#They're so desensitised to it at this point

[starlightshadowsworld]

Kenji: in an infirmary bed I've got it! Never have I ever, lost a limb.

Atsushi: also in an infirmary bed, puts a finger down Kenji! That's not fair!

Kenji: Sorry Atsushi but it's part of the game. You're turn.

Atsushi: Never have I ever, been stabbed through the gut.

Kenji: pouts puts a finger down That was mean.

Atsushi: grins I thought it was part of the game?

Kenji: Heh, true. Wait you haven't been stabbed?

Atsushi: No I have, just not through the gut. I've been stabbed through the shoulder, the chest.

Kenji: Ah I see, I got stabbed through the chest too. Okay, never have I ever had a grade 3 concussion.

Atsushi: puts a finger down You haven't?!

Kenji: I had a grade 2 but not 3.

Atsushi: Damn. Never have I ever had my heart stopped.

Kenji: Oh yeah you weren't there for that puts finger down.

Rest of the agency listening in:... What the fuck...

[spadesofgrass]

also I probably mentioned this before but I hate how they try to "gothic-ify" Drakovia & the family to the point of satire like please stfu you can make people look and appear menacing without relying on stereotypes!!

[balconyswirls]

.

[sociallyakwardgirly]

And Americans wonder why they're never be let near ESC

[collecting-dustbunnies]

The longer I play Obey Me, the more I feel like Obey Me is a story about how the MC, in their quest to seek acceptance by the people they care about, ends up destroying themselves in the process and losing the very thing that made them so special and loved in the first place.

In the beginning of OG, they started off as just a normal human who got whisked away to a weird ass world where literally nobody respects them. Despite this, they recognised from the beginning that these demons and angels were not so different from humans. MC's ability to see the demons as actual people and not just beings controlled by their sins was what allowed them to form close bonds with them. They had good intentions to reunite the demon brothers who had undergone centuries of misunderstanding, resentment, and pent up grief. Even though they were excessively nosy, MC's unique position as a complete outsider allowed them to see just how much love the demon brothers had for each other, and how they can become closer if everybody would just better communicate with each other. Serving as the bridge to better improve the brothers' relationships was what convinced the demon brothers to also see MC as a member of their family.

But as the MC became more involved in the Devildom's problems, they started to adopt the same toxic traits that had created wedges between the brothers in the first place. From relying heavily on their pacts to subdue the brothers, to allowing a curse to control Barbatos (even though they had the ability to break it), to going along with the brothers' manipulative scheme to trick Satan into reconciling with Lucifer when Satan ran away to the human world -- it's almost like MC has unconsciously picked up on some of their loved ones' behaviour. Gone are the days where MC brings in a new perspective to problems. Now, they just embrace the chaos and their more darker traits, for that is what is expected of them to survive in the Devildom. And since everyone within their circle puts them on a pedestal, this further affirms to the MC that this is how they should be.

Dealing with the affairs of the Devildom had also caused the MC to grow more apathetic. In the beginning, they had been actively taking steps to form pacts with the brothers and were generally very invested in freeing Belphie from the attic. They remained true to themselves and insisted that they form a pact with Satan based on mutual trust and understanding, and not just as a means to smite Lucifer. Despite being in a helpless situation, MC never refused to give up their agency. But the longer MC gets involved with these shenanigans, the more they grew... numb to everything.

Solomon bringing me back to the Devildom unannounced? Oh, sure. Diavolo and Solomon hiding the reasons for my sudden return? Not my problem.

Simeon facing a problem to the point of having a quarter of the cast acting as his bodyguards? Eh, I'll just ignore it until I can't anymore.

Watching and waiting. That's what they have resorted to doing.

And that mindset of kicking problems down the line until it lands on MC's doorstep and they have no choice but to act -- that's exactly how they have been acting when they were stuck in NB, hasn't it? MC didn't bother forming pacts with the past version of the brothers until they were given an ultimatum, and even then, they simply relied on the convenient timing of each brother struggling with an inner crisis to swoop in, resolve the situation and tick them off their checklist.

MC in NB seems like an unfortunate culmination of everything they faced so far. They're too apathetic to care about getting sent to an unfamiliar place once again, too desensitised to life in the Devildom to reclaim their agency, and too desperate to earn the love of their former family to even think about anything else. They became so co-dependent to the demon brothers that they seem to think they cannot live without them or their affection, even if the ones they are living with in the past are different people from the ones they grew to love in the present.

The phrase "You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain" fits way too perfectly for the Obey Me MC. After all, MC keeps getting rewarded every time they try to get themselves killed (or even when they actually got killed). Maybe that's the only way they know how to resolve problems.

So if they can't die as the hero, they'll just learn to live as the villain.

[radfemverity]

All day on Twitter, pro Palestine westerners of both sexes have been attempting to justify the scenes in the viral video of the deceased, bloodied, half naked woman, being paraded through the streets in a pick up truck by men with machine guns chanting Allah Akbar.

It's come in 3 forms:

1. saying "where were you when the IDF did [X crime] to [Y woman]?" to people they've literally never met and do not know the politics of. They're just assuming that anyone distressed at the footage is a Jewish/Israeli supremacist who doesn't care for innocent slaughtered Palestinian people.

These whataboutery addicts are disingenuous as all fuck, and completely desensitised to acts of violence, so much so that they project their own inability to extend compassion for murder victims on "the other side", onto those whose tweets they're replying to. Victims are just gotchas to them.

But they're cupcakes compared to the next 2 categories.

2. saying that these men's murders of women, abduction of elderly ladies (separate viral incident) and other crimes against civilians is a justified reaction against apartheid and/or settler colonialism, and that Israeli people have had it coming.

I cannot believe I have to say this, but regardless of your opinion on the conflict, whether you’re a Zionist or believe Israel is an apartheid state, if you believe random women, young and old, and their children, being abducted, bombed, raped, murdered and paraded through the streets by men, is a justified response to oppression, then you are dead inside. That’s not brave rebellion. It’s plain old male savagery.

There is, sadly, an academic case which could be made that such brutalities assist the war effort of a nation to gain independence – this being a reference to the fact that the most savage empires, the ones willing to commit the most gruelling acts, tend to be the ones to come out on top during wars. History shows us - think of Rome, Japan, etc.

But this type of speculation almost always crosses the line into justifying such crimes, because it was never about speculation for speculation’s sake. It was about wanting the other side - including women and children - slaughtered. Pro-Palestine Twitter have demonstrated this perfectly today.

Please let me make this excruciatingly clear, this political behaviour is exhibited by practically every male-dominated movement and ideology there is, which is… everything other than radical feminism. Zionists do this too. As do conservatives, liberals, marxists, fascists, progressives, pacifists, nationalists of all stripes – supremacist and anti-colonial, theocrats, Islamists, etc. It’s just that the issue of today is the Israel Palestine conflict, so this is the obvious example to reference.

And the 3rd form of response, much like the 2nd, is to justify these crimes against civilians as an act of rebellion, but go one step further and laugh about it. Saying things like "play stupid games, win stupid prizes 🤣🤣", "Imfao at Israelis suddenly pretending to be victims", making wojak memes and spamming them to the people expressing distress over seeing that video of the dead woman, etc. See this example from a trans-identified man:

Notice how at no point have I said my opinion on the Israel Palestine conflict? Because I have one. And it's probably not what either side would expect. And that’s exactly the problem. My disgust at Palestinian men parading a dead Israeli woman through the streets and spitting on her is automatically interpreted to be me supporting the Israeli state.

But your political view on the conflict should have a 0% impact on this fundamental principle: as a feminist, you do not EVER, FUCKING EVER, think that a woman on "the other side" of a mens war deserves to die.

To accuse someone of not caring about dead Palestinian women, as pro-Palestine Twitter have been doing all day, to random stranger who simply said "this is horrific" re: the dead woman in the truck, is:

a) to project your own heartlessness toward women on "the other side" onto them.

b) to further normalise the glorification of violent men, under this false veneer of their crimes being a necessary and justified revolt against whatever type of oppression they have in their society. As if stripping a woman bare and parading her through the streets has ever been a practically useful or ethical war tactic.

And c) to imply that those on "the other side" deserve whatever cruel fate meets them, simply because the male class of their society committed unjustifiable crimes.

I cannot think of anything less pro-woman, anything less feminist, than that.

[dapg-otmebytheballs]

They're so right though, tiktok and insta fans are like "catboy dan is so weird" meanwhile real ones have had 'pov: licking you' so often we're desensitised to Weird, the weirdness is the whole point of being here

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hiya sex witch

Hope ur having a good one!

I have a sexual health question. Im 28yo M and am as far as i am aware overall healthy, but sometimes i have trouble orgasming during sex, but rarely during masturbation. Im aware that contrary to popular belief men dont always orgasm 100% of the time and that there is nothing wrong with having difficulty with "keeping it up" so long as its not health related (i dont usually have difficulty with this part specifically, i just feel from experience that some times this is forgotten among people so i wanted to mention that)

I enjoy sex with my partners and im mentally very in the mood for it! Im not really nervous and havent felt pressured with them but some times it takes a very long time for me to finish, like more that 1.5 hours and up to 2 or 3 one time, and understandably my partners dont usually want to go that long lol i also find it frustrating because i feel the need around the 30-40minute mark but like i dont get that final push if that makes sense?

I did online searching and most answers are kinda wishy washy about causes other than excess masturbation, ive cut down on masturbation because alot of places say that that can be a cause but i only masturbated like once or twice a week and now im down to twice a month but it still happens.

Ive also heard that a too tight circumcision can lead to desensitisation and is what im kinda thinking this might be, i was circumcised at birth and have what the forskin restoration website ( www.restoringforeskin.org ) says is a RCI-0 or maybe RCI-1 which are considered super tight or tight respectively, both of which can lead to lack of sensation. And am considering maybe working on restoring my foreskin due to this, but i wanted your opinion on how like legit this all is considering it kinda sounds idk farfetched to me? Like being able to just stretch the skin back out with tape, is that even a thing? And does this sound like a possible cause?

Thanks for all your hard (no joke intended)'work and ur also awsome!

P.S. tumblr is being fucky on my phone all the time so if this is not anonymous please ignore/dm me to say make it anonymous again or whatever tanks

hi anon,

thank you so much for your question! it sounds like you've put a lot of thought into it already, and it was very interesting to read.

I have some hesitation in declaring that something is physically the matter with your penis, mainly because you mention that orgasm tends to come at a much more typical speed when you're masturbating. in the case of a physical problem I'd usually expect to see similar results whether you were having sex solo or partnered, which to me suggested it might be more of a mental/emotional blockage here?

but, having said that: I'm not a healthcare provider! and it sounds like a visit with one to discuss your observations might be really beneficial at this point.

while foreskin restoration is a thing, it's also a thing that doesn't have much research backing it up, and long-term results aren't very well known. consulting with a urologist before attempting a restoration sounds like it would be a great idea for you, as they could help confirm whether your foreskin is the problem and advise you on safely practicing restoration if it's an appropriate treatment. or, if that isn't the case, they're likely to have a much better idea about what else might be causing your situation.

best of luck!

[backwards360]

im 360'ing into your inbox

what do you think are some hobbies that noobs would have? so far i've got:

collecting chicken bones and making them into instruments/other assorted objects (whittling leg bones into flutes, wrapping fabric around a ribcage to make a shaker, ect)

fabric crafts (people spawn in with the clothes on their back right? seawatt has a cape, would other people have capes? thats a lot of extra fabric without any purpose. jackets, scarves and extra layers could be used as fabric, and chicken bones could be used as pins and/or needles)

singing and storytelling (strong biased headcanon here that noobs have a strong culture surrounding folklore and folksong. they cant read or write so these things are all passed via word of mouth. i also headcanon that everyone in a town will meet up regularly to sing together- at night so pros cant try to stop them)

painting (blood as a medium, anyone? chicken guts as a medium, anyone? thats really gross but like they eat raw chicken so at some point i assume you'd grow desensitised to it)

its really fun since they canonically have access to so few resources, i imagine they'd have to get really creative with it. if you want, then hobbies people on other layers could have (especially the fighter layer. i need to cook there..) then LMK!!!! i need to brainrot

OBSESSED WITH ALL THIS ACTUALLY!!!!!

i dont have a lot of ideas for noobs but im using this as a vague way to talk abt my jewelry headcanons and then ill get into other hobbies

so. the fighter level. i like to think they made jewelry to give to each other.

before a big fight loved ones would be given pieces of jewelry by their loved ones as a good luck charm but also as a sign to the opponent that this person has things to fight for.

eventually this spread to the other levels via fighters giving noob/pro/masters jewelry.

noobs very rarely get any and the ones they have arent very intricate (why waste your nice stuff on someone whose just going to die within the month)

pros have a decent amount but it doesnt play a huge role in their culture.

masters. masters love their jewelry. HUGE status symbol. the more you have the better you are to them.

especially after the fighter layer was erased and now no more people are making jewelry, every piece is priceless.

anyways!!!! other hobbies!!!

i have a few for fighters but like. no one else LMAO

- reading and writing!! they're the only ones with access to libraries so most of them enjoy both reading and writing

-p.parkour. obviously. but specifically battling friends!! a great way to practice battles and to have fun with your friends, you yield when you get to two hearts, one shot moves arent allowed obviously thatd just be killing someone

-dancing and festivals and stuff!!! culture on the fighter layer was soooo colorful trust trust

uhhhh yeah thats all i got i might add more later giggles

thanks for the ask !!!

[blorbocedes]

BROCEDES HG AU, what a holy string of letters!! Do they come from the same district? Do they view the games the same? Who does the capital like more? What weapons do they prefer?

tributes underestimating lewis and think his only skill is brute strength and that they'll see him coming swinging an axe but in actuality he and nico have a little game now.

nico will pretend to be bleeding out (berry juice), shot by an arrow, and lean against a tree staggering out of breath. other tributes will think 'oh easy kill.' and before they know it, there's an arrow in their eye or have a giant trap set because lewis is strategically up on a tree and can whittle almost anything. nico rolls his eyes because the damsel in distress act is a little emasculating but lewis shrugs, if it works it works

at the same time, there's so many things nico is desensitised to because he was groomed into this. like maybe another fellow poorer district just a kid approaches their camp, saying they need help and lewis hesitates while nico takes the shinzo abe gun he cobbled together and shoots the kid point blank. lewis is #traumatized and nico is like its us or them, and sure enough the kid had been sent as bait. but still, nico didn't know that.

its better for lewis to kill nico as the games get closer. but they're in their little cave around the fire and nico is asking with shiny eyes what the fuck is a mango. to describe its taste and texture. lewis surprised because he thought the rich kid districts lived like the Capitol decadence but the tropic/temperate nature he grew up in is totally foreign to the urban cyberpunk district nico grew up in. nico promises when they get out of this he'll make lewis try out all the processed brightly coloured synthetic electrolyte drinks they have in his district as nutrition supplements

When they get out of this...

[daytaker]

greetings from clown anon, adored the fic very silly <33

i apologise if i’m filling up your inbox but may i ask for an mc that’s a mortician? that or is just desensitised to death and knows a lot about it, like i imagine whenever the brothers in early season 1 used to do like very specific threats mc would be like “uh actually that’s not how that works” essentially acting like a bit of a smart ass completely glossing over the actual threat

thanksies in advance (´∀｀*)

Clown Anon MCs - [ Clowncore MC | Death-Fixated Science Geek MC | LeVeyan Satanist MC ]

(I'll be real I have no memory of the specific threats and I was too lazy to go look for them but I will follow along the lines of the prompt anyway.)

I'm going to do this one in bullet point form. Hope that's okay.

(CW: a bit gross at times. not quite gore.)

Now I Am Become MC, Destroyer of Worlds: A Death-Fixated Main Character in Obey Me!

Read below the cut.

They're extremely curious about demon anatomy. And not in a kinky way. They want to see how similar the structure and layout of demon organs are to human organs. They want to get full body X-rays when those wings and tails pop up. They want to get it on video when they appear and disappear. Because what the fuck. Yeah, yeah, they get it, magic exists, but still, what the fuck?!

They fully expect Beel to keel over and die one day from overeating. There is no way any single individual can consume the way he does and survive. They're actually hoping that if he does, they'll be able to carry out the post-mortem and see what exactly was going on with that stomach of his. I mean, yes, they'll be very sad he's gone, but at least he'll have died as a martyr to science!

Dead shadow hog? Taxidermied. Dead fire newt? Taxidermied. Dead devil zebra? Brought home, dissected, taxidermied. The brothers don't really like to go to their room because of the constant dizzying stench of formaldehyde that comes from it.

Sometimes they'll just sit and stare at one of the brothers. If asked what they're doing, they'll simply say, "Observing." Reactions to this range from Beel's "Oh, okay," to Levi's "I'M GOING TO MY ROOM AND NEVER LEAVING FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE."

So Solomon's immortal, is he? How immortal, exactly? Is it just that he'll never die from old age? Could he die of a disease? Surely he could die from injuries, right? Has he tested this? Can they test it? Please?

....Please?

Wait, wait, wait. Satan came from where? How? Why? What the hell? Lucifer, take your shirt off, they need to do some investigating. Satan, you too. Lucifer, show them your back. No scars? Not even from ripping your own wings off? Hm. Satan, do you have a bellybutton? ...That's weird, you definitely didn't need an umbilical cord. And you're saying he came out full-sized? Stop telling them it's magic! Magic is just science that people don't understand yet.

Actually, all of you get in here and strip, this has been a long time coming. MC needs to figure out what the hell is happening here.

Why not?

Pleeeease?

Satan, let's talk about one of your murder mysteries! They do this exactly one time, and never again because MC kept interrupting to point out plot holes and inconsistencies. It was so annoying. It kind of ruined the genre for him for a little while.

Leviathan, MC wants to ask you about how you survive underwater. Levi--- Hey, where are you going? Levi?

They write their paper on comparative anatomy of demons, angels, and humans. Diavolo gets a little queasy after the first page and gives them an A. He doesn't want to read the rest, he trusts they did a thorough job.

[bunglestraydogs]

Nobody but Oda and Atsushi really care for Dazai.

Before ANYONE starts coming after me viciously and saying that obviously it's not just them that care for Dazai, I know. I'm not saying nobody else cares. I'm just saying that these two cared the most and are genuinely worried for him. Well, were. RIP Oda. <3

Let me explain why.

We all are very much aware of the jumpscare we got in BSD Wan, right? Where we thought it was all cute and happy, and BAM we get fucking shot in the chest by Dazai's "When I go, I hope to go out just as beautifully."

HELLO? This was not okay. Usually, when we hear Dazai talking about suicide (save for Fifteen and The Dark Era) he's pretty whimsical about it, not ever really serious. Yet, here, we see just how serious he is. Atsushi does think he's half-joking at first, before he looks towards Dazai and just sees this dead, dull look in his eyes whilst he smiles at the sky. Atsushi is rattled by this, and genuinely distressed. Fuck me, I sobbed when I first watched this scene, I was not expecting the wholeass 180. Anyways, we see how upset Atsushi is by this statement. "Please don't say stuff like that, even as a joke." We still get zero reaction from Dazai. Nothing. Here, we see him without his usual comic relief mask, but he's still guarding himself.

Let me get into why I think.

Dazai has not had anyone genuinely care about him at any point in his life (excluding before he was 14, fuck knows what happened there) so far. Mori, who was essentially a really twisted and fucked up father figure, didn't care about his wellbeing much, except for the fact that he stopped him committing suicide multiple times for the first year that he knew him. Not out of the kindness of his heart, but due to the fact that Dazai was still a necessary pawn in Mori's plans, and he couldn't let him die yet. It literally says so in the Fifteen LN.

Chuuya cares about him to some extent. When Dazai gets wounded (and it's not inflicted by Chuuya) he gets worried and concerned. Prime example being during their fight with Lovecraft, when Dazai gets fucking slapped against a tree. Chuuya punches Lovecraft with a "heavy fist" and then immediately runs over to Dazai, making sure he's okay. When Dazai eventually looks up, Chuuya becomes shaken at how bad his wound is. Then, the next time that Dazai gets slapped again, Chuuya is very very shaken, as Dazai starts spouting off about how he's going to die, and his final words. Chuuya is clearly rattled, and is trying to get him to shut up, asking him what the hell he means. Then, obviously, Dazai is messing, and Chuuya grows anger. Despite Chuuya's hatred for Dazai, he is clearly concerned where his partner's wellbeing is involved. The first time they meet, Chuuya is once again shaken by Dazai when he says to "kill him now then", and is taken aback. Through the years, however, Chuuya becomes desensitised to Dazai's suicidal antics, and he even teases him when they reunite, asking him if he still wants to kill himself, then grows disappointed when Dazai outright admits to it.

Kunikida is of course concerned about his partner, but is also exasperated and annoyed by him. When Dazai goes missing, he even jabs at the fact that he could of actually succeeded in killing himself this time (he mentions that he's probably floating in a river somewhere). As he does mention, though, "That man's ability to avoid death approaches nightmare proficiency." Then Ranpo, "Not even the Port Mafia would be able to get the better of him." And Kenji, "Even after all those suicide attempts, he's still as lively as ever." This is obviously fucking true, all of it. He sees through everything and each step of his is carefully planned and atriculated. However, as Atsushi says, "Still, aren't you worried?" He knows this, and he understands what they're saying, but he is taken aback by their lack of care. Then, Tanizaki steps in, saying that he'll help look for him. King. Atsushi is happy about this clearly. Atsushi really cares for him already, and he doesn't understand why everyone else is so calm about this situation. It's because they all know that he'll get himself out of there in one piece, as he is able to avoid these types of things expertly and deftly. However, Atsushi still is worried for Dazai. Kunikida has been Dazai's partner for two years now, and so he knows all of his antics and tricks, much like Chuuya. Chuuya, however, knows him better and more in depth. Because the ADA Dazai isn't really him. Of course, it is him, but with his darker side hidden a lot more. I don't think he's ever revealed it to any of the members except for Kunikida during his entrance exam. The rest all think of him as some goofball who's good at what he does and has a passion for suicide and women. However, Chuuya knows him as a twisted, unwell guy with a passion for suicide and all things dark, with a but of a wacky side to him. These two parallells still have one thing in common, however, and that's obviously suicide. Anyways, sorry, I was getting out of hand. Kunikida clearly cares for Dazai and his wellbeing, but again, is also infuriated by him and his attempts at suicide, which nobody takes seriously.

Mori. Fuck, man. This guy? Real piece of shit. Sees Dazai as an asset in his plan, nothing more, nothing less. He values him as a Port Mafia member, not a human being. The dehumanising nature of Mori greatly impacts Dazai and his quest for death; Mori exacerbates this multiple times. Yes, he stops him continuously from killing himself, but once again, only because he needs him as a piece in his game plan. He was the sole witness to his promotion as the boss of the Port Mafia, he can't have him go die on him now. So, he keeps a close watch on Dazai, surveillance constant. He controls and manipulates the shit out of him, using his craving for death as a means to get him to do what he wants, bargaining a drug for a comfortable way out in exchange for him doing missions for him, to which Dazai expects, wanting him to make him that drug. Mori saved him at 14, yet Dazai continues to attempt suicide countless times in just that one year. Mori does not care for his wellbeing, mentally or physically. He drives him out of the mafia with Oda's death, yet still expects him to want to come back as an executive. Despite claiming that he didn't drive Dazai out of the mafia, he indirectly did so. Now, I don't know if he sent Oda into this with the expectation that Dazai was going to leave, but I think he did but also don't think he did? I think he did this as a means to get Dazai more under his control and manipulate him, because he knew how close they were and he knew exactly what strings to pull to get Dazai to snap. Except, I don't think he predicted Dazai actually leaving the Port Mafia, because he couldn't of predicted what Oda would say to Dazai, and he couldn't of predicted how deep their bond was.

This brings me to my main and next point; Oda was the only one who ever cared for Dazai. Ango of course did, but not to the extent of Oda. I don't know if many people have read it, but if you haven't, spoilers for 'The Time I Picked Up Dazai' under the cut.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the book, we see just how much Oda begins to really care about Dazai, despite him initially being some shady kid that turned up half dead on his doorstep. He ties him up to his bed just so that he won't try and escape and kill himself, as he exclaims to Oda. Oda goes through so many measures to make sure Dazai doesn't kill himself. Three times. Three fucking times. The first time being Dazai crawling to the door to try and get out so that he can get out of Oda's way and die in peace. The second time, he literally fights Oda because he's trying to stab himself. Then, two seconds later, tries to kill himself with the kettle. Oda has to physically stop him. Oda has to fucking strangle him unconcious to get him to stop. Despite meeting him only three days prior, he cares about his wellbeing. Part of the reason is obviously that he doesn't want a dead kid on his hands, but the other part is that he's growing to care for Dazai. All throughout this little book, we see little glimpses of Oda's genuine concern for Dazai. Obviously at first, he was debating just leaving him on the doorstep, because it wasn't really his issue. Yet, he still drags Dazai back to the bed and ties him up when he tries crawling out the house. In the Dark Era, we see him (in the alley scene) tell Dazai to stop talking after he almost gets shot, because he knows that he's just chatting shit. However, in the book (holy shit, it made me cry when I read it) this happens instead;

The way he described Dazai at the end of this scene kind of broke me. "That of a child about to burst into tears." Now, I don't know whether he meant that Dazai was so happy to finally just, you know, die, or that Dazai was just a troubled child. Both, I think. Odasaku sees Dazai as a child, just a child, and the fact that he wants to die so bad and has such a warped perception of the world genuinely hurts Odasaku. He doesn't want to see Dazai like that; it upsets him. He's genuinely angry at what Dazai did, much like how a father would be angry. He can't stand when Dazai's like this because it breaks his heart. Despite Ango scolding him for letting Dazai speak like that, as he will just start going more off the rails, Oda does tell Dazai not to be like that, and is concerned when he is and when he's serious about it, as opposed to him being whimsical about it in the bar. Ango and Odasaku are like father/brother figures to Dazai, they're fond of him and care about him deeply. Which is why it hurts Dazai so much when it starts falling apart. Bungou Stray Dogs fucking breaks me, because in the scene (I haven't finished The Dark Era LN yet, I'm sorry-) in the anime where Dazai is talking about how everything he loves or wants always leaves in the end whenever he obtains them. And so, when Odasaku died, despite how much Dazai prepared for the things he loves to be lost, he couldn't prepare for it at all. And when he finally loses it, he's lost the final stable thing in his life. His attempt at wanting to live had left. His friendship with Oda and Ango was stained with Ango's betrayal. His life in the Port Mafia became dull and depressing. His attempt at trying to live failed. And his best friend died in his fucking arms.

Then Atushi comes in, and reminds him of all he's lost, yet also all he wants to save and achieve. He raises Atushi, because that's what Oda would have wanted. He raises him because it's the right thing to do, and he wants to be there for him. But he doesn't expect Atsushi to begin to actually hold a deep fondness of him. Dazai, as we all know, cannot handle compliments or being cared for, because it's something so rare and foreign to him. So, even though it's supposed to be funny and nice, BSD Wan really hits fucking hard with this one. He doesn't realise that anyone actually cares for him; evil expects evil from others, as he said. Dazai is constantly on guard, cautious and reserved and shielded. He doesn't want to be hurt again. And so, when Atsushi says shit like this, it catches him off guard, but he can't let that show. He can't let anyone see him vulnerable, because everybody has an ulterior motive. He's going to be used for something.

Sound familiar?

SIGMA.

I know, jumpscare, right?

Bet you weren't expecting me to fucking jump to him.

But, I think that's why Dazai actually cares for Sigma in the little time he's come to know him. "I see. So that's how it is." He says after we see Sigma's internal monologue. Not going to lie, I think Dazai sees a bit of himself in Sigma and is trying to save him from that, and show him that not everyone tries to use him, and that he's safe with him and the ADA, which fucking works when Fyodor tries to manipulate him and Sigma pulls out a fucking UNO reverse card on him, and stands his ground, because he won't be used anymore. Dazai has never been able to confront Mori properly about anything, and so if he can let someone else feel what he wishes he could, then that would make him happy. Plus, Sigma's technically an orphan lol.

Another thing of importance to note is

Okay sorry I've been sat here for about five minutes trying to remember and I can't FUCK.

Anyways, the care from Atsushi that Dazai gets is foreign to him. He doesn't know how to respond, so he just doesn't respond at all. Because it hurts too much, and reminds him of Oda.

I THINK I REMEMBERED BUT I DON'T KNOW IF THIS WAS IT.

Anyways, despite it being what I thought of or not, it's a key point to make. When Atsushi's orphanage Director passes away, and he doesn't know how to feel, it's Dazai there to help him through it as he faces the loss of a "loved" one. He doesn't know how to feel about the Director's death. He was someone who raised him, someone who was always there. Except, the Director was a sick, twisted and cruel man, despite him only trying to prepare Atsushi from the worst and save him from what he went through himself and what Atsushi's parents did to him. Clearly not the correct way to raise a kid. However, Dazai tells him "When someone's father dies, they tend to cry." Dazai; emotionless, inhuman and uncaring. This is how Chuuya sees him in his Port Mafia days. This is how everyone saw him; someone to be feared for his lack of humanity and twisted way of dealing with things, his warped perceptions of the universe. Yet, when Odasaku dies, it's the only time we see Dazai crying, and it's the most upset or nervous or emotional we've seen him; the guy's a fucking wreck. This just broke me when he said that, not just because poor fucking Atsushi, but also because Oda was a father figure to Dazai. The only time we have seen him cry was of course Oda. And when he says that to Atsushi, my heart breaks. Literally crumbles. This series is actually god awful, I hate it.

In conclusion, Dazai obviously doesn't respond well to compliments or worries about his wellbeing, and Atsushi reminds him too much of Oda. Everything Atsushi is and does; Atsushi, who he's took under his wing as an orphan. Atsushi, who doesn't see the value or meaning in killing people. Atsushi, who asked Aku to be a mafia member who doesn't kill. Atsushi, who took in Kyouka, despite her flaws, and Dazai had to be there to explain that no matter what, she could be in the ADA, despite her kills, despite being an assassin, despite being in the PM. This shit hits hard for him, and I hate it so much.

Anyways, sorry for this long ass rant but it just kills me how nobody actually thinks to look deeper into Dazai's suicidal tendencies, as he's clearly not okay. Atsushi and Oda are the only one's who have ever thought to pursue it, and actively stop him from thinking like that.

I hope you're all having a lovely day/night! <3

[permettez-moi]

I wonder if either Will or Halt ever have emotions towards all the people they've killed. Does it leave them cold? Do they have breakdowns about it? Does their first kill haunt them?

Like I can imagine that Halt at some point got completely desensitised towards murder, first as a trauma response (Ferris) and then because not having any feelings is just easier.

Similar with Will, I believe in canon, he has a small panick after his first kill? Not sure. But I can believe it either way. It never becomes easy, but it's 'okay' and 'they're bad people' he tells themselves. Then Rhul comes along, and Will goes absolutely crazy on him, thirsting for revenge, and suddenly that doesn't work anymore. He keeps trying to tell himself 'I'm doing this because they're bad people and I'm doing my job protecting others' but it's not quite true and so he can't really believe that.

Also, imagine, Maddie comes into his life, he heals. And then it hits him, the lives he's taken were imprisonment would’ve been enough. And he realises, truly, for the first time, that there is blood on his hands

[kindestofkings]

in a world of boys, he's a gentleman

ryan mcmahon x reader

authors note: this is so sweet and fluffy you'll probs need to visit the dentist, but its for all you ryan girlies out there xx

yourusername

location: italy!

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yourusername italy you have our hearts, lush few days away before pretty boy goes back on tour <33

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ryanmcmahon_15 you could come with me...

yourusername loveee I've got school :(

yourmum photos look fab darlings!

yourusername thanks mam💗💗

elijahhewson about time you give that handsome fella back to me !

yourusername posted on their story:

-yourusername harrys house ready!!!

ryanmcmahon_15

location: harry's house

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

view all 200 comments

yourusername I adore you almost as much as I adore Harry Styles.

bobbyskeetz wow mate thats saying something

yourusername SO proud of you boys!! have come along way since workmans x

(liked by elijahhewson,bobbyskeetz, ryanmcmahon_15 and joshjenkinson_)

ryanmcmahon_15 my number one supporter the whole time inhalerfan1 who is this girl? inhalerfan2 shes ryans girlfriend! pretty sure they've been dating since they were like 17ish

inhalerfan2 incredible 🔥🔥🔥

inhalerfan3 you made harry’s house a harry home

yourusername

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yourusername corporate needs you to find the differences between this picture and this picture...

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joshjenkinson_ THEY'RE THE SAME PICTURE

bobbyskeetz how hard is it being a sidepiece even tho you've been been dating ryan for 8 years?

yourusername i've become desensitised at this point elijahhewson better to be a side piece over a no piece xx joshjenkinson_ no piece hahah yourusername how are you the same man that wrote if you're gonna break my heart??

inhalerfan1 you get it

ryanmcmahon_15 its not what it looks like....

yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername FACT Ireland is beautiful this time of year. FACT my boyfriend is the cutest and I miss him terribly. FACT my brain hurts from school.

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ryanmcmahon_15 all the hard work is gonna pay off !!

(liked my yourusername)

yourmam forget about that tour business, shes miserable here! ryanmcmahon_15

yourusername mammmmm making me look uncoolllll ryanmcmahon_15 😂😂

inhalerfan1 I just found out about her a week ago but these two are my parents

inhalerfan2 do you mind me asking what are you studying?

yourusername no of course not! i'm doing a phd at the moment in human rights law, in dublin <3 inhalerfan2 no way thats so cool! bobbyskeetz our brainbox !

yourusername

location: holibobs!

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yourusername love a travel moment we do x

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ryanmcmahon_15 you feelin moody with your b&w theme?

yourusername trying to channel my inner lewevans ! hows it working ? lewevans a little too good, please dont put me out of a job !!

elijahhewson hes travelled to more places with me, just saying :))

yourusername yeah but does he kiss you in a photobooth? yourusername ACTUALLY DONT ANSWER THAT I DONT WANT TO KNOW GUGGI joshjenkinson_ you defo dont want to know.. yourusername ahhhhh JOSH

yourusername posted on their story:

yourusername my favourite person dressed up as my favourite singer and I have to watch it through blurry insta lives 😭😭

replies

ryanmcmahon_15 lovieee thought you'd enjoy it, now i feel cruel yourusername dont its literally the best thing you've ever done, never looked hotter!

bobbyskeetz

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bobbyskeetz the ryan fella is a scrubbed up even though tour is over? confusion

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joshjenkinson_ looking good for the big day 🔥

inhalerfan2 explain yourselves please!!!!

elijahhewson officaily lost him 💔

inhalerfan1 oh my god what is happening!!!!

inhalerdublin

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inhalerdublin it may not be music related news but we have a NEWLY WED in the band, our lovely drummer finally tied the knot with an even lovelier cailín <33

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joshjenkinson_ crackin day!

elijahhewson still emotional, OUR PARENTS

 bobbyskeetz hangover of hell today but it was worth it 🤘🏼🤘🏼

evehewson what a stunning bride, congrats !!

lewevans the best just got better! thanks for including me in the big day

yourusername are you kidding me? THANK YOU for your amazing photos! (liked by ryanmcmahon_15)

inhalerfan1 you are joking me this is so beautiful

inhalerfan2 why am I crying over two strangers getting married?!?!

yourusername

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yourusername just had a dream weekend and married my bestfriend.

never imagined getting married so young but when you know you know, and you certainly do not let a man like ryan pass you by.

my husband <3

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ryanmcmahon_15 the love of my life, my wife <3

inhalerfan1 literally the most beautiful wedding ever!

inhalerfan2 awhhhh congrats!

yourmam such a beautiful day celebrating you two!! my favourites xx

inhalerdublin our parents 💗💗💗

(liked by elijahhewson,bobbyskeetz, ryanmcmahon_15 and joshjenkinson_)

--finito--

lol dont even know where that marriage came from Im still undecided if i believe in the concept, but its cute lol!

hope you enjoyed <3

[celestie0]

The amount of works on tumblr that are just graphic smut compared to more emotional or comforting fics is so skewed now. I feel like 95% of fics are smut, and I don’t want to yuck anybodies yum because I definitely read it from time to time, but I feel there’s massive shift in why people read fanfics. It feels like a lot of x readers now are people just wanting to imagine getting fucked in 50 crazy positions by a fictional person with the biggest dick ever who also has unlimited stamina, so its what people expect. They only log on to see some hot porn and log off, so spending some time invested into a fanfic where they’re not immediately met with the reader getting sent to pound town, people get some kind of anticipation anxiety? I’ve noticed a trend of people being very desensitised to this constant porn on the timeline and then feeling entitled enough to request explicit scenes, as if it’s a requirement for a fanfiction.

oh i soooooo agree w you about the anticipation anxiety, and i think that's why i get asks that pressure for smut. it's because that's all they're focused on, even when reading a long fic w structure, and it's too distracting to the point that they can't really focus on any other aspect of the story other than just waiting for the smut to happen. which is fine i suppose, just hope they'd leave it out my inbox!

anywho thanks for the support bb <3

[theflyindutchwoman]

You need help studying? There's no way I would have scored as well on the sergeant's exam without you. That's true. You owe me. I don't owe you. You owe me. Okay.

| ANATOMY OF A SCENE - CHENFORD EDITION 5.19 - A Hole in the World

There's something quite adroit in the way this scene has intricately woven so many different threads, both from this episode and from the past, showing us how much Tim and Lucy have influenced and learned from each other.

Like how Tim allows himself to be more vulnerable… As implied, this is not the first time that he had to take a life in the line of duty. But despite this, he didn't let himself become desensitised to death. We've seen time and time again Tim taking responsibilities for things that, sometimes, he couldn't even control, so it is not that surprising that he would let himself feel the burden, the cost of taking a life. What's different is how he allows others to see him that vulnerable. And not just Lucy - she has, after all, always been the exception. He doesn't try to hide his emotions from Grey either. Not the way he used to, like when he went back to work after he got shot. He doesn't minimise what he's going through. He doesn't refuse help. And this just demonstrates how much Tim's walls have lowered. Something that Lucy played a primordial role in. The way she's practically clinging to his arm, as if she's trying to anchor him in the present and remind him that he's not alone, not anymore, is such a Lucy thing. She's providing him with a lifeline, while reassuring herself that he's alright as well - at least physically. She just wants to help, which is her nature. This is so reminiscent of how she was trying to help Nolan get past his first shooting. Also for two persons who have never been big on PDAs in their previous relationships, it's absolutely amazing how openly physical these two are with each other, especially at work. It's like a dam has broken now that they're together. It's just so effortless.

Lucy's not the only one who rubbed off on the other. Her advice to Tim - to exercise before going to bed - is quite similar to what he told her after dealing with Rosalind's mess the first time. The circumstances are different but the point is the same : give the brain a different focus. Which he does immediately, by changing the topic and concentrating on Lucy. Her face when Tim credits her for his success is so touching. She never expects anyone to acknowledge her efforts and helping ways, let alone fully appreciate and recognise her for them. She always goes out of her way to help people, even though it sometimes backfires and is used against her… So to have Tim, someone she loves, giving her her flowers in no uncertain terms, is absolutely important. Not only that, but I'm not even sure anyone has ever taken the time to help her out like that. Jackson and John probably did, but they were in the same boat. Here, she has someone who is going out of his way to help her. The way these two always support each other in their career is so special.

And just like Tim earlier, she doesn't know how to react. So she deflects a bit and flirts with him. She goes to playful so fast, with the way she teases him, grabbing his jacket, that he barely has time to catch up with her. We can't really see since the camera is on Lucy but Tim is smiling when she tells him he owes her. She just broke his brain - again. I don't think I ever saw a man so whipped and loving it as much as him...