#Understanding the Past
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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senshi fans: learning how to make nutritious meals for themselves
laios fans: down bad
marcille fans: lesbianism
chilchuck fans: putting that man in situations
#this is what I've observed over the past few weeks#it's great#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#senshi#laois touden#marcille donato#chilchuck#2000+ notes later and I'm starting to think i read y'all to filth#with exception to senshi fans also being down for him#update at 9000 notes: you can like laois for autism reasons and still be down bad#some of y'all in the tags and fics are down bad for laois in mental way#like you want him to be real so you can do brain crazy with him do you understand
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Unraveling the Tape: How Words from the Past Echo in the Present
Retirement. It’s a time when the relentless march of the nine-to-five halts, giving way to space – space to think, to reflect, to confront the ghosts we’ve shelved in the hustle of daily life. Recently, in this newfound quiet, I stumbled upon an unexpected revelation about myself, a hidden truth that was both jarring and liberating. It’s funny how certain things said to us, particularly during…
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#Breaking Free#Emotional Healing#Healing Journey#Inner Journey#Life After Work#Life Lessons#Mental Wellness#Mindful Living#Past Influences#personal growth#Reflections In Retirement#Retirement Reflections#Self Discovery#Self Perception#Understanding The Past
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i ended up googling how many billionaires there are because of this whole fiasco and there are almost three tHOUSAND billionaires. that is what... trillions of dollars being horded. trillions of dollars that could feed people, house people, educate people. trillions of dollars that could be used to make sanctuaries, protect land and animals, make entire swaths of the world just places where the planet can breathe.
two thousand, seven hundred people. that's just... a particularly dense neighborhood. owning enough wealth to save the world and instead spend on killing it and sometimes killing themselves.
that's what people who go "aw, they're still human beings, aren't they?" don't get. to me, this sounds like fucking space invaders who landed on the planet and just stole the entire food supply. that's not a fellow human being, that is a roadblock to fucking survival. that's my enemy and, yes, i cheer when my enemy dies sometimes.
#like being a billionaire goes past being immoral#you aren't human anymore#and YES i understand the harms of dehumanizing people#but listen#they aren't human#you cant be
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"kabru doesn't even like laios"
meanwhile, kabru:
#i dont even mean this as a romantic thing necessarily its just people do not understand kabrus relationship w laios at all#he was chasing after laios the whole time how could you say he hates or doesnt like laios#labru#kabru#laios touden#dungeon meshi#anyway the characters and relationships in this series are so good and so complex but ppl are incapable of seeing past surface level#and its frustrating
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Visions
#i have so much love for botw link#he remembers nothing but the weight of the sword#he is willing to take in incredible amounts of pain and responsibility just to understand himself and his previous life a bit better#its not as if he’s not responsible and courageous#but this iteration of link has lost so much-even before the game it seems taking his destiny has made him quiet#dunno remember who was it who wrote#‘the sword became a needle snd with the thread of destiny; it sew his lips’#but apart from the desesperation of looking for a trace of himself in all things#he is also guilty and scared of what his past holds#anyways i should write a fanfic not pour this into tags#botw#breath of the wild#link#legend of zelda#master sword#animation#procreate dreams#link botw
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The Charm of Longevity: My Oldest Yet Most Prized Possession
Uncover timeless lessons from my oldest possession - an antique wristwatch. Discover the value in things that stand the test of time. Don't miss it!
Hello there, amazing readers! Today, I’m going to share a little something from my life that speaks volumes about the charm and value of longevity. But before we delve into that, I invite you to join me on Twitter [@GrowMindsetHub]. There, I share regular nuggets of wisdom, fascinating insights, and snippets from my daily life. Don’t miss out on all the exciting content! Now, let’s get into…
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#Antique Wristwatch#Appreciating the Old#Continuity and Change#dailyprompt#dailyprompt-1970#Inspirational Stories#Life Lessons#Longevity and Consistency#Mindfulness#Personal Belongings#Personal Experiences#Personal Growth#Reflecting on the Past#Time and its Value#Time Management#Understanding the Past#Valuing Possessions
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Monster hunter au part 3
Also known as “Drift is a giant fox beast” comic ahah
I like to think these trails are really important as a safe space for Deadlock. This is his home, these are his favorite routes and his familiar and safe space.
So when he shows his paths to Ratchet it's a big gesture of trust. Because they're what makes the forest his home and he's willing to let Ratchet into that home:)
<- Previous part Next
Also. This au exists in the same world as my Spellbound au. Just in case you wanna break your heart a little bit
#maccadam#transformers#dratchet#ratchlock#drift#deadlock#ratchet#Orion Pax#Prowl#Shockwave#Senator Shockwave#monster hunter au#yea so uh#monster hunter au connects to spellbound au#monster hunter au is happening in the past#so Shockwave is still alive and well#ai think you can consider this being a tiny bit of his backstory as a knight and teacher#I wonder how many people will care understand this fucked up timeline lol#Pax being a menace eheheh#I love Pax being a menace
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sad: falling out of a hyperfixation
tragic: watching your beloved friends and mutuals fall out of the hyperfixation while you're still in it
#oughhhhhhh#this is about the dca fandom but also about every other strong fixation ive had over the years lol#i know it's normal and inevitable esp for less popular works or minor characters with little canon content#and there's nothing wrong with smaller communities of course those rock#but there’s just something special about getting into something at the same time as a lot of other people all at once#and existing in this chaotic fandom space that's just bursting with creativity and passion#i've been in fandom spaces for as long as some of you have been alive and i've only come across that sort of unbridled joy like#a handful of times at best#it's just a heartbreaking feeling to see real lightning in a jar fandoms like that wither away as people drift away#(understandably so!)#anyway don't mind me i'm just having thoughts#musing about fandoms past as well#that i too eventually moved on from but remember fondly even if im not active in anymore#also my music just aint hitting right so im just sitting in silence which makes me more Contemplative(tm)
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more body swap au ideas, pt2
pt1 of said au
#hsr fanart#honkai fanart#aventurine#aventio#dr ratio#ratiorine#hsr aventurine#bodyswap au#riddle doodle#work killed me and i only have time to finish now hsdjfhds#its true about height ive seen my tall friends getting hit by short ceiling and i just walk past it without much thought#also do think aventurine is smart enough to memorise- but does he understand??? not as much as ratio tbh#theyre coping basically theyre doing their best#small smirk ratio on aven's body........#i also just have a need to see ratio being carried not matter what
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oc posting continues
#the design has barely changed in the past two years but also everything about it has changed. you understand#my art#slugcat oc
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hello cookierun nation here are all of the cookie cosplays i humbly offer to ye that ive done so far. love those lil dudes
#my cosplay#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#crk#cosplay#cookie run cosplay#i'd kiss the character designer for cookierun square on the lips they do such a good job of understanding the fundamentals of design#i mean obviously im not doing 1:1 translations on any of these but they provide a spectacular base from the official work#the fact that cookierun is the only series ive done multiple costumes for in the past few years#hopefully shows how fond i am of their design style#although to be fair the other series that ive done 2 costumes for lately is genshin impact and not to be negative#but i cannot stand genshin impacts character design approach it literally keeps me up at night how much i hate it
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X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST 2014 | dir. Bryan Singer
#i love this movie so goddamn much you don't understand#gifs*#xmenedit#xmdofp#dofpedit#x men#x men days of future past#marveledit#marvel#movieedit#moviegifs#filmedit#filmgifs#tvfilmedit#charles xavier#logan howlett#wolverine#professor x#marvelgifs#dailymarvel#marveldaily#marvellegends#marveladdicts#x-men
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SAY DO YOU REMEMBER
#natm#night at the museum#jedtavius#the 21st night of september#natm jedediah#natm octavius#yes I’m posting this 30 minutes past midnight so it’s technically not the 21st anymore but SHUT UP#I gave Jed scruffy patchy little trans boy beard for deep and personal reasons nobody could ever understand (bc I wanted to)#and I gave Octavius a baby mullet bc it’s what he deserves
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re: that HEFTY siffrin sweep on id5’s isat favourite blorbos poll — this might sound silly but i do actually think it’s kinda fascinating that isat, as a game so inseparably steeped in (for lack of a better way to describe it) queer fandom culture, managed to so completely sidestep the common Fandom Phenomenon that i suspect was behind the poll in the first place by creating a main character that is also overwhelmingly the fan favourite character for once.
obviously there are any number of factors we could point at to explain the extent to which siffrin nomiddlenames nolastnames manages to grab people and absolutely not let go, but personally i think one of the most interesting ones to consider is the one specific to the medium — that is, how siffrin subverts the “silent blank slate video game protagonist” archetype in such a way that happens to be primo brainrot breeding grounds.
like, when a video game dev makes a silent protagonist it’s usually a bid to maximize immersion by closing the aesthetic distance between player and character as much as possible, right? which is especially true of rpg video games — players find connection in the generic, as that is what gives you the freedom of motion to insert yourself into the story in whatever unique shape suits you best. you are your character and your character is you.
(as ever, post ran long. yall know the drill. tossin in a quick header pic before thoughts on blank slates & blorboification continue under the cut)
and then you’ve got siffrin, who is expressly pointed out to be the taciturn type; who when initially giving the player exposition about their journey so far doesn’t seem to hint at a life or history or even really any motivations outside the journey; whose every thought and action is narrated in second person so as to keep tracing and re-tracing the connection between him and you.
even their design — all darkless and shapeless, bundled up in that big cloak, as if an invitation for you to fill it in with whatever lets you relate to them most! at this point they are their own character for sure, but they also have enough very clear parallels going on with the silent protagonist archetype to feel more than accidental.
of course, as you keep playing you start to recognize that his blankness is much, much more than just a grab at immersion; his apparent lack of backstory, itself a fundamental piece of backstory. this is where he flips dramatically in the player’s perception from “generic vessel for story delivery” to “thoroughly multidimensional character trapped within endless torment nexus custom-built to target and exacerbate all his very specific worst traits rooted in very specific traumas”.
yknow, the good stuff !
but by then you have also been playing enough to be feeling the effects of the thing isat’s design does best of all. i’m talkin bout that ludonarrative lockstep baby. every piece of isat’s gameplay is designed to make you feel what siffrin is feeling — you understand by now that he is not a stand-in for you, but all the same you share in his frustration, his grief, his rare moments of joy and the subsequent heart-in-your-shoes devastation when that joy is inevitably poisoned — and through it all, the desperate grasping for anything new — all as if they were every bit your own.
so in this way the connection is maintained, even if you were someone for whom siffrin’s particular traits & struggles might not otherwise cause you relate to them at all if you had encountered them elsewhere, in a setting where you weren’t actively controlling them as a player. siffrin still gets to carry all the “just like me fr” impact of the blank slate protagonist in the tropes he embodies and in the game mechanics’ design, while totally free to evolve completely into his own character and keep you relating to closely them all the same. now toss back in the fact that said traits & struggles very much ARE of a flavour that a great many people Would Tend To Relate To and just like that you’ve got a perfect storm cookin.
too individual and compellingly written to be an empty vessel for plot delivery. too closely connected with the player’s emotional state to be a story observed impassively from the outside. he has 92 mental illnesses and for the low low price of free u can give him yours to carry too. nobody is doin it like him. congratulations on your well-deserved nose sniffrin nomiddlenames nolastnames <3
#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#isat siffrin#sniffrin#been trying to write this post for the past two days straight but it kept escaping me for some reason#luckily we got trapped in airport hell round 2 and apparently there’s just something about these spaces that gets the post juice flowing#& i wanted to be rid of it#shrug#i don’t think i’ve necessarily vocalized much that’s really new here but sniffrin poll just has me thinkinnnnn#also i am making an active effort to not apologize for writing words on the Writing Words website. thank u for ur understanding mwah#atlasisms
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Ohhh, I'm rereading Mystra's entry in the Sword Coast Adventurer's Guide... and this detail:
This means Gale was punished for trying to restore and preserve what he thought was a lost piece of Mystra's magic. Gale being Mystra's ex-lover put aside. He as her follower, she his goddess, was punished for attempting to do the one foundational rule of her faith.
I'm seething and so sad at the same time.
Edit: I used the word punish loosely, as in, toxic/abusive people will take any small mistake or action and twist it into something they can take advantage of. This post was also largely from the stand point of a toxic deity rather than a toxic partner, but both takes are valid here. Especially with the, “you didn’t stay compliant so now I’m giving you the silent treatment” part of it—from a god and a partner perspective.
#bg3 spoilers#rambles#bg3#bg3 gale#gale bg3#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#gale baldurs gate 3#baldurs gate gale#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate 3#baldurs gate#I understand different versions of Mystra exist#but the bg3 version of her makes me seethe#all the time#TAGS PAST HERE ARE UPDATES#this post was most about comments on the religious trauma aspect#character flaws make character great so I know Gale isn’t perfect#but yeah I do read Mystra as a groomer with the comments minsc gave#like I hate her as a person#her character contribution makes the story interesting but I just objectively can’t excuse anything she does#she makes me feel enraged because they literally had to hide weave gifted boys from her#hello??? I’m sorry but you can’t make me like her or excuse her treatment towards gale after that knowledge#sorry I’m getting heated but goodness I have to say it or it’s going to make me implode
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