#Scum Villian’s Self Saving System

[anyanary]

Pre-wine activities

[fairsweetlonging]

headcanon that shen qingqiu (yuan) once yanked his plate away when someone reached for it and yue qingyuan got all teary eyed about it because his xiao jiu still has food insecurities and the memory loss must have made it worse, and he keeps getting shen yuan snacks and treats that he can squirrel away because yue qingyuan knows what it's like to worry about where your next meal comes from, and he's trying to help by ensuring that shen qingqiu is never without

meanwhile shen yuan has never truly been hungry but he did have two older brothers and a younger sister who would shamelessly steal things from his plate when they grew up and the instinct to protect his food has never left him so he WILL bite someone when they reach for his protagonist-made spring rolls

[incorrectly-quoting-mxtx]

The lack of shipping wars in the Scum Villian fandom is really fucking funny because we all ship different people with the main character Shen Qingqiu, and instead of fighting about it, we collectively decided that he deserves to have a harem consisting of every single guy in the book.

[jobycewl]

Once again attacked by the system’s husband plots! How will the husbands cope with being race-swapped?!?

[theladysunami]

I had a very odd dream where a train (or bus?) I was on got yanked into another world. While my dream had nothing to do with SVSSS, it did have my waking self thinking about how hilarious and/or horrifying such a thing could be as an AU.

Imagine Shen Yuan riding the subway, train or bus one day, when something happens and his whole car gets yanked into the world of PIDW. Nobody else in the car knows anything about PIDW, so Shen Yuan finds himself with the self imposed task of keeping this eccentric group of strangers alive in a weird world full of demons, monsters, and aphrodisiac plants.

The group’s first assumption would probably be that they’re still on modern earth, and just got teleported somewhere. Their second assumption, if they come across common folk, might be they somehow ended up in the past.

Then they run into some monster, or people riding on swords with specific uniforms, or a commoner mentions a name or event only Shen Yuan recognizes. The rest of the party debates what sort of Xianxia or Wuxia world they’ve ended up in, while poor Shen Yuan sweats bullets. He knows exactly what world they are in, and they are so screwed.

I have this image of poor beleaguered nerd Shen Yuan successfully protecting and leading this group of primary school kids, their cute teacher, and a handful of grannies and grandpas, while all the other adults and older teens keep wandering off and getting themselves in trouble.

[ynkfva]

Saw this post and immediately thought of him

[aideski]

Goodbye i’m thinking about how different transmigrated binghe bingyuan and binggeyuan roommate au’s are

It’s hilarious because bingmei and bingge are the same person but on completely different ends of the binghe spectrum

bingmei->shen yuan: 🥰😍❤️🫂🌹😭😭 (in mind: 🔞🔞🔞🔞🔞)

bingge->shen yuan: 😠😡🔞🔪🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️(in mind: 🥰😍❤️🫂🌹🔞🔞)

You may have noticed the vast difference of 🔞 between bingmei and bingge and is like to explain this with a “it’s bingmei.”

You, dear svsss enjoyer, should know why there’s not much i can say. little freak. (jk sorry bingmei we love you stay freaky)

You could argue that bingge would have a lot more 🔞 Yeah sure, but i think not as much as bingmei because even though bingge was the local harem collector in another universe, he genuinely hates SY so much that if he could, he would beat the shit out of him and leave his guts on the wall so his sister would find them (yk classic bingge behavior), but can’t because he’s admitted to himself that without SY’s care he’s useless

Bingge would hate SY so much because SY treat him like a baby. A stupid, little baby who doesn’t know how to operate the damn washing mashing. Bingmei would stand in front of the washing machine and patiently wait for SY to catch him loitering about like an NPC just so he gets the thrill of being noticed by his yuan-gege. Meanwhile, bingge would shove his not-safe washing machine clothes that SY bought for him online with clothes that can stain the entire clothes bunch into the machine and press a bunch of buttons not fully understanding what everything says because it’s in traditional chinese, and watch hours later as SY picks through the waching machine, face distraught as he folds every piece of clothing that’s now stained with pink (bingge accidentally added one of shen-mei’s shirts into the pile without noticing)

he would sit crisscrossed on the floor, seething in raw hate as SY towers over him in his skinny, short glory, pulling on bingge’s ear as he crashes out about hundreds of clothing pieces being ruined. It’s not even his clothes. It’s bingge’s. Which is why he’s even madder, because… gee, SY doesn’t know why, but this seems like a reasonable crashout reason and he’s been needing a reason to go apeshit, so yeah

Bingge’s hate would turn to despite because SY would force him to wear said pink clothes for a whole month. Everywhere.

LBG: Shen Yuan if I have to wear pink One More Time to the grocery market, I Will Slam Your Body On The Wall Headfirst

SY: try it. i have a google doc of how you look like and other information about you ready to be given to the police in case of my sudden death

LBG: no one would even know. No one would come looking for You

SY: your harem betrayed you.

LBG: Damn.

SY was half lying about said bingge information log. It’s not on a google doc, It’s on a word document. In a hard drive duck taped to his inner thigh. Why on his inner thigh? idk, SY isn’t that smart sometimes. He supposes that when he’s stripped for an autopsy they’ll just find this hard drive taped on him and mark LBG as a main suspect because SY’s word doc said so

Later on in their roommate-ship, binggeyuan goes from being liujiu toxicity levels to romantic, and when bingge is stripping SY for papapa SY completely forgets about the hard drive taped on him, so when bingge removes his lower clothes and spreads SY’s legs he just blue screens

LBG: yuan

SY: extremely horny, almost whining ?????

LBG: you weren’t lying about the “google doc”, weren’t you

SY: what.

So now the papapa is paused because SY now has to plug in the drive into his computer and show bingge what’s on it and bingge’s like “damn. he’s an even bigger obsessor than i am.” And bingge just get more horny from that. Binggeyuan bed shenanigans ensue

meanwhile while all of this is happening bingmei is desperately trying and embarrassingly failing to make SY understand that He!! Has!! A!! Crush!! On!! Him!!!!! SY, please!!!!!!!!

[ynkfva]

HELP THIS IS SO ACCURATE

instead of updating my current fic i made this;

it’s short and at times nonsensical pls enjoy. or don’t but pls lmk if u don’t and why :3

[mini-godzilla]

A mxtx crossover event where all the red-black characters had to fight, I believe, would result in a very interesting rock paper scissors scenario.

Wei Wuxian, being the Ghost Whisperer, could probably beat, or at the very least subdue Hua Cheng. We know Hua Cheng is weak to Ghost Stuff a la the Mount Tonglu opening incident, and Wei Wuxian has dealt with extremely powerful spirits in the past.

That being said, I think Hua Cheng could take Luo Binghe in a fight. This guy bested 33 heavenly officials, his swordplay is unmatched, and Luo Binghe is very powerful but I imagine that power comes with the side effect of very little finesse. Additionally his protagonist halo probably wouldn’t save him here since he’s not the only protagonist.

However, Luo Binghe would totally destroy Wei Wuxian. With his itty bitty Mo Xuanyu core he doesn’t stand a chance. Tearing through an army of the undead is the exact sort of op bullshit Binghe excels at, so that option is out too.

That being said, if their love interests are also fighting, Xie Lian bodies those fools. I’m sorry but even though Lan Wanji is excellent and SQQ is a peak lord, they do not stand a chance. Xie Lian’s favorite trick for 800 years was to break boulders on his chest while he had no access to any spiritual energy. Dude folded the heavenly emperor like a lawn chair. No contest.

[disgracefulthings]

Shen Qingqiu, handing Yue Qingyuan a baby: Hold this

Yue Qingyuan: Of course, Xiao-Jiu. Who is this?

Shen Qingqiu: This is Shen Yuan, our child. I gave birth to him. You will take responsibility

Yue Qingyuan: Of course. I will make preparations for our wedding ASAP

Shen Qingqiu: Good.

Qi Qingqi: I don't remember Shen Qingqiu being pregnant?

Mu Qingfang: I believe that our shixiong just grabbed some random orphan to baby trap Yue Qingyuan with

[teamunee]

twitter absolutely ate these up so heres some moshang sketchies

[fairsweetlonging]

shen yuan being animal obsessed to the point he starts trying to take everything remotely friendly home with him so one day returns with the xianxia equivalent of a scraggly possom that hisses at everyone it sees and that is definitely poisonous while still insisting its a little baby that needs a home

airplane never really expanded on the common creature worldbuilding in pidw like pigeons and cats and rabbits and raccoons, so shen yuan started filling in the blanks himself and oh boy did he fill it wrong. he pets a fox-like creature the size of a cow with horns and hooves like it's a horse not knowing that would be like trying to pet a grizzly bear. he coos over the owl-cats that live under overhangs and in dusty attics and really really wants one until liu qingge has to drag him away because they're some of the most awful aggressive pests you can have that swoop down on people and claw their faces open when they're mildly displeased.

one time he walked onto his peak with a six-legged spotted weasel in his sleeve bc it's so cute he just couldn't leave it!! not knowing said weasel is known as one of the most vicious predators because they tear through the calf muscles to cripple prey ten times their size and then eat them alive

however, because shen yuan has the disney princess subclass with a +7 proficiency in animal handling, it never goes wrong. he pets the fox-stag without an issue and it even allows him to climb onto its back. the owl-cats love him and happily play with his robes and fetch things for him. the six legged weasel lazes around the bamboo house all day and loves to be pet. the scaggly possom hisses at and hates everyone except shen yuan.

every other animal had to leave, except the possom. that is a fight they did not win. yue qingyuan only has so much strength and those teary eyes are lethal

[incorrectly-quoting-mxtx]

Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky: How dare u reblog my posts but not follow me.

Peerless Cucumber: If you find a bar of gold in a trash bag, will you take the whole trash can, or just the gold bar?

[jobycewl]

I. I have no excuse.

[theladysunami]

As someone who doesn’t speak a lick of Chinese (and really struggles to distinguish tones), I have some question for any fluent Chinese speakers.

It’s a common trope in SVSSS fanfiction where Shen Qingqiu and/or Shang Qinghua use terms for modern technology and the PIDW natives around them are puzzled by it.

What sort of homophones (or near homophones) are there for words like “airplane,” “cell phone,” “television,” “refrigerator,” “microwave,” and so forth? In other words, what might PIDW natives think they’re hearing while trying to listen in on the transmigrators? Are there any (near) homophones that depend on the dialect being spoken?

If the PIDW natives saw the words written, rather than heard them, what meanings might they come up with based on the characters used?

I can guess at some possible interpretations by looking things up in Yabla’s Chinese English Pinyin Dictionary, but they’re rough guesses at best.

I’d be delighted if someone actually knowledgeable could provide some insight on what Mobie-jun and Luo Binghe might think their husbands are talking about when they hear them use words and phrases “from their hometown.”

Edit: Apparently my homophone guesses weren't nearly as terrible as I'd feared, so I'm going to edit this and stick some of them under a read more for fun.

Native speakers please feel free to bully me if I screw up!

Airplane (飞机, fēi jī) "Flying Machine" 飞, fēi: "to fly" ● 机, jī: "machine" Possible Homophones: ● "Flying Chicken" (飞鸡) We definitely need fics where everyone thinks SQQ insists on calling SQH a chicken for some reason.

Cell Phone (手机, shǒu jī) "Hand Machine" 手, shǒu: "hand," "to hold" ● 机, jī: "machine" Possible Homophones: ● "Head/Chief Chicken" (首鸡) ● "Hand Muscle" (手肌) Does Shizun need a hand massage, or miss the "top-dog" chicken he grew up with? Who knows!

Telephone (电话, diàn huà) "Electric Talk" 电, diàn: "electric" ● 话, huà: "language," "speech," "talk" Possible Homophones: ● "Palace Talk" (殿话) ● "Shop Talk" (店话) The most likely guesses seem to be that the phrase has something to do with situational modes of speech. How one speaks in a palace hall, or how one speaks in an inn/shop.

Television (电视, diàn shì) "Electric View" 电, diàn: "electric" ● 视, shì: "to look at," "to regard" Possible Homophones: ● "Court Examination," "Imperial Exam" (殿试) ● "Think on/Remember a Matter," "Worry About Things" (惦事) Why demon lord husbands would pine after imperial exams is anyone's guess.

Refrigerator (冰箱, bīng xiāng) "Ice Box" 冰, bīng: "ice" ● 箱, xiāng: "box" No homophones needed. Meaning is obvious. Huzzah!

Microwave (微波炉, wēi bō lú) "Tiny Wave Stove" 微, wēi: "tiny" ● 波, bō: "wave," "ripple" ● 炉, lú: "stove," "furnace" Possible Homophones: ● "Power Sowing Furnace" (威播炉) No great options here, so they'd likely assume it's some special pill furnace variety.

Car/Automobile (汽车, qì chē) "Steam Vehicle" 汽, qì: "steam," "vapor" ● 车, chē: "vehicle," "chariot" (archaic) Possible Homophones: ● "Qi Chariot" (气车) ● "Near Vehicle" (汔车) A Qi powered chariot sounds pretty neat actually. The phrase could mean something like "whatever vehicle is nearest" though? Or a short range vehicle? (Google translate interpreted 汔车 as "car racing").

Courtesy of @hopingforbrain

airplane's full name can be heard as 'beating (up) flying chickens to the sky'. not in the wanking way, but actually throwing hands with the poultry.

[ynkfva]

I support shen jiu's and jin guangyao's rights and wrongs. I like when they do bad things