#Though it is a little false in some regards.

[neplusultros]

vague theory on the MTEFIL demon lords.

spoilers through 83 below. not a theory so much as a collection of random thoughts linking them up with their sources in christian folk tradition (and sometimes the bible) and musing on what that all means.

tl;dr: not even really a theory so much as I'm just collating a lot of information about the demons (and angels) that might not be clear if you're not familiar with certain parts of the western canon. the seven demon lords consist of four definitely fallen angels, two angels with weird statuses (Satan and Lucifer, naturally), and one of God's creations which is not actually an angel at all (Leviathan). The angels likely fell as a result of their own efforts to rebel against heaven, as in Paradise Lost. Support for this is clear in the manga's imagery and the few hints we have about Lucifer and Satan. A lot of this is just basic "western ideas about Satan" stuff but I figure not everyone has that knowledge base to work from.

first off, their names. Beelzebub, Belphegor, and Asmodeus in the Judeo-Christian tradition are all explicitly based on or at least share names with gods or demons or spirits from other religions. Beelzebub (as Ba'al Zevuv) and Belphegor (as Ba'al-Peor) are both named as false gods of the Philistines and Moabites respectively in the Old Testament* and Asmodeus, though only named in nonbiblical sources, is likely derived from the Zoroastrian "Aesma-Daeva". Mammon arguably also belongs with this group; though usually taken just to mean wealth or money, plenty of later writers baselessly asserted that Mammon was a Syrian god, so he probably fits in this category.

Satan is the only actual arguable biblical angel on the list, with "satan" or "the satan" appearing most famously as one of the "sons of God" (generally agreed to be angels) in the book of Job, where his role appears to be to test and prosecute (in a partially legal/courtroom sense) the faithful. "Lucifer" is a name closely identified with angels and Satan because of a particular verse (Isaiah 14:12) that used to translate a particular phrase that way. Because the passage describes the subject of the phrase being cast down by God, the verse is closely linked to the idea of fallen angels, though most modern translations render the phrase as "morning star" and the whole thing is textually about a particular unnamed Babylonian king anyways.

*using catholic terms here because, well, it's a manga about catholicism. probably gonna get some stuff wrong though

Of course, the most famous instance of Satan/Lucifer has very little to do with the Bible, because it's Milton's Paradise Lost! Plenty to say about this later, but for now what's interesting is that Lucifer is what he is called in Heaven, prior to the Fall, as afterwards all the names of the fallen angels (a third of heaven!) are spoken no more. So they are one and the same person: depending on who you ask, a charismatic rebel or self-serving striver, widely regarded as one of western literature's archetypal anti-heroes.

Traditional Christian angelic hierachies list the angels as Seraphim, Cherubim, Thrones, Dominations or Dominions, Virtues, Powers, Principalities, Archangels, and Angels, descending in order of authority. Milton...doesn't really give a shit about any of this, and sets up a situation wherein Archangels are the highest, with Raphael, Michael, and Gabriel described as Archangels (and therefore among the most powerful), same with Lucifer. Cherubs are implied to be a lesser order (at one point Lucifer disguises himself as a "stripling cherub"), which seems to line up with MTEFIL/EkuOto's world, in which the ability of Mr. Priest and Leah to call upon the archangels' powers means they are able to call on the forces closest to god. Similarly, Beelzebub refers to the purified bit of Asmodeus as "cherub," suggesting she's of a lower order than the archangels prior to her fall (and in turn suggests whatever he is at this point, it's not, strictly speaking, an angel).

The real pattern-breaker is Leviathan. Derived from an Ugaritic mythical sea serpent, Leviathan is a tannin, or sea-monster. Tanninim appear several places in the Old Testament, most notably Genesis (where God creates them in the very first chapter), and are often translated into English as "great whales" or "sea creatures" but are in fact not quite 1:1 with any animal. Leviathan's most notable appearance is in Job 39 and 40, where as part of his defense against Job's accusations (the Book of Job is really a courtroom drama), God says, in essence, "you all won't even fight leviathan. wait do you not know leviathan? lmao you don't even know leviathan. leviathan is this CRAZY sea serpent that breathes fire and breaks iron like wood. anyways if you aren't even brave enough to fight leviathan you ABSOLUTELY are not a bad enough dude to question me."

What's most interesting is that this positions Leviathan firmly as one of God's creations! And in fact, when Leviathan references the command God gave her to be fruitful and multiply in the ocean, she is both quoting Genesis directly and giving us a very clear idea of her origin: she was made on the fourth day with the other tanninim and creatures of the water and air. which is to say, she precedes humans!

So we have four lesser demon lords based on other religious traditions, two angels of biblical extraction (but really mostly Miltonian), and one of God's creatures. And actually, the visuals we've given largely line up with that!

Early on, Mr. Priest gives us a glimpse of the demons. It's impressively consistent with what we've seen so far: Asmodeus has her tower of bodies, Mammon's rings show up, Gluttony has the same ink-silhouette-mouth thing going on, Leviathan's child form is visible within her monster form's mouth behind the speech bubble naming her, and Belphegor has the snail imagery!

but also helloooooo look at their fucking halos. Six halos for seven demon lords...because Leviathan doesn't have one because she was never an angel in the first place, just one of God's creations. four of the halos are black, because these are fallen angels, but two of them are white. Why are you white? Were Satan and Lucifer archangels, and therefore incorruptible on some essential ontological level? Have they somehow been re-purified since the fall?

And why is Lucifer depicted with a halo and six wings, exactly like a classical Christian Seraphim?

The Seraphim being the highest order of angels in Christian angelology, nearest to God and eternally singing His praises. They traditionally have six wings, exactly as Lucifer is depicted here.

The final interesting piece of evidence we have about the Seven Demon Lords comes from the end of Beelzebub's fight. He's recalling his final fight with Rosa and her last words to him: "Y'know, I don't wanna dump this on the next generation. But I believe their love will trump your evil. They'll support each other. Help each other. And someday you'll lose to their righteousness." And then Leah drops a sick fucking axe kick on his head and rocks his world.

this doesn't have any relevance to the theory post it's just spiritually healing to look at

And then Leah taunts him ("Time for dessert, Lord of the Flies! Have any room left?!") and it's at that moment, when he's getting his ass kicked, that he has an unexpected and thus far totally unexplained flashback to what's very obviously the seven demon lord's tragic backstory as angels:

These are obviously the seven demon lords, not just from the text and Mammon's rings, but because there's only six of them. Which makes perfect sense! There's only six angels in the group, Leviathan presumably was not a part of whatever the angel stuff was!

Of course, the volume extras already came out and said all of this, to some extent!

"a certain researcher's personal note (2)," file 63

At this point it seems pretty clear to me that Aruma Arima is drawing on Milton's Paradise Lost. Interestingly, early on there's a file (from the same researcher who wrote the above, in fact) debating whether the gates of hell for demon lords (rather than regular demons, who get Leviathan's jaws), which look like Rodin's sculpture "The Gates of Hell," look that way because the gate of hell has a perfect Platonic form which Hell uses and which Rodin approached through genius and mastery, or if demon lords just use it because they think it looks cool. I would not be surprised to eventually get a note asking whether Milton received the truth of Paradise Lost from a divine source or if he somehow just guessed it perfectly.

Anyways, Paradise Lost goes like this: Lucifer is among the first of the archangels and everything is vibing fine in heaven. These halcyon days are disrupted when God calls an all-hands and announces His Son is here now and to him shall bow all knees in Heaven (typical nepo baby shit). Lucifer objects to this, refusing to exalt the Son and seeing himself (and, according to his speeches, other angels) as native-born sons of Heaven who bow to none but God. A third of angels join him, there is epic war, they are cast down to the fiery lake, where they are transformed into devils and their angelic names are stripped from them and replaced with the names of demons. As a result, Satan (the artist formerly known as Lucifer) undertakes to tempt man and cause his fall, leading to the main matter of the poem, the events of the Garden of Eden.

Thus, in Paradise Lost's cosmology, all devils were once angels. And this seems to track with a lot of what we have seen so far of MTEFIL/EkuOto's demons! It suggests the Researcher's note is correct: This is, on some level, an enormous family argument, especially if things track closely enough that Hell's demons are really just a third of what Heaven once was. Lucifer once led a rebellion against god, with the other demon lords as his allies; whatever ambitious or noble goals they once had ("Here at least / We shall be free . . . Here we may reign secure, and in my choyce / To reign is worth ambition though in Hell: / Better to reign in Hell, then serve in Heav’n.") they seem to have fallen to fractious squabbling, with Lucifer now absent and Satan seeming to have only limited and minimal authority, if any, with respect to the others.

A few questions this brief review against the classic Western sources raises:

What's up with Satan and Lucifer? Are they indeed somehow split from the same identity, or will this version have them as distinct people? If so, does the fact that Lucifer led the rebellion but is now absent serve as basically the explanation for why the Seven Demon Lords are now so disorganized?

What's up with Satan's wife? Not something he generally has. Is it the notably absent Lilith (who comes from Jewish and Christian folk traditions and not any particular religious text or Paradise Lost)?

Where is Jesus? I mean I don't usually see an anime with Catholic elements and expect there to be any reference to Jesus ever. But Milton's Paradise Lost is very much a Christian text; it is About Jesus as much as it is about anything else. And if the Son of God will not be appearing in this shonen (which, y'know, fair), why did Lucifer rebel?

[blackwaxidol]

Ah, I forgot my favourite beast...

*Scampers away and returns with the mangled, writhing, half-alive carcass of Valin between my jaws. Puts him at your feet...*

[soapcloth]

CW: Statue!Ghost x reader, size kink(?), horror aspects, scopophobia Pt 2 - not edited - dividers -> @/cafekitsune

In the museum storage where you work, you stare at the hard set visage of a man chisled out of marble.

hes a gargantuan thing, cold and smooth. Among all his little chips and fissures, one that stands out is a notch in his lip that must've happened somewhere along the exchange in the possession of this sculptural feat, you'd have to check his records to see.

It- you correct yourself, not him.

And yet, you can't help but feel his looming presence in the warehouse as you work about. There's a pregnant sense of tension in the stale air that makes you feel as if there are carved marble eyes locked onto you, something you manage to write off with the fatigue of a long shift. Sometimes if you get tired enough, you swear you can hear the low hum of a grating, scraping mass or the deep echo of shallow breath, a false phantom that pricks at your eardrums. Alive. Your mind would scream at you. He.

His documents, though dubious and questionable in origin had stated he had been in an army of some sorts- the history that had never been the kind to draw you to your job in the storage and archival of a museum; now, aside from a skull death mask in his perfectly chiseled hand, he stands completely bare, body heavier than his armor ever was.

Though you had tried to ignore him, he would defy you, silently demanding your regard.

Or, it had been silent until you started catching glimpses of a mammoth lugging its weight around the warehouse in the dead of night- acknowledging it had felt like bringing a curse upon yourself, the frequency of anomalous events increasing the more you accepted his presence in your mind. At first it was distant, far away enough to dismiss, but now you'd turn to find him dead still and watching, closer to you than he had been before; chasing you around when he knew you were alone until your shift ended.

When you'd leave the warehouse, you'd press your ear against the heavy door only to hear his rumbling breath right against the other side, daring you to step back inside.

[mioakem]

shut up i’m talking patreon episode summary (only 7 dollars btw)

jack starts it off explaining the lead up to the situation and saying how dream involved himself out of nowhere. he said it was all very lighthearted leading up to dreams involvement (they don’t like mizkif or xqc very much but found the whole thing funny)

tommy said he didn’t think it would escalate very far and started off talking the piss out of it but after the 3 hour stream he realized it was getting serious. he didn’t want to involve himself with dream very much because a lot of people around him were saying that he shouldn’t speak to dream because of the way he took advantage of him when he was 16. tommy said he attempted to resolve it privately in the past but after the if youtubers were honest video dream sent him very mean and awful messages and after that he told dream he was going to block him everywhere (which he did)

jack says that it’s nearly impossible to resolve drama with dream privately because he makes everything public (and also it’s incredibly hard to talk to him) jack said that after the episode with phil he had a 2 hour long call with dream where they basically just went back and forth and nothing was really resolved

jack says that this episode was filmed right after dreams video dropped. tommy makes fun of the title (i’m sorry but not to tommyinnit). jack then admits that he does talk about dream a lot and he does it because he feels like before everything he was one of the only ones who openly disliked dream. jack says that everytime jack has criticized him in a non joking manner it hasn’t been a rumor. the only time jack has mentioned pedo rumors was when he was drunk and a fan asked if dream was a pedo and he said he couldn’t legally answer that. he said he was drunk and put on the spot. jack said that though he doesn’t think dream is a pedo he does think that messaging fans is inappropriate and strange. jack said that when the allegations came out dream messaged in the discord saying they were false and said he’s open to any questions. jack answered saying that even though he didn’t think dream was a pedo it was a little weird to be messaging fans (especially underaged ones). dream talked to jack privately after that saying that the message annoyed him because jack was being skeptical.

jack then talks about how on dreams stream he said that he knew some rumors about jack but wasn’t gonna say them but then said that there were rumors about jack being unfaithful. jack said that the point of that was that when jack had rumors it was handled privately but when dream had rumors it was very public- which is incredibly hypocritical because dream made jack’s situation public knowing it was false but jack kept dreams rumor private in his own regard.

tommy then jokes about cheating on molly and then goes into the editor thing. jack said that it’s a lie and then passes it over to tommy. tommy said he has nothing to say because there’s physical evidence that he didn’t underpay them (actually very graciously paid them). tommy says that it feels very weird that all his private messages keep going public. jack then starts talking about how the unpaid editor situation was actually about him. he said that he was one month into doing youtube and worked a minimum wage job and asked an editor what they wanted to be paid and they agreed on 50 quid. they said they both were young and didn’t know how much she should’ve been paid and he didn’t make any money from youtube at the time anyways. he said that now youtube is his job and he is much more knowledgeable in appropriate payments.

they then bring up how dream skipped over george and also how the only clip he took from tubbos stream was the one of him agreeing with him. jack says he can’t believe that dream tried to “win” by using straight up lies and brings up how dream has a reputation of lying and he doesn’t know why he did it.

tommy says he said all he needed to say in the video and the video was meant for dream rather than the viewers (except for the promo at the end). he says that dream knows why tommy called him sexist and he said that there’s so much that isn’t out and it’s incredibly miserable. tommy said that he doesn’t wanna do this anymore and he doesn’t feel happy with youtube anymore because of the creators in the space. he says that he won’t be doing the whole youtube thing in a couple years, he will still post videos but he’s not gonna interact with all the shit going around, especially when the people involved used to be his friends. he said that the dream video was kinda meant to be the last time he gets involved with everything. he says that it feels incredibly childish and that he’s appalled that people are pushing 30 and are doing this. tommy said that he makes jokes about mega famous people being dickheads because it’s how he puts his feelings into words. he says that dream is one of the most self indulging person he has ever dealt with in his life and he cannot believe he’s been dealing with him for nearly 5 years- and he doesn’t not intend to continue dealing with him. he says he doesn’t find the whole situation funny anymore and he finds no joy in it- which he did during the logan and mizkif situations. he says that this is no way to live and it’s all pointless to be creating drama like this online and whenever he punches up he’s not trying to cancel anyone he just wants to make a joke. he again says that it’s all childish and that they’re both adults now

jack brings up that there’s no one sticking up for dream and how everyone on the server that has spoken up has disagreed with dream. jack says that a lot of them have felt this way for years- especially him

tommy said that he feels very manipulated by a lot of these people and that it took him a very long time to realize how manipulative some of these people were. he tells a story about when he was just starting out and he did the lobby spamming in a twitch streamers lobby the guy got super mad at him and invited him to call and proceeded to scream at tommy and called him the r slur (he was 20 and tom was 14) he said he was super shaken and messed up from it- but now he’s incredibly used to it and it’s such a shame that he is.

jack said that he started disassociating with dream after the grooming allegations because he didn’t want to be friends with someone who would privately message fans (which was the case). he said that he doesn’t like being grouped in with dream because of the dsmp because he’s bad for his image so he’s tried his best to make it clear that he doesn’t like dream and that’s about all he wants.

they then start talking about how out of the blue everything was. jack said that he would understand his involvement if they had been bullying dream relentlessly for weeks but they were literally talking about mizkif and xqc at the time and

jack said that he’s made his piece why he doesn’t like him and how you don’t have to look very hard to see the manipulative tactics to get people on his side. they both say it’s painful watching him do that. jack said that he’s going to continue making jokes about what dream accused him of because they’re so ridiculous.

tommy says that it’s sad that the only thing that dream took from tommy’s video was that he was lying. he says it’s sad to see everyone come out with there bad experiences with dream and he can’t believe it got this bad.

jack says it’s questionable that dream mocked jack for jack not liking him because of things he’s heard about him and he was gonna keep joking about eveything public about him because it’s funny. jack said that there’s enough that’s true that makes him not want to associate with dream.

tommy says that dream is an impossibly selfish man . jack said that the only thing he’s gonna give to dream is that he’s clearly incredibly socially unaware and genuinely does not understand what he’s done wrong- but that doesn’t excuse being a bitch. he says that people have tried to explain that to him but he just doesn’t get it. he also then asks how willing his misunderstanding is- because he most likely is aware of some of it. tommy says he lacks alot of empathy and doesn’t have guilt for the bad things he’s done. tommy says that it’s very easy to simply apologize but just keep doing the bad things and that’s what dream always does. tommy says he doesn’t take dreams apologies seriously anymore and he doesn’t forgive him.

tommy closes saying that he’s done with the drama and this is the last he will speak on it

[ew-selfish-art]

DpxDc AU: Tim as a child was never given a lot of information regarding the scribbling messy handwriting that appeared over night all over his arms- naturally he came to his own conclusions.

Tim Drake was home entirely alone at 9 years old and was about to go out for the night to test his brand new long exposure camera lens when he sees the writing on his arm. It’s not English, like he assumed it was at first, but it was using the alphabet to represent… Tim isn’t bad at math but this formula is complex for his little genius brain.

Looking at his camera, he decides he can spare a moment to look it up, solve it, and get back out into old town Gotham in time for Batman and Robin’s final patrol lap. He does just that, finding the problem to relate to some aerospace engineering and then quickly deduces what laws and theorems need to be applied. He finds a pen, writes down his findings in much neater handwriting onto his arm, and goes out. It’s barely a remarkable night at all. He gets a much more memorable photo of Robin roundhouse kicking a hench person.

Things just continued on that way. Tim would find some complex math, physics or chemistry prompt on his arm (surrounded by various question marks or notes or sad faces)- he’d answer it as best he could and move on with his life. Perhaps his parents were manifesting these pop quizzes? Perhaps his subconscious felt guilty about abandoning his studies for more Bat related pursuits? Tim really didn’t care to think much about it once he became Robin- there was too much on his plate and too many peoples problems for him to fix.

Notably, however, after the attack at the Tower, the pop quiz appeared and Tim wrote back that he wouldn’t be able to find an answer to this one. It was the only time Tim questioned the markings appearance and it was because the next thing that appeared was “Hope you feel better soon.”

… his parents wouldn’t include that on a pop quiz. Cursed then. Tim decided it must be a curse, whatever, he’d deal with the implications later in life.

Tim then has the worst year of his life, hes 15, no longer Robin and the questions from his curse are getting less math oriented and more… philosophical. A lot of mentions of death that, in hindsight helped him actually grieve, and a lot of theories about dark matter and souls. Tim answers back as best he can but he’s drained and his answers aren’t very good in his opinion. He gets minimal feedback.

It all comes to a point that he’s at a family dinner, Bruce is at the head of the table, Jason has promised just to stay for dessert, Damian hasn’t thrown a single insult his way and Steph was laughing at him- when a new theoretical model appears on his arm.

“You’re just as bad as Bruce, Timberly. Hiding a soulmate from all of us, how fucking typical.” Jason points out, while watching Tim scribble back some math with a question mark onto his arm.

“A what? No, this is just a curse. I get pop quizzes every now and then.” Tim bats away Steph who rapidly approaches and began to analyze his arm (the rest of the family isn’t far behind).

“Drake. Explain how you came to this conclusion.” Damian seems more curious than anything, if his lack of insults was anything to go off of.

“Since I was young I’ve had at least weekly math check ins, I never had a parent or anyone else around so I assumed my parents had me cursed to ensure I stayed on top of my studies. Sometimes it’s physics or chemistry, for a while there it was a ton of philosophy and behavioral psychology.” He shrugs his shoulders.

“Master Tim, I believe the lack of adults in your life has led you towards a false conclusion. That is most certainly a soulmate mark. The individual to whom you are responding is undoubtedly your other half.” Alfred attempts to calm the room before explaining to Tim. Tim isnt sure if he believes the butler, though Alfred only very rarely lied, so he grabs the pen once more. He writes his first question back: “Who am I to you?”

The room waits in anticipation and within moments a brand new line appears on Tim’s arm and he is vindicated: “We do math together???”

——

The reason Danny is failing English is because his built in homework helper sucks ass at metaphors and has apparently never read any classic literature. The tutor on his arm is great at puzzles and math tho.

Danny gets a reply back one night that he wasn’t expecting (Who am I to you?) and he mentions it to Jazz. Who goes insane that Danny didn’t even question it and just went with “meh, probably haunted” as his explanation for the phenomenon for all these years.

Apparently, if Jazz was right, he had a soulmate who was uh, super fucking smart. That was an overwhelming thought.

The next day Danny is in crisis mode and writes back “Wait, WHAT AM I TO YOU??? Can I help on your homework??”

Danny gets vindicated when the writing on his arm presents a shit ton of dates and information for an unsolved Gotham cold case. See, Haunted.

———

Eventually between Danny becoming the top candidate for astrophysics at Wayne Enterprises and Tim Drake being outed as having contributed tips to the GCPD that solved cold cases- they meet and realize just how dumb they’ve been.

[elysians-adventures]

༉‧₊˚. 𝐈. Part 1

masterpost

Being a kindergarten teacher, you have your fair share of troubles regarding loud kids. But you didn't realise that on this school trip, a certain someone will make you experience your worst fear in your entire teaching career.

5 kids + 1 manchild = chaos. This wasn't the brother of Yuuji Itadori you were expecting!

“Miss! Nobara stole my toy!” 

“No I did not! Shut up!” 

The wailing of children made you exasperated, watching Nobara's and Megumi's squabble before the class boarded the coach. The brown haired girl had stolen Megumi's dog toy, one of a pair. Your lips puckered, crossing your arms:

“Nobara, give it back. Remember what we said about taking things without permission?”

The little girl gave a whimper, glancing downwards with a look of guilt, “It's mean…” 

“And?” You asked, putting on your best teacher-sounding tone.

“...And if we want something, ask first~!” She repeated in a jingle, obviously something that you had instilled in your students' brains for some time.

Nobara looked to her right, turning to Megumi and stuttering out, “Can I play with it?” 

“No!” Megumi snatched the plush back, earning a scowl of disgust from the other child. 

“Meanie! Meanniee! Go away!”

You had been a kindergarten teacher for two years now, watching classes grow up and leave, but this was by far the most boisterous of them all. Nobara Kugisaki, Megumi Fushiguro and Yuji Itadori were all the resident troublemakers, though, speaking of Itadori– he didn't show up yet. You look around, trying to spot locks of pink hair within the sea of excitable children.

Last week, quite spontaneously, you had been told that there was a new parent chaperone joining the field trip; Yuji's older half-brother– Choso Kamo. Assuming that you hadn't seen anyone with pigtails with the little rascal alongside them, you assume they must be both running late. 

“Megumi, let that little brat play with the toy, both of you screaming is pissing me off,” a gruff voice spoke. You turned back to the arguing duo, noticing a newcomer patting– rather, manhandling Megumi's head. Toji Fushiguro. 

“But I don't wanna!”

“Do it, or I'll sell you.” 

The black haired child gave a groan, finally nodding to Nobara's request. Internally sighing, you gave a wry smile to Toji, trying to telepathically remind him not to swear around kids. He seemed to get the message, holding his hands up in false defence. 

“Whoops. I'll do better, Miss L/N,” he joked in a high pitch, earning an eye roll from you. 

You two had a close friendship, meeting each other in university and later named godmother of Megumi by his late wife (the man would never bother with sentimental stuff like that). 

“Have you seen Yuji? Or his brother? The coach leaves soon…” you shot the question towards Toji, who had also taken up the role of parent chaperone by Megumi's incessant requests (begging). 

“Yuji Itadori…?” He paused, thinking, before his face contorted into a laugh, “Oh! That kid! Nah. The one that plays with Megumi? I'm friends with his older brother, y’know?” 

“Oh?” You shot a questioning look towards the seeming off handed comment Toji gave. Choso didn't seem like the type of guy to keep Toji around as a friend, but you were always willing to be proved wrong.

“Yea. Goes to the same MMA club as me, shit guy. Probably running late, dick stuck in some bitch and forgot the time.”

You give Toji a hard elbow at his rather loud tone near the kids. He smiles, shrugging carelessly. Though, it did make you wonder, who exactly was he talking about? Yuji's older brother had always seemed like a well adjusted guy, if you ignored his tendency to act emo. And he was always punctual to stuff, so this situation made you slightly worried. Itadori had no trouble cheering up the entire class, his selfless nature not lost on you. Whoever raised him did an amazing job… 

“Should probably load these fuc– kids… onto the coach. Where's Nanami?” Toji looked around, before spotting the blond-haired teacher. He turned on his heel without a goodbye, walking towards him. 

Toji was right, it was getting late, the driver was probably irritated at the entire ordeal. You gave a sigh, hoping that the two finally would show up. 

You rolled your shoulders back, and raised your chin, standing tall.

Clap! Clap!

The storm of children grew silent at a moment's notice. 

“Good! Go to Mr. Nanami and sign yourselves in! Straight line, remember!” You gave them instructions, seeing them clamber towards the two chaperones. The line was not as straight as you'd hoped, but it was fine enough for a group of six year olds.

Now, onto the matter of the late chaperone and child. You grasped at your phone within your pocket, opening your contacts. As policy, or rather as common sense, you saved all the parents’ numbers onto your phone. You scroll until you find ‘Y’, scanning over the names. 

… ‘Yuji's Brother’

‘Yuji's Brother’

‘Yuko's Mother’ …

You frown, when were they two? Probably a glitch. You tapped into one of the names, waiting.

Ring ring. Ring ring. Ri–

“What?” The deep voice that responds makes you jump,  absolutely not what you were expecting. This absolutely was not Choso, unless he had a vocal chord surgery or something. In the background, there were sounds of humming cars. Traffic jam, perhaps? You try to maintain a level of professionalism.

“Hi, I'm calling regarding the school trip. I'm wondering–” you were cut off by a youthful voice. 

“Gaah– Sukuna! Hurry up! We're late! I'm sorry Miss L/N! Hurry up, hurry up!” Yuji's frantic tone makes you smile, the boy obviously panicked at the prospect of missing the thing he had been looking forward to for months. 

“Shut up! Fuckin’ bastard… yea, we're almost here.” The voice, which you took as ‘Sukuna’, mumbled in an annoyed tone. So this was Toji's MMA friend? You could tell why they were friends now. 

Thumping sounds were heard in the background, but you ignored them, continuing: “Well, I'm sure Yuji wouldn't like to miss the trip. The coach is leaving in a few minutes, but if you need more time I can talk to the driver for you. How far are you?”

“Stop kicking my seat, you little shit! We're five minutes away, just wait,” the last part was hissed in a commanding tone, a scowl unknowingly painting your face. You already didn't like him, and you were never good at hiding your emotions. 

“Well, alright, I'll call you back soon if you aren't here.” Not wanting to hear the rest of the sibling spat between them, you promptly hung up. The blatant swearing, insults, and punctuality. He was going to be worse than Toji. 

Instantly after the call, you tap onto your work email, trying to see whether there had been some mixup with the guardians. It wasn't a huge deal, Yuuji was going to get here regardless and the job was easy enough for a teenager if anything. You scroll down to the form submitted by Choso Kamo– only to find that he had pulled out at the last minute, being replaced by a ‘Sukuna R. Itadori’.

Groaning, you turned back to the group, who had been dwindling to around ten kids in line. 

“Nanami!” You called, “Can you tell the coach driver to wait a little longer?”

The pitiful look on your face managed to soften Nanami's stern gaze– though not fully. With tight lips, he gave a slight nod. Something told you that the five minutes were not so true. 

.

.

.

Fifteen minutes passed before a car pulled near the group. A black Toyota, its slick form resembling a teardrop. You watched as the backdoor flew open, Yuji Itadori beelining straight for you. Backpackless, and without a care in the world, he gripped onto the fabric on your legs as he neared. 

“Miss L/N!” He hugged your leg, “I'm sorry! Can I get on the bus–”

“Oi, brat!” 

Both of your attentions were pulled back towards the car, the happy reunion making you momentarily forget that there was supposed to be another different person here after all. 

A tall man emerges from the vehicle, a tiny Spiderman backpack slung over broad shoulders. Jesus, how tall was he? About six foot, you surmised. He donned a tight black vest, with matching grey zip up hoodie and sweatpants pulled over himself– obviously in a rush, considering the creasing. The man combs through pink hair with his fingers, giving you a glower.

He neared the pair of you, chucking the bag towards the smaller child. Yuji caught it, blowing a raspberry towards him… this was his brother, was it not? In reality, you had completely forgotten that Yuuji had an older brother directly related to him. You've gotten so used to Choso picking him up after school, you've just defaulted to him.

“Miss! ‘Kuna made me late! Blame it on him!”

“Now, now, it's alright. The coach hasn't left yet, but catch up with it now! Who knows, it might just drive off without you now…” You feigned a face of worry as you crouched to meet his height, looking towards Nanami. The smaller of the pink haired duo was alarmed, grasping his backpack and sprinting towards the teacher.

 He was too fast for a six year old, you knew that for sure. 

Standing to your full height, you face Sukuna, trying to ignore how you comically dwarfed him. Are you short because he was tall, or was he tall because you were short? Such philosophical questions were pushed to the back of your mind as you nodded for him to follow you to the coach. You earn a grunt in response, the muscle bound man starting to walk ahead of you.

 ‘Alright, you don't like to follow, noted…’ You think. 

Trying to make small talk on the thirty second journey, you decide to bring up Toji as a common interest: “I heard you go to the same fighting club as Toji. What was it, boxing?” You purse your lips, thinking. You messed up on purpose to see if that would strain any more conversation out of him.

“MMA,” he answered bluntly. A pause, nothing else came out of his mouth. 

‘Alright, the silent type, noted…’ You think.

The both of you arrive at the coach, the driver giving you the most piercing glare you might have ever experienced in your life. It almost made you shudder. Scanning over the bus, you make sure everyone's seated. You assumed Nanami had already checked the kid's seat belts with his methodical nature, but one more pass through couldn't hurt. Letting Sukuna figure out his own seating situation, you walk and check the seat belts until you make your way towards the back, seeing a specific trio fiddling with Yuji's seatbelt. 

“Ah, let me do it sweetie,” you took the seat belts and swiftly buckled it, patting it to signify the task was done. 

“Thank you, miss,” they hummed respectively. 

“You're welcome.”

You make your way back up the coach, looking now for free seats. Nanami was sitting alongside Junpei, trying to break up a squabble between him and Mahito. Toji was sitting in the only lone seat at the very front of the coach, scrolling on his phone. That left you… your eyes narrow. 

Next to Sukuna? You just hoped he wasn't one of those people that smelt when you got near them. You sat.

He wasn't, rather the opposite, a subtle cologne filling your senses. Although, his man spread did invade a bit into your space, so you tried to reclaim it by also man spreading– though not as blatantly. 

“This ’s to a museum, right?” He questioned, staring at his phone. Glancing at it, you see that he has a privacy screen. Considering the comment Toji had thrown out previously, maybe you didn't want to see what was on his screen.

“Huh? Yea, the national museum. They're all so excited,” you smile earnestly, “especially Yuji. He hasn't stopped talking about it since he found out.”

“Hm, ‘s that so,” he slurred out in response. 

‘Alright, the coach ride will be in silence then, noted…’ Your eye twitched. Could this guy at least act amiably? Discarding Yuji and Sukuna's brotherly relationship– which you expected would be at least rocky, it seemed there was not a bone of politeness in this man towards strangers. 

You could feel someone's stare on you, intense. Peeking around you, your sight finally landed on Sukuna's red irises boring through you. Did you fuck up somehow, and now he was going to fillet you using his MMA skills? You quickly break eye contact, internally sighing. 

Sinking into the leather-bound seat, you tried to distract yourself, choosing to think of all the mess the kids would make during the hour trip. How many would throw up?

.

.

.

Answer: one. 

Mahito must have fed Junpei something earlier, because the projectile vomit that came out of the poor kid was not natural in any sense of the word. You almost feared he'd straight up die. Soon calling his mother to pick him up, Yuji and Megumi said bye to their dear friend as he disbanded the bus. 

Nanami's pristine suit got, needless to say, utterly demolished. The teacher scrambled off the coach when they arrived, in search of an actual toilet in place of the coach's small dingy one to clean up at. If anything, though, it would be more beneficial to buy a new shirt. 

“Take care of them!” He bellowed as he rushed into a nearby bakery, trying not to pay mind to the dirtied water dripping down his shirt. 

“Okay!” 

Now, to get them off. A task easier said than done. 

Thankfully, most of them were capable enough to pry their seatbelts off of themselves, though one or two needed some help. 

“It's okay, sweetie, I'll do it.”

Yuji gave you a beam, “Thank y–”

“You can take your own seatbelt off, brat. Don't waste my time,” Sukuna's voice came from behind you, making you jump. Glancing at him, you could tell he was towering over the pair of you– arms crossed. 

“It's fine, Sukuna. Yuji's just tired from all that sitting, no?” You coo towards the boy, who nods vigorously. 

“Yea! I‘m tired!” Itadori fakes a yawn, and you pinch his cheek: “Let's not go overboard, now. Off you pop!” 

Yuji grabs Nobara and Megumi's hands, and rushes off the coach, barging past Sukuna. The action earns a giggle from you, not lost to Sukuna's death stare. 

“Let's get off before they all run away from Toji,” you hummed, trying to mutually make your way past Sukuna. He didn't let you pass, stocky frame blocking the way. 

You stand for a second, waiting for him to move, before you speak up, “Umm… excuse me.” Trying to slip past between the seats and him, he finally let you go with another hum, this time sounding a bit more pleased. You frown, what was that about?

Coming out of the coach, the children stand timidly at the side of it, Toji watching over them with a bored gaze.

“Y'know, Y/N, I regret this already. This shit is so boring,” he mutters under his breath as you approach. He turns to the other ‘parent’ chaperone, smirking, “I wish you were there last Saturday, y'know…” 

Tuning out of the conversation, turning to the kids. Their chatter filled the air, so you rolled your shoulders back ready to clap– 

“Oi, shut up!” Sukuna clicked his fingers alongside the bellow, and it all fell silent without a moment's notice.

What… What was this power? It took you months of training just for them to hear your claps and calls for order, but this outsider manages to silence your class at the click of a finger? You stood in awe. 

“Fall in line! Anyone out of it will get chucked in a dinosaur's maw, got it?”

As if choreographed, the children lined up perfectly. Not one shoe or hair out of place. You weren't sure if they knew what ‘maw’ meant, but you felt as if the message got through without problem. 

He nodded towards the line, passing you full responsibility now. Perhaps, you had underestimated him. You nod back in thanks, a small smile threatening to appear on your lips. Sukuna turns back without a welcome on his lips, looking unimpressed. 

“Alright, sweeties! I know you are all excited, but we have to enter the museum quietly, all right? After we all sign in, we'll wait for Nanami and split into groups. C'mon,” you go in front of the queue of children leading them in. 

They follow you in, followed behind by Sukuna and Toji still talking– which you humorously think they're a little too like ducklings following their mother. But that metaphor quickly fizzled out when you realised in this situation, you would be the mother. You could never imagine raising them…

The museum had tall roofs, and its pillars resembled an ornate grecian style. Arches weaved above the roof, supporting the building, the interior remaining the modest brown of the brick. 

The class looked up in childish awe, eyes shining at the gigantic structure, gazing up at the pterodactyl replicas hanging as if in flight. You manage to quickly check in with the receptionist, and were told that two extra tour guides were on their way.

Nanami soon came back with a new shirt, the plastic wire of the price tag still hanging from the collar. His face was still turned in the iconic stern look, a glint of disgust still evident from the twitch of his lip. 

“Groups of five, quickly,” he stated with mechanical efficiency, trying to split the class equally. Without turning, he addressed the adults, “I'll be taking a tour guide with me. Toji, take one too. Sukuna and Y/N will stay together. Take Yuji with you, or he'll run off.” 

You didn't even have time to argue back at the pairing, you opened your mouth and suddenly there was a group of toddlers grasping at your feet as if you were some sort of deity. You didn't even have to corral the kids, Nobara and Megumi staring up at you expectantly.

“Let's go, miss!”

“I want to see some Egyptian stuff!”

“Bleh! Boring… Dinosaurs!”

“Mummies! Mummies!”

“ ‘Kuna! Mr. Kento said: you AND miss!” 

Yuji was busy trying to pull Sukuna closer towards your shared group. He was quickly pushed off, Sukuna finally rolling his eyes and neared you keeping a few paces behind, his expression a mixture of boredom and (shared) irritation. You didn’t seriously have to spend the next two or more hours with this self-absorbed prick, did you?

“Okay, okay! We're going!" you finally managed to say, smiling despite the chaos unfolding around you. 

As the groups started moving, you noticed Nanami leading his group with his usual stoic demeanour, already taking over the guide's job and explaining the historical significance of the museum's layout. You almost felt bad at the despondent look at the tour guide’s face, pouting miserably as they followed Nanami around. 

Toji, on the other hand, seemed to have his hands full with a particularly energetic child who was attempting to scale his back onto his shoulders. You worried they were going to fall, but that wasn't an issue when he took hold of the kid by their collar accompanied with stern talking to. 

The museum had massive, great pillars at every corner with vast displays. There were sections which you methodically scoured through, first the Chinese artefacts, then the Egyptian– old kingdom and new kingdom split into two different rooms. 

You had spent a bit too long reading about a mummy pair, brothers from what the hieroglyphs were supposedly saying, too invested in your own world to realise it had gone scarily quiet. Too quiet for a group of children, nevertheless if that group contained Yuuji, Megumi and Nobara.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you rip your attention away slowly from the mud-stained coffins, as if you were trying to avoid seeing the scene in front of you.

 There were two reasons for this silence: someone had gotten hurt, or they all ran off. You especially hoped it wasn't the latter as Sukuna was meant to be watching them, and the register was meant to be done in time for lunch soon…

Your eyes come upon the second reason. Your small group of 5 disappeared into thin air. At least Sukuna seemed to be gone too, hoping that he had simply led them off into the new kingdom room. With a quickened step, you make your way across the hallway opposite.

Nothing.

What? Did they really leave you behind? Your lower lip protrudes as you're in thought, pacing aimlessly further down a corridor. Perhaps they have gone further down, one of them wanted to see dinosaurs, or something along those lines.

“You seen them?” A nonchalant tone asks, followed by a slurp.

“Have I…  seen them?” You spit back incredulously, your optimistic daydream of the pink haired bastard looking after the group quickly shattered like glass. He was standing next to a display of old Japanese artefacts further down, avoiding eye contact. Somehow, he found the time to pick up a drink at the museum cafe.  Thankfully, you hadn't picked up on this fact, or else you're sure you would have strangled him. 

“I thought you were looking after them,” Sukuna states, unbothered by the lazy look in his eyes. He gestures towards the exhibit he must’ve been distracted by, a large wooden sculpture of a god, “Kōmokuten, Heian era of Japan. Interesting?” The last part of the sentence was worded as a rhetorical question, followed by a nod by the man as if agreeing with his own statement. 

He continues: “Not interested? Anyway, where the hell are they? I thought you were looking after the–” 

“No, you were looking after them,” your angered whisper-yells were countered by a scoff by the pink haired man, sipping the beverage in his hand. You almost wanted to knock it clean out and pour it all over that stupid dyed hair. Actually… was it dyed?

Now that you think about it, Yuuji always seemed to have pink hair too, though the underside was brown. Did they have special brotherly hair dying sessions? 

“They’re kids, how fuckin’ far could they have ran?”

Tuning back into the conversation, it was your turn to scoff, “They're fucking kids! They could be on fucking Mars by now for all we know. Oh god, okay… let's follow the hallway down.” 

Attempting (but failing) to mask your worry, you bit your lip as you rushed past him and all the– truthfully interesting– exhibits. Another time, maybe. There was a loud slurp, before you heard thudding footsteps behind you. 

“Do you even know where you're going?” His gruff voice asks, you can feel his head peeking out from behind to look at the side of your face. 

“... Down there.”

“Stop. Fucking stop for a second, jesus. Let's look at a map of this place before you get us lost too.”

Sukuna grabs your shoulders, attempting to pull you back to the hallway you were previously. You wanted to spit some snarky comment about how you weren't going to be in this situation if it wasn't for him, but your tongue caught itself. 

You give in, sighing, and trace your steps back to a large display board. Right now, you were in the Japanese section, so if you followed it down– it split into two directions. Not so good. 

“They wanted to go see the dinosaurs,” you mutter to yourself in revelation, bending over to see the section on the board lower down. 

A loud sip, “Then let's go.”

You turn your head, ready to agree, until you see him nonchalantly texting on his phone. Your eye twitches.

“Put that away,” you hiss, uncaring to try to keep an air of friendliness, “You lost them and you can't even be fucking bothered to look. We have to get them back in at least–” you look at your phone, “-- at least the next 20 minutes. Can you please just help and not act condescending?” 

He switches his attention to you, his eyes glaring at you. Unmoving in his gaze, he raises an eyebrow. 

“Fine.”

“Thanks,” you spit out, full venom, obviously not thankful. Standing to your full height, you turn on your heel without caring whether the man was following you or not. But the thudding footsteps behind you signified as much.

You passed back by the Japanese displays, taking a cursory glance over them. Really, the statue Sukuna had tried showing you didn't pique that much of your interest. It looked rather, strange if anything. The man must have unique tastes. 

As you rush past them, you spot a certain black haired boy staring at a scroll– also from the Heian period. 

“Megumi!” You call out, relieved at having found at least one of the children. Sukuna grabs the boy's hand before you had the chance to scold him, and does your job for you:

“Who told you to run off, you brat?” He spits, crumpling the cup underneath his fingers. Megumi, unperturbed by the harsh words (perhaps training he had gotten from having Toji as a father), stared nonchalantly at the taller man. 

“They went to go look at the T-Rex, but I said I wanted to see this,” Megumi points towards the scroll, and you look to follow. Sukuna huffs, unsatisfied by the answer but knowing he isn't going to get much more tightens his grip around Megumi's hand.

“One down, four to go,” he glances at you with a humorous tone, but without a smile to match. 

You think it cute that Sukuna holds the little boy's hand in such a way, making sure he can't run off. He must be used to Yuuji's antics. Talking of Yuuji, Sukuna doesn't seem to be very nervous at all at the prospect of losing him.

“He's fine,” he states, sharp and short. The twitch in his brow isn't lost on you, however. Megumi yawns, trying to slip out of Sukuna's graso and back into your own– but the man pulls harshly, hissing. 

“Don't run again, jesus. These kids…”

With a smirk, you walk ahead of them, “They're probably running from you.”

–

Unfortunately, during your walk– halfway to the ‘dinosaurs’-- the three of you weren't able to spot any other lone children. Or rather fortunately, which indicated that they were still together. 

Sukuna had now resorted to letting Megumi piggyback him. The little boy rested his head against salmon-pink locks, eyes closed as if in dream. 

“Hey, why haven't you just called the museum staff?” The pink haired man asks, staring at you.

You blink, frowning. You can feel your cheeks burning up, the sensation uncomfortable, “It's embarrassing…” 

Your words were barely heard, so Sukuna furrows his brows: “Huh?”

“It's embarrassing,” you repeat, not daring to look behind you. 

There was a pregnant pause.

“Who the fuck cares about embarrassing?” He scoffs. 

“I do. It's my first proper trip and I've lost them. Plus, I know where they are! What's the big deal!”

Honestly, you don't believe your words. You knew kids, and you knew how small their 

attention span was. They could have already switched sections by now, or even wandered out. That sent a chill down your spine.

But for now, you were willing to hazard being irresponsible for the sake of your dignity. Not very good, is it?

 “At least it's like a… two minute walk,” you reasoned to yourself. Your steps hurried. In truth, if you didn't find them right now, you were willing to go straight for the intercom. Stupid you–

“Miss!” A higher pitched voice wailed out.

> part 2 (wip)

[novaursa]

Legacy (by his design)

- Summary: Tywin was the man who saved you from Robert's wrath. He was also the man who doomed you.

- Pairing: targ!reader/Tywin Lannister

- Rating: Mature 16+

- Previous part: union of fire and gold

- Next part: alliances

- Tag(s): @sachaa-ff @alyssa-dayne @oxymakestheworldgoround

The morning sun streamed through the high windows of the Great Hall, casting golden light across the breakfast table where you sat beside Tywin. The previous night’s events lingered in the minds of everyone present, each face reflecting varying shades of curiosity, jealousy, and silent calculation. Courtiers filled the hall, their attention turning occasionally to you, their whispers only barely hushed beneath the formalities of breakfast.

Across from you, Cersei sat poised, her lips curved into a small, disdainful smile as she regarded you. Her gaze was piercing, her presence radiating a tense resentment, as though she still struggled to reconcile herself to the reality of your marriage to her father.

“Sleep well, Lady Y/N?” she inquired sweetly, her voice dripping with false politeness. Her gaze didn’t leave you as she picked up her goblet, taking a leisurely sip, her eyes glinting with amusement as she waited for your reaction.

You met her gaze, entirely composed, refusing to let her bait unsettle you. “I did, Lady Cersei. Thank you,” you replied smoothly, your voice calm, betraying none of the previous night’s intimacy. “The chambers you so kindly prepared were most… accommodating.”

Cersei’s lips tightened ever so slightly, a flicker of irritation crossing her face. She forced a thin smile, tilting her head. “I’m so pleased you found them to your satisfaction,” she replied, her tone laden with unspoken meanings. “After all, we wouldn’t want you to feel out of place here, as you must have felt in the North.”

Tywin’s gaze flicked sharply to his daughter, a warning glint in his eyes. “Enough, Cersei,” he said, his voice quiet but steely, cutting through her thinly veiled hostility. “Our family is united now, and any divisiveness will only serve to weaken us.”

Cersei’s jaw tightened, but she inclined her head in acknowledgment, though her eyes still simmered with resentment. “Of course, Father,” she murmured, her tone respectful but laced with an edge she couldn’t entirely hide.

At that moment, Tyrion approached, his expression one of mild amusement as he took in the scene. He offered you a polite nod before turning his attention to his father, raising his goblet in a casual salute. “A rather lively breakfast,” he remarked, his tone light. “It seems marriage has already brought new… energy to the family.”

Tywin’s gaze shifted to Tyrion, his face unreadable. “Indeed, Tyrion. Which brings me to the matter of responsibilities.” His voice carried a note of finality that left little room for discussion. “I will be resuming my duties as Hand of the King immediately. Your own position in court, however, will change.”

Tyrion’s brows lifted, intrigued. “A change, you say? I can hardly imagine anything more… interesting than being the acting Hand, but I’m curious.”

Tywin’s gaze was cold, unyielding. “You will take on the role of Master of Coin,” he declared, each word sharp and definitive. “Your… particular skills should prove useful in managing the crown’s finances.”

Tyrion’s expression shifted, his amusement fading to something more thoughtful. “Master of Coin?” he repeated, an edge of intrigue and perhaps slight irritation coloring his tone. “Well, I suppose numbers and ledgers are better company than some of the members of this court.”

You hid a smile at Tyrion’s irreverent tone, catching his quick, mischievous glance in your direction. The humor in his eyes was unmistakable, and it was clear that, despite his apparent compliance, he saw this shift as yet another move in Tywin’s intricate web of control.

“Do you find the arrangement satisfactory, Tyrion?” Tywin asked, his tone carrying a veiled warning.

Tyrion gave a small, mock bow. “As satisfactory as any command from my dear father, of course,” he replied smoothly, though his eyes held a glint of defiance. “I shall endeavor to make the crown’s coffers flourish in ways previously unimaginable.”

Tywin’s gaze didn’t soften, but he nodded, acknowledging his son���s reluctant acceptance. “Ensure that you do. King’s Landing has become far too careless with its resources.” His gaze lingered on Tyrion a moment longer, as though daring him to argue, before shifting to you.

“You will come to understand that managing the affairs of this court requires… patience,” Tywin said, addressing you now, his voice low but intent. “Expect provocations, even from within our family.” His gaze flicked briefly to Cersei, a silent admonition that didn’t go unnoticed.

You inclined your head, meeting his gaze with calm resolve. “I understand, Lord Tywin,” you replied, letting your voice carry an edge of quiet strength. “And I am prepared to act accordingly.”

Cersei’s lips thinned, her gaze narrowing at the subtle alliance forming between you and Tywin. “A loyal wife, then,” she murmured, her tone as cold as the steel beneath her courteous facade. “How fortunate for you, Father.”

Tyrion hid a smirk behind his goblet, clearly relishing the tension sparking between you and Cersei. “Indeed, dear sister,” he quipped, his voice laced with amusement. “It seems we’re all learning the virtue of loyalty these days.”

Cersei cast a withering look at Tyrion, her patience visibly fraying. “Loyalty, Tyrion,” she replied icily, “is something neither you nor our new… stepmother would understand.”

You met her gaze without flinching, refusing to let her words unsettle you. “Loyalty, Lady Cersei,” you replied calmly, “is about dedication to the family’s strength. If that strength requires patience and endurance, then I am more than willing to provide it.”

Tywin’s eyes flashed with approval, and he gave a brief, almost imperceptible nod, as though silently affirming the truth of your words. He reached out, placing a steadying hand over yours on the table, a subtle but undeniable show of support.

“Precisely,” Tywin said, his voice cutting through the tension. “And let us not forget that unity is the foundation of our house.” His gaze swept over each of his children, lingering on Cersei before moving back to you. “We have much to accomplish. There is no room for petty rivalries.”

Cersei’s jaw clenched, but she inclined her head, hiding her frustration behind a forced smile. Tyrion, on the other hand, raised his goblet in a silent toast to you, his eyes twinkling with shared amusement. You returned his look, feeling the weight of the power dynamics in the room shifting around you, like pieces on a board carefully maneuvered.

Tywin sat in his solar, the golden afternoon light casting a warm glow over the rich furnishings as he reviewed a stack of parchment, each one detailing matters both great and small within King’s Landing and beyond. Satisfied with the steady progress of his plans and the recent events surrounding his new marriage, he leaned back in his chair, his expression one of reserved satisfaction.

A quiet knock sounded at the door, and without looking up, he spoke, his voice carrying authority. "Enter."

Petyr Baelish slipped into the room, his customary smirk in place, eyes bright with curiosity and the glint of ambition. He approached Tywin’s desk, giving a respectful bow before straightening, his fingers lightly clasped together.

“Lord Tywin,” he greeted, his tone deferential but carrying a hint of intrigue. “It seems congratulations are in order. A successful union, indeed. One that’s certainly stirred interest across the capital.”

Tywin’s gaze remained steady, unreadable, though he gave a slight nod of acknowledgment. “I trust you did not seek me out simply to offer congratulations, Lord Baelish,” he said, his tone clipped, laced with authority. “What do you wish to discuss?”

Baelish’s smirk widened a fraction as he inclined his head. “Always perceptive, my lord,” he replied smoothly. “In truth, I’ve been reflecting on this… union. I must confess, I find it a fascinating development. House Lannister uniting with the last Targaryen princess—it’s an image few would have predicted, especially given the history between your house and hers.”

Tywin’s expression didn’t waver, but a glint of satisfaction flickered in his eyes. “Curious as ever, I see, Lord Baelish,” he replied, his tone dry. “The union is advantageous to House Lannister. House Targaryen was but a shadow of itself—a name without strength. That name now serves my house.”

Littlefinger inclined his head, acknowledging Tywin’s logic. “A shadow, perhaps, but a shadow with an interesting past,” he mused. “I always found it curious how you managed to secure Lady Y/N’s safety during Robert’s Rebellion. Sending her to Winterfell of all places… an unusual choice. And yet, somehow, Lord Rickard Stark agreed to shelter a Targaryen princess amid a war he himself was embroiled in.”

Tywin’s gaze remained impassive, though his eyes narrowed slightly. “You’re not the first to wonder, Lord Baelish. However, the late Lord Stark was a man of duty. When presented with the safety of a princess, even one with Targaryen blood, he saw the importance of keeping her out of harm’s way.”

Baelish’s smile grew sly, his tone as smooth as ever. “No doubt, Lord Tywin. Though I can’t help but wonder what words you might have used to persuade him. After all, this was no ordinary princess… and it was hardly a time for compassion toward Targaryens, not after Prince Rhaegar… complicated things with Lyanna Stark.”

Tywin’s mouth tightened ever so slightly, though he maintained his composure. “Lord Rickard understood that politics and personal vendettas were separate matters. I simply reminded him of his duty as a nobleman—to protect those who could not protect themselves, even if they bore a name considered… unfavorable.”

Littlefinger chuckled softly, as though Tywin’s answer amused him. “Duty,” he murmured, as if tasting the word. “Ah, but I suspect your persuasion was… more nuanced than that, my lord. A quiet reminder, perhaps, that while Robert and the other rebels were keen on Targaryen blood, Lord Rickard’s house had enough to concern itself with. And that keeping Lady Y/N out of the capital may have served his own interests as well.”

Tywin’s gaze hardened, a flicker of irritation beneath his steady composure. “You seem very interested in matters long settled, Lord Baelish. Rickard Stark knew the costs and made his decision. I hardly expect to justify it now to those who had no hand in it.”

Baelish raised his hands in mock surrender, his smirk never fading. “Of course, of course. Merely curious, my lord. It’s rare to see such… foresight, after all, in dealing with such matters. Though I must admit, I find it impressive that you anticipated this marriage so far in advance. It seems the former princess has always been in your sights.”

Tywin’s eyes remained cold, though a faint, almost imperceptible smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Anticipation is key to securing power, Lord Baelish. Only a fool waits for opportunity to knock on his door.”

Baelish tilted his head, his eyes gleaming with interest. “And yet, here she is, no longer a princess, but Lady Y/N Lannister. A fascinating journey for her, wouldn’t you agree? From Winterfell’s ward to your bride… one might say she’s found herself at the center of power once again.”

“Her place was determined the moment she entered House Lannister,” Tywin replied, his voice carrying a finality that suggested he would entertain no further inquiry on the matter. “And she has taken to it with dignity and purpose, as I expected.”

Baelish smiled, dipping his head. “Well, Lord Tywin, I wish you all the best in your endeavors with Lady Y/N. It seems you’ve woven yet another thread into the ever-complex tapestry of this realm.”

Tywin regarded him coolly, his gaze penetrating. “See that you remember that this tapestry, as you call it, is mine to shape. And that includes any… threads of your own devising, Lord Baelish.”

Baelish inclined his head, his expression as smooth as ever, though a flicker of something unreadable flashed in his eyes. “Naturally, my lord,” he replied, his tone deferential. “I am, as always, at your service.”

With a final nod, Baelish turned and departed, leaving Tywin to his thoughts, a faint shadow of satisfaction lingering on the older man’s face. Tywin knew his plans were progressing as intended, and with each move, his power only solidified. One of the last Targaryens was now a Lannister, bound by marriage and duty—and the realm, whether they understood it or not, would soon feel the impact of his carefully crafted plans.

The memory came unbidden, rising to the surface of Tywin’s mind with the vivid clarity of a scene replayed countless times. He could feel the cold bite of the northern air, the damp chill settling into his bones even as he stood stoic, unmoved by the elements, on that neutral stretch of land between Riverrun and the Riverlands. Across from him, Lord Rickard Stark stood tall and silent, his eyes as sharp as the wind that whipped around them. His guards flanked him, their expressions impassive, yet Tywin could see the flickers of curiosity and wariness in their eyes.

Rickard’s gaze held a glint of suspicion as he studied Tywin, his lips pressing into a tight line. He’d been silent for some time, weighing the implications of Tywin’s request—the proposal that he take Princess Y/N as his ward in Winterfell, far from the tumult of King’s Landing and the wrath of Aerys II.

After a prolonged silence, Rickard finally spoke, his voice low and cautious. “I can understand why you’d seek to remove her from the Red Keep, given… recent events. But forgive my bluntness, Lord Tywin. Why Winterfell? Why me?”

Tywin’s face remained impassive, his gaze steady as he regarded the northern lord. “Because Winterfell is far from the reach of the Mad King,” he replied, his tone calm, each word deliberate. “And because you, Lord Stark, are a man of honor. I trust you to protect her without question.”

Rickard’s eyes narrowed, studying Tywin carefully, searching for the motives behind the Lannister’s practiced facade. “You speak of trust, Lord Tywin, but we both know there is little of that in the capital these days. And we both know your… proposal was once rebuffed by Aerys himself.”

A flicker of irritation crossed Tywin’s face, though he masked it quickly. “You are correct,” he admitted, his tone clipped. “Aerys, in his madness, saw fit to mock the prospect of a union between my family and his. He believed my ambition too great, and my family unworthy of House Targaryen’s blood. But his refusal only served to highlight his foolishness.”

Rickard arched an eyebrow, his expression skeptical. “So this is about vengeance, then? To deny Aerys something he could never foresee? To preserve what remains of his bloodline under your protection?”

Tywin’s gaze hardened, though he remained composed. “This is not about vengeance, Lord Stark. It is about survival. Aerys’s instability grows by the day, and I have no intention of allowing him to drag my family—or the realm—down with him. Princess Y/N deserves a chance at life beyond the twisted court of King’s Landing.”

Rickard considered this, but there was a glint in his eyes, a shrewdness that Tywin hadn’t expected. “And yet,” Rickard said slowly, “it seems to me that this is not merely about preserving her life. There’s more at play here, isn’t there, Lord Tywin?”

Tywin’s jaw tightened, his face an unreadable mask as he held Rickard’s gaze. “If you’re suggesting that I harbor… personal motivations, Lord Stark, then you are mistaken.”

Rickard’s lips curled into a faint smile, his eyes narrowing with a knowing look. “I’m not suggesting, Lord Tywin. I’m observing. This is no ordinary act of duty; there’s a fire in your eyes when you speak of her, even now. It is as though you would burn King’s Landing to ashes just to ensure her safety.”

Tywin remained silent, his gaze icy as he considered his response. He prided himself on his restraint, his ability to control both his emotions and his ambitions with an iron will. And yet, Rickard Stark had seen through him, glimpsed a part of him he kept hidden from all but the most guarded corners of his mind.

Rickard continued, his tone softened, but his gaze unwavering. “The Mad King’s rejection of your proposal wounded you more deeply than you admit, Tywin. Perhaps it’s pride, or perhaps… something more.”

Tywin’s silence spoke volumes, and Rickard watched him, waiting for a response. When Tywin finally spoke, his voice was steady, though his words carried a barely restrained edge. “Aerys’s refusal did not wound me, Stark. It only served to remind me of his unfitness to rule.” He paused, his gaze sharpening. “But yes, perhaps there is more to this than duty. Princess Y/N is… exceptional, and she deserves a place where she can flourish. If that place cannot be with me, then I would see her placed somewhere worthy of her.”

Rickard inclined his head, his expression softening slightly. “Then why send her to Winterfell, Tywin? Why choose isolation over influence? Surely, there are others who would shelter her—houses closer to the capital, houses with less… strained histories.”

“Because Winterfell is where she will be safest,” Tywin replied, his tone final. “The North may be isolated, but it is also steadfast. It stands as a bastion against the chaos spreading from the South, a place where loyalty and honor still hold meaning. I know she will be protected here, away from the eyes of those who would seek to use her for their own ends.”

Rickard was silent for a moment, absorbing Tywin’s words, a hint of respect flickering in his gaze. “Very well,” he said quietly. “I’ll take her as my ward. She will be as one of my own, safe within the walls of Winterfell.”

Tywin nodded, his relief hidden behind a stoic mask. “Then I will ensure her safe passage. She’ll travel under the protection of my men and reach you by the end of the month. Varys has assured me that he can facilitate her discreet departure.”

Rickard’s brow furrowed slightly. “And what of her future, Lord Tywin? What do you envision for her after her time in the North?”

Tywin’s gaze turned contemplative, his voice softening for a moment. “The future… is uncertain. But she will have one, thanks to your willingness to protect her.” He hesitated, a rare moment of vulnerability surfacing as he continued, “And perhaps, one day, our paths will cross again.”

Rickard watched him closely, a knowing smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Perhaps,” he replied, his voice carrying a note of understanding. “Though I suspect, Lord Tywin, that she’ll never truly be far from your thoughts.”

With that, the two men exchanged a final nod, sealing the agreement. Tywin turned, his expression hardening once more as he prepared to depart, but Rickard’s words lingered in his mind, echoing in the quiet spaces of his thoughts.

The Mad King’s rejection had stung, that much was true. But it was more than pride that drove him to protect Princess Y/N—it was a feeling he dared not name, a rare softness he kept buried, even as it quietly shaped his every decision. And so, with the cold northern wind at his back, Tywin returned to King’s Landing, knowing that one day, he would bring her back—and that nothing, not even a king’s madness, would prevent it.

The garden was quiet, a rare sanctuary within the walls of the Red Keep. The morning sun filtered softly through the canopy of branches overhead, casting dappled light over the winding paths lined with flowering bushes and ivy-covered stone. You found yourself breathing a little easier here, away from the prying eyes and the weight of expectation that seemed to follow you in every hall and corridor. It was a place where you could almost forget the politics and games, where you could meet Sansa as her family had once met you—as a friend and confidant, not as the Lady of House Lannister.

By your side stood Ser Barristan Selmy, his white cloak draped over his armor, his presence a reassuring strength as he watched over you. Tywin had personally appointed him to serve as your guard, an act that had stirred whispers throughout the court. But Barristan had accepted the duty with a solemn grace, his loyalty as strong now as it had been in the days when he served your family.

The old knight turned to you, his gaze softening with a hint of nostalgia. "You look at ease here, my lady," he observed quietly, his voice warm with something akin to affection. “The gardens… remind me of your mother. She would often seek out quiet places like this.”

You smiled, touched by his words. "Thank you, Ser Barristan. I find it hard to feel truly at ease within these walls, but here… it feels a bit closer to home." You paused, glancing around at the greenery that softened the stone fortress. “It’s peaceful. It makes the past seem… not so distant.”

Barristan nodded, his eyes growing distant as he reminisced. “Your mother, your brother… they both had a way of bringing light wherever they went, even in the darkest of places.” He met your gaze, his expression serious. “I swore an oath to protect you all those years ago. And though the world has changed, I intend to keep that oath. Your father would be proud of you, my lady.”

A warmth filled your heart at his words, and you reached out to gently touch his arm. “Thank you, Ser Barristan. Knowing you’re here brings me comfort. My family is gone, but you… you keep their memory alive.”

Before Barristan could respond, a soft voice called your name. You turned to see Sansa approaching, her steps tentative but her eyes bright with a mixture of hope and relief. She wore a simple gown of pale blue, her red hair catching the sunlight as she moved, a fragile beauty tempered by the shadows of what she’d endured.

"Sansa," you greeted warmly, opening your arms as she reached you. She stepped forward, allowing you to embrace her, her arms wrapping around you tightly, as if seeking solace in your presence.

“It’s so good to see you,” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper.

You held her for a moment longer, a quiet strength passing between you before you stepped back, keeping her hands in yours. “I thought we might speak more openly here,” you said softly, gesturing to the secluded spot beneath a flowering tree. “Away from prying ears.”

Sansa nodded, casting a cautious glance around the garden, and you guided her to a stone bench, gesturing for Barristan to give you some distance. He took a respectful step back, his presence still within sight, yet far enough to allow for a private conversation.

Settling onto the bench beside her, you looked into Sansa’s eyes, your gaze warm and steady. “Tell me, Sansa… how are you, truly?”

Her composure wavered, and she lowered her gaze, her fingers fidgeting with a loose thread on her dress. For a moment, she was silent, gathering her thoughts, and when she finally spoke, her voice trembled with a mixture of pain and weariness.

“I… I don’t know how to answer that,” she admitted, her voice barely audible. “Every day feels like… like I’m holding my breath, waiting for something to go wrong.” She glanced up at you, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “It feels like I’m trapped, like there’s no way out.”

You reached over, gently placing a hand over hers, giving her a silent reassurance that you were listening, that you understood.

“There are times,” she continued, her voice breaking slightly, “when I think of home… of Winterfell. I close my eyes, and I can almost feel the snow, hear the sounds of the wolves. But then I open them, and I’m back here… alone, surrounded by people who see me as… as nothing more than a pawn.”

Her words hung in the air, a painful truth spoken with quiet resignation. You could see the toll it had taken on her, the way she seemed smaller, more fragile, as though the weight of her circumstances had pressed down upon her spirit.

“Sansa,” you said softly, squeezing her hand. “You’re not alone. I’m here, and I will do everything in my power to protect you. You are not just a pawn to me… you’re family. And family means something.”

A tear slipped down her cheek, and she brushed it away quickly, her gaze filled with a flicker of hope. “Thank you,” she whispered. “But… I don’t know how much longer I can endure this. Joffrey… he’s… cruel. I thought I knew what cruelty was, but he—” She broke off, her voice trembling with fear and anger. “Every moment I’m near him, I feel like a lamb before a lion.”

You felt a surge of anger on her behalf, a fire kindling within you as you looked at her. “Joffrey is a monster,” you said quietly, your voice filled with conviction. “And he’ll answer for his actions, one way or another. I will see to that.”

Sansa’s eyes widened, a mixture of hope and uncertainty flickering within them. “Do you really believe that?”

You nodded, your gaze steady. “Yes. He is not untouchable, Sansa. Remember that. And until then, you must hold onto your strength, even if it feels impossible. Your family is known for its resilience, its loyalty. You carry Winterfell with you, even here in King’s Landing.”

She managed a faint smile, a glimmer of the strength that lay dormant within her. “I want to believe that… to believe that there’s a part of me that’s still strong, still a Stark.”

You reached up, gently brushing a loose strand of hair from her face. “You are a Stark, Sansa. You may not feel it now, but the blood of your family runs through you, fierce and unbreakable. And one day, you will find yourself again. Until then, lean on those who care for you. You’re not alone.”

Sansa suddenly lowered her gaze, a faint blush coloring her cheeks as she let out a soft sigh. “I’m sorry… here I am, pouring my heart out, when you’re the one married to Tywin Lannister,” she murmured, her voice laced with guilt. She glanced up, her blue eyes wide with concern. “Has he… has he hurt you?”

You felt the weight of her worry and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, offering a small, reassuring smile. “Sansa, don’t worry about me. I know how to handle Lord Tywin,” you replied softly, your voice steady. “It’s not easy, no. He’s a difficult man, but he’s… fair, in his own way. He values strength and purpose. He’s not cruel like Joffrey.”

Sansa’s brow furrowed, her fingers twisting the fabric of her dress. “I just can’t help but worry. You’ve always been so kind, so gentle. And Tywin… he’s…” She trailed off, as if struggling to find the right words.

You chuckled lightly, brushing a loose strand of hair from her face. “I assure you, Sansa, I am not as helpless as I may seem. The North taught me resilience, and that is something even Lord Tywin respects. He knows I’m not someone who can be easily broken or swayed.”

A small, grateful smile touched her lips, but her expression turned pensive, her gaze drifting as though lost in thought. “I think… I think Jon will be angry,” she murmured, her voice soft, almost wistful. “Once he hears what the Lannisters have done to us—to you.”

The mention of Jon stirred something deep within you, a warmth mixed with a pang of longing. Memories of Winterfell, of Jon as a small boy with wide, curious eyes, came rushing back to you—the boy you had taken under your wing, who looked up to you with trust and affection. You had been more than a guardian to him; you had been a mother, a protector.

“Jon…” you echoed, a faint smile crossing your lips. “He would be furious, wouldn’t he?” You could almost picture it: Jon’s jaw set in that stubborn way of his, his eyes dark with determination. “He has always been fiercely protective.”

Sansa nodded, her expression softening with a hint of fondness. “He adored you. You were the one who took him in when no one else would… When Father brought him home, Mother was… angry, but you didn’t hesitate. You cared for him as though he was your own.”

You met her gaze, a touch of sadness in your smile. “Jon was never a stranger to me, Sansa. I didn’t see a bastard or a complication. I saw a child, one who needed love and guidance. Winterfell taught us loyalty, honor, and kindness. He deserved that, no matter what anyone else thought.”

Sansa’s eyes shimmered with emotion, and she reached for your hand, squeezing it gently. “He’ll be forever grateful for that. I think… I think he misses you as much as he misses Winterfell.”

The thought of Jon, alone somewhere in the world, perhaps at the Wall as Eddard had once intended, filled you with a longing you had long buried. “I hope he knows he was always loved,” you murmured, your voice thick with unspoken memories. “That no matter where he goes or who he becomes, he’ll always be a part of me… a part of our family.”

Sansa nodded, her expression softened by understanding. “If there’s anyone who taught him love and loyalty, it was you. He’s stronger because of it. And I think… one day, he’ll find his way back to us, somehow.”

The two of you sat in a comfortable silence, the sounds of the garden enveloping you, as the unspoken connection between you—your shared love for the family you’d left behind—settled between you. You felt a renewed sense of purpose, a reminder that despite the path your life had taken, you still held onto the values of the North, onto the bond with those you loved.

Squeezing her hand, you offered her a small, reassuring smile. “We’ll hold onto that hope, Sansa. We’ll carry Winterfell with us, even here in King’s Landing. And together, we’ll survive whatever comes our way.”

Sansa’s smile held a glimmer of strength, her eyes bright with the quiet resilience she was beginning to rediscover. “Yes… we will.”

Jaime found Tyrion lounging comfortably in one of the lesser-used rooms of the Red Keep, a glass of wine in his hand and an amused expression on his face as he looked up, noting his brother’s approach.

“Tyrion,” Jaime greeted, taking a seat opposite him and reaching for a goblet of his own. He poured himself a drink, his gaze thoughtful as he swirled the wine. “You seem particularly cheerful today.”

Tyrion grinned, raising his goblet in a mock toast. “How can I not be? The prospect of our father producing little silver-haired Lannisters, complete with violet eyes, is amusing beyond measure.” He took a sip, smirking as he watched Jaime’s reaction. “Imagine—our own half-siblings, Targaryens by blood, yet Lannisters by name.”

Jaime chuckled, though there was a hint of unease beneath his mirth. “The image is almost absurd, isn’t it? To think of Father raising a child who resembles a Targaryen rather than himself.” He shook his head, a wry smile tugging at his lips. “But honestly, I’m more curious about how we managed to bring her here in the first place.”

Tyrion raised an eyebrow, his interest piqued. “Oh? I thought she’d been brought directly to Harrenhal.”

Jaime leaned back, folding his arms as he watched Tyrion carefully. “Not exactly. According to the reports, she was intercepted by our men as she traveled south, near High Heart.”

Tyrion’s eyes sharpened, his gaze turning contemplative. “High Heart? That’s an unusual route… Avoiding the main roads, no doubt, to keep a low profile.” He took another sip of wine, his expression thoughtful. “Why would she be traveling alone, and so far from any known strongholds?”

Jaime shrugged, though his expression betrayed his curiosity. “That’s precisely what I was wondering. She’d been staying far from the usual paths, as though she knew someone might be tracking her. It was only a stroke of luck that our men happened upon her party in the first place.”

Tyrion tapped his fingers thoughtfully against his goblet, his mind working through the implications. “She must have known, then. Known that someone—either Father or one of his allies—would be looking for her. Perhaps she thought she could outrun us or evade our scouts by staying off the roads.”

Jaime tilted his head, his eyes narrowing. “Or perhaps she had her own purpose. High Heart is a place of old magic, or so the tales say. There’s talk of visions, of those who are touched by prophecy.” He paused, his voice dropping slightly. “Why would she go there?”

Tyrion’s smirk faded, replaced by genuine intrigue. “Perhaps she sought counsel,” he murmured, his voice almost to himself. “Some advice from those who can see beyond what the rest of us can.” He looked up, meeting Jaime’s gaze with newfound interest. “If she’s spent time at High Heart, she’s no mere play peace being moved at our father’s discretion. She’s gathering knowledge, perhaps even positioning herself.”

Jaime’s gaze was steady, contemplative. “If that’s the case, then Father might be in for more than he bargained for.” He looked down at his wine, his expression thoughtful. “She could be a more complex player in this game than he realizes.”

Tyrion chuckled softly, though there was an edge to his laughter. “It seems our new stepmother might have ambitions of her own, ones that extend beyond being Lady of House Lannister. Father may think he has her in hand, but the blood of House Targaryen is not easily tempered.”

Jaime nodded, his expression solemn. “True enough. But there’s something about this that doesn’t sit right with me, Tyrion. Father’s convinced that she’ll submit, that she’s a pawn willing to play her part. But if she was willing to risk the dangers of High Heart, of traveling alone… then perhaps she’s not as willing to be controlled as he believes.”

Tyrion’s smile returned, a touch of admiration flickering in his eyes. “Perhaps she has her own plans, then. Plans that might even rival Father’s. I must say, I find the idea rather… refreshing.” He tilted his goblet in Jaime’s direction. “To a stepmother who might keep even our dear father on his toes.”

Jaime raised his own goblet, a shadow of doubt lingering in his gaze. “To our Lady Y/N Lannister. May she prove as unpredictable as the storm she’s brought into our family.”

They clinked their goblets, the quiet clinking of glass a subtle acknowledgment of the complexity that had settled into their family, brought about by the union their father had so carefully engineered.

At Castle Black, the cold wind swept through the narrow corridors as Jon Snow made his way to Maester Aemon’s chambers, the sealed raven scroll clutched in his hand. The morning had dawned gray and bleak, and the chill in the air seemed sharper than usual, biting into his skin even through his cloak.

When he entered, he found Maester Aemon seated by the fire, his milky, sightless eyes gazing into the flames, as though he could see something far beyond them. Despite his blindness and frailty, the old maester held a dignity and presence that commanded respect. Jon cleared his throat gently, announcing his arrival.

“Jon,” Maester Aemon greeted, a soft smile creasing his ancient face. “Come, sit with me. I sense you have news from the realm.”

Jon approached, pulling out the small stool beside the maester and handing him the sealed scroll. “A raven came from the capital,” he said, his voice low, the words heavy in his mouth. “It’s… recent news.”

Aemon turned his head slightly toward him, reaching out his frail hand. “Good. Open it, if you will, and read it to me,” he instructed, his voice calm but eager.

Jon broke the seal, his eyes scanning the contents of the letter quickly, but the moment he reached the heart of the message, his breath caught. His eyes widened in disbelief, his heart pounding as he read and re-read the words before him. “No… it can’t be,” he murmured, anger and shock simmering beneath the surface.

“Jon?” Maester Aemon prompted gently, his brow creased in concern. “What is it? What news from King’s Landing?”

Jon’s voice was thick with restrained fury as he continued, his hands shaking slightly. “It says… that Lady Y/N Targaryen has been wed to Tywin Lannister.” He forced the words out, his voice tight. “She… she married him.”

Aemon was silent for a moment, his sightless eyes reflecting the light of the fire. Finally, he sighed, a sound laced with an old sorrow and a weary understanding. “Continue, Jon. There may be more,” he urged softly, though he clearly sensed the gravity of the news already.

Jon swallowed hard, glancing back at the letter, his anger simmering with each word. He continued, voice taut, “It says she was received in King’s Landing as Lady Y/N Lannister, to be seated beside Tywin at the high table. The realm… they call it a powerful alliance, one that will ensure House Lannister’s influence.” He nearly spat the words, his jaw clenched. “It’s… it’s disgusting.”

Maester Aemon sat in silence, absorbing Jon’s words, his face unreadable. After a long pause, he spoke, his voice heavy with understanding but also sadness. “Her destiny has been twisted to serve another’s ambition,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. “But… I cannot say I am surprised.”

Jon looked up, frowning. “What do you mean, Maester?”

Aemon’s sightless eyes were distant, as though looking back through the years. “This… marriage is not the first time Tywin Lannister sought a union with her bloodline.” He sighed, his frail hand resting on the arm of his chair. “Many years ago, before Robert’s Rebellion, Tywin asked for her hand from King Aerys—to bring their houses together in alliance. Tywin saw strength, ambition, in her blood… but Aerys, in his madness, mocked the offer.”

Jon’s fists clenched, his voice tight with anger. “So that’s why she was sent away? Why she had to grow up in Winterfell, with no family of her own?” He shook his head, struggling to contain his rage. “And now they’ve… forced her into this. She doesn’t belong with them, with those—those Lannisters.” His voice was thick, barely restrained, a mixture of fury and protectiveness.

Aemon’s face softened, a trace of empathy crossing his ancient features. “Yes, Jon. That rejection sent ripples through the years. And now, fate has come full circle in a twisted way. Tywin has finally achieved what he sought back then, though in different form.”

Jon shook his head, his voice breaking slightly. “She was… she was like a mother to me, Maester. When no one else would, she cared for me, treated me like family. And now they’ve made her… into this.”

Aemon reached out, his hand trembling as he placed it over Jon’s clenched fist, his touch gentle, his voice filled with quiet strength. “Jon, remember… she is strong. Her blood is ancient, powerful. The blood of Old Valyria, of dragons. She has endured much already. Do not underestimate her strength, even in this.”

Jon’s gaze dropped, his voice barely above a whisper. “But it doesn’t feel right. She shouldn’t be forced to endure… to be bound to someone like him. After all she’s done for me, for all of us.”

Aemon nodded slowly, his expression resigned but compassionate. “Life often forces us into roles we do not choose, Jon. It’s a truth I have learned over many long years.” He took a deep breath, his tone laced with sadness. “Perhaps this marriage is a fate she did not want, but remember this—she is more than that. Her strength is her own. She will endure, as she always has.”

Jon closed his eyes, his mind racing with memories of you, the woman who had shown him kindness when he’d been a child alone in Winterfell, the one who had offered him understanding when he felt like an outsider. The thought of you in King’s Landing, surrounded by the Lannisters, weighed on him like a stone.

After a long silence, he finally spoke, his voice hoarse. “If they hurt her… if they make her suffer…”

Maester Aemon’s hand tightened slightly on his. “Jon, you must let her walk her own path. She has made her choices, and we can only hope she finds peace within them. Our duty here… remains with the Night’s Watch.”

Jon nodded slowly, the anger still simmering beneath the surface, but he forced himself to accept the old maester’s words. “I know, Maester,” he whispered, his voice thick. “I know.”

And as he rose to leave, he couldn’t shake the image of you—strong, resilient, and yet so far from the place where you belonged. The thought stayed with him, a heavy burden he carried silently, as he walked back through the cold halls of Castle Black

[cometiny]

I finally finished these!

They're inspired by inside out but I split up logic instead of feelings :3

Here's some info on each of them:

Imagination (or "Mage" for short) is the star of the logic department. nothing would really work if she wasn't there to connect the dots. and since she's the only one of them capable of creating something new, I thought a witch design would really suit her. plus a witch hat always creates an unmistakable silhouette. She's white to represent a blank slate, and the other colors are close to the cmy primary colors cuz she can imagine almost anything using just a few foundational ideas :3

Interest is a curious little guy who is delighted by all things new, and unfamiliar, so I thought the alien thingies would be a cute way to represent that. He looks like a little kid bc kids love asking questions, much like he does! He loves to learn things but his attention is often split between too many things at once, and he needs the others to guide him to what he should focus on.

Evaluation (or "Eve" for short) is very put together, practical and serious, though the cape also hints at a more adventurous side, which shows her openness to new paths. Her overall appearance may seem stoic but all her clothes are quite floaty, as she's willing to consider all the options before making a decision

Bias looks like an imp cuz they're the little bug in ur brain that tells you to prioritize yourself, and she keeps track of personal goals (albeit not always long term goals.) They will often propose certain ideas and beliefs as truth, simply because believing it would be beneficial, without much regard for weather or not it's actually true.

Knowledge is the most stoic of them all. she's all facts and no bullshit. she's a bit of a housewife bc she has to maintain all the knowledge in order and clean up facts that turn out to be false while adding and sorting all the new stuff. Her input is usually dry, but it helps keep the others on track.

Doubt is responsible for sorting out disposable influences. if interest is the one to ask for an answer, her job is to question the answer, and make sure the new information is reliable enough to hold on to.

intuition is often hard to read. she's mysterious and elusive, yet wise beyond comprehension. she's a bit like royalty, as she has a lot of power in the mind, yet no one dares to really question her. It is usually assumed that there is truth in her input, even if her riddles are hard to interpret sometimes.

Reflection is like a ghost, always looking to the past, and making sense of the world retroactively. She's responsible for aligning the new with the old, and painting a picture of how things are by understanding how they (seemingly) have always been.

Perception (or "Pepper") is just a fun guy living in the moment. they're a sensory seeking type, while not doing much thinking. they kinda just walk around stating the obvious, but you'd be surprised how often that comes to use when the other guys start over-analyzing and over-interpreting everything. Much like Knowledge, Pepper also helps keep everyone on track with reality.

[grandline-fics]

Immune To Your Charms

DESCRIPTION: Soulmates are incapable of harming the other in any way. Normally that would be a good thing but not when you're meant to be enemies.

WARNINGS: It's Doflamingo so it features mentions of killing/ description of injury/ general violence. Some minor fluff and minor suggestiveness(maybe?) Soulmate! AU, Enemies to Lovers

CHARACTERS: Doflamingo

WORDS: 3,922

A/N: Part of the Good For Your Soul Series. I'd gotten sick there for a couple weeks so here's a longer chapter to make up for it all. Things are happening now even just a little but hopefully you all like how it's going.

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

DIRECTORY | PROMPT LIST

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five (here) | Chapter Six |Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight | Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten | Chapter Eleven | Chapter Twelve | Chapter Thirteen | Chapter Fourteen(coming soon)

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Doflamingo felt a rush of triumph flood his body as he grinned widely at the sight of you falling to the ground under the impact of his hand striking you sharply across the face. He relished the yelp of pain and the thud as you slumped against the wall. Even better was the sight of your cheek already bruising from his strike and the trickle of blood slowly dripping from your trembling lips. Your defiant gaze and furious glare remained in place, only heightened now by the shine of unshed tears. With a building chuckle Doflamingo raised his hand with exaggerated slowness and arched his fingers, summoning his strings to attach themselves to your wrists, wrapping so tightly that faint red lines appears against your previously unmarked skin and dragged you against your will until you stood. Adding insult to injury, you were pulled higher until you were dangling in the air and eye-level with him. Another flick and twitch of his fingers and new strings began to slide around your throat, getting tighter and tighter and-

The sound of footsteps against the polished floors outside his office made Doflamingo snap out of his daydream and he glared heavily at the disruption. Whoever that was was going to pay severely for their inability to walk quietly. Slamming his hand on the desk he rose sharply and stormed towards the door, throwing it open and freezing to see you walk by at the right moment. You stopped and tilted your head at him, turning to face him properly as you slowly analysed his tense body and abrupt appearance. Condescendingly you pouted at him. “Aww what’s wrong? Were you hoping I was a defenceless servant to attack?” You asked, the mock concern in your voice thick and smug. “Really my heart’s breaking for your troubles.”

“Yeah, you really look it.” Doflamingo grinned, lowering his arm from its coiled position that had been ready to attack. “And what have you planned for today? Besides strutting about my palace?”

“Oh well I do have a large block of strutting scheduled for today, can’t be avoided.” You explained in false severity. “In between I have a packed diary of meetings and galas. You know how it is.” Doflamingo chuckled at your casual sarcasm. You’d been here for a week already and he still found it a strange mix of aggravating and refreshing to be spoken to the way you did. Even those in his family restrained their tongue in some capacity with him or they regarded him with a small flicker of fear combined with their undying adoration for him. Not you though, you held no fear for him. He watched as you slowly craned your head to look beyond him and into the office, in search of something or someone only to see it was empty. “Well what got you so homicidal this time?”

“You.” Doflamingo answered smoothly. He didn’t feel any need to hold back, instead he waited until you straightened and met his gaze once more before going into further detail. “Your footsteps interrupted the enjoyable daydream I was having about being able to hurt you.”

“Aww had I known I would have interrupted you sooner.” You grinned, not at all surprised. “Was I crying? Begging?”

“No, you were too busy being strangled by my strings to make a noise.” You eyed Doflamingo as he took a step closer towards you, his fingers reaching out to lightly move across your throat, the image of the thin deep red lines digging into your soft skin still fresh in his mind. 

“Fun.” You chimed in, lightly swatting his hand away with ease. “In my daydreams your drowning very slowly.” Doflamingo’s grinned widened significantly at your own confession. How strange to think that other soulmates in their existences must have had sweeter or more intimate daydreams about the other half of their pair, not the ways they’d harm the other like you and he did. 

Behind his red tinted glasses he watched you walk away from him, only turning to step into his office again when you’d disappeared around the corner. As he did so he paused to see Violet a few feet away, watching him intently. He knew that look and rolled his eyes, silently signalling for her to enter his office and even left his door open while he moved lazily to his desk. Doflamingo waited for the sound of Violet closing the door behind her before he looked up to see her approach. “What’s troubling you?”

“It’s not going to work out the way you’re hoping it is.”

“What isn’t?” He asked, leaning back in his seat and propping up one of his feet onto his knee. “I have a lot of things going on. You’re going to have to be specific.”

“You won’t be able to harm them. Ever.” Violet statement was firm and it made him cock his head slightly to the side, grin dropping just a fraction. “Nothing you’ve tried has worked so far and nothing you try in the future will work. Soulmates can’t harm one another regardless of their feelings for each other.”

“There’s a first for everything Violet and you know better than anyone that I always succeed once I set my mind to it.”

“Then perhaps this is the first time that you fail?” She suggested, her eyes steeling slightly as the true nature of the former Princess began to draw itself out from under her pretence of being his loyal officer. “I peered at your souls just now as you conversed. The connection has deepened since that first day you learned the truth. In spite of the cruel words and murder attempts the longer you two are in proximity the stronger that bond is getting.”

“Why are you telling me that, Violet?”

“Just letting you know what to expect so that down the line you can remember that I told you so. You should do the right thing for once and distance yourself from them now. Let them go and have some semblance of a life instead of being stuck here because you refuse to accept they are the one person you can’t kill.”

“They aren’t going anywhere Violet.” Doflamingo all but growled, his expression darkening. 

“Getting possessive?” Violet asked unable to hide the small smile twitching at her lips as she turned and headed for the door. “Fine. Just remember I warned you.”

———-

Doflamingo had intended to not let Violet’s words strike a nerve but it did. He’d declared from day one that you weren’t going anywhere because he refused to let you be at risk of meeting your end by any other means than his hands. Her assessment that the the longer you two were in each other’s direct presence ensured the bond as soulmates would strengthen also annoyed him. Would new ‘side effects’ occur over time too? Would he be incapable of saying an insult in case it technically counted as hurting your feelings? Angrily he ran his hand through his hair and glared out the window, watching the lights of the streets and houses in the city below break up some of the night’s darkness. Doflamingo scowled at the complication of it all and his mind began to drift back to his intention to draw out stronger emotions from you, to at least make you break in some capacity. If even that possibility was at risk of being taken from him, he became resolved to do that now.

Turning sharply he left his bedroom and made his way down to the corridor your living quarters were at. Grinning, he pulled out his gun and unloaded the full chamber into the ceiling, the gunshots echoing loudly just outside your door. He chuckled at the sound of movement from inside your door. The door to the bedroom opened and you appeared, your face scrunched in sleepy confusion. A long yawn built in your chest as you looked around only to groan at the sight of Doflamingo grinning at you. “Guns again?” You asked with another yawn, trying to rub the sleep out of your eyes to focus on him properly. Slowly you looked at your door to see there weren’t even any bullet holes. “Where did you aim?” You followed Doflamingo’s finger as he pointed up and now you were really confused. “What are you planning?”

“I decided you don’t need to sleep.” He explained with a shrug.

“You’re trying to see if you can kill me through sleep deprivation?” You asked groggily, leaning against your doorframe. Honestly Doflamingo hadn’t considered that, he was just set on seeing if he could torment you. Still he said nothing, now liking this possible solution to the problem. “A little unconventional but I guess it could work? But you know I’m not going to go along with that willingly? I like my sleep too much. So how do you plan on ensuring I don’t sleep without putting your own at risk of your own rest?”

“Oh I have my ways.”

“Without using servants or your fan club?”

“Family”

“Fanclub.” You repeated with a sleepy grin. “Because if they have a hand in keeping me awake then isn’t that the same as my idea of just getting someone to kill me on your behalf?”

“Like I said, I’ll find a way.” Doflamingo chuckled before turning and walking away, now having to start planning. The sound of gunfire tore through the air once more and Doflamingo stopped and looked at the floor. The bullets meant for him lying at his feet. Slowly he turned to see you pointing your own pistol at him. “Now where did you get that?”

“I have my ways too.” You answered before going back into your room. Doflamingo laughed and continued down the corridor. He’d let you have tonight to actually rest.

———-

For the next three days Doflamingo was true to his word and found a way to be responsible for keeping you awake. During the day when you had left your room he’d infiltrated a countless amount of alarm clocks into your quarters all set at specific times so you would woken and have no choice but to get out of bed to find the right one and turn it off. Then when he realised you were starting to find places to sneak off to and nap during the day he intervened by finding you and waking you. This time he found you in one of the libraries, curled up on one of the sofas and sleeping. With a curious tilt of his head he hummed to himself and grabbed the nearest vase of flowers, dumping the flowers and cold water onto your face. While he couldn’t drown you, the shock of the water hitting your face was enough to startle you awake. 

“You’re an asshole, you know that right?” You asked, voice thick with exhaustion and holding none of its usual edge that he’d been used to. With a groan you pulled yourself up to a sitting position and brush the flowers off of your soaked body. Doflamingo observed you silently, unable to stop himself from noting the way your clothes now clung just a little tighter against your skin. “I’m awake you can go now. Go do your criminal King duties.”

“Would love to but I’m just passing time while waiting on a call.” He explained. “Remember your little island you’d been stationed on? We’re going to finalise the deal.”

“Right. Weapons and foot soldiers in exchange for profit and resources.” You nodded slumping back and rubbing your stiff neck. 

“Exactly. I think I’m going to be kind and send them extra men to ensure every Marine is wiped off that island for good measure.” Doflamingo mused and grinned widely when you paused. There was the flicker in your eyes again. Only this time because of your lack of sleep you weren’t able to hide your emotions as clearly. You knew something about the island.

“This group doesn’t know you’re the one they’re working with do they?” You asked, a smile fighting to pull at your lips. ”You’re using an alias?”

“Still an alias they’re familiar with.”

“When your pirate friend calls, ask them if the Midnight Lake is as nice as it sounds.”

“And why would I do that?” Doflamingo asked while you got to your feet and tiredly stretched out your limbs. “What is it you know?”

“Ask him. Don’t ask him. Quite honestly I don’t care.” You shrugged, taking a step passed Doflamingo’s larger frame only to be grabbed sharply and in seconds you were pinned on the closest surface which was a desk, staring at him as he bore down, his face dangerously close. Tiredly your mind began to catch up with your position on the desk surface, your hands were captured in his larger ones, on either side of your head. His grip was like a vice, you could only really tell from the way the veins rose agains this skin but as always you felt no harm in the hold. You glanced away from his hand and returned your delayed attention back to his face. “What now?”

“I asked you what it is you know about the island.” Doflamingo repeated, his grin gone and his tone deeper and calmer which should have made him seem more sinister but still your body felt no fear. You had no need to be. You also had no need to give him an answer, at least not the one he wanted.

“Ask your friend first and then I’ll tell you.”

“Tell me now.”

“God this must frustrate you so much.” You laughed up at him. “I’m not your servant or part of your King Doffy fan club. I’m not going to just do something because you tell me to.” You lifted your foot and set it squarely against his chest, pushing him back so you could sit up. Just at that moment the library door burst open and you both looked to see one of the pirates under Doflamingo’s command freeze immediately at the sight. 

Blankly you blinked at the flustered subordinate as their mouth rapidly opened and shut as they tried to work out if they should apologise, say what they came in to say, kneel down and accept his punishment or just leave. You resumed sitting up and pulled out of Doflamingo’s hold while he straightened. Now back on your feet and walking you felt a fresh wave of exhaustion crash over your body. Your vision blurred briefly and your body staggered in the middle of your step but you managed to recover in time to avoid falling over. Knowing Doflamingo would be busy with his criminal call meant you could quickly change into dry clothes and sleep without interruption. 

———-

“Joker to hear you’re going to send more weapons than originally discussed is such a relief. Truly you’re a godsend. You-” Doflamingo began to zone out of fully listening to the adoring voice at the end of the phone, the overly appreciative words beginning to rub him the wrong way. He was too busy thinking about your suggestion to mention this ‘midnight lake’ and how it was clear you knew something. Even asking if this pirate knew who he was truly dealing with brought more irritation. He wouldn’t treat a betrayal kindly. “Joker?” Doflamingo blinked, his eyes on the map as he sharpened his mind once more. 

“Yes?”

“Sorry, you’re a busy man so I hope I’m not cutting into your valuable time.”

“No, no. I should apologise. I was distracted.” Doflamingo began, sitting back in his seat as he quickly thought of how to subtly bring up the subject without causing suspicion. “My new lover spotted the map you sent. They thought Midnight Lake sounded romantic, it’s made me curious.”

“Midnight Lake?” The voice on the end of the den den mushi repeated, their tone holding some degree of tension. So there was something. “Oh well you can tell them it’s a sight to behold. One of the gems of the island.”

“Good to know…” Doflamingo mused, fingers lightly drumming on his desk. Quickly he summoned a string to slam his office door open, the loud impact echoing through to the man at the other end of the call. “Something urgent’s come up. You’ll have to call me back, give me half an hour.” Without waiting for the only acceptable answer to sound, Doflamingo ended the call and left his office, heading straight to your room. Approaching your door he caught sight of the mountain of broken alarm clocks set outside. He chuckled, not entirely surprised to find you’d managed to find them all. The level of destruction you’d caused on them was a surprise though. Not able to stay and appreciate it fully, he entered your room and approached your bed where you lay, completely unconscious and breathing deeply. 

“Wake up.” He ordered, eye twitching when you didn’t even twitch. Doflamingo drew closer and called out your name, watching your finger twitch but still you remained sleeping. Clicking his tongue he climbed onto the bed and for the second time today he found himself poised over your relaxed form. 

At the added weight onto the mattress you finally stirred. Blearily your eyes cracked open and your heavy head lifted off of the pillows just enough to make out who was in front of you. When you saw it was Doflamingo you made a nonsensical grumble and flopped back down already asleep. You were only partly aware of his hands finding your shoulders but then let out a growl of frustration when you were shaken. “Whaaaat?” You drew out the word as you managed to summon the faintest resource of energy to waken and glare at the man who was unfortunately your soulmate and greatest annoyance in life. “What now?”

“Midnight Lake.” Doflamingo stated. “Tell me what it is and what you know.”

“What’s in it for me?” You asked with a yawn, sitting up and gathering the pillows behind you to at least prop you up since clearly you weren’t going back to sleep yet. 

“I’ll never interfere with your sleep again.” Doflamingo propositioned, catching your attention.

“Deal.” You agreed and gestured for him to start talking. “What did he say about it first?”

“He said it was a sight to behold, certainly one of the island’s gems.” He stated and waited for your response. What he hadn’t been expecting was for your burst of laughter. This was unlike any laugh he’d heard from you. This was not the hysterical laugh you’d made when you learned you were soulmates or the cold, scathing, mocking laughs you threw his way at times. This was genuine warmth and amusement. Finally you let your joy settle and you grinned at him.

“Oh you’re going to love this.” You began. “Well maybe not…Show me the map.”

“It’s in my office.”

“So go get it.” You instructed with a roll of your eyes. Doflamingo glared. It was bad enough you once again getting the upper hand but he wasn’t going to see to your whims. 

Swiftly he hooked his arm around your waist and lifted you out of the bed, carrying you down the corridor while you were too tired to really protest being dragged out of bed once again. If Doflamingo was to keep his word then this would be the last time he could do so. Plus you didn’t want to admit but being held against his chest and feeling the warmth of his body was oddly comfortable but you just reasoned it was because you were so sleep deprived. Before you knew it you were in Doflamingo’s office and sat at his desk, perched on his lap as he pulled the map you asked for into view. Yawning you rubbed your eyes and grabbed a pencil to begin indicating the areas for Doflamingo to pay attention to. 

“Okay firstly you’ve been given an old map.” You explained and Doflamingo’s jaw clenched. “I’d guess at least a year’s difference. Normally that wouldn’t be an issue but given all that’s happened here your little pirate friend is withholding information on purpose.”

“What happened?”

“Well for one there’s no more civilians living there.” You began, your pencil scoring out the names of the towns from the map. “The biggest mine is completely depleted of resources.” Your pencil slowly drew the border of the land that the mine had once occupied. “And sadly for you, there’s no Marine on that island. We left when all civilians had been evacuated and knew there was nothing left of value there.”

“It’s abandoned?” Doflamingo asked with a low snarl as the reality of the deception that was being attempted on him. 

“Not abandoned. Last I heard the Revolutionary Army occupied it to act as a small base of operations or something.” You shrugged, your stinging eyes getting heavier. Doflamingo’s anger was building, the Revolutionary Army hadn’t even been mentioned during the talks. “My guess is your friend is looking to just take your weapons and sell them on after killing your men and making it seem like they died ‘taking over the island’ and fighting the Revolutionaries. They were never intending on setting foot on that island. Plus you can’t give a share of resources if there are none to give. Someone tried to get the better of you.”

“So what was Midnight Lake?” Doflamingo asked, his teeth grinding together while you let out another sleepy laugh.

“Midnight Lake was man-made.” You explained managing to lift the pencil to indicate to its name on the map just beside where the mine was. “It was the waste water from the refinery and smelt atrocious. Certainly not a gem.” With another long heavy yawn you sat back, your eyes falling closed. Doflamingo looked down at the feeling of your body settling against his chest, asleep once again. His fingers twitched at the sight, part of him toyed with the idea of just setting you down on the sofa or taking you back to your room but stopped himself. After all he’d promised he wouldn’t interfere with your sleep ever again and this was just him keeping his word.  

Suddenly the den den mushi began to ring and you slightly stirred, causing Doflamingo’s hand to settle against your head while the other lifted the receiver to answer before you could wake. Immediately you settled and a small sigh broke from your lips. “Joker? Is now a good time?”

“Yes, everything is fine. The previous situation was dealt with but I’ll have to keep this brief.” Doflamingo began, managing to contain his rage against this disgusting weasel who thought they could ever succeed in getting the better of him and steal from him. “Given the amount of weapons and manpower I’ll be now giving you, you’ll have to come to me to collect it. The last thing I want is for my precious cargo to be at risk without ample protection and your ships will be more than enough.”

“O-oh well if you think that’d be best, Joker then who am I to argue?”

“Indeed..” Doflamingo grinned. “Give me your location and I’ll send my closest representative to escort you to the island I’m staying at. I promise you and your men will be given the best welcome.”

“Joker, your kindness is truly great. There’s no need for pirates as lowly as us.”

“Nonsense, you all deserve it.” Doflamingo chuckled. “We’ll see you soon.” 

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[messrsrarchives]

You’re starting to act just like your fascist Reggie—censoring others and trying to dictate what can and cannot be discussed in fandom. Telling people they can’t talk about politics because you, living in a first-world country, can’t handle it? You’re the one using real-world politics to justify a fictional ship with a fascist. Have you thought about how people who are genuinely anti-fascist might also dislike it in fiction? You can’t control fandom. If you want to like fascist characters, then just own it. While fiction might not feel like reality to you, for many, it is reality. Have you considered that the characters and headcanons you enjoy might reflect deeply personal experiences for others? Not everyone has the privilege to separate fiction from reality like you do.

hi feed, this message was brought to you by someone who has clearly never interacted with me ever !

WDYMMM "telling people they can't talk about politics" 😭😭 i fear that's my ENTIRE niche across two social media platforms. i fear my entire thing is politics in a fandom space + the real world. i fear that's literally what i'm known for. what 😖

i was gonna ignore this but i have so many receipts that i thought okay ! finna answer ! why not, let's entertain this <3 (below the cut because it's long)

assuming that this is a response to this post where, after watching elon perform two nazi salutes on stage, i said "hey! maybe you should stop calling people in fandom nazis for reading about a fictional character!"

what i alsooo said on that post is that it's important to discuss politics in literature (see here: doing a masters degree in english literature + politics <3). because absolutely! the DEs are crafted in a way that reflects historic events and absolutely, that's something we can discuss!

what we should also discuss is that whilst art imitiates life and life imitates art, the two do not directly reflect one another - if i read about wizards, i am not a wizard. if i read a crime book, i am not a detective. and if i read fanfic about regulus black? i am not a facist.

in regards to the censorship comment: this here is an entireeee video i made about censorship and puritanical views in fandom spaces and why this is a Bad Thing To Do (though i fear you will disagree with it because i am saying that people can read and write whatever but alas, no censorship here x)

using real world politics to justify a ship? no, not at all. i do not think ships in fandom need to be "justified" because, again, they are fiction. can they be discussed? absolutely! my tiktok is @/messrsrobyn and you will find countless videos where i dissect fandom, characters and ships. again, this is kind of my whole thing <33 nice to meet you <33 but rather for me? that post was made as a building up of (1) the mass of people in fandom during the tiktok ban saying that words have meaning when american writers say british words "wrong", but throw buzzwords around like it's nothing and (2) this is a place for escapism and safety, which is needed now more than ever and whilst discussions about politics are important, this? this ask? this is not a discussion. this is hostility, much like people just commenting "nazi" with nothing else on a jegulus post.

discussions can be had! absolutely! my entire thing is discussions in fandom. but right now i'm trying to discuss this when you have given me nothing to work with but false claims and hostility - see how this doesn't work? but alas, i'll try :)

do people read jegulus and think "wow i love voldemort and the death eaters!!! i agree with what the did here :D" or do they read jegulus and enjoy the complexity that comes with a character like him? do they enjoy how, with a character with such little canon lore, people explore things? or yk what, do they sometimes read him as a muggle where none of this matter because there's do DEs? yeah, because it's fiction. and liking a fictional character does not have repercussions on the real world.

calling someone a facist/nazi only for teading about fictional characters does - it is so incredibly important that we read immoral literature. i'm rambling now but i'm not even talking just about fandom. we NEED books that discuss these topics and we need to explore the characters within them. we NEED politics and immorality and everything like that in books because that is how we learn, understand, and prevent. reading them does make you immoral - see here: queer books being banned in the us for containing "immoral themes" and main characters doing things they deem had and awful alongside INCREDIBLYYYY important books like the handmaids tale, to kill a mockingbird, 1984, fahrenheit 451 etc etc.

we need to read these. we need to engage with them.

but in a fandom space, we also need to acknowledge that these are not real people. these are fictional characters and there's a big difference between engaging with a character because you are justifying their actions, and engaging with a character because you enjoy Exploring their character and Understanding them in as many ways as possible 🙂↕️

but we agree!! whilst fiction may not feel like reality to some people, to many it is! so have we considered that when people come to escape from the real world for a bit, or people have family members lost to past regimes; are about to enter 4 years of another regime or are holding their breath waiting for european elections to see if another far-right populist party gets in, it might sucklk to have this thrown around?

imagine dealing with alllll of that in reality, not knowing what on earth is going to happen tomorrow or what the future holds for you and the people you love, and then being called a facist online because you read about Fictional Character Regulus Black. whilst your life literally crumbles apart because of it. you are now being called the same thing that the man oppressing you and everyone you love is, because you read FanFiction.

and then finally ahem:

"not everyone has the privilege to separate fiction from reality like you do"

if you click here, you will find a tumblr post i made about this exact thing :D about how we can't separate fiction from reality

see here also: a post about the books jkr publishes under the robert galbraith pseudonym and about how we, again, cannot separate fiction from reality.

if you click here you will find my jkr playlist on tiktok which has videos in about how, again, we cannot separate fiction from reality.

what we also can't do, mind you is call someone a facist for reading a fictional character.

there is big difference between "hey! this character has facist undertones if applied irl, we could discuss this!" and "You Are A Facist For Reading It"

instead of coming and ranting to someone who has spoken extensivelyyyy about politics in this fandom space - both with fandom material and with elections, gaza, the uk riots etc etc - and is a huge advocate of dicussions and debates, put this energy into something productive.

like actual facists. real world politics and what you could be doing at a local level to help reduce the harm of Actual Facists that are in power right now. not people taking a break from Actual Facism to read fanfiction.

ta x

(p.s i'm a homeless, chronically-ill, gay, trans man. what privilege do i have in THISSS fandom space of JK ROWLINGSSSSS worlds, to separate reality from fiction? 😭)

[merakiui]

Jock floyd who's name has been ran thru the streets ragged, but he's actually a little virgin otaku who needs to keep up his cool persona because otherwise all his 'flirty' actions will be seen as creepy. He doesn't want sports and alcohol, he wants mersex and breeding and keeping you locked up and and and

Can also be turned the vulnerability way where everyone assumes he's a player because he's playful but he's actually yearning and longing and sensitive, using avoidance tactics (Cater kin) and he's down bad in love with reader since childhood because she doesn't treat him based on assumptions and he feels like he can be nerdy ol floyb when he's with her <3

VIRGIN NERD OTAKU FLOYB!!!!!! OMG........ on the outside, he's that loud jock who everyone thinks sleeps around like a sex addict, but the truth is that he's a gross closet pervert who has never even held hands,,,,,, oh, that's so delicious. orz he's got everyone fooled with the persona he puts up. While everyone is spreading rumors about how he definitely fucked that one basketball team cheerleader, he's busy jerking it to hentai and imagining you in those scenes. AAAAA HE'S A LOSER!!!!!! <3

Floyb who normally wears contacts, but he tends to lose those and so he goes out into the world with blurry vision because putting on his glasses would decrease his cool guy aura. T_T he wears his glasses when he's alone, though. One day he overheard you say glasses are cool and since then he's been dying to fuck you with them on so you can tell him he looks cool. orz orz he's so desperate and wants you like you're the air he breathes. He can't talk to you as Floyd. He has to talk to you as the (supposed) fuck-boy jock with the crazy-high libido and flirty tongue. >_<

The "dumb jock" trope, but Floyd's actually super smart and does well in his classes. It's just when lack of motivation or bad mood hits that his grades suffer, but he's a very brilliant student. Hehe nerdy Floyb looking up all the ways to pleasure you and practicing on his onahole how to finger like an expert.

Everyone on the basketball team has their usual locker room talk before and after practice. Some of them brag about the flings they've recently had. Floyd doesn't really care about any of that because last night he came to the thought of knocking you up, and if anyone knew the types of fantasies he's had regarding you,,,, the viewpoint would change. It's not like he truly cares what others think of him, whether it's true or false, but he does want to give you a good impression of himself. He loves you the most, after all. Everyone else might as well be ghosts.

[felassan]

Shinobi602 comments on ResetEra:

"If Anthem was a runaway success, you'd be seeing a very different BioWare right now who'd be all in on the live service model. They're running uphill because they've got goodwill they need to earn back after the fact, but its failure (plus Fallen Order's success) is what allowed them to pivot right back to what they're good at: single player character driven RPGs. Silver lining but still." [source]

User: "I don't think its unreasonable to have hoped that a Dragon Age game would have similar gameplay to previous Dragon Age games." Shinobi: "Veilguard does have similar gameplay though, just not the exact same gameplay." [source]

"Open world doesn't automatically mean better. Inquisition's open world zones were basically Bioware's response to Skyrim and anticipating that's what players wanted. The big zones were cool but they were also bloated and full of uninteresting quests. Andromeda also took Mass Effect to huge open world zones and they had the same result. It was ass and the game benefited nothing from it. It's better for Bioware to stick to what they do best which is tighter, more structured play spaces." [source]

"they'll do what they think they're good at. Inquisition was highly rated, but the big open areas were also flawed. If they felt that's not what they'll excel at, that's fine. There ARE larger open areas in Veilguard though. If that's your very strict definition on what will make the game good apparently." [source]

"If you're sole definition of a Dragon Age game is that you can take direct control of companions and a tac-cam, it's understandable. But I think it's completely false that this is somehow unrecognizable as a Dragon Age game. There are tons of different aspects that define the series outside of that." [source]

"It's been evolving and changing for over a decade." [source]

"They did say there are some "killer cameos" they're keeping secret. My mind's going to several different possibilities..." [source]

User: "Yeah, they need to wrap up this story in this game. I'm already a little annoyed that we are getting another "the veil is torn and demons are wrecking havoc" story. They cannot stretch that to a third game." Shinobi: "It's a lot more than that. It's not a repeat of Inquisition or anything." [source]

"This might genuinely be the most in depth CC in a mainstream RPG that I've seen." [source]

"Yeah this is more like Inquisition, though you could still change out companion helmets in that one." [source]

"They did confirm tavern songs are back so that's good news, and The Swan (Minrathous tavern) has a bunch." [source]

"Yeah there's a good amount of veterans working on Veilguard. Though I always find that to be such a weird qualifier, and it seemingly always comes up with Bioware in particular. As if there aren't tons of talented non-Bioware devs from across the industry who could join the team and still write and design a great game. Like nah, it can't be a good game unless it's got people who've been there for 20 years! 😄" [source]

"There are also rune items you can equip that provide different effects and act as their own abilities basically, plus ultimate attacks for each class specialization (so 9 total), plus finisher moves and things like elemental combo detonations for extra damage." [source]

"there are definitely 'open areas' you can explore around in. It's not more linear than ME2." [source]

User: "Is my reading of "mission-based" it being like ME2/3 correct?" Shinobi: "Yeah, in that regard, it's more structured like Mass Effect, which I think is to its benefit. DAI just suffered way too much from open world bloat. I think the tighter, handcrafted structure works a lot better." [source]

User: "How big are the areas? Like the first game where you open the map and pick a location?" Shinobi: "Don't know exactly. But that's what I was told. There are several open ended areas that are explorable in the story. Plus a hub area." [source]

"I think if fans have been yearning for a quality Bioware game like they were used to before, this is that. Tight design, great character models, environments, animations have gone next level, combat fluidity, etc...it's all here. I compare it to the jump from ME1->ME2. [re: the jump in quality/fidelity/presentation.] This isn't a spoiler, as Game Informer said, it's a full on action RPG, and you can still pause and issue commands. But this is not DAO. Preferences put aside, Bioware's moved on from that ages ago. This isn't BG3 at all. But they've put a huge emphasis on making combat feel good to play. As in engaging the player, more real-time, more Mass Effect. It's a meaty, single player RPG with lots of systems going on inside. Also, like they said, this is the prologue, the beginning of the game. Keep that in mind if you don't see everyone's powers unlocked or intense pause and play. If you keep all that in mind, I think you'll really like this." [source]

"But it's a big jump for Bioware. [re: animations]" [source]

"[rogues are] flashy, jump around a lot, etc." [source]

"Party members can definitely get knocked out in battle" [source]

"It's important to note that what was shown was completely level 1 combat, and likely on easy mode for demo purposes. There is way more to it in more advanced battles. When it opens up with way more abilities, unique momentum attacks, ultimates, and other...things they haven't shared yet, on higher difficulties, it will look and feel way different." [source]

"It'll be rated M. It's got its share of nudity lol." [source]

User: "should we expect a comparable level of dialogue role playing as we had in Inquisition? I don't mind the changes to combat but there seemed to be more auto dialogue here than I remember from Inquisition or Tresspasser." Shinobi: "Yeah. That was just the intro. They just like to keep the pace going for a big start to the game." [source]

"This isn't accurate at all though, and it keeps getting perpetuated. Yes, there's been departures like Casey Hudson, Aaryn Flynn, Mike Laidlaw, etc, but I could easily list dozens of people at Bioware right now that have been there for 10-20+ years, some even longer. Do they just...not count for some reason? The entire core team building Mass Effect right now were OG leads on ME1-3, been there for over 20 years. And even outside of that, like, does this really matter? Do you know one of the game's premier VFX/lighting designers worked for ILM? Or one of the cinematic leads is an alum from Blizzard? Or one of the creature animators was a senior creature animator on Horizon Forbidden West? Talent is talent. And if we look at the industry through that lens too, sure, tons of studios are just "X, Y, Z studio in name", in many ways. There's no studio in the industry that holds on to their entire team for 30-40 years." [source]

"They do have that data. And I think even this thread would be shocked at how tiny of a % of players took direct control of other companions. Or went into tac-cam. Not just Inquisition but the whole series." [source]

[these-written-reveries]

Selfish (katsuki ver.)

‣ Pairing: Katsuki x GN!Reader

‣ Genre: Flangst, Hurt/Comfort

‣ Summary: Katsuki is convinced that you are in love with Eijirou, and not him. He tries to do what he thinks is right by keeping his feelings suppressed and hidden from you, instead of trying to get between the happiness of the two people he cares about the most. His plan quickly begins to fall apart the moment you confront him, and his selfish urges take over.

‣ Warnings: Angst, Katsuki being sad and having low self-esteem, false unrequited love, making out, Reader uses the “girl’s” elevator (but we can just pretend gender plays no part in the placement of the dorm rooms in this scenario), the word “fuck” is used a lot, repeated use of "noose" metaphor? idk

‣ Word Count: 5,798

‣ A/N: There is a Kiribaku x Reader version of this here, if you’re interested!

Main Masterlist

Katsuki Bakugou was a selfish man.

He had begrudgingly accepted this truth a long time ago. Despite how it appeared on the surface, he was quite self-aware. Sure, it didn’t require that much self-reflection to figure it out, considering he’d been told this very truth by others around him multiple times throughout his life—at least by the ones that were brave enough to do so—but that’s beside the point. He still came to be aware of it, one way or another.

He could remember the early days of his youth as a spoiled, entitled brat. Even before his quirk developed, he always poised himself as superior to others. He was as selfish as they came. Throwing fits when he didn’t get his way, hurting people around him to ease the raging storm of feelings that were too big for his little body, always stealing the spotlight from others, expecting praise and rewards for every little thing he did. Kids are inherently selfish, to some degree, but little Katsuki blew every kid in his grade out of the water, in this regard.

Things didn’t improve all that much as he grew older, but he did get a little better. At least he no longer threw tantrums over not getting ice cream after school or every time he was told “no.” And he no longer sought praise for merely breathing. He preferred to truly earn his title as “the best” at whatever he decided to do—even if that meant knocking some other kids down to get there faster. A minor improvement, but his selfish nature was still wildly out of control. Even when he did recognize it, he didn’t care enough to fix it. He was already seen as an asshole; what was the point in trying to change the minds of people he saw as below him?

It wasn’t until he broke free of his ass-kissing, follower friends and met you and the other friends “extras” from his class at UA that he finally began to really see and care about his selfish ways—especially how they affected the people he truly respected and cared about. Katsuki wasn’t devoid of a heart, despite what many people believed. He wasn’t incapable of feeling remorse for his actions and of learning how to be a better person. He just never had the proper tools or guidance to be able to grow into the person that he, deep down, wanted to be.

That, and he didn’t have the same motivation before as he suddenly did when you stepped into his life. You pushed him to be better, just by being yourself. Katsuki was inspired by you from the moment he met you. The way you carried yourself and the way you managed to handle him and all that came with being his friend. It only made him respect you more. And as he inevitably began to fall for you, he felt the desire to be a better person for you grow even stronger. He wanted to prove to you that he was worth keeping around, even if he wasn’t always “the best” at everything. The last thing he wanted was to lose you over his problematic ways.

To his luck, you were one of the most tolerant people he had ever met. That didn’t mean you never called him out on his shit, though. Katsuki deeply valued you for that. He had grown to be more open and accepting of critical feedback, specifically if it came from you. How could he become a great hero, never mind a great man, if he refused any and all feedback that wasn’t positive?

That said, it still wasn’t easy for him to so easily accept when he was wrong. And it was even more difficult for him to push past his pride enough to apologize for it. But all it took was one look from you to make him give in and do just that. How you managed to gain such power over him, he’d never understand. If he wasn’t so damn in love with you, he’d hate you for it.

He still hated you for it. But in a “fuck you for making me love you so much” kind of way.

If it wasn't for his internal commitment to be a better person—one that you could be proud to know—he would have given into his selfish urges, stolen your heart, and claimed it as his a long time ago.

Katsuki had quickly come to learn that being a good person sucks.

“Oh, Eiji texted. He said he’ll be here soon! I invited him. Figured you wouldn’t mind. He said he needs all the help he can get for this upcoming exam,” you said as you began typing a message back to him.

“Fucking hell.”

“Huh?”

You looked up at Katsuki after hearing him grumble something unintelligible under his breath. His eyes met yours for only a brief moment before he averted his gaze, gesturing to the open books in front of you.

“Nothing. Get back to studying! Do you wanna pass that exam, or what?”

You threw your head back as you groaned. “Can’t we just take a little break? Eiji’s not even here yet and we have so much time left to work on this!”

Katsuki pointed his pen at you. “You might have time, but I don’t. You’re lucky I’m even using my spare time to help you idiots with this!”

You rolled your eyes. “You wanted to study for this test too. And you’re the one always preaching about how it’s important to take breaks!”

Before he could respond, you shut your book and looked at him inquisitively.

“So…what were you thinking about before? You looked…more annoyed than usual. Am I annoying you?”

“What the hell do you mean? I don’t look like anything!”

He could see you trying to stifle a laugh, though behind it was a glint of concern in your eyes.

“You look like something is really bothering you, is all.”

“Yeah. You are! Shut up and get back to work,” he growled, though you felt no real malice behind it. You had quickly learned long ago not to take the hotheaded blonde’s rude attitude seriously, often times finding it to be more of a protective shield than anything else.

“Okay, whatever you say,” you said, holding your hands up defensively with a slightly amused smirk on your face. Katsuki huffed in response as he looked away.

Giggling at his strange, yet all too familiar behavior, you opened your textbook again, only to be distracted less than a minute later by another ding from your phone. Katsuki could already tell it was another text from Eijirou by the way you smiled at your screen when you read it. You only ever smiled like that when reading the redhead’s messages, much to Katsuki’s chagrin.

“Fuck you,” Katsuki thought as he stared at you from across the table, frustration and hurt bubbling within his chest.

The truth was, you had the strange ability to make his heart flutter and his stomach do flips and his hands sweat like crazy and fill his brain with so many thoughts of you, he couldn’t focus on anything else. You did all this just by existing as your stupidly beautiful, perfect self.

You even made him feel this way when you looked your “worst”. Beaten up after a bad fight, sleep deprived with bags under your eyes, after—very ungracefully—shoving a giant serving of food into your mouth, just waking up with messy hair and crusty eyes and morning breath, sick with snot constantly leaking out of your nose. All of this, and he was still head over heels, swooning over you like a fool. And dammit, did it piss him off.

Even worse, he knew you had feelings for his redheaded friend and not him. He couldn’t blame you for this. He was a damn lovable idiot. A good guy, all around. The kind of man Katsuki wished he could be more like.

He couldn’t blame Eijirou for loving you either. As far as he was concerned, how could anyone not fall for you?

Katsuki loved your entire personality—even the parts that frustrated him most. Especially those parts. On top of that, you were absolutely gorgeous. When he begrudgingly thought of you and Eijirou together, he couldn’t deny that the two of you would make an amazing couple—looks-wise and personality-wise.

It infuriated him to no end. He wanted to hate you both, push you away, relocate somewhere far away so that he’d no longer have to bear the pain of seeing the two of you flirting together, laughing at each other’s jokes, hugging one another, and inevitably doing all the things that couples do. All the things that Katsuki wanted so desperately to do with you.

But he couldn’t, no matter how hard he tried. There was no way he could bring himself to not only truly hate you, but to go on living life without you. He would likely never admit it, but you had become so interwoven in his life and his heart, that an existence without you just seemed so bleak and empty.

So, as much as it pained him to sit through hangouts and study sessions and the like, all while bearing witness to how close, how touchy, how obviously in love, you were with Eijirou and not him, he chose to stick around and keep his mouth shut. He could have pulled the “dibs” card if he wanted to with Eijirou; tell him he loved you first, so he better back off and let him have you. But that wasn't what a good person would do. So instead, he made a solemn promise to himself not to utter a word about his feelings for you, ever.

For once, he saw exactly what he wanted, right in front of him, and he chose not to take it. He chose not to ruin whatever closeness he did have with you. But more importantly, he chose not to ruin you and Eijirou’s chances at finding the happiness that you both deserved, far more than he did.

It was the most selfless thing he’d ever done. And it was the hardest thing he’d ever done too. He felt his heart break every time he saw the affectionate way you treated Eijirou, but he bit his tongue. He tried to shove his feelings down deeper and deeper, but they kept coming back up, tightening around his throat like a noose until he choked.

The truth became quite apparent to him at one point. Loving you from afar would be his undoing. And maybe he deserved it? Maybe this was his punishment for being an asshole and tearing others down for his own benefit for all those years.

He’d take his punishment. Just so long as he could continue to know you, even if he wanted to know you so much more.

God, he fucking loved hated you.

After the previous day’s study session, Katsuki needed a break from the two of you. He planned to spend most of the day training and holed up in his dorm, just to avoid you as much as possible; to set his mind straight and get his feelings back where they belonged—locked away in a dark unlabeled box in his mind, along with all of his other unwanted thoughts and feelings. He was starting to lose his composure around you, and when that happened, he always tried to stay out of your way for a few days until he was “fine” again.

“Fine” had lost all its meaning months ago, and yet, he found himself saying it all too often.

“You okay, Kats? You’re not really on your A game today,” you said as you walked over to help him off the ground for the second time that day.

Katsuki scoffed, a low growl brewing in his throat as he spoke. “I’m fuckin’ fine. Wasn’t planning on having you idiots around, distracting me.”

You and Eijirou seemed to have the same idea about working out and training that day. Katsuki ran into you both on his way to the gym. Almost turned around and booked it back to the dorms, but you happened to see him and waved him over to join the two of you. You smiled happily as you greeted him. It pissed him off so much, but he couldn’t say no to you when you looked so damn cute, asking him to join you with those pretty eyes sparkling as they looked up at him.

He wanted to curse you out. Tell you to fuck off and leave him alone.

Get out of his fucking head, already! Stop torturing him with that fucking adorable smile that made his heart clench in his chest! Stop being so fucking nice to him!

But he bit his tongue, salvaged whatever little composure and willpower he had left, and joined you both to train.

And he fucking sucked the whole time. It only added to his inner turmoil even more. He was too distracted. Too focused on you and the way you looked so fucking good when you were focused, when you had sweat dripping down your skin, when you were looking at him with those determined eyes while sparring, when you didn’t hold back against him.

At least you were more focused on him than Eijirou, at the moment. Katsuki had insisted that you both took turns going against him until he kicked both of your asses. He was on round three, at this point. He had lost to you both a total of three times in a row.

He knew that you and Eijirou were starting to question his strange behavior lately. He practically stormed out of his own dorm the day prior during your study session together. He didn’t say a word. Just got up and left.

Why?

Because you and Eijirou. That’s why.

When he came back, things were awkward as the two of you tried to ask him about it. He didn’t look at either of you when he told you to leave, not wanting you to see his red, glossy eyes.

It was embarrassing, to feel this weak.

Eijirou knocked on his door later that evening to talk to him. He didn’t answer.

Now the two of you were obviously trying to pretend that everything was normal, for his sake; trying to gently coax whatever was bothering him out of his system in hopes that he’d come around and get out of whatever shitty headspace he was in. You were being good friends, like usual. Always so attentive and thoughtful and caring.

He wanted to scream.

This time, he managed to defeat Eijirou, but he could tell his moves were slightly slower. He was going fucking easy on him. The redhead giving him a pity win only managed to send Katsuki over the edge.

By the time it was your turn, he wasn’t even fully present in his body anymore. All he was focused on was winning one round. Just one solid win was all he needed.

He moved on autopilot, blocking and countering all your attacks swiftly as they came. Thankfully, you weren’t holding back. For a moment, he felt like he was finally winning at something. The suffocating feelings began to dissipate as the adrenaline high began to kick in, filling him with a sense of power and control.

Until you called for a pause.

“What the fuck! Why?!” he barked, smoke wafting off of his hot hands.

Eijirou held a hand out at him, signaling him to back off as he ran towards you. “Chill the fuck out man, they're hurt!”

“Huh?”

It was only then that he realized you were holding your weight on one leg, struggling to keep yourself balanced as you tried to stand on your own. Eijirou was quick to catch you before you fell.

You had an ugly burn on your leg from one of his explosions. He thought he had released it far enough away from you to dodge it. He was clearly wrong.

Katsuki’s head was fuzzy as he stared at you, frozen in place. Eijirou inspected your wound, offering you sweet words of comfort and praise as he carefully wrapped it with gauze.

Damn it.

Katsuki could barely breathe now. The noose growing tight around his throat again.

“Come on, little hero. Let’s get you to Recovery Girl.” Eijirou lifted you up into his arms with ease, carrying you out of sight.

Your little whimper of pain shot straight through his heart.

Fuck.

“Come on, Katsuki!” Eijirou called out to him, slight urgency in his voice.

Katsuki remained frozen where he stood, hands clenched and chest heaving as he tried to fight back the tears that were building in his eyes. A million thoughts and feelings swirled inside of him, threatening to burst through the seams of his being.

“Kats?” Your voice sounded distant. It echoed in the background of his mind before it fully reached him.

“Go on without me,” was all he could say. He cringed at the way his voice wavered when he said it.

“Come on, man. You should-”

“Go!” Katsuki yelled, interrupting Eijirou’s attempt to change his mind.

All he heard after that was the sound of Eijirou’s footsteps as they faded away.

You and Eijirou had tried to reach out to Katsuki for four days. He somehow managed to avoid the two of you at every turn. He mostly stayed locked up in his dorm when school wasn’t in session. All calls went to voicemail. All texts left on read.

You even went as far as to try to get Sero or Mina to check in on him. Denki offered to give it a shot, but you declined. You knew he’d probably only aggravate him more, despite his best intentions.

Every plan of yours failed.

You missed your best friend. And despite Eijirou’s reassuring comments to you that he would come back soon, that he just needed some space, you were starting to crumble under the fear that maybe he wouldn’t. He had been acting strange lately, even before the most recent event occurred.

What if you had upset him? What if he was tired of being your friend? What if you were holding him back somehow?

Your thoughts spun in circles in your mind until you began to feel dizzy and sick to your stomach. After tossing and turning for hours that night, you headed down to the kitchen to make yourself some tea in hopes that it’d finally help you quiet your mind enough to allow you to get some much-needed sleep.

Thankfully, it did, because by the time Katsuki walked into the room to get some water after he couldn't sleep, you were passed out with your head on the table, your hair sprawled out messily around you and your half-empty mug of cold tea.

You looked beautiful.

“Fuck you,” Katsuki cursed you in his head as he stared down at your hunched over, sleeping form.

The common room was so quiet this late at night, he could clearly hear your little breaths with every rise and fall of your chest. You had drool slightly dripping out of one side of your parted lips and your cute fluffy bunny slippers on your feet—the ones he got for you that one day at the mall.

The sight made his heart flutter.

He huffed in a mixture of sadness and frustration as he turned to walk away, only to stop himself in his tracks after a few steps. He took one look back at you over his shoulder before sighing in defeat.

Walking closer, he worked up the courage to wake you and subsequently face you for the first time in four days. What came out was much more aggressive than he intended.

“Oi!”

You jumped and his heart clenched slightly. He bit the inside of his cheek as you looked up at him, sleepy and confused.

“Ka’ski?” your sweet voice, thick with sleep, filled his ears. He clenched his fists, the bitter taste of blood filling his mouth.

“Go to your dorm. You’re gonna end up with a fucked up neck and back sleeping like that, idiot.”

He began to walk away after that, heading towards the elevator at the end of the room. He didn’t get far, though. The unpleasant screech of a chair on the hard floor, followed by the far more pleasant feeling of your hand wrapped around his wrist stopped him right in his tracks.

“Wait!”

“Go to bed, Y/N,” Katsuki warned. The last thing he wanted was to have whatever conversation you were attempting to start with him.

“No. I can’t sleep, anyway. I just keep worrying about you. Please. Just tell me what’s wrong and what I can do to fix it,” you implored.

Katsuki was tense under your grip, but he didn’t try to pull away, even as he let out a loud huff of frustration.

“Just fuck off, okay? There’s nothing you can do.”

You stared at the back of his head with so much pain and sadness in your eyes. Katsuki could feel your gaze on him. He knew better than to look back at you. That look alone would break his heart more than anything else could.

“I won’t ever stop trying, Katsuki. I care about you so much. I miss you so badly. Please, just talk to me.” Your voice was starting to waver slightly as you spoke. Katsuki hated himself for being the reason behind your sadness and tears.

Even still, he couldn’t let you in on this. He just needed more time to sort out his feelings and lock them away, where they belonged. But after four days, he was still struggling to get himself back in order. All of it was starting to consume him, distract him, make him perform badly as a student and a hero in training. That part only encouraged him to avoid you even more. He wasn’t going to let stupid feelings ruin everything he had worked so hard for.

His silence only pushed you to speak again.

“Katsuki?”

“No.” He pulled away from your grip, but you reached out to grab him again.

“Katsuki, please!”

He spun around to face you, eyes brimming with tears as he yelled in your face.

“What?! You just can't leave shit alone, can you?! Just fuck off, already!”

You looked at him with heartbroken eyes, biting your lower lip to suppress its quivering as tears began to fall down your face.

Fuck.

Katsuki inhaled sharply as his broken and battered heart shattered to pieces in his chest. Both of you were silent as you stared at one another, unsure of how to progress the conversation without breaking into a fit of tears.

“Fuck, I’m…I’m sorry,” Katsuki mumbled, voice barely audible as he looked down at the ground between you. “Just leave me be, okay? You and Eijirou are better off without me, anyway.”

He pulled away from your grip and this time, you didn’t reach for him again. However, your voice still followed him as he walked further away from you.

“How could you say that? You mean the world to us, Kats! You’re our best friend! We need you. I need you. If this is about the other day, just forget about it. I’m fine. All is forgiven-”

“It’s not just about that.” He stopped in his tracks once more, back facing you.

“Then what is it about? Are you mad at me or Eijirou?”

Katsuki shook his head. Your confusion and desperation drew you closer to him. His feet remained glued to the floor.

“You’re not mad?”

“I-“ Katsuki stopped himself. “Just fuck off, Y/N. I’m not going to talk about it.”

“Why not?”

“Because!”

“Katsuki!”

"BECAUSE I- ugh!" he growled, "because it would be selfish of me to tell you! It’d only make things worse! I'm trying to be...fucking better than that."

You opened your mouth to speak, but he continued.

“It was selfish of me to stick around as long as I did. I should’ve just left the two of you be a long time ago. I thought I could-” He sighed. “Never mind. Point is, it’s gone too far. You even got hurt because of my stupid bullshit.”

“What has gone too far? Katsuki, stop talking like this. You’re not going anywhere. Let’s just sit down and talk this out.” There was a clear presence of fear in your tone as you reached out to grab his left hand that was clenched in a tight fist at his side.

He ripped himself away from you. “No. This conversation is over.”

The way he spoke, his voice quiet, lacking any of his usual attitude, made your stomach twist in knots. He sounded so sad, so weak, so defeated. It was completely unlike him, and it scared the shit out of you.

“I give you full permission to be selfish! Just fucking look at me! Tell me what’s wrong!” you begged.

At this point, you were seconds away from getting on your knees just to get his attention, or at the very least, pity. You couldn’t let him walk out of this room. You knew the chances of getting him to open up to you again after this were slim to none. This was it. You had to fight harder; show him you weren’t giving up on him, no matter how hard he pushed you away.

Katsuki was silent, but you could see the way his hands trembled at his sides; his head hung low, his chest heaving. You waited with bated breath behind him, praying he wouldn’t walk away.

Surprisingly, after what felt like a millennium, he turned to face you, his eyes still focused on the floor.

You were scared to make the wrong move, as if you were faced with a small, wounded animal that could scurry off if you so much as breathed the wrong way.

“Kats?” you whispered softly. “It’s okay.”

He shook his head. “No. It’s not.”

“Why do you say that? Katsuki, look at me.” You stepped forward and raised your hand, gently lifting his chin up so you could finally meet his eyes. What you saw broke your heart.

Red eyes glossed over with tears, lower lip trembling as he tried and failed to stifle the emotions that seemed to overtake him. Your eyes only filled with more tears of your own as you stared back at him sadly.

“I don’t want to see you happy without me,” he whispered, breaking the silence between the two of you.

Your brow furrowed in confusion. “What?”

“I want to be the reason you are happy. I want to give you everything you deserve and more.”

“Katsuki…You do make me happy. If anything, I am the least happy when you’re not around,” you said, fingers tracing down his wrist and giving his hand a small squeeze once he allowed you to grasp it. He only seemed to grow more upset at this as he looked down at your interlocked hands.

“But you don’t want me, you want him.”

“What are you talking about? Of course, I wa-” You froze as realization hit you. “Wait…”

Katsuki made a tsk sound. "Looks like you finally got it. Took you long enough."

You blinked at him. "I- Kats, if you have something to tell me, you better say it now."

"I think you know. Why don't you tell me?"

He was too scared to say it and you knew it.

"Katsuki-"

"Tell me."

You sighed, suddenly growing nervous as you began to second-guess if what you were about to say was actually correct. Katsuki's hold on your hand grew tighter as he awaited your answer. If he wasn't so focused on what you were about to say, he'd be embarrassed about the growing dampness between your palms.

"I...do you....do you have...feelings....for me?"

Katsuki’s silence was all the confirmation you needed. You let out a breath of relief.

“Kats-”

“Do you?” he asked, before clarifying. “Have feelings for me? If the answer is ‘no’, say it now and we’ll never speak about it again.”

You stepped closer to him, slippers touching his as you looked at him with soft eyes.

"What if the answer is ‘yes’?" you whispered.

For a moment, you both exchanged glances between eyes and lips, your hearts racing as you awaited the other’s move.

Finally, Katsuki spoke.

"Do I still have permission to be selfish?"

You nodded, and before you knew it, his hands were on either side of your face, and his lips were crashing against yours.

He pushed you against the nearby wall, never breaking his lips from yours, as he kissed you hungrily, desperately, lovingly. You ran your fingernails up the nape of his neck, weaving your fingers through his messy blond locks and earning a groan from him as he pulled you closer by your hips and deepened the kiss even more.

By the time he came up for air, you were both panting heavily. His grip on your hips didn’t loosen and neither did yours around his neck as you stared at each other speechlessly.

After a moment, your lips formed into a smile.

“Dumbass,” you teased.

Katsuki’s soft smile quickly faded into a bewildered frown. “Hah?”

“Eijirou is like a brother to me. I want you, Katsuki. It’s always been you. I love you.”

Katsuki visibly stopped breathing for a brief moment. You nervously continued to speak.

“I’ve been wanting to tell you, and Eijirou has been encouraging me to, but every time I tried, you stormed off, or were clearly out of it, so I was too nervous to bring it up.”

Katsuki growled. You looked at him, confused.

“What? Just say it,” you said.

“Fuck you!” he cursed.

You gasped. “Hey! Watch it, mister!”

“Fuck you for ruining my life by making me love you so goddamn much! And fuck you for not telling me sooner about your weird sibling dynamic and feelings for me and letting me suffer! Do you have any idea how painful it has been watching the two of you idiots and your stupid cutesy, touchy, flirty bullshit, every single day?!” he ranted, obviously frustrated, but not truly directed at you.

“First of all, we weren’t flirting. Also, I didn’t realize-”

“’Course you didn’t! I always thought you’d never return my feelings because it seemed obvious that you were obsessed with him.”

This time, he sounded sad. You cupped his face with your hands, gently running your thumbs over his soft cheeks.

“I have always been obsessed with you, Kats. Only you. It’s not that I didn’t want to be more forward and obvious with my affections for you, I was just never quite sure about your feelings for me and I didn’t want to cross any lines or make you uncomfortable,” you explained.

He let out a sigh, eyes closing as he relaxed into your touch.

“We should talk more about this tomorrow. Probably let Eijirou in on this too,” you said.

He nodded in agreement, soaking up the feeling of your touch; something he had dreamed of and desperately craved for so long. Finally, his dreams were coming true. He was melting between the palms of your hands, and he couldn't have been happier about it.

Now that he'd had a taste, he'd be damned if he were to ever let you go.

“You’re mine now. Got it?” he said, his hands slightly squeezing your hips as he looked into your eyes.

You smirked amusingly at him. “Woah there, don’t get too selfish now.”

Katsuki narrowed his eyes at you, his lips forming into an angry pout.

“Kidding! Don’t get your panties in a twist,” you said, giggling at the look on his face. You knew he hated it when you said that. You were just asking for trouble.

“That’s it! Get over here!” he said, reaching for your face as he tried to kiss you again.

If this was how he chose to punish you for teasing him, you weren’t complaining.

You laughed into the kiss before melting into him completely, allowing him to pull you even closer against him, his strong arms keeping you locked in place. The kiss quickly grew more tender as he savored every second of your soft lips on his.

You placed a hand on his chest at one point, signaling that you needed air. He grunted before reluctantly pulling away.

He pressed his forehead against yours, smirking at the way you grew visibly flustered under his intensely loving gaze.

“It’s late. W-We should get to bed."

He hummed in response. “Fine.”

Taking your hand, he walked you over to the elevator across the room, both of you still silently processing all that had just happened until you finally reached the large metal doorway.

You stepped inside the elevator, bidding him goodnight.

“Night,” he said, turning around and beginning to walk away.

His feet came to a halt when he felt a sudden, familiar urge take over him, and this time, he didn’t fight it. Before he knew it, he had his arm between the metal doors, forcing them to reopen.

“Kats-”

He interrupted you by crashing his lips against yours once more, cradling your face in his hands as he kissed you with everything he had. Every skipped beat of his heart, every pang in his stomach, every moment of longing, every loving thought he’d ever had of you flashed through his mind. For once, he wasn’t concerned about ruining anything, of hurting anyone, of losing you. All he cared about was satisfying the insufferable itch of longing and desire he’d carried for you all this time.

Finally, the noose was gone, the bad feelings dissipating while the others became one with his being. He could breathe again.

When he pulled away, he was smiling. He was happy.

And you were too. Happy because of him. Happy with him.

“You should be selfish more often,” you said, still trying to catch your breath.

Katsuki stopped the doors from closing in on him, his eyes still locked on you as he let out a chuckle.

“That’s a first. Be careful what you wish for, sweetheart.”

He backed out of the elevator, finally allowing the doors to close. You stared at him as heat rushed to your face, capturing a glimpse of his growing smirk until he was no longer in sight.

Katsuki Bakugou was a selfish man.

And oh, did you love every bit of him.

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[sassenach77yle]

7x10 “Brotherly Love”

He’d lost people before. Some of them dearly loved, more than life itself. But now he’d lost himself.

He walked slowly back toward his house in a numb daze. He hadn’t slept since the news had come, save in the snatches of complete physical exhaustion, slumped in the chair on Mercy Woodcock’s porch, waking disoriented, sticky with sap from the sycamores in her yard and covered with the tiny green caterpillars that swung down from the leaves on invisible strands of silk.“Lord John.” He became aware of an insistent voice, and with it, the realization that whoever was speaking had called his name several times already. He stopped, and turned to find himself facing Captain Richardson. His mind went quite blank. Possibly his face had, too, for Richardson took him by the arm in a most familiar manner and drew him into an ordinary.“Come with me,” Richardson said in a low voice, releasing his arm, but jerking his head toward the stair. Faint stirrings of curiosity and wariness made themselves felt through the haze that wrapped him, but he followed, the sound of his shoes hollow in the wooden stairwell.Richardson closed the door of the room behind him and began speaking before Grey could gather his wits to begin questioning him regarding the very peculiar circumstances William had recounted.

“Mrs. Fraser,” Richardson said without preamble. “How well do you know her?”Grey was so taken aback by this that he answered.“She is the wife—the widow”—he corrected himself, feeling as though he had stuck a pin into a raw wound—“of a good friend.”“A good friend,” Richardson repeated, with no particular emphasis. The man could scarcely look more nondescript, Grey thought, and had a sudden creeping vision of Hubert Bowles. The most dangerous spies were men whom no one would look at twice.“A good friend,” Grey repeated firmly. “His political loyalties are no longer an issue, are they?”“Not if he’s truly dead, no,” Richardson agreed. “You think he is?”“I am quite sure of it. What is it you wish to know, sir? I have business.”Richardson smiled a little at this patently false statement.“I propose to arrest the lady as a spy, Lord John, and wished to be certain that there was no … personal attachment on your part, before I did so.”Grey sat down, rather abruptly, and braced his hands on the table.“I—she—what the devil for?” he demanded.Richardson courteously sat down opposite him.“She has been passing seditious materials to and fro all over Philadelphia for the last three months—possibly longer. And before you ask, yes, I’m sure. One of my men intercepted some of the material; have a look, if you like.” He reached into his coat and withdrew an untidy wad of papers, these looking to have passed through several hands. Grey didn’t think Richardson was practicing upon him, but took his time in deliberate examination. He put down the papers, feeling bloodless.“I heard that the lady had been received at your house, and that she is often at the house where your nephew abides,” Richardson said. His eyes rested on Grey’s face, intent. “But she is not a … friend?”“She is a physician,” Grey said, and had the small satisfaction of seeing Richardson’s brows shoot up. “She has been of—of the greatest service to me and my nephew.” It occurred to him that it was likely better that Richardson did not know how much esteem he might hold for Mrs. Fraser, as if he thought there was a personal interest, he would immediately cease to give Grey information. “That is ended, though,” he added, speaking as casually as possible. “I respect the lady, of course, but there is no attachment, no.” He rose then, in a decided manner, and took his leave, for to ask more questions would compromise the impression of indifference.

He set off toward Walnut Street, no longer numb. He felt once more himself, strong and determined. There was, after all, one more service he might perform for Jamie Fraser.

“YOU MUST MARRY me,” he repeated.

I’d heard him the first time, but it made no more sense upon repetition.

I stuck a finger in one ear and wiggled it, then repeated the process with the other.“You can’t possibly have said what I think you said.”

“Indeed I did,” he said, his normal dry edge returning.

The numbness of shock was beginning to wear off, and something horrible was beginning to crawl out of a small hole in my heart. I couldn’t look at that and took refuge in staring at Lord John.“I know I’m shocked,” I told him, “but I’m sure I’m neither delusional nor hearing things. Why the bloody hell are you saying that, for God’s sake?!” I rose abruptly, wanting to strike him. He saw it and took a smart step back.“You are going to marry me,” he said, a fierce edge in his voice. “Are you aware that you are about to be arrested as a spy?”“I—no.” I sat down again, as abruptly as I’d stood up. “What… why?”“You would know that better than I would,” he said coldly.In fact, I would. I repressed the sudden flutter of panic that threatened to overwhelm me, thinking of the papers I had conveyed secretly from one pair of hands to another in the cover of my basket, feeding the secret network of the Sons of Liberty.“Even if that were true,” I said, struggling to keep my own voice level, “why the bloody hell would I marry you? Let alone why you would want to marry me, which I don’t believe for an instant.”“Believe it,” he advised me briefly. “I will do it because it is the last service I can render Jamie Fraser. I can protect you; as my wife, no one can touch you. And you will do it because…” He cast a bleak glance behind me, raising his chin, and I looked around to see all four of Fergus’s children huddled in the doorway, the girls and Henri-Christian watching me with huge, round eyes. Germain was looking straight at Lord John, fear and defiance plain on his long, handsome face.“Them, too?” I asked, taking a deep breath and turning to meet his gaze. “You can protect them, too?”“Yes.”“I—yes. All right.”

I rested both hands flat on the counter, as though that somehow could keep me from spinning off into space.

“When?”“Now,” he said, and took my elbow. “There is no time to lose.”

93 A SERIES OF SHORT, SHARP SHOCKS ~ An Echo in the Bone

[pancake404]

The False God's Limbo: BBI Catnap and Dogday

A little bit more of character information regarding the False God's Limbo.

Catnap/Theodore: After ten years of hunting down heretics, worshiping his only friend and God, roaming Playcare, slowly starving, and the cherry on top, the reminder of his past death with the Prototype executing him, Theo is a shadow of his original self. He doesn't feel remorseful nor pleased with his past actions as at the end of the day, they were just heretics that he had to deal with.

Catnap is cold, drained, reserved, and often described as emotionless. He has no issue speaking as it doesn't affect his throat whatsoever unlike before but he normally only talks when he feels he needs to. He doesn't care about most of the other experiments, and he especially stopped caring about the BBI Smiling Critters. To him, they're not the Smiling Critters, they are just other lab rats like him that just look like the Smiling Critters. Despite not caring though, Catnap is more than willing to threaten those that push his buttons.

However, when interacting with BBI Dogday, the heretic, Catnap decided that since he can't kill him or himself(or get out of the place), he might as well stick with one of the only familiar experiments. Though, he doesn't understand why Dogday is willingly dragging him with, it's not like he has anywhere else to go. Not only that, but he also does find that there are other toys that still have some devotion to the Prototype side and he figured that as the main devotee and priest, he feels like he has some responsibility in protecting them.

Essentially:

It's not that he is happy with what he did, he just doesn't have a reason to care. He behaves like a lost monster who has no purpose anymore.

Dogday/Samuel Lee(Sticking with this identity of BBI Dogday): After being pretty much either locked up(in this version, he had only his legs ripped off at a later time than the whole ten years) or witnessing the horror of what became the other BBI Smiling Critters, he feels a sense of failure that was placed upon him as his role as the leader but also, he doesn't want to experience any of that ever again.

Dogday when encountering Catnap imminently in the limbo, neither attacked each other but more of just stared, being unsure what to do. But after Catnap tried getting out...unsuccessfully, Dogday decided to snag Catnap and drag him along to check out the limbo further where the other toys are found. His feelings of Catnap/Theo are very mixed, he feels unsure, hurt, frustrated, sympathetic, but overall, he just wished it didn't turn out like this. He sees Catnap sort of like a loyal dog(ironic, I know) being thrown away like garbage after everything they sacrificed and were willing to do, which Catnap disagrees with. But either way, he views this Limbo as maybe a second chance for all the toys to try to move on without the threat of every toy for themselves in the factory. Though the question is if everyone else sees it that same way(spoiler, they don't).

Dogday is on edge though optimistic. He won't take crap but also has some personal nightmares(such as...you know, Chapter Three). He also doesn't want to fail at being a leader again which is difficult as there are...certain things that the other Smiling Critters(very much including Catnap) know about and therefore, they don't fully trust him.

Essentially:

It's not like Dogday isn't upset, it's just...the others(Catnap included) have reasons to not like him either. He also prefers forgiveness for a better way forward than constant battle of survival which is both made possible and impossible in this Limbo.

When thinking of their relationship, I've seen a lot of ideas such as never-ending fights and hatred over the other, a long time for forgiveness but eventually a happier ending, etc. But for this version, I'd say it's less of finally forgiving the other(mostly Catnap redemption and Dogday forgiving) but more of "Can we be friends this time?" sort of thing if that makes sense. Lastly, in this version, there are dirt that can be made for all the Smiling Critters.

Also, both are drained from the decade being in the factory and they're sort of more glad it's finally over.

[breakyourrxles]

❥between two breaths (m) | 𝟟

𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥

↳ Lulled into a false sense of security, disaster strikes MVNE in a way that feels far too close to home, and as a result, you lose just that much more willingness to make the decisions that you know you should.

kim sunwoo x fem!reader (side lee juyeon x reader) — idol!sunwoo, fan/trainee!reader. forced proximity, forbidden love, friends to lovers, angst, slow burn, idolverse-typical themes regarding; dating, image, public perception, etc. happy ending, plot-heavy!! reader thinks she's nonchalant about it but she rly isn't. smut. [6,2k wc ongoing] cws: heavy themes of wanting-but-can't-having, mild jealousy, explicit sexual content, a little alcohol consumption, dancing on the edge of career suicide, poor decision making because of The Wanting.

❥ masterlist | ao3

Woori huffs out a chuckle from under her breath and says, "Some of us are a little more bound to the rules of hierarchy than others. I've witnessed that with my very own eyes."

For reasons that you cannot quite come to understand, content filmed with Juyeon is incredibly well-received.

MVNE's comeback is slated for early March, and with only a few days remaining of February you have spent far more time with him than the man you are actually friends with.

However, training with Juyeon has been easy and incredibly lucrative. He is kind and talented and happy to lend what he can to you to the best of his ability. He is not pushy; does not think himself to be better than or above you in any conceivable way, and though the two of you had entered this circumstance with little intention of actualized growth, you realize that you have, in fact, benefited greatly from his services.

There are other more pressing matters to tend to, though.

You need to talk to Woori, and doing so in a private setting just for the two of you has proven to be incredibly difficult over the past few months. It has become increasingly unusual for any of you to be in situations where there are no prying ears that may be able to overhear a conversation, and any singular moments of such are quickly ended by a manager or another member quickly shuffling through and breaking any privacy that you may have found.

Thus, you will have to force the issue, because this cannot go on for any longer without knowledge of where everything currently stands.

Vocal training is less tiresome this comeback on account of being heavily dance-performance based. The debut was a song meant to showcase those skills, and now MVNE will round out to showcase a different set of them. It will highlight members like you, Woori and another girl—Hyemi—who is something of an all-arounder, though you've not had much chance to garner closeness with her compared to some of the other members in the group.

It's still early on and in all fairness to her, you consider this a fairly expected occurrence. With so many women in a group and little time spent during the actual trainee process, the majority of you are still effectively strangers to each other. You don't share a dorm with Hyemi, and unlike Woori, she has not had the misfortune of dealing with all of your unexpected and undesired situations, either.

You do still remember her, though. As one of the girls who sat giggling in the shadows when the details of your previous involvement with Sunwoo began to rear its ugly head.

Water under the bridge, or so you would like to believe.

The producer finally calls the day once Miyoung finishes a line after only a handful of takes. You and Woori sit on the leather couch together and alternate between cheering her on and scrolling through your phones as to not make her so nervous that she cannot focus, and while the producer gives Miyoung feedback, you take this as your only opportunity to finally put an end to the torment of the unknown that has festered in your mind ever since then.

You lean over slightly to her and say, "Can we talk privately after this?"

Woori stops scrolling, her eyes pop up from the screen and stare ahead as if she is somewhat confused by this offering. "Sure, I'll tell her to go ahead when we're all finished up."

Miyoung waves as she meanders down the hall, leaving only you and your leader remaining there. Neither of your managers are all that thrilled about being asked to leave the both of you to it, but with little risk assessed of the situation, they agree and head for the elevator themselves.

When the coast is clear, all of the performative confidence that Woori has drains from her figure. Her shoulders droop, an exhausted sigh leaves her, and she slumps herself lazily against the wall.

"What did you want to talk about?"

The question confuses you, because how could she not know the purpose of your gathering here today? It seems sincere, and her attention remains firmly focused on you as she awaits your response. Thus, you have no other option than to take it in good faith, inhale a sharp breath that you hope gives you the strength to once again revisit this, and you say, "That night. At the party."

"I thought we already talked about it, we talked about it then. What's left?"

"Have you… told anyone else about it?"

Woori's face immediately twists into a grimace and without a moment of silence following the question she quickly replies, "What? No! Of course not, why would I tell anyone?"

"I just didn't know if any of the other girls—"

"Look," Woori interjects quickly, "I'm none too thrilled about it, but going around and gossiping about it isn't going to make it better, and would likely only make things worse." She bobbles her head amusedly a bit, eyebrows perking up like she's sort of having fun with the whole idea now and then says, "I have concerns, sure, but that's for me to worry about, not anyone else. We will handle the situation, we are the only ones that need to know about the extent of it, especially in the event that this gets… Well, messier than what you think it will be. Which is likely."

"Likely?" you reiterate, mildly slighted by the assumption.

"Yes, likely. If it happens once, who's to say it won't happen again."

Oops.

"And then," Woori goes on to say, "Who's to say it won't continue, or become even more of a thing. I know you said it won't but it's a dangerous game to play. There's the logic of it versus everything else, and let's be honest; you're interested."

You swallow hard. "I wouldn't say I'm interested."

"If you weren't, it never would have happened to begin with. If you weren't, you probably never would have been his fan to begin with," Woori reasons. "I get it, and as much as it kind of terrifies me and the future of this group, I'm not going to sit here and play dumb about the whole thing; pretend that anyone saying it's a bad idea is going to magically talk some sense into you and nothing will ever happen again. Maybe you're that delusional, but it's at least good if one of us isn't."

"I'm not delusional!" you say, though there is hardly enough bite in your tone to make it sound even remotely believable. She is reading you to completion, and there's little you can do to dampen the blow.

She gives you a knowing look. "Just… Do me a favor and try to be smart about whatever it is that you're going to do, and if nothing else happens, then great! But if it does, just try to remember that your choices are going to impact a lot of people, not just yourself. About nineteen other people, in fact, but who's counting?"

When she finishes, silence finds the hallway between you. The two of you look at one another for a long moment, as if an unspoken agreement is being made at this very moment. Woori is logical and reasonable; isn't interested in trying to micromanage and determine your life. You appreciate this about her, though in an effort to understand the source of her acceptance, you cannot help but ask the most obvious and pressing question left behind.

"Why does it sound like you're giving me permission to do this?"

Woori pushes herself off the wall and once again finds the wherewithal to maintain her typically poised stature. She looks at you, smiles and simply says, "Because you're going to do whatever it is that you want to do anyway. They always do."

"The final TikTok," Juyeon announces through an alleviated huff, "Good riddance."

The dance studio is humid and the air is heavy with the remnants of many hours spent practicing for the final time together. Your shirt is soaked through with sweat, Juyeon's hair sticks in black pieces to his forehead, and empty bottles of water litter the sidelines after having long since served their purpose.

It's bittersweet in a lot of ways. Over the weeks, your relationship with Juyeon has easily transformed from that of strictly colleagues to something far more familiar to you as a friendship. Being around him feels so natural, and Juyeon is kind and gentle in ways that might come as a surprise to those less knowledgeable and only basing their assumption off of his appearance. In reality, Juyeon is funny and personable; you enjoy your time with him on the days that you are scheduled to have it, and now find yourself mourning the future loss of that as a part of work in your life.

He posts the last video and tiredly makes his way over towards you. With his back against the wall, he takes a sip from a crushed water bottle and then glances down to say, "Content aside, it's a little unfortunate that this is coming to an end. It's nice to spend some time with someone that isn't the same people I see every single day."

"It's been nice," you agree, perching up beside him similarly. "I don't know, maybe we can keep doing it. Talk to our managers, it's obviously been helping me, but it's probably a hard sell to make it worth your time to them if not for the content portion of it all."

With the bottle pressed to his lips, Juyeon smirks. "Well, they don't have to know everything we do every second of the day, either."

Curiously, your eyebrow perks up and you look towards him. "Are you suggesting we sneak off together and engage in scandalous activities such as… dance practice?"

"I might be." 

And it is easy, you know this better than perhaps even he does. The amount of sneaking around that Sunwoo has done prior to your life now, and even just the amount of time you and him have managed to attain since then just goes to show the simplicity of carving out the precise right slot in the day to do whatever it is that you might set your sights on doing. However, the thought of Sunwoo lingers in your mind once it enters, as does his hopeful insistence of the two of you continuing to engage in activities that neither of you should be doing at all. What Juyeon is proposing is the kind of thing that would garner a displeased slap on the wrist from management but otherwise, would be forgotten just as quickly as it would be found out. What Sunwoo is proposing, however, could become an avalanche of misfortune with insurmountable collateral damage.

So why have you not told him no yet?

"Of course," Juyeon starts, cutting through your thoughts, "I understand the trainee life and that of women especially is much more precarious than where I stand now. You have a lot more to lose, so I don't really blame you if you don't want to push your luck."

"Oh, you know about women's lives in the industry, do you?" you reply, playfully doubtful in tone.

"Naturally," he says, a sharp glance once again finding you. "I have dated since becoming an idol, after all."

For reasons entirely unbeknownst to you, this information comes as a surprise. It shouldn't, not by any logical metric, but you cannot help the welling curiosity that begins to bubble up inside of you as you scan over his features for any hint of jest that he may be offering you. There is none.

"And how did that go?" you question plainly, hoping to play off your budding interest in the topic.

Juyeon shrugs and says, "The way it typically goes. It wasn't anything serious, which is also the way these things typically go."

You mouth an ah in response before verbally replying. "Right. A means to an end."

"Not necessarily. You make it sound so… mechanical. So robotic." He laughs, finishes the remaining water and then lazily tosses it towards the pile of the rest. "It's less like that—at least for me—and more like… I can genuinely care for someone and have interest in them but still understand that we're both involved in a lifestyle that doesn't really lend itself to any meaningful outcome, you know? Who knows, maybe if we weren't doing this then it could have been something long-term, but we are doing it, and it can't, so it just is what it is."

"Are you seeing anyone now?"

The question falls from your lips before you have a chance to think twice about it, before you have the opportunity to reconsider whether or not it is even appropriate for you to ask. Mortified by your shortsightedness, you rush to amend the misstep but before you are able to get the words out, Juyeon is already leaning towards you with squinting, menacing eyes and minutely upturned corners of his lips that appear so sly and calculated.

"Wouldn't you like to know."

The two of you have been in close proximity before, though not without the limiting veil of work hanging heavily between you. Now, Juyeon's face is close enough that you can easily see the detailed handiwork of the stylist that has applied dark, shimmery shadows to his eyes and a fine line to the corners to aid in elongating them. A sinister stage persona—devilish in appearance but so different from the person that you have since discovered him to be.

Your breath sits caught in your throat, and you are rescued by the sound of the door being abruptly shoved open and a familiar voice echoing through the otherwise quiet space.

"You have to come with me to a schedule tomorrow, Kevin doesn't want to go because he isn't feeling well and—Oh."

Snapping to attention, you look in the direction from which the voice has come, and though you're a little thankful for the interruption… It certainly could have been pretty much anyone else.

Sunwoo stands only a few footsteps inside, the door automatically closing behind him. He blinks a few times without saying a word, but that is short-lived, as you would expect it to be. "Uh, hello? Did I fuckin' interrupt something?"

His voice lends a comical aid, rather than something angry like the words might suggest. You do, however, know better than to hinge all of your trust in regards to Sunwoo's feelings on any particular thing on his immediate, in the moment delivery.

"No! We were just talking, don't be ridiculous," you say. "Why do you always have to jump to the weirdest case scenario?"

"Uh, looks pretty fuckin' weird to me," Sunwoo says, crinkling his nose in disgust. "He's all looming and limbs. Scary."

You look back at Juyeon, who rolls his eyes and shrugs before making his way towards Sunwoo. He makes an attempt to throw an arm around Sunwoo's shoulders, a gesture that is quickly rebuffed, and gives up fairly easily after that.

"You don't have anything to worry about," Juyeon says, face leaned down towards Sunwoo's face. They are making their way away from you and towards the door, and though you can't see the entirety of Juyeon's expression, you can make out enough of that lighthearted predisposition for trouble that lets you know he is about to set this whole thing up in flames. He makes another attempt to wrap an arm around Sunwoo, and though it is ardently fought off he says, "After all, we're just friends."

Sunwoo reels and jolts himself out of Juyeon's grasp in ways that you can only describe as cartoonish. He is babbling and cursing through Juyeon's exuberant giggles, and though the gall to make such a joke is not lost on you, Sunwoo's precious sensibilities in relation to it have long fallen to the wayside in favor of hearty laughter; watching on as Sunwoo chases the culprit around the room with viciously murderous intent.

Three days later, you wake up to the sound of loud, frantic pounding against your closed bedroom door.

You are tired and startled, shooting upright in your bed and to the point that you nearly bang your head against the wooden frame that holds the topmost bunk. This is all a little incomprehensible to you immediately; what day it is, what time it is, whether or not any of this is even happening at all, but even though the noise stops for a moment, it begins again with little more repreve.

So, you call out to grant yourself time and give acknowledgement of some sort of message being received. You shuffle your sweatpants on and wrangle a sweatshirt that may or may not be backwards but based on the urgency of the sound, that's of little consequence to you right now.

The door swings open, Miyoung and Nara are standing just in front with phones in hand and abject concern splashed across their faces. They look nothing short of absolutely horrified and for a split second, your stomach simply drops.

"Something happened," Miyoung says, and then presents to you the article brought up on the screen. "Woori is coming soon, we have to go in for a meeting right now."

Reading over the text, your stomach continues to fall but your anxiety dissipates ever so slightly. This is bad, very bad for the lot of you but… not for you in particular. There is always a chance, some inkling of a possibility that some misdoing of yours is somehow going to trickle out from its containment and find its way into the hands of people that it does not need to be. That is not the case today. At least, not for you.

This does, however, explain a lot of previous threads of confusion.

"Where is Hyemi?" you ask.

"At her dorm," Nara says. Her arms are crossed over her chest and she appears to be a little less concerned and far more amused by all of this. Suppose you land somewhere in between. "Which is probably for the best. I can't believe that after everything, we're still going through this."

Fair enough, because your name is mentioned in the article but only in a passing acknowledgment of the connection between the two. You blink slowly and then read through the article a quick second time, just to make sure you're understanding all of this correctly. Really, there's no mistaking it, though.

The post is from a gossip news site that, while not wholly reputable, is reputable enough that people follow it and most certainly use it to keep up with celebrity happenings. It alleges that MVNE member Hyemi has lived a previous secret life of being a dedicated fansite of a currently active male idol group—something she has decided to keep under wraps in hope of it never seeing the light of day—and is now being forced out into the spotlight in the most distasteful and unbecoming ways.

There are photos included. Screenshots of her fansite and pictures of her at events with her equipment and other friends presumably doing much of the same. Why she would attempt to hide this, you cannot begin to understand, but the group in question has done numerous appearances alongside The Boyz, and suddenly, everything during your trainee days begins to come together with the final recovered puzzle piece.

She has seen you before, and perhaps, had been hoping to use this knowledge against you in an effort to gain the upperhand.

Your mention in the article is incredibly brief, only a callback to the fact that you have similar fandom backgrounds but chose to be transparent about this fact from the very beginning. A little ironic, you think, the voice chosen throughout, because it was hardly a choice you had made of your own and rather a hand forced in an effort to minimize future scenarios just like this one.

Turns out that was the correct decision, after all.

A knock comes at the front door of your dorm and Nara rushes off to answer it. There are a couple of girls' voices heard—Woori's in particular—and so you and Miyoung make the decision to join them rather than lingering in the doorway.

Head bowed, Hyemi stands behind Woori with an obvious reluctance to enter.

"You could have just been honest," Nara says straight away, and the anger in her voice is evident though she is clearly making an attempt to reel it back. "You weren't even the only one, you saw that the company was going to be able to handle it. We could have mitigated all of this, and now we're just going through it regardless of any other effort made. Why weren't you just honest?"

Woori's eyes cast towards her, a stern look apt for a leadership role. She doesn't say anything, but the point is still made: Take it easy.

"I'm sorry," Hyemi says. Her tone is soft, voice broken and meek and no ability to meet the eyes of anyone else in attendance of her lashing. "I just… I didn't want anyone to know. I was scared."

"You were perfectly happy to let everyone know about my history," you say.

This must strike something particular inside of her. Hyemi's attention snaps to you, eyebrows furrowed in a sort of disdainful way and she abruptly answers, "We were trainees and it was cutthroat! I was going to do whatever it took to make sure I was able to debut."

"Wow," Nara says, head shaking slowly, "So, you really were trying to get her eliminated by spreading that rumor."

"Well, it wasn't much of a rumor, was it? It was true! I never lied, I didn't make anything up. I thought there was no chance that the company would allow a fan of one of their senior idols to debut in a group, so it wasn't meant to turn into such a big situation. If they had made the right choice—to eliminate her—then even if my history came to light then it wouldn't look so bad with nothing to compare it to. How was I supposed to know that these people were happy to leverage it for some fun, quirky little story?"

"I don't think talking about this right now is going to get us anywhere," Woori interjects. "We have to go in for a meeting to discuss what this is going to mean for all of us moving forward and how they're going to handle it from here on out. We have a festival appearance in five days that we have to focus on. We really don't have time to lend to this right now."

"So, what? I just have to pretend that she wasn't trying to ruin my career because it suited her own, personal narrative? I have to pretend that everything is fine?" you question.

Looking directly at you, there is something knowing and apprehensive in Woori's gaze. Deep down, you know precisely what it is meant to convey. A silent insistence to stand down, because you are standing far from a place of higher ground. The rest of the members may not know it, but the two of you most certainly do.

Hyemi made a poor choice when the two of you were strangers and being a trainee felt something akin to a life or death situation. You have made a choice now, and the feeling of Sunwoo's hair tangled between your fingers is not something you have easily forgotten.

"Yeah," Woori eventually says, her tone pointed and knowing. "That's exactly what you're going to do. Welcome to being an idol."

Tensions are high backstage, and with no particularly interested eyes glued to your every minute movement, you are allowed to express your feelings precisely as they come to you within these private, confined walls.

It is always best to put on a happy face with and in front of staff, and you are happy to do so. The people in charge of making sure that you present to the fans as the best possible version of yourself are everything you could have ever hoped for; lovely and kind, fun and thoughtful and you genuinely enjoy being around them. The rest of the girls are laughing and talking amongst themselves around you as they dress and primp themselves for the inevitable performance that awaits you soon, though Hyemi sits relatively quiet in comparison and evidently still tormented by whatever the future holds.

On the company side, they will handle it to the best of their ability but as a result of the way that the information has come out, there is little that they can do to circumvent it. The rest is up to the fans and the various people who happen to stumble across it. Admittedly, the general perception is not kind, and part of that is in contrast to you.

She should have just been honest about it, one comment had said. The other girl admitted her past and we all laughed and moved on, why couldn't she do the same?

It's not even an idol in the same company, another user posted. This is so embarrassing for her now. Being sneaky and trying to hide it but eventually, it all comes out, doesn't it?

It's weird to debut girls who have a history of being fangirls already, but at least the SW fan came out with it honestly and didn't try to hide. That can at least be respected.

You close the browser tab, set your phone down, and catch Woori's eyes from beside you in the reflection of the mirror.

She is watching you intently, but this is far from the kind of place to engage in any sort of discussion about the topic. From where you sit, you can see the way that she is nervously chewing at the inside of her cheek, eyes still fixed on you as if there is something that she desperately wishes to say, but can't.

So, you inhale sharply and simply say, "It's fine. We're all gonna move on from this."

"I know that, but I also know what contempt looks like when I see it."

You search for Hyemi in the reflection, seated off to the back corner and alone as she scrolls through her phone solemnly. No doubt reading much of the same comments that you were just now.

"Am I not allowed that?"

"You are, but divisiveness within the group isn't going to do any of us any favors. You're going to have to let it go."

"I know, and I will, but you'll have to forgive me for still feeling as though it's fairly fresh," you say. "It hasn't even been a week. I was forced into a situation where I had to put all of my business out for public scrutiny regardless of my feelings about it by someone who had been doing the same."

"And you came out on top as a result of it," Woori reasons, turning her attention to her own reflection now. "Hyemi is being eaten alive by public perception and you are being heralded as this strong bastion of honesty." Her eyes find you again, but this time there is a coyness to her expression. "Is that really fair?"

You know as well as she does that the answer is no, because there are many skeletons that linger in your closet. Sinister, and far more disastrous secrets that could easily spell the end for your career in its entirety. No more media play, no more discussions on how to move forward; it could very well be the nail in the coffin. The only thing standing between you and that fate is Woori, Sunwoo, and a dash of luck.

Though your stomach twists at the thought, Woori's ambient insistence of the fact carries truth. It isn't fair for you to hold this against Hyeri as much as you seem to be, and eventually, you are simply going to have to get over it. Sooner, rather than later.

Still, you want. You are angry, and the offering of something beyond what has been previously explored still sits somewhere in the back of your mind no matter how many times you have made the effort to completely dispel it. Bad choices have been made, but far better ones have won out and with much more frequency than even you would prefer. At some point, you wonder if the thread is going to snap, and then the pieces must simply fall where they may.

You can't avoid Sunwoo forever, and though you have the ultimate option of telling him that enough is enough and that this must not continue to move forward, you have not done so; nor can you seem to muster up the ability to.

And worst of all: A part of you believes that you can get away with it.

"All I'm saying," Woori begins again, "Is try to take it easy on her. You guys are stuck together, and who knows what might happen in the future."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She shoots you a look, one that implies that the both of you know very well what it is that she is referring to. 

"It means that I've got my work cut out for me, and I'd like for MVNE to have a little bit of a stronger foothold in the industry before something tries to bring it all crashing down."

The response dissatisfies you, though there is little that you can say given your current surroundings. Your attention leaves her and instead settles on the reflection ahead. Anger rears itself inside of you, skin prickling ever so slightly at the desire to express yourself in all of the ways that you absolutely cannot. Everything is appearances now. Outside of the company building or your home, you have no ability to conduct yourself as anything less than perfectly becoming.

Now, that fact is making your stomach turn.

"Would be nice if I wasn't the only one on the receiving end of such criticisms," you say, firm and resolute in your convictions. You don't need to name any names, because you know perfectly well that your leader is more than capable of threading the needle of suggestion. "But I guess hierarchy doesn't allow for such a thing, does it?"

And as if the words roll off her back without so much as a second thought, Woori huffs out a chuckle from under her breath and says, "Some of us are a little more bound to the rules of hierarchy than others. I've witnessed that with my very own eyes."

There is less than ten minutes until call, and in the narrow corridors backstage bodies are crammed between equipment in an attempt to keep everyone precisely where they need to be. 

Over twenty idols stand there in the enclosed space—including MVNE—and your senior group are quickly being shuffled to join the fray. There are staff members everywhere; venue people, sound people, visual coordinators, managers and last minute stylists meant to make sure every hair and piece of fabric is exactly where it needs to be once the audience's eyes fall upon it. Your group is meant to go first, the minutes are ticking by faster than you can even fathom, and more than anything is that mixture of anger and adrenaline that relentlessly still courses through your veins.

Your attention is not on any one thing or person in particular, and your thoughts are lost on the conversation you had with Woori only a short time prior. Her words repeatedly cycle through your head, each time only adding more and more to the contempt that has already been festering inside of you. 

The lights are low here, and visibility is so incredibly limited that you have noticed that the venue staff have little other option than to aid in getting the idols up the stairs and towards the stage. You can barely even make out the expression of the girls to either side of you, much less those of the people further up ahead. A sliver of light shines in from the opening leading up and out from this place, but does little to illuminate where you stand as of now.

Murmurs amongst groupmates fall away in favor of a loud, booming sound system that displays a VCR on the screen for the audience to enjoy. The crowd springs to attention, their cheers crashing in and serving as an aid to ready you for this upcoming performance. Soon, you will go on stage and pretend that absolutely nothing is wrong behind the scenes, that everything is perfect and the ten of you could not be any happier being together like this. Fanservice will be displayed between you and your leader, Hyemi will smile and do aegyo and thank everyone wholeheartedly for coming without ever alluding to the fact that a dark cloud of distruth hangs widely over her head. Tonight, you all will play pretend. Tonight, you will put on your very best performance thus far.

A staff member calls out eight minutes from somewhere, though it's impossible to place them. It's too dark, too loud; all of your senses are overstimulated.

Then, a hand wraps tightly around your wrist and you are firmly yanked away from your current standing position.

You think to scream, yet cannot even manage to, making your best attempt to not stumble to your knees as you desperately find your footing. Instead, a curse drops from your mouth before you have the opportunity to consider it unbecoming of an idol at an event, and what that grants you in response is a voice that is all too familiar.

"Relax," it says.

The word can barely be heard over all of the other noise, but you know it for what it is as soon as it leaves the lips that have uttered it. Your head is spinning with disorientation by the time you are capable of standing on your own without help, but just as quickly, your back is shoved up against a wall; hands are tightly gripped against either side of your waist as if you give you no hope of ever escaping them, and soft known lips once again find your own.

And worst of all, you give in. You give in to it all. Though your surroundings are pertinent to you, you allow yourself to have this and relish in everything being offered. Your own hands match Sunwoo's placement on you, pulling him closer and harsher against your body. He must not be expecting it, because you feel a gentle curve of his lips against yours as if surprisingly pleased by his findings. This is insane, this is dangerous, but most of all; it is intoxicating. 

Sunwoo holds himself against you with a kind of confident insistence that you don't have the wherewithal to withstand. The fragrance clinging to his skin is potent and does little to assist you in gathering your strength to put any sort of end to this, and that is only compounded once his lips smooth down to your jaw, and continue a warm, premeditated path along the column of your neck.

"Makeup," you say, the best that you can do with the way your mind is racing. 

He smiles against the skin, lips pressing and teeth lightly nipping just below your ear. "You think I don't know that?" he says.

With no more strength left in you to fight this, your head falls back against the wall and grants him full access to that which he desires. You've fought this—perhaps not to the best of your ability—but god does it feel so good to just give in and let go.

Sunwoo's hands smooth from your waist around to your back, pulling you impossibly tighter against his hips. There is next to no space left between your bodies to be spoken of. A silent hunger for something previously dismissed now the driving force within an engagement that should not be taking place at all.

This is not the time nor the place, and Sunwoo expresses the notion just as much as you know it to be true.

His lips find the shell of your ear, your skin tingles at the sensation of warm breath cascading across the flesh there. He says, "Please see me later, after this." Tonally however, his insistence is desperate. Begging not far off from being an operative word for it. His mouth presses into your neck again before you have the chance to reply, his hips offering a slightly more pertinent and expressive press against your own in such a way that any convictions you might have had about the plea immediately melt away in favor of something far more risky and duly desired. "No one will know," he says against the skin, "Our little secret."

Sunwoo comes up again, kisses you on the mouth with a sort of feral hunger you've not yet felt from him, and with barely even a second to catch a glimpse of the cunning grin plastered across his face once he pulls himself away from you he just as quickly shoves you back out into the sea of hustling, endlessly moving bodies of people; little more to take away from it all than the lingering feeling of his body against yours and a heavy question of where it will be that you find yourself in the late hours of the night.