#again alot of stuff was done wrong and there would be tons i would have changed but at their very core the alters were right

[steve-brules-rules]

it is

day 9

of

bweirdOCtober

So Ryan's first relationship was with Dyvim Whitehart. They were really really into each other when they met, and ofc they saved Khrysalis together ! Ryan was about 22/23, and they felt like this was it, they'd found their forever partner. They'd fallen fast and hard, but it just felt right. And things really were great!! They both preferred to take action and help others instead of sitting back, Dyvim is really gentlemanly, they were the only two who really understood eachother when it came to what theyd experienced with morganthe, each one trusted the other with their life, i mean they really had somethin!

annnnd, then they didn't

The first nail in the coffin was Dyvim's desire to stay in Khrysalis. He felt a sense of duty to help rebuild, and for all the traveling he did, he still missed his homeland whenever he was away. Ryan, on the other hand, gets depressed if they have to stay in one place for a long time. They don't have that sense of home, being basically an alien n all that,,

The second nail was that were both relatively young. Ryan is kinda hot-headed and impulsive, but it was wayyy worse when they were younger. And Dyvim was only a little older. They argued about where they wanted to live. Alot. And being younger meant they didnt really know their priorities or boundaries too well yet. So they wanted to sacrifice too much for this relationship that didn't fulfill their emotional needs. They both said and did alot of stuff that was really hurtful, and they both hurt eachother on purpose sometimes. And if one of them did something by accident, the other refused to forgive. Even tho it was a legit accident. So that would build more resentment and start the cycle again.

The third nail was just the inability to communicate. There was so little communication. One wouldn't understand what they had done wrong, and the other would just refuse to ever talk about it. That also built tonnnns of resentment at lightspeed

The breakup was REALLY bad. They'd gotten pretty codependent while trying to hang onto this very bad relationship, so that made everything wayyy harder. Eventually, one day, Dyvim was just gone. Ryan pretty much got the hint at that point, but it was still really hard. They had a ton of trauma to work through, and even when theyd gotten thru alot of it, they still felt hollow and misanthropic and bitter.

--------------

So, some years go by, and Ryan is starting to feel better. They still get angry thinking about all that happened, but they atleast feel better.

Then they meet this REALLY weird guy. He looks just like The Old One, with bizarre tentacles on his face, an unsettling stare, and a silly top hat, but he doesn't act like The Old One. Instead of being articulate and manipulative, he's now dazed. Like he just woke up. Half his words he stumbles over, and he spends so much time agonizing over the other half, wondering if he's saying what he means. He calls himself Nothing. Ryan can't tell if he's telling the weirdest and least funny joke, or if The Old One is just trying to manipulate them for some reason.

Eventually, he starts calling himself Dasein. Ryan can't understand why. It's barely a real word. But there's kind of a charm to him, in his own strange way. He seems genuine. Maybe he was telling the truth about those cavities.

He becomes ashamed of the form he's taken. Ryan can't explain it, but they kind of miss seeing that slightly bewildered-looking stare from his inky black eyes. The way he's always just below a shout when he speaks. But most of all, Ryan is touched by how hard this Dasein guy is trying to learn. It really does seem like he's just now learning the ways of the spiral. And he really looks up to Ryan. They didn't feel worthy of anyone looking up to them. And if they were being honest... they looked up to him. He was determined to do the right thing no matter what, and he had faith in others. Ryan hadn't realized how cynical and detached they'd become until then.

At some point, Ryan feels bad for him not really having any place to go. They know that feeling. So they let him hang out in their arcanum apartment whenever he feels like it. He spends alot of downtime reading and practicing speaking with Ryan. He really doesn't need the practice anymore. He was using impressive language from all the reading, but talking to Ryan helps him feel more confident. And Ryan likes talking to him... alot. Sometimes they talk about history, and sometimes they get to know eachother. They bond over the fact they're both from beyond the spiral, that much of spiral culture seems weird, and they laugh together.

The tentacles aren't offputting anymore. His skin is actually cool and soft, not clammy like they'd expected. They learn all of that when Dasein excitedly tells them to touch his hand and feel his skin for themselves. When Ryan does, they look up and catch his gaze. He's smiling enthusiastically, like a kid who's just remembered the candy in their pocket. Something in Ryan's heart reawakens, and they can't get him off their mind after that. Every time they think about him, they get a fluttering in their stomach.

When he disappears into the world synthesizer, Ryan doesn't know how they could keep going. They want to stop everything and wait for him to come back. Eventually, Malwurf forcibly takes the synthesizer from Ryan. Ryan knows he was right to do so. They had basically been keeping a live bomb tucked under Dasein's favorite blanket. If it went off for whatever reason, they wouldve all be killed.

When Ryan goes to explore the newly created world and they hear his voice again, they almost can't be dragged away. When they hear him again later on, alone and afraid and calling out for them, everything else becomes a second priority. And when he retreats away in fear and pain, they follow him to the actual ends of the spiral to help him.

It isn't until they're both home, together and safe, that they finally admit to eachother how they feel. And Ryan's life is forever changed by that moment.

[lyss-sketchbox]

OKAY BUT unless I'm understanding it wrong- The FIRST Pyro Archon was human. They said that. That the Pyro Archon has always been a human and there's been like a ton of them. Natlan never had any gods to claim the divine throne in the first place. Which is SO incredibly suspicious sounding and if that's never elaborated upon/refuted boy I'm going to RIOT-

But yea on Ei I kinda fantasized about an alternate Act I for Ei's SQ where she asks to spar again because mmm battle as her way of communicating sounds very on brand for her. Because I feel like that's what should shake her faith. LITERALLY I love characters that are defined by their life as a glorified weapon (stares at my love for childe) it's just squandered on Ei for some reason.

If they're going to use Ei for goofy things they could at least take my idea and have her lose to Itto in beetle fight in public in front of all of Ei's followers/worshippers (/j) (/srs) (it would be hilarious)

But yeah no you're right about all of that stuff being kinda whack. The execution of Natlan feels all wrong. Like!! The pieces are there!! It could work!! They're just treating everything so flippantly that it's just. Eh. Okay. What's the point of anything then- Like I never felt like Natlan had to be a wartorn battlefield of a nation, I just want them to actually act like any of this actually matters! Bc atm it doesn't feel that way at all

Yeah ngl the issue is just you literally dont feel amy stakes with natlan at all. I literally feel like a tourist that got roped into a find a mcguffin or the world ends adventure.

About Mavuika

Fr i dont even know what is up with Natlans archon. Its all so convoluted but mavuika is featured in that one archons official art so she is... the 'correct' archon in some way?????

She IS human, we see she has a picture of her family, but it is from the past. She was elected the archon in the past. Died. And now she has been resurrected to take the role again. Why her? Shes just human. Why did she get resurrected again if the nations archon switches constantly? Like what is the point of constantly changing archons if one can just be... resurrected to take the title again.

I have a feeling, based on leaks and the natlan trailer, that the 'archon' of natlan isnt a real archon. Not a real godly being with a hold of the divine throne. I have a feeling that there is a seperate being that is the true pyro archon, can be an actual archon or maybe the wayob, who set up this human archon system. Like mavuika, the human archon, is not the highest power here and something else is in charge. Can be the pyro sovereign who knows that would be cool, it was mentioned that the pyro sovereign ruled ancient natlan before the archons.

About Ei

I remember the one part in Ei's SQ where we went to confront a corrupted group of shogunate officials and these two people were fighting. And Ei simply suggests that the head of the clan in the past has proven their worthiness by combat and therefore if one wishes to be head of the clan, they can challenge her and proof to her they are worthy. And the guy we were rooting for, while he had no advanced skills, stood up, tried to fight her, and lost.

I LIKE THAT ALOT!!! That is Ei's way of settling conflict! It is backed up by how it was done in the past! And she clearly knew noone was winning and only fought with the blunt end of her spear. She knew! And she only suggested this to show who really had the will and the resolve to hold that title. I LIKE THAT!!! ME LIKEY THAT WAS REALLY GOOD!!!!

[pugsarecool]

it's december now, time to reflect (:

turning 23 this yr was like a shock to my system almost. this year consisted of a ton of growth & reflection.

21-22 yr old me vs 23 yr old me are vastly different kind of.

i'm no longer interested in most of the stuff i would constantly chase after or would indulge in alot. for instance, i've stopped giving people or situations my attention, energy, reaction, etc. because i just genuinely don't see the point in a lot of things, so i shrug it off and pretend like as if it never happened.

i've stopped drinking / smoking as much, i never enjoyed either one of those activities; but felt like i had to bc i would be the odd one out. but i've had many nights so far of going out with friends and not feeling the need to partake in that, i can have fun w/o it lol.

i haven't been engaging in meaningless relations w anyone so far. sure i've had my few hookups this year but it was mostly for all the wrong reasons. whether it was bc i wanted the ego boost of knowing i could get w a hot girl or because i just wanted the temporary companionship from a girl even if it was just for one night. the temptation is still there bc i'm still in college and its not hard to get sex even from girls, but i think about it before even entertaining the idea. i think to myself if it'll even be worth it after its all said and done; usually no. so i've just been keeping myself away from all of that and just enjoying my solitude as i normally do bc i know that if i go back to that phase of life where i was just hooking up w girls constantly and then dealing w the repercussions of it all, i won't know how to get out of that bc i genuinely lost myself in all of that and i don't want to lose myself again.

+ i haven't been genuinely interested in anyone either, i've just been so used to trying to better myself and prioritize myself so much that i just don't have the energy to care for dating, relationships, etc. there are times where i crave romance and intimacy with someone, but that's usually at 3am when i can't sleep and overthinking lol, once i wake up in the morning i just dont care. i've had two-ish talking stages this year, and i ruined both of them bc i refuse to prioritize anyone but myself lately. i just physically cannot commit to anything but me. the idea of a relationship sounds nice, but i'm just not willing to put in the time or effort

my career interests have constantly changed, and i was able to finally rationalize and be honest with myself as to where i want to be in life and where my ambitions are best put to use. i was working in tech this summer in seattle, it was great but i knew i had higher ambitions for myself. i was constantly debating whether to work in tech or finance, and i narrowed it down to finance and was thankfully able to land a banking job. my plan is to work in california for about two years to be able to build my professional network even further, save up $$$ and eventually live in nyc for a bit before coming back to california to hopefully settle down lol.

i started to appreciate my family and loved ones a whole lot more. i cherish every single one of them. i even visited my parents' home country and got to meet one of my grandmas for the very first time. as well as, being exposed to a very different part of the world that made me realize how much of a sheltered / comfortable life i live. i was crying a bit when the plane took off from El Salvador back home bc i felt like i was leaving behind family members and how i wished i could take them out of their current living situations that made my heart heavy. all it took was that one trip for me to get a grip on myself and realize how blessed i truly am and to always appreciate the moments i have with my family members.

[imperiuswrecked]

You could literally just block her but you rather keep coming back to harass her. I already knew esteicy is aggressive as shit for no reason but I always thought you were more level-headed than this. I've lost a ton of respect for you today.

Good. Lose my blog then. Esteicy is my friend and you don't know her. I have blocked Ham, I blocked her over a year ago, I accidentally followed her when she made a new blog and I thought she was a new Namor fan and I was interested in seeing what they would post. The instant she updated her info and someone pointed out to me who she was bc I'm not on tumblr 24/7, I blocked right away without talking to her.

I only unblocked to point out she was wrong and as a fan of this character and the fact she based alot of her post on stuff I have used in the past I felt I had to address it. Once I addressed it I blocked her again. She called me an Anti and a liar and said our convo wasn't finished, I unblocked her to address that, because she doesn't *know* me and I certainly will not let a person who has been a jerk to my friends believe she had the moral high ground bc she is playing into her victim hood. And yes I have seen the things she posted after my last post but at this point I've already said I was done replying to her. I'm not here to comfort people who says anyone who calls them out on their racism are Antis/bullies.

It's really funny that fans of color are aggressive but white fans aren't when the subject of addressing shitty fandom racism comes up.

[silent-dragon]

For the "Ship Me With ____" Post! I like these kinda things and I'm here to join! Let me know if I did this wrong! -ᄒᴥᄒ- (I can't access your OC's list so I'm going on vague descriptions or just their image in your pinned...)

I think Neir would look kind of cute with Cater. He has an Idia Shroud vibe that sort of rubs off like sibling/family tree vibes, so a sunshine individual (who also has their own hidden secrets) would match. Like: "Someone will die..." "Of fun! ... And this knife we brought."

Joy and Riddle are kind of obvious, since it looks like it can be a joyous yet almost fickle relationship; in a good way! Like, the MC watched them grow closer like canonical Trey and Riddle did after having a wedge in their relationship (Riddle's past and Trey's guilt). What I know of the rabbit is that he follows the rules and does venture too far exploring, but he's always on time in the end. Maybe?

Also, Trey and Joy is a no-brainer (I love Trey, I'm biased)!

【I don't know your OC's well so I'll stop here but I want to read all of their bios! ✨】

Thank you so much for this i enjoyed reading it alot.

Neir

The vibe you got from Neir is spot on cause if you see her full design its clear she had Shroud family ties. Originally she was Idia & Othro's mother but i made her when I didn't know if parent ocs of canon characters were ok or not. I determined it wasnt so I changed her story to being the Astrology professor everyone hates the class of and fairy like Tinkerbell who followed Crowley around all these years. Also she is genderless so pronouns don't matter to her but most see Neir as a woman usually students the staff is mixed. I use she since habit from when she was parent oc.

(In her design she has the triangles like seen on Idia's stuff,etc. I decided to keep em on her after restory as she just got her fashion from his homeland.)

Cater is one who enjoys her class so she already does favor him over most since her class is so disliked. Neir doesnt understand the concept of romantic love but rather motherly love. If she finally decides she tired of Crowley and follow a new boy it highly likely would be Cater. Their dynamic would be as you said since Neir is more moonlight & repressed alot.

Joy

Joy with Riddle is super fitting. Joy actually is twist of the rabbit's watch not the rabbit himself which i know sounds weird. Joy just a time nerd so super organized and has everything down to a schedule planned. Riddle would adore this im sure that everything goes according to plans he has made and on time. Unplanned stuff and time wasters do cause Joy issues and eventually ppl would tell him relax with his schedules and time management but he can learn to add such things as more fun in as Riddle learns to aswell together.

Ive actually never thought of Joy & Trey. Would they work out? They do have similar brotherly thing as Joy has tons of siblings. I feel Joy may work with him but might find toothbrushing to be a time waste if done for over 5mins and that may make em have a moment lol.

Ty again for this i am working on tags for my ocs so easier to find all their stuff ive posted. Also for interacting with me despite the ban on my blog felt like no one wants to chat cause of it.

[tempoaryblogformightyjensblog]

After a Longass time, I'm gonna make a response post to a post from @itsclydebitches. Not sure if I'll acknowledge All

Of it, but still..

1.Thats, the opposite of what the First episode shows, the first episode shows that the Military presence in Mantle dosent really do anything to actually help them with the Grimm. With it even being joked about as usual for the Military by Nora. The next episode also states that wasn't even the reason James had for it. It was to handle the 'eventual' Panick.

2.This and the recurring point of this later on is something I kinda want to address, because it's sort of what I was trying to say in My ask but I should go into more detail.

The point is basically that If James was shady for what he did, then So is Ruby for being willing to work with him for that long...I kinda want to mix this with a different Criticism I heard. That Ruby not trusting Ironwood was horrible and ungrateful because of all the good stuff James had done and how sympathetic and well meaning he was. The issue is that they are both 2 halves of the picture that ignore the other half, wich was what the heroes actual response was.

Him being sympathetic, clearly just trying to help and all the Good stuff he was doing is why they are willing to work with him and help with things. But Ruby didn't like his shadier actions either, wich is why she didn't trust him completely. And also? ""Nora dosent agree...But Ruby, the leader, does. She pushed Ironwood to finish Amity somwhow", that....isnt What happens, we see After Nora yells at James, ruby walks up to him and tells him more calmly that his actions, his management of Mantle and such were only helping Salem and it's what was making it easy for Salem to frame him. And earlier on we saw her with the other protags suggest working with Robyn. That's not 'Reaping the benefits of his actions even if they don't like them', that's not liking some of his actions but still trying to Understand him, and hope to reason or talk him down. Basically...Well it's a display that the other charachterization for Ruby, that she was a judgmental child who considered anyone who went beyond her standard of perfection to be Evil, isn't true. She tries to help and Understand James because she knows despite his flaws he is trying to do good, she tries to reach out to him and get him to see his actions were flawed.

Hell, the Jobs they were actually given were jobs where they could actually help soften the consequences of James actions, like Ren and Nora guarding the wall. the Robyn thing was a direct display that they weren't just doing anything James asked or were perfectly fine with his morally ambiguous actions. When ordered to attack a Huntress who was just trying to help, they instead went against his orders and even tried to actually fix things in a better way.

3.This is a few different issues, I'll start by saying that, that wasn't Ozpins problem in the Previous Volume, Some fans and some of the Heroes in there Angrier times think that, But the big thing was basically that Ozpin wasn't trusting anyone With that Info, that's what separates it from Rubies situation with James, Ruby wasn't trusting James because he actually did have many traits that made him look untrustworthy. And...well Finishing Amity and the plan is not pointless even with Salems immorality. Ruby dosent 'Know' That her being immortal means that the whole plan is pointless for 2 reasons, 1 is that she never had the mindset that it made it all pointless, she was actually distinctly against that when the others thought that under the Apathies influence, and makes her stance clear later, that Salem being Unkillable doesn't mean she's unstoppable. And 2, she dosent 'Know' that because....Its not true. Even if they can't directly kill her like James is planning...Were explicitly, directly told in Salems first actual appearance in the show that Humanity United was a threat and that was why she was going to ensure she divided them. Not to mention that...It isn't even all about the plan? It's made clear that global communications being down was a really bad thing and fixing that alone would help.

4.Im just gonna address one point here...It was not 'The Majority of Mantle' Being taken, were told that they were not even close to being done evacuating.

5.Basically what I said at 2, But to also state, James wasn't an Unambiguous Bad guy in Volume 7, He was in the Wrong In Volume 7, but he wasn't meant to be a Villain yet. The point of James charachter is basically he's someone who meant well but was highly flawed and made bad decisions, and instead of growing from his mistakes, he doubled down on them and let his flaws consume him. I'll get to it more later, but, that doesn't mean he was always evil or meant to be, Also...Jaunes license was given to him by James but, he was not part of the Military being fused with Huntsman, especially by this point. And with Winters words in her and James fight, I have my own issues with that fight or Winters Arc, but I don't think that point holds up either because we weren't meant to see Winter as unambiguously a good guy in Volume 7. Her words in there fight was after she had changed, that dosent mean we're supposed to believe she was a hero while working under James. It just means her POV changed after leaving him, now she wasn't following her programming of being blindly obedient anymore. Penny called out Winter for her being willing to follow through with euthanizing the Winter Maiden, Marrow calls her out in Volume 8 asking the Weiss question.

6.Well, to answer the questions there, were told in episode 5 what the recources were. Clover says how they were taking 'Construction resources', were told this again by Penny in the Car ride, wich makes total sense. They are changing Amity so that it could serve as a shuttle, so needing Construction stuff makes sense. While we may not be told how much power James had explicitly, they do give us a decent idea, that he had way more then he should. It's said in the Council meeting that they set in Checks and balances to keep him from overstepping with his seats, and that he basically just Ignored them to pull the actions he did in Volume 7. And Watts gives us both one Major decision that shows James flaws and gives a Clue as to part of the reasons Mantle was crappy as it was, saying how James updated most of the code in Atlas after the fall of Beacon, but 'As Usual' None was updated in Mantle. Aside from showing a...Truly Spectacularly callous move on James part, it also gives a big clue as to part of the reason Mantle is as crappy as it is, That Atlas and James basically treat Mantle like an afterthought and neglects changing things there to make things better, resulting in the City's state that we see. And, I imagine that being surveillanced and patrolled almost constantly wouldn't be ideal, and it's established by Winters line in that first episode that not cooperating with Personal was a punishable offense. I think you also....Picked a really bad example with Rhodes, if anything, Rhodes is probably a perfect demonstration of why being complacent or loyal to a system is bad for Huntsmen. I think if he would have loved to help Cinder more, it's just that he was loyal to the System and wasn't doing anything to upset the status quo despite knowing it was wrong. If issues like that existed, then it makes James specialist program, wich is specifically supposed to be Huntsmen trained to be loyal to the system, an even worse idea. Also I sort of feel like the bits at the end are sort of a false equivalency. I explained Ozpin amd Rhodes but also...Well for one, while we don't see portals line up in those specific areas, the plan was to have Jaune explain what was going on with everyone. And Qrow, Marrow and Robyn were still taking in the other Ace ops,they knew the plan so they would likely just head over to the nearest portal after, and...Maria and Pietro weren't there. And in James case, it wasn't just him 'saving who he could', it's that he could have tried to do more but didn't because he didn't want to risk it, and as Volume 8 showed, they really did have lots of time to evacuate people and could have found a way to Launch Amity. And...Well in his case there's the little fact that, as his Convo with Oscar makes explicit, James plan involved leaving the rest of Mankind To the dust and at Salems mercy.

There are problems with RWBY, but I don't think it's shoddily written, partially because I don't really find it 'particularly' flawed and think the good far outweighs the bad. And you know what? To some degree, I agree. I do think there's a weird bias towards authority in the FNDM, but maybe alot of fans are too dismissive of criticism, I do think to some degree we should acknowledge the RWDE and such aren't all right wingers and there's now a Vocal part of it that are on the left or members of minority groups. I don't agree with a ton of the things they say, and think most of it dosent hold up, but instead of just dismissing, perhaps it's better to look at things in detail and give proper arguments agaisnt them. So I won't treat you like an idiot, I'm going to give a full rundown on why I don't feel like it holds up under analytical scrutiny.

For one, while it doesn't have those specific issues like in the real world, I don't agree with this Criticism because I feel it is the one that sort of ignores the worldbuilding and what's been shown or said about the Military and the world itself and not the show, It sort of feels like people just bring up the basic concepts that would seem reasonable and ignore how the show executes certain things. For one, the military was a leftover from a time when they were meant to fight against other humans, It was something an Authoritarian state held over after its defeat and reformation, James and the Military helped Jac as he turned the SDC into the horrific corporate empire it is, Covordin shows that Nationalism is indeed a bit thing and that there were high ranking officers who were fully comfortable with the possiblity of just waging war on the other Kingdoms again. And then there's the specialist program, I've seen people sort of distill it to its very basics to make it seem more reasonable, describing it as just stuff like Huntsmen having rules and such, when the show displays it being way more screwed up then that. It literally involves indoctrinating people as students, were shown Elm reprimand the protagonists saying how they don't need to think about Orders just follow them. As both Volumes show, the culture of the program is deeply screwed up and unhealthy for them, were shown how they taught stuff like repressing your emotions and how deeply unhealthy it is for them.

And...Furthermore? If we're judging by how things are In Universe with the show the world built...James way of doing things is, completely absurd. I already dislike Cynical 'This is the REAL world 'Types IRL. But....In the world James is in, his strategy is just....

He lives in a world where negativity causes monster attacks and the villains whole Shtick is manipulating narratives to cause disarray and ensuring people stay divided. James strategy involved closing off Atlas from the rest of Remnant after they were framed for causing the Fall of Beacon, never bothering to clear there name when sleet and Camilla say he could easily do so, he dismisses both his image across the Globe and in Atlas, and dismisses what the people of Mantle want and the stuff his actions currently cause, all as Neccesary sacrifices when that's all completely insane and Relies on basically ignoring absolutely everything about the situation they are in and how there enemy works, wich again, Ruby points out, that he was actively playing into Salems hands and making it easier for her.

I think it's a decent display of the Tunnel Vision James has, he's prepared for the negativity of the END result of his plan and made preparations for it, but he...Basically ignores the consequences his actions are having right now and how that will affect his ends.

Overall...I think the issue is that James is not meant to be the Bad guy through Volume 7, and I feel like its not that the show 'contradicts' it's pure black and white take on things, it's just that it wasn't there to begin with. Whenever a Major flaw Ironwood had from the start is brought up, it's claimed that it means he was supposed to be 'Always evil'(admitedly some fans as well), when it dosent, it just means his flaws and darker aspects were always there and he didn't jump off the slippery slope instantly like some claim.

Were meant to sympathize with James, understand him, ECT. We're meant to want to see him get better, to be escatic when he does almost get better.

Overall, I don't agree with the idea that James was a reasonable charachter who was bastardized, the show set him up as flawed pretty well already, he's sympathetic because he's designed to be sympathetic. He's not potrayed as a Villain through 7 because he wasn't meant to be til the end.

Also...Well, even if you still felt that him 'Just' abandoning Mantle was still just morally gray...That isn't dropped in V8, it's bascially dropped not 2 episodes later. Where not only does he shoot Oscar but Oscar pointed out not only was he abandoning Mantle, but abandoning the rest of Mankind. Wich James just responds calling it an 'excellant philosophical point'.

[happys-crazy-queen22]

Title: The Perks Of Santo Padre II

Gif credits to @angels-reyes & @nerd4music

Requested on wattpad

Hope you all enjoy

Happy reading dollies

Tag list @ilovetaquitosmmmm. @twistnet. @nocturnalherb16. @jesseswartzwelder. @leaalfred. @mayans-mc. @baylishh. @ifoundmyhappythought

Don't you have some where to be, Oceteva"? Angel growls as he sees Nestor holding your hand when he came up to the table.

"No, I'm free". Nestor smirked as he sat down beside you.

"Well, you're not welcomed here. So you need to get the fuck out". Angel sat down in the other seat beside you.

"The only way I'm leaving is with Y/N, back to my place". The club around him laughed and whistled. Angel wasn't so happy about that, as he balled up his fist.

You chuckled under your breath, shaking your head. You couldn't believe that two guys liked you. You, of all people they could be with and they were fighting over you. Mind blowing.

"So, Y/N. What do you do for fun"? Nestor asked, his hand lingering on your thigh. Angel's hand on your other thigh.

"I watch movies and hang with friends. I like to paint and see the countryside. Listen to music and dance horribly". You giggled cover your mouth with your hand.

"I bet you dance wonderful". Nestor spoke with such a maturity to him that Angel didn't really have.

"Why you do that"? Angel interrupted yours and Nestors moment.

You were taken back by Angel's question, figuring you did something wrong. "I'm sorry". You lowered your head.

"Why do you cover up that beautiful smile of yours". He spoke sweetly and moved your hand from your mouth. A smile crept across it as your cheeks blushed.

"I dont like my smile".

"It's beautiful. Just like you. Dont hide it. Especially from me". You nodded your head.

"What time is it"? You asked everyone looking at their phones.

"Almost midnight. Why"? Angel said.

"I have to get home. Thanks for the drink and the company but I must get going. Hank will you take me home, please"?

"Yeah". He got up from his seat.

"I can take you home if you'd like"? Angel said before Nestor.

"Thanks but Hank brought me and I'll be leaving with him". You say walking with Hank to the door. Turning around and waving to the two men sitting on the couch.

A few days later, you were coming out to your car when you noticed two dozen roses and a gift bag sitting on the table on the porch.

You chuckled and shook your head. These guys were seriously going to war trying to win your heart.

"To Y/N, I hope you have a lovely day. Love Angel". You read the card of the flowers.

Opening the gift bag, you found a box with a sapphire necklace with a card that read. "Thinking of you. I hope you had a good night. I know I did. I cant wait to see you again. Sincerely Nestor". The necklace was beautiful but way to expensive. Both cost alot of money. You didn't want men spending that much on you.

Grabbing the flowers and bag you headed to your car for work. Your friends will have field day when they see this.

"Girl. Marry the one with the necklace. He has money". She squealed as with laughter.

"No". You simply told her.

"No, date the guy that sent you flowers. Its sweet and doesnt go overboard. And doesn't make him seem like hes trying to hard for attention". Your other friend said.

"I dont know what to do. They're both great guys and they're really cute. Nestor seems so mysterious and grown up. Angel is funny but kind of a child too".

"What's wrong with a man having a little child in him"? You and your other friend looked at each other and laughed.

"You know what I mean, damn. It means he knows how to have fun and make you laugh. Not be so uptight and rules rules rules all the time. Live alittle".

"You're right. I guess I just have to get to know them better". You huffed as you saw the stack of paper work in front of you. "We should get to work. We have tons of stuff to get to before tonight". They all agreed and headed to work. The whole day Angel and Nestor were on your mind. Maybe it was like that saying you talk about them and they appear.

"Cutey at table five". Your friend said as you turned around. There sat Angel with some of the guys you met the other night at your table.

"Hey guys, what are you doing here"? You asked oddly.

"We came here for the big event". Angel said looking you up and down.

"I didn't know you were on the VIP list".

"I got people in high places". Angel sent you a wink.

"Right, the waiter should be here to take your drink order. I have to get back to work". Angel grabbed your hand before you left.

"Did you like the flowers"?

"They're beautiful. Thank you". You sweetly smiled and walked off.

Letting out a puff of air you were holding in. You walked by another table and got a glimpse of those tight braids. Nestor was here as well.

"Nestor, what are you doing here"?

"I'm on the list. My boss gave me a bonus and this was the place to be".

"Oh alright. Well it was nice seeing you again. I have to get back to work".

Nestor took your hand in his. "Enjoy the necklace"?

"Its beautiful. Thanks but way to expensive. I cant keep it. After I'm done here I want you to take it. Get your money back".

"I dont want it back. I want to see it around your neck. You can wear it on our date".

You heard the scoff behind you. It was Angel with his arms crossed over his chest.

"What the hell are you doing here? I didnt know they let trash in the place". Nestor chuckled under his breath as he saw it was Angel.

"Well they let little bitches in like you so they must be letting everyone in".

They both growled at each other. If you weren't in the middle of them they would have thrown punches at each other.

"Guys, stop. Not here. They'll call the cops on you".

They both laughed. "We own the cops, sweetheart". Angel grinned.

"Fine. Kill each other. I dont care. But I'm not sticking around to find out who won. Grow up both of you". You spat and walked off.

"You stand no chance with her". Nestor shoved Angel.

"I saw her first. It's my club so I have dibs". Angel shoved Nestor into the table. Glass being tossed to the floor.

They started punching and hitting on each other. Angel was throw on a table. Nestor was kicked into a group of people standing nearby.

Security tried breaking them up pulling them apart. You came running up.

"You idiot's. I never want to see you two ever again. Get them out of here". You yelled. The guards dragging them out.

You turned around about to go back to work, you saw your boss waiting for you. With a disappointing look on his face. You knew you were fired and it was all because of Angel and Nestor being children.

[gottalovelifeya]

So I've read that twice now, and I'm still trying to figure it out, and something I can't figure out is, is there even a chance at all or am I still just being my optimistic self, I think I need to start trying to abandon that idea, becuse as it stands I'm not going to loose my retirement or go to jail becuse than, there's no future with her or just at all period, I'm just trying to not give the impression that I don't want her or I life's great now, but I mean it's literally all on her at this point, and I don't know what all she has going on and honestly for once I don't want to know, but I need a hug, and honestly even if I'm not emotionaly ready for anything serious, I just need someone in my life, like honestly it dosnt even have to be anything serious, just someone to cuddle up on the couch and watch movies, go out to dinner or cook for eachother, go out on little dates, and just have a good with them really. You see my whole thing with it thow, is it wrong to try and seek out or have that with someone, even if there fully aware that you need a shit ton of time to actually build love with them, becuse I've only ever bene aww struck once, and ive bene married once but that was rushed, and there wasn't a foundation to our marriage at all. And I mean after as long as we were together there was love, but it wasn't the kind that is like litterly the for better or worse, no matter what happens will be by each others sides, and a couple months ago she literally just bounced on me because she was done being an adult because we lost 2 houses over the course of a year, first becuse covid(not being able to get a job) and we lost all our worlds possession and I had to put down our 3 cats because 2 of them were disabled, and we couldn't live with the idea of just abandoning them on the side of the road, and just wondering and being worried about there safety and well being.

Then we moved back here so that I could complete all the steps to receive my retirement, and living with my parents was really hard and put alot of strain on our Marriage, becuse she dispised my parents because they wouldnt let us bring our cats here, becuse they have dogs, and so she still blames them for the cats deaths.

And than after 2 months of living with the fam I started reviveing 50% of my benefits and started receiving my GI bill school stypen, so we got a house on 4 acers, and it was awesome not haveing nehbors, but than several months ago I just got realy depressed and down because they started talking about leaving Afghanistan, and than no shit can't even make this up, the house litterly cracks down the middle, and she just says she couldent do this anymore, becuse no matter how much we continustly improved and our lives and standards of living just continueusly kept improving, but she was just done being a adult and disided to move back in with her dad, and maby go to school, I honestly don't even know what she's doing now. We talked resintly but that was only to figure out if we're going to do our divorce threw MS or TX, and what state offers a simpler process.

And now all this happens with the love of my life and it's just kind of like, this is all so recent am I even in the right state of mind to again not jump into a relationship, but I guess prosue just like a female companion, with the intent to you know basically act like we're in a relationship and but with this whole supper long process of realy and truly getting to know eachother.

Because I highly dought I'll ever hear from this chick again, but I swear I'm the most hopfull and confident mother fucker in the world, so it's just like offcourse things will work out eventually because I live here now and forever, so how couldn't it, but yesterday definitely clerified alot of how she feels, and that's were I than go and say,"o ya" does it clarify her feelings for you because you have no idea what was said and happened and you can't even ask now without looseing everything that you said youed get to be with her in the first place.

But I mean with all that said, it's like there's litterly nothing I can do, without again risking my freedom and benefits, and honestly if I hurt her that bad, to get to this point, I'm just not even going to mess with it, ied like to be with her, but that's probably never going to happen.

So than it comes full circle to the original question, am I even emotionally ready to try a procue, any kind of realtonship and any level with anybody, becuse I feel ready, and I'm financially ready, and I actually have like a living situation going for myself, and I'm in school to get a super high paying job working over at stenis makeing 47$ starting and only working a 9-5. Like relationships aside I've litterly never bene doing better with this thing we call life

But with how this whole situation just went down, that has me questioning myself, granted there were alot of complexitys to It and while I didn't have the right to threaten someone else, I feel like theres some justification in getting mad over it. But still i question myself because I talked down to someone who I love and that's not ok.

And than all the stuff with my wife, granted litterly none of it was my fault, theres litterly nothing I could have done to prevent any of it, but I just have this feeling that I let her down and I don't ever want to let someone down that bad, and with that like litterly you can do everything right, and sometimes life just happens and dicides to repedaly fuck you, and so the moral of all that, is, I'm not saying I'm tore up about it, I'm not saying I want her back, she abandoned me, what I'm saying is that was my wife, and I feel like I let her down, like if that makes scene, it's not a regret thing, it's marriage is something that I think should be held really dear and sacred, regardless if it's good or bad, or if you got. Married for the right or wrong reasons. So I'm saying it's like I feel like I failed as a husband, and I failed in the role of being a husband, and again it's not regret and it's not me wishing it didn't happen, I believe in traditional values and, twice over the span of a year we lost the roof over our heads, again not my fault, but I take it personally in a way.

So what's the boild down thots on that, and going out and starting something new, or more specifically slowly working towards that, I don't want to gain someone's trust and than not actually be able to provide, or more or less go threw actuall hardship with someone, and it's because they chose to follow me around there now in a situation, again I didnt actually do anything wrong with any off it, but it's kind of like my deployment in reality I just did my job, and that's that, but I still take surtan parts of it personally

So that and than, just recently I got drunk and talked down to someone I loved, and was really mean, and than put them in a situation that wasn't right, again none of it was right at all, and it was super complex, but regardless I don't like how that ended becuse it ended in fear, and at the end of the day, that's the one thing I always told myself I would never do again with any female, but hey fucking insain shocker it litterly just so happen to be with the same person who originally made me say that to myself.

So it's those 2 things that really have me on the fence, becuse it's like I'm saying I just want some kind of companionship that's more than friends, and a little more serious, but i know that me as a person, emotionaly it will take god knows how long, before Ill be able to actually love them, becuse I'm still trying to re-evaluate what exactly does It mean to love someone, becuse to me it's ride or die, for better or worse, no exceptions, and honestly the biggest factor that will come up is what are there feelings for me, becuse like if they can just be loyal, honestly say the love me, and be there for me and just be enjoyable to be around, thated be enough to earn my love, but now I'm at the point we're it's like, well ied need proof to offer myself fully and truly look them in the eye, and say I'll always be there for you and you can always count on me

And that's the million dollar question, at what point do you actually have proof, at what point can you actually know, becuse like if I'm going to just try this with some random person, like we're do you set the bar, what standard do you hold them to

So like talking to people and actually have a realtionship of sorts is easy to maintain and do. But I'm at the point we're I want the person I die with, spend the rest of my days with. Because picking up chicks, going out, fucken, haveing fun, that's all super easy and has never bene a problem, but actual love, and my idea of what it is, I honestly question if it exists, I've only felt it at it's most real with one person, and with my wife, we knew eachother for 9 days, and it was kind of like hey, "I'm going to be completely honest with you, I relay like your personality and I like you as a person, so do you want to take a shot in the dark, see what happens, get married, so I can move out of the barracks and you can move out of your dad's house", and she said yes, and her only input towerds it was we can't tell our familys tell your out of the army because we barely knew eachother, and we just wanted to keep things simple.

it really was like a friend's moving in together and just living life and and enjoying each other's company and there was love but there was no foundation to our relationship at all, 9 days. That is some army shit right there.

But ya that was really interesting, becuse the whole idea was trile by fire, becuse know we talked about it seriously, and what we were both looking for, and so the idea was you know how, there are sertan things about people that you just don't like but you live with it or accept it because you love them, well that was going to be our thing, just see what happens.

And the whole will wait tell your out of the army thing was because, by that point we'de have actually successed and started a happy life or we'd still just be friends by the end of it, and so wene your In the army they pay for you to get a house, so it was a win win for both of us, and it had the potential to be so much more, so we littrly said fuck it let's see what happens.

So that's that story and background becuse I don't want it so seem like I'm talking shit about her, by saying there's no foundation, it's becuse there litterly wasn't, and wene I say she abandoned me, ya even thow again our standard of living littlerly kept going up, and fast, we went from a 1 bedroom apartment, to a 4 bedroom house, to a 3 bedroom house in 4 acers. Life litterly just beat us into the dirt back to back, and she was just done with being an adult at that point, I guess you can only loose everything so many times before you just give up.

Ok another example, the love of my life, I litterly met her at a party, litterly love at first sight I have never experienced that with anyone else, asked her on a date at school, and we were together after that, like a couple, and that lasted years, granted the foundation came from dating for so long and then we got engaged, so completely different than my marriage

But the moral of that and what I'm trying to say, and trying to explain, is how the hell do you move slow, while having compassion, and I guess properly feel them out, and like actually get to know them as a person and at what point can you genuinely trust them, like at what point is it litterly you can say ok This is the one.

Because with the love, she couldnt leave here family and come to elpaso, at the time I didn't understand that, and sadly I lost my temper over it. And I honestly don't even know what this last attempt was, I'm just going to call It horrible timing, litterly the worst time for me to show up.

And with the wife, we litterly tolk those vows "for better or worse" and wene stuff got worse she left.

So for the wife I could littlerly never take her back because she broke our vows, and with the love I dought shill ever call, or have anything To do with me again, but sadly I dought I could ever actually give up hope that shed call, becuse it's like hey, just like the first time, I didn't understand why she'd have a problem moving all the way to elpaso, this second time now, This was beyond a complicated situation, and just like before I wouldn't hold it against her because, again this was just a all around horrible situation, litterly just wow, and this is the part were I step back and realy have to remember my mind works alot differently and so while it comes off as a open and shut situation to me, and I tried to work with her I really did, but I could never understand any of this from her point of view and the struggles and complexity of how this must have bene from her side.

But getting back on topic, I'm trying to explain this so I can read it all and try and figure it out myself.

Basically, if I start something with someone new, how do you actually get to the point were you can say you fully know them inside and out, have absolute trust, and know in your heart, that there the one, and even at that, would it ever be far to them, becuse I have a idea of what my perfect some is, and it's just this horrible reality with both the first time and second time, and how it ended, nether of those situations were her fault, and becuse of that i can't blame her for eather situation, and as unlikely as it is, that's still what I want.

Again back on topic, with my wife I always had that problem of comparing her to my love, and a prity big chunk of me still wanted her but out of respect for her choice I stayed away, and This go around I'm not worried about the legal ramifications at all, but it's the fact that I got to the point it did, I'll stay away out of respect, becuse the police are a joke and I'm not afraid of them or the possibility of dieing, but if she and the people in her life thot that was the only option they had, than ya, I feel as tho I have agian lost the right to speack to her honestly, and that's the conclusion I came to after I really sat down and thot about the situation, and I just hate it because I'm not a bad, mean, hatefull, or evil. But wene loyalty and truth becomes a problem I don't know why, I litterly can't explain it, but it sets me off, and so know she has the first time she ended it because I questioned her loyalty and lost it wene she called off our marriage, and now this time, again it was overly complicated and I could never understand all her feelings about all of it, and again I lost it, and didnt go about it correctly, I just hope she knows who I am as a person, like I was able to prove that to her over the course of the month and that I really tried my best but everybody has a breaking point and I guess mines a month.

Good dame I keep going on tangents. Ya so I'm not looking for flings or a girlfriend, I've already played those games way to much and had my fill of it, and I just don't want to approach it in a jaded way, or just have unrealistic standards, becuse there's only one love, and she can never be replaced, but maby there's someone different out there that can also be a love, not a replacement but just everything I want and more and, hopefully better, becuse I'm starting to think that looking for a replacement isn't the right way to go about it, like it seems like a toxic mindset or a self defeating prophecy, becuse you can't replace a person everybody's unique, and you can't just find a replacement. And I think I understand that know

So I hate wording it like this, but the hunt isnt for a replacement it's for something better in it's own special way, and I hate wording it like becuse at surface value it sounds like, there could be a better version of her or like there is just someone better, but that's not the case, it's just I need to find someone who's special in there Owen way and not sit there and compare here to my love.

Suppriseingly the dreams stopped and again I don't want it to seem like my interest in her is gone or any less, but that burning need to have her in my life isn't realy there just because, the way things ended this go around and everything that went into it, if she doesn't feel the same, than I mean that's just life at that point, it's a shame we didn't get a chance to rebuild it, but I helped however I could and anyway shed let me, and again I still love her more than anything, but the situation wasnt exactly open and shut, and if things got to a point we're fear is involved, than ya, I wish I could say sorry, but thats not really a option now.

I don't know, I think honestly just sitting here a writing this shirt story I finally put some of the pieces together.

If she ever calls I'll drop whatever I'm doing and give her 100% of me and all I can give, and becuse the odds of that are really low I think, I'm going to try and find someone, and not set any kind of standard based off of past relationships and personality traights that compare to her, or make any comparisons at all to her, this process will take a long time, but I need to find someone who is special in there Owen way, and accept who they are without comparison, not a replacement but just something new, the only expectation, and only thing that is a must, is trust, loyalty, and loves me for me, becuse that's not right and it dosnt make scene to compare someone to a very special person from my past, becuse there's only one love, I've searched high and low, there's not another, so who knows maby one day, but ya I've explained that enough, so ya who would have thot all it would take is a short story to figure out how I should approach the next person

[naughtygirl286]

This one is a lil bit late but yes This past Tuesday we did go see MORTAL KOMBAT! I was excited about this being I am a player and a fan of the series.

I remember playing the First one when it was first released into arcades yes that is when I first started gaming when arcades were the main thing! lol but yup I played the original game upon its release and of course played MK 2 and 3 as well as Ultimate and when they were released on console I played them on that as well one of my favorites was Ultimate MK3 I played that constantly! I didn't play alot of MK4 and at the time Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance (MK5) was the last one I had played and then I took a break from the series and didn't do 6-8 and then picked it up again at Mortal Kombat 2011 (MK9) (which I have some gameplay of on my YT channel) I also Have MK 10 and MK 11 as well I haven't played much of 10 yet and haven't played 11 at all but when I do I'll have some videos of it for YouTube 😁

But as for movies and stuff I remember watching the Animated Series and I went to see the Original movie on opening weekend in 1995 and again to see Annihilation in 1997.  I also remember there was some type of live action TV show but never watched any of it but I long heard of a new movie which leads us to this.

So I was excited to see this and I would have to say it didn't disappoint, I did love the movie it was lots of fun.   I enjoyed it alot I think making it R rated and having the gory, bloody violence was the way to go and made it feel more like that games and having the "fatalities" in there also was really cool and I'd say rather excellent

The fights and stunt work is pretty awesome in this and the characters get actually use their powers during Kombat just like in the games you get to see Kano's eye beam, Liu Kang using his fire, Kung Lao his hat, Mileena teleports, sonya energy rings they do it all and it did make me smile seeing all this in the movie the movie itself is fully of references and nods to tons of stuff in Mortal Kombat Mythos I would have to say a smiled alot while watching this

I did hear some complaints about the acting but I can't really complain about it I thought it was well done and everyone did an amazing job I did kinda miss Christopher Lambert as Lord Raiden lol but I think one of the best performances in the movie was Josh Lawson who plays Kano  I thought he played him perfectly and he is hilarious in this you just want to watch him tell ppl off and listen to him go off on some weird tangent lol but yes this does have a tiny bit of humor in it it like that Action Movie type of humor that did get a few giggles out of me.

The visuals were very good too I love how they did the arms for Jax and I thought how they did Reptile in a pretty cool and interesting way. and everything Sub-Zero did was great and as I mentions all the powers and stuff like that was awesome! one of the things that kinda bothered me was Goro. Don't get me wrong he looked amazing and it was good that they went with a Digital character being you could do more with him and the scenes he was in were cool the only problem I had was he didn't seem to have the same on screen presents that the Goro had in the original 1995 movie had and its probably becasue they are 2 different Goros the 95 one was actually a practical effect it was a combination of both "guy in a suit" and animatronics The one from the new movie is cool but just doesn't have the same feel

people are claiming that there is no story.. There is plenty of story if you pay attention. The Movie does I think a huge amount of world building and incorporates alot of the Mortal Kombat lore in that it explains alot of things for ppl who are not familiar with the games or seen any of the other movies.   The story is basically this: Earthrealm has lost 9 straight tournaments to the nightmarish Outworld if they loose another Outworld and Earthrealm will merge. The evil Shang Tsung tries to cheat by killing all of Earth's chosen fighters before the tournament begins which would force Earth to forfeit. So an MMA fighter Cole Young joins Earth's greatest champions to stop Shang Tsung and his monsters. That’s pretty much it I don't see how that is hard to follow?

So in the end I liked it I thought it was great! I felt that the movie delivered on what you wanted to see in all its blood soaked glory. alot of ppl are comparing it to the original movie and I do think that is a bit unfair being they are 2 different things from 2 different times neither movie is perfect and there will be stuff from the original that you liked and stuff from the new one that you like but I do think the new one is great I had alot of fun watching it so I would suggest giving it a chance you might like it too.

[littlemisssquiggles]

Dragonic Musings: So…I have officially finished The Dragon Prince Book 3…

���And, I have no words. Like I’m incapable of forming coherent sentences right now. So, if you all would pardon me, I’m just going to share some screenshots from scenes that stood out most to me and screech my opinion of them in the most bluntest of fashions:

Ahem:

First and foremost, to all the people who urged me to watch this season til the end for more Rayllum:

WELL HOT DAMN! YOU GUYS...YOU GUYS WEREN’T JOKING! THIS MOMENT. THIS MOMENT RIGHT HERE. I THINK....THIS HAS GOT TO BE ONE OF THE BEST LOVE CONFESSION MOMENTS I’VE SEEN IN ANIMATED SERIES. YES I KNOW I SAID THIS ABOUT THE RAYLLUM FIRST OFFICIAL KISSY-KISS MOMENT FROM CH5 BUT...NAH! I THINK THIS MOMENT STOLE IT.

DON’T GET ME WRONG, ADMITTEDLY I WILL SAY THAT I LOVED THE RAYLLUM MOMENT FROM CH5 ALOT BETTER. BUT STILL...THIS WAS...THIS WAS JUST....

....I DON’T EVEN KNOW. IT’S BEAUTIFUL GUYS! NOTHING ELSE BUT THAT.

CALLUM STRAIGHT UP SPROUTED WANGS AND TURNED INTO A BIRD MAN FUELED BY HIS LOVE FOR RAYLA....AS CHEESY AS THAT SOUNDS, I’M EATING IT UP! AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT’S EVEN MORE INSANE?

THIS JUST MADE ME THINK BACK TO WHERE RAYLA AND CALLUM STARTED? REMEMBER WHEN RAYLA TRIED TO KILL CALLUM BACK IN BOOK 1?

REMEMBER WHEN CALLUM TOLD RAYLA THAT HE AND HER WEREN’T QUOTE, UNQUOTE, “THERE YET” BACK IN BOOK 2.

NOW LOOK AT THEM!

SERIOUSLY LOOK AT THEM!

STARTED FROM THE BOTTOM AND NOW WE HERE...UP ON CLOUD NINE!

WHEN WE RAYLLUMS STANS SAY THAT THIS SHIP SOARED, PEOPLE ARE GOING TO THINK WE’RE JOKING UNTIL WE SHOW THEM THE IMAGES!

RAYLLUM DIDN’T JUST SAILED, THEY FREAKING SOARED!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH THESE TWO!

MY RAYLLUM SHIPPING HEART! I CAN’T BELIEVE WONDERSTORM DID IT. I CAN’T BELIEVE AARON EHAZ AND JUSTIN RICHMOND DID IT ALONGWITH THEIR WRITING TEAM.

THEY WROTE A LOVE STORY THAT TOOK PLACE OVER THE SPAN OF THREE WHOLE SEASONS---9 EPISODES A POP TOTALLY IN 27 EPISODES. THEY WROTE A ROMANCE BETWEEN TWO CHARACTERS WHO’VE ONLY KNOW EACH OTHER FOR 27 EPISODES AND MANAGED TO MAKE THE PROGRESSION OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP AND EVENTUAL LOVE FEEL...NATURAL AND NOT...FORCED AT ALL. FREAKING AMAZING MAN! 

AND IT’S NOT JUST THEM. IT’S NOT JUST RAYLLUM

SOOOOO AMAYA AND THE SUN KNIGHT ELF....

THEY ARE A COUPLE RIGHT? OR AM I TRIPPING BALLS NOW? CAUSE...I SHIP IT. WHY NOT? I THOUGHT THEIR INTERACTIONS WERE SO CUTE >U< NOT TO MENTION THAT I LOVE STRAWBERRY GREN’S LIL SMILE OF APPROVAL AT AMAYA AND HER NEW ELF GIRLFRIEND. IT’S SO WHOLESOME.

GOSH I LOVE THIS SHOW.

NEXT UP....

ZYM WAS SOOOOO GOOD IN THESE LAST FEW EPISODES.

IT ACTUALLY LOVE HOW THEY TREATED ZYM MEETING HIS MOM FOR THE FIRST TIME. CALL ME WEIRD HERE BUT THERE WAS SOMETHING ALMOST HUMAN TO HOW IT WAS APPROACHED.

IT REMINDED OF THOSE SCENARIOS WHERE ADOPTED CHILDREN WHO HAVE TO MEET THEIR REAL PARENTS FOR THE FIRST TIME ARE HANDLED AND I LIKE HOW THE DRAGON WRITERS CHOSE THIS APPROACH FOR ZYM. IT FELT...REAL AND I LIKED IT ALOT. PLUS...

NOT TO MEME THIS MOMENT HERE BUT I’M GONNA TELL MY KIDS THAT ZYM’S MOM IS MUH QUEEN!

ZYM’S MOM IS SO PRETTY AND I LOVE HER VOICE. SPEAKING OFF...DOES THIS MEAN THAT AT SOME POINT ZYM IS GOING TO LEARN HOW TO TALK? 

CAUSE I’VE NOTICED THAT SINCE THE START OF THIS SEASON, THE DRAGONS---AT LEAST THE ONES WHO HAVE BEEN MONARCHS CAN TALK. SO WHAT IS THAT? IS IT THAT ALL DRAGONS CAN TALK IF THEY CHOOSE TOO OR...IS IT ONLY THE MONARCH ONES? I’M ASSUMING IT’S THE MONARCH ONES. EITHER WAY, I’M INTERESTED TO SEE WHAT ZYM IS GOING TO SOUND LIKE WHEN HE GROWS OLDER. WHILE I’LL MISS HIS LITTLE PUPPY DOG SOUNDS, IT’D BE SWEET TO SEE ZYM ACTUALLY TALK. MAYBE EZRAN CAN TEACH HIM TO TALK 8D THAT’D BE SWEET

OVERALL, THIS FINALE WAS REALLY REALLY GOOD. THIS SEASON WAS REALLY, REALLY GOOD. IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE REWATCHED THE WHOLE SERIES FROM THE FIRST BOOK. I’LL PROBABLY DO THAT FOR THE CHRISTMAS HOLIDAYS. BUT FOR NOW, I THINK I’M JUST GONNA GO BACK AND REWATCH THE RAYLLUM MOMENT FROM CH5 INSTEAD CAUSE...I’M SORRY I REALLLLLLLLY LOVED THAT SCENE.

BUT BEFORE I DO. I GOT TWO MORE THINGS I WANNA SCREECH ABOUT.

Not to be a Darth Vader or anything but....NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CLAUDIA WHYYYYYYYYYYY!

WHY! I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU! I MEAN...IN A WEIRD WAY, I GET IT. AND IN AN EVEN WEIRDER WAY I....KIND OF LIKE THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN CLAUDIA AND VIREN. IT REMINDED ME OF OZAI AND AZULA FROM AVATAR BUT...ALOT MORE....SYMPATHETIC, FOR LACK OF A BETTER TERM.

I GET THAT VIREN IS A VILLAIN BUT WHAT I LOVE ABOUT HOW THE DRAGON PRINCE HAS PORTRAYED HIM IS THAT...VIREN DOESN’T FEEL LIKE AN ENTIRELY EVIL PERSON. HE HAS SOME GOOD IN HIM AND IT COMES IN THE FORM OF HIS LOVE FOR CLAUDIA. YOU CAN TELL THAT CLAUDS IS VIREN’S PRIDE AND JOY. I WISH HE HAS SAVED SOME OF THAT LOVE SOREN BUT....THIS WAS THE CONFLICT.

VIREN IS A VILLAIN BUT...HIS CHARACTER IS WRITTEN SO WELL AND SO GREY THAT YOU AS THE AUDIENCE FEEL CONFLICTED. EVEN NOW AFTER HE’S DONE A SHIT TON OF EVIL STUFF, I STILL FEEL SYMPATHETIC FOR HIM BECAUSE OF HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS CLAUDIA.

I FEEL SO BAD FOR SOREN AND CLAUDIA. THEY WERE THE KIDS MAN AND IT SUCKED SO BAD THAT THEY HAD TO BE BROKEN APART ESPECIALLY AFTER SEASON TWO’S REVELATION ABOUT THEM.

BUT AT THE SAME TIME, I AM SO SOOOOOOOOO PROUD OF SOREN! SOREN WAS THE FREAKING MVP OF THIS SEASON.

I KNOW I GUSHED MOSTLY ABOUT RAYLLUM BUT SOREN AND ALSO EZRAN AS WELL WERE THE CHARACTERS WHOSE DEVELOPMENT STOOD OUT MOST TO ME. DON’T GET ME WRONG. EVERY CHARACTER SHINED THIS SEASON AND IT WAS HARD TO REALLY PICK FAVOURITES. BUT IF I HAD TO, EZ AND SOREN. ESPECIALLY SOREN. 

SO PROUD OF HIM.

THAT BEING SAID. I AM AT THE END OF BOOK 3 FOR TDP. FUNNY, WITH THE WAY HOW THIS SEASON ENDED, I WAS STARTING TO THINK THAT THIS WAS IT. I FIGURED THIS WAS THE END OF THE DRAGON PRINCE. UNTIL...

...DRAGON PRINCE BOOK 4....WHEN?

CLEARLY THIS IS A TEASER FOR WHAT’S NEXT TO COME FOR THE SERIES. EVEN THOUGH A SEASON FOUR HASN’T OFFICIALLY BEEN ANNOUNCED. OVERALL, I’M READY. THE STORY NEEDS TO CONTINUE AND WHAT I’M CURIOUS ABOUT IS WHAT ELSE IS THERE FOR TDP TO UNFOLD.

I MEAN, WE STILL HAVE MORE OF XADIA TO EXPLORE. WE STILL HAVE MORE ELF SPECIES TO ENCOUNTER. WE STILL HAVE TO GET RUNAAN BACK FROM VIREN AND REUNITE HIM WITH HIS HUSBANDO.

MORE IMPORTANTLY...AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS AS IF VIREN ALSO HAS RAYLA’S PARENTS TOO?

I KNOW RAYLA SAID THEY WERE BANISHED BUT...I CAN’T REMEMBER IF THEY WERE CONFIRMED TO STILL BE ALIVE?

I KNOW RAYLA SAID THAT RUNAAN AND TINKER (HIS REAL NAME ESCAPES ME RIGHT NOW, SORRY) RAISED HER AFTER WHAT HAPPENED TO HER PARENTS. BUT...ARE RAYLA’S PARENTS ALIVE? DID VIREN CAPTURE THEM LIKE RUNAAN?

Overall---okay I’m done screeching now----but OVERALL, this was another great season. I might even go as far to say that Season 3 is TDP’s BEST SEASON yet. I REALLY REALLY LOVED this season and I’m looking forward to rewatching it again in my recap of the whole series.

I feel as if this is the end of an Arc. Zym has been returned to his mother but the threat of Aaravos still looms on the horizon. So I think it’s safe to say that the Ozymondias Arc of the Dragon Prince story is complete and what’s next will probably be the Aaravos Arc. Another three seasons perhaps?

Either way, I’m excited to see what’s next for TDP. Words cannot describe how much I LOVE this series with its amazing story and AMAZINGLY WELL-WRITTEN CHARACTERS. I can’t wait to see what comes for the next arc. Looking forward to it when it comes out. In the meantime, that’s all I gotta say.

~LittleMissSquiggles (2019) 

[evilelitest2]

Are you familiar with the extensive history of the African continent? I'm asking because a surprising number of people seem to lack knowledge about the pre-colonial history of the Continent. It doesn't help that some of them go of on the popular stereotype of African history just being about tribes and mudhuts.

 I have some knowledge of Africa but not of the whole Continent, Africa is huge and has the oldest history of humanity in the world, so I would not say I have extensive knowledge of the whole continent, rather I know a few periods of some parts of Africa.  I”m pretty good at North African History and certain parts of Colonial Africa (Rhodesia/Zimbabwe, Nigeria, South Africa, the Belgian Congo) so compared to most white Americans i probably now more than most its still pretty shallow honestly, and there are whole sections of the continent where I don’t know any history prior to decolonization.   I’ve only taken 1 Grad school class on Africna history and a sub unit of an Undergraduate class in terms of the history rather than just contemporary politics.  

African history is really complicated and horrifically neglected (Outside of Egypt), and there are a few reasons for that 

1) Racism.  For the last 500 years, European Culture has been built upon the lie that African culture is not valuable, and that anything made by black people is just worthless.  So Africa is usually dismissed as just primitive or savage, but even among people who aren’t consciously racist, there is this notion that African history isn’t important.  If you make any effort to lean history, a lot of civilizations will jump out as “OMG SO IMPORTANT” like China or Mongolia or Persia, but SubSaharian Africa is usually just seen as “They fucked around until Colonialism happened (Ethiopia being the one exception).  And that racism is self perpetuating, the more worthless a region is seen, the less people go in to study it, which makes it more neglected, which means less people go to study it ect   

2) A limited notion of what is worth studying.  One of the most constant rules of history is that centralized states which build giant monuments and have standing armies tend to only respect other centralized states with giant monuments and standing armies.  So Rome respected Egypt because “Hey, they also built giant monolithic structures just like we do, and they have a capital city, and a standing army and a central administrative bureaucracy and a writing system and a legal code, and a ruler who commands it, sweet we get that.  Sure they are inferior to us, the Greatest Empire in the history of the world, but still they are in the club.  So civilizations that don’t have those features, which are decentralized or never invented a writing system or didn’t build huge structures often are just dismissed as...not worth studying.  And since this includes a lot (but to be clear, no where near all) of pre Colonial African civilizations, there is this notion that “Nothing important happened in Africa until whitey showed up” 

3) Deliberate cultural erasure.  Of course we know that many parts of sub saharan Africa did have centralized states, and big buildings, and standing armies and writing systems, all that good stuff.  However when Colonialism happened, alot of the records of that were deliberately or accidentally destroyed by the Europeans, meaning that future historians can’t study them.  This is espicically true in regions where there were major colonial wars...and also the Belgium Congo.  Fuck you Leopold II.  There has also been some similar cultural erasure done by the post Colonial governments, though no where near as extensive.  

Ok so now unto the less malicious reasons Sub Saharian Africa gets neglected (though racism plays a role).  Note that North Africa isn’t included, it gets a lot of love actually. 

4) Lack of primary sources.  Historians are defined by the sources they study and unfortunately for many (but not all) parts of Africa...there aren’t as many.  Many parts of pre Colonial Africa (but I can’t empathizes this enough, not all) didn’t develop a writing system, which means we have to rely on Oral history.  and with several centuries of cultural erasure and genocide that makes it more difficult.  Now Oral history is often looked down upon by Historians which isn’t fair it has a lot of value, but it is a lot less...precise than written.  With a document we can say “this was written in 400 BCE” while with a story we can say “it looks like certain elements were added but where...who knows”.  its possible but it is a lot more difficult.  Now many parts of Africa did have written sources and we tend to know more about them (Mali, Ethiopia, Ghana) but a lot of those records were destroyed during colonialism or the civil wars that followed, or just the usual difficulties in preserving records every culture faces.  Also many (but not all) parts of Africa didn’t have paper, but substances that didn’t last as long (Palm leaves for example) and so the records are lost or more damaged. 

You can rely on Archaeological evidence but that is more expensive.  

5) Poverty and war.  Now we need to be super careful about generalizing Africa as a war torn improvised Continent because again..its a fucking continent, its huge and super diverse.  A lot of parts of Africa have had problems with war and poverty and unfortunately, those are not circumstances that create historians.  Places that have a degree of stability, wealth, and established education systems produce historians.  And since a mix of Colonialism, Post colonialism,, Neo Colonialism, and Nationalism can create consistent wealth issues for many parts of Africa, it means you have less historians.  There are still thousands of historians from Africa so I don’t want to over state this.  

6) Difficulty studying places.  The parts of Africa which are currently in a state of war, climate disaster, extreme poverty or just general instability are less likely to get historians to go there to study.  Like studying French history unusually means that you go to France, which isn’t so bad.  It still does happen though, I don’t want to over state it there are thousands of Africans of every region.  

7) Funding.  A lot of African countries have their own historical traditions, but many (not all) of those governments tend to encourage historians to study the stuff that gets more funding, which is usually the Colonial/Post Colonial period. Or to even go into Europeon history.  There is a lot more money and attention studying Apartheid or the Zulu Empire than South Africa in 1000 CE.  This is to say nothing of when regimes are actively nationalistic and limit what historians can study or try to force them to work within specific narratives.   This is even more true when it comes to European historical societies which have research grants and they want to give it to place that they already know about, which means that like 90% of African historians focus on the colonial era (which to be fair, is super important to study.

8) Incompetence.  A lot of early historian of Africa were Europeans who were...well they were bad.  And their mistakes have made it more difficult for everybody else following in their example.  

9) The Language thing: Finally, it is important to note that despite all of the above mention factors...there are millions of books written on African history.  There are tons of African historians who talk to each other and write works on every element of African history.  But here is the thing...not all of it is in English.  A ton of it is written in various native African language, or in the other major non African languages (French, Dutch, Arabic, Hindi, Spanish, Portuguese).  There is a lot written in English don’t get me wrong, but Africa has several million languages and so a ton of the material out there can’t be easily translated, which means that much of the info is inaccessible to other Historians.  Like if I wanted to study African history in serious depth, I would have to first improve my French and then learn a bunch of African languages, none of which are part of the English Language family.  So that would take years of study before i could even make a serious start.  Which limits it all.

Now again, even with all of those factors, there is a lot of African history out there, and a lot of it in English.  But most of it is high level academic history that you read at Grad schools or historical journals, not much of it has trickled down into “popular history” for the lay person.  Like a history enthusiast can get a pretty good understanding of the Byzantine Empire without ever going to college for it if they read the right popular histories of the period.  Most of Africa doesn’t have that, its basically starts (in the US at least) with the high level stuff.  

Also remember many of these African countries are quite young, so presumably they will produce more historical traditions given time.  

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

Bond Between People & Pokemon The Finale

Upon arriving at the battlefield Ganon had ordered all his forces to attack Kirby at once no matter what the cost.

Ganondorf: You must kill Kirby!

Villains: Alright!

All the villains ran past the heroes, each just standing awaiting the carnage that would soon arrive.

Samus, waving: Good luck, idiots!

Ganondorf: It is he who will need luck for he can’t possibly take on millions of soldiers at on-

Dark Link, flew by through the air. Landing on top of him followed Nightmare.

Dark Link: Ouch! Get off me! (Pushes Nightmare away) Why are we even trying!? (Running away) See ya once this has all cooled down boss!

Ganondorf: What!? Get back here and fight cowards!

Sephiroth: Worry not Ganondorf, you shall be rid of this pest, as I don’t plan on being bested by a marshmallow. Unlike these worthless soldiers.

Chara: Yeah Uncle Sephiroth will show him what’s what.

Bonny, Dedede & Incineroar had just arrived to where the battle was taking place - an injured Incineroar atop Dedede’s back.

Doomguy: Is that? Bonny!? My sweet bonbon has come back and not a scratch on her.

Bonny Janet: But Incineroar…Not so much.

Doomguy: Oh no…Don’t worry good ol’ three fingers (Points at Mewtwo) will take him back to the mansion to Dr. Mario. We’’ll see what he can do. But in the meantime-

King Dedede: Kick their asses Kirby!

Sephiroth: Can it traitor! Your little “hero” dies here! No more shall you pests interfere with our plans!

Bonny Janet: Go ta hell! Yer half pint, wee willy, prissy haired sissy!

Sephiroth self-consciously ran his fingers through his hair, then thrust his sword towards Kirby. Kirby turned and stared Sephiroth dead in his eyes, before grabbing the sword an inch away from his face. He smiled at Sephiroth then threw him through the crowd of villains so fast he set on fire, crashing through a few boulders on the way.

Sephiroth: Argh! *cough cough* How…Is that possible. (Faints)

King Dedede: It’s called being god and tons of friendship b-

Meta Knight: BITCH!

King Dedede: …How dare you steal that from me…

The villains stood in silence for a while.

Random Enemy: … … …RETREAT!

Ganondorf: WHAT!? NO! GET BACK HERE AND FIGHT!

Hades: Sorry bro, but we gotta get outta here. We can save your Ultimate Weapons or whatever for another time.

Ganondorf: You! You’re… … …No. No! NO! YOU’RE WRONG! I CAN BEAT HIM! YOU WORTHLESS PAWNS ARE JUST TOO WEAK! Sometimes you’ve just gotta do things yourself…

Ganondorf now fueled with hatred and malice transformed into his Demon King form, and stared Kirby down with his emerald, green eyes. Kirby in respondents stared back not flinching at all. Commence JoJo music.

Ganondorf: Let’s see you best the hands of a god!

Heroes & Villains: … … …Does he think being a God can save him?

King Dedede: That’s funny Ganon, we’d love to see you deal with Dark Matter every single day!

Ganon began charging towards Kirby with malicous intent.

Kirby, stepping forward: Poyo. (“Aw shit, here we go again”).

Kirby & Ganon collided in the air, sparks literally flying. Kirby then moved to Ganon’s stomach and started pelting a load of punches at him, pushing him back a little.

Ganondorf: COME ON! I KNOW THAT’S NOT ALL YOU HAVE TO OFFER!

Ganondorf then grabbed Kirby and dragged him around violently through the air, before hitting him away with his sword. Kirby recovering quickly then rushed over to Ganon pulled on his tounge and then slammed his own teeth on it cutting it off. Making Ganon completely speechless.

Samus & Link, leaning back: Damn!

Doomguy: Now I’ve done alot of gruesome things in my day…But that!…That was nasty.

A now immobilized Ganon fell to the floor to recollect himself. Kirby, however, had other plans. He made his way to Ganon’s tail. He picked him up by it and then began to swing him round in circles. (Keep in mind he’s 8 inches tall, and Ganon is now 23 inches tall.) He spun so fast it almost seemed like he wasn’t moving. After Kirby eventually released his grip Ganon was sent flying out of sight.

Hades: HOLY ZEUS!

He then came flying back from around the entire world and crashed hard. Pretty much causing a tremor. He then turned back to his original form.

Ridley, watching from afar: Ooh. You hate to see that happen.

Bonny Janet: Tha’s right! None o’ ya got shit, compared ta Kirby!

Chara: Dad!

Hades: Crap, Crap, Crap!

Sephiroth, crawling to Ganon: I’m sorry Ganondorf…For I have failed. I was not strong enough.

Ganondorf: … … …

Sephiroth: We must retreat…For now but we will be back. Once we have replenished ourselves.

Ganondorf: *Nods*

Ridley, flying down with a still unconscious K.Rool: That’s our que to return I guess…God your heavy.

Hades creates a portal to somewhere. And all the villains step through it.

Dark Link: See ya later losers!

Samus: Hmf…Funny…Last I checked we won. But now in related news…WE WON!

Heroes: Heck yeah!

Doomguy: And I bagged us a few goodies to.

Samus: What?

Doomguy: A plant! (Holds up Pirahna Plant)

Link: That’s kinda less bewildering.

Doomguy: Oh and a dinosaur!

Link: A wha-

Riptor, who was held in Doomguy’s shackles, attempted to lunge at Link, causing him to piss his pants scared, Samus came over to comfort him.

Link: Dinosaur’s are just big chickens… …I hate chickens.

Samus: Yeah, it’s alright sweetie, you made it (Kisses him). Alright, listen up heroes. We did well out there today. Thanks to Sakurai & Kirby we were able to rescue Bonny, Incineroar & Dedede. But they always will attempt to fight us again so we must always be aware. DK I’m looking at you. Now come on let’s head back.

After the battle everyone headed back to the mansion Dedede was welcomed back and the second he got there, gave Rosalina & Lucas a hug, but then got to get something to eat he was being starved for days. Joker got to take care of the new obtained Pirahna Plant. He seemed to be doing a pretty good job, the plant didn’t exactly do much harm. Just a lot of smiling. Doomguy began training his new stolen pet Riptor. Though at times it was pretty…Difficult. When Chara found out her pet was stolen she was definitely not very happy. And now to Bonny Janet & Incineroar. He still lay in Dr. Mario’s infirmary recovering from his injuries. At a moment like this her past self would have attempted to catch him. But now she understands that to gain a pokémon as a partner you need to have strong bonds. So now she steps into the infirmary.

Bonny Janet: Hey, Incin. Still in tha’ coma o’ yours. They all know about wha’ yer did ta save me…Even if aye was human. They all understood tha’ yer actions were derived from the selfish desires o’ hatred for the ones tha’, yer know…But yer know wha’? (Puts her hand on his paw) Aye’ve learned something from this experience. No matter pokémon or trainer…Yer should never take one another for granted…All the pain & suffering you went through was to protect me. Even if yer still hated me…Yer still cared….I’m such a coward…I can’t even say this to you properly… … …Well…See ya.

Bonny gets up to leave only to be stopped by something that was pulling her back from her hand. Her eyes lit up, at what she saw. Incineroar was opening his eyes.

Bonny Janet: In…Incineroar?

Incineroar: Huh?…Bonny? What? Did I? I lived!?

Bonny Janet began to cry heavily and ran up to Incineroar and gave him the biggest hug she could offer.

Incineroar: Woah! Umm…

Bonny Janet: I’m sorry…sorry for all the stuff tha’ happened ta yer. It was all because o’ me. If it weren’t for me. Yer wouldn’t ‘ave got hurt.

Incineroar: No. You’re wrong. Kid…If it wasn’t for you, I would still be working for those braindead knuckle draggers. With you by my side. You showed me the true light that resides within, not just humans, but all living things alike. And I thank you for that.

Bonny Janet held Incineroar tighter now knowing the stress of the belief that her actions caused harm could now be lifted off her shoulders.

-One Week Later-

Bonny Janet: A'ight I’m about ta do it but I 'ave ta ask one more tame. Are yer sure?

Incineroar: Yes! How many times kid?

Bonny Janet: Aye just don’t know if aye should.

Incineroar: Kid, you’ve been trying to do this most of your time here. Now you’ve got the chance and your turning down the offer? Make up your mind. Besides I don’t exactly gotta stay in it.

Bonny Janet: (sigh) Ok fine. (Holds up a pokéball) Ready?

Incineroar: As I’ll ever be.

Bonny taps the pokéball against Incineroar’s fist. It wobbled around a few times before clicking in place showing Incineroar had been captured.

Bonny Janet: Yes! I did it!

Everyone who was apparently watching: YAY! After so long she did it!

Incineroar: Hey this place is pretty cosy. There’s a bed, not that I’ll sleep in here. A play area. A wrestling ring!? How are they fittin’ this stuff here!? THEY HAVE A JACUZZI!?

Bonny Janet, sending him out: A'ight that’s enough, Nirvana.

Incineroar: No my Nirvana. Dude that place was incredible I should’ve got caught ages ago.

Bonny Janet: Tha’s not what matters remember Incineroar? Hold up aye’ve gotta give yer a name…How about…Jasper, the rings roaring flame!

Incineroar: Jasper 'ey? That ain’t too shabby. And yeah I know all that mumbo jumbo. It ain’t about profit, power, or Nirvana. It’s about…

The Bond Between People & Pokemon

Incineroar: HEY TITLE! You stole my line!

Bonny Janet: Come on we’ll just boot their arse later.

Incineroar: Yeah, in the mean time let’s kick everyone eles ass!

The End. :3

[bluerosesburnblue]

Hi blue! ❤️ I've been in a lot of discords where alot of the KH fandom confirms their belief in the SRT. I have a pretty decent understanding of lore so far. I got into some nice debates where fans defended the SRT soley off an existence of a different wordline. I'd ask "So if Sora was able to pull all the guardians into a different worldline... Xehanort could've just targeted the princesses of heart - why would he follow them.. if this theory was Canon??" And I'd just watch then hit silence.

To add context to my previous, I don’t understand how Riku being Sora’s light has any reason to even be included in this theory. To me, this theory should’ve had the focal point only on the idea of multiple world-lines, but having looked at all your blogging in that regard, the clear and excessive inconsistencies in their theory shows that the sleeping realm wasn’t the focal point. I follow some of the writers of the theory… And after sharing the doc they only celebrated Riku and nothing else             

Honestly, thank you for your effort in breaking it down. I knew I wasn’t crazy when I thought that something didn’t really seem right with the theory. I watch a lot of KH theory videos on YouTube from small creators with no shipping bias and they’re honestly very creative and genuine with their work. I understand how they feel about their ship, I love Kairi so much and would cry if she got her own game. I just think they should’ve left the Riku thing on its own and kept it away from this theory.             

Hey there! And thank you! I’m gonna talk a lot so to keep this from clogging up everyone’s dashboard, it’s going under the cut

I think I may have touched on it a little bit when I was explaining why even if the writers say this isn’t an “it’s all a dream” theory, I still feel like it has enough similarities to be considered one and… you’re absolutely correct. There is no reason for Xehanort to follow the Guardians into a new worldline. We don’t even know if he’s capable of it. We also don’t know if his planned universal reset just works in the worldline he’s in, or if it would erase all of them. We don’t know anything about worldlines other than that it’s a term Luxu used, like, twice

If Sora and Co. hopped worldlines, Xehanort would just grab the Princesses and win. If Sora and Co. hopped into the Sleeping Worlds… then Xehanort would also just grab the Princesses because the heroes still aren’t around to stop him if they’re in the Sleeping Worlds. It might take a little extra time, especially if we go on their assumption that Kairi is dead since now he’s gotta go find Princess #7 again. Because let’s not forget that this theory also claims that Kairi did not hop worldlines and that the Kairi we see is a Chirithy she’s piloting from the other world. That she died in

(Personally, I think there’s a fundamental misunderstanding of Xehanort’s character throughout the whole theory. He’s not a master planner. If he was, none of his plans would have ever failed, and he makes very clear in DDD that the plan to use TAV was intended to succeed. He is a master opportunist who’s excellent at making sure he has just enough irons in the fire that if one plan fails, another’s already going. The issue is most prevalent in the part of the theory where they try to claim that he planned the paopu scene. And uhh… any part where they make it sound like Xehanort has big plans involving Sora. He doesn’t.

His plan in DDD was opportunistic. He never planned for Sora. Sora was this thorn in his side who was constantly messing up his plans. If you know that no matter what you do this boy is going to mess you up, then how do you remove that threat? Either kill him, which is unlikely as Sora also makes for a decent Light if need be, or bring that power onto your side. He also didn’t like… give YMX time travel powers just to get Sora. That was another opportunistic iron to add to the fire. Like, if I knew that I was going to do something that would give me time travel powers and that I could pass that on to other versions of myself, why the hell wouldn’t I go back to the earliest version of me that could make use of that? That way I have the power… literally from a very young age and continue to have it my entire life. It’s a paradox, sure, but a damn effective one. He would’ve had Ansem go back to give YMX the power regardless. Knowing where Sora was at the time was just a byproduct, and one that he later found a use for

But after the plan to force Sora to join the Darknesses fails… Xehanort doesn’t really have to do anything. He knows that Sora’s a meddler who will fight for the light and is easy to goad into emotional actions. That’s one less Light that you have to worry about getting to the battlefield, because the kid will do it himself. There’s no need to have Kairi involved at all in terms of the paopu fruit thing? There’s no need to plan literally since flinging child Kairi into the abyss out of curiosity for her to make Sora fall in love with her. Like, again... he doesn’t really have a grand plan that he’s been implementing from the start so much as he has several plans that all require roughly the same or similar pieces. Xehanort only makes extra effort for himself if he feels like it could serve multiple purposes. He doesn’t see Sora as worthy, so he’s going to expend the most minimal effort on him. That’s one of the things that I think this theory fails to understand most; Xehanort doesn’t really care about or have grand plans for Sora. So long as the boy fights for one side or another, Xehanort’s already got what he wants

So with Xehanort being such an opportunist with so many contingencies... why would he pass up the chance to do things the easy, if more time-consuming, way by just... staying in the world without the heroes and succeeding with Plan B while knowing that there’s no one around to stop you?)

But, rambling about Xehanort’s characterization aside, you bring up something that I was planning to talk about once I finished going through the theory. My plan at the end was to go over what I felt that it did right or wrong writing-wise. And one of the things it does wrong is that it’s actually several mini-theories very loosely tied together that don’t prove each other

Making a theory about what you think a worldline is is its own thing. Making a theory on KH3′s connection to the Sleeping World lore is its own thing. Making a theory that Riku is really Sora’s light is its own thing. Making a theory that Kairi’s been controlled by Xehanort this whole time is its own thing. None of them correlate

The only reason to include all of them together, and this is going to sound really jaded, is if you intend to trick people into believing that your interpretation of Riku’s and Kairi’s contributions is canon. Because if they’re presented together, then it comes with the implication that if you accept that part of their theory is true (the definition of worldlines, the connection to Sleeping Worlds), then you have to accept that all of it is (Riku is the one whose act of true love saved Sora, Kairi’s contributions were all planned by someone else and therefore less legitimate than Riku’s, etc.).

And I don’t think I’m wrong to read that intent into it. From what I’ve read of the theory so far, they’ve made their shipping bias outright clear (calling the video files soriku_sleuthers as though they’re looking for evidence supporting their ship, spending an entire section on proving that Riku’s “most important person” is Sora and that the feelings are romantic...). Spending about .2 seconds on any of the creators’ Twitter accounts also makes the fact that really all they care about KH-wise is Riku’s part in the SoRiku ship (not even Riku as a character, because they get his character so totally wrong in the theory, but just what Riku contributes to the ship)

I don’t know if it was intentionally done by them or not. It’s possible that the natural ship bias clouded how they interpreted events in the game, too, to the point where they legitimately think that their interpretation is just obviously correct because the content that they interact with most and longest leads to that idea. I’ve already talked about how confirmation bias clouds the entire theory so thickly that they unintentionally discredited everything in it by that alone. But the point remains that the only reason that I can see for having an entire section on how perfect Riku is and how pure his love for Sora is, and another on how Kairi is Xehanort’s pawn trapped in another worldline, is because the easiest way to legitimize those as “canon” is to attach them to something that you think you can prove is canon

Except there’s so many holes, so much misinterpretation, and so much... I almost want to say forged evidence because that’s the only way I can describe what they did to Xigbar’s speech on Olympus, that there’s a mountain of things that can be logically and soundly proved to be incorrect and absolutely no decisive evidence so far proving that any part of what they’re saying is true

I’ll give them some credit, though. The SoRiku stuff doesn’t take up the bulk of the theory and is apparently subtle enough that even quite a few SoRiku shippers don’t think it’s even really a part of the theory. But that ignores the fact that while they have a ton of “evidence” unrelated to the ship, the inciting incident that the whole theory revolves around is the idea that Riku’s act of true love in sacrificing himself to save Sora (attributing Kairi’s sole salvation of Sora to both Riku and all of the other Princesses of Heart) allowed Sora to transfer everyone (except Kairi) over to a new worldline and also the Sleeping Worlds. It may not harp on it, but the theory absolutely pushes SoRiku as the canon ship if you want to believe that the theory is canon because they wrote it so that the events they’re describing cannot happen if it isn’t

It’s why they couldn’t keep the Riku stuff out of this theory even if they wanted to. Even if it would’ve made for a more believable theory. He’s the only part of this damn thing that they really care about

Again, I’m going to go into everything I think this theory does wrong at some point. And I’m sorry that this got so long and ranty! Seeing old followers go in and reblog the debunk stuff right now, which is attracting new followers like you is actually really fun and heartening to watch and I’m so glad that you liked the content enough to tell me! I wish the theory hadn’t become what it is. I wish this debunk wasn’t something that was even necessary. But I am grateful that it’s given me the opportunity to chat with a lot of people, yourself included, about this fandom! Up until I started this project I was relatively unknown in the KH fandom. I really hope that the upcoming debunk stuff meets everyone’s expectations!

[dolce-fritz]

So being the new evil girlfriend is fun

So recently my Partner has had some majorly stupid ass drama with their ex. Like this girl, she’s loopier then the Olympic oval, Like normally I’m nice and don’t slander people but like. She’s just, hoo boy. A mess.

And yeah this is from a completely biased stand point. And I’m about to tell you why that I feel the way that I do about this girl from my own experiences. This is going to be long winded, so I’m putting it under a read more. 

So I moved from the lovely state of Utah this year, my homelifes never been 100% great. I love my mom but our issues clash and we do better separate. Not to mention I really wanted to try it out in another state again and this time the right way and not just a spur of the moment decision while i visited like what happened with Florida.

Well, planned my vacation to See my at the time friend to see if I really liked it there.  I knew about their recent split with their Ex, and the two seemed pretty amicable about it. The other roommate was.... hoo, a mess to say the least. and My friend didn't want to be alone with her because they actually had been wanting to tell her to leave because of the issues that she'd brought into the home. anyways that in itself was a bit of drama.

So I was like OK. I'll come check it out and if I like it I'll be your new room mate.

Well. I plan my trip about four weeks out. and end up pretty excited about it. Come to find out with no real surprise that My friends Ex is going to move out before Octobers over.

My friend starts panicking. again doesn't wanna be alone with the other roommate that they're having hardships with. So I say ok... I'm going to do this vacation, then im just going to move on the 20th so I can get my stuff packed.

Shits already starting to go down hill.

I get there. everything seems fine. The ex seems nice, things seem ok. the other roommates.... already trying to cause shit with me and im not even physically in the house. I'm sleeping on a mattress on the floor in an old office space. bought a bunch of furniture because at this point. I know I'm moving here. Its going to happen. This is where I'm going to live might as well help my friend end up getting it taken care of.

Well. Day three of my vacation hits. The ex drops that her dad wants her to move out that day. completely screws the pooch for my friend and the other roommate. And basically bails on them and leaves the house just with the things she wants and then just leaves all the rest of her junk here like its her own storage unit. claims she’ll be back for the rest [ Spoilers never happened]  so that... right there puts this sour taste in my mouth. Cause yeah, me and her ex at that point are sharing a bed. Because like theres only three beds in the house until she ends up leaving and so my friends like ill just sleep with you. me i’m very fine sharing my sleeping space with my friends. i’ve done it literally all my life. hell a its not a goodnight sleep unless your on your best friends bed snuggling the shit out of her kaneki ken body pillow listening to true crime documentaries on the TV but like seriously it was no big deal to me. which im begining to wonder if it was a big deal to her. Either way apparently instead of waiting till i officially moved. she bailed and forced my hand. So I had to stay, I couldn’t properly say goodbye to my mom. couldn’t properly get my shit packed. all cause I really didn’t want to leave my friend alone till I could officially move in. So already, I started getting a slight distaste in my mouth for her. but I let it slide. I know how overbearing parents are sometimes.  well, so i cancelled my flights. money spent that i was never going to end up getting back that I could’ve later used towards something for the house.  The girl left. and I was left, Cleaning up the mess that she walked out of and left behind.  Turns out my friend was the only one that was cleaning up around the house. and working a part time job, while trying to side hustle some art for extra money.  They were the one that was handling all the utilities, while their ex was buying everyone food. Separate it would’ve been an easier task if it was just the two of them. but you add in the extra roommate that was only paying her share of rent and none of the food and utilities and shit starts piling up. Well.  sat down and looked at all the finances. found out that while yeah the Ex was making the most money. She didn’t bother to help out with any of the chores. I mean, they split the dish duty. And i’m sitting here wondering how long this pan of fish oils been on the stove for. had to buy new pans cause they were growing cultures.  Hell half her chores and the other roomates were doing the cat boxes. dude it was shit mountain in there. it was so bad the cats were going in the corner. Yet it was like my friend was expected to pick up after them and pick up their slack because they didn’t work as many hours as the other two. Which I’m sorry. if you can’t balance cleaning up after yourself. and working how the hell are you going to live on your own.  Well in comes me, the living off disability. [ which is not a glorious life] I have a lot of time on my hands. so first few days we douche out the house. things start looking good.  in comes the ex to get something and brings this utter douchebag of a man that boasts about him being the whole reason that they broke up. Which like when we were moving out the ex. the ex’s dads...girlfriend??? was like dont let them take advantage of you. which like made me pull up a shit ton of questionmarks. cause yeah i wasn’t going to let the other roommate do that cause i was kinda aware what her game was and it wasn’t playable with me.  everyone had their part to play in this household, and I wasn’t going to play mother for anyone. Well in comes this guy. boast about how he wont let anyone take advantage of her again and im like sure w/e dude. but like i started like... questioning wtf she was actually telling people that my friend actually did to her.  see, what i was told was that it was an intimacy issue. my friends pretty Asexual so like there wasn’t alot of physical involvement. and that things just weren’t going the way that their ex wanted them to. Turns out it was SOOOO much more then that. so curious me, got digging about this girl cause shit just wasnt really adding up.  and I started finding out things. At this time, friend started turning to partner. and eventually we started dating which made shit a lot more uncomfortable with me and this girl. cause yanno, new girlfriend. ex girlfriend. two things dont usually mesh well in situations like this.  Well so, started finding out that while in a relationship she was leading on a bunch of other guys, and at work would like do this whole “im bi” thing if the guy was cute. like she was very male centered for a “lesbian”  She was super horny on main during DND which made EVERYONE uncomfortable. to top it all off she was a narcissist, that had a victim that she could toy with.  She tried to convince my partners parents while they were still together, to talk to their child when there were behaviours that she didnt like. She tried to have an intervention with their friends to force them into transitioning FtM when they were happy just being nonbinary.  they would gaslight them, manipulate them, and  abuse them. I watched this girl in the span of three weeks tear my partner down with her words in front of me. and be nothing but venomous to them. for no other reason then they were actually happy.   While spining all these stories of how she was the one that was wronged.  Well, I started having enough of her coming around just so she could be mean to my partner. She’d come over. immediately go to our fridge to drink some of the booze she left and then pick at my partner for small insignificant things only because she wanted to fight. When i had enough of that. I told my partner, we’re going to DnD early. she can find her own ride.  She came to a family party, invited unknowingly by my partners brother that’s been over seas and in the military. She thought she was going to get a hookup complained she wasn’t having fun because he wasn’t paying attention to her. Snapped at my partners nephews because they wanted to play and made one of them cry. and was just toxic to be around.  That was strike two.  Strike three was watching how she conducted herself around our dnD group. she’d had this guy, mister “ i saved you from your bad relationship” on speed dial, and would tell him things. and then sit and shit talk him when she was bored with him to everyone. We were all sick of it.  The ending straw with me, was when we finally wanted to be done with this drama. told her three months before hand to get off the car insurance. and it wasn’t done. ended up causing a big thing.  She started saying that she’d leave the DND group to make things easier. because Thats what my partner would want. At this point i couldnt stand it any longer. Three months talking to everyone that physically knows her. and see’s what she’s becoming lead everyone to say the same thing about her She was turning into her mother.  No i know fuck all about that. i dont know her mother, i dont know anything about her. I know she’s on a shot that fucks with your brain and ends up messing with your body. I also was on the DEPO shot for three years of my life and its caused so many problems after i was off it.  and thats what i tried to impart to her my wisdom on.  therapy, and a depo shot.  now how we got there is really long winded, and highly dramatic.  id admitted to her our dnd group wanted to chat. she was pushy, respected no ones boundaries, and left our friends house a complete mess. just like she left ours... and god, she ended up pissing me off cause the girl left slippers caked in cat puke in my tub after staining my bathroom doing her hair dye. she disrespected my home, she disrespected out friends, and our friends home. and she was needlessly mean and cruel to everyone around her that didnt serve some purpose to her.  So yeah she had to go.  Here i am thinking that this is the end of it. but i get updates about how I’m apparently the worst abuser in the world just cause I told some spoiled brat of a woman to get off a shot that messes with the brain, and to seek therapy cause this girl needs help. Funny thing is im not the only one that said it. apprently just the loudest voice to have said it.  and this bitch still thinks i dont like her cause she’s not ‘ providing for us financially” We may not have a high roller life. but damn we’re doing just fucking fine. 

[pkmnsdarkqueen]

Mun talks about her D&D characters for munday

I thought it’d be fun to let ya’ll hear about them. Also I know a ton of them start with L names, I’m sorry and I don’t know how this happened. 

Lokni-Human Blood Hunter (TW: death, demons, sex, child neglect, pregnancy complications) Life goal: To kill Raktos the demon  Campaign: Ravnica

The current favorite of my friends who I’ve played a few games with. Personally I think he has one of the most tragic backstories but I had to give him an intense one cause he has a very dramatic goal. The campaign is set in Ravnica which for those who don’t know is a setting where most things take place in a large city where power is divided by guilds. My child is in the Raktos guild which is the ones who throw parties put on shows, and run the brothels. Thing is they also kinda murder folks alot, live on the idea of viva la anarchy and they do this to keep their guild leader, a massive demon happy so he doesn’t end the world. Now that you’re caught up his story goes as follows. He was born to two parents, things were great, his mom got preggers, she was out with her husband and got dragged into a Raktos show cause they do that, she was injured and basically it became either save her or her unborn child and he insisted on the child. Dad blames the kid for loosing his wife, neglects teh child, Lokni also a child adopts his dad’s mindset being confused and hurt, family friend of mom takes in unwanted child (she is a centaur by the way), Lokni realizes eventually his dad really doesn’t care about him either as dad slips further into insanity about wanting to bring his wife back, Lokni decides to go apologize to bro who instantly forgives to live with centaur mom. Later they are told their dad is dead getting mixed up with the wrong people (however based on hints from the dm I fear he is not dead and also fear when the dm brings him back). His goal as a character is this: He wants to make sure no family ever ends up ripped apart like his so he wants to kill Raktos and put someone else on the throne, not him cause he recognizes he is not emotionally stable enough to run anything. Although originally I was planning on making him more obsessive about his goals and basically become his dad, obsession and hurt drives people to crazy things, but he kinda ended up finding a 16 year old ghost girl in the woods who’s been stuck to possess a knife and basically was like,”well this child clearly has a rough time in life I’m gonna adopt them!” and fatherhood is forcing this man to rethink things cause murdering Raktos=major trouble and he doesn’t want to rip up this new family he’s making so now considering teleporting him away? changing him to be a good person? Yeh it’s getting complicated. OH and he was kind of forced to drink some potion stuff, cause his boss is crazy (she has a ghost choir that she possibly killed everyone there, complete with a kazoo section cause ya boi Lokni on a whim said it needed more kazoos and she listened to him cause he knows music, he plays the spoons and does magic tricks btw as a job, so clearly he knows what he’s talking about) and ye so he is a fox lycanthropy now.

Lapis Lazuil/Laz-Triton, Cleric.  Life goal: Literally be the best monster killer Campaign: Regular D&D 5e

Basically we had a D&D show we were filming at school up until things got too busy with the main show we were producing. This character came before Lokni and we were told,”hey so your characters are monster hunters at this guild but they’ve all kind of been kicked out of their former parties for one reason or another which ya’ll can decide and this is your last chance to stay in the guild.” Me: “cool imma make a triton that hates water, and their a tempest cleric.” Dm: “....why, why are you like this.” Me: “YOU SAID MAKE BAD DECISIONS!” So ye that’s how Laz was made. Her story is that she was adopted by rock genasi. She thinks her parents abandoned her. Truth is they just fell on hard times just before she was born and well couldn’t afford a child so did what they could now trying to find her. So she changed her birth name to be named after a rock like the rest of what she considers her real family. She also has the attitude of the stereotypical highschool cheerleader on disney movies and talks like one too but with a more raspy voice because she is dehydrated, again she hates water because of her hatred for her ‘real family’ and also she genuinely doesn’t like the way it feels,”It’s just liiiike the worst ya know, um like on my skin....yeah so don’t pass out in water or whatever cause like I probs won’t try to heal you....sorry not sorry.” That was literally her first line to the rest of the party. I now use her in one offs and like low key she is alot of fun. 

Luc-Pantoran (I forgot the class and the dm still has our character sheets cause thank you virus) Life goal: Clear their name! Campaign: Starwars 

So first of all funny thing about this one is that usually I have a gender and voice made pretty early into creating a character. With this person....I did not, like literally I got everything else figured out except these two details so I decided,”You know what! You don’t get either of them!” Their story went like this, they have 12 siblings ok, super rural regular family in the inner planets. All of their siblings are wildly successful and they were average. They knew they couldn’t really succeed like everyone else but hey did find themselves enjoying being a nuisance so basically when asked what they wanted to do with their life they would look up at the adult asking and just go,”Crime.” SO that’s exactly what they did. Once they became an adult they ran off, used sleeping with folks to get what and where they wanted, eventually joined a pirate crew, and life was great. They were so good, and kind of had a thing going with the captain that they became first mate. Pretty recently they realized they didn’t relate to either gender and became non binary, they also are still trying to figure out their voice so it would change rather often. Thing is they got framed for stealing from the captain, and hey they’ve done alot of bad but they HAVE NOT broken trust like that, after all they actually cared about the captain, and for once was considering being just with them instead of sleeping around. Nonetheless they are on the run now trying to clear their name. Their theme as a character is,”hey you know that little voice in your head that tells you not to do something, ye they don’t have that. Just a voice that says, do what ya wanna do pal!”

Clarity-Robot, vault dweller (Tw: death mention, human experimentation, dog experimentation) Life goal: Just see the world Campaign: Fall out

I love this character so much she is a baby however her theme is,”depending on perspectives people can come across as wildly different things.” So If you’ve played fall out no she’s not a Mr. Handy or one of the robots that looks incredibly human like. We decided an amalgamation of the two fit her story better and it was available in the unofficial fall out table top we were playing. She looks humanish, a human like form but with clear casing showing her inner workings and a human mask to try to look  more friendly. She’s got on a little yellow dress on too, very vintage, and with the sweetest most innocent sounding voice. She even travels with a Dalmatian who, as a robot could think of only the most appropriate name to describe her grizzled hound, Spot. As for fighting one arm can transform into a flame thrower and the other into a chain saw. Also as a robot she can not go against programming. She also makes comments such as,”I am overjoyed you will not become a plant!” “Oh no don’t pick flowers! I would hate to hurt the plant...” “Are you sure the grass will not mind if I step on it?” If you have played fallout you might know where this is going. Basically there are 2 vaults that are important, both of them are found over grown with plants one containing half human half plant monstrous creatures. Her story is that she was in the vault that laster holds the monstrous creatures. Her programming was to continue the experiment, the experiment to combine humans with plants in an attempt to improve upon humans. She could not tell the humans what she was doing, and she could not stop the experiment until it was complete. There were dogs there under her command to be used as experiments too or keep the plants in line. So the chain saw and flamethrower were to stop unruly plant monsters from attacking her and keep them in line until finally the order came that the experiment was over and she was no longer needed. So she left, secretly horrified by her actions attempting to avoid ever processing what she witnessed fully through her system. She wants to see the world for herself now with her dog friend. Again when people meet her she seems like a sweet angel going so far as to worry about even the feelings of plants, but for anyone who was in that vault they would see her as a very different person.

[96xie]

2019

a whole summary of this difficult year

2019 was full of unexpected good and bad surprises along with lessons and experiences.

january

spent good time with mocha, wayo and brian

had such a good time with guildies from our game

met up with some other ppl from the same game and didnt feel too good bc i was never good with crowds and/or groups that were already well established

tried tinder for the first time because i thought it would be nice to put myself out there for once

feburary

continued my tinder journey and actually had fun with it. it was pretty scary at the same time because it was such a new experience talking to other people and to have them notice you? because i always knew and felt that i wasnt really the desirable one.

actually hooked up with a guy from last months meetup and hung out twice. thought it was going somewhere because he, too, showed signs to progress further ((was wrong because he lied and showed red flags later))

one major red sign to me: no response after genuinely saying thank you for rides and dinner. im the type of person who always says thank you because im honestly grateful for the little and big things. he basically shrugged it off.

also, a huge liar. yah, big no

i brought him to my friends birthday bc they and himself wanted to meet each other, it was fun while it lasted but stuff happened

towards the end of the month, i cut my ties off with him for being awfully mean to me and also cut ties with my “friends” for having really bad assumptions of me.

i was frustrated with myself at that time bc his cats gave me a bad breakout and i felt super ugly. also i wasnt sad over him, but over the fact that i let myself be treated like a second option. eventually i learned that it was good that i didnt let things go further and that i only deserve the very best.

even though i was hurt, i thought it was a good experience, esp since i havent really been in the “dating game” for years. like it was a just a small step to putting myself out there once again

a week later after that a classmate asked me out and got tons of compliments from him and wondered “the universe really works in crazy ways”

march

met some cool people through the same mobile game on a discord server and they were much better than the first group.

also met this really funny dude in the same group. like he was so fun to talk to and he understood my dumb lingo

remember when my classmate asked me out on a date? it turned out a bit weird. but considering this was my first date in YEARS i thought it was a cool experience. got some carne asada fries outta him

i had the dude i was talking to call me so i could leave the date tho LOL ((he helped me lots, esp how to deal with awkward situations with my classmate. also at this point, i really liked talking to him but i wasnt rly sure if i wanted to date other guys bc i had been hurt previously)

this month was pretty much dedicating most of my time talking to him and i enjoyed it alot

also went to pubs for the first time to hangout with my coworkers. such an interesting place

april

tried rollerskating for the first time ever, ended up with a bunch of bruises but it was cool!

also tried 7leaves for the first time and instantly fell in love with mungbean

also went clubbing in sf with my friends and it was such a fun time like i had SO much fun

i got auctioned off of SAD! that phase was just a crazy ride. while there was many that dm’d me, there was only one special person that i only replied to and continued to talk to him on a daily basis

((honestly, i was scared that i was taking things a bit further with him because a part of me was like “are you ready for this?” and “have you really recovered from that guy?” or “can you give this guy your all?” just alot of overthinking))

spent 4/20 at sf with my friends, and overall had a GREAT time. took too many hits and drank so ya gorl was crossfaded. not sure if i wanna do tht again tho

unfortunately woke up with a swollen face and it lasted for a LONG time.

may

so my face is still swollen, still bad, red as a tomato and at this point i was really hesitant to meet up with the guy ive been talking to. i mean!! my skin was SO bad. i felt like i was gonna make a fool out of myself by scaring him away

but,,,, he was still willing to see me despite my appearance and : ( he was so accepting and typing this makes my heart ache bc he is SUCH a good man : (

i met up with the guy towards the end of the month in sj and first thing he does when i walk up to him is give me this great warm hug and so many smooches !!!!!!! like my heart is melting

eventually we became official !!! he got us an airbnb for the night and we jus spent time cuddling on the bed and honestly i : ( i like him so much

june

my birthday wasnt rly that like “wow” it was actually kinda annoying

my bf flew up to sf where we met up, explored the city and slept the night in at an airbnb. next day went to oakland where i introduced my friends to him!

went to my first festival with several with my friends, including ppl from our same guild from our game and it was SO fun

rolled for the first time and it was SUCH an experience. redosed like twice and ended up hallucinating which is something ill def not do again

also i really wished my bf was with me at that time : ( while i had an extremely fun time, i wish i shared that moment with him : (

july

went to vegas for my cousins 22nd bday. shit was wild

also rolled there.

also threw up for the very first time

a fight broke out at the club and that shit was fuckgin CRAZY and it was RIGHT next to our table

also used alot of my money for the whole trip in which nobody really told me about so …. i was like ok.. fuck …

also my skin was still bad during these past months so it was pretty hard masking it

like really hard. with someone with terrible eczema, its just extremely hard to hide it

august

bf flew to sac!!! he met my mom for the first time and we explored the city and stuff

and went on an ikea date! and! honestly i just really loved spending time with him :c

we also spent time with my friends! they came over also! and ate some fuckgin bomb ass waffles

and then took bus down to la to meetup with some friends from our guild towards the end of the month!

it was pretty nice to be able to stay with my bf in his apartment !!!!!

also some scalding tea but thats rly for another time

to make it super short tho: our friend that we’ve known much longer than the girl he met (less than 3 months) dropped our friendship SO quick lol

september

cousin bonding @ beach, too cold for tht doe

towards the end of the month, my bf flew me down!!! so i spent the weekend with him and like always, only had a good time with him!

AND ALWAYS EATING GOOD FOOD!

october

during this fall semester, i took online classes and one of them was a 8week class. there was a topic about mental health and how we can take care of ourselves better and i just thought it was such an important thing to cover. i feel like its not talked about enough

november

spent thanksgiving with my family down in morgan hill and ate good food! honey ham has a special place in my heart.

went black friday shopping first at walmart, lowkey disappointed in myself because i was bummed out the apple watches were sold out. the materialistic part of me jumped out oof

slept at my cousins then went to the mall! didnt get anything besides really good bulgogi fries. i hated going into stores tho cuz everything was literally crowded. hated it !!!!!!!

went to a small festival in sacramento with my friends at the end of the month and this time is 7 of us (than the usual 5)! it was sososo fun.

also took my coworker with me, it was actually amusing to see bc our group were all asian and he’s the only tall white guy

made hotpot at home and we also went out for milktea and waffles again! sooo good.

december

flew down to see my bf again and only had a good time! went to this garden with beautiful lights and ! ugh! SO pretty!

cried in his bed before my flight back, cried on the plane, cried at home and cried before i slept. i miss him

also racked up alot of hours so i could pay for my tuition and my family’s bills. kinda sucks bc im pretty tired but i gotta do what do i gotta do.

christmas was a bit lonely bc my mom went to the philippines and i dont rly talk to my brother but my kuya came the next day and we ate n watched stuff

overall, it was a whacky year. but im so glad to have met ed. he means SO much to me. a part of me was so hesitant to date him because i mean, he’s man with his life set. i dont have a car, im still in school, i have this part time job where im giving my mom all my paychecks and which the only money im keeping is just my tips (not much), i still have issues with myself and other conflicts and honestly theres much to do, learn and grow from. but he’s so supportive, understanding and loving and i love and appreciate him from the bottom of my heart. most of the time i wonder if im doing and if im being enough for him. i worry about that alot but he’s so patient with me. i laugh alot when im with him and i feel so happy.

did i mention that we are long distance? him being in la and me in sacramento. so the only thing thats connecting us is facetime. maybe once every two months will i see him in person but yep. when i had my first panic attack, i really wanted him right next to me. at that moment i felt even more sad because of course you’re gonna want you’re significant other during a moment like that. but anyways, i always miss him and i always want him next to me and i always love him. i want to hurry up and get my education done with so i can be with him. not to sound like omg im so madly infatuated with him type of thing tho. he’s someone who understands me and knows how to love me.

i hope 2020 treats me well despite all the challenges ahead of me.