#Trauma Responses: Fight Flight Freeze Fawn

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: Trauma Responses

Over-sharing

Over-explaining

Trauma dumping

Hyper-independence

Hypersexualization

People pleasing

Trauma is a mental injury, and our body may react to unconscious memories of significant negative events unknown even to us. Our body subconsciously protects us from future trauma.

How we respond to trauma has consequential implications on how we live our lives. Trauma responses ensure physical and emotional safety; however, these unintended reactions may interfere with our ability to flourish.

Trauma responses are innate; they occur without our consciousness.

A reaction to a perceived threat is called a trauma response. It is a survival instinct; it is reflexive and automatic.

Your body reacts to this perceived threat without your approval. Smells and sounds may remind your clients of the trauma they experienced and bring about memories that perhaps at one time were repressed. Despite the individual’s awareness, the unconscious self still remembers, and the body reacts.

A trauma response is how your nervous system has adapted following a significant situation and can manifest in various ways, whether there is an actual threat, or a threat is perceived.

Trauma responses cause a person to be hypervigilant, which may create an overwhelmed individual under normal circumstances. Contrarily, a person experiencing hypervigilance may also prove to be an effective person during crises. Trauma responses get a bad rap; however, if clients can recognize them, they can prevent them from controlling their lives.

Typical Trauma Response Types

Originally, fight and flight were thought to be the only responses to stress, which focused on the autonomic nervous system (McCarty, 2016; Katz et al., 2021).

Freeze, as a trauma response type, was later developed after observing lab rats in stressful situations (Katz et al., 2021).

Today, the 4 most commonly known trauma response types include fight, flight, freeze, and fawn. Each of these actions is an adaptive, functional short-term survival counteraction.

Fight

As we know, the fight response involves combativeness toward the perpetrator. Example demonstrations of fight may include kicking, punching, or threatening the attacker (Katz et al., 2021). It may also include being verbally argumentative and yelling.

If an individual is quick to anger, they may be demonstrating a fight trauma response. This symptom of arousal may indicate self-criticism when someone feels internally threatened (Germer & Neff, 2015).

This reaction may include any attempt to stand up against a threat. It is a form of assertiveness. At a healthy level, it delineates healthy boundaries.

At a primal level, if an animal feels it is being attacked, it may choose to fight back if the threat is manageable. If the animal feels that it cannot successfully fight the threat, it may resort to our next trauma response.

Flight

Flight involves literally or metaphorically running from an actual or perceived danger. It is an act of nonconfrontation and avoidance of a threat. More importantly, it is a biologically determined sequence of responses to stress (Bracha, 2004). Flight is a disengagement from the stress-inducing stimulus. Paired with fight, it is the cornerstone of stress response research by Walter B. Cannon (McCarty, 2016).

Flight may include the habit of leaving the room or fleeing from the home following an argument. It may also include drug and alcohol abuse to avoid emotions. Further, individuals demonstrating the flight response may be disconnected from their family, friends, or coworkers. Someone exhibiting the flight response may isolate themselves.

Over-sharing, over-explaining, and trauma dumping may indicate compartmentalization. If an individual shows compartmentalization, it may mean that they are unconsciously trying to distance themselves from the trauma, thus allowing them to speak of the event nonchalantly.

Further, this practice allows the individual to avoid direct confrontation or processing of the distressing experience. Considering the purpose of divulging the information, this response could also be intended to gain attention (Shabahang et al., 2022), including sympathy or validation.

Individuals may be unconsciously seeking external support or validation to cope with the trauma. Seeking refuge or solace in the empathy or validation of others is an illustration of the flight response.

Hyper-independence occurs when an individual internalizes that dependence on others is unsafe. They avoid asking for help and instead build a wall. This could be a trauma response of flight, as the individual is avoiding an interaction or relationship.

Hypersexualization may also suggest a flight response. Someone who is hypersexual may be fleeing from other emotions.

Likewise, this response may also represent the fawn response as an attempt to please others, which we will discuss later.

Freeze

This is an effective technique when fight or flight are not an option (d’Andrea et al., 2013). When the typical fight-or-flight responses are put on hold, this is considered the freeze response (Kozlowska et al., 2015).

This stress response involves the typical stop, look, and listen response and commands hypervigilance (Bracha, 2004). An individual may resort to this response when assessing a situation. Some suggest this response precedes the fight-or-flight, as the animal or victim is determining which response to employ.

Example: During a bear encounter, physically attacking the bear may be unwise; likewise, running from the bear may not be helpful either. Feigning death may be your way out of this critical situation. This immobility eliminates auditory and visual clues that would otherwise provoke aggression (Baldwin, 2013).

Binge eating could be considered a freeze response (Rodriguez-Quiroga et al., 2021). Instead of facing the situation, a person who engages in binge eating consumes an unusually large amount of food in a relatively short amount of time. This type of food consumption may serve as self-soothing behavior or self-medication.

Eating large quantities of food may induce a dissociative state, thus providing an escape and helping to cope with the overwhelming experience of trauma. This type of eating disorder can be just as dangerous as bulimia and anorexia.

This stress response helps the individual to hide, and it shows that you are not a threat. Further, the person experiencing the freeze response is provided the opportunity to process the threat.

Fawn

This lesser-known and least-understood trauma response may be confused with being a character trait. Arguably, this may be the only response where one engages with the potential threat and attempts to change the other person’s behavior. The trauma response stems from our innate need for social connection and co-regulation.

In this response, a person may mirror the other individual’s gestures, facial expressions, or speech. They are hypervigilant about everyone’s happiness and safety in the room.

Physically speaking, individuals who consistently show fawning as their trauma response may also experience temporomandibular joint disorder (TMJ), more commonly known as lockjaw, or pain in their jaw (Kim et al., 2009). They are overly agreeable and frequently sacrifice their boundaries.

For example, a man orders a well-done steak with a side salad from a notable restaurant. What he receives is a steak that is cooked medium rare with a side of French fries. That was not his order; however, he does not bring this oversight to the server’s attention for fear of disappointing someone, whether that be the wait staff or the chef.

People who frequently demonstrate the fawn response may be described as people pleasers, workaholics, over-explainers, and over-apologizers. During a traumatic event, a victim may experience Stockholm syndrome, which is when an individual attempts to appease one’s abuser or captor (Bailey et al., 2023).

Codependency can also be a fawn response (Walker, 2013). This is an unhealthy and dysfunctional relationship dynamic involving one person assuming the role of the “giver.” This response may also be referred to as the “friend” and “appease” response.

Lesser-Known Responses to Trauma

Besides the typical fight, flight, freeze, and fawn, there are a few more responses you may not be familiar with. Fright, flag, and faint are a few of the lesser-known trauma responses that are theorized by professionals of this field.

Fright

The fright response indicates tonic immobility. At first, the freeze response was theorized; however, it soon became apparent that this response could be differentiated from fright (Katz et al., 2021).

Similar to freeze and faint, the person experiencing fright will play dead, so to speak (Bracha, 2004). This is better understood when a predator has its prey in its grasp, and the prey goes limp and ceases its struggle to make itself less desirable for consumption. In this case, the fright response involves a heightened state of arousal and readiness to confront or flee from danger.

Flag

The flag response is characterized by numbness of emotion, cognitive failure, a drop in arousal, and surrender. Schauer and Elbert (2015) assert that the flag response is part of a sequence of six fear responses that progress as a function of defense during a life-threatening situation. The cascade consists of the following responses in sequential order: freeze – flight – fight – fright – flag – and faint.

The individual’s attention may be elsewhere, and they may feel like they are observing themself, which is an example of disassociation. This is a built-in defense mechanism that increases pain tolerance or numbs emotional response.

The person who experienced the trauma may exhibit memory lapses as their brain attempts to protect its emotional well-being.

Faint

Also a biologically determined response to acute stress defense, faint is a lesser-known response (Bracha, 2004).

This may also be referred to as the “flop” response, also indicative of tonic immobility and is a preferable option for the body when fight or flight is not possible. A common example of this phenomenon is when a person sees blood and literally faints from the sight of it. They are not “playing dead” as illustrated in the fright response; their body unconsciously suspends movement.

Instead of the arousal and readiness associated with the fright response, this type of response centers around immobility in response to overwhelming stress.

Clients who have been diagnosed with PTSD may benefit from the following techniques:

Sensory Grounding

To help them ground themself and bring awareness, encourage your client to try the following practice: Name 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste.

They could also carry a grounding smell, such as a scented lotion, perfume, or cologne, or carry a grounding sensory object, such as a fidget or soft item.

These grounding tools can be used discretely and have profound effects.

Cognitive Grounding

A process where clients must show themselves that they are safe.

They could verbally review the following thoughts: Remind yourself where the trauma occurred and how physically far you are from that location. Remind yourself when the trauma occurred and how long ago that was. Repeat inspiring quotes say coping statements such as:

I can handle this.

These feelings are temporary.

My present situation is different.

Source ⚜ More: Writing Notes & References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

[randomfoggytiger]

X-Files Scully Trauma Responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Fawn?

Picking up from this post about Mulder, we have Scully's turn!

There are four main trauma responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn (taken from the book Complex CPTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker-- see Disclaimers section below for info.) In short: Fight Types respond to stress with physical intimidation or verbal bullying; Flight Types run as far as they can from danger (physically or metaphorically), fleeing or distracting their minds with obsessive-compulsive work; Freeze Types disassociate, seeing fight and flight as futile and becoming numb to life; and Fawn Types try to win favor from their oppressor, leaning co-dependently on others.

Scully's Primary Trauma Response Type

Flight Types

"A Flight response is triggered when a person responds to a perceived threat by fleeing; or, symbolically, by launching into hyperactivity. .... Extreme Flight types are like machines with a switch stuck in the 'on' position. They are obsessively and compulsively driven by the unconscious belief that perfection will make them safe and loveable. They rush to achieve. They rush as much in thought in action, compulsion."

Beyond the Sea explored the breadth of Scully's Flight Type Trauma Response: Scully tried to avoid the pain of her father's death by distracting herself with work before the funeral; but was forced to sit in her feelings of inadequacy and beg for reassurance of his fatherly pride from her mother. "Was he at all proud of me?" is the backbone of her type, just as it was in relation to her partnership with Mulder, her daughterly duties to Maggie, her sisterly duties to Bill, and her professional duties as a medical doctor, Academy instructor, and field agent. Furthermore, this episode laid the groundwork for the infamous hallway scene in Fight the Future. As Rob Bowman stated: "‘I need you, I need you.’ That’s a theme of the movie – Mulder needs Scully. And never before has he come to that understanding quite so strongly as he does in this story. So she’s running because she’s afraid that he’s going to talk her out of it, and so the best thing she can do is hit the elevator button and go, go, go."

Classic Flight Type, classic.

(An interesting note: As stated above, Scully's "machine" is stuck in the "on" position-- the exact opposite of Mulder's type, which is stuck in the "off" position. Scully's traumatic response is to bury herself in obsessive-compulsive disordered behavior to distract from the lack of control she has over her life--finding refuge in long-working hours or needlessly consuming chores-- after her father's death, Emily's death, Mulder's disappearance and death, her mother's death, her son's fake death, etc. While Scully seeks out tasks, people, and duties from life (a.k.a. whether that be her on-the-clock job or extra busywork on weekends and holidays), Mulder retreats from people during his traumatic responses, becoming reclusive and alienated, dungeonIng himself away from life in his basement or leather couch.)

But what if her primary trauma response isn't working fast enough to combat fear or danger? In this case, Scully will develop a secondary trauma response, the polar opposite of her dominant one:

Flight-Fawn Types

Flight-Fawn Types (also known as Super Nurses, ironically) turn the obsessive-compulsive workaholism of the Flight Type into the bend-over-backwards self-imposed slavery of the Fawn Type. As Pete Walker explains: "The Fawn-Flight Type is the most typically seen in the busy-holic parent, nurse, or administrative assistant who works from dawn until bedtime providing for the needs of the house, the hospital, or company. He" [she] "compulsively takes care of everyone else's needs with hardly a gesture towards his own. The Fawn-Flight is sometimes a misguided Mother Theresa-type who escapes the pain of her self-abandonment by seeing herself as the perfect, selfless caregiver. She further distances herself from her own pain by obsessively-compulsively rushing from one person in need to another. Some Fawn-Flight clients become OCD-like clean-aholics."

As we know, Scully fashions herself as Mulder's partner, primary caretaker, and right-hand Starbuck, while also acting as his translator, justifier, and report writer to the higher ups.

When Mulder messes up in all areas of his life, she flies in to patch him up and cover for him. This, of course, is fulfilling... but it's also distracting, purposefully so. Her Flight-Fawn Response also emerges its head whenever she tries to placate her brother Bill: cut off from Flight, she will utilize Fawn-- letting him ramble, pushing back only a little while pleading for understanding-- before ultimately volleying back to Flight whenever he gives her enough room to squeeze by and make her escape. Even on her last legs during the cancer arc, Scully still got swept up into verifying Mulder's quest against her previously expressed wishes--Flight-Fawn in full effect.

Why Scully Is Not Primarily Fight, Freeze, or Fawn

Fight Types

"A Fight response is triggered when a person suddenly responds aggressively to something threatening. ...Fight Types are unconsciously driven by the belief that power and control can create safety, assuage abandonment, and secure love...." Fight Types often become bullies or narcissists to their loved ones as well as their enemies if left unchecked. At their worst, they can become demanding, demeaning, and punishing because they equate strength as power exerted to weaken a threat. Fight is the first Trauma Response all humans develop; and if it's used effectively, Fight Responders stick to this "effective" method rather than trying out others (the second Flight, third Freeze, or fourth Fawn.) This translates to a bitter outlook on the world, always suspicioning the motives of others in cruel or judgmental ways. Severely traumatized Flight Types usually grew up in homes where they had to fight back against physical abuse or protect others from it. Dana Scully, while aggressive and cantankerous in the face of sniveling injustice, never uses her anger as a way to control or manipulate others; nor does she see other humans as self-interested threats.

Freeze Types

"A Freeze Response is triggered when a person, realizing resistance is futile, gives up, numbs out into dissociation, and/or collapses, as if accepting the inevitability of being hurt…. The Freeze Response, also known as the Camouflage Response, also triggers a survivor into hiding, isolating, and avoiding human contact. The Freeze Type can be so frozen in the retreat mode that is seems as if their "Starter” button is stuck in the “off” position. While all 4 F Types commonly suffer from social anxiety as well, Freeze Types typically take a great deal more refuge in solitude." These Types have learned from a young age that fighting back will only get you punished and that fleeing will only get you reprimanded; so, they collapse in on themselves instead. Dana Scully wields her independent agency freely and often, so this is definitely not her primary Type.

Fawn Types

"Fawn response is triggered when a person responds to threat by trying to be pleasing or helpful in order to appease and forestall an attacker.... Fawn Types seek safety by merging with the wishes, needs, and demands of others. They act as if they believe that the price of admission to any relationship is the forfeiture of all their needs, rights, preferences, and boundaries. The disenfranchisement of the Fawn Type begins in childhood... learns early that a modicum of safety and attachment can be gained by becoming the helpful and compliant servant of... exploitive parents." (As an aside, this type is formed from having at least one narcissistic parent who beat wore down the first natural human response-- Fight-- the second response-- Flight-- and the third response-- Freeze-- until all that is left is Fawn.) Dana Scully has never kowtowed or cheaply sold her self-respect to appease to others; and has only ever dipped into the Fawn Response as a capitulation or bargaining tool, hence why it is her secondary and not primary response.

Thank you for reading~

Enjoy!

**Disclaimers: Most of the information was obtained from Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker, a private counselor and lecturer for thirty-five years. As a victim of CPTSD himself, he made a study of its victims and helped craft a system for CPTSD recoverees to understand themselves and progressively heal. (Highly recommend his book-- excellent.)

[rapeculturerealities]

Art by Sarah Burgess

[furiousgoldfish]

being around abusers:

high alert: you never know when the abuse is coming

hyper-focusing on the abuser's mood, you're only allowed to feel relief if the abuser seems to be in a good mood, distracted, or focused on somebody else

constant vigilance because they might decide to focus on you any second and you need to be ready

unable to focus on your tasks because you're tense and waiting to see if they'll want something from you, want to do something to you, or start to verbally abuse, provoke, insult, taunt, criticize or humiliate you

always aware of the physical distance between you and how much it would take them to cross it; reaction of panic if they turn your direction or show intent of approaching

quickly forced to think of an escape plan or a fight plan if they do keep approaching you because it is already an intimidation and likely to escalate in violence

anxiety if you're prompted to speak; you are not allowed to say anything positive about yourself or it will be challenged and mocked, you are usually asked to volounteer information and you will be attacked if you refuse. But if you do give info, it will be used against you.

constant effort needs to be put in controlling the amount of rage, or alternatively, helplessness you feel in their presence. You are not allowed to show any symptoms of it, or symptoms of panic

desperate use of logic and rationality in the face of senseless and cruelty of the abuse; you're trying to explain why the abuser should not say and do horrid and cruel things to you, and why you don't deserve it, only for them to do it worse and insist that they're 'saying the truth' or 'listing the imaginary reasons you do deserve it (you are not a person to them)'

attempts to defend yourself from the abuse or exploding and attacking back, only to immediately be accused of abuse and cruelty and 'lack of self control' while the abuser is not even affected by your attempts

the abuser getting anyone in the vicinity to side with them and to participate/enable the abuse, making you feel like your entire environment is hostile and dangerous, and like you are not a person to anyone

All of these can feel normal when you're used to living like that, or if you've grown up in this environment. Having to constantly defend and prove yourself and to have be hyper-focused on those around you and anxiously anticipate their every move, can feel like a normal experience if you haven't experienced any other home environment. This is not normal. If this is how you live, you are living in abuse. None of this should be inflicted at you.

[hauntedselves]

What Survival Looks Like at Home

From 'What Survival Looks Like at Home' by Helen Townsend, from Beacon House & Inner World Work (PDF)

Quick cheat sheet:

Noticing Freeze

Bored, not interested

Confused, forgetful

Distracted, not listening

Clumsy

Talking about something else

Not moving to where you’ve asked

Scanning the room

Wide eyed, pupils might dilate

Daydreaming, staring into space

Grounding Freeze

Stay with me, don’t leave me

Tell me I’m ok & that I am safe

Watching TV

Deep breathing

Spinning on a swing

Climbing & hanging

Rolling or cycling down a hill

Digging in mud or sand

Jumping on a trampoline

Do my chores with me

Gently wonder where I have gone & invite me back to you

If I have forgotten what I was supposed to be doing, remind me again gently

Hot chocolate & toast

A warm bath & a warm towel

A soft teddy for bedtime

Noticing Flight

Hyperactive, manic, silly

Aggressive, threatening: stiffening up, clenching fists

Running away, escaping, disappearing, hiding under the table/bed/sofa

Clumsy

Disruptive, loud & noisy

Can’t cope with free play

Can’t follow house rules

Not doing what you’ve asked

Lonely

Keeping super busy

Baby talk/silly voices

Bumping into people

Needing to get into the car/house/park first

Grounding Flight

Keep me close by

Find me again happily or patiently

Deep breathing

Give me a familiar & easy chore

Crunchy foods – carrot sticks, a biscuit, a rice cake or crisps

Tell me that I am safe with you

Hanging from monkey bars

Talk through what you think I am finding tricky using a kind voice

Heavy blankets

Create a safe space where I can hide away I when I need to

Tug of war

Cup of warm milk or hot chocolate

Hot water bottle & a soft teddy

Recognize I sometimes find 'normal' family life threatening

Accept that if I feel threatened, I feel in real danger.

If you send me to do something & I forget, just patiently ask again

Noticing Fight

Hot and bothered

Argumentative, angry and aggressive

Controlling, demanding and inflexible

Lie or blaming

Unable to concentrate on one thing

Unable to follow the house rules

Confrontational

Disrespectful

Disregarding of others, pushing away friends/family members

Shouting, loud and noisy

Immature

Grounding Fight

Tell me you love me even when my I push you away

Don’t punish me for being cross; reward me with your kindness and love for getting calm again

Keep me safe from hurting myself

Match my energy

Deep breathing

Chewy foods

Support me socially

Hanging, swinging and climbing

Warm bath with lots of bubbles

Warm milk or a hot chocolate

Hot water bottle

A super soft teddy and/or blanket

Give me a task that makes me feel important

Connect with me and show me empathy before exploring the consequences of my behavior

Create somewhere safe to go to so I can calm down

Make things predictable. Tell me about changes before they happen, especially if strangers are coming to the house or I’m going somewhere new

Accept I might not know why I behaved in that way & I might not remember what happened

Listen and acknowledge how I feel, even if you see it differently, it will help me feel listened to

Noticing Submit

Unhappy, low mood

Alone or withdrawn

Fidgety but not disruptive, anxious

Never questioning or asking questions

Never drawing unnecessary attention

Yes or no answers - doing just enough to avoid being noticed, unable to think

Quiet & passive, compliant

Grounding Submit

See me, listen to me

Give me small repetitive things to do

Weighted blanket

Building with Lego or Play-doh

Tell me I am safe

Deep breathing

Swinging

Let me spend quiet time just with you

Understand that social media might symbolizes a comforting connection

Hot chocolate and a crunchy biscuit

Wrap me up in a soft blanket & watch TV

Understand that playing computer games, lets me be by myself somewhere safe

Recognize I am hurting inside & might need professional help

Know that I am easily bullied, look out for this, don’t expect me to tell you.

Notice I will say what I think you want me to say

Be aware that I am an easy target & can be coerced easily to keep the peace

Know I can't cope being the center of attention

Watch for me removing myself

Warm bath and a warm towel

Warm pyjamas

[sage-hazeline]

i’m not pathetic for fawning.

i shouldn’t get angry at myself for fawning.

it’s protected me from harm, it’s kept me safe.

fawning doesn’t make me pathetic. it is an indication that i am faced with a person who cannot regulate their emotions and who unduly directs their emotions at me. fawning is an indication that my body is working, working to keep me safe because it has learned from experience that this person’s behaviour will harm me.

i am not pathetic for trying to create safety for myself in a situation where the other person is emotionally volatile.

sometimes fawning makes me feel pathetic because i’m not expressing my true feelings or thoughts, because i feel like i can’t.

but i need to be compassionate with myself and interpret my fawning as something that has kept me safe, and it does not make me pathetic or feeble or spineless.

[aashiquidreams]

After watching the Netflix show Baby Reindeer, I found myself wrestling with difficult emotions. It helped me recognize that the behavior portrayed in the show is termed trauma bonding. This realization shed light on my own experiences, particularly what happened to me in 2022/2023 with the person who sexually assaulted me during a first date. It’s worth noting that months before I went out with him, he seemed to constantly appear wherever I went in my neighborhood, leading me to question whether it was all just a coincidence. Looking back and considering what I’ve since learned about him, it’s clear that there may have been ulterior motives behind his presence. I’ve come to realize that I don’t believe in coincidences, especially after everything that happened.

Reflecting on the unsettling dynamics of my past encounters with him, one particular incident stands out vividly in my memory. After one of my attempts to break off contact with him, he unexpectedly appeared at my door three months later while delivering food. He knew there are only two restaurants that I order from. I wasn’t aware that he had started working at one of them, and seeing him brought back waves of fear and discomfort. Despite my shock at his sudden appearance, I found myself frozen, unable to react, pretending as if everything was normal. He started crying and asked me why I had ignored and blocked him, further intensifying my feelings of confusion and discomfort. His sudden appearance caught me completely off guard.

I never reported him to the police because I wasn’t sure if it was seen as harassment and sexual assault and was too ashamed because I froze during the assault. When I got myself tested after the assault, I even lied to the doctor about the reason for the test. I also never shared this experience with anyone, and when I tried to talk about it with one of my friends, his response was unsupportive. It made me feel invalidated and silenced, preventing me from opening up about the full extent of what had really happened. My other friend was often too busy and had a tendency to label her friends based on whether or not they were ‘drama-free.’ Feeling unsure of how she would react, I hesitated to confide in her as well. I also considered telling my mom since she knew I went on a date with him when it happened, but I held back. Her tendency to become verbally aggressive and use such information against me left me feeling unable to share the truth with her. During one of the breathwork sessions I did in March, I allowed myself to cry and grieve about the assault and all that happened around it. I felt like I grieved a part of me that died in that awful experience. However, despite this emotional release, I still couldn’t bring myself to talk about it when we were sharing afterwards. Perhaps it was because of shame and fear of being misunderstood. Writing about it here feels somewhat as a relief, and hopefully, in a way, it helps others with similar experiences.

After struggling with the emotional aftermath of the assault and struggling to find support from those around me, I found myself resorting to smoking weed every night before bed as a means to numb my emotions and ignore the reality of what had happened. Understanding this dynamic has provided valuable insight into my own journey. Quitting weed 111 days ago was a significant step for me, and the serendipitous discovery of this timing today fills me with surprise and affirmation, strengthening my resolve to quit and my decision to write about it. It turned out to be one of the best decisions I’ve made, and perhaps I wouldn’t have come to this point of realization if I hadn’t. I can now work on forgiving myself and letting go of the self-blame, understanding that freezing during the assault was a common reaction to the overwhelming situation.

Whenever he contacted me, I acted like nothing had happened. It took me over a year and a lot of dark secrets of his that I had found out to break things off for good with him. Looking back, I realize in how much danger I actually was – his brother is arrested and is a first-degree murder suspect, and he himself is suffering from mental issues as a war veteran and has a case against him for rape and assault. When I froze during the assault, it may have saved my life. Things could have gotten so much worse had I resisted. As I continue on my journey of healing, I hold onto the hope that I will never have to cross paths with him or endure his presence again.

Reflecting on the complexities of trauma, upbringing, and conditioning, and their profound impact on our behavior, I am reminded of the interconnectedness of these past experiences. It’s through understanding and acknowledging these layers of past traumas and conditioning that we can begin to unravel their effects on our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. By looking into the root causes and patterns that have shaped our responses, we gain insight into the ways in which past experiences continue to influence our present lives. This process forms the foundation for healing and growth, empowering us to navigate challenges with resilience and compassion for ourselves and others.

[karizard-ao3]

I am about to go to bed, but real quick. I did this training at work today which included trauma responses to conflict. It got me thinking:

Fight: Asuka

Flight: Shinji

Freeze: Rei

Fawn: Kaworu (kind of?)

Is it possible that each of these four pilots represents a different trauma response? Maybe not intentionally, but it's kind of a cool - bah! What's the word? I'm too tired for this. I just wanted to throw this ideo out there before I forgot about it.

Poor Toji doesn't get one, but if I had to make one up for him it would be Flash, because dropping his drawers was his knee jerk reaction to Asuka slapping him.

[gabby-i-guess]

I need less of the Fawn Response and more of the Fuck You Response.

[rainsoftenings]

ok are there any other good books out there abt cptsd recovery that arent written by pete walker

[dietpillsanddietcoke]

Incarnation

Is the Devil incarnate in me?

Is this urgency to Die the Devil working in my mind,

or is it God's answer to the pain

I’ve tried so long not to claim?

Is the Devil incarnate in me?

perhaps this affliction 

is the deep-seeded conviction

that nothing can unremember 

unless I unremember me.

Is the Devil incarnate inside?

Has he evicted God from the caverns of my mind?

warped my hopes into ashes

let a plague run rampant

till I’m left with nothing and no options

except to kill the hurt with fire.

But if I disintegrate the pain

will I crumble under the shame?

of asking

how?

And asking

why?

did I ever end up this insane?

Is there a light in this Darkness

or has he made in me his home?

how can I demolish the Devil

without also taking my own?

Can a child of God be used as a pawn 

in this war I'm not sure can even be won?

is the Devil incarnate in me? 

do I live unalive 

or try to surmise

how to make what’s done be Undone 

and take leave?

have I fostered this Insanity?

welcomed the disease with open arms?

after one too many breakdowns

it's hard to prove the Devil wrong.

"choose happy,"

"cheer up,"

"you can pray this away,"

(but will God even answer after how far I've strayed?)

the pastors say "yes"

and the priests say "confess"

I ask what Guilt to divulge 

when the done that's been done

was done when they did it to me?

is He truly incarnate inside?

people say I used to have beautiful eyes.

Now they're vast void and broken,

like the Devil, they've spoken.

Do I have what it takes to survive?

Does this Devil know what he's done?

created in me this pull that's impossible to shun?

breathed Death into spaces 

I used to hold vacant

hoping only for God and his son.

But what Holiness would encroach

into the wasted space beyond reproach?

What God would even try

in me to find

a single spot that’s not ticking time

expectant to die?

why would God seek a way

when I'm unwilling to pay?

Releasing the Devil, I fear

means staying alive’s a lot less clear

He’s scary, it’s true. 

I know that. It’s true. 

But what’s even more frightening is imagining

life wholly new.

See I’ve lived for years wanting only to die

Have these emphatic thoughts all along been Devil’s lies?

After years of our waltz

Of the Him pointing out faults

His taunts ceased to sting

And instead transformed into an Offering.

Because if I believe him first,

Then no one else could say worse.

And that’s a Devil that’s comfortable for me. 

But why should I stay?

So goes the refrain

To hear more from a God who proudly claims

Of floods

And famines

And wretched father-son-games?

No. I said no!

I don’t want to know

Don’t want to sow

The seeds of Sacred Silence, and so

Keep out, Holy One!

I seek no comfort in your show.

Your platitudes and play

Are not enough to make me stay.

For I’d rather die with the Devil 

Than lay false claim in your name.

[randomfoggytiger]

Hello!

I realized I'd gotten some research wrong here; so, I jumped back in and re-edited Mulder's Secondary Response section.

If you don't want to reread everything, I took a bit out for quick (if not thorough) reading~

Secondary Trauma Responses develop when circumstances are so extreme that a person's initial trauma response is not removing them from danger fast enough; and they then develop a second polar opposite response in the hopes that this will help. More often than not, it simply becomes a ping-pong whiplash between one extreme to the other. The four Hybrids are Fight-Fawn, Fight-Freeze, and Flight-Freeze. In Mulder's case, if he stays frozen for too long he will very quickly become very dead; thus, Mulder developed a secondary response: Flight.

Freeze-Flight (or Flight-Freeze-- potato, potatoh) Types

Below is an excerpt from Pete Walker, but it's so completely Mulder that I have nothing else to add:

"The Flight-Freeze Type is the least relational, most schizoid hybrid. He prefers the safety of "do it yourself" isolationism. The Fight-Fleeze Type avoids potential relationship traumatization with an obsessive-compulsive dissociative two-step. Step One is working to complete exhaustion. Step Two is collapsing into extreme vegging out and waiting until his energy reaccumulates enough to relaunch into Step One. The price for this time of no-longer-necessary safety is a severely narrowed existence."

(**Note for the below paragraph: the author is not talking about alpha/beta in the current, dilapidated vernacular. Think of it as an academic term describing more aggressive or assertive behavior as compared to more passive or dismissive behavior.)

"The Flight-Freeze cul-de-sac is more common among men, especially those traumatized for being vulnerable in childhood. This then drives them to seek safety in isolation, or "intimacy lite" relationships. Some non-alpha type male survivors combine their flight-freeze defenses to become stereotypical technology nerds. Telecommuting is, of course, their preferred modes.

Flight-Freeze Types are the computer addicts who focus on work long periods of time and then drift off dissociatively into computer games, substance abuse, or sleep binging. Flight-Freeze Types are prone to becoming porn addicts: when in Flight mode, they obsessively surf the net for phantom partners and engage in compulsive masturbation. When in Freeze mode, they drift off into Right-Brain sexual fantasy world if pornography is unavailable. Moreover, if they are an intimacy-light relationship, they typically engage more in with their idealized fantasy partners than with their actual partner during real-time sexual interactions."

An interesting note: these types are often misdiagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, which explains why some fans theorize that an Oxford graduate-FBI field agent might be on the spectrum (Mulder, it turns out, is just showing symptoms of his inability to cope with trauma healthily at all.)

Thank you for reading~!

Updated! X-Files Mulder Trauma Responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Fawn?

I've seen various takes on Mulder's and Scully's trauma and stress responses; and I wanted to autopsy the issue carefully to reach a conclusion. We're focusing solely on Mulder here-- but! Scully will get her own post in future.

Kitsunegari Sums Up Mulder's Trauma Responses in One Scene

Mulder is too late to stop "Scully" from pulling the trigger against her temple, screaming in agony as she drops to the ground, "dead."

He then cycles through all of his First and Secondary Trauma Responses (will be discussed below):

Running up in horror, then plastering a smile in sickening denial--

Mulder attempts to feel a pulse. There is none. Scully is dead.

His grief overwhelms him-- an aggravated and more violent (if shorter) version of his sorrow in Redux II-- scrabbling at her scalp and shoulders, silently screaming into her face, before turning away so as not to vomit.

He mentally starts to drift;

but denial-- denial, denial, denial-- holds sway as he pops his head back up, reenergized,

vainly feeling for a pulse once again, eyes desperately and obsessively focused on his partner.

There is no hope.

Mulder is now losing all control, probably gearing up to an epic meltdown of Biblical proportions-- heavy breathing, desperate eyes, nothing to grasp at or solve or hold onto--

when he hears a noise. A reprieve. A focus. An enemy.

Furious, he snatches a gun and levels it at Linda Bowman, spitting in his fury

...but doesn't fire.

And allows "Bowman" to talk him down.

And further, when "Linda" fires, Mulder flinches, puts his gun up as he dissociates (looks down to his mid-left)-- freezes, if you will-- and doesn't fight back, expecting to die.

This is Mulder's Trauma Responses in full: Freeze-Fight.

He will also begin to repeat this cycle in Milagro (if shorter-- because Scully pops up, alive, sooner.)

Why Mulder Is Primarily a Freeze Type

I'm going to include this entire segment from Pete Walker's Complex CPTSD: From Surviving to Thriving (see notes at the bottom for more info) because it's such a powerful piece of Mulder-psyche that it should stand on its own:

"A Freeze Response is triggered when a person, realizing resistance is futile, gives up, numbs out into dissociation, and/or collapses, as if accepting the inevitability of being hurt.... The Freeze Response, also known as the Camouflage Response, also triggers a survivor into hiding, isolating, and avoiding human contact.

The Freeze Type can be so frozen in the retreat mode that is seems as if their "Starter" button is stuck in the "off" position.

Off all the four Fs, Freeze Types seem to have the deepest and conscious belief that 'people' and 'danger' are synonymous.

While all 4 F Types commonly suffer from social anxiety as well, Freeze Types typically take a great deal more refuge in solitude.

Some Freeze Types completely give up on relating to others and become extremely isolated. Outside of fantasy, many also give up entirely on the possibility of love."

These Types have learned from a young age that fighting back will only get you punished and that fleeing will only get you reprimanded; so, they collapse inwardly instead. Dissociation becomes the name of the game, coasting through life without being attached to it, accepting its blows and distracting themselves from reality with either fantasy or the pursuit of a fantastical idea they want to achieve.

Frank Spotnitz said it best when he reflected on Mulder's character growth and seeking 'The Truth': ""You can't get the truth. You can't. There's a larger truth, though: that you can't harness the forces of the cosmos, but you may find somebody else. You may find another human being. That may be kind of corny and all of that, but that's really it: Love is the only truth we can hope to know, as human beings. That's what Mulder and Scully found after nine years. And that's a lot."

But what about those moments when Mulder runs at danger, demanding answers and yelling down the sky?

**Edit: This is the section i had to refurbish based on proper research.**

Secondary Trauma Responses develop when circumstances are so extreme that a person's initial trauma response is not removing them from danger fast enough; and they then develop a second polar opposite response in the hopes that this will help. More often than not, it simply becomes a ping-pong whiplash between one extreme to the other. The four Hybrids are Fight-Fawn, Fight-Freeze, and Flight-Freeze. In Mulder's case, if he stays frozen for too long he will very quickly become very dead; thus, Mulder developed a secondary response: Flight.

Freeze-Flight (or Flight-Freeze-- potato, potatoh) Types

Below is an excerpt from Pete Walker, but it's so completely Mulder that I have nothing else to add:

"The Flight-Freeze Type is the least relational, most schizoid hybrid. He prefers the safety of "do it yourself" isolationism. The Fight-Fleeze Type avoids potential relationship traumatization with an obsessive-compulsive dissociative two-step. Step One is working to complete exhaustion. Step Two is collapsing into extreme vegging out and waiting until his energy reaccumulates enough to relaunch into Step One. The price for this time of no-longer-necessary safety is a severely narrowed existence."

(**Note for the below paragraph: the author is not talking about alpha/beta in the current, dilapidated vernacular. Think of it as an academic term describing more aggressive or assertive behavior as compared to more passive or dismissive behavior.)

"The Flight-Freeze cul-de-sac is more common among men, especially those traumatized for being vulnerable in childhood. This then drives them to seek safety in isolation, or "intimacy lite" relationships. Some non-alpha type male survivors combine their flight-freeze defenses to become stereotypical technology nerds. Telecommuting is, of course, their preferred modes.

Flight-Freeze Types are the computer addicts who focus on work long periods of time and then drift off dissociatively into computer games, substance abuse, or sleep binging. FF Types are prone to becoming porn addicts: when in Flight mode, they obsessively surf the net for phantom partners and engage in compulsive masturbation. When in Freeze mode, they drift off into Right-Brain sexual fantasy world if pornography is unavailable. Moreover, if they are an intimacy-light relationship, they typically engage more in with their idealized fantasy partners than with their actual partner during real-time sexual interactions."

An interesting note: these types are often misdiagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, which explains why some fans theorize that an Oxford graduate-FBI field agent might be on the spectrum (Mulder isn't: it's a symptom of him coping very, VERY badly.)

Mulder's Freeze-Flight response kicked in sometime after his sister's abduction, since his primary Freeze response "prevented" him from saving her (even if he couldn't do anything to help.)

Since then, Mulder has buried all trauma or deep emotion in the bowels of his work in the basement, printing them out as X-Files to brand his work as his life.

For all of Mulder's talk about disliking others for dismissing something that cannot be explained, labeled, or categorized, when he can't do it himself, he goes berserk: first freezing, horrified, before he launches with righteous fury into his work, demanding answers and running himself ragged.

A potent demonstration of Mulder's yo-yo-ing Freeze-Flight Response is the Russian Roulette showdown in Pusher: Mulder more readily accepts his own death than Scully, terrified but determinedly compliant... until she becomes the next target of Modell's mind games.

It's a pattern that has already been established since her abduction, and which repeats for her cancer (and every perilous moment after and in-between.)

An important

There are countless examples where Mulder disconnects from reality in the face of great grief, ala his father's death, CSM and Diana Fowley's oily plan in One Son, and-- especially-- his mother's suicide.

In all these instances, Mulder immediately ran into work mode, trying move the world by force and come up with an explanation-- any-- to make everything right. When he is forced to sit and deal with tragic loss, his Flight peters out, leading him back to square one: an unhealthy Freeze Response.

Luckily for him, Scully is a stable, reliable support; and coaxes him into properly grieving by not sugarcoating the Truth, thereby helping him turn into healthier coping mechanisms (if he wants to use them-- he doesn't in Paper Hearts, but he does in Sein und Zeit. Baby steps.)

In short: Mulder is a Freeze-then-Flight man.

Why Mulder Isn't a Fight, Flight, or Fawn Type

To make quick work of this, I'll rely mainly on Pete Walker quotes again and add my commentary after his statements:

"A Fight [Trauma] Response is triggered when a person suddenly responds aggressively to something threatening.... Fight Types are unconsciously driven by the belief that power and control can create safety, assuage abandonment, and secure love." Extreme Fight Types often become bullies or narcissists to their loved ones as well as their enemies if left unchecked. They are demanding, demeaning, and punishing, equating strength as exerted power over someone weaker. They usually grew up in homes where they had to fight back against physical abuse or protect others from it. This translates to a bitter outlook on the world, always suspicioning the motives of others in cruel or judgmental ways.

(Note: Not much of the above is directly related to Bill Scully-- or Bill Mulder, even, see my previous post about him here-- but his natural bent is Fight above the other 3 F Types. Doesn't mean he's a bully or a narcissist; just that those would be his extremes.)

As we have seen through the entire series, Mulder as an atypical American masculine archetype: he does not resort to violence, preferring to save victims and even villains, willing to give everyone a second chance (and, by extension, giving backstabbers a clear target for their next strike.) The only time he has exerted violence over another was as a last possible extreme to stop a threat (shooting Modell, shooting the Peacock brothers, shooting Schnauz, shooting Roche, etc.)

Back to Walker:

"A Flight Response is triggered when a person responds to a perceived threat by fleeing; or, symbolically, by launching into hyperactivity. .... Extreme Flight Types are like machines with a switch stuck in the 'on' position. They are obsessively and compulsively driven by the unconscious belief that perfection will make them safe and loveable. They rush to achieve. They rush as much in thought in action, compulsion."

I will be talking about this response a little bit more in a follow-up post; but the core with this character is their ability to distract themselves from their problems into oblivion. Mulder's pains and sorrows and traumas are a constant of his life, eating away at his heart and shoving themselves in his face every day. The difference between his obsessive work ethic and a Flight Type's work ethic is the motivator: he is dabbling in his fantasy, building empires from ideas and discovering new kingdoms with every possibility; while Flight Types have ceased to function at all, robotically going from task to task until they overload or shut down.

And, lastly, back to Walker for the Fawn Trauma Response:

"Fawn Response is triggered when a person responds to threat by trying to be pleasing or helpful in order to appease and forestall an attacker.... Fawn types seek safety by merging with the wishes, needs, and demands of others. They act as if they believe that the price of admission to any relationship is the forfeiture of all their needs, rights, preferences, and boundaries. The disenfranchisement of the Fawn Type begins in childhood... learns early that a modicum of safety and attachment can be gained by becoming the helpful and compliant servant of... exploitive parents." (As an aside, this Type is also formed from having at least one narcissistic parent.)

While Mulder is often used by those around him, he never loses the core of who he is to their abuse: when Phoebe comes knocking, he may set aside the case to (try to) get some hotel action; but he's still self-aware of his and her actions, disentangled enough to self-deprecatingly (and knowingly) smirk when he catches her red-handed with another man. When his father or mother weave in and out of his life with their soft or outspoken demands, he doesn't bend from the Truth, risking his relationships continually for It. He is willing to tell Scully to her face she is lying to him; and he is willing to sacrifice what new closeness they've achieved if he believes she's being purposefully blind or obtuse. Mulder, while reliant on Scully as his human credential, is not co-dependent on her: he can stand on his own two feet, even if she were to walk out of his life. The wounds would go deep; but he would dissociate from life (like he had in Little Green Men) not erode away completely.

(As an aside, that's why probably why Mulder would have committed suicide in Gethsemane but not during the Break Up Years TM. Post IWTB Scully, while she had walked away from their life together, was still a part of his reality; whereas, S4 Scully would have been dead, deceased, gone from existence... and Mulder could never escape that, no matter how much he dissociated from it.)

How Mulder Can Use His Freeze Response Healthy

In a nutshell, a person should work through their traumas so they can pick among the 4 Trauma Responses for the healthiest outcome in each situation: Fight for healthy boundaries, Flight for healthy retreat and perseverance, Freeze for healthy awareness and distanced assessment, and Fawn for healthy assertive listening and peacemaking. Unhealthy childhoods create fixations on one of these four; and it takes a while to learn the patterns and triggers in one's life and how to manage them.

For Mulder, he grew exponentially through the years, becoming less detached and more engaged with "life on this planet" (growing from a sarcastic S1 recluse to a more emotionally honest person in S2 to a more openly supportive person in S3 to a transformed heart-on-his-sleeve man in S4-5 to someone who can find joy in S6 and peace in S7 and recreation in S8. Is there canon after that?) So, as it stands, he's doing just fine. Because if one truly searches for the Truth it might not be aliens: it might just be a whole, happy life and how to enjoy it.

And there you have it, folks!

Scully will get her own follow up, soonish (though if you don't want to wait that long, she's a pretty obvious *spoiler* Flight Type. No one's really surprised because of what happened in Fight the Future.)

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

*Note*: There are four main trauma Responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn (taken from the book Complex CPTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker-- see Disclaimers section below for info.) In short: Fight Types responds to stress by physical intimidation or verbal bullying; Flight Types run as far as they can from danger or distract themselves from it as much as possible; Freeze Types disassociate, seeing fight and flight as futile and becoming numb to life; Fawn Types try to win favor from their oppressor, leaning co-dependently on others.

**Note**: Most of the information was obtained from Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker, a private counselor and lecturer for thirty-five years. As a victim of CPTSD himself, he made a study of its victims and helped craft a system for CPTSD recoverees to understand themselves and progressively heal. (Highly recommend his book-- excellent.)

***Note***: I will ghost edit later. Brb.

[katimorton]

We've heard of fight, flight, freeze, but what about the 4th fawn or fawning? In this video I'll talk through what fawning is, what it looks like, 7 signs fawning is hurting your relationships and then how to best support ourselves if we fawn or struggle with fawning. Fawning is a type of stress response that may be common if someone is experiencing any type of PTSD that may come from a various degree of childhood or adult situations like emotional neglect. And there are many signs or symptoms of PTSD and it may not look exactly like fawning; however, fight, flight, freeze and fawn are common stress responses if someone has experienced trauma situations that are left not dealt with. Let's dive into the 7 signs fawning is hurting your relationships and how to heal from this. Do you fawn? What has your experience been like?

[acldwash]

[eyestrain-addict]

Iwtv s2 ep 2 spoilers / mini meta

Since I haven't seen anyone mention it yet, the scene where louis was discussing Lestats will and testament with Daniel, he seems to begin having an anxiety attack, that's why he lashes out at Daniel.

I thought it was pretty obvious, but also I suffer with anxiety and have aggressive responses, so maybe not everyone knows this.

[determinedwriter]

Prompt Idea: Fight or Flight Responses:

One shots based on the fight or flight responses:

Fight: character fights back or lashes out in response to an attack or trauma and it’s aftermath.

Flight: character avoids situations reminiscent of trauma or refuses to acknowledge or process it, fleeing in response to conflict.

Freeze: character freezes up when confronted, shutting down at the first sign of trouble, unable to move or act. Similar reactions occur when trauma resurfaces.

Fawn: much like a fawn chased by a predator, the character knows/feels they are doomed and gives up entirely, at the mercy of their assailant and/or trauma.

Talked about these responses with my therapist today and had to turn it into whump lol. Feel like it has some potential for stories and one shots and stuff. Tag me if you want if you use this format but you don’t have to. Would just love to see what people come up with!