#This is the shit about the wicked witch of the east

[devilsrecreation]

Memorable quotes from the crackfics (not in order):

“The Lizard of Oz”

Kenge: She’s just mad because I keep “antagonizing the animals”

Jasiri: I have an idea.

Kenge: What?

Jasiri: Stop antagonizing the animals!

Narrator: Wow, this is just like a Mario game. The Wicked Witch of the West is Bowser, Jasiri’s Peach all of a sudden, and now the rest have to unleash their inner Mario!

(Kiburi walks toward Jasiri, growling. She bitch slaps him and he goes down*

Janja: *presses a button on Reirei’s side*

Button: That was easy

Mwoga: OI! Who rang that bell?

The group: Us

Mwoga: Can’t you see?

Reirei: See what?

Mwoga: The painting!

The rest: What painting?!

Mwoga: ‘S on that rock clear as the beak on my face! (sticks a slab to the wall, which shows a painting of an animal knocking)

Jasiri: Looks like we have to knock (knocks)

Mwoga: Alright, that’s more like it!

Kandamiza: (melting) How did a hyena and her stupid lizard manage to defeat me?! Oh, what a world! What a world! (dies)

Kenge: That’s for calling me ‘little’

Jasiri: *flips her off*

Kenge: *arguing with Janja* HOLD ON! HER MATE WAS A WITCH, AND WHAT WAS HER BROTHER? A PRINCE! THE WICKED WITCH OF THE EAST, BRO!

Jasiri: *laughing*

Kiburi: *jokingly* I’m gonna eat him

Kenge: YOU’RE GONNA LOOK AT ME AND TELL ME THAT I’M WRONG?! AM I WRONG? HE WORE A CROWN AND HE FLEW DOWN IN A BUBBLE, DAWG!

Janja: I’m not fighting with you-

Kenge: GROW UP.

Jasiri: Well, there’s only one thing I can do now

Jasiri: *starts singing “Holdin Out for a Hero”

Janja, witnessing the guards chanting: What are they saying?

Kenge: How should I know? I don’t speak Ozian

Kiburi: Sounds like they’re saying “oreo”

Reirei: ….What’s an oreo?

The guards stomping past the group: KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL

Janja: *laughs* Look! Those idiots don’t even know where we are!

The guards: *turn around before stomping towards the group, chanting* KILL KILL KILL-

Kenge: And I’M the one with the big mouth?!

Kenge about Kandamiza: I think we’re gonna have to kill her, Jasiri

Jasiri: Damn :(

“Janja in Wonderland”

Zira: Listen here, hyena, if I lose my temper, you lose your head! Understand?!

Janja: (nervously) Y-Yeah, whatever you say, your highness

Njano, the minute Zira turns around: HEY ZIRA, YOUR MOM GAY

Mwoga: Oh look, he’s got bugs!

Vultures: Let’s fix that, shall we?

Time for a shower!

One…two…three!

(The vultures dump water all over Janja)

Mzingo: *looks at Janja, then his parliament and smiles* I think he still has bugs

Janja: What?! *gets splashed again*

Janja: *falling into the hole* Kids, a little help here?!

Wema and Tunu: BYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Narrator: Damn, kids are savage

Following that…

Narrator: And so Janja fell and fell and fell and fell. Lmao karma for trapping the pups in a hole, Janja

Janja: Hey, that was a long time ago!

Sumu: You forgot to get the key

Janja: What key? I didn’t see a—*sees a key appear under the table* Oh that is some bullshit

Janja: Can I say a bad word?

Narrator: Huh?

Janja: CAN I SAY A BAD WORD?

Narrator: *not taking him seriously* Yeah, sure, whatever…

Janja at Zira: YOU MOTHERFUCKING BITCH-

Janja, hiding behind a hedge: Stand back, I got a chainsaw! (makes chainsaw noises,but the cards’ eyes peer through the leaves) Rum....rum.....? Well, I’m dead...

[mediacinemtographyartetc]

Love wicked, but-

I do wonder why they cut the lines from Boq from the Broadway part-

Like at the train scene when they're wishing Elphaba luck and they're all talking, and Glinda says "Something, something, right Biq?" "It's BOQ!"

and he leaves in a huff? And then Nessarose also rolls away in a huff, and when Elphie see's how Glinda is losing her shit over changing her name and (this still makes me laugh) takes Glinda with her to see the wizard...instead of her sister- wow. Anyway the whole "it's BOQ!" part in the play is a parralel to Glinda giving Dilamond problems with the pronouciation of HER name. She puts so much importance on it and even CHANGES her name showing she's thinking about it but can't quite give people the same common courtesy.

Not only that but getting his name wrong when at this stage they're all close hanging out- they're not strangers she should get his name right!

Like imagine being invisible, Mr cellophane over here.

And yet you can't force peoples feelings and thats the side plot to Wicked that I thought was interesting. Glinda doesn't owe Boq anything. However Boq doesn't owe Nessarose anything.

You can't FORCE love.

Its also a PARRALEL!

That how Fieryo gets engaged to make Glinda happy, but she doesn't own his heart. Same as how Boq is forced (BY LAW so he doesn't even have a CHOICE) is forced to be with Nessarose and this miscommunication whereas Nessarose is maniplating and taking away Munchkin rights is trying to cage Boq alongside her and keep him close.

But he just thinks she needs disability support. It does create the (Eh its albliest depending) on her being able to walk. The reason I personally don't believe this is abliest is that helping Nessarose so she can walk again DOES NOT FIX ANYTHING.

Because the Wheelchair wasn't the problem.

In movies when they 'cure' a disability' the characters life is fixed, they get the happily ever after but in the case of Nessarose fixing her disability did NOTHING.

Boq still didn't love her, at this point any feelings he had jas turned into resentment he see's her as a cruel person whose just a dictator.

Wheel chair or no, Nessa sucks.

However Boq LIKE Glinda is very callous of their feelings unlike Glinda who gets Fieryo, Boq only used Nessa as a rebound when he saw the two kissing and instead was leading Nessarose on when he never really liked her that way. He could've walked away at any time but 'didn't but when Glinda was about to be engaged THEN he decided to act. He was a coward and used Nessa until he finally decided to do something which was cruel and wicked in itself.

So the whole, Boq is callous and wicked himself moments and something as simple as a line such as.

"IT's BOQ!" it dominoed reactions. This highlighted that Boq wants to be seen by Glinda, it shows to Nessarose that Boq was bothered more by Glinda and that she herself is aware that Boq loves Glinda.

It's why when he says "I lost my heart to Glinda, Nessa you know that."

However in the movie that line was CUT.

Instead he's cheering Glinda on for her name change, then shakes Nessarose fathers hand.

The movie made changes, (for the better and fleshed out stories) And I do wonder if in the second part with this line change, if that means the Wicked Witch of the East is going to play differently because of it.

[isabellaapotter]

NO WONDER PEOPLE LOVE WICKED HOLY SHIT.

i have never seen it and i watched the movie last night, and spent the entire morning watching tiktok’s about the lore behind it, who’s who and all that. the CONNECTIONS to wizard of oz omg im losing my mind. all night i was like “ok but who’s the wicked witch of the east???” ITS HER FUCKING SISTER i’m an idiot.

and LEARNING THAT THE WICKED CHARACTERS ARENT JUST RANDOM THEYRE OZ CHARACTERS when someone told me the prince was the fucking scarecrow i lost my damn marbles. AND BAQ OMG HES THE TIN MAN. like i actually can’t even take it.

and DONT even get me started on glinda and elphabas friendship i FEEL SO BAD FOR HER like she showed up to munchkin land and everyone’s burning this damn which when she wasn’t even evil and she was glindas friend😔😔😔

i’m ANGRY that part two is coming out in a year bc i actually just need to know what happens NOW

[diamondzoey]

Chester: Ah, yes. Here we have a beautiful couple...

Azren: I really care about your feelings!

Jemma : I really care about YOUR feelings!

Chester, turning his head: ...and then there's the disaster couple...

Calix: YOU NEED TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME INSTEAD OF BEING AT THE HOSPITAL!

Korey: I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SPEND SO MUCH TIME AT THE HOSPITAL IF YOU STOPPED INSISTING ON FIGHTING EVERYONE WHO COMES WITHIN A FIVE FOOT RADIUS OF YOU!

—————————-—————————-———————

*Amber recording whilst Jemma and Calix are arguing*

Jemma: HOLD UP, HOLD UP, HOLD UP, HOLD UP!! HER SISTER WAS A WITCH, RIGHT? AND WHAT WAS HER SISTER? A PRINCESS! THE WICKED WITCH OF THE EAST, BRO!

Amber: *wheezes like a tea kettle*

Calix, pulling out a knife: I'm gonna stab them.

Jemma: YOU'RE GONNA LOOK AT ME AND YOU'RE GONNA TELL ME THAT I'M WRONG? AM I WRONG?

Calix: It's my favorite movi-

Jemma: SHE WORE A CROWN AND SHE CAME DOWN IN A BUBBLE, CALIX!

Calix: I'm not fighting with you, I'm not fighting with y-

Jemma: GROW UP, BRO. GROW UP!

—————————-—————————-———————

Adriana : I’m going to get so much done today.

Raine: I’ll hold you to that.

*8 hours later*

Raine: So how much did you get done?

Adriana : One thing.

Raine: Well, that’s one more than usual.

—————————-—————————-———————

Vincent, throwing a pokeball at Easton : Easton , I choose you!

Easton , not looking up from his book and catching it: You need an Ultra ball to catch this Legendary Pokémon.

—————————-—————————-———————

Adriana , at Duarte’s funeral: I need a moment with them.

Everyone: Of course. *They leave*

Adriana , leaning over Duarte′s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead.

Duarte: Yeah, no shit.

—————————-—————————-———————

Sammy : Can I go to the pool?

Calamity: Sure, we’ll go as soon as I’m free.

Sammy : No, can I go by myself?

Calamity: You don’t want to go with me?

Sammy : You just go around challenging random people to cannonball contests.

Calamity: It’s the only way to establish dominance.

—————————-—————————-———————

Calix: I bet you’re wondering why I gathered you here today. It’s because we need to have a discussion about how some people in this room aren’t getting along with other people in this room.

Vincent : Why did you say that so vaguely? Nash and I are literally the only people you called in here.

—————————-—————————-———————

Duarte: ARE YOU-

Korey: Fucking.

Duarte: KIDDING ME?! YOU-

Korey: Fucking.

Duarte: IDIOT!

Calix: …What was that?

Korey: Bodie banned Duarte from swearing, so I’m helping them out.

—————————-—————————-———————

Vincent : Hey, Duarte ! Did you know your my BFFLWYLION?

Duarte : What the hell is that supposed to mean?

Vincent : Best Friend For Life Whether You Like It Or Not.

Duarte :

Duarte : That’s one way to say it, I guess…

—————————-—————————-———————

Azren: We’re getting married, bitches!

Jemma: And we're about to make it everybody else's problem.

—————————-—————

Bugs in this one

Korey- @rozeliyawashereyall

Vincent- @littlesiren79

Azren/calamity- @strayharmony943

Duarte- @puffin-smoke

Calix- @pinkcocopuff-aqualoid

Chester- @not-5-rats

Easton- @itsargyle

Sammy- @ccstiles

Amber- @astralbulldragon13

Adriana- @idontevenknow7878

[merelliahallewell]

The Other Inquisitor

  - [The Other Inquisitor]  -  -  -  -  [Part 2]  -  -  -  - [Part 3]  -  -  -  - [Part 4]  - 

The crisp winter air stung Cedric’s face as he stood on the hill overlooking the town of Carver’s Harbor, wind whipping at his cloak. His body gave an involuntary shudder at the chill, and he hissed out a grim curse. He hated it here. Drustvar’s eastern coast was miserable at the best of times, but as winter set in it was downright intolerable. The glacial winds came from the northwest and carried a deathly chill into the town, freezing him to his very soul. When the winds came from the south and the east, they brought thugs from the Ashvane company- or even boats full of pirates. No matter their affiliation, they were a brutal, lawless bunch with trigger-happy fingers and cruel intuitions. He had been happy to kill them, even if the fighting had been bloody. The Captain had only been posted here two months, but the man could not wait to leave this piece of shit town behind forever. 

Worst of all were the people of the town themselves, for no matter which way the wind blew they all prayed to their Tidemother for protection. It was a foul, vile religion, practicing idolatry of some false ocean goddess. Every bit of him despised these practices - but Cedric was also not a stupid man. Kul Tiras had hidden him and his men well enough that Cedric was willing to tolerate their vile religion. The people of Carver's harbor were fearful, scarred from their time in the sway of the Heartsbane Coven's magic. The Light’s truth would be brought to them in time, and it would soothe their troubled souls.

Another gust of wind chilled him to the bone, and the man was stirred from his reflection. The hour was growing late, and the sun had nearly reached the western mountains. Cedric cast his gaze south, to the camp where his soldiers - both Kul Tiran and otherwise - were assembling an encampment. It was small, but these hundred men were the foundation of his new army - the Light’s army, one which would purge the sin from this wicked land. 

Cedric ran a gloved hand through his salt-and-pepper hair as he marched towards the encampment. Snow crunched beneath his boots, his mind filled with the thoughts of what was to come next. They’d march into the troubled Autumnvale, and put its fearful population at ease. A few executions, some torture, and soon it would be free from the harassment of the witches that had spread across this land like a plague. The ruling house of this land - the Waycrests - had been losing the war against them for months. Horrific constructs, dark undead, and evil spellcasters attacked villages and towns freely. It was only a matter of time before the regional guard collapsed- they had no clue how to fight this war, that much was clear. 

A decade spent fighting in Lordaeron had given Cedric the experience needed to face the Hearstbane Coven with ease. The Light would grant him victory here. The Waycrests just did not understand the brutality needed to win a war of this type. 

Cedric finally reached the edge of the encampment, coming to a stop before the two men who guarded its entrance. They each were wrapped in the heavy furs and drab armor of the Waycrest Guard, offering him a sharp salute. He returned it, motioning for them to be at ease. 

“Captain,” one of them said. “There’s a messenger here to see you from Corlain. Scout Elara. She waits in your tent, sir. Said something about... an inquisitor joining us in the Autumnvale? Said it was urgent that you know.”

Cedric’s breath caught in his throat, and he hurried into the depths of the camp. 

-------------------------------

“You are certain it is her? You saw Merellia Hallewell?” Cedric could barely keep the excitement out of his words. He rubbed a medallion in his hands as they spoke, a nervous tic that he'd never quite managed to leave in Lordaeron.

“Beyond any doubt, Capta-- Inquisitor Blackthorn,” Elara returned, showing him proper deference in the privacy of the tent. “I still remember her from Lordaeron. Her hair is different. But the face? It is the same. And there is a certain... weariness in the eyes of anybody who saw the Third War. It is the same as you and I, Inquisitor. I have no doubt it is her. I would swear it before the Light itself. She lives, and she is here." Elara was younger than Cedric, but her eyes were filled with zeal as she confirmed the news. A long pause came, but she offered one more time. "I hope to avenge her betrayal of us."

Cedric looked down at the medallion in his hands, a leather-bound thumb tracing the shape of the Crimson Flame. "I trust your instincts, Elara," he said, though there was something wistful in his voice. "But no vengeance- not first, at least. I want to talk to her."

"Talk, sir? She's a traitor! Desertion is worthy of nothing but death."

A gruff nod was given in answer. "I am the only reason she ever lived as long as she did in Lordaeron. I made her into a weapon of the Light. And when she comes here, I will offer her the chance to be something great again. Either she will serve our cause - the Light's cause - again... or I will show my wayward apprentice the wages of her sins."

[seaside-writings]

Happy Halloween, all you wonderfully, wicked people!

I have always loved found-footage horror movies; something about feeling like you’re with the characters is honestly one of the creepiest things about them.

So here's a prompt list created from one my favorite horror movies "The Blair Witch Project".

I hope this prompt list brings you inspiration wherever it is needed, and like always if you do use these prompts please tag me so I can see what you’ve made!

I hope you all stay blessed and safe throughout your day.

Lots of Love & Wishes: Celia 🧡🎃🖤🕸💜🔮

“I’m scared to close my eyes, I’m scared to open them, we’re gonna die out here,”

-

“I could help you, but I’d rather stand here and record,”

-

“I heard two noises coming from two separate areas of space over there. One of them could have been an owl, but the other one sounded like a cackling,”

-

“ I insisted we weren’t lost. I insisted we keep going. I insisted that we walk south,”

-

“What bugs me out is that we’re so damn deep in the woods, and people are gonna try and come out here and mess with us, then they gotta have something wrong with them, and I’m not gonna play with that,” “ But how do we know it was people?” “Well, even if it wasn’t, I’m not gonna play with that either!”

-

“Give me the compass. You’ve betrayed us all beyond. Way fucking beyond,” “Bullshit. You betrayed us when you couldn’t get us out of the woods last night,” “Yeah, thanks,”

-

“I hate crossing streams on logs. If I never cross another stream on a log for the rest of my life, I will die a happy girl!”

-

“You’re lost, you’re angry in the woods, and no one is here to help you. There’s a witch, and she keeps leaving shit outside your door. There’s no one here to help you! She left little trinkets, you took one of them, she ran after us. There’s no one here to help you! We walked for 15 hours today, we ended up in the same place! There’s no one here to help you, that’s your motivation! That’s your motivation!”

-

“I found some cigarettes. I found them all the way in the bottom of my pack. We’re still alive ‘cause we’re smoking,”

-

“I want to avoid being cheesy, here. I want to avoid any cheese,”

-

“We’ve exhausted all of our natural resources!”

-

“I don’t believe in witches and airy-fairy stuff like that,”

-

“It’s not the same on film, is it? I mean, you know it’s real, but it’s like looking through the lens gives you some sort of protection from what’s on the other side,”

-

“WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!?! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!?!”

-

“What are some of your favorite things to do?” “Well, on Sundays, I used to like to go hiking, but now…”

-

“I see why you like this video camera so much,” “You do?” “It’s not quite reality. It’s like a totally filtered reality. It’s like you can pretend everything’s not quite the way it is,”

-

“Ok I’m not allowed to smoke, but he’s allowed to fart as much as he wants?” “I didn’t give him any fart allowance,”

-

“How’s east?” “East? “Yeah, we’ve been going south all this time. How’s east? “Wicked Witch of the West, Wicked Witch of the East. Which one was bad? “Wicked Witch of the West was the bad one,” “Then we should go east,”

-

“ I am so sorry! Because it was my fault. I was the one who brought them here,”

-

“Mmmm. Marshmallows. Soft,”

-

“We have enough battery power to run a small third-world country,”

-

“You gonna write us a happy ending?”

-

“Flames are licking you like the devil,”

-

“Woke up this morning, just like two seconds ago, and there are piles of rocks outside of our tent. There are three, actually,” “Are you seriously fucking positive those weren’t there when we set up camp last night?” “I am seriously fucking positive these were not here. How would we’ve, like, just made a campsite in between three piles of rocks, just by coincidence?”

-

“Screw that, you think you guys are heroes for killing innocent people?”

-

“Are you eating a dead leaf?” “Yes,”

-

“Let’s not call him “the Captain,” you illiterate TV people. It’s “the Skipper,”

-

“They’re people fucking with our heads,” “But no one knows we’re out here,” “Yeah, but have you ever seen 'Deliverance’?”

-

“What’s with that slime on your backpack?” “That’s not slime, it’s just water. No wait, it is slime, what the fuck?”

-

“Yeah, it was like a serious cackling,” “See, my problem is that I sleep like a fucking rock,” “If I heard a cackling, I would have shit in my pants!”

-

“Whatever it is, it knows that he is gone,” “If that was him, he would’ve said where he was,” “Whoever it was sounded like him,”

[hungry-skeleton]

Do you think Jax and Raymond have arguments about stupid fandom shit and if so, about what?

ABSOLUTELY they will have disagreements over all the classic movie debates (could Jack have fit on the door, who shot first, is Bateman's confession true, etc) each and every rayjax argument looks exactly like this

[hydrate-or-diedrate]

Day 19 of reading homestuck wow

Oh yay! Roxy got to build her fort! I mean yeah she's still in jail and all that, but fort!

Roxy you boy crazy bitch

John you are exclaiming about the magic ring WAY too loudly

STFU CALIBORN YOUR CURTSINS ARE UGLY

Act 6 act 6 act 2 this is getting egregious

Hi John!! Welcome to scribble hell!

"Respectfully plagiarized"

LOSHIT

FLY, SHIT BISCUIT! FLY!!!

Smut blade? Really??

Me too, John. Me too

I love John so much he's such a little guy

YEAH JOHN TELL HIM

I need to chill before this turns into me just posting frames from the story agsjhdhjs

Okay but this one is really good

Caliborn's ugly ass curtains don't even close 😭

FUCK OFF GAMZEE

FUCK OFF GAMZEE X2 WHY DOES THIS MOTHERFUCKER HAVE THE RING

Aranea?! I swear to fuck you better not turn out to be evil

GODDAMMIT ARANEA THIS MIGHT EVEN BE WORSE THAN BEING EVIL

Aranea this is a really dumb plan

NO NOT THE HUMMINGBIRDS

HEY ARANEA THIS KID IS STILL 16 QUIT GRABBING HIM LIKE THAT

ARANEA THIS IS NOT CONSENSUAL HEALING FUCKING STOP AAAA

Hell yeah Roxy shazam yourself outta there

Aw fuck Jake is going nuclear

Oh my god

GAD ZOOKS

BOY HOWDY

HOLY TOLEDO

LAND SAKES ALIVE

HELLO NURSE

BY GUM

AY CHIHUAHUA

Oh my gosh Dave has a puppet butt watch

BOBS YOUR UNCLE

JUMPIN JEHOSAPHAT

SHIVER ME TIMBERS

WIN

ONE

FOR

THE GIPPER

Aranea what are you doing

ARANEA STOP

JADE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID WICKED WITCH OF THE EAST UNDER THE HOUSE IMAGERY

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Aranea you are so fucking awful

Everything was gonna be fine but nooooo

I am Brain Ghost Dirk.

You kissed my boyfriend.

Prepare to die.

SHUCKY DARN

TEREZI WOOOO

OH FUCK JACK IS HERE

Poor Jade and Calliope waaaaaaa

Jade is making a trollsona 🥺

[dbunicorn]

Celebrity Culture Is Harmful to Society - 1001 Words | Essay Example

I love a good concert, sports event but I fucking hate celebrity culture. You have a team of people to present an image, chef, personal trainer, etc....offer your uneducated opinion about everything, speak when you should STFU, hawk shit from overpriced clothing to crypto currency and endorse gambling. You get paid obscene amounts of money while stadiums are subsidized, you avoid taxes and vomit bullshit and call it 'business' or capitalism. Absolute bullshit. 🖕pay your carbon taxes. Retroactively.

God I hate shitty content and art.

I know such a bitch. 💋😘🙏

Every red fucking cent. 🙏💋

I.hope this isn't too aggressive. I've got more bitch in me.

It's hilarious when celebrities criticize others. 80 IQ, access and little talent. You gossip and bullshit for a living.

- wicked witch of the East.

[polzkadotz]

Hi I hope you’re doing better <3. I found this ‘ask me about a wip title’ ask game on your blog but couldn’t tell when it was from, but if you’re still doing it I’m curious about the Elphaba! Andrew au?

It's a christmas' eve miracle, I opened up my tumblr tab AND! I got an ask!!!! A WHOLE QUESTION!!!

I am feeling much better. Kindly thanks for the wishes, I'm sure they were the reason.

The ask game you talk about was HELLISH to find, but I finally did it!!! The post itself is from the 7th of April, 2021 which,,,,,,, sounds SO wrong, because the idea for it was actually from two thousand fucking nineteen (it was rejected for a zine that I didn't even stick around until the end lol), but alright-o tumblr dates! If you say so!

Unfortunately, I never got to write anything for it, and the tiny summary I was able to find is...........................

Vaguely a Wicked AU. Andrew, also popularly known as the Wicked Witch of the West was the scapegoat that helped Kevin The Good (Kevin the Kool) defeat the Wizard of Oz and rise to power. However, the public are still generally opposed to the idea of talking animals living amongst them. With the help of the Wicked Wizard of the East (Aaron), they use the summer castle from Andrew’s boyfriend, Neil (who’s currently and permanently a scarecrow, but nobody really mentions it) to temporarily house the animals until they find somewhere safe to live. Not all of them leave, particularly a plethora of foxes: they see the conditions that the castle is run and decide that Enough is Enough. Basically, an AU where a bunch of anthropomorphized people adopt Neil and Andrew as part of the family and they won’t take no for an answer.

No wonder this shit didn't get picked lmao But I'm not gonna lie, the whole time I was searching for the post, I kept thinking about Elphaba!Andrew and Glinda!Neil, hm..................

[notladylikes]

"i know you're not a big fan of going out but..."

she starts, kicking her feet as she lays down on her bed. madelaine feels like she's been cooped up with this sinus infection for far too long and the girl is desperate for some kind of fresh air. 

"let me buy you dinner please." 

grabbing a strand of hair, the brunette begins to twirl it around her finger.

"i feel like i'm going frickin' stir-crazy, dude. seriously. just....meet me at six. i'll text you the address." 

not giving him a chance to deny her once more, she promptly hangs up the phone and presses it against her chest, a feeling of a 'job well done' starting to simmer throughout her. her brother wasn't often the 'go out to eat' type - save for the diner and bakery in order to get quick meals, but he deserves not to have to cook after dealing with the whole 'getting beaten up' fiasco.

his bruises are fading and that should be a sign that he needs interaction with more than just mrs. o'leary's cat on the second floor.

she glances through reviews on yelp before sending the address for 'ruffinos : italian eatery' to her brother, and hopping up in order to head for a shower so that she can start to get ready. it takes her a little over an hour and is nearing five in the afternoon by the time she emerges from the warm cavernous space of her bathroom, so she promptly begins to do hair and makeup, a rare occasion when she chooses to doll herself up for the night.

madelaine is just as much of a homebody as her brother, but she still has the random urge to get up and leave the house every once in a while. she thinks that brother's genes must have skipped gathering that one.

when she arrives, she notices him already sitting at a table and she inadvertently squeals as she wanders over, wrapping him up in a big hug and pressing a kiss against his cheek. when she sits down, they make small talk - that is until a familiar face is pressed up against the glass window.

miranda.

jake's back is to her, but she's facing madelaine, and the brunette feels a surge of adrenaline coursing through her veins at the opportunity. she knows that inevitably, miranda is going to come inside, and she's going to be able to give her a piece of her mind.

taking a bite of the pasta that was brought out, she nearly gags upon hearing the crooning of miranda's voice calling out to jake. of course she'd want to be seated somewhere near him.

"ah, if it isn't the wicked witch of the east." madelaine says, her tone taking on a hint of ice layered with poison.

"how'd you sucker someone into coming out to eat with you, are you payin' em?"

she asks, a tilt of the head.

at this point miranda has forgone all attempts to talk to madelaine, but that doesn't stop maddie from chiming in every once in a while, especially when she starts referencing jake.

and she knows her brother won't say anything, he's more of the 'ignore it until it goes away' type since his recent accident, but madelaine's never one to shy away from a confrontation - a trait of her fathers.

"listen, you bonafide twatwaffle, i don't know how you managed to get out of your cage, but you should understand what a 'protection order' means. or are ya that fuckin' daft?"

madelaine turns herself slightly, now speaking to the man in question who followed along with miranda for the evening.

"sir, i don't know you, but i sure as shit feel the need to tell you to high tale it the fuck on out of 'ere. ya'see, that woman's a fucking menace. she sent my brother to prison for something he'd never do in a million years, all 'cause she got a wild hair up her ass and decided that she was too good to be divorced and god forbid her catholic heart be burdened by such."

there is no time for breaths taken in between her words, she continues speaking in a ramble.

"i'd say you best go on and get goin' before she plasters your face all over the evenin' news, crying wolf about something you probably wouldn't do."

kindly and calmly, madelaine stands and finds her way over towards the hostess' station. she explains the situation at hand, in a calm and courteous manner, and when she returns to the table, no sooner than she sits down, there is a policeman ( thank god he'd been waiting in the wings to get a seat while off duty ) who has currently taken charge of the situation. miranda is escorted from the table, and the meal is on the house for tonight.

on their walk home, madelaine places her arm through her brother's and nudges him before resting her head on his shoulder.

"told you i always got your back." 

[lady2grace]

Thank you!

Just to elaborate on the Cinder Amber thing since it indirectly brings a lot of my AU plot together.

The Mom( I haven’t settled on a name, but I’m calling her Ashley for this) Had pulled a Wicked witch of the east, and had taken over a town for 10 years, had 2 kids Cinder and Amber fall with a man named Rhodes(I wanted to show him in somewhere lol) and Cinder was 10 and Amber was 4 when their mother was killed.

Two days prior Glynda’s team Of Soon to be possessed Zoroaster Ozpin, Leonardo Braveheart and James Ironwood have been assigned their second year Mission and was sent to parole for Grimm activity in one small corner of Vale and stumbled upon the small village, and was seeking shelter for the the weekend.

Everything went to shit on the second night when James,Leo, Glenda, and Ashley and were patrolling in the woods, Ozpin ended up passing out and stayed back with the kids. Everything‘s all normal, and then a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot, and a SEW called Theodore standing over her in utter confusion, saying that she tried to attack him, and he doesn’t know where he is. He was apprehended, and when they went back to the town instead of everyone  freaking out about the dead town where everyone was celebrating and healing them as their heroes. The Team finds out about the whole enslaving a village for tenure thing, and when they go and try and find her kids, they see that Amber had gotten the maiden powers. They end up taking all three of them back to mainland Vale and while Theodore was listed into beacon while Cinder and Amber were sent to a fancy girl school  and kept a close eye on .

Cinders part in this was her jealousy of her sister receiving her mother’s powers instead of her. She was the smarter one, the one who was training to be the new matriarch, she the One who loves her mother more than anything. So why was her sister the last one her mother thought of? The 4 year old. Amber did end up, receiving a lot of special treatment of her status and cinders jealousy  just grew and grew, until Cinder was 20 and attempted to murder Amber to get the powers from her. Amber went into hiding cinder ended up finding Salem( or, rather Salem found her and promised her powers ) and she’s been chasing Amber ever since, and the story goes the same as cannon. 

My personal rules when writing a RWBY fanfic:

1) Penny Doesn’t Die

2) AroAce Ruby

3) Qrow is Ruby’s Dad

4) Transfem Whitley

What personal rules do you have for your fanfics?

[kny-choatic-headcanons]

Akaza:Assume that if he was old enough to understand the shit we are talking about [Points at rui] He'd probably be fucking sobbing

Gyutaro:She's Not her sister

Akaza Charging up his blood demon art:YOU LITTLE-

Rui watching: huh??

[tired-biscuit]

No thoughts.Just thinking about introvert y/n coming from her stressful job to home just to see her himbo flatmates-Naruto and Kiba- being high on orange juice and sharing their 'pain'.Or them bursting into her room at 3a.m. because they are fighting if hen came first or egg and wanted to know her opinion.Or them fighting over who is y/n's favourite(and y/n telling them they both suck equally:))

oh my fucking god, having naruto and kiba as roommates while you're an introvert would be so goddamn chaotic!! 😭

Like, you'd be cuddled up in your bed at two in the morning, just chilling in your room and watching a movie, and then boom! - Naruto's barging in with full force without any sort of warning whatsoever, flicking the lightswitch on as he goes.

Kiba, grumbling something under his breath and scowling like he usually does, of course follows right after the blonde idiot.

They'd be arguing about something stupid; like who the best character from Sonic is, or some goofy shit like that. Exactly like those two dudes in the fucking tiktok video, shouting the: "She's the wicked witch of the east, bro!", Naruto and Kiba would be going:

"No fucking way that Knuckles is better than Sonic!"

"And why the fuck not?"

'"Cause Sonic is the main character, you absolute moron!"

"So?!"

"What do you mean; so?!"

And you'd just be stuck in it, while they're standing in the middle of your room; Naruto pointing a finger at Kiba as he's getting all up into his face. And then Kiba's losing his cool in a second; going full on Tsume on Naruto's ass.

All of that while you're over there, clutching your fluffy blanket close to your chest, and they're shouting at you to pick a side whilst they're bickering, even though you'd still have zero clue about what the argument is even about.

You'd also have to clean after them all the time - especially the kitchen after Naruto would be done with it, 'cause that man is a slob. And you'd have zero privacy, too. They'd literally barge into the bathroom while you'd be showering or whatever, and act like it was your fault for occupying the room in the first place.

I just know they'd sneak into your room while you'd be gone, and go through your make up or closet; prodding and touching everything like curious toddlers.

They'd lie if you'd question them about it, of course. Sneak glances at each other while trying to tame their shit-eating grins, too.

And dinner would always be so wild; especially if you'd all feel too lazy and would eat it in front of the TV, instead of at the kitchen table.

The fight for the remote would be constant and ruthless; especially when you'd have to pick a movie, because Kiba likes action ones that involve fast cars and crime, and Naruto prefers superhero movies.

They'd shrink your clothes by accident because they don't know how to wash them properly. Kiba would always make the food too spicy, and Naruto would burn it to a crisp every single time.

You'd have to take care of them whenever they'd get sick. They'd be oddly persistent with chilling inside your room during it, even though it makes you irked because you prefer to be alone in your space.

They'd both be flirty as hell, and equally as annoying.

Naruto would always leave the door of your room open, running down the hall whilst you'd grumble about it. Kiba would keep turning your light on and off; just a broad hand visible on the lightswitch, before he'd be making a run for it, too.

They'd be making shrieking sexual noises right outside your door whenever a childhood friend of yours from your hometown would call. Kiba's roaring moans of: "Fuck, y/n! Yeah, just like that, baby. Yes, yes, yes!" would make you facepalm, while Naruto would be banging his fist against the door, screaming with laughter.

On the other hand, they would act all buff and abrasive if you'd even dare bring a guy over by any chance, and act all sweet and sugary around you as soon as he'd leave; probably running for the hills from how mean their stares were. After all, they're super protective over you, despite teasing you constantly. Like two guard dogs watching over each side of you, they certainly aren't ones to mess with.

You'd have a whole collection of their t-shirts to sleep in. Constant flicks on the tip of your nose would be a regular thing with them, rough hands ruffling your hair, hugs from behind, you bouncing on the tips of your toes, because they're holding an object you want above their head just high enough that you can't reach it - all of that.

They'd also ask for constant backrubs, and as for your own - they'd always have your back, as long as you'd continue to help them with their schoolwork.

But all in all, living with Kiba and Naruto would be super fun and chaotic, but in the best way possible. It's like you're living with literal sunshine; sunshine that's embodied two different men, who are just so, so gorgeous and sweet.

Sigh, I wanna write a story on this prompt now... Curse you, anon!

All jokes aside though, thank you for sending this. The himbo energy is immaculate. 🥰

[steampoweredstarsketch]

I JUST FINISHED READING THE TIN WOODMAN OF OZ AND NOW I NEED THERAPY

So basically in The Tin Woodman Of Oz, the main plot is pretty much about resolving unanswered questions about the tin woodman’s origin.

BUT YOU GUYS… You don’t understand… SHIT GOES FURTHER OFF THE RAILS THAN YOUR AVERAGE TELENOVELLA!!!!

If you hadn’t read the Wizard Of Oz book, Dorothy and the Scarecrow find the Tin Woodman rusted in the forest in munchkinland. This is true. But in the books HE USED TO BE A NORMAL MAN. Named Nick Chopper.

This my friends…. has implications.

So turns out, Nick Chopper, was just a normal guy, who falls in love with a munchkin woman named Nimmie Amee, who is a slave to the wicked witch of the East. So they in love and Eastie over here is PISSED so she enchants the woodman’s axe to CHOP OFF ONE OF HIS LIMBS EVERY TIME HE TRIES TO CHOP A TREE!!! And she did this so he would stop loving her.

So he goes to chop a tree one day, and chops his leg off, (BTW nobody can die in oz, everyone is immortal and unaging for all time) so he goes to the tin smith and has him make him a tin leg. He’s like dope, this is cool I still love her, and shes super in to the automaille, so its cool. Next day, DOES IT AGAIN. New leg, contunued love, wash rinse repeat until the whole damn man is tin now.

The thing is, Nimmie Amee is even more into him now as a metal man than when he was a meat man! Thing is, he don’t got no flesh heart to love her with, so he just goes off and chops trees. Then the East witch is like, “AHA!!! I’VE DONE IT!! NOW SHE WILL BE MY SERVANT FOR ALL TIME-!!” And then is promply cut off by about a ton and a half of midwestern colonial farmhouse and thats the end of that.

After that, Tin Woodman is chopping trees, gets rusted, gets busted, then teams up with Dorothy.

This all happens in book one.

The Tin Woodman of Oz is book 12 in the series.

Some things have changed, the wizard hails them as heroes, and the tin woodman is, and I am not kidding, THE GOD DAMN EMPEROR OF ALL OF THE WINKIE COUNTRY OF OZ!! THE TIN GOD DAMN EMPEROR!! OUR BOY HAS A GLOW UP. Like literally

There’s so much time dedicated to how fucking shiny this automatonic dandy is.

So this kid, Woot the Wanderer waltzes in to the tin palace and starts asking some expositional questions, and is like,

“Whoa whoa whoa, hold up. So you’re telling me, you got turned into a tin man,”

“Yes,”

“After telling this woman you would be getting married,”

“Yes,”

“But then you just spent an entire year rusted in place and she never found out that happened to you?? After you said you were going to be married as soon as possible??”

“…. Y-yes…?

“…… Yeah you should really-‘“

“You think I should check in with her-?“

“Yes, you really should.”

So the plot of this one is really about The Tin Woodman, The Scarecrow, and Woot the Wanderer going out to find Nimmie Amee to finally give some closure and put a damn ring on it already.

So they go to the house she used to live in, its abandoned. On their way there it turns out THE TIN WOODSMAN NOW HAS A DOPPLEGANGER, GI JOE EDITION

Meet, The Tin Soldier!!!

He’s a soldier named Captain Fighter, that also fell in love with Nimmie Amee, (You know, after a year of nonstop weeping over the grief of her fiancee just completely disappearing.) He also got his sword cursed by the witch, and ALSO CHOPPED OFF ALL HIS LIMBS AND WAS FITTED WITH TIN REPLACEMENTS AND LOST THE ABILITY TO LOVE AND DISSAPPEARED FROM HER LIFE BECAUSE HE GOT RUSTED IN THE SAME SPOT IN THE FOREST!!!

YOU KNOW….. AS YOU DO…..

So they go to ask Ku-Klip, the Tin Smith that workshoped him to ask where she’s gone to. AND FOLKS…. WHAT THEY FIND AT THE TIN SMITH’S HOUSE WILL HAUNT ME… THIS IS SOME STRAIGHT UP PRESTIEGE MATERIALS LEVEL BULLSHIT!!!

What’s this?? oh nothing, just NICK CHOPPER’S ORIGINAL HEAD…..!! JUST TALKING! COMPLETELY SENTIENT AND AWARE OF HIS SURROUNDINGS ALL THIS TIME!!!!!!

Just then who comes to explain himself but Ku-Klip the Tin Smith himself! and he’s just like

“Huh?? Oh yeah the head, you know when you came to me to get up in some galvinazation?? Yeah I saved the limbs you brought. Really wish you brought more though.”

“Why??”

“Cause I was like hey! You know what would be a GREAT idea?? FASHIONING AN ASSISTANT OUT OF THE LEFTOVER HODGEPODGE OF BODYPARTS FROM WHEN I TURNED YOU GUYS INTO TIN!! I NAMED HIM CHOP FIT. Too bad you didn’t bring in a right arm, I had to make one out of tin for him. Ha ha! Also he didn’t wanna be an assistant so I just let him go off and do his own thing, never too be seen again.”

“…..”

“He has the capacity to love.”

“…..”

And the whole group is like:

But anyways, he just tells them that Nimmie Amee went off to live with some friends on Mount Munch, and hasn’t been seen since.

So they go to mount much, shit gets trippy on the way, and then they get to her house and it’s surrounded by AN INVISABLE MAGICAL FORCE FIELD 6FT THICK AND A MILE HIGH!!!!

AND THIS BLUE EXPOSITION RABBIT IS LIKE,

“Oh this house?? This house here?? Yeah it belongs to Nimmie Amee.”

Tin Woodman/Soldier: “Has she been miserable?? Has she been weeping for me?? How did this forcefield get here??”

Blue exposition Rabbit: “Oh the force field?? Yeah, apparently when the witch she used to work for got merked by a metric fuck ton of cyclone shrapnel, and she spent a long time weeping and grieving for both of her MIA Fiancees, she eventually went, ‘Fuck this noise’, and took what was left from the witch’s magic books and spells around her old house, self taught herself sorcery, got herself this picturesque cottage property with a gorgeous view of all munchkinland, has a garden, sings all the time, and now is just generally doing great and living her best life,”

Tin Woodman/Soldier: “…..Oh…”

So they get through the forcefield, and the Tin Twins confront Nimmie Amee and ask her which one of them she wants to marry now, and then they see

THE OTHER MAN!!!

Yeah, apparently she and Chop Fit ended up meeting and getting married.

You know….

To the being that is the general assemblage of her two former fiancee’s leftover body parts…..

Who now has individuality and sentience and is kind of a crab ass.

BUT ITS WHATEVER I GUESS CAUSE SHE SAYS SHES HAPPY

and to be fair, she really is living her best life, she is mistress over her domain and boss bitch self taught sorceress and also really loves her garden!!! and honestly that kicks ass!!

She gives up being the Empress of the Winkie Country because she made a life for herself, and is living her best life!!!

Mind you this book was published in 1918!!

This isn’t even all the crazy shit that happens in this book, this is just focusing on the Tin woodmans arc for clarity’s sake!

As a side note, all of these books are feminist as hell and really make a point to show how capable women and girls are, and how they are equitable in ability to boys and men, in pretty much all situations. If you need proof, there are, no kidding, THREE seperate times in this series with independent all-female armies in them, where they are legitimate badass and intimidating.

One in the second book where General Jinjur literally deposes and over throws the scarecrow and, for a time, becomes reigning dictator over all of Oz.

One in the third book where it points out that Glinda, the good witch of the south, just has an army of female spartan badasses ready to fight and die for her at her beck and call.

And one in the 11th book where an evil shoemaker kidnaps ozma and conjures the illusion of a badass female army.

THESE BOOKS ARE INCREDIBLE AND IT IS A TRAVESTY THAT THEY AREN’T MORE WELL KNOWN!!!!!!

[greatrunner]

I spend most of my time looking at images of Emerald City and muttering “fuck Dorothy” because she killed the Witch of the East (Florence Kasumba). I don’t think I’ve ever hated a character more tbh.