#afab transgender

[vampb0yz]

[lit3rally-m1ke-whlr]

you were born a boy, because trans boys are boys!!

not being cis doesn't make you any less of a boy, I promise.

I know gender dysphoria sucks, but please remember you are a boy, and if a transphobe tells you otherwise don't listen.

transphobes just want a reason to hate us, their opinions mean nothing.

I hope your gender dysphoria gets better, or clears up. I know GD can be so tough sometimes; but please remember you are incredibly loved and your body does not dictate your gender.

sincerely, a fellow trans boy

-🌌

thank you so much, man, you have no idea how much it means to hear that 🥹 you’re really awesome and such a cool dude and I hope you have a wonderful day/ night!

[rocketcomics]

pure love

[genderqueerdykes]

we're in this catch-22 of "it's totally okay to mock afab trans people because they're cringy and women-lite" and "we have to protect afab trans people because they are women-lite and soft and pathetic and defenseless." and it makes me want to scream my fucking head off i'm not even afab and i'm tired of the absolute clownery and torture folks put these people through. enough is enough, if folks aren't bending over backwards to find reasons to exclude amab queer people, they're finding every reason under the sun to mock, belittle, hate and infantilize afab trans people because of their refusal to let go of misogyny.

y'all treat ALL parts of the sex binary like shit and enough is enough you can't sit here and hate someone for their agab if you're in the queer community. regardless of your reason. there IS no good reason to hate or mock someone because of their agab. let go of the binary for the love of god and stop giving afab trans people shit because you can't let go of your misogyny and you think it's a-okay to bully them because they're women in your eyes. like cut it the fuck out this shit is transparent as day i'm sick of it.

if i as an intersex person have to step in to defend agabs that aren't even mine, y'all are failing each other tremendously. do better.

[ruthimages]

[spookietrex]

Ngl I stole this from Facebook but I love this.

[moons-epiphany]

i am very aggressively protective over nonbinary people who look like they are amab/manly/masc because some of you are very quick to accept nonbinary people who look like they're afab/girly/fem but shit on anyone else.

and stop saying "afab nonbinary" and "amab nonbinary" because we all know you're just treating us like "female" and "male" which, yk is the exact opposite of what nonbinary is meant to be.

treat nonbinary people like nonbinary people, nothing else.

[wolfsteax]

[intersexability]

Here’s your friendly reminder that AFAB and AMAB are meaningless and obsolete terms!

[fairycorewalterwhite]

chest binding psa

guys srsly be safe with binding your chest, most binders when bought new come with care instructions specific to the binder and the company but just generally make sure to be careful and if ur currently wearing one just take a moment to reflect and make sure you haven't been wearing it for over about 8 hours (give or take) take it from me, ive nearly broken my ribs while binding and it SUCKS, and while my dysphoria isn't too severe safety should come first, just be aware that binding can go wrong sometime and PLEASE BUY FROM A REPUTABLE COMPANY because if a binder isn't made right it can potentially be more dangerous than a well made binder

[ego-sum-ex-altiora]

As an afab enby person, I’m tired of the reactions I get to growing my hair out. No I’m not detransitioning, and no I’m not “embracing my femininity”. I’m growing my hair out to be more like Jonathan Sims. Nothing else.

[vampb0yz]

i love taller men(i’m 5’3)

[hiiragi7]

I've been seeing quite a lot of discourse lately defining transness as "identifying as a gender opposite to/different from what society expects you to be".

This is incredibly vague, and I feel misses that, for many people like me, there is not exactly a clear gender in which society expects us to be, nevermind a clear "opposite" or "different" gender which we can identify with. Many intersex people have experiences in which one person calls us a "failed male" while another calls us a "DSD female". Many of us have been assigned, reassigned, degendered, reassigned again. In this sense, for many intersex people, it would appear that no matter which gender we are we would fall under this definition of trans if we so choose it; society so often does not expect us to conform to a singular gender, rather they expect us not to exist at all. Even for many intersex people who identify as cisgender, their gender and sex are constantly brought into question and suspected of being inauthentic, an imposter of a different gender/sex "pretending" to be cisgender. In this sense, any gender we choose is "opposite" of expectations, even cisgender identities, because we are intersex.

And yet, the discourse I have been seeing lately has been attempting to sort intersex people into easily digestible and simplified boxes based on AGAB ("AFAB intersex" and "AMAB intersex") and trying to claim what kind of intersex person is allowed to call themselves transfem based on their AGAB, as though this event at birth always determines what gendered expectations are set for you and where you can transition to after.

Which of my gender assignments should I refer to as my "assigned gender"? The choice made by the medical professionals at my birth? The choices made by my parents? At which time? By which parent? And why does it matter to people so much that I have an assigned gender to refer to when it's all so messy anyway? Why must I invent convenient acronyms to describe it to you for your judgement? Why is it not enough simply to say I know my own experiences and identity best and that it's none of your business? Why are you trying to decide for me what I should call myself?

All this to say, I wish people would stop making assumptions about and policing other people's identities. I will readily admit I don't always understand an identity, and this is a good thing; it means there is an infinite variety of us and an infinite amount to learn about each other.

I wrote this post with the recent intersex transfem & afab transfem discourse in mind, but it quite honestly applies to a lot of the very exclusionary and rigid attitudes I've seen in our community lately. Once again, why are we using the actions of oppression (for example, the action of nonconsensual gender assignments; AGAB) to define our trans identities, to the point of excluding each other within our own community? How are we helping each other in doing this?

(I do have similar questions regarding the divide in language between "AFAB transfem" and simply "transfem" - Why specifically the label of "AFAB transfem" rather than just "transfem", if the argument is that AGAB does not determine gender? Personally, I would like to move away from AGAB language altogether.)

I've never had a clear gender to transition from; I only hope that in the future the community will support people like me in using whatever language we find best to describe the gender we are transitioning to.

Trans is a word open to anyone who identifies as such. That's the best part of it.

[uncanny-tranny]

I don't care if somebody was "born a man" or "born a woman"

We were fucking born as babies, I frankly don't care what you were "born to be," so long as you are happy in the here and now. That's what matters more, not this bioessentialist "you're born this way, and nothing you do or say matters more than how you were born"

[aroacesafeplaceforall]

Today’s debate: do I hate my hips because of gender dysphoria or because of the whole “hips = can have children = sex??” Thing?

[underthevveather]

Nonbinary as in, "I was raised with gender, but now I'm pretty much just agnostic."