#accidental love confessions
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wikiangela · 2 years ago
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I'd marry you with paper rings
another silly corny fluff, with a dash of pining and possessive Eddie, and friends to fiances ❤️
words: 3.4k
[read on Ao3]
“If we’re not married by the time we’re, like, forty, we should just marry each other.” he chuckles, and downs the rest of his beer. And Eddie… Eddie knows it’s a joke. Obviously. It can’t be anything but. But still, it does something to him. He’s thought about it, fantasized about it, but hearing it from Buck, even jokingly… “Why wait?” his tone is also teasing. He can play it off as a joke, while still looking for Buck’s reaction, for any indication about how he feels. (...) “Let’s just do it now and get it over with.” Or, Buck makes a joke that leads to an unplanned marriage proposal.
It’s a late evening, the house is quiet, Christopher is fast asleep already, having been tucked in by them both, was out like a light as soon as his head hit the pillow. The kitchen is dark, only the small light over the stove illuminating the space, while Buck and Eddie sit at the table, bottles of beer in hands.
One of Buck’s hands is fiddling with the edges of a few pieces of paper tucked away in the corner of the table, drawings Buck and Chris did while waiting for dinner, that Eddie cooked – they take turns now, and Eddie’s getting so much better. 
They had a late dinner today, because Buck was late – well, he wasn’t supposed to be here at all, to be honest. He had a date. Eddie tries to ignore the bitter, ugly feeling in his chest whenever he thinks about it. Similarly, he tries to fight the feeling of relief and satisfaction that Buck’s date apparently didn’t work out and he cut it short. To be with Eddie. With him and Chris. To come home to them. Well, he probably just didn’t like whoever he met and didn’t have anything else to do, but still. He’s here, and not with some random girl from a dating app. And Eddie’s happier than he should be that his best friend's dating isn’t going well.
To be fair, Eddie also had a date just last night, so who is he to talk. But it was awful. So now that’s what they’re talking about. How horrible they are at dating. While Eddie’s silently longing to be the one Buck takes out on a date, on many dates, that could lead to- he can’t hope. He can’t help that he does hope.
“So it didn’t go well?” Eddie sums up after Buck’s finished venting about how awful this date was. Another bad one. He’s been dating for a while now, and Eddie has tried to be supportive, but he feels like a piece of his heart is being ripped away with each date Buck tells him about.
“That’s an understatement.” Buck scoffs, taking another sip of his beer. “How about you? You didn’t tell me how your date went last night.” he asks, and Eddie cringes just thinking about it. He has no idea what he was thinking. It was just one date he reluctantly decided to go on when someone asked him out, because, well, he was tired. He’s still tired. He’s tired of feeling alone, of not having someone, and of Buck not realizing that he’s that someone Eddie wants. He was also very jealous, though he hates admitting that to himself.
“You know how I feel about dating.” Eddie responds, not looking at Buck, instead focusing on the beer in his hand, nail catching under the edge of the label. “It was weird and, uh, felt performative. I didn’t really feel like myself.” he shrugs, absentmindedly starting to peel the sticker away, it falls apart as he pulls at it, the condensation making it soggy. He focuses on that, it’s something to occupy his hands and eyes, and thoughts. “I don’t even know why I agreed to it.” he huffs, trying for a casual chuckle, but not quite getting it right.
“Yeah. I don’t know why I went back to dating, either.” Buck admits. “I just wanted to get back out there, you know? Maybe miraculously find someone I could maybe, eventually, settle down with.” he scoffs and shakes his head. “It’s so stupid.”
“It’s not stupid. We all just want-” he pauses and licks his lips nervously, averting his gaze again. “It’s okay to not want to be alone. To want to find a- a partner. Someone you can go through life with.” he muses quietly, trying to ignore the little voice in his head screaming that he already found his person. And that his partner is sitting right there, so close Eddie could just reach out and grab his hand and let him know… but he’s too scared. Not until he knows how Buck feels.
“I guess. I mean, that’s what I want. But it’s- it’s weird. The dates, I mean, they were all-  None of them really felt right.” Buck continues talking, and Eddie wants to stop the topic of Buck’s dating life. He doesn’t want to hear another thing, or he won’t be able to contain his jealousy and heartbreak anymore, and he’ll do or say something stupid that he'll regret. But they’re friends first, and friends talk about this stuff, right? He kind of hates it. “It kinda- it kinda made me feel like Buck 1.0 sometimes.” Buck adds, quietly and almost forcibly, like he doesn’t want to actually say it, a blush coloring his cheeks.
“What do you mean?” Eddie frowns.
“I mean, some of them see what I look like and only want to hook up.” he grumbles a bit, blushing, as if embarrassed. And, well, Buck knows what he looks like, and Eddie would be lying if he said he's not the hottest person he's ever seen. And on one hand, Eddie understands those girls, because what wouldn’t he do to have Buck like this, all to himself – but there’s so much more to him, and Eddie can’t comprehend how someone can take one look at that bright smile and those blue shining eyes, that hide so much sadness and hurt too – how someone can see that, and talk to him for a second, with his passion and facts and excitement, and so much kindness and compassion, and not want to get to know him better. “But it’s not like anyone would stay once they got to know me better anyway. No one ever does.” he adds bitterly, and it takes everything in Eddie not to grab him by the shoulders and shake him and scream that there is at least one person who will never leave him, who wants him just the way he is, while knowing him better than anyone. A person that sees all of him, the good, the bad and the ugly, and loves and wants it all, despite and because. 
“Buck.” Eddie doesn’t know what to say without spilling his whole heart.
“No, I know, I know. The right person will come along, right?” he shakes his head. “I don’t know. Dating is just hard. It’s hard to find someone you might even consider to want to spend your life with.” he sighs again, taking another sip of his beer. “It never goes far enough for that anyway.”
“Yeah. Dating is really not for me.” Eddie chuckles, because, yeah, he sucks at dating – not that he puts in much effort anyway, especially since his heart is already taken. “I wish I could just find a partner-” here’s that word again, and he sneaks a look at Buck to see if he picks up on it, on the connotation of it not only being a gender-neutral term, but also of Buck being his literal partner. At work, but still. “And settle down. Skip the whole dating part altogether.”
“Yeah.” they fall silent for a moment, before Eddie sees Buck smirk, and he knows he’s about to say something silly. “You know, we should make a pact.” he says, his tone clearly joking, and still a little bit bitter. “If we’re not married by the time we’re, like, forty, we should just marry each other.” he chuckles, and downs the rest of his beer. And Eddie… Eddie knows it’s a joke. Obviously. It can’t be anything but. But still, it does something to him. He’s thought about it, fantasized about it, but hearing it from Buck, even jokingly… 
Before he knows it, his lips are moving and he says:
“Why wait?” his tone is also teasing. He can play it off as a joke, while still looking for Buck’s reaction, for any indication about how he feels. And if he doesn’t feel the same, well, at least Eddie will know and he’ll stop torturing himself with hoping and wishful thinking and daydreaming about his best friend. Or he’ll try to stop, anyway. “Let’s just do it now and get it over with.”
“What?” Buck looks at him with a confused frown and a nervous chuckle.
“I mean, we’re almost there, anyway, just a few years away.” he shrugs, clearly leaning into the joke. Nothing more. Just a joke. It’s fine. It’s not like his heart is pounding a thousand miles a minute, and his face is hot – he’s pretty sure he’s blushing, and he can’t let himself think about Buck seeing that. If he asks, Eddie will claim it’s from the alcohol. No big deal. It’s plausible.
“Uh.” is all Buck says for probably just a few seconds, but the silence feels like it stretches into minutes, or hours, and Eddie’s hands are starting to sweat. Almost the entire sticker is in little pieces on the table right now. Buck doesn’t say anything more until Eddie looks at him, immediately meeting his piercing eyes. He wonders how long Buck’s been staring at him when he wasn’t looking. And tries to read his expression, that looks suspiciously like a hopeful and excited smile. “Okay.” he whispers, licking his lips and clearing his throat, the only indication of any nerves.
“What?” it’s Eddie’s turn to ask. His heart is hammering so hard, he’s almost scared it’s going to rip through his chest and fall onto the table in front of him.
“I mean,” Buck swallows audibly and licks his lips again, eyes not leaving Eddie’s. Eddie can’t even avert his gaze anymore, he feels pinned, frozen in place, sinking in the blue of Buck’s eyes. “Why not, right? We’re single, we know each other better than anyone else will ever know us. We work well together. We get along.” he shrugs, smile turning sheepish, tone turning to more teasing again. “I'm sure we’d make a good couple, too.”
“You think?” Eddie tries to smirk, but he’s not sure he’s succeeding. 
“Yeah. Plus, there’s another thing.” he bites his lip and looks over Eddie’s face, as if analyzing, gauging his reaction so far, wondering if he should say whatever he wants to say. Eddie lets himself hope that he knows what. 
“What's that?” Eddie thinks he’s leaning closer to Buck now. It’s involuntary, like he’s being pulled by some invisible force. He leans his elbow on the table, facing Buck.
“You know, I can’t say I never- I mean, the way I feel-” he pauses, closes his eyes and shakes his head. “Fuck, I am bad at this.” he mutters, and Eddie chuckles. He thinks he knows where Buck is going with this, and he relaxes a little bit. 
“Let me, then.” he puts his beer on the table, and then takes one of Buck’s hands. He’s not very good at it, either, but it’s Buck. Everything is easier with Buck, even the hard parts. Buck always makes him feel lighter, unburdened, like he can do anything. So he can do this. He takes a deep breath, and Buck’s wonderful eyes are back locked with his, shining with hope and uncertainty, and, well, what Eddie thinks and wants to be love, finally allowed to shine through, not hidden and concealed. Eddie allows himself to look at Buck the way he always does when Buck’s not looking, too, not bothering to school his expression. “I love you.” is what gets out of his mouth on an exhale, not evening meaning to say it. Buck’s eyes widen and fill with tears.
“Eddie.” he whispers, breath catching.
“I love you.” Eddie repeats with conviction. “I fell for you a long time ago, and I just keep falling deeper and deeper, and hearing about your dates is slowly killing me.” he admits, and Buck winces, looks like he’s about to apologize, but Eddie continues, “I don’t know where we go from here, but my heart belongs to you. I gave it to you with my son, years ago, and you can keep it forever if you want to. I love every little part of you, and I want you, I want it all. Forever. You’re my person. My partner. And-” his smile widens, turns more teasing, but still genuine, “I know we haven’t even gone on a date, but I would marry you tomorrow. Just say a word.” he finishes. He wishes he’d known this would happen, he could prepare, and now he had to wing it, and he hasn’t even scratched the surface of what he wants to say to Buck. But if this conversation goes where he thinks it’s going, he’ll have time. They’ll have all the time in the world.
“Who cares about dates.” is what Buck says with a watery laugh, his free hand comes up to cup Eddie’s cheek. “I love you so much, Eddie. I’m so in love with you, it physically hurts, knowing that I can’t have this- well, I guess I can now.” he chuckles again, a tone of disbelief in his voice. “For so long I was just trying to get over you, and here you are, saying you feel the same.” he shakes his head. “You and Chris are my whole world, and- and what we have- we don’t need to date, Eddie, I think we’re way past that. Let’s get married.”
“Seriously? Are you sure?” Eddie asks, feeling his cheeks starting to hurt from how wide his smile is. He feels himself leaning closer. Buck’s right, they don’t need dating, they’re far from a regular couple. They’ve been best friends, partners, even basically co-parents, for years. They’re so far ahead, it’s almost silly they’re not married already.
“Never been more serious or more sure about anything in my life. Please marry me?” he adds quietly but decisively. He’s closer now, too, their faces inches apart. Eddie’s gaze drifts between Buck’s eyes and lips.
“Yes.” Eddie answers, not quite believing that it’s happening yet. If this is a dream, he never wants to wake up. “Like I said, I’ll marry you tomorrow, or, hell, even tonight.”
“I’d love that.” Buck responds, his lips even closer, and Eddie’s aching to close the distance. “But Bobby would never forgive us if he didn’t get to officiate our wedding, we’ll have to hold off on that.” he adds, and they both laugh, as their lips finally meet for the first time.
Eddie imagined their first kiss many times over the years, in many different ways. He imagined it heated and desperate after a close call on a job, or drunken and sloppy after having one too many drinks when they’re out with the team. Or passionate and impatient, once he finally snaps and walks over and kisses Buck after he does something sweet and domestic, like cook dinner for them. And so many others – he’s fantasized about it way too much. 
But this one is soft and gentle, and almost hesitant at the beginning, before Eddie deepens it. It’s unhurried, exploring, and tender, and full of so much emotion, and love. If Eddie was even sappier and cornier than he is, he’d say he can feel his heart sing and dance with happiness, and he feels simultaneously lighter than air, and more grounded than he’s felt in years. He’s almost dizzy, intoxicated with Buck’s taste on his tongue, Buck’s skin under his fingers, where one of his hands is on Buck’s waist, sneaking under the shirt, while the other he places on the back of his neck. Both of Buck’s hands are framing his face, and his skin feels tingly wherever Buck touches it. It’s the best damn kiss of his life, and he never wants it to stop. Though he also can’t wait to share all the other kinds of kisses with Buck at some point.
In the end, Buck pulls away first, and Eddie chases after him, leaving one, two, three more lingering kisses, until Buck’s laughing, gently grabbing Eddie’s arms to keep him in place.
“Wait a second, Eddie.” he runs his hand through Eddie’s hair, looking at him with such fondness, Eddie almost melts on the spot. “I just realized something.”
“What?” he tilts his head in curiosity, but he also feels every nerve of his body longing for Buck. He needs him all over himself. Now that he got a taste, he can never look back, he wants more, more, more.
“We just got engaged, and I don’t even have a ring.”
“Who cares about a ring?” he dismisses, wanting to get back to kissing. But Buck frowns.
“Eddie. We need a ring. I need people to know that you’re taken.” he says, tone serious, and Eddie’s heart flutters. He’s Buck’s. 
“I’m yours.” he says out loud, tasting the words, almost in wonder. It feels right.
“Yeah. And we need to make it official.” he looks around the kitchen, and his gaze falls on the pieces of paper on the table. His face lights up. “Oh, I have an idea.”
Eddie watches, awed, as Buck goes through the drawings, finds one of his own, which consists of mostly multi-colored doodles, and rips two stripes away. Then, he folds it, a little awkwardly and hurriedly, and somehow makes them into two rings, measuring it against their fingers to get it right – Eddie’s amazed, because, for real, how does Buck know how to do everything? When he’s happy with it, he gets out of his chair and drops to one knee.
“Eddie Diaz, will you marry me?” he asks, beaming, and holding out one of the colorful rings. 
“I already said yes.” Eddie chuckles.
“I know. But I have a ring now. I mean, it’ll have to do until I get an actual ring.” he says, as he slides the ring onto Eddie’s finger.
“Come here.” he hunches down and grabs Buck’s chin, bringing his face closer. “You’re ridiculous. I love you.” and he kisses Buck, this time hard and passionate. It’s brief, over way too quickly, but he pulls away to grab the other ring and put it on Buck’s finger, as well. “Now it’s official. We’re getting married.” he adds, not able to contain a grin. He’s going to marry his best friend. It’s not a dream, not a fantasy, not wishful thinking. This is happening. His best friend, with whom he’s head over heels in love, loves him back, and they’re getting married.
“We’re getting married.” Buck repeats, his happy, giddy expression surely mirroring Eddie’s.
“How did we get here from talking about our terrible dates?” Eddie asks with a laugh, now only feeling satisfaction at the thought of Buck’s dates. He wins. He has Buck, all of him, body, heart and soul, forever. He’s Buck’s and Buck is his.
“Stop.” Buck groans, leaning his forehead against Eddie’s. “I didn’t know that you- but you do. You’re my partner, that I want to spend the rest of my life with.” he grins. “Uh, this-” he pulls away to gesture between them and to the table, with the discarded pieces of paper and almost empty beer bottles. “This was actually a perfect date.”
“This wasn’t even a date, sweetheart.” Eddie leans in to kiss his lips again. “I know we said we don’t need to date before getting engaged, but now that we are, of course I'll take you out. I’ll wine and dine you, and woo the shit out of you.” he says, and Buck laughs. Eddie wants to listen to that laugh for the rest of his life. And he can. He will. “Dates with you will be the only ones that won’t be awful.”
“First of all, you don’t need to woo me, I’m already yours. And second, prepare for a lifetime of awesome dates with me. It’s gonna be so fun.” he smirks, and then kisses Eddie again. Eddie pulls at his arm, to get him back on the chair, because the angle is making his back hurt. But of course Buck has a better idea, and he climbs into Eddie’s lap, straddling him. Eddie briefly thinks that he hopes his chairs are sturdy enough to support two grown men, but if not, well, who cares? He has the love of his life in his arms, he’s engaged – which is wild, since he was single a mere twenty minutes ago – and he’s making out with his fiance in his kitchen, while their kid sleeps soundly in his room. 
Life couldn’t be better. And the future looks so bright and promising now, like never before. He can’t wait to spend a lifetime with the best friend he’s ever had.
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Tag list (if you want to be added pls interact with this post): @idealuk @thebravebitch @this-is-moony-lovegood @greenfairrryy
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inevitably-johnlocked · 2 years ago
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HI!! I was wondering whether u have any fics with accidental love confessions?
Hey Lovely!
Ahhhhhhhh MAYBE??? There might be some on one of my Love Confession lists:
Love Confessions / Slow Burn / Dev. Rel. (Fluff Version)
... / Love Confessions, Slow Burn & Dev. Rel. Pt. 2 /.../
Love Confessions Pt. 3
Love Confessions Pt. 4
Love Confessions Pt. 5
Christmas-Time Love Confessions
My brain is frozen on if any of them are accidental, lol.
Anyone have any that are FOR SURE accidental confessions??
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mylittleredgirl · 5 months ago
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people call babylon 5 a “space soap opera” and they’re right! of course there are the sweeping dramatic arcs and the rise and fall of dynasties, but it’s also:
lochley being sheridan’s ex-wife for no reason and them keeping it a secret for half a season, also for no reason
that one episode where there’s an alien ceremony where everyone has to reveal a secret and fully three people confess their love
every time they block a conversation like this:
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yourgalgremlin · 5 months ago
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I 🩵 Maxence Danet-Fauvel (the Barty fancast)
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zoroslost · 10 months ago
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Law getting absolutely wasted during a party with the Strawhat crew and ranting to Luffy about how he hates him. How he never follows the plan and always takes the stupidest, most bullheaded action he can convince of. How childish he is and how he makes Law be childish too.
How he hates that Luffy ruined his plans to die for his revenge. How he gave him something to live for. A dream. How dare he give Law something to live for.
Bepo decides that maybe Law is a little too far gone and moves to separate them, concerned that his captain is about to start a war with the Strawhat pirates that they will not be able to win. But when he tries to separate Law from Luffy’s side, Law surprises everyone present by throwing his arms around Luffy’s neck in a tight hug. He continues his rant.
How dare Luffy make him care again and then just expect them to go back to how it was before. To not be around eachother anymore.
And Luffy just puts his straw hat on Law’s head and hugs him back.
The next morning, Law wakes up trapped by a rubber prison as Luffy decided to use him as a pillow. He tries to extract himself (so he can throw himself off the ship and not have to deal with the embarrassment of his actions), but his movements rouse Luffy. Luffy blinks up at him with a wide smile and says, “I love you too Torao!”
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bones-of-a-rabbit · 1 year ago
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do you want to be needed, or do you want to be wanted?
*throws this betrothed au sappiness at you* i hope u enjoy this despite how low effort and smashed together it is pls forgive me srry *scuttles back under my littel moss covered rock*
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miguxadraws · 28 days ago
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Voice box Ragatha makes so much sense that I'm surprised no one's made fanfiction from this yet.
True!! It's such a cute headcanon tbh. Lots of potential for a romcom fanfiction.
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wikiangela · 2 years ago
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stuck with each other
silly domestic fluff, kitchens, accidental love confessions ❤️
Words: 2.5k
[read more on Ao3]
Buck's new fixation is buying unnecessary kitchen gadgets that end up in Eddie's kitchen, they all cook together, and Eddie can't keep his feelings in check.
Eddie’s not sure how or when it starts. All he knows is that suddenly wherever he turns in his own kitchen, he finds plenty of new, weird, very unnecessary – in his opinion – gadgets and appliances, and their amount only continues to grow, and it’s all Buck’s fault.
Buck has been basically in charge of his kitchen for years now, especially before Eddie learned how to cook – he’s still nowhere near Buck’s skills, but recently they’ve been cooking together very often, too. But Eddie doesn’t think it was a thing before, Buck buying all those things and just leaving them at Eddie’s place, he’d notice. It’s a new phase, almost compulsive shopping but only for kitchen gadgets. It must’ve started recently, with the smaller things, but he just can’t pinpoint when or why Buck would even buy all this just to leave it in Eddie’s kitchen, in the beginning not even telling him. And now he’s less sneaky about it.
It always goes like this: Buck walks into the house, carrying bigger or smaller boxes, excitedly shouting: “Guys, I found something so cool!” He always has a bag of groceries with him, too, with things he’d need to demonstrate how whatever new cool gadget he bought works, and make dinner in the process.
Chris always gets super excited – Buck got him to love cooking lately – while Eddie’s just fondly exasperated, because, well, they’re slowly running out of space, and it’s not like all of that is constantly – or ever – used anyway. And he never takes it back to his loft.
Today, he brought some little device that apparently can slice any vegetable or fruit into cubes of whatever size you want, attached to a container. He presents it with various vegetables that he bought to make a salad, and a huge smile, and tells Chris it’s so easy and safe to use he can help Buck cut everything now.
“Whatever happened to a simple knife and board?” Eddie asks with a raised eyebrow, leaning against the counter, and watching his boys get overly excited about this surely overpriced and such an unnecessary gadget. But, well, as long as they have fun, right? Which doesn’t mean he won’t be a little grumpy and won’t tease Buck about it every chance he gets.
“But this is so much more convenient!” Buck exclaims, his eyes shining with excitement, and Eddie fights a smile that wants to force itself onto his face. He’s so adorable, it takes everything in Eddie not to just walk up and kiss him – but he can’t, unless he wants to risk it all, and he’s not quite there yet. “It has all kinds of blades and everything!”
“Is it, though? Are we even gonna ever use it?” 
“Dad.” Christopher rolls his eyes. “Of course we will.”
“Really? I don’t think I used, I don’t know-” he tries to think of what they even have, and remembers the latest thing he never even used once. “The apple slicer. Or the avocado thing. I have a knife, that’s enough.” he says pointedly, and Buck just grins.
“You use the egg thing.” Christopher comments with a smug smile.
“Okay, that’s one.” Eddie laughs. Well, it’s a convenient thing to separate the yolk and whites – with his clumsiness in the kitchen, it’s the only way he doesn’t mess this up without eggshells falling in or yolk breaking. “But, for example, the salad spinner just takes up space in the cupboard.” At least that’s better than the pressure cooker that’s being moved around on the counter, because there’s quite literally no space for it anywhere, and Buck didn’t take it to his loft even after Eddie suggested it. He’s not sure how to take that, to be honest, because, well, Buck buys all of it, with his own money, and even he barely uses it once he gets bored – and yet he always leaves it all here. Eddie can’t even count how many peelers he has in a drawer, because apparently Buck always finds better ones, as if they all didn’t work exactly the same.
“Your dad just likes to make everything harder for himself.” Buck says to Chris, and Eddie scoffs and shakes his head. “Here, you wanna try?” he gives the thing to Chris, and Eddie’s immediately on full alert, ready to jump in at any moment. He knows his kid is growing up, and can do all the stuff, but he’ll never not worry. Buck whispers, “Watch your fingers,” and earns an annoyed look. Chris puts a piece of a cucumber on the blades and closes the lid, and it falls into the container in little cubes. “See?” Buck looks back at Eddie with a smug smile. “So quick and easy.”
“I think I’ll stick with a knife, thanks.” Eddie chuckles. He doesn’t mind it all, really. He’ll indulge any of Buck’s fixations, if it means he can watch him and Chris just have fun together.
“Does that mean I shouldn’t take out the scissors then?” Buck asks with a shit-eating grin. Eddie sighs heavily.
“What scissors?” 
“It was the same brand and it was right next to each other on the shelf…” he says, as he takes the half-empty grocery bag he brought and pulls out a small box. “They’re herb scissors, and-”
“Buck, seriously?” Eddie can’t help a laugh. “This is so unnecessary. Where do you even find this stuff?”
“It’s not like I seek them out, I just saw those on a shelf at a supermarket.” he shrugs, blushing a little. “I admit, I might go a little overboard sometimes…” he ducks his head, his smile sheepish. “But this one can be useful! And we can get rid of some of the stuff.” he concedes at Eddie’s unwavering look. 
“To make room for more.” Christopher adds, and Buck laughs.
“Well, I just saw a video of this really cool device-” Buck starts and goes on to tell them all about this new thing he wants to buy, getting Chris all excited, and Eddie exasperated, because he knows he won’t even try to really persuade Buck not to buy it, and not to leave it here, because it’s Buck new fixation and it makes him happy, and Eddie would do anything to make him happy. 
Eddie just stands there, watching his boys keep slicing the vegetables and making a salad – Buck uses the salad spinner this time – while Buck still talks about a variety of ridiculous gadgets that are supposed to make cooking easier, but sound like a waste of money – and Eddie knows would pay for it out of his own pocket if Buck let him, just to see that smile. Just to keep seeing Buck with Chris like this, getting him involved, teaching him to cook, just like Bobby taught him, and even thinking about this comparison makes Eddie feel things he’s not sure he’s prepared for.
Eddie’s about to say that while they’re doing that, he’ll start on preparing their actual dinner. He wants to say that, or interject their conversation with all the teasing quips that gather at the tip of his tongue, joke about it some more, tell Buck he’s being ridiculous, anything like that – but when he opens his mouth what comes out is:
“I’m so in love with you.” in the most fond and tender tone he’s ever heard himself speak.
“What?”
Clearly, it takes them both by surprise, Eddie feels his eyes open so widely they might as well pop out of his head, and his heart is hammering so loudly, he almost can’t hear anything else. Buck drops whatever vegetable he was holding, and it hits the table and rolls onto the floor, as his eyes widen as well, his lips part in surprise.
“Uh.” is all Eddie can say, while he processes what even happened. He did not mean to say it like that, not now, not with his kid present. Speaking of, when Eddie looks at Chris, he finds the biggest smile on his face.
“So… I’ll go to my room.” he says happily, getting up from the table. “Tell me when you’re done so I can help with dinner.” he adds, and as he walks out, the kitchen is silent. Buck and Eddie look at each other and never break eye contact. Eddie’s not even sure he blinks, that's how surprised he still is.
“Uh, what- what did you just say?” Buck finally breaks the silence, and Eddie can’t decipher his expression. He’s clearly shocked, but there’s something else there, something he can’t name, or maybe can’t hope.
Eddie’s not panicking. Yes, his heart beats rapidly, and his fingers start tingling, he’s dizzy, and his breaths get a little shallow, but he’s not panicking, he’s fine. It's no big deal, it’s just Buck, whom he just accidentally told he’s in love with. He’s not freaking out at all. It’s just Buck, his best friend, and no matter what, this is never going to change. And there’s a chance, a very small chance, but it’s there, that maybe, just maybe, he might feel the same way. And if he doesn’t, well, they’ll survive. And it’s not like he can just back away now, he’s already said it. The only option is to double down and hope for the best.
“I- I said-” he takes a deep breath. Now or never. He swallows hard, his mouth suddenly very dry, and takes another deep breath. “I said I’m in love with you.”
“Oh.” Buck tilts his head, but that’s all the response Eddie gets, and maybe he is a little panicked. He just needs to know where they stand now. He cannot lose Buck.
“Aren’t you gonna say anything? It’s unusual for you to be this quiet.” Eddie tries to joke, tries to chuckle, but he can barely breathe, his head spinning.
“Sorry, I’m just-” Buck shakes his head, and Eddie thinks that a shy smile is spreading on his face. “I just wasn’t expecting this, and I’m processing.”
“Can you process before I have a panic attack? I’m kinda freaking out over here.” he admits, his voice unusually high, as he takes another calming breath, which does not help at all. 
“Oh, Eddie. No, don’t- don’t worry, I-” he frowns, concerned, as he moves around the table to stand in front of Eddie. “I’m sorry, this is just very unexpected.” he chuckles, then tentatively puts both of his hands on the sides of Eddie’s neck, thumbs grazing his cheeks gently, and, yeah, Eddie’s heart is cartwheeling all around his chest. “This is not how I expected this to go. I- Eddie, I’m in love with you, too. I love you. So much.” his voice breaks a little, his eyes are shining with tears – happy tears – and so much love, and suddenly Eddie can’t breathe for a whole other reason, just overwhelmed by the emotion in Buck’s eyes. He must’ve been hiding it well, because there’s no way Eddie’s never noticed this look before.
“Buck.” Eddie’s hands settle on Buck’s wrists, where they’re close to his own face, holding on firmly, never wanting to let go. “If we’re really doing this, I need you to know that I’m one thousand percent in, no looking back.” he says, voice steady and decisive, despite still kind of shaking from the nerves and excitement.
“I want that more than anything.” Buck confesses, voice barely a whisper, a huge smile on his face, that Eddie’s sure he’s mirroring. “If you’ll have me.”
“Buck.” Eddie rolls his eyes fondly, and a laugh escapes him. “I think I made it clear that I will have you. And I’m never letting you go. You’re stuck with us, with me, forever.” he adds firmly, not able to contain a huge smile.
“I guess you’re stuck with me, too, then.” Buck says softly, his eyes flickering to Eddie’s lips, and back to his eyes. “You think you can handle that? I’m kind of a mess.” he laughs, but there’s some heaviness to his tone, and Eddie gets it, better than anyone ever would. 
“And I’m not?” Eddie raises an eyebrow. “I want all of you, Buck, the mess included. We’re a team, aren’t we? We can handle our messes together.” he smiles, still feeling so nervous, his heart about to hammer through his chest, the atmosphere feels so heavy, because, well, they’re crossing a line they’ve been toeing for a long time now, and it’s scary – but also so exhilarating.
“Okay.” Buck whispers, his gaze dropping to Eddie’s lips again. “Can I kiss you now? I’ve been wanting to do that for years, and I don’t think I can wait longer.” he chuckles breathlessly, and Eddie leans in. 
Buck meets him in the middle, and when their lips meet, all of Eddie’s nerves and panic melt away, replaced with a sense of calm, of being settled, grounded, finally where he’s supposed to be. Buck kisses him so softly and tenderly, holding him so carefully but firmly, Eddie just melts against him, his arms finding their place around Buck’s neck, bringing him closer, as close as possible. It’s unhurried, gentle, exploratory, just savoring this moment. It’s everything, too much and not enough, and Eddie wants more, he wants Buck to kiss him like this for the rest of his life, and he can’t wait to find out what other kinds of kisses from him will feel like. 
Buck pulls away way too quickly, and Eddie chases after him, and Buck chuckles, and it sounds even sweeter than it normally does.
“We still need to cook dinner, Eddie.” he reminds, and oh, right, Eddie comes back to reality and remembers they were preparing a meal, and Buck was showing off the new gadget he bought, when Eddie’s brain malfunctioned, overwhelmed with the love and fondness he has for Buck, and made him say the words that just changed his life. This is just ridiculous. Which is why he can’t help but burst out laughing. “What’s funny?” Buck asks, frowning a bit, but still with a bright smile.
“I can’t believe this is why I told you I love you.” Eddie shakes his head, pointing to the counter, where the abandoned vegetable cutter sits among the mess of ingredients.
“See?” Buck’s smile turns smug. “And you complained about me buying too much of this stuff.” he laughs, then leans in to leave one more chaste kiss on Eddie’s lips. “I’ll be right back, I’ll go get Chris.”
Soon, it’s the three of them in the kitchen again, just like it’s supposed to be, preparing a family dinner together. Buck and Eddie can’t stop smiling and exchanging glances, while Christopher pretends to be annoyed and teases them about being gross and in love, but he can’t hide a happy grin, either.
Eddie’s still not sure why Buck’s wasting money on all that useless kitchen stuff, but he thinks he does know why they’re all in his kitchen – because it’s their kitchen in their house, where they belong together, as a family. Now he only needs to make it official. 
He looks at his kid and his partner, in every sense of the word now, as they talk and laugh, and cook together, and his heart is so full. This is all he’ll ever need.
____
Tag list (if you want to be added pls interact with this post): @idealuk @thebravebitch @this-is-moony-lovegood @greenfairrryy
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todorokis-girl · 5 months ago
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It's never too late for this - Tendo Satori x f!reader
Amidst the laughter and memories of a high school reunion, Y/N finds herself swept up in a whirlwind of emotions. A few glasses of wine blur the lines between friendship and unspoken desires, leading to an accidental confession to her long-time crush, Tendo Satori. Will this unexpected revelation bring them closer together or tear them apart? Follow their journey of love, friendship, and vulnerability in the charming backdrop of a French chocolatier's dreams
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The air was thick with nostalgia and the scent of blooming flowers as Y/N walked into the restaurant. It had been two years since she'd last seen Tendo Satori, and she could feel her heart pounding in her chest. She had spent those years supporting him from afar, as he followed his dreams of becoming a chocolatier in France. Now, as she walked into the reunion of their high school volleyball team, she felt a mixture of excitement and dread.
Y/N had always gone above and beyond for Satori when she was the team manager. She was there for every practice, every game, every celebration, and every heartbreak. She had supported his dreams after graduation, encouraging him to chase his passion. But she never told him how she truly felt, believing it was better to let him go without the burden of her unspoken feelings.
As she stepped inside, she saw him. Satori was surrounded by their former teammates, his distinctive red hair and infectious smile making him easy to spot. He looked different yet the same, more mature but with the same twinkle in his eyes. Y/N felt a pang of longing as she watched him laugh and joke with the others.
"Y/N!" A familiar voice broke through her reverie. It was Ushijima Wakatoshi, his deep voice as commanding as ever. "It's good to see you."
"You too, Ushijima," she replied with a smile. She greeted the rest of the team, exchanging hugs and catching up on their lives. But her eyes kept drifting back to Satori.
Finally, their eyes met. Tendo's face lit up with recognition, and he made his way over to her. "Y/N! It's been too long!"
"Hi, Ten," she said, trying to keep her voice steady. "It really has."
They fell into an easy conversation, reminiscing about their high school days and sharing stories of their lives since then. Y/N felt a warmth in her chest, the same feeling she always had when she was with him. But there was also a sadness, knowing that she had never told him how she felt.
As the night wore on, the drinks flowed freely. Y/N found herself laughing more, feeling more relaxed than she had in a long time. The alcohol blurred the edges of her anxiety, and she let herself enjoy the moment.
At one point, she found herself sitting next to Tendo, a glass of wine in her hand. They were chatting about his life in France, the challenges and joys of being a chocolatier. Y/N listened intently, hanging on to his every word.
"I can't believe you did it," she said, her voice a little louder and looser than usual. "You really followed your dream."
Tendo smiled, his eyes twinkling. "It hasn't been easy, but it's been worth it. And I had a lot of support from friends like you."
Y/N's heart fluttered at his words. She took another sip of wine, feeling a warm flush spread through her. "I've always believed in you, Ten. Ever since high school."
He looked at her, his expression softening. "You were always there for me, Y/N. I don't think I ever thanked you properly for that."
She waved her hand dismissively, her movements exaggerated by the alcohol. "You don't have to thank me. I did it because I love you."
The words slipped out before she could stop them. She froze, realizing what she had just said. Tendo stared at her, his eyes wide with surprise.
"What did you say?" he asked, his voice quiet.
Y/N felt a surge of panic. She tried to backtrack, her cheeks burning. "I… I mean, I cared about you a lot," she stammered, avoiding his gaze. "You were important to me."
Satori's eyes never left her face. "Y/N, did you mean it? Do you love me?"
She looked down at her hands, her heart pounding in her chest. "I…" She hesitated, biting her lip. The alcohol had loosened her tongue, but now she felt exposed and vulnerable. "I didn't mean for it to come out like that. I was afraid to tell you because I didn't want to hold you back. You've always been so incredible, Satori, and I didn't want my feelings to be a burden."
There was a long silence. Y/N felt tears prickling at the corners of her eyes, afraid of what he might say next. She had imagined this moment so many times, but now that it was happening, she felt completely unprepared.
Tendo gently took her hand, his touch warm and reassuring. "Y/N," he said softly, "I had no idea. I wish you had told me sooner."
She looked up at him, tears now streaming down her cheeks. "I was so scared," she whispered. "Scared that you wouldn't feel the same, that it would ruin everything between us."
He pulled her into a hug, holding her tightly. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I never wanted you to feel like that. But I'm here now, and I want to be here for you."
She clung to him, feeling the warmth of his embrace. "What does this mean, Tendo? For us?"
He pulled back slightly, looking into her eyes. "It means we have a lot to talk about. But for now, just know that I care about you deeply. We’ll figure it out together."
As they stood there, wrapped in each other's arms, Y/N felt a sense of relief and hope. The road ahead was uncertain, but for the first time in two years, she felt a glimmer of happiness. She had finally told Satori the truth, even if it was by accident, and no matter what happened next, she knew she had taken the first step towards healing her heart.
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verfound · 2 months ago
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FIC: "Shut Up. I Love You."
(MLB; Lukanette; LBSC Lukanette Month 2024)
@lovebugs-and-snakecharmers is doing a Lukanette Month for September 2024, and we all just kinda tossed some prompts in the disco to compile a list?  We ended up with 71 prompts, so I decided I’d roll some dice to pick a prompt, do a twenty minute (ish, bc we all know sometimes they run away from me) sprint, and try to get some short fics out this month?
Read on Ao3
Prompt 10: A: says something stupid; B: laughing “Shut up.  I love you.”
Friday nights on the Liberty were becoming something of a habit for Marinette.  It was too easy to follow Juleka, Rose, and Luka home from school for band practice.  Even if there was still some time before Ivan was expected to be there, Marinette didn’t mind.  They usually spent the time either above or below deck, depending on the weather, working on homework or hanging out.  She’d lost count of the afternoons she’d spent on a crate beside Luka, sketching her latest creation as he noodled on his guitar.
It wasn’t uncommon that she lingered after practice anymore, either.  Sometimes Luka would have to work, but she was still welcome – she was always welcome, he loved to remind her – and the creative space there was just…freeing.  Usually Juleka and Rose were still there to keep her company, but sometimes they would wander off on a date.  Usually they were all left hanging around, and those usually led to movie or game nights.
Marinette loved it.
The Liberty was, more than ever, starting to feel like a second home.
So there was nothing really unusual about that particular night, with all four of them sprawled out on the couches below deck watching some movie or documentary on…something.  Marinette wasn’t quite sure, honestly.  She was curled up against Luka’s side, her head on his shoulder and a blanket stretched over them.  She had been sketching, when the movie – the first movie? – had started, but Luka had taken her book from her when she’d first started nodding off before it could hit the floor.  Now she was…floating.  Drifting in and out of consciousness, half awake and barely aware of anything beyond the warm arm holding her against an even warmer chest.
…it felt like what all those failed dates should have felt like.  Back when.
She was dimly aware of quiet chatter on the other end of the couch.  She wasn’t at all aware of the knowing smirks and giggles Rose and Juleka kept shooting their way.  She was kind of aware of the documentary, where some comment had caused Luka to snort, the sound startling her just enough to become aware of the derisive chuckle that followed.  She shifted slightly, and his arm tightened around her.
The chuckle was a warm rumble beneath her ear, and she found herself sighing as she sank into it.  Into him.
“Because that’s what everyone wants,” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm and making her brow furrow in confusion.  “Xavier-Yves Roth for Mayor – Paris is doomed.”
She snorted, choking a little on a laugh.  She turned her head into his chest, smiling.
“Shut up,” she mumbled, still laughing.  He was so dumb.  “I love you.”
Now, Marinette was…not all there.  Half asleep at best.  More than half asleep, really.  Which is probably why she didn’t notice the way Luka just…froze beneath her.  And she probably wouldn’t have noticed it, if Rose hadn’t let out an ear-piercing squeal that could rival a tea kettle the next moment.  She jerked away from Luka, flailing and sending their blanket to the floor (and probably smacking him in the face – oops) – and then sending herself to the floor as she slid off the couch in the commotion.  She smacked her knees into the edge of the crate they used as a coffee table, and then Juleka was sliding off the couch as she laughed and laughed and laughed, clutching her stomach.  Marinette looked up, blinking wide, confused eyes at Luka, but Luka was…just sitting there.
Staring at her.
“What…what?” she asked, blinking owlishly at him.  But then he shook his head, and he was smiling, and oh that was…that was an awesome smile…
“Are you ok?” he asked, reaching out to help her up.  She nodded mutely, and she bent to retrieve their blanket before returning to her place against him.  “You sure?”
“I think I dozed off,” she said, rubbing at her eyes.  She smiled sheepishly at him.  “Sorry.  I didn’t mean…did I miss anything good?”
“Oh, nothing too important,” Juleka cackled, and for the strangest reason the look she was giving Marinette made heat crawl up her neck.  Luka shot her a look, but then his arms were wrapping around Marinette again and tugging her back against him.  He tucked his face against the crook of her neck, and she sucked in a breath when he pressed a little kiss there.
“Ignore her.  She’s a monster,” he said.  His breath was burning against her skin, but not as much as his lips when he kissed her again.  “I love you, too.”
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natelia-aldelliz · 2 years ago
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"What if I fade?"
Soap lifts his head from his journal, looking up at Roach who is eerily floating near the ceiling. The slow movements almost make him look like he's in water. Kind of ironic given the way he died.
"What do you mean?" he asks, confused.
"What if I move on, what if I disappear," Roach elaborates, refusing to meet his eye. "Not everyone is a ghost, right? We'd be overly crowded. The fact that we're not also means that not every ghost stays."
Soap forces his dry throat to swallow. He honestly didn't want to think about that. He still needs Roach, he probably always will, but he hasn't even told him that he - he takes a deep breath in to calm himself.
"I don't know how it works," he admits quietly, bouncing his leg absent-mindedly. "You're probably right, like most of the time. Even if I really want you to be wrong about that."
Roach finally looks towards him.
"Maybe I should move on," Roach whispers. "It's not healthy, Johnny. You have no idea the things I want, what I wish for, that I'll never get."
Soap doesn't stand up, just keeps staring into Roach's eyes.
"I think I might have an idea, actually," he whispers back. Roach flounders for a moment. Soap really wishes he didn't get that wrong. He's pretty sure Roach meant that he can't have Ghost, and he himself can't have Roach. So... It's pretty similar.
"I've been feeling less like myself recently," Roach insists, deciding to ignore that comment for now. "I find myself wishing one of you would die so I wouldn't be alone. I never thought like that before, I fear that I may have stayed too long, that I'm starting to lose myself."
And he looks scared. It's written on his features so clearly and it breaks Soap's heart.
"You're not alone," he swears. "I'm here with you, and I'll make sure you stay you, however I can."
Roach looks at him, examining his face, looking for... something. Whatever it is, he seems to have found it because he exhales through his nose like a very soft laugh and averts his eyes, almost... blushing? It's a bit hard to tell from the distance and his left cheek being covered in burns while his right is covered in freckles, but he's pretty sure his ears are red.
"You can't look at me like that, Johnny," he says almost coyly. "I can't do anything about it, it's not fair."
Soap's face is burning and his eyes are wide. Was he too obvious? Did Roach understand or is he joking?
They probably look stupid, both of them redder than a fire truck, avoiding the other's eyes, regretting their words. Or at least he supposes that it's what's happening, because he's sure not looking up.
"If it makes you feel better," Roach finally says, sounding like he's smiling, "you were right for once : I am right most of the time. Judging by your reaction, you did indeed have no idea what I want."
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jameshurleyhateblog · 6 months ago
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I'm sorry Ghoul, but you ain't him...
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This. This. This entire conversation with Morrigan actually makes me want to sob. She and my Tabris always becomes close friends over the course of DAO; that, paired with the fact that my Tabris always romances Alistair, makes everything about this hurt so much more when you take DAO's ending into account.
Her confusion over why my Tabris didn't send her away. Why she didn't abandon her after they learned of Flemeth's plans. Why Tabris went out of her way to slay Flemeth and bring her the true grimoire. She asks Tabris why, and is baffled when the answer is, "I did it because I'm your friend," as if it's that simple.
The way Morrigan looks at the warden, the way her voice cracks when she says, "I want you to know that while I may not always prove... worthy... of your friendship, I will always value it."
She knows how this will end; Flemeth sent her with the wardens with the end goal of stopping the blight and obtaining the old god soul through the dark ritual. Morrigan knows that Alistair and Tabris are the only Grey Wardens here, and assuming they don't find more, one of them will have to die defeating the archdemon unless they agree to do the dark ritual.
With that context, her asking Alistair, "And what if a Grey Warden has forced to choose between the Warden he loved and ending the Blight? What should his choice be?" suddenly has so much subtext weaved through the words that I'm gonna start foaming at the mouth. She's practically telling Alistair that a warden has to die. She's scrutinizing his reaction to find any hint that suggests he would agree to the dark ritual in order to save himself and the woman he loves. And when he doesn't choose, she has her answer.
Morrigan made comments to Tabris about him, almost hopeful that their relationship was just a physical thing between them and not actually riddled with feelings... and then gives disapproval when Tabris says she loves him.
She doesn't want the warden to die; hell, she doesn't want Alistair to die, either; whether because she does actually care about him or because she knows it'll break her friend's heart if she loses him, or both!
Things would be so much easier if the only two Grey Wardens left to defeat the blight didn't fall in love, wouldn't they, Morrigan?
She knows that in the end, no matter the outcome, she will lose the woman she called sister and it's devastating.
Morrigan, who has never known true friendship. Who grew up isolated in the woods with an abusive mother and terrible implications for her future. Who discovered said mother planned to take over her body just as she did with her other daughters. Who doesn't understand kindness as it was rarely given to her without a catch. Who isolates herself from the others in camp. Who finally has a companion she cares about... and in the end, if her plan works and the dark ritual is completed, she'll end up pregnant and alone and wearing Tabris' resentment like a tender wound on her heart.
Or Tabris will reject the ritual, and will die to the archdemon.
Or her lover will.
I just- the dynamic between the warden, romanced Alistair, and Morrigan is so good and painful and rich that I'm gnawing on furniture as we speak.
#dragon age origins#dao#alistair theirin#dao alistair#dao morrigan#dao tabris#warden tabris#i'm replaying dao right now in case my recent written posts haven't made that obvious#the relationship dynamics the warden has with each of the companions is so so soooo good like there isn't a companion i dislike#i play into the slow burn with alistair's romance but it's not even just the romance aspect it's also their friendship too#playing dao and not romancing alistair would feel wrong at this point for me it's so crucial to the entire story and its development#and i love morrigan's friendship with the warden and how gutted tabris is when she comes clean about everything and offers the ritual#and then bails once everything is over and tabris is torn between hating her and feeling hurt and not wanting morrigan to be alone again#i talked more in depth about morrigan and the ritual in a previous post but it's a lot... especially when it comes to the witch hunt dlc#oh and then there's the friendship between tabris and zevran like don't even get me started on that sksksks i won't be able to stop#even a character like oghren who is the last person you'd think tabris would ever become friends with since he's y'know *oghren*#but i'll go on the record and say there's more to oghren that gets overlooked and overshadowed by his glaring flaws#and i don't wanna talk about leliana... she makes me too sad like ever since my last playthrough where i accidentally triggered her romance#while i was deep in alistair's romance i have a really hard time not reading into the things she says to tabris#in my last playthrough i dunno what i did but she confessed to tabris even though she was fully aware that tabris and alistair were togethe#and it was a *mess* okay like it really felt like we killed marjolaine and leliana was in a vulnerable position yet was hardened enough#to be like 'i know she and alistair are together but i'll take my shot anyway and attempt to break them up' like.... noooooo leliana D:#and the rest of the game it felt like she was bitter and still in love with tabris and i felt *horrible*#i just said i don't wanna talk about it but hhhnnngggg i'm taking extra precautions to not have a repeat of that this time#excuse my tag ramblings i'm just very passionate about dao and the companions okay#also want to note that this is my interpretation of morrigan's motivations based on how i play the game and my warden#so others might view this reaction and the warden/romanced alistair/morrigan dynamic differently and in that case#i would be interested to hear that different interpretations because those are always fun to read
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unknown-user-offical · 1 year ago
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He didn't mean to fall in love with Aizawa, it was just an accident~
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chronicowboy · 1 year ago
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i've decided that upon christopher finding out that sometimes a male swan will mate with a female and raise the egg with another male swan he starts using a bunch of swan analogies around the house that fly right over eddie's head, but he loves his kid so he nods along, but buck always gets a little weird whenever it happens until one day chris sends them both a picture of two male swans in the park with their babies and captions it "you and buck" and buck has to stammer out an explanation to eddie about gay paternal swans
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i-did-not-mean-to · 5 months ago
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YOTP - June
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It's around @russingon-week after all, I think...
Have some Russingon for your nerves :)
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Now with art by @chechula!!! Go give them a follow!
Pairing: Maedhros x Fingon
Prompts: Wedding/Proposal, Saving the world, (accidental) love confession, “You aren’t what I expected”, Downpour, Soulmate AU
Words: 2 510
Warnings: Injury, prophetic dreams, gender confusion, soulmate AU, blood and rain
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Nelyafinwë flexed his right hand absent-mindedly—he’d had another highly confusing dream in which a hand that seemed to be his own was pointing wildly at a blurry landscape in the distance.
Even now, hours after waking, he could not shake the gnawing sensation that he knew the outline of the faraway city, nestled at the foot of a mighty mountain, but, no matter how fiercely he frowned, the liberating recognition escaped him stubbornly.
“There you are,” his father exclaimed impatiently upon finding him ambulating under a quiet colonnade. “Your tutor is awaiting you!”
Nelyafinwë looked up, tempted momentarily to ask Fëanáro about the city in his dreams, but he didn’t dare.
Ever since his childhood, his family had owned and inhabited this vast estate. Nelyafinwë had, nevertheless, always been aware that they’d removed themselves from an entirely different, unknown society for reasons his parents adamantly refused to discuss.
He couldn’t shake the sensation that this imposed exile was somehow linked to him, and so he’d done his best to honour his family’s sacrifice by fulfilling his father’s every ambitious project and exaggerated expectation.
He was, Nelyafinwë thought as he ducked into the library, after all the oldest son, and he owed it to his brothers to be the best role model he could possibly be.
With the fanfare of hasty steps and rustling paper started this most fateful of days, looking much like countless ones before, which would end in the inevitable victory of fate over willpower.
In the afternoon, as he took another wistful stroll, Nelyafinwë passed by his father’s study and was struck by the high-pitched trill in his mother’s anxious voice.
His steps faltered for it was not in Nerdanel’s stolid nature to sound so distressed and breathless, not even in the presence of her formidable husband.
“He’s almost reached the age—” she whispered urgently. “Soon…”
“I care nought about the fate of the world,” Fëanáro thundered. “We’ve gone away so far that none even remember him—surely, whatever destiny that hooded, skeletal soothsayer has foretold for my son, shall not come to pass.”
“You have seven sons,” Nerdanel bellowed. “And if the Kingdom, your Kingdom, falls—what is to become of them? I’m afeared, ‘Náro. Can we truly outrun fate once it has been spoken into the world?”
Nelyafinwë did not hear what answer, if any, his esteemed father made to that passionate exclamation, for he was already racing headlong across the atrium towards the gate, desperate to escape the familial country home and lose himself amongst the old groves surrounding their estate.
All his darkest, most torturous suspicions had been confirmed, and he tended to agree with his mother—nobody, not even his father, could circumvent destiny.
The olive trees loomed dark and fertile on a nearby hill, and he plunged into the blessed shadow as fast as his long, toned legs would carry him.
Nobody should witness him as he came to terms with the terrible doom hanging over his helpless head—even a wretched fool had his pride.
Soon, though, he resented himself for his irrational, puerile reaction. He hadn’t even ascertained the nature of the prophecy that had so distressed his parents, and he knew only too well that being aware of the impending danger was ever preferable if one sought to ward it off.
Nevertheless, he was certain that nothing less than unbearable, unacceptable misery could have made his proud father leave his hitherto unmentioned family to hide away in the countryside.
His head was spinning with the devastating answers to old questions and new contradictions; surely, Fëanáro could not be part of the Royal House, could he?
This absurd revelation conjured up a new avalanche of guilt and despair in the young man; if his mother had spoken true, his father would have deserted his duty and deprived the whole family of a luxurious life for the sake of his oldest son alone.
At once, Nelyafinwë understood the deeper meaning of Nerdanel’s harsh words, and his eyes filled with tears of self-loathing and impuissant rage.
“Cry not, little princeling.”
Nelyafinwë looked up sharply upon hearing the ingratiating tone and the mellow voice coming from deep within the shade of the ancient trees.
“Who goes there?” he called, getting back to his feet to meet any intruder or foe head-on.
“I mean you no harm,” the voice resounded once more, followed by the discreet rustling of leaves and crunching of dry earth underfoot.
A moment later, a tall, beautiful stranger appeared, his mouth curled into a friendly smile—Nelyafinwë shivered in vague prescience.
He couldn’t pinpoint the exact matter of contention, but something about that man struck him as odd and eerily uncanny.
“Did you have a falling out with your parents?”
Slowly backing away, Nelyafinwë stared at the long-fingered, broad hand extended towards him as one hypnotised by a snake about to strike.
“You cannot outrun them—you cannot outrun me!” Springing forth suddenly, the stranger grabbed the prince’s shoulders and shook him lightly.
Darkness—asphyxiating and absolute—descended upon Nelyafinwë’s senses, and he fell, insensate, into the waiting embrace of his terrifyingly charming captor.
Visions of his severed hand—pointing now to the sky, now to the dark abyss below his dangling feet—haunted his restless unconsciousness, and he struggled through bone-breaking agony back to the cold, glassy surface of the waking world.
As soon as he opened his eyes, Nelyafinwë understood that, as per usual, his mother had been right—there had never been the slightest chance of escaping his fate.
Thus, he was much less horrified than he should have been when he realised that he was chained to the sheer flank of a small mountain by his treacherous hand.
Somewhere overhead, he thought he could hear someone laughing wildly—Nelyafinwë was far too tired and proud to rile against predestination.
He hung his head and waited.
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Findekáno awoke bright and early.
“The time has nearly come,” his mother said mournfully as she slowly poured fresh water from an earthen carafe into his goblet.
“I shall be ready!” he assured her confidently. His bright eyes were drawn to a ridge of faraway hills which separated the city from the remote wilds of the countryside. “I feel the need to travel, alone, to gather my spirits and strengthen my flesh.”
Anairë’s gaze grew soft, and she bent over her beloved firstborn to breathe a devoted kiss onto the crown of braided hair tenderly. “So it shall be then,” she whispered, smiling wistfully.
When she’d been heavy with child, a soothsayer had been brought to her, foretelling great feats of valour and puissance for her yet unborn child, and Anairë had never deemed it necessary to subsequently hide that momentous prophecy from her joyous, optimistic son.
“He shall save the kingdom by his fortitude, and true love shall be granted to him as a boon.”
Even now, as she took a sip of her honeyed wine, she could hear the scratchy, unfathomable voice of the hooded stranger echoing through her weary mind.
Often, she had wondered whether she should have spared Findekáno the terrible knowledge of a vague trial awaiting him, especially upon seeing how single-mindedly and grimly he trained to be prepared for every gruesome eventuality.
“It’s almost time—I can sense it. My dreams have been increasingly troubling as of late,” he confessed under his breath.
“The red-haired maiden with the silver eyes again?” Anairë asked understandingly, yearning to lay her cool hand on the feverish brow of her child as she’d once done through seemingly endless nights of debilitating fear. He’d since grown so strong that she doubted he’d ever need her support and comfort again—the thought pained her, but her gentle smile never wavered.
“I cannot see her clearly,” Findekáno mumbled. “She’s always somewhere very high up, blurred by clouds and mist, and yet I know her.”
He stood abruptly. “Please tell father that I wish him well and kiss my siblings in my stead. I shall return soon. I must go at once!”
“May you be victorious, my darling son,” Anairë sighed as she watched him go. Since the day he’d left the protection of her body, she’d not felt so scared on his behalf, so she lifted her head and squared her shoulders resolutely.
She would not quail in the face of destiny—she’d prepare for her son’s triumphant return.
Findekáno set out without delay, a light pack slung across his back, and made for the distant horizon resolutely.
His mind was still entranced with the blurry vision of a person he’d never met and yet had known all his life—he could not recall when the long-limbed, red-haired stranger had first slipped into his most intimate and intense dreams, but he could not consciously remember her ever not having been part of his hopes and fears either.
Maybe, she’d always been there. Maybe, she was a part of himself. Either way, he was determined to find her, and—if possible—fulfil his mother’s tender hopes by courting her.
By the time he re-emerged from his distracted musings about things that belonged to the realm of potential and phantasms instead of careful planning and saving wisdom, Findekáno had left the city far behind him and was clambering over rocks and down virgin gorges.
Still, his heart did not despond, and so he pressed on indefatigably until he reached a bare, forbidding cliff, its jagged outcrops drawing menacing shadows onto the mossy forest floor.
As he turned his gaze upwards in search of he knew not what, Findekáno saw dark clouds gather ominously, and—a mere moment later—heavy rain started falling like passionate, angry tears from the marred sky.
Through the sudden downpour, he could make out a flash of red, glimmering like a defiant torch behind the curtain of shivering grey.
Momentarily, he considered his trusty bow, but he could not trust his aim in the present meteorological conditions, and he didn’t know how feeble his fated lover would be from her ordeal.
“You always knew that it wouldn’t be that easy,” he chided himself, casting off his pack and weapons and clawing his bare fingers into the slippery face of the wet rock.
The ascent was as perilous as it was arduous, but long years of devoted preparation and stubborn training had made Findekáno far stronger and more resilient than any random, benighted wanderer who might have chanced upon so strange and shocking a sight.
At last, he reached a narrow ledge on which he could stand and rest.
Tilting his face upward, he let his eyes travel along dirty, bare feet and long, shapely calves in captivated speechlessness.
This wretched captive, he knew instinctively, was the person of whom he’d been dreaming his whole life…only, those alluring calves melted into bony knees and seemingly endless thighs.
Impatient by nature, he let his gaze move across narrow hips and a taut, pale stomach hastily until it came to rest, astonished and aghast, on a well-defined but unmistakably flat chest.
Findekáno’s stomach somersaulted and his bleeding, aching fingers went numb; he’d found the love of his life, the person who’d right all the countless wrongs of their realm, the very embodiment of his own elusive fate at long last.
His impervious, bold heart stuttered in his heaving chest. Who was he to question fate? Destiny made no mistakes, and he’d risked too much and come too far to turn back now without at least trying to meet this last exquisite challenge head-on.
“You’re not what I expected,” he blurted out.
“I’m ever so sorry if my impersonation of a deviously beguiled and betrayed abductee is not to your liking,” the other rasped, grey eyes flashing in tandem with the churning sky behind him.
“No, I am sorry,” Findekáno replied courteously. “I…surmised that you’d be a woman, but no matter. I’ve been waiting, hoping, wishing for you. My name is Findekáno.”
“I’d shake your hand, but…” the literal hanger-on smiled sharply. “My name is Nelyafinwë. I’ve learned…was it today? Yesterday? A month ago? I know not…that I was a prince. Before I could fulfil my glorious purpose, though, I found myself…between a rock and a hard place, if you will forgive my grim sense of humour.”
Findekáno nodded feelingly; he’d not brought any crafting tools, and even if he was to climb down again to fetch his bow and his dwindling food supplies, he wasn’t confident that he’d then be better equipped to free what was, in all likelihood, his soulmate.
Already, he felt the eerie but irresistible pull of a power far beyond his understanding or control ensnare every fibre of his being.
Instinctively, he understood that the time of struggle and fight was at an end—he wholeheartedly yielded to the warm chains of a nascent bond taking hold of him and rooting him to the bare rock underfoot.
“Have you come to a conclusion?” he then asked cautiously, ready and willing to follow his fated lover’s wishes and commands.
“The hand has to go,” Nelyafinwë replied dryly. “Unfortunately, I seem to be unable to pull myself up for long enough to gnaw it off.”
Horrified, Findekáno patted his belt. “I have a knife if that is of any use to you?”
Like all people who spent their lives waiting for one very specific event to happen, he was thoroughly overwhelmed and discombobulated by the sheer speed and chaotic violence with which that monumental incident tore through his existence like an avalanche.
Unafraid even in the face of certain devastation, Findekáno straightened in a touching imitation of his mother’s steadfast stance of devoted resolution.
“Hand it over!” Nelyafinwë groaned, stretching out a blood-stained, long-fingered hand.
“Will you marry me?” Findekáno asked, holding the lethal blade out of reach.
He knew not why these words had burst from his lips so uncouthly—he’d always envisioned a long courtship full of peaceful walks and tense repasts in flowering meadows—but he couldn’t deny that it felt right.
Surely, Nelyafinwë also sensed their uncanny link. Didn’t he?
Imprudent and nonsensical as his paroxysm of desperate affection was, he stood firm under the bemused scrutiny of those gorgeous, stormy eyes.
“Is that a proposal? Once I’m out of here, I’ll literally give you my hand in marriage,” Nelyafinwë chuckled darkly.
“Don’t you have to consult your parents?”
“You have no idea how much they’ve hidden from me,” the other commented with an exasperated sigh. “Serves them well. I can’t shake the feeling that this, gruesome as it is, was meant to happen. So, may I have your knife as a token of your suit?”
Surrendering the weapon wordlessly, Findekáno felt his heart soar—he slung his strong arms around the cool, slick legs of his fiancé to steady him and keep him from plummeting to his death as soon as he’d escaped his bonds.
It was wrong, he knew, but—standing on the edge of disaster while blood and rain plastered his tunic to his heaving chest—he was perfectly happy.
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