#These two are probably one of the only fics I stan.... I have this mindset where all fics are cringe lol... These two were exceptions

[unfo11owmelol]

Speaking of old fanfiction getting updated because of the quarantine--- there's actually two AU ikemarth fics I wanted updated... Sadly one author seems to have moved onto other fandoms and the other one seems to have deleted the fic all together but Holy fck they were both at such intense parts---it was a goddamn shame it never continued

The ones I'm talking about are Walls Apart and Hyrule Cafe (or something like that)

Walls Apart was this really intense highschool drama where marth was the smartest kid at an orphanage but he got mistreated by other kids daily (and possibly abused by the orphanage caretakers too) ... When wins a scholarship to the most prestigious and luxurious academy he thinks he can escape his wretched life there---but he gets roped into shady business, such as being forced to crossdress to improve the low scores of their female students--and apparently scholarship students at that academy gets targeted & discriminated for some reason, I think mostly because they are poor and the students are rich, and oh my god---he meets the GHOSTS of the previous scholarship students---two of these which are they're trying to help him survive this school?? And somewhere in the last chapters he meets an entire group of dead scholarship students?!?! Oh my god I wish I could find it again and I wish the author didn't delete it. It was such a wild story I love it

Hyrule Cafe was also this really cute lighthearted modern college AU where Ike, Roy and Marth live together and Ike starts working at the same cafe as Marth does---but the fcking twist is that the Cafe gives costume shows at night---in which Marth is a part of--And in which the cafe owner makes him crossdress... he hates but its getting him paid, still its embarrassing so he's trying to make sure Ike never finds out about his night shifts---BUT LMAO the secret eventually leaks out (from Link) and the cafe owner (Zelda) strikes a deal with ike, he gets a costume from her in secret and gets to work a night shift together with marth, without his knowledge. In which Ike is super pumped to the idea it's fcking glorious. XD

It ended with a huge cliffhanger of where they finally meet in costume---But It also ended on some drama where Roy mentioned that the reason why Marth hasn't dated anyone these days was because he had a stalker that almost pushed him off the stairs when they got rejected, and he's been in edge ever since---and a mcfriggin S*x-shop owner ganondorf wanting to take marth away from the cafe and hire him for his shop--DUDE IT WAS SO INTENSE I REALLY WISHED IT CONTINUED

And I usually hate fanfiction, what the hell

[alisonsfics]

how could i hate you?

pairing: sebastian stan x reader

request: “would you mind writing a sebastian stan x reader fic? i had this idea where the reader & him have been dating for a while. he meets her parents & the readers parents are super rude & small minded. the reader is worried about how he’ll react. you decide the ending. can it be angst & fluff? it’s personal” - 🥺 anon

word count: 2k

warnings: controlling and derogatory parents, swearing (use of the word f***ing, but it only occurs once)

“Hey, sweetheart? You almost ready?” Your boyfriend called to you, from the other room. You were trying to put on a necklace, but you couldn’t get the clasp to close because your hands were so shaky. “Almost” you croaked, trying to push back the tears.

Tonight, you were taking Sebastian to dinner with your parents. He was going to meet them for the first time. Your nerves had consumed your entire body. Your hands were shaking, and you could feel your heart in your throat.

You loved your parents, but they tended to be hypercritical. They had both lived in a small town their entire lives. Small towns breed small mindsets. They weren’t the most supportive when you decided to move to Los Angeles. They didn’t understand the appeal of a big city.

You could handle their criticism, but the last thing you wanted was for them to be rude to Sebastian. He cared so much about their approval, and you wanted him to have it.

Sebastian peeked his head into the bathroom and saw the tears that were welling up in your eyes. Before even saying a word, he enveloped you in a hug. He kept his arms wrapped tightly around you. “What's wrong, sweetheart?” He asked, while rubbing your back.

You took a deep breath and pulled out of the hug. Sebastian had a worried expression on his face. He cupped your face and left a soft kiss on your lips. “You can talk to me” he said, softly. You nodded.

“I’m really fucking nervous about tonight” you told him, your voice breaking. He pulled you back into a hug and pressed kisses into your hair. “It’ll be okay. I promise” he assured you, but you couldn’t even let yourself believe his words.

You held the collar of his shirt and buried your face in his chest. “I know how they are, Seb. They’ve always been super critical. I don’t want them to say anything rude to you” you mumbled into his chest.

He hummed, letting you know that he understood. “I’ll be fine. I’ve dealt with criticism before. Besides, how could they not like me. I’m pretty amazing, right?” He joked, causing you to giggle.

You pulled away and lightly hit his arm. “There’s that smile” he said, smiling to himself. He took the necklace out of your hand and gestured for you to turn around. He clipped the hook together and then spun you around. “It’ll all be okay” he said, before taking your arm and pulling towards the front door.

As you drove down the highway, you started to tap your fingers on your thigh. It was your tell tale sign that you were nervous. Sebastian, knowing all of your little quirks, noticed instantly. He reached his hand over and interlaced his fingers with yours. “It’s just one dinner” he said, softly.

The words brought you comfort. Your parents could attack every part of Sebastian’s character, but it was still just one night. You both could home and pretend it never happened. While you wanted their approval, you didn’t need it to be happy.

He pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant. Before unlocking the doors, he looked over at you. “I’ll be right by your side the whole time” he said, giving you a gentle kiss. He let you take a few deep breaths, and then you both got out of the car.

You saw your parents sitting on a bench outside. They smiled when they saw you both walking towards them. You could tell it was a fake smile, but you allowed it to go unmentioned.

“You’re only ten minutes late. That’s a new record” your mom whispered, as she pulled you into a hug. You pulled away and kept an equally not-genuine smile on your face.

“Mom and Dad, meet Sebastian” you said, introducing them officially. He gave your mother a hug, and then moved to your father, shaking his hand. “That’s a nice car you have. A little expensive for my taste, but nice” your dad said, giving his signature backhanded compliment. Sebastian noticed, but just thanked him, trying to make a good impression.

Sebastian quickly opened the front door to the restaurant and allowed you all to walk inside. His hand found its familiar spot on the small of your back as you all waited for the hostess. He gave you a hopeful smile when your parents looked away.

Eventually, the hostess walked over to the stand. “Hello. I have a reservation for four. It should be under Stan” Sebastian told her. She nodded before grabbing a stack of menus and leaded you all through the restaurant.

You made it to the private room that Sebastian had requested. “Oh a private room? He’s already trying to win us over with his money” your mother sharply remarked, barely above a whisper. Sebastian pulled your seat out for you, and you all took your seats.

“So why did you pick this restaurant?” Your dad asked, at least trying to make conversation. Sebastian lit up as he remembered the story that followed along. He gestured to you, letting you tell the story.

“This was the restaurant that Sebastian took me to on our first date. I remember how nervous he was. He wanted everything to be perfect. He ordered me one of every dessert, so I wouldn’t have to pick” you said, resting your hand on top of Sebastian’s on the table. Your parents smiled as you told them the story, and you hoped it was a good sign.

“So how did you two meet?” Your mom asked you. Sebastian looked over at you, as if asking permission to tell the story. You gave him a reassuring nod. “We met at a wedding. We both knew the bride and were invited to the wedding. We got seated next to each other during the reception, and we got along really well. The rest is history” he said, smiling over at you.

It was heart warming to watch Sebastian reminisce over the night it all began. A lot had changed since then, but he was still your rock.

After a dinner full of snarky remarks and subtle insults, you were about to blow. Sebastian had his hand on your thigh, and he was trying to calm you down. All the insults had been directed towards him, but he was the one who kept a level head. You, on the other hand, wanted to scream at your parents.

You were almost done. You just had to wait to pay the check, and then you could go home and pretend this night never happened. You were so close. The waiter set down the check, and it was like you could see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Sebastian reached for the check. You heard your dad scoff under his breath. You snapped.

“Alright. Out with it. What could you possibly have to say?” You asked, finally breaking. Your mom looked taken aback. “I’m just not shocked that Mr. Hollywood is trying to pay for dinner. He’s made it clear that he thinks he’s better than us” your dad said, crossing his arms.

It made your blood boil. “He’s buying you dinner. Why can’t that just be a nice thing?” You asked. You genuinely wanted to know why they were so offended by every nice gesture Sebastian made.

Your mom's expression changed as though she had been insulted. “It’s not just about paying for dinner. He’s trying to show us how much money he has. He thinks he’s better than us because he’s a fancy movie star. So what if we live in a small town? At least we appreciate the small things. All he does is spend Daddy’s money. He’s probably never had to work a day in his life. You actors are all the same” your mom chimed in.

Now, you were glad you were in a private room, so no one had to hear your screaming fest. You instinctively reached for Sebastian’s hand. You stood up from the table, taking him with you. “We’re leaving” you said, before heading towards the door. You pulled Sebastian with you.

You stopped before you grabbed the door handle and turned around to face your parents. “You know what? I have dealt with your criticism all of my life, but you are not going to attack Sebastian. He took you out to a nice dinner, and he has done nothing but be polite and kind to you. Also, he has earned every bit of his success. He left Romania at eight years old, and he built himself an amazing life. So, don’t sit here and tell me who he is. He is a loving boyfriend, and that is all that should matter to you” you said.

You turned to leave the restaurant and had to fight back the tears. Sebastian kept his arm wrapped around your waist as you exited the building. “I’ve got you” he whispered in your ear.

When you finally made it outside, he pulled you right into his arms. “Please, don’t hate me” you mumbled into chest. He pulled away from you, and all you saw on his face was confusion. “How could I hate you?” He asked, his voice softening.

“Because I was the one who said yes when they asked to meet you. I should have said no. I should have made up an excuse. I should not have made you sit through that excruciating dinner. I am so sorry” you apologized, genuinely. He cupped your face, and you could see his heart break. “Baby, I could never hate you. None of what happened in there was your fault” he assured you.

You felt a tear run down on your cheek. You felt responsible for your parent’s actions. “But they were horrible in there” you told him, confused. He wiped away your tears, hoping to wipe away the whole experience with them. “I don’t need anyone’s permission to love you” he said, before leaning in to kiss you.

“Thank you” you said, pulling him into a hug. Sebastian was always there for you when you needed it. He always knew how to calm you down. “Of course, sweetheart. Now, go sit in the car. I left my phone inside. I’ll be back in five minutes” he said, kissing your temple. You nodded and headed towards the car.

Sebastian walked back inside, but it wasn’t to grab his phone. His phone was right in his back pocket. He had kept his cool throughout dinner because you were at his side, but he had to stand up for you and himself.

He walked back to the room and found your parents still there. They were talking to each other and wore disgusted expressions. “Oh, he’s back” your dad said, his voice filled with disappointment.

Sebastian took a deep breath and maintained his composure. “I know you don’t like me, so I’m going to say this once. I love your daughter. She's the reason that I sat through this entire dinner and continued to be polite and smile. I don’t care if you approve of me, but in front of her, you will at least be civil with me. I had to watch her cry in the parking lot because she was worried you two would scare me off. I had to watch her worry that I might just walk away. You broke her heart tonight. If you do it again, I won’t be this polite” he said, before walking out of the room. He walked straight to the car, without any form of expression on his face.

When he got in the car, he simply gave you a smile. You were still worried. “Did they say anything else to you?” You asked him. He shook his head and took your hand in his. “They had already left” he lied, dismissively.

You nodded and gazed out the window. “I love you, you know that, right?” Sebastian asked, causing you to look over at him. “Of course I know that. I love you too” You asked him, confused.

He shrugged. “I just wanted to remind you that I’m never going to leave you” he told you, genuinely.

taglist: @laurakirsten0502 @miraclesoflove @nathaliabakes @millipop18 @azghedaheda @shyinadarkplace @vanteguccir @missroro @bookfrog242 @buckys-babe17 @ice-dtae @leyannrae @sia2raw @sunwardsss @studentville-struggles @impossibleapricotlampbat @infjkiki @k-k0129 @lickmymelaninn @hailey-a-s @andreasworlsboring101 @fanofalltheficsx @lukes-orange-beanie @golden-hoax @madisondelstan @spookyparadisesheep @n3ssm0nique @v-is-obsessive @reniescarlett @multiplums @alotofrandomfangirling @helium-queen @bbl32 @who-the-hell-is-sebastianstan @blueeyeddemon1016

Let me know if you want to be added to my taglist for all my imagines or for a specific character/fandom!!

Requests OPEN

[destinygoldenstar]

Total Drama World Tour My Way

Don't get me wrong, I actually really like World Tour, but I said this before, I have some issues with the season's elimination order. Mainly those problems stem from Team Victory losing all the time, defeating the purpose of three teams.

So this is just a my way on how I personally would have had the elimination order be.

Now, while I am not adding any cast members, or removing any, I AM gonna CHANGE who's on which team. My reason for this is so that we don't have to favor Team Amazon since they have the most plot relevant characters, and for that reason as well, we also don't have to trash on the other two teams as much

So with that said...

I'm changing to...

Uh...

So this doesn't sound like a big grandeos change, but it could definitely make all the difference

So first elimination in canon is with Duncan quitting.

Will I keep that the same?

I'm gonna say yes

Like, we don't need Duncan having a lion share of screen time like he always seems to, so this was actually kind of a decent call. It's a flawed call, from what happens later, but... you know what I mean

Same goes for Ezekiel...

Like... what are you going to change there?

You could make a fic where he makes it far and even wins, but for a CANON scenario? Eh?

(Sorry Zeke stans)

So Episode 3,

In canon, Harold quit, and DJ would have been voted off...

I'm actually going to have DJ go out like he should have

The animal curse thing is just not funny and I don't think even goes anywhere.

So if we want to save DJ's character from suffering, get him out of the game as soon as we can

Episode 4,

I'm actually gonna keep Bridgette's elimination

Would she still try to kiss Al? Probably not.

Like, I think Duncan is the ONLY character who gets called out for cheating. Meanwhile everyone else who does it seem to get a pass.

Like, Courtney, Beth, Bridgette, Trent (okay that one was a trick to be fair)? "Nah, that's fine"

Episode 5, non elimination

Episode 7...

That's a tough one

I feel like since they're on the same team here, Leshawna and Heather would be in a conflict about Alejandro and who to believe.

So it's 50/50 whether or not Leshawna would still slap Heather

Regardless, would we still have her be eliminated?

I'm actually gonna have Team Chris lose this

And Lindsay gets the boot

The reason for this is because this is also the episode where she remembers Tyler... and after that, her plotline is basically done

Plus, I think Alejandro would just HATE her as a teammate, so he'd probably cause the loss, but throw Lindsay under the bus

Noah would probably vote off Lindsay for that, since he's, you know, very proud of the brains department

Episode 8...

I'm gonna do something

This is gonna be framed like an elimination round...

BUT, the person that gets voted off, will actually SWITCH TEAMS

So I'm gonna say Team Amazon loses, they vote off... I'm gonna say Cody, for the medicine incident going out of hand

So he moves to Team Victory

Sierra... not happy

Episode 9

Every team's evened out with 4 people

Now who loses this?

I'm gonna say Team Victory loses

And they vote off Harold here

Why this?

Well now he had six extra episodes to develop this 'egotistical mindset going out of hand', for him. By that point, while I think he'd feel guilty over DJ and Bridgette's boot, I think this is where'd he be called out further by Leshawna and especially Heather for his leadership attempts failing. Cody would be on their team now, he'd be occupied with Sierra being mad at him for voting her and all of that, plus they're not on the same team anymore. So I think THIS is where Harold would vote for himself over voting Cody, ultimately preventing a tie so that he'd take responsibility for pretending he had certain mad skills he didn't have. Or using them for selfish reasons, I guess that's better.

Plus now, we get him and Heather's friendship, and his and Leshawna's relationship a bit, which I actually like those

Episode 10, non elimination

Episode 11,

You know what this is, Izzy gets Brainvilla'd and she gets taken away by the military, sad sad :(

And then I'm actually gonna eliminate Leshawna here.

Reason?

It's similar to DJ's situation, except she would eventually see through Alejandro, only too late, leaving Heather ticked. Cause they're still friends here, Leshawna and Heather be working together here. By the way, what I mean is not 'she has the animal curse instead of DJ' I mean her story would relatively continue from Action, with her recognizing she has no desire to win over people close to her. At least that's how I read it. So instead she'd more so focus on being the heart of her team. Harold being gone, Alejandro being a bro to her, not necessarily a romantic interest, and then that gets shattered over... some false idea on what her victory is Alejandro drilled in her head.

Episode 13

First off, Duncan comes back. Boo hoo, I know

He's actually joining Team Victory here

And then I'm gonna eliminate Tyler from Team Amazon

Ultimately, Team Amazon capturing Duncan or whatever doesn't save them. It really shouldn't have.

And why Tyler? Because Courtney and Gwen are on good terms, (for now) and Alejandro convinced Courtney or someone here that Tyler was behind something when he wasn't

I would note though that despite this, we could give Tyler some individual characterization, not just be Lindsay's love interest. I can see him forming some other friendships here. Even in canon, he was just kind of a plot device until he got eliminated

Episode 14, this straight up won't be an elimination. Just no bias here from Chris, just it was planned from the start

Note though that instead of Tyler catching Duncan and Gwen kissing, it's Noah. BUT, he keeps it to himself for now, because unlike Tyler, Noah isn't so gullible.

Episode 15,

Who do I eliminate here?

There's no Tyler to boot now...

So one of these love triangle birds is gonna get it

If Victory loses, Duncan goes, because Heather and Cody are on good terms

If Chris loses, I would probably boot Owen, but then I'd have to keep the love triangle longer. I don't want to do that, because a lot of you will hate me if I do.

So I'm not gonna do that, Team Chris wins it.

Team Amazon...

In this universe, Courtney doesn't know about the kiss yet.

This episode, she gets that info from Noah, who is a secondary antag in this, collabing with Alejandro. She confronts Duncan about it in disbelief, she finds out it's true, she does the violent actions she does, and she lashes out at Gwen and throw the challenge.

In MY WAY, Courtney would actually get consequences for acting like some brutal assassin, and get voted off for it.

I mean... come on. Courtney is the LAST person I expect to fall for Al, let alone as long as she did, and second, I PERSONALLY didn't like that Courtney got away with her behavior, and deemed as a victim. Yes, she's a victim, but she went at it in such a negative way that ultimately, should NOT be rewarded in the end. She wanted to kill Gwen, she did so. She won.

I... NO ONE should win in that scenario.

Feel free to disagree with me, but this plotline makes EVERYONE disagree with each other, let's be real.

Episode 16

I'm gonna say it, Duncan's outta here

He ALSO gets comeuppance for what he did.

Like, I'm gonna be real, I sympathize with him more than Courtney. I always have for some reason, in EVERY plotline these two have, NOT just this one. BUT I do acknowledge that Duncan is in the wrong, and needs to get consequences for it.

Plus... why must Duncan need the lionshare of development again?

Give other people a chance

With that, we have the MERGE

Now, for the gag and the gag alone, I'm gonna have Izzy be the one who returns

I mean, come on, make it a tradition.

Plus Izzy as a bride, that'd just be funny

ANYTHING is better than Blaineley

Owen gets booted the same way, there's no real reason to keep him around any longer

Episode 20,

This is a double elimination

I'm gonna boot both Izzy and Gwen

Reason for Izzy? Alejandro saw her as a threat, so HE sabotaged her into cheating accidentally, Izzy not doing it on her free will. (I mean, EVERYONE says Izzy'd beat Alejandro in Squid Game)

Reason for Gwen? Heather spites her, everyone deems her the 'new heather' or whatever. Alejandro takes advantage of that to pretend to sympathize with her, as Gwen knows she messed up. Though Gwen'd probably get on Cody's good side, and maybe Noah's, it'd still end up being a tie with Gwen and Izzy, and they both get the boot.

Some people say that Gwen would have been better written if she was evil. Like she purposefully kissed Duncan to spite Courtney, and was a completely heartless villain...

I disagree.

I actually think that would have been worse

Episode 21,

Like I said earlier, Alejandro and Noah are in a scheming alliance, but Noah is the lesser evil here and begins to sympathize with people like Cody, Heather, Gwen, and so he reveals (probably in some confessionals) that he's planning a sneak attack to turn on Alejandro and get him voted off...

But that backfires on him, and he gets eliminated.

Then the final four, it's all exactly the same

I don't want to change this at all, Sierra gets 4th, Cody gets 3rd, Alejandro and Heather are the finalist

HEATHER WINS

I wouldn't change this at all

Now, would I change Sierra's writing and have her simping over Cody less frequent and creepy, and have it be called out more? YES.

But other than that, yeah I like this final four

And there you have it, Total Drama World Tour MY WAY

What's your way? Let me know what you think, and what you disagree with

[novantinuum]

Interview with a Fic Writer

Tagged by @fordanoia, thank you so much! ;w;;

__

How many works do you have on AO3?

I have a total of 67 works posted on AO3. (Even more on my ancient FF.net account.)

Of these, 38 are for Steven Universe, 17 are for Gravity Falls, 8 are for Doctor Who, and 5 are for Trollhunters. (One of the Trollhunters fics and one of the Gravity Falls fics are the same story, though- it’s a crossover, ahah!)

Out of the bulk of them, most are one-shots.

What’s your total word count on AO3

271,227 words.

...damn, that’s pretty decent. Hot shit, Jen.

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Oh hey, the answer I already gave above! Yeah, I’ve only written for 4 fandoms in my entire life. I’ve actually written tons more Doctor Who than I’ve posted on AO3, but it’s older fic I wrote when I was 12-18, so... not exactly up to my current standards of writing. There’s a reason I haven’t cross-posted many of those.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1) Hollowed Moon (AKA the abandoned Spinel and Stevonnie one) with 2,709 kudos

2) Crack the Paragon, my long fic, with 1,398 kudos

3) Shattering Atlas with 627 kudos

4) Contact with 476 kudos

5) Bi the Way... with 279 kudos

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try my best to! I’ve made some friends before by responding back and forth in fic comments, so I always think it’s fun to engage with my readers in that way.

Fun fact: if you theorize or muse about lore in the comments of any of my fics, I will also muse about lore with you! I love discussing deep character/plot stuff, and sometimes even go in a bit deeper about my thought process while writing certain bits when people ask me about stuff.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Probably either Shattering Atlas (mentioned above) or The Price of Freedom, since they’re blatantly Hurt, No Comfort. Even the angstiest of most of my fics tend to suggest a light at the end of the tunnel, but those flat out END in a depressing manner, ahah. Fun to write, but... damn. You were sure goin’ through it then, huh Jen? Pat pat. XD

Do you write crossovers? If so, what’s the craziest thing you’ve ever written?

I have posted a single crossover- the start of a Gravity Falls/Trollhunters fusion sort of thing where teen Stanley ends up becoming the trollhunter, and meets Blinky and Arrrgghh. I got 4 chapters and about 15K in before I got sucked into Steven Universe hell, so I never continued it. Wrote a pretty bomb ass fight scene for it, though.

(I co-wrote one other crossover when I was a teen with some friends at a sleepover- it was the most Wild Dumb Bullshit ever, pretty much throwing Spiderman and Sherlock and Bilbo Baggins and the Doctor into a room together and locking the door. @yourstylishmom I know you know what I’m talking about, uhsndghjdj w h e e z e)

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not that I can recall. The only strange comments I’ve gotten have been like... people debating about Spinel in the comments thread of Hollowed Moon...? That was bizarre. More amusing than anything, though.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I mean, I HAVE written smut before. Your typical kinky bullshit. Have I posted it, though? No. Will I ever? No. It’s for my eyes, and my eyes only.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I did do a lot of Fiddauthor RP with @the-ill-doctor back in my Gravity Falls era! Those were some lovely times. ;w; <3 A portion of those RPs have been shared in a fic format, too--> The Time We Lost, the Time We Mended

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

I don’t exactly have ONE all-time favorite, but the only ones I’ve ever sat down and created genuine content for are the Doctor/Clara Oswald, Ford/Fiddleford, and Steven/Connie.

What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Hmmm. Second Skin. There’s only two more short chapters I need to write, but I kinda started writing that as a vent fic, and... I’m (thankfully) not in that mindset anymore.

What are your writing strengths?

I like to think that I write pretty decent character dialogue, and have a knack for capturing the voices of at least a few of ‘em. Some are definitely easier than others, though! Steven, Amethyst, and Greg tend to be the easiest for me when writing SU fic. And back in my Gravity Falls days, I found it easiest to write Ford and Stan.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I don’t know how to write fluff. I don’t understand romance. I technically understand the CONCEPT of it, but I have never myself experienced what I would consider true romantic attraction, so I have no clue what that experience feels like. I tried writing romance once in Ticklish, a teen Steven/Connie fic, but I to this day have no idea if this is what it’s actually LIKE. XD

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don’t really have any opinion on this, truth be told. I’ve never really run into this in the fic I read- but I’m guessing it shows up in plenty of anime fandoms.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Doctor Who! That was the first fandom I read a fic for, too. If we’re counting unpublished fic that we wrote before we understood the concept of fanfiction, though... then the game Blinx the Time Sweeper *wheeze*

What’s your favorite fic you’ve ever written?

1) Crack the Paragon. It’s certainly the longest, most recent fic I’ve worked on- and I like to think the character work I’ve dug into with that is pretty neat.

2) Contact. This is the first true finished multichapter SU fic I have, and I think it’s cool to finally look back on this project as a cohesive short story, and be proud of myself for seeing it to the end.

__

Tagging (if you’re super bored and would like a fun thing to do) fellow writers:

@mimik-u, @fanfoolishness, @infriga, @abel-quartz, @endae

[herstarburststories]

Merry... Birthday?

Pairing: Dean Winchester x reader

Summary: You love christmas, but Dean doesn’t. Yet, he might make an exception for your birthday this year.

A/N: This one goes for @negans-lucille-tblr​ ‘s secret fic exchange. My secret Santa was @katymacsupernatural​. Hey, honey! I hope you enjoy this and happy birthday! You deserve double presents, so here’s mine. All mistakes are mine!

Divider by @talesmaniac89 !

You loved Christmas.

It was probably a nostalgic longing for your long gone urban life. Just in the same way you’d still catch yourself looking through the news for election results or feel your stomach twist if you didn’t eat homemade food at least twice a week. You were dead to the government and certainly spent more on the road than in a home. Besides, you had met up with God enough times to know him. All the encounters and screaming and unapologetic abandonment should make you want to throw any baby Jesus against a wall or even climb on a Christmas tree just to shout about all the hoaxes so perfectly molded in patterns through our brains like braids.

Yet, something about you loved christmas. 

The pretty lights always shining, it didn’t matter where you go. For once, all the city-- everything would be entirely made of light. Their incandescent glow always companishing each person, either it was in an once treacherous alley or only to make the kids' grin bigger as they watched them among the busy streets with wide eyed gazes. The confusion in the kitchen that often ended up with huffs bursting into chuckles between the smell of meals that were too much and would make a room for leftovers for the rest of the week. How everything seemed to be made only of happiness, and nothing could ever cut through those water; all the knives were suddenly swords for kids to play and no white gun. In Christmas, a house became a kingdom for every heart. Everything was good and felt through the skin to the bone, like a single glimpse, a hidden day of what would be paradise.

That was how you were raised, at least. The Winchesters didn’t share the same mindset, no. While you grew up with decorating the tree, they were hiding bodies in the dim light. Leftovers were all through their whole year, and Christmas was described as good or not with one single criteria: snow streets. They had to take one? Annoying date. They didn’t and there was eggnog? Bearable Jesus’s birthday.

Yet, you attempted to make the bunker the more festive possible: buying a bunch of christmas lights, cookies’ ingredients and even a small nativity scene. Your attempts to enjoy the date’s niciities ended up with Sam breaking his arm after crashing on the ground because you insisted on him putting the lights in a place higher than his age, not to mention the burned cookies that looked more like tiny monsters than gingerbread men.

Your parents used to make this look so much easier.

Although the youngest Winchester understood a little more about the concept of holidays, a believer in the good until the very end, his brother didn’t share the idea. You couldn’t say you were surprised. Dean just had two barely normal christmas in his life: one when he was dying and one with Lisa and Ben. Both situations made it to his heart only to shatter from the inside.

‘’Baby Jesus?’’ Dean snorted, shaking his head at the sight of you adjusting the weird little dolls in the nativity. He placed another ruined cook in his mouth, speaking with his mouth full next: ‘’We have the son of Lucifer, guess that counts.’’

‘’Don’t say that once Jack gets home.’’ You rolled your eyes, turning to face the oldest Winchester with your hands on your hips. How could he eat that? You couldn’t even make it a bite and Sam only had half of those. ‘’And stop eating those. They are burned.’’

‘’I’ve had worse.’’ He remarked, adding another cookie to his mouth. You grimaced, wondering for a brief moment how your boyfriend could be simultaneously the guy who saved the world and a man with the taste of a five years old.

‘’Yeah. But I’m the one who has to hear you whining about your bellyache later.’’

‘’I don’t whine--’’ You arched your eyebrows at his statement, making Dean huff in agreement. ‘’That was once and because of Sam’s weird ass vegan bacon.’’

‘’You acted like you were dying.’’

‘’My tongue was!’’

‘’So get this.’’ Sam’s voice interrupted your childish argument, catching the attention of both hunters like a shiny object did to a cat. ‘’Apparently we got an earlier christmas gift.’’

‘’What is it?’’ You asked, approaching the table.

‘’Three teenagers disappeared in the forest, all personal objects left behind.’’ Sam explained as Dean scratched out his neck to glance at his brother’s computer screen. Nothing like a case in Colorado. ‘’The authorities think it’s a serial killer. But one of the girls, Kayla Wodson, said she saw a weird, skinny giant take her friends.’’

‘’Ho ho ho and three bodies.’’ Dean clapped his hands together with a wry curve of lips. ‘’Alright. Let’s hit the road-- Wait, wait, wait. Where do you think you are going?’’

You were standing beside Dean while Sam raised to his feet, ready to pack his bags. Dean, nonetheless, was quicker than his brother, soon putting himself in front of Sammy; hands protectively standing in front of the youngest’s chest to keep him from moving any further.

He shook his head with a scoff. ‘’Dude, come on.’’

‘’Not happening, Sammy. You got a broken arm.’’ You mumbled a sorry along Dean’s big brother speech, to which Sam replied with a comprehensive smile. ‘’Y/N and I take care of it.’’

‘’He’s right. Must be the first time in his life, but he is.’’ Dean turned his head, furrowing his eyebrows at you ‘’Don’t worry. It’s just a wendigo anyway. ‘’

‘’Okay. Just…’’

‘’Don’t forget the fireblazer. As if your brother would miss an opportunity to use it.’’ You scrunched up your noise, causing a chortle out of Sam while Dean commented something about grabbing the specific instrument and walked away. ‘’Maybe you could call Eileen. Ask her to help you to back some christmas cookies.’’

Sammy shook his head at your wiggling brows. ‘’That doesn’t sound as sexy for me as it does for you.’’

Dean Winchester was good with numbers.

Not the urban numerical sense of the deal, of course. He almost didn’t make it in sixth grade with useless geometry and all that, and he still used his fingers to count when he had to deal with an equation. No, his good and quick way with numbers was easier, intrinsic to his head.

How many years since mom died? Seventeen. How many people did he have to save? All of them. How many years had he left? Less than he once owned.

Hunter math was simpler, and was all he really needed since he was four years old, running from the fire with his baby brother in his arms-- which brought him to the second section of his particular geometry: birthdays and death anniversaries. Dean never, ever forgot any special date. Those were his own holidays, the only worth celebrating and remembering. His wishes, grief, and cherishment were reserved for the people he loved, not some celestial assholes who saw his life like a book.

Therefore, his mind went on a golden rush for your day as soon as the Wendigo hunt took more than you both expected. You wouldn't be able to make it home before your birthday, which would be ending shortly, a matter of two or three hours. His inner engineers were useful tonight, in his vision, useful enough to make those sappy movies jealous. While you were washing some guts and leaves away, Dean went to the nearest convenience store. His long arms nesting a bunch of stuff he never dared to touch in years. The cashier with drowsy eyes and escarlet Santa hat seemed bored with his shopping, probably because she saw an uncountable amount of people buying the same things over and over. He couldn’t blame her for the suburban exhaustion. If anything, it was a small comfort for his war orbs to see and be a part of a scene so mundane.

He hustled back to the dive motel room, singing in relief to himself once he stepped in and heard you singing Christmas Tree Farm while the water rushed in. He grimaced at himself for recognizing that Taylor Swift song. How couldn’t he? That woman was 80% of all you heard everyday. Man, he was whipped.

Tilting his head back in reality, he started organizing in clumsy manners of putting everything in place for you. His bruised hands touching so carefully the fragile ornaments to make the motel room with grubby walls and weird black stan on the floor that only seemed to grow a little more like you.

You, the woman who put up with him, who laughed at his stupid jokes, and who watched Scooby Doo, all snuggled up to him every friday. You, the woman who switched from AC/DC to Taylor Swift and then Eric Clapton. You, the one who understood his job and helped him to wash off some of the blood on his hand and never got scared of how red the water could get. You, the girl who rolled her eyes at his first attempt of flirting and now stole his french fries and kissed his lips as if he was worth being delicate with. You, his breathing, his true holiday, his only act of faith besides Sammy.

Dean pressed his teeth against his bottom lip, looking up and down his little manual work. Part of him said it was ridiculous, he surely would make a lot of fun of Sam if he did that to a chick. Yet, mostly he was proud. He wanted you to like it. It wasn’t even near to what you deserved, but it was a piece of it. It was what the Winchester could give you, and that would be hopefully, enough.

While Dean was caught in the crossroad of judging and admiring his surprise, you left the shower with a towel wrapped around your head and lips mumbling Cocaine. Your feet glued to the ground once you witnessed what was in front of you: the room was decorated with christmas lights, a tiny plastic tree on the table, right beside a pie with candle on the top and two cup of what smelled like hot cocoa.

‘’Dean…’’ Your tender tone brought him back from his traineck thoughts as he turned around to glance at you. You chortled in astonishment as he raised his eyes and said surprise! ‘’What’s this?’’

‘’Well, it’s your birthday.’’ He shrugged, scooting closer to you with a smirk. Dean smoothly wrapped his arms around your waist, yours instantly resting around his neck. ‘’In my defense, they just had christmas stuff. Blame your parents for having you close to Jesus’ special day.’’

‘’Christmas stuff include pie and not cake?’’ Your brows knitted together, a heartwarming smile on your lips as you watched his expression marked by multicolored little lights. He smelled like something was a blaze, and you knew that was for standing too close to the candle and not for burning a body this time. Small changes.

He scoffed humorously. ‘’You like pie better anyway.’’ He nodded at the carnival-like situation around you two. Dean Winchester wasn’t the kind of man who got insecure, but you could catch a perk of brand nervous hesitation as his green eyes shot you an anxious glance. ‘’Did you like it?’’

‘’I loved it.’’ You pulled cheeks dimpled with joy that was kissed by Dean’s own smiling lips. The kiss was so gentle, it was his own palpable light hearted emotion. You being happy in his arms. It had been so long since he felt he could be enough, he could make someone happy. But you were right there. As you pulled away, another short kiss was given between playful words: ‘’That’s what I call a christmas miracle.’’

‘’Shush.’’ He leaned in and pecked your lips. As Dean pulled back, he couldn’t help but watch around with the pride of Hubris. His glance went back to you, a lopsided grin on his face. God, you loved that smile. You loved that man. ‘’So I added some whiskey to the hot cocoa. We could drink some, eat the pie, and see if those lights make a good improvise rope. What do you tell me?’’

All you could do was kiss him again.

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[seokmingiggles]

ult. group question game.

tagged by: @merakiiverse​ and @lunatens​ (thank you both!!)

i tag @wonwooslibrary @sanshiine (gotta support our subunit agenda!) @aunty-tiger-potato @heartshxkr @brbkpop @woozisnoots @interludeshadow @adi--writes and anyone else who may be interested! (and i apologize in advance if any of you have already done this)

rule: answer the following questions based on your ult group(s).

my ult groups are seventeen and bts (thanks for doing two groups, luna, otherwise I wouldn’t have thought to do that lol).

1. who was your first bias

svt: soonyoung, jihoon, and minghao were my initial top three (however, seungcheol and seokmin were the first two who caught my eye visually-only, but they *spoiler* didn’t make my bias list until later on).

bts: jungkook was my first bias ever. i thought it was so cool how young he was to have achieved all that they have.

2. who is your bias now?

svt: uhh, now i have six biases that constantly rotate for the #1 position. in the order in which they were added to this new list: minghao, chan, joshua, seungcheol, seungkwan, and seokmin. (currently, i think seok has the top spot, but you didn’t hear it from me.)

bts: jung hoseok. that is all; thank you for coming to my ted talk. but no, hobi is my one and only ultimate bias out of all of the groups i listen to.

3. what is the first mv you watched by them?

svt: i think it was my my? i know, very recent. yes, i haven’t actually been listening to seventeen for very long; i became a carat because of the heng:garae album in 2020. the choreography version of the left & right mv specifically made me want to learn more about the group.

bts: technically, it was the mv for dope back in 2015 through a friend in high school. although, it took me four years after that to actively decide to listen to them on my own. i would consider fake love to be the first mv i watched once i decided to learn more about the group, despite the era having already passed.

4. what’s your favourite mv?

svt: fallin’ flower. hands down, without a question.

bts: it might just be lights. i think my default answer would have been blood sweat & tears (solely because that’s the only song on my mind, apparently), but no, i’m a soft stan at heart, and lights fulfills that (and taehyung blue hair).

5. if you could listen to one of their songs for the rest of your life, which would it be?

svt: habit. hands down, without a question. (that is my all-time favourite seventeen song; i have many other favourites, but this one is undoubtedly at the top of my list.)

bts: unlike seventeen, i do not have just one favourite song that outranks the rest. i have too many favourite bts songs, so this question is challenging. i think it has to depend on my mood. blue & grey, for instance, fulfills my love for slow, ballad-esque songs, but the mood that louder than bombs and cypher 4 emanate... need i say more?

6. who would you want to see them collab with?

svt: i don’t think i have a strong answer for this question as collabs aren’t something i normally think about. i do really enjoy the product of pink sweat$’s collab with seokmin and joshua, so maybe something similar to that?

bts: i think the boys’ relationship with halsey is absolutely adorable and wholesome, so i wouldn’t mind seeing that again. oh! or becky g. again too! i just adore how she and hoseok are so so supportive of each other.

7. what mv concept do you want to see them do?

svt: luna, you answered something similar to blood sweat & tears, and i agree with you x1000. yes, that expensive, artistic, but broodingly dark and sensual concept. ha... yeah, i’d like to see that.

bts: ... am i allowed to answer a blood sweat & tears pt 2 here? okay, but i’m SO sad that i missed out on orange-haired hoseok... and just the whole wings era in general.

8. have you ever had a dream with any of the members in it?

svt: yes, and if i’m being specific, the whole idea to begin my IWYMH fic (aka, the first story i posted to tumblr) was inspired by a dream i had. to be fair, a lot of it was sourced as i was writing it, but specifically, the whole parking lot scene with the dog was from a dream i had. i know that there was a different time where joshua was helping me with understanding something in korean. i remember, i was trying to figure out an honorific for “잘자요,” but for some reason, shua responded with “bon ici”??? although none of the translations made sense, i don’t think i’ll ever understand how i managed to dream in english, korean, and french that night.

bts: i know i’ve had dreams with bts members as well since my dreams tend to be very vivid, but nothing in particular comes to mind (and i rambled enough for that above answer anyways).

9. if you could spend the day with one member, who would it be, and what would you do?

svt: since i am biased as hell, hands down one of my six biases... but which one? uhh, that’ll probably depend on my mood that day. right now (since he’s been bias wrecking me the most lately) i’d probably say seokmin because he just makes me ~happy~. there’s nothing in particular that i’d want to do, just hang out, maybe grab some lunch, something low-key like that.

bts: hoseok. yeah, hoseok, please and thanks. and the same thing as above, just something low-maintenance would be my preferred thing to do.

10. which member do you think you would get on best with?

svt: i think temperament-wise, i am the most similar to a combination of minghao and jihoon, with a sprinkle of joshua in the mix. so, only logically will i choose chan. no, there’s no logic there, i just think because we’re the same age, he may enjoy being (technically, because of birth months) older than someone for once. (and i think our mbti types are, like, super, super compatible?)

bts: likewise, i think i have the most similar temperament as yoongi, so my answer is hoseok. no, i don’t accept constructive criticism here. thanks.

11. which member do you think you would argue with?

svt: i try to avoid conflict as best as possible, so technically none. however, i am the kind of person to playfully tease those who i feel comfortable around, so maybe seungkwan or jeonghan since they seem to be the same way.

bts: with the same reasoning as above, i think i’d bicker the most with seokjin or jimin. only playfully, of course, not for actual arguments.

12. if you had to choose one member to scroll through your tumblr, who would it be?

svt: oh dear, if i had to have one of them do this, maybe vernon, i guess? just because i take him as someone who wouldn’t have a strong opinion on it. the “to each their own” mindset is something that i think vernon has.

bts: this one pains me even more to think about. perhaps namjoon or taehyung for a similar reason as above?

[roxinnaxu]

The Witcher fic recs

Now that people are forced to stay home I thought ”hey, why not share some amazing fanfics for people to read”. Fanfiction is amazing, amazing thing and I love spreading knowledge of new fics and fics that people might have not read yet! Here we go!

(Note: most of these are centered around geraskier, as that’s a very common ship and I love their relationship, no matter if it’s platonic or romantic or whatever else. Most of these also include angst and hurt Jaskier, in some way or another. I will include content warnings)

CW: SUICIDAL THOUGHTS and SELF-HARM

in restless dreams i walked alone (the sound of silence) by august_embers

Chapters: 3/3

Fandom: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion Characters: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier | Dandelion, Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Depression, Mental Health Issues, Jaskier is not okay sometimes, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, No actual suicide attempt, Pre-Slash, Geralt is trying his best, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, major depressive disorder is a bitch and a half, Yennefer has her own definition of helpful Summary:

"Geralt is able to scent the guilt on a lying man from ten feet away, to catch sight of half a pawprint in the undergrowth in the dead of night, to know when to lean back before the coming blade can cut through his throat. Much of it comes from his training at Kaer Morhen, where his instincts were honed and enhanced, but even more comes from his travels and experiences while walking the Path. Geralt notices things, because not noticing means death.

He does not notice the lack of singing."

Something is very wrong with Jaskier.

Ok so I love love love this fic! It has suicidal Jaskier, which I am a fan of (mostly because that hurt/comfort and vent), and Geralt finding out and being terrified and comforting him, and Yennefer relating and being a good friend, thought maybe not in the best way.

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CW: SUICIDAL THOUGHTS, SELF-HARM and mentioned CAR ACCIDENT in the past

a tapestry of scars by @splendidlyimperfect​

Chapters: 3/3 Fandom: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Triss Merigold/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg Characters: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier | Dandelion, Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Triss Merigold, Roach (The Witcher) Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Meet-Cute, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Depression, Mental Health Issues, Bipolar Disorder, Self-Harm, Scars, scars from self injury, Reference to previous suicide attempt, Trauma, talk of previous car accident, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dogs, Roach is the best therapy dog, yes I'm projecting on Jaskier, but at least he gets all the puppy cuddles, and Geralt tries his best to be comforting, Geraskier Week Summary:

Jaskier comes into Geralt's life on a sunny afternoon in May - wide smiles and baby blue eyes; breathtaking stories and half-written song lyrics. He's mesmerizing and full of life, and Geralt can't look away. But sunshine doesn't last forever, and when Jaskier disappears, Geralt learns that beautiful things have dark and broken pieces, and even damaged people can help fix them.

I’m just going to put these suicidal Jaskier fics here. That trope is comforting, so bear with me. This one is a modern au, and it has fluff and comfort and found family! Yen and Jaskier are friends and Triss too and I love it! Geralt is a bit clueless but nonetheless comforting and reassuring and worried. And Roach is a three-legged therapy dog!

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CW: vague SUICIDAL MINDSET

Bones by @runninghaunted​

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: The Witcher (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion Characters: Roach (The Witcher), Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier | Dandelion Additional Tags: No monsters have been harmed in the making of this fic, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, headcanons about witchers, timeframe? Never heard of her, Post Season 1, Geralt doesn‘t do feelings dammit, spoiler: he does them anyway, Jaskier you are a dramatic idiot, we stan this boy, if roach could talk there wouldn‘t be any problems at all, systematic butchering of tags and language Series: Part 1 of Kindred Summary:

Jaskier knows that Geralt will probably end up killing him eventually.

I love this fic series! I don’t want to spoil anything but Jaskier is not what he seems and also has a lot of issues, most of which he ignores completely. Also Geralt does not know what to do.

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CW: POISON and implied, non-graphic TORTURE

Sometimes a Hammer, Sometimes a Lockpick by @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels​

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Humor, BAMF Jaskier | Dandelion, Jaskier | Dandelion Being a Feral Bastard, Casually Poisoning an Entire Castle, As you do, Hurt Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Soft Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Soft Jaskier | Dandelion, Vague Hints To Jaskier Being Elvish, Whoever Said 'You Can't Just Waltz in Here' Never Met Jaskier Summary:

Geralt's been in a dungeon for two weeks and is understandably frustrated. Jaskier, on the other hand, is what one might call... livid.

THIS is the feral bard Jaskier content that I’m craving. He’s sneaky and competent and determined and also almost poisons the whole castle. Also has that good good Geralt angst.

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CW: TORTURE and MIND GAMES

To Sleep Perchance To by sospes

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion Characters: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier | Dandelion, Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon Additional Tags: Torture, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Jaskier | Dandelion Whump, Hurt/Comfort, Mind Games, Magical Fuckery Summary:

Jaskier gets kidnapped and tortured. Geralt comes to rescue him.

Except it's not quite that simple.

Ohh boy this is the Hurt Jaskier Fic. He is tortured in a way where Geralt comes to rescue him or hurt him over and over and over again, and it focuses mostly on that (it has a bit of an open ending and only the start of recovery, so if you are looking for a recovery fic, this is maybe not for you. If you are looking for Jaskier whump and worried Geralt and caring Yennefer? This is absolutely for you)

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CW: almost DROWNING

Shining by @nemainofthewater

Chapters: 37/37 Fandom: The Witcher (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, very much in the background - Relationship, Jaskier & Borch, Jaskier & Saesenthessis Characters: Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Roach (The Witcher), Borch Three Jackdaws | Villentretenmerth, Saesenthessis, Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon, Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Vea (The Witcher) Additional Tags: Don't copy to another site, Angst, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, dragon!Jaskier, he doesn't know about it though, Introspection, Episode 1x06: Rare Species, jaskier is forcibly adopted, Swearing, Emotions, cute baby dragons, Telepathy, Fluff, Family, Cuddling, Transformation, there will be a happy ending I promise, no grimdark fantasy here, Found Family, several instances of, Kidnapping, all of the same person, there is angst here not going to lie but all will work out in the end Series: Part 1 of dragon!Jaskier Summary:

Things that Jaskier can remember about his family: -His mother stroking his hair, the soft murmur of her voice as he settled more comfortably against her. There was firelight and warmth and love. -A brief moment of triumph and then the feeling of weightlessness as his father lifts him from the tree and cradles him to his chest. The steady rhythm of his heart in his breast. -Reaching up to the sky. He’s not sure what for. Possibly for his parents, though he knows that they are gone, that they have left him, that they are never coming back. -His grandfather’s stern visage. The knowledge that he doesn’t want him. That no one wants him. Being sent to temple school is honestly a relief.

Jaskier is (unknowingly) a dragon and is (forcibly) adopted by Borch, post Rare Species.

Ok so this is just the best non-human Jaskier fic! Jaskier is a gold dragon and has a family and also everyone is constantly kidnapping him! (It does have angst and hurt/comfort and it’s so beautiful!) If you are looking for a multi-chapter fic with an amazing plot, you are in the right place

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CW: RAPE

The Public Perception of the Barding Profession by sospes

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg Characters: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier | Dandelion, Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Jaskier | Dandelion Whump, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia is Bad at Feelings, Sexual Assault, Rape, Idiots in Love, Angst Summary:

“I’m a bard, Geralt,” Jaskier says, like that explains everything. “To a lot of people, there’s a very fine line between a musician and a whore. A line that’s so fine that, in fact, it doesn’t really exist."

Geralt learns that Jaskier's life can be just as painful as his, sometimes.

This has very, very good hurt/comfort centered around the fact that Jaskier, as a bard, is used to people having sex with him, no matter if he wants it or not. I love the protective Geralt, hurt/comfort and angst with it, but be mindful of the themes and warnings!

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That’s it for now! I might continue this rec list at some point, but right now I can’t think of anything else. Feel free to put your faves in, though! And remember to leave kudos and comments!

[akaeijis]

my wips that i am pushing myself to work on during these times! 

the sea and mountain belong to you; kl alternate timeline voltron fix-it ISH with religious undertones. slightly inspired by drowning knife (theme wise).  

excerpt:  “This ocean and these mountains!” Lance shouts and he feels reminiscent of the time they were on a foreign planet, young and blind, falling straight into curses, walking the line between humans and gods, “all belong to Keith!”

i really want to finish this but ? who knows... i was working on it w stacey (esbis) but i’m not sure the direction i’m going with it TT but i love the concept

Keith’s WikiHow Guide: How to Know if a Boy Likes You; vld kl romcom in keith’s perspective! i just really love romcoms and i think humor is rly funny and its really good lol i reread and i was like?? damn

excerpt: Keith doesn’t, in fact, ‘move on’. He goes to the bathroom. Look up on google: how to know if a guy likes you. Like yeah, they’re only on the second episode, but his heart is beating louder than the screen and his face is so hot it could probably cook at least two eggs. 

how i missed you; vld keith-pov garrison to present day timeline. about how keith ‘missed / messed up’ his chance with lance? sort of. about how they loved each other but coulsn’t due to the war

excerpt: Four seasons pass, the stars are still constant, and he meets blue eyes again, that glare at him and says, “the name’s Lance,” he forgets about the phantom that haunts his original days of the Garrison. 

it’s sort of like a Dual Perspective on let me melt but with a different timeline

i think this one is fun to finish because keith is usually easier to write during romcoms because he’s so direct and to the point and hilarious and it’s easier for me to explore lance’s mindset since i feel like i understand lance. so this one is a challenge yet still something i want to explore

midday, morning, night: ANOTHER vld keith romcom. basically keith is whipped and its funny

excerpt: “Did someone say infomercials?” Keith comes out, rubbing a towel over his head. In Pidge’s peripheral vision, she can see Lance flailing around like an octopus and various of facial expressions that vaguely remind Pidge of the lion in Madagascar. 

i wrote this a while ago and i still wanna finish it TT why do i have so many vld fics PRES2

stays where he can see the sun: vld fix-it lance centric where lance leaves voltron

excerpt: The more time he spends on Earth the more he questions why he ever left. He becomes a bit daring with his adventures, sneaking out into town squares where the people are lively with music and soft lights and bustling laughter and begins flirting with pretty girls and boys again. 

this one is lance pov and near and dear to my heart since i get to go back and explore his head and how much i miss him! it explores a lot about the holt family dynamics, etc. 

me tangere: vld soulmate kimi no nawa amnesia ish fic

excerpt:  “Look at me,” rough hands barely whisper across his face and are snatched away in a second. “Don’t you dare forget about me,” someone whispers in his dreams. He can’t place the voice, could be a figment of his imagination, a stranger on the street, or even his own. “Because I’m going to find you.”

timeline where the gang’s memory is wiped after helping in space, but the body doesn’t forget so they’re trying to 

I WANT TO FINISH THIS SO BAD OMG

Junhoe is #Whipped; ikon junhwan fic(s) there’s multiple fics in this doc: chanwoo’s 3rd person view of junhwan, stan twitter au haha, and just some introspective jinhwan, there’s also a teacher AND convenience store au i wrotehaha

excerpt:  Which is how they both found each other in coats and heavy scarves and face masks. They make their way to ‘their’ spot that they go out to when they feel like it. They started going there when Junhoe just wanted everything to stop, fuck, he was only fifteen and they were against the world. Jinhwan didn’t know what else to do so they went to the river and watched the stars and yell or cry or whatever they needed to do.

i think it will just be fun to do! 

more than i am; spamano sort of cmbyn atmosphere inspired antonio is a charismatic traveler and lovino is looking for adventure but a lot of soulmate gothic kind of content

excerpt:  “You’re me, we have the same feelings, same wants. But you’re just more. Everything I am, but more.” Lovino brushes his hands through Antonio’s hair. “I feel like you’re more me than myself.”

idk i just wanted to write soulmate almost dangerous dependency 

in another life time, i was there; spamano nation verse with lovino and antonio exploring what it means to be nations as well as their history of being together and marriage 

excerpt: But in the same note, to repeat myself. He is spending more time in between trips, he is tired, he is carrying the world on his back - I cannot help but see Father’s eyes in his. Today, the setting sun reflected such a bright orange similar to burning cinders.

i want to finish this very dearly! its sort of based on my time in Spain so and its really well written ;-;

[supposed2bfunny]

B,L,A,N,K,E,T for the fanfic ask meme

OMG LISSY THANK YOU SO MUCH?? You indulge me FAR too much

B-What was the first fandom you read fic in?  Which was the first you wrote fic for?

I first read for either Hana-Kimi or Ouran High School Host Club back in the golden days of Fanfiction.net...many moons ago...

I first wrote even before then for Teen Titans. I didn’t know “fanfiction” was a thing, and I just wrote “stories” for my favorite superheroes by hand and illustrated them myself, to be enjoyed by absolutely nobody but me.

L- Which of your fanfics was the most emotionally challenging to write?

That’s tough. Probably either “Unacceptable” or “Inarticulate Life,” both of which deal with some heavier subject matter. “OT3″ has also had some darker moments, which can be tough to write sometimes without taking lots of breaks to gather my thoughts and emotions before getting to a final version. It’s not that I can’t write about tougher topics, but rather that I want to make sure the characters speak like themselves while also being respectful of the subject matter (i.e. abusive relationships, sexual misconduct, etc). It can be challenging to strike a balance between handling something in a way that I’m comfortable sharing with readers while also just being in-character.

A-Of the fanfic you’ve written, which is your favorite and why?

If we’re sticking to what I’ve written more recently on AO3, probably “OT3″ or “Naked,” as they both kind of served as icebreakers for me to meet and befriend a lot of awesome people in the Gorillaz fandom, some of whom have become my closest friends over the course of years. The research and time and effort that has gone into OT3 (and will continue to; it’s on hiatus, but I’m not done with it forever) is probably the most I’ve ever poured into anything fandom-wise.

Looking back even further (if you don’t have my ff.net account, you’re not gonna get it; shit back there is CRINGE), I’m pretty fond of “Post Hoc, Ergo Propter Hoc,” because I wrote a lot of that at a time when I was starting to come into myself as a writer and realize that I wanted to take writing seriously as a profession. Plus I’ll always have a soft spot for Sherlock Holmes sooo

N-Any fic ideas brewing that you’d care to share?

I DON’T CARE if no one gives a shit, I’m drafting a JJBA/Vento Aureo Fumis fic that’s gonna be so traumatizing, yo! Mista is dealing with a shit-ton of survivor’s guilt and depression, and Fugo is just an emotional mess on a good day, and they’re gonna be thrown together to topple Passione’s narcotics trade. They’re falling in love, but why the hell aren’t they in therapy? Stay tuned to find out!

Also when that fic has been drafted, I’m seriously hoping to get back into writing “OT3″ again... It’s honestly harder than it sounds to write something when your heart’s not in it, but I’m going to do my best to get back into that mindset once my current hyper-fixation dies down a bit because I know a lot of folks really want to see the story continue (trust me: so do I).

K-Do you have a guilty pleasures in fic (reading or writing)?

Smut. I just read so much smut :( I generally don’t read fics that aren’t M-rated unless they’re exceptionally well-written. The kinkier the better, honestly. I’ve gotta get better about giving other fics a chance...

E- What character do you identify with most?  Is there a certain fic of yours that captures these qualities particularly well?

Hmm. Weird answer, but here goes: Mac from Sunny in Philadelphia is one. His toxic relationship with Dennis helped me externalize a bad relationship in my own life, and I really identify with Mac’s need to “protect” and love his friends even when he’s a total coward who hasn’t really sorted his own shit out yet, and even though he knows those friends wouldn’t necessarily do the same for him. I’m not sure that comes across so well in the sole IASIP fic that I’ve written, but I have drafts floating around for a longer fic I doubt I’ll ever get to that really address that aspect of his personality.

My current hyperfixation, JJBA also has me loving Mista, who is similarly, consciously or unconsciously, overly protective of loved ones to the point of self-destruction. That will absolutely shine through in the fics I’m writing for JJBA.

And my Good Omens fic “Upon Your Shoulders” may as well be titled “Beck Projects Intense Self-Loathing onto Aziraphale and Posts it Publicly.” So yeah. That’s really me not even trying to be subtle, to be honest. Aziraphale is just a character that I saw and instantly stanned.

I know I write primarily Gorillaz, but I don’t actually identify with any of them that closely? I just think they’re neat!

T-Any fanfic tropes you can’t stand?

Anything that uses trauma as the sole means to push two characters together is honestly just :/// like “Character A was sexually assaulted, and their trauma made Character B realize it was time to confess their feelings and now they’re happily together! :)” YUCK. Do not like.

I also generally avoid kidfics (with exceptions--lookin’ at you, Smooty!) because I don’t want kids nor do I want my OTPs to share their time/attention with anyone else, thank you! Unless I personally know and like the author, I skip over anything dealing with kids, adoption, pregnancy, etc.

Anything OC-related is also a no from me, dawg (with exceptions--lookin’ at you, Aaron!) because in case you couldn’t tell, I am there for the OTP I’m hyper-focused on, and don't need any distractions. My unpopular opinion is “why insert an OC when you can just self-project onto a character instead?”

Aside from that, give me all the “there was only one bed :O” or merfolk!AUs or time period!AUs you can--I’ll collect them all gladly.

Thank you so much for the ask, Liss!! This was fun AND you made me open my FF.net page to look at my old stuff. Thanks, I hate it!

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

no dont apologise! i didnt check until just then so np :)

mmm yeah it is a bit trippy. hehe ITS TRUE THO. yeah sadly i think ur right, and tag blocking is probably a good idea. sometimes smut written well or not in excess is okay but goddamn when its abt 01 line and thats the whole fic... *silently blocks tags*

hehe i do that all the time lol this conversation is carrying on threads from a month ago :) mmm yeah ur probably right sadly, same. HA HE DIDNT HAVE A CHOICE and now i have someone to talk to abt them, so thats good! I KNOW felix was actually the one who got me into skz with his iconique gods menu line so i guess i have a soft spot for him. i always tell myself my bias is chan but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ guess im more whipped than id like to admit. mmm yeah that does make sense dw i hope they do that as well. YES king seungmin hIMSELF. GODDAMNIT DONT GET ME STARTED ON MINHO IN GODS MENU I DIDNT EVEN KNOW HE WAS PART OF THE GROUP UNTIL I STARTED GETTING MORE INTO THEM. BITCH (affectionate) THE LINE DISTRIBUTION HAS BEEN UTTER DOG SHIT but *deep breath* its better now so were moving on adn hoping it stays that way. sis same but i may or may not have gone thru a rlly depressed phase and actively sought out the elimination episodes so i could actually force some tears out of my emotionless shell of a heart but what cna you do? lmaoo i feel that irl, binnie deserves more vocal lines. yesss channies accent is rlly prominent then, i think also the way he structures his phrasing? is more english speaking than korean? but yeah i totally get what ur saying. AJKSAL lmao

okay then! im excited for whenever it gets done! (maybe tag me?) ahh the cold shrivelled heart of a dark au writer beats again at the thought of torturing another poor characters very soul (/j) :(( yeah that would suck not being able to see them. ohhh ur on the other hemisphere to me! were just going into spring rn. mmm smth to look forward to! YES you put it into words. they rlly are pretty independent from the company (remember how jyp rejected that other dudes songs after like 3 seconds and then how he was apparently nervous to show the song hed written to chan cos chan was so good at writing hits ahhh sweet revenge) mmmYES we rlly need a mute and remove notifications button for our brains dont we?

YES CORRECT i totally agree. some people jsut dont give it a try, adn assume its bad cos its korean smh racist assholes. yes! im coming up to my 6 month anniv actually! sis sAME, i feel like theyre being tugged into appealing to the western american market and theyre not staying as true to their artistic flair as a group, especially with only writing english songs atm. *sigh* ah well, at least theyre bringing recognition to the kpop world. AHUH dead on, theyre going to be discarded pretty soon and then where will bp be? theyll prob go solo paths which is rlly sad but what can you do when the company is run by a prideful asshole? yg is not going to last much longer in the big four if they keep this up.

hehe you get it. oooh very cool! whos ur ult? (sorry if youve said this before) mmmm yeah good decision, i feel liek thats probably a wise decision. this is my first album release as a kpop stan (not counting mixtape oh) so i think ill get it for sentiments sake. yeah! im excited for the new music! mingi was the one who got me into them, but atm my bias is seonghwa followed by san, wooyoung and ateez but jonghos high notes man *swoon* he, yeah atm ive got jake, jay, nikki, jungwon and sunoo down so just trying to get the rest :) heh, yeah kard i rlly only got into cos of bm, ive seen him like interacting with a lot of idols and he seemed nice so i decided to check out the group. ikr gunshot man *another swoon*

no noe! i didnt know what it was until i got it lol. thx toffee ill try and take that to mind :) yeah lol im on a waiting list thats not going to be free until late september so hopefully i can hold on until then. hope ur okay, that sounds like it sucks, hope you can find someone. maybe ill just take you along on my phone and the therapist can get a two for one patient deal lmaooo. mmm, sorry no i havent mentioned it before, i dont rlly talk abt it much. uhhh basically hypermobility? if you google it, it doesnt seem bad, jsut joint flexibility but ive got the severe end of the stick, leaning towards ehlers danlos syndrome so thats fun. basically it just makes it hard for me to exercise, run, jump, stand or just walk for long periods of time and gives me a lot of joint and muscle pain so... thats fun! but obviously so many other people have it worse than me, so i try not to complain. normally in young people it will improve as they get older, but my doctor said bc its severe in me, its unlikely to get much better. but again, i dont have the worst lot in the bunch, so its all g.

oh its good that its not the bad type of rain, a light sprinkling can be relaxing sometimes. aww thx darl, the concern is appreciated but it went pretty well and i managed not to cough too much on stage or kill myself trying to run around to the other side of the stage in the pouring rain so thats good! oooh tea buddies! my dogs a labradoodle, but shes a bit more of a feral poodle lol not much labrador in her at all, unless its her relentless urge to hunt down every bird that has ever walked this earth smh :((( hopefully they can come back on soon, does uni have dances?

ahhh a mood if i ever heard one. hopefully things will get better for you soon, ik anxiety sucks ass. ooh thats always good! when its sunny here, its always melt ur thongs to the pavement hot so the nicely cool sunny days are a lovely change. hehe impatience is not so good for you, but good for us that get to see ur beautiful theme early. ahh no worries, itll come eventually hopefully. and if not, then just things that make you not anxious are good. it doesnt have to be black or white, sometimes gray is good. mmmmm sames i have midterms this week to catch up on and then two weeks of end of terms so thats fun! i hope u can overcome that a little, heres some channie to be ur motivation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8LWyNjzOww. hah! i hear that all the time, he seems to be everywhere. did you see that tiktok of hans slowed back door rap, i stg it sounded EXACTLY like namjoon, it kinda scared me. also teh beginning of another day, sounds so much like joon i swear.

that reminds me! idk ur biases! i feel like this should be smth i should know so please! feel free to elaborate!

ahh im glad, i was worried it is. mmm same, so no hard feelings if either of us misses a day or smth. ill start worrying if weeks/months have gone by, but if its just a little while thats more than fine. ill just picture you studiously completing notes and i wont worry lol

<3 w.a. 🐺

at some point i really think i'm going to start blocking accounts because blocking tags won't be enough. i saw ask tags the other day and it just made me want to bleach my eyeballs.

i could talk about god's menu felix for hours man. the teaser for god's menu that featured his part on the bridge made me look forward to the mv release. you: biases chan, also you: lixiesbabyhands. yes you are more whipped than you think. i can't believe orange haired minho was given NOTHING during that era but they kind of made up for it in the b-sides. i also hope it stays that way. the distribution for this era was pretty fair.

"torturing another poor character's soul" in all honesty, i used to live for this. 2017 me leading up to early 2020 wrote nothing but angst. i have another aussie friend on twt and tbh i'm still really (O.o) about the seasons! jyp should be terrified skz could easily take over that company. heck if skz grow old and start their own company, they'd probably do a great job at running it. PLEASE. i have issues on muting/notifications both mentally and in real life. sometimes, i just wish to disappear.

some people in my country are just disgusting tbh. not only racist but homophobic too. they label kpop as 'gay' and it DISGUSTS me. it's a problematic behavior/mindset people in my country need to fucking get rid of. anyway, HELP ME 6 MONTHS??? and i've been in this shit for like a decade eye. tbh, i’m not fond of kpop groups trying to appeal to the western audience :// it feels like they’re losing their identity in a way. yes recognition but at what cost? yg has my favorite groups but that’s one shitty company when it comes to promoting.

okay my ult! it’s haechan from nct but i consider chan an ult too. like a close second above my whopping list of kpop boys. oh yes! you should get the album just for like a keepsake? remembrance? how did mingi appeal to you? omg did you start getting interested in ateez back when he was still on hiatus? NOT YOU BIASING THE SAME PEOPLE I DID WHEN I FIRST STARTED STANNING. the infamous ateez thot-line. jongho is easily one of the best fourth gen vocalists out here, no one can change my mind :( good luck with memorizing the rest of enhypen! just in time for the comeback too. i hope i’ll get into kard soon but i’m pretty content (and a tad bit overwhelmed) with the amount of groups i stan right now.

please hold on though, feel free to vent here if you like. thanks for the offer tho HAHA but like i’ll try to get checked here too when the cases die down a bit. i’m sorry to hear about your condition though :( please don’t ever overwork yourself to the point that your joints/muscles would ache. it’s completely valid to complain about it tho. i get that you have others in mind but keeping that mindset really doesn’t do you (like you internally) any better? so if you need to, vent your frustrations out and don’t keep it in.

oh my god, about your performance last sunday. was the stage out in the open? glad you didn’t cough too much and did well on your concert. i’m proud of you! i can never understand dogs and poor birds T_T uni doesn’t have dances unfortunately. i think there’s just one party at the end like a graduation ball. what year are you in anyway? if it’s something that you’re fine with sharing. if not, it’s cool.

good luck with your exams! and thanks for the link! AHA what a cutie. i think he does this motivation thing once in a while during his lives and it’s just comforting. yeah joon and han my irl just freaked when we made that discovery. ult crumbs for her. oh god not me forgetting about every biases when you asked. you can ask for my biases in a few groups just list down the one’s you’re interested in knowing. 

i missed yesterday because i was grinding and finishing what if we stay + school work. finally did it today. i’m sure i’ll reply in like a day or two, definitely not a month unless i state otherwise. if i ever decide to abandon this blog, i’ll let you know.

[terresdebrume]

So I finally finished rewatching Thor (my laptop doesn’t like playing a movie after a day’s work) and tbh it’s interesting to think of how my interpretation of Loki’s situation has gone over the years.

When I first saw that movie, honestly, I was not only 100 % on Loki’s side, it was simply impossible for me to like Thor, or Odin, or basically anyone else in the movie no matter how badass they were (sorry, Sif). I was in a pretty bad place that winter and Loki’s emotional position struck me as so deeply relatable it hurts...which kind of showed, since I wrote 80 fics featuring (and, often, starring) Loki out of, at the time, something like 115 stories1.

After a while and some navigating through the Thor vs Loki fans/stans wars on Tumblr, it kind of evolved into thinking that yes, Loki’s feelings of hurt and betrayal were real, but since his family loved him he should just work on his own insecurities and get over it, so to speak. The part where Loki was a Frost Giant and how that put Odin’s actions in a different light (whether you assume Odin’s reactions to Loki were 100 % conscious or not) was...pushed aside, sort of. I think it was in part because you can hardly reconcile ‘Loki, this is on you, get over it’ and ‘maybe your parents didn’t really treat you as you needed and maybe it’s in part due to your species and their racism’.

The funny bit is, how I view Loki’s situation seems to be tied to how I interpret my own, actually. Back in 2011, I was very angry toward my family and half convinced they didn’t love me (fun times, in case you were wondering). By 2012, when Avengers came out, I’d fantasized so much about Loki coming back and getting the apologies he needed (from his parents, from his brother, from basically anyone in his life) listening to Thor’s jokes about how Loki was adopted physically hurt. I can’t say that raised the character in my esteem, but at the same time, looking back on it...well, it’s kind of a realistic continuation of Thor. I mean, by the end of that movie no one seems to question Odin’s decisions, no one seems to consider maybe there were things that led to this state of affair in the family besides Loki’s own character/judgment flaws.

At the time, if I recall correctly, that kind of felt like a slap to the face. It didn’t entirely prevent me from enjoying the movie, but I still couldn’t help but feel it was one more way to remind me the public that I Loki was making it all up and needed to shut up because my his family loved me him and therefore not being satisfied with that was, in essence, a character flaw.

In The Dark World, Loki gets punished for what he did in Thor and The Avengers which, lbr he deserves (though full disclosure, I subscribe to the manipulation and psychological abuse at the hand of Thanos theory, so I’m less on board for punishing him for that2). Once again though, there is no questioning of other people’s behavior around him. Frigga basically tells him he’s too self-centered/a bit of a hypocrite, people who supposedly mourned for him3 line up to issue death threats...once again, it’s all on him and his core flaw of not being happy with what makes other people happy. And once again, I thought maybe Loki ought to just get over himself and be happy with things as they were. 2013 was a bit of a better year for me4 so in a sense, it was easier to think that maybe, if I just got it through my head that my family loved me, I’d finally be happy and feel content with myself...which in turn made it easier to accept, again, that Loki was probably just a lost cause and should get over himself.

And then came Ragnarok.

I haven’t really made it a secret that I was disappointed by it, in significant parts because the humor trend of ‘let’s ridicule our character’ was taken way further than what I expected from this franchise and strayed waaaay away from the tone of the previous two movies5. But with a little more time to think about it, I think anther significant part of my disappointment with this move is that, once again, I didn’t get the emotional conclusion I was hoping for. I’m no longer in the same emotional state as I was in 2011, but I’ve also let go of the ‘you should get over it’ mindset, both for myself and for Loki. I’ve said it before but it bears repeating: how I view Loki’s situation is heavily influenced by how I process mine and vice-versa. The result of that is, as I allowed myself to feel hurt/wronged by the way my family acted around me again, it kind of allowed me to start wishing for...idk, balance? A satisfying end to my emotional arc? And to wish the same thing for Loki.

Thor: Ragnarok was...a painful, but probably realistic reminder that this will probably never happen. Beyond the fact that both Frigga and Odin are now dead and are therefore incapable of evolving in any capacity, I highly doubt Thor is ever going to wake up and realize what it’s like to be in Loki’s shoes, which would be a requirement for him to realize what kind of apology Loki needs to hear and why. Similarly, I highly doubt my family is ever going to wake up and apologize for the way they reacted to how they and I were different and how much that hurt, sometimes.

The common point here is Thor, like my fam, did nothing wrong by the social standards he’s accustomed to. I doubt Asgard sees dismissing un-warrior-like behavior as wrong, I doubt they see asserting your alpha male authority by telling others to shut up as wrong, and I doubt they see the constant mocking and belittling of Frost Giants as wrong...so for Thor to admit doing these things are wrong and hurtful would require him to admit not only that he has been hurting someone he cares about by accident but also that the entire moral landscape he (and his country) based his worldview on is flawed, which is complicated and painful and which Thor hasn’t shown any sign of doing so far, and neither has my family6

From there, the logical conclusion is that the moment of emotional justice I crave for both myself and Loki will most likely never happen. I don’t think there’s ever going to be a moment when Thor looks Loki in the eyes and says ‘I didn’t mean to, but I hurt you anyway, I get how, I’m sorry, and I’m not gonna do it again’. I don’t know how they’ll deal with that in the movies, if they’ll keep this craving as part of Loki’s characterization or if they’ll eventually reach a point where Loki is just a-okay with his situation even without the emotional closure7 but either way, it’s not going to happen for Loki, and it’s probably not going to happen to me either and that is...something I have trouble mourning, I guess. Which, well. There’s always fics, and things I could write myself, but it’s not exactly the same thing, is it?

I’m doing a rough estimate of my cumulated AO3+FFN count of the time here. Might get it wrong.

Also for what it’s worth I think it’s super fucked up (though utterly unsurprising) how the entire franchise dropped Loki’s frost-giant-ness and how that probably influenced the way Odin (and, consequently, everyone else) treated him, not to mention the hot mess that is his decision to exterminate all Frost Giants only after he discovers he is one.

Not very long if we got by the ending of Thor but, you know. Let’s pretend they did. (Also I acknowledge that, post Thor, they have rock solid reason to assume he’d be capable of attempting murder on Thor and to distrust him in general. I guess I just feel like they mourned their supposed friendship with him really fast).

Shoutout to my tumblr friends and to the awesome Winnie for helping me through so much bullshit.

The most frustrating part of that is that there are many things to like in this movie, from the criticism of Asgard’s imperialism and the whole ‘benevolent conqueror’ narrative that’s been the baseline from Thor and was criticized even then, to the fact that Ragnarok!Loki is probably the closest we’ve seen to the real Loki (given that it’s the first movie where he didn’t start out in the middle of an emotional crisis). Unfortunately for me, the way they were conveyed didn’t jam with my hopes/expectations for the movie.

I never pretended this wasn’t a personal post ^^’

To be honest, what I’ve heard about Loki in Infinity Wars so far kind of makes me fear a relapse, but I’m hoping they’re just planting red herrings. Hopefully.

[hardbreadhylia]

Sleepover- Older! Dipper x Older! Reader

This is my first fic ever, so please give some feedback and bear with me if it's not that great!! . Y/n - your name H/c - hair colour F/c - hair colour Y/n/n - your nickname . . . . You live in the picturesque town of Gravity Falls with your aunt, on a gap year for university. Due to it being such a small town, it's not long before you become great friends with basically the only other two kids that are your age (minus Pacifica, Grenda and Candy), aged 17. You've heard countless stories about weirdmageddon and so forth, and are very good friends of the twins as well as Stan and Ford. After a hard day of work at the mystery shack, conning innocent tourists into emptying their wallets, you say goodbye to Mabel and Dipper, suddenly exhausted from the day, happily taking out the tight ponytail your h/c hair has been stuffed into all day. Just as you leave the door of the shack, Mabel calls, "Hey, y/n! Wanna come over for a sleepover tonight?" You reply, "Yeah, sure. Nothing better to do." And wave her off. You're secretly buzzing for tonight, as over the past few months you've grown feelings for her male twin, Dipper. You're far too shy to ask him if he feels the same way though, and unfortunately Mabel's clocked onto your crush on him, so as usual she tries very hard to play match maker. It's evening and you've finished packing for the sleepover tonight- a baggy plaid pajama set with overnight toiletries etc. Just as you turn to leave, a hyper Mabel crashes into your f/c themed bedroom, out of breath. "y/n. I HAVE JUST HAD THE BEST IDEA!" You inwardly groan. What has she come up with this time? "Find the nicest damn underwear you can find, and you're packing that. With maybe a big t shirt or something?" Her smile widens evilly. You, on the other hand, are shocked. "No way. Why would I wear that?? What if Grunkle Stan and Ford see me?? Worse, what if Dipper sees me?" You anxiously run your hand through your h/c hair. "Chill out, y/n. Grunkle Stan and Ford are out on a fishing trip." And, she adds with an evil smirk, "I'm counting on Dipper seeing you wearing that." Which makes your face turn bright red. But hey, what if it works? What if then, finally, Dipper might see you as more than just his sister's friend? Maybe its worth a try. You give in and agree to the stupid shenanigans that Mabel always thinks of, and you're terrified of what tonight might bring. A few hours later, after Mabel left you once again, you head back to the mystery shack with Mabel's plan in your head. Immediately greeted by Dipper, he looks down and smiles behind is fluffy brown fringe, with a light pink dusting his cheeks, which you misinterpret as just being polite. After watching a few scary movies with Mabel clinging to you for dear life (and Dipper hiding upstairs somewhere, probably reading his journal), you decide to say goodnight to him, still not changed into your suggestive pajamas much to Mabel's dismay. As you guessed, he was still reading, and the dim light from his desk lamp accentuated his sharp jawline and chiseled cheekbones in the darkness. You'd seen photos of him when he'd first arrived at the shack all those years ago, and while he still has that eternally cute smile with the dimples and warm chestnut eyes, he's changed so much. I guess that's what happens when a dream demon tries to destroy you and everything in existence, right? "Goodnight, Dip." You smile warmly. He catches your eye and blushes violently, but recovers and shoots you a smirk. "G-goodnight, y/n/n" After that you get changed into your suggestive sleepwear, lacy f/c underwear and bra, and a faded, oversized band t shirt. You'd only feel comfortable looking like this in front of Mabel, anyway, who were you kidding? You'd forgotten to bring a duvet and Ford and Stan had taken all the spare ones on their trip with them, so you slept on the living room floor with Mabel, sharing the covers. After talking about nonsense for what seemed like hours, Mabel drifted into sleep, and so did you. Until a few hours later, checking your phone to be exactly 3:17 AM. Mabel had stolen all the covers, leaving you open in the draughty, cold shack. Little did you know that this was all part of Mabel's plan and that she was wide awake, fake sleeping. You tried feebly to try snatch some cover back but you didn't want to wake her, she looked so cute when she was asleep. So instead you ventured upstairs to check if there was anything you could use for warmth. You checked every room, the bathroom, Stan's room, the spare room, and eventually you came to Dipper and Mabel's. If Dipper saw you like this he wouldn't be able to take it. As you walk in, Dipper is splayed across his bed, sheets twisted, with a peaceful look on his face. You also can't help but notice his shirt has ridden up a bit so you catch a glimpse of a v line, and a toned stomach. He starts to move a little so you tried as quietly as possible to find some cover before it was too late. There was a high wardrobe at the end of the room, at the foot of Dipper's bed, that looked like it had some sort of blanket on the top. Reaching on your very tiptoes, completely exposing your lower half, you grabbed the material. At this exact same time, Dipper had woken (a very light sleeper) to see you, illuminated by the moonlight from the window, in pretty suggestive clothing, in his room. Just as you grabbed the fabric, which wasn't a blanket at all but just a jumper, Dipper cleared his voice, making you squeak. His voice still groggy with sleep, "y/n. What are you doing in here at this time?" If it wasn't for the partial darkness, Dipper would have been shown to look bright red. He had the biggest crush on you since you arrived, you liked all the same things, went on adventures all the time, had the same mindset, and most of all he thought you were the most beautiful thing in the whole of Gravity Falls, including the sirens, mermaids and even unicorns. You sighed, you'd been caught. "Mabel stole all the covers and this house is freezing. I was just looking for some extra blankets." "Use my bed. I'm used to the cold of this house anyways." He started to lift himself out of bed with a groan, in a tight grey tshirt and black tracksuit bottoms. He brushed a calloused hand through his soft chestnut hair, briefly exposing his big dipper birthmark. "No. I couldn't do that. Just go back to sleep Dip, I'll find another way." You were far too flustered to be in this situation. "Nope." He approaches you slowly, arms outstretched, and you're very wary of his actions. What's going on here?? He suddenly lunges forward, scooping you up bridal style, grinning like a madman. You instinctively wrap your arms around his neck, as he carries you to his bed. He gently lays you down and starts to step back before you realize your arms are still clasped around his neck. This is too much. Until something clicks and he starts leaning towards you again, eyes shining in the moonlight. He carefully puts his hands back onto the bed, leaning almost on top of you. As ever, Dipper was still being a dork. "y/n, can I...?" His eyes on your lips. You nod in return. He carefully brushes his lips against yours, hands cautiously feeling around your bare skin legs and slowly working up to your hips. He gets more confident and tries for a fully blown kiss, and you can feel him smirking. You bite his lip and he gasps, deepening the kiss. You and him lose track of time completely, just one person, his hands wrapped around your body, your legs entangled with his, your hands in his soft hair. How does he keep it so fluffy, anyway? With all that adventuring how does he have time? Your mind returning to the action at hand, you kiss for as long as you can before you both come out for air. It wasn't a fiery, passionate kiss. It was a soft, loving, patient one. A kiss that should've happened months ago. "How about we share the bed? It'll be super warm then." Dipper suggests, his breath against your cheek. You shuffle to give him room as your answer, him automatically wrapping his arms around your waist as the big spoon. He plants butterfly kisses on your neck before falling asleep with a grin on his face, and you also fall asleep, hearts beating in sync. You awaken to a snap of some sort, then blearily eyed, see Mabel grinning behind a camera. "That's one for the scrapbook!" She says before giving me a thumbs up and going back downstairs. Dipper shifts beside me, giving me a lazy grin as I reach up to stroke his birthmark. "I could get used to waking up to this view every morning." You then swat him on the arm, laughing, and then get up to go get breakfast, him ogling every bit of you until you leave the room. You hear Mabel shout from downstairs, "MY PLAN WORKED!" followed by a maniacal laugh.