#Witcher modern

[araneapeixes]

witcher giiirrllll

[thedemonofcat]

“What do you do?” Geralt asks, trying to be conversational with the beautiful man he had somehow gone home with last night.

Julian looks at him incredulously over breakfast for what feels like forever and then says, “…I’m a singer.”

“Oh, local?” Maybe Geralt could go to a show.

“No, in town for a gig. Leaving first thing tomorrow.”

“Oh.”

That was disappointing. He knew it was only one night of fun, but he had hoped to try his luck and ask Julian out.

“If you want, I could give you my number. We could text?”

“I’d like that.”

———

Jaskier has no idea how he stumbled upon the one man on the continent who doesn’t know he’s a popstar, but he’s rolling with it.

At some point, Jaskier had to know this was coming. He and Geralt had been watching TV when one of his own performances appeared on the screen.

“Hey, Julian,” Geralt said, his tone laced with curiosity.

Jaskier braced himself. It was only a matter of time before Geralt put the pieces together.

“That musician—Jaskier—kind of looks like you,” Geralt remarked.

[wehavekookies]

First of all, how are these five years old already.

[lansalla]

ok guys, but in Modern AU Jaskier and Radovid would still be an ideal couple

[fangirleaconmigo]

Modern AU where Jaskier posts all of his song to youtube. He doesn't have very many hits so he doesn't think much about taking them all off one day when he is rethinking his social media strategy.

He is shocked when his handsome but introverted neighbor (Geralt is his name) calls him at one am panicking. (The man has never even used his number. Jaskier came up with some painfully transparent excuse about a neighborhood watch just to get him to take it.)

Geralt's daughter Ciri has woken up with a nightmare and apparently the only thing that gets her to sleep is Jaskier's singing. However, Geralt is panicking because can't find his videos. He rambles about not being able to find them anywhere and he feels stupid, bad at social media, he shouldn't have called, etc.

Jaskier is intrigued. "I didn't even know you knew about my music."

"You mention it every time I see you in the hall."

"Oh, you are unbearably blunt. Touche, touche. In my defense, I didn't know you listened when I rambled on."

"I do." His neighbor sounds affronted.

"Alright then."

"Is that a yes? You'll sing to her?"

Jaskier isn't done questioning him. "You really play her my music?"

*Pause*

"She hears your music."

"How."

"I might listen to your music at night. To wind down. She just overhears. She's gotten used to it."

Jaskier feels quite smug. "Well alright. Anything for my fans. Put the little one on."

Geralt rolls his eyes but smiles and puts the phone on speaker. Ciri shrieks with delight to hear Jaskier's voice. After she falls asleep, Geralt sneaks out of her room whispering a thank you.

"You know," Jaskier says playfully. "My voice is better live. I could come over sometimes to sing you lullabies in person."

Geralt is glad you can't hear a blush over the phone.

"Yes. Ok."

"Yes?" Jaskier crows.

"Yes. I'd like that."

--fin

Inspiration

[humblebardd]

Jaskier: you know why I called you in here, right?

Geralt: yeah, because I accidentally sent you a dick pic—

Jaskier: *stops pouring two glasses of wine* accidentally??

[twistedappletree]

jin ling: *blasting ‘good luck, babe!’ by chappell roan in his room for the 39374737373th time in a row*

jiang cheng in the kitchen, rubbing his temples: which lan kid do i have to beat up now?

[spielzeugkaiser]

[MASTERPOST] Roach steals Jaskier the show, Jaskier has a nice community and the chat is thirsting for Geralts arms. 👀

[its-bread-bitch]

Modern Geraskier would be Jaskier in the sluttiest, most colorful fashion forward outfits imaginable, serving cunt 24/7 and Geralt in one hoodie/t shirt that’s falling apart and only gets washed once a month. Geralt is not serving cunt. He’s giving 1AM Walmart depression run with ‘tism rizz that only and VIOLENTLY affects Jaskier.

[geraskierfanficprompts]

Prompt 70

Jaskier is the worst roommate Geralt could ever ask for. He comes home at odd hours of the night, constantly makes noise and chatter, and he brings home random strangers almost every damn night. It'll be three in the morning when Jaskier stumbles in, drunk off his ass, heeled shoes loudly clicking against their floor as he meanders about, squinting and knocking things over. At least he has the decency to mumble "Sorry" every time he breaks something, but is he apologizing to Geralt, or apologizing to the damn mop? He talks to himself, he sings to himself, he sings as a hobby, he sings as a job, he plays his lute/guitar loudly all throughout the day and night, he even talks in his damn sleep. Constant humming, singing, talking, muttering, whispering. Hookups and flings and fuckbuddies galore, both women and men. Not that Geralt cares, it was just something he observed. They'd steal his food, or use up the shower when Geralt was meant to be getting ready for work, or they'd leave and keep the door unlocked. The worst was when Jaskier's bachelor of the night mistook Geralt's bedroom for Jaskier's bedroom and very happily cozied up and went to sleep in Geralt's bed. Naked. Geralt didn't even care if he was high, drunk, or just dumb, he threw him out all the same. When Geralt's girlfriend, Yennefer, breaks up with him, he is comforted by Jaskier of all people. Coming home tipsy and without a shirt, and yet still sitting down next to Geralt and giving him a thoughtful, long, deep pep-talk. Maybe he isn't all bad, after all. Geralt is the worst roommate Jaskier could ever ask for. Don't get Jaskier wrong, Geralt is unbelievably easy on the eyes, but that's pretty much all he has. Geralt always looms silently in the dark, offers brutal remarks at best and grunts at worst, and for some reason always has a little blood on him. It'll be three in the morning when Jaskier stumbles in, drunk off his ass, and Geralt will just walk out of the shadows with an insanely deep "Did you remember to lock the door?", scaring the bleeding daylights out of him! He walks quieter than a damn cat! He should wear a bell like one! Fuck's sakes! Geralt's ~lovely~ comments are always harsh but sadly never truly unprompted. Jaskier will get stuck on a line and ask aloud for help, momentarily forgetting his only recent company has been Geralt, and Geralt will sometimes oblige him with an answer, such as "Can you shut up for five minutes?" "It's too late for this shit." "I hate it." So on and so forth. Jaskier learns to stop asking... Mostly. Jaskier went to shave one time, and found blood in the sink. He looked over at Geralt and asked him if he had cut himself shaving. Geralt said no. Jaskier REASONABLY asked why there had been blood in the sink, and got the answer "Work." WORK?????? "And your job is what?! BLEEDING INTO SINKS!?" and yet Geralt was already walking out the door. But then one night he comes home, to find Geralt waiting for him - Silently, alone in the dark, just sat there. Like always. Weirdo. - demanding his half of the rent. Fuck. Fuck, Jaskier completely forgot- Jaskier starts panicking. He explains how he doesn't have the money, that some of his latest gigs have backed out on him or refused him pay for bullshit reasons and he didn't earn as much as he expected to, and begs to not be kicked out. He's surprised when Geralt calms him down from his spiral, and tells him to take a deep breath and wash away his tears - Shit, when did he start crying? - He comes back and Geralt sits him down and explains he'll cover the entire rent this month, his work had gone extra well recently. He knows what it's like for people to pull out pay or suddenly ignore your deal, and won't hold it against Jaskier, but expects him to be able to pay next time. Jaskier is so overjoyed he hugs Geralt. And Geralt lets him. Maybe he isn't all bad, after all.

[cod-dump]

Nik: History was second on my list of favorite subjects when I was studying.

Price: What was first?

Nik: Geography. The atlas was bigger, and it was easier to hide a bottle of vodka behind it.

[churchofpossum]

I don't have a happy new year thing for this year bcs it sucked and I am just happy it is over. So here's one from last year, no idea if I ever posted it here. So happy new year to you, may all your resolutions come true.

[thedemonofcat]

At the park, Jaskier runs into his ex from college, and it’s awful! Geralt is somehow even hotter, funnier, and sweeter than he remembers. And he’s got a fucking child, which probably means there’s a partner somewhere around here.

Jaskier tries his best to be polite and nice—especially to Geralt’s kid—but he can feel Geralt’s eyes burning holes in his skull.

All at once, Jaskier is reminded that it’s HIS fault they broke up. He was too needy and annoying and eccentric. Too much.

***

Geralt runs into his ex from college, and it’s awful! Jaskier is somehow even more beautiful, kind, and witty than he remembers. And he probably doesn’t have the baggage that a divorced, single dad like Geralt has.

Geralt tries not to openly stare, but it’s hard. Jaskier is captivating. Especially when he’s being so good with Geralt’s kid.

All at once, Geralt is reminded that it’s HIS fault they broke up. He was too taciturn and moody and downright mean at times. Not at all the kind of person Jaskier deserves.

"Let me guess, you ran into Jaskier?" Yennefer asked, her tone laced with dry amusement. She was Geralt’s ex-wife and Ciri’s mother, but despite their romantic history, they’d remained close friends. Their relationship had never quite worked out, but the bond was still there.

"How did you know?" Geralt asked, genuinely curious. Yennefer always seemed to have an uncanny ability to read him like an open book. It was a skill that left him both impressed and a little unsettled at times.

"You only ever get that look when Jaskier’s involved," Yennefer replied, raising an eyebrow. "You had it for an entire month when one of his songs went viral."

Geralt groaned, rubbing a hand over his face. "Is it that obvious?" he muttered.

"You mean the fact that you look like a kicked puppy?" Yennefer crossed her arms, smirking. "Yeah, it’s pretty obvious. So, what happened? Did you two talk? Awkward small talk? Did you at least tell him how devastatingly handsome he still is?"

Geralt shot her a half-hearted glare. "No, I didn’t mention that."

Yennefer rolled her eyes. "Maybe you should’ve. Then you wouldn’t be standing here sulking like some lovesick teenager."

[viktoriaashleyyx]

I wasn't tagged but I found this and want to do it.

Rules: Make a poll with 5 of your all-time favorite characters and then tag five people to do the same. See which character is everyone's favorite.

No pressure tags but I would like to see yours:

@farintonorth @matrixsss @1800naveen @merwgue @ladythornofrivia

[fandom-junk-drawer]

Modern Day Geralt and Jaskier being two halves of the same idiot

[na-mmu]

Jask in Modern AU