#a fix-it in some sort?

[morathicain]

It’s time for a new happiness - Pisaeng/Kawi

Warning: breakup, miscommunication, the author’s frustration about episode 10 screams loud in this one

!Don’t like don’t read and don’t complain if you still do it!

Anyway, have fun? I guess?

When Kawi entered their apartment around midnight after his latest concert gig, exhaustion weighing heavy on his shoulders, the lights were still on. Was Pisaeng still awake?

They rarely met at nights like this because Pisaeng  had to get up early and Kawi usually came home late and needed some time to rewind, even if his body screamed for the bed already. Sometimes he’d even sleep on the sofa just so he wouldn’t disturb his partner of eight years. But today, it was different and when Kawi met Pisaeng in the kitchen, sitting on one of the chairs with only a glass of water in front of him, clearly waiting, the dread finally settled in his bones.

He hated this. He’d always hated this. The tension of a serious talk to come, the helplessness of not knowing what would be said, the inability to anticipate the next words, the outcome and what he was supposed to say to make it right, to make it better. Kawi would much rather figure things out on his own and change them so that there was no talk necessary. It had come to the point where Pisaeng didn’t even try anymore and in Kawi’s book that was a win, right? Right?!

“Oh, hey”, he laughed awkwardly, carefully putting his bags away instead of dropping them into the most convenient corner, “You can’t sleep?”

Pisaeng’s voice was somber and calm, not the way he’d usually greet Kawi with a smile that could be heard in every corner of their rooms: “Hello Kawi. How was the gig?”

“Good, good”, Kawi let out an awkward laugh, the tension in his neck so high by now, it was a wonder he hadn’t turned into a stone statue yet, “A full house and the owner gave us a bonus for getting so many people in.”

The following chuckle was a bit softer, Pisaeng’s “I am glad then” almost normal enough for Kawi to persuade himself that everything was well. That it was nothing but his exhausted imagination, that ...

“Kawi”, the seriousness was back and Kawi’s breath caught in his throat, “I know you’re tired and I’m sorry but we need to talk and I haven’t seen you for three days.”

“Ah”, Kawi straightened and scratched his neck with an awkward laugh, avoiding his partner’s eyes desperately, “I’m sorry, it’s been such a busy week with the festival and our usual gigs. I promise it will get better soon. Did you eat anything already?”

“Kawi ...”

“You probably did, of course”, Kawi forced himself not to run to the fridge, taking the longest way possible so he wasn’t anywhere near Pisaeng, “Did you go shopping as well? I am starving, I tell you. They always want to give us drinks but never food.”

“Kawi ...!”

Not even perceiving what was in the fridge, Kawi closed it forcefully again, wincing. “Was your day okay? I know the office has some deadlines coming up, right? You really shouldn’t have waited, I know you don’t get enough sl ...”

A loud bang made Kawi flinch and shut up, involuntarily turning around towards Pisaeng. Pisaeng who was standing by now, leaning on both his hands on the table, trembling. It was a foreign experience to see Pisaeng’s anger so clearly, mixed with a new kind of helplessness, for once not covered by a smile.

“Pisaeng, why ...”

“I’m in love with someone else.”

Kawi’s whole body froze and he could do nothing but stare. What?

Taking a deep breath, Pisaeng reigned in the anger, leaving only sadness: “I have fallen in love with someone else and I want to break up.”

Break up? Nausea overwhelmed Kawi’s mind, flashbacks of their moments together, of bad futures and trying pasts threatening to overcome him.

“I’m sorry”, Pisaeng looked as if he wished he could step close to comfort Kawi but he stayed put, didn’t move even for one centimeter, “We tried and you tried, I know. But while trying to give everyone a happy future and make the right decisions, we can’t forget our own. And this right now? It’s not making either of us happy.”

The words sank in like stones and Kawi felt sick to his stomach. He could do nothing but curl his hands into fists and stare and wish himself away.

A look of pity crossed Pisaeng’s face and Kawi hated it, hated the whole man suddenly, no matter how afraid he was to let him go, to be left alone, once again.

“He”, Kawi swallowed, “Doe he ...” make you happy?

The pity vanished and Kawi didn’t know what to make of the mixture of emotions he now saw: “Of course, that’s the thing you’d ask about. You’re not even angry, not ... Kawi, I didn’t cheat on you, I only fell for someone else and had to realise that we don’t work out anymore. Haven’t done so for a long time actually.”

“Who ...”

“Does it matter? I haven’t even told him yet and I’m not sure I will. Not for a while at least, not while I still struggle with my feelings for you.”

Kawi swallowed: “Do you still love me?”

Pisaeng looked away for a moment, choosing his next words carefully, deliberately, putting another knife into Kawi’s heart anyway: “Not like I used to. Not the way I need to, to stay your partner. I still love our memories, your fondness of food, your puppy eyes and your voice, but it’s different. It’s not enough.”

 ‘You’re not enough’ was the addition Kawi couldn’t but hear next to Pisaeng’s actual words. It hurt despite knowing that Pisaeng would tell him it wasn’t the case if he uttered those thoughts. It hurt ...

“Kawi”, Pisaeng said after a long moment of silence and Kawi could see and hear the old fondness again, proof of what they’d once had, “It’s not your job to make everyone happy. We’re all our own people and now it’s your job to find your own.”

It was as if a big weight had suddenly dropped from the centre of his chest. Tears threatened to overcome Kawi and he didn’t even know why. Was it heartbreak? Was it relief? All at once?

Tentative steps made him look up, his sight foggy from the tears in his eyes, his breath trembling. Now, Pisaeng was finally in front of him, so familiar and strange at once, his face and body screaming “sorry” and Kawi didn’t want to hear it. But he also did and he didn’t know, wouldn’t know ...

“What do you need, Kawi? Right now?”

The softness was killing him but with the gates that had been closed for so long open suddenly, he couldn’t stop the flood, the sudden surge of needs and wishes and dreams and broken hopes.

“Can you hug me?”, he asked, voice trembling, “One last time?”

And Pisaeng smiled, almost like in old times.

“Of course.”

~~~

The next morning, Pisaeng packed a small suitcase and a bag.

“What about the sheets you chose?”

“You can keep them.”

“They’re ugly, I don’t want them”, Kawi pulled a face and Pisaeng laughed.

“I’ll get them later when I have a new apartment.”

Kawi hummed in agreement and watched his now ex-partner considering his packing carefully. Still in his pyjamas, Kawi was sipping his coffee, his heart weirdly calm and peaceful. Maybe it was because he’d cried so much last night or maybe it was just a short moment, maybe it was real relief. Whatever it was, Kawi didn’t want to think too much about it currently because right now, he felt more relaxed than he’d done for ages. Which was a realisation he for sure had to delve into later but not now.

Now, he was laughing at his boyfriends ex-boyfriends friends (?) struggles with the knowledge that this wouldn’t be the end, no matter what path they’d choose in the future.

“Don’t go the lone wolf route, alright? Tell Max, tell Pear if you want to and I know Fluke will be happy to support you, too. Don’t think you’re alone again, okay? Because you aren’t.”

“Okay, okay”, Kawi rolled his eyes fondly, “I’ll let you know I’m still alive from time to time.”

Pisaeng huffed and flicked Kawi’s forehead before turning to the door: “I’ll tell you as soon as I have an apartment and we can sort out the rest then.”

“Sure, sure ... wait!”

Confused, Pisaeng stopped and stood there while Kawi ran into the kitchen suddenly and came back with an old, battered up mug full of blue turles which he pushed into Pisaeng’s hands: “Don’t forget your old favourites. Even if you’re on your way to find new ones.”

And Pisaeng smiled, pressing the mug against his chest: “I promise I won’t.”

the End

[skellydun]

who wants to lay on top of me like a weighted blanket and fix me

[caffichai]

Mandragora Arknights good ending

She got got better as a person and also physically :)

[theresistanceneverquits]

There’s not enough people talking about how important Stephanie is to Damian’s growth pre-Flashpoint.

Bruce had seen Damian as a beast to be tamed, Tim sees him as a ticking time bomb, and Dick is far better with him but he’s still an authority figure for Damian to combat with. But then he meets Stephanie, a college-aged girl who nobody trusts and he bullies her relentlessly and becomes inseparable from her.

She doesn’t interact with him based on his past, but on what she can see. This 10 year old just threatened to kill her? Wow he doesn’t get outside much. He’s not old enough to have seen Gremlins. What do you MEAN you’ve never been inside a bouncy house before we are fixing that immediately.

They are like cousins to each other. They poke fun at each other for being lame and stupid and Dick has to tell them both to shut up. She doesn’t see him as a project to be molded and redeemed, he’s just a kid with a crappy childhood like her and if he’s nice to her for 5 seconds she’ll do something with him to let him feel like a kid. And he doesn’t look at her and see a liability or a failure or a lost cause, like everyone she’s ever interacted with does. When he’s awful to her, it’s because he’s an obnoxious preteen boy.

And then you get the “there’s room in our line of work for hope, too” scene. Because Damian has gotten to know Steph and he can’t fathom why she’s here. She obviously has had to deal with crap and is still working through being kept on a leash by Nightwing and Oracle, but she isn’t broken like the rest of them are. Damian is surrounded by people who were molded and shaped and torn down and broken to become the monoliths that they are, and then there’s this girl who seems so at peace with herself and is constantly making quips, and it’s so foreign to him.

And she tells him that she’s in his world because she believes people are worth fighting for.

[ominouspuff]

Big Bro Marshal Commander behavior

-

Working with a set palette for this one

[cubbihue]

I NEED to know what CosWan think of Hazel’s parents/their lovely neighbors compared to Timmy’s bio fam

They see moments, sometimes. Scary moments where it hit them like deja vu. But, aside from their initial fears when meeting their neighbors, they find it hard to think of the Turners in the same breath as the Wells family.

Hazel’s parents are just so… different. Relieving even. There's a lot of "Never"s with Hazel's parents. Cosmo and Wanda can leave Hazel’s side for long periods of time, without worrying.

Not that they ever stop worrying. They still do. But its a first that their worries are unwarranted.

Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]

[lost-sheep]

Queen of the Black Water Territory, Shi Qingxuan, greets his Brother.

[shevr]

[dykedvonte]

I just realized some people are confused about events in the alluded to past in Mouthwashing, particularly about how long the crew has been working together.

The only person who is truly new is Daisuke and it’s why his dynamic with the crew and role in the story is very unique and somewhat distant. Curly didn’t just get Jimmy this job on the Tulpar, he got him the job with the Pony Express. He’s been his copilot for probably a couple of years but still not as long as they’ve been friends. None of them are new with the freight industry, Anya and Swansea especially have been doing this for years, together.

Jimmy is the newest on the regular crew, maybe just a few assignments, but it’s not his first time working with them. I think it’s just something important because this isn’t just one bad mistake that snowballed with giving Jimmy the job. None of them thought Jimmy would do anything, no matter how off-put by him they could’ve been, since he hadn’t done a thing since being there. Generally unpleasantness isn’t a crime and he’d be aware of that.

It was a festering thing and a sort of forced trust they had to give him that he knowingly took advantage of. He was the black sheep and still a wolf under the wool. He expected when he lashed out, that he had been there long enough for it to be looked over completely. Got too comfortable in the space he inserted into and did a lot of damage with his claws when he felt he was going to get shaken out.

[nattikay]

the constant inner struggle of a Na'vi speaker/teacher browsing Na'vi OCs

[aecholapis]

October 18th - Prime and Protector

Tarn / Optimus Prime

For the @tfrarepairing fest 2024

[faxaway]

sharp teeth nines yay or nay

[ohno-the-sun]

Found this old comic in my drafts

[theramblingvoid]

I think for 2025 The Mountain Goats should release a sequel to This Year that is also called This Year but instead of "I am gonna make it through this year if it kills me" the primary repeated lyric should be "I am going to kill this year before it kills me". As a threat. Gotta keep the new year in its place.

[arsenicflame]

It's a time-honoured tradition- every time Sam comes across Izzy (and Ed) in their travels, he asks Izzy to marry him. And every time, Izzy turns him down.

At this point, Sam is asking more for the sake of it than any belief Izzy will ever say yes, a remnant of childhood dedication touched with 30 years of heartbreak and regret- though even now, a small part of him still holds out hope. Sam's promises have only got more extravagant over the years, from a job as his first mate, to a captaincy, a fleet at his command, a whole fucking island if that's what Izzy wants- but he knows it isn't though, not really. If Izzy was ever going to agree to marry him, to leave his life and go with Sam, it wouldn't be for anything Sam could offer him. Izzy never did care for flashy shows of wealth, for a ship or to be captain. The only thing that ever mattered to him was loyalty given, and loyalty shown in return. 

It all comes to a head after Stede left and came back, after Izzy lost a toe, lost his leg. Sam hasn't seen him since before things with Ed started to really slide off the rails, before stress permanently set into the lines of Izzy’s face. So, when he sees a dishevelled man with a hoof for a leg in a no-name port, he doesn't even consider the idea that he might know him. It's only when he turns towards him, and Sam catches a glance at those oh too familiar tattoos, he realises this is Izzy, his Izzy, that stands before him.

Knowing Izzy's discomfort with pity, he doesn't treat him any differently than he would in years gone by, positioning himself in Izzy's line of sight before approaching and sweeping him up into a bone crushing hug. 

“Israel-goddamn-Hands!” he exclaims, as Izzy grumbles back a begrudging “Samuel-fucking-Bellamy”, a tradition almost as old as their friendship itself. Izzy might not hug him back, but he can’t keep the corner of his mouth from twitching, just for a second.

(If Sam holds Izzy a little tighter and a little longer than usual, well. That's his business)

By the time Sam lets go, most of the crew has appeared in the town square, drawn in by the commotion. They may have given Izzy his leg and welcomed him as one of them, but still there’s an underlying tension, with nobody quite ready to set aside everything that happened before the Kraken. Seeing him cosying up to an unknown man sets everyone on edge, unsure whether to come to their first mate’s aid, or to assume that they've been betrayed once again.

When Ed sees that the yelling was Sam, his hand goes tense where it's held in Stede's. He knows the routine, has seen it more times than he can count, but as he watches them part he realises that this is the first time in a long time he's unsure of what Izzy's response will be.

Knowing that something’s different, knowing that Izzy's feeling vulnerable already, Sam doesn't go for the same flashy proposal he’s been giving for years. He doesn't promise Izzy the world, he doesn't cause a scene (or, any more of a scene than he already has, anyway). He looks at the fractured man in front of him, takes his face in his hands, and says the exact same thing to him he said when they were little more than boys. “Israel, I have to ask you. I know what you'll say, but I have to try. Come with me. Marry me and sail away with me. I'll keep you safe”

And Izzy… hesitates. He glances over at Ed, at Stede, and says to Sam “...We’re staying in port for a week. Ask me again then”

That's the moment Sam knows there is something deeply, horribly, wrong. He's not just looking at an Izzy who got seriously injured in a fight and is struggling to cope, this is something so much bigger than that- and that Ed has something to do with it. Izzy wouldn't even be considering leaving if he didn't. Whether it was negligence or something more sinister, Sam doesn't yet know, but he intends to find out.

[ominouspuff]

Victory (smile, we’re on TV)

REQUESTS / BLOG EVENT

Request from @gaeasun - Palette #2 - Dogma, Tup - Slice of Life

Winning the bake-off by a landslide is prime brotherly-bonding and a test of one’s prowess in chemical warfare of the best and tastiest kinds.

Thank you for requesting, @gaeasun , this one was a delight to draw!