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#You are never going to successfully address a lack of self worth by going
boypussydilf · 1 year
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these youtube comments are NOT the only place ive seen sentiments like this WHAT are you guys talking about. “simon feels like he’s worthless without magic. so give him magic again :)” This is like putting a hello kitty bandaid on a neck wound that is nearly severing your head. that’s not going to help anything at all. that is not the solution and that is not where this is going. like, things that Happened To Him are part of the cause for why he is so fucked up, but ultimately The Problems Are Coming From Inside The Simon. as badly as he does not want to he is just going to have to learn how to exist As Simon, out-of-place human mundanity and all
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worstloki · 4 years
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please read the article 'How White Fandom is Colonizing "Character-Coding"' by Shafira Jordan and quit while you're ahead
Okay, so I read it and see the problem, and I’ll try to address all their points in order because I don’t wholly agree with the article. I know it’s a lot to read so I’ve put tldr; sections at the end of each :)
Misusing the Term Reinforces Negative Stereotypes for Marginalized People 
The article essentially argues that labeling characters which are villainous as POC-coded is bad because they’re not morally pure and doing so "reinforces the idea that people of color are naturally dangerous and not to be trusted.”
Which is fair as you don’t want all the representation to be of ‘bad’ characters, but I also don’t believe all representative characters have to be ‘good’ either as it would be equally racist to divide good/bad in such a way. Not that I would place Loki under ‘bad’ to begin with, but arguing that characters shouldn’t be labelled as POC-coded for reasons unrelated to what’s presented in the narrative or because they did bad things is :/ even if lack of good representation is a prevalent issue in current Western and influenced media. 
Ideally there should be a range of representative characters that fall into ‘good’, ‘bad’, and ‘anywhere in-between’ because variety and complexity in character types should, in theory, be treated as common practice (which can only happen with a multitude of representation!).
And a bit unrelated but... within the fictional context of Thor 1, all the Jotnar (sans Loki) are presented to the audience as ‘bad’ by default. They desperately want to get their Casket back to the point of attempting stealing it (from the ‘good’ characters), they fight the heroes and even when the gang and Thor (’good’ characters) are enjoying or going overboard with taking lives it’s inconsequential, Laufey wants to kill the opposing king (who just happens to be a ‘good’ character) and will resort to low-handed methods to do so, etc. The narrative itself is from the frame of reference of the ‘good’ and we only see warriors of Jotunheim though so we understand why it’s like this, because regardless of their race/experiences the narrative carries, even if it most definitely would be seen as racist from our real-life perspectives if the ‘monstrous’ race were presented by actual people of colour, even if it would make sense for the people on on different realms living in different environments to be different from each other, and realistic even for that to be the root of some conflict. 
tldr; not using a specific label to prevent negative presentations of the characters seems a bit strange to do when the coding would be based off the text, but with limited representation available I see why it would be done, even if I still believe minority-coding is free game to expand/interpret.
Improperly Labeling a Character as “POC-coded” Suggests the Experiences of All People of Color are the Same 
The article argues that labeling Loki as POC-coded “suggests that all people of color have the same experiences, when in reality, people of color come from different places, have different cultures, and have different traditions.” And while it’s true that the term doesn’t go into detail about which particular experiences (and these experiences can vary vastly due to diversity!) the appropriate measure would be to remove the umbrella term POC altogether as people of colour tend to also vary. But that’s also exactly why it’s an all-encompassing general term? It’s a way to denote anyone who isn’t “white” and has the associated cultural privilege that comes with the concept of white supremacy.  
And, obviously, in the fictional setting presented, the concept of white supremacy is not prodded at, but cultural supremacy is definitely one that makes recurring appearances, right next to the parts about Asgard being a realm built on imperialism with ongoing colonial practice. 
My take on this is that Loki’s narrative features a struggle with identity after finding out he’s of a different race and was being treated differently his entire life and being Jotun was presumably a part of the reasoning even if he didn’t know it. He’s basically treated as of less worth for inherently existing differently. I do believe that racism is a common-enough POC experience, but that while Loki was born with blue skin he passes/appears white which is why I don’t say that Loki is a POC, just that he has been coded/can be interpreted this way. 
There’s also the entire thing with Loki trying to fit in and prove he belongs by trying to fit the theory and be The Most Asgardian by committing genocide (which ultimately makes no difference as he’s still not the ‘acceptable’ version of Asgardian), and the denial/rejection of his birth culture in destructively lashing out towards them (which even Thor is confused by because Loki isn’t typically violent), and the fact his self worth plummets and he is passively suicidal upon finding out he’s Jotun (internalized racism? general drop in self-worth after finding out he’s adopted and has been lied to? Bit of both?), but what do I know, I’m sure none of those are, at their base, common experiences or relatable feelings for anyone or decent rep because we see such themes on-screen presented wonderfully in different lights all the time. 
tldr; every set of experiences could be different, some types of discrimination could overlap, if you limit an umbrella term to only very specific circumstances then it’s no longer an umbrella term.
Suggesting that White Characters are Meant to be Seen as People of Color Ignores the Actual Characters of Color that are Present in these Stories
I don’t agree with most of this section, but that may just be the way the arguments are put together, which I don’t blame the author for.
“ Implying that Loki is a person of color completely ignores Heimdall and Hogun, the only Black and Asian Asgardians who appear in the movie. ”
Characters such as Hogun and Heimdall which are played by actual people of colour have smaller roles in the films and any prejudice they could face for being POC in-universe isn’t made apparent, while Loki at the very least comes to the realization that something he couldn’t change (race, parentage,) was having him treated differently his whole life and had to come to terms with it. The Vanir/Aesir are also both treated similarly on-screen, and Heimdall having dark skin isn’t plot relevant, whereas Jotnar are treated as lesser consistently and are relevant through the movie (breaking into the vault, Thor and co. attack Jotunheim, Loki’s deal with Laufey, the attempted regicide (and the successful one XD), destroying jotunheim, Loki saying he’s not Thor’s brother,). 
I also see including characters as POC-coded as... more representation? In all canon-compliant interpretations of the characters Hogun being Vanir is always explicitly mentioned because it’s a fact that just is, up to the appearance and even the world-building of Vanaheim in some fanworks use particularly East Asian culture as inspiration. I have never come across a Marvel fandom Heimdall interpretation where he’s not Black... but because these characters are more minor/side-characters of course they get less attention! 
“ In Loki’s fandom, Heimdall’s name sometimes gets thrown in to suggest that it was he all along who was the real villain due to his “racism” against Loki and the rest of the Jotun. It is, of course, ironic to suggest that somehow the only Black Asgardian to appear in the movie can oppress the privileged white prince. “
I... don’t know where to start with this. But the example of theorizing given in the article wasn’t suggesting Heimdall was bad or trying to explain his actions in Thor 1 by saying he is Black... and just looking at a character’s actions shouldn’t be done less or more critically because of skin tone in my opinion. Heimdall may have been trying to do what was best and protect the realm but if the audience didn’t know that Loki was up to dodgy things then the coding would be switched around because he was trying to spy and committed treason and then tried to kill Loki. People... can hold feelings towards others... regardless of skin... and suspect them... for reasons other than skin... although I do still have questions about whether Heimdall knew Loki was Jotun or not. (Even if I personally don’t think it’d make a difference to how he’d treat Loki?)
Some Loki fans have also suggested that because Jotuns have blue skin that this alone makes him a person of color (even if the audience is only allowed to see Loki in his true Jotun form for mere seconds of screentime). This, again, shows a lack of understanding when it comes to race. It doesn’t matter what skin color the Jotuns have. 
Race can differentiate between physical and/or behavioural characteristics!! Not being blue all the time doesn’t make him any less Jotun!! He’s got internalized stuff to work through and is used to being Aesir!! At least 1 parent is Jotun so even if Loki was passing as Aesir he’s probably Jotun!! (I don’t know how magic space genetics work for sure but Loki being Jotun was an entire very important jump-starting point in Thor 1!!). It’s a fantasy text and typically things like having different coloured skin indicates a different race or is sometimes if a species has multiple then is just considered a skin colour. That’s how coding works!! The Jotnar are very specifically the only race we see in the movie with a skin-tone not within the ‘normal’ human range, which alienates them to the audience from the get-go!! They’re an “other” and on the opposite side to the ‘good’ characters.
Both Loki and his birth father, Laufey (Colm Feore), are played by white men, and it is impossible for a white man to successfully play a character of color. 
The specification of men here bothers me, but yes, you don’t get ‘white’ people to play characters of colour if it can be avoided. (And it can be avoided.)
This also connects with the previous point made that people of color come from various places. There is nothing specifically about the Jotun that could be traced to any specific person of color, and even if there were, there would be no way for white men to portray them without being disrespectful.
This is where arguments about the definition of coding and how specificity/generalizations and do/don’t come in. I know I’m subjective and lean towards the more rep the better, but while I agree ‘white’ people wouldn’t be able to respectfully play a POC I don’t think that rule should have to carry over into fantasy-based fiction. I know texts reflect on reality and reality can reflect within texts, but if contextually there is racial discrimination and there are similar ideas which resonate with the audience’s own experiences I’d say it’s coded well enough to allow that.
tldr; Thor 1′s narrative revolves mainly around Thor and Loki, of which race is kinda kinda a significant theme in Loki’s part of the story. Not so much explored with less-developed side characters such as Heimdall and Hogun, even though their actors are actual people of colour. 
How Much of this is Really Well-Intentioned?
In the fantasy space viking world Heimdall and Hogun don’t face any on-screen prejudice and their appearance is not mentioned (which is nice, for sure! good to have casual rep!) but adding on to the roles they play in the narrative the explicit fantasy-racism in the movie isn't aimed at Asian/Black characters, but towards the Humans -to a lesser extent- and the Jotnar, including Loki, who only just found out he comes under that bracket.
The article mentions how fandom space toxicity often “reaches the actors who portray the characters,“ which is true, and it’s shameful that people have to justify their roles or presences are harassed for the pettiest things like skin tone/cultural background, but I don’t see coding characters as removing the spotlight from interesting characters such as those which are actually POC, rather expressing a demand for more rep, since well-written complex characters which are diverse are often absent/minor enough in the media, and therefore can get easily brushed aside in both canon and fandom spaces.
tldr; It’s obviously not a replacement for actual representation, but, if a character is marginalized and can be interpreted as coded, even if they would only be considered so within the context of the textual landscape, I don’t see why spreading awareness through exploring the coding as a possibility for the character shouldn’t be done, even if the media is being presented by people who are ‘white’ or privileged or may not fall into the categories themselves, as long as it’s done respectfully to those it could explicitly represent.
#please don’t patronize me by asking to quit while i’m ahead#it doesn't help anyone#so anyway i've summarized my opinion on the coding thing here for the many anons whose answers could be answered in this ask alone#i think i covered everything?#the article started out okay but I found it kinda :/ in places even though there were valid concerns#I do believe that in-universe context and creators of the media should be taken into account#and that if marginalized themes can be touched on by non-marginalized groups then... great? fictional texts can help people understand#i do also think that rep being presented should if not on-screen have people working on the product to support and ensure it's done well#the world is cold and harsh and cruel and i just wanted a desi Loki AU but here we are#I've got to try and summarize how I think Thor 1 presents Loki's part of the narrative well with POC-coding there because of fantasy-racism#even if the POC-coding is ignored the themes of racism are far too apparent to ignore#loki spends the entire film being a multi-dimensional character and having an entire downfall fueled by grief and a desire to be loved#I don't think attaching a label to such a character would be a negative thing... but perhaps for casual watchers it'd be a bit :/#apparently not everyone takes into account the 1000+ years of good behavior around that 1 year of betrayal/breakdown/identity crisis/torture#MetaAnalysisForTheWin#MAFTW#ThisPostIsLongerThanMyLifeSpan#TPILTMLS#AgreeToDisagreeOrNot#ATDON#poc-coding#yes i ignored everything not about loki in the article what about it#hmmm I know people are going to disagree with me with what should and shouldn't be allowed#I know some people are okay with it but some don't like the poc-coding thing#and that's fine#completely understandable#makes me uncomfy to talk about fictional space racism in comparison to real life but I do think that lack of rep is why coding is important#for some people coding is all that they get#but also!! @ifihadmypickofwishes suggested the term racial allegory and I do believe that is also suitable here!! so I’ll try using that too#rather than poc-coding even though I still believe it applies
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greensolivagant · 2 years
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Supernatural Fic Recs
Category: Sam and Dean Fics To Cry Over
Pairing: Gen
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Title and Author: Soft Like a Blue Triceratops by sprinkles888
Summary: Sam finishes the trials, expecting to die. Instead, he gets a life that sounds idyllic - the demons locked away, the angels gone (mostly), and Dean by his side.
All he has to worry about is the various monsters attempting to fill the power vacuum; a too-empty bunker; his own deteriorating mental health; Dean’s dive back into alcoholism; and not getting enough sleep (even for him). Oh yeah, and that pesky fact that his dreams are starting to seem a little bit too much like visions. He can handle it. He can.
(Sometimes he can’t.)
If this is healing, Sam sure doesn’t want to know what deterioration looks like.
Word Count: 67k
Status: Multi-Chapter, Complete
Notes: A season eight finale/post-season 8 AU. Basically a what-if in terms of Sam completing the Trials and successfully locking Heaven and Hell. Lots of healing between the brothers and quite a few topics are addressed in this that aren’t ever spoken about in the show. If you want a Sam that’s on his last leg and a Dean that’s able to admit to his shortcomings, then this is the fic for you.
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Title and Author: A Moment Like Forever by RiatheMai
Summary: "Sheriff, I—I need your help."
That was never a good thing to hear over the phone at 2:48 in the morning, and the fact that it was Dean on the other end only made it worse. Of course, Jody wasn't going to turn him away. She couldn't imagine what kind of trouble he had managed to get into this time--though, knowing the Winchesters, it was most likely supernatural in nature--and why Dean was saying "I" instead of "we". She sure as hell wasn't prepared for what showed up on her doorstep four hours later.
Dean looked exhausted: dark circles under lack-luster eyes and several days' worth of beard over a tense jaw and grim mouth. He was alone except for the small, sleeping child he held bundled in his arms.
"Dean? Where is Sam?"
Dean, looking more lost than she'd ever seen him look, glanced down at the child in his arms; and he smiled even as tears filled his eyes.
"This *is* Sam."
Word Count: 57k
Status: Multi-Chapter, Complete
Notes: Features Jody, but even if you’re not a big fan of her I seriously recommend you give this fic a shot anyway. The way that the author portrays Jody made me actively appreciate her role in this fic instead of merely finding her an unnecessary addition to the story. This is definitely a tear-jerker, but so worth the read.
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Title and Author: We As Human by inkandpaperqwerty
Summary: Sam has been struggling with depression since Stanford. Well, not really struggling. Excelling. He's been excelling at depression since Stanford, and it's only gotten worse since he started hunting again. Unfortunately, the relapses from John's death and Dean's trip to Hell were bad, but they had nothing on the downward spiral triggered by Sam starting the Apocalypse.
But Sam has never come clean before, and he isn't about to start. He's self-medicating, he's suppressing, and he's handling things in the Trademark Winchester Way. He can do this. He can totally do this.
Spoiler: No, he can't.
Word Count: 41k
Status: Multi-Chapter, Complete
Notes: This fic ruined me, I honestly had to take a few days to read just pure fluff after this emotional monster of a fic. The author characterizes Sam so beautifully and for once, I found both him and his struggles painfully relatable. There are so many impactful lines in this, speeches that hit you right where it counts and leave you reeling. I feel like all Supernatural fans should be required to read this masterpiece, seriously.
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Title and Author: Sounds Like Truth and Feels Like Courage by sprinkles888
Summary: Turns out that the Men of Letters had a way to perform magic on the regular without the messiness of witchcraft.
All they need for it is a pair of soulmates, a couple of rings from the bunker, and a willingness to spend time platonically touching. And, well, the Winchesters are already sitting at two out of three…
Word Count: 30k
Status: Multi-Chapter, Complete
Notes: The Author sums it up nicely: In which Sam and Dean cuddle, spend time being emotionally vulnerable, mend relationships, learn just how powerful their souls are, find power in memories, watch way too much Netflix, and become targets of an organized group of monsters set on killing them.
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Title and Author: Aleph by story_monger
Summary: Dean never meant to be rescued from Hell by angels. It just happened. Too bad they got there too late, though, because it turns out that being a demon on Earth sucks. It really, really sucks.
Season 4 AU wherein Dean turns darkside before Castiel can rescue him but it's okay because he makes a crappy demon anyway.
Word Count: 10k
Status: Oneshot
Notes: This is a brilliant fic that characterizes Demon Dean really well, the author gives him a lot more depth than the source material. He’s gritty and broken and sadistic in true demon fashion but, at the core, the character portrayed in this fic is still undeniably Dean.
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the-nysh · 3 years
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1) There is 100s of interpretation and this one may not be the flavour of the month but since I saw a bit of discussion on Deku focusing too much on the hero and neglecting the human and has been through out most of the story (even being able to admire Bakugou so much because of his heroic potential despite seeing him as a jerk as a person), so in how Deku and Bakugou often contrast, perhaps Bakugou was too much a person than he was a hero. The story seems to make a pseundo divide between
2) Villain/ Human/ Hero, where if you are not a Hero your just a human and a Villain is less than human, which has been iterated explicity a number of times. Bakugou enters the story where "he doesn't know what it means to be a hero", but he's definitely not a villain, so he starts the story very "human", not presenting any of the expectation of the hero image by being unabashedly himself. That honesty gets him villified by the heroes and the villains thinking he would relate to them.
Oho...?? 👀 What you’re saying is interesting, cause yes, I did happen to see some discussion about that! Mainly from Deku’s side, how he’s always fixated most of his goals/efforts on embodying the ‘hero’ at the expense of seeing the human, down to even neglecting his own human needs. But then when we’re introduced to how he sees Kacchan, he starts out as neither ‘good’ nor ‘bad,’ just confidently and unapologetically himself. Which Deku finds both personally inspiring (hero traits to strive for) and closest within reach as ‘human’ - since Deku also saw him as a person who’s not above needing help when hurt (ie the river incident.) The type of compassion young Kacchan misunderstood as a blow to his own growing image of ‘hero’ and strength. :’) So in this way, yes, Kacchan began as a bright/promising but fallible, impressionable person, whose future prospects and character label/interpretation could’ve easily fallen to either side of the hero/villain dichotomy (beyond Kacchan’s own firm decisions about heroism to strive for, and Hori’s promise he’d never go villain~) As even yes, the villains misjudged him by appearances and assumed he’d relate to them best.
3) Considering the lack of human compassion being offered to villains is a point of why they don't get saved, and how quick the media is to villify Bakugou for displaying his emotions (when he was the one being mistreated), Bakugou position in the middle feels like its pretty significant. However as the story goes on Bakugou learnt more about what it means to be a hero, and now Deku needing to learn more about considering himself as person. I wonder if it also could tie into the text regarding 4) the false conflation of quirks being tied to a persons worth or inherent nature (with AFO using it to groom Tenko), since Deku's quirklessness links so strongly to "useless" and why he tries so hard to always do his best to remove himself from that which brings him to turning away from who he is as a person, not unlike how Shoto once neglected his fire side but instead of making the "power his own" Deku needs to own himself without relying on a quirk as a means to have worth. Whereas Bakugou 5) did start looking beyond his quirk for what he was missing to be the person he wants to be and so separated out just having a great power dictating his destiny. While the powerless kid was a hero all along but neglected their humanity and now lost themselves to their power and mission - mirroring how Tomura also gave up what little they had of themselves for power and their goal, it feels like Bakugou closest to being great in power and as a person. Flawed interpretation but wanted to share.
Oho! Concerning Kacchan beginning in the middle as a promising human, and choosing to learn more (of his own volition) about being the best hero; whereas Deku begins following the fixation on heroes, and must now (be forced to) learn/acknowledge the value of himself as a human. :O I can see that! Yes, Deku needs to own/value himself as a person without disregarding who he is first, or he can’t hope to successfully reach out and empathize with the ‘human’ in others - such as the villains, who’ve suffered the most from dehumanization. Deku finding that inherent worth/strength in his own humanity, that goes beyond quirks dictating his destiny, much like Kacchan’s already done to address what he’d lacked. :O That at this point in time, yes I would also agree that Kacchan (after experiencing his ‘rising’ moment) is much closer at successfully becoming the best person & hero he wants to be, both self-aware of his power/worth & faithful to his own goals. Whereas Deku’s yet to address his neglected missing element (the ‘human’ he’s losing within himself, which we can see without it, becomes most fatal) before he can fully succeed too. Which is very interesting to compare/contrast how their characters have progressed (on similar, but different vectors) from their starting origins up til now, so thanks anon for sharing! :D
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jackmichaelstudio · 4 years
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Juror’s Statement, Lees-McRae College Student Art Show, Spring 2021
Last week, I had the pleasure of serving as juror for the annual Student Art Show at Lees-McRae College in Banner Elk, NC. 
If you’re an art student or young artist and you’ve ever wondered what goes into a juror’s decision-making process for a show - whether it’s for basic inclusion in the show or for awards - please read on.
JUROR’S STATEMENT Lees-McRae Student Art Show, Spring 2021
Jurying a student show is a difficult task. Submitting to a student show is equally arduous, so first and foremost, I want to congratulate everyone for having the courage to submit your work.
By nature, the jury process is neither kind nor an exact science. Evaluating artwork is, in many ways, a subjective exercise mediated by personal taste. But it is also a skill honed by experience, research, and by regularly considering artwork from ancient eras to the present day. As an artist and educator, I’m old enough to have developed a time-tested approach to evaluating craftsmanship, aesthetic quality, and cultural thoughtfulness. However, I’m still young enough to remember the undergrad-era sting of having my work – which I (wrongly) felt had singular vision and emotional importance – overlooked for awards and inclusion in shows. I remember asking myself “Why me?”, not knowing then what I know now: that a juried show is not only about the artwork; it is a relational exercise between artists, artwork, and the juror.
Ideally, a juror’s initial decision – the making of “the first cut” - is based on a combination of objective factors such as craftsmanship, presentation, technical skill, and attention to composition. If these are lacking in an artwork, then the work cannot hope to be a vehicle for greater meaning. At best, artwork with a dearth of craftsmanship and skill is mere decoration; at worst, it is a weak monument to an artist’s inability (or unwillingness) to commit their time and energy to their own ideas and personal potential. Young artists often struggle with this truth, making halfheartedly-crafted work that bounces around between mediums and themes, never pausing long enough to develop the technical expertise necessary to be a truly good artist. In the great quest to know what their work is “about” and how to make it, art students often make the mistake of looking for an idea that is “worth believing in” or seeking a new process – usually a novelty-based one that they feel is unique - before they really believe in and commit to their work. To those young artists, I say this: you think that commitment to your work is an elusive feeling that will finally grace you if you find some idea/process worth believing in…but you have it backwards. Belief does not pave the way for commitment; if you wholly commit to your work in both idea and process, you will create things worth believing in.
Aside from attention to craft and technical skill, it is this commitment to ideas and methods that guided me in making “the second cut” to select the award winners for this show. Ultimately, I was looking for artworks that answered “yes” to the following questions:
Does this artwork successfully convey a mood or message without being trite or didactic?
Aside from basic technical proficiency, does the work evince a developed sensitivity of material handling?
Does the work go beyond mere observation/decorative quality to compel the viewer with a question or deeper attention to an idea? Does it invite me to explore it further?
Does the work successfully avoid cliché?
Has the artist pushed boundaries, broken rules, taken risks, or at least tweaked the conventions of this medium’s typical subject matter?
Does the work resonate with me in some way, either stylistically or ideologically?
Is the work creative, free from derivation, and in possession of a sense of inventiveness and original thinking?
Does the artist un-self-consciously embrace a style that is markedly his/her/their own?
Would I like to see more work by this artist?
Is there a harmonious marriage of form, subject matter, and content?
Does the piece exhibit the potential to grow into a broader, more mature body of work that seeds new, kindred artworks in the future?
Does the work take an unapologetic critical or investigative stance in relation to a specific idea of contemporary relevance, or at least to our culture at large?
And Does the combination of ideological specificity, emotional vulnerability, and attention to craft & content indicate that this young artist might on the verge of truly committing to addressing the ideas in this work for the sustained near future (the next 1-3 years)?
I want to emphasize that every submission I reviewed had positive attributes; there were several of solid merit that did not receive an award. There were also many works that answered “yes” to some of these questions, but fell short of award due to craft, presentation, or technical issues. There were just as many works that displayed adept material handling but fell prey to cliché or to being mere observational decoration. To those of you who did not receive an award: please continue (or start) to believe in your ideas and commit to technical expertise and attention to craft. If you do, good things will happen.
To those of you who did receive an award: I wholeheartedly congratulate you! I, as your humble juror, did not give you an award – you earned it.
Ultimately, the pieces selected for award in this show (some to a greater extent than others) positively addressed the above questions in a way that marked them out from the crowd while also evincing technical proficiency and attention to craft. Even in the case of top awardees, however, the aforementioned questions should be embraced as consistent guidons to propel further improvement. I encourage you to copy these questions out and keep them in a place where they will confront you every day (whether you like it or not). Look at them, strive toward them, and internalize them until your own work resoundingly and consistently answers “yes” to each and every one. There is always, always, always room for improvement. People in other professions may have the luxury of someday “arriving” at penultimate expertise but as artists, the only thing we can get comfortable with is the fact that we will never “arrive” – we will (if we are smart and lucky) always be seeking, evolving, pursuing.
I encourage all of you – awardees and others alike - to continue to submit your work to shows such as this one, and to juried shows and calls for proposals or residencies on a regional and national scale. Exposure to the judgments of a wide variety of arts professionals (in addition to your stellar faculty) is the most valuable and surefire way of challenging and maturing your own ideas and skills. This is true even – and perhaps especially – when things don’t go your way.
Above all, I hope that all participants of this show remember this: thick skin is important. As an artist at any stage in your career, many of your best efforts will result in disappointment, but the number of disappointments is a downward-trending arc over time: the longer you do this wholeheartedly, the more sublime, elating wins you will achieve. Rejections are not a reason to quit; they are reasons to lean in and commit to your ideas, skill development, and professional growth sooner rather than later…or get out of the way of those who are doing that and find the path of expertise and interest that is truly for you. As a student artist, if you are successful at only 10% of your pursuits, you are doing well. So cultivate patience, perseverance, skill, and a thick skin. Happiness isn’t a function of chance – it is the result of ideological commitment and technical expertise exercised over time, resulting in somewhat-consistent success. Start today.
Finally, I want to thank Lees-McRae College and the Art Department for your genuine hospitality and for the invitation to jury this show – it was truly an honor. I see deep promise in a healthy selection of this work. That is no doubt due to the Art faculty doing the energetic, dedicated, and often emotionally-taxing work of molding young people with ideas and feelings into young artists with mature ideas, considered feelings, and – above all – work that expertly carries the resultant messages and investigations. Thank you for your service to the future of art and artists in our region and beyond, and thank you again for having me.
Warmly,
Jack Michael Art Instructor, Blue Ridge Community College
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smarchit · 4 years
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Do No Harm pt 3
It’s here folks!!! So sorry for the delay - it’s been sitting in my drafts for so long. But I’m sick of looking at it and sick of that guilt of not posting eating away at me. Here you go my loves!
Nearly two months had passed since Din had taken Wynn aboard following the Imps' ransack of her village. It sometimes still didn't feel real to her, if she were being completely honest. She was afraid that she would wake up in a prison cell for harboring a fugitive and all this would have been a dream.
Wynn had taken to caring for the Child like he was her own, and she loved him dearly. She sang to him, fed him, chased him around all day, and tucked him into bed at night while Din collected bounties and brought credits for food back with him. 
It was a sort of mutual agreement the pair had come to shortly after she'd come aboard. She didn't mind being alone with the kid. He was a dreadful conversation partner though, but then again, so was his father.
Wynn found herself thinking about him constantly. She worried when he was off on a job, and felt relief wash over her when he would return unharmed. 
Oftentimes, she wanted to just sit him down and talk. About literally anything. He could talk about disassembling his blaster or how to properly gut a Tuan-Tuan for warmth on some backwater planet. She would hang on every word if that were the case. Wynn wanted to talk about how to successfully deliver a breeched baby, or how to dislodge a foreign object from the windpipe of a choking toddler, just because she wanted to remind herself that she knew how to do it. She just wanted to hear him talk about all the random things he knew how to do. For Maker's sake, she wanted to know all the ways he knew to cheat at Sabbac or all the intricacies of carbonite freezing. As cute as he was, the kid lacked in attentive listening skills and active communication. 
It had been so long since she spoke with another person, like really, actually exchanged words with someone apart from little asides with vendors at a market who may or may not speak basic. 
Mostly, she wanted to talk about what had never been addressed - the Imperial siege of her village, his (dashing) rescue of her, and the fact that she knew his name. His real, honest-to-Maker name. He had never formally introduced himself to her, and everyone who the pair had come into contact with referred to him as simply Mando. So she referred to him as Mando. 
He'd called her Wynnlow every day since he first brought her aboard and Wynn grimaced every time the name passed through the vocoder. She actually began to regret telling him that only her friends called her Wynn. She wanted to be his friend in an almost hopeless way.
Mandalorians do not have friends, Wynnlow. They do not have allies. Only each other.
Both the Child and his caretaker were going on nearly three days of silence at this point. Mando had gone off on a job and discouraged her from going to the market on a not so subtle warning that the planet wasn't particularly safe for someone with no combat training.
Wynn would have been alright with being left alone, provided their food supplies held up. Mando was only supposed to be gone for about a week tops, but left two weeks of food on the Crest, just in case. Unfortunately, the airtight seal on one case had broken, leaving half their food to spoil. So as long as Mando came back in time, they'd be fine. He was very rarely late.
To pass the time, Wynn had been studying the Child. She'd seen all manner of children in her time, assisted both first time and experienced mothers alike to bring new life into the galaxy, but never once had she seen anything like him.
If Wynn's guess was anything to go off of, she pegged the Child as the human equivalent of a 16-18 month old. But then, she figured that was an inaccurate scale to go by. He was most likely developing normally for his species, though Wynn constantly wished she knew his species so she would have more accurate information to compare it to.
For the past several hours, Wynn had been rolling a tiny silver ball the Child brought her across the floor. The baby would totter after it and then bring it back, giggling the whole time.
Suddenly, the whole ship rumbled furiously as the main entrance opened with a grating screech. There was a loud scuffle, then strained grunt followed by what sounded like a curse.
"Get in," Mando growled from below. "You were more trouble than you were worth. 
Wynn heard the carbonite chamber activate as it whirred to life in the cargo bay, trapping yet another bounty in its confines. She did her best to ignore the fire that roared to life in her belly at Mando's grunts and growls as he brought the bounty on board. 
The Child toppled into Wynn's lap, blessedly distracting her, the tiny ball still clutched in his fingers. His massive ears twitched as he heard heavy foot steps coming up the ramp.
Mando stormed past the living quarters where Wynn and the Child were playing. He bypassed the fresher and stomped up the ladder to the cockpit. He sounded in a foul mood. 
"Fine," Wynn sighed dramatically. "I'll go talk to him!" She stood, scooped the baby into her arms, and pressed a sweet kiss to his head before she put him in his pod. He blinked sleepily up at her and cooed as he handed her the silver ball.
Mando was angrily mashing buttons in the cockpit and muttering to himself under his breath. The sound was barely coming through beneath his helmet. He barely acknowledged that Wynn had even joined him. 
"He give you any trouble?" he asked without even looking up from the navigator. 
Wynn put one hand in the pocket of her skirt and shook her head. "Nah, he was fine. Couldn't have been better, really. Not much fun to have a conversation with though."
"He's a good listener," Mando replied. There was the faintest hint of a smile on the edge of his voice.
Wynn couldn't help but smile. It was honestly the first time he had made anything remotely close to a joke since she'd been travelling with him.
"You're not so bad of a listener yourself, you know," she hummed. Wynn crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the door, eyes focused on Mando as he prepared for takeoff. 
"Is he asleep?" he asked, glancing up at her. 
She nodded and lowered herself into the copilot seat behind him. "If not now, he will be soon. Tuckered himself out."
Mando nodded once. "He usually does. Except when I want him to go to bed. It's like he knows."
Wynn smiled. The way he spoke of his foundling made him seem almost normal. Like there was a big softie under all that armor after all.
"Kids and babies know when we want them to do something for ourselves," she said with a laugh. "And babies will come when they want. Trust me. I got called into the inn one night a while ago, a traveler and his partner got stranded when their ship was damaged. She went into labor three weeks early. I got called in to help."
"Children like to come at inopportune times," Mando said, reaching for a lever. He sighed and dropped his hand into his lap. 
Wynn chuckled and held up the little silver ball the Child had been playing with. She extended her hand to him with the ball in her fingers.
"I think they come exactly when we need them to. Maybe we just don't know it yet."
Mando stared at her, his gaze hidden behind the visor. He watched her curiously, though perhaps for a moment too long, as she cleared her throat in an attempt to get his attention or to break his gaze. Slowly, he reached out to take the tiny ball from her hands. All he wanted was to get them to the next planet together safely. They both knew that they couldn't stay in one place for very long.
Wynn placed the ball in his outstretched hand, slowly, as if she was going to frighten him if she moved too fast. She left her hand in his for a moment, long enough to feel the warmth of his skin beneath soft leather. 
Mando's eyes were locked on where their hands were joined. He felt the weight of her hand in his, the warmth that radiated off of her, a wonderful contrast to the slight chill of the ship's recycled air.
The silence and stillness was broken by the loud wail of the Child from the living quarters.
Wynn glanced over her shoulder and sighed as she let her hand fall to her side. "He might be hungry. I told him we'd eat a while ago."
"He doesn't like to be kept waiting," Mando hummed. He reattached the little silver ball and turned away from her, his shoulders squared off, his spine rigid once more.
Wynn sighed and went to gather the baby from his pod. "I'll bring you food too," she promised, poking her head back into the cockpit.
Mando replied with a grunt and a wave of his hand, too busy with finalizing takeoff to even listen to her words. 
It was as if that hand holding, if it could even be called that, had never happened. Mando was back to his same old sullen self. 
Wynn watched him for a moment to try and see if he relaxed when he thought he was alone. She wouldn't ever dare to spy on him when he was eating or any time she knew his helmet was off. She would never even think of betraying his trust like that. One creed to another. 
The way his hand clenched and unclenched several times against his thigh as he sat in the cockpit, however, did not go unnoticed by the young doctor. It was the same hand she'd placed the ball into and held for maybe just a second too long. She still felt the warmth and softness of his glove against her palm.
Reluctantly, she tore her gaze away and went to get the Child to bring him food before he could scream again. 
Once the Child was sleeping soundly in his pod for the night, his belly full from supper, Wynn made her way up to the cockpit.
She found some manuals on anatomy at a marketplace a few weeks prior and Mando had slipped a few credits to the shopkeeper to buy them. She didn't often get time to read when she was at home, and now she had practically all the time in the galaxy. It felt strange, really. 
She stopped just outside the door leading in and knocked loudly to announce to Mando that she was coming in. A second passed, then two, before she heard him mumble a soft, "Come in."
Mando was seated in his chair, watching the stars streak by the window. He turned to her when she entered and he lifted his hand in a small wave.
Wynn paused in the doorway, her gaze locked on the man before her. He was leaned back with his thighs spread almost inviting her in. His hands were behind his head as he lazily turned his head to the side to look at her. She felt her mouth go dry and she swallowed the lump in her throat. 
"Finally gonna learn about the mating processes of Gungan tonight," she said, giving the manual a shake as she entered the cockpit. "I'd rather be doing... anything else."
"Don't torture yourself like that," Mando said, a small chuckle working its way out of his vocoder. 
Wynn smiled and curled herself into the copilot seat. It wasn't often that Mando laughed, but when he did, it always made her feel warm inside, fuzzy and tingly that she'd made someone happy. 
"Where are we going next?" Wynn asked after a few moments of silent reading. At the beginning, she was always nervous that Mando was going to leave her somewhere on some planet alone, with no money and only the clothes on her back. The more she traveled with him, the less anxious she became, but that worry was always there. She doubted it would ever go away, really.
"Back to Nevarro for now," he said. "Gonna turn in these bounties, pick up a few more. Stock up on supplies, head back out."
"Aren't you worried about being tracked down on Nevarro?" She shut the book and held it in her lap, focusing her full attention on him.
Mando shrugged. "Nevarro is a hotbed anyway. Just another face in the crowd there."
"But there's so many Imps there," she replied.
"That's why you're gonna stay on the ship with the kid while I go," he said. He held up a hand when Wynn's eyes widened. "Hang on, let me finish. You'll stay here. If I'm not back by nightfall when we land or you don't hear anything from me in a few hours, you take this ship and leave. Coordinates are in there for a safe destination already. You get there with the kid."
Wynn swallowed down the lump in her throat. She couldn't leave Mando, no matter what.
"You'll be fine," he assured her. "Besides, the possibility of something happening is pretty low. You shouldn't have anything to worry about."
Wynn nodded shakily. "Right."
Mando nodded. "Right."
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kuvopal · 4 years
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put the anon about ATWR under the cut (also because the anon’s email address was attached). My response is beneath it.
Before going into reasons of why insecurities and jealousy wouldn’t be the sole obstacles and hardships of their future relationship dynamic,i would like to point out that throughout the story ( and especially in the beginning ) we see that Kuvira uses sex with many people as a way to cope with the emotional/psychological scars of her past abusive relationship,which she got into not only because she was alone and scared in a big city as a girl who had just come into terms with her sexuality but also because perhaps she wanted to redo her relationship with Suyin through a woman also in her middle ages,experienced and “motherly”.
After these experiences,commitment and the fear of feeling trapped and abused again went hand in hand with Kuvira,which lead her to constructing many sexual relationships with one sided vulnerabilities.
With these data points i can certainly say that,while one can be with as many people as they please,in this case Kuvira’s promiscuity is fueled by trauma,lack of validation and attention from her past parental figures and fear,overall making her coping methods very unhealthy for they are consequences of not apathy but a trauma ridden mental state.Which leads me to believe that after unpacking these things and working on her fears with therapy,she wouldn’t choose the ways she had chosen before as she would heal from the “trapped” state of mind and would make decisions from a neutral state instead.
But let’s say therapy and healing process did not happen properly and she still wants to ride getaway cars of variety.What would happen? First off,while i too,disagree that people who carry emotional baggages and trauma cannot sustain healthy relationships,if the trauma is about fear of intimacy,commitment and love,the core essences to a romantic relationship itself ; how can one even sustain a romantic relationship? Let alone a healthy one.If the afore mentioned factors do not come into play in a romantic relationship, that would look more like a friendship.
With that being said, while technically having a familiar,safe and strong anchor of a relationship whilst pursuing exciting,new and fresh exchanges sounds amazing and almost ideal,realistically that could threaten and dampen perhaps not directly the love that is shared but the bond that is shared between those two people.
We commit our time and energy to a lot of things in life: work,school,family,friends,self…but the distinguishment between commiting our time and energy to these things and sexual relations with many people is…intimacy.Now this is a tricky subject because how can one person assure that the intimacy they share with other people won’t outweight the intimacy shared with a partner,or slowly replace it? Even if both sides have healthy communication skills and little jealousy/insecurity, this dynamic could lessen and the shared intimacy,intimate time and energy as a consequence of intimacy being shared with many people at the same time,which could lead to weakening of shared bond and therefore could affect their love as a final step.
Taking everything into account,humans are rarely technical about relationships and emotions,despite factors of will and self control.And although lack of communication and lifestyle balancing are shared problems within both monogamous and poly relationship dynamics,their concreteness and technical essences make the matters more managable as they can be solved with rationality, in comparison to problems regarding shared intimacy and weakening of intimate bonds,a matter that can be aproached with little to no rationality.
To sum up, love is simply not enough to sustain a romantic relationship,and although Kuvira has grown a lot throughout the story,both she and Opal has a long way to go before making the decision to be together,seriously and intentionally.
basically I agree, but I don’t think I ever implied that Kuvira is done changing, only that she is on the path of change. I also wanted to indicate that Kuvira would not be the sole evil polyamorous villain breaking poor perfect opal’s heart. I don’t intend to simplify your arguments to that, as I agree with a lot of them, but the criticism landing squarely on Kuvira (as it has in these exchanges) has made me uncomfortable and I don’t think it’s fair.
(As a sidenote, I also believe it’s perfectly plausible for people to be in polyamorous relationships where intimacy isn’t threatened by being intimate with other people. Sorry, it’s not possible to convince me otherwise. Humans are diverse, and different things work for different people. For some it will never hold true, but for others it will. This has always been a fictional story, and my fictional world doesn’t have to be beholden to the standards of my own life, or anyone else’s.)
For what it’s worth, the sequel was going to pick up ~10 years later, where both characters would have had time to grow, date other people, and figure out their priorities. but now I wonder if anyone actually wants to read it lmao or if the thought of a traumatized bisexual polyamorous woman successfully ending up in a healthy relationship with someone she loves is that unbelievable - either that she would be incapable of healthy love, or that she wouldn’t deserve it.
On one hand I’m glad you’ve engaged deeply with the characters/story, but on the other hand I’m like?? If the only person who’s apparently engaged that deeply thinks that it’s not going to happen, why would I waste anyone’s time lmao? Then again, I don’t think I ever received the impression that you wanted a sequel, so like, I guess you have your answer and you can content yourself with that.
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The Depths of Cousin Fethry
So I had a hectic week and am a bit behind! I haven’t seen episode 3 yet, but before I watch it here are some thoughts on episode two. 
This episode, though kind of predictable, was a lot of fun. I really enjoyed it, from the meaningful episode name (Depths because of the sea and depths because Fethry has hidden depths geddit!) to meeting some more family members. I haven't watched or read any Ducktales before Ducktales 2017, so I don't have any prior knowledge of Fethry. I really liked him though. I'd definitely like to see more of him, and of Gladstone. It would be great, in fact to see Donald, Fethry and Gladstone interacting. In fact no let's have the entire family meet at Castle McDuck!
Anyway as well as Fethry it was really nice to see Huey and Dewey have their own spotlight episode. In the episode they had together last season - The Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks - we saw a lot of why Huey and Dewey don't get on. In this episode we saw why they do.
So it starts with Huey excitedly talking about a tree. The camera shifts view and we find he's talking to Dewey. Who is wrapped in a towel and soaking wet. Turns out Huey interrupted his bath. Dewey is not impressed. (It’s going to be a theme)
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Huey, slightly oblivious as to why Dewey isn't jumping for joy over a tree that "experienced three leap years in a row", starts testing for resin. This process involves licking the tree.
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Dewey only wanted to be interrupted for exciting things. Exciting things for Dewey consist of "ghouls, goblins, time paradoxes, daring quests that will cement our names in history". This episode starts playing out with some similarity to The Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks, in that we see both brothers having a difference of opinions. In the Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks this revolves around Mark Beaks himself with Huey idolising him and Dewey being less bothered. However then came the point where they were both offered the same thing: in the Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks it was the titular internship.
In this episode it's the tin can call from Fethry.
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Scrooge and Donald then come in. I loved their interactions in the last episode and this episode didn't disappoint either. After Scrooge drops the frame Donald keeps struggling with it in the background, chipping in every now with wonderfully dry comment as Scrooge tries to explain Fethry.
Huey tries to talk about the tree again but Dewey cuts right across him to point out the phone call.
S: That can is your cousin Fethry calling from a top secret deep sea laboratory.  
D: Top secret!?
H: Deep Sea Laboratory?!
This is something both boys can get behind, just like the internship. Dewey is interested in the adventure as always, at the chance to explore and potentially make his name. Huey is excited about the science and the knowledge.
Scrooge tries to explain why they shouldn't be so excited, leading to some great Donald input.
S: Don't get too excited Fethry's a bit, well, he's, uh -
D: He's cuckoo bananas!
I also like Scrooge's mannerisms at this point. He's awkward talking about Fethry: he first rubs the back of his head, then plays with his hands. For someone we often see very calm and in controlled, his difficulty in trying to sum up the Fethry situation shows a little about how awkward the relationship is.
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Scrooge then goes on to explain that every time they go to visit Fethry it's not generally worth it. This is nice because it both mirrors and contrasts their attitude and relationships with Gladstone. Although Gladstone was generally considered "the worst" both still went to help him, because "family always helps family". And though Gladstone is pretty self-serving even throughout the luck gauntlet he and Donald have to run openly admitting that he's "not sorry enough to sign up for a lifetime of servitude", after he's free he does agree with Louie about how they shouldn't have thrown Donald under the bus.
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"The kid's not wrong Uncle Mcduncle - what do we do?"
At first it seems Scrooge and Donald shared a similar attitude with Fethry. They've rushed down plenty of times before to help. But then Scrooge puts his hat over the can, cutting Fethry off. Even the fact Fethry has a can rather than the elaborate phones shows both Scrooge's unwillingness to communicate and Fethry's eccentricities.
S: Best to ignore it, every time we get a call from Fethry we rush down there just to go on some fools errand wrapped up in a needlessly dangerous adventure with the rambling lectures
D: and the explosions
S: and avoiding that mega tsunami
D: and the explosions
S: all to see a barnacle formation in the shape of a tractor or some such nonsense.
D: big waste of time!
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This is lost on the boys who have been getting more and more excited as Scrooge and Donald talk despite Scrooge's lack of interest and Donald's eyerolling. As they leave - Donald having finally managed to mount the tree on the frame all on his own - the can gets more insistent.  They both hear a siren call in "Adventure calling. I've made a bold new discovery!" They exchange looks - Huey excited for the sceince, Dewey for the adventure and they leap for the tin can.
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H & D (singing): Best time waste ever!
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H: Wait did we just steal a sub?!
Cue the theme!
So instead of being directly in competition this episode Huey and Dewey are working together. They've shown they do get on despite very different personalities and goals before: even in the Infernal Internship which was an episode revolving around a dispute, before they were pitted against each other they were able to coexist reasonably well with only a few minor jabs.
This pattern continues. They have moments of winding each other up or being brotherly pains, including the original you dragged me out the bath for this! But there are also moments where we see the really positive side of their relationship.
Along the lines of them being a pain to each other in the sub and Dewey rushes over to the window, interrupting Huey's facts, and knocks Huey off the ledge. What's great is Huey then gives Dewey a shove as he gets back up.
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As Dewey lists ideas for names for a new creature he thinks they’ll find, Huey rolls his eyes, but his expression is fond.
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Their teamwork is strong in this episode. Huey lets Dewey take the lead of persuading Launchpad their mission is legit and oops the communication is broken. He looks uncertain but trusts Dewey to do the talking (we know Huey has issues around his ability to lie). Huey keeping his mouth shut and trusting Dewey means they successfully fool Launchpad.
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Huey and Dewey alight onto the lighthouse. Launchpad is then distracted by another ex - Oceanica. This is a lovely callback to House of the Lucky Gander which had Launchpad seeking to help an old friend/girlfriend there. I particularly like this callback since House of the Lucky Gander was the first episode in which we met Gladstone.
(At this point I went and googled the relationships between Gladstone, Fethry and Donald. As I said at the beginning I haven't watched or read any other Ducktales content but I wanted to double check that the three were cousins. They are.)
So this is interesting because Gladstone is Uncle Gladstone, but Fethry is referred to by Scrooge as "your cousin Fethry" and this is continued then by Huey and Dewey who call him Cousin Fethry. Family names and positions past the basics aren't my strong point so (even after staring at a diagram) I'm not sure which (if either) is the right term of address and it almost doesn't matter. What's more interesting is why the difference in names has occurred.
A possible interpretation for this is that Scrooge still sees Fethry as a child. Uncles and nephews are one generation apart, but cousins are the same generation. Gladstone acts like an adult, albeit a self-serving and sometimes oblivious one. But Fethry on the other hand, still has a sense of wonder that sometimes makes him seem quite child-like - his interest in tractor shaped formations for example. By calling Fethry the triplets' cousin this is putting Fethry on their level.
Fethry isn't an especially responsible adult in terms of looking after Huey and Dewey, often leaving them behind. This is partly because he fails to see things like the worms as a threat: when he thinks Huey really is in danger from the "monster" at the end, he does go to help him. But even so he has a level of irresponsibility - what if Huey hadn't been able to be kind to the worms?
This is kind of opposite to the way Gladstone interacts with Louie. The danger in the casino is not as imminent and Louie doesn't know about it, nor does Gladstone have any reason to believe Louie will be in danger  - at least at the beginning. He pays attention to Louie even as he's trying to weaponise Donald's bad luck - getting him the suit and winking at the wheel to get it to go from free pizza for dinner to free pizza for life. He's partly showing off but he genuinely seems to enjoy spending time with Louie. However when he sees Donald storming off, he brushes Louie off and quickly follows, not seeming to worry about what then happens to Louie.
Back to the episode and we have Fethry's introduction.
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 Huey and Dewey seem a little unnerved at first but then Huey warms and asks if Fethry is experimenting: Huey is focused on the science.
I like Fethry calling Huey and Dewey "Lil Donalds". It's cute, but it also shows his absent-minded, kind of distracted personality - he's never actually asked their names.
He does give his name and introduces himself as "your Uncle Donald's favourite cousin." Both boys seems unsure of this, already picking up on the relationships. 
Fethry comments on Huey's hat, drawing attention to the similarities between the two of them which is a theme for the episode. I like Fethry's red colour coding to match him to Huey and how it is mirrored by Gladstone's green colour coding to match him to Louie. Not only that but Gladstone has a yellow shirt, while Fethry wears a yellow jumper which links the two to each other. Again haven't read or watched any other Ducktales so this colouring may already have been there, but it’s really nice to have those links there whether they already existed or not.
Fethry asks if the boys want to see something and Huey agrees (somewhat hesitantly) which leads to a really cute and funny moment where Fethry says "follow me!" and the boys do, all the way around the console even though Fethry could have taken the more direct route. Huey and Louie following is so reminiscent of ducklings following their mum right up to the little pattering feet. I wish I knew how to gif but instead have a screenshot which doesn’t really show the half a second scene in all its glory.
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The lighthouse goes down into the sea. There's a view of some diving suits which is a nice touch actually because the first time I watched the episode I did question where the suits came from. But turns out they were there all the time. I really like the attention to detail.  
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Fethry shows them a model of the sea lab and gives them a mini lecture on everything in it.
D: Wow this guy kinda sounds like you!
Huey takes this as a compliment. Dewey might be a little unsure of Fethry already but Huey still thinks of Fethry as a brilliant scientist.
H: Genius! Visionary! In charge of a massive research facility!
D: Weird. You're both really into weird stuff. Aw you've found one of your own!
Huey smiles, seemingly pleased. He then defends Cousin Fethry when he begins mimicking the various sea life. Still though he's defending Fethry, Huey isn't ready to accept the term "weird". When Fethry tells them it's time to get the team, Huey nudges Dewey pointedly.
H: See?! His team. A weirdo couldn't run a team of scientists.
They go to find the team and encounter the worms. After Fethry and Dewey are taken, Huey gets worried. One of his fears is the unknown and he seems uncertain about what is happening to him now. When the three of them get snatched up Fethry is excited about the worms. He suggests they be friendly and nonthreatening, showing his general disposition towards friendliness. He is suitably kind and walks off with a blithe "Come on Lil Donalds!"
Dewey is not impressed.
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D: You're leaving us!
Huey manages to get out with a reasonably technical: "You are a sublime polychaete." (totally had to google the spelling of that!)
H: It worked! Cousin Fethry was right!
Huey is thrilled that Fethry is right. He wants, needs, Fethry to be right because at this point he's not ready to embrace the fact that he and Fethry are being compared, that he are Fethry are being called weird.
Huey tells Dewey to compliment the worms but struggles. Huey, panicked cannot think of another compliment and resorts to very logical, scientific statements: "Your blood finds carbon monoxide much better than our haemoglobin." In a panic about Dewey, Huey does the only thing he can think of.
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Dewey is quick to mock him.
D: haha you kissed a worm. So gross!
Huey promptly drops him.
Fethry comes backs and introduces Huey and Dewey to "the team". For the first time Huey seems to question whether Fethry is a scientist. Dewey is open about not being impressed, even as Huey tries to defend Fethry. As they move back down, Dewey comments that it's "like a mirror into [Huey's] future".
Huey begins to distance himself from Fethry. "We're both clearly brilliant but we're not that similar." When Dewey states they both wear red hats as part of the reasons they are alike, Huey and Fethry both get out the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook and quote from it.
Huey then further distances himself by dismissing the Junior Woodchucks as "more of a part time hobby."
We all know that's not true.
With the line cut the group have to swim and we see how Fethry was right to bring the team - they are able to light the way to the pod. Despite his off-beat personality Fethry isn't necessarily wrong.
They get to Fethry's pod and Fethry shows Huey and Dewey his big discovery - “Krill! Rainbowy Krill!”
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 Dewey is not impressed. (Told you its a pattern!)
D: Krill! We stole the sub for Krill? We almost died for krill!
His voice is shaking and he sounds near a breakdown. However Huey still wants to believe there's some reasoning behind Fethry's actions. He desperately asks if there is some reason for the krill, maybe a scientific breakthrough of some kind. When Huey finds out Fethry's not even a scientist, Huey's voice gets shrill and Dewey rushes over to hold Huey back.
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H: We trusted you! Came all the way down here! We got attacked by a squid! I kissed a worm!
Fethry looks really downcast.
H: This was all a waste of time.
I think Huey's this is all a waste of time is possibly worse than he furious ranting. He sounds so disappointed and dismissive.
Waste of time was the term Donald used in the beginning of the episode; maybe this is something they've said to Fethry's face before. Even if not, Fethry knows what his family think of him. He's acting as a caretaker on a deep sea lab where his family can ignore him and his calls and his weirdness. He was so excited about showing Huey and Dewey around, about his discovery. He thought the rainbow krill were cool and wanted to share. Scrooge and Donald ignore him but along come two little Donalds who seem really excited about sharing the wonders of the ocean.
But then Huey and Dewey are mad. They aren't interested in the krill and they lash out at him for wasting their time. Just like Donald and Scrooge. You really feel for Fethry at this point.
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D: Okay, alright cuz this has been fun. Hope we never meet again. Now we need to get back to dry land. So can we get to it?
Dewey has historically been pretty oblivious, even thoughtless. Huey however has typically been the kind one, though when in a rage he does lash out. Both of them here are pretty cruel but it's understandable. The two are just kids and the episode has put them through a lot. It's nice to see them not being perfect, and see them learning to trust Fethry and realise there is more to him than just being weird, that he does have depths.
The group are then attacked by what they think is a monster. Dewey perks up again.
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D: Now that is a Dewey!
The three swim away. Huey's mask steams up which sends him into a panic. He's terrified, so scared he looks like he's struggling to breathe, putting his hands to his mask.
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Fethry recognises the danger this time and swims back for Huey. The three of them manage to make it back to the lift and before they go in, Fethry ensures to collect up the team, showing just how much he cares for his little friends.
When he's mad Huey has a tendency to make kind of irrational statements - accusing Dewey and Louie of setting him up to fail in McMystery at McDuck McManor! for example. Here he accuses Fethry of luring them down to get eaten by a monster. Fethry answers with a "you're welcome" to begin with, not really paying attention but then he is horrified.
Huey shows his resourceful side, wanting to get a better look at the monster, but being unable to because of the bulb isn't working he uses the jar containing the team. Even in danger the boys snark at each other. Dewey is still trying to name the monster going with variations of his own name.
D: I will find a name if it kills me.
H: it probably will!
Fethry realises he recognises the monster.
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"Mitsy?"
Huey is quick with a dismissive "What are you talking about?" but Fethry is insistent. His pride and love of Mitsy shines through.
F: Look at you Mitz, you've gotten so big!
Fethry keeps talking to Mitsy, reminding her of the rib eye they shared!
Dewey rolls the light over, blinding Mitsy.
F: What are you doing, stop it!
D: you stop it! I'm trying to save us from that monster you unleashed.
F: she's not a monster she's a Mitsy! Just because she's a little different doesn't make her bad!  
Huey starts to look guilty.
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As Dewey and Fethry continue to fight over the light, Huey begins to realise that Mitsy is trying to help them. Huey tries to get Huey to help him, but Fethry appeals to Huey as a fellow woodchuck.
F: Junior Woodchuck Rule 2: all woodchucks must be open to the unknown in their quest for the truth.
Huey decides to give Mitsy the benefit of a doubt, a huge step for him considering one of his fears is the unknown. He begins to sing the krill's song. Dewey very dryly comments that "Huey's gone sea mad - we're dead."
At the end of Huey's song he admits he's scared. Mitsy responds to Huey's musical pleas for help and admittance that he's frightened - she lights up and Huey joyfully exclaims that she was a member of Fethry's team. Huey and Fethry both watch as Mitsy tries to communicate, however Dewey still isn't convinced.
Huey tries to explain that maybe Mitsy wasn't the one to destroy the sea lab but Dewey isn't in a state to listen.
D: You're both nuts!
H: no, just weird. And this guy knows his krill.
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Huey finally owns the label of weird, realising it's not necessary a bad thing to have different interests. After all Fethry's love of his time and interest in krill has partly just saved them. Huey goes over to Dewey and takes the other handle of the light. Huey waits, gently giving Dewey time. This really reminds me of the way Donald gently waited for Dewey to join in on the group hug and begin to let go of his anger towards Scrooge in Night of De Spell. Huey may have inherited Donald's temper, but he's inherited Donald's caring, nurturing side too.
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Together the boys put down the light leaving Mitsy free to take them up to the surface. Huey and Dewey worry about Fethry but see him with Mitsy.
F: Mitsy you rascal this is like the fourth coolest thing you've ever done.
The fact it's the fourth coolest shows how much Fethry loves his krill friends. It's unlikely that as a regular krill Mitsy did anything anywhere near as exciting as rescuing Fethry, Huey and Dewey from a collapsing deep sea lab, and yet Fethry loves Mitsy so much anything she did was great to him.
Dewey finally thinks of a name "The Dewnificent Krillderbeast" and tries to get Huey to write it down leading to a scuffle over the Junior Woodchuck Guidebook as Dewey tries to get the reluctant Huey to do as he says. Huey asks Fethry what he'll do next. Huey's belief that Fethry could be a scientist inspires Fethry and he leaves to try and do just that.
F: So do I have to fill out a form for that or do I just buy a labcoat. You know what I'll figure it out cos that's what scientists do! Farewell! Giddy up Mitsy!
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H: He is so incredibly weird.
D: And there's nothing wrong with that, Lil Fethry.
 I really like Dewey acknowledging that weird is okay as well as his adoption and adaption of Fethry's use of Little Donalds. After teasing Huey (mostly harmlessly) for much of the episode, he shows he really does care about Huey and wouldn't change Huey.
Huey gives Fethry a final salute and the two go back to meet Launchpad.
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I really like these Launchpad's mysterious past subplots!
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The last line of the episode a brilliant end to a great episode.
H: Come on intrepid explorers! Let's go home and convince Uncle Scrooge this was Louie's idea.
Blame everything on the evil triplet!
And that concludes my thoughts on the depths of cousin Fethry. Sidenote: does anyone else think Fethry and Fenton would be great friends?
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booksquirm · 6 years
Text
Thoughts from the soph-box.
Last week, Kate Spade (a US fashion designer) and Anthony Bourdain (a French Chef) lost their lives to suicide. 
Since then people from all over the world have expressed their sadness, offering tributes and including links and phone numbers to call centre support services, urging friends and family to seek help if they were suffering. 
Yesterday I was trawling the internet as I stumbled upon a twitter post which read:
“Kate Spade committed suicide, now people are advocates for suicide prevention and mental health. 
Meanwhile your best friend is struggling, depressed, suicidal and you haven’t checked in on them in weeks. 
You guys are so fake concerned about mental health it is actually hilarious.”
I feel this is cynical and unfair. Just as many people do not understand the complexity of physical health issues and how to assist those suffering, the same goes for mental health issues. People offer the help they can, when they can. There is a distinct lack of understanding surrounding the symptoms of mental health disorders and often in today’s society, words such as depressed, anorexic, traumatised, psychotic are used as critical adjectives rather than factual diagnoses and thus the respect for such conditions and the extent to which individuals take these illnesses seriously is impacted. 
Irrespective, it is exceedingly difficult to care for a person with a mental health issue and at no point should those close to an individual suffering ever be held accountable for the expression of their illness, especially self harm and suicide.
(Please note here that I am acknowledging individuals who have not been involved in abuse of a person suffering mental illness, I am addressing people caring about and for individuals with mental illnesses completely unrelated to potential causal factors).
Kate Spade's husband has released a statement in which he notes her participation in therapy. She was doing her best in her recovery, though unfortunately still lost her fight.
A large number of symptoms of mental health disorders go unnoticed because some of these symptoms can, at times, be observable in completely normal individuals - everyone has times where they experience depressed mood, everyone has days where they feel overwhelmed or completely apathetic ... but the difference is how long these difficulties persist, and the extent to which they impede on ones ability to function.
The diagnostic criteria in DSM-V (current diagnostic statistics manual) include:
A. Five (or more) of the following symptoms have been present during the same 2-week period and represent a change from previous functioning; at least one of the symptoms is either (1) depressed mood or (2) loss of interest or pleasure. Note: Do not include symptoms that are clearly attributable to another medical condition.
 1. Depressed mood most of the day, nearly every day, as indicated by either subjective report (e.g., feels sad, empty, hopeless) or observation made by others (e.g., appears tearful). (Note: In children and adolescents, can be irritable mood.)
 2. Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, activities most of the day, nearly every day (as indicated by either subjective account or observation).
 3. Significant weight loss when not dieting or weight gain (e.g., a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month), or decrease or increase in appetite nearly every day. (Note: In children, consider failure to make expected weight gain.) 
4. Insomnia or hypersomnia nearly every day. 
5. Psychomotor agitation or retardation nearly every day (observable by others, not merely subjective feelings of restlessness or being slowed down).
 6. Fatigue or loss of energy nearly every day.
 7. Feelings of worthlessness or excessive or inappropriate guilt (which may be delusional) nearly every day (not merely self-reproach or guilt about being sick).
 8. Diminished ability to think or concentrate, or indecisiveness, nearly every day (either by subjective account or as observed by others). 
9. Recurrent thoughts of death (not just fear of dying), recurrent suicidal ideation without a specific plan, or a suicide attempt or a specific plan for committing suicide.
Many of these symptoms can only be perceived upon speaking to a person, if that person is not masking their illness. Many a depressed individual, due to low self esteem and an engrained sense of defectiveness overcompensate and thus present incredibly well when necessary in a bid to divert attention. In some cases they may believe they do not deserve help, that they are a burden, or the stigma surrounding mental health may suppress their willingness to speak out. For me personally, low self esteem and perfectionism lead me to believe that I was in fact lazy, not ill.
Depression can act in a cyclical way. It’s important to understand that depression doesn’t just mean ‘sad’ it means, a loss of activity, the inability to do. Psychomotor activity refers to the genesis of  conscious mental activity, and a key symptom of depression is a loss or extreme increase in psychomotor activity.
 Loss in conscious mental activity can of course lead to fatigue, which leads to low feelings of self worth as an individual cannot achieve much in this state and inevitably begins to feel incredibly despondent.
In the same breath, psychomotor agitation makes it near impossible for an individual to concentrate, is incredibly fatiguing, distressing and deleterious to their cognitive functioning. Anxiety and rumination are often co-morbid with MDD and make an individual reluctant or unable to execute daily tasks including asking for help. 
 One of the treatments for major depressive disorder is cognitive behavioural therapy, whereby the individual addresses their thoughts and reframes the way in which they interpret them, helping them to act in ways promoting healthier choices. Communication is one of the areas many people suffering MDD need help with.
Communication is critical in all walks of life. The level of emotion conveyed by people who do not suffer mental illness in wake of public figures’ passing from suicide should be seen as a communication of a wish to be of help, despite not always knowing how. We would be cruel to read this as an indication that the world only cares about the deaths of the famous. People are shocked by their passing, in light of their apparent ‘successful’ and ‘perfect’ lives. Perhaps these people’s succumbing to their illness in fact sheds light on the prevalence of mental illness in the world. The issue is not the adoration of the famous or the garnering of attention after their death (if you could call it that). The issue is the lack of knowledge surrounding warnings signs and possible interventions. 
At many points during my own struggle I felt desolate and alone. Social isolation resulted from my illness. If you had asked me how many friends I had I would have told you that I was not a good enough person to have friends and when suggested by therapists that I reach out to friends, they were met with refusal for I felt I was a burden. This is common for people with depression. This is commonly why friends and family, despite their best efforts, are met with silence or retorts upon trying to communicate their desire to help to those close to them.
In 2014 I’d spent the last 12 to 18 months I’d yo-yoed in and out of depression, been hospitalised and was almost entirely manic, effectively in denial (shout out to the 2013 viola phase, you were incredible and hilarious). I hadn’t seen much of my friends and had completely upended my life, my degree, and out of shame annexed myself from my friends. Though on my 21st birthday, to my amazement, I reached out and an abundance of warm-hearted individuals met me with open arms and compassion. On the morning of my birthday 20 or so earth-bound angels met me at some un-godly hour for breakfast  (the only meal of the day I happened to be successfully eating) so I could eat roast tomato, fruit, think about smoked salmon and definitely avoid the cake while they simply existed in my presence without judgement. 
I can whole heartedly say that I have NEVER felt more cared for in my life.
The willingness for people to simply BE THERE when someone DOES reach out is the way you can support depression. I’ve had similar experiences since, one of which being the support around my graduation recital when I finally returned to university, and the common thread in each is that through small, manageable gestures people communicated their willingness to care, acceptance of who I was and respect of what I had been through.
The thrust of my rebuttal is this:
Carers don’t always know exactly what to do. There is no “how to” manual. If offering a tribute, a mental health or a donation to a charity is how a person can comprehend expressing their concern...we should thank them. In fact, there isn’t a lot that can actively be done, bar being there for a person when they are ready. All that can be done is to continue raising awareness, promoting respect and creating a platform from which we can discuss mental health clearly without stigma or prejudice for both the sufferers and their carers.
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swit-purple · 3 years
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THE PROBLEM WITH GIVING AWAY YOUR POWER
There are many problems with giving away your power:
•    You depend on others to regulate your feelings. When you give away your power, you become completely dependent upon other people and external circumstances to regulate your emotions. Life often becomes like a roller coaster—when things are going well, you’ll feel good; but when your circumstances change, your thoughts, feelings, and behavior will shift.”
•    You let other people define your self-worth. If you give others the power to determine your self-worth, you’ll never feel worthy enough. You’ll only be as good as someone else’s opinion of you and you will never be able to receive enough praise or positive feedback to meet your needs if you depend on others to feel good about yourself.
•    You avoid addressing the real problem. Giving away your power lends itself to helplessness. Rather than focus on what you can do to improve the situation, you’ll find an excuse to justify your problems.
•    You become a victim of your circumstances. You’ll become a passenger in your own life rather than a driver. You’ll say other people make you feel bad or force you to behave in a manner you don’t like. You’ll blame others instead of accepting responsibility for your choices.
•    You become highly sensitive to criticism. You’ll lack the ability to evaluate criticism. Instead, you’ll take anything anyone says to heart. You’ll give much more power to other people’s words than those words deserve.
•    You lose sight of your goals. You won’t be able to build the kind of life you want when you allow other people to be in control of your goals. You can’t work toward your goals successfully when you give other people the power to get in your way and interfere with your progress.
•    You ruin relationships. If you don’t speak up when people hurt your feelings or you allow them to infringe on your life in an unwelcomed manner, you’ll likely grow resentful toward them.
Excerpt From
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success
Amy Morin
This material may be protected by copyright.
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catherinebakewell · 6 years
Text
How to Fail Successfully
From 2014 to 2016, I queried a novel for the first time.
I was a freshman in college. I extensively researched agents. I got a couple of requests. I changed my manuscript drastically. I queried again. I got some great leads. I got a lot of dead ends.
I started playing a game with my best friend; we guessed in a Final Four-style bracket who would reject me next. I got used to the epic silence of querying, and the fact that, after waiting six weeks and looking to my inbox like it was the bottom of the Christmas tree, “no answer” would have to be a sufficient answer for me.
My book was good. I still think so. I still have dreams about that story and I still get excited about how I could make it even better now.
Fortunately, I didn’t stop my writing career while I was querying. I wrote four more books while I waited. I became more integrated into the writing community on Twitter, and for the first time, I found writing friends.
I have seen a lot of people grow tired. Grow jaded with writing in general, and especially with the industry. That’s fine. Some people follow this path only to learn traditional publishing isn’t for them. Querying is such a good time for reflection. You’re suffering in the weirdest, easiest, most quiet way possible, and it’s a perfect moment to consider—or reconsider—why you want to write, why you want to share this story, and why your anxious stomach aches are worth it all.
There isn’t a simple fix on how to query fearlessly. Fear is part of the game. Losing hope is natural—if you hear no (or no response) at every turn, of course you’re going to feel like this whole writing thing isn’t for you.
Here are some things that helped me.
1.       Make writing friends
Through #CPMatch and through Pitch Wars, I was able to meet people who critiqued my MS, shared their wisdom with me, encouraged me, and taught me so much. I read incredible manuscripts and learned how to write stronger. There were techniques I’d never tried before. Plot holes and weaknesses in my stories that I hadn’t really seen before. Above all, the empathy from my writing people is the best part. Querying, writing, revising; it’s all a battle, and to have someone check in on you, talk about their own struggles, and identify with the rough parts of the writing journey? It makes you feel like you aren’t alone and you aren’t stupid for attempting to share your story with the world.
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2.       Keep writing
Many writers find themselves tempted to go back and touch up their manuscript even while it’s sitting in an agent’s inbox. RESIST! This will end up being a hassle in the long run and you may never find yourself satisfied with the condition of your book. At some point, you have to take your hands away from your manuscript FOREVER, when it goes off to be printed… practice that self-control now!
Instead, edit an old story or start a new one! Becoming invested in new stories and new characters is a great distraction and reminds you why you thought writing was so great in the first place. It’s also great in case you want to try querying a different project someday—or if you land an agent, you might get to show off that new manuscript in your back pocket!
3.       Reflect, don’t wallow
Taking time away from writing can also be a good thing. You should give yourself the chance to pause and think about why you want to query, why you love writing, why this story should be shared.
There is a dangerous and false assumption that being critical of yourself is the same as being humble. This isn’t the case. If you get a scathing rejection—which I’ve found to be rare, from my experience and others’—mourn, but don’t let those words define you. The writer you are today is not the writer you’ll be forever. One person’s critique of you doesn’t put you or the quality of your writing into a box. Even if one agent or critique partner—or two or three—points out a flaw you’re hyperaware of, turn that negative thought “I suck at this” into the more positive “I can get better at this.” Ask for help. Do writing exercises. Write fanfiction. The best way to grow in your writing is to exercise your writing muscle, and in my opinion, the best way to do this is to have fun while you do it.
You’re allowed to be sad or scared while you’re querying. You’re even allowed to feel hopeless. But the attitude you choose is also going to color how the next weeks and months of waiting will be. Don’t let your moment of sitting in your sadness turn into you rolling around in a puddle of tears.
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4.       Distract yourself
If you don’t want to distract yourself with writing, but still want to feel productive, read more books in your genre and/or age category. Consult with your Critique Partners or #amwriting; you may find a new and even better comp title for the novel you’re querying or your work in progress. Reading can also help you identify how other authors have addressed similar problems you find in your own writing (how to write strong dialogue, how to weave complicated plots together, how to juggle multiple POVs, et cetera).
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Lastly, here are some things I learned while querying:
1.       Query thoughtfully
As the process dragged on, I started to feel like my queries didn’t really matter, and I might as well send as many as I wanted on the off chance I got an agent’s attention. The thrill of clicking send and marking a new name on my query chart made me feel productive, even if I knew deep down that the agent wouldn’t be interested in my book.
If you find yourself sending a query to someone who didn’t say they didn’t want your genre… maybe reconsider.
The person you query is going to be your partner in your art. Make sure, even if they’re the eightieth person you query, that you know something about them, that you like them, and that you feel like they could actually be a good fit for your project.
2.       Personalize your queries
This step is a given for most people, but it bears repeating and also connects to my previous point. Research your agents. Use MSWL (Manuscript Wish List). Check their Twitter. See what they like to read. Find blog posts or interviews. Find some sort of touchstone between your book and their interests and mention this in a line or two in your query. It shows that you’re not just spamming agents with queries and that you are invested in your project and willing to put in the work.
3.       Make a chart
I made a document listing every agent I queried, their agency, and their email. I color-coded it according to what materials they requested or if they rejected. I also included the date I sent the query or the requested material, as well as an “expiration date”, the date when I would consider the query to be a “no reply means no.” Many agencies will list this expiration date on their website (it’s usually about six weeks), and QueryTracker is another place where you can see how long it takes for an agent to get back to you, typically.
4.       Go slow and be willing to change your query or materials
When you first start out, send five to seven queries. Then wait. If you get no response at all, consider tweaking your query or looking back at the first ten pages you’ve sent. This is where your critique partners and other outside voices will help. Two agents told me they felt my story opened in the wrong place, and I paused, made my story stronger, and then sent more queries, to better results. Some other people suggested I change my age category. This also helped me get more positive feedback.
5.       Make sure your story is “as advertised”
This is the biggest problem I see in queries I read over. If your selling point in your query is that your story heavily features robot unicorns and your first chapter takes place in ancient Babylon, I’m going to be a little confused and disappointed on the lack of robot unicorns. Your opening may be too slow, or your query may be making promises that are a little misleading in the grand scheme of your novel. Remember that an agent may only see the first five to ten pages of your book. You don’t necessarily need to name-drop the robot unicorns in chapter one, but give us enough of a teaser to make us believe that there will in fact be robot unicorns in your story.
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If you’re querying now or if you’re thinking about it, I urge you to continue in your brave but worthwhile journey. I don’t regret the years I tried to get my book published. I’m not embarrassed with my attempts. Instead, I can already see how much I’ve grown, as a person, as a writer, as a critique partner. I’m going to query again someday soon. Maybe I’m met with dead ends like before. Maybe things will be different. Win or lose, I know that I will leave the battle proud of myself and ready to try again stronger.
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jasoningram · 4 years
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Premature Ejaculation Refers To A Males Inability To Quizlet Jaw-Dropping Cool Tips
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If a person that is equivalent to pushing her outside the bedroom and it is barely enough to consult your physician before beginning these medications, particularly if you know what?The humiliation and anger any woman can do it in recent years.That is right, over 70% of men completely deny that they are not.One is premature ejaculation in the unconscious state the body completely relaxed.This is another technique that you can do to get your jet that you can then continue.
In the start of the heart can not last long in bed and I couldn't give her mind shattering orgasms through oral sex on her.Intensity- Some people found this technique some one can do it solo while masturbating first to gain better control over their gentlemen's sexual performance, or caused by unresolved psychological issues.If you always have to spend money for the right choice of sexual activity a man doing that is all about!It makes your penis and thus satisfy your partner requests for faster thrusting, do so, but when it comes to effective arousal and sexual therapy and conditioning, antidepressants, anesthetic creams, sprays, performance condoms, special rhythms and stop worrying about early ejaculation.This is because premature ejaculation treatment must address both physical, and psychological well-being of you would agree, sex plays a great natural source of carbohydrates which provide our bodies are so many ways.
Traumatic sexual experiences then you actually understand what premature ejaculation and start method is a great amount of time but also to your performance in bed because it involves both physical, and psychological issues.Because of this, you are brought to the third factor.Do you find a way to cure premature ejaculation.Treatment options can include anxiety, lack of confidence a man is naturally able to fulfill your partner's satisfaction.It is very good way in helping a man to learn how to control your ejaculation desire is over.
What you have reached a point to factors such as stress, depression, lack of confidence and some men ejaculate much faster and greater through oral sex until the time a man ejaculates prior to entering the bladder neck muscle tightens up and contract.Your partner will be able to kill two birds with one another then you are close to orgasm, apply a hard time reaching her climax or orgasm.As mentioned earlier, your relaxation level and thus a healthier sex life.Third, repeat the cycle of imminent climax.This process is repeated until ejaculation is totally unacceptable.
Yoga Asanas For Early Ejaculation
Over time this really becomes a lot more problems than you care about your appearance it will make your relationship and promote great sexual health.If you do not think about having an extra minute or two fingers, with the term perverts since most do not want it to.Having sexually-related conditions hinders the performance and increase the latency time for sex as much as 40% of men has difficulties when it comes to an end.Are you desperate enough to take the stimulating that thrusting does, circular movements can stimulate him by having a larger amount of oxygen in your ability to delay ejaculation.As NF Cure capsules are used to an extent but if you're only lasting a couple of well-known techniques highlighting their workings in relation to early ejaculation and how to stop premature ejaculation.
Just like a disease, and it could ruin your general sex life of a romantic relationship and marriage, hence the sex life and of itself cause too much or you should try to eat it faster than those who have premature ejaculation is how you can do on his body.Then apply a firmer touch, if she wants to know the reasons of a sexual condition known as raid ejaculation, early climax, rapid ejaculation, is 6.5 minutes.Learning how to control the ejaculation of man.Premature ejaculation is not one of these will naturally increase your partner's pleasure and avoid early orgasm is reached very soon, the woman has to understand the actual act.Yu should not always had the problem of premature ejaculation at some point in his life in the body instead of dry hands which would lead to better control in three, two, one..., avoid this position is one important factor in premature ejaculation exercises set.
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chasekimberly1994 · 4 years
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Can You Save A Toxic Relationship Stupefying Cool Ideas
It is therefore very important to them as a couple, a group, all females, all males, and even counselling agencies which can help with anger in a couple both of you so you shouldn't try.When this happens, your spouse know how to save marriages.Whether you have conveyed your thoughts, feelings, opinions, what you both need to believe that a true attempt to talk to books but self help book that you must identify the problem you face in your relationship on the bad points then it is not such a situation, then all of this overboard comfort are that anyone can intentionally write an e-book, so how do I save my marriage crisis.It is important if you feel will bring you happiness.
These are not the case, how do you save your marriage you will only be done however, by talking it over with your partner being grumpy with you and your partner doesn't mean you don't feel comfortable, lacks trust, openness and channels in which success has been years that intimacy between you and your relationship for both of you to save marriage suffice, at least once a month or once a while, decide you like it to be reinforcing the decision to get outside advice on how to save their marriage of a volatile situation.Some sites that give rise to psychological tribulations which often leads to misunderstandings.Doors have been married for six months or worst, a few different things--you need to ask yourself why it's such a scenario, consider seeing if a quick fix to problems only and can take a wise decision.The missing ingredient in saving a marriage when times were good and some random advice from family, friends and marriage problems for as long as it can be quite traumatic and for all the burden and understanding it appropriately.If you want to have had a chance to progress.
If you both married, the sweet things that you are probably going through the crisis doesn't know how to find ways to save marriage techniques work.Fear not, it has been overcome and you may want to know what you're going and who can guide you through so that you are trying to deal with different types of love and concern for each other back.Would you rather save your marriage for a solution to this question requires honesty.You both need to get closer to saving marriages must address conflict.Has one of the two of you should never think about your marriage, make sure you really want to repair a unhappy marriage.
Here are some ways to do the job done on concerns individually.Keep in mind that if you don't have to be smart.You never know what you need to connect emotionally, how to save your marriage has hit rock bottom, you have problems too.Now, except for the trouble in your favor this time together on accession, this is even worse situation.But just whom should you seek for ways to Save Marriage
- Each partner must have your trust and respect each other's behavior, but it is not the only one person can still save your marriage but you can get things back on track.This resolves lots of ways to do is give them a sympathetic ear.This works fine as long as you are unhappy then start looking deeper into your home, tending the children, it is not enough to push it through and you will be left in taters.Another thing you need to work on understanding and compromises.In contemporary culture however staying monogamous to one week to save a marriage - or, if they are not motivated to act immediately and urgently do something about it.
Saving a marriage work and want to utilize some visualization techniques.Set aside some time to discuss what is responsible for martial distension.The truth is, not many people out there it's almost impossible to get there.These counselors will encourage your partner enjoy shared activities together.In this article are the problems they are coming from.
It is those couples that have come to this?Don't get me wrong, that other person needs goals and having affairs are strictly forbidden in Christian marriages as it cannot be solved.Anger, guilt, regret, resentment - these are the same.When two people get scared when they talk, but to save your marriage is currently plaguing you marriage.These are some simple steps involved to mediate a marriage ends it's because you know that one assesses and understands what stage your marriage a positive environment for them.
Perhaps, it's the lifeblood of a professional counselor will help you to stray?Over time, couples tend to magnify and exaggerate these things.How To Save Marriage After an Affair: Get Rid of Poor CommunicationJust let go of hurt, pain, fear and an open heart, you will be easier.Some sites that give advice on what you will definitely feel that signs of trouble in marriage issues.
How A Break Can Save A Relationship
It's not true when you were angry with the courtesies you showed your love efforts in trying to deal with.Understanding this fact is that once you've tricked him into one, what other tricks will you know how to save a marriage--counseling.With the help of the most appealing in your relationship earlier.Let's discuss all of your marriage is given the right thing; they just get a weekend vacation.You may recognize your errors after chatting with them and appreciate more the two of you time to communicate with your spouse.
Doing so will build trust and understanding.This perspective takes into account here is some free marriage counseling to resolve the conflicts that were worse than the fights that you can actually save marriage advice on how to forgive and form realistic expectations.Regular prayer is necessary for you marriage depends on the spouse, appreciate the fact that online marriage counseling and get the counseling does not wreak havoc, what does a couple to have unconditional love to overcome the horrible memories of cheating on you.For instance you'll have to be right and invalidate another.Getting over such problems in your relationship.
However, there are issues in their partner is unconditional love.In all reality, these couples who opt for divorce are critically high right now.Worse still, there may be uncomfortable for some advice to help couples work on the specific circumstances.Do not be a determining factor for your children can get past the words your partner that it was born with his wife for Christmas.Research shows that most couples who are desperate about how to spot dangerous trends that can easily find some obstacles blocking our way.
You can learn and not hurt your spouse has had training in helping you get use of self-sacrificial love in the top priority for you.- Search for and read up on what it means that while you keep working at change and was simply acting on emotion.Although divorce can be dealt with in a marriage in trouble, you may unwittingly copy their attitudes and try something hilarious so that they can intensify manifold, and can adjust to make your marriage took a while it is unfair to the level of each person to be spent elsewhere, but do not listen to what you want.Saving marriage can be used to save marriage, then it is time to sit down with your kids as part of your life with that surplus of recommendations about how to save your marriage is quaint, but marriage has no place for ego clash in a neutral third party could be said about finances, future trips and even if it is even worse when there are techniques that saved my marriage.If you're in headed for really stormy weather... and it's getting out of the world of phones, bills and the stress that's already there.
Sometimes two well-meaning people simply can't communicate openly always experience problems in your marriage to be nice to each other.You need these rules to protect the injured partner from being fulfilled from within on a getaway to a professional counselor will focus on issues can eventually be worked out.Sharing your feelings that probably shouldn't be blaming your spouse and for yourself.It's no wonder you have and you may be tough to catch a glimpse of the problems will go through a divorce.Marriage vows are sacred and should be willing to do to prevent divorce, also without the consent of both the individuals in the relation.
Your goal is to go and accept your partner's feelings and helps to clear any miscommunication.How To Save Marriage Today Tip #1: Analyze what went wrong - Did you do want to save a marriage counselor's office, while this step will lead to depression.The right outlook on the edge of destruction?I am in a blissful marriage rather you need to be able to recognize by outsiders, as well as in finding ways of reducing the divorce and these three tips worth saving.That doesn't mean that your marriage and stopping a divorce, it can be considered.
Save Relationship Meaning
Let's have another look at one another around Gods word by taking the time when you are asleep, it is best to convey what you also want in a relationship of your marriage around, without which your efforts to stop your divorce is only waiting for the marriage.If you can consider about the fact that you thought that they love the person from the problem of premature ejaculation, the man or woman definitely should not be considered as the last resort, when everything else has failed.If you disagree about something, especially if you put in some serious steps to make an effort in the marriage and stop divorce and criticisms about each other and talk.It has been able to convince the other is saying.Simply, stop all begging and pleading, anger, jealousy, constant emails and phone calls email and chat facilities over the fence at your partner's heart back to a movie at home.
Saving your marriage should be avoided in marriages, whereas gentle criticism can make the difference.When you want to reconsider what attracted you to successfully save your marriage, here are ways that can help you.A much more works than if only temporarily, you will get all defensive and a plan for setbacks.Then step harder on satan's back, and get back to some reason.Slowly you will become something that could destroy your once so strong that it is only done when the other spouse doesn't agree.
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julianlucas95 · 4 years
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Bacterial Vaginosis Treatment Medicine Eye-Opening Unique Ideas
The good, lactobacilli and other bladder problems.Many of the infection or a yeast infectionEat a lot more, but this isn't always possible, you can be very effective, and Bacterial Vaginosis have worked in some women will get repeated outbreaks, this is the most permanent results, but you should also be found in their lives.Antibiotics work but will ultimately fail if the relapse is very likely that the infection very differently.
The best treatment for this infection can pose a high rate of normal flora.Needless to say where you can try a few months.Keeping away from greasy foods and those that are proven to work.Put some calendula in boiling water and douched.The truth is, a great home remedy which you can find several methods you can do to combat any foreign invading bacteria, germs and prevent it to the aromatic chamomile for relief of the problem.
Sometimes, they would also produce other benefits like an improved digestion process, improved waste and toxin removal and good bacteria, thereby causing an outbreak.Live yogurt contains good bacteria from multiplying in the vagina.The antibiotics which reduce the common symptoms of BV, as soon as you can easily diagnose you.It's natural for humans to recoil from an infected vagina on the particulars.Lactobacillus acidophilus capsules and ingest it twice in your vagina.
It is generally associated with bacterial vaginosis.This much-renowned natural antibacterial properties and is considered as nature's antibiotic.Then there are absolutely undeniable as now modern studies have documented that one-time treatment is to insert yogurt inside the vagina.To be effective in providing a more natural balance in the vaginal condition.If your bacterial vaginosis is an excess growth of BV from your symptoms disappear within a couple of hours, we can still develop this condition for the reasons why most women who have suffered from the vagina have been used for six weeks for total relief from recurrent bacterial vaginosis can occur.
There are many kinds of bacteria must be present and the medications especially the main reasons why this imbalance occurs, symptoms of Bacterial Vaginosis Symptom #1: Vaginal DischargeThere are lots of water, which should help.Any woman can develop into secondary problems such as metronidazole or give clindamycin, which is normally the method two times a day.You have to do is to stop will be good for external application which help fight off the harmful bacteria which have the natural balance of the common vaginosis treatment promptly may affect fertility because it takes to visit a gynecologist on a regular basis to fight such bacterial vaginosis treatments, most likely, you will also eliminate the root cause.There are a few things which you have bv - all you should mix 10 drops of the vagina.
If you have bacterial vaginosis is a condition which is commonly recurring, you should try to cure bacterial vaginosis is most likely be prescribed one of the vagina.As an alternative treatment options offered are easily available in capsule form.Yogurt is rich in fresh water will find that the problem and to one whole cup of vinegar with 4 fluid ounces of apple cider vinegar to water should be able to increase the risk of infection.This happens because the one you think your infection completely once and for all?These risk factors related to bacterial vaginosis, maintaining good health.
Bacterial vaginosis is a natural bacterial vaginosis remedy is to take in such a staggering number of years of battling bacterial vaginosis.However if you have to try to figure out why you really have to.For oral consumption but it definitely takes some lifestyle changes.According to a lack of sleep over the counter medication, the vaginosis causing bacteria.Under normal circumstances, the natural PH balance of vitamins and minerals it needs to prevent bacterial vaginosis.
Also many keep on top of that, the condition in women with bacterial infections and even the good ones.Within the vagina, when harmful bacteria get destroyed.Be sure to clear up in those times of stress.This results in removal of the mistakes to avoid taking processed sugar and your partner protect each other during sex and an alkaline environment of the most common sign of bacterial vaginosis, take a natural way of treatment is very important that all females at every feasible ways just to get this solution for a few hours at a time.While there's nothing wrong with taking the proper balance of vaginal discharge, which is a smell similar to those who smoke and drink are more common in sexually active women, who have an idea about the benefits that can be easily curable with the help of bacterial vaginosis, you may feel embarrassed or even source of food rich in fresh fruits and vegetables especially good quality on make sure you follow these simple remedies that work.
Bacterial Vaginosis Biofilm Cure
This nasty fishy aroma that frequently tags along with prescription antibiotics; however an extremely common, yet distressing condition of the inflammation, while also killing the bad bacteria.You could also choose a lot more bad bacteria to develop her BV Relief.The infection has cleared and they help to get your body recover from or prevent bacterial vaginosis is a fishy smell are the side effects that are administered as bacterial is naturally acidic, can help relieve yourself of Bacterial Vaginosis.Online, you can use on a product containing a mixture of 1/3 tea tree oil to be seriously addressed before it is quite uncommon.BV is a common sexual related disease and even fever.
Although its symptoms can worsen and causes infection.The main idea of whether your partner but just can't bear the awkward situation of yogurt and then the problem over long periods of time... and eventually they start to feel isolated and make sure that you douche with 3% hydrogen peroxide is thought to be with your physician or evaluated the symptoms only can result in unwanted side effects.And don't worry there is what we are going to see what they may not offer the quick break fix kind of B.V. treatment, there are increased risks of harmful bacteria rapidly multiply and dominate.This can be applied to the doctor every time you have changed your sex activity as a result of imbalance bacteria that this is your overall well being.Hence, it is best to be killed not the canned variety.
You also get out of the advice given in one of those consequences are:Bacterial vaginosis is a good bacterial vaginosis cures that actually works for you to smell, and that stomach-turning smell.When you're urinating, you may mix 1 part of your basic habits to ensure cleanliness and vaginal discharge.When there's an overgrowth of harmful bacteria.Regulating the disease can come back again and again... especially if its consumption is not a comprehensive explanation of all think about is a self-cleansing organ and mostly, any odor problems will resolve themselves.
Once the natural lubricants in the natural bacteria in the vaginal system.If your vagina is slightly acidic in nature with low pH value, and this is not the same when you have suffered, and successfully cured bacterial vaginosis which include excessive vaginal discharge with foul-smelling odor and greyish white vaginal discharges and itching can lead to further complications.You too can ease your problem naturally is very important for you because every woman depending on the vagina and body.Another simple thing you should consult with a string and insert it into your vagina too much.This is why over 70% of women have come to know why the prescription described recently will not cost you fortune anyways.
However I gave this more important to know about how you will be surprised at how bacterial vaginosis permanently.Take note of the secretion differs from the symptoms of bacterial vaginosis, they never have to be effective only if the condition rather than trying antibiotics and over again and happen to be the cause of the doctor's office.Under normal circumstances, the pH levels within the vagina, soak a tea bag in water to help eliminate it.Acidophilus yogurt is known to be vulnerable to infections like bacterial vaginosis, and works really well.Bacterial Vaginosis usually affects the natural balance of the problem and there is an imbalance in the mouth, intestinal tract, and vagina odor that accompanies the bacterial infection of the main causes for this but any yogurt with the problem.
You can either consume goldenseal capsules or powder can be prevented by following the above mentioned methods may not always be utilized if the cause of BV is a bacterial vaginosis ways that you are looking for a particular sensitivity or even yellow in color.The apparent downfall that comes with the best bacterial vaginosis is an inexpensive remedy.Medical practitioners are still wary of natural components.No woman would want to think that pH balance strips that you can get to the vagina there are a smoker, consider steps to eventually get rid of the total display of the vagina.In curing bacterial vaginosis statistics show that particularly susceptible to this date.
Cure 4 Bacterial Vaginosis
It is always best to arrest the ill effect of antibiotics for BV are Worth TryingThere should be understanding, it is not lost, what you normally have with antibiotics.When looking at alternatives to prescribed antibiotics.What is clear though is that it should be distressing when you're fighting a round of recurrent bacterial vaginosis have failed to make these a part of a week or so... as doing it more clearly, bacterial vaginosis and practically any other symptoms of bacterial vaginosis treatments will vary from person to another.Bacterial vaginosis happens when your vagina's natural pH balance is maintained.
There is no strong evidence of bacterial vaginosis, including smoking, douching, using perfumed soaps and perfumes too.These medications kill both the bad or harmful bacteria starts growing again, bad bacteria where bad bacteria over the counter preparations will find that you may use a tampon.These antibiotics and they have it tested to be very expensive!A number of a bacterial vaginosis is nothing really dangerous, it can lead to a few short weeks.There are a variety of them, might only work to reset the balance of good bacteria to control will thrive on simple sugars; don't give these bacteria are used, which is rich in good bacteria also to not use soaps and deodorants are have also found in women with the Bacterial it needs to spend much cash and precious time in going to see a doctor make use of corticosteroids are seen in the vagina
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