#The Mortuary Assistant

[rubedeckillerofficial]

This is KILLJAM X X X.

~ Logo by Jasper Taylor and Meg Tuten, Logo text by @valdevia ~

The deranged, queer cyberpunk death game audio drama podcast that myself, @machetebisexual, @reignoftiramizu, and @cannibalmukbang have been working on for the last two years.

You can follow it right here on tumblr at @killjamxxx

It features actors who have been in:

The Magnus Archives. (As a Friendly Surgeon Who Cannot Catch A Break)

The Amazing Digital Circus. (As an Enterprising Organ Harvester)

Slay The Princess. (As a Sadistic Superpowered Assassin)

Final Fantasy Seven Remake. (As a Truly Evil Corporate Bastard)

The Mortuary Assistant. (As a Ravenous Wolf Woman)

Lackadaisy. (As a Helpful Murder Nerd)

Dimension 20. (As a Mom-Friend Dominatrix)

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure: Stone Ocean. (As a Cyborg out for Revenge)

Another Crab’s Treasure. (As a Homicidal Wife Guy)

The Kingmaker Histories. (As a Solipsistic Killer Clown Girl)

Caravan. (As a Guy You’ll Really Want to Punch)

Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch from Mercury. (As an Incredible Narrator)

Zom 100: Bucket List of the Dead. (As a Stab-Happy Street Punk)

Eeler’s Choice. (As Diabolical German Pawnbroker and a Humanoid Catfish)

Two Flat Earthers Kidnap a Freemason. (As a Loan Shark Who Might Be The Devil)

Less Is Morgue. (As a Woman Who Will Drill You To Death)

The NoSleep Podcast. (As The Ghost of a Questionable Father)

The Dead Meat YouTube Channel. (As a Terrifying Robotic Nun)

And that’s not even getting into the SNILF (Snake Milf), the buff lady with the eyepatch, the dorky trans reptile scientist, the charming British thief, or the evil undead Ringmaster.

You can subscribe to KILLJAM X X X on Podbean using this link here. We’re working on getting it on all the major podcatchers, including Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Official trailer drop coming October 31st.

[xxautumnivyxx]

It’s really cool to see a game I did voice work for on console again… it never stops being amazing and it’s such an honor.

Have fun with the patch updates!

[yappacadaver]

This summer don't forget to live life to the fullest

Lyrics courtesy of Skyhunter by Dethklok

[notokbutthriving]

Completely unrelated from our Parable au this is a collection of the original 4 in various games that we think fit them.

Moon: Subnautica: Below Zero

Eclipse: Mists of Aiden

Lunar: Inscryption

Sun: The Mortuary Assistant

[inspirationalucky]

"THE MORTUARY ASSISTANT" PROMPTS & STARTERS. demonic possession & hauntings. adjust as needed!

"i need help! someone's outside!"

"just try to stay calm. i know you're scared."

"this is very sudden, but listen to me. we have to start right away."

"i'm sorry, i didn't know until it made itself known this morning."

"i didn't know that it was here... let alone bound to you."

"i had no way of knowing the possession had started."

"you need to take this seriously. you need to act quickly."

"you can't leave, [name]! i can't allow that for you... or for others."

"so we stay calm... ok?"

"treat it like a normal day. staying focused will help."

"you don't have to believe me, but i hope you do before it's too late."

"the only way to save yourself is to banish the demon before you're too far gone."

"you'll need to learn the demon's name, bind it to it's chosen body, and burn it in the retort."

"i know this is a lot to take in."

"i had years to learn what i know. you have hours."

"you can't trust the phones. anything can be manipulated."

"good luck, [name]. i'm sorry this had to happen."

"yeah, screw all of... whatever this is."

"to banish a demon to hell, it must be bound to its chosen body and burned."

"you're just seeing things."

"i'm just seeing things... i need to get back to work, it's fine."

"it's my fucking fault!"

"don't really have a choice... i'm stuck here... fuck."

"you did this to me... it's all your fault."

"why are you still doing this?"

"i'm going to kill you, [name]."

"why did you let me die? this is all your fault."

"i regret every second with you."

"time is running out, [name]."

"hate me all you want. he's dead because of you."

"you should be the one here. lifeless... worthless... you're a waste of this body."

"you're wasting this body... give it to me."

"i should be killed on sight."

"this should banish the demon."

"my coming shall herald glorious sorrow."

"i will claim the flesh of man for my own."

"i need you to let me in, sweety."

"don't you love your grandma?"

"it's so cold out here... i'd love to come in... let me in, [name]!"

"let me in you little bitch!"

"i just want to visit you. don't you miss me?"

"awww, what's wrong [name]? don't be afraid of your [relation]!"

"i knew you'd find me... i'm all alone and scared."

"i'm fucking scared! didn't you hear me?"

"help. me. get me the fuck out of here!"

"oh, look at this... who are you now?"

"who could do this to someone? i think you should let me out."

"you'll be here soon."

"ok baby don't worry... it's ok, it's ok. i'll get you out of here."

"no, no, i'm not going!"

"get me out of here, they're gonna kill me!"

"come back! let me out!"

"where am i? what happened? let me go!"

"i'm sorry, this is the only way."

"seriously, [name], why are you hiding? don't be scared."

"let me out you little shit! you'll fucking burn!"

"you can never fix what you've done! see you soon."

"it's nice not to be the one down there for a change."

"did i make it? is it over?"

"it's never really over."

"oh, i've just been waiting... for so, so long."

"[name] isn't here, you fucking idiot!"

"here i am, you worthless old shit! here i am!"

"it's never over, but you survived."

"can i leave? i want to go home."

"you can leave. but once an entity finds you, all the houses of hell will do anything to get back to you."

"i'm sorry, but it doesn't end here."

"from now on, there's always a chance this will happen again, no matter where you are."

"i don't want this! i just want to leave! what do i do?"

"i'm sorry, but there's no going back."

"so, what? you're waging some selfless holy war?"

"it's not a war. it's survival. and i'd hardly call it selfless."

"i wish i could claim to be someone better, suffering hell to save us all."

"i simply want to live another day, just like anyone else."

"i could run and live the rest of my days in fear, or i could learn to face it and keep some semblance of a normal life."

"i don't know what you experienced, but i know it uses the worst parts of you against yourself."

"the more you experience, the more you'll confront the darkest parts of your life."

"i'm offering the tools to take control. the choice is yours. i hope you come back."

"what you've been doing is monstrous!"

"i've said already that i've had to accept everything about myself. just like you do. this is a necessary evil."

"she's down there right now, just suffering for no reason!"

"[name] is not down there! not anymore, she's been gone for years."

"you want to have a chance at life!? it comes at a cost. this cost!"

"you have to make a choice just like i did."

"i've seen many experience what you did. none have survived."

"i've watched them degrade and suffer until they're no longer themselves."

[yappabackup]

ik i said i didn't wanna post art on this account but i can't just not be posting art

[videogamepolls]

Requested by anon

[lupin-bun]

Next up.. @therealjacksepticeyeacksepticeye in The Mortuary Assistant.

Look how I struggled to fit "JACKSEPTICEYE" along the top of that title card! Pah ha ha! Trash. And if you spotted my misspelling of "Mortuary"... no you didn't ¬_¬

Btw, I don't know if I said before, but you can find all these on my art instagram too :)

[autisticjonathanjoestar]

I'm just saying if Raymond wants to be forgiven so badly, maybe next time he knows that I'm gonna pass out and wake up on the floor he can stop by the mcdonalds drive thru on the way to work. like. you want a friend, you sad old man? I want some coffee and an egg mcmuffin my head fucking hurts

[morbid-critter]

Alright so I’ve wanted to say this for awhile and it is actually my primary reason for creating this account lol. Just to clarify first though, I love horror, and more importantly I love unrealistic horror so please take everything I say with a grain of salt and do not think I’m trying to tell anyone how to write as that is not the case, I simply am really interested in this kinda thing and believe in the sharing of knowledge.

Anyways,

Embalmed bodies don’t really rot.

Embalming is the preservation of the body by replacing the blood with embalming solution and some formaldehyde, it makes the body a unfavourable food or nutrient source for any kind of bug or microorganisms which would cause decomposition.

If someone in your story is dead and you want them to be a rotting corpse then most realistically they’d have had a direct burial since embalmed body’s arnt supposed to decompose and typically if there was an open casket an embalming would have had to have taken place.

Again this does not mean you have to change your story or how you write in anyway at all, just wanted to share the reality for anyone interested.

-<3

[smashorpassgilf]

Raymond Delver from The Mortuary Assistant?

[imagine-darksiders]

So how spooky was the game?

First 10 minutes

Everything after that

[highlifeboat]

So I don't talk about Mortuary Assistant like... ever (despite it being fucking amazing) but drawing Zoey made me think about her and Rebecca meeting each other for the first time.

Like Rebecca drops in to get her pay stub or something and they kind of chat for a little bit because "Hey you're my co worker I never see nice to meet you" and then out of nowhere Rebecca goes

"So, do the demons give you trouble during the day?"

And Zoey stares at her like

[yappacadaver]

Look at my Mortician Dog I’m going to hell 😭😭😭😭😭

Outfit from this post

[warrenwaskilledbyadeer]

Raymond: It's pride month Rebecca you know what that means

Rebecca: What?? Do you want us to do like.. gay evocations? What?