#TOO emotional yknow
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
uh oh. feelings again
#at this point Im just emotionally numb#and at the same time#TOO emotional yknow#it has been two months since things went to shit#and one of my dogs died#had to be reminded a week after when picking up his ashes#in what was really a huge blur of a week of grief#im still fucked up from that#i briefly got sick w covid after going to paramore#i say briefly bc symptoms are practically gone now atp#only one has still considered me a friend despite everything#i think it's finally just. over#and no one wants to admit it#one's probably cut me off for good#i honestly wouldnt be surprised if he did#p sure he's hated me for a while#and honestly? maybe i deserve it#but also what the fuck#i wanna feel hateful I really do#but i just dont have it in me#i just wanna let myself blackout or smth#never wake up yknow#... i dont know what to do anymore.#vent
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
heeyyy gaaanggg
the pose and the background of the album version (left) are based on oingo boingos only a lad album art. not cause i think he has anything to do with it but just cause ive been wantin to draw that pose for like. weeks and i didnt know who to put there. so why not my latest bug man.
#my art#digital art#digital painting#fanart#resident evil 7#ethan winters#goddd PLEAAASEEEE#i havent known if i was gonna post this or not multiple times in the process of drawin this. but ultimately i spent too much time on it to#NOT post it. embarrassment be damned#but at the same time what am i even doin yknow. what is this what is goin on pleaaseee PLEASEEEEE#I DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT RESIDENT EVIL!!! I DONT KNOW N O T H I NG I KNOW LESS THAN NOTHING#HOW?? HOW DID I GET HERE??? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN???? i know exactly the answer to all those questions but it still boggles me how fast this#happened. usually it takes WEEKS if not MONTHS for me to start makin fanart. this was faaasttttt TOO FAST and im like. genuinely constantly#thinkin about this game. im ALWAYS thinkin about this game. part of why this took me so long to do is cause i always wanna play re7 or thin#about re7 in a strange and deranged way. ive actually genuinely been SICK WHAT HAPPENEDDDDDD#im losing it!! anyways this took me a looonggg ass time and i redrew it soo many timmmessss#i did like. 3 lineart passes. the album version i did 3 shading passes. i really struggled!! and ultimately i dont know how i feel about it#like i kinda resent it. for takin so long and makin me suffer so much#never again. never again will i spend that much time on a drawing. i HATE when drawins take a long time. i HATE that. it makes me madddd#ive been insane. ive been so insane. and im not gettin better like i cant sleep sometimes cause im thinkin about this game and this guy and#that gal like i think about them!! so! so much!! oh my god!!#in the time it took me to finish this ive done like 10 sketches for other pieces like. and ive had like 3 ideas ive written down.#and like 50 that i havent written or sketched.#IVE WRITTEN POETRY!! P O E T R Y !!!#i write the occasional poem when im feelin some kinda profound emotion but i NEVER write poetry about media SOBBING#anyways thats the post i think this is the beginnin of the end so lets hold hands and pray. ugh sorry if i get sick. im shakin.
157 notes
·
View notes
Text
anyway related to my "gullible" post i do think bonnie didn't really have a lot of friends / any good friends. i'm taking a watsonian approach to "some of the things bonnie does seem more like age 5-8 than 10-12", and a doylist approach to "everyone in this party grew up kinda lonely and feels disconnected from their peer group"
#thoughts#thoughts about bonnie#bambouche is so small no one woulda gotten away with being Mean to bonnie. and people were generally Nice anyway#they still had friends and got to do fun things with them#they just.. didn't get invited to play Every game#and the person they considered their best friend didn't consider bonnie to be even top three#yknow#lots of factors...#bonnie wasn't there as a baby/toddler - they arrived right at the age where kids start to remember and care who's already their friend#and bonnie and nille were 'the newcomers' and will remain as such for 10 or 20 years#and for the first couple years bonnie was behind in most social-emotional and academic skills due to their early years in an abusive house#and while they mostly caught up#'forming close bonds with peers' is just a rly hard thing to catch up on#bc if you're too far behind you just don't get the chance to practice and thus you fall even further behind#and then specifically some of the words bonnie needs help with i would expect them to already know / have no issue pronouncing#possible explanations could be that vaugardian is a second language or they've got some language or auditory processing issues#and either way - having trouble communicating can rly isolate you esp as a kid#also everyone in this party is autistic. to me#isat#bonnie#isat bonnie
92 notes
·
View notes
Text
Chappy 3 centaur time!! Post train crash Toma goes missing (hiding from Catnap, as the redsmoke probably outright kills smaller toys) for most of the chapter, and Player gets a leg injury! No more kicky for them :]
Lots of dream sequences are different, no Kissy Missy attack (though she still does surprise, shes just not trying to maul you this time). Probably Catnap tries to convince the Player to follow the Prototype at some point, idk
#little guys will see a tall creature and go ''anyone gonna ride that?'' n not wait for an answer#honestly Toma goes on its own little side quest but youll see it occasionally#i mostly set it off to the side bc yknow how if someone uses too much anesthesia on a person itll kill them? yeah. that#poppy playtime#poppy playtime oc#poppy playtime au#centaur au#catnap#kissy missy#nighty arts#sketch#dilly dally donkey#i think dilly maybe knew or interacted w the smiling critters at some point. why?#well i want dogday to say ''Don't dally Dilly" before getting puppeted. for the emotional damage 💖
191 notes
·
View notes
Text
i do think that gertrude “and by the way, your grandfather was gay” dndrag and adaine “i think you’re gay, dude” abernant would get along. if only for this reason in particular
#i mean they’re also crazy powerful magic users that others come to bc they have specific unique abilities#and have complicated relationships with their emotions that they try to hide from others including their friends#but like. yknow. gaydar buddies is a perk too#dimension 20#d20#fantasy high#fh#adaine abernant#dungeons and drag queens#dndrag#gertrude dungeons and drag queens
849 notes
·
View notes
Note
Either of these 🙏 they are so funny to me
peepaw's first time seeing light in 20 years give him a sec-
And a photo taken moments before disaster
#minecraft story mode#mcsm#mcsm jack#mcsm nurm#Mcsm vos#jack mcsm#nurm mcsm#Jack face in the second is too funny to me#Yknow when a man with a mustache makes a face and the mustache emotes with him?#Yeah.#Also I didn't realize Vos was so blue???#Like I should have noticed that dude what the hell#But DAMN#bro was trying to camouflage in the sea temple 💀#It didn't work#L#HAHA LOOOOSERRRRR#These ss were meant to be just quick little sketches to help me practice my style cause I want to do more detailed art while staying silly#But uh#Yeah I can't do “quick sketches” oopsies#Sorry for the wait!!
95 notes
·
View notes
Text
I can’t find a post with this information but my therapist shared a list of emotional support warm lines to use when you need someone to talk to but it’s not a crisis ;w; 💖
I wanted to share them here in case anyone needs the info because small things can accumulate into a big one and emotional support is always important 🙏💖
Wings Across Alabama Warmline (844) 999-4647 Hours: M-F 2pm - 8pm; Sat-Sun 3pm - 8pm (CST)
NAMI Orange County Warmline or The OC Warmline (877) 910-9276 or (714) 991-6412 Hours: 24/7
Project Return Warmline (888) 448-9777 M-F 5pm - 10pm; Sat 11am - 4pm (PST)
Community Warmline (203) 732-2004 Sun-Th 6pm - 10pm; F-Sat 6pm - 11pm (EST)
Cares Warmline (844) 326-5400 Daily, 8:30am - 11pm (EST)
Compassionate Ear Warmline (866) 927-6327 Daily, 4pm - 10pm (CST)
An Ear to Listen and a Passion to Care (844) 755-4673 M-F 12noon - 10pm; Sat 10am - 2pm (CST)
MHA Texas Warm Line (817) 546-7826 M-F 8am - 5pm (CST)
#emotional support hotline#pix habla#stay safe#mental health resources#uhh I didn’t know it was a thing but they’re good for panic attacks too#rather than calling the suicide line yknow ? because regardless of severity your feelings matter#anyhow#ye#if you have any more pls add might reach someone who needs it
58 notes
·
View notes
Text
“men are always willing to believe two things about a woman: one, that she is weak, and two, that she finds him attractive.”
truly insane to have a character say this and then make them actually attracted to men in any capacity. btw.
#dragon age#morrigan dragon age#i know i’ve said this before#captain holt voice. and you’ll hear it again!!#like listen. i know it would change the implications of the ritual. but clearly they’ve already considered#that you can have sex with people you’re not attracted to bc she can sleep with an unromanced warden or alistair or loghain#yknow it just ties into the whole. my mother raised me to be a certain type of way but that’s not me#i really like her friendship w a female warden and feel like it’s a good romance on-ramp but it would also be thematically interesting#if she were asexual#but i know 1) leliana was originally supposed to be a lesbian and that didn’t fly#and 2) if it was on their radar even a little bit. they would have avoided it bc of Problematic Implications#ie discourse about corrective rape. even though she’s the one who initiates it and makes it very clear. if she’s not in a romance with#that character. that it’s just doing a job that needs to be done and there is no emotional attachment there#i also think. perhaps. they could have done something different for the ritual ESPECIALLY if they’re going to call it that#like obviously it’s a fade to black scenario but persistently calling it a ritual makes me think there’s something Else that happens too#maybe lean into that#anyway i’m just saying there’s workarounds for these excuses i made up lmao#mine#morrigan
89 notes
·
View notes
Text
me when I have a cunty bob and everyone wants me to diiiiiie
#each of these conveys a different emotion tho. It’s like a sliding scale of intensity#aegon ii targaryen#shiv roy#armand#hotd#iwtv#succession#okay byyyyye#I’m not saying these characters are the exact same btw#hotd fans really struggle w comparisons for some reason and I don’t know why#like why are you mad that people are comparing jamie and criston or dany and nyra#they’re not saying that they have the exact same character traits#it’s compare and CONTRAST that’s part of it too yknow the contrast the differences
130 notes
·
View notes
Text
Like a déjà vu, but across the universes
#inazuma eleven#inazuma eleven orion#I think finishing the fic left me craving for more emotional healing and I found it in fubuki comforting ichihoshi after yknow#partly because he's also a brother but there's a Deeper Feeling there too he can't quite explain#own art#ina areori#<- might turn that into my ares/orion tag#might also need to go through my recent arts and put the shortened series tags in them too#.....and maybe I should learn to tag characters too idk
122 notes
·
View notes
Text
love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest
#not art#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit#kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it#until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it#until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her#but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs#she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying#probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone#lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear#Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked#but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now#yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc#man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet#and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out#lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help#it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around#but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever#its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous#its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot#yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry#doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it#ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking
107 notes
·
View notes
Text
Some more custom emojis. Yes the chicken doesn't match the vibe idc <3
Please like/ reblog if you use, otherwise credit appreciated but not necessary
#post let luce#my art#my emojis#figure i could use a tag for that#its wonderful to be like. “id like this as an emoji. wait im an artist”#still ofc learning curve to make things look recognizeable tiny but yknow#friend asks if anyone has a rubber chicken emoji? dont have one but can make <3#theres so many more i made too its so funnnn#custom emoji#custom emote#discord emoji#discord emote
104 notes
·
View notes
Text
Confession #475
#rwby#confessed by anonymous#isekai au#ruby rose#yang xiao long#well#since lot of Jaune fans seem to want that stereotypical straight man fantasy it could still work here kinda maybe#like do whole iskeaid girlypop learns that it turns out even the person born in that world can be unfit for it#and still keep trying and it could be all ~wow~ how brave!!! marry me?!?!? 😍#imagine being isekaid into rwby world and told yeah your negative emotions attract these monsters so yknow#dont have them too much#id explode
27 notes
·
View notes
Text
really rawdogging this trainride
#shedding myself out of my faux fur coat and all layers of my skin because this fuckass train has a temperature of 60C or sth#and i’ll be stuck here for another 4h or so oh my god#trying to finish this kuroo draft before i arrive. bouncy is on repeat. the shroom chocolate in my bag is looking a bit too tempting#got a tummy ache already might as well just add to that#wish i was in my pjs and at my destination already but alas. here we are#guy in front of me is scrolling through all of grindr on this train i hope he’ll get lucky#it’s just me and my 33 open tabs against the world. 1 is google docs 32 are poipiku links of kawa with his nuts out#for emotional support yknow. tipping my hat (i don't have a hat). oh i wanna go home already lol 🧎➡️#prayer circle for me. maybe an exorcism too idk#-`♡´- tulip mail
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
I’ve made a billion fucking drafts and can’t find the words to talk about cellbit and bagi from today. how the fuck do you explain the intricacies between a brother who has lived a life that has sharpened him to cut what he touches, and a sister who had to live with his absence? a man who has to see the childhood he never got to have whenever he looks at the woman he now knows is his twin? said twin who cannot understand why her brother would be anything but glad they are reunited? how do you get across that tangled mess of emotions cellbit had to get him to burn his old pet worm? the paradox of longing for what could have been while desperate to get rid of any reminder, with a healthy dose of paranoia that anything could be a federation bug. or the pure devotion bagi has to decide to stick with her brother even though he is not close to the same as he was when he went missing? the unfairness of it all, of cellbit being taken and made into a killer before he turned 14, of bagi looking for him at the detriment of her own safety and self, of ripped up childhoods and everything that could have been? the fact that the first thing cellbit asks is what he could have done to deserve it? the disgust he holds for himself for what he’s done, and the anger he has for the federation that’s taken everything from him, and the resentment he has towards bagi no matter how unfair it is because she never had to go through what he did? how after bagi swore to help him burn the federation down, cellbit went to bad instead, because bad was there and fought alongside him, and he trusts bad because he’s seen him at his worst, and all he feels like doing is his worst right now? the two of them so similar still because they’re consumed by their need for revenge, while bagi just wants to leave the island? how the fuck can you summarize all this and the emotions that accompany it?
#adding this here a lil too late but bagi’s own resentment because she’s been looking for years and he’s been doing nothing even though he#doesn’t remember#like great! you put more childhood trauma and the feeling you get coming home to a place that isn’t home anymore in my minecraft rp :/#like. fuck what do we do with all this???#there’s such a specific visceral anguish around ruined childhood and knowing that things will never be like the good old days again yknow?#especially when said childhood ruiner is ‘I was taken from my home and made to fight in a literal war’ like wtaf#or when it’s losing a sibling and missing them like a lost fucking organ#sorry if this is too train of conciousness I’m tired and word vomiting and emotional at all this pfkdjfjs#idk I have thoughts I cannot verbalize about this. tv static in my chest#all this lead up to tomorrow where Cellbit will finally meet hatsune miku#mcyt#qsmp#cellbit#q!cellbit#bagi#q!bagi#q!bbh#z speaks
157 notes
·
View notes
Text
I think the most baffling thing about the Tulpar as a vessel to me is the fact that the ship really did only have a one way communication system.
I know it was cheap but even the most basic of vessels regarding major transport would have some way, shape or form for outside communication. Not only that but there was absolutely no form of innate emergency signal to show they may have been offline or in trouble despite clearly having a system to dock credits if they went off course. It's another factor that really shows that bad situations are made to get worse by design. One person who is required to relay all information to the crew and make all the choices without feedback. No way to update or call for help in case of a dire situation. No way to inform of inner personal conflicts and acquire procedures accordingly.
It really is like they are all in some sort of fucked up solitary confinement. They have their own world with strict roles that are meaningless in the end, as long as the cargo makes it, it doesn't matter what happens on that ship to the company. They don't want to hear anything and will come to conclusions on what happened based on how much pay they can withhold from the workers. Even what they do send is short, sterile and corporate to the extent it was likely written and sent out with a command by some random unmanned computer in an office.
There's something to be said about how unfair it is to force absolute power and control onto one person when you as an entity could do so much more to offload it but I've said it many times before so I won't again.
#its just like idk i dont think Curly was a bad captain because we only have this scenerio and I certainly dont think a man like Swansea#would like him or have very little issues with him specifically if he was incompentent or too lienent in the past but I do think the stress#was making him worse and worse as being a present leader as it dawned on him how much he actually had to handle like I really think he#just wanted to do yknow normal captain pilot stuff and fly the ship and yknow the little stuff like make sure things run right and over tim#the constant stress and strain of having to make every major choice started to grate on him and freak him out cause they cant even fucking#eat unless he pulls out the scanner and starts cooking like he has to choose the meal likely or have a vote and i make that part of the#reason he seems so indecisive and inactive is the fact he has to make the choice all the time and he's hoping he can at least make the crew#feel a little more in control of themselves as people by staying out of affairs like the game or disputes because god he literally has to#choose for them all the time like thats a lot of responsibility monitering their sleep their breaks food consumption thats all on him like#it really should be another persons job entirely as thats almost like absoulte contrl over the lives of everyone else that PE forces onto#that title and its also crazy how everyone accepts it even if they dont like it like they broke the food machine open rather than get the#scanner they all waited two months before Jimmy appointed himself leader its so scary how conditioned they all are to the environemnt#cause that sort of mindset is sadly real where people just wait everyone just waited until it was getting real dire and then they still#followed Jimmy without too many complaints like i saw a fic or post where Anya acknowledges they all kinda just let Jimmy do what they want#because he became the captain and it was stupid on all their parts cause they could clearly see how bad he was and yet he was captain so#they just fell in line to their roles and thats a bigger point towards how PE treated them and the complacency capitalism brings to you#just like something that irks me because idk I know Curly is slow to act but he's not as like unopinionated as people make him out to be#like he does try to find solutions but they are still restricted at the end of the day by what PE provides them and I think his biggest c#crime is being in his own head too much and not giving Anya that emotional stability cause like idk man was he supposed to go to Home Depot#himself and install like padlocks? even if the let Anya sleep in medical after she pointed it out she was already pregnant at that point#like we arent seeing the inherent issue that no one not even Anya herself was thinking of the preventative measures because a)there was a#point nothing was happening that necessitated them b) it would've been the responsibility of PE to address them pre and post incident and c#there is only one person on the entire ship given the authority to do anything. You can not make multiple important choices in one instance#in such little time and Curly should not have had that total power like i think the most interesting thing in takes that really blame Curly#is that level of control they give him over the company. Like again i think about the three days we miss between the eval/party and the#convo/crash like i think people switch them around as if those scenes happen in succession when they are broken up and its heavily implied#Curly and Jimmy just havent been talking vs the depiction that she told him and for like three days Curly was just chummy despite the fact#Jimmy and him just had a blow out fight like the next time we assume they talk is during the crash sequence cause he honestly hangs#around Anya more which i think is really important because she trust Curly to defend her himself but not his judgement to give her somethin#to defend herself as she knows he believes her but also knows she's not seeing the danger the same and its heartbreaking and more
23 notes
·
View notes