#a woman is anything I say it is - incredible logic

[bumblingbabooshka]

Thinking about marriage/women's rights on Vulcan Some may think that T'Pring not being allowed to divorce Spock was because he was going through the pon farr but if she were allowed to divorce him at all she probably would have done that a long time ago, confirmed by T'Pol when she's speaking with Koss, who isn't suffering from the pon farr. She says that he can choose another mate (without invoking a fight it seems: note the difference between a 'mate' and a 'challenger') and after he makes it clear that nothing she says will change his mind about marrying her, she finally threatens to declare a kal-if-fee. It's clear that Vulcan women cannot divorce/refuse to marry a man they've been betrothed to under any circumstances if A) He himself doesn't consent to ending their marriage or B) She doesn't have someone else waiting in the wings to be given to in his stead. Though, if the challenger she selects fails to win the fight, she'll have to marry her betrothed anyway unless (again) he decides he doesn't want her after the challenge. That seems like an incredibly unfair system, heavily biased towards men. SNW is an alternate universe in many obvious respects but most egregiously in that T'Pring has a lot of non-canonical agency over her relationship with Spock. It's interesting to me that Vulcan society has women in many positions of power and treats women as equal to men from what I've seen despite these laws. We don't really see Vulcans exhibiting a misogynistic attitude towards women in general but in TOS (perhaps because of its general writing style but it's still interesting to note) both Sarek and Spock take on patriarchal attitudes specifically regarding wives. Amanda says that 'of course' Sarek commands her because "he is a Vulcan and I am his wife." It's worthwhile in my eyes to note that she specifies 'wife' instead of attributing this attitude to women as a whole. Again, with TOS' writing style it wouldn't be out of place for her to say "he is a man and I am a woman." Spock, while in a pon farr induced irritation, states that it's "undignified for a woman to play servant to a man that isn't hers" - again implying that there's something specific about being a Wife in Vulcan society which is different from being a woman in general and demands subservience to a husband. This could perhaps stem from the extreme sense of ownership that Vulcan law has permitted men to have over women. A woman legally cannot point blank refuse marriage. There is no option which guarantees she won't have to marry her betrothed other than death. When T'Pau speaks of T'Pring she refers to her as being 'property' and Stonn, before being interrupted, states he's made 'the ancient claim' - we don't know what this is because he gets cut off but it's obvious they're both using the language of Vulcan law. Men are permitted true freedom to choose. If a woman wants to choose someone else to be with there is no option available to her other than the kal-if-fee which might result in the death of the one she wants to be with. And, if her lover fails, her husband can still just decide he wants to marry her and she'll be forced to. T'Pring gives two scenarios: One where Spock 'frees' her and one where he doesn't - it's still ultimately his decision which is clear when he ends the conversation with "Stonn, she is yours." This again isn't just because of the pon farr as T'Pol also goes through this. Koss can choose another mate and when the option is talked about there's no implication that this would result in any sort of fight (both by the casualness of its mention and by the fact that there's no formal word for it unlike the kal-if-fee.) Also, the fact that Koss does eventually grant T'Pol a divorce and it's all fine means that T'Pol isn't lawfully required to have another man waiting if her HUSBAND doesn't want her. It's ONLY required if SHE doesn't want her husband. Tradition must take precedence over individual desire UNLESS!!! You're a man. Then it's fine. Like, your parents might not be happy but legally you're golden.

[regularwomen]

You say you feel like a woman. Why does that make you a woman?

There are people who feel they are animals. Why aren’t they animals?

There are people who feel like they are fictional characters. Why aren’t they fictional characters?

There are people who feel like they are people of colour. Why aren’t they people of colour?

Why is womanhood uniquely available for parody and mockery? Why is woman a term that can’t be strictly defined? What is it you feel that is inherent to womanhood? I don’t think most women feel anything like that, does that make them not women? Are you somehow an expert on womanhood to the point that you can say that what you feel is related to being a women, despite not being one?

What is a woman?

Why does that make you a woman?

[ducksido]

Ruggie Vs Trans!Yuu

Aka how would Ruggie react to a mtf!yuu and ftm!yuu (This keeps coming to me in dreams)

🐾 Ruggie Bucchi with a MTF!Yuu

At first, Ruggie doesn’t even blink when Yuu comes out as a trans woman. He’s from the Wild Savannah, a place with deeply ingrained social structures, sure—but he’s also incredibly adaptable, observant, and street-smart. His immediate reaction? A grin and a shrug.

“Eh? That so? Cool, good for ya, Yuu.”

But internally?

Ruggie definitely has a knee-jerk hyena instinct moment.

Like, his brain short-circuits just a bit. Something ancient and primal in his hyena-coded instincts goes:

"Oh. Dominant female. Respect immediately." Even if logically he knows Yuu wasn’t born with the physical traits associated with Wild Savannah females, the second she claims that identity—his instincts click into place. His tail would tuck between his legs.

He doesn't fear her like she’ll hurt him—but it’s this weird mix of:

admiration,

caution,

and a little submissiveness.

He starts calling her "Boss" half-jokingly, but also half-seriously. Like:

“Heh, remind me not to get on your bad side, Boss Lady.”

He absolutely respects her transition and identity, never misgenders or deadnames. He’s too sharp to make that kind of mistake—and he hates when others do. He might even go out of his way to “correct” someone in a passive-aggressive Ruggie way:

“Ohhh, ya meant her. You know—Yuu. Use your words right, yeah?”

Ruggie also probably gets weirdly defensive if someone tries to undermine her femininity.

He’s not one to throw hands unless money’s involved, but he’ll get right up in someone’s face if they say anything disrespectful. Especially if it triggers that Savannah-born instinct that says, “You do not mess with a female.”

If they're close or dating? He spoils her so hard—but lowkey. Steals snacks she likes. Calls her “princess” in that teasing-but-means-it way. Lets her borrow his jacket. Always offers his arm when walking through crowds.

And behind closed doors, he tells her:

“Ya know, you don’t gotta prove nothin’. You are who you say you are. That’s more than enough.”

🐾 Ruggie Bucchi with a FTM!Yuu (trans)

At first, Ruggie’s reaction is super casual. You tell him you’re a guy, and he just nods with a lazy grin.

“Aight, cool. Thanks for tellin’ me, dude.”

But internally? Oh, boy. His Wild Savannah brain is reconfiguring itself like a whole operating system update just happened.

Because in his homeland? You were born with the body that usually meant "intimidating," "dominant," or "don’t mess with." So when you step forward and go, "Nah—I’m a guy," something ancient in his instincts gets reversed.

That little hyena instinct that usually flinches around dominant females? Now it’s like:

“OH—HE’S a guy. A guy who was born in a female-coded body and still carries that presence? That’s terrifying. I love him.”

There’s this weird subconscious respect/fear combo, and you better believe he starts treating you like someone who could kick his ass—even if you’re not threatening at all.

He might say stuff like:

“Jeez, you’re kinda scary, huh? Not like, bad-scary—just, y’know... cool-scary.”

But like, respectfully.

Once the dust settles in his brain, he genuinely supports you. Ruggie knows what it’s like to fight for space, for respect, and for survival. So when he realizes you’re walking your own path, being your true self no matter what? He respects the hell out of that.

He’ll defend you if anyone misgenders you:

“Uh—he said no pickles on the sandwich, yeah? Get it right.”

He becomes your little gremlin guard dog. Not in a loud way—just in the “he will use is UM and make them trip and say it was an accident” kind of way.

If you’re dating? Ohhh boy, he’s SO proud of you. You might find him subtly hyping you up all the time.

“Look at you, handsome. You’re gonna give me a complex if you keep lookin’ this good.”

He’s the type to toss you his hoodie and then blush because you look more masc than him wearing it.

Also: he absolutely brags about you when no one’s around.

“Yuu? Oh yeah, he’s a badass. You don’t wanna mess with him. He’ll take you down and correct your grammar while he’s at it.”

[roachliquid]

An incredibly pernicious anti-transmasc argument that keeps making the rounds is that everything we do was plagiarized from trans women.

Coining a term to describe our unique and gendered experiences of oppression? We're just copying trans women.

Complain that we're often rejected from queer circles for our perceived violent maleness? We're just parroting what's happened to trans women.

Forcemasc fetish blogs? We're just copying One Specific Trans Woman-Run Blog that got popular.

These claims are annoying on their own, but together they paint a clear picture of what transandrophobes want you to believe: that trans men and transmascs are incapable of creating anything ourselves, or if we did, it would have nothing in common with what trans women and fems are doing. The function of these claims is to convince you that trans people of seemingly opposite identities are equally opposite in experiences, and any evidence to the contrary is actually cultural appropriation fueled by jealousy.

This is gender essentialism. It's fueled by the radical feminist belief that "woman" and "man" are not so much terms that get abused to justify people's oppression as they are positions in a class conflict, one where All Men seek and/or directly benefit from the oppression of All Women, and that indeed, manhood and womanhood themselves are defined by this relationship to one another. To be a man is to be an entitled parasite; to be a woman is to be an overworked victim.

That notion is racist and transphobic on the face of it, and that is equally obvious in these arguments about trans men - all of which are predicated on the idea that the average trans man is white, well-off, and able to go stealth whenever necessary, and therefore benefits from the maximum amount of male privilege a trans man can be afforded. Following from that logic, any trans man or that you encounter online can be reasonably assumed to share that experience, and any mention he might make of trans men who fail to meet those qualifications is nothing more than a rhetorical cudgel that we use to deny our own privilege.

I'm sure you can see the problem there.

It's not surprising that I typically see these claims made by white women, frequently about Black and Indigenous men. Speaking from the perspective of a white person, it can be very easy to fall into a trap of thinking that our specific experiences with oppression makes us general experts, and grow defensive when someone provides knowledge that shows we were wrong. It can like we're being victimized on the basis of the oppression we do have, and it can be incredibly hard to stop, listen, and admit that we fucked up. This is doubly difficult when the person criticizing us is a member of a demographic that seemingly contributes to the oppression we face.

But just because we think it's happening doesn't always make it so. Yes, there are times when people are acting in bad faith, or overlooking their own areas of ignorance - to err, as they say, is human. But often, we're the ones in the wrong, and need to recognize that fact before acting. So where do we draw the line?

The thing that I've always found crucial is to stop, breathe, and think. We have to honestly ask ourselves whether the other party is saying "your experiences are not real", or just "your understanding of these issues isn't as all-encompassing as you assumed". Simply asking yourself "am I really being harmed, or do I just feel like I'm being harmed?" can often save you from a massive foot-in-mouth situation.

It's necessary to remember that people whose identities are different from our own have their own experience and knowledge. Unless they are coming out and telling us what problems we do or don't have, we need to trust that they're coming from a place of good faith and genuine knowledge, and be willing to listen and change our minds if necessary.

We have to make ourselves comfortable with the fact that we are not always the most, or only, important voice in the room.

That's something that a lot of anti-transmasc women love to remind us, and I wouldn't say they're always wrong. Simply being a man can and often does incentivize people to engage in misogyny, to talk over women and disregard their experiences, when we find them uncomfortable or irrelevant. Again - everybody fucks up sometimes. But it crosses a line when you start demanding that courtesy from others while refusing to extend it back to them; when you treat any information they offer as automatically inferior or entirely invalid, based solely on their perceived relationship to privilege.

In fact, doing so is literally an ad hominem argument.

Aside from that, I must point out that these arguments are being employed specifically to silence trans men's and mascs' voices. This is not an honest misunderstanding; it's an act of profound self-centeredness at best and outright malice at worst. How do I know this? Well, stop me if you've ever heard one of these before:

"Women don't have real interests; they just like silly frivolous things. Men's hobbies are real and meaningful."

"Women are inherently wired to be emotional. Men are logical and level-headed. I'm not sexist, it's just science."

"If you hear a woman say anything smart, you can bet she learned it from a man."

These, too, are silencing tactics, historically (and currently!) used to devalue and silence the voices of women. In fact, they're things that I have personally heard and been affected by, as a trans man who has spent the vast majority of my life being seen and treated as a woman.

I didn't fall for it then, and I sure ain't falling for it now.

[dorabellingham]

Score me

warning: sexual intentions

characters: kylian x fem!reader

summary: when he scores the first hat trick for the new team and you surprise him at the hotel

request: yes!

may contain spelling and translation errors!

Kylian was still feeling the adrenaline running through his body when he left the stadium. A hat-trick. A damn hat-trick. He had never felt so good on the field. From the first goal, I knew that night would be special, but the third... the third was like a dream.

The locker room was a party. The companions mocked, threw water at him, even Ancelloti gave a proud smile. The fans were in ecstasy, and he knew that that was one of those nights that would remain forever in the memory.

But, as incredible as it was, there was something even better waiting for him.

When he finally arrived at the hotel, passing through the lobby still dressed in the team's official costume, he already felt a different anxiety. You hadn't gone to the game, but you texted saying you were waiting for him. His heart beat faster as he climbed the elevator.

Kylian opened the bedroom door and lost his breath at the time.

You were lying on the bed, your skin contrasting with a blue lace nightgown, delicate and at the same time provocative. The fabric embraced its curves in a way that defied any logic. The smile on yout lips was pure charm, pure temptation, and his eyes shone full of intention.

-Congratulations, mon amour.

Your voice came out soft, but with weight.

Your boyfriend locked the door without even looking.

He was still recovering from the impact, trying to absorb the vision in front of him. Your hair fell loose from your shoulders, the legs were shamelessly exposed, and that smile... my God, that smile.

-Did you like my game, ma chérie?

He asked, his voice hoarse in a sexy french, as he approached.

You laughed softly, leaning on your elbows.

-I loved it. You were amazing, Kylian.

He climbed on the bed without hesitation, getting on top of you, his dark eyes fixed on your own.

-And you... -Mbappe slid his fingers down your thigh, climbing slowly. -Is that what you were planning while I was playing?

You bit your lip, your smile growing.

-I wanted to congratulate you in the right way.

He didn't need anything else. His mouth found yours in an intense, hungry, celebratory kiss. The hands were already exploring every piece of exposed skin, the bodies fitting almost desperately. He felt his own heart beating fast, not only because of the adrenaline of the game, but because of the incredible woman who was there, waiting for him, making him the luckiest man in the world.

That night had already been perfect on the field. But now... now it would get even better.

[sgiandubh]

idk if you’ve watched it yet but in the 10th celebration video, the part where Sam says “we dnt even know when we’ll be released” and Caitríona’s reaction to it had me👀….like the rest of us it seems they too can’t wait for it all to end so they can finally “released” and free from St*rz clutches. But i thought that was interesting thing to take notice of

Dear Reaction Anon,

Of course I watched it. Friday, even. But I have a dinner to plan for Wednesday, my car to sell (plot thickens...), dinners in town and various people to see.... So, sorry for the delayed answer and so incredibly sorry for being also late to the Shipper Feast.

Almost everything has been dissected to death, as it always happens, but I might still throw in my two cents, after all. So, I'll simply relisten to that video as I answer you and hit stop every time something interesting that has not been mentioned in here yet, made me go hmmm, ok?

At the 01:35 mark, S: 'yeah, it was such a whirlwind, you know, I mean, going straight into screentests and then looking for THE Claire, and it took quite a while, and then this one landed in Scotland, you know, weeks before we just started'

Here is her reaction - definitely fed up with this peasant, right?

Also, as a side note, did you notice how emotional S gets every single time babies and domestic scenes are mentioned? For a man who supposedly has no family of his own, that is surely strange.

And then you are so, so right, Anon, this is how she reacted to his 'being in a bubble for ten years and we don't even know when we'll be released what the world looks like' comment:

Did I notice an impish smile? Well, I surely did, Anon - and so did you.

It was a smart move to watch them watch OL. I found it very interesting, lots of clues about their joint dynamic:

She, as always, is leading the pack. He is more reserved and usually takes his cues from her, constantly seeks her approval. Gradually relaxes as she seems to imply the context is 'safe enough' to loosen up a bit. And yes, this is all instinctive, by now. If I knew absolutely nothing about These Two and saw them act and react like this IRL, I would definitely have questions.

And yes, I think he could listen to her talking about WWII medical pamphlets and bandages for days and still never get bored. This guy still lives to make her laugh:

Psst, Anon - see how they hate each other, here? Which really makes me think the 'just promo/fan service' argument is borderline schizophrenic, really - and why is S wooden and clumsy when promoting anything else with ANY OTHER WOMAN in our galaxy, by the way? Also, S and McTavish pretending they were still friends at that MIK event in London was 'just fan service' - this? This is not really that.

And then, oh dear me darling, that photo. I can almost hear two different kinds of 'shiiiiit' reactions, here:

He knows he mustn't slip - as he usually does, she is more like 'shiiiiit, hehehe, see what we've done here'. Logically, then, he brings about that sorry modicum of an excuse 'I've been so jetlagged' (jetlag was actually the least problematic thing, in that pic, ROFL; also, there are two people in that pic, bless your 💖🤣). Followed by the only diversion he could think of: bringing in the 'thousands of people, that was incredible, blah blah' - and then she dutifully chimes in: ' I think we did Hall H...? the big one...?' (strange comments for a pic where one can see two very cozy and scantily dressed people, LOL). Dilute, dilute, dilute. But it's Horowitz reply that interested me the most: ' it's too bad you guys aren't photogenic, even after a long flight, like what a mess you guys look like, there':

He threw a bait, C took it: 'weeelllll...' and then Josh ended it with a simple, smiling 'please' that, in my mind, is on par with KDS' 'believe what you want'.

I also found very telling one of the last remarks by Horowitz, too: ' it's ok, they can't fire you now, it's too late, it's way too late'. Granted, it was about the trivia and allegedly in jest, but really?

And there you have it, Anon. Perhaps it's not much, but as always, I tried to take the road less traveled by. Thanks for giving me the opportunity.

[lilydalexf]

hello! I'm new to following you on Tumblr, but I followed your content from Golgle, I wanted to know if by any chance you knew of any fanfic in which Scully recovered her memories of the abduction, I've been wanting to read one like that for a while, but I can't find it, thanks!

Welcome, and thank you for the ask! Here are some good fics where Scully remembers something about her season 2 abduction. Enjoy!

12 Rites of Passage: Regression by Anne Haynes Part 9 of the 12 Rites of Passage series: Mulder and Scully seek a missing woman and discover frightening truths about their pasts. (Sequel to the series: 12 Degrees of Separation.)

Anamorphosis by Megan Reilly Assigned to find a horrifying serial murderer, Agent Scully discovers things about herself and her past that she never suspected.

Comfortably Numb by Paige Caldwell There is no pain...you are receding...a distant ship...smoke on the horizon...you are coming through in waves...Your lips move but I can't hear what you say...I have become comfortably numb...

The Cry of the Truth by A.I. Irving As their love affair unfolds, Scully reveals to Mulder a painful secret relating to her abduction. Mulder's reaction tests their bond and eventually leads Scully to discover a few truths about herself.

Dance Without Sleeping by wonderland (@amplifyme) Scully learns to live with her cancer and take back control of her life. Meanwhile, Mulder works on fulfilling a wish list. (Fic in the same universe: Into Each Other Sinking.)

grief by ms_starlight71 Scully goes in for a routine pap smear sometime post-cancer arc and has a panic attack/flashback related to her abduction.

i'm still in love with who i wish you were by comeherebooch “You were abducted, Scully,” Mulder said, sensing her confusion, “do you remember anything?” Post Requiem.

Ingénue by Punk (@punkm) Mulder and Scully investigate the circumstances surrounding a fifteen-year-old girl's multiple disappearances.

locking out the ghosts by skuls (@ghostbustermelanieking) Post-Emily arc, an emotionally vulnerable Scully breaks off the incredibly new relationship she and Mulder have recently been engaged in. As the season moves forward, how do they cope with this new development in their relationship, and how do the stressful situations their job puts them in affect this?

Malleus Maleficarum by Pellinor A stranger with a tempting offer promises hope in Mulder's time of need. Refusal could cost him and Scully their lives, but could the price of acceptance be greater still?

Movie Night by @nowwhateinstein “Talk about spooky,” he says as the movie fades to black and the credits begin to roll. She laughs and gives a small shake of her head. “That word,” she says. “It means something different to me now.”

Revanche by Ryo Sen Revanche - (noun) political policy designed to recover lost territory or status

Skin by Annie Sewell-Jennings In a world where Mulder and Scully have never met, fate intervenes and brings two worlds colliding in the city of Charleston, as a vicious murderer reigns and a storm approaches.

Right Hand Return by orphan_account An alternative universe in which Scully is returned from her abduction with a baby, no memories of anything prior to her captivity and some PTSD.

Time Can Heal by PostApocolypticAlien (@scullysexual) Mulder realises that his quest for the truth costs too much (WIP)

Truthseekers by Leyla Harrison (No summary provided)

until it heals by actualchangeling (@actual-changeling) Nightmares cannot be fought with logic or light, there is no way of expelling them from her brain, not a single moment of peace to catch her breath. Scully knows one thing that always helps, though. Or rather—someone. When she finds herself lost and drowning, she calls the one person in the world whom she trusts to keep her safe. She calls Mulder.

The Way by KMNAHILL and MD1016 Scully becomes mysteriously ill. Mulder, Melissa, and Tao help to heal her. / On assignment in Chicago, Scully’s illness progresses. / An assignment in Oregon turns out to be more than first expected. Humorous antics from the Lone Gunmen. / Samantha returns and isn’t what Mulder had expected.

White Light by aka_Jake While investigating a young woman's claim of alien abduction, Mulder and Scully are led on a cross-country chase of intrigue and murder. As they search for answers, Scully's own abduction memories resurface.

[valeriascoat]

You look at this young woman not far from you. Her hands are bloody and wounded, dirty bandages lying around. The bruises on her face begin to darken and her broken lip begins to swell. She looks incredibly tired, breathing slowly and looking ahead. Almost as a reflex, she still weakly clenches her fists, apparently still not moving away from the last fight.

You stare at her, as if enchanted. She doesn’t notice this, you don’t bother her with this, as long as she is somewhere very deep inside herself.

You assume she has a hard life. Something was breaking her so much that now the only thing she is holding on to is... You don’t know. You can't know what you haven't been told. It becomes interesting what happened to her. How is it that she has to fight every day - and it’s not about the ring, but about something inside. It can be seen. You see.

At some point you get up and leave, to get something and think about it at the same time. Would she mind? If she does, she will refuse and leave, or hit. She shouldn't be afraid of that. Yes, that sounds logical. But you still didn’t want to cause additional inconvenience.

Returning with the medical items, you slowly, but with an attempt at confidence, approach this young woman. Now you notice that her hair is dyed. The pink color is visible. Why did she hide such a pretty color of her natural hair?

– Hey... how are you?

Sitting in front of you, she slightly moved her shoulders and did not look up.

– Fine.

Idiot question. Fuck. You scratch your neck awkwardly.

– Sorry, it was stupid. Uh... Will you mind my company?

She doesn't answer at first. You are patiently silent, wait, don't rush her. A few minutes pass she finally sighs, nodding.

– Well, I don't mind.

You can feel her doubt in your skin. She didn't really want it, but she agreed. This made me happy, causing a slight smile. You sit down next to her, at some distance, so as not to be unpleasant.

– Thank you.

She doesn't say anything. You hesitate, but remain calm and unhurried.

– So... What's your name?

She seems to be joining the conversation a little. She draws her legs to her chest, crossing her arms and resting her head on them.

– Vi.

– Glad to meet you, Vi.

You speak in a kind, friendly tone. Vi sighs slightly. For some reason, it seems to you that she doesn’t feel any particular danger from you, but only because she’s not going to let you get close. Her cocoon does not change.

It's kind of awkward. You want to continue the conversation, but you can’t even think of the next question at the moment.

She asks it, turning her face slightly towards you.

– What is yours?

If it were possible to describe the state with signs, it would be “!!!!!!“

Her answering question pleased me more than it should have. You say your name, smiling at her. Vi seems a little... confused by your reaction. Such emotionality over such a trifle looks strange.

– ...nice to meet you too, i think.

Her answer is not rude, although her voice sounds with some very incredulous notes. But that's not to say she's tense. You're still not in the zone to harm her.

– Did you draw the eye shadow yourself? All this makeup? Is it your um.. image?

You ask simply, without any subtext. Curiosity is evident in your eyes.

Vi feels a strange pang inside. This is not an image. This is her life now. Not the image, but who the hell she is. But does anyone think otherwise?

– No. This is not an image. And... Yes, I did it myself.

You stop short. It was awkward that you misunderstood her, but hey, she calmly explained!

– Here's how... Looks great I think? You know, black contrasts so much with your eyes, and.. looks cool!

You stutter, suddenly unsure of how to say it better. But Vi chuckles a little. She doesn't quite understand why you're so nervous, but she doesn't judge. You don't know her, so there's no need for her to get angry to your words.

– Relax. Don't be nervous.

Her words cut you off, feeling ashamed that you even considered meeting her. The lips themselves stretch into a smile.

– Okay-okay, hehe. Sorry.

She relaxes her posture, lowering her leg and extending her hand to your shoulder.

– Why are you apologizing? You haven't done anything to me that you need to apologize for.

You try not to look at her hand on your shoulder. The fact that she even made this gesture. I relaxed a little. She herself calms you down from the burning stupid cheeks of awkwardness.

– Yeah, you right…

Vi is amused. In her chest, in her very essence, everything is still too heavy. Memories, thoughts, feelings that compress the ribs - they don’t go away anywhere. But for a moment, on top of it all, she allows a slight moment of relaxation to wash over her. A little.

She wanted to lightly hit you on the shoulder with her fist, when she suddenly winced, causing you to gasp along with her. She presses her palm against the knuckles of her other hand. Bleeding wounds reminded of themselves, the scabs on them painfully cracked.

You look at this and suddenly take her wrists in a careful grip, not even squeezing. You gently stroke the uninjured parts of her arms with your thumbs. Your own hands were cool, soothing her hot skin. Vi looks at you tensely, but doesn't do anything. The feeling is good. It forces her not to pull her hands away. And the fact that overall you seemed good to her too.

– I... uh... I have something and I can try to treat your wounds. Do you mind?

Helping someone will always be difficult, because you don’t know what will be right for this particular person. She doesn't answer. You start to get a little worried, but as soon as you look up at her face, you notice that she herself looks unsure.

A moment of vulnerability. Vi glanced at you and now she looks different - she this emotion. She snorts quietly, hiding her eyes.

– Do whatever you want.

Her answer is your permission. A little doubtful, but nevertheless she does not remove her hands, although they are slightly tense. Gently squeezing her wrists, you nod before breaking away from her and rummaging through her bag. You take out disinfectant and some dry wipes. After wetting them with it, you carefully clean her damaged knuckles. Vi hisses, and you gently blow on them, soothing the pain.

You treat her face the same way, avoiding her lips. Then you glue the patches on her cheek, and wrap her knuckles in bandages - just like before.

At this time, you only quietly said something about what you were doing. Vi was silent.

– Ready!

You tie a knot and check to make sure it doesn't feel too tight. Her palms are calloused and rough, but at this moment they feel amazingly tender. You wanted to treat them gently. The young woman slowly removed her hands from yours, kneading them. Still feeling your ghostly touch.

– Good.

Her approval makes your happy. The fact that you managed to help a little. Do what you wanted and not be blamed for unnecessary kindness.

– Thank you.

– Thank you.

The simultaneous pronunciation of this phrase makes you both laugh lightly.

It still hurt, either inside or her body. Where you treated it still ached, and her split lip throbbed. But your sudden appearance, as well as an innocent desire to do a little better, allowed her to smile. A little strange, but good.

You were glad that for once you managed to do something good for someone else. Clumsily, but sincerely. Seeing her feel just a little bit better brought warmth to your chest.

It felt like you knew her. Once upon a time. Just met again, at another time, in another life, in another universe.

You don't feel great overnight. Your burdens run deep, just like hers. But it seemed that meeting was... right.

At least in this scenario.

[balkanradfem]

So, in the light of sharing lesbian experiences, I thought I'd try sharing a story that makes me wary of dating; it ends in hubris, so be warned. It might make it more clear why I'm not trying to date the hot woman in my building! Click read more for a long sad lesbian story.

Years ago, I had a crush on a woman I met on tumblr. I started talking to her, and I told her honestly that I like her, and asked her if she was into women. She said yes! We started chatting and communicating daily, and after a bit we switched over to sending emails, so we could write long stories to each other. She was incredibly smart, talented, creative, she was a good storyteller, she knew so much about plants and animals, she had a garden, a dog, she lived in a country close to mine, so I could logically, at one point, sit on a train and meet her.

After we talked excitedly for a while, she told me she has a crush on me too. I was so happy. The unreachable scenario, your crush likes you back. I was living it, I was beside myself. I was dreaming of being in a relationship with her and how that would look like, and she was sending me flirty little messages in the emails. We kept talking, and slightly flirting with each other in our emails, and this went on for months. She would tell me about her life, experiences, past relationships, her art and books she wrote. I was into it all, I read anything she wrote or drew, I offered support whenever she was having a rough time or was bothered by something. I noticed at this point that if I send her my stuff, she doesn't really comment on it, but I felt okay about it, since I already had enough confidence, and wasn't looking to get praise.

During this time, I grew attached to her, I started to really love her. She was sweet and warm and so interesting to me. She knew a lot about stuff I didn't! Her stories and art were admirable and I remember fondly going trough it over and over. I felt a little bit like a child next to her, since she was 10 years older, and smarter, and I kept trying to prove that I too, am an adult, who knows stuff, and is smart. At one point we decided to have a video call, and I was so nervous, I had to go be outside to connect to a wifi, and I kept thinking what if it's awkward, what if we don't know what to say? I decided to tackle that issue by going trough a comic she drew and then using the call to give her tons of feedback, praise and opinions on it, it was a long comic so I was able to talk about it for an hour! She was happy to discuss it and our conversation went lightly and we had fun. I asked her at the end if she had a good time, and she said – yes, we talked about me the entire time! And I hadn't even realized that, until she said it. I think I felt a bit weird about it afterwards, because I do tend to fixate on people I like a lot, but ultimately, you know, we could talk about other things next time.

This is where things started feeling weird. We were talking for about 6 months then, and she was starting to disappear without notice. I wouldn't get my emails answered in a while, and every time I grew anxious and upset, wondering if I did something wrong, or she just got busy. At first I just blamed myself for, you know, being mentally ill, having abandonment issues, worrying too much. But I felt more anxious every time she'd disappear. I would sometimes have to go away too, for a few days, but I would always warn her, and let her know when I'd be away, and when I'd come back. She'd never say anything. So next time she disappeared on me, I asked her to please just let me know when she's leaving, because I easily get worried and miss her, and I do have some issues that make me feel abandoned. She said it was difficult for her to read this, because it makes her look inconsiderate in comparison to me, but she'll of course, say something next time.

She didn't. She kept both disappearing, and being too busy to respond to me. And even though we started talking with the idea of being in a relationship, it was never later discussed or prompted again, she only would add one flirty sentence to each email, so I'd know she's still interested. But now she was disappearing, or ignoring me, or  - just lost interest. I had to slowly realize that we were not, in fact, going to date. Because if she wanted to be in a relationship, surely by now it would be at least discussed or mentioned, and we would want to spend more time together, find out more about each other. And instead she was responding to me less, growing away from me, but still wrote in flirty lines. I was heartbroken, but also found it too difficult to keep pretending that it's going to happen, when it clearly was not, the contrast of what she was saying, and what was happening, was too much for me.

It took me a hot minute to gather my courage, and then I wrote to her that her disappearances are heavy on my mental health, and in order for me to feel normal about it, it's best if we continue as just good friends, and then I won't have to be stressed about why she's not responding to me. And she responded to that one instantly, saying no, we're going to date, in fact we can be dating now, she wants to. But this was instead, even more confusing to me, because why now? We didn't mention it for months, there was no progression towards it, she's organically responding to me less and less, obviously losing interest in talking regularly, she didn't care to warn me of her disappearances to ease my worry and anxiety over losing her, so how could she actually want to date? I sent her an email apologizing, calling myself an idiot, offering to talk her trough my mental process of making this decision, blamed it all on myself and my mental illness, but I couldn't bring myself back in the mindset of just, waiting for her messages, worrying if she was losing interest in me, worrying if I did something wrong and she didn't want to be with me anymore. It was mortifying to me.

I sent her further two emails apologizing and asking if she was okay, now worried if I hurt her with my giving up on romance, if she's maybe upset with me. I said sorry so many times and asked her to please share with me how this has affected her.

She never replied to any. She never talked to me again.

And I didn't understand, for a long time, what had happened there. Nothing made sense to me, in one second she was asking for a relationship, and then in the next moment she was done with me forever. I waited for a reply for such a long time, before I finally accepted that it's not coming, she wasn't... she wasn't interested in even being friends with me.

This was baffling, because I believed we had, in fact, created a good friendship over those 6 months! We learned about each other's lives, interests, pasts, we discussed ideas and art and feminism and capitalism, we told each other stories, we shared our struggles and days, we had our jokes and references, I had an entire library of her works and art in my head at this point and cared for her deeply. I thought we had a bond, and regardless of it being a friendship or a romance, we cared for each other. And I could see we weren't going to progress to a relationship, because she lost interest, or at least the desire to talk to me regularly, and I accepted it, so what was wrong?

Well, it would take me months more of thinking it trough and catching little hints and signs of things that were wrong. During our conversation, since I hoped that we would date, I would regularly try to prop her up and make her feel good about herself; I always wanted her to feel special and amazing, and would often shower her in praise and admiration. I wanted her to know that being with me would mean constant support and appreciation of everything good about her, and she'd get endless warmth and adoration, because this is what I thought relationships should be like, right, and I wanted her to know that's what I wanted for us. This sentiment was not returned to me in kind, but I didn't mind since I could already feel good about myself. She also didn't react if I sent her some of my work, but I would react to her stuff for ages, because I knew how good it is to get feedback on your own creation, anyone would enjoy that. I realized belatedly, that when she'd ask for support, I'd drop everything to reassure her and comfort her, and be mad at her behalf, while when I asked for support, she'd kinda side with me but still talk about herself. But all of these things were so subtle and tiny to me, I couldn't even see them over the excitement of 'my crush likes me back'.

I wondered, if she wasn't into me at all, then why didn't she just turn me down at the start, or somewhere down the line, she could tell me if she wasn't actually interested in dating me. Because if she seriously did want to date me, then she could have tried being friends with me, speak with me more consistently, show me that she was serious and that she does want to talk to me, and then try for a relationship later; it was unlikely that I would say no, I was filled with adoration for her. So she didn't want a relationship, and she didn't want a friendship, so why didn't she just say no to me?

Because she wanted the attention. She liked being adored and having someone pursue her so passionately. And the rest... didn't really matter to her. She would have only talked to me, and flirted with me, to have me believe we were going to date, and the second I didn't believe it, and I wouldn't pursue her in that way.. I was as good as dead to her. I was just a resource in there. She didn't care when I was starting to get hurt by being ignored by her, and she didn't care when I specifically said to her that I was struggling with mental health because she was trying to have me believe in something I saw wasn't true. She still tried to push me back into pursuing her after I gave up because of pain. She wanted the attention even when it was hurting me to give it.

I also tried to put myself in her shoes, and see how I would react in her place. I imagined if I had flirted with someone, and then ignored them for a while, and they then asked to be just friends. I don't think I would have even attempted to persuade them to go back to how they were before, because I would be horrified that I set this person up with false expectations, and then caused them pain by failing them. I would be relieved that they weren't mad at me for leading them on, and would feel awful for leading them on at all. But I also wouldn't even bring myself into this situation; if I had feelings for someone, and then realized they're fading away, but this person was still hopeful, or anxious, I'd have to set them straight and tell them what's up, so they could get a chance to move on. Saying 'no I actually want to date, lets go back to that' when I'm ready to drop them in an instant would be unthinkable to me.

What happened was so much worse than being rejected, or turned down. I was at this point wishing so badly that I had just been rejected. I would have moved on from that in a day or two. I had created a whole bond with a person who could not have cared less, and who dropped me the second I did something they didn't like. If I had known that's the reality of it, I would have never wanted to be friends, or anything else. And I also had no way of knowing, it was a shock when things turned out this badly.

I left that experience with some new conclusions. One was that I'll never try to date someone who makes me feel like a child. When I would feel dumb or childish next to her, she would poke fun at it and tease me about it, when I would genuinely feel not taken seriously, and I hated every minute of it, I hated having to prove that I'm an equal to someone. I also would no longer try to pursue anyone with so much love and attention. I might have been wrong to be so honest and direct with my intentions and my feelings. I set myself up for exploitation. It wasn't the first time I was exploited in that way either, this was just one of the worst ones.

After this experience, for a while I stopped liking people in general. Considering even being friends with someone, filled me with anxiety and exhaustion. I fell depressed and had thoughts about never talking to anyone again. I just didn't want to be put trough this again, and it took time for me to believe that a person can be that selfish and cruel, and hide it for so long, I didn't believe this could happen. I guess it hit me worse than it would have because I have abandonment issues, and this falls heavy on a heart of a person who's been abandoned before.

But anyway, I am feeling better now, and I'm very careful about having any kind of ideas about dating! I'm not interested in anyone who gives even the tiniest hint of mixed signals, or wanting to play with my heart, or promise anything unlikely or far down the line. If someone says they like me I won't even believe them! But, I'm keeping my honesty, and I won't set anyone up for this kind of pain. If I don't intend to be with someone, they'll know right away :).

[that-trans-autistic-guy]

why i love the edwin-crystal sibling like relationship from memory and why it makes me love crystal even more

there simply isn't enough online about 1. how awesome crystal is as a character and 2. how awesome her and edwin's relationship is. so imma dump all my thoughts here from pure memory.

ep1: so yeah, they start rough. but when jenny points out to crystal that she's so focused on her own problems that she's ignoring everyone else's, just like how she said the boys did, she resolves to change that. she realized she was being unfair because it was pointed out and she decided to try and be better. when edwin breaks down, she's listening. she's listening and understanding. she tells this boy, who has not been the nicest to her but she's beginning to understand, that she gets it. that she sees him, that his unnoticed death matters to her. she sees the sharp, jagged, raw and emotional parts of a boy that she'd only seen as cold and logical thus far. and when his unusually timid voice asks if they can focus on becky's case, she agrees. in the butcher shop, she offers to once again explain the internet to edwin. implying that she'd already done so. and she says it without any condescendence. when she's knocked to the ground, edwin helps her up and they sort of cling to each other as charles is reckless.

ep2: not as much here from what i remember but there's still some stuff. edwin does actually commend her actions in luring the sprites out, followed by telling her not to do it again. from an emotionally repressed boy from a time when fixing each other's clothes was the most intimate thing you could do in public, thats quite a big step.

ep3: one of my personal faves. crystal is quick to point out that edwin is jealous of her and charles. she does actually assure him that nothing would happen and its just a small show of her care for his feelings. now, in the house, do they bicker and argue? yes they do. but i would argue that most of that is fueled by their anxiety and fear for charles. when crystal points out that charles has issues, he ultimately listens. its shown immediately the next ep when he tries to be better and offer himself as a safe space, something he wouldn't have thought to do without crystal's guidance. when they actually work together, its incredible. crystal literally fights her own personal demon to get back to the boys. edwin is trusting her enough to openly admit that he has no idea how a vhs works and trusts her to put in the work to save his person. when she's in danger, he pulls her out because he cares and she's given him reason to. she doesn't question when she comes out from her own head and edwin immediately asks for help, something he almost never does. when she talks about how she's a bad person, edwin immediately tells her that she isn't. he wastes no time in assuring her that she couldn't be anything but the person she is now. she also points out the moment charles' mask goes right back up and offers a lot of insight to edwin. because edwin hasn't really had a friend before charles and charles was already doing this when they met. he had no reason to think that it wasn't a normal thing. but crystal points it out and he notices, he listens and he learns.

ep4: this is another one i dont particularly remember much of these two from. the ep starts with edwin asking if charles wanted to talk about his father, something he never would have done without crystal's guidance. when edwin tells crystal and charles to go off together, she asks him if he's ok, which in the moment, is said in a somewhat joking tone. but once he's gone, she asks charles about it because she's concerned about him and she knows him well enough to know something's wrong. when she's angry that the washer woman didn't give her an answer, he apologizes genuinely because he does want the best for her.

ep5: this ep starts off with a lot of emotional maturity from crystal. she admits that she isn't in the right space to start a relationship and i'll be honest, i hadn't seen that from a show before. made me love her even more. one of my favorite moments of the show is them haunting twitchy ritchy. when he makes deprecating and homophobic 'jokes', crystal is quick to shut him down. and i would argue that she knew edwin was gay, i'd argue for hours. she notices his distress and immediately shuts the dude down, and hard. in return, when ritchy tries to be intimidating, edwin is the first to step in. he extinguishes the flame with a satisfied lil smirk and crystal didn't even have to look over to know that he would step in. and we don't really see it, but i'd bet watching edwin do childish little haunting things probably made her smile. it's a scene i think about all the time. when edwin shoos them away from the summoning and charles questions his choice, crystal sticks up for the decision. its small and unintentional, but there is an aspect where she admits that he's right. something she wouldn't do if she didn't like him and respect him. and when edwin realizes that marin killed the jocks, he's rushing out behind charles. hell it looks like he's pushing him forward to get them downstairs. crystal emphasizes at the end that she sympathizes with the boys, that it was a shitty thing to have in common that they were all victims. yet she offers her sympathy nonetheless. and when edwin says he's had enough emotion for the day, she isn't offended that he wasn't receptive or anything like that. she just smiles, knowing that he really can't handle a lot of emotions and she knows that he doesn't mean anything negative by it. she shows that she understands him and that she doesn't judge who he is.

ep6: when crystal loses her powers, she's scared to tell edwin. she says that she's afraid that he would consider her useless and toss her aside. but that stems from the fact that she really values him as a friend and is scared of being abandoned by the only people she has. and when edwin finds out, he is shocked sure but he's also concerned. he insists that he wouldn't have left her behind and she tells him that he would. its an emotional moment for her and i wouldn't write off that she's just really defensive in the moment. when she sees the boys in trouble, about to be dead-dead, that's when she regains her abilities because she cares about both of the boys and gods be damned if she's gonna let a witch tear them from her. and as the walk back, she leans into charles because she knows edwin doesn't like touch. but he's still right behind her, still nearby and offering silent support. and he goes the step of naming one of their plans after her, plain and simple. she shows her appreciation in the same slightly sarcastic tone they use with each other all the time.

ep7: so many thoughts. the second she finds out that edwin is in hell, she's already resolved to go get him. she has known the boy for a few weeks at most and she cares so much and is so selfless that she doesn't hesitate to volunteer to go to actual fucking hell. when she's told she can't? she tracks down her abusive demon ex who has literally tormented and plagued her mind nonstop. she walks right into his domain and demands he open her a door to hell. literally demands the person who has ruined her life to let her into hell to rescue her friend. when he refuses? she's ready to throw hands and doesn't hesitate to do so. and when the boys come back? yes, she does hug charles and not edwin, but she knows that isn't his thing. but when it cuts back to the teens after the night nurse speaks, you see her arm falling from edwin's. even though he hates hugs and she knows it, she still reached out and held his arm to show how happy she was that he was there, that he was safe. because even though he doesn't hug, she still needed to show him she was happy he was back. she talks about how she fought david and edwin expresses surprise and concern. her retort? 'it was the funniest thing. my friend got dragged to hell and i just had to try and help him.' she doesn't even think about hiding how much she cares and edwin's little smile just confirms how much it means to him.

ep8: when she's recovering her memories, edwin is there. he's watching over her with charles and that just hits something in me. he must have spent so long in the dollhouse exhausted, hoping someone would watch over him so he could be safe and rest. and when crystal is vulnerable, he's doing it. he watches over her as she calls her parents and the second she says that they didn't care, he is insisting that there must be some kind of explanation. every time she wakes up after eating the memory orbs, he rushing to her right beside charles. and i'd bet my bottom dollar he was stressed the whole time she was out. when crystal leaves, edwin does offer her a handshake. she jokes about how he's changed, how he's gotten friendlier, and he jokes back, even throwing in a reference to hell. it's a sweet little interaction and it shows their friendship and familiarity. esther takes the boys and she doesn't hesitate to work a way to get them back. she goes right to the cat king and argues that edwin is her friend and tck should help them because he has personal interest. she charges right into esther's house and already has a plan in place. she spends a minute on charles because she knows edwin's in danger and his screams are fucking unbearable. she offers herself as a distraction so niko can free edwin. when she's pinned against the wall, she scream-pleads for edwin to hold on and it is full of desperation, because she needs her friend to be okay. that scream haunts my mind because she is scared and she knows he is too, and she needs him to hold on and be okay. and when niko 'dies', they are huddled over her body and mourning together. in the end, edwin gives her a professional offer for her to have a permanent place with the agency. and this girl, so naturally full of love and affection, hugs him with a massive smile on her face. because she's been looking for people to belong with and she's found em and they want her around. and she's gonna do anything she can to hold onto them, come hell, demons or high water.

basically, crystal is beyond amazing and her sibling relationship with edwin is my favorite. if you don't like her, argue with the goddamn wall.

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Wednesday amazing fandom :) I realized last review forgot to mention with it being the 100th ep that I hit quite a milestone myself. It was my 100th review. Unreal and proud of myself for doing 100 of these. Now it's my 101st with this one. They’re hard work but enjoy doing them so much.

Love the responses these have gotten. So Thank you to everyone who's commented, liked or reblogged any of these 100 you are amazing. I appreciate you more than you'll ever know. This episode is adorable for so many reasons lots of good Chenford nuggets in here and lots of John/Bailey moments I can fast forward LOL Let us get started.

6x03 Trouble in Paradise

We start with some GLORIOUS domestic Chenford. I mean legit glorious. Tim with his early morning scratchy voice. Leaning against that door frame like the delicious sight he is. Also let’s not by-pass the scruff. It's littered all over that sexy jawline of his. Mmm. Take me now sir. Anyways....To top it off he’s in his jam jams I love this. He asks her if she slept at all? Lucy telling him she’ll sleep when she’s taken the exam and gotten detective.

Tim scoffing knowing she’s not sleeping then either LOL I mean he’s not wrong…He’s so damn supportive as he listens in as she explains what she’s prepared on. The way he just nods along and listens to her vent. Every woman’s dream Tim Bradford every woman's. Checking in to test the temperature of her neuroses today heh I love him for it. He just wants to love her through this so much. It makes my heart so happy.

Lucy explains how it’s the oral portion that’s keeping her up at night. It would be keeping me up too honestly. Especially with how subjective it is. Also like to note how unfair it is how friggin pretty Lucy looks in the morning. Wish I could look that good ha. Tim asking if she still thinks Primm is out to get her? Then explains her cookie debacle. How she brought him some homemade ones and he just tossed them. I mean that's pretty damn rude....What a schmuck.

I relate to Lucy’s anxiety so much. Because I am her when I am very stressed and anxious. I get hyper focused and can’t relax. Won’t let myself do anything till that’s done. Tim once again does his damndest to calm her, support her and reassure her it’ll be ok. The man deserves a gold star for how amazing he is eps 1-4 truly. He is 10/10 incredible for her. Her legit support system through out this whole thing.

The way he tries to take her highlighter cracks me up. Gently placing his hands over hers and pulls. She holds onto it for dear life though so he gives up. lol Tim tries a different tactic. He tells her she can over-prepare. Which is true. I’ve lived this life. BUT when you are this stressed/anxious that ain’t coming through. Her reply cracks me up. ‘No, that is an idea that lazy people created.’ LMAO This made me laugh so hard cause I would say something to this effect.

Tim does a Hail Mary of logic in this last portion. Telling her she’s gonna get in her head, how she just needs to trust herself and then let it go. His smile is so pure and sweet. Truly thinking he’s gotten through to his girl finally. The way she nods. Then Lucy instantly walks it back ‘ Yeah, I don’t think I can do that.’ I’m rolling. Oh Lucy I do get you girl. Least she’s honest with her man ahha

Tim knows when to tap out and does as such. With a frustrated groan he gets up. Knowing he’s not gonna break her study spell. Noting he’s gonna go take a shower then. Little does he know the prospect of him wet and naked is enough to break it. Lucy is surprised at his sudden departure. Asking if he means right now? He’s so over the convo just gives her a ‘Yeah.’ Wiping his hands of this situation for the moment.

Lucy lust's after him as he walks away from her. The thought of Tim being her break is far more enticing than a normal break. Mmm don’t blame you girl. I would be using that man for all kinds of stress relief if I was you... Lucy finally gets up and follows her man to the shower. For a much needed break. I love the continuity of their shower sex LOL It’s bloody fantastic and we’re all here for it. I saw a great post that said ‘If only 5x01 Tim could see himself now.’ He would lose his friggin mind.

Getting all the shower sex and shower time he wants with Lucy now. She seeks him out for it and vice versa. Gah so good. The writers sure know how to take care of us. Especially with moments like this. D wrote a fantastic fic about this moment. Highly encourage you to read it. Also saw a great tag for this as well. It was their head canon he did that on purpose to get her to unwind with him. Sold! LOL I love this fandom and how it thinks.

We get to see Tim back in T.O mode and it revs my engine everyone. hahaha It just does especially after not seeing it for awhile. Tim standing there looking criminally delicious in one of my fav poses. Arms crossed, biceps bulging, and forearms front and center. Hot damn he’s such a sight.

Celina is being reprimanded for her behavior at the wedding. Because honestly it was concerning to say the least. With Nolan out and Harper needing to get back to the detective squad Tim is taking over. Lucy catches his eye and he knows she’s up to something. I love his expression. He knows he needs to see what is going on. He barks orders at Celina to get war bags ready before he goes to check on his girl.

Lucy going to Smitty has to be one of the most hysterical things. Tim literally just told her to cool it for her sanity. What does she do? Go to friggin Smitty. I’m dying. Thinking it won’t get back to Tim. Your husband done found out already dear. ha I do love the tip Smitty gives her on how Primm loves dogs. Such a Melissa detail there. Appealing to the animal lover in her. Tim interrupts their impromptu study session. This scene is comedy gold. Always is with Smitty. Dude isn’t in the show a ton but when he is. Man delivers haha

Tim can’t believe she’s gone to Smitty to study of all people. It is hilarious how offended he is when Lucy says ‘Is he even really helping her?’ Like damn that's ice cold Lucy. Man was just giving you valuable intel lol Tim corralling his girlfriend into his shift for the day is everything. Once again kudos to our man for doing his best for her. Trying to get an obsessive perfectionist to chill is quite the battle to take on. Not only chill but focus on something eIse entirely isn't easy.

I would know I am her and I feel bad for my friends when I get like this. heh. Tim riding the line between BF and Sergeant in front of Smitty is fantastic. She’s like a toddler right now and he’s continuously trying to keep her from the outlets. The parameters he puts down for both Celina and her crack me up. Still got that T.O bark in him for her. The way his eyes follow her out. *dreamy sigh* That BF side coming back out there. Smitty's comment snaps him out of it though. Too funny.

S7. Imma need more of this trio right here. On and off work. It’s such a good one right off the bat. Celina rambling nervously while Lucy enjoys herself in the back. You know she loves watching him in T.O. mode. Just like the rest of us. We also get the delicious eargasm of him saying ‘Juarez’ with that that sexy inflection of his. If it seems like I’m extra feral this ep for him it's because I am LOL No point in fighting it. I am who I am.

Lucy brings up Aaron and Tim is instantly annoyed. That convo doesn't last more than 20 seconds. Tim pulls the car over immediately jolting them both. Telling them both to get out of the car. Ahh S1 Tim trying to make an appearance. Lucy isn’t phased in the least. Because no matter what she knows soft Tim. Also just had her way with him this morning. She ain’t scared ha Their amazing dynamic never ceases to amaze me. Lucy concedes and says they can just talk at lunch...

I do love them Co-T.O’ing Celina in this one. Perfect mixture of hug and smack really. They respond to a guy who claims to have ‘amnesia’ Tim isn’t buying it in the least cause well it's Tim. They make it to the hospital to interview this man. Tim could not be more over this man and his BS if he tried.

His face while this guy prattles on is priceless. Eric out here killing it once again with his facial expressions. Let’s not forget the ZERO amount of personal space per usual with them. Always delights me paired with the height difference? I’m a happy girl. They are once again the epitome of Grumpy x Sunshine here.

No one does it better than our ship. They reconvene in the hallway to discuss how they wanna proceed. They’re so deep into their chat they don’t realize Celina isn’t there. LMAO Her looking around for them after they’ve left is so funny. Giving me 5x17 flashbacks where they kept losing the kid. Except it's their rookie which isn't much better.

Tim yelling out ‘Boot!’ Mmm yes sir. Celina running over to meet up with Tim and Lucy. He continues his gruff T.O. act with her. Telling her he's about the hang a bell around her neck cause he keeps losing her. Oh Timothy. I adore how Lucy looks at Tim while he’s in this mode. Nothing but love eyes emanating from her. You are at work madam. Reign it in it. Actually don't I love it. I would say this portion is indicative of their future parenting styles. But we all know that man is gonna be a softie to their kid(s)

Because he didn’t get to have that. Lucy is going to have to be the one to lay down the law, funny enough. Especially if they have a girl. Lord help Tim. A mini Lucy running around? Man will be a goner... I do adore Lucy jumping in and saving Celina. Because she would’ve loved that herself as a rookie. Lucy’s T.O teaching style is very in line with me as a leader. As we were see in a future ep with her and Celina. She was denied praise so she wants to give what she was denied herself. Exactly how I am as a leader.

Wanted to give everything to my people that I never got. I adore this trio so much. Very mom/dad and their kid. I love Lucy giving Tim crap for not giving her a little praise. Also Lucy defending why she let Celina just go is the best. It is everything I explained above. Tim was of course is adverse to this idea. Trying to keep that hard T.O exterior going. Lucy not backing down asking 'Have I not softened you at all?' LOL You have my dear, but that is exclusive to you and only you. On and especially off work.

We get early morning domestic Chenford x2 in this ep. I’m eating it up. D and I have had this convo about how creepy John/Bailey are with waking up the other. How they’re just sitting like a weirdo till the other wakes up at the end of the bed. It’s not sweet or romantic in the least. It’s off putting lmao Whereas this moment it’s very sweet and intimate. The way Lucy rolls over and he is the first thing she sees. *happy sigh* What a way to wake up.

Look at how that man is looking at her. Tim is head over heels for her and not hiding it at all. It's exuding out of his delicious form as he gazes down at her. I’m not well guys. I’m not well. This is so precious I cannot. Just standing there. Getting ready for the day while he let's his girl catches some much needed extra z’s. Imma implode with how cute this all is. Getting ship drunk over here and loving it.

We can see how soft this man is for her. Right after she just asked the night before if she had softened him at all? Yes Lucy. Very much so. Tim is legit putty in your hands. Never seen this man as happy as he is with her. Second gif is all the proof I need. Also there is something so sexy about the way he rolls out his cuff. Why is this so attractive? I was already feral enough in this ep ahha Look at that man above. Getting ready in his delicious black shirt like he doesn't know he's an absolute snack.

We also get a nice shot of his chest as he buttons up. Hot damn this man is so beautiful. I’m a legit puddle of attraction *fans self*. After Lucy is done gazing at her beautiful BF she realizes she has slept in. Pops up in an instant panic. Tim replying calmly she needed it. Not phased at all by her reaction. What a good man taking care of her like this.

Seriously he was in the running for BF of the year at this point. Tim tells her to take the morning off. You know it's killing him to watch her drive herself into the ground like this. He had to do something. And if a little more sleep was what he could control then so be it. It’s what he was going to make sure happened.

I love how he asks her 'Don’t you feel better?' It's his soft tone that has me melting. Does me in. Lucy concedes immediately saying that she does. So thankful for this man. Thankful for how he takes care of her without even asking. I love them so much. Also there is nothing like sleeping in after lots of sleep debt piles up. Lucy was due for it and Tim made sure she cashed in.

I adore the way she thanks him for looking out for her like this. It’s very sweet and loving. Heart eyes galore. Now the big ass smile on Tim's face after she says that. *chef kiss* My god that man is so happy to have finally gotten a victory with her. That smile has me reeling basically saying 'You’re welcome, my love.’ He then continues to get ready for the day knowing his girl is happy and rested.

Unfortunately the happy morning bubble doesn’t last for long after this. Lucy gets a text saying her test is ASAP. Which beyond sucks and just another mind game from Primm. Because we all know he makes her wait till dead last. 20 minutes my ass you SOB. I hate it sfm how he makes her wait that long only to destroy her in her oral exam. *grumble*

Honestly makes my stomach turn watching her in that oral exam. I can’t stand to watch it but must for this review. I hate her having to defend her mistake from 6x01. That shouldn’t define what an exemplary career she’s had. To this point she’s been stellar and nothing short of extraordinary. Hurts my heart to watch this scene go down. Also angers me and makes me wanna meet Primm in a dark ally with no witnesses…. Grey looks upset af when he posts the exam rankings. When she reads her results. 17th….

Gah this scene absolutely gutted me the first time. That has not changed during this rewatch. The music paired with Melissa’s outstanding acting got me all in my feels. Holy hell it's like getting the wind knocked out of you watching her devastation. How she tells Grey she’s going to die on that list. Ugh. My heart. Getting punished for taking care of Tim when he needed her. Makes me so mad I wanna throat punch Primm. Grey isn’t much comfort but that is a Tim job. It’s a rough rough scene everyone. Hard to stomach.

When Nolan damn near gets everything handed to him. She has to fight and claw for everything. Then still gets this steaming pile of crap. I hate this for our girl I really do.I truly hope we get to have a hard look at where she goes in S7. This needs to be delved into and wrapped up all in one. Our girl needs a path and a purpose. I truly think T.O. Is the calling she never expected it. Be interesting to see what they do in the next season for her following this. T.O. or not. But if she's a T.O. Tim will be her equal and not her superior for when they get back together. But I'm getting ahead of myself lol

We get domestic Chenford part 3 and it’s the best part of all. So much to love about this scene it’s crazy. The soft Tim we all know and love is ever present in this scene. Also, his partner, supportive Tim, is crushing a performance in this segment as well. It’s beyond adorable from end to end. Just what we needed after that devastating scene before. It does our shipper hearts real good.

Lucy is pouring them some wine for their night in. Cause clearly they’re not going out. She wants to hide away with her man. I do not blame her one bit. Telling Tim she can’t believe she came in 17th… That it’s almost worse than coming in last. I would be feeling the same. Tapping into her childhood a bit and the failures she feels from there.

Not only that, but I’m sure the voice in the back of her head, that sounds like her mom, is voicing the same things. About her choosing this career and life. It’s a good thing Tim is there to quell and silence all those voices. He tells her there is no prize for coming in last. BUT there is one for coming in 17th. Haha Tim then reaches over and pulls out the award he got her.

Look at the smile on that goober. He couldn’t be prouder of himself if he tried. Lucy looks throughly confused until she realizes he’s altered the trophy to ‘17st’ LMFAO. I love this man so much. As does Lucy as she grabs the trophy from him. Realizing what he's done. So many reasons to love this moment.

Lucy stated in 3x03 how much she loves trophies. Tim remembered this and got her one. My damn heart. Not only that the man was so sure she would be #1 he bought it beforehand. Lucy Chen’s number supporter right there. Front and center people. Lucy’s smile is everything. Tim is beaming because she is. Look at him in that second gif. He is smiling ear to ear. All he wanted was to make his girl smile and laugh. Check and check. Well done sir.

Tim truly was so damn thoughtful and precious through out this scene. A+ boyfriend right here folks. A damn plus. Man is soft as butter for her. We all love it. Lucy’s energy has immediately changed thanks to the man next to her. Not only does her tune change she matches his mood. Throwing back a joke of her own. Saying how she gonna have to set her sights on a different future. Then mentions Metro to get a rise out of him.

His reaction is HILARIOUS. He wasn’t ready for the joke she sent his way. Completely unprepared with a good answer. Also the stress it would bring him if she actually did. They know they work well together. That is not the problem. It’s the immense and increased danger she would be in. That’s what would give him a legit heart attack everyday. Lucy Chen has once again broken this man's brain. Gotta be a record at this point heh.

Lucy could not be cuter when she tells him she’s kidding. Her whole body bouncing with laughter. That adorableness that only Melissa can conjure and convey. It’s beyond precious. Tim with his weak. ‘I …I knew that.’ Lucy basically following it up with an ‘Ok babe…’ Whatever you say my love. LOL Not believing him even a little bit. They are so cute and sweet I’m diabetic.

Lucy then looks back down at the trophy he got her. Asking him if he really thought she was going to come in first? That self doubt and lack of confidence creeping back in. She truly needs to know and hear it from him. Needs that reassurance he believes in her. Because just like Tim’s needs her opinion of him to be high. Lucy needs to know Tim believes in her. Tim doesn’t miss a beat with his reply.

The sweet smile going along with it. He’s loves her so much. Is so damn proud of her. It just flows out of him. Wasn’t a doubt in his mind she was capable of being #1. He’s seen her defy the odds so many times. Was front row to every victory and loss that’s shaped her as a cop. He’s watched her become this confident bad ass. Overcoming insane and traumatic things only to come out stronger. Knows she’s a strong test taker. To him was a no brainer she would crush this thing and then some.

Lucy hears all that in his tone and reply. Sadly she doesn't take this as a positive. But a failure on her part. She starts to fall back into her previous mood. Feeling like she let her most important person down. Those insecurities rushing back and she is beating herself up. It’s the way she stares down at first. Then locks eyes with him letting him know she’s sorry. Sorry she’s disappointed him. I saw someone made a 1x12 parallel to this line that kinda hurt my heart a bit. And once again it's something I can relate to cause I’m the same. He is just so damn supportive and cares so so much. That it comes off as high standards.

Ones that people feel like they're going to fail to achieve. When really it's just a great depth of caring and voicing what someone is capable of. Because he was denied that in his childhood he wants to make sure the people he loves know it. So they feel this need to live up to these standards he unintentionally sets. I can so relate because I was this way with my team. I was deeply caring and supportive but also voiced a lot what they were capable of. Because I too had been denied that in my childhood and with other leaders in my life. So when others would watch my team they would tell me that I had such high standards for my team.

They did not tell me this in a good way btw. Even though I produced a successful team that loved me it felt like a slight. Now while I had those standards it was always paired with deep caring and support. Just like Tim. He is just trying to build up those he loves and can come off as high standards people can't reach. Just a fascinatingly tragic thing the woman he falls in love with mistake it as high standards. When he's just trying to show how much he cares and supports them.

I stumbled across and felt it fit this moment. Because right now Lucy feels she has failed his high standards. Failed his idea of her being #1 (which we know she hasn't in his eyes.) That she's disappointed him so much so she can barely keep eye contact with him. The potential for miscommunication for this is immense. Like it was for him and Isabel. Luckily Tim kills this before it's an issue. So proud of him BTW. His growth still floors me.

Where in 1x12 Tim has no answer for Isabel saying his standards made her feel like a failure, here he has one for Lucy. He’s learned from his past and that’s a beautiful thing to behold. He’s learned to love better. To communicate better. Loving Lucy has made him want to be better in both of those aspects. He doesn't want to make the same mistakes with her as he did with Isabel. I said back in s2 his relationship with Rachel I loved. Not because I loved him with her. But because it helped heal him. Showed him he could do a relationship again. She got him back to that place where he could fall in love again.

Even Ashley as much as we didn’t like her got him thinking about marriage, serious relationships etc again. A place I’m sure he never thought he would go again. Also taught him what he didn’t want. Even though she was the one to end it you know he learned from it. He saw all the things he wanted out of life for his next relationship and then he saw those things with Lucy. All that to say is with that growth he's gained he immediately quells the anxiety and disappointment raging inside her. Doesn't let it fester.

Squashes the thought of her thinking he could ever think that with his sweet reply. I love how he shakes his head. Kinda like how he did back in 6x02 when she asked if he loved her. Like he can’t believe she would even think he would say or think that about her. So much is said in one sentence here. The way he leans closer to her as well. Makes sure she can read her his heart eyes as he expresses something so deeply true to him. That she could never disappoint him. *heart clutch*

Then we get the sweetest kiss to wrap this moment up. I love the way she smiles into the kiss and afterwards. Makes me squee to no end. Completed besotted with the man next to her. It’s screaming all over her body language how much she loves Tim. Their kisses always bring me such shippy joy. It's hard to put into words sometimes. But this one definitely gives me all the butterfly feels. The entire scene does really.

The scene ends with the cutest smile from Lucy. We talk a lot about Tim’s “Lucy smile.” The one he only brings out for her. Lucy has the same with her “Tim smile.” Ain’t no one making her smile and legit light up the way Tim does. Look at the way she looks at that man in the final gifs. With sheer reverence and awe that she gets to call him hers. Tim is uber cute reveling in how good a job he did haha

Lucy easily gives into his comments. Letting him pad his ego this time. He’s more than earned it. Agreeing he did and she loves him so much for it. Adores this man by her side. He is keeping her afloat like no one else could. He never once gave up in supporting her through this nightmare. How even at her lowest Tim managed to take care of her and make her laugh and smile. She is forever grateful and it’s written all over those last two gifs. Cuteness they name is Chenford.

The song in this scene is called “healing rock.” Seems fitting. Tim was definitely healing her in this final scene. Also just a soothing song that played in the background. Perfect way to end it. That’s all she wrote for this one. Damn good episode for them. I was on cloud 9 after this one. Hard not to be. Thank you amazing readers for like, comment and reblog these. You are the real MVP's. see you all in 6x04 :)

~~~

Side note -Non Chenford

More I see Lucy in T.O roles more I think I want her to be one. She would be an excellent teacher. Far better than friggin Nolan.

I love Grey Checking in with Tim about Lucy. Tim telling him he will be glad when this is done. Killing him how she is has been a mess during all this. My heart.

John and Bailey had to have had the most unromantic boring ass honeymoon ever. I watched it the first time but I fast forwarded all that this time. *snooze*

[befuddledcinnamonroll]

Jack and Joker - final thoughts

Since the takes in the tags are... quite all over, I just want to be open about how I approach watching QLs.

1. I'm here to have fun. Real life sucks immensely right now, and QLs are my happy place.

2. I'm very aware that I am a white woman from a Western country and that I am a guest in East Asian spaces. I have internalized biases because of my background, and I believe it's my responsibility to learn and grow and figure out how to be open to other cultures & experiences without jumping to assumption.

3. I love metaphorical storytelling. I love when people take risks and try something new. I don't care if there are some logical inconsistencies or issues with budget. I am here for how it makes me feel, and what I can learn from it.

So, all that being said...

I had such a good time with this show!

I'm still processing a lot about it, and I know I will be thinking about it for some time to come. But they did so much that I appreciated. I don't have the time to go into great detail, but in very broad terms - what I loved:

Of course Yin and War. What an incredible job they did. I know this was a really challenging project for them, and they took a lot of personal risks. They are so conscientious about harmful tropes and stereotypes, and deliberate in working to break those down. I'm so proud of them, and excited to see where they go from here.

The characters. From the leads to the sides, I just adored so many of them. Jack and Joke were both such imperfect and flawed characters, but that made them so interesting to me. I loved our little troupe of idiots. I loved Toi Ting. I loved Grandma. Everyone was so vividly portrayed. Hope and Save's devotion to one another. Tattoo and Arun gradually becoming boyfriends without either one noticing. The fanfics are gonna be fire.

The storytelling. Yin and War could have easily made a fluffy romance, and people would have eaten it all up (and probably complained a lot less, lol). But it wouldn't have really said anything. They wanted to do something more complex than that. They had a lot to say about being trapped in a political & economic system that is not of our choosing and that we have no control over, and what it means for individuals to try and live out their ethics and values while knowing the system is not going anywhere. Save being the new Boss isn't a perfect solution, it's not a "yay, it's all better now!". It's a "well at least this position that will be filled one way or another is filled by a slightly less shitty person now, so maybe we can live our lives without being beaten up this year". And the Four Horsemen don't go anywhere, because systems of power are fixed. We remain beholden to them. But we can still try to carve out our little pieces of a place to hold true to ourselves and those we love.

Overall, this show made me laugh, made me cry, and made me literally applaud alone in my apartment. It wasn't perfect, there were flaws, but damn was it an incredible experience.

[riddle-me-ri]

Riri!! You rock! Everything you write is so amazing and I can't believe we're all so lucky that you share your creations with us all!!! If you're still taking valentines requests can I ask for BTAS Penguin character or reader get jealous? All your Penguin stories are all fantastic but your BTAS ones are always my absolute faves!!

a/n: awwww omg you're too sweet thank you so much!! That means a lot and I appreciate you!! I am still taking vday requests until this Sunday! I have already written about BTAS Pengy getting jealous (here) of Riddler so I think it would be interesting to flip the tables for this one! I know that in BTAS it's not spoken about him owning the Iceberg Lounge until TNBA when his ownership plays a more pivotal role so I'm just going to combine the two its still BTAS Penguin but with TNBA status kind of lol

Content Warning: jealous thoughts

Word Count: 508

Reader Gets Jealous Over BTAS Penguin

Oswald Cobblepot is an ideal partner.

He complimented you, supported you, validated you…treated you like the only person in the world that mattered to him.

These sentiments you returned back to him tenfold, of course.

Jealousy was something that mostly occurred on his part.

Oswald's insecurities often got the better of him, not that he didn't trust you, he just knew that there were more conventionally attractive partners out there with the potential to whisk you away…and he couldn't say he'd blame you if you let them.

You always reassured him and proved his insecurities wrong by remaining to be by his side for years to come.

However, tonight, the shoe was on the other foot.

You took a drink from your cup to hide the grimace on your face as you saw an undeniably attractive woman all over Oswald.

Knots of rage began tightening in your stomach, waiting to implode. The nerve, the audacity of some people–

The conflicting emotion between wanting to tell this lady to back off versus wanting to pull her back by her hair away from him…both of which were not a good idea because ultimately you didn't want to embarrass Oswald in his club.

You sighed as you tried to get a handle on your emotions and think logically about what to do.

“Ah, there you are, my dove!”

Maybe you didn't have to think of anything, because before you knew it the love of your life was making his way towards you.

For once, your heart beat steadily, and your breathing was even. “Ozzie!”

You got up from the barstool and excitedly walked over to him.

“You look gorgeous! I'm glad to see you wearing the attire I bought you, I presume it fits well?”

He looked up at you as he took your hands in his own.

“Yes, I love it! And you look incredibly handsome as always, Ozzie!” You leaned down and nuzzled your nose against his signature long and pointed one.

As you two conversed lovingly, you couldn't help but feel the pressure of someone's eyes on you.

Your eyes darted over Oswald's shoulder to see the very woman that caused your ire earlier.

It seems the shoe is on the other foot…

Your smile grew as you brought your attention back to Oswald, who still looked up at you with devoting eyes.

You brought your hand to cup the side of Oswald's face before pulling him up a little to bring his face closer to yours–to have his lips meet yours.

You grinned as you couldn't help but tone in on the sound of heels stomping on the ground over the classical live piano music.

Oswald was none the wiser as his cheeks dusted red, and he cheerfully took your hand in his once more.

“Come, darling! The night is still young!”

You tightened your grip on Oswald’s hand as your speculation was confirmed that the woman did indeed leave in a huff.

“Indeed, lead the way, Ozzie!”

[aceontheline]

Rambles About Amy (Hazbin OC)

Whether someone wants this or not, I'm gonna talk about her anyway because I LOOVVEE her!

(T//W for Mentions of Abuse, Her Death, Eating Problems)

First up is about her human self!

Amy has Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), and it was prevalent very much in her childhood. Certain sensory issues caused her to avoid certain foods (Bananas, Cauliflower, Beans, Jello, etc) all together, or from wearing certain items of clothing because she hated the texture (i.e: Rain/Winter jackets, jeans, gloves *unless fingerless*, bras *would just wear compression tanks*, etc). Her ASD carried over a lot later on in life as well, but mostly with the sensory issues and being overstimulated more easily than her peers.

Amy was raised mostly by her 3 older brothers: Mark, Colin and Stephen. She was a fairly active kid and would go outside a lot. It was her way of escaping her grim reality of being severely neglected (and at times, abused) by her parents. The boys would try to reign her in with video games they thought she'd like... Turns out, it just made her hyper competitive.

If you know ANYTHING about "Golden Girls," you'll know that Sophia and Dorothy were perhaps the most sarcastic and hilarious women in the show (at least in my opinion). Amy is almost exactly like Dorothy. Very sassy and can come up with jokes "off the cuff." She used to watch the show when everyone else was asleep or not around, and said she wanted to be exactly like Dorothy: A strong, funny, and independent woman.

Amy also has a gap in her front teeth in this form. She doesn't smile often because of this, or will do so with a closed mouth. Along with her more high pitched voice, which she never grew out of, it's something she never got over.

Now, for Sinner Amy!

I have yet to draw her with it, but there is an "X" scar over Amy's chest and forehead. Both were entry points for the bullets she used to end her own life.

Amy doesn't necessarily believe in the hotel's goal, as she's of the belief that: "In order for people to change, they have to WANT to change. Everyone's in Hell and staying because they know they've done wrong and don't have a good shot at redemption." Although, she herself is making changes substantially. She's a lot nicer and more approachable than she was on Earth. Though, around those she doesn't know (or treat her rudely), she'll still have that "Dorothy" energy.

Amy's primary sins are of Lust and Greed. When she was alive, she used to sleep around with men & women that gave her money and gifts. Though now, she can't imagine sleeping with anyone else other than Husk. The thought makes her feel incredibly guilty & even gross.

Her insecurities about her body carried over, even in death. She insists she can go on in a day with only snacks or light meals because it's "all she needs," but Husk is currently working with her to reverse this behavior.

Amy loovveess oversized clothes of any kind. Her logic? She "likes to feel small," and it makes her happy. Sometimes, Husk sees her wearing clothes that he may still have (other than his pants). He finds it absolutely adorable, but won't say that out loud. Then again, she'll do things that she knows he finds adorable just to get his attention.

[archivedblog16]

The day I learned that someone made a fankid for VoxVal was the day I realized that Mpreg was essentially apart of the fandom. I don't think Mpreg is actually a good thing, I think it borderline fetishizes pregnancy but for males, because most of the Mpreg I've seen the males are basically Bio-Males, it would be different if (I am one) it's a TransMan, so yeah.

The amount of Mpreg Art of Lucifer is concerning. I only make exceptions if it's Transformers or DBZ (Believe me, Namekians lay eggs from throwing them up.)

I tried to say, "Oh they are angels and demons biology wouldn't matter to them." But the more I think about it, the more it doesn't add up, Viv isn't going for Fantasy, she's going for Realism and Adult Animation Logic, /HHG/ on 4Chan is already fetishizing the pregnancy of Millie and I hate how (as someone who uses pregnancy to cope with the fact I won't be a mother myself due to gender dysphoria and the fact I can't even be a good person or mother in general.) and seeing this happen?

No, Viv doesn't know how to write pregnancy or anything because it's fanfiction pregnancy, is she gonna do a timeskip or what? Because pregnancy or writing it is more than "Morning Sickness" and mood swings its a journey a lot of people can or can't have and if Viv cannot write women at least get another woman to write their own experience with not wanting a pregnancy because a baby on board means that it wouldn't bode well, especially Stolas who recently lost his daughter due to his own selfish desires.

I do not have high hopes for that child at all, I think the Octavia cutting off and Millie Pregnancy reveal was too close and coincidental, if Viv uses this as a bi-proxy to have Millie give Stolas and Blitz the baby I'm gonna literally shave my hair off.

Sorry for the rant, Aunt Flo came to visit and Pregnancy as a topic makes me incredibly sensitive esp when I was 5 I always wanted to be a mother, I did research and made storylines surrounding unexpected pregnancy and unplanned and all what Millie goes through and I have NO hopes Viv would handle it.

😂 Yeah mpreg (male pregnancy) and fankids are pretty common in different fandoms. You will definitely come across it at least once whether on accident or curiosity. For Millie’s pregnancy only time will tell and Vivziepop now has two new writers so anything can really happen.

Millie could keep the baby, abort it, give it to her family to take care of temporarily or give it temporarily to Blitzø and Stolas so they live their cringey fantasy, put the kid in an adoption center, and if she does keep the kid someone like Crimson could kidnap the baby. If Millie does keep the baby, Vivziepop will definitely make merch off it.

[doberbutts]

i think what is making me speechless about people interacting with that post is the absolute obtuse way they steer around “poc men” where they state that men are oppressors but poc are minorities and dont benefit from male privilege and then run miles trying to avoid the most straight question of “then what do you consider a poc man then? what of this experience i have had?” to which they are running with the idea of a cishet white patriarchal idea of men with privilege and oppressor status- and refusing to analyze their own inherent racism when they state all men are oppressors and therefore all men should be quiet and listen to women- but of course poc is an oppressed class and dont need to be quiet and that no one would ever say that- but also men need to understand all women are afraid of men. they are refusing to interact with this flat out not controversial statement that the popfeminist/radfem-lite is not intersectional and erases peoples lived experiences, all because they dont want to do the work to unlearn their discomfort and know that they themselves are not immune to “being a bad feminist”. i myself as a mixed poc tmasc have a kneejerk discomfort to cis women due to my exwife leveraging radfem logic against me as a way to subdue and erase my voice and lived experiences because once i started to identify as masculine i was choosing the side of the patriarchy- but i acknowledge that my discomfort is from my own past experience and that i cant treat every woman like they would treat me the same that she did; so all of these users adding to your post, running themselves around in circles to state that they are in the right to continue to stereotype all and every man (but no not every man- poc are not a Man because they arent racist of course) as privilaged and predatory and therefore its the mans responsibility to bend over backwards for their or other people they are speaking on behalf ofs (lets go out to their fields to find the strawman out there) comfort; because feminism means men need to make themselves smaller- like PLEASE!!! these people need to evaluate their own biases and stop showing their entire behinds on a post that they want to interact with but also not be corrected on and please please please pick up 1 (one) bell hooks book (which they wont because they dont read anything, they just have other people tell them what the right things to say are)

sorry about my ramble- it might not be cohesive, but i am absolutely aghast and agog at the gall these people have to be telling you that you are incorrect and that they are simply stating the “accepted truth” of “feminist spaces” while they most certainly are not and are being incredibly dense about plain facts

Yeah I hit my breaking point the other day when I said the word evil. I am not proud of that moment but also I don't know how else to describe what I feel every time this happens. How can anyone look at the body count and say that's acceptable collateral damage as long as their feelings of safety (real safety be damned) are guaranteed.