#Tiny box cell

[themegachessatron]

A Review of my time in Skyrim's Prisons (Featuring some followers): The Bloodworks

This is chapter seven of my ongoing series to explore and review the prison facilities of each of Skyrim's major cities. In this part we find ourselves in Windhelm, centre point of the Stormcloak Rebellion, looking at a prison with an... unclear naming convention. The prison itself is located inside the Palace of the Kings, in the guard barracks loading zone, so what do I call it? Well, I've decided to refer to the facility in this review by the name affectionately given to it by the people of Windhelm, The Bloodworks. This name interestingly derives from when it acted as a place to contain pit fighters while the Windhelm Arena was in use, but I prefer to think of it as a potential reference to the harshness and brutality of the prison in question, showing clearly that this prison has a very violent and disciplined policy. Does it live up to these ideals? Let's see...

I arrive in the cell provided for my group and immediately the problem is obvious. That's it. That is ALL the floorspace there is. Prisoners are afforded a small pile of hay to sleep on and nothing else. This is by far the most brutal and unforgiving treatment in any prison reviewed so far and shows the Windhelm guard are more than prepared to back up their aggressive attitude to criminals with action, especially when they decide to throw four people into the same tiny cell. Our group had been arrested this time as a result of an altercation in the city streets over the very apparent racial prejudice in the city wherein Sofia in all the madness may or may not have taken the life of one of the market stall runners. In order to both keep an eye on us all easier and further punish us for our crimes the guards had decided to throw most of us into the same cell (Teldryn and Jordan lucked out and got a separate cell nearby). This was not only deeply uncomfortable for everyone involved but also, in Inigo's case, very distressing. After a short while Inigo's tolerance had run out and in a panicked state he forced the door open with his bare hands! Naturally the guards were not best pleased with this.

So next thing I know we're in a firefight. My group had felt the red mist descend and were quite evidently sick of Windhelm's shit, which truth be told I can't blame them that much. A massive melee broke out with spells, arrows and swords flying in every which direction, blood coating the floors in the closest thing to a carpet the prison area will likely ever see. I had wanted to keep this review tasteful but clearly I was in the minority, so senseless violence won the day (hooray) and much commotion was felt during my tour of the facility (not hooray).

Most of the initial combat took place in the holding area. A cold, dirty, cruel place where torture equipment was laid out liberally across the room and indications of past struggles and sufferings were commonplace. Clearly the Stormcloaks preferred getting their justice the hard way, and they were more than well equipped to do so. Everything in this room, from the cell's tiny empty space to the vicious devices being used here perfectly complement the brutal, no-nonsense nature of this facility. It felt more like a vampire den than a city jail, for both better and worse.

While I was examining the fascinating torture devices, my friends had forced the guards into a chokehold at the foot of the stairs leading up to the barracks and ,quite simply, they filled up the booking list for Sovengarde completely in a matter of seconds. Now I understand that my clique is very well-versed in the potent cocktail of combat and "fucking shit up" but even then these guards were very quickly defeated and massacred. Though I suppose it's on brand for the Windhelm guards to talk big but be sent off to Shor's penthouse faster than a very ambitious Alduin who wants to get the whole world-eating thing done and over with quickly. If nothing else, I suppose bloodied walls and floors is expected in this prison, just not from the guards.

An unexpected upside to the aforementioned slaughter is that it allowed me to examine the guard barracks fully without any interruptions, seeing as the entirety of the barracks' occupants were currently twitching downstairs in pools of their collective blood. The barracks in question were rather nice. Comfortable décor, plenty of bedding, effective and functional furniture, the works. It stands in stark contrast to the bloody (not intentionally) cesspit downstairs and shows that these guards were being well cared for by their superiors but unfortunately not well trained as the large pile of bodies just downstairs is proof of.

Also included in these barracks, tucked away in the corner right of the exit down to the cesspit are the evidence and prisoner belongings chests. This is a strong storage location. Any prospective convicts would have to go through the cesspit in its entirety and enter the barracks where the guards are stationed (even if that is a moot point now) to access the chests and retrieve their beloved scroll of conjure storm atronach or whatever it is they use to fight off racists in this part of the country.

The corridor out of the guards barracks was woefully uneventful (I can't for the life of me imagine why), with it leading to a door into the Palace of the Kings proper, which ended up being easier to escape from than I'd anticipated. The good thing about having a lot of dead Windhelm guards nearby is that there was plenty of disguises to go around. We were almost caught again when Inigo's tail accidentally came loose near the front door, but we managed to convince the real guards that it was just a very long, thin bear pelt before leaving.

In conclusion, The Bloodworks were brilliant for what they wanted to achieve, which unfortunately for their review score wasn't a decent prison. The Bloodworks might just be the best torture dungeon I've ever seen, but it is highly insufficient as a city prison and the guards were... well, you saw what happened to them.

Final score: One Scroll of Conjure Storm Atronach out of Ten Scrolls of Conjure Storm Atronach

Thank you for reading this review. Next time we look north to see if we can brave the cold of The Chill in Winterhold.

[flowercrowngods]

tried to get nice things for myself. 1 dead 3 injured

[bleue-flora]

Been thinking about this again. About c!Sapnap wearing the mask and taunting c!Dream, knowing it’s importance. For someone who believes c!Dream doesn’t have any attachments and doesn’t care about him, he sure does take a lot of effort to take something for no other reason than c!Dream’s attachment to it. Because it’s not like he needed the armor, he already had some. If c!Dream truly doesn’t have attachments then it doesn’t matter what armor and mask he wears to terrorize the server. C!Sapnap just didn’t want to give him back what belonged to him, what he longed for - a piece of himself, his persona, his mask.

And I keep thinking about c!Tubbo and c!Tommy in theory wearing c!Dream’s armor in the disc finale - wearing the mask. And the utter disrespect that comes with, but also how powerful they must have felt wearing the face of the monster that haunted their dreams.

So, if in the finale c!Dream’s helmet, that he takes off for c!Tommy, represents his mask, does that mean that when c!Sapnap puts on c!Dream’s armor, Nightmare, he is putting on and stealing c!Dream’s mask? - Because I’m not gonna lie that really puts a new perspective on that betrayal… Furthermore, when c!Techno brings c!Dream armor in prison, did he make him a mask and bring it to him… and then take away the mask later? - If so, again that’s kinda screwed up. Though you could argue that perhaps he made c!Dream a mask for the jailbreak so he had one to face the server with and then because they were trying to not seem like allies he took it back, knowing that c!Dream would get another one. Which also begs the question, did c!Punz make c!Dream a mask for after prison or is he simply handing over one of c!Dream’s masks?… When c!Tommy in the minecart skirmish stole c!Dream’s armor, was he taunting him with his own mask? - Because oof that’s some serious violation and disrespect…

In other words, if you think that c!Dream’s helmet in the finale represents the mask (which I’d say is implied by c!Tommy) does that same logic apply across the board or is it just for that moment? And if it does apply to rest of the lore, wow does that have some implications…

[foone]

There's a gaylord half full of old cell phones. I reach inside and pull one out, and in doing so I accidentally touch the side. For the first time in a decade and a half, it powers on.

It's alive, despite everything. It's got half battery. The background is still set to a selfie on the tiny one megapixel camera. I'm surprised, and hold down the power button. It shows "shutting down", and the screen goes blank, for probably the final time. I drop it back into the box, and it clatters as it hits the pile of iphones with shattered screens and flipphones from the 2000s. There's silence in the ewaste depot again, as the power-down chime fades away.

[jjenthusee]

Safe House

Pairing: Red Hood x Reader

A/N: I love the idea of being afraid of Red Hood, but at the same time sharing only one brain cell with him lol ENJOY :) comment, reblog, and like if u can <3

check out pt. 2 here!

Summary: The Red Hood took you back to his safe house, as a hostage? a witness? Doesn’t matter when you can’t help but snoop around the vigilante’s safe house.

Tags: unhinged Jason, annoying that muscular man would be my love language, chaotic duo, banter, another part if u all want one??

Word Count: 706

If someone told you that you would spend your evening sweeping the floor of Red Hood’s safe house, you would not be expecting to be ten dollars richer, but you stood there, diligently sweeping the entire box of loose-leaf tea that you accidentally dropped while snooping around.

Dark tea was scattered across the old, but clean floorboards. You grimaced at the thought of tiny tea leaves permanently stuck in the crevices of the wooden floor.

You figured that when you are a leading crime lord, you constantly deal with too many unknown bodily fluids and pick up a few award-winning cleaning habits.

What’s worse is that you clumsily dirtied that leading crime lord’s current home.

“I’m so dead.” You stared wide eyed at the mess you created.

After sweeping together a neat pile, you went back to the small storage closet you found to grab the dustpan. It paid off to snoop because you found Red Hood’s broom and hopefully could clean everything before he came back.

All his supplies were neatly arranged with a proper place for all of his cleaning products. Broom and mop hung on the wall, shelves organized by the type of disinfectant, towels and rags neatly folded.

It was scarily neat.

“Maybe I can offer a lifelong employment as a maid?” You somberly laughed to yourself, almost in a craze that you were on the verge of panicking and laughing hysterically.

As you murmured to yourself, you spotted some sprinkles of tea that escaped you.

“I just don’t want a bullet hole between my eyes.” You sighed.

You located the dustpan hanging where you grabbed the broom earlier, intentionally avoiding eye contact with the gun mounted to the edge of the shelf with the disinfectant sprays.

“I’m so screwed.” You told yourself.

“Yeah you are.” A voice boomed behind you.

You threw the dustpan in your hand at the direction of the voice, in your frightened state you didn’t even bother aiming and the plastic dustpan flew past Red Hood’s side.

You stepped back into the closet as you panicked, hearing numerous bottles fall behind you. One by one crashing into another as a final bottle rolled to your shoe.

Your face scrunched at the clear mess you couldn’t see but heard.

“Red! Hey, oh wow, you’re back. I missed you, really, I stayed just like you said—“

“I said to stay over there.” He lazily nodded in the direction of a lonely wooden chair in the corner facing the wall.

“Are you kidding me? I look like I’m a toddler in time out if I sit over there.” You were in disbelief.

“You are.” He looked at the mess you made behind you and the small pieces of tea still spread out on the floor.

A modulated sigh voiced out his helmet.

You were so dead.

“Move.” Red nudged you aside, making his way to the doorway of the storage closet. “How did you make such a mess?”

You saw him bend down, picking up bottles and reorganizing the messy shelves. You curiously looked over his shoulder when you noticed he stopped, he reached for something out of your view.

You froze, remembering the mounted gun.

Your heart started to race as your eyes nervously glanced his way. Then, like you were in slow motion, you watched Red slowly stand up, towering over you as you could only watch the back of his shoulders straighten.

He turned, so slowly you wanted to scream.

“Don’t shoot me!” You yelled, covering your hands over your head in a lame attempt to somehow protect yourself from a bullet.

“You idiot, I’m giving you a dust brush!” Red held out the brush in his hand, no weapon in sight.

“Oh.” You moved your hands back down.

“Now sweep up the shit you spilled. You threw the dustpan earlier so find it.” Red spoke in annoyance.

“Dammit.” You sighed.

“Do I need to remind you that this is your mess?”

“Fine, fine. Don’t get your helmet in a twist.” You grabbed the dust brush, trying not to give the Red Hood one last side eye. You failed. “Stupid tin can.”

“I don’t hear you cleaning!” Jason yelled over his shoulder.

“Alright, alright. I’m going.”

[azrielbrainrot]

Haunted

Pairing: Azriel x F!Reader

Kinktober 2024: Prey/Predator

Description: You and Azriel play a not so innocent game of hide-and-seek.

Warnings: Smut, vaginal sex, rough sex, sex in the dungeons, bit of fingering, dirty talk, bit of cum play, slight (almost non existant) dom/sub dynamics, tiny bit of degradation and a praise kink

Word Count: ~2,1k

Rating: 18+ MDNI

Kinktober 2024 Masterlist

The silence was deafening in between the stone walls, making you far too aware of the sound of your own breathing and how hard your heart was beating. You wouldn't be surprised if he could hear it through your chest even if he was on the opposite side of the dungeons, it was certainly loud enough in your ears.

Moving was difficult as well since you were terrified of alerting him with every step you took, making you move even slower than probably necessary. Not to mention the darkness that set in the dungeon, the moonlight filtering through the small windows not nearly enough to allow you to see even the end of the hallway.

Azriel's dungeon wasn't entirely unknown to you, having been here on multiple occasions for work or even to come find him when he got too immersed in his duties, but you definitely should have prepared better before asking him to hunt you here. It should have been the least you could do after daring the Spymaster of the Night Court to a game of hide-and-seek.

“I have to say I'm impressed, princess,” his deep voice calls out, making you freeze, heart dropping onto your stomach. It takes you entirely too long to realize his voice sounds far away enough, echoing through the walls. “Seasoned assassins haven't managed to hold out this long.”

When the shock dies down a bit and you regain control of your body once again, you keep walking down the hallway slowly, carefully setting one foot in front of the other. As far as he sounded just now, you knew he could walk through these walls effortlessly without making noise and if you stood in the same place, he would catch you before you'd even get the chance to run.

The sound of his knuckles knocking against the wall as he walks makes you jump out of your skin again, and you almost want to curse out at him, knowing he's having entirely too much fun while you sit close to a heart attack.

“Maybe I should have you work for me. You could still be a great spy.”

The relaxed tone of his voice only worsens your nerves. It also annoys you, which you know is his objective, but you won't give him the satisfaction of making a wrong move just so he could find you more easily. You had brought up this game with a clear view of the end, but now your competitiveness wouldn't allow you to simply give up. The reward would be far more delicious if you gave him a good fight too.

Making your way to one of the open cells at the end of the hallway and getting inside, you look for a place to hide. Every cell had been emptied and cleaned before you came, you really wouldn't have expected anything less from Azriel, even during this dirty game of yours he wanted to keep you protected and sheltered.

The room was mostly empty save for a table by the iron bars, a chair and chains on the furthest wall and a box sitting by the side wall. It was full of cleaning supplies by the smell of it which would be perfect since it could mask your scent as well. You quickly duck behind it, sitting on the floor and making yourself as small as you can so you're not visible at all behind it.

A shadow moving in the corner catches your attention, startling you for a second, but with a harsh glare at it you manage to send it away. Azriel had promised not to use them - if he did the game would be over in seconds. His shadows had a tendency to cling to you though, since they were extensions of him and acted on his feelings, so even if they didn't run to tattle on you, seeing them gathering around the box would be like an arrow pointing in your direction.

“How long do you plan on hiding for, my love?” His voice was a lot closer now, it sounded like he was walking down this same hallway. Covering your mouth with your hand, you do your best to calm your heart and not make any noise at all, trying to remember the breathing exercises he taught you. “We both know how this will end.”

Counting down the steps in your mind, you peek out slowly when you're convinced enough time has passed for him to be around the opposite corner of the dungeon. You find the hallway empty and take the moment to start walking in the direction he came from, maybe find another place to hide back there if you're lucky.

“Caught you,” a voice whispers directly in your ear, making you jump and attempt to move away only to be held by your waist against a familiar leather clad chest. Your heart was racing, the sound so loud in your ears that it takes you a moment to remind your body that you weren't actually in danger.

Azriel simply leans into your neck, breathing in your scent, humming into your skin when your body starts relaxing against his. His shadows start crawling up your body as well, happily moving around the two of you after being denied your touch for so long.

“You said you wouldn't use them,” you whisper, scared your voice would give out on you. Fear had fully transformed into desire, the whiplash of emotions and adrenaline running through your veins threatening to make you lose your mind.

“I didn't,” he murmurs, biting into your skin, “I'm a little offended that you think so little of my abilities.” You didn't, not at all, but your next words turn into a moan as he licks at the bite mark. “Now, be good and let me enjoy my prize.”

When his hands reach to the hem of the short dress you wore for the occasion and pulls it off in one swift movement, you thought he would turn you around and finally kiss you, maybe lift you up into his arms and fuck you against the wall, but instead he guides you back to the cell you had been hiding in, letting you know that he had simply been indulging you for a bit longer when he walked away, and bends you over the table you had been eyeing earlier, the cold surface coming in contact with your overheated skin sending goosebumps all over your body.

You can't see him in this position, can't see the appreciation in his eyes as the hazel rakes over your body, or the sick desire when he spreads your legs and finds your underwear soaked through. His thumb delves under your underwear without warning, running it over your folds before tugging at the fabric once, giving you time to stop him if you wanted to, and then tugging harder a second time when you didn't, ripping it clean off your body.

Two of his fingers are inside you before you have a chance to prepare yourself, finding no resistance whatsoever as your cunt greedily sucks them in. Azriel chuckles, a dark sound that makes your toes curl.

“Don't tell me you got this wet running from me,” he muses, fucking his fingers into you faster, “Were you thinking of what I would do when I caught you? Did you imagine me fucking you over this table like this?” The obscenely loud moan you let out is the only answer he needs. “Such a dirty girl, so perfect for me.”

His fingers leave you entirely too soon, prompting a whine of protest out of you, one that gets silenced quickly when he gently kicks your feet apart as you hear him unbuckling the leathers you had specifically asked him to wear. You don't even have time to beg before he enters you in one smooth motion, setting up a punishing pace that has you holding onto the cell bars in front of you.

His hands were gripping onto your hips hard enough to bruise, bringing your body to meet his thrusts. Your moans were echoing around the empty dungeon, leaving your mouth unattended as you got lost in the pleasure, and if it weren't for the spell cast around it to make it soundproof, you would be waking up everyone around.

The feeling of his leathers hitting your naked skin was turning you on more than it should, but seeing him in his Spymaster attire while chasing you around his dungeon could have probably made you cum without him ever laying a finger on you. The thought makes you clench around him, getting rewarded with a deep moan of his own.

Between the adrenaline of the chase and the way he was fucking you so well, you were already impossibly close, trying your best to hold back and enjoy the moment as long as you could, your cunt squeezing around him wildly - you had fantasized about this too many times for it to end so soon. It seemed he had a different idea though, his thrusts hitting all the spots he knew would make you lose control.

“Why are you holding back, my love?” His voice was clearly affected, it sounded like he was holding back himself. “Want to feel you cum on my cock. Come on, show me how good I'm making you feel.”

There really wasn't a chance of denying him even if you wanted to, he was hitting you too deep, too hard, so so good. You were cumming around his cock just like he wanted as soon as the words left his mouth, a silent scream stuck in your throat, entire form trembling against the table as your body struggled to handle the sudden amount of pleasure.

Azriel fucks you through it, his thrusts becoming more erratic and his groans echoing louder around the walls, a telltale sign of how close he truly was. But he surprises you once more, pulling out of you before you even have the chance to really come down from your high, and spins you around, dropping you on your knees. Luckily even through the haze, your body knew what to do, parting your lips and sucking his cock into your mouth just in time for him to cum down your throat, fingers tangled in your hair and head thrown back as he fucks every last drop into your mouth.

It takes him a while to pull out, and judging by the way his cock refused to truly soften, you almost thought he would keep fucking your face, but he does so gently, tucking himself back into his leathers before squating down to your level when you pout up at him, smirking at the mess he made before kissing you, licking any remnants of cum and spit that trailed down your chin.

“Think you can still stand?”

The question makes you take note of the way your muscles still spasmed, but you still nod up at him, albeit a bit confused. He could just winnow you straight to your room, no need to walk all the way back or anything.

“Alright then,” he says with a hint of pride, holding onto your waist and helping you stand, studying the way your legs wobble for a second before letting go and deeming you steady enough on your feet. It's not like he hadn't fucked you way harder before, you were almost a little offended he thought you would be out of commission so easily.

Azriel leans down to kiss you one more time, letting you indulge yourself, hand finding the back of his neck, only to pull away and take a step back, a sadistic smirk playing on his face, sending a chill down your spine.

“Now I want you to run for me again, princess.” His smirk only widens when he sees the excitement replacing the confusion on your face. “Next time I catch you, I'll chain you to the wall.”

A million thoughts run through your mind, one more filthy than the former. He nods his head to the door in encouragement. “Go on, I'll give you a headstart.”

It was going to be a long night.

[gildedoak]

Southern Comfort Food Episode 11 - Pecan Pie and Sugar Pie

FINALLY! BEELZEBUB AND ASMODEUS ARRIVE!! They. Have. So. Many. Details. *wheeeeeeze*

I personally have not had sugar pie, but it sounds delicious! From what I could gather, it's almost like a pecan pie without the pecan layer on top. If I am incorrect, those of you who HAVE had sugar pie, please hop in the comments.

SOUTHERN COMFORT FOOD SERIES Chicken and Waffles Sweet Tea Peach Cobbler Hushpuppies Crab/Crawfish Boil Gumbo (plus character notes!) Beignets (part 2) Shrimp and Grits Cornbread Biscuits and Gravy Fried Catfish ??? - Season 1 Finale

Description under the cut!

[IMAGE DESCRIPTION: King Asmodeus and Queen Beelzebub each stand holding a pecan pie and a sugar pie. Lucifer has shapeshifted into a bird with a tiny top hat, flying above Bee as he sticks his tongue out at her.

Lucifer: Nyehhh!!

Bee: Flying away won't get you outta this, Luci! WE NEED TO CHAT.

The pecan pie she's holding gets larger, with the caption "SUPERSIZE IT." Asmodeus stands beside her, though his pies are smartly packed away into labeled boxes.

Asmodeus, talking into his cell phone: Better hurry up Levi, or I'm gonna take your share home to Fizzie!

Leviathan: YOU WOULDN'T DARE! BEL, DRIVE FASTER!!

Aggressive driving sounds can be heard in the background on the other line, presumably Belphegor as she proceeds to break several traffic laws.

END DESCRIPTION]

[itwasntimethatdidit40]

The right ones.

Pic credits

Pairing: Soft!Joel Miller x reader, no outbreak (Sarah is alive and well)

Summary: Joel buys you pads. ‘Cause Joel provides, you know, no matter the situation.

Tags: established relationship, pet names (baby, honey), reader has period and hair, no other description is given, mention of period symptoms, mention of cramps, mention of pads, mention of Sarah, flirting, kissing, Joel is a sweet pookie bear, I think that’s all? It’s just some tiny little fluff I wrote because I’m about to get my period and I need some comfort 🥲

I tried to write it in a neutral way so that every person who menstruates can identify with it, I hope I succeeded. (if you think there are things that need to be changed, just tell me and I'll do it ❤️)

English is not my first language, no beta and no proofreading so any mistake is all my fault, I’m sorry 💀

Thanks to anyone who will read this!

Your cell phone rings.

“Hey! What’s up, honey?”

“Um… listen, which ones did you say you need?”

“The ones with wings, Joel. Blue box, second shelf from the bottom.”

Usually you are the one who takes care of groceries and hygiene products shopping and by now you know by heart where they are.

“Mh…” you can see him. In the middle of the aisle, frowning, one hand on his hip and the other one holding the phone, one knee slightly forward, as he tries to maneuver through the boxes, they must all look the same to him.

“The ones that say ‘night, with wings, extra long’,” you add to try to help him.

Silence follows, several deep breaths, an undertone of exasperation, you bite your lower lip to keep from bursting out laughing. You don’t want to make fun of him, he’s trying hard to make it right.

He offered to do it for you this morning while you were in the bathroom and you discovered that not only had your period decided to come early but you were also almost out of pads.

You let out a sigh and cursed, “Oh damn!” You were in a foul mood, the cramps were making you squirm, your head was hurting, your back was tormenting you.

He was getting dressed, clearly heard you and asked worried “what’s wrong?”

You walked out of the bathroom with your head down and one hand on your stomach feeling miserable “UGH, my stupid period came and I’m running out of pads”

You sat on the bed and grabbed your phone from the nightstand as a terrible nausea hit you, and you called out of work saying you were sick.

His large hand caressed your face as he leaned down to kiss you.

“I’ll go to the supermarket during lunch break,” he said softly “Stay in bed and rest, okay?”

“Thank you so much” you said, lying down on the bed again and burying your face into your pillow, feeling cramps clawing inside you “you’re the absolute best”

He leaned to kiss your cheek and then left the house to reach the construction site.

—————

He had done it for Sarah one of the first times she had her period and he had bought the wrong type, the thick and bulky ones, she had looked at the box with a downhearted expression that had made his heart sink.

“Those aren't the ones I wanted, Dad! I told you extra thin!” She screamed at him between sobs.

Joel felt like a good-for-nothing.

Making Sarah cry was terrible for him.

He later discovered that his daughter's tantrum was also a side effect of her period and Sarah had apologized to him but Joel still felt that he was the one who had to apologize for his lone wolf status that didn't allow him to have someone by his side to ask for help.

He would have liked to fall in love, yet he had to make it on his own, he certainly didn’t have time to date between work and all the other things he had to take care of. Being a single dad was a full time job.

After that, Joel had memorized the type that Sarah liked best but she had always conveniently made sure to stock up every time they went to the supermarket.

It had been many years since he had bought them for her and he found himself back at square one. Packages are so different, he could swear there are a dozen new ones he's never seen before.

He pinches his nose, takes a deep breath and then he sees it, just like you described it.

"I found them!" you hear him say enthusiastically "I'll be there soon"

"Good job! I'll be waiting for you, love" you coo.

He grabs the box and he goes to the checkout.

You hang up the phone wondering if he really has the ones you want but in any case you’re already grateful that he used his lunch break to bring them to you.

When he met you he was convinced he would be alone forever.

You had reopened his heart little by little, with patience, without pushing him to do or say what he wasn't ready for yet and he had rediscovered himself as a man capable of loving and in need of receiving it. He was grateful for this, he’s madly in love with you and wants to do everything he can to help you in every circumstance.

————————

Joel has quietly entered your room and find you asleep.

He sits on the bed trying not to wake you.

Your hair spread out on the pillow, your face relaxed, your mouth slightly agape and your hand hanging loosely next to your face… you are so beautiful he can’t believe it. He’s the luckiest man in the world and the least he can do is bring you the right damn box. He leave the bag on your nightstand, kisses you on the temple and goes to the kitchen to make some sandwiches.

You wake up after a couple of minutes and see the bag so you grab it to look inside.

Bingo.

Joel wasn’t wrong, they are exactly the ones you wanted. And you find your favorite chocolate bar in it too.

You hear him humming softly in the kitchen so you get up to go and congratulate your hero.

“Hey, gorgeous!” he says to you as soon as he sees you at the kitchen door. “How are you feeling?”

“Better.” you say, stretching your arms. Luckily the painkiller you took worked.

“I’m happy to hear that. Go back to bed, I’ll bring you a sandwich in a bit” You move closer and wrap your arms around his waist, leaning against his back as he spreads mayo on the bread.

“You don’t have to do all this, but thank you” you whisper “I love you so much” His body is warm and welcoming, you bury your face in his plaid shirt inhaling his woody scent, so familiar and seductive.

Joel is like that, he had never been good with words, his love language is gestures. And he makes tons of them, constantly, small and big. He remembers which flowers you like best, he brings you Chinese food when you tell him you had a bad day, he watches your romantic comedies with you even if they bore him, he lets you choose the music in the car even if he's old school and you're belting out Billie Eilish and Chappell Roan these days, if something in the house broke, you find it repaired the next day without even asking.

“I love you too” he says, dropping the knife on the counter and placing his hands on yours, holding you close.

“You got the right ones, I'm proud of you” you tell him softly.

He turns to kiss you “Good, I’m glad I could help”

The tip of your tongue grazes his lips and you gently make your way into his mouth, moaning against him while he fills his hands with your ass squeezing it.

“Mmm baby, don't provoke me, I don't have much time left before coming back to work unfortunately"

“We can always have a quickie, they say orgasms help with cramps, you know” you say in a slightly pleading voice, looking at his big brown beautiful eyes through your eyelashes.

“Oh well then if it's for a good cause…” he replies huskily.

“And then you deserve a prize”

“I also got you some chocolate, did you see?”

“Oh yes” you say grabbing him by the shirt and dragging him into the bedroom “I saw it and I love it, but I crave something else sweet right now”

Joel chuckles as he follows you into your shared bedroom “such a dirty little thing you are”

[evilminji]

I wanna Make Bruce "Father of Many Terrible Terrible Gremlins" Wayne... babysit Lil Baby Man.

It's... it's the fuckin Fenton Dream Catcher again, man. Danny was so certain he BURNED it. After the last... Incident(tm).

But, NO! Here he stands. Well, floats. Barbecue sauce on his ti- *cough!* He means! Be-split between two Selfs! Like... *checks watch* FUCK. Less then 25 minutes before the Big, Fancy Ass, Multi-Realm Council of Stuffy Significance Etc Etc. He can never remember the name. It's long, takes up like three pages. NOWS NOT THE TIME!

Look.

There is Responsible Him! And.... THAT.

THAT is his inner gremlin. His "but it would be FUNNY tho" impulse. The grand ol "do it for the Vine, fenton!". Commit to the bit! It has three brain cells and uses ALL of them for Cartoonish slap-gag evil. That time he super glued the screaming chicken voice box into the exhaust pipe of Vlad's mo-ped? The Oorbez? Hiding all his novelty socks under the snow to be found come spring like a bountiful Packers themed harvest?

Do not let the tiny dimwitted blep face fool you.

He is a MASTER of psychological manipulation.

And YOU, Bruce. Owe me that Favor from *sees multiple intrigued people trying to listen in* .... That Batman Thing we did. (OH COME ON!) So pay up. Watch him. Here's the Ectoplasmic Container Play Pen. The Kiddy Harness he can't phase out off. A list of contacts. And a fresh bottle of headache medication.

O7

I'd pray for you. But that would probably be condescending, given where I'm headed. So instead, I'll remember you as you were. Moderately well rested and free of my nonsense! See ya in... probably a month!

Toodles~☆

@hdgnj @hypewinter @the-witchhunter @spidori @babbling-babull @mutable-manifestation @lolottes

[poeticallyspiteful]

Hi there.

Maybe a newt x f reader where reader its a healer ( doctor) . reader was a friend of theseus and they were working on a case from the Ministry of magic. Thank you so much ❤️

kiss it better

newt scamander x reader

fluff (making out)

cw: unedited, blood, a lil bit of ~suggestiveness~/(okay a lot a bit of suggestiveness i write like a romance novelist sometimes lol sorry not sorry), making out, newt is ripped and hot as hell

summary: newt gets injured and theseus knows the perfect person to kiss it better.

notes: thank you so much for the request love!!! i wasn’t sure exactly what you were looking for with this one so i just used my imagination so i do hope you like it. feel free to request something more if you don’t though :))

16+ please!!

“theseus, this is ridiculous, let go of me.”

it was a small cut, just a little one. a small mishap with alone of his creatures, that was all. such a tiny little ailment.

“it is bleeding profusely and goes all the way across your stomach, newt!” theseus exclaimed, pulling his brothers coat sleeve like a child dragging their parents through a candy store. “she’s very nice, you know that.”

oh, newt knew you were nice— that was the problem. you were so nice, so pretty, so incredibly everything that newt could hardly bare it. years and years of friendship with you and he could hardly even contain his joy at the sound of your laugh, at the mere sight of you. it made it hard to breathe, hard to think, hard to exist when all he could focus on was you.

“you’re working a case, theseus,” newt sighed, allowing his brother to pull him up the stairs to your apartment. “she’s probably reviewing files or something, it would be rude to interrupt her work.”

but the scamander brothers were already outside your door, and theseus was already knocking. before newt could brace himself for the wave of love sickness that would inevitably hit him the second he saw you, the door swung open and there you were; nice, pretty, perfect.

“hi newt, theseus,” you greeted, chest heaving (you may have ran across the apartment the second you’d heard their voices coming down the hall) “what can i— oh merlin’s beard.”

newt looked down, unsurprised to see the blood had seeped through his white shirt. he gave you a lopsided smile and you rolled your eyes, a pitiful attempt to avoid eye contact with the boyish man before you.

“come inside.”

theseus all but shoved newt inside, already straightening out his suit and brushing the left over floo powder off of his shirt. he looked up to you and his brother, unphased by the confused look on your faces.

“well, i best be off.”

you gawked at him. “your— your not going to stay?” you asked. he shook his head. “theseus! your brother is injured and you’re leaving?”

“we have a case!”

“it’s really okay,” newt said, bashfully, suddenly reminding you of the reason they were there.

scoffing, you turned back to newt, waving your friend off. “workaholic,” you murdered as you began searching for your emergency bandage kit.

and with that, theseus shut the door— but not before sending his brother a mischievous wink. newt felt a shiver down his spine.

sneaky bastard.

you finally found the small red box, pulling it open and rifling through it for a disinfectant and some gaws, as well as a mini suture kit.

glancing up at newt through your eyelashes, you hummed expectantly. “shirt off,” you ordered, some foreign sort of confidence surging through you.

newt swore all the brain cells left his mind. “pardon?” he chocked, suddenly not too concerned with his injuries.

“i can’t exactly fix you through the shirt. now c’mon, we don’t have all day,” you explained.

quickly, newt obeyed, shedding his baggy coat and undoing the bloodied buttons. very quickly, he felt exposed, but the bashful look on your face made him feel more smug than anything.

you had never seen newt shirtless before now, but my lord, did you wish the sight to be engraved in your mind till the day you died. you could see the viens that traveled up his tanned arms, and as shocked to see his biceps had been rather toned under that jacket all this time. his freckles spanned all down his chest and arms as well, dancing around the thin scars across him.

for a man so cute and clever, he was sure an enthralling sight to see.

clearing your throat, you finally looked down at the wound intently, relieved to see it didn’t look like too hard of a fix. with some shallow sutures and cleaning, he’d be better in no time.

“not too bad,” you murmured without thinking, entire body going cold at the implication. shit. the clever smile on newts face grew. “i— i meant the cut isn’t too bad, doesn’t look, y’know, infected.”

“good,” newt agreed, leaning back on his arms. his abdomen tensed at the movement and he hissed at the pain. “ouch.”

before you could look at him too closely, or think too much apparently, you knealt down infront of him. however, as he opened his legs to allow you space between them, you realized the predicament you’d put yourself in.

holy fucking shit.

you looked up hesitantly, feeling your heart race at the way newt looked down at you; nervous and kind, like he was just as surprised by your position as you were.

“this might sting a little,” you announced, trying to redirect his (and yours) attention back to the real reason you were on your knees.

carefully, you wiped the cotton pad across the cut, cleaning up the blood around the wound. newt hissed again, hands gripping the blanket laid across your couch. you had to will yourself to keep your eyes on the wound.

“almost done,” you reassured, finally looking up to see newts eyes screwed shut in pain. quickly, you dabbed at the far end of the wound, bringing your hands down quickly. “all done.”

newt sighed in relief, swallowing roughly. he glanced down to his stomach, feeling his head buzz as you looked back up at him. “whatcha thinking, doc?” he teased.

you could’ve died at the irony. you could not tell him what you were thinking right now.

“well, it’ll only need a few stitches at the edges there on the left, but it should be fine otherwise. just some bandages and you’ll be good,” you answered.

“no magic?” he asked.

“sadly, my regulations to do these sorts of healing charms only spans as far as britain,” you replied. “i’m working on getting the papers here in the states, but for now, just my handy work.”

newt smiled, another grin which made you weak in the knees. “your handy work is quite good.”

you ignored the heat in your face from the praise as you began you sutures. you felt newt shiver under your hands as they fluttered across his stomach, tracing the stitches and looking for any imperfections. finally satisfied with the stitching, you taped some bandages across them, and stood up once you were done. three easy steps, and nothing went wrong—

as you took a step back, you stumbled over the edge of your rug, fumbling backwards as you tried to regain your balance. before you realized what had happened, you felt newts hands on the back of your thighs, pulling you forward.

and forward was onto his lap.

you had spoken too soon.

you caught yourself with a tight grip on his bare shoulders, the skin soft and hot under your hands. your face was barely an inch from his, and your eyes met his in a brief moment of panic.

“s-sorry, i just didn’t want you to hit your head on the coffee table,” newt whispered, eyes darting form your eyes to your lips and back again nervously. he seemed very regretful of his action at first, but he didn’t budge to move you off of him, hands gripping the flesh around your hips.

“t-thank you,” you stammered, gathering all your strength not to squirm in his arms, your heart beating faster than your blood could pump.

newts eyes found yours again, thumbs making small circles in your hip bone. “have i ever told you that you’re very pretty?” the low rasp of his voice could’ve made you faint on any ordinary day, but given that you were practically straddling him, nothing could’ve made you more lightheaded. “especially up so close.”

“newt,” you whispered.

“what, love?”

“please kiss me.”

newt closed the gap without a second thought, kissing you gently. his lips were soft, but needy, pulling away and coming back for more over and over and over again. his hands traveled from your hips all the way up to your head, resting on your jaw. you moved your hands up his neck, playing with the curls on the nape.

you whined as he pulled away entirely, pulling him impossibly closer to yourself. “why’d you stop?”

“isn’t there a rule about strenuous activities post surgery?” he teased, laughing as he pressed another kiss to your lips briefly; he had waited too long to do this and he didn’t wanna stop now. “making out seems pretty strenuous to me.”

“i’ll kiss it better.”

[deadhands69]

Something More [than sleep]

Katsuki Bakugo x gn/afab reader

MDNI This series contains eventual smut + AFAB

Setting: fuckboy!Bakugo, mid-time skip, Senior Year of College. Reader did not attend UA high, just joined for university. Enemies to lovers (with a lot in between.)

Warnings, etc: this series contains eventual smut, slight angst, light violence/injuries, mentions of drinking/intoxication, swearing, self deprecating thoughts.

part 1  -  part 2  -  this is part 3  -  part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

Between sleeping and binging the anime you’re watching, the weekend passes quickly. Before you know it, it’s Monday morning and you’re walking into Recovery Girl’s office. 

She works her magic and you feel the burns on your arms and back disappear. Inhaling deeply, only now do you realize how much the pain had been constricting your breathing.  Looking down, there’s barely a trace of the injury - only small scars remaining on your wrists if you look closely.

“Thanks,” you say before standing up too quickly. Your tired body tries to pull you back down.

After scalding you for your impatience, she gives you the usual rundown: sleep, eat, drink water, basically take care of yourself, before setting you free and you’re out the door. 

You yawn and a cloud of mist puffs from your mouth. The air feels colder today. 

Getting back takes forever. Your tired legs want to give out, but you trudge along anyways. Flinging your heavy feet in front of you one at a time before you’re back to your dorm.  

Without bothering to change, you collapse on your bed. 

Squinting at your bright cell phone - it’s nearly 7pm already. Your eyes squeeze shut and you reopen them, feeling groggy and admittedly a bit delirious from sleeping so much the last four days. This weekend has wrecked your circadian rhythm. Honestly, you want to go back to sleep. Then you remember, you have to text Bakugo - your now friend-not-quite-friend who you find weirdly attractive in a way that kind of makes you hate yourself a little.

“Might as well get this over with,” you mumble to yourself.

Looking down at the tiny screen in front of you, you scroll through your texts to find his name. It’s right by a drunk picture of the two of you. Now that you’re supposed to be friends you figured you should update his contact with a pic and this is the only one you have. You type and retype the message a few times before deciding, fuck it it’s just him and hit send.

You [hey, just woke up] Bakugo [Took you long enough.] Bakugo [See you soon.]

Heaving yourself out of bed, you change into tight workout pants and a more suitable shirt and jacket. In a moment of desperation, you chug the leftover cup of coffee on your desk that you didn’t finish this morning. Instant regret. It’s cold, stale, and some grounds have settled into the bottom of the cup. You choke down half of it before running into your bathroom to brush the remaining bits out off your teeth.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK.

That was fast.

Quickly, you rinse your frothy mouth before rushing to open the door.

“Hey, Backfire.” Bakugo says pushing into your room. Glancing at the combination toothpaste-coffee stain on your shirt he adds, “you don’t hafta rush, the forest will still be there.” He walks past you dressed head to toe in black carrying a small bento box. Handing you the box, he continues, ”I said I owe you and since you slept all day after healing the burns I gave you, I made you this.”

Opening it, the smell of teriyaki and steamed rice overwhelms you.

“You made this?” you ask, a bit shocked he knows how to cook.

“Yeah. It’s not poisoned, stop staring at it and eat so we can go.”

Tentatively, you take a bite. It’s amazing. 

So he’s a great cook too, you’re so fucked.

The icy air engulfs you the moment you open the doors to leave, making you glad to have thrown on a few extra layers. Your voice muffled slightly by the buff over your face. This doesn’t matter though because you honestly can’t think of much to say. All your brain keeps going back to is how on a cold, dark winter night like tonight you’re sure there’s a line of girls waiting to warm up in his bed. Yet here he is trudging through the freezing campus with you. As a friend, you should feel guilty for pulling him away from his social life. But you don’t. Something closer to relief washes over you and you try not to think too much into it.

“Maybe we should have gone to Ground Beta or something instead,” you try to enunciate through the layers of fabric.

“No, there’s cameras and they don’t like it when you sneak in after hours,” glancing at you, “trust me I’ve tried.”

“Okay, I definitely need to hear that story.”

Time passes quickly as you make your way to the other side of campus listening to him talk. He tells you all about his fight with Midoria, how he won, how much trouble they got in. Quickly skimming over the reasons for the fight in the first place, you can’t help but wonder what the rest of the story is but you’re glad to see another side of him.

The two of you come to a clearing in the forest and decide it's as good a spot as any. Admittedly, up to this point neither of you had considered how to actually work together. Based on what you’ve seen, it doesn’t seem like that’s something that comes naturally to him.

“So,” you start, “using our quirks together.”

Bakugo furrows his brows in consideration, 

“I could use you as a shield,” he says. 

You laugh before realizing he’s serious.

“Yeah, but you'll have to be careful. If your aim is even slightly too close it'll all bounce back at you.”

“Have you ever played pool?” he asks. 

For the next hour, you practice aiming his explosions in various directions by bouncing them off your quirk. Once you get that down, you add movement: running, kicking off of trees, etc. Shedding your extra layers from the warmth of exercise mixed with the heat of his blasts. Much to your surprise, you're both having fun. 

A huge grin flashes in front of your face before you're surrounded by hot light. Bakugo’s heavy boots land just behind you. 

“Wait. Hold still for a sec,” he says before popping his quirk off right by your shoulder. “Your quirk extends out from you by a few inches. Can you move it further?” he asks. 

“Yeah, probably. I used to have to get hit by attacks first and learned to push it outside of me, same idea. I’ve never had reason to try before. I think I can though, give me a moment.”

Closing your eyes, you focus on the energy surrounding you. With a huge exhale, you send it out further. It feels similar but the lines blur the further they extend from you. Something to work on.

“Okay,” your eyelids peek open, “I think this is as far as I can get it. It might not be too strong though.”

He's already testing the bounds of your expanded force field. 

“huh, maybe I could use you as a shield,” he mumbles, “I'd have to be pretty close though.”

It's a simple statement with nothing underneath. 

He’s being objective. 

It’s just an offhand idea for a stupid project.

Regardless, your heart nearly jumps out of your chest at the thought. Every voice in your head screams yes and no simultaneously. He's still busy testing how his quirk works closer to you, hopefully he doesn't notice how flustered the proximity is making you.

“Okay, I think I've got it, but it might be a little weird,” he bites his lip before continuing, “if you climb on my back, I won't be able to use my blasts to propel us forward. You'll have to grab onto my shoulders and wrap your legs around my waist. And hang on tight.”

“...you want me to latch onto you like a koala?” you huff out incredulously, feeling like you’ve betrayed every instinct to jump on him. 

“What, do you have a better idea?” his already cold-blushed cheeks grow a deeper shade of red. 

“No. That's fine. Let's try it,” you say as nonchalantly as you can muster. 

“I’m not gonna drop you,” he reassures you, “I’ve never dropped anyone.” 

Gripping his shoulders, you try to pretend you haven’t wanted to for the last week. Reminding yourself, even if he’s hot, he’s still Bakugo and all the personality that comes with that. He grabs the back of your thighs to help you up.

“Ready?” 

You nod and pull in close.

Warm. 

Everything about him emanates warmth. His body. His explosions. He even smells warm.

The world moves around you, but it’s all a blur. Focusing on keeping your quirk activated is all you can do, completely sucked into him. For the next minutes (it could be an hour for all you know, time barely continues to exist) there is nothing but Bakugo. 

His hair lightly brushing the side of your face every time he turns his head. You thought it would be prickly but everything about him feels softer up close.

The muscles in his back rippling under his shirt as you cling to him.

You’re reminded of the closet, it really isn’t so bad being close to him. You could get used to this.

Then there’s the ground.

You come back to your senses and quickly as your back slides across the forest floor. No real damage, as far as you can tell Bakugo’s arms shielded your fall. For a moment you lay in place, the cold dirt in stark contrast to the warm body tangled around you.

“Never dropped anyone, huh?” you tease.

“Usually not carrying a fucking distraction around with me,” he grumbles into your neck. 

“Oh this is my fault, is it? I was completely focused on my quirk, I wasn’t even talking to you. So tell me how I’m a distraction, hmm?”

He presses up enough for you to see the blush taking over his face, probably from embarrassment. Wordlessly, he gazes down at you before closing his eyes. You feel the skin of his nose on yours as he moves in closer.

Just as his mouth touches yours he opens slightly, clamping his teeth lightly over your bottom lip. Your pulse tickles under his bite before he releases, pressing a quick kiss on your lips and pulling away.

Out of words, you stare up at him. Fingers still locked tightly onto his back, keeping him close but he makes no efforts to move.

Light snowflakes fall around you. Glistening in his hair, landing gently to melt down the side of his warm cheeks. His heavy lidded eyes peer into yours and you feel like you could drown in them.

He's so fucking beautiful and you're tired of pretending he isn't. 

part 4

m.list

Taglist: @anonymity-222 @k1tk4tkatsuki

[hannibals-favourite-meal]

Hi can you write like a small one-shot where thor sneaks the reader into Asgard to surprise loki for Christmas and because she needs to tell him that shes pregnant

.⋆｡The Things He Left Behind｡⋆.

Loki x plus size reader

Pregnancy announcements can be terrifying even for regular people but with your baby daddy being a Frost Giant, god, a criminal and someone who has pretty much implied he doesn’t want kids, you have a long uphill battle. Oh, and it’s Christmas

Warnings: pregnancy, fear of rejection, fluff, brief mentions of morning sickness and nausea, implied smut, tiny bit of angst

WC: 2.7k

Minors DNI

Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library

Being pregnant was an interesting phenomenon; a person was growing inside of you, someone who would grow up to be their own adult. You knew logically that at only a couple months along, the baby was simply a clump of cells that would eventually mature into something new. But already, you were so attached to the life that could be.

Normally, something so monumental as being pregnant with a child born from love between life partners would be celebrated, but your heart was filled with dread and fear. The relationship you had was rocky at best, not in terms of love, there was plenty of that, but because he was a criminal and a dangerous one at that.

It was a punishment for his crimes. He was to be kept on Earth, stuck with the men and women he had attempted to rule. You met him by chance, accidentally bumping into the striking god as you were rushing to attend a meeting on behalf of your boss. As you fell to the floor, you caught his eyes and something shifted within you as it did within him.

Your love had been secret, growing in the darkness of the dead of night, in shadowy corridors and empty rooms. Your soul ached for him as if he held a piece of you in his cold hands, never to be returned. You were his just as much as he was yours and for a time, that was enough. 

But as the months carried on, the looming threat of his inevitable departure became monstrous. There was no changing his fate, he would have to leave and you both knew that your pleas and your begging for him to stay would fall on deaf ears. So on his last night with you, he slipped from the not-so-watchful eyes of Earth’s greatest heroes and stole you away.

He took you to Paris, lavishing you with gifts that you still held sacred to this day. He worshipped you with everything he had, taking you apart over and over again until the cold light of day washed over your naked bodies and he was forced to leave your bed in handcuffs.

But jewels and books were not the only things he left you. 

The exhaustion came first, then the extreme tenderness of your breasts, and lastly, the dreaded morning sickness. Your boss, Maria Hill, was the first to broach the issue with you after you had fallen asleep at your desk one too many times. She shoved the box of tests into your hand, telling you it was ok and that she knew but didn’t judge. 

Now, as the first snow of the year began to fall and your stomach was beginning to round out, you approached the one man who could help you. “Thor?” His eyes met yours from over the back of the huge leather sofa. A pop-tart crumb hung on the corner of his lips which fell off as soon as he smiled when he saw you. 

“Ah! My brother’s love! How are you on this fine day?” You chuckled humorlessly and decided to indulge the god for a bit before asking him a favour which might get him into some serious trouble.

“I’m doing ok, looking forward to Christmas.” You nervously shuffled on your feet, the modest kitten heels you had been forced to wear because of your aching feet, clicking against the dark hardwood flooring. Even with his deep confusion regarding human behaviour, Thor could see how anxious you were.

He shifted forward and rose from the couch then turned to you. “There is something amiss, what is it?”

“You need to get me to Asgard. I have to see Loki.” He froze as a bewildered look came over his face. 

“I cannot do that my lady. Even I am not allowed to visit my brother and he is, well he is my little brother. Odin has ordered him to be isolated from everyone as his-“

“I’m pregnant!” You blurted out, interrupting the god. “I’m pregnant with Loki’s baby.” Thor’s body physically seized as the weight of your words hit him. His blue eyes went wide with shock, and if you weren’t mistaken, maybe a little bit of excitement. 

Tentatively, he inched closer to you. Like a puppy, he was vibrating with nerves. “Really!” Unable to help yourself, you smiled at your friend.

“Really really.” Your hand came to rest on the soft fat above your womb. “But Thor, Loki needs to know. And I need help, I don’t know how a human body will handle growing a half-Frost Giant demigod.” 

“Yes.” He agreed. “Yes! We must bring you back home and then we can fix all of this.” Thor looked frazzled as he righted himself in front of you. “Mother will have some idea of what to do and I’m sure she will be able to sneak you into the prison.” Before you could realise what was happening, Thor had swept you into his muscular arms and was running through the compound.

“Thor! We can’t go now! I need to get my things!” You bounced with every step he took and you clung to his shirt. 

Thor shook his head. “I can bring you new things, we must get you home.” The winter air hit you like a slap in the face as the god bounded outside, not even flinching at the drastic change in temperature. “Just hold tight my friend, you will be with your beloved soon enough!”

——————

Asgard was completely overwhelming and as you walked through the golden streets, arm linked with Thor’s, you finally understood why Loki spoke so ill of the place. Each and every person you passed carried an air of smug superiority about them, even as they bent in a shallow bow or curtsy to their prince. They were gods, perfect beings who had conquered worlds and existed for thousands of years in peace.

The huge palace drew closer and your hold tightened around Thor. You had the distinct urge to hold your belly for comfort, to know that part of Loki was still with you, but you were scared of the judgemental gazes of the beautiful people around you. “We are almost there my friend. I will take you straight to the Allmother.”

He patted your hand kindly. “Everyone here is scarily beautiful.” You mutter under your breath but evidently he heard you.

“Then you will fit right in.” He murmured back as you stepped over the threshold to his childhood home. The ornate walls towered over you both, sealing you into a place you should have never been. The gold is almost blinding, coating pretty much every surface as far as the eye could see.

You cringed at the loudness of your small heels against the floor, the sound echoing through the great halls like a drum. Your fingers curled into Thor’s warm skin. He glanced down at you but your eyes were fixed straight ahead, oblivious to his gaze. He just started walking faster, unable to find the words to comfort you.

The smell of lilies invaded your senses, turning your stomach. Your nausea had settled after your first trimester ended but apparently the baby just didn’t like flowers. The smell steadily became stronger, as did the urge to throw up but by the time you reached a set of dark oak doors, your nerves were far more overpowering.

Before Thor could even raise his fist to knock, the doors swung inwards, revealing a bright but homey room absolutely bursting with colour. An older woman stood in the entryway, dressed simply in a flowing green dress, her dark blonde hair braided back simply. Her eyes lit up with a knowing light. “My Thor.” She cooed, easily accepting a crushing hug from the god before she turned to you. 

“I have been waiting to meet you for a very long time my dear.” She said plainly and suddenly all your nerves were gone. Your grimace floated into a smile as her arms wrapped around you in a hug so loving it made your chest burn with affection. 

Unable to stop yourself, you nuzzle into her safe embrace, your whole body relaxing. She laid a kiss to your temple before pulling away but her hands remained firmly on your shoulders. “Loki has told me all about you, he will be happy to see you.”

Anxiety returned like a tidal wave, washing away the warm feeling your almost mother-in-law gave you. Your smile dimmed while your hands came to rest on your lower stomach. “He might not be as excited when he learns why I’m here.” 

Frigg’s hands move to cup your rounded cheeks, forcing you to meet her eyes. “He loves you and he will love the child. Even if it doesn’t seem that way at first. Now let us make sure you and the little one are fed and healthy and then you can see him.” She took you by your left hand and guided you further into the room as Thor, with a huge smile on his face, left the two of you alone to talk.

——————

Christmas was vastly different on Asgard, you learned quickly. There was no snow, no cold, no carols or quiet nights. It mainly consisted of feasts and celebrations that lasted for days. But what was the same were the gifts. Thousands were exchanged through the festivities and Thor had somehow gotten into his head that you were the gift he was going to give to his estranged brother.

Much to his own and his mother’s amusement, he ripped up a piece of fabric and tied it in a bow around your midsection. “Come now! He will love it!” You just huffed and rolled your eyes but allowed him to continue making small adjustments to the bow. 

Frigg sat on one of the many couches in her chambers, sipping on a now mostly cold cup of tea as she laughed at the pair of you. A large weight had been lifted from the room now that the healer had confirmed the baby was healthy and growing as they should. 

And now, a warmth grew within you. This was what you wanted, a loving family with the man who had so easily snatched up your heart. All of the material things he had left behind were nothing compared to this moment. 

As the sun began to set over the great city, you were bundled up in a thick cloak that disguised you well and led you down to the prison. The guards turned their heads as who they assumed was the queen passed by on her nightly visit to her younger son. They knew it was technically not allowed by the king but it stopped the dark prince from destroying his cell every chance he got, so they just let it happen.

His cage was kept far away from the others, isolated for his crimes, even from those who faced the same harsh punishments. Yet he was given luxuries that none of the others were afforded, Loki assumed it was pity from his adoptive family that drove them to decorate the small room with lavish goods.

From the angle at which you entered his part of the prison, you could clearly see your love without him seeing you. You felt like crying. He was so close, you swore if you reached out just a few inches, you could touch him. 

Loki was sitting on the ground, his back to you, as he stared off into space. His hair, normally clean and beautifully styled, fell in front of his face in unruly raven waves, partially hiding his paler than normal skin. He was barefoot and wearing clothes that should have been changed days ago.

Your heart lurched at the sight of him. In the months you had known him, you had never seen the god so… broken.  And you supposed that’s what he was. He had been tortured and betrayed, cast aside by the only people he had known as his family before being labelled a criminal and thrown away to rot. Tears blurred your vision before you quickly wiped them away with a sniffle.

“I have told you that I do not want to see anyone mother.” He hissed, letting his head fall back against the enchanted glass as he did so.

“I had hoped that you would make an exception for me.” Your voice was weak but just the sound alone caused his whole body to freeze. 

Slowly, almost cautiously, he rose to his feet, turning on his heel to face you. As soon as his eyes met yours, his body visibly fell and his face disappeared behind his hands. “Loki?” A heartbreaking sob ripped from his lungs as he collapsed to his knees.

Panic set your veins alight and with a trembling hand, you used the small magic key Frigg had bestowed upon you to enter the cell. You wasted no time, immediately taking him into your arms for the first time in months.

His face burrowed into the crook of your neck as he wound around you. He shook in your embrace, his tears soaking through your clothes as he cried, holding onto you as tight as you could. You placed kiss after kiss to his head in a vain attempt to sooth him as you succumbed to your own emotions.

“Are you really here?” You tried to answer him through the tears but all you could get out was more of a grunt than a word but you nodded against his hair and squeezed him even tighter. “H-how?”

Loki pulled away from you just enough to meet your gaze. His eyes were bloodshot, making the blue of his irises even more striking. “Thor and your mother.” You managed to stammer out. 

There was a brief moment of silence as his dark brow furrowed in what you assumed to be confusion. His gaze dropped down to your body, still hidden by the thick cloak, then looked around the cell as if searching for someone. “Who else is here? I sense another presence.” 

“That's why I came here.” You gently guided his left hand down to your bump that seemed to grow each day, laying his palm flat against your stomach. “I’m pregnant.”

Loki’s breath caught, his eyes going wide. And he flinched.

Immediately, you were consumed by the fear you had tried so hard to tamp down since the first moment you saw that little plus sign on the test. He didn’t want the baby, he didn’t want you. This whole thing was a mistake, your mind screamed at you. But as your muscles tensed like you were preparing to run, Loki snapped out of it.

The world blurred around you and suddenly you were laying on a small bed in the corner, Loki hovering over you. His lean body slid easily between your soft thighs, pinning you to the surprisingly comfortable mattress with his weight. “My love. You’re truly with child?” His voice shook, his hand returning to your stomach.

“26 weeks as of yesterday and perfectly healthy.” He nodded and met your gaze once more, a small smile growing on his pallid lips.

“I had a feeling. I thought- I thought something happened to you but it was just a new life being formed.” You breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed against the bed.

“And how would you know that?” You cooed, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“Darling just because I have been locked away doesn’t mean that I can’t still use my magic.” His hand slipped up your front, obviously intending to go for your swollen breast but he paused at the extra piece of fabric that was now laying around your waist. “What is this?”

You responded with a giggle. “A bow. Thor wanted to give me to you for Christmas.” A fond look came over his face then, a realisation that you were not yet privy to.

“Indeed this is the best gift he could have ever given me.” Then for the first time in six months, he kissed you.

And as he stripped away your clothes and made love to you more tenderly than ever before, you couldn’t help but agree- this was the best gift to ever have been given

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[luna-desert]

five pebbles iterator superstructure is too small so he will use galvanized square steel to expand it. Among other things written text:

Let's transform a 0 square meter space into a functional iterator superstructure. five Pebbles worked diligently for 10 cycles saving 1 million pearls to buy his own superstructure. however the space he could afford was only 0.01 square meters. So tiny that not even his inspector could live there. The only option left was to summon his Rot but since Five Pebbles has a fear of cancer, he found himself crying every night. So he decides to reinstall it like this. First use galvanized square steel to create a frame that extends outside. He can borrow some screws from his neighbor Looks To The Moon. Covering the frame with wood veneer will make it both beautiful and neat. Change the karma gate to the metropolis be permanently locked. Perfect for keeping out slug cats and smelly scavengers. Install large broken bridge aluminum windows for panoramic views. Construct a bed cabinet beneath the window to store rare faction cell. Water and neuron flies. Lay down a soft mattress on the bed cabinet. Making it a cozy sleeping space for both Five Pebbles iterator puppet and his arm. Surround the area with galvanized square steel that doubles as a safety barrier. Then, install a folding table that can be used as both a workspace and a dining table. Folding down when not in use to saving space. above, Beside the bed, install a clothes rail for hanging regularly worn outfits. Next to this, place a storage board where Little Pebble can store essentials before bed. For entertainment, install a small wet cardboard box to play in. Turning the small space into a personal joy. With these enhancements, even in a limited space, Five Pebbles can live a wonderful and fulfilling life. Making the most of his compact superstructure.

[theladysunami]

As someone who doesn’t speak a lick of Chinese (and really struggles to distinguish tones), I have some question for any fluent Chinese speakers.

It’s a common trope in SVSSS fanfiction where Shen Qingqiu and/or Shang Qinghua use terms for modern technology and the PIDW natives around them are puzzled by it.

What sort of homophones (or near homophones) are there for words like “airplane,” “cell phone,” “television,” “refrigerator,” “microwave,” and so forth? In other words, what might PIDW natives think they’re hearing while trying to listen in on the transmigrators? Are there any (near) homophones that depend on the dialect being spoken?

If the PIDW natives saw the words written, rather than heard them, what meanings might they come up with based on the characters used?

I can guess at some possible interpretations by looking things up in Yabla’s Chinese English Pinyin Dictionary, but they’re rough guesses at best.

I’d be delighted if someone actually knowledgeable could provide some insight on what Mobie-jun and Luo Binghe might think their husbands are talking about when they hear them use words and phrases “from their hometown.”

Edit: Apparently my homophone guesses weren't nearly as terrible as I'd feared, so I'm going to edit this and stick some of them under a read more for fun.

Native speakers please feel free to bully me if I screw up!

Airplane (飞机, fēi jī) "Flying Machine" 飞, fēi: "to fly" ● 机, jī: "machine" Possible Homophones: ● "Flying Chicken" (飞鸡) We definitely need fics where everyone thinks SQQ insists on calling SQH a chicken for some reason.

Cell Phone (手机, shǒu jī) "Hand Machine" 手, shǒu: "hand," "to hold" ● 机, jī: "machine" Possible Homophones: ● "Head/Chief Chicken" (首鸡) ● "Hand Muscle" (手肌) Does Shizun need a hand massage, or miss the "top-dog" chicken he grew up with? Who knows!

Telephone (电话, diàn huà) "Electric Talk" 电, diàn: "electric" ● 话, huà: "language," "speech," "talk" Possible Homophones: ● "Palace Talk" (殿话) ● "Shop Talk" (店话) The most likely guesses seem to be that the phrase has something to do with situational modes of speech. How one speaks in a palace hall, or how one speaks in an inn/shop.

Television (电视, diàn shì) "Electric View" 电, diàn: "electric" ● 视, shì: "to look at," "to regard" Possible Homophones: ● "Court Examination," "Imperial Exam" (殿试) ● "Think on/Remember a Matter," "Worry About Things" (惦事) Why demon lord husbands would pine after imperial exams is anyone's guess.

Refrigerator (冰箱, bīng xiāng) "Ice Box" 冰, bīng: "ice" ● 箱, xiāng: "box" No homophones needed. Meaning is obvious. Huzzah!

Microwave (微波炉, wēi bō lú) "Tiny Wave Stove" 微, wēi: "tiny" ● 波, bō: "wave," "ripple" ● 炉, lú: "stove," "furnace" Possible Homophones: ● "Power Sowing Furnace" (威播炉) No great options here, so they'd likely assume it's some special pill furnace variety.

Car/Automobile (汽车, qì chē) "Steam Vehicle" 汽, qì: "steam," "vapor" ● 车, chē: "vehicle," "chariot" (archaic) Possible Homophones: ● "Qi Chariot" (气车) ● "Near Vehicle" (汔车) A Qi powered chariot sounds pretty neat actually. The phrase could mean something like "whatever vehicle is nearest" though? Or a short range vehicle? (Google translate interpreted 汔车 as "car racing").

Courtesy of @hopingforbrain

airplane's full name can be heard as 'beating (up) flying chickens to the sky'. not in the wanking way, but actually throwing hands with the poultry.

[moralesispunk]

I have no clue if you're taking requests, but how about dad! Simon or girldad! Simon with a baby girl and he and wife! reader gets her ears peirced, and their baby starts crying hysterically! (Bonus if wife! Reader starts crying too cuz she feels bad)

Husband Simon Riley x Wife! Reader (x and daughter)

ahhh tumblr did not give me my ask box notifications so I have a few to work through - fluff first!

but i can so see this :(

Simon holds your baby - Lucy - on his lap, two of her tiny hands playing with the fingers of one of his hands and her little legs kicking to the radio playing over the speakers. Her face is bright and excited after picking out the sparkles for her ears. Simon's face - on the other hand - is not bright or excited.

His hand that Lucy is not playing with is curled protectively around her, his palm pressing against her belly and holding her snug against him when the piercer walks into the room.

"Hi Lucy," she sing-songs, "hi mum and dad."

"Hi." You smile back but Simon only grimaces. "Jesus Si," you mumble when he winces as the piercer starts to unpackage the equipment, "you'd think it was you getting pierced."

"Feels like it," he mutters.

Lucy doesn't notice her dads nervous energy, her attention on the piercer and you as you chat through everything even as Simon clings to her like he's going to run from the room with her cuddled under his arms.

It's not that you're happy that Lucy is going to feel a pinch of pain, not when every single cell in your body would do anything to stop her from feeling pain ever, it's how endearing Simon's behaviour is.

Your six foot three, burly, ex-military husband, Simon.

Simon who almost made you late for Lucy's first vaccinations because his hands shook so much trying to get her out of her car seat. Simon who cushioned every corner of every surface when she showed the first sign of walking

Simon who frowns when her bottom lip starts to wobble on the first piercing and whose eyes get glassy when she starts to all out cry with the second ear.

"All done, all done," the piercer soothes, though more for father or daughter you're not sure.

Simon immediately turns her in his arms, her head tucked under his chin and his hand rubbing soothing circles on her back. You swear you see him lift a hand to wipe a stray tear off his cheek with his thumb and you bite back a smile.

"Well done," the piercer holds out a sticker, Lucy's red rimmed eyes peeking open from where they had been pressed against Simon's chest. "Do you want to put it on?"

She mumbles something that sounds like "daddy" so Simon takes the sticker, peeling it and pressing on the sleeve of her tshirt before he stands.

You walk towards the till, Simon still pouting and awkwardly reaching for his wallet in his back pocket even as he holds Lucy against his chest.

"C'mere honey," you say, taking her into your arms and letting her head rest on your shoulder as her arms wrap around your neck. "Look how sparkly your ears are now."

She starts to smile, and while Simon pays you walk over to the mirror. You ohh and ahh until she's giggling and standing in front of the mirror, looking at her piercings.

Simon comes up behind you, a hand on the bottom of your back and his attention on Lucy.

"See," you say, "she's happy now."

Simon just grunts and you chuckle, reaching for Lucy's hand and wrapping your other arm around Simon's.

"Come on, you two," you say, "I'll treat you both to some ice-cream for getting through that."

And even though Simon rolls his eyes, you see the way the corner of his mouth twitches into an almost smile.

[amphibiahawks321]

🏯INAZUMA🏯

[The arataki gang inside a jail cell]

Itto : I can't believe they arrested us!

M!Reader : I know Right!?

Akira : We were so close!

Itto : After we get out this BOX we'll all one hundred percent get it right next time!

M!Reader : Yeah!-

[The guard slams his spear on the bars]

(Guard) : please be quiet! Sighs... somebody bailed you out...

Arataki Gang/Itto/M!Reader : Wait really!?

[Sara walks towards their jail cell and intensely stares at all of them]

Sara : ......

[All of them IMMEDIATELY hide behind Y/N]

M!Reader : ......H-Hehe Heeeeeey babyyyy

Sara : ......Sighs open the cell

[The guard opens the jail cell and walks inside it]

M!Reader : T-Thanks for the bail out 💧^v^

Sara : ......

M!Reader : y-you're not mad r-right?

Sara : Sighs no... I've dealt with this gang too much to even be mad at you Y/N...

[Y/N enthusiastically and immediately walked up to Sara and kiss her on the cheek making her form a tiny blush]

Sara : Come on let's go

[Sara and Y/N walked out of the cell]

Itto : Oh hell yeah! Another victory for the Arataki Gan–

Sara : Who said I'll let all of you out.....

M!Reader : .....

Itto : .....

Arataki gang : .....

[Their cell immediately got closed]

Arataki gang/itto : HUH!?!?

Sara : I'm only here for Y/N...

Itto : Wha!?– that's not fair!

Sara : too bad...

[Sara walks away from their cell]

Itto : Y/N come on man please convince her!

M!Reader : You know Sara wouldn't listen if it means getting our gang out of prison, but don't worry! I'll seek out Shinobu to bail you guys out!

Itto : Please be back for us!

Mamoru : This jail reeks so bad!