#The Return of the Condor Heroes

[don-dake]

Meaning: If you have something to say, say it already!

Literal translation: Say it quickly if you have something to say, fart it out fast if you're full of gas!

Seeing @xiangqiankua 's 「有話快說，有屁快放」 post brings to mind for me, of 楊過 saying this line (more than a few times too, if I recall correctly) in 《神鵰俠侶》. Here's a version of the (almost) same line, for anyone curious to know how it sounds in Cantonese (sorry for the low volume):

In vernacular Cantonese:

🇭🇰🇲🇴 「你有說話快講，有屁快放！」

nei⁵ jau⁵ syut³ waa⁶ faai³ gong²，jau⁵ pei³ faai³ fong³

Standard Chinese (Mandarin) subtitles:

🀄 「有話就快說，有屁快放」

ㄧㄡˇ ㄏㄨㄚˋ ㄐㄧㄡˋ ㄎㄨㄞˋ ㄕㄨㄛ，ㄧㄡˇ ㄆㄧˋ ㄎㄨㄞˋ ㄈㄤˋ

yǒu huà jìu kuài shuō，yǒu pì kuài fàng

P.S.: It's usually enough to just scream 「有屁快放!」 at whichever unfortunate soul who has to bear your contempt and impatience! (笑)

[weaver-z]

[kungfuwushuworld]

Liu Yi Fei in Return of the Condor Heroes (2006) -  Wuxia World

[narcoticwriter]

Props to Zhou Botong for not only staying alive, but finding out about his son and reconciling with his former lover. We love to see him winning. Stay silly, king.

[pizzaandcoffeeintherain]

Remember the days when you had to wait a whole week to watch one hour of your favourite TV show as it aired on an actual tv and sit through ad breaks? And wait the whole summer break before getting a new season?

Unless you had Asian dramas rented on cassette tapes you had to rewind to watch.

[tiny-breadcrumbs]

3 am in the morning and my brain insist that xiao shunyao will make a good yang guo especially the older one in his 16 years wait for xiao longnv. He got that flavor of handsomeness where its more rough and wild instead of delicate looking. Man already build like a tank, he can fit in beautifully with a good styling in that kind of wuxia drama.

[tavina-writes]

hey tav, quick question! i just read your jin yong post and i'm new to his novels so. i was wondering in which one does the. uh. shizunfucking occur 👀 asking for a friend, as they say. thanks in advance! <3

HELLO FRIEND SO GLAD YOU ASKED.

The Shizunfucking (okay I have to clarify, the age difference here is somewhere between like, 3-7 years, SHIZUN is not very much older than her disciple here.) occurs in ROCH, Return of the Condor Heroes, which is the second book in the Condor Trilogy and the direct sequel to LOCH (Legend of the Condor Heroes) following Yang Guo (the disciple in question).

I won't spoil too much of the plot but like, this is where we get the stereotypical extremely beautiful ice cold dressed in white shizun and the besotted cheeky disciple from.

Also they have an ice bed. That she makes him sleep on. And at one point they have to practice martial arts together naked or it wouldn't work and they'd die. And they got married with a dead woman's wedding clothes and also she tells him that since she promised to care for him forever if she feels like she's dying she'll kill him and then put him in the same coffin as her and shut it so they'll die together etc etc.

And also at one point she pitches herself off a cliff. And they get horribly poisoned by the "IF YOU FUCK (or even just get a hornt boner tbh) YOU'LL DIE" poison. (do you see some common shizunfucker tropes here, bc MAN OH MAN.) btw this book was written in 1959-1961. They just let people put this in the NEWSPAPER in INSTALLMENTS like this.

And uh. yeah. Okay a lot happens in this book and it's not really ABOUT Shizunfucking but it's also not not about Shizunfucking. Like all Jin Yong books, this is a very book.

Also dw I've spoiled nothing about the plot.

iirc there is not an official translation and the ROCH adaptation everyone yells about is the 95 version which I can only find on youtube in Cantonese but it DOES have Carman Lee (who plays Lan Yi in CQL) as Xiao Longnv, which is a huge plus. I don't thiiiink you necessarily need to know what a LOCH is to read/watch ROCH but also I feel like it would make sense to watch/read LOCH first?

Feel free to send me follow-up questions!

[linggluu]

but his yang guo

[yingtoi]

[lovesick-joey]

Good Job.

"You really went on your own?"

Billy nodded his head vigorously, grinning like a fool even as Batman wiped away the blood off his temple. The older hero shook his head, his stern expression faltering slightly.

"..Get someone to accompany you next time." He grunts, ruffling Billy's hair. "I didn't know you can get hurt.."

Billy scoffs. "You? Don't know? That's impossible!" He exclaims, getting up from the stool he was sitting on. His height nearly towered over the Caped Crusader's. If only I was actually that tall. "But that's besides the point- I've got the whole thing covered! Put those scrawny robots into the spirit realm!"

Batman let out a faint sigh, taking a step back as Billy got back on his feet. "A warning would be nice. It's reckless for you to charge into battle without the others' permission. We haven't even made a plan yet.."

"You have to admit I did pretty good though!" Billy bounced, floating just above the ground. He punches the air. "I defeated all of them on my own! No plans from the rest of the League whatsoever."

As much as Batman disliked the idea of Billy—or anyone on the Justice League for that matter—pursuing a mission without a second opinion, he can't help but smile. He always had a soft spot for the boy, after all. He placed his hand on Billy's shoulder when the false adult returned to stand on solid ground. "You did. You did a good job."

Billy's expression softens, and Batman squeezed his shoulder. "Good job." The man repeated. Then, he looked over at the couches that were set up in the room they were in. Golden Condor sat stiffly, his unmoving eyes transfixed on the both of them, watching.

"Isn't that right, Condor? Don't you think he did a good job?"

Billy knew Batman made the wrong move. Why bother interacting with that jackass?

Golden Condor got up from the couch, but he didn't approach them. Instead, he glared at them from afar. It was mostly directed to Billy, though.

He never liked me, Billy thought. Well, guess what? I never liked you either.

"Don't praise him for doing something normal." Golden Condor spoke in that voice that would always make people grimace. He really needs to drink more water.

It was hard to notice, but Batman's shoulders tensed. "..Normal?" He uttered quizzically. Billy could imagine the look Batman was giving him under that cowl. "You think him going out to fight those robots alone, is normal?"

"It's normal to our standards." Golden Condor crossed his arms, his glare sharpening. "He should be expected to do it and punished if he doesn't."

What the hell, Billy thinks, feeling his heartbeat picking up pace. Batman stiffened. "Don't you dare speak of him that way." The Dark Knight walked over to the obnoxious man with an intimidating stride until the two were a few feet apart. Batman glared up at him. "He put himself in danger to save lives. He should be praised for his initiative, as reckless as it may be. Why can't you tell him he did a good job?"

Golden Condor huffs, looking at Billy, then back at Batman. "Because it's what everyone here does, Batman. It's nothing spectacular- nobody calls us good when we do the things we do. Why should it be any different with him?"

Billy couldn't believe it. Is Condor actually that stupid? It's even more embarrassing that this man is way older than him. A grown man is acting this way.

"And as if," The vigilante continued. "that child has the abilities of the Gods. I've said it before and I'll say it again; he should be expected to do it. He's not putting himself in danger because he's practically invincible."

"Superman has his kryptonite," Batman responded, his voice on edge. "and he's weak to magic. Diana also has her weaknesses and she's a demigod. Everyone on this team has weaknesses—it doesn't matter! You saw the blood on his head! It's still dangerous, Euge- Condor."

Golden Condor took one step closer, his haunting eyes ablaze with barely-concealed ire. "You're just coddling him," He said, his tone rising a little. "he's making you soft. It's pathetic."

Billy swallowed a lump in his throat. For the first time in his life, he was speechless. Batman's eyes narrowed. "I'm treating him with the kindness he deserves, unlike you," He said, jabbing a finger to Golden Condor's chest. The man in turn swatted his hand away. Batman's expression darkened. "you just hate him because he's a kid. I know how you are, Golden Condor."

The tension in the room was palpable. There was a brief intake of breath from Billy. They're going to argue again. They always do. Why does Batman have to go through this?

Golden Condor gritted his teeth. He was practically fuming. His aggression didn't deter Batman, as he continued to face him, his head held high and his chest puffed out.

"You're a fool!" Golden Condor spat at the shorter man's face. "If you keep this up then he's going to grow up thinking he's going to be given everything on a silver platter for doing jack-shit!"

"Just because you've never been praised doesn't mean you can't praise him!" Batman snapped back, unyielding. "Really, that's all that I want you to do; praise him! It's so simple and yet you have to make it difficult! I think he's severely lacking a parent figure who lets him know that he's appreciated—"

Billy's ears blocked out the sounds of their incoherent arguing—he could barely make out the words they were saying to each other. His feet were almost glued to the ground as he watched them, looking at their gestures and their moving mouths. It was a familiar sight with these two.

He could feel ringing in his ears, and Billy averted his eyes to the floor instead.

TGCS ¦ Mr. Hermit ‣ Dragon Eyes

[don-dake]

自訓話

竹月山•卜口中中中•卜口竹十口

小���女師父，賜畀我一啲力量吧！

弓金•卜月卜尸心•女•竹口一中月•金大，月金日心竹•田一中•竹手戈•一•口竹日戈•大尸•日一田土•口日山！

Grant me some strength, Master Little Dragon Maiden!

Just thought the dialogues below taken out of context, makes for a very good pep talk with myself (haha) with regards to learning (attempting to anyway) Cangjie, aka Congkit…

「只要你跟住我教你嘅口訣心法去修練」

「口金•一田女•人弓火•口一日女•人卜土•竹手戈•十木人大•人弓火•口日戈山•口•卜口木大•心•水土戈•土戈•人中人竹•女火木田火」

“As long as you follow what I taught you and practise”

「久而久之，習慣成自然」

「弓人•一月中中•弓人•戈弓人，尸一竹日•心田十金•戈竹尸•竹月山•月大火」

“In time, habit becomes second nature”

「更加可以速進度，一舉兩得」

「一中田大•大尸口•一弓口•女戈人•卜木中•卜人土•戈廿水，一•竹金手•一中月人•竹人日一戈」

“And you'll progress speedily, killing two birds with one stone”

[lintwriting]

How to Write a M/M Romance: Scum Villain's Bingqiu

Where Masculinity and Teacher/Student Intersect

Teacher Student Romance is the APPEAL, NOT a Plot Convenience

Easily the most problematic part about Scum Villain (beyond the dubcon papapa to save the world) is the teacher/student relationship baked into the main romance of the work—the one between Shen Qingqiu and Luo Binghe. Not only is it pervasive, it's not even brushed aside for the reader to forget about, the way the problematic aspects of other medias often are.

In fact, unlike the way age is brushed aside in fantasy dramas that have "teenage protagonists" for marketing reasons, such as The Vampire Diaries or Re:Zero, where the age is only there to draw in a teenage audience and otherwise the characters act like young adults, Scum Villain's Teacher x Student is purposely highlighted in a way that makes it clear that the dynamic is part of its main appeal.

For one, Luo Binghe's main form of address for his romantic partner is "Shizun," calling him teacher in a super respectful, almost worshipful way. This is the opposite of weakening the unbalanced dynamic. It's elevating the Teacher/Student power imbalance (in ways that make the reader suspect it's a kink thing for Luo Binghe LMAO).

For two, Shen Qingqiu is cognizant of how bad it looks to be called Shizun in a romantic context, feeling textually weirded out when it happens during romantic relations. Despite this, most of the ways he shows affection to Luo Binghe are very paternalistic (milf-coded), such as scolding him in fond exasperation or kissing him on the forehead like a father. In addition, Luo Binghe is specifically noted for not having older male authority figures in his life other than Shen Qingqiu, as his adopted mother was a single woman and his bio father could not care less about the son his late wife gave up her life for (seemingly for no reason, BUT I'll get to that in a different meta) (AND despite ample evidence that he CAN be a good father to Luo Binghe's cousin).

And while one aspect of it is that the Shizun/disciple dynamic is a genre-wide trope thanks to the influence of the early work, The Return of the Condor Heroes, wherein the Confucian taboo of the teacher/student romance is a source of tension and excitement within the novel, I wouldn't say that that's the whole of why Scum Villain (SVSSS) emphasizes the teacher/student romance.

Why are We Hot For Teacher: Return of the Condor Heroes vs Scum Villain

For one, within Return of the Condor Heroes, the romance is between a male student and a female teacher (because it's a het novel, lol), but SVSSS is a BL novel and wouldn't necessarily need to play into such tropes to create this "taboo"-evoking tension.

A lot of BL novels already play into the way being gay is marginalized or frowned upon to accomplish this, for instance, SVSSS's author's latter work, Mo Dao Zu Shi (MDZS) (The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation), wherein the main character has compulsory heterosexuality.

For two, the dynamics of the Return of the Condor Heroes is playing with heteronormative ideas about the roles of men and women in romance. It's notable that the student is the male lover, and the master is the female lover in this relationship, playing with non-traditional ideas about who is submissive and who is dominant—while simultaneously using it to reaffirm traditional pursuer/pursued dynamics.

This male pursuer/female pursued dichotomy is not usually explicitly stated within media as that can seem sexist and clunky, rather it is usually implicit and portrayed through various contrivances. Xiaolongnu is a "cold beauty" who therefore must remain pure/aloof, which is accentuated by her role as a teacher, and while she is "dominant" as the teacher setting the terms for their relationship, it's mostly to emphasize the lengths that Yang Guo, the student, would go to pursue her. He becomes extra romantic for pursuing her while accepting her lead on choices like separating for 16 years.

In addition, the teacher/student relationship is a contrivance that affirms society's implicit bias about gender by giving textual, non-gendered excuses for the man to pursue. In this case, it would be an abuse of a teacher's power for Xiaolongnu to make the first move. Thus, traditional gender dynamics where men are the ones pursuing women are reaffirmed without making clunky statements about gender, even through nontraditional dynamics like a teacher/student relationship where the woman is dominant.

But, again, SVSSS is a BL, so the two main characters are both men, meaning there is no societal answer on who should be pursuer and the pursued. However, it is notable that SVSSS does play with this same dynamic of "cold, aloof teacher" and student who would go to extreme lengths to pursue them, while also purposely describing Luo Binghe as the "peak of masculinity."

This is where we start getting into SVSSS's intersection between Masculinity and the teacher/student relationship.

Because while although Condor Heroes uses the teacher/student relationship to affirm the heteronormative dichotomy of the male pursuer/female pursued, SVSSS's usage of this dynamic is in service of satirically demonstrating the "acceptable" avenues of affection when living as a man (since there's no women, and they're both men lol).

Teacher/Student Romance as a Way to Escape Restrictive Masculine Gender Roles

Teacher/student dynamic is a huge aspect to SVSSS because it’s a way to escape the masculine gender roles critiqued within the work. This is on the face of it obvious. Shen Qingqiu lets Binghe act bizarrely clingy under the assumption that he’s merely taking care of a filial or needy child. The understanding that "masculine men have to be straight" and the understanding that "Binghe is the most manly person within the novel as the stallion protagonist" intersect to ensure that any affection between them is strictly platonic, which is a double edged sword.

Because Shen Qingqiu allows Binghe close to him with the reassurance that Binghe HAS to be straight (a surprisingly common way for straight men to interact), that means that as Binghe ages, his access to affection will also get cut off, since he's supposed to be aging out of the role of a clingy student and into the role of stallion protagonist.

This is even grafted onto the scum villain/protagonist dynamic, as exactly at the point where Binghe's on the cusp of becoming an adult, Shen Qingqiu is forced to be the opposite of affectionate and become the villain by throwing him down into Xianxia hell. Which, to him, means that he's killed his baby student and replaced him with a stallion protagonist out to take him out.

So when Binghe becomes an adult, he loses access to affection along two axises within Shen Qingqiu's mind. The first being that he's now vengeful stallion protagonist out to get him throwing him away, which is the explicit reason Shen Qingqiu rebuffs him. And the second being that he's now a straight adult man who isn't supposed to get affection from his old teacher, which is also a factor.

This loss and transformation into a protagonist causes him to become insane to almost comical proportions, indiscriminately killing people and so distraught that at any point he's liable to self-destruct—all because he's constantly being rebuffed when seeking affection from his teacher, who thinks he wants to take him out for throwing him into hell. It's notable that any time Shen Qingqiu rejects him, Binghe lashes out in an almost stoic anger, rather than with the vulnerable crybaby tears that Binghe used as a kid. All this is highlighting the consequences of toxically masculine gender roles—where a severe lack of emotional vulnerability creates only violence and status as ways to express yourself, leading to severe emotional issues.

Now this is where it gets to the satirical aspects. Because all that before is pretty angsty and not very funny, but Scum Villain is a comedic satire. This is because it's not from the perspective of Luo Binghe—it's from the perspective of Shen Qingqiu.

The Point of Scum Villain's Meta

To all of this, Shen Qingqiu is totally oblivious, as he is still under the impression that everything was platonic. Which I'd argue he SHOULD be, considering that Binghe was a young student in his care that he was only trying to groom into being nice, person not into a sexual relationship 💀💀. Now, the ethics of fiction about raising your spouse is a whole other issue outside of the scope of this discussion, but within the universe of Scum Villain, where we know his intentions, he gets the pass from me!

The reason Shen Qingqiu is oblivious is because one, as the most terminally online hater on the Internet, he's read about stallion protagonist Luo Binghe way before transmigrating into the story. And the Luo Binghe of the original story was a miserable sack of shit who got an unhappy ending despite being the peak of what masculinity "should" be.

A harem of women to show his virility, a stoic facade, and a constant stream of face slapping for hundreds and hundreds of chapters. He's an alpha male to the point of farce because Airplane needed to appeal to the lowest common denominator of teen boys on the internet—Andrew Tate's main demographic. It's not just a satire of YY novels—this, too, is part of Scum Villain's critique of toxic masculinity.

The second reason Shen Qingqiu is oblivious is because he's homophobic, sexist, heteronormative, etc. etc. etc. He was an INTERNET TROLL for a reason. And while people like to joke that he was a feminist king on the forums, I feel like it's more in line with the themes of the story to take him reading this schlock at face value because it's part of Scum Villain's trap! Anytime you feel like complaining about Scum Villain's hack writing, you're one meat bun away from an uno reverse card. The instant you start complaining, the author can hit you with a "Cucumber-bro calm down," and BOOM you're done! Never comment again!

And this is so effective because none of us want to be an un-self-aware, terminally online, trash-reading hater like him.

So, the satire of the novel is taking this kind of guy—both the Andrew Tates of the world and his basement dwelling followers—and wondering "Would gay sex fix them?" And the answer is YES, WHICH is HYSTERICAL to play straight in a romance like this. It's "Fellas, is it gay to like women?" but make it into an actual romance.

On a thematic level, being gay is indeed antithetical to a masculinity that upholds having sex with tons of women as the ideal, so it's doubly poignant for this closeted gay man to realize that the only thing he needed to do to live was to accept himself and the people around him by giving up his need to fit them into boxes—both on a meta "they're not fictional characters to him anymore" level, but also on a "toxic masculinity shouldn't define us" level.

Climaxing

The old Shen Qingqiu is dead. Long live Shen Qingqiu. Gay sex to save the world. Luo Binghe is back to his crybaby self. All is well in the world.

One thing I love about this teacher/student romance that it portrays Bingqiu afterwards as really happy and in love. Logically, nothing about that makes sense — 45 year old stepfather marries 25 year old stepdaughter from a bad home who idolized him, even while he acts like he's embarrassed to be around her and encourages her helplessness—but it makes perfect sense because it's a perfect marriage between all these different layers.

The "bird leaving the nest" conflict

Qingqiu is allowed to be affectionate with a scary adult Binghe because Binghe can be both a clingy student and an adult

2. The scum villain/protagonist conflict

Binghe never wanted to kill Shen Qingqiu, only to be loved by him.

3. The comphet conflict

Binghe never intended to go out and get a harem of women as a sign of masculine status, he just wants to be gay with Shen Qingqiu.

4. The "should I treat them like real people or fictional characters" transmigrator conflict—

Binghe is a real person separate from the character of Luo Binghe because he's no longer that unattainable masculine ideal—he's human and happier for it.

All solved with a student/teacher relationship in service of critiquing toxic masculinity. Now that's economical writing!

(I love the inclusion of the original Luo Binghe meeting them in the Extras, and that Luo Binghe is pretty evenly matched with him. I feel like the idea that someone "is automatically stronger with the power of love, and therefore that's why love is better" is pretty shallow, as it plays into the toxically masculine idea that strength is all that matters. Luo Binghe may not be stronger than the toxically masculine ideal version of himself, but he doesn't feel the need to be because he's happy the way he is. And his ideal self is jealous of him for that—not vice versa.)

On their own, these resolutions would probably still feel as creepy as Lolicon, but in the context of critiquing masculinity, it makes a lot more sense. Masculinity, I think, fascinates as a writing tool because there's a lot of mini tools baked-in its structure, like Shen Qingqiu's comedic plausible deniability thing, as well as assumptions about power.

For instance, since Binghe is quite literally the God-emperor of his world, it feels more like a kink thing for him to call Qingqiu Shizun, and not like he's actually less powerful than Shizun in their dynamic. His bouts of learned helplessness come off as traditionally feminine Sajiao, NOT like the learned behavior of creepy pick-me pedophilia. It's like a cat showing its belly, because we all know it's a murder machine showing its vulnerable side out of trust, not because it feels the need to degrade itself. So, while his behavior emphasizes the Teacher/Student imbalance, the reality is that he's doing it mostly for kinky reasons and that the two of them are on a pretty level playing field. It's extremely funny when people joke that he and Qingqiu are the same age due to all that time Qingqiu spent dead, because they are Not Wrong.

Problematic Kinks

Romance fiction is usually about ways to get certain needs met in ways that would never be possible in real life, which is why a lot of it is problematic. Virginity kink is not about real life virgins, but the idea that your partner is guaranteed to think you're competent in bed. Bodice ripper stories do not reflect the reality of getting raped, but is more about the idea of getting sexually satisfied with none of the shame of "being slutty" for desiring sex, since it was "against your will." Or they're about controlling the fear of getting raped within this safe romantic fantasy where everything turns out all right. Or various other things because kinks are personal.

Shen Qingqiu is the perfect example of this, where he functions as a great insert for female readers who might have shame around sexuality, since he's a "prude" without actually being one, hence his parallel with Xiaolongnu. Instead, he's just comedically under the misconception that he's straight or that Binghe's only platonically in love with his teacher—that's why he's always ashamed and putting on airs. It's a comedic/unrealistic version of comphet, so you don't gotta think about purity culture while reading your silly little stories.

And Luo Binghe is the self-insert fantasy of readers with daddy issues. His strict father who criticized him all the time actually secretly thought he was the bestest-westest, most handsomest boy in the whole wide world, and there was a secret understandable reason he had to be mean to him, and he secretly loves when he acts like a crybaby because that just means an excuse to pamper him.

And while in real life, many of these would be incredibly dysfunctional—within fiction, we can make these fantasies work anyway. If your romance manages to hit at one of these underlying desires in a fantastical way, you've got a hit with one audience of people! Whether that be by making them EVEN MORE dysfunctional (papapa to save the world) or by having them somehow communicate it out into a healthy dynamic (the extras, presumably).

All this to say, if you're a man frustrated with your love life, all you need is a gay, milf-y male teacher to ruin your life.

[narcoticwriter]

Yang Guo: -and then she said that it wasn't proper for me to marry her! So what if she's also my mentor? I love her!

Apothecary Huang: Hold on, let's backtrack for a second there. She said what?

Yang Guo: That students couldn't marry their teachers!

Apothecary Huang: Tell you what, since you obviously understand the point more than she does and are willing to commit sacrilege upon the social norms, I'll teach you some of my skills. Because I like you a whole lot and you've got potential in you.

[rottenpumpkin13]

since fireworks are on my mind (4th of July and all), what if there was a kind of similar fireworks festival in Banora or some small village and they either couldn't afford fireworks/the fireworks stopped working so Genesis used materia to make fireworks for the little kids!

ps, hope you're having a good time, stay safe in general, lots of love!!! ♥️♥️♥️

• Sephiroth fills his mouth with rice the moment Angeal drops the accusation, sensing his opinion on the matter will be asked and wanting no part of it: "You only ever take missions when you know there will be witnesses and news coverage to hail you as a hero." • Genesis is fuming. How dare his friend accuse him of vanity? As if they hadn’t climbed the ranks of SOLDIER together, enduring every trial side by side until they earned their titles. Genesis: “Do you agree, Sephiroth?” *Sephiroth responds by shoving an entire panko prawn in his mouth* • Genesis will have none of it. N o n e of it. He's now dead set on proving them both wrong, and as a rebuttal, he takes on a reconnaissance mission in a small village near the Fort Condor region. It’s simple and lacks flair: investigate a clandestine group selling stolen materia and report the findings. • The only interesting thing about this village is that his mission coincides with a major festival. He sees the locals bustling with preparations upon arrival. But he has to keep a low profile and can't reveal himself, which is a pity—he would have relished the awed stares and excited children flocking around him. • The mission is too easy: he locates the group almost immediately, operating on the outskirts of town near the woods where the festival preparations are underway. They’re selling rare materia to the locals at exorbitant prices. Genesis knows he could simply report it and be done, then return home to finish his latest novel. • But it's so terribly simple that he decides to take matters into his own hands. A skirmish breaks out between him and the group. Although Genesis successfully apprehends each one and confiscates the materia, a blast from the magic hits the nearby shed storing all the fireworks, rendering them unusable. • Now his cover is blown. The children and locals are indeed awed and excited to see him. But he can’t help but notice the children’s disappointment as they see the ruined fireworks, their sad eyes tugging at his heartstrings. It wasn’t his fault— how could he have known the fireworks were stored there? • He understands why this is devastating. He used to get so excited when the harvest festival back in Banora rolled around because the village would always put on the biggest fireworks show. He had fond memories of climbing to Angeal’s rooftop to watch them, while Angeal’s mother made apple chips for them.

• No, he would be damned by the goddess before he ever spoiled the fun for these kids. • Genesis puts his proficiency with magic to good use and uses materia to orchestrate the grandest, flashiest fireworks display imaginable. He pulls out all the stops—varying colors, styles, and formations, even crafting shapes like chocobos, moogles, and other fun designs that the children love. Genesis goes a step further by taking requests for custom displays, seething with quiet rage when a child suggests a firework depicting Sephiroth battling Bahamut. • The festival is saved, and he feels great! There were no news crews or cameras to capture the moment, proving Angeal’s claim wrong. Ha! Take that Angeal! • Until the following lunch hour where the trio are once again in the mess hall, except this time Angeal is smugly slapping down a newspaper on the table. The headline reads: "Heroic SOLDIER Genesis Saves Festival with Spectacular Fireworks Display!" followed by a candid picture taken of him laughing with the children. Angeal: “You just couldn’t help yourself, could you?” Genesis: “What!? It’s not like I wanted this! They took the photo of me, look, I’m not even posing for it!” Angeal: “Your vanity knows no bounds.” Genesis: “This is ridiculous. Sephiroth, what do you think about this?” *Sephiroth responds by chugging his ramen*

[accio-victuuri]

xiao zhan - legend of the condor heroes

"The Legend of the Condor Heroes: The Great Hero" was unveiled at the 25th National Outstanding Film Promotion Conference in 2024. The film was directed by Tsui Hark and stars Xiao Zhan. The promoter said that Guo Jing, played by Xiao Zhan, is handsome, chivalrous, righteous and cool. "Jin Yong Jianghu returns to the big screen, and a new world of martial arts begins." Looking forward to its early release!