#a cure for wellness icons

[editfandom]

Hannah Von Reichmerl - A Cure for Wellness, 2016

[sugar-violence]

[divorcedwife]

love this guy, sure hope his life doesn't take a turn for a worse after this

[kotaki]

character tropes

↳ Hirogaru Sky! Pretty Cure → Sora Harewataru

[doll4viets]

Mia Goth, 2024.

[eggmeralda]

that period of time between south park post covid being announced in 2021 to summer 2022 when everyone got obsessed with truffula flu was moderately heavenly

[poisonouspastels]

There's gonna be a big MC AU megaref update soon btw

[lowkeyren]

—my muse, my cure.

in which : both you and jiaoqiu are deeply concerned about each other's health but have an unconventional way of showing it.

pairing : jiaoqiu x gn!reader

wc 850, established relationship, 2.5 spoilers woops (but this isn't angst trust), also ib by an iconic line in 2.5 iykwim, art by @/Lianzi_ on x, reblogs r much appreciated!!!

how do we get a picky eater to eat green peppers?

being a picky eater isn't easy, especially when you have a sly fox like jiaoqiu in your kitchen.

you think you're safe when you see a simple, mouthwatering dish; but with him, there's always a catch. beneath the savoury aroma of perfectly cooked meatballs or the comforting warmth of a soup, he hides the things you avoid —finely diced peppers, a hint of spice, or icky vegetables you swore you’d never touch.

jiaoqiu doesn’t say a word, but the way his ears twitch gives him away. he watches with a subtle, knowing grin as you take a bite, waiting for you to realize what he’s done. though by the time you do notice, it’s already too late. despite your best efforts, the subtle icky flavour of green peppers have already permeated your taste buds.

“you didn’t even notice, did you?” he teases, his voice laced with mischief.

you shoot him a glare as you reluctantly finish the dish, the flavours blending together so seamlessly that you almost forget what you were trying to avoid in the first place. (seems like his culinary skills managed to win you over once again)

“that’s not very polite of you, doctor.” 

jiaoqiu’s smile widens at your response. “ah, come on now,” he says, feigning a hurt expression. “it's all in good fun. besides, you know those peppers are packed with vitamins. it’s good for you.”

you let out an exaggerated sigh, your irritation still simmering. “well, just because your dish turned out good, don’t think i’m letting you off the hook that easily,” you say, rolling your eyes, though a small smile tugs at the corners of your mouth.

jiaoqiu only chuckles at your response, clearly amused. “i see how it is,” his tone taking on a teasing lilt as he steps a little closer, “you best stay on your guard then, dearest.” 

“how do we get a picky eater to eat green peppers?” the answer is quite simple. chop the peppers and mix them with minced meat to make meatballs, allowing the meat’s flavor to mask the peppers so even your fussy spouse can enjoy them.

how do we get a stubborn doctor to drink his medicine?

being a doctor isn't easy, especially when you’re injured and your partner is more worried about your own health than you are.

“qiu’er, i’m back!” the sound of your voice instantly draws his attention, he turns his head in your direction, the subtle rustle of sheets accompanying his movement. the bed dips slightly under your weight as you settle beside him, the warmth of your presence soothing. “here, i brought you some tea,” you murmur. 

“careful, it’s hot.” you gently lift the cup to his lips, the steam rising and carrying with it the sweet, spiced scent of cinnamon —he immediately notices the strong overpowering smell right away.

ah… cinnamon? so you took his advice from years ago, but unfortunately a fox’s senses are sharper than most. 

his nose scrunches slightly as the liquid gently brushes against his lips. “spiked my tea with something, dearest?” you pause, setting the cup down with a soft clink. though just as you’re about to retort, his hand reaches out, searching for you with a gentle touch. his fingers graze your arm, then find your hand, which he clasps with a tender grip.

“cinnamon is excellent for masking strong odors and is even used to conceal the scent of poison... but you wouldn’t be so cruel to me, would you?” he remarks with a playful smile, though there’s an ironic edge to his words, given his current condition.

you let out an exasperated sigh, “you wouldn’t take your medicine, qiu’er. i never thought you’d be such a stubborn doctor.” 

he chuckles softly, the sound low and a little raspy. “stubborn? i prefer ‘selective.’” his grip on your hand tightening ever so slightly. “and i chose to have you as my doctor.” 

“if it means i get to be the one who takes care of you, then i’ll gladly accept that,” you reply, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. “now get some rest —doctor’s orders.” you help him settle back on the bed, careful not to accidentally press on his bandaged wounds, before gently pulling the sheets up to cover him.

you lean down to kiss the crown of his head, running your fingers through his hair in a soothing, rhythmic motion. “i’m only following your orders, baobei,” he mumbles softly, his words trailing off as he drifts into a peaceful sleep.

today the sun may blaze brightly in the sky, but its brilliance fades next to the warmth of your smile, a light that, though he may not be able to see, touches his heart more profoundly than the brightest day ever could.

how do we get a stubborn doctor to drink his medicine? easy. disguise it in a comforting cup of tea, masking the bitterness with cinnamon, so even he won’t notice until it’s too late. of course, your tricks never really fool him, but he lets you win anyway.

homeboy has been through so much

MASTERLIST.

[justaz]

arthur and all his knights know that merlin has magic (it’s a test leon sets up for each potential round table recruit, they follow merlin out while he’s doing magical things and leon falls behind for a bit to allow the potential recruit to find out merlin’s magic and then he rushes up all out of breath like “did i miss anything? :o” and if the potential recruit goes “nope! all good! he’s just gathering herbs :)” then leon tells arthur who allows them to sit at the round table) and arthur is secretly drafting a magic ban repeal along with all the laws of what kind of magic will be punishable by you know time in the dungeons, a fine, or banishment. merlin doesn’t know. the round table wants it to be a surprise.

anyway, some curse gets placed on camelot and they need a sorcerer and arthur + his knights watch gaius and merlin coming up with lies on the fly and cringing at how abysmal they are at lying and contemplating how they never found out sooner. gaius does the iconic line of “i have chosen a woman” as the sorcerer, or rather sorceress, to help them out. they have to hide their snickers at the look merlin sends him. uhh instead of the dolma this time tho, the potion turns him into a younger woman who merlin places the moniker of emrys upon.

merlin follows the knights out into the woods and starts his shenanigans. he conjures illusions of emrys to lead the knights all throughout the woods before transforming and meeting the illusion that led arthur astray. arthur is Staring bc hot damn is this sorceress hot- fuck its merlin…eh, merlin was always hot. it tracks he’d be hot as a woman. and she’s wearing purple! arthur always knew purple suited her. he expects emrys to be like dragoon or the dolma and be all sassy and witty but, well, she is witty! just…very, very flirtatious. arthur gets tongue tied at how touchy and seductive and alluring she is.

the other knights’ illusions lead them back together just without arthur and they’re chilling like “oh well, its merlin. he won’t hurt arthur”. emrys gives arthur the cure and brings him back to his knights who are surprised at the sudden appearance and draw their swords. emrys holds up her hands and smirks “i bring him unharmed,” then brings her fingers up to drag under arthur’s jaw, “can’t say much for being untouched.” she winks at arthur and waves her fingers at the knight, “see you around, arthur pendragon”

then she transforms back into merlin and appears behind the knights where lancelot gives him a Look to which he dutifully ignores. arthur asks where merlin is and the knights are like “he hasn’t returned” and merlin is like “hello?? yes i have?? i’m right here??” and the knights go “oh! there you are!! you were here the whole time!! i forgot :)” and merlin looks arthur up and down before teasing too much like emrys “got lucky with a sorceress, did you? imagine what your father would think” before turning and walking away leaving arthur. Hot. and. Bothered.

[thewisecheerio]

Elden Ring and Disability

Elden Ring is filled with disabled characters. What I love about the specific way that Elden Ring uses disability, though, is that there is almost always a lore-compliant accommodation provided to the disabled character. This world filled with magic doesn't erase disability, but rather finds magical and lore-compliant ways of accommodating it, much like Star Trek:

Here is some of the disability representation within Elden Ring.

First Generation Albinaurics

First generation albinaurics are synthetic humanoids. Their legs do not function normally, so they are unable to locomote by walking. In the worst cases where no accommodations are provided, we see them crawling to move. But we get two really cool examples of ways to accommodate this disability:

First, we have Latenna the Albinauric. Normally when you summon her as a spirit ash, she functions as a static archer due to the state of her legs. However, if you summon her near a wolf, she will climb onto the wolf and ride it around to avoid enemy attacks and even gains a new attack (freezing mist) with the help of her ride. This puts the onus on you, the player, to make sure that you summon her under accommodating circumstances if you want her to be able to move. And of course, you could also choose not to, accepting her disabled self as-is as a perfectly great battle companion.

You can see a video of the wolf companion in action here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=st6vGIpsHLs

Second, we have Commander Gaius. Gaius is also a first generation albinauric with non-functional legs. But you'd almost never know without reading his lore or looking closely at his model, because is accommodated. He rides his Battle Tank Boar into your fight and has absolutely no problem wiping the floor with your sorry ass.

In both cases, a support animal functioning as a mobility aid allows the first generation albinaurics to locomote.

Malenia, Blade of Miquella

Malenia is missing some limbs due to the Scarlet Rot infection she was cursed with at birth rotting. She is also blind due to the sickness taking her sight. However, Malenia is still able to fight you (and win and win and win and win and...). There are two accommodations at play, the first of which is canon and the second of which is a canon-compliant fanon.

The first is the prosthetics made by the Shaded Castle. Malenia's iconic blade is physically attached to her arm prosthetic, allowing her to wield it in battle regardless of the lack of (natural) limb.

Fun fact: this is based on a real, historical practice with armor where old armor was recycled into prosthetics! There was even a mercenary famed for using a prosthetic limb to hold his sword after an accident that damaged his arm. You can learn more here (timestamp 16:58): https://youtu.be/PJwNjOvn-Ow?t=1018

The second accommodation that allows Malenia to be battle-functional is the water in her battleground. Because she is blind, she can listen for the player character's movement in the water, responding in a Daredevil-esque way. This is probably helped by the fact that her blade instructor--the blind swordsman named in the Blue Dancer Charm--was also blind and likely taught her how to accommodate that disability.

Millicent

Like her mother Malenia, Millicent is also afflicted by the Scarlet Rot. We find her alone and largely non-functional in the Church of the Plague at the beginning of her questline, writhing in pain. We then bring her the Unalloyed Needle, which keeps the Scarlet Rot at bay, relieving pain and allowing her to travel once more. Toward the end of her questline, Millicent removes the needle, which brings the Rot back in full force and ends her life.

In this way, the Unalloyed Needle functions as a treatment regimen for a chronic illness. It does not cure her, but it keeps the illness in check well enough for her to function.

The fact that Millicent chooses to remove the needle at the end of her quest is Important! Disabled people aren't under any obligation to "meet their potential" or continue treatment because it is convenient for others; if they wish to stop their treatment—even to accept palliative care—that is their right. Anything less disrespects their bodily autonomy and choice to make their own decisions. The fact that we get this representation in Millicent, who actively chooses against continuing her treatment after a certain point, is Good and Important.

And of course, we also provide Millicent with a prosthetic from the Shaded Castle, same as her mother. Once properly accommodated in this way, she can fight by your side as an NPC summon.

Messmer the Impaler

A lot of people speculate that Messmer is blind. This is because his left eye is (as far as we know) permanently shut, while his right eye appears to be a grace-filled synthetic seal rather than an eyeball. It's entirely possible that the grace seal does allow vision, but there are a couple of reasons to consider why it might not:

1) When we first arrive, Messmer is sitting in the dark. You could interpret this as being a Sad, Broody, Wet Blanket (which he is), or you could interpret this as evidence that things like light and dark are of less consequence to him than to a sighted person. Or, you know, both. A Sad, Broody, Blind, Wet Blanket.

2) Shortly after he lights candles--probably for your benefit--he sends one of his snakes into your face. He is able to tell from what the snake sees that you are Tarnished and comments on it. We can tell this means he can see what the snake sees, because he would have to figure this out from looking at your eyes and only the snake is close enough to do so.

This suggests that the snakes function as a remote viewing aid, providing a sight accommodation. And yes, again you could choose to interpret the snakes as existing in addition to a sighted right eye, but it is still interesting to consider what they mean if they are simply Support Noodles.

Ranni and Melina

There is a syndrome in our world called Locked-In Syndrome, in which paralysis prevents the entire body from moving with (usually) the sole exception of the eyes. As a consequence, the disabled person is unable to affect the physical world without help due to an inability to physically interact with the world around them.

Ranni and Melina have a similar situation going on, but with different ways of dealing with it. They are both disembodied spirits, having lost their physical bodies.

Ranni chooses to deal with the problem by incarnating herself into a doll's body at least twice: once as the doll's body we spend most of her quest interacting with, and later as a tiny actual-doll-sized doll that the player can interact with. Essentially, she has given herself a prosthetic that allows her to interact with the physical world once more.

Meanwhile, Melina goes a different route. Rather than incarnate physically, Melina requests that the player character help her reach her goal--the foot of the Erdtree, and then the Forge. In this case, we provide the physical support necessary for Melina to interact with the world, much as support workers do for those unable to care for themselves.

Goldmask

Goldmask never speaks to us in words. Rather, he communicates largely via physical movements. Brother Corhyn, a pupil of Goldmask, refers to his master's communication as "the movement of his finger". When Goldmask stops his movements, Corhyn reacts with distress, "I'm a little shaken since the master ceased his movements." He then proceeds to translate what the movements meant up to that point for us.

The fact that Corhyn is distressed at the master's lack of further communication after his movements cease suggests that this is his *only* mode of communication with him.

This is entirely a canon-compliant headcanon, but I like to believe that this means Goldmask uses sign language that Corhyn is learning to interpret in order to communicate with him. Additionally, the fact that we cannot necessarily interpret it ourselves and must rely on Corhyn to translate means that Corhyn is also acting as a support worker by being Goldmask's translator.

And yes, I think this is largely to poke fun at the Gesture system in the game, but it's also fun disability representation!

This list isn't exhaustive. There are yet other characters that either are disabled or could be easily argued to be so, like Roderika (grief and/or PTSD, given a space to heal and process), Rennala (depression and/or grief, NOT accommodated AFAICT), and Hyetta (blind, accommodated with...uh..."treatments"). But the fact that this post is already over 1400 words and has yet to touch upon all of the disability representation in the game just shows you how much there is.

[zukoromantic]

I REALLY LOVE HIM SO MUCH TYSM AGAIN MY LOVEEEEEEEE FOR THE GIFT ><<<< I LOVE YOU SO MUCH💕💕❤️! HE LOOKS SO GOODDD!!!! 🥰💚

Celebratory request for @zukoromantic !!!

Mii requested Battamonda in Catra's season 4 outfit and djdjjsks love, your minddddd!!!!

[snailmail444]

Can I get a headcanon of the bachelors and how they'd be sexy with you when you're down? Like, if they're trying to cheer you up and be a little goofy with it but also tryna HIT. THAT. 🤣🤣🤣

Thanks Snail, ILU.

Bachelors Goofing Their way Into Your Pants

18+ 🌱 MDNI 🌱 NSFW (-ish)

This one was a tough ask Libby but I’ll do nothing if not stand and deliver 🫡 Honestly might be my favorite head cannon list for the bachelors I’ve ever done so THANK YOU for this prompt icon. NSFW? -ish under the cut (lewd?? Idk lol)

Harvey-

💚 Perhaps the goofiest about this

💚 He would not try to come onto you when you’re down unless he KNOWS it’s going to pick you up

💚 So once he’s confident let’s start there

💚 It’s a song and dance

💚 Dissappears, and when he’s back he’s got his med kit

💚 He gets out the stethoscope and all. The whole nine yards.

💚 That’s right folks. We’re paging Dr. Love

💚 Will NOT let you stop this routine. Dr. Love WILL be completing the full assessment. Listening to your heart rate, checking your throat and ears, somehow always having to complete a chest exam

💚 (M or F he will be groping your tits for this one)

💚 The diagnosis is in

💚 There’s Only One Cure for What Ails You

💚 You guessed it! You need a little lovin’ (Dr. Love’s catchphrase)

💚 Important note: Dr. Love is not a licensed medical practitioner

💚 This works a little too well perhaps. He’s so confident for no reason at all LMAO

💚 Lowkey want to write a Dr. Love oneshot now because this is really fun and cute

Elliott-

❤️ If you’re feeling down man will preform the absolute worst ad lib poetry

❤️ Silliest lymrics you’ve ever heard

❤️ Dumb dumb dummmmmb

❤️ Very dirty and stupid bad poems about you

❤️ Specifically about his favorite parts of your body

❤️ Or his favorite things you do during sex

❤️ The worse it is, the better as far as he is concerned

❤️ Raunchy dirty filthy

❤️ But like. In the most grade school mother goose style he can manage

❤️ No flowery language here

❤️ Takes off your clothes to expose the parts of you the he’s referring to

❤️ When you do x thing (then tries to make you do x thing)

❤️ Will be proving his point. Period!!!

Alex-

🤎 Physical touch legend

🤎 Wrestles

🤎 Winner gets whatever they want from the loser

🤎 Has a wrestling name and all

🤎 Does the John Cena theme

🤎 His hands end up in all sorts of places that they don’t need to be

🤎 Most wrestlers aren’t grabbing ass 🤨

🤎 Gets you in some really tight, close pins, but somehow you end up winning anyway

🤎 No I didn’t let you win don’t be ridiculous I respect the sport too much to ever—

🤎 He let you win

🤎 You can take your prize now 😌 Whatever you want 😌

🤎 And if his hard on is pressing against you? Well. Maybe he has some ideas about what your prize should be

Shane-

💙 Gets you through the hard stuff first, so once you’re on the mend he’s goofing to the max

💙 KING FLEXER!

💙 Aw babe come on? How can you be so sad when you have these guns to look at?

💙 Runs through a series of absurd poses to show off his muscly farm boy arms

💙 Lays it on really thick about being a stud

💙 “No matter what at the end of the day you have a trophy husband” (even if he’s not married to you. ESPECIALLY if he’s not married to you)

💙 STRIP! TEASE!!

💙 Showing off everything you’re so lucky to have with a big goofy grin on his face

💙 Throwing his clothes across the room and everything

💙 Making the music sounds with his mouth

💙 You HAVE to whistle or hoot at him or clap or something

💙 He demands applause from his audience if he’s not getting some singles at least

Sam-

🩷 Another song and dancer

🩷 This man was born for the stage I fear

🩷 Genuinely and truly putting on a SHOW about it all

🩷 The drama of it. Uh oh, he’s compromised!

🩷 Will end up ‘stuck’ under the couch or table or anywhere else

🩷 Uh oh! I hope nobody takes advantage of me 👀 When I’m so exposed 👀👀 and vulnerable 👀👀���

🩷 The worst stage acting you’ve ever seen in your life

🩷 Starts stripping in the middle of the living room because he “didn’t see you there!”

🩷 Pretends to be scandalized when you finally succumb to his advances

🩷 What are you doing?! Huh? What do you MEAN I was coming on to you? I always take off all my clothes in the kitchen, that’s ritual

🩷 insists he’s been objectified and taken advantage of

🩷 That kind of turns him on though let’s be so fucking real

Sebastian-

🖤 Okay so we’re going blunt king here

🖤 Two possible options

🖤 Uses it as a way to hard reset the system mid breakdown

🖤 Full crying, upset, whatever, he’s been holding you and trying to calm you down but it’s not working

🖤 “Wanna have sex?”

🖤 DEADPANNNNNN delivery

🖤 It never fails. Tried and true

🖤 Option two?

🖤 This is ONLY if mans is super comfortable in your dynamic

🖤 A classic

🖤 Whips it out

🖤 Thinking about that one tweet of the boyfriend who was in the mood and just put his dick on her shoulder while she was watching tv

🖤 Like that but buried under sixteen levels of irony

🖤 “I know what’ll help” and then he pulls his dick out

🖤 Probably the least likely to actually hit with these methods

🖤 However, he’s maybe the most likely to help improve your mood substantially

🖤 Through sheer presentation if nothing else. Man can deliver, and knows when to hit with the absurd to make it the most impactful

[tarjapearce]

Iridiscent

PirateAU! Miguel x Mermaid! Reader

Thanks to @sarapaprikas-blog for the idea ❤️✨. Been loving to experience with different AU'S lately ✨. Hope you like!

Warnings: Mild angst and historical figure mentions, implied mysticism ~

Prologue ✨

Pt. 2

As far as history was told, the sea had been the biggest grave in the world. Countless men, nations and civilizations perished under the might of the ever infinite sea. Not many dared to venture, after all, the stories of countless ships sunk under behemoth waves reached through all dry land known.

But that didn't stop the greatest empires to expand and colonize newly discovered lands thanks to years of observation. Many thought of the sea a living being, a being that could be tamed or at least controlled enough to small civilizations to be born in lands people only dreamed of.

However, as the sea earned it's title of a living creature, the mysticism around it grew. Many believed the sea was a she, and bringing a woman on board only made her jealous. A common belief among outcasts and pirates. Something that was debunked as the golden age of piracy advanced.

But even so, the word spread around was that the sea favored female pirates better than men. Lagertha, Mary Read, Anne Bonnie, Zheng Shi, Grace O'Malley, to name a few of the most iconic pirates that against all, conquered, navigated, commanded and plundered at their contempt.

Many believed that they had done a pact with the devil himself, but others strongly believed that there were creatures below that left no trace once the women settled for a target. Mermaids.

Creatures often described as the beauty of death itself embodied. Beautiful women luring men to their inevitable deaths. Something, that some men longed for, and feared by others. The rumor was that if you caught a mermaid alive, the creature was bound to grant you a wish.

But for Miguel, they were nothing but myths and lies. A once young and naive self had ventured in the sea to find one, so he could cure his daughter once the land medics had abandoned all hope. And so he did, once his little girl had closed her twinkling innocent eyes, full of dreams, forever.

He was a changed man after that. He didn't allow his men to talk about such nonsensical things in his ship, Reina Gabriela, and poor of the man that was caught red handed. Reason had gotten him where he was, a feared outlaw among the Spaniards and English folk alike. Not by his overall intimidating looks, but the ruthless and cunning of his attacks.

The Red Eyed Demon, they called him.

------

Miguel had settled the route towards an island that promised a proper restock of his resources. He would let his men unwind, he'd probably spend the night away with a well prepared courtesan. The type of woman that knew how to entertain him beyond the physical ways, once they were on land.

By sunset, he would be landing. The island itself wasn't a problem, the inhabitants of it were. At least for him, full of highly superstitious people, that were always showering him in foul smelling concoctions, lung itching fumes and heavy charms of protection to "cleanse the spirit of anything that could drag you and your ship down".

Isla del Sol, or Sunny Island as many called it, was like a secret hideway-paradise for Pirates that stopped by to rest. Opposite from what the Spaniards and English believed, the Island was run under the command of a council of five.

A retired English commander that did better as a pirate than a law enforcer named Edward, A Spaniard pirate well versed in the arts of administration named Xavier, A jamaican man which eloquence only rivaled the Queen's erudites themselves named Toussaint, An asian woman trained in the arts of killing and weaponry named Sheng Hyun, and a white haired chaman whose wisdom was often seeked by the rest.

So far the island had worked and thrived under their command. They had even asked Miguel to join them, because of his strategic and cunning mind. But of course, he refused. A man like him wasn't easily bound to bureaucratics, even though, ironically he had strict rules in his ship.

His men were loyal, after all, Miguel took proper care of his crew. Well fed, healthy, well armed, and now, well rested. Reina Gabriela approached the docks and soon the men worked. Some put the extended sails away, others put the weaponry in their place, others cleaned and so on. Everyone had a role aboard, and Miguel made sure for them to accomplish it.

He threw a small pouch of gold to a nearby man to watch over his ship as he was out. The island felt like another city, but difference was, that inside land there were no guards, no laws that didn't benefit them. And if anyone caused a ruckus, Sheng Hyun was sent to deal with it, personally.

His men scattered around, except for the quarter master, the cook, weaponry master, Navy Engineer and doctor. They discussed briefly the upgrades for the ship, new dishes to the menu, and new places to get weapons, medicines and sturdier woods from. He dismissed them once everyone had their list, then he was alone.

His feet took him nearby the merchants as they exposed their goods to everyone passing by. Guards uniforms, royal weapons and wax seals perfect for an unsuspecting ruse, medicines, a new type of powder that was a bit more waterproof, Chinese explosives, sedating darts, portraits of naked royal women, some gemstones, and of course, luck charms and talismans.

He scoffed as his eyes rolled at the various trinkets. He had to admit that whoever came with these ideas had found a gold mine that relied in people's blind faith, probably would shake their hand if he ever knew who it was. One trinket stood out from the rest.

It was an iridescent pearl, a quarter size of his palm, along some black and pearly scales protuding ontop. There was no chain around it to be worn, the merchant noticed him staring at the trinket and smiled.

"Good if y'wanna catch a mermaid. They love shiny things."

Miguel looked at him with an eyebrow quirked and a skeptical look.

"You seem confident enough to sell these... crafts."

"Ah, another nonbeliever. Tis'fine mate. I've dealt with so many like you before. Mostly of the non believing part roots from something denied to you in the past. Am'i'rite?"

Miguel's jaw clenched softly at the boldness of the man. He looked like the typical merchant with shady business on the side.

"Leave this man alone, Joseph." The chaman of the council spoke behind Miguel as she took the pearl in her old, wrinkled hands.

"Come" He motioned Miguel to follow. Despite being a highly spiritual woman, the council's chaman did not pressure him into believing, but rather spoke to him sometimes in riddles. Riddles that he grew tired of eventually. He followed.

"A surprise to find you watching these sort of trinkets, Miguel."

"Hard to not when they get stranger and colorful each time I come here."

The elder lady hooked her arm on his as she supported on Miguel, that secured her as he walked next to her.

"I'd be grateful if you wouldn't speak about anything mystic tonight."

"Wasn't my intention, boy. But I must say, you've got quite the eye for these things. It's a real pearl, if you wish to sell it."

Miguel kept walking, being led by the chaman.

"Or I could gift it to a mermaid" Miguel chuckled and the lady looked at him with curious eyes.

"Well, to do such thing, you'd have to find one first."

"I won't, cause they're not real."

The chaman smiled smugly at him.

"What would you do if your homeland got infested with rotting bodies, blood and so many other unpleasant things continuously?"

"I'd look for a new home." he humored, but the lady only nodded in approval.

"And what kind of home you'd look for?"

"One that wasn't near the cities or civilization. Probably a secret manantial or even a virgin island"

The lady smiled

"Congratulations, Miguel. You now have the first lead into finding a mermaid."

"You can't expect me to believe such things."

"No lo espero, pero sé que tu curiosidad por dichas criaturas ha aumentado. ¿Qué es lo deseas tener?" (I don't, but I know for sure that your curiosity for such creatures have peaked your interest. What is it you long for?)

Miguel looked down at the lady, wistfully and she rubbed his arm comfortingly. Like a grandma would.

"My dear. Mystical creatures can only do so much, Miguel. Sadly, bringing back the dead isn't something they can do."

"No sabes de lo que hablas. No me conoces" (You don't know what you are talking about. You don't know me)

He seethed the last words as his grip abandoned the lady. His body tensed when the chaman reached out again to take his large hand.

"Loss is part of our lives, Miguel" Her wrinkled hands put the pearl in his hand, hers covered his warmly, pushing the trinket further in his hands, "And we all move on eventually. Life is full of wonders, and who knows, maybe what you find ahead in your path is exactly what you need"

He nearly growled as another riddle was added to the list.

"Te dije que te dejaras de-" (Thought I told you to quit the-)

His mouth gaped slightly, the lady was gone. He was left alone with the pearl in his hand, "Acertijos..." (Riddles...) he sighed and stared at the pearl, to then tuck it back on his pocket.

What was he longed for?

[m30wk1ttycat]

kiss me hard before you go

pairing: crank!newt x gn!reader

tw: kissing, use of y/n, mentions of death

note: title is a reference to lana del rey's iconic summertime sadness. this is kinda short, sorry.

you knew he didn't have much time. he knew it, too. but he wasn't scared - not of dying at least.

for a while, you were blisfully unaware of the fact that he had the flare. sure, he yelled at anyone who was too close to him, refused to let anyone see the injury he got when you were driving to the last city, snapped at everyone - yeah, now that you put it like that, it might've been pretty obvious, but you didn't pick up on it at the time. you found out when thomas accidentaly slipped up.

"tommy, what do you mean 'he doesn't have much time'??" you questioned.

he backed away slightly, hands shoved in his pockets. "i said we. we don't have much time," he insisted.

"thomas, i know what i heard, don't lie to me, for fuck's sake," you snapped. "you can't just say that and tell me that i misheard you!"

"i, um- well," he stuttered, taking a few steps back. he waved his arms around, gesturing. "i have to go.. um, talk to him? see ya!! and sorry, really. g'night!"

you watched him turn around, and leave the room, the door shutting behind his back. without much of a choice, you talked to newt that night. if thomas wasn't going to tell you, he definitely was, you hoped.

and he did.

"when were you going to tell me?" you asked, tears brimming in your eyes. he chewed on his lip in contemplation, unsure if he really wanted to asnwer - let's be real, he didn't.

he did, anyways.

"i didn't want to tell you," he confessed. "the plan was to tell you that i died during the mission. shot. burnt alive. something, anything."

"the same mission you're going on.. tomorrow?"

"yes," he confirmed. he fiddled with his thumbs and looked away, unable to look you in the eye. "i'm sorry."

you swallowed, harshly.

"i didn't want you to worry," he continued, "i'm sorry. so, so sorry. you weren't supposed to find out."

"do the others know?" you saw him stiffen. "do they?" you repeated. "newt?"

"i'm sorry" was all he said. slowly, the tears in your eyes slowly slipped down your cheeks. newt's calloused fingers quickly wiped them and he hugged you as an attempt to comfort you - it only made you cry harder.

"it's not fair," you sobbed.

he pressed a kiss to your temple and rocked you back and forth gently. "i know, love. i know."

"how are you so calm about this?"

"death doesn't scare me," he explained, sounding much too casual to be talking about this. "i'd much rather die than turn crazy. i don't want to lose my mind and try to kill my friends. i can't have that. that's the only thing that scares me about the flare - becoming someone who i'm not. i don't want that, even if the only solution is death."

"or a cure. we can always find you a cure, you know?" you said, trying to remain optimistic. there was no cure, though - you both knew that. but you just had to hope, right? maybe, just maybe, there was one.

"of course," he agreed, though unconvincingly. lifting your head up, you kissed him. one last kiss before he had to leave for the mission to save minho. one last kiss before he was gone. with your lips connected, you could both taste the salty tears - both yours and newt's.

he pulled away.

"i love you. remember that, okay? i love you, and i always will."

"i love you, too."

[wileys-russo]

toilet paper party II a.russo x reader

some tooth rotting gf lessi fluff to try and cure all of our post game depression, with a dash of supportive best friend and arsenal icon lotte wubben-moy ofc

toilet paper party II a.russo x reader

"-she's going to blame herself again, it's like the world cup all over again." you sighed quietly to lotte who was sat beside you on the bench, both of you wincing as the ball was smacked away and saved as alessia kicked it, and unfortunately it of course had to be the deciding penalty.

"but she doesn't need to, she kept us in the game she-" lotte tried to justify but with a look from you she fell silent, nodding in agreement. the two of you knew alessia well enough to know that though she shouldn't blame herself, she already would be.

"come on, time to start damage control." lotte sighed tiredly, slinging an arm over your shoulder as the two of you joined the team for the thank you lap and clap.

as much as you wanted to rush right to your girlfriends side to comfort her, crushing defeat already plastered on her face, you knew she needed some time and space. you also knew that you needed to give the rest of the team the opportunity to build up their own relationships with the blonde, and consoling her after a loss though never pleasant was a way for bonds to strengthen.

sure enough katie and lia were quickly plastered tightly to alessia's sides, lia squeezing her shoulder comfortingly as katie was gripping onto the younger girls hands tightly as she talked at her.

you weren't close enough to hear what was being said but you'd known the irishwoman long enough to know she would be doing her very best to remind alessia of all that she achieved this game rather than the one thing she missed.

it made your heart soar to see one half of your life mold with the other so successfully.

both you and alessia had been incredibly nervous for how the team would take the two of you dating when she was signed, with only a handful of them you were the closest to knowing about it prior to the announcement of her signing.

however besides the relentless teasing and jokes about how obviously smitten you were with one another, it had been smooth sailing and your favorite blonde had been welcomed into the team with hugs, grins and open arms.

you'd both of course made a pact about how you'd interact and communicate with one another around the team in professional environments, this was your job and a workplace after all. though as said you were smitten with one another, so some days you were a little less strict about this than others.

it wasn't until you were all in the change rooms after the loss that you finally had the chance to be with alessia, a lot of the team and coaching staff having pulled her aside to try and build her back up. affirming she had nothing to feel bad over, keeping you feeling grateful that your second family had her best interests at heart.

even jonas had taken her one on one and provided some well intended feedback about ways she could approach things a little different next time, and reminded her firmly that penalties were the worst way to decide a game, she had nothing to be sorry or beat herself up for.

after all the majority of the girls, yourself and your girlfriend included, had played in the world cup just over a month ago. and without a pre season there was still a lot of work to be put in before you'd all be up and running as one cohesive unit, and now at least you had the time to focus on that if you had to draw one positive from all of this.

however the break of time in between the final whistle and the team huddle to now the change room debrief had given you and lotte some valuable time to brainstorm ways you could try to cheer the blonde up, and you almost had a plan in motion.

half the girls had already filed out of the room and headed for the bus, or were spending a little time talking to the dwindling group of fans waiting eagerly by the exit, you all had around forty minutes until you were scheduled to depart.

you didn't say anything as you sat beside your girlfriend on the bench by her locker, the striker clearly lost in her own thoughts as she jumped slightly when she felt your warm hand land gently on her knee.

still nothing needed to be said as your eyes softened and hers conveyed utter defeat and exhaustion, long blonde hair slightly damp from the quick shower she'd taken in an attempt to wash away the immense guilt wracking her body.

your lips curled into a half smile seeing she'd tugged on your travel hoodie, having stolen it out of your kit bag as you were side tracked whispering away in the halls outside with lotte.

your smile only widened when your girlfriend wordlessly dropped her travel shirt and hoodie in your lap for you to put on later, the blondes head coming to slump on your shoulder as her long arms wrapped lazily around your torso.

you grabbed one of her hands with yours, intertwining your fingers and lovingly brushing your thumb against her knuckles. your other hand rubbed circles into the small of her back and you felt her body heave a long and tired exhale as she crumpled into you.

"i'm really proud of you lessi, i hope you know that." you whispered to her quietly, sharing a small smile with katie and jen as they walked past the two of you, the older girls looking on somewhat proudly seeing your girlfriend curled into your side as you were obviously trying to comfort her.

though it also must have looked quite awkward given the striker was a good foot or two taller than you, and you knew if she stayed in this position for too long she'd be rewarded with a stiff neck and back tomorrow.

"my golden goal scoring girl." you mumbled sincerely, the blonde squeezing your intertwined hands in a silent thank you before pulling herself up. "have a quick shower and i'll meet you on the bus tesoro." the italian nodded behind her to the showers before pressing a short but sweet kiss to your lips, grabbing her belongings and heading out of the change room with lotte.

~

showered and changed you felt an immediate and immense sense of calm settle over you as you clutched at the red material and inhaled deeply, senses drowned in the comforting aroma of your girlfriend.

sweet notes of lavender and bergamont from her favorite body mist that was used every game day, as well as the more subtle hints of green apple and roses from her shampoo. due to your height difference your body was swallowed in your girls shirt and hoodie, but you never minded.

given that for the majority of your relationship you'd been doing distance in some way with playing for different clubs, only really having proper quality time in the off season or during national camps. the ease and comfort of stealing one anothers clothes had become tradition, and it felt like a warm hug from the taller girl anytime you wore something that you knew was hers.

noticing you were one of the last to leave you hurried to collect and pack your belongings, tripping over caitlin's boots she'd left behind you grabbed them with a roll of your eyes and headed out of the stadium.

you took a few quick pictures and flashed a pearly white smile with a soft thank you to the last few fans hanging around before ascending the steps of the bus.

you couldn't help but laugh quietly at the scenes before you. beth was as usual on her karaoke machine, clearly trying to up everyone's moods by belting out an incredibly tone deaf version of river deep mountain high as she danced her way up and down the aisles.

some of the team were clapping along in encouragement while others had headphones on and were tucked away in their own world, clearly reflecting on the match that had been and what it now meant for you all as a team.

though beth seemed to respect this and only engaged with those who seemed willing participants of her chaos.

"you'd forget your head if it wasn't attached to your body foordy." you teased the australian as you offered up her boots, the girls eyes widening as katie cackled beside her and she elbowed the irish woman before accepting the boots, stating over and over that she owed you one which you playfully affirmed you'd not forget.

the smile remained on your face as you spotted alessia halfway down the bus, sat in front of lotte and across from viccy and cloe. the striker was chatting away to the small group with a much more relaxed demeanor, small smile on her face as she seemed in decent spirits.

her features brightened as she noticed you making your way toward her, of course wearing her hoodie.

"i didn't know we were allowed to change our numbers y/l/n? 23 now are you?" viccy teased, instantly noticing you were wearing your girlfriends clothes as you flipped her off, shuffling past alessia and dropping down into the vacant window seat beside her.

"my favorite 23." alessia turned her head and murmured quietly with a smile, kissing your cheek fondly as she tugged your legs to drape over hers.

"whose wearing my missing shoes too it would seem." she shot you a knowing look as admittedly you might have previously lied about not knowing the whereabouts to the adidas trainers, which were a favorite pair of the blonde.

"good news, i found them!" you smiled innocently, head thumping back gently against the window as you turned your body more to the side to get comfortable.

a few more minutes of chatter among you all and everyone had boarded, beth finally ceasing her verbal abuse to your ears in the form of her singing, instead joining lia, gio, frida and lina in a heated game of blackjack.

the engine roaring to life the bus was to take you back to the hotel where you'd all pack and have dinner together before heading off to germany tonight on a late night flight.

"can i ask a stupid question?" you asked your girlfriend quietly once everyone else had settled and she nodded, her attention now focused back solely on you as she absentmindedly traced shapes on your bare legs which laid in her lap, goosebumps arising along your tanned skin at her gentle touch.

"how are you feeling baby?" you asked somewhat cautiously, knowing it was stupid considering the loss you'd all just taken. "can i get back to you on that a little bit later love?" alessia replied with a somewhat pained smile as you nodded reassuringly, a comfortable silence falling between the two of you as she offered you one of her airpods.

you both busied yourself making a shared playlist for the flight later tonight, already having chosen to sit next to one another as you'd opted to sit with other team mates on the flight to sweden, and given the late time of night you both knew you'd likely want to sleep during the journey.

you glanced down to your phone in your lap as lotte sent you an influx of messages, confirming everything seemed to be moving along well for your little plan to lift alessia's spirits even more.

you poked your head over the top of your seat and gave her a thumbs up when your girlfriend wasn't looking, and before you knew it the bus had pulled into the hotel.

you both took your time getting off, allowing those who were in a rush to hurry forth as you dawdled, chatting with lia as the older girl dropped down into the seat in front of the two of you.

but once you were finally all off and had grabbed your belongings, the plan begun to come into affect.

"hey russo! come play a few rounds of cards in our room." katie called from a few feet away once you strode into the hotel lobby, an offer which though was sincere, was also set up by you and lotte to give the two of you a little alone time.

"come on, i heard the united girls had some sort of a poker cult going. let's see what you're made of then!" the irish woman grinned teasingly at the striker who hesitated and glanced toward you by her side.

"go on baby, she needs the humbling." you encouraged softly, poking her sides as she nodded with a soft smile, kissing your cheek and hurrying off after katie who subtly gave you a thumbs up behind the strikers back before disappearing into the elevator.

"we'll do it in my room in case she comes to yours looking for you, katie just said she'll try to keep her occupied for about a half hour or so. then we have a few hours till dinner!" lotte recounted as you nodded along and the two of you headed up toward her and alessia's shared room.

again with it being both of your first away games you and your girlfriend had opted not to room with one another, again giving her the chance to bond a little more with the team and not flaunt your shared relationship in everyone's face.

"okay, operation toilet paper party is a go." "lots that is not the name we agreed upon." "maybe, but you have to admit operation cheer up lessi just doesn't have the same catchy ring to it." "whatever you say wubben-moy."

~

it was down to the wire but the two of you just managed to pull it off, giving a satisfied nod at your efforts as katie messaged to say alessia was on her way back to her room as you'd planned, jen informing her that you were doing some media before dinner to assure she didn't head to yours looking for you.

"ready?" lotte mouthed and you nodded as you both watched the light click from red to green as alessia swiped her card in the door, pushing it open.

"congratulations lessi!" you and lotte both yelled loudly with a cheer, alessia jumping and clutching at her chest in shock from the sudden unexpected fright.

though once the messy hastily cut up homemade confetti came raining down upon her, her face morphed into a slightly confused smile, which only widened seeing the rushed half hazard toilet paper hung around the room as makeshift streamers.

"what is all this?" alessia asked with a small laugh of surprise.

"it's a toil-" lotte started as you elbowed her sharply with a firm look. "it's for you. a congratulations you scored your first goal for arsenal and are currently the leading goal scorer of the team with two epic goals that kept us in the game party!" you rambled out in one breath.

"i tried telling her the name was too long, but we both know how stubborn she is." lotte sighed dramatically with an eye roll making alessia laugh. "hey!" you frowned in offence, shoving the taller bruntte lightly.

"but regardless, congratulations!" you and lotte gave another cheer, throwing your other handfuls of confetti though with yours was done with poor aim as it landed in the blondes face.

"sorry." you whispered with an apologetic wince, taking a step forward and plucking off a few stray pieces of confetti which had stuck to mouth.

"guys." alessia breathed out, biting her bottom lip as a few tears welled up in her bright baby blue eyes. "hey don't cry! this is a happy moment, something to celebrate. that second goal was a worldie less." lotte assured with a soft smile.

"yeah baby you crushed it. and its only our second game! the droughts been broken and the flood gates are open and you're going to be a goal scoring machine." you affirmed, lotte nodding along in eager agreement.

"a force to be reckoned with!" "the italian stallion." "the russonator!" "the golden boot goddess." "taking names and kicking goals!"

your girlfriend let out a half sob half laugh at the assortment of nicknames, reaching out to the both of you for a hug which you both gladly allowed her to pull you into, lotte rubbing her back as you kissed her cheek.

"you're both the best. thank you!" alessia smiled, clearly overwhelmed with emotion as you reached up to tenderly wipe away her tears with the sleeve of your hoodie, making lotte aww as you rolled your eyes.

"oh and we have snacks! because what toilet paper party doesn't have snacks." lotte remembered, gesturing to the somewhat strange assortment of food laid out on the coffee table.

"lotte that is not the name we agreed on!" you huffed with a frown at her words, alessia tugging you into her and kissing the side of your head affectionately with a quiet laugh, mumbling how much she loved you in your ear.

"we don't technically know what most of it is. stina sort of went door to door collecting for us from everyones mini bar, and she said they all taste good!" lotte shrugged, rubbing the back of her neck as you all surveyed the swedish treats in front of you.

"we have a couple hours before dinner to snack, we have pitch perfect loaded and we grabbed extra pillows from reception so we can be extra comfy." you explained, alessia crumbling internally at how much obvious thought and care had been put into this.

"correction she stole some extra pillows from reception." lotte teased as you stuck your tongue out and the girl excused herself to use the bathroom, encouraging you both settle in and begin the movie.

"well hi." you mumbled against alessia's lips with a laugh as the striker pulled you into a searing kiss the moment lotte closed the bathroom door. "babe!" you laughed again as she easily picked you up, wrapping your legs around her waist as she bear hugged you as tight as she possibly could.

"i love you so very much lessi baby, you're amazing. you know that right?" you cupped her face and pressed your forehead to hers, reaching out to gently swipe away a loose tear which carved its way down her cheek.

"i can't-baby i don't know what to say." alessia managed to stammer out, still overcome with a waterfall of emotions. "you don't have to say anything, i just want you to feel supported and appreciated. without you coming on and changing the game we wouldn't have even stood a chance yeah? you alessia mia teresa russo are brilliant."

"god i'm so fucking in love with you." the blonde breathed out, eyes burning with a loving passion, the taller girl admiring you as if it was the first time she'd ever laid eyes on you.

"aw i love you both too!" lotte clapped sarcastically, throwing a pillow at the two of you with a groan and collapsing onto the bed as alessia placed you back down on your feet.

the two of you soon joined her, opening some of the swedish snacks as lotte clicked play on the movie.

"cheers to a successful toilet paper party!" "lotte for the one hundreth time that is not what we agreed on calling it!" "hey i don't know amore mio it is the first toilet paper party i've ever been to but it seems successful." "alessia! don't encourage her, whose side are you on?" "best toilet paper party ever!" "i simply cannot stand either of you."

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Salt Mushroom

Debut: Super Mario Galaxy 3

Everybody remembers when Super Mario Galaxy 3 launched worldwide for the Wii's immensely popular successor, the Nintendo Wii Too, blowing all of our collective minds with its flawless combination of the inviting and memorable atmosphere of the first entry in the series with the incredible 3D platforming of its immediate predecessor. But let's be honest, we've all seen Super Mario Galaxy 3 at the top of enough "Greatest Games of All Time" listicles by now. Today we're going to take a much more focused look at just one element which helped to make Galaxy 3 one of the greatest 3D platformers of all time, and one which hardly warrants such a lengthy introduction: the Salt Mushroom!

This item first appears somewhat late in the game, in the Briny Mine Galaxy mission Salt Mario Finds the Cure. You land on a small planetoid with some Gearmos who explain to you that the mine's been overrun with weird monsters! With a boost from a Launch Star, you propel yourself into a pipe, which takes you straight into the depths of the Briny Mine itself.

Sure enough, there's weird monsters all over the place! Excargot, to be precise! These heavily armored, tank-treaded snail creatures try to charge at Mario, leaving trails of slippery slime everywhere! But jump out of the way, and they'll go flying into the wall, causing the shell-like armor on their backs to shutter open, exposing the slimy pink skin inside. What's that? Why haven't I included an image of Excargot, an extraordinarily weird Mario enemy? Well, I mean, we've all seen it. It would be pretty redundant to show a picture, then, wouldn't it? Hm? Now you want to know why I've explained everything in such gratuitous detail thus far? I think you need to keep your voice down.

Anyway, if you try to attack this glaring weak spot with a stomp or a spin, Mario simply bounces off! Clearly, a power-up is in order. Collect the nearby ? Coin to summon the Salt Mushroom, and collect it to become...

Salt Mario!!! With his newfound powers of star-spin-propelled salt-flinging, Mario can handily defeat the Excargot, and even walk with ease across their slime (and even across ice later on in the ever-iconic Slick Street Galaxy). But that's not all! The more time Mario spends as Salt Mario, the more his Hydration Meter decreases! His movement gradually becomes more sluggish, his jump height becoming shorter and weaker, all the while delivering his voice lines with that trademark Salt Mario hoarseness, and loudly rasping his parched lips when left idle, desperately pleading for water.

Of course, we all know that there is no water anywhere in the two levels where the Salt Mushroom is found, and we all know the grisly fate that awaits our plucky plumber when his Hydration Meter finally runs out. We've all seen it! Dozens of times! Hundreds, even! I think I speak for everyone when I say I could watch it happen forever and ever, and never stop laughing!

Needless to say, Salt Mario was a huge hit with fans, and Miyamoto has even cited the Salt Mushroom as his all-time favorite power-up. Some could say the Salt Mushroom has eclipsed even Mario himself in popularity, and many consider it to be the new face of the franchise! I mean, it's a hard claim to deny when we're three entries deep in the Salt Mushroom Rally series (yes, I'm counting Salt Mushroom Rally: Alkaline Abscondence as a discrete title from Salt Mushroom Rally: Alkaline Abscondence Deluxe, I'm not arguing with you about this). And with that, much like Mario's Hydration Meter, my material has finally run dry. You know what Mario would say in this situation? Of course you do! Say it with me, everybody! "HHHHHKKH, KHKKHHHHHHHHH, HHHHKKKKHKK!!!"