#THIS WAS HILARIOUS TO WRITE I CANT LIE

[nullsleepy]

Hey, what if the Lazarus pits had a flush, author? What if whenever someone used it a fragment of their personality passed down to it, so to prevent it from being absorbed by the next person that uses it, it needs to be flushed? What if when Ra’s took over the pool he did not care for the advice of the the ones before and just used without flushing it? What if every time he used it, it became more and more corrupted by the evil in his soul? What if that’s why the Lazarus pits are the way they are right now?

The Big Flush

Part 1 - FLUSH THE PITS, IDIOTS!

Maribat!ToiletPitsAU

“You’re telling me, not a single person ever noticed the HUGE LEVER sitting RIGHT BESIDE it?!” Marinette screamed, frustrated beyond belief.

“Well, we noticed it, but we never thought to pull it down. Would you, Ladybug, hero of Paris, pull down a lever of unknown origins?” Robin sneered, glaring at the red spotted hero.

“MAYBE! Especially if THERE WERE HUGE LETTERS SPELLING “FLUSH”!” The teenager yelled at them, pointing at the letters on the lever.

“Tt. That is why you needed help to save Paris, imbecile. No one in their right minds would do so except you.” Robin spat, scowling.

“WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?” Marinette screeched, her voice breaking.

“Exactly what I said, you irresponsible fool.” He raised his eyebrow.

“Ugh, YOU!” Marinette took a deep breath, calming herself down. “Alright, fine, you win. But still, do you know the consequences that happen when you don’t flush the huge life-reviving pit?”

“Tt. That is why you are here, buffoon.”

“Just breathe Marinette, just breathe.” She whispered under her breath.

“And what compels you to mention your civilian identity?” Damian side eyed her.

“JUST SHUT UP BIRD-BRAINS!” Marinette’s face turned a deep red with her anger.

“

“AGH! I SWEAR I’LL-” She shook her fists, upset.

“Ladybug. Would you please continue with the explanation?” Batman intervened, attempting to get them back on course.

“You’re lucky, Damian Wayne.” Marinette glanced at the boy, before turning around and smiling at her idol. “Of course Batman sir! So the pits, as you know, reattach departed souls after death, essentially reviving a person. The body will be repaired, as is essential for the reattachment. It’s a side effect, not the main point of the pits. So, to fuel this, a part of the soul, or personality as most would describe it, is taken and left in the liquids. If you use the pits immediately after a person, then the part of the soul that was left will be attached to you. This might not immediately make you go insane, but it will result in slight personality changes. But, if you continue to use the pits after someone, without flushing it, then you will lose any sanity you have. You’ll be distorted in the worst possible ways. Even if you were the only person to use it, the pits will completely change that part of the soul. It’s extremely gross and life changing to not flush the pit.”

“So in layman terms?” Jason popped out, crossing his arms and leaning in.

“In layman terms, the pit is like this giant toilet, and if you don’t flush it, it’ll become really gross.”

“Oh. Okay.” Jason stood there, slightly shocked at the metaphor, before holding in laughter. The pits were just some huge communal toilet!

“Now, please tell me NO ONE has been using this revival toilet?” Marinette stood, looking up at them all.

“Well, uh.” Jason and Damian looked away, refusing to meet her eye.

“Our enemy, the Ra’s has.” Tim interrupted, pointing out the obvious.

“fUCK! Alright dimwits, let’s go meet this “Ra’s. Preferably before he goes insane.”

“Too late-”

Notes: I’ll probably make another part (or even a third!) that’ll go more into how Ra’s corrupted it, but I hope you liked this, @when-no-wings-do-broomsticks! <3

hehehe~

[luvchrltts]

dating mondo owada headcanons !! (sfw + nsfw)

ship : mondo x reader 🫡

— warnings : breeding kink, dimensions and measurements of his dick 😭😭, cccccunnilingus, dominant mondo (most of the time ….), erm js sex in general FOR THE NSFW AREA . no warnings in the sfw :3

reader : female anatomy in nsfw areaaaa

SFW:

love language is spending time with u <3 he stands on BUSINESS when it comes to being with u no matter what it is

takes u to the gym and shows him his routine (REOWWW 😻😻)

lazy af when inside tho 🤷🏼‍♀️

he lets u borrow his jacket that’s like 5x bigger than u — forgot to say that he is most likely towering over u

not shy or anything but he genuienly forgets to show affection . he thinks of u as a best friend

reallllyyyyy comfortable with u but u’ll never ever catch him lacking

u love to play with his long hair after hes just showered and hasnt styled it yet

more loyal than anyone ever could be . he thinks having ONE partner is enough LET ALONE TWO . and also he just wouldnt choose to be a cheater he doesnt see the point and believes its tooo much effort

mondo doesnt tease a lot he’s just kind of sly

he finds it downright hilarious when u say something that sounds dirty and he gets to make a joke about it 😭😭. hes got smth wrong with him

would do anything to prevent u from breaking up with him. he’s already lost his brother let alone the lohl ☹️ give him a BREAKKKK

nsfw under the cut 🙈

NSFW:

he’s so loud omfg

wants u to sit on his face .

no joke he literally gets off even to the thought of eating u out …..

goes pussydrunk

he loves ass im sorry

as long as you have SOMETHING for him to grab onto no matter the size he’s satisfied

………….. thick dick

alr just hear me out on this

shaft #AD8484 tip #97575F — 8 inches long and 5 inches thick ………. it doesnt feel right writing this x

if he feels like shaving he will if he doesnt he wont ✌️ he doesnt care what u do with ur pubes as long as u dont care abt what he does with his

he wants to be gentle he really does but he cant bring himself to be sometimes

not necessarily kinky but he’ll do whatever the fuck u want 😇😇 as long as ur happy pookie !!!!

as i said at the start he’s very vocal.. literally pants like a dog 🙇🏼‍♀️

his voice breaks when he orrrrgasssmmmmssss

his stupid hair bounces up and down when he thrusts inside u 😭😭😭😭 i find myself VERY funny 🫡

hear me out . he wraps his arms around ur thighs to hold u still as ur laying down and eats u out 🙏

u cuuuummmmm on his weird ass hair sometimes and he gets pissed ESPECIALLY WHEN ITS A GOOD HAIR DAY

maybe just MAYBE would he let u take control . but only if its a birthday treat or smth as i said u’ll never catch him lacking like that

toys are useless in his opinion … why a fake cock when hes got a real one waiting for u with open arms 🤗

'attagirl’ 'take it like a champ’ 'doing so well f’me..’ ……. I MIGHT TEML A JOKE BUT I NEVER TELL A LIE

bbbbbreeeeedinnnngggg kink maybe …… as long as ur alr w it

would laugh recklessly if u ever mentioned piss or shit or anything like that (as he should. as he fucking should)

erm thats it i hope it was alr for my first thingy evaaa lolz 🫡

[new-reading]

What are some of your favorite books or books you'd recommend?

@healerqueen

I've listened to all of the following at least five times lol hopefully some of them are new to you! But I saw you were an author so depending on what you write (what do you write?) they might all be familiar to you lol. * I admit I have not listened to the non fiction ones (are retellings of ancient Greek and Norse religious stories considered nonfiction if they're told in sort of an educational way?) more than once or twice.

* understood betsy (wholesome)

* Anne of Green gables (wholesome)

* pride and prejudice (rom with some com)

* northhanger abby (com with some rom)

* Ivanhoe (medieval based action sort of with definite com and a little rom)

* spells swords and stealth (series) (DnD world + regular world - light hearted)

* terry pratchet' Discworld (super lighthearted, magic. Skip through the description of the elephant and the turtle if you're not into it. Idk which books though I'm going through them all now for the first time and I can't keep their names in my head. The first two, a couple of the ones with rincewind, a couple of the ones with the witches and a couple of the ones with the night watch I re-listened to immediately after finishing). Not gonna lie, there are like five or six jokes hes made in the first 12 book that I absolutely hate and he wouldn't have gotten away with now.

* those wizarding books by she who should not be named on tumblr

* CANT BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT TO MENTION MY HOMIE RICK RIORDAN ) (I do not actually know him) LITERALLY ALL HIS GREEK/ROMAN BOOKS! I didn't realize he'd done any after the first five and goodness was I wrong. Greek/Roman brought to modern day? Action adventure fun with some more serious aspects.

* the marvelous land of snergs read by Stephen fry - I'm specific cuz I think one of the versions is an adaptation and I don't know which one it is (light hearted journey to magical land)

* little house on the prairie series up to little town on the prairie. That one starts to go in a direction I get less interested in. (Wholesome)

* The time travelers guide to medieval England - non fiction, admittedly only listened once but it was fun

* Unconventional Heroes series by L G Estrella (light hearted magical land fun group. The characters are a little overpowered sometimes but it's still a nice casual fun read/listen)

ianother one where at some point the main group

* the adventures of huckleberry fin! Light hearted adventure 1900?

*Matilda (light hearted sweet some magic)

* the da vinci code/angels and demons (don't recommend if you have any triggers, I skip parts) (sort of who done it + race to prevent a crisis + a cool sort of armchair indiana Jones )

* the utterly uninteresting and unadventurous tales of Fred the vampire accountant (light easygoing fantasy in modern world - at some point main group does start feeling overpowered)

* around the world in 80 days (most lighthearted of the three of jules's works that I know), journey to the center of the earth, 20000 leagues under the sea. (all sort of fun and adventurey and slightly fantastic but not magical, probably has a main character who's a professor or a scientist or eccentric intellect, 1880s maybe?)

* Pearls and Perils by drew Hayes (super fun comedy adventure sort of with a rag tag group and possibly a deity on an island modern day)

* the case of the damaged detective and the rest of the series - super fun sort of sherlock homes but modern day. Also drew Hayes.

* Edgedancer by Brandon Sanderson - magical other world with a hilariously irreverent main character and her sweetly stuffy partner in action who's a plant.

*the wizards butler by Nathan Lowell. Gotta warn you the main character does start off as a womanizer but it's just for character development and nothing very racy happens. Magic in the real world, mild action, adventure, and romance with some mystery.

* heroes by Stephen fry, troy by Stephen fry, mythos by Stephen fry, Norse mythology by Neil gaimon - all retellings of ancient religious stories (and a story about a war) for a modern reader. Heroes and mythos are about ancient Greek stuff

* the secret garden (sweet maybe 1870s?)

* CANT BELIEVE I ALMOST FORGOT MY BOY JRR TOLKIEN!!! Lotr, ttt, rotk

And things that should also be mentioned:

* twilight (vampires modern day romance)

* eragon (dragons other world action adventure)

* interview with a vampire (past and present?)

*the christi Agatha that took place on the nile and the one on the train (orient express) theyre who done it's

[orviposition]

What do you think Junghyeok's -- is?

FJDJDHDGDK help the idea that someone has gone through my account and thought "ah yes, that seems like someone who engages in meta" is hilarious to me 😭😭 i honestly would lie if i said i dont think about it often. after finishing the novel i remember gushing about the ending to my non-orv reader (yet) friend about how the system started working again bcs yjh said he no longer cares about his --. and i was a bit devastated bcs he Deserves one more than anyone but he hasn't reached it bcs his other half was missing. he cant be completed without kdj. therefore whatever his -- is, it's 100% related to kdj (just like sp's) but what could it possibly be, is the one million dollar question. at first i was like well maybe just like sp's it's actually a simple one, a "kim dokja" or a "demon king of salvation" or maybe even "reader" cuz the double meaning this simple word holds is too huge and insane

but then i remembered smth. i remembered how kdj, at some point, had two possible --. one being "epilogue" and the other being obviously "eternity" and since we know that hsy's -- is "neverending story" directly linked with kdj's "eternity" -- then im sure yjh's -- would be smth along the lines of "final chapter" smth he didn't write while in space even though he could, but also smth directly linked to kdj's "epilogue" -- an ending kdj had always worked towards

[degendog]

ayo its macgyver packer guy! ok so yeah cant lie hygienically that was like top 3 worst ideas at least, so instead of doing the sane idea of like just buying something or using a few socks (which WHAT you're supposed to pin that to you're underwear??) i committed to the bit and made a v2! party because its just fun to say "yeah i made my own cock", partly because its just kinda fun to make and i have enough art materials so that its more cost effective the buying something , and why im doing any of this in the first place is because its nice i guess to have it like attached to you..? i guess? and it not just like a sock? although its not 100% realistic (its fucking sliver), its still just pretty cool, so yeah i made a version 2. i made it using like a flimsy metal wire thats made for like crafts (to give it some bend, and so it would just be bricked) , duct tape, and hot glue. (no sock or anything in the center so no risk of mold) i first made 2 balls using hot glue, they weren't super big, i then covered them in duck tape. i made something of a heart-shaped pad using duck tape that i folded onto itself, and glued the 2 balls onto it. then for the dick part, i took the wire, folded it over about 4 or so times to make it thicker, it was about 6 inches in length. i then warped duck tape around the wire in 3 sections, tip, middle, and bottom, with a bit of space between each. in the space between, i cut strips of the tape in half, and warped it around to enforce to wire. i then put hot glue on the tip just so the tape wouldn't fray. i then split a little bit of excess wire in half at the bottom, and then attached it the the balls (would like to state that absolutely 0 wire is even remotely sticking out anywhere once i was finished). I then attached the whole thing the to a second underwear (underwear explanation: ok so i basically cut the underwear to be more like a harness/kinda a strap on when dick is added, to cut back on the layers id be wearing, and not to just wear 2 underwears, one with dick, and one encasseing said dick so that it wouldn't just be flailing around in my pants) finally, im going to be trying to see if wearing a sock just to see if thats more comfortable then using a fuck ton of lotion (the sheer redundancy and 100 degree summer be damned) and then boom! diy dick v2!! i made it in like 30mins, (tbh me writing this took more time then me actually making the dick) and if its incoherent or misspelled sorry its pretty late over here :3

okay so i tried to answer this but tumblr ate the draft augh. trial two i guess.

fucking. WIRE??!!!?!?!! bro.

yeah, you’re supposed to pin the rolled sock in place, unless you’re wearing packing underwear. you put the sock inside where the dick would go, whether that’s a pouch or a closed fly or whatever and you use a safety pin on the outside of your undies, stick it through the front of the sock, and back out the front. the safety pin should not go through the sock all the way. works best if you wear boxer briefs or regular briefs—. i use a quilting sewing pin bc the bent shape makes it easier, but anything with safety pin functionality will work. i know a guy who used a “yaoi lover” circle button pin.

the hot glue balls are lowkey hilarious. i’m imagining what those feel like lmao. “what if—hear me out—the balls got hard too” type shit. that’s hilarious. what the hell.

and while the absence of a fabric core is an improvement, from experience i know that duct tape is not necessarily watertight man. like one little wrinkle at the edge of the tape and all of a sudden you’ve got all kinds of liquid and shrapnel in there. and hair. ew.

also. wire. even if you’ve got the wire ends covered, it’s not guaranteed that they won’t poke through and stab something. idk about you but i wouldn’t risk dick impalement over the like $30-50 a real packer would be. or free, in the case of a rolled sock. seriously, if penis procurement is an issue, whether for financial or other reasons, please just use a sock.

if you’re desperate to diy something here, you probably could sew a harness for a regular packer out of elastic, or modify your existing undies to better accommodate a packer.

please let me know how the sock packing goes. if you need further advice on the matter lmk. i lost the tutorial post i made a while back, but im more than willing to remake it.

you have a bright future as a sculpture artist. i’m picturing a series of various unsafe insane diy packers in a gallery. and/or a series of photos of you wearing these diy packer apparatuses exactly one time. could be cool as commentary on transition being an act of recreating yourself with whatever you can find. or something. idk you can workshop that part.

please, please be safe lmao.

[theivydorms]

ROSEWOOD RENAISSANCE READATHON DAY TWO (part one)

THIS IS YOUR SPOILER WARNING and yappuccino warning, im yammering on quite a bit

the way I was immediately able to relate to Lottie recognising car brands from hanging around a boy was insane from the first time I read it to now

"she was not like the other students" Eleanor not like other girls Prudence Wolfson we love you

BINAH MY FAVOURITE WALKING PILE OF BOOKS

Lottie calling Binah "tiny owl girl" then Binah's next words being "fledgling" is beyond perfection and yet another example of connie's writing prowess

the first few times I read UP I would spend ages to trying to see if I could work out what "idiopathic craniofacial erythema" meant but now I know that I will no longer understand science words since getting a C at Nat 5 physics and running from the science department like my life depended on it

if someone has drawn, is going to draw, or has seen art of the archway with the engraved copper portraits of the founder PLEASE LMK! ID LOVE TO SEE IT

I do love the prominent inclusion of twins throughout the series as a twin myself BUT THE FACT THEYRE ALL SO OFTEN LUMPED TOGETHER MAKES ME JUST A LIL ANNOYED. were Shray and Sana attached physically at the hip? why would they both have founded one thing? I dont get it but I do appreciate it cant lie and ofc the parallels to the Tompkins twins!

I for some reason just got like whiplash from Lottie introducing herself as Charlotte to Binah - I think that might be the only time she introduces / refers to herself personally as Charlotte? like the "y" sound at the end of name and the soft L sound at the start just make so much more sense for from just a oration aspect

"If she’d only known in that moment the domino effect those words would have."

QUESTION ( I know Lottie was tired and overwhelmed but) do English people genuinely think about their counties so often that they'd possibly assume someone asked if they were FROM ANOTHER COUNTY? WHILE AT AN INTERNATIONAL BOARDING SCHOOL? like im Scottish and I think about the area im from like regularly but if I thought someone asked me if I was from another county / shire / area I would be wondering why the hell they would be asking that so specifically

honestly iconic and hilarious of Binah to add "she's international" when introducing Lottie

OKAY IVE BEEN TALKING TOO LONG - chapter four and hopefully five will been in a separate part!

[mangoposts]

Bro I always laugh at those rumors not gonna lie like they're so funny to meee. Like it's obvious that they're just like us fr they want to be in relationships and they will be at some point but it's HILARIOUS

Don't get me wrong im a nosy person too but like we need to chill a bit and let those men RELAX there are new rumors every fucking day like aren't you bored?

Anyway, I want Matt to write a book about mental health or something written by him. Like journals or something, I need his little cutesy quotess

I feel like Chris has found a new team for his brand. I think I saw someone say that the site doesn't work so yeah, maybe he's upgrading it just like he wanted to

Nick I honestly don't know what he could do for his personal project. It has to do with lifestyle so maybe you're right about photography but idk how that would sell

I don’t think the mission is to sell anything i think they’re all just working on their own individual projects that they could call their own, Nick could be trying to amp up another photography account or start using his second channel more for videography. Or he could put the photos he’s taken on clothes and call it day

But i feel like Nick might have something bigggerrrr idk i cant get it

[kidfoundonstreets]

okay uhm the scarf guy and the pigtsail guy from yttd . and charlotte and lime from wh. and uhhhhhhhhh anyone from cinderella game

head in hands HIAAIIEY HYEHEYEH HAII ROBIN <333!!! TAHNKYOU please know the opffer is pen for you anytime.. anywhere.. smooches your forehead okay so i like the pgistial and scarfie scarf guy because theyre so fcuked up ina ll of the ways. i like how they make me wanna throw up and shove my head inside a sewer while inhaling fanfiction of them like toxic gas. that aside the angst and to put it simply fucked up potential in their dynamic is what draws me to them, i enjoy how complex it could be - your abuser could love you but not in all the right ways, it could exist, shin and how they care about one another with the idealistic frankly obsessive posessive view midori has with him as well like the cut scene of him c rying over shin HELLOOO?? anyway theyre silly to me. guy who lives in your house is also your roomammte old friend bestie lover worst person you know etc jerk weird weird satrange weird. i could write a lot more if it was speciifc but im very bad with words sooaoaahahdhwh <3 oh and gore chalrtotoe and lime are also one of my fav dynamics yesss horrible yuri. chalrotte never wnating to give up on lime while lime has al;ready given up for any sort of proper undertsnaidng she craves bwteen them, heyre friends but one wants more while the other doesnt, it doesnt even have to eb romantic it just hurts because charlotte was all by herself or maybe just singled with the others apathy toward semotions so seeing lime full of emotion and passion and pain who could get chalrotte probably also ironically struck a chord in her - and shes always worried for her, like she might go too far, and when she does she just starts crying. thats the good shit. a hoepless ending a hopeless dynamic but they kiss sometimes in my brain to make it worse. perfect. that cinderlelal game ,, ,,,, !! oh god please dont stirke me here IM SO EMABRARSED i dont have any ships in that game so ill go on with that xoxoxoxoxooxox dorpelts one ive been playing ! i really like how with shiloh theres this fake "is this true is this not" with him, you never really know and thats what the fandom loves about him whcih i agree its an addicting type of thang, and even in the end its not completely clear. all we relaly get is that its sure at least that he does value jb at least a ltitle or see her as of value, as she does end up consistnetly vomplimented talked to and by his side through the end. he cant have a verison of hismelf that isnt manipulative, long gone, and you need to accept that. theyre awful divorce. i cant get enough of it. jbs overflowing confidence and shiloh right beside her like a dog with a knife, begging for any sort of scraps because hes a liar. a mnaipualtor. like jeoekr! or kokcichi . ezxcept hes actually good . can you imagine it. ironically hes probably the most untrustworthly one there becausre atleast the others say what theyre thinking. shiloh is a mixed bag and every word has at least a little bit of a truth and lie to it.

ut thats how they like eahcother and its fun interesting we arnet here for a long time we're here for a fun time for nate it givess a bit more of a genuine perspective, im not used to jb being comforitng or nice tbh lol. but its clear that they atleast fiteachother even if jb isnt the nicest one for him - i think shes the only one who can keep up with his intense moods and issues stacked on him and his rough exterior. hes honestly a pretty decent guy if you dont piss him off whcih is easy. closeness issues. commitment issues. nothing is ever stable issues. i get it bro. the thing with all of these dynamics in this game is that they do somehow in a hilariously awful way is complete eachother, i cant say if any of them will end well but its obvious that theres chemistry in all of their interactions and i love love love this game. anyway i also relaly liked how with nate you dont kiss him at all and instead get a hug at the ened, its nice compared to shiloh who just goes along with everything and how jb is pulled to his wants at times (while with shiloh shes the one ofc usually taking all of the lead while hes the jester) - i think it really digs in how much he trusts her to go that extreme and vomit-inducing lengths at the end because he wants their kiss to be perfect qnd it isnt perfect right now. but hes ready to keep going because of this stupid bitch (jb). and i find that super sweet

[fdblaize]

fic recs? :3

okay im gonna be completely normal about this okay 😀👍 also these are just off the top of my head

As Water Wears Away Stones & Sunset - real sad shit really cuz i hate myself think when ur parent slowly loses their memories 🥲

Missing Everything - THE GREATEST MOTHERFUCKING FIC EVER i shit you not i love this with my whole heart its secret dadmight i really really really love how they write yagi and izuku and how theyre reflections of the good and bad traits of each other i wish i had the ability to stfu about this fic *clenches fist* i just fucking love secret dadmight

Heist Alliance - tiny deku and kacchan stealing from yagi aaahh my heart

Despite Your Good Intentions - OH MY FUCKING GOD READ THIS 😭 this one put a dadmight shaped noose on my neck and i thanked them for it‼️

Serendipity - holiday bonding‼️theyre both dorks here and i mean that lovingly LMAO

Fear No Evil - GET READY FOR THE MOST INSANE FIC YOU'LL BEAR WITNESS TO AHAHAHA but seriously tho sometimes i think of this fic the ability to breathe appropriately abandons me

Take My Place on the Witness Stand - not really dadmight but extremely hilarious am fic

how he live forever but ain't got time for his kids - I CANT BELIEVE THIS ALMOST SLIPPED MY MIND but anyways this is the best of both worlds its DFO and Dadmight and lemme tell me theres nothing more fucking hilarious than afo and am wanting to strangle each other but cant cuz inko will have their hides. no 1 hero who? demon king who?

For Want of a Hair - without appropriate context am and deku's relationship really really is bizzare. and i especially love it when kacchan is dragged into it 😂

Can I Tell You A Secret - izuku high off pain meds

I will not ask and neither should you - soulmate au where you cant lie👀👀 "if toshinori won't be emotionally honest and open with izuku then I Will Force Him To Be" <- the tags speaks for themselves 😂😂😂

[13tinysocks]

New chapter was so!!! Nina is soooo cool, I knew a girl kinda similiar to how you portray her in school at one point. and she was so hot and bold and ran her friend group like the navy/pos, i liked her so much i threw up a few times. And she made me realise i like girls!! I will eat drywall once they kiss. and her and toby make make such fun duo!! And helen is so ethereal but not in an angelic way, more like xe will turn into spring breeze at some point, and you DID NOT lie about wanting ann shes so hot it makes me look stupid. Actually, if this isnt a spoiler or smth, are you planning on writing her as ace or something like that? Since shes not in the dateable lineup i dont want to be weird with any comment

love how you guys write drama and stakes bigger than life and all of that but MAN can you write some silly people! Honestly this is everything I couldve ever wanted from the mansion genre, cant wait till they all eat each others insides.

Reminds me of my first girl crush who wasn't miss bellum from ppg- her name was Annette and she was a baby scene kid in my Spanish class. We bonded over being unlabeled queers and hating men and our teacher.

One day a kid in my class put meatspin.com on one of the class computers and left it for our teacher to find (this was 7th grade so it was hilarious) the teacher next class was upset obviously and nobody would rat out the kid who did it bc we all knew

But Annette did bc she threatened to take away our computer privileges. The kid had to go to therapy lmfao and I stopped liking her bc like... Snitch. I get it but... Snitch.

Anyway Helen is. Helen. I want y'all to take Tim's warning SERIOUS. Xe is.

We haven't fully decided on what's going on with Ann but we do know she has some pretty bad hangups and oh is like 100 years old.

Anyway Nina. The drama gets worse bye

[carpisuns]

Hello :)

You always give the best recommendations.

Do you have some Adrinette and Marichat recs (art and writing)?

Fluff and happy endings are very appreciated.

Thank you! (I hope you are well) 🤍

Oh thank you 😌 I pride myself on enjoying good things djdjdk

i've recced a lot of these before so sorry alksdfja they're just so good! also sorry i aways go overboard with recs lol I CANT HELP IT, PEOPLE MAKE SUCH GOOD THINGS THAT I LOVE

this list ended up very long so I’m putting it under a cut fjdjdm

adrienette fics:

golden (like daylight) by @anna-scribbles — FAV FAV FAV literally so exquisitely written, gorgeous prose, lots of nuance and it all ties together to perfectly at the end HNNNG it has some Angst but it’s also very soft and the end is so fluffy💜💜

more than words by @zimtlein — another current fav, ongoing wip!! adrienette fake dating, angst but also lots of humor and shenangians (pre reveal pre relationship)

Operation Mega Sleepover by @smellerbeee — literally the purest sweetest adrienette friendship ever 😭(pre reveal pre relationship)

Comfort Food by Reiaji — GORGEOUSLY written adrienette bonding thru cooking lessons 🥺(ft. reveal)

the right side of his face by @hamsternamedmarinette — i just really love this, it's well written and i think it shows their relationship in a beautifully nuanced way 💜(pre reveal pre relationship)

new marinette by @rosekasa — this is a marinette memory loss fic so it's so sad but it has a perfect happy ending, dw! (alizeh also has tons of fluffy adrienette oneshots so check them out too!)

the roses still bloom by @botherkupo — this one is sad but so sweet and pure i just 🥺🥺🥺 platonic hurt/comfort, pre-reveal

Make It True by @ominousunflower — prpr closet makeout alkjdfasf

Plaggatouille by @gabriel-agreste-has-no-rights — peak adrienette shenanigans + cute reveal!

Short-Circuited by @mikachu-chu — this fic has such cute chaotic energy hdjdjd I love it. ft that one Electric Love tiktok trend 👀

Photograph by @sha-nwa — this one makes me cry but it's still fluffy just like.......bittersweet 😭(post reveal, established relationship)

marichat fics:

the way i loved you by @sha-nwa — FAV, ongoing wip that owns my entire mind!!!!! painful but so so good and beautifully written 😭

a lie for a lie by @botherkupo — I always gotta rec this one, Kim’s a fantastic writer and this is one of the first things I read in the fandom and it’s still on of my favs! Marichat fake dating (kim also has tons of other amazing marichat, check out all of it lol but Glad We’re Friends is so sweet and I’ll Be Your (Wing)Man is hilarious)

spark by @zimtlein — marichat tinder fic that starts out silly but evolves to be more angsty and it's like a delicious slow reveal aaa

home is where your wifi connects automatically by @zimtlein — cute marichat reveal!

Madame Snare by @jettiebettie — possibly my fav marichat fic ever aaaa such a good, in-character, canon-compatible exploration ft adrien (detransformed) acting as chat who is pretending to be a female model asflkadsjf i cry it's perf

Loopholes by @gabriel-agreste-has-no-rights — I don't think I've recced this before but it's such a cute and sweet marichat reveal! (also check out Tali's other marichats bc they're the best,,,I will mention Charcoal Lines but literally they're all my fav haha. ok also read Tastes Like Dirt. And Your Kitty. And The Wrong Balcony. Screw it all of them!!! dhsjsm)

Ladies’ Choice by @smellerbeee — this has been a fav for a long time, she just gets them and I love Kim’s writing 😌

where timing is kind to us by @deinde-prandium — this one is so sweet I just really like it 🥺 they’re nerds and they’re in love

A Breath of Fresh Air by @trashcatontherooftop — I’ve reces this a bunch before but it’s such a perfect wholesome brand of marichat dancing that like bt platonic and romantic!! wip

these are more like drabbles but they're so delicious i wanted to include them as some Tasty Tidybits

and i never saw you coming by @bugabisous — marichat fluff

i feel you holding me (tighter, i cannot see) by @botherkupo — marichat angst

This one is adrienette and marichat so it deserves its own category haha but How to Be a Hot Mess by @botherkupo is so cute and fun!

as for art!!!! here are some of my fav adrienette and marichat pieces :) these artists all have tons more amazing content so I highly recommend checking them out!

umbrella scene by @jascurka

adrienette sleepover by @anna-scribbles

post-reveal adrienette by @sweet-childhood-dreams

ML Amalie by @shishitsunari

Adrienette Phinbella by @inkshila

adrienette cuddles by @leviaana

umbrella adrienette by @nokkiart

Weredad animation by @bugaboo-n-bananoir

cute marichats by @thechatsmeow

marichat movie night by @queenlypirate

marichat sketch dump by @eona-art

midnight spaghetti by @cat-saturn

reverse crush animation by @miraculouslylazybug

marichat dating by @sabertoothwalrus

grocery store marichat by @matchalaatte

marichat cooking by @zivazivc

comfy marichat by @secondlina

[messrmoonyy]

Hay, could you do number 44 for Remadora plz...😘

Some happy fluffy post deathly hallows fluff because they deserve it.

Also psa to people who have sent requests, i don’t write them in the order I receive them so if yours is taking it while it’s simply because others have given me more motivation. But it’ll show eventually :)

Prompt: sitting on the other’s lap

Pairing: Remus lupin x Nymphadora Tonks

Warnings: none

You can find all my other writing on my masterlist and remember my ask box is always open, so drop me a request! Check my masterlist for who I write for!

Remus couldn’t sleep, the same as most nights just lately. He rolled around in bed for a few hours but eventually got up, not wanting to wake Dora. She was easily woken still, her motherly instincts still on high alert even if Teddy was past the age of waking up screaming in the night for food. And there were still old habits from the war, never truly letting yourself fall into a deep sleep. Always on edge and ready to jump out of bed and fight at a moments notice. He’d still wake up some mornings to see she had her wand clutched in her hand, still fast asleep.

She still had nights filled with nightmares too, as did he. She often asked him when they’d go away. He dare not tell her that hadn’t even gotten over his from the first war yet, Never mind the second, and that they would never truly leave her. He simply gave her the same answers every time

‘Soon my love’

‘You’re getting better everyday’

‘They won’t be with you forever’

He didn’t like to lie to her, but he couldnt bare the truth.

Thankfully him getting out of bed hadn’t seemed to have woken her from her rarely undisturbed sleep and he’d placed himself in his armchair by the fire. Christmas was coming around and the only light in the room came from the tree and the fire burning in the hearth. It felt wonderfully cosy. And homely. And domestic. And he adored it.

He finally had the family that he’d always wanted and dreamed of. He’d popped his head into Teddy’s room before making his way downstairs, the 3 year old sleeping soundly splayed out in his bed. Much like his mother he liked to take up as much room as possible, far more than a person so small should be capable of. He’d dodged the two creaky steps on the stairs and was now quite peaceful with his mug of tea and the fire.

They’d moved into the small house in hogsmeade not long after the war had ended, Remus has graciously taken back his position of dark arts professor, so it made sense for them be close to the school. Dora had been given her job back at the ministry with a hefty promotion too. Things were…. Good. They were all still in that sweet post war period where every seemed to get on, the darkness seemingly having been permanently shut out by the light. He didn’t know how long it would last. It hadn’t lasted particularly long the first time around. But then again this did feel different, because maybe the first time around the darkness had never really left. But it felt like it had now.

His days were constantly filled with light now, the bright faces of his students, the familiar feel of belonging in the hogwarts halls, then coming home to the smell of Dora attempting another one of Mollys recipes, Teddy charging around the house on his tiny broomstick that Harry had gifted him the Christmas before. Just waking up to his family, going to a job he adored and then returning home to his wife. His child. Some might call it an unbelievably dull existence, but he couldn’t think of anything he’d want more.

Even his monthly transitions weren’t as dreaded as they used to be. Wolfsbane potion was within easy access of every man, woman or child that needed it from the ministry. And no stigma was attached to collecting it either. Of course the overall acceptance of Lycanthropes was still a work in progress. But it was the best it had been in forever. His full moons no longer consisted of having to lock himself securely away, writhing and screaming for hours and hours as his bones broke and re set themselves. No, now he spent them curled up by the fire with Dora at his side simply napping the night away.

Occasionally he’d let himself think of the people he’d lost, all members of both the original and the second order that had lost their lives had gained portraits in hogwarts. Alongside all the other brave individuals that had died. He visited Sirius, James and Lily often. It got easier every time. Though James did like to throw the occasional jibe at his age, the James in the frame forever stuck in his twenties whilst Remus was in his forties now. Not that he minded. He didn’t think he’d ever reach that age so he was happily embracing it.

“ cant sleep? “ he startled slightly as a voice broke him from his daydreaming and he turned his head. Dora was stood at the bottom of the stairs, a sleepy smile on her face and rubbing at her eyes.

“ Sorry Darling did I wake you? “ she shook her head and yawned. He smiled warmly at her and placed his mug onto the coffee table before opening his arms. She returned the smile, grabbing a blanket from the back of the sofa before shuffling sleepily over and climbing into his lap. She wrapped the blanket around them both and his arms looped around her, holding her close “ Teddy alright? “

“ snoring just like his father “ his heart still did little flutters when he was reminded of the fact he was in fact a father. A proud one too “ nothing could wake that kid. You could go in there and hold a private Weird sisters concert and he’d sleep through the lot “ she played idly with a thread on his pyjama shirt and yawned again.

He ran his hand gently though her hair, pressing a kiss to her forehead and looking towards the Christmas tree. This would be the first Christmas Teddy would understand more. He was holding almost coherent conversations with his parents now and was understanding what Christmas meant- his Christmas list had been a hefty one.

“ what’re you smiling at? “ Dora asked quietly, brushing the backs of her fingers against his chin. He hadn’t even realised he had been smiling.

“ Christmas with Teddy “ Dora smiled too and laughed slightly.

“ poor kids gonna be upset when he realises we couldn’t get him a real pet hippogriff “

“ he’ll love the stuffed one just as much “ it had been a nightmare to wrap, it was bigger than Teddy himself “ he’ll understand things a little more this year and not just throw his mashed potatoes at your mother “ Dora snorted a laugh at the memory. She’d been in tears she’d found the situation that hilarious.

“ it’s a good job she loves him. Only grandchild perks? “ Remus smiled and pondered on what thing his son would do this Christmas to cause chaos, morphing into random things or deciding he wanted to climb everything within reach. He quite liked the chaos though, he’d loved boring and ‘normal’ for far too long. And you couldn’t get any less normal than a werewolf with his metamorphmagus wife and their half werewolf morphing son.

They stayed down stairs for a while longer, Dora still sat in his lap and a comfortable silence surrounding them. She dropped off again after a few minutes, her breathing become slower and her full weight leaning on him. He debated attempting to carry her up to bed, but wasn’t sure his aged bones could carry her. He struggled sometimes just lifting Teddy. So he simply stayed in the chair, rested his chin onto his wife’s head and closed his eyes, getting a little more sleep himself in the dying light of the fire.

[reveniemus]

Title: Lambskier in Comfort Minor, No 1

Prompt: Sept 21: There was only one bed (with a hint of Sept 15's Discrimination Against Witchers and Sept 19's Loss of Voice)

Pairing: Lambert & Jaskier, could be romantic if you squint

Rating: G

Warnings: None? Other than that it is unbeta'd af. Let me know if there is any I need to tag <3

@whataboutthebard | written for @natskier, who said "And if you want to write something, could I have some quiet cuddles in the dark? Don’t care whomst, don’t care if platonic or family or romantic, don’t care if they cant talk rn or just be comfortable with silent cuddles, but if you want to write and this strikes an idea at some point, I sure would love to read that" | thank you, @endrega23 for giving it a quick onceover <3 | on ao3!

It’s not true that witchers don’t feel. It’s a bald faced lie that was created to make it easy to hate witchers, to throw rotten vegetables at them and make them sleep with the livestock. Some witchers have learned to live with these misconceptions, happy to fake stoicism or politeness in the face of discrimination. He thinks, however, that if any humans met Lambert, they would change their tune quickly.

After having spent years traveling with Geralt, who said two words about anything good or bad, it was a culture shock for him to hear a litany of curses coming from the red headed witcher. Jaskier sits on the bed, watching Lambert pace through the room, anger seeping out of him as he rants about the town official who tried to cheat him out of his coin or the merchant who tried to sell him mediocre wares for luxury prices. Jaskier doesn’t even need to make any kind of noise or nod along to encourage him, he just emotes, his arms flailing and tensing as he punches his fist to his palm to avoid ruining the furniture at the inn.

Hilariously, the witcher doesn’t even flinch or stumble when Jaskier stands, walking over as Lambert continues his barrage of insults towards the town’s blacksmith and the stablemaster, who had given Lambert’s horse a dirty look upon realizing what he was. He barely takes a breath as Jaskier helps strip him of his armor, not even giving Jaskier a second look or following up on where the bard tucks away his swords (somewhere safe, but within easy reach always, Jaskier has picked up on habits universal to every witcher in his travels). It shows an insane amount of trust and it warms Jaskier’s heart more than he cares to admit.

Once Lambert is stripped of his armor, Jaskier takes his hand and tugs lightly. Lambert is still going, insulting the barkeep who tried to give him watered down ale, but his tone is less aggressive, less loud and he follows Jaskier without hesitation. Jaskier pulls back the covers and climbs into bed, tugging Lambert in beside him. The bed is only just barely big enough for two grown men — another slight towards witchers that the town has participated in — but it’s never bothered the bard before.

Lambert’s words trail off mid-sentence as Jaskier curls into him, head resting on his chest, just above his slow beating heart. He looks down at the bard, taking deep breaths to calm his mind. He hums as Jaskier’s fingers curl into the front of his shirt, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “Geralt mentioned this happens sometimes. You okay?” he asks, keeping his voice low.

Jaskier nods against his shirt, eyes closed and pressed close to Lambert. Even in the quiet of it, he can hear emotions in Lambert’s voice, softer this time, gentler than the rage he showed just moments before.

“Okay,” he whispers, shifting to snuff out the candle. He shifts again to wrap both arms around the bard, holding him close and Jaskier listens to his slow, even breathing, copying his rhythm.

Jaskier clings to Lambert, breathing in the scent of warmth and rosemary that seems to come naturally from the witcher. He thinks of how wary Lambert had been when Jaskier had first met the wolf, the way he wouldn’t take his eyes off the bard and the purposeful movements that kept his back away from him. It’s not easy out there for witchers, he knows that, and compared to what they have to go through, the things that plague Jaskier’s mind are hardly worth noting, and yet, they care. They let him ask questions and be as loud and obnoxious as he wants, but in the face of moments like this, where all Jaskier wants is to be held and to have no expectations placed on him, they’re right there too, making sure he’s safe, feels loved.

Even if Lambert’s breathing has evened out, Jaskier knows he’s in a state of meditation more than anything, so that if Jaskier needs him, he’s there, awake, alert, and ready to do whatever needs to be done. He slides his hand over the space above Lambert’s heart, a soft sigh escaping him as he snuggles in closer. The gentle squeeze of his shoulder is the last thing he consciously feels before falling asleep.

[sickleysweetbananabread]

Skin and bones

Chapter 1 (?)

You wake with a shout. You had promised yourself you weren't gonna go back there. *You lie to yourself. You cant go back there, it would ruin everything! *Nothing will change. You're stuck here forever. You have come to realise that these dreams are much better than being back there. You aren't back there anymore, now is different. *Don't let your efforts become a waste. You've changed. *You can't keep doing this, Y/N. You've grown. You're mature now.

*Sure you are.

The voice had croaked out from beside you, making you flinch. How long had they been there?! They nearly scared you half to death!

Their brown hair falls over their eyes. It does a good job of hiding the soft gaze they give you as you stretch and rub your eye crust away. You do end up catching them staring eventually though, to which they look away, whistling.

They sit up alongside you and you watch as they push themself up and out of your poorly made pillowfort, chortling to themselves as if theyve told the funniest joke known to man-kind.

"Oh har har," you groan, combing your hands through your h/c hair. You can see their eyes filled with amusement along the entrance of the blanket. Either your depressing attempt at sarcasm or your deadpan expression seems to make the ghost crack into a fit of maniacal cackles. They start to choke as you whine that it's only funny to them. In fact, it's so hilarious that you launch yourself further into your fort and promptly pretend to pout sullenly. So funny indeed. You make a grab at your phone a couple of times and finally manage to grab it. Your eyes water as you turn the device on. What the hell are they doing up at-

.

..

...

.....

"FOUR-THIRTY IN THE MORNING, ARE YOU SHITTING ME???"Cue the dramatic witch cackles.

Chara reaches back in the fort to take a cracker from the snack pile you both share and you swat at their hand. They take a hold of you and force you up and into the kitchen to make some food for yourself before you go out to work. They were always looking out for you. You hum, contemplating on what to make, muttering to yourself as you open spotify and choose a random song from your playlist. You stand there for a second, unsure of what to say, you were always awkward in the silence. Chara found it annoying at first but they managed to adapt for you, bringing up ideas such as headphones or movies before bed to keep you focused on that instead of silence.

*Need help with anything yet?

Red eyes peer at you from over the counter, they glaze at the sight of the chocolate brownie box you pull out and begin to read.

"Yeah, actually! Since today is a Thursday we are making some desserts to eat with our movie marathon later. Chara, could you be a doll and help me with grabbing the sugar and flour? I cant find my stool today," you sigh. Chara nods so fast that it becomes a blur of red and brown, which makes you laugh joyously. Grabbing a whisk, milk and a few more ingredients along the way. You add them bit by bit and you get Chara to help with the right measurements to make sure the brownies are perfect for both you and Charas standards. You start to think of the many recipes you could make when you get back home from work and you bring out a notebook and pen from a drawer and start writing.

*Dude, you're making me drool here. Can we please just make the brownies before i eat everything in this damn kitchen?! You have work today, don't you?

Speaking of work, you muse. You do happen to have work in a few hours. You work dayshift in a cafe a few blocks away. It was a place where you were at peace. Most days it was packed with many different types of people and the regulars. The noise was a little bit startling when you walk in at first, yes, but then you don't have to worry about overthinking what that old lady had said to you three weeks ago on the bus as you walked past her. You take the dessert out the oven.

Chara drools as they catch a glimpse of that oh-so-delicious masterpiece. They end up immediately cringing as you crack as many places in your body possible and sigh in relief. You laugh mischievously and they sprint into the livingroom and back into the fort.

"Im away to get dressed, knock if you need anything, god can't save you if i catch you anywhere near those brownies, Chara Dreemur,"

*God is dead, i killed him in his sleep.

*Jesus too.

A/N:

This is my first time ever trying to write a chaptered fanfic so lemme know what you think of it! I am sorry if i made any grammar errors as i am dyslexic lol. Which skeleton do you wanna meet first? 👀👀

[terriblenight]

This is right after Yuuri escaped to his room in ep 2.These are tears. What the fuck. You cant tell me that Victor didnt fall in love at the afterparty.

Actually i have a theory abt that.

They met at the after party. Obviously Yuuri romanced Victor and then fucking forgot. Then the airport scene - i dont think Victor thought of him as a fan. Do you think that being into this sport so long would make him not check his fucking opponents? There were just 5 of them!! Besides i think that was his way of saying "hi remember me? We can take a photo and then i can take your number so i could.. Hehe.. Send u the photo or something"

Then the fucking victors free program. I can write essays about this. He looks so sad there. So lonely. His movement are mainly hugging himself and reaching out. Just THINK! Its stated so many times in the show that skaters share emotions by skating. Our boy Victor, the biggest of simps, was sending a message. "I hope youre watching. Im still thinking about that night where i finally felt something, felt like im having fun. Here, im reaching out to you. Please give me a sign, any sign so we can at least talk from time to time. Im human and im very lonely".

AND THEN!!! THEN! yuuri did THAT. he recreated it. Well, he did it so he could feel a little better (besides: when Victor skates it hes in top shape and nails it all. Yuuri is depressed, out of shape and he still did that!!). The video accidentally went viral but Victor doesnt know. He thinks "oh my god. He is reaching out. And this boy is lost and lonely and talented and i wanna get to know him. He is a genius, why isnt he showing off, why is he hiding all this from the world? "

And he thinks. Really really hard even though he made up his mind after seeing that video. He doesnt have any idea how to surprise people anymore. He doesnt have any real competition. He is bored, he is losing his passion and the most important part - he is so lonely. And not gonna lie - i think after seeing that his crush turned from small to enormous

So hes like FUCK THIS SHIT my life couldnt get any fucking worse or more boring, and he flies to Japan. Hes excited, hes gonna get to know his crush and its gonna go smoothly, because of what happened at the party. So hes gonna have a great time and shake a skating world a little.

So here we are, he meets this boy that BEGGED HIM to be his coach, while being very close to half naked, and now hes scared to even talk to him. Victor doesnt know what the fuck is going on. Is it the way he approached him? Is it him? Did he not like what he saw at the onsen? Maybe he doesn like victor at all? Too bad, Victor is gone already and i dont know if he realizes it yet.

So he hugs his dog close and let himself cry a little.

What i meant is: Victor fell in love earlier than we thought for the most part of the show and it shows! The details are there and it makes it more hilarious, cause can you imagine? Hes simping over this boy and when he meets him hes being crushed but doesnt give up. He probably told himself that well maybe hes just playing hard to get, im gonna remind him how he wasnt all that at the party by giving him the most sexual program i could ever think of. He did touch Yuuri a lot. He said things.

And now imagine you do all this only to find out THE BOY DOESNT REMEMBER HOW YOU MET and that you came across as someone who bothered your husband so much he fell in love as well.

[actualbird]

// cn server spoilers and n/s//f///w text

so in the current winter event in the cn server, mc has to debate against HERSELF

i do not know any chinese but ive been told that the name says "Me/I" so like. kajdkskdfkkdkdo girlie is now fighting her inner demons

it's resulted in some pretty hilarious fanart but i wanna make this concept horny because of course i will. like....... shadow!mc ala persona 4 where ur shadow!self manifests and tells you your deepest darkest desires

and shadow!mc goes to mc and is like "deep down you wanna GET RAILED BY ALL THE NXX BOYS. U CANT LIE TO ME, I AM YOUUUUUU!!!"

and then somehow shadow!mc and mc end up fucking while shadow!mc is telling mc aaaaaaall about those dirty fantasies shes been having every night

im saying clonefucking, yes.

clonefucking while the topic of discussion is a gangbang.

i cant write this bc i feel this concept would shine best as a vaguely horror tinged smut. and if i write this, i'll ram it straight into the absurd comedy smut zone as i always do JDKKDKFKKDKD