch @ellen-reincarnated1967 @moonlitskinwalker @marichromatic @illuminatus42 @lazy-author @mirandaaustin93 @hauntedsiriel @pilaxia @devilgirlsarah @nobodys-baby-now @captiveties @calamitychaos @midiocris @wordswillscream​

Sam taglist @kymberlytorres @theboykingsam @depressed-moose-78 @andi-mendes-barnes @captainmarvelcorps @nerd-in-a-galaxy-far-away @nellachain

[lollercakesff]

And They Were Strangers

Jyn Erso has been prepping for this for months. Years even, if you count the endless hours she'd spent running pools and hosting watch nights with her college roommates. She'd choreographed hundreds of dollars in auctions for remaining teams and had led multiple nights where her and her friends cooked their way around the world with the country of the week. The memories were great, sure, but to say she didn't feel a connection with this path in her life would be a lie. Something drew her in, tied her up, and convinced her that this - this - was the thing she needed to do before she died.

And now it was time. She was ready. Mentally… Physically… Hopefully.

AN: Will I finish writing this? I have a plan... But is it worth my time?

But the path to her next adventure was currently being blocked by some too-tall goon with haphazard hair and piercing dark eyes who kept getting in her way. First at check in, then in line for security, and now at the boarding gate. They’d practically been together, crossing paths and crashing each other, since she entered this damn airport and it was starting to really get to her. 

"Are you planning on getting on this plane or just standing in the way?" Jyn growls under her breath when the man doesn't move forward with the gate agent's call.

"What - Oh," he leaps forward a step and hustles towards the woman, pulling his passport from his pocket as Jyn sighs and checks her papers again. 

Her new American passport feels heavy in her hand, its empty pages a sign of things to come. She was on her way to Los Angeles where she was scheduled to show up at her first and only briefing for the next season of the Amazing Race. The producers had promised a full day of orientation covering the rules of the race and how the team match up would work before the "trip of a lifetime" began the next day. She was trying not to stress about it but she didn't quite know what she was getting into. 

This was the first season where every team in the race would be a set of strangers. They'd all meet at the briefing but it wouldn't be until the start of the race when they'd learn who their partner was. The producers had billed it as the season of 'fate' where they tried to pick a winning team by pure dumb luck with names drawn from a hat. Or so she'd been told. Who knew how it would really work.

"Next!" The agent calls and Jyn scurries forward, passing her documents over and brushing her bangs from her face. In another second she's motioned through and she's heading down the gangway and onto the plane. 

When she gets to her seat her frustration returns tenfold as the man from before has settled himself in her seat by the window, his seatbelt already clipped and his attention turned towards the action on the tarmac. 

"Hey, you're in my seat," she greets, stuffing her duffle in the overhead bin.

"F? Window?" He answers with an almost-accent and a quirk to his lips. Jyn frowns and steps into the row to let the people behind her pass.

"Yes. That's my seat, can you move please?" 

"I was sure I had the window, I feel claustrophobic if I can't see out - "

"Yeah, I'm sure. Can you check your boarding pass?" She asks, cutting his sob story off before it can even get started. 

"Can't I just have it this one time? It's a short flight," he answers, making no move to relent. Jyn sighs and drops into the seat next to him, her eyes closing tight as she urges the irritation to ease. 

"Fine. But this is bad karma and I hope it comes back to bite you in the ass, asshole," she grumbles the last part, determined to insult him but not loud enough to cause a scene. The man coughs as if to hide a laugh and Jyn hates him even more, pulling up her hood and taking out her headphones.

She was going to spend the next two hours in a music haven, mentally far from this man and the constant bumping of her elbow that came from sitting in the aisle row. Soon she'd be in LA at her hotel and then she'd be on to a new country, with a new language and culture that she'd have to work with to get her team to the finish line. Then she’d do it again and again until they won. Or they lost. She didn't like to think about that last possibility so instead she closes her eyes and hits play.

---

The hotel bed is more luxurious than anything she's ever slept in in her life and when she wakes it's with a curse as she realizes she's almost late to the briefing. Hustling around the room, she nearly crashes onto the floor when her pants get tangled and she loses her balance. Cursing out her alarm, her beautiful sleep, and the time difference, Jyn pulls on her t-shirt just as she pulls open her door and slams into someone walking past her room.

"Shit, sorry!” She gasps as she rights herself and pulls back. When she looks up it’s to find the man from the plane. The one who wouldn’t give her back her seat. The one who’d been a pain in the ass all day. “You!” The man’s eyes widen and he looks around him like he’s being Punk’d, surprise in his brow. 

“From the plane?” He counters, as if he was still struggling to place her. 

“Yeah. What, are you following me? How did you know to find me here?” Jyn growls, crossing her arms. The man cocks his head and furrows his brow, looking at her as though she was crazy. 

“Follow you? I’m here for… A thing that has nothing to do with you. If anything, I’d think you’re stalking me,” he adds sharply. Jyn scowls and shakes her head, her watch beeping with her five minute alarm. 

“Sure. Fine, whatever. I won’t be here long enough to have this happen again. Have a good life!” She shouts as she hurries off down the hall, her hand flung up into the air and her middle finger pointed towards him. 

She takes the stairs down to the conference room because getting stuck in the elevator with that jerk would put her nerves over the edge, their already frayed status from the late wakeup making her more punchy than usual. By the time she barrels into the room and grabs a plate of the breakfast, the producer is calling everyone to a seat. 

Jyn moves towards an empty chair and begins measuring up her fellow racers, her eyes drifting over one person and then the next as they settle in a semi-circle around the speaker. Some of them were incredibly fit, others a bit paunchy but she figured they could probably take her in a memory challenge or two if it came down to it. Most of them were on the younger side, maybe in their twenties or thirties, though there were a few who easily slotted into their fifties at the very least. She didn’t want to be ageist but she secretly hoped she’d get paired with someone who could keep up with her at the very least and she didn’t really peg any of these older folks as marathoners. 

“Welcome, good morning everyone!” A young woman calls out, drawing their attention to the front of the room. Jyn sits up and nimbles on a muffin, trying to look intimidating to the others around her who she assumed were doing the measuring up as she had just been. 

“You’re in my seat,” a voice says over her shoulder. Jyn’s stomach drops and she frowns, looking back to find the man from the airplane and the hallway standing behind her. “Don’t worry though, I’m not going to make you move, I’ll just take this empty one here.” 

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Jyn hisses, clenching her hands and nearly crushing her muffin to pieces. 

“Nope,” he responds as he sits in the chair next to her. An insult is on the tip of her tongue when the woman calls out again and really takes control of the room, beginning with a welcome spiel before moving right into the security briefing. After the team has explained every terrifying aspect about the world in explicit detail, Jyn looks around the room and finds half of the contestants with a concerned look on their faces, the other half grinning wickedly at the challenge. Beside her the man keeps his expression reserved though his eyes are calculating, the look making her guess whether he was regretting his choice or simply bored. 

After the welcome session, they’re broken up into groups of four and are led to a table in the corner of the room. Jyn sighs a breath of relief as the man is placed in another group, his presence finally dissipating and allowing her to focus on the tasks at hand instead of the prickling skin she felt whenever he was close. 

Hours pass and the contestants are moved around the room to different stations where they focus on different aspects of the game. There’s logic tests and geography quizzes which she passes with flying colours but when it comes to the language skills and memory games she flounders, her attention twisting towards her fellow contestants. She spends half the time trying to measure up where they stand on these activities, who would be best suited to the way she wanted to run this race. 

Her strategy - based on years of watching the show - was to run with brute force. She would power through on the physical challenges and when it came to figuring out a puzzle she was set. She just needed a partner who would be able to keep up and rush into everything just as hard. Smarts weren’t what won you the race, it was being able to push your way through anything and she had trained to do just that. 

“Everyone now has an hour for lunch. Feel free to get to know each other and remember, these folks might be your competition or they might just be the person you cross that finish line with!” The producer from earlier calls as the stations are closed and the participants are left to loiter in the room. 

Jyn feels like she’s in a social experiment as she beelines towards the food table to take a plate. She loads it up with everything she’s going to miss for the next few weeks - caesar salad and french fries and pasta salad that looked too delicious to miss. When she settles at a table she’s quickly joined by a handful of others, the conversation easily picking up from the morning activities.

“I’m Bodhi Rook, you?” The man sitting next to her says around a forkful of salad. Jyn looks him over quickly and notes his tall frame and long hair, his thin frame and open expression. He could be a good partner - she’d seen him race through some of the challenges with an efficiency she admired. 

“Jyn Erso,” she answers, lifting her hand to offer a shake. Bodhi takes it and squeezes it before turning back to his food, diving in as she looks around the table at the others. “You heard anything about how we’re going to be assigned teams?” She asks after a few minutes, her water lifting to her lips. 

“Not really. My group thought maybe the stations were to see where our strengths were so they could match us up better. But I was also told it would be a name in a hat, so who knows what they’re planning.” 

“Yeah, I heard the hat thing too. I hope there’s a little more thought put into it,” she responds with a shrug. Bodhi nods and lets a laugh escape. 

“Either way, I think I’ll be okay. I just like the adventure of it, you know? Don’t really need to win the whole thing,” he says around another bite. 

Jyn frowns and looks at her food, debating internally whether she could be paired with someone who didn’t want to win the whole race. If she had to admit it - though she’d never say it on camera - she wasn’t here just because she liked the show and wanted to see the world. 

She was here because she needed the prize money. 

The thought creeps up on her and she pushes it back down, stuffing it into her chest like too many clothes in a carry on bag. She didn’t have time to think about it now, not when she should be sizing up her competition and thinking about U-Turn and Yield strategy. No. She needed to focus. 

“What about everyone else?” Bodhi asks the table when Jyn still doesn’t respond. She turns her attention to the people around them, listening as first a bright eyed Luke Skywalker and a gruff Baze Malbus explain their motivations before moving on to Leia Organa, a beautiful but strategic thinker, and her cocky puppy-dog-tail for-the-day Han Solo easily admits he’s only here for the money. Jyn can’t help but think he might be her real competition if they don’t get paired together, the gleam of a quick buck in his eyes adding to his boisterous energy. 

Taking another glance around the room, Jyn weighs the rest of her competition as they sit at two other tables. Sixteen racers in total, all with different motivations and experiences that they bring to the table. They’d be eight teams and the producers had all but guaranteed it would be a tough race with all of them having secret strengths that were admitted in their bio videos. Jyn can’t remember what hers ss but by the time she turns back to the conversation at hand, she already knows one thing is for sure - she’s going to win, even if it kills her. 

After lunch they’re broken off into individual briefing rooms where they’re given their racing issued equipment and a final check in with the producers before they’re sent off to their rooms to pack. In the morning they’ll all be meeting in the lobby to hand over their backpacks before heading to the starting line. 

When the race starts their first activity will be finding their matched backpack with a coloured bandana tied to it. The racer with the matching bandana will be their partner for the duration and it will either be a successful match or a story of just how quickly Jyn can crash and burn their team. 

Throughout the evening she tries not to think about it - pushing away thoughts of how hectic tomorrow would be, how much adrenaline is already rolling in her veins and just how is she supposed to sleep tonight? To distract herself she focuses on potential strategies depending on who she paired with in the morning. Baze could work, or she’d even probably be successful with Han if they didn’t rip each other's heads off. Bodhi would be a great candidate - he seemed relaxed and competent, but Jyn didn’t like that he wasn’t driven by the final prize so much as he just wanted to have an adventure. 

No, she could pair with most of the people she’d met that morning. With the very real exception of the man from the plane who she’d learned was named Cassian Andor. There was no way they would be able to work together to even get out of the States, their partnership tanking before they even took their first flight. She was sure of it. And so when she falls asleep that night it’s to the thought that she had a one in fifteen chance of failing and those were pretty good odds. 

---

Morning comes in a rush of excitement and insanity and a paranoia that she’s forgotten something even though she’s checked her bags at least a dozen times. When she gets to the lobby, the assistants take her old bags and mark them with her tags before collecting her race bag and shoving it onto a luggage cart with the other packs. She’s directed to a holding queue where the racers mill about, snacking on the continental breakfast and filling their water bottles. 

Twenty minutes later and they’re piled onto a bus. Thirty minutes later and they’re being placed around an empty field with only the production crew circling them and a pile of luggage in the center of the field. Jyn thinks she spots her bag with a blue tag and she grins, looking around at the nervous faces she was up against. 

“You’ve got this,” she whispers to herself as Phil Keoghan begins his speech from near the luggage pile. Adrenaline spikes in her blood and then there’s a horn and she’s racing forward, scrambling for the luggage pile and her bag with its bandana looped through the arm. She pulls it free and stumbles back, looking around at the other racers as they take in their own colours, desperately looking for their partner. 

Not Bodhi. Not Baze. Fuck, not even Han. She scours the faces and colours until she sees it - blue, like hers! She steps forward, her smile widening having finally found her partner. 

But then she looks up. And her eyes meet her partner’s. 

Dark brown meeting green.

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“Guess you’re stuck with someone with bad karma,” he says evenly, the nerve of it making her want to pull her hair out. She curses again and grabs for his arm, dragging him towards the clue box for their next instructions. They didn’t have time to waste on pleasantries and witty comebacks, not if they wanted to win. 

She could do this. Brute force was all it would take, right? 

[a-crash-in-time-collection]

Chapter 7: The Return Of An Old Freind

As tough as the clan may be at first sight, worry could spread quickly among them. At first it wasn't anything grand, as Sven would explain the leaders were looking for better shelter. It was when their children and the ghost seemed to leave and failed to come back when everyone allowed themselves to show what they were feeling. And while they were relieved when the family came back, many were confused and worried.

Admintly, Right Hand Man's eyes were the main thing that kept the worry from disappearing. At first, second, and many more glances, it appeared that some sort of blue gem had grown over the robotic side of his face. Like some sort of creature was trying to take from, and using him as a host of sorts. Needless to say, many were shocked to find out it was ice. That was all they needed to hear to understand they weren't getting better shelter anytime soon.

Right Hand Man ended up getting scolded a bit by the head of the medical department, Shelia, why she tried to remove the ice from his eye. Right Hand Man just silently took it all, although since it covered his metal side, he felt she was overreacting. However, it was taking a while for the ice to be removed. After about an hour of trying, it was clear melting it alone wasn't going to do any good.

Reginald at frist objected to the idea of trying to chip it off his eye, for fear of it hitting and breaking the glass. However, he agreed after it was pointed out the ice being there too long could cause issues, whether they broke the glass in the end or not. He just sat beside Right Hand Man, looking away and occasionally flinching at the sound of ice being chipped away. It was almost like waiting out a storm.

Eventually, all the ice was removed, allowing the two to leave and start to find the next step in their plan. By now, evening had come, the area getting darker, but not where it was impossible to see. The sky started to look more like a painting then the bright or dark blue it was usually known by everyone for. Reginald let a small smile from on his face at the sight. Before a blush also formed as a rumble went through the air, him grabbing his stomach slightly.

"'ungery, Are we?" Right Hand Man asked teasingly, chuckling slightly when he got a huff in return. He rubbed where his cybernetic eye was slightly, and nearly jolted back at the sudden chill. Ok, maybe Sheila did have a bit of a point when she was scolding him. Not that he was paying attention. He glanced back at his husband. "'ey, I am too, no need to be worried about it. We'll just grab somet'in' from t'e box again."

"The box was nearly empty this morning, probably is empty now." Reginald sighed, glancing back at Right Hand Man as the two approached where the others were. "I suppose we could see if we can have some of those large cherries from the forest... although I don't trust the colour."

"Out of all t'e t'ings you could possibly not trust in t'at g'ost's woods, it's t'e color of some fruit?" Right Hand Man shook his head in a playful manner, but Reginald just gave him a faint stare. He knew the hidden meaning behind that, and Right Hand Man knew he knew. The cyborg let out a sigh. "Look, I know you say we can trust 'im, and I'll admit, 'e could've just left t'e kids alone in t'at place, but still..."

"You get a bad feeling and think we shouldn't trust him." Reginald finished for him, shaking a head to the side. He rubbed his gloved hand slightly, trying to get rid of some of the cold from earlier. "I know you don't. But please, just give him a chance. I'm sure he means well. Just has his... own way of expressing it.. right Hattie?" Reginald called as she entered his sights.

She glanced over at the two. "If it's about something good with Snatcher, yes." She said, watching Right Hand Man glance to the side and Reginald giving a small grin in response. She rolled her eyes, before letting out a slight yawn. "Weird... I'm not really tried, but I am at the same time." She noted aloud, getting a slight eye roll from Platinum, who would never know the definition of being tried.

"I'm surprised I haven't collapsed into a coma by now." Burt added, getting a slight glare from Sven beside him. "I haven't had any coffee in two days. Two days! I asked Mr. Thicc to just throw a pot over a fire and make some and he said no!"

"Because it would ruin the pot, Burt." The chef explained triedly, having sat down ageist the edge of the orbital station's broken off wall. He knew Burt wasn't trying to be mean, it's just the guy seemed to think if he didn't have coffee, he was going to mess everything up or something. Not that he would ever share those thoughts aloud. "And the last thing we need is pots being ruined. We'll need them for when the kitchen is working again."

"You mean if, at this point." Sven sighed, leaning against Calla triedly. He smiled as he felt her grab his shoulders, most likely to keep him steady even though he could stand fine on his own. He then noticed some of the others staring at him. "What? I hate to say it, but I'm just being honest here. We have no way to properly fix half of the inside alone!"

"We know Sven, trust me, we know." Reginald sighed, glancing down at the ground slightly. He felt Right Hand Man wrap an arm around his shoulder, and while he appreciated his attempt to cheer him up, it wasn't going to do much. Sven glanced down in a bit of shame, glancing at Calla, who for a moment seemed to be in space. "Just don't say that around the others, ok?" Sven nodded, although the look in his eyes said 'not yet'.

"Welp, sucks for you all." Platinum said, shrugging slightly, before getting a slight shove from Hat Girl. He held his hands up in defense, he knew she wasn't going to hurt him, nor meant anything from the shove, but still. "Woah, sorry ok! I was just kidding! Can't a topbot make one joke about how his lack of need for stuff like food is useful?" He asked.

Burt threw his head into his hands, letting out a slight grone. This was the most clear emotion people have seen from Burt in quite a bit. "I blame you for all this, Fredrick." He mumbled, the cheese hat toppat giving a faint glare at him. The others let out faint chuckles, trying to find some humor in this. Burt sighed, crossing his arm as he regained himself. "It's almost like I can still smell food."

"Because I think you do." Calla said, glancing over at him, both him and Sven glancing over to give her a confused look. "I can smell something in the air. And... strangely it smells like it's coming closer. I think?"

Hat Girl took a sniff of the air. "Yeah, I smell it too." Hat Girl said, glancing in the direction it seemed to be the strongest in. It was only then they noticed the bushes at the edge of the woodlands were beginning to shake, like something was inside. Right Hand Man didn't want to take any chances, getting in front of the group and getting his lazer blaster ready. "Papa, wait. They could be harmless!"

Before Right Hand Man had a chance to respond, something gray pushed itself out from the bushes. At first they were a bit startled by the sudden appearance, but then realized it wasn't some sort of creature. It was some sort of serving table with wheels like those in fancy restaurants, only this one was a bit bigger and, as they came to find, longer than those. A strange site, even for a planet like this.

Eventually, it came to a stop, and by now had gotten the attention of some other toppats. Most were questioning how it got here and why. Some seemed to be debating whether or not to quickly garb as much of the silver covered dishes on it as they could.

There was a faint huffing of sorts, faintly able to be heard from the other side. Hat Girl got past Right Hand Man, walking along the tables side to get to the other end. She already had a hunch who it was, she just had questions. After about a minute or two of just walking, she came to the end, and glanced at the figure that was there. She wasn't even surprised when she saw the fur, giving a confused smile. "Cooking Cat?"

"W-Who else?" Cooking Cat asked, trying to catch her breath.

"Are you ok, you look tired." Hat Girl stated, offering the cat a hand. After a moment, the cat took it, and was lifted back onto her feet. She hadn't changed a day, or if she did, it wasn't something visible to the teen girl's eyes. Cooking Cat soon hop onto a empty spot on the table, allowing the two to be more face to face. "What are you even doing out here anyway? I don't take you as the type to get lost."

"Because I'm not lost!" Cooking Cat stated, giving a slight giggle at the confused look she received in response. "I happened to hear about your clan's whole 'crashed on this planet situation' yesterday from two mafia, and I thought I would stop by to help!"

"Hattie?" Reginald called as he walked up to her in confusion, and slight worry. He saw the orange blur appear on the table's side, but didn't know what exactly it was. He knew if Hattie hadn't fallen over by now, it was likely safe, but he had to make sure. He stopped when he noticed the cat in the chef's uniform, a bit surprised at first, but soon the pieces clicked into place. "Oh! Is this one of your friends?"

"Yup!" Hat Girl said, a smile on her face. "This is Cooking Cat! She makes some of the best food on this planet, trust me, I let her use the oven in my ship before! And I guess she brought us this food. How did you know we needed it?" She turned her attention back to the cat.

"Well, I'm not an alien like you all are, but I can assume food isn't a common thing after a ship crashes." She said, shrugging her arms.

Reginald took another glance at the table. The fact she came out here just to give them all this. Sure, most of it likely wouldn't last past a few hours, but they could get what they could save in an icebox or freezer. He smiled, as he turned to the cat. "You have no idea how much this means to us all. I wish we could repay you..."

"There's no need to worry, Mister! As soon as I heard she was back on this planet, I just knew I had to do something for her!" Cooking Cat waved him off, glancing back at Hat Kid with a smile. She then seemed to pause. "You've grown quite a lot these past few years! I mean, I shouldn't be surprised. But I was sorta expecting you would still be your old size.”

"Hey, being an alien doesn't mean I grow any faster or slower than humans." She chuckled slightly, glancing back at Reginald, who gave her a slight smile, before leaving, assuming to start planning how the food would go out. She could faintly see Fredrick holding Burt's shoulder, assumingly to keep him from garbing any and all coffee that could be here. "Oh, while I'm on the topic! How's Mu doing?"

"Why don't cha ask her yourself!" Hat Girl tilted her head to the side at her words. As if on cue, another table of sorts started to come out of the bushes. More stuff was on this one, likely making it slightly heavier. By the time it was all in view, she could see the Mustached Teen appear at the end, wiping her forehead slightly. A small smile formed on Hat Girl's face.

"Mu!" A robotic voice called along with Hat Girl's as the two raced over to the red-hooded girl. Mu spotted them and took a sigh, as if more tried by the sight of them. They soon got by her side, the siblings glancing at each other with a chuckle, before Platinum turned his attention back to the visitor. "Mu! We didn't expect you to show up so soon. We would, well, we would've tried to clean the place up, but uhhh.." He glanced back at the crashed station.

"Wow, that is a lot of cleaning up to do." Mu said after a moment of processing, giving a faint chuckle. "I wasn't planning on coming here today anyway. But Cooking Cat needed some help getting everything here, so I thought I would help. Needed an excuse to the get out of town."

"Well, we're happy to have you here!" She placed a hand on her shoulder. She wanted to give her a hug, but knew Mu wouldn't like that without a warning. Mu rolled her eyes, removing Hat Girl's hand from the shoulder. Platinum wrapped an arm around Hat Girl's shoulder, making her chuckle slightly. She then brought her attention back to Mu. "I'm not sure when exactly we'll get to eat. Most of the members here are probably starving after all."

"Again, one good thing about me being me." Platinum said, watching Hat Girl shake her head and Mu give him a faintly confused look. "Oh! I don't need to eat since I'm a robot. Or drink or the other stuff humans need too. I know, I'm lucky."

"I'm not dumb, I knew that." Mu said, slight offence in her voice. "I was wondering why you think it's so good you're missing out on everything except oil." Platinum's mouth was stuck open in shock, him processing what just happened the best he could. Hat Girl couldn't help it, she let out a laugh that likely drew some attention over to them. Mu tried holding back her own chuckle, but it proved useless in the end.

"Oh my goodness! That was perfect Mu!" Hat Girl said, eventually having to wipe a tear from her eye. As much as she loved her brother, she couldn't help but find it funny when he got like this. "It was so simple, yet so perfect at the same time!" The girls eventually slowed down there laughing and chuckling, and Platinum was able to pull himself out of being a statue, crossing his arms.

"Hattie!" They turned when Reginald's voice was heard, him walking over to the group. By now the smell of food had grown around them, as the food was now exspose to the air. Hat Girl would be lying if she tried to claim her mouth wasn't watering. "Oh, Mu is here too? That's wonderful!" He smiled, before resuming. "It might take a few minutes, but you should get ready to grab your food. And don't steal half the cookies, again, ok?"

She held her hands up in defense at his knowing glare, but couldn't help but let out a giggle. "Don't worry, Dad. It would be bad for me to go for sweets right away anyway." Satisfied with the answer, Reginald gave a nod and walked back to where Right Hand Man was.

A bit of a system was set up so no one tries to rush in for the food. The last thing they needed was it all to go over the ground after all. The younger kids were the first ones, their parents alongside them to help them get it, and so they wouldn't just pick any and all sweets their eyes laid on. The teens would go next, then it was mostly going to go from higher to lower, which everyone seemed alright with.

Hat Girl tried to keep her dish somewhat simple when it came time for her and the other teens to go up. When she walked away, her plate simply had some of the grilled chicken, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, corn, and a breakfast sausage. She was half tempted to dig in at that very second, but wanted to keep her manor-... politeness.

"You know, going two days without food, I thought you would have gotten some more." Mu noted aloud as she came up to where she was. Mu’s plate simply considend of pork chops, green beans, and mashed potatoes, all of which looked like they were just carelessly placed there. Must not have wanted to spend too long on garbing the food. "Unless you have some sort of longer timeframe you all can go without food.

Hat Girl shrugged. "I just didn't want to take too much. There's many people here after all, and I want to be sure we all get something. Although... I was laying my eyes on some of those chocolate strawberries..."

"Yeah, I noticed" Mu snorted, letting out a chuckle as they got near one of the fire pits. Fredrick blew on the wood he held, finally getting a bit of a flame. He tossed it in the fire, and let out a slight strike as it burst to life so suddenly. Burt caught onto him, rolling his visible eye while Platinum couldn't help but laugh. "I suppose this is your first time lighting one?" Mu comment, to which Fredrick pretended she wasn't there.

"Hey, I could probably help, but Dad doesn't like me messing with stuff that could possibly hurt us. Me being made of metal- '' He stopped when he saw a faint glare enter the girls eyes. "Ok, jeez, no more robo talk."

"Thank you." Hat Girl stated, before taking a bite out of her food. Maybe it was just not having anything besides fruit, bread, and bars for the past two days, but her eyes nearly started watering at the taste. This food had to be at least an hour old if it came all the way from mafia town, but it still tasted fresh out of the oven! Or pots. "Man, I knew I said she makes some of the best food on this planet, but I forgotten how good!"

"I don't care for the food itself mostly. My eye is on all that coffee." Burt felt a slight smack, seeing a glare from Fredrick as he pulled his arm back. "What I do and don't eat is not any of your concern. Besides, you're most likely going after the cheese."

"At least I was planning on getting some soup as well! Or any of the actual food over there!" Fredrick pointed his hand over at the table, where now most of the higher ups were trying to get their food, some more picky than others. In response, Burt just shrugged and walked over to the table, leaving Fredrick to let out a frustrated sigh. "I'm going to find Sammy." He mumbled, walking away.

Reginald happened to come over with Right Hand Man then, giving the toppat a confused look. "Is he alright?" he asked, sitting across from where Hat Girl and Mu were. Right Hand Man gently tosses the two a bottle of water, before sitting besides Reginald. "I don't think I've ever seen him this upset before. Then again, we hardly see him."

"Yeah, he's just a little upset about Burt only wanting the coffee. It's weird, they were having a similar conversion before the station crash." Platinum said, shrugging his shoulders slightly. He glanced at his parents dishes, seeing Reginald had picked out that 'fish and chips' dish along with some steak. RHM had steak as well, as well as some roasted potatoes, broccoli and cauliflower. He also had some Strawberry shortcake as well. Guess he must have had a bit of a sweet tooth today.

"So, Mu. If you don't mind me asking." Hat Girl said, getting the blonde to look at her. "You said you needed an excuse to get out of mafia town? How come?" She took another quick bite of food.

"Funny story actually." Mu said, a smirk forming on her face at the thought of it all. "So, I may or might not have found these small pink and purple overalls just laying around. And then sneaked in Mafia HQ. Then waited for Mafia Jar to fall asleep. Then for his guards to leave. Then guled the overalls to the mafia's jar, well, jar." She couldn't help but let out an evil chuckle. "So yeah, pretty sure I have a bounty until those idiots forget about it tomorrow."

The area around the campfire was silent, before Right Hand Man broke out laughing. "T'at's just perfect! 'nd Doin' all t'at at yer age as well!" He felt Reginald garb his shoulder faintly and he calmed down, allowing Platinum's laughter and Hat Girl's giggles to be more clear. "Normally I don't condemn people doin' t'at, but 'e disbursed it."

"How's everyone doing here?" A voice called, the group looking over faintly as the orange cat appeared again. "I figure since everything seems to be going well with the tables, I might as well check on you all!" She glanced at the fire faintly bringing her paws to it for a bit of warmth. "This is really nice. It's a good thing you didn't crash in the desert. Although, you likely have some supper alien tech that could turn sand to fire."

"I'm the only alien of us." Hat Girl said, before pausing a moment. "Well, I guess technically they're aliens too, to this planet at least. But they're just like the humans like Mu on here." She bump a shoulder into that of the red hooded girl. "Besides, even if we had something like that, the sand would become glass."

"Well, that's true I suppose." Cooking Cat shrugged, taking a quick bite out of the fish she brought over. "Say, how did you meet them all anyway? Since they're not your original species and all."

"Her ship crashed on our planet and I happened to see. Thank goodness we got there in time to help her out safely." Reginald looked over at his daughter with a smile, before glancing up slightly, a thought entering his mind. "I wonder if anyone else ever found it. I recall checking the news the first few days and saw nothing about it."

"If anyone's found it by now, MrBeast would have made a 'I Spent 24 Hours In The Mysterious Crashed SpaceShip' video." Platinum comment, getting an eye roll from Right Hand Man.

Mu gave the topbot a confused look. "Who's MrBeast?"

"He's a Youtuber, if you know what that means." Hat Girl said, revising a shrug from Mu in return. "Makes sense, I knew you had a version of Twitter and Ebay here, but wasn't sure about that site. Anyway, he does these crazy challenge videos and a lot of the time puts money on the line. Also gives a lot of it away. Me and Platinum occasionally watch him when we're bored."

"Good guy, then." Mu nodded, seeming pleased with the answer. By now she had finished her plate, and set it off to the side.

"If we ever get a connection to youtube here, we'll be sure to show you!" Platinum said, before gasping. "Maybe we can make some version of Youtube here and use that to get pons! I tried to do the 24 hours on an island challenge once! Only made it to 34 minutes before Pops dragged me back to the airship again."

"I still don't know how you got the drop pod to send you there, those were programmed so anyone under 18 couldn't get themselves in a situation like that!" Reginald let out a tired sigh, leaning against his husband.

"Besides Platinum." Right Hand Man spoke up, rubbing his husband's back slightly. "Makein' videos would be t'e worst way to go around t'e pon situation."

To the cyborg's slight surprised, Platinum didn't try to fight the claim. Instead he just let out a sigh, garbing a nearby log and tossing it into the fire. Reginald just shook his head at the bot, preferring he'd not risk getting burnt but too tired to do anything about it. A frown could be seen on the silver face. "Yeah, Pops. I know..."

The area was slowly getting darker, as evening was slowly turning into night. Only a faint bit of a glowing orange could be seen by the treeline, the sun would be gone within the next hour. By now more camp fires were being lit up, and the glow from metal member's eyes were becoming more noticeable. Small flares would escape from the flame, doing a small dance for the group before burning out and becoming lost to the human eye.

The heat from the fire was becoming more apparent the colder the air around them came. She reached for her neck, losing the scarf slightly to allow it to cool off. She was faintly able to see some member's silhouettes as they got things ready for that night. She was faintly able to see Sven and Calla chatting as the former was grabbing some buckets, while Fredrick worked on setting back up some tents that had fallen earlier that day.

"Cooking Cat, right?" Hat Girl nearly jolted at the sudden voice near the group, turning over to see Mr. Thicc look down at the cat, who nodded with a humm. "I know you must have already gotten this compliment from many others, but I really have to say that your food is amazing. Some of the best I've had in my life."

Cooking Cat gave a smile to the man. "No need for thanks, sir. Cooking for others has always been a passion of mine! Why, that's why I gave myself my name after all!" She gave a small giggle.

"Wait, cooking cat's your rea... You know what. After meeting people named 'Conductor' or 'Mustache Girl' it's too late to ask how names work here." Platinum said, before pausing and looking over at the girls. "Uhh, no offence Mu."

"None taken." Mu shrugged slightly, before pulling her sleeve up as far as it could go.

"'ey, my names Right Hand Man, so I don't 'ave any rig't to start judgein'." Right Hand Man stated as he looked at Mu. "Atltoug' I would be lyin' if I said I didn't find t'e amount of t'ese types of names weird. It's almost like yer all goin' by TV host nicknames."

"Not that I blame you in her case. Cooking Cat does have a show!" Hat Girl piped up.

"Well, it's had now, although you can still stumble upon some episodes on TV." Cooking Cat chime in, letting out a slight giggle as Hat Girl gave her a confused look. "As fun as it was having one, it was starting to get tiring after a while. It did end up giving me enough pons to open a restaurant in Mafia Town!"

"Wow! Now I wished I knew! Would've stop by to say hi yesterday!" Hat Girl said. And it likely would have kept her and Platinum from walking in when they did, ruining the clan's best chance to get pons... A small sigh left her mouth but she kept a smile.

"Bet it took you a while to get your employees to cook as well as you." Mr. Thicc chuckled slightly as he looked down at her.

"Well...." Cooking Cat sighed. "I don't exactly have any employees. Sure I've had many in the past, but none lasted too long and I never had many at a time. Mafia Town isn't the best place to work at if you're not the owner of a place." Mu gave a nod to that statement, despite having no way to know that exact fact. "Had to close the place today just so I could deliver all this."

"I'm so sorry. If we knew you were going to do this for us, we would have found a way to properly pay you for your lost time" Reginald said, a frown forming on his face. "I do have a small bit of gold, but that won't do much on this planet."

"Oh, there's no need to worry mister." Cooking Cat said, shaking her head, voice still with that joyful tone. "Since it's mostly me running the place, I have enough pons to close for a few days and not lose anything if I wanted to! The only real employees I have are my distant cousin from the metro, and a teen from Alpine who comes in on the weekends. And the fromer doesn't show up much." She let out a sigh. "Would be nice to have a few more hands, though."

There was a humm from the toppat chef, before he snapped his fingers, startlingly the toppat who had drifted into the land of his mind. "I got it! I'll need to talk about it with some of the other chefs, but maybe some of us can start working for you."

"What?" Reginald asked, looking over confused. Unless he was planning on sneaking some food back to the clan, how was that going to help.

"Think about it. Even if we do only make a couple pons per shift, that will at least give us a steady source of money we can used to repair the station." Mr. Thicc said, and Reginald was silent for a moment. The answer was so simple, how come he didn't think of it before. "Sure, it may not be the fastest method to get the station fixed, it'll take forever, but it'll be better then nothing!"

"It's... It's perfect!" Reginald said, nearly hopping out of his seat in the joy and relief that willed his being at that very moment. "It's the answer we needed!" He then brought his attention back to the orange cat. "Well... if you're ok with it, that is."

"Well, you'll all have to wake up mighty early in order to get there on time. But I don't see a problem with it!" Cooking Cat said, a smile forming on her face.

"Then it's settled!" Reginald said, clapping his hands slightly. "Mr. Thicc, please go see if any of our other chefs will be interested in working with her?" The man nodded, gray shoes hitting agest the earth as he disappeared. Reginald let out a sigh of relief, leaning against his husband once again.

"Easy Reg, don't want ya passin' out on us." Right Hand Man chuckled, stroking his lover's hair faintly.

"This is probably the most relaxed I've seen Dad." Platinum chuckled, before glancing up at the sky, as everything got the smallest bit darker. "Welp, I should get to my charger. I'll see you all tomorrow." He gave a faint poke in Hat Girl's shoulder as he left, getting a playful glare in return.

"Well, I suppose I should leave." Cooking Cat, standing back up. "It's gonna be a real pain to get back in the dark. Might as well not make it worse."

"Yeah. Well, it was nice seeing you, I suppose." Mu said, giving a slight wave before getting up, getting ready to leave.

"Wait." Reginald called, the two from this planet looking over at him in such confusion. "We... may not have the best condition for guests right now. But please, allow yourselves to stay the night here. It'll be safer for you, and as of right now, it's about the most we can do in return for the kindness you show us tonight."

"Yeah. You two could even sleep in my tent tonight. It normally has enough room for one comfortably but you two should be able to make it work. I can sleep by one of the fires tonight." Hat Girl chimed in. She caught a slight disaproveable of the lack of tent from Reginald's eye, but he didn't say anything.

"Well... I suppose I'll have Mafia Goons outside my place if I return now." Mu sighed, kicking at the ground. "So I suppose I'll take your offer. Although I could also just spend the night in the boat. Would be easier."

"Now, a boat isn't a place for a young girl like yourself to sleep." Cooking Cat said, hoping up and garbing her hand. Hat Girl noticed a faint glare coming from Mu, but made no comment. She was sure she could guess why the glare was there. "Come on, let's find a place to rest." Mu simply nodded, and they disappeared into the dark. The dark of night, lit up with little fires... The dark of space, lit up by night stars...

"Hattie, are you alright?" Reginald asked, placing a hand on her shoulder. She shook her head, breaking out of her thoughts, glancing back at him. "You seemed... sad there for a moment."

"Yeah. I'm fine." She looked at him, giving him a soft smile. "I'm just glad we got things figured out. We'll be back home before we know it." She'll be gone before she knows it.

[lightningbugqueensfics]

A Magical Time of Year

Happy Holidays from we the Supernatural fandom! I present to you a fluffy fic of family, gift exchanges, coming out, and copious amounts of Destiel. Minor angst, because I can't resist, but a happy ending all around.

Destiel, No Archive Warnings Apply, and there are spoilers from the finale.

Thanks so much for the help @themoosegoes-deanicandothis!

Link

“Dean, we have to go,” Cas called out, “Sam just texted me that Claire got here, and we still need to get presents for Jody and Charlie!”

“Alright, let’s just do one last check that we got everything,” Dean said back loudly over the din of the mall. It was December 24, 2020, Christmas Eve, and the pair were finishing up their present shopping.

“Dean Winchester, I have gone over that list five times, we have everything!”

“Humor me?”

“Fine,” Cas grumbled, faking annoyance at his boyfriends antics. Dean really did love Christmas, and was actually enjoying himself in this enormous place. Everything was magical during the Christmas season. There were lights everywhere, everyone seemed happier, and snow made everything unreal. Especially this year, when nothing even resembling an apocalypse was occurring, December was Dean’s favorite month. Even the shopping required by it.

“New hat for Bobby, the blanket with the green creature on it for Charlie,”

“Baby Yoda, Cas!” Dean interrupted, “I showed you the first episode, you know who it is!” Cas smiled to himself. Dean was sure he did that just for his boyfriend’s reaction.

“A silver knife set for Jody,” he continued, “And nunchucks for Claire,” Dean grinned at the last one. It had been his idea, and after extensive convincing, Cas had finally given in and let him buy them. The pros of finally dating.

“We already have the hair products and gun cleaning set at home for Sam, along with Eileen’s new gun, books for Kaia, a new bear for Jack, a pasta maker and hair pins for Donna,” Dean had been particularly proud of Donna’s present. The hair pins could be removed and turned into silver daggers, perfect for hunting, “and that book on mythology and medicine for Alex. And for you a-”

“No, remember Cas, not supposed to tell me,”

“Right. Yours is a secret, but just from you. Are we missing anything, Dean?” he finished sarcastically.

“Nope, we got it all.”

“Good, then let’s get out of here,” Cas grabbed Dean’s elbow as forcefully as an angel could without hurting him, and steered him towards the door.

“Cas, I was thinking maybe we could go grab lunch in the food court before we go?” Dean ventured.

“Dean, I love you very much,” Dean flushed and ducked his head, “but I would rather not spend another second in this godforsaken hellhole.”

Dean conceded, knowing fully well about Castiel’s fear of crowds. It had taken some kissing and pleading to even get him to come today. The hunter nodded his head and threaded his fingers through the angel’s, joining him on their way out.

They left without another word. Dean stayed silent until they got in the car, and let go of Castiel’s hand. He wasn’t quite pouting, per se, but he was very hungry! Halfway home, Cas turned to him.

“We can go get burgers if you’d like…?” A smile broke out on the hunter's face as he jerked the car around. Burgers at the local diner had become the pair’s staple date, so much so that the owner knew then by name.

As they sped off to get their grub, the smile widened on Dean’s face. He reached out and grabbed Castiel’s hand in his own, happy to be exactly where he was.

The enormous metal door clanged open, prompting excited outbursts from Charlie and Donna. The two had taken a surprising liking to each other in the week they had spent together in the bunker, and at this point it was strange to see one without the other.

“Boys!” Donna called out, “Get down here, and tell Jody that the Southern Ocean is totally a thing!”

“The what?” Dean asked jovially. Everything was brighter in the bunker with their family around, the air felt like it was doused in joy.

“The southern ocean,” Jody said, “Donna claims that there’s an ocean around Antarctica called the Southern Ocean, but I know for certain that it didn’t exist when I was in school,” Jody, Donna, Charlie, and Bobby were seated around the war room table. Despite their supposed argument, Donna’s feet were settled comfortably in Jody’s lap, and they were smiling at each other lovingly. Dean would never admit it, but they were a really cute couple.

“I’ve never heard of it,” he supplied as he walked down the stairs, Cas close behind. It earned a “Ha!” from Jody, who pointed at Donna victoriously.

“Jodyo, that doesn’t mean anything! Deano here barely got an education--no offense, sunshine--we should ask a more reliable source!”

“Hey!” Dean called out. He may not have gone to college, but he still went to school. He went unanswered.

“I’ve never heard of it either, and I’ve been around longer than anyone here,” Bobby put in.

“And yet you thought Australia was part of Oceania yesterday,” Charlie said with a cheeky grin. Dean had no clue where all these geography based arguments had come from, but he would be the first to admit they were hilarious.

“Listen here, ya idjit, this ‘Oceania’ didn’t even exist when I was young. Don’t be ageist,”

Charlie scoffed and tried to snark back, but Jody interrupted her.

“Alright, fine,” the sheriff said, “Cas, you’re an angel. Is the Southern Ocean a thing?”

“Yes,”

“See!” Donna exclaimed.

“But,” he continued, “It was only established in the year 2000. So I think you’re both right. Jody didn’t learn about it in school, but it is real,” The women stared at each other, not quite knowing how to react.

“Huh,” Jody said eventually, “Cool, I guess,”

Charlie rose and sidled up beside Cas.

“I tried to tell them that,” she whispered, “Even looked it up on my tablet. But nooooo, they only trust the angel,” she said it all with a smile on her lips, despite the tone of her voice.

After Jack restored everyone and released all his power back into the world, the boys found out he had done them one last favor. Not only had he brought back the Charlie from apocalypse world, he also revived their Charlie, the one killed by Styne. It was awkward at first, but the two actually made fast friends. Apocalypse Charlie had decided to spend this Christmas alone with Stevie, like Patience had with her dad, so it was just the original Charlie hanging with them this year.

“Alright,” Dean said, “As weird and nerdy as this conversation has been, Cas and I have some presents to wrap,” he held up the bags in his hands to prove his point.

“Have fun, boys,” Donna waved them away, and the two headed towards their room.

They stopped in the kitchen along the way, greeting Sam and Eileen who were working on the stuffing, which Dean had assigned to them. He had taken charge of all the cooking this year, working all of their guests to get ready for the feast he had planned. Dean snagged a beer for himself and Cas from the fridge and signed a quick Have fun, Moose Sam’s way before heading out. With Eileen back, the residents of the bunker had all gotten much better at sign language, and Dean was very proud of how far he’d come.

They passed Claire and Kaia watching Home Alone in the Fortress of Deanitude. They stopped by to give them a quick greeting and hugs, but left them to their movie. Claire had said she wanted to educate her girlfriend on the culture she’d missed, but Dean was sure it was just an excuse to cuddle with her. Lord knows he’d done the exact same with Cas.

Jack was wrapping presents in his room, and Dean had to remind him again to keep the door closed while he did.

“But why, Dean?”

“I told you, they’re supposed to be a surprise. That’s why we wrap them, so it kinda defeats the purpose if someone sees what it is before it’s wrapped.”

“Why is it a surprise?”

“Because that’s part of the Christmas spirit. Random things that someone might not even want wrapped in colorful paper stuffed under a dying tree.”

“Okay!” he said with a smile.

Finally, Cas and Dean made it to their room. They had decided on Cas moving into Dean’s room when they got together, considering Castiel spent barely any time in his and Dean’s mattress was better.

They wrapped in silence for a while, before Dean spoke hesitantly.

“I think I’m going to tell them, tomorrow,”

“Tell who what?” Cas turned to him and put down the blanket for Charlie. Dean’s tone was worrying.

“Tell everyone here about us, that we’re dating.”

“Do you want to?”

“Yes.”

“Then why haven’t you told them yet?”

“I’m scared,” Dean and Cas had made a rule the day after they got together. They would be completely honest with each other. Not more lies, tricks, or deception. They were so bad at communication that they pined after each other for twelve years before getting together, and Dean was determined to never let anything like that happen again. Hence the honesty.

“Why?” Cas moved forward, pulling Dean’s hand into his own, “You don’t think they think two men being together is wrong, do you?”

“Nah, of course not. There are more gay couples in our family than straight ones. I’m scared that they won’t want me to be with you because you’re an angel. We’re hunters, babe! Hell, I tried to kill you when I first met you. I know they love you, but what if they don’t think you should be with a human like me?”

“Dean, tell me. What was Sam’s reaction when we told him?” When Dean finally told Sam, a week after Jack brought Cas back and Dean kissed him for the first time, the man’s reaction had essentially been, “finally, you idiots!” It was so much better than Dean’s insecurity had told him that he nearly started crying. Nearly.

“He said we were idiots and was proud of us for finally getting together,” he grumbled.

“And Eileen?”

“She hugged us and gave me a link to something called ‘Archive of Our Own’ that had creepy stuff about us written on it.”

“Jack?”

“He asked if that meant we were really both his dads now,” Dean had actually started crying that time.

“So do you really think the rest of them won’t approve?”

“I know, I know. It’s stupid, but there’s this voice in the back of my head just telling me that they’ll leave me, eventually.”

“It’s not stupid, love, it makes sense. Dean, know that I will never leave you again. And nobody out there will. We love you, we’re your family. Dean Winchester, I promise you that not a single person in this bunker will ever leave you out of choice,”

“Thank you,” the hunter whispered, then leaned forward to kiss his angel softly. Minutes later, after they finally broke apart, Dean made a decision.

“I’m going to tell them. Tomorrow, when we open presents. I love you Cas, and I need people to know that.”

“I’m proud of you, my love,” Cas smiled kindly, cupping Dean’s chin, “Now, let’s finish wrapping these presents, then maybe we can join the girls and watch that movie. I find Marv very funny,” Dean pulled him in for another kiss, then went back to Claire’s nunchucks. He wrapped them in copious amounts of tissue paper, shaping it like a wrapped shirt. Pranks on Claire were his favorites, and tricking her into thinking a weapon was some kind of disappointing Christmas sweater was going to be fun .

The next morning, Jack bounded into their room at six o’ clock sharp. Dean had made the mistake of telling the kid that he couldn’t wake them before six, assuming he would sleep in like every other morning and get them at nine, maybe. Apparently not.

Jack flopped on the bed on Cas’s side that was regularly empty. Not like Dean would ever admit it, but the both of them loved cuddling. It was a rare occasion that Dean woke up without Castiel’s back pressed comfortably to his chest.

Gone were the days when Dean snatched a gun from beneath his pillow if he was startled from sleep. Cas could do that to a man. Today he just grunted tiredly.

“Dean! Cas!” Jack whispered excitedly, “It’s Christmas! Like, actual Christmas, not the one we had with Ms. Butters!”

“Yeah, kid,” Dean grumbled, lifting his head to look over Castiel’s shoulder, “It is. But the sun also hasn’t risen yet, so could you give half an hour?”

“Okay!” Jack said, not fazed, “I’ll go get Jody and Donna!” Dean nodded, brain still addled from sleep. A thought occurred to him.

“Wait, Jack,” he called out, “Be quiet, and only wake up Donna!” Dean had seen Jody in the morning, it wasn’t a good idea to wake her against her will.

Jack nodded, still excited, and rushed out of the room. Dean shoved his face back into Castiel’s neck, breathing in the comforting scent of honey and ozone. He actually wasn’t sure how their guests hadn’t noticed them sleeping together, but they hadn’t mentioned it, so he guessed they just never felt the need to venture to this part of the bunker so late at night.

Exactly thirty minutes later, after Castiel had woken and the two had made no effort to leave their cozy bed, Jack reappeared in their doorway.

“Ready?” he asked, smiling as bright as ever.

“Sure, Jack,” Cas said, very excited for his first Christmas as well, “why don’t you get everyone together in the war room and we’ll meet you out there.”

“Okay!” he said before rushing off again. Dean didn’t know how he had so much energy so early in the morning.

“You ready for this?” Cas asked, giving his boyfriend a peck on the cheek and standing up.

“Yeah,” Dean said, “I actually think I am.”

“Then let’s go,” Cas said determinedly before grabbing Dean’s hand and pulling him up beside him. They headed out the door side by side, clad in scooby doo and bumble bee pajama pants with old band t-shirts on top.

The war room held what Dean thought his heaven must really look like. Sam and Eileen were curled up in one of their brand new armchairs Dean had chosen to sit by the tree, signing at each other with lightning speed. Jody was on the ground with her legs stretched out, Donna’s head in her lap and a cup of coffee in her hands. Claire, Kaia, Alex, and Jack all sat as close to the presents as possible, and Dean didn’t miss Jack trying to peek into a bag with his name on it that Dean had put there last night. It seemed like the girls were trying to explain some of their favorite Christmas traditions to him, but the nephilim just looked lost.

Bobby was seated in the other armchair, and Charlie leaned against its leg. Their family was all here, and it was a beautiful sight.

When Donna caught sight of the pair, a big smile split her face.

“Deano, Angel Boy!” she called out, “Don’t be shy! Come on over here, there’s plenty of room. Maybe Jody’ll even let you put your head in her lap too!” From the look on Jody’s face, Dean didn’t think that was going to happen.

Cas headed in in front of him, and settled himself down right beside Donna. Dean joined Charlie leaning against Bobby’s chair.

“Dean,” Jody grumbled, “that boy of yours woke me up at the asscrack of dawn saying that you told him it was okay.”

“I told him to wake Donna up,” Dean gave a meaningful look at Jack, “because I know she’s an early riser. I specifically told him not to wake you, so I’m wondering why exactly he did?” Dean, Cas, and Jody turned to Jack while he heard something that sounded suspiciously like “Oooooh, someone’s in trouble,” from Claire. Dean shot a glare her way before turning back to Jack.

“I’m sorry, Dean,” he explained, “I was super excited and I really only meant to wake up Donna but I think we talked too loud and woke up Jody too. I’m sorry,” and there were the puppy eyes. Damn kid had learned them from Sam, and who was Dean to resist.

“Alright, Jack, I’m not mad at you,” he gave in, “Just remember to never wake Jody up again. Capeesh?”

“Yes, I capeesh,” Jack nodded, repeating a phrase Cas had obviously taught him. Jody smiled at him kindly, letting him know that she wasn’t still angry at him. No matter how grumpy Jody could be in the morning, she was one of the kindest people Dean knew.

“Not that this hasn’t all been just touching,” Eileen said and signed, “But could we open presents now? I got up this early for a reason, you know.”

“Yeah, yeah, alright,” Dean said, “Go ahead and start handing them out, kid.”

Jack scrambled to grab the first present he could get his hands on, and thus the present exchanging began. Some families did it one at a time, taking a moment for each present. Not the Winchesters and company. They ripped into their gifts at lightning speed, only taking the time to fawn over the present and thank the gifter profusely before moving on.

Kaia loved the books from the brothers and Cas, and squealed when she saw the warding necklace Claire made her, kissing her girlfriend cheerfully. At the same time Donna was thanking Alex for her “#1 Sheriff” mug while Jody protested that she, in fact, was the best sheriff. Their exchange was interrupted by a shriek of “ Nunchucks!!! ” from Claire, which caused Jody to glare at Dean for ten minutes straight. Charlie leapt up and hugged Dean and Bobby when she found a Baby Yoda blanket and working futuristic gun side by side. Bobby loved his new hat as much as Sam loved the beanie Jack got him, and Jody gave Donna a big kiss for her new gun. Alex loved her mythology and medicine book, and Eileen actually got two guns due to miscommunication. She couldn’t have been happier. Cas gave Kaia and Claire an enormous hug to thank them for a new tie, this one stitched with wings and halos. Towards the end, Dean gave Cas a bumblebee beanie and Cas gave Dean socks with pie on them. Dean had to hold himself back from kissing the man on the spot.

Finally, once the present exchange had died down, and everyone was left admiring their new possession, Dean had no more reason to put it off. He had shifted over to sit beside Cas while they all opened their gifts, so he turned to Cas, whispered in his ear what he was going to do, then took a deep breath.

He started to stand up, felt awkward, then sat back down. He cleared his throat, scratched the back of his neck, and couldn’t for the life of him start talking.

“Spit it out, Dean,” Bobby grumbled.

“Heh?” he asked.

“You’ve been shifting around for five minutes like you’ve either gotta pee or you need to say something. I’m betting on the latter, so don’t keep me waiting.”

“Oh, um,” Dean started, his stomach in knots, “Well I do actually have something I need to tell you. All of you. Except for Sam, Eileen, and Jack. They already know, see… And now I need to tell the rest of you because it’s very important but know that I think about it I’d rather not--”

“Dean,” Jody said gently, “You can tell us anything. I promise.”

“Ok, well, um… ok. So, you remember the whole Chuck infinity snap everyone dies thing?”

“Vividly,” Donna said.

“Well we lost Cas right then too. Not for the same reason, that’s a story for another day. Anyway, we lost him, It was…” he started to get choked up. Head in the game, Winchester , he thought, “It was horrible but Jack brought him back and after that the two of us kinda started… dating? Like, we’re together now,” he finished with a grimace, disappointed with his… well, talking skills. Cas grabbed his hand comfortingly, and smiled at him with eyes that said I’m proud of you .

“Uh, Dean,” Claire said, breaking the silence, “We know.”

“Huh?”

“Honey,” Donna cut in, “You two aren’t exactly subtle. To be honest, I thought you two lovebirds were together from the moment I saw you together, and Jody had to convince me you weren’t. Recently though, it’s kinda obvious, sweetheart. You’re both so much happier. You still do the staring thing, but it’s less intense. Castiel’s ASL name for you is literally ‘freckles.’ And you really think we didn’t notice you sleeping in the same room? We thought you knew that we knew.”

“You… knew?” Dean asked, shocked. Donna nodded, “And you’re like, okay with it and stuff?”

“Dean, why wouldn’t we be. I’m dating Jody, Claire’s dating Kaia, why the hell do you think we wouldn’t approve?”

“No, no, not that. It’s just, Cas is an angel. Literally and figuratively. I thought you might not like that we’re not the same… species?” By now Cas’ arm was wrapped around Dean, and he had slouched into his side.

“Well, you were obviously wrong, weren't cha? None of us could ever think Cas is a monster, and you two obviously belong together,” Donna said kindly.

“I'm proud of you, boy,” Bobby added, making Dean duck his head and grin.

“Thanks Donna, Bobby,” he said, “I’m sorry I doubted you. And were we really that obvious?”

“Yes, Dean,” Cas said in his gravelly voice, “I’m fairly certain we were. I thought they knew already at first, but as you are more well versed in human interaction, I trusted your judgement over my own,” at this, Claire cracked up, quickly joined by Alex and Sam.

“Not that this hasn’t been the most awkward conversation ever--except a certain dinner--” Dean and Sam shuddered at the memory, “but I would really appreciate some breakfast. And I was promised pie?” Claire said with a smile, cutting the tension in the room with ease.

Hours later, after breakfast and pie had been eaten, and Jody had already taken away Claire’s nunchucks until further notice, Dean and Cas were left alone in the war room.

“That went a very different route than I expected,” he said quietly, wrapping his arms around the angel’s waist and leading him towards their room.

“That seems to happen often in our lives, Dean,” Cas replied.

“Is it a good thing?”

“Right now, I think it is.”

Dean stopped Castiel in the doorway of the hall, and looked up at the plant hanging above their heads.

“Mistletoe,” he said, then drew his angel in for a kiss.

Christmas truly was a magical time of year.

[bisluthq]

deciding people are ‘too old’ for trends - which lbr only ever ends up applying to women, men are allowed to keep their hobbies, sense of humor, and sense of style the same as when they’re basically 12 - ain’t it. like it’s fine to not be into it, but adults having fun isn’t inherently cringy somehow. the kids harassing her notes are way more cringy than kk.

Fair, maybe I’m being ageist and a bit sexist but tbf if Josh made a TikTok account of any sort I would mock the shit out of him. (Can we just remember MEME for a hot second 😭😂😂😂😭) But it could be me having internalized ageism and in the case of Klossy internalized misogyny idk.

The people harassing her do need to stop. I agree and keep saying this and again if anyone sees a mate in the comments of her shit call their dumb ass out.