#a lot of these are based on game experience

[sirobvious]

hey @self-loving-vampire, based on this response, if you're into TTRPGs, you might really enjoy the one I wrote called Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy. A large portion of it is dedicated to the point that people who are a "drain" on society, like vampires, are still inherently valuable and deserving of life, based on my own experiences as a disabled person. You're basically summing up a lot of its themes right here.

And to reiterate to, like, everyone on this post, the whole "no non-harmful way to exist as a vampire" and the "unsolvable ethical dilemma" is, like, the point in the sense of, like, fiction. That's where the story comes from, the conflict and the drama that makes it interesting and about something, like being about disability, and many people's inability to exist without taking from others. This post is about how you shouldn't try to remove conflict from your story about vampires, because in doing so, you're always going to be glossing over one thing or another. Or it'll just be boring.

Here's a link to the game itself, and some other posts discussing its themes regarding monsters and disability if you're interested!

I know that’s kind of the go-to thing to show that a vampire character is “one of the good ones” or whatever but it actually seems a little bit more fucked up for a vampire to steal blood from a blood bank than for a vampire to attack people for blood, at least as long as it’s not the kind of vampire where a bite is instantly lethal like it never stops bleeding. 

People can recover from losing some blood but blood bank blood is constantly in short supply and is reserved for people who imminently need blood transfusion of a specific blood type or else they die.

[scudevils]

it’s beginning to look a lot like christmas — QH43

pairing: quinn hughes x fem!reader

warnings: fluff, bit of a rushed ending sorry, not proofread!!

inspired by: “it’s beginning to look a lot like christmas” by bing crosby [1.2k]

a/n: a quick one for boyfriend quinn appreciation

it was a rare quiet day in the middle of the season, quinn who was usually surrounded by the hustle and bustle of hockey life, found himself sitting beside you in the warm glow of holiday lights, the smells of cinnamon, nutmeg, and ginger filled the air, mixing with the sound of soft christmas music playing in the background.

you'd been to the store earlier in the week, a gingerbread house kit lay spread out on the kitchen table to welcome him home from the road game in carolina, your niece's expectant eyes looking up at the pair of you as the pieces game in their own neatly placed bags, you and quinn shared a look of hesitation.

"this is way more complicated than it looks," was the first thing he said, peering at the instruction booklet with a playful grimace, eyeing up your niece's miniature house which was going a lot better than yours. his hair, slightly messier than usual, hinted at the fact that he had been running his hands through it in frustration, dark strands falling in front of his face. you laughed softly, enjoying the moment of calm in an otherwise busy season, and even off the ice he was just as competitive. (even if it was against a 9 year old)

"i thought you were good at building things," you teased, taking a sip from one of the hot chocolate you'd made for the three of you, choosing to take a step back from the building business as it was getting a big heated. "you're an athlete, you know... strategy, precision, focus?" you gave him a wink.

quinn grinned, his eyes lighting up in that characteristic way that always made you smile. "i play hockey, not architect. but i'm willing to try. you're the one with all the crafting experience, right?"

you raised an eyebrow at his suggestion, the most building you'd ever done in your life was a science fair project when you were 11, and even then your dad had built the majority of it. "crafting experience? skylar's got more crafting experience with me, she still does homework."

"alright, alright, I'll admit it," he said, grinning, the little girl beside them too busy already decorating her gingerbread house to care about what you had been saying. "maybe I need your help after all."

he reached for the frosting bag with a dramatic sigh, and you couldn't help but laugh as skylar's first order of business was to take the icing out of his hands. "read the instructions first," she said, flipping the booklet open and starting to explain the steps.

quinn looked at the pieces in front of him, tempted to give up and just eat the gingerbread, but that wasn't his nature, squinting like he was trying to figure out the lines on a hockey rink for the first time again. "wait, do you put the roof on first, or the walls?"

"okay, we need to build the base first. that's the most important part," you said, guiding him through it, looking to skylar for approval and she nodded, adding sweets onto her own now. "if the walls don't stay up, it's game over."

with a bit of teamwork, and an insane amount of luck that neither of you bumped into the table, you two managed to assemble the walls, and quinn was about to put the roof on before an idea struck him.

"so, are we going for traditional?" he asked, his tone suggesting he had something else in mind as he eyed the candy decorations, almost as if he was a real interior designer planning the layout for their house. "or... are we going for something a little more creative? like... a hockey rink gingerbread house?"

you raised an eyebrow at the suggestion, of course he would say that, you loved the man but sometimes you swore hockey was the only thing on his mind. "hockey rink? you've got to be kidding. i’m surprised you aren’t dying to get away from your job."

but quinn was already pointing out ideas, his mind running with possibilities, the coloured icing they could use to represent the teams, the different positions they should put in. "what if we add little gingerbread players with tiny sticks? and like, a frosting rink with icing lines?" he was grinning now, clearly enjoying the process way more than he'd let on, enjoying the design park much more than he had the building part.

"you're impossible," you spoke through a laugh, his enthusiasm something you loved about him and couldn't help but let you get in the spirit too.

together, you piped out a frosting rink on the base of the house decorated little gingerbread men with icing and tiny candies, making them into the most chaotic-looking hockey players you'd ever seen, some with more lopsided faces than the others. quinn insisted on adding mini pucks made of chocolate chips.

skylar had also finished her house, adding the final touches the one you and quinn had made too, her a candyland inspired design with sweets lining the road and covering the house.

as the arena started to take shape, you felt a warmth that wasn't just from the hot chocolate on the counter. it was from the way his eyes lit up with every silly detail he added, down to the numbers on the jerseys that his teammates wore.

by the time you were both done, the gingerbread house hockey arena—although a little uneven and very unconventional—was something to be proud of. it was uniquely yours, and in that moment, it was perfect. beside it sat the little actual gingerbread house your niece has made, edible glitter covering the icing and pieces of sweets missing from where she'd eaten them.

quinn stepped back, inspecting your creation with an exaggerated squint. "i think we nailed it," he said, a satisfied smile spreading across his face.

you leaned back in your chair, your head falling to rest his shoulder, admiring the gingerbread arena too. "honestly, it might be a little off-center..." noticing how the roof sloped down on one side while the other held up, "but it sure can't be called basic."

quinn chuckled, sitting next to you. "i think that's what matters most."

[bunnwich]

HELLO! Do you have a summary of how you portray Leona's personality in your stories? I'm a big fan of your Leona and Yuu stories and I've read them multiple times www /gen I always feel like you just nail how he would act and say things and you inspire me to work on my own fics and get better at writing scenarios with him. Than you in advance ily🙏 🦉anon

How I Portray Leona in General and in Romance

HI ANON! So I've gotten this question a few times and someone in my discord asked me basically the same thing so I'll share with you what I wrote a few months ago about Leona and the general way I write him. (it's quite funny bc a lot of these things come up in Chapter 7 when we see his dream. I AM CURSED WITH APOLLOS'S GIFT OF PROPHECY WITH THIS MAN ISTG)

I hope this is helpful?? I would like to point out that the way I write Leona is fully based on my biases and life experiences. And that a big part of fandom is projecting what you wanna see in characters while still making them feel like the same character we know in canon, yk? Good luck with your fic writing! And thank you!! mwah mwah.💚 --

So Leona takes himself as a direct person, BUT he hides A LOT. He purposely misdirects people to get a reaction out of them. (Ex: pretending to be incompetent to anger someone) or he's playing with them. HE LOVES GAMES. Everyone is a chess piece, he has to feel in control bc that’s all he has ever had over everyone else; his wits. He’s a dickhead. He will say offensive shit to scare people off.

It’s a test to see who sticks around. He has no reservations when it comes to this. You take him as he is. And despite how some people write him he’s kinda silly? Like dad jokes. Why does he joke so much about eating people, who knows? (He says shit like Namby-pamby ffs) Why are you a 40y/o in a 20 y/o body?

I HC he purposely talks casually and gruff to distance himself from his upbringing. (I like to mix proper language and slang with him bc it feels right? Also lots of animal puns, and nicknames. HE'S CORNY AF)

In general, I don't think Leona is an entirely romantic person in canon, however in my timeline, I do HC that he, like Scar has this “want vs need problem” with connection to others. He thinks it's just praise he wants (or to be king) BUT he NEEDS TLC. What was Scar MOST jealous of at the end of the day?? Mufasa’s connections, a ✨queen✨, a family! BEING KING DID NOT MAKE SCAR HAPPY!! He needs to be needed and in Chapter 2 novella, he admits he HAS to numb himself to not care. I feel like this is something he constantly battles with. Yeah, he's lazy but it's partly bc he’s tired. He’s burnt out.

On the surface, he projects 100% nonchalance. He wants you to think everything he says is just "off the cuff", but it's not. He plans everything!!! He’s a mentor, big bro, caretaker. He is not the best at comforting words but he enjoys being a leader bc people appreciate him and look up to him. Something he never got at home.

Leona and ✨Romance✨

He fools himself into thinking he has the upper hand at first and keeps his distance keeping an eye on the object of his affection. Why would you catch his eye? Well, his greatest strength is picking up on OTHER STRENGTHS. Chessmaster. He is a mentorrrr and caretaker lowkey, he wants others to NEED him and rely on him. HE WANTS YOU TO NEED HIM.

At first, he would place himself in your path, trying to be helpful in a very tsundere type way. But he would still be causal and keep ruffling your feathers to gauge how you feel for him. He guards his heart pretty heavily. And more and more he is slowly collecting info about you he would find more ways for these meetings to happen until he realizes: "Oh shit, I’ve caught feelings." This one is the winner. He’s the king of nonchalance but also...he’s a very overly sensitive person. No doubt he’s freaking out a little, he doesn't wanna screw this up. But, he’d never show it.

I do think he wants to be challenged and given some pushback (insert manga panel about "something being harder to get and therefore is better"), He wants to WORK for it, to prove himself to you that you SHOULD choose him. He wants to impress you. It makes him feel alive. A person who keeps him on his toes.

And once this ”game” of cat and mouse starts to happen. He might start to let his guard down if you are shown you can be trusted with his VERY VERY delicate feelings, that you DO accept his flaws, treat him differently than all others, and see past his gruff demeanor. It is a test of sorts. He is testing that you can “handle” him. MORE GAMES.

He’d let you set the pace though. He won't be the first to give in. To kiss you or confess first. But he would fall first HARD. He’s not been given much one-on-one attention in his life so he would crave that time with you. Physical touch is a big one, but he would not be pushy. He'd tease your boundaries and become addicted to your time together.

But yeah, this push and pull goes on for a while, all the while he’s gauging how you react to this. Memorizing it all.

He’s def one of those texters who erases their sentence like 5 times when they are nervous bc he is cookin' up the RIGHT response to endear you. (Not in a sappy way of course more in a: “I know you miss me, mouse.” snarky sorta way.) Though he can be self-deprecating on bad days. He’ll act confident, though soften up behind closed doors.

I think once he realizes that you have picked up on his simpery and there's no going back...all bets are off. He doubles down, no longer ashamed of hiding it. (Assuming at this point the person has reciprocated these feelings too!) He wants to be yours and he’s not subtle. Someone to be by his side.

Then you get the REAL simp Leona, who lowkey mumbles the sappiest shit to you in his native language when he holds you, (bc he’s still embarrassed to be vulnerable, though this will fade over time) He’ll be your biggest supporter, and wants you around him as much as you can be.

This just keeps going until you're married. Congrats you now have a lion to take care of forever.🦁 Hope this helps!✨

[sflow-er]

Henry and Simon’s dynamic over the three seasons

For YR Faves Fest 2024 organised by @youngroyals-events Prompts: 2. Favourite teen side character (+ 7. Favourite not-quite friendship)

In one of my replies to the recent side character ask game, I briefly mentioned being partial to the dynamic between these two. So for this Faves Fest, I decided to elaborate with an analysis post (featuring screenshots of variable quality)!

I want to preface this with a brief acknowledgment of Henry’s privilege and classism. It is not my intention to diminish them. I do, however, feel that it’s a bit apples-to-oranges to compare them to Simon’s views (citrus pun intended). 🍊 is politically active and has put in the effort to form his own beliefs, while 🍏 shows us time and again that he is ignorant of the world outside the elite bubble and not inclined towards deep reflection. He is largely a product of his upbringing and the (liberal conservative) values imparted by his parents.

While Henry doesn’t grow enough to change his core views and values in the canon timeline, he does change his views on Simon. This isn’t enough progress for them to become actual friends before we leave off (I doubt Simon could be friends with someone who only exempts him), but I would still argue that they end the show on amicable terms.

And yes, I mean that in a mutual sense, even if Simon doesn’t soften towards Henry quite as much as Henry softens towards him!

So, let’s dive in!

Dialogue taken from the English CC and [abbreviated or corrected].

1.01: the tax debate

Henry: “Take my dad’s estate, for example. They’re struggling to make ends meet because of the high taxes.” [Simon chuckles and explains his views] Simon: “Like your dad. [Do you know how much he gets in EU subsidies every year]”? Henry: “And what the fuck does your dad do?”

Like most viewers, I find it a lot easier to relate to Simon’s views than Henry’s here – but I do think Henry often gets judged quite harshly for insulting Simon at the end. His comment does not come out of nowhere (cf. Stella’s unprompted dirty look at Simon and Sara when she talks about welfare scamming).

Henry only knows that his father has said their estate is struggling, so of course he won’t take kindly to Simon suggesting that they are actually getting undeserved subsidies instead. It’s also important to note that this estate isn’t just any old farm. It was granted to one of his ancestors as a reward for their services to the Crown, which makes it a core part of his family history. As we learn in 1.04, Henry is a Society boy and very proud of his noble ancestry, and Simon’s comment likely feels like an insult to his entire family. So although his retort is unquestionably rude, it is understandable that he lashes out.

Also, Henry has no way of knowing that Micke is a deadbeat. He is just applying a common stereotype (and potentially making assumptions based on the views Simon just expressed on welfare).

1.02: parallel but separate experiences

Early in this episode, we see Simon side-eye Henry and Walter for the paid tutoring. He decides to follow their example, but as we know he can’t actually afford it, we can already guess it won’t go as well for him as it did for them.

Next, we see Henry in the group as the rowing team ignores Simon at morning training. The camera also pans to him and Walter when August gives that bizarre speech about Simon’s class journey.

These moments highlight how different life at Hillerska (and beyond) looks for Henry and Simon. They are technically coexisting and even doing the same things, but their experiences are nothing alike.

However, there is also some potential for development here. August’s words about rowing bringing people together (and also about the class journey) should absolutely be taken with a heap of salt, but as we no longer see any open animosity between Henry and Simon, we can still wonder if rowing played a part.

Being on the same sports team is an entirely new frame of reference for these guys. They are no longer just the sosse and aristocrat who have been going to school together since pre-canon and clashing over their views; they are crewmates. They may be able to ignore each other for most of the time, but they may also have to do some team activities or even cooperate on occasion. At the very least, they will be around each other several extra times a week from late September/early October to Christmas break. This could definitely help to put them on more neutral ground.

1.05: Henry pays attention to Wilmon

In this episode, Henry learns more about Wilmon than the average Hillerska student knows. He is present when August tells the Society that Wille and Simon “hang out”, and also when Wille changes the plan from Simon to Alexander.

What’s more, he actually looks fairly thoughtful leaving that last meeting. We don’t know if it’s just shock over Wille’s ruthlessness, if he’s thinking about the plan to set up Alexander, or if there’s something else on his mind.

Now, this may veer into overinterpretation, but for the sake of thoroughness, let’s also include the blink and you’ll miss it moment before the Lucia procession where Henry notices Wilmon texting each other. In this cropped screenshot, you can see him looking at Simon, who has just put his phone down and is looking over at Wille.

1.06: Henry shows restraint

As we know, Henry is the only classmate who tries to treat Wille normally after the video, asking if he “saw the match yesterday” (he absolutely knows Wille didn’t). What is perhaps less noticeable is that he also shows more restraint than most of his schoolmates when the rumour mill gets going.

In this scene, Henry is pretty dispassionate reminding Walter that Wilmon sat next to each other at movie night and the two of them talked about it. There is a stark contrast to Walter, who absolutely pounces on that bit of gossip.

This one quick scene could just be a coincidence, but the same thing happens again when Wilmon return to school. Instead of engaging with the others who are all eagerly talking and whispering, Henry is already sitting at his desk minding his own business when Wille arrives. His only reaction to Simon showing up is this quick look, which is immediately followed by his show of kindness to Wille:

So the restraint does look very intentional.

As an aristocrat, monarchist and Society boy, Henry is loyal to Wille, who he now knows has been carrying on with Simon for a while already. He also knows how far Wille went to protect Simon, despite the fact that Simon had actually supplied the drugs, so he is going to side with Wille.

What’s more, Henry’s behaviour in these scenes also confirms that he isn’t hostile to Simon. We can surmise he probably doesn’t think Simon is the most appropriate choice of partner for the crown prince, but he is willing to take his cues from Wille. We never see him sneer, joke, or say anything nasty about Wilmon as a couple (cf. Stella and Fredrika joking about surrogacy).

We are also shown his reaction to Wille hugging Simon before we move on to season two.

2.02: the floorball hug and walk-by

The first interaction between Henry and Simon in S2 is them celebrating a floorball goal with a spontaneous hug, as seen at the top of this post. What a difference a term makes!

Now, I don’t think this moment is meant to signify that they are friends all of a sudden, and I do feel it comes slightly out of the blue. I suspect it was included as a nod to those who already liked Henry after S1, but I for one would’ve preferred to actually see their reconciliation.

But then again, if their initial antagonism was always class conflict rather than personal beef, maybe there was no need for apologies…? Maybe each of them just accepted that the other was going to be around and decided to try and get along (potentially aided by their shared rowing team history)? Henry is following Wille’s lead as we already saw – and as for Simon, I doubt he would be hugging Henry even in the heat of a game if he held a grudge. Whether we saw it or not, they have moved on.

In the same episode, we also have the locker room scene.

Contrary to popular opinion, I don’t believe Henry actually overhears the entire conversation, but he may have still heard something about them having to wait two years (as Simon did raise his voice for that). It’s also possible he comes out of this scene assuming that Wilmon still “hang out” in secret. In any case, he probably assumes that Wille wants to keep the whole thing quiet, as per the usual “policy” on queer relationships among the upper classes. In addition to his monarchist ways, he also seems to be casually friendly with Wille in S2 (keeps inviting him to do stuff, from coffee to pranking Sprucewood). So it makes a lot of sense for him to keep whatever he overhears or suspects to himself.

2.03, 2.05 and 2.06: book report scenes

While Henry must be a nightmare to have in the group, he and Simon are nice to each other in all the book report scenes. This is further proof that they are in a place where they can talk civilly and even work together.

They start the project before the rowing race and only present it the day before the gun range scene, which means they had these group sessions for at least a few weeks (the timeline is a bit wonky here).

2.04: Henry snitches on Wille and Felice

The lunch scene at the start of the episode starts with this bit of vicarious interaction, as Henry and Simon (and Wille too) are amused by the nonsense Walter is spouting about girls:

Also, Walter's monologue feels more comphet every time rewatch it, but I digress.

As this post is focused on Henry and Simon, I’m not going to dig too deep into Henry’s role in spreading the story about Wille and Felice. Suffice it to say that he did tell his canonically gossipy bestie Walter, and it was recently pointed out to me that he seems to have let something slip to someone else as well. In the common room, Walter goes “det var du som sa till…” [you were the one who said to…] just as the focus shifts to Wille and Nils, which suggests that Henry either purposely told someone or misspoke without realising it. The latter would explain why he seems genuinely appalled when Wille confronts him, but it’s not a hill I’d be willing to die on!

If Henry did spread the story on purpose, I assume it was because getting with Felice was considered a credit to Wille and also “fair game” to tell, unlike the relationship with Simon that Wille wanted to keep hidden.

Still, Henry and Simon are definitely on better terms in S2. Even though Henry inadvertently causes pain to Simon with his part in the Wille and Felice thing, they still keep working together on the book report without any animosity.

Insofar as Henry’s lacklustre effort can be called working. Simon is a bigger person than I am for not blowing up at him when he announces minutes before the presentation that he won’t be taking any questions.

3.01: background Henry

We start S3 off with this one-sided interaction where Henry reacts to Wilmon kissing with a mild smirk. No more waiting or secrets to keep.

3.02: double standards on the camping trip

It’s not entirely clear what Henry is thinking when he says the infamous line about gay couples being allowed to share but not straight ones. I think some people read it as him deliberately putting Wilmon on the spot, but personally, I doubt he even realises it’s going to make them uncomfortable. He’s just noticing the double standard and pointing it out to mess with the teacher.

While Simon is very clearly not pleased with Henry for the comment (glares at him while saying to Wille that people are going to think they plan to have sex), he does not seem to hold that against him. Because what we do see them doing soon?

Sitting next to each other by the fire, even though Henry could’ve easily sat with Walter and Simon with Wille:

Also, it seems Henry isn't new to camping, as he tells Wille that part of the fire is too hot to grill a sausage in.

The part where things get interesting is when Henry acts classist towards the Marieberg students.

Henry seems to be down with meeting Rosh and Ayub, who are there as Wille and Simon’s friends. But after Fredrika brings up New York, he agrees that the situation turned “stiff as fuck.” That stiffness was entirely Fredrika’s fault (I think she is at least semi-consciously trying to mark herself as the most compatible partner for Stella there), but Henry seems to feel it was more about Rosh and Ayub not fitting in.

He also sneers and makes nasty comments when the other Marieberg students get into an altercation with Malin, which elicits a frown from Simon.

And yet, Simon does not condemn Henry as strongly as he might have done in the past.

Importantly, Simon tells Wille “it wasn’t the right time for everyone to meet.” This indicates that he could’ve imagined them all getting along at a better time, and it’s pretty clear that also includes Henry. Furthermore, “you [meaning Wille and the others] don’t realise how privileged you are sometimes” is actually a pretty neutral way of putting it. Simon would have been entirely justified if he had said the others were classist pricks, but he blames their privilege and lack of understanding instead of their character.

All of this forms a backdrop for my interpretation of the scenes in the next episodes.

3.03: First of May

Simon: “You do know that you’re not off so you can party the day before, right?” Henry: “Uhh…what?” Simon: “It’s the First of May.” […] “The day of the labour movement?” Henry: “Okay, so what’s their style? How do they celebrate?” Simon, scoffing: “You don’t celebrate. You demonstrate.” [Henry and Walter share a chuckle]

This may be a controversial take, but I don’t think Henry is being particularly nasty to Simon here.

He actually looks and sounds quite sincere asking how the labour movement celebrates. When he and Walter laugh, it reads more as “there he goes again, our very own sosse, saying wacky things!” than the kind of disdain he expressed towards the Marieberg students in the last episode.

Simon also doesn’t take the laughter as an insult; he’s just stupefied by their ignorance. Also, note that he already scoffed at Henry’s question, marking the question as silly.

This exchange is immediately followed by Vincent attacking Simon for his beliefs, which feels like an intentional trick to create contrast between his and Walty’s treatment of Simon.

3.04: the lollipop

In this scene, Henry starts out asking quite nicely and seriously if Simon has another lollipop, as if they had that kind of rapport. Simon makes a face, but then he just shakes his head and nicely says no. It’s only then that Henry switches to offering money for the already half-eaten lollipop, to which Simon reacts with disbelief.

He does not, however, get snarky with Henry. He settles for exchanging a look with Wille as Walty go on to complain about the hunger strike. Only when Henry isn’t present anymore does he point out to Wille how ridiculous Henry was being.

In a sort of parallel to the lunch scene, Simon and Wille now share a chuckle at the wacky thing Henry said:

Feel free to disagree, but I actually wonder if this could be a common pattern between Simon and Henry. They have accepted that they aren’t going to see eye to eye on many things, but instead of getting into conflict, they just roll their eyes/laugh at how the other can seriously believe/say such things. Then they let the conversation move on to something else.

Which is a perfectly valid dynamic. They can acknowledge that their outlooks on life are wildly different without hating each other for it.

3:06: Henry includes Simon

Look, I dislike the library scene as much as the next person. The talk that Henry interrupts between Wilmon was so much more important than anything he could possibly say. It was just a moment of comic relief that didn’t add anything to the story.

Except… Now that we are tracing Henry and Simon’s “not-quite friendship” arc, this scene does give us a conclusion.

Henry: “Hi! Uh, what are you wearing tonight?” [He rambles on about clothes] Wille: “I don’t know if… If I’m coming.” Henry: “Okay…?” Simon: “I don’t know if I can come either.” Henry: “Oh come on, you two have to come!” [He rambles on about how much fun it will be] Simon: “Yeah, we’ll see. I have to go now.” Henry: “The point is that we have to be together! This is the only night we have together, maybe ever. [I mean, we are brothers!]”

In Swedish, Henry goes “vi är ju bröder” just as the music starts. This has been translated to “we are like brothers” in the English CC, which is already quite something, but the little word ju makes the original even stronger. It means that something is true, so instead of just saying they are like brothers, Henry is saying that is what they are.

(In the dub, there is an audible pause after like, so Henry is actually using it as a filler word. They should have put a comma in the CC to denote that.)

Given that Henry prefaces this ramble with “you two have to come” and barely stops to acknowledge Simon’s exit, there’s every reason to assume he is still talking about all of them. He is saying he considers himself, Wille, and also Simon part of the brotherhood that will be disbanded indefinitely come morning and wants them all to have one last night of fun together.

Simon never hears the brothers part and is of course frustrated with Henry for interrupting, but he still takes his leave on a casually friendly note. He gets that Henry wants him to come and have fun (Henry is unaware that Simon doesn’t drink when he tries to persuade them both by talking about the alcohol). Thus, Simon politely says “we will see” even though he has zero intention of going.

We do not see them interact at the party when Simon goes after all, but we do hear Henry being ushered away when Simon comes to talk to Wille. We don’t see it’s Henry, but someone insists that he wants to stay just as we see Walter and Alexander leave, and all three of them were there moments before:

I’m tempted to end this with a parallel to Wille’s initiation party.

Way back in 1.01, Henry and Simon were explicitly shown discussing the first party with their friends. They never talked about it with each other or interacted there – Henry attended as part of the in-crowd, and Simon only got to go because he supplied the alcohol. But for this last party, Henry was the one to get the alcohol, and he specifically invites Simon to come. They still don’t hang out as they are both there with their respective friends, i.e. in their own bubbles, but those bubbles do bump into/brush past one another without clashing.

Kind of like Henry and Simon’s lives.

Thank you for reading this marathon post! I hope my take on these two brings something to your next rewatch, whether you agree with me or not!

[transgender-mothman]

If you read my response, you’ll see I have played and run other systems. I have a large collection of ttrpgs, and have played quite a few. Many of them are small or indie, and I also have friends who are indie game designers (shout out to @strangeharpy !). I think my actual second longest campaign was a powered by the apocalypse one, and I have designed a d6 magical girl game system from scratch because I couldn’t find what I wanted in a pre-existing system. And it worked great and was very fun, if difficult, to do! I am a staunch supporter of indie games.

Now. That said. My current group does double back to 5e. That is very true. I’ve been playing 5e off and on for a long time, but I wouldn’t go so far as to say we are necessarily constantly “supporting a monopoly” in that … we already own the books, either physically or digital copies, and there’s no buying of every single thing wotc releases. We don’t use d&d beyond. We don’t run modules or whatever it is that wotc calls the prefab campaigns these days. I haven’t bought a new 5e book in YEARS, because there’s no need to and tbh I don’t care to give WotC more money particularly with the direction they’ve been going. My group play very home brew, very tweaked, very RP heavy games using the 5e system as a base, and it works for us. And that’s our prerogative and that’s totally fine to do! My initial statement stands—- play whatever, however, and with whoever is best for the experience YOU want to have.

As for why we go back to 5e, just because there are things we drop or leave out, doesn’t mean there aren’t aspects of it we love. The races, classes, feats, spells, and combat system work for us and you can really have such a different experience from campaign to campaign by mixing up what you play and how, and there are tons of (free) resources by players for players online to assist or add to your game. There’s a ton of actual play content, which is accessible and fun to engage with, that gets newbies a solid idea on how a ttrpg flows or works, and this is such a help for people who are apprehensive about starting. And for older players who have started with previous editions, there’s at least some commonality between versions (I started playing 3.5 myself). Not everyone who plays or continues to play 5e is actively harming the indie community by using resources they already have or games they are comfortable/familiar with.

I very much believe everyone should try other games if they’re able. There’s such a wealth of cool, unique games out by smaller companies and indie developers. But I do understand why 5e has a lot of pull to it— yes, it’s THE mainstream system, which unfortunately comes with all the other trappings of capitalism. But the game isn’t bad in and of itself and I don’t believe playing it, any way you want to, is a moral or ethical failing.

5e is a gateway game now more than ever. I am a very nerdy horror film guy, but I didn’t start with indie arthouse movies… like most people, I started with major Hollywood franchises, because of mass accessibility. Everyone starts somewhere! And not everyone will branch out from mainstream d&d to games that are more off the beaten track, same as not all horror fans will go from the Saw franchise to weird experimental horror that no one outside of Letterboxd has ever heard of. But you know what? Some will. And that’s great.

I think an important part of the "D&D is easy to learn" argument is that a lot of those people don't actually know how to play D&D. They know they need to roll a d20 and add some numbers and sometimes they need to roll another type of die for damage. A part of it is the culture of basically fucking around and letting the GM sort it out. Players don't actually feel the need to learn the rules.

Now I don't think the above actually counts as knowing the rules. D&D is a relatively crunchy game that actually rewards system mastery and actually learning how to play D&D well, as in to make mechanically informed tactical decisions and utilizing the mechanics to your advantage, is actually a skill that needs to be learned and cultivated. None of that is to say that you need to be a perfectly tuned CharOp machine to know how to play D&D. But to actually start to make the sorts of decisions D&D as a game rewards you kind of need to know the rules.

And like, a lot of people don't seem to know the rules. They know how to play D&D in the most abstract sense of knowing that they need to say things and sometimes the person scowling at them from behind the screen will ask them to roll a die. But that's hardly engaging with the mechanics of the game, like the actual game part.

And to paraphrase @prokopetz this also contributes to the impression that other games are hard to learn: because a lot of other games don't have the same culture of play of D&D so like instead of letting new players coast by with a shallow understanding of the rules and letting the GM do all the work, they ask players to start making mechanically informed decisions right away. Sure, it can suck for onboarding, but learning from your mistakes can often be a great way to learn.

[lalasimmer]

How to convert Sims 4 3D CAS Rooms to Sims 3

Disclaimer: If you’re not familiar with Blender/TSRW/UVs then this tutorial may not be for you. If you don’t have Sims 4 Studio which needs the Sims 4 base game (or don’t know how to extract the meshes without it) this tutorial may not be for you. Honestly it’s pretty straight forward, but there’s a lot of trial and error and going in game and out of game checking placement, etc. I use Blender 4.1 for this. The older Blender versions annoy me now lol I’m sorry 😅 but you should still be able to do the same things in the older versions. I'm trying to make this as easy as possible. I’m here to answer any questions though 💕 Tutorial below

Things you’ll need:

Blender (whatever version you prefer)

Sims 4 Studio

TSRW ( I use version 2.0.86)

My Christmas CAS Room here

My TSRW work file here

Tutorial:

Find a Sims 4 CAS room that you like and open it up in Sims4Studio. This is the one I'll be using for the tutorial.

In the Texture tab, export the textures. The only textures that matter are the first 3 diffuse. Go to the Meshes tab and export the mesh, it will save as a .blend file. After that you can close out of Sims4Studio.

Open my Christmas CAS Room in TSRW. You'll get this message. Hit ignore and don't send. We only need this file as a reference to resize the SIms 4 CAS room. Export the mesh as an obj, name it whatever you like. You can close TSRW for now.

Open Blender and open the .blend file you exported from Sims4Studio. Make sure to delete studio_mesh_0 as it's just the shadow map and we don't need that. This is what mine looks like after fixing the textures.

Then import the wavefront obj you just exported from TSRW. Again we're just using this as a size reference.

This is what it looks like after I added the obj. I scaled, moved, and rotated the room to match up as close as I could with my reference mesh. When you have it lined up to your liking you can delete the reference mesh. I usually import the sims 3 body to see where my sim would be in CAS as well so feel free to do that too.

Now we have to separate the objects that use transparency in the scene to their own group. The transparent objects will always be located on studio_mesh_1. I usually do this in UV mode. Make sure UV Sync Selection is on. Where the red arrow is, that's the UV Selection button. It's blue so that means its on.

Tip: If you're using the same Blender version I am (I'm not sure if the older versions below Blender 3.0 do this) you can disconnect the alpha in shader editor and then you can easily see what uses transparency because it has a black background like the plants. Don't worry about the one outside the window as that's on the backdrop image and doesn't show in CAS.

Important: Also, make sure you delete the back of the mirror frame or it will show through the mirror in game. I usually select it in the UV editor as well and delete it.

After selecting all the objects that use transparency, I go to the 3D viewport window and press P, then selection. Now they're on their own layer as you can see. That's a very important step so please don't miss it.

Sims 4 CAS Rooms don't have a closed room like ts3 and if you don't add walls/ceiling with planes you'll be able to see that it in CAS. You can do this in any way you're comfortable with. If you don't understand how to do it feel free to ask me. For this tutorial I will not be doing this perfectly lol I've done enough rooms and I'm just trying to teach here 😩

Okay now last is renaming groups to import into TSRW. Make sure it's in this exact order and uses the exact group numbers.

Group 0 - Mirror

Group 1 - Windows/Curtains

Group 2 - View outside the window

Group 3 - Walls

Group 4 - Objects with transparency

Depending on the CAS Room you convert, yours may not have a mirror you know. You can delete groups in TSRW, experiment, feel free to ask me questions as well.

After renaming the groups, select only the groups you renamed and export as an obj. Make sure that object groups is checked so that they can stay in groups.

Open TSRW and open the testroom_cas.wrk file.

After opening the file you'll see this exact room in this tutorial lol because I had to test some things first 😅

Import the CAS room you converted from. You'll get these two messages. Click yes on the first and no on the second.

Import your textures (yours may be different than mine depends on the converter) but most have been the same that I've seen. Group 0 is the mirror it doesn't require a texture. Group 1 and Group 4 usually have the same texture.

After export to sims3pack or export as package file. Make sure you compress your files and you should be good to test your CAS room in game.

If you would like to make your own from the original ts3 cas room, I would suggest watching this Youtube video (it's for TS4 but it still applies and is helpful) and the link to the original ts3 cas room is here. Since we can convert ts4 to ours you could probably just build your own and go from there as well.

Thanks to @mookymilksims for testing things for me and converting her own. If you would like to try this tutorial out and experiment with room placements using @boringbones Ultra wide CAS mod which changes the field of view in cas so that you can see the whole cas room, it is here. I didn't use it for mine, but that's only because I found out about it after from Mooky lol and I'm tired of converting them 😅 but feel free to ask me any questions if you need help 😊

[simvanie]

My 𝐓𝐨𝐩 24 𝐒𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬 from 2024🎉

Thank you @theplottdump and @duusheen for the tag!! 💗🥰

Tagging: @someone-elsa, @aurorangen, @thebramblewood, @tulipsimss, @cowplant-snacks, @rebouks, @bakersimmer, @flocy-sims, @cowplant-pizza, and of course whoever else would like to do this! (I've lost track of who has and hasn't already done this, so feel free to ignore if you have! <3)

Januari

I remember one of the first things I did when Supriya aged up into a teen was to have her take selfies. Because not only is that someting a pride generation heir would do, but at the time I also thought she was one of the prettiest teens in my game ever.

Februari

I decided to fully furnish and decorate an apartment for Supriya to live in and I think this is when I realized that I'm 100% a maximalist when it comes to interior design.

March

Ah, the night of the gala where Supriya and Rohan finally let their walls down 😊. I based the the outfits and the location of the gala (before they got back to Supriya's apartment) on the gala scene from the movie Maid in Manhattan which was a movie I really liked as a kid and for some reason that gala scene imprinted itself in my brain.

April

I love a good sunset. But what I love more is Rohan and Supriya getting engaged in front of a good sunset. The couple moved to Brindleton Bay where they fell even more in love with each other, and I fell in love with the Brindleton Bay heatwaves (when it doesn't rain that is). Rohan and Supriya eventually got married and it was my first cultural in-game wedding and, you guessed it, I loved it.

May

A pregnancy photoshoot with Supriya and Rohan in that little park with the blossom trees in Lykke Centre, Windenburg. The other screenshot is a screenshot with Cedia as a siren that I never posted in the Halloween post of last year, so I decided to make another post this year with the screenshots I also loved and that didn't make the cut back then.

June

I was still experimenting with my decorating skills and I had a lot of fun decorating the kids' playroom and Gulshan's bedroom when they were little.

July

I did an "end-of-generation" photoshoot with Supriya and also made one of my oc's, Fawzia, for Thebramblewood's vampire casting call who until then had only existed in my head. And for my legacy I wanted to try something different with the lighting in the screenshots where Gulshan and his friends are partying and I really liked how it turned out.

August

Sad boi.

September

Gulshan got his restaurant and I love everything about it. I started building this restaurant when I started the 7 sins legacy and I was so excited when I could finally play in it.

October

I took this screenshot after Gulshan earned 4 stars for his restaurant. I posed everyone except for Lord Hamlet. He just walked past and it turned out perfect for this screenshot. Did I mention Lord Hamlet already? BECAUSE LOOK AT HIM! At first I wasn't sure how a pig who is actually a dog would work out in game, but he is my favorite in-game pet ever and I love him so much. The last screenshot I made to showcase the Poppy cas set by Surely-sims and Ice-creamforbreakfast and all the screenshots for this are some of my favorite lookbook screenshots ever.

November

Sad man.

December

Nothing beats baking cookies with the love of your life on a snowy winter morning.

[johnybones56]

I don't have it anymore since it was a one-off experiment I ran exactly once but I did make a game centered around a (virtual) dXY table that changed X and Y because it was secretly rolling on a d555 with a lot of repeated entries.

It was a very free-form game consisting mostly of this table, which was a 5x5x5 matrix that I used some basic math to get a 2d "slice" of with the angle and starting depth being based on a few numbers I as the DM could input (iirc they were danger, plan viability, and thematic appropriateness) and the entries were varying degrees of success, partial success, and success-with-consequences. None of this was told to the players, who were told to just say what they wanted to do (it's fine because I'm very good at improvised RP, your milage may vary), and the fact every action moves the game forwards somehow combined with being entirely episodic - each session is a single mission - made for a pace and vibe really close to a TV comedy.

The premise helped a lot with that, the players were time agents correcting incidents between the years -5000 and 2500, but they're not allowed to know what happens after that and just have a list of loose but oddly specific requirements that the timestream has to meet in order for Whatever Needs to Happen post-2500 to go off without a hitch. For the one test game I did the problem was that Karl Marx fell way too hard for a girl while in college, settled down, got a normal job, and never got around to the whole communism thing. This is a problem because according to the higher-ups Russia needs to spend at least half of the 20th century under the rule of a party which calls itself communist and claims to follow the teachings of Karl Marx, regardless of their actual ideological principles or those of old Karl, so the gang need to go back in time and make him break up.

The party ended up breaking Karl Marx's heart so badly that he never got over it and, per the end-of-session timestream repercussion summary, communism became an explicitly sexist movement. I didn't plan that originally but I wanted to acknowledge how much they broke this dude. It was almost a little scary. This would lead to many feminist movements being fiercely and vocally anti-communist, which fascists used to infiltrate and eventually take over the Australian government. The timestream rules don't mention Australia so this is considered a job well done.

Hi! Your posts about d66 tables from a couple days ago have made me wonder, what other "formats"* of random tables are possible with any combination of no more than 2 dice**? I tried to google that but I don't know how to phrase the question

* by format i mean total number of items in the table

** of course I mean dice from a classic dice set: d4, d6, d8, d10, d12, d20

Assuming you want an evenly weighted table (i.e., each "number" has the same likelihood of coming up), you can in principle produce a table with any number of entries which is a multiple of the prime factors of the number sides on the available dice.

A d6 and a d10 between them offer prime factors of 2, 3, and 5 (the remaining dice in the standard polyhedral set furnish no additional prime factors), so using these dice alone you can construct an evenly weighted table with any number of entries which can be expressed as a multiple of 2, 3 and 5, in any combination.

Note that this isn't quite the same as simply multiplying the number of faces on the dice together, since we can "remove" unwanted prime factors by reading the dice in ranges. For example, a d6 and a d10 can produce an evenly weighted 60-entry table, but they can also produce an evenly weighted 30-entry table by reading the d6 as 1–2, 3–4, 5–6, or an evenly weighted 15-entry table by reading both the d6 and the d10 in spans of two. A similar trick with a pair of d6s can produce tables with 9 or 18 evenly weighted entries.

Limiting ourselves to no more than two dice basically just puts a limit on the number of prime factors we can include to make up the number of entries on a single table, which is where dice other than the d6 and the d10 come in handy; for example, the d4 nets us a pair of twos if we happen to need more than one, while the d20 gives us a pair of twos and a five to play with.

(Now, if you're also interested in unevenly weighted tables, that's where the question gets fun – there are a lot of ways to mathematically combine a pair of dice beyond just adding them together! Consider, for example, the distribution of results for 1d6x1d6, or for making a d66-style roll, but reading the results without regard for sequence, such that 1,2 and 2,1 are considered to be the same roll.)

[mysteriousbp]

Hey....

I created designs for Ceroba's parents for my AU.

So here's my mentality when designing my concepts for Ceroba's parents.

There aren't a lot of people's interpretations of Ceroba's parents out there. But the ones that I saw based them on the idea of them being hard on Ceroba. Teaching her to be a strong fighter and a warrior.

But I decided to approach it another way. Through her personality before Chujin's death. She mentions how she let Chujin work himself to death (because she didn't realize something was wrong) and that she saves her tears for moments that matter.

I decided to take that information and make it that she was raised to always think of the positive things in life. To not cry when something went wrong and think positively and turn it around.

That's my explanation in my AU for why she didn't realize something was wrong with her husband until it was too late. Why she was convinced so easily by Kanako to use her as an experiment for Chujin's work. Because she used to think that everything was already and it would work at the end. But it didn't

That's why she's so emotional and has big mood swings.  She lost almost all the positivity in her life. That all her other emotions are finally breaking free. 

So with that in mind, I decided to design the concept of her father with the idea of him being a gentle dad that deeply cares about Ceroba. I decided to base his design on the theme of plants and blossom trees that Ceroba has in some of her attacks. Making him a gardener and having the family business be a flower shop back in Ceroba's old town. Decided to make him a red fox show how Ceroba got the orange hair on her design.

I decided to name him Haruto because, according to my research, it can mean "rising with warmth and positivity" to go with this gentle dad idea. His surname being Sakuragi was chosen because, according to my research, it means "cherry blossom tree" to go with Ceroba's cherry blossom theme in the game.

I then decided to design the concept for Ceroba's mother. I decided to base her with the idea that Ceroba's fur color is tan. So I decided to make her a fennec fox. There's also the irony that Ceroba, being part fennec fox and living in a place that eventually became a desert, spends most of her life in. But also because fennec foxes also have some brown on her fur, explaining where the brown color that Kanako has came from, some of it came from her grandmother from her mother's side of the family. But also because my own mom is smaller than me. So I decided that I wanted her to be small from my personal experience. Ceroba's mother being small also works because I give her the fire spirit that Ceroba has. Growing up small but not stopping her reflecting on how Ceroba didn't give up until the very end of her fights.

I decided to name her Akane because, according to my research, it has the symbolic meaning of "passion and energy" because Akane refers to a reddish hue that is often associated with strong emotions, determination, and vitality. And also because I decided to make her the one that Ceroba's red and fire attacks would come from.

I don't know if they are bad concepts. But those are my takes on Ceroba's parents for my AU.

Also. I have Akane pink eyes in reference to some sprites of Ceroba.

This one.

[gerbithats]

The sims 4 is not a lost cause, it just needs some love.

SO i recently came back to playing sims 4 after a long hiatus and i have to say i'm surprised. I'm no EA apologist, they are indeed cashgrabby. But to see that lots of new features were integrated over the last few years that facilitated different styles of gameplay actually surprised me.

It seems tho that a pattern has been set, were they will release the most lackluster pack (whatever it is) and keep fixing it over the next few years. Pack reworks became a thing and thank god for it, since the releases don't seem to be stoping in order to give us better results.

It's a bittersweet feeling for sure. The game has more than 70 packs released and somehow it can still feel dead when it comes to live mode. And that's what this post is about: how could they bring the love the other games had for live mode in a base game that's so purposefully made for cas and build/buy?

Part 1: Nostalgia driven gameplay

Seeing the UI from the sims 1, 2 and 3 brings me back a lot of memories. It was a staple to this series that was lost due to a cleaner redesign. Not only that, but a core mechanic was also changed: the wants and fears system.

I believe that what makes me so nostalgic is TO KNOW that this worked so perfectly and hardly needed any refreshes.

Your sims now have emotions and yet, they rarely feel like something integrated to a goal or something you can truly affect while in gameplay.

Bringing back the wants and fears system would not only make our decisions during gameplay more impactful to our sims emotions, but also help to choose the direction any story could go.

An aspiration meter that's connected to the rewards shop would make decisions much more impactful (rather than getting them just by working through what is currently known as the "tutorial aspirations").

Your sims moods should be important, and so what makes them feel that way.

Part 2: World overload

With the amount of packs released, the world selection menu quickly became a problem. When seeing that screen, it all just feels like a blur of information that's been set in a certain way for convenience.

Maps such as these became popular in the community for a reason. The experience of playing needs to be inviting from the get go. It's clear tho that the reason behind not giving us something like this is no long term planning and pack exclusive experiences.

So what if it just became a larger sims world? A concept were you wouldn't select the city at frist, but the entire region were it is located in order to acess the one you prefer.

That would also make this refresh friendly to a future create a world tool (whenever that may come).

Part 3: Pack refreshes are the bread and butter of the future

Let's face it: we're stuck with this game for another 10 years at least. So other than dwell on the fact that we don't have open worlds or things of that nature, we should look at what can reasily be solved, and that's pack refreshes.

From seasons coming out without properly made textures and snow depth to functions that will simply not work as they should, I like to believe we do have a voice in this community. I made this post several years ago and now, looking back at it, I see so much improvement over things that we were desperately asking for.

Don't get me wrong, by that I don't mean that EA developers are searching through my page or yours to find what we think and expect for The Sims 4. But talking about these things openly as a community is what makes the difference.

Part 4: Simmers Unite

In conclusion: uniting our voices to ask for these things to come as refreshes and revamped features are crucial for the next few years. Let's, together, avoid a "my first snowdepth pack" or similar things that could yet come our way.

I created a blog called @sims4-communitywishes to reblog rants and wishes such as these. Our blogs and separate voices may be small, but a repository of it is much more impactful.

So thank you for reading this all the way through and in case you want to share your wishes for the future of The Sims 4, tag it as #s4comunitywishes

[thydungeongal]

Hi! I'm thinking to run a weird west game. I've tried Dogs in the Vineyard but found the narrative focus didn't have enough crunch. I've heard of Deadlands but my previous experience with a Savage World system was a bit shaky. I'm most familiar with 3.5e and 5e, Pathfinder 1e, and just picked up Lancer.

Please can you suggest any crunchy systems that would fit with weird west themes?

So, I can think of at least three crunchy western RPGs but I have not had a chance to play any of them and two of them are out of print. Also, I am uncertain how well they would adapt to a weird west setting, but here goes:

First up, the one that is in print: Aces & Eights is a Western RPG by Kenzer & Co. whose main claim to fame is that it is crunchy as all hell. Gunfighting consists of laying out a shot clock (a type of crosshair template) on top of an enemy silhouette and then an attack roll results in the shot itself moving into an appropriate spot based on the roll. It kinda sounds cool as hell but as stated I haven't had a chance to play it, and I'm not confident in how well it translates to the weird west genre.

Next up is Boot Hill. Now, I don't know a lot about Boot Hill, but I know that it is a crunchy and deadly wild west game published by TSR, and the AD&D 1e DMG actually has guidance on how to convert characters between the two games, so one option you would have would be to run Boot Hill and just convert supernatural stuff into it from AD&D 1e! This would probably be pretty bad, but I have to admit that it does sound kind of fun.

Third option, and this one is also sadly out of print, would be Outlaw baybeee!!!! Outlaw is actually a setting for Rolemaster/Spacemaster 2e that adapts the extremely crunchy system full of lovely stupid tables into the wild west. Outlaw is pretty much just Rolemaster in the wild west and it even gives a bit of advice on how to run a western campaign with fantastic elements. Not a lot of advice, mind, but you could literally just smash spell users from Rolemaster into Outlaw and be done with it.

Anyway, that's all I can offer, sadly. I'm unfortunately not very knowledgeable of western or weird west games.

[itsenytime]

Video Game Roleplay and Why I Loved Balloon SMP

So I am a bit late to this party, but have just finished watching through a full set of VODs for the Minecraft Balloon SMP through woops' POV. I absolutely LOVED it. I saw bits and pieces about it while it was on-going but wasn't able to catch enough of it at the time to get as engrossed as I had recently after watching through the wonderfully edited videos (by JillTime) on woops' YouTube channel. Starting out with the edited videos, I was under the impression it was going to be a fun, silly large scale Minecraft SMP run with a bunch of people and a Balloon theme. As it started to go on, it started to click that this was going to run deep and hit hard. I’m going to dig much more into the plot and story beats in other posts, but I really want to highlight is the Roleplaying environment the players were put in. I had seen someone describe it like a Tabletop Roleplay system like Dungeons & Dragons, but this hits what I prefer roleplaying in more, Sandbox Video Games and Roleplay. I have spent a lot of time over a decade roleplaying through video games. The top example was a heavy roleplay in a Half-Life 2-based environment using Garry’s Mod. Sandbox games are perfect to give players an environment to properly thrive in and explore their characters and others without overt restrictions. Balloon SMP was able to do this amazingly with Minecraft. Using a wonderful basis for plot with a great end goal and deadline, and then doing amazing improvisation was amazing. It never felt manufactured or forced, and the wonderful team running it did great to let the players do what they felt was right. The best thing was the nudges and ways of pushing the players to see how they reacted instead of telling them how to react. It’s always been my experience in roleplay in general to never tell someone how to feel, but instead to give them a reason to feel a certain way. They may not react the way you expected, but you now have a change that you can work with and explore. This was a sort of ramble, but I needed to at least get this down because holy shit it’s been a long time since I’ve seen such a wonderful example of video game roleplay and I am just enamored by the whole thing. I’ll definitely post more on this and my thoughts as I get them organized.

~ Eny

[dontcallmetreffy]

Now that we have a confirmed date: here is my Nocturne Bingo card! Feel free to use, just credit back to me! (I’m curious as to what y’all think might happen this season, although the trailer already confirmed a few points since I made this months ago 👀)

[seiwas]

sellllllll it's meeeeee. hehehehehehehehehhehe

so for ur writing exercises.... deku + light? please? pretty please?

:3c

heheh heheh hehe niku. this will be the death of me. me writing izuku for the first time 🥲 i will only do this for you </3

contains: established relationship, spoilers for the end of the manga, aged up deku but sometime in between the final outcome (he doesn't get the h*** s*** from bakugo yet), mentions of sex and scars

deku + light

izuku only sleeps with the lights off.

it isn't uncommon; many people you know can't sleep with even just a sliver of light turned on somewhere in the room. but the difference with izuku, you learn, is not that he's unable to stand the light―it's that he refuses to.

you quickly pick up on it the first few times he sleeps over.

he fidgets in bed, pretty badly, actually. the nightlight you sleep with glows a warm yellow, illuminating the side of your face and coating him in its afterglow. you chalk it up to nerves, how he pulls at his sleeves and adjusts his position constantly; he is, after all, one of the most anxious people you know.

and this relationship―it's new. heck, even you feel a little jittery with his arm wrapped around you.

the rhythmic tapping on your hip only increases pace. you don't think he realizes it, so your hand gently reaches for his, intertwining your fingers as you turn around in his arms.

he's close, nearly touching you nose-to-nose; the proximity leaves you fuzzy, a little ticklish, so you giggle, a soft "oops," as the freckles dusting his face almost glisten under the warm light.

"hi," you whisper, meeting his eyes; they stare back at you wide in surprise, "can't sleep?"

he looks almost guilty at your question, as if you’ve caught him with the one thing he's been trying to keep from you.

"just—" his voice comes out louder than intended, prompting him to chuckle nervously as he readjusts his volume, "just winding down, sorry."

you inch closer, nuzzling his nose lightly, "it's okay."

"did i wake you?" he asks, cheeks flushing pink as his eyebrows furrow in immediate concern. his expression is something caught between stifling a grin and feeling sorry.

you shake your head against the pillow you share, strands of your hair tangling with his. "just winding down," you tease, watching as his gaze turns softer, eyelids drooping heavier.

sometimes, you think, izuku holds the world in his eyes―a deep, dark green, the color of life. most times, they look at you with wonderment, bright and alive; photos from inko tell you they're the eyes of his inner child.

on nights like this one, however, they hide a depth in them weighted by what you can only assume is time, and all that has happened to him in such a short span of it.

you try your best to understand what lies beneath them, knowing full well he'll never tell you outright what truly bothers him.

"is it the light?" you bring up, some time after laying in silence.

"hm?" he clarifies.

"do you have a hard time sleeping with the nightlight?"

his eyes widen briefly once more, as if shocked that you've caught him again. these split second reactions are ones you've learned to be attentive to when it comes to izuku.

"no," he tries to lie, but you know better as you turn to your nightstand and reach for its switch, "you don't–"

"it was hurting my eyes," you quickly make up an excuse, tucking yourself closer under his chin as you cut off his attempt to deny it again.

finding out that the light was the problem was the easy part—

you'd begun to notice much earlier on that izuku was barely rested on the nights he'd spend at your place. it was only when your old nightlight broke that you began to notice him waking up much later than you did, groggily rousing from a deep sleep.

—what was hard, was figuring out why.

at first, you suspected it was his scars.

"s-sorry, it's not—" he'd warned you, right as your hands gripped the hem of his shirt the first time you were about to have sex, "—it's not nice."

you didn't care though; you still don't care, and you've made that abundantly clear to him since. you love izuku and all his parts―all the nicks and jaggedy pieces of skin that make up who he is.

when you eventually ask him about it, with a request that he be honest with you for once, he tells you that it is and it isn't―the reason why he exclusively sleeps with the lights off, that is.

it's an odd, comforting relationship he has with his body—that he is simultaneously grateful and sorry for how its become a canvas, both painted and marred to symbolize japan’s historic last stand.

you find out the real reason when you catch him staring at his hands.

he does it often, when he thinks you aren't looking—his fists bunched up in the same way he used to watch the power of one for all course through his fingertips; the same way he used to prepare them in battle.

there’s a faraway look in his eyes that lingers, you notice—a little wistful if anything.

“do you miss it?” you finally ask. he gives you the same shocked look he does every time, as if he’s been caught with a secret he’s been trying to hide.

he’s learned a fair bit about you now, too, though—lying to you is futile when you’ve perfected reading his truth. he stares at his fists again as you take a seat beside him, moving to give you space. you rest your head on his shoulder gently, waiting.

“sometimes,” he admits, but you know it’s an understatement.

“i think about the vestiges a lot. i miss them the most, i think,” he continues, clenching his fists tightly, “i always try to reach out to them, but i guess it doesn’t work that way.”

“i… i try to replicate the right conditions every night, but…” then he lets go, stretching his fingers out wide. the scars on the surface ripple through his skin, telling its own story.

you hum, acknowledging what he means. silence sits with the two of you as you take his hand in yours, slowly unfurling his fingers until his palm reveals itself to you. it’s rough to the touch, seasoned with hard work and all that he’s been through.

“is that why you prefer the dark?” you ask softly, after some time.

it's not often that you stay up later than izuku does. when you do though, you catch him shifting in bed, moving from side-to-side. you pretend you aren't awake, but you hear him mumble their names, dwindling in volume as he dozes off to sleep.

he stares at his palm for a moment before he admits quietly, "yeah." his brows furrow as if contemplating whether to say more, but he shakes his head, dark green strands swaying to the beat of his embarrassed chuckle, "nevermind, it's silly."

"it's not."

you intertwine your fingers, sandwiching his hand between yours. a slight sheen glosses over his eyes as he tilts his head up to look at you. he draws in a breath, before it spills over.

"it's..." he finds the words, and you squeeze his hand in comfort, "it's easier to believe it was all real when the lights are out, and that maybe it can happen again."

[theduvetpirate]

Yeah I get that for sure, the game doesn’t offer you a choice but I also see a lot of people conflating his upset with hate and I just really don’t think that he hates Shepard at all?

Idk it’s personal to each person I guess but from my pov the first thing he does is hug Shepard and then reacts quite rationally to his closest person being dead for 2years no contact suddenly appearing with a terrorist group and being like “hey kaidan how’ve you been? 😀”

I would be angry too if I’d been traumatised by leaving the person I love behind on her orders to then receive no word from her (again, defo not the players fault but that is the way it’s written) but it wouldn’t mean that I hate them Id just need time to process this new info again, which is what he’s done by Me3, and then I think it’s actually LESS realistic to have that person just accept in 3 mins at first glance that Shepard in front of them actually is their Shepard and not some experiment by Cerberus in the first place after spending the entire previous time together pretty much taking apart Cerberus bases and experiments…

Idk, I can understand some of the points Espesh when it comes to the writing and the player’s lack of ability to change the story choices with the virmire survivor -defo frustrating- but a LOT of the kaidan hate I’ve seen seems to just boil down to “I don’t like that he didn’t immediately drop everything for Shepard/I don’t like that he had an angry reaction to Shepard/he cheated with a doctor” when to me it’s clear he’s spent two years trying to move past what was probably hella traumatising, starting to make progress and she’s just appears out of nowhere with a whole new team

And then he sends the email and Idk I personally loved it!! From Me1 Kaidan is shown as a character to be emotionally mature and worked through his demons, so to me if anything his outburst on Horizon is because he cares about Shepard so much his control slips, and then with the email I just thought ok fair enough!! he reacted angrily after his base was attacked and in shock that Shepard is actually truly alive as any person might but then recognised that he was maybe wrong to react that way in the moment, apologises first then lets her know he went on one date at the request of his friends which he specifically says was not serious, and tells her he needs time but essentially leaves the door open, again reiterating that he doesn’t trust Cerberus and to be careful, so idk how that comes across as hating shep when to me it read more like an apology for a shock response..

This was a looooooong ramble hahahaha but yeah I basically understand 100% why you feel that way, cos the forced choice of joining Cerberus defo doesn’t lend to then having people angry at you in game, but I just think it’s so strange that 98% of the fan base hates him and so few people seem to be able to cut some slack for Kaidan given the entire context/circumstances that the conversation goes down

I am prepared to be hated but I really think Garrus is a bit overrated?????? I went into this game being like damn Garrus is clearly the one to be with cos of how popular he is and don’t get me wrong I LOVE that turian so much he’s a bestie fr but I had actually 0 interest in romancing him at all???

Prepared for double the hate but yall overhate Kaidan as well lmao he does not deserve the hate he gets I love him !?? his romance for fem shep was completely fine and destroyed me at the end of 3 even with horizon (this is a whole separate thing but some of you willingly decide to not see he has some very valid points on horizon), and I love Thane too so I’m excited to see his romance now on my second play through but damn…

[centaurianthropology]

One thing that I think a lot of Disco Elysium meta misses (likely because a lot of it is very clearly written by young Americans writing from an intensely American-centric cultural perspective without even really realizing it) is that one of the singular and central themes of the game is massive-scale generational trauma in a home that is economically collapsing as its resources and people are being drained by an occupation.  People have noted that no one tries to help Harry, despite the fact his mental illness is incredibly obvious to everyone around him.  He tells Kim that he completely lost his memory, and Kim politely asks him to focus on the work.  He tells Gottlieb that he had a heart attack, and Gottlieb tells him that if he’s still alive it couldn’t have been that bad.  That he’ll drop dead sooner or later, but then so does everyone.

And that’s the most important thing: so does everyone.  Look at Martinaise.  Look at the world in which Harry lives.  It is not our own, but it is adjacent to ours.  More specifically, it is clearly adjacent to the states of the Eastern Bloc: overtaken and occupied by a faraway government that clearly doesn’t care about Revachol or its people.  And that is obvious in every tired face, every defeated citizen, everyone trying to eke out a little happiness or meaning in spite of the overwhelming trauma and damage around them.  The buildings are still half-destroyed.  The bullet holes are still in the walls.  The revolution was decades before, but it still feels to the people there like a fresh wound.  The number of men of Harry’s generation who are not alcoholic or otherwise deeply fucked up are very few.  Some, like Kim, hide it better, but the deeper you dig into his history, the more you realize how damaged Kim is.  He’s more than a little trigger happy, and hates that about himself, but he is a product of his environment: Kim’s entire life is seeing people he cared about shot and killed, so his instinct now is to shoot first himself, to protect those few people left who still matter to him.

Harry is not unique in his trauma.  He is a distillation of an entire culture of people who tried to rise up and make something beautiful, and were instead routed and occupied.  He is trapped between the occupation and the people on the ground, along with all the rest of the RCM.  Their authority comes from the occupying government, but it is implied that they were formed out of the remnants of the citizens militia which sprung up from Revachol itself as a way to try to mitigate some of the horrors being committed on its streets.  The Moralintern sure as hell wasn’t going to get their hands dirty, so they happily conscripted (and therefore could better control) this group, who are only recognized in certain places, and whose authority mostly amounts to giving out fines.  The RCM is corrupt, but it is corrupt in the same way its culture is.  Bribes are considered standard with them, not a moral failing, but a necessity, so long as those bribes are correctly logged as ‘donations’.  It’s how the RCM stays afloat, and the rest of Revachol completely understands that.  Everyone would take a bribe if it meant they kept eating.  Everyone would take a little under-the-table money if it meant keeping a roof over their heads.  The officersof the RCM certainly don’t make enough to see a doctor.  They have an in-house lazarus, and if he can’t fix them they just die.  Mental health care?  What mental health care?  Harry doesn’t get it for the same reason no one else does: it doesn’t really seem to exist.  There are no counselors, no psychologists, no psychiatrists.  How would they even start?  If the world is what is broken, if everyone is suffering a similar catastrophic amount, it makes sense that Harry’s trauma would simply get rolled up with all the rest.  Kim asks him to get on with the job because Harry’s suffering is not remarkable in Revachol.  He is one of an entire generation who have an astronomical number of orphans from the revolution, and so many younger people are left more or less orphans as their parents drink themselves into oblivion like Cuno’s father.  So Harry’s truly unique attribute is embodying all that trauma, having it all inside of him, filling him to bursting.

To really engage with the themes of the game, engaging first and foremost with the reality of Revachol is imperative.  Imposing our own reality onto Revachol, particularly if coming from an American perspective (which tend to have the habit of both viewing the world through an American lens and not realizing they’re doing it because they’ve never experienced a different lens), will always feel shallow to me because of this.

All that is to say, I would love to hear some more explicitly European meta about this game, and especially Eastern European meta.  If anyone can point me to some good, juicy essays from that perspective, I would be grateful!