#This turned out longer that i expected
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a thought. everyone agrees that sundayâs wings express his emotions more than heâd want to, just like tails of animals (or dragons⌠staring at dan heng il)
so imagine, sunday boarding the astral express, to see the universe in a new light, to have a fresh perspective on things, to try and change the way he views himself. he lets himself loose a little, his body less stiff as he lets his guard down around the crew (that is, including you). he doesnât try to smile all the time, doesnât try to control his body as much as he did in the past, his halo glowing more or less depending on his mood and his wings⌠twitching from time to time. as the head of the oak family, he had to be composed at all times and never let his facade slip. but now, as just another traveler wondering through the cosmos, heâs free of all the responsibilities. as he grew accustomed to this new life the astral express has offered him, you began to notice tiny changes in his behaviour. those were details, really, but you couldnât help yourself but smile whenever you looked at him. he seemed more alive, now that he was out of his cage. his eyes look liked two shining suns, instead of cold gold, smile less forced, steps unsure, but more free. and your favourite part; his wings. they would always flutter when he laughed, and you prayed to akivili that heâd never learn about this, only so you could see that sight more often. sometimes, when talking to someone (especially you), that same thing would happen again. and you had to try your best not to crack a laugh, because how could he be so adorable without even realising that? it felt like you were staring at a very cute dog wagging its tail whenever you approached it. another detail you almost missed - his sweet tooth. whenever pom-pom said something about desserts, a spark would ignite in the halovianâs eyes, barely noticeable. every time heâd get a taste of that sweetness he so seemed to love, heâd look like a giddy child. the way he smiled, you just wanted to grab him and kiss his lips. how could someone be so cute and unaware of that charm?
#Hsr x reader#hsr#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail#sunday x reader#sunday hsr#Rambles#iâm in love with this man#This turned out longer that i expected#Saru actually writing something? no way#divider credits: adornedwithlight
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in which johnny gifts the love of his life a sex toy outta nowhere
when you mumble into the phone that you miss him, johnny, he pauses for a second, then tells you he's going to bring you a gift back home. "to keep ye company, hen." after, he locks himself in a bathroom stall and watches you play with yourself until you both come.
but you'd thought he'd bring you a pet. a live animal that needs a cage to be brought across the world, not a long, slim unmarked box.
it's a sex toy. and it's rather large, at that. your hand wraps around the base, fingertips still a good inch apart.
"and i'm supposed to be using that?" his arms wrap around your waist, his thick stubble grazing the sensitive skin of your neck, raising goose flesh.
"don't like it? only had ye in mind, hen." he presses a wet kiss on your fluttering pulse. you've never really talked about toys in your relationship. you don't need them, of course, and johnny more than makes up for the time lost between you two whenever he's home but this?
"i don't know," you mumble. "a bullet would've made more sense, i think. at most a rose." his hands run up your sides, to the swell of your breasts and give you a gentle squeeze. he doesn't believe the tripe of people valuing size over all else, does he? the thing is easily as thick as your forearm and it's corded with veins. and it's uncut. whoever is making these are going to extreme lengths to make it as realistic as possible.
he bucks his hips, prominent bulge in his jeans coming to rest in the small of your back. of course he'd get excited. menace.
"ye willnae have t'use it alone now tha' i'm here. 'sides, i think ye'd look perfect with my pretty kitty stretched thin around it." johnny grabs your hips firmly, creating small divots as his grip tightens. "maybe i'll watch ye fuck yerself on it, hm? lap at yer clit while ye do." liquid heat pools in your belly, pulsing hot between your legs.
he really wants you to use it, given by his ragged breathing and he rutting himself against you. fine. "okay. just, not right now, yeah? i want only you in me." his eyes burn fluorescent as he nods, his large hand cradling your head as he pulls you in for a kiss.
you missed this. the sweet sting of his cock sliding home in your aching cunt, the sharp pinch below your navel when his tip comes to sit snugly against the plug of your womb. you've missed this. missed him.
maybe he'll forget all about that monstrosity sitting in the box.
-
he doesn't. he's bringing it up hours later, his spend still dripping warm on your thighs. johnny cannot be serious.
"course i am, hen." his fingers sweep at the hair stuck to your sweat-slick forehead. "is it a crime to want to see ye split open on some- something else?"
you think nothing of his stutter. "alright," you groan. if that's what he wants. it'll be interesting to see just how much you can take. you'll never tell him that your pussy clenched around nothing at the thought, his cum trickling out faster, pooling on the sheets.
-
it's not warm. the tip of it presses against your swollen entrance, cold in contrast to your heated flesh. johnny watches you swallow a gasp, your trembling hands reaching for his as you slide down an inch, two, three. johnny's cum is wonderful lube, but the searing burn- the size of toy is overwhelming, your walls being wrenched apart as you glide down further. johnny presses a prickly kiss on your cheek, cooing in your ear all the while his clever fingers draw gentle circles on your clit. "focus on breathin', bonnie. yer tensin' up."
desire begins to bubble beneath your skin, pleasure causing your muscles to warm and slacken, and after a long couple of minutes, you find yourself at the base.
but then johnny grabs your hips from behind and pulls- oh. "that's it." if you'd thought the toy had originally been in your stomach, it's now in your throat. "pretty as a peach, hen. jus' wha' i wanted to see." a shiver dances up your spine, notches trembling as you get used to the unforgiving stretch of the toy. his breath warms the side of your neck. "on yer go."
you come around it no less than three times, leaving it milky and johnny cleans it up with his mouth before he cleans you up.
-
the girth of it is something you'll never get used to but it does get easier. when johnny goes back to work, he tells you that all he asks for are videos of you using it. for his collection, he greedily says.
you send him as many as you can, no matter the hours. just a quick nsfw text before getting his thumbs up and away it goes. it's incredibly fun. the relationship hadn't been dull by any means, but this just feels invigorating. you feel rejuvenated. that johnny is your biggest cheerleader while using it is such a bonus.
you oughta marry him. maybe you'll elope the next time he's home. but when the next time comes, johnny calls you instead of messaging you the usual be home soon text.
and it sends you reeling.
bonnie. the toy treat ye well while i was gone?
no better than you could me, but yeah. i'm still sore from using it in the last video i sent you.
that's great. if ye like the toy then ye'll love the real thing, i ken. we'll be there in 10.
#surprise the toy is actually a mould of his teammates cock :)#simon takes a welcome back home kiss from you#the least he can receive as payment for his generosity is your tongue in his mouth bffr#this turned out way longer than expected rip a drabble???#also rip your hole you're getting the real deal tonight#i always end up in ghoap x reader territory lmaoooo#if this is a disease i don't wanna be cured#johnny soap mctavish x reader#ghoap x reader#cod smut#ghoap x you
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Behold! One of the scrungliest creatures alive- Spamton G. Spamton, the GOAT himself
Iâve had the rough idea for this for ages, but misplaced the original sketchâŚ. But hey! Heâs done now !
#spamton#spamton g spamton#deltarune#spamton neo#deltarune fanart#drawing#artists on tumblr#anime art#my art#digital art#digital drawing#undertale#fanart#this took me longer than I expected to finish as well#but I like how he turned out!#spamton fanart#I own the plushie cause the add for it was too funny#heâs probably also one of my favourite deltarune characters tbh#I want to study this little freak under a microscope/pos
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the art of staying calm (until you're not)
#seventeen#svt#woozi#lee jihoon#svtsource#svtcreations#svtgifs#homerunj#heymax#userzaynab#usermery#maddieblr#melontrack#heyginkgo#alitracks#userngocchi#noablr#wzfct.gif#once he starts laughing he has such a hard time stopping#and his face turns so red i just wanna smush him#cuteness aggression x10000#anyway i think this little doodle effect came out cute!! i'm a very slow giffer though and it took me longer than i expected LOL
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I feel uhhh so silllyy for requesting this but what if sheep mc snapped at like the brothers cuz thereâs no way their 100+ year old asses are still acting like angsty teenagers (MC has a delusional joy momentđđđ)
It's okay, this is a very interesting request and I'm glad to do it đ
I will specifically be writing Mc as a sheep like in the manga cause tiny pissed off sheep going off on tall and powerful demons is hilarious (sorry for the wait btw)
angy Mc is funny Mc and you can't change my mind
(I headcanon that the brothers sense their sin on Mc/you btw)
-Angy Mc-
Satan was the first one to sense something was up after a few minutes after his brothers and him started arguing
At first he wasn't sure what he was sensing, until he realized that he felt his sin, pure festering wrath
The worst part? He realized that it coming from Mc, who oddly enough was just sitting quietly on the couch, blankly staring at their phone in front of them
Satan went quite
Which caught the attention of the other brothers, who also turned their shouting at Satan, and even though Satan was very tempted to strick back at them, he held his tongue for once
Mc: "Can you all not fight, argue, or yell FOR ONE DAY?!"
It was at this point the brothers knew, they f#cked up (and went silent)
Mc: "Honestly, I know yall are brothers and demons so this kinda stuff is bound to happen but for Diavolo's sake this is getting ridiculous!"
Mc: *points hoof at Belphie* " Belphie. I know you're the avatar of sloth and therefore sleep a lot, but you can't solve all your problems and grief by sleeping the time away constantly, and the youngest brother brat thing doesn't always make you endearing!"
Mc: *points hoof at Beel* "Beel. I know you have survivors guilt but Lilith ended up living with humans like she wanted, Belphie doesn't need you standing up for him all the time, and you needn't continue to try to fill the hole inside you by eating in a restaurant that has no more food when you could just go down the street to another food place!"
Mc: *points hoof at Asmo* "Asmo. I know you ~get it on~ mainly to distract yourself from your troubles, to make yourself forget even just for a bit, sometimes but you can't push those feelings down forever, so actually talk with someone, anyone, about whats bothering you rather then trying ignore it! And stop hitting on your brothers, it's kinda weird!"
Mc: *points hoof at Satan* "Satan. I know you have an inferiority complex when it comes to Lucifer, but for the love of Diavolo, you wouldn't be called Satan, avatar of wrath, if you were like Lucifer in the first place. You have blonde hair and like cats, Lucifer has black grey-ish hair and likes dogs. AND THATS JUST THE START OF THE CONTRASTS! You are your own person, get that through your thick skull!"
Mc: *points hoof at Levi* "Levi. I know that it's easy to compare yourself to others and not at least feel somewhat bad about yourself but how do you not realize that you're the best tech wiz we got, an amazing gamer, and the most dedicated being I've ever seen in my life! So if you think that you're not good at something think again!"
Mc: *points hoof at Mammon* "Mammon. How in the whole Devildom is the Avatar of Greed almost always poor?! Also I know you are a material gorl, but items and things can't fully fill the void that you feel, so stop acting all emotionally constipated and just ask for affection if you want it!"
Mc: *points hoof at Lucifer* "And you Lucifer. I know you're the eldest and the prideful one, but there is such a thing as shouldering too much and being stubborn to a fault! Ask for help and for Diavolo to lessen your workload every once in a while! And stop not telling your brothers important things, rather then being all secretive to try to 'protect them' youre just hurting yourself and them cause of it!"
Silence was all that could be heard in the House of Lamentation, the brothers still as statues with varying amount of widened eyes, staring at the small being that they cherished that had just ripped into them so aggressively
After a minute ofa dead silent pause, Mc turned off their phone, hopped off the couch and started walking to the living room exit
Mc: "Honestly, I didn't expect to become a therapist for demons when coming here, and now I can't even read my enemies to lovers book in even somewhat peace.... I don't get paid enough for this."
They then disappeared from the brothers' sight, left to wrap their heads around what just happened
And the arguement that started it all? Who was going to make dinner that night
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me nightbringer#obey me!#obey me mc#obey me lucifer#obey me belphie#obey me asmodeus#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me beelzebub#obey me brothers#obey me gn!mc#obey me gender neutral mc#obey me sheep mc#obey me x reader#obey me x mc#this turned out longer than i expected#woopsie#Mc has so much pent up emotions and anger#I kin with stressed and tired from schenagins Mc#Petition to get a therapist for mc therapist#It's safe to say the brothers stood unmoving hours afterwords#Sorry if you're not a fan of enemies to lovers#I thought it was funny#obey me gn!reader#obey me x gn!reader#azure asks#answered asks
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Sfw 8 + NSFW 12 + 17 with Denji
My babygirl deserves some love <3
the way i ate this upđł the brainrot is brainrotting. collegeAU with Denji cuz I like to believe he'd be as much of a loser then⥠gaah i love him so much. also y/n is rich richđ for extra silly and damn this turned out way longer than i anticipated.
8â accidentally walking in on them while they're changing
12â catching them stealing your panties
17â they worship your body
áŚŕłŕšŕŁ âđđ: alcohol cunsumption (reader is tipsy), cunnilingus, Denji being a perv, implied virginity loss, subby Denji
For your 19th birthday you decided to host the greatest party of the year and everyone in your grade was invited.
The penthouse your parents allowed you to live in during college was nicely decoratedâ black and white balloons and drizzle, flashy lights and speakers that started blaring loud music as soon as the sun set. Everyone was having a blast, downing glasses of neon colored punch and cheap beer, dancing and chatting in groups. Well, everyone except you. You were painfully bored.
When you threw the party of the year you didn't expect everyone to forget the purpose of the whole fucking eventâ celebrating your birthday.
You've been sitting all by yourself on the couch for the past half hour, sipping on a plastic cup of cocktail. Your gaze mused on the livingroom of your apartment, trying to find someone interesting to talk to. The only people who approached you were some guys from Arts who tried to chat you up, but they rambled on about some uninteresting exhibitions and you soon got bored and shunned them.
As you got up to refill your glass, you noticed someone slipping inside your bedroom. The fuck.. you thought, pushing past drunk people on your way towards your room. You swung the door open and saw a blond guy about your age standing in front of your dresser. When he heard you barge in he immediately slammed the drawer shut, his head snapping in your direction.
It was Denji. Just Denji.
Though you briefly interacted with the Denji, you knew him from highschool. He was the guy who used to let other students use him as a chair during breaks for some spare change. You remembered working on some group projects with him back then but you seldom saw him around campus now. He mostly kept to himself, so you were surprised too see him at your party in the first placeâ not to mention you certainly didn't expect to catch him going through your lingerie drawer. Still, maybe this wasn't such a bad thing...
"Well, well what do we have here?" you chuckled, leaning against the doorframe with your arms crossed.
"Y/N hi" he said nervously, tugging at the collar of his shirt "I was just um... looking for a place to change. Someone spilled some punch on my clothes"
You noticed the stain on his shirt and smiled, closing the door behind you. "And you thought you'd find a clean tshirt somewhere next to my panties?"
A blush crept on his face as he looked down at his shoes. "No, I mean I was just looking..." he fumbled "It's not like I was snooping around on purpose, i'm not that kind of guy" His voice was weak, half hearted as he looked around the room. At anything but you.
Swaying your hips, you closed the distance between you "So you're not some perv who's trying to steal my panties?" you asked and he shook his head. "N-no I'd neverâ"
"The show me your pockets"
Denji's face grew livid when he heard your command and you knew you had him. He was caught red handed and there wasn't much he could do about it. If he admitted maybe you'd at least allow him to stay at the party for a bit longer The boy couldn't bear to look you in the eyes as he reached a hand to the back pocket of his jeans and procured a pair of your lacy panties.
"Here, take them, but just know it's not what you think." It was cute that he still tried to find excuses for his actions and you blamed the alcohol for the heat pooling in your lower abdomen. Taking a seat on the edge of the bed, you gazed up at him with droopy eyes.
All the while, Denji was getting more and more nervous. His palms were sweaty, heart hammering in his chest as he peered at you. God, you were so damn beautifulâ Though he didn't admit it, Denji had a crush on you from the first moment he saw you. You were the pretties girl in school, which meant you were way out of his league. A goddess like you would never spare a moment of her time on someone like him, right? Well, his conviction was starting to crumble now that he saw the way you eyed him down with that taunting glint in your eyes.
"Ya know, Denji, I don't recall you giving me a gift or wishing me happy birthday. It's awfully rude of you." you slurred, tapping the floor with the tip of your heels.
His sorry excuses were half drowned by the blaring music in the other room. Your head was starting to get foggy from the alcohol, limbs growing heavier, as if an invisible weight was pulling you down against mattress. "Jee... quit the whining" you giggled, waving a dismissive hand in his direction "I'm not mad at you. However, I do think you need to make up for it."
"Y/N, I told you I'm in a tight spot with money this month, but I'll buy you something nice once I get my paycheck."
"I'm not talking about that" you deadpanned, a sly smile tugging at the corners of your lips. Your gaze drifted down towards his belt and then back up to his face, taking in his frame. You couldn't deny he wasn't bad looking. Out of all the guys at the party, he seemed the best option for a casual hookupâ not to mention he was already interested in you, so why not give it a try? With a motion of your finger, you beckoned him closer, pointing at the floor "Get on your knees."
Denji swallowed the lump in his throat and gathered the courage to step away from your dresser. With hesitant steps he covered the distance between the two of you and kneeled before you, his hands folded in his lap. His fists clenched and unclenched as he anxiously waited for your instructions.
To be frank, you never expected him to obey so you were quite taken aback by his attitude.
"You still let people order you around, Denji? How cute" you cooed, hooking your right leg over his shoulder and pulling him closer to the edge of the bed.
The blond tried his best not to peek under your skirt, his face turning red from embarrassment. He's never been so close to a girl before, let alone someone as beautiful as you and he was nervous. As if reading his mind you let out a low chuckle, hiking up your skirt.
"Come on, Denji, take off my panties. If you make me feel good I'll let you keep them."
By this point Denji was too far gone. Your silken voice put him under a spell and he eagerly pulled down your lingerie. A small moan slipped past his lips when he saw the string of arousal connecting your pussy to the silky fabric, his features melting into a pleading expression. He looked so needy, gazing at your bare cunt with those puppy eyes, his hands shaking lightly as he fully removed your panties and let them fall in his lap.
"There you go, Denji. Get a good look of it." you encouraged, running your fingers through his tangled hair to ease him into the new situation. You could tell it was his first time seeing a woman naked and didn't want to scare him off. So you took things slowly, waiting for him to get comfortable. Little did you know there was no need for that.
Denji was basically drooling over your pussy. He rested his head against your thigh, leaning into your touch as he spread your puffy folds with his thumb. His breath stuck in his throat when he noticed just how wet you were and it was all because of him. With shaky fingers, he collected the slick from your hole and spread it nicely along your clit, making you flinch.
"There?" he asked in a barely audible voice but you heard him nevertheless. "Y-yea, right there."
He slowly drew circles on your bud, making you writhe on the mattress and you spread your legs wider, shamelessly grinding on his hand. Sloppy movements over your clit had increased in intensity and you could feel the knot in your abdomen tighten with each swipe of his digits.
"Go on, baby, give it a taste" you said in a hushed voice and he immediately obliged. Hooking your other leg over his shoulder, Denji's hands gently massaged your thighs. He kissed his way up to your core, wet lips tracing the inside of your thighs, teeth nipping at your skin but not enough to leave marks.
He licked a stripe of your cunt from your hole to your clit, relishing the taste of your arousal. You were basically melting on his tongue and he was adamant to please you. As the grip on your thighs tightened, Denji collected some spit in his mouth and let the blob slide down your slit. He started eating you out slow, savouring the heat on his tongue but he soon increased the pace. It was clear that he had little idea of what he was doingâ he was sloppy, messy, a mixture of slick and spit coating his chin as he lapped at your juices and you swore you got ten times wetter just by hearing him moan into your cunt.
His tongue flicked your clit so eagerly, lips wrapping around your bud, giving it an experimental suck. Your hips jolted up in pleasure but Denji quickly pulled you back on his face.
"Is it good?" he mumbled, pussy drunk eyes briefly meeting your as you nodded.
"Y-yea. You're so good Denji, gonna make me cum soon."
He mewled at your praise, his ministrations growing in intensity as heat pooled in your core. You were so close, choked moans spilling from your lips as your vision blurred. Denji made you feel so good you were starting to regret not paying more attention to him all those years back. He ate you out like it was his lifeline, hugging your thighs closer to his face to keep you from squirming too much. When you came you came hard, nails grazing his scalp as you pulled him closer to your cunt, grinding down on his face to ride out your high.
"Denji fuckâ" you whined, arching your back off the mattress and he gently massaged the fat of your thighs and hips, his hands seeking your body you.
"I got you, just cum for me ok? Please feel good" he said softly, kissing your pussy and the inner side of your thighs before working his way up to your belly. He didn't dare go past the line of your dress, though all he wanted was to keep touching and kissing, to soak you up in all the love and affection he harbored for you during all these years.
When you looked down at him with those droopy, drunk-dazed eyes his heart sank, a soft smile etching onto his features.
"Are you okay?" he asked in a small voice as you pushed yourself up to sitting and held his face in your hands, leaning towards him. Denji's eyes rolled back into his skull as you kissed him, his lashes fluttering shut. You could taste yourself on his tongue along with the sweet punch he drank earlier that night. The kiss was heated and you pulled him on top of you, tugging at the wristband on his jeans.
"H-hey wait a minute I've never done this before" he tensed up but you shushed him with another needy kiss.
"Shit, I don't care if you're a virgin Denji I just need you so bad right now. Please" you huffed out and he felt his dick getting impossibly harder. He could almost cum in his pants at the sight of your pleading expression.
"Okay..." he whispered, hesitantly unbuckling his belt and you could tell he was nervous again. With sloppy movements he managed to allign himself to your entrance, shuffling around to make sure everything was alright, but just as he was about to push himself inside he perked up, patting your thigh. "Oh, Y/N I almost forgot."
"What?" you whined, grinding your needy pussy on his length. Why can't he just fuck you already?
The blond looked down at you with a lovesick smile, his eyes sparkling with adoration "I think I still haven't wished you happy birthday"
#this turned out way longer than i expected#i believe in denji eating reader out supremacy i'm telling you this man gives good head#đŤđđŞđŽđđŹđđđáŚŕłŕšŕŁ â#chainsaw man#chainsaw man smut#csm x reader#csm denji#chainsaw man denji#denji#denji x reader#denji smut
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TFP Optimus Prime x Reader 18+ MDNI
Thoughts I got from reading another fic please hang with me here. You! with a puppy-like personality! thatâs it. thatâs the plot.
If thereâs an opportunity to follow him youâd take it. Youâre always there perched on his shoulders, whispering something silly into his audials. It reminds him of times where he was once the silly one and not tackled with prime duties
When youâre not in the mood to be silly, you lean against his helm and watch him work. Your hand constantly smoothing over the side of him helm, exploring the metal. It drives him crazy in such a good way!!! Letâs not talk about his embarrassing loud fans coming on after you dip your hand to explore his neck cabling. It startled you enough to not do it again (oh but he wishes you would)
he says random words in cybertronian when heâs talking with his teammates so he doesnât get you excited. Mission. Scouting. Patrol. Theyâre all trigger words that make you jump on your heels begging to go! (life has been boring after youâve been forcibly relocated to Jasper following the knowledge of these titan mechs)
If youâre not allowed to go for any reason you���re on the couch sulking. Ratchet is tonightâs biggest loser as his impractical jokers punishment is hearing you sigh all day long. It actually makes him antsy until he puts you to work by helping him around base when the children arenât around. When they are however, itâs easier to distract yourself from your funk.
When Optimus gets back you want to be mad at him, you really do. You just canât help yourself! Youâre already running to give his pede a hug. You give him time to settle in and talk with the other mechs about whatever the mission was about. When you find alone time together afterwards, youâre asking all the questions!!
He loves it when you do because it gives him the opportunity to recall every detail and ponder on what he couldâve done better. Thereâs also a unique perspective you offer as a human and heâs always ready to hear that
Mass Displacement is a rare occurrence given their low energon reserves. HOWEVERRR! When there is more than necessary I guess he can do it just this once! (itâs never just once)
It gives him peace of mind when youâre in control. He doesnât want to accidentally squeeze too hard and get you hurt, so he settles with you doing the work and him helping. Not that youâre complaining either, youâre practically jumping at the opportunity to have him every which way
You particularly like riding him. It makes it easier for your hands to touch all across his frame, his hands helping you ride as he lifts your hips with ease. The vibrations of his engine rumbling hitting you when you massage his seams.
Your energy seems to be boundless. Thereâs so many rounds and youâre always bouncing on his spike, milking him as you overstimulate each other. Your brain runs on pure bliss as you donât register that youâre still riding. Optimus has to pull you off and youâre still seeking stimulation when you both know you canât go any longer. He calms you down from your seemingly permanent high and you crash immediately when the exhaustion hits you
This is the same reason why you canât cockwarm (spikewarm?) with him. At all. You canât help trying to find stimulation and being a brat when he has you sat in his lap reading over files you donât understand. You have too much energy and your fidget is hopping
#optimus x reader#optimus prime x reader#transformers x reader#human reader#writing shenanigans#had this in the noggin for days you guys donât understand#this turned out longer than I expected
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I had to block so many Alicent stans bulldozing my posts lately but I need to vent. Yes, Alicent is a product of her father, yes her marriage to Viserys was traumatic, yes the way her council and her own son are treating her is awful.
Here's why I don't have a shred of empathy for her: she chose, actively, of her own volition, not manipulated by her father or husband, not pushed to it by whatever trauma, to slutshame Rhaenyra over and over, and chose, actively, to raise her sons to believe they are better than women simply because they're men. That is a choice. Don't tell me she was protecting her children because Rhaenyra would have killed them when she became queen. Rhaenyra said in front of all of ther father's council that she wanted her son and Alicent's daughter to marry. She wanted to bind both families even more. Kinslaying is a curse that Rhaenyra would have no reason to invoke if they hadn't stolen her crown. All those arguments of Rhaenyra hating her brothers stem from nothing. She literally ignored them 99% of the time, they're the ones who were obsessed with her and her kids because of Alicent's poison. Rhaenyra just saw her brothers as kids. If she hated them she wouldn't have let her sons near them. Alicent chose to torment Rhaenyra to the point where her sons only call their sister "the whore of Dragonstone" and that is not something that was imposed on her by a flawed system, that was a choice on her part.
She also chose to abuse Rhaenyra's sons for their birth. Bigotry against bastards still exists to this day. There are countries where bastards weren't allowed a last name until the last couple decades, that's how recent it is, GRRM didn't invent that. And that's just the legal repercussions, the social ones are worse. I don't take that hate lightly. Alicent chose to remind the whole of the Red Keep over and over to keep calling those children bastards. She made them feel unsafe in their own home. She chose to make her sons hate their nephews and torment them for being bastards. That was a choice that wasn't pushed on her, she did that all on her own.
I have been slutshamed and abused by women like Alicent my whole life. And guess what, the patriarchy those women suffered under? We're all suffering under it. Some of us chose not to take it out on other women. And some of us chose to pander to the man and uphold the patriarchy like it's their life's purpose. Is Alicent a complex nuanced character? I would argue yes actually. She was a victim of certain circumstances and guilty of others. She's quite realistic. She's every right wing woman I've ever met. And no I don't have empathy. She made her bed. She can die in it for all I care.
Also, I don't hate her anymore than I hate the rest of the greens. I'm just angrier at her because a man calling his ex a whore is like a dime a dozen there's so many of them. A woman calling another woman a whore? That stings. That hurts a lot more than anything a man could say.
#this turned out a lot longer than i expected but i needed to get all that off my chest#anti alicent hightower#anti-alicent#anti greens#anti green stans#anti alicent stans#pro team black#pro rhaenyra targaryen#anti team green
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wait wait, whatâs the change tumblr did to the reblog chains ? đĽ˛đĽ˛đĽ˛ Iâm so lost
okay so basically, let's say you see a post on your dash
before the update, if you clicked on a url, you could do 3 things:
view that specific reblog on the blog you follow (A)
view the previous reblog on the blog A reblogged it from (B)
view the original post on op's blog (C)
however, staff recently implemented an update where clicking on a url no longer takes you to that specific post. now, clicking on a url just takes you to the blog itself.
this means that you now get 5 things:
view ONLY that specific reblog on the blog you follow (A) -> changed location near header. also, you will now ONLY see that post and nothing else
view ONLY the original post on op's blog (C) -> changed location near header. you will only see that post and nothing else. and ONLY if the op hasn't deleted it, otherwise it just shows an error
view the blog of the person you follow (D)
view the blog of the person D reblogged it from (F) -> option B no longer exists
view the blog of the op (E)
you might be thinking: "cool! i get more options so that's good, right?" well, no.
there are SEVERAL things wrong with this and it goes beyond the prev tags issue
1) first of all, it's counterintuitive that A and C changed locations to the area near the header, especially if your userbase was already used to the previous functions. it just seems like horrible UX design to me but let's put that aside for now.
2) as you can see, option B which allowed you to see the previous reblog of a post no longer exists.
now, if you click on the previous url, you will just be taken to their entire blog. you can no longer view the post itself.
someone asked staff about this, and they replied in this post that the change was INTENTIONAL and if you want to view the previous reblog you would have to "go through the notes view".
to borrow what someone else said:
basically, this update just killed the prev tags culture in one fell swoop.
(sure, you can still use it to reply directly to the person you're reblogging from, but it's now literally useless to use "prev tags" for everyone else involved. sure, you can choose to copy tags or peer review them, but again, if people will have to copy them then the less people are likely to use them, and not every prev lends itself to peer-reviewing imo)
now, listen. i know not everyone likes the prev tags culture, but it just seems like such a poorly-thought decision to kill a culture that like... half of your entire userbase uses (see this poll as a quick reference) and that's UNIQUE to your site and sets you apart from other social media.
but it's also not even just prev tags. let's say you want to remove an annoying addition on a post's reblog chain? you can no longer do that.
however, i feel like this is the most important point:
regardless of how you may feel about the prev tags culture, the pure UI aspect of it should remain
what i mean by this is: even if you don't like prev tags, simply 1) being able to access the reblog chain, and 2) clicking on a post and actually have it take you to their BLOG (and not just a page with that one single post) is literally essential navigation.
this update threatens to drive down user engagement (which is already critically low) by making it harder to navigate. which is actually another point:
3) even if you click on A and C now to view those specific posts, it's NOT the same as it used to be.
before, you could view the reblog directly on the blog. so you could just scroll down and see the other posts leading up to it. now, you will be taken to a page where you will ONLY see that post and nothing else.
but also, you can no longer easily navigate other people's blogs.
you know how sometimes you would see like 50 notifications of someone going through an entire tag on your blog? that's going to happen a lot less, i'm afraid.
let's suppose you want to go to op's blog because they're an artist and you want to see more of their art. so you click on C and see that the tag they use for posts with their art is "#my art"
cool! before, you could just click on that tag and immediately view ALL of their art as long as the posts have that tag.
but now, if you click on that tag, it will take you to the ENTIRE tumblr tag with literally all the posts that everyone in the history of time has tagged with that specific tag.
now, to do the same thing that just took 2 clicks before, you would have to: click on C to view the post -> look for the tag you want to navigate -> click E to view their whole blog -> scroll and look for a post that just so happens to have that tag (the search function is literally useless) and hope to god that there's a recent one or you'll have to scroll for ages or simply give up -> if you happen to find it, click on that tag to navigate their posts.
you see how this is counterproductive, right? you see how this can literally drive down engagement with content creators, right?
if you make people's blogs harder to navigate, you will literally drive down the number of likes and reblogs on their posts, which have already been steadily declining for years now.
4) options D and E to view the blogs and not the posts are literally useless because you could already access other people's blogs before. you just had to click on their url to view their blogs starting from that specific post AND you could choose to just refresh it to view their newest posts.
either way, the change just seems completely unnecessary. and again, it's not just about the prev tags culture but about basic UI.
so what can we do about it?
i normally don't advocate for flooding staff with messages but i do feel like this is one of the worst updates staff has ever done (and that's saying something) and something needs to change.
even if they don't retcon the entire update, that's fine, but staff could at least add the option to view the reblog chain as a different feature (maybe even opt-in) for example. there are better ways to go about this than just axing an entire existing feature.
also, this same issue that makes it harder to navigate blogs needs to change. i feel like content creators will be especially affected by this unless this changes because you can no longer easily navigate their tags, so it will inevitably drive down engagement.
so please, contact staff and let them know we want a change.
you can contact support here!
here's a template for a possible message you could send, but feel free to edit it. (under category you can choose "Feedback")
Hi, I would like to politely request a change to the recent update that affects the reblog chain of posts. Regardless of the "prev tags" culture itself, the UI aspect of being able to view the reblog chain of a post is essential for navigation on this website. Even adding it as a separate, opt-in feature would be a huge help. Additionally, clicking on a post and then on one of the tags now takes you to the entire tumblr tag instead of the tag on that blog, which makes it harder to navigate blogs. Both of these issues have the potential to drive down user engagement by actively making it harder to navigate Tumblr, but especially for content creators. I hope you can do something to address these issues as soon as possible. Thanks in advance and have a nice day.
also, if you can and/or want, reblogs are appreciated to help spread the word!
that's pretty much the gist of the issue from what i've seen, but if anyone else has anything to add or a different way we could contact staff to make ourselves heard, please feel free to let me know!
TLDR: it's not just about prev tags, this update affects basic functionality and content creators as well
Update Sept 07, 2024: this issue was "fixed" a few months back, although with some caveats / downgrades. You can check out this post for how to view the reblog chain, but all the other issues addressed in this post still remain.
#pls reblog if u can to help spread the word!!#@anon this turned out a lot longer than i expected omg#i hope u don't mind me hijacking this ask to make a general informative post about this issue!!#ask#anonymous#tumblr#tumblr update#prev tags#signal boost#supportcontentcreators#evansyhelp#staff#long post for ts#196
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steddie | rating: t | 8,8k | tags: modern setting, no upside down, crush at first sight, flirting, first kiss, chrissy & eddie are best friends, dustin & steve are siblings, steveâs yellow sweater
for @steddie-spooktober day four âcorn mazeâ and day twenty-nine âsweaterâ
Summary:
Eddie heads along a straight stretch of the corn maze that ends with a sharp curve to the left. He takes it at a fast speed, eager to get out of hereâ only to run straight into something solid. âJesus Christ!â Eddie curses, stumbling back a few steps.
Two hands grab his shoulders to steady him and a male voice says, âWoah, careful there!â
âIâm fine. Dude, what the fuck are you doing creeping around fucking corners?â Eddie asks, finally looking up at the guy and nearly swallowing his tongue.
Because staring down at him, with big hazel eyes tinted with concern and a cute divot between his eyebrows, is the hottest guy Eddie has ever seen.
âI wasnât creeping,â the guy scoffs, dropping his hands from Eddieâs shoulders to his own hips. âYouâre the one charging through the maze like a bull, man, someone chasing you or something?â
Eddie lets out a snort. âIâm just trying to get the fuck out of here but this place is a fuckingâ well, a fucking maze.â The guy lets out a giggly snort and Eddie melts a little. âAnyway, sorry for slamming into you.â
He waves Eddie off. âNo worries. I play sports,â he says, grinning, âIâm kinda used to being tackled.â
Eddieâs eyes roam over him. Even under his coat and his sweater, he can tell the guy has a broad chest, nice arms. Nice thighs too, filling up his tight jeans nicely.
He unintentionally licks his lips. âYeah, you feltâ um, solid. It was like slamming into a freaking wall.â
A very sexy wall, Eddie thinks.
or Eddie gets lost in a corn maze and ends up finding something better than the exit
read full fic on ao3
#steddie#steddie fic#stranger things#stranger things fic#i started writing this for day 4 didn't finish it tried to write it for day 23 and then didn't finish it either whoops#so here it is! late and longer than i expected but i really like how it turned out so enjoy xx#steddiespooktober#steve harrington#eddie munson#monse writes
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Gem and the Scotts, Scotts and the Gem
#geminitay#scott smajor#smajor1995#impulsesv#gem and the scotts#secret life#this took longer than expected#but Iâve been having awful art block so that makes sense#I wanted to go for a baby metal type vibe#because theyâre in a cherry blossom biome with their cute cottages#but also chose a very 80-90âs rock band name#also I hate impulses outfit#I tried to mix Lolita accessories and his already canon skin#itâs fine#I just donât love how it turned out#also I thought Scott would definitely be the type to play a violin in a rock band
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and when you go to the sea, i will be waiting for you at the shore.
#shrios#shepard x thane#thane krios#femshep#mass effect#mine.#oc: claire.#i just finished my me run so i had to do this to continue my canon ��đ¤đ¤đ¤!!!!#honestly i love how this turned out ack đđ#like no words. this took me longer than i expected just bc i kept stopping to stare at it LMFAO i love the clouds#i need to draw more of my shep though đ¤đ¤ but for now. a shrios for my soul
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'Being gay/trans is just a phase'
Oh gee it's almost like identity is constantly changing and people, especially youth, are developing and figuring out who they are!
Many people have phases with their identity throughout their life, so why is it suddenly a bad thing when someone has a phase where they thought they were queer and turned out not to be?
Even if being queer is just a passing phase for some, it doesn't make them any less valid. They're just figuring out their identity, and acting like these people are why conservatives believe that being queer is all a phase is not the way to go.
So if you thought you were and identified as queer but later realised you weren't, that's completely okay! You're not to blame for homophobia/transphobia <3
#this turned out longer than i expected#lgbt#trans#lgbtq#queer#lesbian#gay#pride#discoursey ig#my posts
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i am sadly one of those people who are super insicure of themselves after any social interaction, I go over and over again in my head and feel irrationally bad bc my brain tells me I was awkward, and probably came off as weird and so on. But you know what brain? I had the social interaction. I did it. I spoke out loud to people and had a conversation instead of freezing and feeling unable to talk. So fuck it if I came off as weird and awkward, I am weird and awkward and it's okay, because I did something that just a few years ago would have been even more of a struggle, and even earlier than that it would have been close to impossible.
#i have to keep reminding myself this thing over and over#brain we are not focusing on the way people percieve us we are focusing on the progress we have made through the years#today my brain is bullying me quite a bit over this thing bc i am stressed and i was at work all morning so i had to deal with people#but you know what? i did it and i did my job and i was much more comfortable doing things a few years ago scared me like#casually talking to people and dealing with money#and you know what? when i didn't know what to do or i wasn't sure i asked for help and it was all okay#and people coming into the shop are never rude if they see i have to ask for support to my mom or my brother bc i very casually work there#so i know basic stuff but not everything and that is fine#and if sometimes i need to use a calculator to sum up the prices of things it's okay#and if sometimes a regular knows the prices of what they have to pay already and i have to check it once or even twice it's okay#wow this turned out to be a longer rand than expected but i might need to reread this in the future#note to self#cris speaks
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Thank you so much for your Tiefling smut contributions! I am so lovesick for Rolan and wanted to request--Rolan x fem Tav at the grove party? I know it's super early in both of their arcs but I can't help but wonder. đ
Rolan x Fem!Tav (Unnamed)
Good Night For Company
"Would you mind if I kissed you?" Sometimes you need to feel lonely before you notice the person sitting right beside you.
Tags: Fem Unnamed Tav, Kissing, Accidental Cuddling, Feelings Realization | SFW
Word Count: 5,443 [Read on AO3]
Sometimes it was lonely to be the hero, she thought to herself.
Their camp was fuller and merrier than sheâd ever seen it. Every last Tiefling sheâd met at the Grove had joined them for a night of celebration, bringing along every last bottle of wine and spirits they could get their hands on as way of thanks.
Unsurprisingly, all eyes in camp seemed to be searching for someone else to spend the night with. Who could blame them? Mortal peril and hard-won victories tended light a fire in people, herself included.Â
Yet somehow she still found herself short on options. Everyone at camp seemed more interested in clapping her shoulder in thanks than joining her for a night of abandoned pleasure. Even her close companions hadnât taken much interest in what she had on offer.
Astarion was the only one who had made her an invitation. She practically felt grateful to him for it. He would tempt anyone, of courseâjust look at him. But underneath his beauty, there was a dark edge about the elf that made her hesitate in the end. How was it Gale had described him? âA tiger when it purrs.âÂ
Honestly, she wouldnât have said no to Gale, either. He was certainly attractive, and there was a sad weight to his shoulders that seemed to invite comforting. The kind she wouldnât mind giving. Yet despite the lonely shine in his eyes, heâd made it abundantly clear to her in his loquacious way that his mind was elsewhere this evening. She left him alone to his private reflections.
She at least expected their own cheerful Tiefling to be smack in the middle of the eveningâs revelry. Tonight, Karlach was nowhere to be found. Only when she later glimpsed Shadowheartâs tent standing dark and noticeably empty did she put the pieces together.Â
Well, good for them. At least two of their group might have a chance at a lay tonight.
No such luck for her, it seemed. She raised the bottle of Ithbank to her lips and tried not to feel too sorry for herself. The last few days had been long, exhausting, positively brutalâŚher muscles ached from overuse. Really, a good nightâs sleep should be more than enough to satisfy her.Â
And yetâhow nice it would feel to be touched and held with tenderness, even if it wasnât real, even just for one night. Just enjoy a harmless tumble in someoneâs bedroll before everything crashed around them again. The thought of the long road that would greet her in the morning made her groan, and she shook the thought away.Â
It hardly helped her souring mood to see Danis and Bex practically sitting in each othersâ laps in the middle of camp, gently knocking their horns together with affection. She averted her eyes and took a rather resentful swig of wine as she trudged past.
âGo on then, give us a show!â
Teasing laughter came from just ahead. At the edge of camp, she happened upon the three Tiefling siblings from the Grove. Rolan, the oldest, stood flexing his hands as if preparing for an impressive feat. As she approached, she thought for just a moment that he glanced in her direction.
His brother Cal heckled him mercilessly from the rock where he and Lia were perched. âLose your nerve, wiz?â
Rolan sighed, long-suffering. âHave you no respect for showmanship?â Not leaving time for any more smart comments, he flourished his hands upward with a low incantation.
The effect was like tiny stars, or fireflies, or some combination of the two. Sparkling lights spread and popped above their heads, leaving behind a violet mist that gently faded into the night.
She found herself smiling up at the sky. It wasnât a powerful display, but it was lovely nonetheless. And certainly unique. She wondered how one went about inventing a Weave spell; she wouldnât know where to begin.Â
Tucking the bottle against her chest, she offered a little round of applause. Cal looked over at her then and let out a groan of amusement. âNot you, now heâll keep at it all night.âÂ
"Shut it," Rolan shot at him, positively glowering. Lia was clutching her side in laughter at his expense.
Two against one; that was siblings for you. She was in a newly generous mood after his pretty magic, however, and decided to lend Rolan a hand.
"Surprised you're still here," she said, cocking her head toward Cal. "Last I heard, Lakrissa was looking for you."
Cal's neck practically snapped with how quickly he craned it around camp. Lia turned her mirth on him, aiming a punch at his shoulder.
"As if, you idiot," she chuckled. "She's only about ten times out of your league."
"You don't know that," Cal told her, completely thrown off teasing his brother as he rose to look around the party hopefully. "She told me I had a good parry one timeâI could have a chanceâ"
As he wandered off, Lia threw up her hands and rose to follow him. "Guess I'll go save Lakrissa. Or maybe just watch what happens. Nice one," Lia added over her shoulder, grinning appreciatively at her.Â
She and Rolan were left standing alone to the side. There was some awkward shuffling of feet; somewhere past the campfire, Volo launched into his third stanza of Tymora's Melody. A song to make people lucky, she seemed to recall. A suggestive choice for the night.
"Drink?" She broke the silence, offering out the bottle of wine. Relief flooded Rolanâs face.
"Gods, please." He accepted and took a generous pull.
"You certainly have your hands full with those two, donât you." She bit back a grin at the way his brow crinkled in response.
"They areâŚ" Rolan cast around for the word. "Challenging. But I don't have to tell you that," he added, glancing sideways at her. "We were bickering the first moment you met us."
"That's just family, though," she laughed, taking the wine back from him. Their fingers brushed together slightly over the bottle.
âNevertheless. My thanks.â He waved his hand in a general motion, but she could tell he meant her intervention before.Â
âDonât mention it,â she told him.Â
Seeking a reprieve from the merry music and voices around them, her feet idly made their way toward the edge of the fire's light closer to the riverbank. From the corner of her eye she saw Rolan follow. They settled on a log of driftwood that faced the scenes at camp.Â
"So, you're finally making your way to Baldur's Gate," she said. It wasn't a question; he'd already told everyone who would listen about his apprenticeship with Lorroakan of Ramazith.
"Finally.â His eyes glowed with pure enthusiasm. "You have no idea how long Iâve waited for this. The slightest delay has felt like an eternity.â
âAnd Cal and Lia? They must be excited, too.â
âOf courseâ he said, though his lips raised in a little smirk. âTheyâve never been to the Gate, so they donât quite know what to expect. But theyâre just as eager.â
She watched him for a moment as she turned the bottle over in her hands. "You're quite sure of yourself, aren't you."
Rolan looked at her with a challenging expression. âTell me, in our position, what else is there we can be sure of?"
He almost made her regret herself. âI didnât mean that. Itâs just that youâre veryââ
âI expect most wouldnât guess that a hellspawn could earn a position under the greatest archmage on the Sword Coast,â Rolan said before she could finish.Â
His moods were volatile as a storm; turning this way and that without warning. She was never sure what to expect from him. Before she could protest his assumptions about her, he continued onward.
"We three never had much between us, you know." Rolanâs voice was abruptly low and bitter. "Somehow we've got less now than we started with. Not even our birthplace anymore. The one thing Iâm sure of is my magical talent. I'm not going to deny it for the sake of being modestâ" he tossed the words out with contempt. "Not when it's the one thing I always knew I had in spades. With the right instruction, I could be inimitable."
She studied his determined profile in the half-light of the campfire. Perhaps there were more layers to his self-important attitude than she'd thought. After all, without him taking on the challenging role that awaited him in the city, Rolan and his siblings found themselves in much the same position as the other refugees milling about camp tonight. A heavy weight despite his obvious enthusiasm. Who was she to judge him, or any of them?
Rolan finally caught her watching him and cleared his throat. "Forgive me, I think I'veâhad too much wine."
"Oh?" She gave the bottle a swirl; it was still more than half-full. "You're making pretty good sense to me."
"I don't usually speak so freely with strangers," he explained tersely, glancing away.
She pondered the comment over another sip. "Does that make us friends, then?" She asked, not sure if she was being serious or trying to tease him. He did seem like he'd be awfully fun to tease.
"That's a little premature," he said dryly, but he glanced at her with a serious look. "Though I suppose, given recent events, you've earned it."
"A roundabout way to say yes," she laughed. "But I'll take it."
Rolan only made a low, grumpy noise in his throat. But he didn't challenge her.
âIâm really glad you three stayed, you know,â she told him. âI know you were against it. It certainly wasnât the easy choice.â
Rolan plucked a bit of dry grass from between his boots, twisted it between his fingers. âDonât thank me,â he said. âOnce Lia gets an idea in her head to save some poor thing or other, thereâs no arguing with her. And she knows I'd never leave her behind.â
"You say that, but anyone with eyes can see the way those two look to you for guidance. They would've followed you down either path."
"Not like us staying even made a difference," Rolan deflected, tossing the ball of grass onto the dirt in front of them. "We only lost a few more traveling days waiting around while you and your friends took care of everything. For which, I suppose, we owe you thanks," he finished sarcastically.
"I suppose," she said lightly. But she was looking straight at him.
Rolan was clever enough to realize he was being chastised. He let out a sigh, but dipped his horns to her in resignation. "Thank you."
She only smiled at him and offered back the wine in response. He accepted without comment.
Watching him tip back the bottle, she mentally fit another piece to his puzzle. "You don't like feeling powerless, do you?"
Rolan looked sideways at her. "Does anyone? Do you?"
"No," she replied, feeling a little foolish for asking. When he passed it back, she drank deeply from the bottle, grounded by the burn that traveled down her throat.
"That must make your situation difficult." Rolan was watching her almost cautiously, as if the subject should be carefully tread.
"The tadpole, you mean?" She spoke it aloud, not wanting him to feel any suspense about the subject. How the thought could fill her with dread and a kind of dark humor at the same time was beyond her. Maybe the worm in her brain was finally driving her mad after all.
"First I had to talk Nettie out of giving me a lobotomy. Then I thought the renowned First Druid Halsin might be able to heal me, but no luck. I even thought that crazy goblin priestess could have something up her sleeve." She gave a mirthless laugh, starting to feel the weariness closing around her again. "Suppose I just need to keep searching, right? Halsin thinks we might find answers in the Shadow-Cursed Lands. Or maybe the cure is in Baldur's Gate. Who knows," she added, glancing over at him. "Maybe your Lorroakan could know the solution, if he's as powerful as you say."
"He is," Rolan answered automatically. His luminous eyes were sharp with enthusiasm as he watched her. "When you get to the city, come see me at Sorcerous Sundries. If a cure exists, it'll be recorded somewhere in the library of Ramazithâs Tower, I'm sure of it. Iâll even research it, if I have time."
Inwardly she hoped they'd all be cured far earlier than that. But she was touched by his sudden helpfulness, even if it was half to prove the powers of his new station.Â
âThank you, Rolan,â she smiled. âI appreciate it.â
He dipped his horns wordlessly toward her again. It was a gesture she was beginning to recognize, and grow rather fond of. She offered him their wine bottle in thanks.
From there they both let the moment drift. Seated on their log near the riverbank, she turned to watch how the rest of the revelry was progressing. Alfira had joined Volo in some kind of bardic duel; a rapid-fire melody drifted out to where the two of them sat. Lia appeared to be bravely trying her luck with Lae'zel. Judging by Lae'zel's very non-subtle body language, she was actually getting somewhere.Â
And to her disbelief, she even saw Cal and Lakrissa sitting together at the fire, engaged in what looked like a very friendly, very close conversation. Was it seriously everyone's night but hers?
She glanced to Rolan's face at her side. He wasn't paying attention to her; his fingers rolled the neck of their shared drink idly back and forth.
It should've occurred to her sooner, honestly. Despite Rolan's initial bluster, she found it surprisingly easy to speak with him one-on-one like this. He had a depth she hadn't noticed before.Â
And he wasn't bad to look at, either. Golden eyes set against inky black, strong jawline, lips that often curved up in a little smirk that she wasn't sure he deserved but found charming despite herself. She decided to dispense with caution and just try her luck.
"Would you mind if I kissed you?"
âWhat?â Rolan's head jerked around as he stared at her. "Why?"
"I don't know," she admitted. Maybe this was a bad idea; the shock on his face made her question her own boldness. But then she thought of his pretty spellwork. "Because you're the only person who's made me smile tonight."
Rolan examined her expression as though trying to tell whether she was joking. "We barely know each other," he said slowly.
She gestured her head toward the crowded clearing. "I mean, I didnât know any of these people a few weeks ago. And now look at us. Weâre practically family at this point.â She turned back toward him. "Besides, maybe I'd like to get to know you better?"
Rolan cast around for a response to that. "I suppose you're notâŚunattractive," he conceded. Although the nervous movement of his fingers gave him away a little.
"Know how to make a girl feel special, don't you," she laughed. "Look, Rolan, say no if you don't want to. I'm not after anything serious. It's just a good night for some company, and honestly, Iâve enjoyed talking to you."
Rolan was considering it; she could practically see his mind ticking between his options. "You're quite tenacious, aren't you?" He told her, the hint of a smile teasing at the corners of his mouth.
"When I want something," she agreed.
Something in the words seemed to tip his decision. She watched Rolan's eyes flick down to her lips.
Taking that as a yes, she tilted forward to press them against his. His skin was warm and softer than she expected. Rolan didn't move against her, in fact was practically frozen still. She couldn't tell whether he was inexperienced or just out of practice. Regardless, she pulled away to look at him through her lashes, checking his expression.
This close his golden eyes almost seemed to blaze. She watched them move over her face, taking in her features up close. When he realized she wasn't going to initiate again, Rolan leaned in for another kiss.
Definitely not inexperienced, she decided, as his lips slid and moved softly over hers. She breathed in and smelled smoke and wine and something spiced; a pleasant warmth coiled in her stomach. He sighed into the kiss, apparently feeling something similar.
She felt a tentative hand rest on the side of her waist. Without breaking from him, she scooted sideways to get a little closer, inadvertently pressing her leg up against his. Rolan made no objection, only circled his arm further around her back.
It was the nicest feeling. Being held by a firm yet gentle touch, sharing kisses that flowed from sweet to eager to shy and back again. How long had it been? The longer Rolan's mouth moved over hers, the less she cared about remembering.Â
She hooked her arms over his shoulders to keep him close. As she tilted her chin for a better angle at his mouth, she took a chance and ran her tongue along his bottom lip. Rolanâs fingers dug slightly deeper into her side, but his lips parted to allow her in.
She felt a thrill run through her as their tongues melted together. They tasted each other softly for a moment; unconsciously, she combed her fingers up through the hair at his nape.
Rolan broke away gently at the feeling. She grew suddenly shy when their eyes met again, and she cast around for something to fill the silence.
"Why do you hide your ears behind your hair like that?â She wondered aloud. âTheyâre lovely." As she spoke, one of her index fingers went to tuck a lock of his hair back behind the long, pointed arrow of his ear, grazing against it with curiosity. Before she could blink, his hand caught hers to pull it away.
"Don'tâ" Rolan said abruptly, then let out a nervous laugh to break the tension. âTiefling ears areâŚquite sensitive.â
"Oh," she said. His meaning sunk in the rest of the way. âOhâIâm so sorry, I didn't realizeâ" The heat of embarrassment on her cheeks could have melted her.
"Itâs all right,â he told her, laughing genuinely now. âGods, your face is almost as red as mine.â
Rolan was even more handsome with a real, true smile on his face. She wasnât sure sheâd ever seen one there before. Before sheâd found a response, his grip on her wrist was gently pulling her arm over his shoulder, and her body closer to him with it.Â
She decided another kiss would shut up his teasing nicely. She followed his lead and then some, wrapping both arms around his lovely shoulders, melting against his lips again. He said something against her, but the words dissolved into a hum that sent a pleasant shiver down her back.
Finally, Rolan succeeded in pulling away to glance back toward the center of camp. "Sorry," he said breathlessly, and it sounded like he truly was. "I justâdon't want you to face uncomfortable questions in the morning."
No doubt his siblings' teasing was another factor, but she didn't call him out on it. While she appreciated his chivalry, all she could think about was getting his mouth under hers again.
"We could go to my tent?" She suggested.
For all the cockiness he'd spouted from the first moment she met him, she felt Rolan's hands almost seize up around her.
The feeling made her bite back a grin. "I'd just like to kiss you some more," she said, tracing her thumb against his jaw. "We don't have to do anything else. It would just be more private. And more comfortable."
Rolan licked his lips, unsure. âWonât that be even more obvious?â
âI donât think this crowdâs going to notice much at this pointâŚâ She turned with arms still around him to look over the scenes near the campfire, and Rolan's gaze followed. The generous flow of alcohol was taking a clear effect on most of the faces gathered here and there. Around the fireâs edge, Alfira was leading many of her fellows in a rousing ballad that she didnât recognize. Most voices were noticeably off-key.
âCome on,â she invited Rolan, rising with one of his hands in hers. He made no protests as she led him around the edge of camp, trying to stay out of the more obvious sightlines, and towards her empty tent. When she held the flap open for him, he ducked in quickly without a word, and she followed.
Inside, the light from the roaring campfire filtered dimly through the fabric walls. She watched Rolanâs luminous eyes glance around, taking in her personal effects, finally landing on her open bedroll. He swallowed hard.Â
âJust sit,â she told him, guiding him by the arm down beside her. They settled side-by-side on the blankets. Somehow the mood between them was back to the initial uncertainty of before, as if they hadnât already shared a score of kisses.
âYour tent smells like you,â he said out of nowhere.
"Really?" She chuckled, but the observation somehow made her very nervous. âNot sure if I want to ask what my smell is.â
âBalsam.â Rolan didnât elaborate, only dipped his head swiftly to place lips under her jaw. Her laughter dissolved into a sigh of pleasure. Clawed hands snaked up around her side and down over her shoulder, tipping her torso into him. She let her head loll to the side to give him all the access he could want.
Sheâd forgotten all about his sharp incisors. As he kissed down the side of her neck, his warm breath sending a cascade of shivers over her spine, one of his fangs grazed her bare skin by accident. Her sharp intake of breath surprised even herself.Â
Rolan pulled away to look at her, uncertain if heâd done something right or wrong. She used the moment to capture him in a kiss again, sucking and nibbling on one side of his bottom lip, letting him know how right he was getting this.
She sank sideways into her bedroll, pulling him down with her with hands clasped behind his neck, trying to be mindful of his angling horns.
Rolan's arm rested comfortably over her side, nails whispering against her back as he held her. He was so gentle like this; so unlike the way he presented himself to others. The thought that she was seeing a side of Rolan most others didnât get to seeâshe liked that thought very much. She tangled a hand in his hair as their kisses turned soft, and lovely, and almost lazy.
The security of his arms around her in her soft bedroll, the alcohol making its way rapidly to her brain, the exertions of the day straining along her limbsâŚshe felt herself drifting toward a state of relaxation almost like sleep. She roused herself, wanting to kiss him back while she had him here. She wasn't sure when they'd get a chance like this next.
But Rolan gently disentangled their mouths for a moment. "Here," he said, scooting his arm under her neck like a pillow. She leaned against him with a comfortable sigh.Â
"Your arm's gonna fall asleep," she warned him, making no moves to shift the weight of her heavy head.
Rolan chuckled low in his chest. "I think you'll be doing that first."
She wanted to make a snappy response, but all that came out was a petulant groan against his lips.Â
This wasn't going at all the way she intended. She wasn't supposed to doze off, she was supposed to kiss the Tiefling wizard until he saw stars, like the ones he'd conjured for her.
Because he had conjured them for herâshe told herself that with certainty, whether or not it was true. The sweet thought carried her toward sweet dreams, and the memory of them behind her eyelids was the last thing she saw before she drifted.
â
The call of an owl nearby pierced through her sleep. As her mind surfaced in the darkness, the first thing she was aware of was the pleasant weight of an arm across her. She sighed and settled comfortably back into the warm figure pressed up against her hips and shoulders. The mystery arm pulled her in tighter in response.
Things began slowly filtering back to her; the party the night before, and the wine, and Rolan, andâ
Her eyes opened wide then. The interior of her tent was so dark that she could only make out blurry shapes. Outside, she heard nothing but crickets and a few more distant owls hooting; it must be well past midnight. The fire hadn't been tended for hours, judging by the absence of light reaching through the fabric walls. Presumably the rest of camp had all turned in long ago.Â
With the nervousness of a person who'd fallen asleep from drink, she shifted around a bit to confirm that yes, she was very much still fully clothed. Her toes flexed against hard leather; even her dusty boots were still on her feet. That answered that question, at least. She glanced down at the clothed arm over her stomach.
"Rolan?" She whispered through the dark.Â
She felt and heard his lips mumble something against her hair, and then Rolan's face nestled deep into the crook of her neck with a happy sigh. The intimate gesture made her bite her lip. She could feel his steady breaths tickle against her collarbone.Â
However much she might want to let him stay right there, forever, she knew she should wake him.
"Rolan," she whispered a little louder. Twisting a bit to free the arm under her side, she reached to gently pat the spot between his horns. She felt his hair rustle freely under her hand; its orderly tie must have come undone in the night.
Rolan inhaled sharply awake then. He lifted his head from her as if trying to cast around for where he was.
"We both fell asleep," she whispered, stating the obvious. She felt him tense up behind her as he took in his body's positioning: chest pressed against her back, one arm cradling her neck, the other wrapped tight around her waist to keep her pulled in close to him. She wasnât sure, but she thought she even felt his tail twined around one of her legs.
Every part of him retreated from her at once as he lurched into a half-seated position. "I'm sorry," he apologized in a groggy whisper.
"It's fine," she assured him, wondering why he would assume she didn't enjoy the closeness as much as he clearly had in his sleep. "I think everyone else is asleep by now."
There was a long, quiet pause. Then Rolan began, âDid weâŚ?â
âNo,â she interjected with certainty.Â
"Thank Gods. I meanâ" He cast around in the dark for one of her hands, realizing how that came out. "We both drank a lot, that's not how I wantâit shouldn't be like that."
"I know." The sweet goodness of him made her heart swell.
Suddenly, Rolan grabbed his head with both hands. "Fuck," he hissed. "Lia and Cal."
"What about?"
"They'll know I didn't come back to our camp last night," he groaned low.
"Ohâokay," she said, trying to think; her brain was still fuzzy from the night's wine. "Well, maybe they'll just assume you got back late?"
âYou don't understand, they know that Iââ He cut himself off, and finished, âThey already tease me about you.â
âOh." She did her best to ignore the way that made her insides do a happy flip. But she couldnât resist teasing a little herself. âThen maybe theyâll just assume you finally got lucky?â
His head fell against her shoulder with a groan, horns lightly knocking against her. âPlease,â he begged.
âSorry, Rolanââ She was instantly contrite, holding his head close to place kisses across his hair and forehead. "Listen, we've got an hour or two before dawn. Maybe you can sneak back and they won't know how late you were out. Where's your camp?"
"The bluffs just outside the Emerald Grove, with Lakrissa and the bard."
She knew the spot; they could easily reach there in a quarter hour on foot. But first, she scooted away and undid the flap of her tent to peer out for any signs of activity.
Everything outside was very still. She watched carefully for another moment just in case; near Wyll's tent, Scratch snuffled and buried his snout further against the owlbear cub's feathers. Beyond that, there were no signs of stirring in the camp.
She ducked back inside the tent for a moment. "C'monâ"
With quiet, shuffling feet, they crept out into the quiet moonlit night. Scratch's head raised silently in their direction. She stared into his dark eyes with a silent plea, begging him to be a good boy and stay quiet. He lowered his head back down without a sound. She swore to herself that she would find him the biggest, juiciest bone in the morning.Â
She grabbed Rolan's hand behind her and tugged him quietly through camp. They passed tent after tent filled with steady breathing, boots padding against the dirt in near-silence.
Once they were outside the ruined wall at the edge of the campsite, she let out her pent-up breath in relief.Â
Rolan kept his fingers twined firmly with hers as they walked through the moonlight. They talked about anything to fill the air, about things that didn't matter, both trying to stave off the impending end of their short night together.
Far sooner than felt fair, they rounded into a familiar clearing, and she knew his destination was just up the hill to their left.Â
"Well," she began, as they slowed to a stop.
Before she knew it, she was pulled against Rolanâs chest in a tight embrace. She folded herself into him as completely as she could manage, breathing deep and committing his scent to memory.
When they broke apart, he kept her close so he could see her face in the moonlight. "Which route will you take to reach the Shadow lands?"
"Through the Underdark if we can," she answered. "I wasn't sure about it, but we all took a vote after the fight yesterday. What about you three?"
"I don't know," Rolan said honestly. "It depends how Zevlor decides. We're all going to travel together as far as we can."
"Oh," she said. She ought to say something reassuring about how that was a wise tactical choice, but she was overcome with the realization that she might not see Rolan again for many weeks. Possibly not until they both reached Baldur's Gate.
In that moment, she fervently regretted not fucking this wonderful man into tomorrow when she'd had the chanceâwine be damned. From the way Rolan was looking at her, she wondered if he was thinking the same.
Instead, she leaned in to kiss him one last time with everything she had. She wanted to remember the way his shoulders fit perfectly under her arms. Rolanâs grip closed around her middle, and in the next instant she felt her feet dangle weightless as he lifted her off the ground into him.
The kiss had to end eventually. As he lowered her onto her feet, she touched back down to dirt and reality.Â
âYour hair,â she gasped suddenly. It hung loose to his shoulders, his red ear tips poking from between the locks. It was a very handsome look for him.
Rolan raised a hand up in realization himself. âIâll figure somethingââ he began, but she was already tugging at the leather lace that fastened her shirt. She raised it to her mouth to bite off a short length.
Before he could stop her, she stood on tiptoe to gather Rolanâs hair behind his head the way he usually kept it. Her arms circled him as she tied it halfway back with the makeshift string. She could feel his eyes on her face, but she steadily avoided meeting his gaze. She foolishly felt like she might cry if she did.
âThere,â she sniffed as she pulled away.Â
Rolan only gave her a gentle smile. âThank you,â he said, dipping his horns to her one more time.
Telling him goodbye hurt just to think about. âGood night,â she whispered to him instead.
âIt has been,â Rolan agreed. âThe very, very best.â
#this one turned out much longer than i expected#how very much i love him#rolan x tav#bg3 rolan#rolan bg3#underdark-dreams#bg3 fanfiction#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#tav pov for a little change
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What a lovely group of students, i sure hope nothing bad happens to them ever â¤
For now, things are kinda chill tho
#usually relate stuff on friday but it's been so long since i last updated -2+2..#and i kinda wanna get the non-ballroom chapters out of the way finally. can y'all believe we got 5 of those?#that's crazy to me because in my head ch4 is only ch4 AT the ballroom. if you get what I'm saying#that's fine tho. i do enjoy writing chill character interactions quite a bit#even if this chapter turned out way longer than i expected-#hyena scribbles#dra#danganronpa another#dra -2+2#Mikako Kurokawa#Kizuna Tomori#Teruya Otori#Yuki Maeda
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