#absolute dumbasses
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Since my health insurance is through the state (because being a grad student doesn't get me health insurance and also doesn't pay enough), I have to report any change in income when it happens, which as of the last time (at the start of the summer contract), has become even more stupidly difficult, because I have to call it in instead of them having a functional website that can do things like that (which is how it has been), but they've gone from hours of (I think?) 8-5 to instead 9-3, and every. single. fucking. time. I call in, I get a message of "I'm sorry, we're experiencing an unusually high call volume right now" followed by automatic hang-up.
YEAH NO SHIT YOU'RE EXPERIENCING UNUSUALLY HIGH CALL VOLUME DESPITE IT BEING NOT RENEWAL SEASON, YOU'VE CHOPPED YOUR FUCKING HOURS AND I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF YOU CUT YOUR STAFF, TOO.
anyway, got through that, figured that I was done with that until late August, when the school-year contract kicks in, and then they sent me a letter wanting me to submit proof of income. Submitted copies of my previous school year's contract along with the summer contract. Got another letter, dated after I already submitted my fucking documents. They still want documents. Now I'm trying to call again to force them to admit that my contracts are perfectly fucking valid forms of proofs, and I am once again getting the "unusually high call volume" message.
IT'S NOT UNUSUALLY HIGH CALL VOLUME IF THE CALL VOLUME IS ALWAYS THIS FUCKING HIGH-
#whining#absolute dumbasses#if they had an online portal on their specific website to report changes in income call volume would be much lower#do they actually think that most people who are in need of low-income state-provided health insurance have enough flexibility in their jobs#to deal with this runaround phone call nonsense#also the people who respond do not seem trained half of the time#when I was doing seasonal work they would delete the previous work I did that year half of the time#this time when calling in summer I kept giving the lady one number and she kept taking off $500 when repeating it back
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She CATCHES that blush on his face, and at the feeling of his hand grazing hers, she finds that a dust of pink spreads across HER OWN face. "MHMM-- they have a LOT of options! That's why I love them so much." She had heard the chatter of their guildmates, and even some of the female members in the guild had tried to get her to ask him to go on jobs with her. But what was their ALTERIOR MOTIVE?
@foxborn
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Specialist
#HELLO KNY PEEPS DID YOU MISS ME#shoutout to me and all the clowns who are still happy about gettin 5 episodes#kimetsu no yaiba#kny#demonslayer#demon slayer#digital art#genya shinazugawa#genya#kny genya#ibispaintx#inosuke hashibira#demon slayer inosuke#kny inosuke#inosuke#i laughed in the middle of the street when i got this thing in my mind#yall have to deal with me being a dumbass who think shes funny af#there are absolutely no rules in the ways shadows works in my drawinga
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Part 2/2
By the time Stanley had realized he wasn't as alone as he believed himself to be entrapped in this ravenous abyss; he had honestly begun to suspect that he was finally starting to properly lose his mind.
In all the ceaseless miles that Stanley had journeyed during his apparent permanent residence within the dark devouring void, not once had he encountered another conscious, walking, talking being similar to himself. Every other formerly living creature that he had crossed paths with had been so... silent. Empty. Dead, in every sense of the word. It was as though the very essence of life itself had been sucked out of their bodies with a straw, their forms slowly falling apart piece by piece under the vicious gluttony of the darkness that surrounded them. They looked like they actually were supposed to be there, unmoving and comatose, unlike him.
So, when Stanley first began to encounter the twins, all of a sudden, he wasn't the only one in the dark.
When meeting the first pair of them, he found himself standing in a lake.
He hadn't even noticed the changes at first. It felt as though he had been walking for weeks on end, his body moving purely on autopilot and his aching legs leading him towards a destination only it knew. A thick fog of forgetfulness and flickering memories had descended upon his brain like a heavy blanket of numbing static as he had traveled. In this absentminded state, he hadn't even realized that the ever-present undulating, buzzing darkness surrounding him had begun to gradually shift and morph to form a horizon line; stretching into tall looming cliffsides that almost seemed to close in on him. Once the nonexistent floor beneath his soles abruptly began to ripple and warp, like the disturbed surface of a shallow puddle; only then did he finally notice his transformed environment.
The transition was seamless, almost dream-like. One moment, he was still surrounded by that filthy, overwhelming abyss; and the next, his boots were suddenly plunged deep into the cold, dark lake water.
The silence didn't leave, however. It still choked and stuffed its way into Stanley's ears to clog up his mind with thick cotton; the eerie quiet not quite matching the calm, almost serene scenery the void seemed to have abruptly transformed itself into. Like a movie with its sound cut off; leaving only the unsettling hum of the projector to fill the empty air.
It was odd. The lake was surely incredibly deep. He could obviously tell from how thin and pathetically small the shores appeared all the way from where he now unceremoniously stood in the middle of the lake. Stan could look down and see the darkness below his feet swallow what meager light that managed to break through the murky waters. The overwhelming black almost seemed to beckon him, gaping and haunting; a bottomless underwater pit of pitch black that never seemed to end.
And yet, he didn't sink. Stanley remained perfectly level, the almost ink like waters stopping just at ankle level, as though he were held up just above the surface by some invisible force. Even the writhing waves seemed small and low, as though the waters were shy to climb up his legs further than that. It was odd, so very odd.
However, it wasn't nowhere near as odd as the sight that greeted him when he finally lifted his eyes from the waters.
Stanley had crossed paths with truly unbelievable sights in this strange somewhere; from bursting, collapsing stars; to the imploding heat death of entire universes, but none of them seemed to hold the candle to what he saw then when he lifted his eyes:
Children.
Two, to be exact. Two, nearly identical looking children stood motionless before him; completely soaked through to the bone as though they had taken a plunge into the frigid water that pooled around their ankles. It was a girl and a boy, both adorned with twin expressions utterly devoid of emotion, their wide eyed stare seeming to burn holes into his thin jacket. Their drenched clothes sagged off of their scrawny frames; thin rivulets of water dirpping off of them and disturbing the glassy surface of the water at their feet. The little girl's hair had messily stuck to her face in thin sodden strands, her cheeks still full and round with youth just like the boy's. They looked young. Too young to be in a place such as this.
Oh, but their eyes; their eyes.
They burned with such anger; such injustice, brighter than any dying star or galaxies he had ever seen. Anger towards the world, to fate, to whatever cruel deity that had deemed them fit to be sent to this wretched place so prematurely. They were too young to be here; to be entrapped like he was amongst this hungry darkness. And yet, here they were, sheer denial against their own untimely deaths being the only thing keeping them awake and conscious amongst the dead and rotting. A show of juvenile defiance to nature itself so vehement even the all-consumign darkness seemed hesitant to devour them whole just yet.
It saddened him. It saddened him to know that they belonged there, that they were supposed to be there. He could see it, he could feel it; they were dead. No amount of determination could deny that universal fact.
When they spoke, Stanley could hear anger:
Stan chuckled in a futile attempt to lighten the suddenly heavy atmosphere that threatened to crush him whole. "A lake monster? You kids and your imagination," he teased, hoping to somehow rid the poor kids of the haunted look that seemed to whirl in their glares. No child should have been burdened with such a knowing look; such eyes that looked like they had seen everything there was to see about the world, the horrid and the good.
Clearly, it had been the wrong thing to say, and Stanley's faux pas was rewarded with a scowl from the little boy. A world's worth of sour contempt etched into every contorted groove that his grimace seemed to dig into his much too young face. Stan suddenly felt guilt squeeze at his weary bones for having caused that.
"That's what they all said," the boy spat out, eyes shining with a sheen of wetness Stan wasn't sure he was prepared to deal with.
Stan left that first interaction with the twins with the feeling of guilt and sorrow still clining to him.
He couldn't have known, at the time. He couldn't have known that this wouldn't be anywhere near the last time that he would meet the pair. He hadn't realised just how many of them there were. After that first pair, his endless journeying within the Abyss was hardly be spent alone anymore. Countless more times, he came face to face with the exact same two young and impossibly worn faces; forced to meet one pair of beaten and bruised kids after another.
Not one pair had died the same death as another. Some had gotten lost, prey to whatever threat that had snatched them up out in the open; some had fallen from high up; some had been crushed under an incredible weight; some had burned; some eaten alive; some zombified. Some didn't even seem physically harmed at all, body perfectly intact, and yet that same faraway, distrubed look in their eyes remained.
He thought the worst ones were the ones he found alone. A little girl or a little boy, left all lonesome without their other half there. Twins, he remembered a pair of them telling him once.
Once, he had come across a town full of silent, stone statues. It was a rustic, shabby, almost nostalgic looking town- odd and strangely familiar. The sight of it had tugged at an aged memory that had long since wasted away in the back of his mind. It was serene, almost deceptively so. The sun shone; the air smelled crisp and fresh; numerous waterfalls continued to crash down from the tall cliffsides; and a soft nonexistent breeze whistled through the thicket of pine trees that blanketed the outskirts of the town. None of it seemed to match the gruesome scene of the hundred wailing statues that littered every inch of the town.
He had found the boy's statue on the other side of town, deep within the green forest and toppled over the gnarled roots of a towering tree. Like the rest of the townsfolk, he too, was frozen mid-shriek; his stone face twisted and contorted into a mock impression of a silent scream as his body lay paused in a writhing struggle. He made sure to be gentle when he carried the boy's statue over to place it beside the girl's, whose statue stood far deeper into the forest, sporting the same rictus grimace of terror as her brother's. It somehow felt wrong for them to have been so far apart from one another, even in death.
He had come to dread meeting of the twins. He hated every second he had to confront yet another pair of dead children that did not belong here, but fate had decided they did. He despised having to listen to their tales of woe as they wept about the injustice of the world, of having died young; he despised himself for being unable to do more than weep with them.
"We don't belong here, Grunkle Stan," he would listen to the little girl weep, calling him a title he didn't recognize. He never remembered if they had ever told him their name, but they all seem to know his, without a fail. "If we're dead, then what about you? What about Grunkle Ford? Mom? Dad? What about them? We can't be dead, we can't be," they would say, confusion and frustration written all over their faces. They didn't understand. They didn't understand why they had come to the darkness so early, so unfairly.
He never knew what to say, he'd never been good with words.
All he could do was kneel down to their levels and engulf them in his arms, hoping he could somehow squeeze the pain straight out of their bodies in his embrace. He hugged them, because what else could he do?
#OKAY SO YOU KNOW THAT ONE SCENE IN THE BOOK OF BILL OR SMTH WHERE THEY SHOW ALL THE ALTERNATE UNIVERSE VERSION OF DIPPER AND MABEL#WHEN THEY WEREN'T AS LUCKY AS THEIR ORIGINAL COUNTERPARTS#THAT'S WHO STAN MEETS HERE#I need you people to know that I had to rewrite this whole thing like 3 times because my dumbass#was writing a whole ass fic in TUMBLR DRAFTS so obviously it kept deleting itself <3#but it was worth it for the Stan angst <3#watch how many trigger warnings I can fit in this post#tw child death#tw death#tw dead animals#tw graphic description#tw graphic violence#tw graphic#tw body horror#tw scopophobia#tw gore#TELL ME IF I GOTTA TAG MORE!!#gravity falls#gravity falls au#HWINEBHABWNAJCAHOWEEATOWEUB AU#stanley pines#stan pines#grunkle stan#dipper pines#mabel pines#pines twins#absolutely not beta read- so if there are any grammar mistakes or plot holes... shhhhhh you saw nothing...#my writing#my fic#my art
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IVE DONE IT!! (not exactly sure what it is in this situation but it sure is done)
Rumble n Frenzy would bully screamer any chance they get
Soundwave on the other hand needs payed vacation because that man has to put up with so much crap
#seekers have talons and I will not change my mind on this#I was one of th people cheering on SW in Skybound because honestly he deserves to snap#as a little treat to himself#decepticons#cassetticons#transformers#transformers g1#transformers idw#i ship soundstar in an old toxic married couple kind of way#rumble and frenzy#with cassettes like you who needs autobots#I still have absolutely no clue how to tag for the TF fandom yet#art#my art#fanart#animation#animatic#I never know what these count as#my dumbass had to search up how to spell chauffeur correctly 3 times while making this#sorry to all of my followers that know nothing about Transformers#decepticons are my toxic found family and I hold them like precious stones#I also put them in my mouth and crunch them like precious stones
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so on the subject of the "Crowley is secretly Revaan/Laverne/Levin/please Twst give us his name" theory, I think my feelings are best summed up as "I don't really buy it, but it's funny". like, in all seriousness, I'm not opposed to it; I have enjoyed the writing in Twst so far and I'm willing to trust that whatever happens will, you know, make sense and not be terrible. but I'm just not really convinced by the current evidence! maybe that'll change once we learn more, we'll see!
with that said, may I propose a few alternate theories about the possible Crowley/Revaan connection:
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#on this installment of things nobody asked but i'm going to talk about anyway#disclaimer that this is mostly a joke please don't get mad at me#(legit no shade to anyone) (speculation is one of the fun things about an ongoing fandom and you never know what'll turn out to be true!)#more seriously i do think there may be some connection that just isn't clear yet#but the more little breadcrumbs we get about what revaan was like the more i think crowley just doesn't act like him#i adore crowley don't get me wrong#(yes he's a dipshit. this is a feature not a bug.)#but like.#not to harp on the scene about lilia's nrc invitation (i am absolutely going to harp on it)#i do not believe that crowley would go through the trash to fish out the pieces and put them back together and save them#just because it was lilia's. just because lilia might want it again someday.#crowley can ✨yasashii✨ all he wants but we know what he's like#and i REALLY do not believe that lilia wouldn't recognize him. i didn't believe it before and i extra don't believe it now.#then again i do tend to be incredibly off about speculation so! who knows! i will trust the writing for now!#i do 100% believe that meleanor would fall in love with the world's biggest dumbass and then double down super hard. that part tracks.#that said i have decided that ambrose being revaan is actually the funnier option just because it would make crowley SO mad#it wouldn't make sense for him to be mad about it and that would just make him madder
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some people will really see elliot page simply existing and feel like it’s their right to say the weirdest shit about him. it’s really incredible (and i mean that in the most literal sense of fucking unbelievable) how openly these people admit that they think we exist solely to benefit them — no lives of our own, no autonomy. as far as they’re concerned, we’re just here to look pretty and have their babies, to decorate and populate their world.
this is why i really just have to laugh when someone tries to argue that transmasculinity is anti-feminist. can’t you see how much our mere existence makes the misogynists short-circuit? how much our transitions go directly against all of the expectations they put on us? transmasc transitions are in such direct opposition to their worldview that they resort to just treating us like we’re dead because our lives simply are not compatible with their version of how the world should be. we make ourselves so egregiously and irrevocably unfuckable to them that they’re actually going around unironically mourning the “loss” of our bodies.
#if you cant tell i havent had it in me lately to make big long posts#but i absolutely do have it in me to laugh at the dumbasses i come across on twitter#examples of transandrophobia#transandrophobia#transandromisia#transmisandry#virilmisia#virilphobia#anti transmasculinity#transmascphobia#trans men#transmascs
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July 20, 2024
#uscdc doing an absolute bang-up job as usual 🙄😑#sick of these dumbass airborne pandemic speedruns#h5n1#avian flu#bird flu#twt
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I'm also still laughing that he really showed up, introduced himself as an Archivist of the Cobalt Soul, and then insinuated that they were going to go extrajudicially hunt down, capture, and "interrogate" a Cerberus Assembly Archmage. Sir, archivists do not do that kind of thing, least of all on their own, LEAST OF ALL with a bunch of random hooligans they were just sent to collect for an unrelated excursion. Quite honestly, that was the thing I kept going back to in evidence of, there is absolutely no way this is a legit archivist.
#sir you kNOW how the cobalt soul works#why didn't you use 'expositor'#'trained sorcerer' THE COBALT SOUL IS NOT TRAINING SORCERERS#SORCERERS DON'T GET TRAINED#you lying idiot. you absolute dumbass. you beautiful fugitive who has miraculously stayed alive for seven years.#I love him SO much#but actually his bit about his mother being a barmaid was actually deeply charming and that was the one moment I had a sliver of doubt#the way he delivered that bit was great and I do joke but he is a very good liar when he really needs to be#he's charming! he's got high charisma! he's a delight! he can spin a tale!#also honestly very funny for me personally. for tiefling fic reasons.#cr spoilers#essek thelyss#critical role
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DBD True Crime AU
Charles and Edwin's bodys are burried together.
Someone is investigating Charles' death, eventually it gets enough steam that they get permission to escivate his grave... except there's two bodys there.
No DNA match, but its way older than Charles' body, from around the time another boy disappeared... so they track down the Payne family and see if they can match the DNA.
Of course, it does.
This, of course, spurrs a massive conspiracy that the school snuck the other boys remains in Charles's casket to cover up Edwin's death.
The Payne family pays for a proper burial for Edwin, but Charles, liking that he and his best mate have been together forever literally, moves the body back, much to everyone's confusion and shock.
Que a series of more bizarre ways people try to keep Edwin's bones in place, and the boys (to Niko's amusement , and Crystal's headache) keep moving them back. Sometimes they lay the bones next to eachother, sometimes they're high fiving. Charles likes wrapping his arm around Edwin's shoulder.
On one memorable occasion, Charles was so annoyed they kept being separated, he jumbled their bones around.
Now the bones are in the British museum on display with a few words about each of the boys, (there's an excerpt from one of Edwin's journals from when he was alive. There's a quote from one of the boys who attacked Charles about what a good mate he was.)
Charles and Edwin go and visit the bones sometimes, rearranging them again and again. They eventually leave the bones behind after having them hold hands.
(Edwin defacing museum property bc 'that is embarrassing, Charles. I hardly thought anyone would ever read that.' He also obviously crosses out what Charles's "friend" had to say.)
(There's one podcaster who is convinced the two met time travel style and fell in love, and they can't even be separated in death. She's practically laughed off her show, but Niko loves the show.)
#this is about dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives#edwin dead boy detectives#edwin payne#charles rowland#charles rowland dead boy detectives#the bones start holding hands after they finally start dating#Charles absolutely switched their bones around once#like charles had edwins arm and vise versa#the media lost their shit about desicrating bodys#charles HATES he's in the british museum and at least once a year he moves their bodys back to his original grave#they always get brought back#the country thinks is a really skilled really dedicated theif#CRYSTAL thinks its teo codependent dumbasses#NIKO thinks is romanic
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FE Houses Doodles
#carrying over my posts from twitter choo chooooo#fe3h#fire emblem#2024 art#haha its the dummy nobles again#you cannot escape#hubert would absolutely hate being called a dumbass noble so he's included too#everyone else is just a cute gal trapped in a world of stupid uwu
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Time: *sighs* We can’t manipulate, mansplain, malewife our way out of this one, Captain
Warriors: *loosening his scarf just a bit* Manwhore it is
#i dunno if this has been done before but it came to me in a vision#wars is ace to me but i dont think he’s afraid to bat his eyelashes to get what he wants#hes pretty he knows it and he’s used it to his advantage before#absolute dumbass#incorrect quotes#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu warriors#lu wars#warriors linked universe#linked universe warriors#lu time#time linked universe#jes talks
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Making up for lost time 💖
Bonus: Fuyu just a few weeks ago (lying her ass off)
#chaser game w#asianlgbtqdramas#asiandramasource#jdramasource#dailyasiandramas#asiandramaedit#japanese gl#hayashi fuyu#harumoto itsuki#right... fuyu you gay dumbass i love you so much#you are SO lucky itsuki absolutely ADORES YOU#myedit
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Two former military elites taking merc jobs perform absolutely hellish battle tactics together.
#ffxiv#digital art#zenos yae galvus#estinien wyrmblood#adventurer zenos#I will always adore this duo conceptually#because like- socially theyre that aragorn-geralt brooding in a corner of a tavern meme#but in combat they are absolutely terrifying#the azure dragoon and the super soldier legatus are here to fuck up a poachers day#aka zenos is about to crossmap someone's airship cause he knows estinien cant make himself jump that far#why have him try to jump when he can just Olympic-level javelin toss this man#also guys#my dudes#all this time I've been working on adven!zenos being a tank#I... have realized I just write him like a warrior who isnt carrying a weapon- sturdy unkillableness and countering and all#I am only a little bit of a dumbass but orogeny just seems to live in my head rent free#it also gave me the terrifying concept of- after spending time with the scions and after the ultimatum-#of him trying to learn more about dynamis- and zenos being zenos starts learning eventually how to harness it#local calm apathetic man can berserk on command because he's a lot angrier/more expressive inwardly than most people expect#depending on how I look into it- it might be how he fuels most of his shinryu transformations but I'll have to work on it more#but ANYWAYS#I love the thought of these two hunting and working together#and estinien being tossed being turned into a tactic#especially with proper form#this is something ive wanted to draw for a very long time and im very happy I actually have the skill to do so now
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#tumblr polls#polls#Sorry if the wording is weird. I thought ''be considered X where I live'' would make the most sense since 'tallness' or etc. is sort of#subjective to the people around you or your specific culture/area/etc. And if I just said ''I'm tall'' or ''I'm short'' then#the response might be 'well how do I define whether I'm tall or not?'' or etc. But then most people could probably look#at the people around them in daily life they interact with and compare based on that to get a more literal idea or something#..ANYWAY.. lol.. as usual just thought of some random thing and was like.. hrmm... i wonder what the most common#feeling about that would be.#personally I'm not even short but I just want to be really really tall... like... 7 feet tall or something. In a fantasy world type of way#of course. so like a super tall elf creature. More realistically I suppose you get health problems past a certain point#so maybe I'd be happy with 6'2“ or so.#Absolutely no hate towards people with this preference but I've always had trouble understanding the idea of wanting to be shorter#so you're Small And Cute or this and that. or whatever the base reason is. I suppose I would understand it from a surivval prespective#maybe you want to be able to hide in your environment easier and blend into a crowd. I personally would like people to be inspired to run#away from me when they see me though gjhbj#In an average grocery store or something just a normal day but then some 8 foot tall wizard man walks in and so everyone#kind of backs away slowly = yaaay I get the aisle all to myself and can shop for my produce in peace.#(except for the fact that there's a subsection of people who would intepret it as spectacle and would run towards instead of away#and pull out their dumbass phones to film Weird Thing Happening. in which case. spell of 'phone melts into molten plastic in your hands#stop filming strangers in public without their consent' be cast upon ye. )
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what do you call this specific flavor of dynamic
#and why do i fucking love it sm.#dumbass coworkers? toxic bffs? bastard x likes the bastard and is mad about it? insufferable husbands?#they're both besties but i can't prove it!!!! i swear they're like the besties ever i promise#same characters different font tbh. asigiri and gege working together to make the funniest duos in their respective series#auuughhh i love tired perfectionist blonds who wear glasses and are absolutely fucking done with their one specific coworker#jjk#bsd
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