#WITH THE RED FUCKING HEART EMOJI IT was so funny

[perilegs]

love visiting my grandma and letting her talk about whatever "don't talk to cops" will do ma'am "did you know. the night your cousin died. she invited her sister, her mother, and your father over. none of them showed up. none of them even asked why. i still haven't been told the real reason she died. when my mother died, we were allowed to look into the casket but i din't want to do that because i wanted to remember her the way she was and not how she looked in death. covid was at its peak when your cousin died, and that had something to do with why her casket was closed. i would have liked to see her for myself." ... "oh! did you hear what my neighbour did, you will not believe this--"

[thegreatyin]

i don't know what you're talking about. look at them. they're fine. they're so fucking fine right now.

communal correspondence lessons are going great, thanks guys

[ardentpoop]

broader fandom’s cartoon supervillain singular-d*stiel-naysayer version of jared is pretty funny though

panel clip with jensen being asked a Gay question and reacting like a belligerent bear being poked with a stick and jared cutting in to be like Well Let’s Move On so the mood doesn’t get even more uncomfortable and everyone in the tags is going “fuck off j*red we almost had him we almost cut through the CW Censorship Committee’s evil spell that has our sweet sensitive just-like-dean boy in its thrall before you homophobically interjected. kys ugly!”

panel clip with jensen going I love jared he is my boy forever we like all the same things and we would both love to play those brothers again for 15 more years (author’s note: god forbid) we’ve been thru so much shit together which is why we’ll always be in each other’s lives. heart eyes emoji.

and the broader fandom’s going listen jensen we know you secretly despise that man bc you are secretly queer (author’s note: inappropriate; wildly speculative) and thus morally superior to him (author’s note: incorrect). here’s who you can recast as sam when you are called on to executive-produce the Dean Fucks Bitches And Explodes God Dean And Cas Turn Super Weenie Hut Jr’s Into A B&B spinoff series. in fact why don’t we replace sam entirely with an elf sidekick named squiggledorf who chirps aggrieved one-liners about how In Love dean and cas are every time he’s onscreen. I have some other brilliant ideas that you simply must take under advisement my liege please don’t shut my mic off.

[moongoopy]

no way out

cont: reader has lost about everything so why not lose themselves too?

c/w: reader has anxiety and depression, dubcon, reader getting kidnapped, yandere characters, reader is an artist, death (not reader or the duo), dark content, family problems, blood, reader constantly relapses from self harm, manipulation, harassment (not from duo)

a/n: damn thats crazy. funny how i end it almost the same like my other scenario lolololol, reqs open!

c: geto x reader x gojo

it was the last year of college and it was like you slaved away at your school work that it was numbing to even do your hobbies.

the light in you was dying that your heart should've stopped years ago.

no parties can save you.

you threw away the invitation for the college party, everything was blur to you. too much responsibility on your shoulders and no shoulder to cry on, your roommate no less too busy with his own life to go fuck himself over some girl he broke up with and you slip away everytime you were close to talking to him. he wouldn't listen anyways, head too busy in the clouds as he loses himself again.

the miscalls from your family didn't bother you anymore, it was aggravating to text them back everytime they remembered you so you pretend such a nuisance doesn't exist until it's too late.

"atleast pretend to care"

you told yourself in the mirror, eye twitching from your toothbrush that fall at your feet when your hand collided with the sink. you were worse for wear, eyebags getting darker as you thumbed through social media and letting a few minutes pass before picking up the brush.

instead of calling back, you left a long line of texts with another brand new line of excuses to shut them up with a bunch of emojis for some normalcy. you cleaned up the brush before applying another line of toothpaste onto it and slumped, remembering how money was also running low. thankfully, you didn't share money with your roommate or anything but inflation was upon us.

no way you wanted to ask from your family. they fared well but it was like a hit list on how much you'd ask them and that when you get back home, they'll use it against you and scream in your face while you're strung up limbly like a doll by not responding at all. a response is asking for a fight, no response is to defuse their thoughts by letting them pile ontop of you until they move onto another thing to complain about.

you nearly choke at the taste of blood and pulled away from your toothbrush, red coated your tongue and the gums of your teeth before they quickly get washed off including your grimy face.

another shower may do you good before you worry more about other things. should it be saving up more money or that you haven't come to work for two days now?

oh, this is killing you, why couldn't you just turn the cutter towards your neck? you'd sob so loudly when the blood on your thighs washes over and the cuts burn and twist your skin in and out that you desperately grabbed onto the shower walls. staring down at your scars that barely heal, you made sure to pick pants that wouldn't bother your battered skin. your mind lingers again, the pressure of the water against your head calmer than the caress of your mother's hand combing through your hair.

how did it went downhill in your life?

the folks here were seperated into systems of the typical tropes of college but you weren't treated that badly. there were stares and badmouthing but it never harmed you. so college wasn't the problem.

or maybe it was the relative that passed where you bawled so hard over? yet, you'd never really known them, having correlations towards your passion and attitude only. seemingly called a reflection of them by your other family members but the memory of said late relative lingers in your head sometimes like the wax that's left after the flames took it out but it can only be reshaped if you want to.

but you never pried into the past of that relative so it couldn't be.

you lost yourself way before the impending family problems and countless homeworks you had that the addicting press off the cutter felt more like home than home ever was.

no, dont go back there, it wont help.

drying yourself off, you decided you should atleast take the night shift. clothes tossed on, you couldn't slump around this time. you had something due in a week so maybe work was better to focus on at the moment. passing your roommate's room, you nearly stumbled out the door. night was fast aporoaching this time, it made you ill. the sun or the moon was something you could tell apart from the slow days that passed, without it was living like you're dying.

you took the shortcut, a creepy alleyway but if you were quick; you didn't have to deal with any drunkards and steadily walked. you clutched your earphones in your hand as you tried to listem for any noise that can ruin the night and jumped back to somebody that reached out for you.

"hey there..!"

the man drawled, oh god.

he was drunk or rather high with how hard he was clutching something in his hands but nonetheless it creeped you out, you walked hurriedly away from him.

it was amazing on how stupidly quick he was. his eyes were rolling to the back of his head and drool smearing his lips as he pursues you. your sling bag slipped from your arm which was held tight incase you needed to hit him.

the road down was getting slippery just a bit near to the cornerstore where you worked at, you could dissappear through the backdoor incase he gave chase. or was that a bad choice? he'd know where you work at if he remembered a part of you. thats why you didnt want to yell back incase he recognizes it if he scuttles into your work place and do god knows what there. not a lot of people were around at the hours you work at too.

tears spilled from your eyes, you always were the fearful type. thats why you havent died, just the thought of dying was perfect for you but never the action. you could die in this situation, what if he had a knife. you didnt want that. such an unflattering way to die by some weirdo whose name will be forgotteen after a few days of town talk.

you wanted to die but not this, no!

you swerved the corner and you heard the man gasp.. or choke?

you turned back immediately and another man was holding him by the throat, slamming him back on the graffitied wall with a dangerous glare towards the creep.

"get the fuck out of here!" was enough for the man to whimper and cry, running away back to the alleyway and his footsteps faded away slowly but if you just listen a little closer, he was really running for his life in his drunken stupor.

the stranger's fist was a bit bloody, you didnt know where he had hit himself, hell was that even his blood?

"shit, thank you.."

you exhaled sharply, you had held your breath so long eversince you had turned around. your heart beating so fast to what you thought was gonna happen if the creep caught up with you. this white haired stranger smiled widely, a bit too wide for almost beating up a man and walked towards you.

"you okay? theres been a lot more creeps lately. that must've shaken you up, do you need..?"

he opens his arms up to which you shifted akwardly, hand on your arm. should you? he saved your life and you haven't hugged anybody for a while. hell, you needed something to stop your panic and nearly fell right into his arms. he chuckled, rubbing your back in comfort as he fumbles with something in his bag in the other hand.

"where were you headed? i'll take you there. who know what other weirdos are out here."

you nodded slowly, feeling more at ease when both of his arms wrap around you. you wanted to stay in his chest for a while, scent so nice to inhale but you pulled away swiftly. wow, nearly caught yourself being the creep, this was revolting. you haven't felt affection in the longest time that some stranger's arms were what stabilize you, it was almost embarassing. you might as well ask him to bed you with how you nearly nuzzled into him.

you turned around and he slipped his fingers between yours which was a bit peculiar.

he laughed boyishly, putting his hands up defensively.

"sorry, its just instict. im worried about you!"

looking at him again, he was very pretty. such nice lashes fluttering at you as he utters his words and you shook your head almost mechanically. you dont get a lot of nice strangers like this often, it nearly made you feel too relaxed. it was fine, he probably goes through this with other people that walk alone at night and get disturbed by whatever.

"i'm kinda late now to my work.. but its fine, can you back me up?" he did a thumbs up before walking with you, finally turning the corner and seeing the signboard of the convenient shop lit up. you looked up at him, wanting to thank him again before one of his arms slip behind your waist and your vision becomes blurry.

a car drove past, stopping beside the two.

your limbs felt heavy and you started seeing black and he held you close.

"don't worry, i'll do more than back you up."

------------

this was warm. it felt too warm like a mother's womb. or was that a strange way to describe this feeling? maybe it was more thicker than the blankets you had back at your home or maybe it wasn't your blankets at all?

you woke up in a sweat, head aching with great pain as you let your eyes adjust to the dark.

what was going on?

why was the stranger that helped you was here? legs held to his chest as he watches a movie while another stranger combs through your hair and he was so close, you'd nearly scream. chains rattle and your feet feels so cold. you were so disoriented that whatever noise you managed out of you made the stranger from earlier made him whip his head back.

"it's okay, y/n. we'll explain."

he moved so quick that he was right next to you, gripping your chin so suddenly which made you back up. he held onto you by your clothes and it made the fabric stretch, these weren't your clothes either. just what the fuck was going on?! you screeched, tearing away from him and it made the other stranger hold onto the other's wrist.

"satoru, don't act like a hooligan. you're scaring them"

the one named 'satoru' backed off, chuckling and putting his hands up defensively like how he did before except the look in his eyes were so much more carnal than ever before.

"cmon, its natural to get excited to have your plan work out. on such a random night and way more early than your intended timing, suguru?"

it was like a challenge for 'suguru' to bite back but he couldn't care less and looked back at you. it was eerie. his eyes a swirl of purple and such an illusion had you staring back into them which gave him a chance to touch you even more where he adjusted your clothes and patting them back to how it originally look.

"how'd you feel, darling? i'll explain, we three go to same college, remember us?"

you only had to a bunch of people remembered in your head that anymore than that, you dont bother to remember but their names were farmiliar. people do talk about them all the time so would you shake your head or nod? nonetheless, satoru butts in and thumbs your lips.

"so? speak up, your voice's too pretty to just nod as a response~"

you pulled away, a rush of tears rolling down your face at the realisation of how messed up this situation was. two men in this cold room. you were kidnapped. you didn't know whether to scream or bite back when they started cooing and wiping at your tears. it felt so insulting when they talked like you weren't there, you wanted to quale with anger but your eyes snap back to the shackles on your feet. they notice that you knew, suguru shoves his finger onto satoru's lips before he said something else that could trigger you.

"well, sweetheart. i know all of this can be scary but none of this is to hurt you-"

"how the hell, what the hell do you mean by that? you kidnap me to just look at me, is that what you're telling me!?"

that came out in one breath that you paused, your sobbing stop a bit. this was bad. oh no, you weren't rational. well, you were never rational but in this situation with two strangers from college, they could easily chuck you in a body bag and call it a day. your sniffling gets louder when suguru pressed his thumb into your cheek and turned your head towards him.

his expression was almost indescribable. was he angry? was he amused? was he planning things? this was making you dizzy. they might talk about killing your right here right now too as they had no shame to cover up their plans of kidnapping you. but a small huff was let out from his lips as he held your face so tenderly.

"i know, this situation cam be scary but we've seen you around college. your artwork is just astounding and we wanted to go look for you, such an artist should hear our praise from us and yet you were nowhere to be found." satoru's brows quirked up when your eyes started gleaming a bit but blinking fast to try to hide some care into his words.

"when we found out how you've been so down in your mental issues, it saddens us. your teachers told us how you looked deeply affected by them. that you've been so lonely.." your chest starts heaving when he got so close to your face and your feet kicked the floor to slip away from him only for satoru to hold you from behind.

"we decided to keep you here as our little darling."

you blinked up, eyes twitching.

so they only saw you as entertainment that you were about to push them away from you and spit at them until satoru held your hand and kissed it, taking in your scent.

"sure, its the most foul thing to ever be called by us but we promise you're gonna enjoy it here!"

his arm slips from behind your neck and pulled you close to your chest, snickering when you tried to get away from him. his lips inch close to your ear and he whispers.

"we want to make you feel much better, away from everything you're experiencing and we want to talk about your passion too. wouldn't you like that? we'll provide it all for you. just say the word~"

your eyes nearly roll to the back of your head from the tears you squeezed out painfully. this had to be a joke. what was even going on anymore? your life had to be an absolute joke, you should've joined that one relative in death too.

but a life with them where your problems are almost nonexistent was just peaceful, did you died to get into this position. your crying had calmed down again. you looked up at them in worry, were they really telling the truth? a kiss was pressed softly on the forehead by suguru and his smile reached his eyes with such tenderness.

"you need time to process this, you can go back to sleep and think about it when you wake up.."

"orrrr enjoy your favourite!"

satoru popped open a bag from the restaurant you liked to go to but haven't in a while and the smell was just strong enough to taste it. your eyes linger to a pillow suguru held out for you and you'd nearly keel over. it was your pillow from your dorm and it made your head swirl in confusion.

just who are these two? why do they know so much when they heard you through passing? there was so much questions that they shut down with a kiss and slot their bodies right next to you.

but one thing was certain, you're not getting out of this soon.

[skribbyposts]

Another zosan post bc they invade my thoughts every waking moment !! also i'm typing on mobile so this might be weirdly formatted

anyways, hc that Sanji is the MOST TOUCHY DRUNK to ever exist and he's all over all of his crewmates all the time. in addition to this, Sanji is also a fucking horrible lightweight. like.... tipsy after two beers lightweight. Sanji also YAPS to whoever's nearest to him about everything and anything that comes to his mind. Zoro is his main victim all of the time and does not appreciate it (yes he does, hes so gay) and its so funny to the rest of the crew b/c he has to peel a rambling sanji off of him while blushing so much he looks like a really tan tomato.

Nami + Usopp appear briefly here b/c i love their friendship so much heart emoji!!! <3333

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ugh, marimo, get off of me."

Zoro sighs from his position pressed against the edge of a bench, having what is arguably the worst time ever in the corner of some random bar he's been dragged to by the rest of the crew.

"I'm not on you, cook. move your goddamn leg."

"No, you move your leg."

Zoro tries in vain to shuffle away from the lanky limb draped across his lap, narrowly avoiding spilling his beer all across said limb.

The blonde always got touchy when he was drunk, plastering his entire body on the nearest person and talking their ear off for the remainder of the night.

Somehow, it was always Zoro who ended up with a tipsy Sanji draped over him, his breath smelling strongly of cheap liquor as he rambled about god knows what.

Zoro sighs again, resigning himself to his fate as the blond proceeds to hook his heel around one of Zoro's legs and pull himself forward so that he's pressed up against the other man's side. Zoro feels Sanji's elbow poking his arm. He tells himself it's very unpleasant.

"Yknow, you're coming with me to get... uh... groceries tomorrow. Yeah. We need bread."

"You've told me that three times tonight."

"Well, I'm telling you again, you algae head." Sanji lolls his head back to look at the ceiling, using the hand not trapped between them to loosely gesture at the man next to him.

"Nice one," Zoro deadpans.

"Oh, fuck you," Sanji replies, and then rests his head on Zoro's shoulder. "you want hamburgers for lunch tomorrow?" he asks over the loud murmur of the bar.

Zoro, however, does not reply. Instead, he stares straight ahead and tries to focus on the fact that Sanji's chin is digging uncomfortably into his shoulder rather than how his face is inches away.

Sanji doesn't seem to notice, his breath fanning along Zoro's cheek as he prattles on about brioche buns.

Zoro is trying very hard to stay still, internally processing the warmth of the cook's flushed face against his own and sending a silent prayer to whatever deity is out there this will be over soon. He also pointedly does not look at Nami and Usopp snickering over their wine glasses in the corner either.

He's snapped out of his impromptu staring contest with a stain on the wall when he feels Sanji slump almost completely off of the chair, and then suffers a mini heart attack when the blond kicks his legs up on the other side of the bench and straight up puts his head in Zoro's lap.

Zoro stares down at him in surprise and Sanji stares back, both eyes visible with his bangs swept out of his face. They're half-lidded and his face is tinted red from the liquor. Neither of them says anything, for a moment. Sanji's gaze sweeps across Zoro's face, looking for something. He pauses, and Zoro has to clamp his mouth shut because every time he sees Sanji like this he suddenly gains the inexplicable urge to say I've been in love with you for three years, please make out with me, which would be very bad.

The cook's eyebrows furrow, and he parts his pretty, pink lips before mumbling softly;

"...Did you get a haircut?"

Zoro throws his head back and groans. "That's it, we're going back to the ship."

He can hear Nami and Usopp's shrieking laughter clearly, even over Sanji's slurred protests as Zoro chugs the rest of his beer, hoists the fucking idiot up on his back, and marches out of the bar.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zoro did, in fact, get a haircut. Sanji should know b/c hes the one who did it lmao. Also, it takes Zoro an hour to walk the 15 minutes back to the ship, and Sanji talks about bread the entire time.

Am i making Zoro whipped for Sanji because i am whipped for Sanji? Interesting question, indeed. Will i ever stop? No.

Ty to my loyal 5 followers i gained yesterday!!! shoutout to yall.

Also i would REALLY appreciate comments about how i can improve my writing style so if you have any feedback please comment !!!!!

okay bye :p

[whyse7vn]

I’M SORRY -

[ ot7 x reader ]

JUNGKOOK -

jk: i’m sorry

jk: didn’t mean to make you upset :(

i hope i die

i should get jumped

barely survive

be on life support until i’m 50

and when i wake up die from the most painful heart attack recorded

i hope no one attends my funeral and i’m publicly and privately made fun of even after i’ve passed

hope my parents are ashamed and i hope that whenever the name jungkook is said people feel sick to their stomachs

i’m gonna throw up

gonna choke myself to death

i have the tightest grip on my throat rn

i’m going red

it’s fading to black

i’m sorry i wasn’t being a good boyfriend

tell bam that his dad was an asshole who didn’t deserve any rights

don’t even let him remember me as his father

i don’t deserve that title

i don’t deserve anything

not after what i did

burn all my clothes

delete all my pictures

tear my face off all posters

cross my name off all paperwork

i am not worthy of anything

y/n: shut up

jk: i’m sorry

y/n: i can tell

jk: i didn’t mean it

y/n: i forgive you

jk: really?

y/n: yeah

jk: do you really or are joking?

if ur joking it’s not a funny joke

y/n: you can come back home now

jk: really 🥺?

y/n: don’t ever use that emoji again

jk: sorry

i’m coming

omw

i love you

this is so great

y/n: you’re so dramatic

jk: i’m sorry

y/n: stop apologising

jk: sorry

i mean

ok

love u

y/n: hurry up

jk: 🏃‍♂️

SEOKJIN -

jin: can you talk to me now

hey

hey

hey

hey

hey

hey

hey

hey

i’m going to kms and it gonna be all your fault if you don’t reply to me

y/n: record it

jin: hey loml 😘😘❤️❤️❤️🤗🤗

WAIT WTF

THATS SO SICK?/?:£:££.&.&.&&.

y/n: what do you want?

jin: i love you ❤️💓🩷

y/n: bye

jin: WAITTTT :(((((((((((((((

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

pls

y/n: what

jin: i’m outside 🤭🤗❤️

y/n: stay outside

jin: am i a dog?????

DON’T ANSWER THAT

anyways

i’ve come to see you princess 😘❤️‍🔥

y/n: gross

go home

jin: i am home 🥺

y/n: ur at MY home

jin: tu casa es mi casa 😚

y/n: that is not how that phrase goes

jin: let me inside pookie it’s cold 😍

y/n: you should have a key if it’s ur house

jin: LET ME IN IM TRYING SOSOSOSO HARD

FUCK YOU

ITS COLD

MY HAIR IS WET

IM DISTRESSED

LET ME INNNNNNNN

y/n: it took you 3 minutes

to be an asshole again

jin: :((((

i really tried that time

i can’t help it

this is real this is me

i was born this way

you can’t change me

ur the asshole if we think about it why are you trying to change people?? let the world know you LOSER

y/n: fyi you can stay outside

jin: PLS NOOOO PLS PLS PLS PLS PLS PLS

y/n: “pls” doesn’t really sound like sorry to me…

jin: I SAID IM SORRY

I DIDN’T MEAN TO SHOUTT

IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRYYYYYYYYYYY

i love you

this is kinda sadistic if you think about it

didn’t know you was a freak like that bae

it’s okay i kinda like it

how about you let me in now

or do you want me to beg more???

pls oh plsssss let me in 🥺

i’ll never be mean again i promise 😇

pls 😚

hello??

babe??????

fr this isn’t funny

hello

HELLO

OPEN THE DOOR PLS

HELLLOOOO

OMH

HELLLLO

pls

i’m fr sorry

i mean it like genuinely

hello

…

okay let’s stop now

…………..

HELLLLO

fuck you

HOSEOK -

hobi: this fighting stuff kinda boring now

….

hello

i’m sorry

BOOOO

:(((

y/n: you can’t just walk out the house mid argument

hobi: in my defence u were being mean

y/n: so were you???

hobi: ??

y/n: be honest are you fr gonna just leave like that when things get hard?

hobi: i mean i might

y/n: …

hobi: things were pretty hard

y/n: AS MAN OF THE HOUSE YOU SHOULD OF GOT RID OF THE SPIDER

hobi: AS A FEMINIST I LEFT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF IT TO HELP YOU FEEL EMPOWERED

y/n: fuck you don’t come home

hobi: i would never lie to u bae 🙏🏼

and i would never suppress a moment for a woman to feel empowered

y/n: don’t actually fucking speak to me

hobi: ily

cheer up baby cheer up baby

y/n: picked the wrong member

jungkook would of helped me

hobi: omg????????

are you fr?

y/n: would never lie to you bae 🙏🏽

hobi: ….

JIMIN -

jimin:

y/n: ???

jimin: are you still mad at me?

y/n: yes jimin wtf

jimin: do you want to have sex?

y/n: yes jimin wtf

jimin: love you

y/n: whatever

jimin: say it back

y/n: i won’t

jimin: you will

y/n: definitely will not

jimin: i’ll sing for you

y/n: no thanks

jimin: no thanks?

y/n: no thanks.

jimin: you say that like i’m bad at singing

y/n: eh

jimin: eh?

y/n: eh.

jimin: i won’t have sex with you

y/n: aw man

jimin: don’t sound too sad

y/n: ok

jimin: you should be

y/n: i’m not

jimin: i go crazy in bed yk?

y/n: that is the ugliest thing you have ever said to me

jimin: if ur not in love with me just say that

y/n: i won’t

jimin: so ur IN love with me is what i’m hearing

y/n: ur not hearing anything cuz we are messaging rn

jimin: can you just tell me you love me like a normal person?

y/n: you don’t deserve it

jimin: okay maybe that’s true

but you should do it just once

pretty pls with a cherry on top 🥺

y/n: i’ll punch you

jimin: maybe i’ll enjoy it

y/n: nasty

jimin: kiss me

y/n: where are you?

jimin: ur really gonna kiss me?

y/n: ur talking long to tell me where you are so ig i’m not

jimin: joon’s studio

y/n: maybe i’m omw

jimin: ur so in love with me it’s kinda gross 🤭

YOONGI -

yoongi: :3

y/n: die tbh

yoongi: :3

y/n: your stupid faces mean nothing to me

yoongi: :3

y/n: …

yoongi: :33333

y/n: i hate you

yoongi: :Ɛ

y/n: ew wtf how did you do that

yoongi: Ɛ:

y/n: stop omg

yoongi: i’m sorry :3

y/n: cool

yoongi: i’m fr :3

y/n: idc :3

yoongi: you used the face :3

ur not mad :3

y/n: ur logic is wrong

yoongi: bring the face back :3

and it’s not logic it’s common sense :3

y/n: ur wrong

yoongi: never been wrong a day in my life :3

y/n: that’s crazy

so when you shouted at me for no reason you weren’t in the wrong?

good to know

yoongi: okay i never said that :3

y/n: but you did

yoongi: ur being annoying :3

y/n: fuck you

DID YOU JUST SEND ME 10K?????????

yoongi: did i? :3

y/n: you can’t just buy my forgiveness

yoongi: i can’t? :3

y/n: this is not how relationships work yoongi

yoongi: this is how our relationship works :3

y/n: no it’s not

STOP SENDING ME MONEY OMG?:£:£:’

yoongi: :3

y/n: you are still not forgiven leave me alone

yoongi: unforgiven i’m a villain :3

y/n: SEND ANOTHER 10k AND UR GETTING BLOCKED

yoongi: ur making me real upset rn :3

y/n: go back to work

yoongi: stop being mad at me :3

y/n: die

yoongi: don’t say that i’m about to get on a plane :3

y/n: now i feel bad

yoongi: say sorry :3

y/n: nvm

yoongi: :(

look you’ve made me change faces hope you feel bad :(

y/n: i don’t

yoongi: ur sick and twisted :(

y/n: cry about it

yoongi: really hope i survive this plane ride :(

y/n: i will not be guilt tripped by you

yoongi: you told me to die knowing i was getting on a plane :(

y/n: bye

yoongi: what if i had a deep deep fear of flying and u made that fear 10x worse rn :(

y/n: you don’t

yoongi: you don’t know a thing :(

y/n: fuck you

yoongi: do you really want ur last words to me be fuck you :(

y/n: fly safe

TAEHYUNG -

y/n: no

tae: hiiiiiiii

wtf how did you know

y/n: blocked

tae: NONONONONONO

y/n: you have one minute

go

tae: i am walking alone rn

y/n: ???

tae: on the street

y/n: ok?

tae: alone

y/n: you said that

tae: ALONE

ALL ALONE

y/n: right

tae: it’s not right actually

ITS VERY FAR FROM RIGHT

i’m ALONE

do you know what could happen to me rn?

i could literally be snatched up off the street by anyone

y/n: hopefully it’s a rehabilitation centre 🙏🏽

tae: WHAG IS UR PROBLEM

IM ALONE ALONE ALONE ALONE

ME

KIM TAEHYUNG ALONE ON THE STREET

WHAT ARE YOU NOT GETTING HERE?

y/n: ur one minute is up

tae: no it’s not

can you pls care for me rn i’m stressed out

y/n: it was pretty stressful when you stood me up yesterday

but i powered through 💪🏽

i’m sure you can do the same!!!

tae: that never happened

pls let’s pretend that never happened

i’m the perfect boyfriend i swear

y/n: get lost

like actually

never come back

tae: 😢

you don’t even mean that

y/n: are you sure?

tae: IM SORRY PLS PLSPLSSSSSS

forgive me

y/n: no

tae: you can have my card

y/n: don’t want it

tae: take my house

i’ll give you my keys rn

y/n: i have ur keys

tae: you do?

you thief omg

give them back

y/n: you left them here???

after YOU stormed out my house after you made ME upset

tae: oh yeah

i’m coming back now

y/n: asshole

tae: let’s put this behind us and move on

that’s a great idea i say

y/n: you are single

tae: don’t say that

y/n: said it

tae: we are actually engaged and expecting our 10th child

y/n: you are single

tae: top 10 singles

made a few of those in my time

LOL

i’m funny right

say i’m funny

y/n: it’s painful talking to you

tae: painfully in love with me are you?

y/n: it’s like i’m taking to a brick wall

you have like selective hearing

tae: what i’m hearing is you want to kiss me on the lips?

y/n: call an ambulance

tae: feeling so much love for me ur throwing up?

???

hello

oh

ok

maybe i do deserve this

NAMJOON -

y/n: would you now like to explain why the hell you sent halsey flowers on MY birthday??

namjoon: it wasn’t just on ur birthday i’ve been sending them all week for like a month now

y/n: namjoon what the fuck??

namjoon: i’m confused

y/n: UR confused????

do you like her or something?

namjoon: ofc i like her!

y/n: so ur cheating?

namjoon: what

y/n: ur cheating on me and you have no shame???

what the actual fuck is wrong with you??

namjoon: i’m not cheating?

y/n: for a month now you’ve been sending another girl that you like flowers

EVERY WEEK???

namjoon: every friday

y/n: fuck you

namjoon: i’m confused how that’s cheating when you told me to do that?

y/n: WHEN HAVE I EVER SAID “OH NAMJOON SEND OTHER BITCHES FLOWERS”

namjoon: you literally said you loved how halsey’s bf gave her flowers every week and that you wished i did that?

y/n: ….

there is no way

….

namjoon

oh my god

kim fucking namjoon

LMAOOSO ARE YOU FR?

namjoon: what??? i’m so confused pls tell me what i did wrong

i would never cheat on you

ur freaking me out

y/n: think about it

why would i wish you sent halsey flowers?

think

like really think

namjoon: IDK i was confused as hell but you seemed like you really wanted me to

so i did

y/n: i meant i wanted you to buy ME flowers you idiot omg

namjoon: oh

that makes a lot more sense

y/n: yeah

you are the dumbest smart man i’ve ever met

namjoon: my fault

i get confused sometimes 😞

y/n: i love you

namjoon: i love you too

ur not mad anymore?

y/n: could never be mad at you silly

[stellaistryingtowrite]

working late

Friday overtime has burnt out all your strength and energy. How could Akai possibly light it up?

shuichi akai x reader

cw: no cw, reader's is referred as a Miss, no physical description but reader is a FULL-GROWN WOMAN with a FULL TIME JOB. no angst, yes comfort. lots of kisses.

authors note: as much as i hate to admit it, likes and reblogs DO matter. i didn't expect my boyfriend!akai headcanons to receive 26 likes, i thought i'd get 3—maybe 6 at most. no hard feelings, detco isn't very popular. but i got 26 likes and i thought "wow there are other people who are starving for this content just as much as i do" so i decided to quickly write another one as a thanks. i hope you enjoyed this!

You tilted your head to your left and right—hearing a loud crack with each turns. Releasing a heavy sigh, you leaned back against your chair and blearily stared at the bright screen of your computer.

Working as a tech support wasn’t easy. It paid slightly higher than the average wage, but it left you with no work-life balance.

The client you were assigned to were having a major issue with the system and had to be solved immediately, leaving you at work until way past your work hour.

Your eyes darted towards the corner of your laptop screen.

20.26.

Unconsciously, you took another deep sigh and rubbed your eyes hard. Not wanting to irritate your eyes any further, your hands raised up high towards the ceiling as your arched your back and stretched your body with a loud groan.

Once you were satisfied, you threw your body back against the chair.

Fuck, you cursed inwardly. I need a fucking break.

A beat passed as you sat there in the room, alone in the darkness and trying to collect some strength to pack up and went home.

Massage would be nice, you hummed to yourself. And a long nap. Ten hours of sleep, at least.

A loud grumble of your stomach interrupted your train of thoughts. Reminded of your initial plan, you rubbed your face and groaned in annoyance.

Every Friday, after work, Akai and you would go out for dinner. He would pick you up and the two of you would have dinner in a nice restaurant. You were worried your boyfriend would mind the traffic jam and tire himself out, but he assured you with a quick peck of your head.

“You know I’d never mind spending my time in my car with you,” he assured as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders.

His words and action softened your heart, and it quickly became a tradition with the two of you.

Earlier, you had texted him and apologizing profusely that you’d be staying much longer than you had intended to, before telling him to eat his dinner and don’t wait up for you.

With the issue at hand, you didn’t have a lot of chance to read his text, but you remembered how your screen had lit up earlier with a notification from him.

[akai ❤️ — 17.14]

Don’t worry about me. 👍🏼

You shot up and smacked the laptop shut, not even bothering to put it on Sleep mode or even shut it down like you’d usually do on Friday. After quickly shoving your things inside your bag, you grabbed your phone and left your desk.

While walking towards the elevator, you did a quick scroll of your phone’s notification.

[akai ❤️ — 17.14]

Don’t worry about me. 👍🏼

Just let me know when you’re done.

[akai ❤️ — 19.43]

Are you finished? It’s getting late, I’m worried about your gastritis.

[akai ❤️ — 20.05]

Remember about your health.

Your heart ached at his sweetness, but a frown began to form in your expression.

Did he eat? Had he arrived before you got to cancel your plans with him? What did he eat?

Questions ran through your head as you press the elevator button and wait for it to arrive.

You were about to type in your reply when your phone rang.

His name with a red heart emoji next to it (you thought it’d be funny. Red. Akai. Your boyfriend didn’t laugh, but you could’ve sworn you saw a quirk of his lips.) flashed on your screen. Without hesitating, you quickly press the green button.

“Hey,” you greeted him softly.

“Hi baby,” he returned. You leaned on the wall by the elevator door in pretense of exhaustion, but it was his nickname for you that made you weak at the knees. “Are you still working?”

“No,” you hummed as you stared at the sign above the elevator door. 5 more floors. “I’m waiting for the elevator now.”

From the phone, you heard some shuffling noises. “That’s good,” he answered. “I’ll pick you up.”

2 more floors. You frowned. “Akai, it’s alright. You don’t have to pick me up,” you assured. “I’ll eat something before I get home, so don’t worry about me and make sure to eat your dinner.”

“I’m at the parking lot.”

The doors of the elevator opened right as he uttered those words.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you walked into the elevator. Two other people were inside, but you and them couldn’t care less of each other. None of them had stared at your shocked expression—their blank eyes stared into the distance as they wait to arrive at the ground floor.

You’d be like that too, if it weren’t for your boyfriend’s statement.

“What parking lot?” you interrogated him as the elevator began its descent. “Like, our building parking lot? What were you doing there? Did you even have dinner?”

He didn’t answer and your frown grew even deeper. You put your phone away from your ear to see why he wasn’t answering.

The upper right corner of your phone answered your answer.

No signal.

You sighed resignedly and waited for the elevator to arrive at the ground floor—not even bothering to pocket your phone.

A few seconds later, the elevator stopped its descent and the door parted open.

Brushing past the two strangers, you rushed out and quickly phoned him again.

The phone rang while you tapped your card on the automatic access gate.

It rang again as you walked out towards the open-space lobby, surrounded by glass as walls.

It rang once again when you froze at the sight in front of you.

Shuichi Akai, leaning against his car in front of the lobby.

His gaze was trained on you as he smiled and waved as soon as you spotted him. One hand held the phone against his ear.

Dumfoundedly, you raised your phone to your ear.

Across the glass, he mouthed the words.

“Wanna have dinner?”

But you heard his voice through your phone.

Realization fell upon you that he was there, he was really there. Waiting in front of you on the lobby.

Without waiting any further, you ran outside. The cold evening air greeted you, but it was quickly replaced with his warmth as you crashed yourself towards him and wrapped your arms around his waist.

The warmth spread across your body as he embraced you in return, one arm across your shoulder and the other gently caressing your hair.

“Long day?” he teasingly asked with a short kiss to the crown of your head. Warmth spread across your cheeks. You didn’t even realize you had leaned on him and slagged your body—his arm was the only thing keeping you standing.

“Long week,” you whined against his chest.

He rubbed his hand on your upper shoulder in an attempt to lift up your spirits. “Come on, you must be hungry.”

His invitation reminded you of your initial worry. Your head shot up from his chest, but you kept your chin tucked against it—not wanting to be away from him for long.

“Did you remember to have dinner?” You gasped.

Akai hummed as he nodded his head.

“How long were you waiting for me?”

You finally leaned back so you could properly interrogate the man in front of you. Instantly, the cold air wrapped itself around your body and you found yourself missing his warmth.

“Not for long,” he assured.

Your eyebrows furrowed as you stared at him in suspicion.

“Were you waiting for me?” you pouted.

Akai didn’t reply—for he knew that you’d be upset with his answer. His lips quirked up to an all-knowing smile in respond.

It was adorable and infuriating how you insisted for him to eat his dinner on time yet abandoning your own meal. Akai knew that you wouldn’t have anything to eat in your office, unlike him that had a pork bun and grilled chicken thigh in nearby FamiMa.

Your frown grew even deeper and Akai held himself back from chuckling and your pouting lips.

He took one step forward from leaning against his car and closed the distance between the two of you. Wrapping his arm around your shoulder, he kissed your forehead—but unlike the quick peck earlier, he let it rest as he tried to remove your backpack on your shoulder. He remembered your work laptop and how it weighed down on your shoulders and how you’d tilt your head from the left to the right in an attempt to ease the ache.

Once he has your backpack slung across his shoulder, he lifted his lips from your head to answer your question.

Akai kept his arm wrapped towards your shoulder—mindful that he didn’t rest it there, knowing your shoulder pains—as he gently led you around his car, towards the passenger seat.

“When you texted me,” he began. “I was waiting for you in the lobby. I thought it’d be a waste to go back and come pick you up again. So I parked my car outside and had a quick snack at the Family Mart.”

He pinched your chin in adoration. “And I think Little Miss ‘Skipping-dinner-for-work’ shouldn’t nag me too much about eating my dinner late.”

Akai tapped your nose gently after scolding you.

You pouted and relented because you knew he was right.

The gentleman he was, Shuichi Akai opened the door to his passenger seat and waited for you to sit down. Once he knew you were comfortable, he grabbed your seat belt and leaned across your body to put it on.

You couldn’t resist the small space and quickly kissed his cheek.

“Thank you for waiting for me,” you softly mumbled. It had been a long week and you knew you were ready to drop dead as soon as you got home, but Akai picking you up and waiting for you for more than two hours gave you the comfort you needed.

As soon as you heard the seat belt clicked, Akai grabbed your chin and kissed you on your lips.

You held his face with both of your arms as you returned it—just as passionately, if not more.

It was short-lasting. He quickly pulled away and kissed the tip of your nose—but he couldn’t resist himself to pinch your chin once more before closing the door.

You giggled at his affection. It was nice to know that you were loved, even when you were tired down to your bones.

The door behind you opened and quickly shut—a sign that he was putting your backpack behind you. Your head turned to watch your man (my Akai. mine mine mine.) through the window as he walked around his car and eventually open the driver seat.

Your gaze never moved from him as he sat on his seat and started the car. As soon as the engine rumbled, he straightened up and shifted the gear.

Your smile only grew when he turned his head towards yours with his ghost smile that you liked so much.

It was thin across his lips, and the corner of his eyes barely crinkled. But his gaze were warm and kind and it fills your with all sorts of love that you never realized you could experience from a simple action of picking you up from work.

“Ready to leave?”

-END-

Dictionary FamiMa → Family Mart. Minimarket chain that’s very popular in Japan, very similar to Seven-Eleven. You can buy food and ask for them to be warmed up and they have small sitting areas for you to have your snacks.

[sems-diarie]

*SNIVELING*

oki, ‘m new here, but I thought u would like to hear ‘bout this situation that occurred while I was writing with a katsuki bot I made, ITS SO SIMPLE BUT I— live laugh katsuki 🥺

When her nails are finally done, he comes over to inspect them, giving an approving nod. "Cute," he says gruffly, taking her newly manicured hand in his larger one and running his thumb over the back of it gently.

"This what you wanted?" He asks, glancing over at her face. His tone is casual but his eyes are intent, wanting to be sure she's happy with how they turned out. Her satisfaction means more to him than anything.

He helps her up out of the chair, careful not to mess up her fresh nails. As they walk out of the salon hand in hand, he can't resist teasing her a little. "Don't know how you walk in those damn things," he says, nodding at her wedges. "Might have to carry you if you can't keep up, dumbass."

— 🧁anon

oh that last one is so so so so <3333 i just bought some wedges and they tear my feet apart. sweeps you up without so much as a second thought, one hand tucked under your knees and the other at your back. you feel weightless first, then breathless—

“so funny, mister hero.” you nearly gasp it with the way he just made all the breath in you vanquish. like nothing, you realize. katsuki doesn’t even so much as blink an eye, instead nudging his shoulder to push a door in. “use your hands, next time.”

“important cargo here, sweets,” he wastes no time in snapping back. “i’d say wear better shoes but—,”

“—because,” you’re quick to cut in, “you hate when i have fun?”

“bu-hht.” katsuki jostles you in his arms, not unkindly but none too lightly at all. “we need to be on time for dinner or my mom will wring my neck.”

ruby eyes catch a look at your shoes. they clatter against your skin every now and again as he hustles you toward the car. they hug your feet so nicely; the sweet make of them adds something glorious to your flair.

“what’s wrong?” you tug gently at the buttoned sleeve of his dress shirt. “you don’t like them?”

he sets you down to click open the passenger door.

the last you hear of katsuki is as he ushers you down into the seat. he sounds troubled, forlorn almost. then the coward hobbles on around to stick his keys into his ignition and glide off.

“remind me to fuck you in those shoes later tonight.”

“oh no way,” you gaze on him sharpens. “these wouldn’t withstand it. it’s barefoot or nothing with you now.”

“what’s that shit you love to say when you’re bein’ dramatic?” you hum, tapping at your phone to let mitsuri know the two of you are on your way. katsuki’s quick to follow up.

“i remember: you hate my happiness.”

“no!” you retaliate, only after a few beats. your phone zings! Take your time, your mother in law shoots a text back, followed by a few blue heart emojis.

your snap your neck to eye your husband down, “i think it’s important to remember how your splooge ruined my red bottoms the last time i let you raw me in heels.

which was yesterday, by the way.”

“so, what?”

“sooo, what!” katsuki’s nearly impressed when your voice pitches three octaves. oh, he’s pissed you off. bad. well, it can’t be too bad, he reasons with himself.

the bastard doesn’t even fight the smirk that curls in his lips, spliced at the corner with a real nasty scar.

“so, what?” katsuki mutters. “the new pair were ordered an hour later.”

you sputter. “is that my point, dickhead? i’ll answer for you: no!”

[adh-james-version]

Introducing Me/My Blog‼️🔆🩷

Name: Aubrey‼️

Me in emojis: 😛🤘🏾😒👑🏳️‍🌈🇺🇸🤷🏾‍♀️

My fave emojis: 😛‼️😭😒🫶🏾🖕🏾😂

Sport: 🏀

Height: 6’2 (no I’m not joking😒)

Pronouns: cis girl - she/her💕

Favorite colors: 💜🩷🩵

Sexuality: pansexual🩷💛💙

Main Fandom: Marauders (Harry Potter)🌙🐀🐾🦌💫🥀🗡️

Kin: James at heart🔅

Favorite Characters: Regulus🙌🏾, Evan💋, Remus🫶🏾, Dorcas👑

Fave Ships: JEGULUS, Rosekiller, Dorlene, Jartylus, Pandalily

Other Fandoms: Lightning Era (Harry Potter)⚡️,Simon Snow (getting back into it)🪄🐉, Hamilton (sorta)📜✒️, RED QUEEN👑🩸(is there a fandom for this!?! I can’t find it)

Favorite quote: "There will be times in life where you crank that soujia boy, and there be times when that soujia boy cranks you, respond accordingly"‼️🔥

Random Fun Facts: i LOVE emojis‼️, I can do the splits🤸🏾‍♀️💪🏾, and I squat 215🏋🏾‍♀️🔥

Inbox: always open‼️ talk about ANYTHING‼️

Messages: I’ll answer EVERYONE😇 I LOVE to talk😋

Tip for viewing my posts/reblogs: more typos = more funny/fun😛✍🏾. Less typos = more “serious” (kinda)😭

My little introduction: Heyyy y’all, I’m Aubrey! 🙋🏾‍♀️I play basketball and I love to read and write! I write oneshots on Wattpad in my free time cause I got nun better to do😭😛.I don’t really give a fuck about anyone’s opinions, ima do and say what I want. I swear im not mean, im actually nice js don’t piss me off for no reason‼️🗣️ Arguing about a ship or something? Sure. Being rude for no god damn reason? No.😒 I’m prolly a tad 🤏🏾narcissistic but i don’t do allat self diagnosing shit🙅🏾‍♀️❌. I love talking, like I talk so damn much that it’s annoying👄🗣️. I love looking at my own story after I get all cute💋. 90% of my camera roll is pictures of me‼️👑

Picture(s) of me:

[denim-devil]

BITES YOU BITES YOU BITES YOU BITES YOU (I'm funny plz laugh)

✊🙈🛁🍪💌 headcanons for Frank Castle please and thank you :3

NSFW Headcannons | F.C

Nsfw/Smut Emoji Prompt

──────. • ☆:*.☽ .* :☆ﾟ• . ──────

✊ Masturbation -

Settling into the couch, Frank flicks through the channels, his fingers gliding over the remotes buttons to distract him from the growing ache between his thighs.

He had no place to be, flicking over the red button, the TV switching off immediately. Frank shuffled, sinking back into the couch.

He huffed, eyes lingering down his front until they settled on the soft mound growing underneath his denim jeans. Just a simple glance at the picture frames dotted around your shared apartment draw Frank in further, his thoughts turning soon lust-filled.

His hands search across his thighs before his fingers scramble quickly to make use of his zip, pulling the metal latch down until he found access to the thin material of his boxers, grazing past the now fully formed bulge.

Frank hums, his cold finger tips running along the underside of his thick, warm cock. He shivered at the touch, it was slightly exhilarating, his heart-beat skipping a beat once he managed to fish out his member, allowing it to rest against his cotton-clad stomach.

It weeped, the head glistening underneath the desk side lamp. He twitched at the contact of his palm which managed to wrap around the thick base, already he shuddered, he always forgets just how good it feels.

He slowly rises his enclosed fist watching his foreskin roll loosely over his sensitive flushed tip. A breathy “fuck” escaped his open mouth, his brows furrowing as soon as he set a rhythm, one that left him eager for more.

The quickened pace let for a build up, a coil, one which grew bigger, like a knot in his stomach. With each jerk, his pace almost faltered, his thighs shook with need, with every stroke his eyes glossed over the same pictures, the two of you, focusing on your face, his rhythm grew strong, his tugs were forceful which left him a mess.

He chased after the bliss he so desired, the room filling with soft grunts and relaxed huffs, Frank craved this, he wanted more.

🙈 something they’re shy about asking for -

• Frank sighed, he settled into the soft mattress below him, his wrapped around your back, holding you close. Today was stressful, he could see it written all over your face which is why he decided to take your mind off of things.

• “you okay?” He muttered softly, his eyes trailing down to meet your gaze. You nod with a gentle smile before shuffling until your sat with your legs folded on either side of his thighs.

• “yeah…Just happy to be in your arms” you mumble, wiggling your hips innocently which inevitably draws out a long, huffy moan.

• “oh?” You question, maintaining your eye contact. The closeness alone had Frank’s thoughts jumbled but full with anything but innocent notions.

• Frank gently rolled his hips up into your jean-clad ass, his hands focusing on the soft muscles underneath. He began to squeeze which brought your focus onto his growing smirk. Slowly but surely you quickly grabbed onto his shoulder which maintained your balance in his lap.

• Your finger tips grazed at his neck which had Frank lose all sense of normality. He groaned, sinking into the touch, his hands clenching onto the handful of muscle he held, his hazel eyes clenching shut.

• You still, watching the older male. His body regains control, opening up his eyes in efforts to brush off what just happened, this was about you right?

• His cheeks flushed but not completely. His hands let go, moving upwards until they settled on your back. You could feel him, his warmth, the barrier of his jeans wearing thin at the growing bulge.

• “Frank, are you okay?” It takes a few seconds for him to respond, he does so with a simple nod but it left you feeling confused, if anything, he had completely changed in the last few seconds.

• Your fingers skimmed past his neck, judging by the way he flinched you could tell it was sensitive, that he couldn’t handle himself, he fucking loved it.

• “Does it hurt?” You question once again before allowing the span of your hand to gently feel the area, prodding at the tough muscles underneath. He fidgeted in place, he looked down, his focus elsewhere.

• “Frank, look at me- I wanna know why you-“

• He cut you off, one of his hands moving your hand higher until it was wrapped around his throat softly. He looked up, his once hazel brown orbs clouded with a thick darkness, lust.

• You squeeze unintentionally which leads Frank to roll his hips once more, his head falling back against the headboard with a low groan. You whimper watching him crumble underneath your touch, he was truly beautiful with your hand wrapped around his neck.

• “couldn’t tell you darlin’…embarrassing” he ushers out before you tighten your grip, shutting him up.

🛁 shower/bath sex

The Bath water was hot, almost scolding, your back rested against Frank’s toned chest, his arms easily wrapping around your waist, keeping you on his cock.

The rhythm was slow, romantic. Each shallow roll of your hips had several groans escaping from his open mouth. Frank helped you with his hands, bouncing you on his cock.

“Sweetheart, I know you can do better”

His words were the encouragement you needed to pick up the pace, your thrust turning from shallow and gentle to loud, rough. The water cascaded over the sides of the tub, covering the tiled floor, but Frank kept going, practically using your body.

“That’s it, Atta boy“

Frank watched you work for it all the while revelling in the pleasure coursing through his veins, the water slowed his hips but fuck, it added a whole new sensation…

🍪 an after sex snack

• Frank likes to enjoy something quick and easy after sex, something fresh and flavourful like fruit. He usually grabs it from the fridge before coming back to bed, sitting beside you whilst you revel in his previous work.

• More then often, he picks an orange. Easily he can tear it in half, sharing it with you, although he does end up with sticky fingers but that’s not an issue, most of the time you end up latching lips onto the tips, sucking the slightly dried juices from his thick digits.

• The snacks always help you both indulge on a “round 2”.

💌 sending/receiving nudes

Frank isn’t new to this, definitely not. It filled him with denial, whilst he understood you worked he couldn’t help himself, how could he, it was risky.

By clicking onto his contacts, your number pops up first. Immediately his heart skips a beat before he began typing, although once he did, he focused on the letters.

“You alone? x”

The buzz travels down your thigh. You forget about the box in your hands, placing the package down before reaching into your pocket, fishing out your phone.

The screen is bright underneath the dim warehouse strip lights, your eyes settling on the message. It was Frank. Your eyebrows furrow before you click onto the notification, typing away at your passcode.

You re-read over the text before you start typing.

“Yeah, what’s up? x”

Frank almost immediately began typing back, the ache running along his slowly growing cock encouraging his needs. You watched the three dots appear, making you break out in a smile.

They stopped. Your smile faded slightly before a blurred picture pops up. The bright olive-tan complexion flooded your eyes. Frank licked at his lips before awaiting an answer, still flicking over the previous texts.

Stilling, your heart-beat thumps away in your ears, loud enough to distract you. Clicking on the picture, it becomes refined, cleaner, revealing the Frank’s cock.

His heart warmed watching the three dots pop up. He revelled in the thought of you losing your mind at work, it brought him a sense of power, which he took with a grain of salt.

“Frank…it’s so…big x”

His stomach filled with butterflies knowing full well you were somewhat a mess, aching in those tracks you borrowed from him.

You ached, wincing at the picture, eyes glued to the thick vein that ran along the ridged side, how he slightly curved to left, eyes travelling down to the thick base, you could feel your mouth water as you clenched around nothing but air.

Typing back, he decided to press send.

“It’s all here and ready for you…x”

With that he switches of his phone before flipping it into the spare space next to him, smirking as he tucked himself away, saving it for when you finished work…

You were a mess, all from one damn photo.

[its-time-to-write]

ch. 6 - hustling for the good life

table of contents

I’m not projecting I’m not projecting I’m not projecting

forever is the sweetest con

Natalie’s waiting by the door when you come home.

“How was it?” she asks before you can even take your coat off.

“It was fucking amazing,” you sigh. “Gonna suck when we have to break up.”

Natalie gives you a look, that strange one that she sometimes has when she thinks you’re acting like a robot.

“You know that it doesn’t have to end like that, right?” she asks. “You know you deserve happiness and real love no matter what it looks like, right?”

“Yeah,” you say, refusing to look her in the eye. “Obviously.”

Natalies grabs your face with one hand and forces eye contact. “Say it with me: ‘I deserve love.’”

“I deserve love,” you mumble, looking at Nat’s hairline. 

“Nuh uh.” She wiggles your face with her hand. “Louder and with feeling this time. ‘I deserve love.’”

You say, “I deserve love,” a little louder and Natalie isn’t quite satisfied, but she lets you go.

“You don’t have to turn your life into art,” she says as you head to your room. “Sometimes you can just enjoy it all by yourself.”

—

Jamie on the other hand, is over the fucking moon. They’ve only got a couple more games until the season’s over, then he’s a free man and he can go wherever you are, following you around like a trophy boyfriend and he’s fucking great with that.

Yes, it’s only been one date, but he’s properly in love. 

went great keels he texts late after your date. gonna ask her out again.

Keeley responds with several thumbs up and pink heart emojis. And a black heart. That’s from Roy, she says.

Jamie’s pretty sure it isn’t from Roy, but he’ll accept it all the same.

—

Sam, Colin, and Isaac had accompanied him to the coffee concert, and they had been thoroughly briefed on Jamie’s mission to get you on a date. And properly threatened about keeping it to themselves.

“How’d it go mate?” Colin whispers at training the morning after the date. “What’s she like?”

“Fucking amazing,” Jamie says, taking extra care to stretch his hamstrings.

“What did you talk about?” Isaac asks. “Because she might throw all your deepest secrets in her next album. Got to be careful, bruv.”

Jamie shakes his head. “Nah, she ain’t like that. She’s pretty quiet, actually. Said she hates crowds. I think it gives her anxiety, like.”

“That has to be difficult to deal with in her career,” Sam adds, worried. “I wonder how she will do on her tour?”

Jamie shrugs. “Dunno, mate. Didn’t talk about it. But she’s proper fucking funny. Made me laugh so hard I snorted water out me nose.”

“And she’s still texting you?” Colin asks in mock disbelief. “That’s enough to give me the ick any day.”

They laugh and finish stretching before Roy can yell at them for gabbing like a bunch of schoolgirls.

—

Natalie’s words echo in your head for the entirety of the week. 

You can enjoy it all by yourself.

You make it your lock screen so you remember every time you check your phone to see if Jamie’s texted. 

You don’t have to turn your life into art. Sometimes you can just enjoy it all by yourself.

So you do. 

You attend Richmond’s remaining games, sometimes in the box with Rebecca and Keeley, sometimes in the stands with just enough red and blue face paint to be unrecognizable. 

You do end up in the papers, but not for anything major. Just a who’s who of sorts at the games, and you’re never once recognized by anyone when you’re in the stands. 

You always wait for Jamie in Rebecca’s office, where he swoops in and plants a kiss before traipsing to his car, where you’ll celebrate with the lads or commiserate over dinner. 

Apparently karaoke is somewhat of an AFC Richmond tradition and Sam convinces you to sing at least one song. 

“You don’t even have to try,” he says. “And you can make Jamie sing with you. He’s surprisingly good.”

“Fine,” you agree. “One song. And not one of mine.”

“Done!” Sam shakes your hand with a grin. You can’t help but grin back. 

You go to find Jamie, who’s perusing the song list with Isaac. He looks up with a smile when he sees you. 

“Babe, Isaac’s gonna do Adele,” he says. 

“It’s my speciality,” Isaac says. 

You laugh and say, “Sounds great, babe.”

You open your mouth to ask if Jamie wants to sing a song with you, but the words get stuck in your throat. What if people think you’re just trying to show off? All you want to do is jump around like an idiot with the rest of the team and their partners. 

Jamie, unnervingly, senses something’s up. He gently grabs your arm and steers you to a quieter corner. 

“You alright, love?” he asks softly. “We can leave if you need.”

“No,” you say tentatively, “No, I just- I was kind of wondering- do you want to sing a song together? I was thinking it would be kind of fun, but we don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

Jamie’s face splits into a grin. “Oh I totally fucking want to. D’you like ABBA?” 

You scoff. “‘Do I like ABBA,’ what kind of question is that? Of course I fucking like ABBA. You got a song you want to do?”

Jamie shrugs. “Dunno. You?”

You pause for a moment, thinking. Then-

“Oh my gosh I have the perfect one!”

Ten minutes later, you’re both on the stage with microphones as the music starts. 

As you begin singing the first lines of Super Trouper, Jamie begins harmonizing and it catches you so off guard that it startled out a laugh. 

He’s just being so silly with it, dancing and swinging you around, singing directly in Roy’s face and shimmying with Beard. You can’t help but smile along with him as he attempts to twirl you while still singing. The rest of the room is clapping and singing along, and you can’t remember the last time you had this much fun.

The song ends and Jamie helps you hop down from the stage, laughing and sweaty. 

“Well that was just a treat,” says Ted, but you only have eyes for Jamie.

“I didn’t know you could sing like that!” you exclaim. “I should take you on tour with me.”

“Had to sing, growing up with me mum,” Jamie says. “Tina Turner, Stevie Nicks, fuckin’… ABBA. All the classics. Didn’t really have a choice but to join her, did I?”

A shadow crosses your face.

“You alright?” Jamie asks for the second time that night. 

You’re just staring at him, trying to take slow, deep breaths as opposed to the shallow ones you currently have.

“Is it the people?” he asks as he pulls you out the door. “Ted? The song?”

You shake your head. “Tour,” you manage. “Oh fuck.”

Just saying it out loud causes your heart to speed up even faster.

You flex your fingers in Jamie’s hands, trying to ground yourself. 

This is the first time you’ve ever panicked in front of him, not counting the night you met. And god, it’s so embarrassing. 

Breathe, you idiot, you remind yourself. It’s not that hard.

“Did you know Isaac’s mum has two left hands?” Jamie asks conversationally, as if you’re not cutting off the circulation in his hand.

You pause. “…What?”

“Isaac’s mum has two left hands,” Jamie says again. “Weird, innit? How the fuck does that even happen? Does that mean her palm’s facing the wrong way?”

“I don’t know,” you reply slowly. “Never- never met anyone with two of the same hand.”

“I could ask Isaac for a picture,” Jamie continues, same strangely normal tone. “Wonder if anyone else in his family’s like that. Maybe Isaac’s got two left feet,” he says worriedly. “Come to think of it, never actually seen him without socks.”

That makes you laugh.

You take a deep breath and say, “Thanks. I um, I hate panicking in front of people. It’s kind of shit. Natalie’s usually good at covering for me in public. Same with my exes.”

Jamie nods. “Gaffer said you can shock people out of ‘em. Say something weird, like. He said it’s like scaring someone with hiccups.”

“That doesn’t actually work,” you say.

Jamie gives you a mischievous look. “We’ll find out next time you have them,” he says.

You’re quiet, and he takes the opportunity to gather you in his arms, resting his head on top of yours.

He asks, “Wanna talk about it?” to which you shake your head.

“Actually…” you hesitate. “I do. I keep thinking about my tour. I’m going to be gone for a bit and you have like, practice still even in the off season. Like, you have stuff to do. And this is my first tour and I don’t even know when I’m going to see you even when I’m in London, so that means that we’re probably going to break up and that freaks me out.”

Jamie nods, chin brushing across your hair. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. If we get to it.”

He says it so matter-of-factly that you almost believe him.

—

You don’t think about it. You won’t. You’re flying home soon and Richmond just finished their season, Dani scoring and equalizer that meant Richmond is going back up to the Premier League. It was fucking… amazing. You’ve gone from barely knowing the mechanics of football to sitting on the very edge of your seat while Jamie hands the ball off to a teammate instead of taking matters into his own hands.

You’re in the stands, practically on the sidelines, and you can see him mouth the words, “You got this, muchacho. It’ll be fun.”

Post-match, you sneak into the dressing room to jump into his arms.

And if there’s a picture in the papers the next of you out celebrating with the team that night, you couldn’t care less. You’d rather stay in bed with Jamie’s strong arms around your middle, whispering promises he doesn’t have a chance in hell to keep.

—

He drives you and Natalie to the airport to catch your redeye back to America.

“Oi,” he says as he pulls your luggage out of the boot, “text me when you land.”

Natalie politely looks away and makes a retching sound as you pull his head down for a kiss.

“I’ll see you soon,” you reply. “I… I mean, I-”

“I love you too,” Jamie says.

table of contents

[shallowseeker]

The demon has the proverbial cat-that-ate-the-canary expression, a Joker-esque grin stretching across his face as he clicks the safety off the secondhand pistol.

"Wow, I expected better of the infamous Dean Winchester."

"Bite me."

"You walked right into that snare, buddy-boy. You ain't goin' nowhere now, not with your angel pal neutered."

The ring of holy fire is smokier than the usual, flaming up hot and wet, stinging Dean's eyes as the particles from the floor leech and leap into the air.

They'd been lured into the warehouse by, of all things, the sound of a crying child. Classic urban legend of a mistake. Embarrassing, really.

Cas is restless at Dean's back, probably two seconds from doing something stupid, like blanketing himself in front of Dean like an angel-bullet-shield.

"Hey!" the demon barks, his gun-hand shaking. (Nervous amateur. Probably a low-class demon.) "I said no sudden moves. I've got me some angel-killing bullets in my chamber here."

He could be bluffing, but god-damn if Dean's stomach doesn't drop to his toes.

"And I know what you hunters must be thinking. 'Why no sulfur at the crime scene?' or maybe even, 'Wow, that's the freshest-smelling demon I've ever met.'"

"Oh, trust me, Bel-air, we weren't thinkin' that."

Cas crowds in closer behind him, and Dean doubles down on getting the demon ruffled.

"Just so you know, wise-guy, even without your sulfur trail, your BO was enough to make me gag. But I just thought you were the typical low-life basement dweller, still suckin' on Mama's teat."

"Funny. The way I hear it, you're the one crying to Mama Winchester from the safety of your shitty Hobbit hole."

Dean shrugs. "There might be an occasional tear. What can I say? I'm tender-hearted."

Cas has slipped one arm from his coat sleeve. Dean does an exaggerated shrug on the opposite side, adding a little leg shimmy to draw the demon's attention. (David Copperfield, eat your heart out.)

"I wonder. Tender-hearted enough to save your angel pal? Tell me where Rowena MacLeod is and I'll consider letting you both walk."

"Rowena? What the Hell makes you think we're on speaking terms with her?"

The demon holds up a phone. Jack's lost phone. Rats.

"Your boy JACK plays Scrabble online with a Row-M.C.-heart-emoji, complete with her detailed, red-headed profile image. You hunters really are dumb as rocks."

Oh, for fuck's sake. Dean's gonna have to stage an online privacy intervention with everyone after this.

"You got us. We're one big happy mafia hunter fam. What's it to you?"

Cas's free hand snags on his waist, feeling for his gun holster, and Dean is seized by a fit of trepidation.

Can an angel shoot a gun from angel trap, or would it ricochet back somehow, fouled up by an invisible forcefield? There's a good chance it ricochets back, right? Otherwise, angels'd just throw their blades past the fire ring.

Might be worth the risk, though. From the looks of things, two bangs and they're both toast. Cas squeezes his waist, silently asking permission. Dean nudges back.

The gun goes off before Dean can even worry about the blowback, and the demon goes does like a sack of meat.

Dean rushes to scuff his foot over the line and whips off his jacket to further break the ring. Cas, still holding the smoking gun, rushes forward and hits the demon point-blank.

Adrenaline surging, Dean stumbles over to join him.

"Holy shit."

"I can't throw my blade because it's a part of me, but your gun penetrated the trap, no problem."

"Yeah... Dude. After this, we're arming you the Hell up with extra normal weapons. I don't care if you don't like carrying 'em. Could save your life in a bind like this."

Cas grunts, then scowls down at the mess they've left of the demon. He sweeps a hands over the gun, pensive.

"Whatsa matter? Feelin' dumb that we only just worked that out?"

"Marginally."

Dean snickers.

Cas shifts his arm back into his coat sleeve before crouching down to rummage through the demon's pockets.

"That was a nice move, slipping your coat arm like that. Your leftover sleeve looked just enough like a real arm not to tip him off."

"Thank you, Dean. Your verbal assault and distracting movements were also critical to victory."

Something about the way he says 'distracting movements' has Dean heating up on high alert. He clears his throat. "How the Hell did he evade us anyway?"

Cas rummages around some more before procuring a fancy bottle of cologne.

Dean resists the urge to depress the spray end. "Huh."

"I think we've finally figured out how the boutique perfume line fits into this case. The witch must be selling it to demons as a sort of neutralizing cloak."

"So this whole thing boils down to demonic deodorant?"

Cas nods, pulling out his cell phone to text Sam and Jack the details. "I'm not sure what they want with Rowena, but maybe they want to kidnap her and make use of her talents. She does smell nice. And potion-making skills aren't far-removed from perfumes."

Dean chokes. "What? Rowena smells nice? You've got to be kiddin' me."

"I've got a keen sense of smell."

"Yeah, yeah. I remember." It's hard to forget that Cas had once detected a bladder infection from smelling a corpse.

Dean clears his throat, "But you're saying that humans smell, what, nice to you now? Thought we'd all be more like shitty molecules or walking piles of death."

Cas confiscates the demon's phone and a few handwritten papers before training his eyes on Dean. "I didn't think that would interest you all that much."

There's something in Cas's tilted, upward-gazing expression that feels like a cross-examination, one that will determine if Dean's free to walk or doomed to death row.

"Uh. I'm just fuckin' curious, okay? Demons stink to us, so it would make sense that humans stink to angels."

Cas's answering smile is almost too subtle to catch. "Depends on the human."

"Right. Cause Rowena smells soooo good."

Cas locks the safety on Dean's gun and pockets it. (Dean's gonna need that back eventually.)

"She does. She puts much effort into her personal care. Beauty sleep. Personal spa days. She once told me she frequently bathes in rose petals."

"Are you shittin' me? You like it when humans soak in their own filth with herbs n' crap?"

"I liken it to, what is it you were trying to teach Sam to make a few weeks? With the marinations?"

"Stew?"

"Yes."

"Now I know you're shittin' me."

Cas smiles a little wider, and Dean scoffs.

"And anyway man, if there are demons out-and-about wearing Versace Erose for Men, you gotta give me my gun back."

Cas looks sheepish. "When I was withdrawing your gun, I ripped your holster."

"What the?" Dean's hand goes to his hip. Yup. Holy crap. How does that even happen, by catching one of the metal studs?

“How the fuck did you accidentally rip leather?"

Cas shrugs. "I was under duress."

Dean makes a big show of rolling his eyes as he steps closer. "I don't need a holster to handle a gun, dumbass."

If nothing else, the banter offers a good excuse to plunge his hand into Cas's pocket. Part of him wants to prod further, to tease in the weirdest ways, and he's almost too chicken-shit to do it.

Instead of diving for the pocket, he fingers the hem of Cas's sleeve. "How would you like it if I just up and ripped your clothes, huh?"

Cas straightens, quietly assessing. "It wouldn't bother me, especially if you were in the process of saving my life."

Dean puts two fingers to the inside of Cas's wrist, right where folks tend to dab stuff like cologne. Perfume. Whatever.

It'd be hard to grab Cas's knife from this angle. Dean dimly recalls doing it long-ago. He'd had the Mark of Cain back then, a deep unyielding power that protected the integrity of his skin.

Now, grabbing a triple-blade from here...it'd likely cut him.

"Might, uh, might be good to practice the move sometime. You know. Because we might actually need to grab for each other's, uh, weapons in case of, you know, unexpected...ness. Like today. Might be good to practice so something dumb doesn't happen, like you ripping my holster...or me cutting my hand."

He's horrifically aware that he's babbling.

But Cas doesn't blink. He flips his hand over, extending a loose, open palm, almost like he's reaching for Dean's hand.

"I can trigger my blade, but the timing is important to catch it by the handle."

The corpse of the demon gurgles, like it's still alive. Might be a good idea for Dean to stake him with Cas's blade. Just in case.

"Ready?" Cas asks, and holy shit.

Now?

Dean doesn't know what to say, so he nods frantically. With a Shhhk, the blade snaps out, and Dean snakes his own out to take it. For the briefest of moments, Dean's hand is sandwiched--Cas's blade one one side, Cas's open palm on the other.

Dean firms up his grip and pulls the blade up at the ready. Gives it a little flip to show off his prowess with the triple edge. As always, Cas's blade is unnatural in its perfect, otherworldly balance.

Cas takes a long inhale, and Dean has the urge to tease him again. ("You exercisin' that keen sense of smell, bud?") But before the taunt leaves his lips, there's motion near the door, just over Cas's shoulder.

A man in a cheap suit, raising a gun.

Heart in his throat, Dean acts on instinct. Lets the blade fly.

It hits its target with deadly accuracy, spraying arterial blood from the demon's neck and blinking a shock of demon-black before it thuds to the ground.

Dean's ragged breathing fills the air like a panic attack.

Cas is calmer. As before, he moves off. Then he kneels and yanks his blade out from where it had lodged. He returns it (still bloody) to his sleeve. Then he empties the demon's gun of its angel-blade bullets.

When he crosses the room, he holds the bullets out for Dean to inspect. It's moments like this where Dean wishes that, for all their utilitarian value, bullets like this never existed.

The more invincible Cas can be, the better.

"Did you get empty Bel-air's bullets out, too?"

"Yes."

Cas closes his hand and pockets the rest of the bullets. On the way back from his pocket, he fishes out Dean's gun and extends it.

"Here. We should patrol the parameter."

Dean closes around the gun. "B-be careful," he chokes out. "I don't like that they have those angel-bullets onboard, you know?"

Cas nods, and they move into a guarded position, flattening against the wall and close-crawling towards the exterior of the warehouse.

"Don't like that you can't smell 'em or whatever either," Dean whispers, not expecting a reply.

"Yes. All I can smell right now is you."

It's not the right time for Dean's chest to be hammering this hard, and it's definitely not the time for his mouth to malfunction and spit out the stupidest words since MacArthur Park.

"Do I at least smell better than Rowena?"

The silence goes on too long, and Dean almost forgets to scan the parameter. He's afraid to look back, to see whatever expression (or lack of expression) Cas must be wearing.

"Yes."

Dean's heart does a terrible flip-flop.

"Oh," he rasps. "Good. That's...good. You...yeah."

Suddenly all he wants to do is go home to where it's safe and warm. Not out here where douchebag demons could be lurking around the corner with their melted-down angel-killing bullets.

They patrol the rest of the parameter in silence, while Cas's 'yes' echoes like a skipping records in Dean's head.

When they finally make it back to the car, Dean lets the silence ride. He reaches for the radio, intent on letting music wash away the intensity of the evening.

But before Dean can cover up the silence, Cas breaks it.

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

There's a third-degree burn starting on Dean's neck. "Cas," he grits.

"Many humans smell pleasant to me, Dean. You included."

It's nice for Cas to be the one rambling for once. Dean smirks.

"What, you sayin' 'm not special? I thought my musk was wholesome organic, like a marinated stew."

Cas quirks a brow, surprising Dean with a volley of his own.

"Well. You could use some rose petals."

Dean barks a laugh as he turns up the radio, and Cas leans back with a tiny smile.

"Maybe I will!" Dean shouts over the music.

///

Loosely inspired by this post I didn't wanna bother you with my shit-posting but thanks for the random brainworms

[revvethasmythh]

🤍❤️🏳️‍🌈 for the ask meme!

🤍: Which character is not as morally bad as everyone else seems to think?

I definitely don't think everyone thinks this, just a certain group of people, but since this is the second time I'm answer this one I'll be a little loose with it and say Orym. With some people I think there's this disbelief that he actually is as moral as he presents himself as and, well, I suppose morality is fairly subjective, but he clearly strives to do right by everyone. He only wants to protect people, he wants to save people, he wants to do good in this world and see the world be good. When I see people call him selfish and hypocritical and vengeful and close-minded I'm always like....why are you so determined to misunderstand a character who has been repeatedly stated (by Liam) as someone who wants to "shield the whole world" and hold onto as much goodness and optimism as he can for as long as he can? I suppose it must be a reaction to his conviction in his own morality, and his unwillingness to budge on what he thinks is right. But he is the center of morality in the party for a reason, you know?

❤: Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom?

I THINK this is the question being asked? And my browser changed the icon into the red-heart emoji instead? Let me know if it's not!

TBH, my above answer would also work for this question, but even more so I think Veth can be pretty egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom. She's usually either discussed as comedic relief or The Mom™️, neither of which are capable of encapsulating the complexity of her character. She is funny! She is also a mom! But she's a lot more than just those two things, and relegating her to the funny mom sidekick of other people's stories has never sat right with me

🏳️‍🌈: Which character who is commonly headcanoned as queer doesn't seem queer to you?

Since I answered this question here, and I'm not sure I have another one for CR, I'll flip the question a little. What about a character people say is straight but I think it's wrong?

Yes, I am talking about Veth Brenatto. Too many people have called her het. There was something fruity with her and Yasha long before she was fucking with Beau and Yasha's relationship. We need to give the girl credit for being what she is--a bisexual queen

[nasty-osc-confessions]

i love bickel. i was gonna say they fuck nasty but i prefer them being all gentle nad stupid and sappy (gets rocks thrown at me) SORRRRYYYYYY im dumb and gay

to me its likeee... nickel acts like he's some rough dom but with baseball he's just like >:/->>:] mu boyfriend... i dont care if thats ooc or whatever on twitter like brian i think the red one said baseball was the "only person nickel respected for a while" and that's basically code for they're FAWKINGGGGGGGG. they prolly did it rough the first time but, contrary to what Every Other II Contestant may think, nickel has a stupid gay heart. (nickel voice) FUCKKKKKKKK WHY IS HE CUTE IM NOT GAYYYYYYYY????????????????? you just gotta understand nickel->baseball went from "lol he's kinda hot smirk emoji not in a gay way wink wink" to "gah. he is so hand.some and swe.eeet and um GHHHHHHHHHHHJJJJJJJJJJJ SSSSSSHHUT UP" objectively more gay to think about how much you like feeling like a guy cares about you and respecting HIM when he's sappy fat gay loser (affectionate) who is programmed to Fail than to take it up the butt

i love bickel sex they should fuck but what's the point if they aren't really annoying and gay about it. nickel seeing baseball below him and he's just like "OGHHHHHHHHHHHHH>///////////////<GAAAAAAH FFFFFFFUck i think i have couvid" he WANTS THAT FAT BOY. baseball giving him little kisses and he just pauses to grumble and whack him away. (he will continue doing this even when they're married god bless his soul<3)

anyways nickel's the type to tease his partner(baseball) in bed SORRYYYYYYY there's no way to make this without sounding like he's one of those corny alpha dom daddy guys (he is not he browses reddit for "dank memes" and makes baseball look at him and he would listen to alpha male podcasts and wear axe body spray he's a fucking GEEK) but you gotta hear me out. becauser um well it's HOT and SEXY and my BONER said so!!! it works every time because baseball's jjust a soppy gay mess and also ii's Bottom. oyu see nickel is not a top not at all he's 100% a bottom but BASEBALL is at the bottom of the food chain. like nickel's a bottom but not BASEBALL BOTTOM level. this shit is so stupid um sorry im not a yaoihead

^neither of them can really flirt so their teasing is so stupid too .nickel's probably on reddit asking "how do i make a girl wet in bed" (most repressed gay guy ever men say they're fighting demons and the whole time the demons are bisexuality) and it never works. do not be fooled, however, baseball loves him and he loves baseball back. they love each other because i SAY SO thhey are so in love and so stupid

frotting could've saved them rip fly high

My actual confession beyond my bickel sexo worddump is i dont care enough about ii (or either of these characters seperately LMAOOOO) to rewatch and make sure htey're not ooc in this. im not an ii fan i dnt care for the show or baseball and nickel individually (nickel's my fav but that's because he's funny not because i really care about him as a deep character or anything) i am just Unfortunately hyperfixated on mid yaoi. broken heart emoji

Mid yaoi makes the world go 'round.

[sirenium]

Guys I've struck gold

⚠️Trigger warning: mspec lesbian exclusion (though this is funny to me it still may be a trigger for somebody)⚠️

This is fucking hilarious

[ID: some human Trixie x Starlight Glimmer fanart is in the background. Red text with a white outline that reads 'literally heart broken i loved this art just to find out the creator supports mspec lesbians' followed by a sad face emoji. End ID]

How pathetic do you have to be to be 'heart broken' about the fact that an artist supports someone's identity? 'Wah I can't believe this person supports an identity that my single braincell can't comprehend!' Like imagine you see some cute art, and then you see that the person doesn't scream at people for using comfortable labels and then you're like 'my day is ruined' 💀💀💀

Also TikTok sucks lmfao, at least when it comes to stuff like this; I highly recommend not going on there in hopes of good mspec les/gay content because I swear to fuck most of it was just people whining about our existence in the 'mspec lesbian' tag. I mean, you will find gems like this, so if you want to torture yourself I can't stop ya.

Oh, and if somebody knows the artist, can you send me their way? I love their art style sm./srs /nf

[Banner ID: DNI system/queer exclusiomists, TERFs/SWERFs, truscum/transmeds, anti recovery for harmful paraphilia, anti otherkin, pro-lifers, anti xenogender. A more detailed DNI is in my pinned post. End ID]

[pammei]

Our moms?!

Rindou Haitani x reader (chatfic) 

Chapter 1-3 from Our moms by pammeiwammei (me) on Wattpad

❥@Rindog has followed you.

'Rindou? Followed me?' I glare at my phone deciding if i should call hina or not. "Y/n, done with homework?" "Yes mom" She looks around "Oh by the way you know my new friend Sara? Well I met one of her sons and he goes to your school so I gave him your instagram."

Oh shit.

"Mom, why would you give my instagram to a stranger?!" I yelled at her thinking about what I'm gonna do in school tomorrow.

She looked at me with disappointment "Y/n watch your tone, and there's no harm in making new friends, is this about not wanting to be friends with guys?"

There she goes jumping into conclusions again. "No mom it's just he's not the nicest in my school okay?"

She just nodded and left

☕︎Instagram dms☕︎

❥Rindog: Yo y/n, seen ya around school but never talked to ya

❥Y/n_l/n: Um yeah.. Nice to meet you ig?

❥Rindog: No need to be so awkward i know imma lil intimating but i dont hurt girls

❥Y/n_l/n: Oh my bad for assuming

❥Rindog: all good👍

7:04 seen

❥@Randog has followed you.

'Oh shit, ran too?'

♡@Y/n_l/n has been added to group chat 'bros'♡

❥@Randog: Hey y/n its nice to meet ya ;)

❥@Y/n_l/n: Uh hi? Why was i added?

❥@Rindog: Ran wanted to meet ya Sorz for not askin before adding ya

'Why do they type like that tf'

❥@Randog: Its okay broski they shouldn't be offended over this LMAO

'Broski? BYE THE RED FLAGS'

❥@Y/n_l/n: Sorry my moms calling i gtg byebye.

❥@Rindog: See bro ya scared them away

☕︎Instagram dms☕︎

❥@Rindog: Hey sorry for ran he doesnt know how to talk to girls 4:28 seen Yo im real sorry if we offended ya 5:13 seen

❣︎ Meanwhile on the call with Hina and Emma:

"Why are they so desperate HELP" both I and Hina laugh at Emma's comment on the brothers.

"I don't know man but this whole thing is very suspicious, like how they keep dming me," I say as I try to clean my room "I mean it's funny how thirsty the popular guys are."

"Y/n, Sara just called and told me you've been ignoring her son." mom informs me as I try to hold my laugh

as soon as my mom left my room I look at the screen to see Emma and Hina looking like the skull emoji, then we all laughed so fucking hard I started choking.

"THEY-- REALlY TOLD THEIR- MOM PFFTTT." Emma said as we all started choking and snorting.

❣︎

@Y/n_l/n has added @drakens_bae4life, @Hina_Hanagaki to group chat 'bros'

❥@Randog: who the hell?

❥@drakens_bae4life: really? randog? 💀

❥@Randog: stfu

❥@Hina_Hanagaki: can yall not fight? 😕

❥@Randog can you shut up? 🥺

❥@Rindog: ran shut up for a second

❥@Randog: you a simp? │ ↳ ❥@Rindog: bro 💀  im just being nice bruh chill

♥︎@Randog is typing♥︎ ♡@Randog was kicked♡ ♡@drakens_bae4life was kicked♡ ♡@Hina_Hanagaki was kicked♡

❥@Rindog: y/n i understand that ran is an asshole sometimes hes just a lil messed in the head ya know? dont take the things he says to heart, he probs doesnt mean them just dont argue with him like if things go too far he might hurt you or your friends physically so just bear with him alr?

❥@Y/n_l/n: wow that kinda really nice of you to say thanks ill try but i am a little bit sensitive:(

❥@Rindog: completely understandable if anything he says or does bothers you just dm me ill deal with it Y/n reacted with a '❤︎' 5:48 seen

❣︎

"Y/n you're really quiet what's happening?" Hina asks,

"Rin's actually kinda nice.." I say awkwardly knowing it's gonna surprise them.

"who the fuck are you because you're not Y/n," Emma replied.

" Y/n, ARE YOU BLUSHING? GOODBYE GET SOME REST YOU NEED IT." Emma said and soon after left Hina also left not long after.

❥@Rindog: [link to a server]

❥@Y/n_l/n: sorryz i dont use discord 😋

❥@Rindog: want me to make ya an account?

❥@Y/n_l/n: forsure go ahead

❥@Rindog: user: bald ran#6969 password:ilovecatssm36

❥@Y/n_l/n: you like cats? nice

❥@Rindog: i mean sure but i just picked a random pass

❥@Y/n_l/n: logging in now ❤︎Read 10:19❤︎ As you log in you notice the two people in your friends list 'rindog#6969' and 'randawg#0690'. wow they really need new usernames.

☕︎Discord dms☕︎

❥Rindog: yo :wavingpenis:

❥bald ran: woah hi :catcrying: wait do i have the nitro thing or something?

❥Rindog: yeah thought ya might like it

❥bald ran: stop you didnt have tooooooo im gonna have to pay you back☹️

❥Rindog: NONO dont worry consider it a gift :)

☕︎Instagram groupchat: two married and one single person☕︎

❥@Y/n_l/n: EMMMA HINNAAAAAAAAAAJAJAHSHWHAHAU MEOWWQWWWWWWWWW

(Pretend you see the emotes.)MEOW RAWR MEOWMEOW

❥Hina: OH MY @EMMA LOOK ❥Emma: what? WHAT THE FUCK Y/N Y/N Y/N Y/N REPLY RIGHT FUCKING NOW

❥Y/n: meow 🤭

❥Emma: y/n

❥Y/n: what

❥Emma: you downloaded discord for him? i thought you were over that app after your e dating phase🤨

❥Y/n: BUT HE MADE ME AN ACCOUNT I COULDNT SAY NO

❥Hina: also tell that ran bitch to go eat dick he was suck a dick to me last time😢

❥Y/n: yeah forsure hina

❥Emma: downloading discord rn i was talking to mikey about what happened and he said theres a toman server. drakens there

❥Hina: INVITE ME TOO

☕︎Discord dms: Randawg#0690☕︎

❥bald ran: eat dick (from my friend you argued with last time)

❥randawg: bitch what send addy rn pussyio

❥bald ran youre not scaring anyone LMAO

❥randawg: jeez ok😢

"Y/n Sara just called, im disappointed why would you ever be mean to my friends son?" aint no way "💀"

☕︎Discord dms: Rindog#6969☕︎

❥bald ran: can you and your brother stop telling your mom that im being mean to you guys, i cant play roblox for a week now

❥Rindog: ran did that?🤭

❥bald ran: yes

❥Rindog: brb beating him up

❥bald ran: alright cya goodnight:)

❥Rindog: oh youre sleeping already? goodnight:) ❤︎Reacted with ♡❤︎