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lokidjarin-7567 · 21 days ago

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The Prophecy

Viktor x You When the friend of your youth, Viktor, sees you still living in the Undercity, and working in a strip club at that, he is determined to reconnect, and rekindle a childhood friendship that was rooted in something more. Contents: fem!reader, fluff, angst and smut all in one folks, 18+ MDNI, a few physical features described but still reader insert I think (hair colour and freckles), both Viktor and you POVs, long-ass one shot 8.1k words Taglist: @night-fall-moon @zsuzsu321 @sh1zhu @circeinspace @casualjagodek @retrokatz @am-3-thyst @xlittlemissydjx @sseleniaa @thefandomsfervent Hi guys, thanks for bearing with my while I've been working on this one!! I have been absolutely obsessed with this man ever since I finished Arcane, so I just had to write something about him! I also think a lot of people mischaracterise him, so I tried really hard to get his personality right - let me know if I actually have lol. Anyone who knows my works knows how slutty my smut can get lol, but this is actually quite tender so a new one for me too. Anyway, I'll stop waffling now, I hope you enjoy. TTPD Contents | General Masterlist | AO3

DISCLAIMER: while this, in my opinion, is still classified as an ‘x you’ fic, a few physical features are described, namely ‘you’ having burgundy red hair that is, at one point, described as curly and having freckles, alongside a handful of super vague descriptors (eg. fluttering eyelashes, slope of her nose AKA things that can be applied to any and all faces) - basically everyone in the Arcane show has cool hair so I thought this would be a cute detail. It’s possible to ignore if you don’t want to think about have a different hair colour, but if you don’t want to, don’t read it! Almost every comment on this fic has been relating to this which, when I put hours of hard work and effort into something that I was proud of, is insanely demoralising. There has always been a disclaimer in the contents above, but I’m adding it here as well so it’s as clear as possible. Dead dove do not eat and all that. And I’m always open to constructive criticism, but there’s a way to go about it, and a way that will put someone in a slump for months, so please think before you comment! Anyway, not to put a downer before the work, thank you for the reposts and loves so far ❤️

Viktor was lost in thought as he made his way back to Piltover, small tube of Shimmer tucked away in his satchel. He didn’t know what to do. Using it might stabilise the Hexcore, allowing it to keep the plants alive and accomplish everything he and Jayce had been working towards for years, maybe even curing this sickness that had taken over him, or…

Or it could end horribly.

The undercity was as dark and unpleasant as he remembered it. He had never fit in here in his youth - too scrawny, too bookish, and with his leg, he stood no chance. And now was no different.

The neon store signs stood out against the blackened buildings and muddy streets. This part of the city, deep in the underbelly of Zaun, seemed busier than the rest, roads bustling with call girls and salesmen and tourists from Topside taking their pick of unruly establishments. Hundreds of voices layered atop each other in a cacophony of harsh laughter, garish music and argumentative tones. There was barely space to walk, especially with his cane, and he was starting to wonder if this journey was even worth it.

Then something caught his eye. A flash of red, deep and vibrant, moving towards him on the far side of the lane. It was hair, bouncy and curly and his subconscious told him it was shorter than it should’ve been, but it was a colour he knew. Her face wasn’t one he could place at first, but as she got closer, he saw the freckles that smattered across her nose like a constellation, her pink lips that were perpetually curled into a soft frown, her eyes that she always accentuated with brown liner. It was her.

The only friend of his youth. A young girl who used to sit behind the foliage near the water where he tested his inventions. She was shy, even shyer than he used to be, too scared to ask him anything about what he was making for a long time, just watching with curious eyes. But he would never forget the day she moved closer. The way her long, burgundy locks flowed around her, almost touching the floor, the way she was trying her best to be confident, but there was a soft shake in her hand, and a slight stutter as she said hello. Then she produced a small invention of her own - a submarine, the same colour as her hair, designed to float perfectly so the periscope was the only thing that peeked out from the surface.

For years, they were inseparable. She was more artistic than him, always adding a flair to her designs that he didn’t have, so he’d let her ‘improve’ his too. They would play together, and then as they got older, build together, each creation more daring and experimental. And then they started to drift apart. They were in their mid teens when her mother got sick, and she couldn’t make it out as much. Viktor always offered to help, but she refused, not even allowing him to see where she lived. And so, when Professor Heimerdinger found him and offered him an opportunity to be his assistant, he couldn’t even tell her. He left a note, delicately placed under a rock where they would build together, telling her where to find him and how to get in touch, but he never heard anything.

And now here she was. He called out her name softly, not wanting to alarm her in this hostile city, but she didn’t hear. She’d walked past him now, so he turned, following but she was walking fast, faster than he could manage. He called out again, but it wasn’t until then that he noticed the headphones over her ears. She couldn’t hear a thing. He carried on, hoping she would stop but she didn’t. If it was anyone else, he would’ve gone home, given up, but now he’d caught a glimpse of her, he had to see her. To talk to her. To find out why she never got in touch. To apologise for leaving her behind.

She disappeared from view for a moment, and he panicked, thinking he’d lost her again, but he caught a movement out of the corner of his eye, entering an alley beside a row of bars and clubs. He grimaced, following her to see the red locks just moving out of sight again, and a bouncer closing the door behind her. He tried to follow her into the building, but the man stopped him.

“Please…” he asked, out of breath, “it’s an old friend, I need to see her…”

“Staff entrance only, pal. You’ll have to go ‘round the front like everyone else.”

“But… she’s right there… I only need one moment, if she just saw me…” The words died on his lips. Would she even recognise you?

“Don’t make me ask you twice.”

It was dark inside the club, the lights low apart from on the stage and around the bar. It was only mid afternoon, but the place was near full of lowlifes just starting their evenings, sloshing their drinks and talking loudly. The neon from outside carried into this space too, strip lights around the platforms accentuating their presence. There were dancers atop each of them, but he averted his eyes. He shouldn’t have come here. This was so far from his comfort zone, loud and unruly, a long way away from his lab, but he had to see her. He couldn’t let her go again.

He found a stool by the bar, ordering a soda and waiting for her to start her shift. There was no way he could miss her again if he was right here when she started.

And then he saw her at the very edge of his vision, as though his eyes were programmed to search her out in any crowd. She was on stage, cherry red hair glowing in the soft lights, combined with the neon from below making her look like a ghost, ethereal. What was she doing up there?

***

“Afternoon, Joey.” You muttered to the bouncer, and he opened the door for you wordlessly as you slipped off your headphones, replacing your perfectly selected playlist with the sleazy music of the club. Just one of the many reasons you hated working here. You were running late, as per, throwing your things in your locker and quickly changing. Lacing up your shoes always took the longest time, and you barely even had a chance to check yourself in the mirror when you were finished. Your hair looked perfect at least, the naturally burgundy curls sitting at shoulder length. You missed the long hair of your youth, but it become impractical very quickly, and the memories it held… you ended up cutting it all off soon after your mum died. That was when you started working here too. You’d had dreams, of course you did, but growing up in the Undercity made it almost impossible to follow them. There were worse places to work though - for the most part, the patrons were respectful, and everyone who you worked with was kind, but it was still a strip club. At the end of the day, no little girl wanted to be an exotic dancer when they grew up. At least it just about paid the bills.

You had been put on a long shift today - late afternoon until the early hours. You didn’t mind though; it was exhausting, but more time meant more tips. And you needed the money. You were saving, slowly but surely. One day, it would be enough.

These shifts always started slow. Not many tips this early in the day. Not enough drunks - they were all too willing to part with their money, an exploit you knew how to use. After a while on stage, it was your turn to make your way into the crowd. You started away from the bar, smiling at a few, a couple of words of flirtation thrown around, but no one was loose enough for anything else yet. There was something different about the energy today though. You felt… exposed, on display, more than usual. Self conscious in a way you hadn’t been since your first week. By the time you got to the bar, you were already feeling frustrated at the lack of interest. But your favourite coworker was pouring the drinks tonight, and she had one ready for you already.

“Thanks, Katie” You crooned, knocking back the shot quickly and she immediately offered to refill - something you gratefully accepted.

“Thought you might need it. Slow start?”

“Yeah, not the best day so far.” You took your second, thanking her again, when you heard a voice call out your name. Your real name. It made you start, whipping your head around to find the source. You didn’t use that name here. You were expecting to see an ex, or an old boss, but instead you were met with a face you hadn’t seen in years.

His eyes hadn’t changed. Kind but tired, amber in colour and glowing like whiskey in sunlight. The curve of his nose was the same, the curl of his lips, the small moles like points on a map - one beneath his right eye and the other to the left of his lip. There was a cane tucked beside his stool, and he was dressed well. Too well to be in this part of town. A uniform of some sort, something a Topsider would wear: blue shirt accented with a cream ascot and waistcoat. It suited him.

As soon as you saw him, every fond memory of your childhood rushed back to you like a river. The gentleness when he explained his creations to you. His willingness when you asked if you could paint them pretty colours, or add cute designs. The way he held you as you cried about your mum falling ill. How quickly he offered you support, and how quickly you turned him down. You didn’t want to be a burden, but you regretted that choice as soon as he stopped showing up to your usual spot. You kept going for months before you gave up, still trying to find him. The last time you visited was to scatter your mum’s ashes - your stories of Viktor’s designs and the beautiful creek where you tested them out together being one of the last things that brought her comfort.

And now, he was here.

He’d made it out. He’d made it Topside. And you’d only fallen further down.

If there was one person you never wanted to see you like this, it was him. He was the only slither of your youth and innocence left, the only soul in the whole of Runeterra who knew the true version of yourself, the first version of yourself. The version you actually liked. And now, he had to see this. You couldn’t tell what you were feeling. Every emotion was vying for attention: joy, nostalgia, anger, envy…

He repeated your name in a questioning tone, and you realised you’d been staring at him, the rollercoaster of emotions you just went on likely visible on your face.

“Do you know him, darling? Or shall I grab Joe?” Katie asked from behind the bar, staring him down with a protective look. Viktor opened his mouth to speak, indignant look on his face, but you answered for him, never once being able to tear your eyes from him.

“Yeah I… cover for me? If anyone asks, he got a dance.”

“Of course.” Viktor’s gaze had returned you, confused, and you just muttered a ‘come on’, signalling him to follow you, and you lead him across the floor to one of the private rooms. They weren’t exactly the nicest places to talk, the whole room painted a hideous deep purple, a weirdly-shaped black velvet sofa the only thing to sit on. As soon as you closed the door, turning around to see the soft look on his face, every drop of anger seeped from you, replaced with relief. Relief that he was alive. Relief that he had done something with his life. Relief that you hadn’t lost him forever.

You couldn’t help it but let the tears fall as you threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around him tight.

***

He was surprised by her warm welcome. After all these years, he had always imagined she would resent him, but here she was, face pressed to his chest as she hugged him, tears falling onto his shirt. He didn’t even have to think about it, one arm naturally surrounding her as she cried, keeping her close, while the other held firm to his cane, ensuring it was stable for the both of them. He never wanted to let her go again.

She eventually pulled away though, wiping her tears with the shy smile he remembered so well.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to.. on your fancy Topside shirt too.” She laughed nervously, tucking her hair behind her ears. “I… um, I imagined bumping into you one day, finding you again, but I never thought I would be dressed like this.” He finally let himself glance down at her when he said that, to take her in completely, safe in the knowledge that she wasn’t meeting his eyes. She looked beautiful - a black two-peice set, solid silk on the areas that counted, but the frills and accents were a sheer lace, stockings too, glittering beads woven into the delicate material. Even if the environment didn’t suit her, somehow the clothes still did, the same style he’d seen her develop in her teenage years. Simple in colour, beautiful in design - the cunning of her inventor’s mind applied to her other passion.

“What are you doing here, Viktor?” She sat down on the awkward sofa, curling her legs up onto it, and he followed suit, resting his cane against the arm.

“I could ask you the same thing.” It fell from his lips before he could stop it, and he winced, expecting her to be offended, but she just smiled sadly.

“You got out.�� She stated as a shrouded question, ignoring his quip, and he nodded. He could explain, he should, but not yet.

“And you never wrote me.” He responded.

“Write you? Viktor, I didn’t know where you were.” She never got your letter.

“I left you a note by the creek. You never got it?” She shook her head. “I’m so sorry. I should’ve found you somehow, or…”

“It’s ok, Vik.” She shuffled closer on the loveseat, grabbing his hand and squeezing tight. Hearing the name she used to call him sent a pang of pain to his heart. This is what he had been missing out on all these years, all because of a stupid letter. “If I was in your shoes, I’d have done the same. Besides, I never let you see where I lived, or anything else about me. And when mum… I fell off the face of the earth. I wouldn’t have let you in no matter how hard you tried.”

“I’m still sorry.”

“I know.”

***

You spent a long time asking about his life now. He was working in the academy, partners with Piltover’s favourite researcher, helping to create the HexTech that kept the whole city afloat… he had changed the fucking world. And you were… here. Still.

He said your name softly, as though trying to broach a subject carefully and you knew what was coming. You had seen the query floating in his eyes since the moment he saw you.

“What are you doing working here? I mean, you’re brilliant, more so than me, and yet…”

“I’m still stuck in the Lanes?” You sighed.

“Well, yes.” You’d never once thought of him as ignorant. Maybe he’d been living Topside for too long.

“I never got my break. You deserved what you got, of course you did, and you’re the smartest person I know, Viktor, but that doesn’t change the fact that you got lucky. And it’s not the same here as when we were kids. Sure, things weren’t great then, but now… There are no jobs, no money, housing is insanely competitive even though most of it is disgusting.. it’s a vicious cycle meant to keep you in the shitter. This is what I could get. It pays my bills and lets me save a little, the other girls are nice, it’s close to my apartment…”

“But…” You knew from the look on his face what he was going to say - a long speech about how much potential you have, and how much better you could have it. You dropped his hand.

“But what?” You couldn’t help but snap, defensive over the very job that you cursed daily. “But I’m better than selling myself to sleazy drunks? You think I don’t fucking know that? You think I want to be losing my sense of self every day just so I can keep the lights on? You think it’s my dream to feel like I’m a lesser human being because I will let someone pay me to take them into this room and…” You stood up then, starting to pace as silent tears fell. You never let yourself think about any part of your life longer than you had to. Not pondering on it was the only thing keeping you alive.

“You know I wasn’t saying that…”

“I know I’m sorry… I just…”

“I know… I know…” He stood up then too, wrapping you in his arms and letting you cry. Again. You felt so stupid. “I missed you.” He whispered, face nestled into your hair, barely audible.

“I missed you too.” The tender moment didn’t last for long though, as a sharp knock on the door startled you, jumping away from him and wiping your eyes.

“Vikki?” Joey’s voice called out, and you breathed a sigh of relief. “You ok in there?” You put on your smiley voice, cooing back to him.

“Yeah, all good Joe, got a paying customer in here...”

“You got it, doll.” You heard him walk away, and turned back to see Viktor looking at you, head cocked, small smirk playing across his features.

“What?” You asked with a shy smile, wiping away the last of your tears.

“Vikki?” Oh.

“Well I couldn’t exactly use my real name.” He laughed at that, and you couldn’t help but giggle too. “That does mean we’ve been in here too long though, I should…”

“Yeah, no of course…” he moved to open the door, grabbing his cane, but you stopped him quickly, pressing your hand against the door frame.

“One second…” He frowned as you reached towards him, but he didn’t move, just watched curiously as you took your time unknotting his ascot. Once it was off, you unbuttoned a few of his buttons, trying to ruffle his shirt a little, make it look like you had actually been doing your job rather than talking to an old friend. “There…” you muttered quietly, realising he’d shuffled a little closer to you as you worked, and now his lips were only a breath away. He was looking at you so intently, as though there was something he wanted to say, but he never spoke, just gazed at you in a way that made your heart swell. Your hands lingered on his chest, comforted by the warmth and solidness of him. A reassurance that he was real and here. You didn’t want to move.

“Please, don’t go anywhere just yet…” you muttered, the words tumbling from your lips before you could stop them.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

***

She had been backstage for a while now, muttering something about trying to move her shifts around. She came back beaming, and it was infectious, a smile he was trying to fight taking over his own face just at the sight of her.

“Ok, if you’re busy tonight, or you have plans, you can tell me to piss off…”

“Never.” She blushed in response, her wide smile spreading further as she spoke, and he was helplessly drawn to her, eyes scanning her face intently.

“Well, someone came in early for their shift, but someone else is running late… anyway, our schedule is a mess, but good news is I only have to stay for another hour and then I’m free so… I was thinking, maybe you’d want to grab some food and catch up? Unless you have somewhere else to be…” She still sounded so shy, so unsure - the same habit she had when she was young, babbling when she was nervous. He was finding it hard to connect the dots in his mind: the timid person before him now, the girl he used to know, and the dancer on that stage, full of bravado and confidence.

“That sounds wonderful.” The joy in her face was intoxicating, and he watched as relief visibly washed over her body.

“Ok, brilliant.” She spun away for just a moment, trying to track down the bartender she seemed to know well. “Katie, he’s with me, ok? Send him back in like an hour, and his drinks are on my tab.” He tried to protest, but she rested a hand on his shoulder, quickly silencing him. “I insist. It’s the least I can do, considering how long you have to wait around.” Again, he tried to tell her didn’t mind, that he’d wait as long as she needed, anything for her, but she was gone already, slipping into the crowd, his shoulder cold where her hand had been. He sighed, turning back towards the bar on his stool, taking another sip of his soda.

“That’s our Vikki…” Katie mused, slicing a few garnishes behind the bar. “Never accepting that somebody else would want to do something for her.” He let out a dry laugh, half at the name, half in agreement.

“That sounds like her.” A beat of silence passed between them. The club was starting to fill up, but it wasn’t too rowdy yet, and nobody else was at the bar, all relying on bottle service and shot girls instead.

“Drink?” He shook his head politely. “How do you know her?” Katie asked, staying busy but obviously trying to snoop. He didn’t mind. She was a topic he didn’t mind talking about.

“Childhood friend. I haven’t seen her in… a very long time.” Her eyebrow shot up at that.

“What was your name, by the way?”

“Viktor.” A look of surprise flitted across her face.

“Ohh.” She drawled knowingly, smiling at herself as she continued to wedge limes.

“What?”

“I’ve heard of you, that’s all. Her childhood love who disappeared on her while her mother was dying…”

“You don’t know the whole story…” He snapped back quickly. He might hate himself for what happened, but he felt the need to defend his choices. It had turned out well for him, he just wished he could’ve found her. Taken her with him. Their life could’ve been so different. Katie chuckled, continuing her tasks.

“Oh trust me, I do. She’s very quick to defend you, you know. You can do no wrong in her eyes…”

“Not so sure about that…” As he muttered to himself, something she’d said suddenly hit him. Her childhood love…“Actually, on second thought, I will grab a drink please, whatever she usually has. But don’t put it on her tab…”

“I wasn’t planning on it, Topsider.” She saluted mockingly with a smile.

Two down and that was all he was having, just needing something to take the edge off after Katie’s admission. All those years wasted, because you thought childhood love was stupid and pointless. And now, seeing her again, you still love her as much as you did back then…

Katie was on her break, so he twisted in his seat, trying to find her in the crowd. She had never been difficult for him to spot, everything about her so familiar to him, and this time, she was centre stage, which made it even easier. Every part of him was screaming to turn away, to not taint his view of her, but he was instantly transfixed. She danced so fluidly, so gracefully. Every movement she made was purposeful and poised. However much she hated her job, she took pride in it. He was a scientist, sure, but she was a creator, through and through.

***

You were finally finished, and you were exhausted. Even though it wasn’t even half a usual shift, seeing Viktor, all the memories it brought back, it had been so emotionally draining.

You were grateful that the changing area was empty. It wasn’t the usual shift time, and no one ever came here on their break, so at least Viktor wouldn’t have to deal with that. You almost laughed at the thought.

There was a gentle knock, and his voice sent a flutter straight to your heart.

“Vikki?” He called out mockingly, and you laughed at the way he’d latched on to your new name. It was inspired by him, after all. “Are you decent?”

“Yes, you can come in.” You were looking good, if you said so yourself. The fashion and the opportunity you were afforded to express yourself in that way was one of the few things you did like about this place. You’d tried to incorporate the shapes and designs of your ‘work attire’ into a more Lanes-friendly outfit, layering a black organza shirt over the lacy bodice, beading shining through the sheer fabric, pairing it with a bubble skirt and knee high boots, just the right height to allow your stockings to peek from the top. There was only one item that wasn’t black; his neckerchief that you had taken earlier was now around your own collar, tied in a dainty bow. He grinned as soon as he laid his eyes on it, striding towards you and gently holding the hemmed edge between his fingers.

“I guess I’m not getting this back, huh.”

“Never.” He shrugged.

“I’m ok with that.” God, the way he looked at you. It made you melt without fail, warm flush spreading across your cheeks.

“Are you ready to go?” You muttered, eyes still glued to his, honey tones making you feel as though you were stuck in them. A fly trapped in amber, resigned to its fate.

“I’m ready when you are.”

You’d decided you were going to cook for him tonight instead of taking him out. The places near you either weren’t nice enough, or they knew you for the wrong reasons. Besides, you wanted to show him your place. To show him that, even though you were still here, you had done everything you could to make the best of it, to continue learning and inventing and developing yourself.

That did mean you had to stop by the store, though. Which meant bumping into Angel. He and Viktor would not get on.

You had grabbed Viktor’s arm as soon as you left the club, a habit from the times Joey had walked you home, knowing that you were safer beside a man than by yourself. Even though the Undercity was bustling tonight, there was something so soothing about being here with him. A nostalgia warming you from the inside out. He let you guide him into the shop below your apartment, chatting absentmindedly about nothing and everything, when a smooth voice stopped yoou in your tracks.

“Not so fast, Vikki…” You groaned, turning back the few steps you had made into the entrance.

“Hey Angel.” You cooed, although it felt wrong falling into your usual flirtatious routine when Viktor was right behind you. He was working behind the counter today, thumbing through the till. His long dreadlocks were down, grey peeking through his beard, wide grin as his eyes traced over you, following your arm to where it joined the man next to you.

“Is that a nickname, or…” Viktor muttered, and you couldn’t help but laugh as you responded.

“No, Vik, this is my landlord Angel…”

“Landlord, huh? Thought I was more than that, sugar…” He leaned across the counter, shit-eating smile on his face, clearing noticing and enjoying the fact he was winding up your new companion. Viktor scowled, moving a step closer to you.

“Yeah, yeah, keep dreaming, old man…” You sent him a wink, and he laughed, the booming noise of it always making you smile. “What have you got in that’s fresh? I’m actually cooking tonight…”

You chatted a little longer, grabbing what Angel recommended and some wine, before heading upstairs via the back of the shop. Viktor was still scowling slightly as you were unlocking your door, and you laughed lightly, nudging him with the bag of shopping.

“What?” He huffed.

“I don’t like that guy.” He grumbled, feeling smug that you had called it.

“He’s my landlord, Vik, and a friend. He’s a good guy, don’t worry.” He just shrugged as you finally got the door open, and you thanked the stars that you had remembered to tidy last night, or else it would be a complete tip. There were still remnants from your busy morning scattered all around the studio: scrap pieces of fabric and thread strewn across the kitchen table, the half-finished neglige you were constructing laid over the back of one of the chairs, the cogs and pieces of machinery lie abandoned next to your sewing machine in the wake of the modifications you were trying to make so it could handle more delicate material. The space itself was dark in colour, olive and navy washing the walls, brown leather sofa and black countertops marking their territory in the small apartment, the stain-glass screen in front of your bed the only splash of jewel toned colour. You could feel Viktor’s curiosity at the place, and as he stepped further into it, a smile settled onto his lips.

“It’s so very�� you.” He said, and in any other intonation, it would’ve sounded like a bad thing, but when he said it, full of adoration.. it was a compliment of the highest order.

***

She was mesmerising as she cooked, twirling in the kitchen to her carefully selected vinyl, a wide smile on her face as she tested what she was making. He wanted to help but she wouldn’t let him, batting him away and telling him to sit down, and for now, he had obliged. But, as much as he wanted to help her always, right now, he just wanted to be close.

“At least let me pour the wine?” He said, already standing to help, and she huffed, but didn't object. Instead, she handed him the corkscrew and the bottle wordlessly. He smiled, leaning against the counter and continuing to watch her as she stirred. She was always so chaotic when she was creating, something evidenced by the near bomb-site on her kitchen table. It was just so… her. Everything about her apartment was as well, such a perfect and beautiful representation of everything she was, every tiny detail of her life and personality reflected in the space she lived in. The colours, the soft furnishings, the bookshelves lining the wall behind her bed. Then, he noticed something about the stain glass screen that separated the room, soft light from her bedside lamp washing through it and creating a blue ripple across the floor like a stream. It was of their place, their creek. It was abstract, sure, but he would recognise it anywhere. The way certain rocks jutted out, the colours of it all, the small boat floating in the still glass water.

“Did you make that?” He asked earnestly, and she briefly glanced up from the stove to see what he was looking at.

“Yeah, I've been trying out a lot of different hobbies actually, things to keep me busy when I’m not working. That was one of my favourites…”

“It’s beautiful.” She smiled sadly, focusing her attention back to the pan.

“It reminds me of you.”

He poured them both a glass, and she gratefully accepted.

“It’s nearly finished, just a few more… oh I meant to ask earlier…” Her mind was such a beautiful thing, the speed at which it moved so captivating, not even time to finish her own thought before starting another, “why were you even here today? In the Undercity, in my club… I just never thought I’d see you back here by choice.”

“I was visiting an old friend, a quandary about a new gadget Jayce and I are working on, but…” He was going to say something about it, ask her opinion on whether he should follow Doctor Reveck’s advice, what he should do next, but he decided against it. “He didn’t have any insights.”

“Maybe I can help?”

“No, I…” She looked hurt at the speed the word left his mouth, almost recoiling and turning back to her cooking with a frown. “I mean that you probably could, but I don’t want to taint tonight by talking about a project that has been frustrating me for weeks. Another time though, of course I would appreciate your insight.” She sighed in relief, smile flitting back across her face. She grabbed a spoon from the drawer, humming as she did, a flurry of breathtaking movement as she dipped it into the sauce, spinning back around and holding it up to him.

“Taste?” She asked, the look on her face so hopeful it melted him, her joy infectious. But underneath all of it, he couldn't help but notice the cracks: the bags under her eyes, the tiredness set into them, the subtle shake of her hand. But he just smiled, enveloping her hand in his and bringing the spoon to his lips.

“It’s perfect.”

“I’m not sure I’d go that far.” She looked proud nonetheless, spinning back away from him and he was left to watch again, heart swelling. He wanted this. Cooking with her, drinking wine in the kitchen to her favourite record, letting her order him around. He wanted the… intimacy of it. The domesticity. The realisation of it ached. You could’ve had this. All these years without her, all these years wasted. Precious time that you no longer have to spare. If you’d have just waited, just taken more time to find her, insisted on helping her even…

“It’s ready!” She exclaimed, presenting a plate with a wide grin, and every stress, every regret simultaneously melted away and intensified, a pit forming in his stomach.

“It looks wonderful.”

***

You had eaten, and you were both now on your second glass of wine. You felt closer to him with every single second, drawn to every word he said like moth to a flame. At some point in the evening, you’d moved to the floor, backs to the sofa, as you looked through some of your old sketches you had found. The conversation lulled momentarily, a faraway look in his eyes, and you realised how close you had gotten. Your elbow was leaning on the sofa, supporting your head with your body twisted to face him, knee pressing against his thigh. You moved your head forwards to glance at the sketchbook, and your hand fell, resting on his shoulder. A stillness fell over him at the touch, and he smiled sadly to himself.

“I think you should come back with me.” He stated with finality, and you froze.

“What do you…”

“I think you should come back to Piltover.” He closed the book, placing it gently on the low coffee table. He was serious. “Help Jayce and I with our projects. Let me teach you about HexTech.”

“Vik, I don’t exactly have any actual experience. I don’t have an education. I can’t afford to live Topside…”

“You can live with me.” He said it so simply, like it was so obvious. Of course you would love that. Now you’d seen him again, you didn’t want to be apart from him but… “Professor Heimerdinger can give you lessons, but you have the mind already. There are certain things that can’t be taught. You have the passion, the skill, the creativity…”

“But…” You weren’t trying to pick apart his plan, but it felt terrifying. Even though it was everything you had ever wanted, it felt so far fetched. Like a fever dream. It didn’t feel like your life, your future.

“No, I… I lost you once, I can’t do it again.”

“Vik…” He grabbed your hand that was resting by his shoulder, and you felt yourself relax into his touch. He turned head to meet your eyes, sadness creeping into them.

“I don’t have much time left.” The finality of his statement shocked you, and you couldn’t tell what he was talking about. Did he have somewhere else to be? Oh god, you’d already kept him here too long…

“What do you mean, time left?”

“I’m dying.” It felt like somebody had punched you in the gut, all the air in your lungs gone.

“You’re…”

“Dying.” He repeated factually, and your heart sank further into your stomach. “And if we don’t… Jayce and I are working on something that might help, but if it doesn’t, I need someone I trust to take over from me.”

“Viktor, hold on, I need to think…” Your mind was racing, and you still couldn’t quite wrap your head around everything, hands running through your hair. He was dying. He wanted you to move Topside. He wanted you to work with him. To take over his life’s work. “It’s been years. I haven’t seen you in years and now you want me to… now you trust me to…”

“Of course.” He muttered, speaking your name softly to get your attention, hand gently wiping your face where tears had fallen without you noticing. “You’re everything to me, you always have been. There’s nothing I wouldn’t trust you with.” His hand was still resting on your face, and as you searched his eyes, you saw something else. Something pleading, something that echoed the feeling bouncing around in your heart. It would be hard. It would take a long time to settle in, to learn the ropes, to feel like you belonged. But it was your dream. To help change the world. And if he didn't have long, there was no chance you were wasting any of your time left with him.

“Ok.” You answered nodding, and you watched a smile take over his face, heart swelling at the sight.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah… Vik, you’re offering me my dreams on a silver platter, and on top of it all, I get to be…” You nearly slipped, about to say be with you but you knew that was a lot. That you had only just reunited and to spring the whole I’ve loved you since I was 10 and I’ve never loved a soul since thing on him might ruin the dream that he’s just given you. But, fuck, you wanted to kiss him right now. “I get to work with you again.. there would have to be one hell of a catch for me to say no to that.”

“The whole dying thing isn’t too much of a problem then?” He asked with a slight smile, trying to hide a genuine fear beneath a joke.

“Oh, honey, knowing that we don’t have another decade of time to lose… I’m not letting you slip through my fingers this time.” His hand felt so natural resting against your cheek you’d forgotten it was there until it moved to cup the base of your neck, thumb drawing gentle lines across your jaw. His amber eyes were searching your features, looking for anything to indicate that you were unsure, but your resolve shone through, and you could see the moment he realised this was going to work, relief flooding through them.

Then, before you could process what was happening, his hand gently guided you forward until your lips brushed against his—light as a feather. For a moment, you couldn't believe he had just kissed you, that it was real. But as you met those pleading honey eyes, everything else faded away. Every doubt, every regret, every sliver of worry vanished, replaced by such overwhelming care and love that you felt you might burst. Your body gave in without conscious thought, melting into his arms as you kissed him. His hands drifted to the back of your head, tangling in your hair and pulling you closer. You couldn't get close enough, your hands gripping the front of his shirt. His fingers traced down your body until they reached your hips, pulling you over him. A soft giggle escaped into his mouth as you swung your leg over his, settling onto his lap. When he finally broke for breath, you found yourself chasing his lips, panting into the space between you with a wide smile.

His lips found yours again, this time with more urgency, more need. Your hands slid up his chest to his shoulders, steadying yourself as his grip on your hips tightened. The feeling of his fingers pressing into your skin sent shivers down your spine, and you couldn't help but let out a soft moan into his mouth. He smiled against your lips, one hand moving to cup your face while the other remained firmly at your waist.

"I've wanted this for so long," he whispered against your mouth, voice rough with emotion. You could only nod in response, too overwhelmed by the feeling of finally being in his arms after all these years.

The record had long since stopped playing, leaving only the sound of your shared breaths and racing hearts in the quiet apartment. His thumb traced gentle circles on your cheek as he pulled back just enough to look into your eyes, full of warmth and something deeper, something that had been there all along. Something that you had been too blinded by insecurity to notice earlier. Something that you knew all too well, reflected in your own heart. You pressed your lips to the mole on his cheek, and the one beside his mouth, a small smirk playing across his features as you did.

“I still can’t quite believe this is happening.” You muttered softly against his cheek, and he sighed, thumb dancing across your lips.

You eventually found yourselves entwined on your bed, limbs tangled in soft cotton sheets, his back pressed firmly against your sturdy wooden headboard as you rocked into him with gentle, deliberate movements. Each subtle shift of your hips sent waves of pleasure coursing through your body, making your breath catch. You panted softly into his mouth as his strong, careful hands helped guide your every motion, his touch both grounding and electrifying. The overwhelming need to be closer drove you to pull him tighter against you, your arms wrapping securely around his shoulders until there wasn't even a whisper of space between your bodies. Your chest pressed firmly to his, feeling his rapid heartbeat matching yours, as your head naturally found its place in the crook of his neck. You pressed feather-light kisses against the sensitive skin, tasting the salt and breathing in his familiar scent. The intimacy of the moment was almost overwhelming - so intense, so raw, so perfectly natural - and you found yourself climbing toward your peak faster than you ever had before, your body responding to his every touch as if it had been waiting for this moment forever. You whined softly into his skin as pleasure built within you, each movement bliss, and he responded with a groan as he pressed his lips tenderly to your temple.

"That feels so good, sweetheart," he drawled, his voice coarse with desire, and your hips instinctively bucked harder against him, drawing a sharp gasp from both of you. His meticulous fingers traced teasing patterns across your hipbones before finding their way between your bodies, circling your sensitive clit with perfectly measured pressure that made your toes curl. His other hand gently cupped your chin, drawing you back until your eyes met his, gilded with desire but still so full of tenderness. His lips ghosted across yours before he pressed his forehead to your own, releasing your face and returning his hand to your hip, guiding you once more. You could feel yourself fluttering around him as your pleasure built to an almost unbearable peak, and his eyes rolled back, a broken groan escaping his lips and filling the charged space between you. The coil of pleasure wound tighter and tighter as you approached your climax, desperately seeking more of him, claiming his mouth in a deep, passionate kiss that swallowed the stream of desperate moans spilling from both your lips. When your release finally crashed over you, it was like nothing you'd ever experienced - all the pressure, all the built-up desperation exploded like a supernova and pure, white-hot ecstasy consumed every nerve ending, every thought, every sensation except the feeling of him inside you and against you. He followed shortly after, gasping your name like a prayer against your skin as his own pleasure overtook him, his lips finding purchase on your neck as he shuddered through his release. In that moment, it was perfection, hearing him, feeling him, everything you had ever dreamed of and more. But as you came down from your shared bliss, you couldn't quite silence the intruding thought lurking at the edges of your consciousness - that you wouldn’t have him for long.

***

She looked so peaceful curled against him, her head nestled perfectly in the crook of his chest as if she belonged there, her beautiful red hair fanning out like a fiery halo in the dim light. Her beauty was staggering - the gentle slope of her nose, the delicate arch of her brows, the soft curve of her lips - and he couldn't help but trace each feature with his fingertips, mapping the geography of her face with tender precision. She sighed contentedly in her sleep at his touch, unconsciously pressing closer to him, one hand curling loosely in the fabric of his sheets that lay across them. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this complete, this profoundly at peace, as if all the jagged pieces of his life had suddenly aligned. His fingers continued their gentle exploration, committing every detail to memory - the light dusting of freckles across her nose, the subtle flutter of her eyelashes, the way her lips curved slightly downwards even in sleep. He wanted to capture this moment, to carry it with him always like a talisman, a protection. A reminder that he would do anything to preserve her peace of mind. To make her happy.

The soft amber from the bedside lamp caught in her hair and painted her skin in warm honey tones, making her look almost otherworldly in her beauty, an ethereal being who had chosen, inexplicably, to be with him. He pressed his lips to her forehead in a feather-light kiss, breathing in the familiar scent of her hair, before letting his own eyes drift closed. Despite everything - the illness creeping through his veins, the uncertainty that clouded their future like a torrential storm on the horizon - right now, everything felt exactly as it should be.

#viktor x f!reader #viktor x reader #viktor arcane #fanfic #fanfiction #viktor fanfic #viktor x you #viktor smut #viktor angst #viktor fluff #one shot #arcane #arcane season 1 #glorious evolution #childhood friends to lovers #ttpd #the prophecy

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reidmarieprentiss · 3 months ago

Text

Lost in Translation: Prologue

Summary: A college student (reader) forms a deep bond with a young professor, Spencer Reid, over weekly study sessions in the library. After months of building a friendship, they share a night together, only for the student to be left alone, Spencer gone without a word.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Category: fluff, angst, backstory, mild smut (18+)

Warnings/Includes: non-descriptive smut (18+), talks of sex, alcohol, professor/student relationship (but it's Spencer and he's 18 like his students), being used for sex, loss of virginity, (un)requited feelings, no happy ending for this part

Word count: 8.6k

a/n: new story just dropped lol -- wrote so fucking fast and not edited at all sorryyyy

main masterlist part one part two part three part four

Being a wonder kid, Spencer Reid’s youth was one of isolation. Growing up too young, too smart, too awkward—too everything to really fit in—made life difficult. He navigated a world where his intelligence placed him far beyond his peers, yet his age kept him at arm’s length from those who might understand him better. It wasn’t until he began teaching an engineering course while working on his PhD at eighteen that he finally felt a flicker of that belonging.

Standing in front of an auditorium full of undergraduates, Spencer finally experienced something akin to acceptance. The students, many only a few years older than him, loved the fresh, youthful energy he brought to their 8 a.m. class. For the first time, they weren’t learning from a middle-aged professor droning on about equations but from someone who felt like one of them. Spencer’s lectures were passionate, and he brought concepts to life in ways that made the subject not only digestible but genuinely fun.

It didn't hurt that he was handsome either; that soft hair, those gentle brown eyes framed by glasses, and the earnest way he smiled—all of it made more than a few students swoon over him at one point or another. Spencer, of course, remained oblivious to the dreamy stares and flirtatious comments.

Despite his newfound sense of belonging in the classroom, Spencer didn’t really hang out with anyone. He remained somewhat of an enigma—attending his own study groups, tutoring off and on, and sometimes grabbing lunch with faculty who treated him more like an adorable novelty than a colleague. He was used to it by then, that feeling of floating in between worlds.

But one day, after a particularly engaging lecture on applied mechanics, a student named Jasper approached him. Jasper was bold, with a confident walk and a grin that suggested they weren’t afraid to push boundaries. “Hey, Professor Reid,” they said casually, leaning against the edge of the lecture podium.

“Oh, uh, hi,” Spencer replied, caught slightly off guard as he scrambled to gather his things. He was never quite sure how to handle the one-on-one interactions with students that felt too friendly, too casual. “Did you have a question about the lecture?”

Jasper laughed and shook their head. “No, actually, I was just thinking... Me and my roommates are throwing a party this weekend, and I was wondering if you’d wanna come? You know, kick back, meet some people... No physics or equations, promise.”

Spencer blinked, processing the invitation like a computer struggling to boot up. A party? With students? It felt... like an odd concept, but one that piqued his interest in a way nothing had before. He’d never really had a social invitation like this—especially not one involving people close to his own age. The idea was exhilarating, and for a moment, Spencer could almost feel what it might be like to be just another young adult, rather than the kid-genius-teacher everyone knew him as.

“Really?” Spencer’s eyes lit up, his grin boyish and genuine. “That sounds great, actually! Should I, um... should I bring anything? Snacks? Drinks? I can... figure something out.”

Jasper shook their head, laughter spilling out at how adorably sincere he was being. “No, no, don’t worry about it,” they said, waving off his concern. “Just bring yourself, cutie.” With a teasing wink and a quick flick of their wrist, they slipped a small note with their address into Spencer’s hands. And then, with that same confident stride, Jasper turned and walked away, leaving Spencer to stand there, flushed and stunned, staring down at the address in his palm like it was some secret code to a new world he’d been waiting forever to explore.

—

Spencer stood outside the house, his nerves and excitement mingling as he took in the scene. The address Jasper had given him led him to a lively place: music thumping loudly enough to rattle the windows, laughter spilling out through the open front door, and the warm glow of lights casting playful shadows on the lawn. People were milling around everywhere—huddled in small circles, raising drinks to one another, dancing, and talking loudly over the music. It was the kind of scene Spencer had seen in movies but never really experienced in real life.

Taking a deep breath, he steeled his nerves and stepped inside. He immediately felt out of place in his neat button-down shirt and slacks, compared to the casual party attire of those around him. But he was here, and he was determined to enjoy it. As he made his way through the crowded entryway, Spencer's eyes were wide, absorbing every detail—the smell of popcorn and alcohol mixing in the air, the flashing lights, the loud music, and the laughter. He weaved through groups of students, dodging stray elbows and trying to make eye contact with anyone who might seem familiar.

However, after a few failed attempts at small talk and realizing that almost everyone he knew was either preoccupied or didn’t recognize him outside the classroom setting, Spencer’s excitement dimmed a bit. He found himself gravitating towards a quieter corner of the living room, eventually sinking into the soft, worn leather of a couch, trying to look relaxed but not too out of place. He sat there, half-heartedly holding a cup of soda someone had pressed into his hand earlier, unsure of what to do next. Every now and then, a familiar face would pass by, and he’d offer a polite wave or smile, but nothing stuck.

The longer he sat, the more he felt like an observer looking through glass, disconnected from the easy laughter and carefree movements around him. He sighed inwardly, wondering if coming to this party was such a great idea after all. But as he settled back into his seat, he heard an enthusiastic voice shout above the noise.

“Professor Reid!”

He barely had time to look up before Jasper dropped down beside him on the couch, their presence as warm and electrifying as a flash of lightning. They were so close that the entire side of their body pressed against Spencer's, hip to shoulder, the sudden contact sending a warm jolt through his skin. Spencer’s eyes widened in surprise, and he couldn't help the slight smile that pulled at the corner of his lips.

“Hey!” he greeted, his voice louder than usual to be heard over the music but still tinged with that inherent awkwardness that never quite left him in social situations. He noticed the slight flush in Jasper’s cheeks, their eyes bright and relaxed from the party vibe.

“I thought you were gonna be a no-show,” Jasper teased, leaning in so that their mouth was close to Spencer's ear, their voice buzzing through him. “You seemed kinda nervous when I invited you.”

“N-no, not at all!” Spencer said quickly, though his laugh betrayed his nerves. “I was... just... you know, trying to, uh, soak it all in.”

“Well,” Jasper drawled, dragging out the word like they were savoring it, “now that you're here, we should make sure you have a good time. Can’t have my favorite professor looking all lonely in the corner.” They flashed him that teasing smile, the one that Spencer had come to recognize as Jasper's signature charm, and for a moment, Spencer forgot about the crowded room and the strangers dancing around him.

“Yeah,” he nodded, feeling a bit more relaxed, the warmth from Jasper’s touch making the party seem a little less intimidating. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

That night, Spencer had no idea how things would unfold. What started as casual chatter on that couch quickly transformed into something more charged, more intimate. Jasper had a way of making Spencer feel seen—really seen—and as they talked, leaning into each other, the lines between conversation and flirtation blurred until they no longer existed at all. Eventually, the touches grew longer, more intentional, and Spencer felt his breath catch when Jasper’s fingers brushed against the back of his neck, pulling him closer until their lips finally met.

It was Spencer’s first kiss, and it was exhilarating and nerve-wracking all at once. He was clumsy at first, feeling every ounce of his inexperience and fearing that he was doing everything wrong. But Jasper was patient, guiding him with slow, teasing movements until Spencer’s hesitations melted into something fervent and desperate. They broke apart, breathless and flushed, and before he knew it, Jasper was pulling him up, leading him through the crowded party, down a narrow hallway, and into a bedroom.

There, it happened—the fumbling of clothes, the whispered instructions and reassurances. Spencer's heart pounded in his chest, the nerves and adrenaline mixing with a primal kind of desire he’d never felt before. Jasper seemed to know exactly what they were doing, leading and coaxing Spencer through the motions, and for once, he wasn’t overthinking, wasn’t caught in the spiral of his own mind. He let go, lost in the sensations of touch, taste, and pleasure as he experienced intimacy for the first time.

When it was over, Spencer lay on his back, panting, feeling a mix of awe and disbelief wash over him. He was almost scared to speak, to ask what this all meant. But before he could say anything, Jasper sat up and smiled, giving Spencer a quick, almost dismissive pat on the arm.

“That was fun, Professor,” Jasper said with a playful grin that lacked the intimacy they'd shared moments before. “But I’m gonna get some sleep now. Thanks for, you know, joining in on the fun tonight.”

Spencer sat up, a little dazed and trying to process the sudden shift. He nodded, feeling a strange lump in his throat, and muttered a soft, “Yeah, sure. Thanks... for inviting me.” There was no animosity in Jasper’s tone, but it was clear the night had come to its end. Spencer gathered his clothes, dressed quickly, and slipped out of the room, his head spinning with a thousand thoughts. He walked through the party once more, though he felt almost invisible now, slipping out the front door into the cool night air.

The next class was excruciatingly awkward for Spencer. He’d gone over the lecture material several times, but nothing could prepare him for the moment when Jasper walked in, took a seat right in the middle of the room, and gave him an easy smile like nothing had happened. Spencer struggled to maintain eye contact and found himself stumbling over his words more than usual. He felt exposed, raw, like everyone in that room somehow knew what had happened between them.

But Jasper was unbothered, unfazed—completely casual. It was as if that night was just another blip on their radar, a moment to be shared and then forgotten. And perhaps that was the point. As the days went on, Spencer realized that to Jasper, and probably to many others, it was just another night—no strings, no lingering feelings, just a moment of pleasure and then moving on.

The realization was strange for Spencer. He couldn't help but question if that was just what sex was—casual, meaningless, but a great way to blow off steam. It felt anticlimactic to think that something so intimate was treated so carelessly, but maybe that was the reality. For all his intellect, this was an area Spencer had little experience in, and he found himself trying to adjust to this new perspective. Maybe this was just the way people did things, and maybe that night with Jasper was simply the start of understanding what it meant to live a life that wasn’t dictated by equations or theories, but by messy, imperfect human experiences.

—

The library was packed with students hunched over textbooks, fingers flying across keyboards, and whispered conversations about study guides. You were already on edge, the stress of your final exam making every little noise seem louder, every empty table harder to find. You hugged your books to your chest, eyes darting around for any free spot, your mind already buried in the formulas and concepts you needed to cram before tomorrow.

Then, without warning, you collided with a solid body as you turned a corner. Your books tumbled out of your grip, scattering across the polished floor. “Shit!” you blurted out, the curse escaping before you could hold it back. “Sorry!” You dropped down immediately to pick up your books, your face burning with embarrassment.

Just as you did, so did the person you’d run into, and the next thing you knew, there was a dull thud as your foreheads collided with a painful smack. You jerked back, clutching your head, eyes watering from the sudden sharp sting.

“Ow,” the guy groaned, rubbing his forehead. He winced, but there was a hint of a laugh behind the pain, a softness in his voice that made your embarrassment double.

“Fuck, my bad,” you stammered, feeling utterly mortified. “I’m so clumsy.”

The guy chuckled lightly, standing back up as he brushed off his pants. “Me too, it’s alright,” he said. As you looked up, you finally saw who you’d bumped into.

It was him. Professor Reid—the young genius who everyone in your classes seemed to talk about, with rumors that swirled around him like leaves in a storm. The eighteen-year-old PhD who made engineering sound sexy, apparently both in his lectures and in the beds of the more... adventurous students. You’d heard more than one friend gush about how he'd helped them understand a complicated theory in more ways than one, their whispers tinged with admiration and amusement.

And now here he was, standing right in front of you, all tousled curls, warm hazel eyes, and that slightly awkward but undeniably charming smile. The closeness made you realize how tall he was, his lean frame towering over you. You felt a rush of heat creep down your neck, spreading across your skin like wildfire. You’d seen him from afar, of course—catching glimpses of him in lecture halls or around campus—but never up close like this, and he was... so much prettier than you’d expected.

“Are... are you okay?” Professor Reid asked, still rubbing his head but looking at you with a concern that made your stomach flip. He leaned down, grabbing the books you'd dropped before handing them to you, his fingers brushing against yours briefly.

“Y-yeah, I’m fine,” you mumbled, gripping your books tightly, trying to ignore the fact that your hand was now tingling where he’d touched it. “I just... wasn’t looking where I was going.”

“Neither was I,” he admitted, his smile widening a little as he looked at you, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “I guess we're both guilty.”

“Yeah, guess so,” you said, forcing a laugh. God, why was it so hard to speak right now? You mentally cursed yourself for being so flustered. You quickly glanced around, realizing that most of the tables were still full, and suddenly it dawned on you that there were no available places to sit... except for the table behind him.

“Um... do you—do you mind if I sit here?” you asked, gesturing to the table he’d just been standing beside.

He hesitated for a moment, glancing back at the table and then at you, a strange look crossing his face like he was trying to figure something out. Then, with that same awkward but genuine smile, he nodded. “Yeah, of course. It's all yours.”

You thanked him quietly, moving to the chair and settling down, but as you did, you couldn't help but steal another glance at him—those curls falling just right, his long fingers thumbing through his notes as he lingered nearby. And as you opened your books, pretending to focus on studying, you couldn't stop sneaking glances at the very attractive, young professor.

The hour that followed was filled with the gentle rustle of pages turning, pens scratching against paper, and the occasional cough or whisper from other students scattered around the library. But you couldn’t concentrate, not really. Your eyes kept drifting up from your notes to the table across from you, where Professor Reid sat hunched over his books, his focus so intense that you wondered what on earth he could be doing. Every now and then, your gazes would accidentally meet, and you’d look away quickly, your cheeks heating up as if you'd been caught doing something wrong.

You were in the middle of re-reading the same paragraph for the fifth time when you heard his voice break the silence between you. “If you don’t mind me asking,” he began, the soft tone of his voice instantly grabbing your attention, “what course are you studying for?”

Your eyes shot up to meet his, and for a moment, all you could do was blink at him. He was looking at you curiously, genuinely interested, and his expression was kind, almost encouraging. You tucked a stray hair behind your ear and cleared your throat, trying not to let your voice shake as you replied, “Oh, uh, architecture. I’m studying for an exam... final one of the semester.”

“Architecture!” Spencer’s face lit up, and he leaned forward slightly, his eyes sparkling with excitement. It was like you’d just told him the most fascinating thing in the world, and you couldn’t help but smile at the way he seemed so genuinely enthusiastic. “That’s great! I’ve always thought architecture was such a beautiful blend of art and science—it’s like engineering for the soul, you know? There’s so much math involved, but it’s all to create something tangible, something that can change the way people experience space. And the way architecture has evolved over time? It’s like a living timeline of human innovation!”

He continued to ramble, moving from modern skyscrapers to the ancient marvels of Rome, describing the symmetry of cathedrals and the beauty of brutalism. The passion in his voice made every word seem like a story, and you sat there, leaning your chin on your hand, utterly captivated by the way he spoke. It was clear he loved to share knowledge, to connect different ideas, to see how everything fit together like pieces of a puzzle.

You found yourself smiling wider and wider, nodding along as he spoke, absorbing everything he said not because you needed to know it for your exam, but because he made it all sound so alive.

“Sorry,” he said suddenly, laughing softly as he realized he’d been talking nonstop for quite a while. He leaned back in his chair, a slight flush in his cheeks. “I tend to... ramble a bit. Especially when it’s something interesting. I hope I’m not distracting you.”

“Not at all,” you assured him quickly, shaking your head. “Actually... I liked listening to you.”

He seemed surprised by that, his eyebrows raising slightly. “Really?”

“Yeah,” you said, meeting his eyes and offering a shy smile. “You, um... you make it all sound really exciting. It’s nice.”

“Oh, I’m glad,” Spencer smiled, a genuine, soft smile that made the corners of his eyes crinkle. For a moment, there was a comfortable silence, the kind that lingered like a shared secret. You wanted to say more, to keep the conversation going, to ask him about the things he was passionate about. But before you could find the right words, Spencer glanced down at his watch and began gathering his books.

“I, uh, should get going,” he said, a slight note of regret in his voice. “Lots of things to prepare for—classes and, um... you know, life things.” He gave an awkward laugh, and slung his bag over his shoulder, pausing for a moment as if he were about to say something else, but then just smiled instead. “It was really nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, you too,” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady and casual, despite the fact that your heart was pounding harder than it should have been. He nodded, gave you one last shy smile, and turned to leave, weaving through the tables and shelves of books until he disappeared from view.

You watched him go, the way he held himself with that slight awkwardness, his long stride taking him quickly out of the library. And as soon as he was gone, you slumped back in your chair, letting out a breath.

For a fleeting moment, you felt hopeful that you might run into him again, that maybe you’d have another one of those conversations that felt easy and exciting all at once. But then you remembered the stories—the whispers about how Professor Reid often slept with students, how it was no big deal to him, just casual fun. And suddenly, you felt foolish for reading anything more into his friendliness. What if he’d only started talking to you because he was trying to woo you into bed?

You couldn’t deny that he was attractive—very attractive—but if all he saw in you was another potential fling, then maybe it was better not to get your hopes up. After all, Spencer Reid wasn’t like other guys. He was brilliant, handsome, and, from what you’d heard, had more than his share of admirers. You shook your head, trying to brush away the pang of disappointment and return your focus to your notes.

Still, no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t quite shake the image of his warm smile or the sound of his voice. And a part of you—just a small part—hoped that maybe, just maybe, there was more to Spencer Reid than the rumors said.

—

You were rushing, nerves jangling through your body like alarm bells. You were running late—really late—and all you could think about was getting to your exam on time. In your panic, you didn’t see the corner coming, your eyes glued to your watch as you cursed yourself for oversleeping. You rounded the bend with way too much speed, and before you could react, you collided hard into someone else. The force knocked you off balance, sending you sprawling to the ground, your books and papers flying in a wild scatter across the floor.

“Oh my!” came a startled voice. “I am so, so sorry, I was just looking for—oh, hi.”

You winced as you propped yourself up on your elbows, but the moment you looked up, your heart sank and soared all at once. There, standing over you, was none other than Professor Reid. He was staring down at you with wide eyes, his expression a mixture of surprise and concern, and his mouth opened as if he wasn't sure whether to apologize or help you up first.

“Oh my God,” you muttered under your breath, scrambling to get back up, your face flushing hot. “I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going, I just—”

“No, no, please, don’t apologize,” Spencer said quickly, his voice soft but urgent as he bent down to your level. “That was my fault, I wasn’t paying attention either.” He reached out to help you up, his hands gentle as he grasped your arm and steadied you, making sure you didn’t trip over yourself as you stood. “Are you okay?” he asked, eyes darting over you to make sure you weren’t hurt. “I didn’t, um... hurt you or anything, did I?”

“No, I’m fine, really,” you said, though you could feel your whole body tingling from where he touched you, the warmth of his hand lingering even as he let go. You brushed off your pants, trying to regain any semblance of composure despite the fact that you were now not only late but completely flustered.

Spencer began gathering your scattered books and papers, handing them to you with the same focused attention he gave to everything else. He was quick, efficient, but still careful, making sure to line up the pages neatly before passing them back into your hands. “Here you go,” he said, smiling sheepishly. “You, um... dropped a few things.”

“Thanks,” you mumbled, taking the books from him and clutching them to your chest. And then you remembered. “Oh my God, my exam!” You looked at your watch again, the numbers glaring back at you as if taunting your lateness. “I... I have to go, I’m so sorry, Professor Reid, but I really need to—”

“Wait, wait,” Spencer interrupted, a spark of understanding lighting up his eyes. “Is it in the main lecture hall? The big one across campus?”

“Yeah,” you nodded frantically. “I have, like, five minutes to get there or I'm screwed.”

“Then we’d better hurry,” he said, a determined smile breaking across his face. “Come on, I’ll walk with you.”

“Y-you don’t have to do that, I mean—”

“No, no, it’s okay,” Spencer insisted, already starting to lead the way. “I’m heading that direction anyway.” You both knew that wasn’t true but then, with a quick glance back at you, he added, “Besides, it’s the least I can do after, you know... knocking you over.”

You felt a laugh bubble up in your throat, despite the chaos of the moment. “Okay, thanks,” you said, falling into step beside him. It was a strange, surreal thing—running across campus with Professor Reid at your side, his long legs matching your frantic pace. And even though you were still panicking about being late, there was something oddly comforting about his presence, like the whole situation was slightly less catastrophic just because he was there.

“Don’t worry,” he said between breaths, casting a reassuring glance your way as you both hurried down the path. “You’ll make it. I’ll make sure you get there on time.”

You made it to your exam with barely a minute to spare, heart still racing from sprinting across campus and the whirlwind encounter with Professor Reid. As you settled into your seat, your mind was a jumbled mess of nerves, exhaustion, and the lingering thrill of having Spencer Reid rush beside you, determined to get you there on time. The reality of having bumped into him—literally—and seeing his concerned, handsome face up close again was a distraction you struggled to push away. But as the exam papers were passed out and you took a deep breath, forcing yourself to focus, you felt a small swell of determination rising within you.

It wasn’t just about passing the exam anymore. No, it was about doing well—really well—because a part of you couldn’t shake the feeling that you’d run into Professor Reid again. And if you did, and if he asked you how your exam had gone, you wanted to be able to look him in those warm, interested eyes and say, “I crushed it.”

And so you put everything into it. Every formula, every theory, every bit of knowledge you’d crammed into your brain over the past few weeks. The hours passed in a blur of scribbled answers and focused thought, and by the time you handed in your paper, you felt a surge of pride and relief. You knew you’d done your best—maybe even better than your best.

—

The new term had settled into a predictable rhythm for you: classes in the morning, work in the afternoons, and then hours spent in the library for some uninterrupted study time. By the third week, you found a comforting routine in the silence and solitude of your favorite corner, tucked away but not too far from the bustle of the main floor. It was your place to dive into note-taking, to tackle assignments, and to escape from the chaos of student life. And though your schedule was tiring, there was something satisfying about the repetition—class, work, library, sleep, repeat.

It was a Thursday afternoon, and you were in the thick of your study session, textbooks spread across the table, fingers tapping absently against your highlighter as you scanned the pages. You were deep into a chapter on sustainable building design when a shadow fell over your table, and you heard a voice.

“Excuse me, do you mind if I sit here?”

You looked up, and immediately, your breath caught in your throat. You didn't need to see his face to know who it was, but the confirmation was still enough to make your heart skip a beat. Professor Reid stood there with that same friendly, slightly awkward smile, his bag slung over his shoulder and a stack of books in his arms.

“Professor Reid,” you greeted with a smile of your own, trying not to let on how quickly your pulse was racing. “Of course, go ahead.”

“Thanks,” he said, his eyes crinkling in that gentle way as he pulled out the chair across from you. He sat down, settling his things on the table with a soft thud, and for a moment, you were both just... there, in the kind of companionable silence that libraries are made for. Spencer pulled out his own work, a notebook and a pile of papers, and began arranging them neatly before him, his fingers tapping thoughtfully against the edge of a binder.

“Preparing for midterms?” he asked after a moment, glancing up at you with a tilt of his head, genuinely interested.

“Yeah,” you sighed, giving a little shrug as you gestured to your scattered materials. “Trying to get ahead, make sure I don’t fall behind. You know how it is.”

“I do,” he laughed softly, his gaze drifting to the open book in front of you. “I’m writing one, actually. One of the joys of being on the other side of the classroom.”

“Wow,” you said, the laughter bubbling up before you could stop it. “That... actually sounds like way more pressure than taking one.”

“It can be,” Spencer admitted, a lighthearted grin playing on his lips. “I always end up overthinking it, trying to make the questions fair but challenging, relevant but not too obscure. It’s like creating a puzzle that someone’s actually going to solve.”

You nodded along, smiling at how earnest he was. “That sounds... kind of like how I feel about taking exams, actually. Trying to solve the puzzle without knowing if you even have all the right pieces.”

Spencer leaned back in his chair, his eyes lighting up as he considered that. “Exactly,” he said, like he’d never thought of it that way before. “It’s a lot like that. But the fun part is watching the different ways people solve it, the different approaches and interpretations. It’s... fascinating, really.”

As he spoke, you couldn’t help but watch him, his hands moving expressively as he talked, the way he was so animated about his work. You’d heard him lecture from afar, but this—this was different. There was something more intimate about being across from him like this, sharing space, sharing thoughts.

You smiled, leaning forward a bit. “Sounds like you really enjoy it.”

“I do,” he said, his voice quieter now, almost reflective. “It’s nice to be able to help people understand things, to make learning something enjoyable instead of a chore.”

You nodded, and for a while, the two of you sat there, working side by side, an unspoken connection forming over the shared silence and occasional exchanges. And though you were both absorbed in your own work, you knew now that this wouldn’t be the last time you’d find yourselves at the same table, sharing the same quiet space amidst the noise of college life.

Every Thursday for the rest of the term, your routine became intertwined with Spencer’s. You’d meet in your usual spot in the library, setting up your notes and books, and he'd arrive not long after, dropping into the chair across from you like he belonged there. And for hours, you’d sit together—sometimes in comfortable silence, sometimes falling into deep conversations about classes, life, and everything in between. It was almost comical when, after weeks of these meetings, he finally looked up at you, eyes wide with realization, and laughed softly.

“You know,” he said, smiling sheepishly, “I don’t think I ever asked you your name.”

You couldn’t help but laugh too, blurting it out in a rush, and he repeated it back to you like he was savoring the sound of it. And just like that, something clicked into place. He’d ask about your exams, your grades, always genuinely interested in how you were doing. You, in turn, asked about his lectures and the classes he was teaching, and he would share his thoughts on the challenges of balancing students’ needs, all with that passion and depth you had come to expect from him.

Your friendship blossomed, but it was always contained to those Thursday evenings at the library. It was a boundary neither of you seemed to cross—studying together, talking, connecting, but never making plans outside of the walls of academia. And that was fine, for a time. But as the end of your freshman year loomed closer and summer break approached, the thought of leaving and not seeing Spencer every week weighed on you more than you’d expected.

One Thursday, when you could barely focus on your notes because of it, you found yourself fidgeting, chewing on your pen cap as you tried to summon the courage to speak. Eventually, you couldn’t hold it back any longer.

“Spencer?” you asked, your voice quiet over the hum of the library around you.

“Mhm?” he responded, not looking up from the papers he was reading through but giving a small nod to show he was listening.

You swallowed, nerves bubbling up, but pushed through. “Would you, um, want to come over after exams end? You know, to... say goodbye to the year?”

Spencer paused, his pen freezing mid-note, and he looked up, surprise flashing across his features. He hadn’t expected that, and you could see the wheels turning in his mind as he considered your offer. The idea of spending time together outside the library, beyond your weekly tradition, was both tempting and concerning for him. He’d grown fond of your friendship, of the way you made him laugh and didn’t expect anything from him except a shared space and genuine conversation. But, deep down, a part of him still feared being used like so many others had.

Yet, there was something earnest in your eyes, something that made him think maybe, just maybe, you really did just want to hang out. To be friends, and nothing more. He let out a small breath, nodding slowly. “Sure,” he said, offering a tentative smile. “What did you have in mind?”

Your cheeks flushed, and you hoped the heat wasn’t too obvious as you scratched the back of your neck, trying to sound more confident than you felt. “Uh, I didn’t plan that far ahead,” you admitted with a nervous laugh. “Maybe... a movie? Just something casual.”

“Casual,” he repeated, almost as if testing the word out, and then his smile widened, a bit of relief and something like excitement brightening his eyes. “Yeah. A movie sounds good.”

And just like that, you found yourself looking forward to what might be the start of something new—something beyond Thursday study sessions, something more than a quiet routine.

The Friday after final exams, you paced your dorm room, nerves buzzing through you like electricity. You'd barely slept since inviting Spencer over—second-guessing every detail, every word you’d said. But now, as you checked your phone again, you reminded yourself that it was just a movie, just two friends hanging out to say goodbye to the year. Nothing more. You tried to convince yourself that it was normal to be this excited.

And right on time—exactly at 7 p.m.—you heard a knock at your door. Spencer's punctuality didn’t surprise you, but it did send a rush of excitement through your veins. You took a deep breath, trying to calm yourself, before walking over to the door and opening it.

There he stood, dressed in casual jeans and a plain button-up shirt, looking somehow both effortlessly put together and adorably uncertain all at once. His curls were a bit messy, his glasses slightly askew, and he clutched a bag of something in his hands, which he immediately offered up to you with a slightly bashful smile.

“Um, I wasn’t sure if I should bring something, so I, uh, brought snacks?” he said, holding up the bag like it was a peace offering. You could see a mix of candy, chips, and a few other treats inside.

You grinned, stepping aside to let him in. “You didn’t have to bring anything, but thank you—that’s perfect.” You felt a wave of relief wash over you as he stepped into your room, glancing around with curious eyes as he took in the posters on the wall, the books scattered on your desk, the remnants of your rushed packing for summer break.

“Your roommate left already?” he asked, looking over at the other, empty half of the room.

“Yeah, they went home the day after finals,” you said, trying not to sound too relieved about having the room to yourself. “So it’s just us.”

“Just us,” Spencer repeated, the words hanging in the air with a nervous tinge in his voice. He smiled softly and set the bag of snacks on your bed, taking off his shoes and settling in as if he were almost comfortable—almost.

“So,” you began, moving to sit beside him, your nerves starting to subside as you relaxed into the familiar presence of your study partner turned friend. “I thought we could just pick something light to watch, you know? Nothing too serious.”

“Light sounds good,” Spencer nodded, pushing his glasses up his nose, and for a moment, there was that playful glimmer in his eyes—the same one you’d seen during your library sessions, when a joke or comment would catch him off guard.

You leaned forward to pick up the remote, scrolling through the options until you landed on a few comedies and light-hearted movies. You tossed out a few suggestions, and eventually, the two of you settled on a movie neither of you had seen before—some easygoing, feel-good flick that you knew would make you both laugh and not require too much thinking. You hit play, and as the opening credits rolled, you sank back into the pillows, side by side with Spencer.

There was a comforting quiet between you, a sense of familiarity even in the newness of the situation. And as the movie played and the two of you slowly started sharing the snacks he’d brought, laughing at the jokes on-screen, you felt that same feeling you always did on Thursday nights—the calm certainty that, somehow, this was exactly where you were meant to be.

The movie had been on for about thirty minutes, and both of you were already lost in the silly over-the-top humor. It wasn’t long before the playful energy from the screen found its way into your own conversation, and you couldn’t resist teasing Spencer a little every time he laughed at something you found particularly cheesy.

“Oh, come on,” you grinned, nudging his shoulder with yours. “I can’t believe you’re actually laughing at this. I thought you had... you know, a refined sense of humor.”

Spencer rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of a smile tugging at his lips. “Hey, I can appreciate a good joke, okay? Even the dumb ones. It’s called versatility,” he said, giving you a sidelong glance before popping a piece of candy into his mouth.

“Uh-huh,” you said, leaning closer as if you were about to share a secret. “You’re just pretending to like it so you don’t hurt my feelings.”

He chuckled, turning to face you, and you could feel the warmth radiating from him as his knee bumped lightly against yours. “Trust me,” he said, voice low with that familiar teasing lilt, “I’m not pretending. I genuinely think this movie is... absurdly entertaining.”

“Absurdly entertaining, huh?” you said, narrowing your eyes as you leaned in just a little more, close enough to see the golden flecks in his hazel eyes. “I think that’s code for ‘terrible but in a fun way.’”

“Okay, maybe it is a little terrible,” he admitted, laughing openly now. “But in the best way.”

The lightness in his voice, the ease with which you bantered—it felt effortless. And then, suddenly, there was a shift. His laughter trailed off as he looked at you, his gaze lingering just a beat longer than usual. Your faces were so close, your knees brushing, your shoulders almost touching, and you noticed the way he was looking at you—like he was trying to decide something.

Spencer’s mind was a whirlpool of conflicting thoughts. He wanted to flirt, to let the playful banter turn into something more, but a voice in his head reminded him of past experiences—where interest in him was just a prelude to sex, a quick thrill before moving on. He didn’t want that with you. You were different—kind, genuine, and he didn’t want to ruin whatever you had by crossing a line.

And ever since meeting you, Spencer hadn’t slept with anyone. Your study sessions, conversations, and simple presence filled a void in him; being around you was all the release he needed. Now, sitting beside you, he just wanted to keep this intact, afraid that taking a step further might shatter what he cherished so much.

Little did Spencer know, your own thoughts were tangled with doubt. You'd been excited for this night ever since he said yes, but now, sitting so close to him, you wondered if he'd only come over for the same reason he might have gone to others in the past: sex.

The whispers around campus about Professor Reid’s quick, casual flings were hard to ignore. Reconciling that with the sweet, earnest man beside you felt impossible, but still, the thought gnawed at you. What if, to him, you were just another fleeting encounter before summer ended?

You wanted to believe that your Thursday study sessions meant more than a prelude to something casual, but the worry hung there, making your hand pause before reaching for the snacks. What if you were misreading everything? And if this was just casual to him, could you handle it, or would you rather preserve what you had now?

You glanced at Spencer, who was focused on the movie but stealing nervous glances your way. It was clear he was treading carefully, and you could feel the irony—both of you caught on the edge, too afraid to find out what the other truly wanted.

When the movie ended, the credits rolling silently on the screen, neither of you moved to turn it off or get up. There was an unspoken tension in the room, a pull that made it hard for either of you to suggest that this night should end.

“Do you want to watch another movie?” you blurted out just as Spencer said, “I really like hanging out with you.”

You both paused, your words colliding mid-air, and then burst into laughter. It was awkward, sure, but it was the kind of awkward that felt endearing, pulling you closer instead of apart. The kind that made you grateful for the comfortable silence that followed, where you both sat smiling like fools.

“Another movie sounds great,” he said, the grin on his face not fading, and you nodded in agreement. You both took a break—stretching, refreshing snacks, and using the restroom. When you returned to your dorm room, you found Spencer sitting more toward the middle of your bed, and when you slid in next to him, your bodies ended up pressed tightly together, the heat of his side warming yours through your clothes. You were hyper-aware of every place where you touched, but neither of you pulled away.

“Your turn to pick,” you said softly, handing him the laptop.

Spencer flipped through the options with focused eyes, and finally, he settled on a film—a foreign romance, its title scrolling across the screen in delicate script. You raised an eyebrow, curious but also a little lost. “Spencer,” you said, trying not to sound too nervous, “I, uh, don’t speak French.”

His eyes met yours, and this time, the way he looked at you was different—more intense, like he was seeing something in you that hadn’t been spoken aloud. It sent a shiver down your spine. “That’s okay,” he murmured, his voice low and almost intimate. “I can whisper translate for you... if you don’t mind.”

The idea of Spencer leaning in close, his voice softly whispering translations in your ear as romantic lines played out on the screen, made your heart race in a way you couldn't control. You could practically feel his breath on your neck already, the warmth of his words settling into your skin.

“Okay,” you agreed, your voice barely above a whisper, the word catching on your lips as you tried to keep your composure.

You pressed play, and as the opening scene unfolded, you found yourself sinking deeper into the bed, Spencer’s body comfortably close to yours, and your heart pounding in anticipation of every word he would breathe into the small space between you.

The movie’s soft music and dreamy cinematography made it easy to get lost in its world, but it was Spencer’s voice—low, rich, and soothing—that anchored you. He leaned in, and his breath brushed against your skin as he whispered the translation, his tone low and almost reverent.

“Élise tells her...” he began, his voice wrapping around you like a warm blanket, “‘When I'm near you... everything disappears. The whole world, the sounds, time... there's only you and me.’”

The words hung in the air, and your senses were drawn to the way his lips moved against you as he concentrated on the words. You couldn't help but feel mesmerized by the way he brought the romance to life, the intensity in his whisper making your skin tingle with every syllable.

“Juliet replies...” he continued, not yet noticing how your attention was fully on him now. “‘You are the reason I breathe, Élise. Every beat of my heart... it whispers your name. If I could, I would spend every second of my life looking at you.’”

And that’s exactly what you did now—look at him. His eyes were still on the screen, but there was something in his expression that felt vulnerable, open, as if he wasn’t just translating lines, but baring something deeper, something unspoken between you. You couldn’t resist leaning in just a little closer, every inch of your body hyper-aware of the closeness between you.

“‘Then look at me... and never let me go,’” he whispered, and when he finally turned to meet your gaze, the intensity in his eyes nearly took your breath away. His voice was softer, more intimate, as if he was no longer speaking for the movie characters but for the two of you alone. “‘Because without you, I'm lost. You are my everything.’”

Your heart raced, pounding in your chest as you stared at each other, your faces so close now that you could see the flecks of gold in his hazel eyes, the way his breath came out just a bit more quickly. Spencer’s eyes searched yours, and you could see the hesitation in them, the question he didn’t dare ask.

“‘I promise you... never, ever will I let you go,’” he whispered, his voice barely audible, his lips only a breath away. “‘Because I love you... more than anything in the world.’”

Neither of you moved, frozen in that charged space between a word and a touch, every part of you yearning to close the gap as the rest of the world fell away.

The words hung in the air, your shared gaze brimming with something unspoken and heavy. And then, as if on cue, both of you turned your eyes back to the screen, where Élise and Juliet leaned in, their faces close, the tension snapping as they fell into a deep, passionate kiss. The soft sounds of the movie filled the silence between you.

“Do you want me to translate that?” Spencer asked, his voice barely above a whisper, his breath warm on your cheek. The words were teasing but tentative, laced with a hope that sent a shiver down your spine.

But before he could say anything more, before you could second-guess the pounding of your heart, you closed the space between you. Your lips met his in a sudden, breathless kiss that left no room for doubt or hesitation. The taste of him, soft and warm, was everything you had imagined it would be. You felt Spencer’s sharp inhale, the surprise in his body, but then he melted into you, his mouth moving against yours like it was something he'd been waiting for all along.

His hand came up to cup your cheek, gentle but sure, pulling you closer, and the world disappeared—just like Élise had whispered—leaving only you and him in the electrifying moment of finally letting go.

Deep down, both of you felt that nagging worry—was this just a fleeting moment, a one-time thing? But as your lips moved together, those thoughts slipped away, overwhelmed by the heat of the moment, the desperation in every kiss and touch. Spencer laid you back gently, his hands trembling slightly as he held you, his eyes searching yours for any sign that you wanted to stop. But there was only desire and your verbal confirmation, and so he continued, showing you the skills he’d learned over the past year.

And when the clothes were shed and the vulnerability became all-consuming, you allowed him to take your virginity, holding back that delicate truth out of embarrassment over your own inexperience. You didn’t want him to stop, didn’t want to add more pressure to a moment already so fragile and important to you both. Spencer, in turn, treated you with a reverence that spoke to his genuine care, his every touch slow and deliberate, like he was savoring each second.

It was the most passionate, mind-blowing experience Spencer had ever had. Every gasp, every whispered name, every shared look made it clear why—it was you, and it felt like something more than just sex, something deeper, like he was baring his soul alongside his body. When it was over, the two of you lay tangled together, hearts still racing, bodies wrapped around each other like you could hold the moment in place forever. And in that perfect silence, Spencer’s arms became a haven, and you drifted off to sleep, feeling safe, happy, and loved.

But morning came like a cold shock. You reached out across the bed, seeking his warmth, and found only emptiness. The sheets were cool, and Spencer was gone—no note, no sign of him ever having been there. The joy, the love, the comfort you’d fallen asleep to vanished with the sunrise, leaving behind an aching emptiness and the haunting fear that maybe all your doubts were true.

—

Summer came and went, and though the days were warm and filled with distractions, nothing eased the emptiness Spencer left behind. The pain of waking up to find him gone never faded, and as you returned to campus for your sophomore year, the ache of his absence settled in deeper, an open wound that wouldn’t heal.

You looked for him—hoping to see that familiar face in the library, in a lecture hall, anywhere on campus—but every search ended in disappointment. It was like he’d vanished, leaving not a trace behind. Over the next three years, you went through the motions, diving into your studies and trying to let go of what happened, but the memory of him never left, haunting every quiet moment and making you wonder what you'd done wrong.

The truth was clear to you now: Spencer had used you, filling some void in himself for one night, and then disappearing, leaving a much larger void in your own heart.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

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the-cosmic-cauldron · 1 month ago

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Unpopular Synastry Opinions 💘💓❣️💚💞💖💙💛🖤💗💜💔❤️💕

Disclaimer: This is a long post. If it doesn’t apply, let it fly. These explanations in my perspective resonate most with your Synastry based on the Whole Sign system.

💕 For me, in order to have a romantic connection with someone, their planets must fall into the houses of romance in your chart. If not, it doesn’t mean you won’t have a romantic relationship, but it does suggest that the connection might be more rooted in friendship, familiarity, work, career, or business rather than romance.

🏡The houses of romance are the 5th, 7th, 8th, and 12th houses.

1️⃣ The 1st house in synastry isn’t particularly amazing to me. In fact, I think it can cause more issues than it provides benefits. The reason is that everything becomes tied to the house person’s identity. For example, if your Sun falls in their 1st house, everything revolves around the house person’s sense of self. While there might be attraction and allure, it also creates a dynamic where the focus is heavily on one person. To me, this doesn’t really scream romance as much as it functions as a confidence booster for the house person. I think it works well if there are other connections to the romantic houses (5th, 7th, 8th, or 12th), as the 1st house overlay can complement those by boosting someone’s confidence within the relationship. However, on its own, I don’t see the 1st house as particularly compelling or significant for fostering deep romance.

(My first house falls in the Moon of my ex, and although he always gave me so many compliments, I never felt like I was extending that same energy to him. This can sometimes lead to the planet person feeling used. First house energy can often come across as selfish.)

2️⃣The 2nd house in synastry always points to a business partnership, working on a project, or trying to accomplish a goal together. To me, it is not a romantic house. It’s heavily focused on assets, finances, and values. While some people tend to romanticize it—because that’s part of the allure of synastry and the desire to find romantic connections—it’s ultimately a serious house. This is where you and the other person are likely to focus on discussions about goals, plans for making money, or increasing stability, rather than romance.It’s not a romantic house at all, and it can also be easily afflicted because it deals with sensitive matters like finances and personal values. If the planetary interactions aren’t beneficial, it can become detrimental. Someone’s planets in your 2nd house could mess up your money, disrupt your goals, complicate business ventures, or undermine your responsibilities and stability.

( All the people I’ve met whose planets fell in my second house were people I encountered when I was trying to accomplish something, had a goal in mind, or was driven and focused on achieving that goal. That’s why I believe the second house isn’t really a house of romance—when you meet these people, you’re not necessarily looking for romance; you’re focused on your goals.

For example, I met two people whose planets fell in my second house while I was in cosmetology school, focused on earning my cosmetology license. I also met a guy in college while I was working toward my degree and pursuing education. Another time, I met someone whose planet fell into my second house, and they actually introduced me to someone else whose planet also fell into my second house.

I’ve noticed a consistent theme: most of the time, when you meet people whose planets fall in your second house, it’s in structured environments like work or school. You might meet them while handling finances at the bank or while pursuing a skill or goal in life. These connections often happen when you’re focused on something significant.

However, these relationships can go either way—they may uplift and support you, or they may become a detriment. In my experience, many of these people ended up being more of a detriment than a positive influence, likely because the second house can sometimes be afflicted and easily lean into its negative aspects.)

3️⃣The 3rd house, to me, is best suited for friendships. The reason it works well for friendships is that it fosters a talkative dynamic. With someone’s planets in your 3rd house, you’re likely to have a relationship where you both enjoy talking about your day-to-day lives, sharing what’s going on, gossiping, and having casual chit-chat.This placement often involves doing things together around town, like going to the mall, visiting restaurants, hanging out at bars or clubs, spending time in nature, or attending events. The energy of the 3rd house brings a sense of local community and a hometown vibe. It emphasizes communication, sharing ideas, and bouncing thoughts off one another.Because of this, the 3rd house is ideal for friendships, as it creates a lighthearted, engaging, and socially active connection.

(The third house is another place where you can meet people, particularly in learning environments. This could include retreats, workshops, hobby classes (like candle-making), or even orientations at school or work. Essentially, any setting where learning takes place is a likely spot to meet someone whose planet falls into your third house.

For example, I once met someone whose Ascendant fell into my third house, and what’s interesting is that we met in a communication class in college. I always find that so fitting for third house energy. When we started talking, we really hit it off—we were texting 24/7, chatting constantly, and hanging out frequently. We’d go to local places like restaurants or ice cream shops, which is so typical of third house energy.

Our activities were very local: we’d attend festivals, events, bars, and clubs together. It wasn’t about long-distance travel; it was about enjoying day-to-day life in the same area. We’d gossip, share details about our daily lives, and even FaceTime when one of us went on vacation—she would literally show me her day in real time.

The third house energy also shaped the tone of our conversations. Since her Ascendant was in Aquarius, we often had open-ended discussions about the future, radical ideas, activism, and LGBTQ topics. This placement is fantastic for friendships—it’s the “bestie energy,” where you always want to hang out locally and talk endlessly. It’s the type of connection where you’re constantly saying, “Let’s go anywhere in town and just hang out.”)

4️⃣The 4th house, to me, is not really a good house for romance or friendship. The reason I say this is that for romance, the 4th house is about familiarity, but that familiarity doesn’t always feel good. It can be something like, “Oh, you remind me of home,” but what is home? That’s different for everyone. People come from all sorts of backgrounds, and what feels familiar to one person might be unhealthy. For some, home could mean toxic people, manipulators, narcissists, abusers, or individuals who lack compassion. Navigating the 4th house can be difficult because not everyone has a positive experience with familiarity. This house also focuses a lot on home life, and when it’s negatively afflicted, it can cause tension between you and this person’s family. Their family might not accept you, they could judge you, or it could simply create a dependent relationship. In friendships or romantic relationships, the 4th house can trigger old wounds, leading to feelings of being stuck, codependent, or bogged down.That said, if someone comes from a healthy, nurturing home environment and has a positive background, the 4th house can create a sense of comfort and security, especially if familiarity is what they’re seeking. However, most people are often looking for something different than their family or roots when they seek a partner or even a friend. They want something new and different. So, for many, the 4th house can be an afflicted house.

(In my experience with people whose planets fell into my fourth house, the relationship always felt like I already knew them. With fourth house energy, there’s this overwhelming sense of familiarity—you feel like you’ve met this person before, or they remind you of someone from your family or home life. It’s almost as if they embody the essence of your upbringing, and that familiarity can create an instant connection.

When you meet someone with planets in your fourth house, they might remind you of your family or your home life, making it feel like you can understand them easily. There’s a sense of relating to them on a deep level because they reflect so much of what you’ve already experienced.

However, what I don’t like about fourth house energy is how it mirrors so much of your home life and your past. The relationship tends to reflect your prior experiences, including your upbringing and relationships within your family. If your home life wasn’t healthy or was filled with challenges, this can be incredibly triggering.

For example, I grew up dealing with manipulation at home, and I met someone whose personal planet fell into my fourth house who was also very manipulative. Another person with this placement was extremely emotional, which mirrored the highly emotional environment I grew up in. Like me, this person had also grown up in an emotionally destabilized home and dealt with similar abuses. Relationships like these can create a trauma bond because you’re connecting over shared wounds and struggles from your past.

Of course, if you had a healthy and happy home life, this dynamic might feel completely different and positive. But when that’s not the case, it can feel overwhelming and even draining. Most of the fourth house relationships I’ve been in have felt familiar and similar to me, but that similarity wasn’t always a good thing. At times, it felt like it hindered the relationship because it didn’t foster growth or bring anything new to the table.

The fourth house energy often brings relationships that reflect what you’re used to. But I think most people, myself included, are usually looking for something different—something outside of their comfort zone and past experiences. Fourth house relationships tend to repeat patterns from the past or bring people who are too similar to you.

For instance, I tend to avoid confrontation when I have issues, and I can be quite passive. I met someone whose planet fell into my fourth house, and they were exactly the same way. Instead of addressing problems, they just blocked me, which is something I’ve been guilty of doing as well.

People whose planets fall into your fourth house can act like a mirror, reflecting your past or your unresolved issues. They can be so similar to you that it becomes difficult to grow or create the kind of relationship you truly want. These relationships often feel like they have unresolved tension or lingering issues, and they don’t always foster a deep or fulfilling connection.)

5️⃣ To me, the 5th house is all about romance. Some people often talk about how the 5th house is fleeting, but you have to understand that they only attribute that perception because they’re projecting their own idea of romance onto the 5th house. The 5th house represents the type of romance you see in the movies, where someone gives you flowers, shows up for dates, writes love letters, and you’re going to different places together, enjoying time with each other. It’s the kind of romance where you’re so in love and captivated with one another, always wanting to be around each other, bringing each other happiness. You smile more when you’re together, and life just feels better because you’re doing things you love, inspired by the other person. The 5th house is a deeply romantic house. I don’t fall into the trap of thinking, “Oh, it’s not long-lasting.” I think people often say that because they’re projecting their own idea of romance onto it. But the 5th house brings that idealized, cheesy romance—the kind where you write each other love letters, poems, or even sing to each other. It’s giving gifts, roses, and all the Pinterest-worthy relationship moments. That’s the energy the 5th house brings.When you see an artsy couple painting together, that’s 5th house energy. When you see a couple who’s always laughing, giggling, and having fun, that’s 5th house energy. And when you see a couple who can’t keep their hands off each other, always touching and feeling on each other, that’s 5th house energy too. It’s a house that brings a fun, playful, and passionate vibe to relationships.

( The people whose personal planets fall in my fifth house always make everything feel like a fun time, where the focus is really just on fun, romance, and romantic things. Even with my sister, whose personal planet falls in my fifth house, we are really close. She’s done so many romantic things for me, like giving me romantic gifts, and we’re affectionate with each other. We write each other long paragraphs, compliment each other, and do fun things together. We try out hobbies like planting plants, doing artwork, and doing makeup together. We just have so much fun—we laugh together and always watch these dramatic shows, which is such fifth house energy.

Even in friendships, the fifth house energy makes things so enjoyable. You’re always going out to eat, doing things that make you laugh, and creating memories together. You’re really loyal to each other and don’t want that loyalty to ever break. You go on a lot of dates and genuinely have fun. My ex, whose personal planet also fell into my fifth house, and I did the same things. We’d go to Dave & Buster’s to have fun, ride scooters all around town, and spend hours on FaceTime joking and laughing. We’d go out to eat together, enjoying food, and listen to music together. We wanted to start things together like hobbies. He’d write me love letters, send me paragraphs expressing his love, and dedicate songs to me. We had songs that were “ours.” He’d get me flowers and buy me gifts, things he didn’t do for other girls. He was so deeply in love with me and wanted to do all the cheesy and romantic things.

Fifth house energy is truly needed—it makes you feel so attracted to each other. You just appreciate each other so much, and giving gifts, compliments, and doing romantic things comes effortlessly. Even in friendships, you’re always ready to have a good time. You really become besties because you enjoy each other that much.)

6️⃣Again, I know a lot of people romanticize certain houses, but the 6th house is not one to romanticize. The 6th house is a boring house. It is not about romance. I think it’s a good house to have in your relationship with your parents. If you have a parent with a 6th house placement, it can make them a great, responsible parent to you. The 6th house handles day-to-day routines, work, goals, projects, responsibilities, and health. So, yes, if you have a relationship with your parent that involves the 6th house, that’s fine.However, you don’t want to have a friendship in the 6th house. It leads to a boring friendship—one that you probably have because you work together or attend school together. It’s a friendship that’s likely to fizzle out because, outside of the goal or task you’re working on, it lacks depth and becomes dull. It also requires a lot of work. With a parent and child, the 6th house is somewhat inevitable because parenting is a lot of work. But in a friendship or romantic relationship, if it requires too much work, it can cause strain. It can make you feel miserable, as if there’s no romance in the relationship.There’s also a level of service and duty in the 6th house. You might even feel obligated to the other person. That’s why I said the 6th house is best for parent-child relationships. In that dynamic, you’re more likely to feel obligated, but in a friendship or romance, it can feel burdensome.

(The sixth house is really a boring placement for me. I know a couple of people whose personal planets fall into my sixth house, and there’s always this sense of boredom. I feel like they’re boring, and I want more fun, adventure, and excitement, but they just can’t provide that for me. That’s what the sixth house is—it has a very dry energy, and it often comes with a feeling of obligation and work. You might feel obligated to these people, even if you genuinely don’t want to do things with them. You might still feel like, “Oh, I just have to do this for this person,” or, “Let me just suck it up and go hang out with them,” because that’s the energy they bring.

One thing I’ve noticed is that there are often really boring periods in the relationship where nothing exciting is happening. All your hangouts feel really dry—maybe you don’t have much to talk about or share. You’re only talking about your job or your goals, and there’s nothing else you’re really discussing. People with a sixth house placement will talk a lot about work, responsibilities, and their goals. There’s rarely any deep or fun conversation. A lot of these people focus on education or other serious topics, which adds to the boring feel.

Also, with sixth house energy, these are the kind of people who might give you only what they can offer, rather than meeting your expectations. You might expect more romance, fun, or excitement, but they’ll just give you, “Oh, let’s hang out and do this,” and nothing else is really planned. I had one person whose personal planet fell in my sixth house, and they were so boring to talk to—it was just a snooze fest. Another person, I always felt like I never had fun around them. Everything just felt dry. Communication can be deep in some aspects, but I feel like a lot of what they want to do is super boring and routine. They really just want to stick to their routine, and that’s what I don’t like about people whose personal planets fall into your sixth house—they’re unwilling to break out of their routine. You have to adjust to their routine, and if it’s someone in your family, you’re going to feel heavily obligated to them. You may not even care to be around them, but you still feel like you have to stick around and do things for them.)

7️⃣ The seventh house represents the quintessential romance that we are told about—opposites attract, and you find someone who completes you. The whole idea of the seventh house is that you meet someone who complements you, someone who makes you feel loved and makes everything in your life more meaningful. The seventh house is about opposites attracting. You come to this earth with only a certain amount of traits, attributes, or space for yourself, and then you find a partner who completes that picture for you. So, the seventh house is all about finding a soulmate. To me, the seventh house really indicates soulmate energy—the energy of your other half, the energy of what we could even call a twin flame. That’s the energy I get from the seventh house.For example, if you’re an Aries Rising, the seventh house would be Libra for you. In saying that, the seventh house is Libra for you, meaning Aries holds a certain energy opposite to Libra, and Libra holds a certain energy opposite to Aries. When they come together, they almost become complementary. The passive and the assertive unite to create a wholesome picture.When you think about the seventh house, you think about people bringing different qualities. You think about Libra bringing the romance, flowers, and all the beautiful romantic things. You think about Aries as the provider, the protector, the person who takes care of the house, makes sure the bills are paid, and makes decisions. It’s a traditional type of relationship that you get with the seventh house.For some people, they prefer the romance of the fifth house, but I would say the seventh house is more about a traditional relationship. It’s where the woman is more submissive and the man takes on the role of the head or the leader of the house. The seventh house energy suggests that we have roles that we’re assigned and we play, and that’s how we navigate our relationship. The seventh house is about courtship—the person you’re with courts you. It follows the traditional steps, like courting, proposing, getting married, and living happily ever after.

(People forget that your 7th house is based on your rising sign, not your sun sign. A lot of people will say, “Oh, I couldn’t go with this type of person based on their sun sign,” but it’s based on your rising. Every person I’ve met whose personal planet fell into my 7th house has had a crush on me. They’ve been interested, thought I was attractive, and enjoyed our conversations. I’ve had two people whose planets fell into my 7th house, and yes, they did find me attractive, but at the same time, they got really into me when we were talking. Just being able to have discussions with me drew them in even more. I feel like a lot of them thought I was the perfect person for them or the “good girl” for them.

I feel like 7th house energy represents someone feeling like you’re the right person for them. With friendships, it’s that type of bond where the other person really understands you. I had someone whose personal planet fell into my 7th house, and I felt like they truly understood me. They easily grasped my perspective, and I also felt like they were my vibe. I like to talk a lot, and they liked to talk a lot too—we just clicked.

7th house friendships can be really fun. Every time someone I’m around lands in my 7th house with any planet, they always want to talk to me. They get curious about me, feel like I’m a good person, and are drawn to the positive elements of me. I feel like people with a personal planet in my 7th house really like me. That’s what you often get—an affinity for you, even if you’re just friends. If you’re in a relationship, they always kind of like you. Even if you’re different, they’re interested in those differences. They don’t shy away from them; in fact, the differences pull them in. )

8️⃣Unlike the 5th and 7th houses—where the 5th house represents cheesy, romantic, fun couple goals, and the 7th house represents the traditional couple that leads to marriage—the 8th house represents the deep couple. Imagine a couple that has long, meaningful conversations, getting to know each other on a level most others don’t, where they can read each other’s minds and pick up on cues without speaking.Imagine a relationship where you can have tantric intimacy, or where just being around each other creates a sense of arousal. Picture a bond so strong that you feel like a ride-or-die partner, with unshakable loyalty to the deepest degree. No matter what happens, you remain devoted to this person, willing to go through thick and thin, hell and high waters, as long as you’re together. This is the type of person you would fight for—literally. It’s the kind of relationship where you protect your partner to the highest degree, never allowing anyone to disrespect them. That’s 8th house energy.The 8th house energy is staying up late, talking for hours about each other’s lives, bonding over past experiences, traumas, fears, and the most vulnerable parts of yourselves. It’s the kind of relationship where you can stare into each other’s eyes and see straight into each other’s souls. This type of relationship teaches you so much about yourself, both inside and outside the bedroom. It’s a bond where you trust your partner so deeply that you share things with them you wouldn’t with anyone else—your secrets, your money, your entire self.The 8th house energy is not for everyone, just as 7th house energy isn’t for everyone. The 8th house demands a level of depth, vulnerability, rawness, authenticity, and intimacy that touches every aspect of the relationship. It’s not a surface-level bond. It’s not the type of relationship you post about online for the aesthetic. Instead, it’s the type where you pour your heart out, writing five-page letters detailing every reason you love this person.The 8th house energy can feel so intertwined that when your partner goes through something, it feels like you’re going through it too. At times, the intensity can become overwhelming, leading to moments when you feel the need to take a step back and catch your breath. These relationships often experience heated arguments and deeply emotional highs and lows. Yet, despite the challenges, this is the type of relationship that fosters immense growth. It’s the ultimate catalyst for personal and relational evolution.

(Be prepared for deep bonds when someone’s personal planets are in your eighth house. Every person I’ve had dealings with whose personal planet is in my eighth house has resulted in a deep relationship. Usually, what happens is that if you’re dealing with someone of a gender you’re attracted to, there’s automatically a lot of focus on intimacy. That comes to the forefront, and it’s something that isn’t always talked about, but the eighth house brings up raw, primal energy—those suppressed desires. When you’re around that person, you just really want to unleash them. It also gives you this perspective of navigating intense emotions and channeling them into physical intimacy.

With friendships, the relationships are very deep, with a lot of loyalty. You can easily talk about deep topics quickly, often diving into trauma bonding. You discuss your fears and vulnerabilities, and you may feel more open to talk about things you normally wouldn’t. But with other people, especially in romantic dynamics, the eighth house energy can also be fearful and uncertain. You may not know if you can trust the person, and sometimes those bonds never fully develop because there’s a lack of trust. Trust issues often arise with eighth house energy.

I’ve had eighth house energy with people where I could talk to them on the phone for hours. With this energy, when you’re around them, you can feel their emotions. It creates an empathetic bond, especially depending on the sign it’s in. I’ve also noticed that eighth house energy prompts you to confront your trauma or unpack your issues. So, a lot of talking about personal struggles, trauma, and vulnerabilities happens. It creates a very ride-or-die relationship—you might hate the person one minute and love them the next, but there’s a loyalty that remains. It’s a very passionate relationship, and there’s a lot of passion shared between you.

What I’ve noticed in eighth house relationships is that they often go through cycles. You may be super close, then fall off, and then come back together. You’ll never really forget someone whose planet falls in your eighth house, or vice versa. They’re the type of person you think about deeply, even if things are no longer happening. These relationships can get overwhelming at times, and you may need space from each other. At some point, stepping back from the situation is necessary. Money often comes into play with eighth house energy—either the person doesn’t want to spend on you, they’re going through a financial crisis, you need money, or you end up loaning them money. Money is always somehow tied to eighth house relationships.)

9️⃣The 9th house is not typically seen as an ideal house to share with someone in a relationship. It often represents distance, usually physical distance. Whether the relationship is with a family member, a friend, or a lover, there’s likely to be some physical separation involved. At some point, you may find yourselves apart due to opportunities for personal growth, education, or differing life paths—such as one person moving to a new city while the other stays behind. This distance can create challenges and make the relationship feel tricky to navigate.Another aspect of 9th house relationships is the potential for arguments and conflicts, especially when it comes to philosophies, beliefs, and education. Everyone has their own perspective, and if these perspectives clash, it can lead to constant disagreements. For example, if you and the other person have opposing beliefs, the relationship may turn into a cycle of asserting your viewpoints without finding common ground. This might look like one person being Christian and the other Muslim, which can create difficulties in navigating shared values. Or it could be a dynamic where one person is highly spiritual while the other is deeply religious, like a mother forcing religion on a child who leans more toward spirituality. In romantic relationships, differing beliefs can also show up in lifestyle choices, such as one partner favoring traditional provider roles while the other prefers a 50-50 partnership. These clashes over philosophies can make the relationship feel strained. However, if both people share similar beliefs, the 9th house energy can foster open discussions, thoughtful debates, and mutual growth. It becomes a space for diving deep into shared values, exploring ideas, and expanding together. This mutual understanding can make the energy of the 9th house productive and rewarding. The challenges of the 9th house also include the physical distance that often arises. Travel may be necessary to see each other, and the lack of physical closeness can take away from the intimacy of the relationship. Additionally, the 9th house often focuses on growth and expansion, which can mean that personal journeys take precedence over the relationship itself. One person may prioritize their personal development or career, while the other might not, creating a mismatch in priorities.In summary, while the 9th house can provide opportunities for intellectual growth and shared exploration when beliefs align, it often comes with challenges like physical distance, differing philosophies, and an emphasis on individual journeys over the relationship. In my personal perspective, it’s not the easiest placement for building a strong, intimate connection.

(I’ve had two relationships with people whose personal planets fell in my ninth house, and what I can tell you is that, at some point, there’s going to be distance. At some point, it’s going to be long distance, and you’ll have to decide which path you want to go on: do you want to stay together, or are you growing apart? Ninth house energy often leads to relationships where you just grow apart. You get together initially, share common philosophies, outlooks, perspectives, and beliefs, but then you grow apart as you’re on different paths, and it no longer aligns.

In both of those relationships, there were clearly two different belief systems, and I feel like that’s usually what happens with ninth house placements. It typically means that you come from two different backgrounds. For the first person, I wasn’t religious, but they were. For the second person, we had different upbringings—I grew up in apartments with both parents, and they grew up in a house with a single mother. Just two different lifestyles. Both of these people had different beliefs from mine, and it created a lot of tension because we had conflicting belief systems and perspectives. That was a big struggle for me.

Ninth house relationships can sometimes feel like you’re longing for something you’re not getting. You’re yearning for something, and it’s more about hope than reality. Another thing I’ve noticed in ninth house relationships is that they tend to occur when you’re going through a period of growth, challenges, or transition—when you’re moving on to the next chapter. You often meet these people when you need someone to pull you out of your circumstances or give you a new perspective. You might meet them when you’re more closed-minded, struggling, or isolated. But what I’ve found is that these relationships are often meant to help you in the moment, and then, at some point, you break up and move on because they don’t last forever, on and off again relationship)

1️⃣0️⃣To me, the 10th house is not a good house for anything other than work. It functions well in a professional setting because, in the workplace, there’s an inherent understanding and acceptance of authority. You expect to have a manager, boss, or supervisor—someone above you in the hierarchy, such as a CEO. Even if you dislike your manager or supervisor, you generally respect the roles and the structure. This hierarchy makes sense in the context of work, but when it comes to friendships and romantic relationships, the dynamics become trickier. The 10th house works better in a parent-child relationship. For example, having a 10th house placement with your mother or father can be beneficial. They can provide structure, guidance, and support in making decisions about your education, career, and other life matters. Parents in this placement can help you build discipline and make strategic choices. However, in any other relationship, particularly romantic or platonic, the 10th house tends to introduce issues like power imbalances, abuse of authority, narcissism, and overly critical or forceful behavior. This house can easily become afflicted and detrimental.In romantic relationships, authority is not a desirable dynamic unless you’re someone who explicitly seeks a traditional structure, such as a woman looking for a man to be the provider, leader, or authority figure. However, in modern times, many people don’t want that kind of dynamic in their relationships, and as a result, 10th house placements in romance often create friction. Additionally, the 10th house focuses heavily on public image—how you’re perceived by the world around you. This can lead to relationships or friendships that look perfect on the surface but are completely different behind closed doors.For example, a romantic couple with 10th house energy might appear polished and ideal to the outside world—they dress well, present themselves as successful, and seem like the “it couple.” But privately, their relationship could be riddled with conflict, domestic violence, or toxicity. Think about Beyoncé and Jay-Z: they were seen as the ultimate power couple, but behind the scenes, they faced challenges that tarnished that perfect image. Similarly, a 10th house friendship might look like two people who are inseparable and deeply connected, but in reality, they talk down to each other, bully one another, or even blackmail each other. The public perception is completely at odds with the truth. When the 10th house energy is working positively, it might involve mutual support to achieve success or maintaining a strong public image together. However, even in its best form, it lacks depth and intimacy. It’s more about external appearances and worldly accomplishments than genuine emotional connection. For this reason, I don’t see the 10th house as conducive to romantic relationships. Its focus on power dynamics, public image, and superficial success often overshadows the qualities that make a partnership meaningful.

(In the relationships I’ve had with people whose personal planets fall in my 10th house, one being a romantic relationship and the other a friendship, I’ve noticed a pattern. The person with the planets in my 10th house often idealizes you for your appearance or public image, even before they get to know you. They might be attracted to you simply because you’re pretty, have a nice style, or present yourself well. It’s not in a dreamy, Piscean way, but more in a superficial, external way—they want to be part of your life because of how you look or what you represent.

For example, the first guy I dated with personal planets in my 10th house thought I was attractive and liked my style, but he focused more on how we looked as a couple and wanted to present a perfect image. He would tell everyone how much he loved me, but behind closed doors, he treated me terribly. He was rude, critical, and even talked to other women. The second guy was similar, but in this case, he made me look good publicly, like we were close friends, but secretly had a crush on me. Eventually, he started expressing his feelings, and everything turned awkward.

What I’ve learned is that 10th house relationships can be very mismatched. What’s presented to the public isn’t always what’s happening behind the scenes. You might look good on the outside, but your relationship could be falling apart, or vice versa. There’s often a disconnect between how things are presented to others and what’s really going on privately.)

1️⃣1️⃣To me, the 11th house is really just a house for friends. It can also work well in parenting, especially as the parent-child relationship evolves and the child gets older. With 11th house energy, a parent might be more accepting, allowing their child to fully embrace who they are. This house also functions well in a work environment, where you’re collaborating with people you respect, find intriguing, and genuinely enjoy being around. That kind of energy makes for a great professional setting. However, when it comes to romantic relationships, the 11th house doesn’t feel romantic to me. Unless you’re looking for something unconventional—like a friends-with-benefits situation, a sneaky link, or a polyamorous relationship such as a thruple—the 11th house is not ideal for romance. This house gives off a vibe of I like being around you, but I don’t want any strings attached. Some people argue that 11th house energy represents “besties to lovers,” but I disagree. Synergy in a romantic relationship is something that typically exists from the beginning and continues throughout the relationship. I don’t believe it starts as friendship and then grows into something deeper. Instead, 11th house relationships often lead to situationships. For example, when someone says, We’ve been talking for three months, but they haven’t brought up commitment, that could be a result of 11th house energy. It tends to avoid true commitment and romance, sticking instead to a friendship-like dynamic. In our modern culture, when you’re dealing with someone you’re physically attracted to, this energy might naturally lead to intimacy, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it will lead to commitment. If you share 11th house placements with someone, it’s important to recognize that the relationship will likely be unconventional. That’s just the nature of the 11th house—it prioritizes friendship and camaraderie over romantic spark.For example, have you ever seen a couple who are so alike in personality that they seem more like friends? They can laugh, goof around, and have a great time together, but imagining them being romantically intimate feels almost impossible because their energy is so platonic. That’s 11th house energy. It’s the type of connection where someone might say, We’re sneaky links; we hang out late at night, but I’m not trying to commit to this long term. Couples with 11th house energy might describe each other as my best friend, not necessarily because they’re deeply in love but because that’s exactly how they view each other—as best friends. This is the person they talk to about everything, the person who gets them like no one else. While that dynamic can be valuable in a relationship, I don’t personally see it as romantic. It feels more like a friendship with an unconventional twist, rather than a deep, lifelong romantic partnership.

( People with personal planets in my 11th house feel like good friends to me. One relationship I had, I felt like it messed up the romantic part because I just wanted to be friends and be intimate whenever we felt like it. That’s the energy the 11th house brings—it’s very friendly.

We shared common interests, like nature, traveling, good food, and psychology. Another person I knew had similar interests, like anime, photography, and activism. I’ve found friendships with 11th house people are easy to develop because we click right away. It’s also the kind of unconventional friendship where the person might be a bit “weird” or have niche interests.

In romantic relationships with 11th house people, I’ve never been able to stay in them. Even when a friend wanted to try a romantic relationship, it felt like we were just better off as friends. The connection felt more like friendship than romance, and that’s how I’ve felt in all 11th house relationships. Even with someone I was in an actual relationship with, it felt more like a friendship than a romance. We shared interests, had fun together, and talked a lot—often through online mediums. I met one person online, and we communicated a lot this way. So, relationships with 11th house people tend to be more about friendship and shared experiences.)

1️⃣2️⃣The 12th house is a controversial house because it represents many things that can easily be misunderstood. It is undeniably a romantic house because all the water houses are inherently romantic. Water represents emotions, depth, and the connections that bond us together through shared emotional experiences. Romance, at its core, is built on emotions—falling in love and staying in love are deeply emotional processes. However, the 12th house can be difficult to navigate because we live in a concrete, practical world. We’re expected to work, go to school, and handle daily responsibilities, which often strips away the romantic energy to begin with. The 12th house is especially challenging because it represents a spiritual kind of love, and many people don’t focus on spirituality in their daily lives. Instead, they’re preoccupied with the practical.Additionally, our cultural ideas about romance—such as courting, dating, talking stages, and following a linear progression to commitment—don’t align with 12th house energy. This energy doesn’t follow those parameters. If you’re looking for a relationship that fits into your physical, practical day-to-day life, 12th house energy might feel out of place or even disruptive. This is why some people with 12th house energy in their relationships may end up having secret affairs. For example, someone who doesn’t have time for romance in their primary relationship might seek out a secret connection to fulfill that desire for something mystical and boundless. The 12th house is a house without boundaries, concreteness, or structure, which can lead to things like secret love affairs or deception. However, people often misunderstand what 12th house energy truly is. It’s a spiritual love, a telepathic connection. It’s when you meet someone and feel like you can read their mind. It’s when you feel an inexplicable familiarity, as though you’ve known them in a past life. It’s soulmate energy, often tied to karmic lessons and spiritual growth. This is the type of love where you might dream about each other before even meeting or have dreams that predict the circumstances of your first encounter. It’s a connection where you feel deeply attuned to one another’s energy, where simply being in each other’s presence feels like entering another dimension. Words often fail to capture the depth of this connection because it’s not a verbal or physical relationship—it’s intuitive and telepathic. This type of bond is reflected in relationships where couples explore spirituality together. They might meditate for hours, burn incense, study astrology, or discuss esoteric topics. It’s a relationship that transcends the physical and focuses on the soul. You see past each other’s flaws and physical appearance, loving the person’s essence unconditionally. In a 12th house relationship, you often want to escape from the world together. This isn’t a connection where you want to be surrounded by crowds or in busy, chaotic environments. Instead, you crave solitude with this person—whether that’s staying at home, retreating to a cabin in the woods, or finding some secluded, peaceful place to be together. Even intimacy in this relationship feels deeper than the physical. It’s about unlocking parts of your subconscious and evolving together. You help each other discover more about yourselves, exploring hidden facets of your being and diving into the depths of your soul. The 12th house often leads to relationships where you avoid focusing on practical matters. Instead, you want to engage in hobbies, dance, play, or simply escape reality together. This avoidance of the practical is what makes the 12th house dangerous for romance—it lacks boundaries and isn’t rooted in the physical world. It’s boundless, spiritual, and open, which can feel both freeing and unsettling. Ultimately, the 12th house is about a love that transcends reality, existing in a realm of its own.

( Relationships where someone’s personal planet falls in my 12th house are really hard to manage. Often, you’re not even prepared for what that relationship brings. I had an ex with their personal planet in my 12th house, and we kept coming together. There was so much between us—he’d walk me to the train station, call me all the time, and we were great with intimacy. But I had intense feelings I couldn’t understand. That’s the thing with 12th house energy—it’s confusing. You can love someone deeply and feel close to them, but sometimes the lines blur, and you can’t figure out how you really feel. The 12th house energy is internal, spiritual, and psychological, not as physical. Sometimes, you feel so close to someone, yet distant at the same time. There’s a lot of weirdness in these relationships. You end up talking about things you’ve never discussed with others, and sometimes you find yourself attracted to the person in a way you’re not used to. You care deeply, but it’s hard to express that care. This energy also requires a lot of alone time. You feel like you can only truly be yourself with each other. When you’re around other people, you act differently. It can be a very private relationship where you don’t share many details about each other or the connection. The relationship just happens, and you keep it to yourselves. There can be weird tension when you’re together, as it feels like you’re picking up on each other’s emotions without knowing how to interpret them. Trust issues often come up, and the energy can feel confusing. In one situation, I literally thought, “This is my soulmate,” but at the same time, I felt the need to get away from him. It’s a confusing, isolated energy. These relationships do best when they exist in their own world, but trying to bring others into it can cause problems. There’s a lot of love and care in 12th house connections, but it’s not always easy for others to understand.)

💜My favorite aspects in synastry are trines and oppositions. The reason I love trines is that they come naturally. There’s nothing you need to do in the relationship to create that element—it simply exists when you’re with this person. It’s like being with your mom, who naturally wants to make food for you, nourish you, and pamper you. You don’t have to ask her every day, “Can you make me food?” She just comes home, whips up a pot, and serves it to you. That’s the energy of a trine—effortless, nurturing, and harmonious. Oppositions, on the other hand, remind me of a defiant child. For example, a child might insist on touching a hot stove despite their parent’s warnings. They’re so set in their thoughts and feelings that they ignore the warning, touch the stove, and get burned. Then the parent says, “I told you so.” Oppositions are about growth. They challenge you to expand your perspective and adapt to new ways of thinking, feeling, and living. For example, a naturally passive person might enter a relationship with someone assertive. While the passive individual may have always “gotten away” with their passivity, this relationship teaches them that they must assert themselves at times. They learn a life lesson through this dynamic. That’s why I appreciate oppositions—they foster personal development and growth.Now, sextiles are not my favorite because they feel underutilized. To me, sextiles are like having a talent or hobby you enjoy, such as digital art. You love creating digital art, but you’re too busy with responsibilities to actually pursue it. A sextile is similar—it’s an energy that doesn’t naturally show up in a relationship unless you consciously decide to activate it. That can be frustrating, especially if life is too chaotic or busy to make use of the potential. You might experience small glimpses of the energy, but it doesn’t fully manifest, leaving you feeling unfulfilled.As for squares, I don’t like them because they feel overly contentious. Squares remind me of a Karen—the type of person you see in viral videos, arguing with strangers in public or refusing to learn, change, or compromise. They’re stuck in their ways, and no amount of reasoning or problem-solving will get through to them. Instead, they escalate situations, creating unnecessary tension and conflict. In a relationship, a square feels like constant resistance, drama, and pushback. It’s exhausting and difficult to navigate, which is why I avoid squares as much as possible.

💚I think it’s important to also look at the aspects and the signs involved. A lot of people might say something like, “Oh, my Venus conjuncts my partner’s Venus!” but overlook the fact that both Venuses are in Gemini. If you’re looking for that romantic, ooey-gooey love story, and your Venuses are conjunct in Gemini, well, it’s not the same as you might expect. Gemini isn’t a traditionally romantic sign. It’s a sign that focuses on duality, intellect, versatility, creativity, and sociability—it’s not centered on romance.If your Venus is conjunct someone else’s Venus, but it’s in a sign that values intellect and versatility over deep emotional connection, what does that mean for your relationship? And more importantly, is that what you want in a relationship? That’s why I don’t place a lot of weight on conjunctions alone. For instance, if your Venus is conjunct someone else’s Venus in Pisces or Cancer, that’s different because those are more emotionally-centered, romantic signs. But if your Venus is conjunct in Aquarius, for example, Aquarius represents innovation, progressiveness, and community. Sure, you both might value free thinking, but that doesn’t necessarily translate to romance.When analyzing a chart, you need to consider the signs, not just the aspects like conjunctions, trines, or sextiles. The signs tell you how the energy of the aspect will manifest. Otherwise, you might enter a relationship thinking, “We have so many romantic aspects!” only to realize that they’re not as romantic as you thought when you dig deeper. For example, let’s say your Mercury is in Aries and your partner’s Mercury is in Libra. This creates an opposition. You might immediately think, “Oh no, we’re going to argue all the time.” And yes, that can be true. Most people don’t know how to navigate relationships, whether interpersonal or romantic, in a healthy way. Many people are still maturing, learning, and, honestly, in need of therapy. So yes, even a single opposition can create tension in your relationship because as a species, we’re not always emotionally evolved enough to handle relationships harmoniously from the start.If you’re naturally fast to speak and your partner is slow and methodical, that opposition will come up again and again in conversations. It’s inevitable. But that doesn’t mean the relationship is doomed—it just means that oppositions highlight areas where growth and compromise are necessary. Relationships are part of our evolutionary process, and most of what we learn about ourselves happens through those challenges. That’s why I don’t believe in a perfect synastry chart. Do I think there are synastry charts that favor romance and foster loving, emotionally deep, and physically intimate relationships? Absolutely. But people often romanticize aspects like “His Venus conjuncts my Venus—he’s my soulmate!” without considering the nuances. For example, if both Venuses are in Leo, you might struggle with pride and ego clashes, constantly feeling like the other person is wrong and you’re right. That kind of energy requires work and self-awareness.In synastry, it’s crucial to acknowledge that as humans, we’re still evolving emotionally. Relationships will inevitably reflect tricky elements from the chart. And no matter how many positive aspects exist, challenging ones like oppositions will have an impact. It’s up to us to decide whether we’re willing to grow through those challenges or not.

💘 Lastly, some people’s charts simply aren’t geared toward romance, so their relationships are going to look a bit different. For instance, there are people with very heavy Earth charts. Earth energy is practical and focused on everyday life, routine, work, and responsibilities—it’s not naturally inclined toward romance. The same applies to Air signs. Air signs prioritize intellect, communication, and social connections over traditional romantic gestures. In contrast, Fire and Water signs tend to be more romantic, at least from my perspective. People with strong Fire and Water placements crave romance. They want the cheesy, heartfelt gestures. They’re drawn to passion, intimacy, and the idea of partnership. Fire and Water individuals often seek traditional or deeply emotional connections. On the other hand, someone with a heavy Air chart might not want a traditional relationship. They may prefer a bond centered on intellectual connection or friendship rather than emotional depth or physical closeness. Similarly, someone with a heavy Earth chart may desire a relationship but also value personal space. They might not be interested in moving in together or merging every aspect of their lives.

💛This is why it’s so important to understand both your own needs and the needs of the other person. For example, I have a water-based chart, so I need that emotional connection. I also have a fire influence, which means I crave passion and excitement. Not everyone is going to need or value the same things in a relationship. Before diving into synastry, it’s helpful to ask the other person questions like:

• Do you care about romance?

• How do you feel about commitment?

• Do you want to get married someday?

• Are you looking for a soulmate?

• How deep do you want love to be in your life?

• In friendships, what do you value most? Hobbies? Going to events? Daily conversations?

These questions can reveal a lot about someone’s priorities and expectations. When you pair that with synastry, it becomes easier to see how a relationship might play out. Sometimes, what people call “unrequited love” is just a mismatch in romantic inclinations. For instance, there’s this growing sentiment that men aren’t courting women as much anymore, but I think a lot of men just aren’t naturally romantic. These might be men who don’t see the value in grand gestures like flowers or serenades. Instead, they express commitment by simply being present or spending time together—but they’re not especially affectionate or expressive. Looking at a person’s chart can give insight into this. If you’re dating someone with the Moon in Aquarius, can you really expect the same level of romanticism as someone with a Moon in Pisces? Or if someone has a Pisces rising, they may approach love with sensitivity and idealism, whereas a Capricorn rising might prioritize pragmatism and stability over emotional expression.I once knew someone who valued friendships far more than romantic relationships. He was mainly interested in physical intimacy and wasn’t emotionally invested in long-term commitments. Understanding these differences is crucial when dating. You need to ask yourself:

• Am I okay with someone who’s more focused on casual connections?

• Or am I looking for a deep, long-term commitment?

Thank you for viewing my post💛👋

#astroblr #astrology #astro notes #astro observations #astro placements #astro community #synastry #love #friends #astro love #astro questions #astro rants #astro reading #astro thoughts #astro posts

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gabrielsbubblegumbitch · 11 months ago

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this may be hard to answer because we don’t actually know the characters too well yet, but what do you think vox and val actually *love* about eachother? it seems like it’s more than just sex between them, and i’m curious to know what you think their relationship is like outside the toxic or sexual parts

Anon, to me it is not hard to answer at all, I think about it constantly 🩵❤️ of course all I write is based mostly on my headcanons and interpretations.

So... What Vox loves about Valentino? First and foremost, he makes him feel free. Vox is very self-conscious; he has a lot of internalized shame that he tries to cover with his grandiosity and fake smile. Valentino is unapologetically himself, and no matter how annoying it can be, Vox admires it. He's like the least judgmental person, and except for his temper tantrums, he's quite chill. Vox can't handle something? Val doesn't care; he still thinks his boyfriend is smart and will figure shit out eventually. Vox discovers he's into some weird, socially unacceptable kink? Great, they can try it. Vox rambles for hours about sharks? Good, he has a passion; Valentino likes people with passion, he will listen, he likes his voice anyway. Vox, who has spent his whole life crafting this perfect narrative about himself, cherishes the opportunity to feel comfortable enough with other people (a lot of these things apply also to his friendship with Velvette) to act like an absolute idiot around them.

Also, I think Valentino can be a really amazing boyfriend - he can be funny, charming, and mindful of the other person. That's his whole thing; he deals with desires, and that's why people get addicted to him so quickly. In most cases, it inevitably ends with him taking absolute control over the other person and becoming abusive. But Vox is his partner, so he gets just those nice bits because Valentino knows he wouldn't be able to put him down like he did with Angel. Not that he'd want to; he likes having a partner who's equal to him, whom he can break only if he allows him to do so (yes, my reading of them is very BDSM-ish, don't @ me). Valentino wants to be loved, he loves the idea of love, surrounds himself with hearts but at the same refuses to adjust to societal norms in the way that makes him unlovable; every person he ever loved (in his mind, his obsessive desire equals love) rejected him eventually after he revealed his true nature to them. But not Vox. Vox accepts him as broken as he is, and despite all his toxicity, Vox is reliable, he's the most stable part of Valentino's life. He has the patience to deal with his mood swings, he can always find the solution when Val messes something up, he's willing to accept all the attention Valentino wants to give him, and he supports his passions (ruining lives, making weird porn and abusing people).

Essentially, their love is largely about finally finding the other person who is as bad as you are, who accepts you no matter what and helps you grow (become an even worse person).

And some additional things:

Valentino really likes how smart Vox is. He himself is impulsive and acts instantly on his urges because violence is always an answer so he's kinda impressed when Vox presents him with some elaborate plots.

Vox loves Valentino's creativity, aesthetic, and attention to detail. He really likes nice things, but he lacks the ability to understand the nuance that is necessary for creating art.

They both enjoy each other's sense of humor.

Vox really likes that Valentino is kinda dumb? He can take care of him, and he likes taking care of people because it allows him to prove himself as The Best Boyfriend. He doesn't necessarily gets the idea of unconditional love, so the fact that he has an opportunity to earn it makes him feel more secure in their relationship. That's also why he loves spoling Valentino with gifts which is perfect because Valentino loves being spoiled.

Valentino likes being a little silly when he's with Vox. At work he can't manage people with his competence, so he does it with fear. But yelling and throwing people around is exhausting; he sometimes wants to bedazzle his gun while watching some trashy reality TV and bitching about his hard day at work. It's okay because Vox is also a little silly.

Valentino generally helps Vox live life more. He helped him come out of the closet (in my headcanon Vox for his whole life struggled with internalized biphobia); shows him that emotions other than anger are acceptable and don't mean weakness; even small things like always insisting on getting nice meals (while Vox could live his whole life on black coffee and rice) or decorating their apartment with fancy yet useless stuff.

They're both power-crazy maniacs, so the idea of being with someone who is widely desired by others and could destroy them if they wished is just so incredibly hot.

Vox | Valentino | What they hate about each other

If you liked these you should definitely check out my fic

#vox #hazbin hotel #valentino #voxval #vox hazbin #ask #valentino hazbin hotel #staticmoth

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cometcrystal · 4 months ago

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pondering a lot about THAT'S THE NORM! and now i'm formulating an actual suzy & norm friendship. here are some scenarios

SCENARIO 1

suzy has just turned 16. candace is no longer her nemesis (because having a nemesis is a two-way street - suzy learned that during a seminar). she is applying for an internship at LOVEMUFFIN (she would have applied earlier and easily been accepted, but for legal reasons, they don't accept interns under 16). as part of her application, she has to carry out and document an evil scheme of her choosing.

idk what the exact scheme would be because this is just a conceptual post about character dynamics but she begins looking at classifieds for henchman listings. she'd much rather do it all by herself, but she is still Tiny and not physically strong at all, so she needs some muscle on short notice. she sees a "henchman for hire - will accept hamster food as payment" listing under the name Norm Doofenshmirtz, and gets in touch with him because he can lift up to 15 tons

when they first meet, she's initially put off by his general norm-ness, so she just assigns him to his muscle duties and goes on with her plan. but throughout the day, he suggests ideas and does things that actually ENHANCE the plan's evilness, and she is very impressed. hypothetical episode ends with "norm, i think this is the beginning of a beautiful henchmanship"

SCENARIO 2

suzy works towards helping norm become a Real Boy because it's something he's wanted for such a long time, and she doesn't mind doing him a favor. she generates him a brainless, soulless, humanoid flesh vessel from DNA she obtained from a barber shop, and transfers his consciousness to a mechanical brain which she puts in the vessel's skull.

he very quickly finds out that being a human sucks actually. he doesn't like actually HAVING to sleep instead of just shutting off. he doesn't like the sensation of chewing food. etc etc. PLUS, he still feels the same on the inside. he still thinks the same as he did in his original body, still feels the same emotions.

he goes back to his robot self pretty quickly and very happily says "let's never speak of this again!" and suzy is like "agreed" and dissolves the flesh vessel in a vat of acid. yes i recognize this is like a horror movie. yes i think the dwampyverse is messed up enough for this to be plausible

SCENARIO 3

suzy saves norm from being permanently deactivated/destroyed somehow. as they're fleeing the scene, norm is like "ms. johnson, you saved me!" and she's like "of course i did. you're my best friend."

(suzy is not very popular in school and she prefers it that way, but norm is the first time she's ever experienced having a long-lasting friendly relationship with someone that wasn't related to her)

she pauses. "we are friends, right?" he cries a motor oil tear. "now i know i have a heart. because it's growing!"

#pnf #phineas and ferb #suzy johnson #norm #norm the robot

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theotterpenguin · 8 months ago

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the performative accusation that shipping zutara (and occasionally this criticism is levied at jinko/zukka) is colonialist apologism has been addressed in some excellent posts, explaining the inaccuracies and problematic implications of this logic far better than i ever could - like this post and this one and this one and this one and this one.

and i know this topic has been talked about to death, but if you could indulge my contribution for a moment, i just find it interesting how this sentiment results from the cognitive dissonance of atla fans being unable to reconcile with the idea of their favorite show's political beliefs not lining up with their own.

atla is a largely philosophical children's show that at its core deals with themes of love, redemption, and destiny vs. free-will. atla examines these themes through an anti-colonalist, anti-imperalist lens that deconstructs the idea of racial divisiveness and the idea that people of different ethnicities are inherently different. this is message is pretty explicitly stated by guru pathik:

Guru Pathik: "The greatest illusion of this world is the illusion of separation. Things you think are separate and different are actually one and the same." Aang: "Like the four nations?" Guru Pathik: "Yes. We are all one people. But we live as if divided."

and also by uncle iroh:

"It is important to draw wisdom from many different places. If you take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale. Understanding others, the other elements and the other nations will help you become whole."

this theme is developed across three full seasons, with the crux of this message culminating in zuko's friendships with the gaang - despite coming from different nationalities and different backgrounds, they have all had their own experiences being hurt by the fire nation and work together to take down the oppressive fire nation government. the question of destiny vs. free will is also explored through zuko's character - despite starting off as an antagonist, he develops into a symbolic representation of how the fire nation's oppression hurts its own citizens. he unlearns the fire nation's imperialist propaganda while simultaneously unlearning his father's abuse. rather than following misguided beliefs of what he thought his destiny was as the heir to the throne, instead he forges his own path.

thus, to claim that zuko can never form a deep and meaningful relationship with any of the gaang because of his nationality goes unequivocally against the themes of the show. and a major part of this is because these are fictional characters being used to analyze different theoretical questions within the show and in some cases, are used as symbolic representations of different philosophical ideas - their friendships and their character arcs serve a purpose within the text that cannot be easily transcribed onto real-life dynamics between people.

it's illogical to criticize fans who are choosing to understand atla at the level of the themes that are presented by the text - who are interested in exploring similar philosophical questions brought up by the show through the context of relationships.

if you don't like the themes of forgiveness and redemption that atla explores, your criticism should be aimed at the writing of the show itself rather than other fans. because you are giving far more thought to the "implications" of a close friendship or romantic relationship between someone from an imperalist nation and someone from an oppressed nation than the writers ever did. (and if you fall in this camp of people, i would hope you wouldn't be reblogging fanart of zuko and the gaang together while simultaneously claiming zuko could can never escape the sins of his ancestors and can never form a deep relationship based on trust and intimacy with katara or sokka or jin - because that would just be hypocritical).

and as a side note, people seem to apply this flawed logic to zutara far more than other ships solely because the show spends the most time exploring the complicated nature of fire nation imperalism in the interactions between zuko and katara in the latter half of b3. this is because they've been juxtapositioned against each other and paralleled with aang since the beginning of the show in ways that toph, sokka, and suki are not, who have mostly been used to examine different themes. there simply isn't enough time to explore these complicated themes with all the other characters, even if they theoretically exist in zuko’s dynamics with these characters, so the writers focus the most on zuko's relationships with katara and aang, and these relationships are given far more narrative weight, so have more content to criticize. but zuko and katara also canonically become friends by the end of the show. if you want to discount the existence of their friendship, claiming that it will always be tainted by the fire nation's oppression regardless of what is shown in the text, then you also have to discount zuko's friendships with aang, suki, toph, and sokka - because even if this isn't shown as a permanent barrier to their friendships in the show, it’s also not shown as a permanent barrier to his friendship with katara. if your logic is solely based on the idea that a person's identity in a relationship as a colonizer or a victim is fixed and unchanging regardless of character development, this would apply to zuko's friendships with everyone else as well.

#zuko #katara #zutara #i have seen people say that the zutara dynamic makes them personally uncomfortable and that's fine - to each their own!#but it's hypocritical to only dislike zuko's relationship with katara while simultaneously exalting his friendships w aang or toph or sokka #just because the show doesn’t take as much time to explore these issues with other characters doesn’t mean the same dynamic doesn’t apply #my post #my meta

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blueishspace · 2 months ago

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Scott says Pearl's memory is selective so I rewatched her DL pov.

And he's kinda right? But also is doing much of the same thing.

Part 1/3

Episode 1 p.1 Communication and Strategy.

Let's start from the basic thing everyone even non fans with friends that are into the series know. Scott abandoning Pearl.

...

Which is something he doesn't do, not really at least, that would imply that they were allied in some way and he left. He might be her soulmate but that does not mean he has to team with her. By all counts It's simply a game mechanic and nothing more, she isn't entitled to an alliance with him. Sure there's an expectation for it to happen but it is not a rule, you can't abandon something you never had.

What about Last Life? It doesn't matter, not when it comes to Pearl, alliances almost never stick trough different seasons. It matters to Cleo and Scott: One of the reasons Scott and Cleo teamed up was because in Last Life they didn't have the chance to be in the alliance for as much as they wanted since Cleo had died and gone to red and then Scott went to red soon after Cleo went back to yellow. It was an alliance decided and agreed upon based on the fact they both felt robbed by the previous season. But the same doesn't apply to Pearl, it could have had she met them and talked to them about it but she didn't and so they likely interpreted it as her not caring about it.

Pearl interprets it as abandonment because ahe came in late, she doesn't understand the way the life series works yet. She expected the alliance and friendship to last from the previous season, it is not her fault either. It is entitlement born not out of selfishness but by a lack of communication.

Pearl THINKS Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss has value because she sees Scott and Cleo together but she lacks the context for that and ends up using it as a reason fro Scott to not reject her, at the same time Scott feels that Pearl doesn't care and is expecting his loyalty because of a game mechanic neither has control over and even worse, at least by his standards, an old alliance. He has a very weird definition of what loyalty is but it's something he cares about strongly and it something vital to his character.

And Scott is definitely is hurt by Pearl's actions and It's really really obvious: Scott is a man of logic, he is rational, he sees he only has a life left and decides not to do a boogie kill because he might just die and go to red anyway, he sacrifices himself again and again to give his teammates better chances, ge does not care... But there he does something strategically stupid, not teaming with the person who's health he shares. He is emotionally hurt by what he percieves to be Pearl's lack of care, this is the first time since third life he acts out of emotion over logic. From Cleo's pov we see how much he panic when he realizes he's bonded to Pearl and that she is in the nether.

And even when Scott comes back to say something extra he doesn't target Pearl, he uses the horn to annoy Martyn. From his pov it is Pearl that betrayed him but he decides to be mean to Martyn instead of her. I think this says a lot more then words van about how he viewed this thing.

Episode 1 p.2 Cleo and Martyn are assholes.

Oh boy, those two on the other hand made everything much worse for Pearl.

Martyn ACTUALLY betrayed and abandoned Pearl, unlike Scott he wa working together with her. She had reason to expect him to stick with her especially after they were both refused by their soulmate partners. But he doesn't, despite everything, despite knowing she didn't take Scott's rejection well he still leaves her alone. Pearl does not actually begin to spiral when Cleo and Scott choose eachother over their soulmates, she begins to spiral only once Martyn decides that's it better to leave, when he decides being alone is better then being with her.

And Cleo... she eggs them both Scott and Pearl on so much. Like at least Scott tries to be civil and explain himself at the start but Cleo... well she is ruder during the entire conversation.

Even worse, most of the escalation is done by Cleo and Martyn getting louder at eachother and drowning out Scott's and Pearl's arguments. If the previous part was about how Scott's and Pearl's situation happened because of miscommunication then this is to say that it happened because Cleo and Martyn made it virtually impossible for communication to actually happen.

Episode 2 p.1: Snow and Scar(s)

I think everyone knows how it wasn't Pearl that came up with the powdered snow bit, it was started by Scar as a way to mess with Grian...

And not only that. Everyone usually thinks about the homewreckers during Double Life but Scar during the season does a lot of things towards making other soulmates pair distrust eachother, he's the one that makes the chicken games and I think he knows full well what he's doing. He knows what happened to Pearl and gives her a way to make it worse knowing that she is going to use it. And she does.

It does take a bit for Scott to notice, after at first he assumes she's just walking into powdered snow by accident... it takes a bit for him to suspect but what sticks with is so much she damages him. Also Scar actively searches for him to give him the snow too which makes things way worse.

And she does a lot of damage. First 4 hearts, then another 6 hearts. She does not eat to spite Scott but this only justifies him in his mind. She justifies herself saying that he has been taking damage so It's fair. Yet when she takes a bunch of damage getting goat horns and he steps in powdered snow using THE SAME EXACT LOGIC as her she takes it personally... And that It's because It's not actually logic, It's both them justifying their actions to themselves over admitting their mistakes and doing so in the same way...

Episode 2 p.2 How it could have been resolved and yet wasn't.

Still when Scott approaches Pearl soon after he's...civil. They aren't mean to eachother, sure Pearl says she's broken hearted but she's the only one that is antagonistic about it Scott actually feels bad about Tilly dying and he tries to explain himself and tries to make small talk... And he manages it, they talk and both of them still think they are in the right but things are fixable at this point in time. Scott explains the damage he's taken and while Pearl doesn't fully believe him It's a start.

And especially Scott says that he and Cleo had bonded the last session and when Pearl says that he can bond more he says that's It's going to take time. This means Pearl still wants a chance to be on a team with Scott and Scott still doesn't hate such an idea. They are still stuck blinded in their own head but in another timeline they are on a team already from the next session.

Except Scott accidentally says "Mine and Pearl's" instead of "Mine and Cleo's" when talking about his base. And Pearl starts manically claiming their base as her own... And CLEO is the one to first say that she's insane. (Cleo: I think she's lost it. Scott: I don't think she ever had it.) And this insane thing is going to stick with Pearl for the rest of the series.

Cleo is a big part because of how she deals with both Scott's and Pearl. She is probably the person Scott trusts the most other then himself and she completely supports him, she completely agrees with him on everything he says. Scott is functionally in an echo chamber in this season. A very sassy one considering their personalities.

Cleo also worsens Pearl this session...surprisingly while trying to help. She genuinely seems to be trying, she's careful and deliberate, subtly implies she should less alone and then states that just because they aren't on the same team doesn't mean Pearl can't be with someone else. She lacks the sarcasm that's usually in her voice and she seems to be genuinely trying to get Pearl to find allies for herself and not be alone...Since her and Scott chose eachother outside the bonds she too could choose to be with who she wanted. But Pearl doesn't listen and all she gets from it is convincing herself to be even more isolated.

The last nail in the coffin has to be Ren and BigB though, they die and immediately accuse her of being a villain a demoness and sorrounded by misfortune. Scott was defensive and Martyn was evasive and Cleo was sarcastic and Scar was manipulative but out of my entire rewatch of Pearl's pov this far it was the worst moment from Pearl's perspective. The most damage done to Pearl in Double Life was given by Ren.

Episode 3 Why is it Scar again, doesn't he have better things to do?

So we have found that Pearl's spiral was started by Martyn and worsened by Scar and then cleo and then Ren and bow It's Scar's turn again. Because session 2 ends with Pearl saying she was just wanting to help and session 3 starts with Scar convincing her to be actively a threat. He manipulated her into ruining the relationship with Scott once and now he's making her become what Ren said she was. So he can sell her stuff.

Now she meets again with Cleo and Scott and well... Nothing of particular importance happens in this one. Except one thing that Scott's says. (Scott's very infamous line "It's hard but once you widdle him down to nothing it works" about Jimmy is given It's actual context and it seems to not refer to Jimmy's self esteem at all so I don't know where that came from. ) Which gives Pearl the idea to annoy Scott even more.

Also important thing that happens soon is Scott saying sorry to Pearl without any sarcasm for taking damage as an olive branch and then suddenly shutting up as he processes that Pearl just created a dirt hut on his bridge. Even he doesn't tell her to take it down but suggests talking to Cleo about it since they build it. Pearl then suggests killing Cleo and even then Scott tries to calm her down by saying she can't because she is green. Pearl actually in canon comments that Scott is really nice to her and then Ren and Martyn fake burning down her base to get her attention.

#trafficblr #traffic smp #pearlescentmoon #scott smajor #goodtimeswithscar #martyn inthelittlewood #zombiecleo #rendog #bigbst4tz2

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freyaphoria · 4 months ago

Text

His Moral Loyalty

a/n: I adapted Mingi's little jealousy argument with Yunho for reader. I hope you felt the angst! I wrote the actual conversations between Yunho and Mingi in bold letters. Also, I didn't forget to write the second part of passion of punishment. Thank you for the interest you left in my inbox about that fic. And i don't know why i used cyberpunk theme, it was so irrelevant. AND Can you please find me another title for this?

tw: angst!!!!, jealous!Mingi, friends to maybe strangers, reader is very wrong here, lots of angst

wc: 2021

taglist: @aim-blossom @oddracha @bambisd0ll @peqchplvto (I love you guys so much♡)

“I can’t believe you.” You were sure Mingi was really exaggerating and twisting things, but somehow he still managed to make you feel guilty. His voice was low, emotional, and shaky as he tried not to make eye contact, looking down at the floor instead. He felt as if his entire world had collapsed around him. Yes, he knew you loved him as a friend, but it still hurt him deeply that you weren’t prioritizing him. "For God's sake, Mingi, why are you upset about it?" You finished applying eyeshadow and closed the eyeshadow palette angrily. It was like you were constantly dealing with a child, a child who couldn't share his mother with his siblings. You felt your patience wearing thin, and without realizing it, the nails of your fist were digging into your palms. He was rocking back and forth in place, still trying to digest what he perceived as your ‘betrayal’.

"I mean... I mean why?" you stammered, thinking that your previous tone of voice was too harsh and loud, you decided to soften your approach. This time, you tried to talk to him gently, hoping not to scare him. You took a deep breath, attempting to calm yourself down. On the other hand, you were still trying to continue with your makeup, meticulously applying highlighter and blending it evenly. You glanced at him in the mirror, noticing the conflicted emotions written all over his face. “I asked you to go to dinner together first.” You were used to your best friend being jealous of your other friends. But this time, Mingi looked truly hurt. He had wanted to take you to this dinner so badly, he had finally mustered up the courage to tell you he loved you and jeopardize your friendship, but the 'I'm sorry Min, I promised Woo' text from you had ruined all of his plans and destroyed his motivation. He had been planning this dinner date for weeks, imagining how he would confess his feelings to you over a candlelit dinner, hoping you would feel the same way.

Were you provoking him by wearing make up in front of him? Yes. Were you going to wear his favorite cement-colored mini dress in front of him for Wooyoung? Also yes. Why? Because Mingi wouldn’t leave you alone and you wanted to annoy him in your own way. So that he can leave you alone for a bit and let you have fun with your other friends. You couldn’t help but feel a little guilty, seeing the pain in his eyes, but you were determined to make your point. The tension between you two had been building for a while, and you were both too stubborn to back down. "Woo made a promise with his friends. We'll all go together. I don't go out to dinner alone with him." You took one last look at your makeup in the mirror, ensuring every detail was perfect, and got up from your makeup table to look at your phone, saw that you had a text from Wooyoung.

“All right, that’s how you do it.” You were about to open the messages when Mingi’s annoying tone got on your nerves again. “You're starting to get jealous again, do you realize that-?”

“It’s not jealousy.” He waved his hands at you in frustration. “I’m not jealous, this is...” It was cute how he spoke to you without ever making eye contact, stumbling over his words. “What then? Are you upset?” The phone in your hand was still waiting for the new messages from Wooyoung to open. He had probably left home and was coming to your house to pick you up.

As Mingi tried to carefully choose what to say, his emotional breakdown and frustration caused the words to come out of his mouth on their own. “I prioritize relationships with people.” This time, he was looking into your eyes with such intensity and depth, as if he was trying to convey unspoken feelings. He was completely focused on you, his gaze unwavering. “And you abandoned my moral loyalty.” he said, his voice filled with a mix of pain and accusation.

The weight of his words hung heavily in the air, making the moment feel even more intense. Your eyes were wide. You knew that Mingi felt emotions deeply, but you hadn’t guessed that he felt them this deeply. Also, the fact that he expressed how he felt showed that his patience had reached its limit and he couldn’t hold his emotions in anymore. "Mingi, it was a simple plan. He planned it and I said okay, why are you making it such a big deal?" All your attention was now on Mingi, whose eyes were on the verge of tears. He had cried in front of you before, but it wasn't because of you. “I planned it since I was in the 9th grade of middle school!” Mingi could no longer control his words and his shaking body. The accumulated admiration of all those years and the thought that you valued Wooyoung more than him caused him to lose control of his words and let them come out of his mouth on their own. You were surprised by his words and didn't understand. What was he planning?

“Plan what?” The room was filled with the sounds of Wooyoung’s incoming text messages and Mingi’s shaky breathing. The tension in the room was palpable, almost suffocating.

“Everything I do with you.” His eyes followed your voice, which came out in a quiet and timid tone, as he turned away from you again. He made up a lie because he couldn't share his plan to tell you he loved you, which he had been planning for years.

You froze for a few seconds, trying to process his words. He planned everything? Hadn't you already done so many things together over the years? What else could he possibly have planned? A multitude of thoughts raced through your mind. “Mingi, you spend a lot of time with me. What more do you want?” You said, your voice tinged with confusion and curiosity. Mingi bowed his head this time, a gesture that seemed to carry the weight of his feelings. “So you forgot how precious it is because we spend a lot of time together and you’re so used to it?”

He was right. What he said was very impressive and cut deep into your conscience. You didn't have an answer to that because, yes, you sometimes forgot. Your 7-year friendship was starting to seem very ordinary and boring to you, but you always cared about Mingi. His recent overly obsessive behavior was making you distance yourself from him.You began to reflect on the many moments you had shared. The late-night talks, the shared secrets, the laughter, and even the arguments. Each memory now seemed to carry a different weight, a different significance. Mingi's words had opened a door to a part of your past that you had overlooked. You realized how much he had invested in this friendship, how much he had planned and cherished every moment.

It was clear that his feelings went beyond mere friendship, and it pained you to see him so distressed. The room felt colder, the silence more pronounced, as you struggled to find the right words to say. You knew that whatever came next would change the dynamics of your relationship forever. You took a deep breath, trying to steady your thoughts, and prepared yourself for the conversation that lay ahead. “What are you saying? Of course you are precious to me.” You weren’t lying; he was still precious to you. He just seemed like a different person lately, someone unfamiliar yet still dear. His usual self, the Mingi you knew, would jump up and down with excitement whenever he heard a compliment from you, flashing his big, goofy smile that you adored. But right now, he wasn’t reacting at all, his expression vacant and distant.

“I mean, is it wrong to go out to dinner with my other friends?” you asked, turning your head to look at Mingi. You saw him leaning against the door frame, his eyes scanning you up and down. "Of course it's not wrong, what's wrong is that you don't prioritize me," he replied, trying so hard not to let the words he really wanted to say slip out. If you pushed his buttons a little more, he could confess that he loved you at any moment.

"I have always prioritized you over my friends throughout my life. I can't stay stuck with you for the rest of my life, Mingi," you responded. You have made countless mistakes in your life, but the mistake you just made was the worst. You wish you could turn back time by 3 seconds and not say those two sentences. You didn't mean to hurt him on purpose; his childish jealousy just got on your nerves, and you wanted to get on his nerves too.There was silence for about 10 seconds. In those 10 seconds, Mingi was broken, never to be mended again. He tried to collect himself, his body seemed to be speaking and moving on its own. He could feel the weight of your words pressing down on his chest, making it hard to breathe. Just as Mingi opened his mouth to say something, he was interrupted by a call from Wooyoung.

“Woo? Ok, I'm going downstairs.” You didn’t want to make eye contact with Mingi as you hung up the phone and picked up your bag from your bed. You knew you had disappointed him, hurt him, but you couldn’t always depend on him. You had other friends, and you were starting to get close to Wooyoung, and you didn’t want anyone to come between you and Wooyoung when everything was starting to go so well. Yes, this thought was very selfish and you were betraying Mingi, but still, falling in love was a very different and complicated feeling.

You could feel Mingi’s eyes on you, filled with unspoken words and emotions. As you walked out, you couldn’t shake the feeling that this moment was a turning point, one that might change everything between you two. You glanced back at him, feeling a pang of guilt. "I’m sorry, Mingi. We’ll talk later, I promise.” He didn’t respond, merely nodding with a vacant look in his eyes. He remained where he was, his silence speaking volumes about his hurt and disappointment. There was no attempt to stop you, no plea to stay—just a quiet acceptance of your leaving, as if he had expected it all along.

You closed the door softly behind you, leaving Mingi alone in the room, feeling the chill of the empty space you left behind. As you walked to meet Wooyoung, you could still feel the weight of his unspoken sorrow pressing heavily on you, a constant reminder of the pain you had caused. The night air was cool and crisp, but it did nothing to soothe the guilt gnawing at your conscience.

You thought about the times Mingi had been there for you, supporting you through thick and thin, always a steady presence in your life. No matter what you did, at the end of the day, Mingi would always be there for you. But this time, when you got home at who knows what time at night, Mingi wouldn’t be there waiting for you. The realization hit you hard, making your steps falter. The thought of returning to an empty house, devoid of his comforting presence, filled you with a deep sense of loss. You knew that things would never be the same again, and the path you had chosen was leading you further away from the one person who had always been your anchor.

a/n: You guys used to leave me lots of feedback. I miss those times TT_TT

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