#This is why I love being Catholic
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...Man's suffering shows what God can do. Affliction, sorrow, pain, disappointment, loss always are opportunities for displaying God's grace. First, it enables the sufferer to show God in action. When trouble and disaster fall upon a man who does not know God, that man may well collapse; but when they fall on a man who walks with God, they bring out the strength and the beauty, and the endurance and the nobility, which are within a man's heart when God is there. It is told that when an old saint was dying in an agony of pain, he sent for his family, saying: "Come and see how a Christian can die." It is when life hits us a terrible blow that we can show the world how a Christian can live, and, if need be, die. Any kind of suffering is an opportunity to demonstrate the glory of God in our own lives.
William Barclay
#i love this so much#This is why I love being Catholic#William Barclay#Holy death#Final perseverance#christian living#reflect on this#Virtue#suffering#trials#Stand strong in the faith#God is with us even now#witness#All glory to God#this means so much to me
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True that
Love Christianity for simultaneously being able to say that the real reward is in heaven but also that there are good things that are temporary it’s a very beautiful thing to find joy in both the lesser and the higher
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If My Body Could Speak, Blythe Baird | The Godfather, Mario Puzo | My Father's House, Sylvia Fraser | To The Daughter Who Secretly Longs For Her Mother’s Affection, Lynne Shako | Storms from Jupiter, Wanda Deglane | DO NOT REPLY, @filmnoirsbian
#connie corleone#carmela corleone#the godfather#web weaving#this is...quite negative towards carmela i guess#so i just want to make it clear that i actually really love her as a character and i actually can understand how she became who she was#she was a woman born in the late 19th century raised not just in a patriarchal society but a CATHOLIC patriarchal society#who therefore grew up learning that she was primarly defined by her relationship to her husband and her capacity to be a 'good wife'#so i totally understand why she would take some type of sick pride in knowing that her husband never 'had' to hit her#but like...that entire part of the book was legit hard to read and Carmela was really not that much better than Vito there#so it's kinda hard for me not side eyed the shit out of her when she blame Connie for being a neglectful mom#like geez Carmela I wonder why your daugther might be struggling I'm sure it has nothing to do with anything you did or refused to do...#i'll say that she did end up being concerned for Connie and trying to help so she definitely deserves some points here#unlike Vito's dumbass who was just like 'it really hurts me to know that my daughter is being hit all the time but i can't do anything :('#'I'll tell her it's all her fault and that she deserves to be hit that will surely help somehow'#Vito really spent the entirety of this book being like 'nothing and I mean NOTHING matters more than blood (conditions very much applies)'#domestic violence mention
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Man, I feel like every clip I see from Pints with Aquinas lately Matt Fradd is demeaning women. Really sad to see it, I used to love his interviews :/
#lilac rambles#pints with aquinas#matt fradd#catholic#if anyone knows of anyone who has adressed this (not a paid substack. im very broke rn and only looking for podcast type things)#please let me know about it#honestly it feels like every other day someone i really admired turns to our polarized culture of hate#i was watching his recent interview with jason evert and jason is saying all these beautiful things about how the women he's encountering#who are dressing immodestly or being promiscuous or engaging in the culture are deeply wounded and matt just keeps jumping in with all these#reminders that yeah thats great and all but dont forget women suck too#and like. we know! we know the ways we suck! the entire red pilled manosphere spends a lot of time pointing it out to us!#but if you dont want women constantly pointing out the ways men have failed us then for the love of goodness please stop taking every moment#where someone is talking about female woundedness to talk about Why All Women Except Your Wife And Friends' Wives Suck#im just feeling very let down
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Noah Schnapp is literally beyond evil. Like, spawn of satan level of evil. He only deserves to suffer for the rest of his existence. How dare he have empathy for innocent civilians in Israel and Palestine. First of all, there’s no such thing as innocent Israeli civilians. Second of all, you can't have empathy for both. Especially if he is a Zionist. All the Jewish people who identify as Zionists are evil. Israel has absolutely no right to exist and Jewish people have no right to exist in Israel. So many Jewish people who are Zionists claim that’s what Zionism means to them but they’re wrong. Zionism is pure evil. You can’t be Zionist and want peace and self determination for Palestinians. I’m not Jewish but I definitely know better than the Jewish Zionists who claim that. They’re all evil lying monsters. They want every Palestinian wiped off the face of the Earth. Hamas would never want such a thing. It’s not like they had a charter that said that about Jewish people. Even if they did, they supposedly recently changed it to Zionists instead so it’s all good now. Hamas is totally accepting of Jewish people now and would welcome them with open arms as long as they aren’t Zionist. Noah, if you’re a Zionist, don’t be anymore. You can change your evil ways. Hamas changed. Yeah, they may have killed civilians and taken hundreds hostage, they may have said October 7th was just the beginning and that it was going to happen over and over again, but they’re no longer antisemitic. They’re just anti Zionist so they’re good people now. You can change and be good too. You’re so young. There’s still hope for you. Stop lying and telling us how you want peace and self determination for Palestinians. We all know that’s not true. It can only be true if you aren’t Zionist.
You liking something like this makes absolutely no sense if you’re Zionist. I bet you don’t even agree with it and just liked it by accident or something. It’s crazy how I even managed to come across this months ago considering nobody talked about it or brought it to light. You liking that sketch of people in the LGBTQ+ community simping over Hamas got so much attention and caused so much outrage though. Funny how the internet works. Anyways, as a bisexual, I was so offended by that video. Hamas are well known LGBTQ+ allies. How could you like that video as someone who’s gay? It’s probably because you’re lying about being gay too. Shame on you.
Last thing I’m gonna say is fuck Israel and fuck Israelis. That country and all the people living there are evil. They’re all colonizers and occupiers. It needs to cease to exist and all the people currently living there need to go back to where they originally came from. All of them came from Europe, right? That’s what I’ve been hearing. They all need to return to Europe. Gosh, why’d they ever leave there in the first place? I know Jewish people say otherwise but they’re wrong. They’re either lying or in denial. They’re not indigenous to Israel. They’re indigenous to Europe. Us non Jewish people really need to educate them more about their own history, religion, ethnicity, etc. We need to teach them what antisemitism actually is. A lot of them don’t seem to understand what it is. We do that to every other minority group that we aren’t apart of, right?
#this post is sarcastic in case you can’t tell#bottled this up for so long and finally exploded lol#gotta learn to just not give a shit#noah schnapp#will byers#byler#I guess I’m also a terrible human being for having empathy for every innocent person affected#Netanyahu hamas and the idf suck#all terrorist groups and militaries suck#they shouldn’t even be a thing#one of the many reasons this world can’t be peaceful#I wish we all could live in peace but that’s never been reality and will never be reality because this world is terrible#if there actually was a god why would they allow all these horrible things to happen?#this is why I’m a former catholic turned atheist#stranger things#I can’t think of anyone more perfect to portray Will#actual gay actor playing gay character#love the representation#so many people who don’t personally know Will demonize him bully him and call him slurs#so many people who don’t personally know Noah demonize him bully him and call him slurs#thank goodness they both have family and friends who care about them and love them#antisemitism
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for the ask game (1)
au where bruce is attracted to his robins and batgirls. he tries not to think about it or act on it, but it's getting more difficult with every new member of his team he acquires. does anyone know? do the robins and batgirls notice his weird behavior? what do they do about it? do they ever find out the truth? who would think it's terrible and who would find it strangely hot/comforting/nice? does bruce ever act on his feelings?
for the ask game!
oh my GOD do i have thoughts for AUs like this, i love this shit so dearly, dirtybadwrong Bruce who's trying to keep a lid on it my beloved.
i think the fun of this AU is if characters would notice Bruce lusting for themselves vs would they notice Bruce lusting for a different Robin/Batgirl. like does Dick pick up on it when it's just him and Bruce? no, because it's just. him and Bruce. he and Bruce are weird and complicated and hold endless bounds of nuance. that's just How Bruce Is, and Dick is the "test run", in a sense. he knows Bruce is new to this whole sidekick/family thing and is giving Bruce grace for being rough around the edges. but when Bruce starts looking at Jason or Tim or Cass that way, that's when Dick starts to notice. it's never enough of a suspicion he feels justified to bring it up, but the thought lingers. he's hyperaware and grows less and less comfortable with leaving them alone with Bruce. it's a weird game of chicken, Dick and Bruce staring each other down when Bruce's touch lingers too long. each waiting for the other to say something first. if Bruce ever broke and actually acted on his feelings, Dick would be eaten alive by the guilt of knowing something was up, but never saying something until it was too late.
obviously, Cass would know. there's no world where Cass *doesn't* know, the nature of who and what she is would immediately clock it. but the issue is, Cass doesn't have a good framework of what family looks like. she doesn't really understand familial vs romantic love bc she has no firsthand experience of what a parent's love should even look like. so she never calls it out. she just watches. i'm a fan of Cass believing this is normal and believing she too can express and act on attraction that's vaguely incestuous. maybe it's with Babs, maybe it's with Dick or Tim or Bruce himself. but she recognizes this as Normal and Accepted within the Batfamily, so it severely fucks up her understanding of familial love and i just. man it's my favorite thing about Cass in Batcest honestly, is how you can play with her lack of experience with love, boundaries, and sexuality.
Tim is the fun one for me. because my favorite flavor of BruTim is when Tim knows, as he agrees to be Robin, that there's a non-zero chance that Bruce is going to be Weird and agrees anyway because he's decided it's an acceptable risk. so Tim knows from the get-go because he's expecting it. if Bruce acts on his attraction, i think it's either with Tim or Cass first, because they're the most likely to confront him about it in a way that isn't entirely negative. Tim has accepted it's a possibility and Cass just seeks being loved and touched so. it leads to the first time someone's ever confronted Bruce about it. and the thing is, Bruce really doesn't like confrontation about his flaws. the first time Tim tries to imply he's okay with it, Bruce would lash out at the idea, tell Tim how inappropriate that is and benches Tim for a week. it'd probably take a united front from Cass and Tim to get Bruce to even *admit* to the attraction. still Bruce wouldn't allow it to happen and he brushes them off until finally, the dam breaks. it's fun if there's a cause like sex pollen, but i think it's *more* fun if it's just. a random fucking Tuesday and finally Bruce is at his limit. he has no real reason, there's nothing particularly different about that day's routine. he just sees Tim or Cass striping armor and sighs and gives in.
i don't think Steph, Jason, or Babs would notice until anything substantial happened. not because they're not wicked smart, but just because none of them were looking for it. Jason put Bruce on a pedestal when he was alive, and when he came back from the dead he wasn't close enough to be noticing Bruce's interpersonal dynamics outside of his narrow scope. Steph has no real framework for what healthy fatherhood looks like, so if Bruce's touches linger, if he stares too long, she just shrugs and assumes it's how it is. and Babs was just never quite close enough to Bruce to notice. if and when she notices, is when actual sexual things start to happen between Cass and Bruce. because Cass would see no reason to hide it. Babs would be pissed, but it'd be tricky to navigate. Cass would be an adult, even if she's only 18/19, so technically, she's old enough to be consenting. if nothing else, Bruce is a careful man. even when he breaks and gives in to his desires, he covers his tracks well. he makes sure he has enthusiastic consent and there's no legal recourse that could be taken. age of consent and all that. there's not much Babs can *do* other than try to tell Cass (and/or Tim) that this isn't normal or okay. not that it gets her anywhere, but god would she try.
by the time Duke comes along (if we venture out of the pre-Flashpoint era) i think it's a sort of. open secret, in the Batfamily. talked about in nothing but hushed whispers and knowing glances. at some point, they've all had sex with Bruce, caving all for different reasons. some more than others. Tim sees it as a duty, Cass sees it as a way of seeking comfort, Steph sees it as getting Bruce's approval for once, etc. it's never forced on them, but eventually, they all come to Bruce sooner or later. and that's the fun irony of it, i think. they try to convince the others not to, but would go to Bruce on their own well. because complicated reasons they can't put into words. sometimes, Bruce is just a messy man who doesn't realize how prized his Attention to for the rest of the Batfamily. that weird duality of not liking him, but also wanting desperately for him to like you. all of them have dealt with it, at some point. so for Duke, it takes a while for him to understand this... whole dynamic. it's Cass who tries to explain it to him, and he's a little horrified, a lot confused. especially when Bruce starts staring at him a little too long as well. i think he'd only want to watch first but well. they all cave eventually.
also fun bonus if we venture into the Dark Knight Returns universe for my bestest girl Carrie Kelley: there's such a like, "i'm fucking around and i'm finding out" vibe to Carrie. like Tim, she's very proactive in just. deciding she's going to be Robin and she's ready for whatever that entails. (IMO canon Carrie is closer to fanon Tim than canon Tim is but *that* deserves its own post-) like she takes one look at the old man that is Batman and goes yup. he's never fucking getting rid of me now. if Bruce started having weird feelings about her, i think she'd have *fun* with it. she's decided she's in it for the long haul and for whatever being Robin means so. she's almost teasing about it, seeing how hard she can push before Bruce snaps. since it's an older, gruffer Bruce, i think he'd express open annoyance at it first, almost a sort of banter about how Carrie behave. but of course he caves and Carrie leans into it, because there's a fun in having all of Bruce's attention to herself. in the main timeline, Bruce is pretty split with so many Robins and Batgirls, but during their era, it's *just* her and him and she's very proud she's got him all to herself.
#bruce fucks/lusts after every batfam member and they all want to protect each other from him#but also they're all going to fuck him anyway bc they're hypocrite and self sacrificial.#necrotic answerings#ask game#brudick#brujay#brutim#brucass#brusteph#brubabs#bruduke#brucarrie#batcest#did i get all the ship names? god i hope so#listen i'm a pre-flashpoint girlie but know i believe there should be more duke in batcest spaces.#let him in on the fun. stop calling him the normal one. let him ALSO be toxic and gay damnit#though trying to figure out their ship name i cackling at the thought of it being bruke or duce. it's so fucking funny to me and idek why#also let carrie into batcest spaces damnit. there's so few bruce/carrie fics you're all uninspired /lh#anyway yeah i'm obsessed with the vibes of#does anyone like bruce? no but his attention. his approval. the things most of the batkids would do for it#i think you could do bruce/helena b with these vibes too#but ngl i got do mad at the batman: brave & the bold show for doing helena dirty by just making her hot for bruce#that i mentally tune that ship out#it's good. it has good potential for daddy issues.#but it just reminds me of how fucking *ass* helena is in that show. they fucked up my bbygirl.#idk why ppl like b:tb&tb so much. i don't think it's good??#is it nostalgia or something? like there's so many other better batman animated shows that can like. write women. idk that's just me#anyway love this concept so dearly <3#bruce who is so fucking bad at love he can't separate familial and romantic love my beloved <3#bruce wayne having *boundaries*? absolutely not in my good catholic batcest home.
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my hot take of the day is that clearly the people who swallow the in universe targ & valyrian exceptionalism are being completely taken in by the exact system that george is trying to critique but also i think the people who over correct into this idea that not a single targaryen is worthy of like, our empathy or sorrow or are rightfully chafing against the structures put in place by valyrians, first men, and andals alike are also being incredibly 2d in their analysis. i feel like this happens most often when people try to make the case that andals are somehow oppressed in westerosi society on a cultural level simply bc valyrian supremacy trumps andal culture. i think this is incredibly silly to say or posit as the truth in universe because there is in fact some oppression of culture in westeros but it’s not the andals lol!!! it’s the first men, the dornish, the rhoynar/greenblood orphans, and the ironborn. there Is some level of,,,, idk bigotry/xenophobia towards valyrians but only valyrians who don’t worship the faith - people like larra rogare, who still follow valyrian gods, do face this bigotry because they’re Too Foreign, the same way someone like thoros, melisandre, taena, etc who are essosi but not from a still heavy valyrian-based society like volantis and lys, and that’s definitely important to the conversation, because it shows the Dominant Culture is in fact the Andal culture when it comes to westeros and that’s like,,, fine, and even more interesting to me to see how andals, who have been the dominant force on westeros for thousands of years, interact with valyrians, who clearly want to keep ideas of valyrian supremacy alive somehow and essentially try to get the other dominant force in westeros to buy in (which they do!). like, are these two at odds sometimes? yes! but i don’t think it’s correct to say that the andals face ~prejudice for being andals or followers of the faith either!
#like certainly people in fandom get insane about the andals bc they’re projecting their hate of catholicism onto them.#but george himself is not writing about how all catholics are inherently evil he’s writing about the STRUCTURE being evil. i think the#series in fact finds something useful in one person’s individual faith & the way they may internalize it. that’s why we get the quiet isle!#getting on my soap box#yes i did see a post about the [redacted] being oppressed by the mean evil valyrians and rolled my eyes.#anyways like this idea that the valyrians are being forcibly assimilated? false! they are doing it very willingly as a matter of fact! aegon#and jaehaerys and viserys all in fact are clearly trying to mesh themselves with andals not bc they are forcing the family to assimilate#but bc they believe the only way to keep valyrian supremacy going is to team up with the culture in westeros that Does frequently impose#itself on its neighbors! i’m not saying the andals are like the ultimate big bad evil here either that’s just as stupid as the knee jerk#‘every targ is evil and anyone who fights them is morally corrupt’ thing that happens in this dumb ass fandom but i AM saying the andals cut#down every weirwood in the south & attempted to do like glorified missionary work in the iron islands instead of actually engaging w what it#is that makes the ironborn so fucking deranged.#anyways the only leaders who are unproblematic are mors and nymeria for managing to mesh two cultures in a way that wasn’t insane aksjdj#dorne has its problems re: deeply entrenched class structures & the use of marriage as punishment but at least people aren’t whipping#ellaria naked through the streets like the andals love to do to essosi women 😭😭#‘oh didn’t dorne oppress the rhoynar’ i said they were better not perfect thank you!!!!! aksjd
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The thing about church is that I would love to go to a Place every Sunday and have the ritual of a group service and hear music and sing with the rest of the attendees and listen to a sermon about a Topic and reflect on how to be a better, kinder, more self-sacrificing person and feel very small in the universe but also feel as though I can do something to help those around me and in the broader community and have volunteer opportunities to do just that. But the thing is I will always feel like an imposter because I can’t make myself believe in God outside of being in a metaphorical foxhole. Anyways who’s down to invent agnostic Episcopalianism
#personal#I think about that clip of the young pope where he’s like ‘you can love god as fervently as you want that’s why I can only love him#a lot#and yes. joining a volunteer group or a neighborhood group or whatever would accomplish some of these goals but#it’s the rituals. it’s the self-reflective aspect. it’s light through a church window and bowing your head#I would love religious services if they didn’t make me feel like a bad person for being unable to have faith#which is probably the most Catholic thing I’ve ever said#i was baptized Episcopalian and raised Methodist + universalist Unitarian for the record#sorry to Catholics for appropriating your culture
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Dorothy being assaulted at 17 and then trapped in a marriage for the next 38 years really makes the queer subtext heartbreaking rather than funny. It also adds a whole lot to how barbed she gets when they discuss her sex life and how vanilla it is or how little sex she had, no wonder it would be a sore subject (and no wonder its consistent that she had very little sex with Stan in her marriage and said she didn't enjoy it when they did).
Yep, that's part of the reason why I think that queer subtext is so insightful!
A queer reading of Dorothy is not necessary to understand the gravity of what happened to her, to be fair. Stan is very clearly depicted as a bad lover in general and an especially inattentive lover to her -- take eg what she says of him in S1E22 Job Hunting:
"It took three seconds. I wasn't sure that we had done anything, actually… until nine months later, when the baby came. Then I figured out that we had."
Which... doesn't seem like a great experience. Add onto it the fact that a) this is a recollection of her first time, b) she was coerced into performing the act either via emotional manipulation or alcohol/substances (as well detailed in this post by @eeblouissant), and c) her situation didn't improve at all during her marriage; if anything it got worse, since Stan was always out cheating on her -- no wonder she has a bad relationship with sex! Actually, I've said before that I think she has a remarkably open and healthy attitude towards sex, all things considered.
Thinking of Dorothy as queer (especially as a repressed lesbian) makes it all even more tragic, though. I think it's very likely, considering that she's a Catholic of Italian origin, that she hadn't even realized she liked women by the time she got involved with Stan -- I myself reached that conclusion in my early 20s! However, by that time Dorothy was already married and a mother; can you imagine how painful the mere idea would have been, for her? Of course she'd never even consider it while still married to Stan, and she'd have a hard time coming to terms with it after her divorce. It adds a thick layer of suppression and self-sacrifice to her whole story that I think is very thematically appropriate for her character (and that personally destroys me lmao. I cannot think about it for too long or I'll cry my heart out).
I think her whole experience with Stan also justifies her enthusiasm for some of her lovers in the show, even in a queer reading. I mean -- after all that, her standards must be on the floor! The bar is so low, she's dancing the lambada with the devil! Even a modicum of attention to her needs would blow her mind, I think -- even if it didn't come from her preferred gender, and especially if she wasn't ready to confront the truth about her sexuality yet. A lifetime of suppression isn't easy to get over -- she'd probably blame her bad experience with sex during her marriage on Stan alone (instead of considering that maybe she'd rather not be with a man at all).
Sorry, anon -- you probably weren't expecting a ramble in response, haha! But yeah, you make a great point; reading Dorothy as queer adds even more depth to her character and greatly enhances the tragedy of her story.
(Just for the record -- I've never thought the queer reading of Dorothy was funny! Maybe I'm reading this wrong, I just wanted to clarify.)
#sometimes it hits me again that this poor woman had stan as her first and only lover for 38 years of her life and i just. good god.#i'd just like to give her a hug. is that too much to ask for?#still in s1e22 she also says that she didn't come during that first time (or after) bc 'it always seemed to happen before I was in the room#and i just... like it's played for laughs but that's such a tragic comment to me...#im not going to talk about all the hung ups she likely has about self-pleasure too but she MUST have some bc once again. italian catholic#honestly her love&sex life until she met the girls was just a nightmare.#i wonder how she felt being friends with jean. seeing her love women openly like that. did she wish she could be like her?#was she jealous and didn't know why? did she think 'oh i wish *i* was a lesbian so i could date girls instead of being stuck with stan'?#agh i just. i keep adding thoughts but the more i think about it the more tragic it becomes to me#this is also why ending the show with her in a relationship with (at least) one of the other girls would have worked so well!!!#her character arc is one of self-recognition and self-love. it's a journey towards happiness and self-expression#and that's already a queer narrative at its core#but imagine her going from 38 years with *stan* to openly understanding her sexuality and finding love when she didn't think it possible?#i mean -- the finale does this too and that's why it works well. it's a good finale!#but imagine how much *better* it would have been with a woman!! with (one of) her girls at that!!#with dorothy finally able to be free about herself!!!#AGH i love her SO MUCH!!!!#(i feel like ending the show with a queer relationship between the girls would have worked very well for blanche and/or rose too#but that's a whole other topic)#anyway thank you for the ask op! you're absolutely right!!#the golden girls#dorothy zbornak#ask
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Jesus pointed to the true worship. God, He said, is spirit. Immediately a man grasps that, a new flood-light breaks over him. If God is spirit, God is not confined to things; and therefore idol worship is not only an irrelevancy, it is an insult to the very nature of God. If God is spirit, God is not confined to places; and therefore to limit the worship of God to Jerusalem or to any other spot is to set a limit to That which, by Its Nature, overpasses all limits. If God is spirit, a man's gifts to God must be gifts of the spirit. Animal sacrifices and all man-made things become inadequate. The only gifts that befit the nature of God are the gifts of the spirit-- love, loyalty, obedience, devotion.
A man's spirit is the highest part of him. That is the part which lasts when the physical part has vanished. That is the part which dreams the dreams and sees the visions which, because of the weakness and faultiness of the body, may never be carried out. It is the spirit of a man which is the source of his highest dreams and thoughts and ideals and desires. The true worship is when man, through his spirit, attains to friendship and intimacy with God. Genuine worship does not consist in coming to a certain place, nor in going through a certain ritual or liturgy, nor even in bringing certain gifts. True worship is when the spirit, the immortal and invisible part of man, speaks to and meets with God, Himself immortal and invisible.
William Barclay
#This is really Beautiful#true religion#Worship#catholicism#true christianity#this is why i love being catholic#Religion#spirituality#God is spirit#John 4#reflect on this
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Web-weaving of something to do with Catholicism/ Christianity
Sun-Bleached Flies - Ethel Cain /// American Teenager - Ethel Cain /// Iris - The Goo Goo Dolls /// Matthew 27:46 /// Isenheim Altarpiece - Matthias Grünewald
#the yapper yaps#I GOT A SHITTY ASS REPLY (DELETED NOW) ON THIS SO I'M JUST EDITING TO SAY#THIS IS NOT TRYING TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT ANY RELIGIONS BEING BETTER OR WORSE THIS IS SOMETHING I MADE IN RESPONSE TO MY OWN EXPERIENCE WITH#IT. PLEASE DO NOT TAKE IT AS SUCH#TO BE HONEST I HAVE NO IDEA HOW THAT PERSON FOUND THIS OR WHY THEY THOUGHT IT WAS WELCOME TO SAY ANYTHING SO THIS IS PROBABLY PREACHING TO#LIKE ONE GUY#anyway#now back to your regularly scheduled programme#Ik tumblr loves religious imagery (don't we all) and I'm having a time about that stuff rn so bonne appetit#web weaver#web weaving#poetry#sun bleached flies#american teenager#ethel cain#iris#the goo goo dolls#tw religious themes#religious themes#religious imagery#Catholicism#catholiscism#catholic#catholic imagery#the yapper edits
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My 3 little cousins were baptized today. "Triggered" is kind of a strong word but being in a catholic church again... I'm a little fragile rn ngl.
#butch speaks#it was hard not to shake as i held J over the basin to have the water poured on his head#when he was cleansed of sin. as if a little kid could ever knowly or intentionally offend a so-called loving god#the words came naturally to me#but they meant nothing#i remember when they used to mean something. when i begged gods forgiveness for my sin (being a lesbian) and tried to pray the gay away#i remember how much i wanted to die bc i could never truly embrace the sacred#i STILL deal with the complex of catholic guilt. its a very real thing. its hard to shake#i cant help but wonder if the catholicism ingrained in my brain is why i have a hard time with casual dating n sex#fun fact: there was a point when i was a teen that i got REALLY catholic#i prayed everyday. i talked to my patrin saint (st agnes) every day. i wantsd to become a nun#the thought of marrying a man mad me more sad than feeling like an alien did. so id marry the church as a nun.#not the way to hide being a dyke when ur fam is catholic btw LMAO#the first priest i knew was father joe. i loved that guy. he was so kind. friendly. briming with love.#he was one of my biggest references for what a good person was like#he talked about gods love a lot. how its for everyone. no one is exluded. ever.#he used to look right at me when he said stuff like that. a few other kids too. all of whom grew up to be queer#then father joe passed away. our church merged with another church. father jeff was the priest there.#he was kind but not as kind. he talked about hell and sin more. he looked at the same kids father joe did.#but the kindness in his eyes wasnt there.#that wasnt for us.#my family wasnt even THAT catholic#i went to church every sunday i did vacation bible school and catechism classes and youth group#i was an altar servant and in the choir#i even used to speak/understand a little latin#imagine how much worse id have been if my mom could have afforded catholic school lmao#grateful to have grown up poor in that regard#hm. actually... reading my own tags. mayne we were pretty catholic actually.#fucking hell.#i need to have lesbian sex in a church before god and everyone. mayeb that would fix me.
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@smallerthanzer0 reminded me of my love for Lie To Me as a teenager which is a good part of the reason why anytime I encounter the concept that lying will inevitably lead to a tangled web that spirals beyond your control and come back to bite you in the ass, I'm just like, lol. skill issue.
#the other part of the reason was growing up in a large catholic family as a deep intrinsic nonbeliever. but bygones etc#anyway this does apply to essek but I forgive him cuz he was mostly just outmatched.#he was playing against a better more experienced liar so. I'll let it go.#honestly overall? very skillful lying. few could've actually gotten off as well as he did in his place.#tbh people put a lot of emphasis on the nein being ~just as morally grey~ as essek which I do not believe but#the real camaraderie there was not in the moral greyness but the fact that the nein are also a pack of fucking liars. i love them.#anyway brb while I yell from the rooftop 'LYING AS AN ACTION IS MORALLY NEUTRAL YOU'RE ALL JUST SHIT AT IT AND BITTER ABOUT IT'#this is why the coast is the best. they are a society that would turn lying into an artform.#case in point: fjord. vandran. jester.#this is also the thesis of the tiefling fic. which is why it's fun. you don't need to become a kinder person if you become a better liar.
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I've decided Ingo and Irida can bang once, under sex pollen circumstances, because it would be hilarious.
My ideal is that it's actually only Ingo who gets sex pollened, so poor Ingo is kind of a hot mess and meanwhile Irida is totally fine and normal and just trying to take care of her Warden. Hisui has different values and views than Unova, and Irida just. She does not care. She doesn’t see what the big deal is. She thinks Ingo is the weird one. And I think Ingo would be appalled by his own behavior later and be embarrassed about it and he's cute and funny when he's suffering through his own self-imposed Catholic Guilt akldjlafsjdlka
Ingo has some weird reaction to a pokemon attack or whatever on his way to the main settlement, so he isolates himself in an empty hut reserved for clan members from outside of the icelands. Irida eventually goes to check on him, because this is extremely unusual behavior. Ingo is typically pretty social, and as clan leader, he always goes to her to announce his arrival first thing.
Irida finds him basically in a rut, Ingo has shoved himself into a corner of the bed up against the wall and bundled up under all the blankets, all she sees at first are two silver cat eyes staring out at her. He feels weird, like he's burning up with a fever, and he can't sit still, he keeps shifting around uncomfortably. Irida asks what's up with him and Ingo takes way too long to answer, he keeps trailing off like he can barely think and just staring at her.
Irida finally declares that she knows what's wrong with him, she's seen this before! And if they leave this alone, it'll get way way worse before it gets better, but luckily Irida knows what to do for it! Ingo sags forward with relief because oh, thank goodness, he feels wretched, like the worst flu and just miserably uncomfortable, it's already been a couple hours and he can't take much more of this.
And then he sits back up and nearly keels right over again because WHY ARE YOU STRIPPING?!?!?
Irida: ??? You've seen me bare before, we've been in the hot springs together more than once?
Ingo: BUT THIS ISN'T THE HOT SPRINGS. ///
(Ingo says this facing the wall with his hand over his eyes because he turned around so fast it made him dizzy skzjskskx)
Ingo is very determinedly staring at a spot on the wall and he nearly jumps out of his skin when Irida just casually crawls up onto the bed and sits behind him. Irida tells him he can suffer through it if he really wants to, of course. She doesn't really get why he would, but she's seen people make that decision before. The clan will watch over him until it passes. Ingo asks how long it will last, because he already plans on doing so.
Irida: Days.
Ingo: ...
Irida: Several days, sometimes.
Ingo: ......
Irida: The longest recorded was maybe almost a fortnight?
Ingo: ............
It's only been hours and Ingo is already feeling desperate, and he's going to be like this for days? Possibly over a week? And Irida mentioned it would get worse? Ugh, just kill him.
But then Irida presses up against his back and even through all his clothes and the blankets, Ingo can feel her body and it's weirdly relieving for his current condition, like a heat pack on a sore muscle. Irida tells him he can do that, OR he can just let her help him. No one's ever died of this or anything, but it can get dangerous. Irida wants to help! Ingo is one of hers now. And she doesn't want to risk the life of one of her people.
Ingo doesn't really say anything, but he uncurls a little bit and stops gripping the blankets around him quite so tight, which she takes as a good sign! He has his knees drawn up to his chest, so she has to straddle his feet and lower legs a bit to make it work, but Irida manages to wedge herself between Ingo and the wall so she can at least get him to look at her and give her a straight answer. Ingo tries to start speaking a couple times, but he can't quite seem to string words together, he trails off just like earlier, staring at her like how Irida has seen people stare at the hot springs after being half frozen in the wastes of the icelands.
Irida nods and tells him physical touch is supposed to help, takes the hand that Ingo hadn't even realized he'd reached out, and sets it on her shoulder. She manages to get him to give her his other one, too, and sets it on her waist, and Ingo sighs. It really does help. It's not even that it feels good, it's just that he feels less bad.
Irida presses in closer, happily and proudly rambling poetic about how it must be a blessing of Almighty Sinnoh, that the cure for something so terrible is simply for two bodies to share the same space together so closely they interlock, isn't it nice?
The next morning, Ingo wakes up all groggy, and just kinda lays there blinking at the ceiling for several minutes until he realizes he hears someone else in the hut with him. So he rolls over and almost immediately has a fucking heart attack because there's Irida, still naked, kneeling in front of the fire and poking at with a stick trying to get it going again.
Ingo finally croaks out a quiet little please help me and Irida pats his arm and tells him of course she will. He's her Warden, he can lean on her when he needs to. 💕
She has bruises! And handprints! And oh god, did he seriously leave those bite marks on her?! NOOOOOO-
He behaved as though a depraved animal! A beast!! He shouldn't even be allowed near people anymore!!
Ingo is facing the corner, moping and red-faced and dealing with his Catholic Guilt, and meanwhile Irida is trying to decide what she wants for breakfast VSKDKXJKSKXKX
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(About three weeks later, just when he's almost able to look her in the eye again, Ingo goes to Irida to report on some happening in the highlands. Irida pats him and tells him good boy. Ingo lights up and all but purrs for a second before his brain catches up like WAIT WHAT, NO.
Irida: Oh. Is that not ok? You liked being called that that one time.
Ingo, steaming red face in his hands: MY LADY, PLEASE.)
((Gaeric is unfortunately within earshot when this happens, and he laughs so hard he wheezes, and then when he and Irida depart, he slaps Ingo on the back so hard he stands straight for a few minutes afterwards ndodjwkskmdkx))
#nobokai#pla ingo#pla irida#pokemon legends ingo#pokemon legends irida#Ingo's Catholic Guilt vs Irida being dense as a brick FIGHT#they're such an amazing combination for stupidity I love them so much#(I know a lot of that is probably just me but like. you know kdlsajdkl)#nearly faceplanted into my steering wheel thinking about this afterwards but like#I love the thought of Hisui also not sharing Unova's weird ickiness around virginity and the concept of it#anyway Irida just casually saying over breakfast that oh so that's what sex is like she guesses she can see why so many people seem into it#and Ingo having a crisis while choking on his food because OH GOD HE TOOK HER FIRST TIME TOO NOOOOOOOO JFKDLSAJFKLDASJDFKLJAD#ingirida#submas#ingo#warden ingo#irida#suggestive
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In all my years, I've never seen a movie use non-christian pre-colonial religious imagery as a force of good against evil.
And the fact that in Wendall & Wild - a movie that takes place in a Catholic school, this type of imagery is portrayed as SO much more beautiful and powerful than the drab dreary Catholic imagery of the film... it was fuckin' rad as hell.
#wendall and wild#original#raul wendell and wild#precious perfect boy#anytime a demon shows up in a movie it's always get a priest get holy water get some crosses!#and never hey guys what makes us think that the Catholic Church as an institution is prepared to fight evil???#like here comes a christian demon whose to say an#*who's to say (for a separate example) that a Buddhist monk wouldn't be BETTER than a priest??#a christian demon thrives on the same guilt and shame that thr church thrives on. god has no power without the devil#for his love is meaningless without the threat of hell#so why not get a fuckin better religion in the mix???#tired of all these movies just deciding that Christianity is right. that is so fucking bleak. if Christianity's right then we're all fucked#Christianity#Catholicism#are there catholics on tumblr? and if so. check out wendall and wild it is really good.#in case it doesn't show i obviously was raised catholic and went to catholic school. i also remember everything being vaguely puke colored#but maybe that's just my feelings coloring my memories lol#loooooootta little statues of a horrifically tortured white corpse around tho. and some big ones!#crucifixes are weird. also i thought jesus was white until like... my teen years
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in light of spoilers should i say i don’t care about most lancelot and guinevere romances actually aksjdj
#‘oh i’m so tortured bc i love fucking but it’s sinful’ i don’t care about sins sorry my dad was part of a glorified religious cult#sin has no pull on me. rip to the catholics but i’m built different as a queer sda who was never baptized aksksjsj#u just gotta have more juice than being extremely catholic about it. this is why i don’t care about the blackfyres either aksjsjsn#getting on my soap box#anyways i don’t think this is ooc tbc i just don’t care about this. literally the most boring route for them imo.#i liked lance & gwen in merlin but that’s bc their dynamic was wildly different than the typical lance & gwen one before he died#i don’t acknowledge the show past s3. i barely acknowledge the first three seasons tho so.
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