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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago

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I've referenced before how I have a big google document to keep track of every media I've ever seen in my entire life (just for reference because I like to track everything possible lol… I am the Data Collector), but recently as I was updating it, I thought of actually evaluating them to find out random percentages (like for example, out of Total Shows Watched, what percentage did I finish vs. stop watching, what percentage did I like or dislike, etc.)...

Evaluating these things is made easier by the fact that I already place everything on each subsection of the list into 6 broad ranking categories, so I don't have to go back and guess to figure out how I feel about them or anything. The categories are: Ranking 5 - overall best* (despite some criticisms of course because I'm too much of an Analyzer to ever find anything Perfect lol) Ranking 4 - more positive than neutral, but not good enough to be 5 Ranking 3 - either the good + bad negate each other, OR it's just not memorable/interesting in any way enough to be ranked higher or lower (this is the Default category ALL things are placed in if no other rank applies) Ranking 2 - maybe a few redeemable elements but largely more negatives than positives Ranking 1 - So bad that it circles around to being fascinating to observe in some way (not necessarily Funny, or Good, but just interesting somehow) Ranking 0 - Bad in a genuinely frustrating or obnoxious manner

*("best" primarily defined here as most interesting, rather than most good in a technical sense, or some other measure. I tend to value more highly whether there's something novel or thoughtful about the worldbuilding, tone, writing, base premise, etc - than about whether it's actually executed perfectly.)

And here's the amount of shows that have so far been placed into each category -

TV shows ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 20 shows ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 28 shows ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 114 shows ~ Rank 2 (mid low) -33 shows ~ Rank 1 (low low but intriguingly so) - 14 shows ~ Rank 0 (iredeemably low) - 2 shows

This would make for a total of 211 TV shows overall. However, there are 57 shows within these list marked as "didn't finish" (typically meaning I quit on the very first or second episode - but log them still to keep a record that I at least had a brief view of them).

So my total of genuinely fully watched shows would be more 154. 211 Total, but a More Accurate Total of 154.

Counting them all and using the Total Number Of The List (211) -- that means roughly 9.5% of all total shows I have ever watched (or at least attempted to watch) have been Mostly Good, 13% have been Moderately Okay, 54% have been either entirely Forgettable or some mix of good + bad that lands them right in the Neutral Middle, 15.6% have been Mostly Bad, 6.6% have been Bad (but in an interesting way), and 0.9% have been Terribly Bad.

Additionally, I didn't even get past the first two episodes of about 27% of the total.

Sooo, discounting ones I didn't finish, my total TV shows ever watched in my life would be about 154 (maybe give or take a few, assuming I might have forgotten some from very long ago).

But instead of entire life, let's just say this is the total for 'About 20 Years' (so, not counting very early childhood when I likely wouldn't remember things I saw/have no detailed recollection of them (like for example, I'm sure at some point when I was like 4yrs old I must have seen an episode of Spongebob or something, but I have zero distinct memories of it, can't quote anything of it, and barely recall the premise - so I don't count it on the list, etc.)).

In that case, 154 divided by 20 would be roughly 7.7 shows a year.

Which is actually surprisingly low considering that I often have stuff on in the background for hours whilst I make sculptures and do costumes and stuff (maybe I should have also marked some distinction between 'things I fully paid attention to' and 'things I kind of half listened to whilst sculpting', but that would further split the categories too much probably lol), but I guess a lot of that is youtube videos or random documentaries, so .. eh.. maybe I get it being lower.

Now, doing the same thing for movies-

Movies ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 4 movies (3.4% of total) ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 12 movies (10.3% of total) ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 91 movies (78.4% of total) ~ Rank 2 (mid low) - 8 movies (6.8% of total) ~ Rank 1 (low but interesting) - 1 movie (0.8% of total) ~ Rank 0 (irredeemably low) - none in this category (0%)

That makes 116 for a Total (Actually Remembered) Movies Watched In Lifetime (Or At Least In 20 Years).

116 divided by 20 is roughly 5 or 6 movies a year (I feel this has probably been skewed though by adding everything since like elementary school onwards, as I remember a lot more movies from child/teen years.. Whereas, the past 3 years I feel like I've barely seen maybe even 5 movies?? lol). I also have "Didn't Finish" marked on 18 of them. Which means I quit halfway through about 15% of the total movies.

So, a for broader summary stuff..

I seem to be less forgiving to movies than tv shows, by far. Which makes sense to me, I guess, because I love elaboration and details, so "short form" things that only last an hour or two are often lost on me a bit. My biggest complaint with movies is indeed usually walking away just wishing there had been more exposition, more scenes where characters are doing nothing, more "mindless bantering" conversations, more Quiet Downtime and Lore Elaboration and so on lol, so... of course most 1-2hr films end up feeling a bit Not Enough To Draw My Interest/Nothingy to me.

If you count 5 and 4 as "like" and rankings 2 to 0 as "dislike", then for TV shows I at least somewhat liked 48 of them, and at least somewhat disliked 47 of them.. So it's almost exactly the same lol. I'm just about equally as likely to find something bad as I am to find something redeeming about it. But overall, the largest chance is that I just won't really care much for it at all and it will be tossed into the 'neutral' pile, forgotten forever. Movies have a bit better of a balance, "liking" 16 of them, and "disliking" only 9 of them. So I'm slightly more likely to enjoy a movie than to find it annoying - though still VASTLY more likely to just not find it anything in particular, possibly not even finishing it.

ANYWAY.. this is vague and literally pointless, but like I said, I just really find information fun. Like my document where I've rated every apple flavor I've ever tried (like 40 of them now?), or reviewed every oreo flavor (32?), or ranking data from my entire 10 years of Trying To Make Friends process (out of 100 people, roughly 8% chance of a moderate compatibility, 3% chance of high), or etc. etc.. I love to have random pointless things to analyze I suppose lol.

I doubt anyone tracks things in their life in this same exact way, but I'd be interested in hearing any at least somewhat similar data !!! (like, how many TV shows you watch a year on average, and what percentage of those you like vs. dislike (if you keep track of that sort of thing), etc.)). I guess it might be easier with movies, since I think some people use those websites where you curate a list of movies you've seen and you can rate them or something, so maybe the numbers are already available on those places. :0

#maybe this is my version of spotify wrapped lol.. Lifetime Media Google Doc Wrapped.. kind of.. except I'm not going over specific titles.#I can't do this with music since I rarely EVER look for new music or add to my Youtube To MP3 folder library as I just don't really #listen to music that often. When I'm working (the majority of when I seek background noise) I need like.. people's talking voices #for some reason. Just instruments and singing are not distracting enough to me to work as background noise because theyre #almost TOO in the background if that makes sense? like if I put music on then I just tune it out and it's virtually no different #than if I were daydreaming stream of consciousness thoughts in an entirely quiet room lol. And I can't really do it with books since #essentially 100% of what I read is non-fiction. usually about some specific subject or academic topic OR stuff like #1800s magazines or cookbooks or historical people's diaries. Which is not really.. the type of thing I would #rank as easily I guess? like 'ooh yeah putting the sociology textbook in my top 5 hee hee right next to the 1920s radio recipes book' lol.#Then for games... I just sadly dont play enough of them. I've been banned from new games as I've told myself I cant play anyting #long form (no rpgs or etc) until I actually finish MY OWN game first - to keep me from wasting time. so on average #I play... 0 new games a year. ToT... I do play the sims sometimes but that's really all (which is not a new game at all since #I've been playing it on and off for years). Thus I guess movies/TV are really the only things that make sense #to collect this sort of information on. I could do youtube videos I guess also but that seems kind of strange like...#giving a rating to every single video I watch in a ranked list lol.. Especially since I would say a good 85% of the time #they are exclusively background noise whilst I'm working on something or cleaning the house or etc. and not things I pay serious attention #to. There are only a few specific topics/types/creators of videos I watch where I'm ACTUALLY sitting in front of a screen paying #direct attention to the content (usually when it's educational or political things). Everything else is too mindless to even rank.#ANYWAY... ever analyzing my little hermit Weird Relationship To Media (in the sense of seemingly not processing or getting the same #things out of it as many other seem to). I think that can contribute sometimes to the whole difficulty socializing and stuff #since our culture is very centered around media consumption generally speaking. People want to talk about The New Movie that came #out or The Big TV Show Of The Year. and for me it's like.. highly likely I just plain have NOT seen it. Or if i have. statistically #I most likely was entirely ambivalent if not slightly negative towards it lol. Which just kind of takes the steam out of a 'fun' 'casual'#conversation and you seem like a bit of a bummer if most of your only feedback is either 'idk what that is' or 'oh yea... i did #see that one.... i didnt like it all that much though... I think it'd be better with elves in it.. and 7 hours longer..'' lol..#Which I am not disliking things in a 'grr i hate it bc its popular'/just to be contrarian way. I actually dislike that mindset/find it #silly (by striving so hard to be counterculture you are thus still defining yourself by the whims of external culture - just in the #opposite direction. but are still just as preoccupied with the mainstream (going against it) as everyone else. etc. lol..)) In my #case I think it IS just having niche hyperspecific tastes.. for example- it peeves me when cell phones are in media bc I dont want to be #reminded at ALL of the real world. so.. cross off anything set in modern times. so on & etc. Judging all things by these weird criteria lol

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goldeneyedgirl · 2 months ago

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Ficmas2024 Day 1: Cowboys & Witches Verse Discontinued Sequel

Happy Holidays and welcome to this year's edition of Ficmas! I swear to god, this is upon me faster every single year. Requests are staying open this year, so if you still have something you're dying to see, now is the time to abuse my ask box.

Today's offering is the original draft of the sequel to Love & Duty, the verse second most in need of some heavy editing and rewrites. When I was asked for Solstice, I decided that it was a much more interesting and fun sequel and this kind of sat in a corner of my writing folder. This takes place roughly a year after Love & Duty

There's a good chance I will repurpose aspects of this version into a future installment of Love and Duty, but for now, this is what we have. I hope you like it!

untitled love & duty sequel.

Time meandered on.

More vampire raids were happening up and down the border, though no news came from Del Rio, much to Alice's secret relief. But the raids were bad - three Guardian Houses were lost entirely, with the survivors decamping for Houston with horror stories and gruesome war wounds. The dead were left behind, without a chance for a blessing or the final rites, something that left everyone on edge.

The aunts tried to disguise their worry but failed miserably; soon Alice was diverted from battling the hemlock and the blackberries, and assisting with the near constant creation of blessing amulets and charms, of memorising protective spells, and strengthening shields and protection around the property.

It was stressful and exhausting. But it distracted her. That was important - mooning over Jasper Whitlock-Hale was a pointless waste of energy, and she would get over whatever it had been. She had had a crush, and he had mistaken his gratitude with lust. Nothing else. She was, in all probability, never going to see him again.

It had been almost a year since Del Rio - she had tucked all thoughts of the cowboy in a corner of her mind that only came out when she was getting ready to sleep. She knew what would happen if the aunts found out; a lecture about the isolation and loneliness of Laredo twisting up her mind, and a lot of tasks around the house to get her mind off something as silly and frivolous as a boy.

But the nights she drifted off thinking about Jasper's smile, and the warmth of the Del Rio house kitchen, were the nights that she managed to sleep the best.

And then there was a raid in Laredo proper.

Evidently a messy attempt to locate the Guardian House that brought her and the aunts straight into town, to spend most of the night and an entire day posing as nurses to aid with the injured in town. She’d stitched and bandaged and made endless cups of tea, and secretly created dozens of blessed salt lines. They rarely did much to vampires on the hunt, but they could disrupt or conceal a scent trail. Every little bit would help until the Council figured out why the raids were happening and send out scouts.

All four of the Laredo witches arrived home at dusk, physically and mentally exhausted. Blood stained their clothing, their supplies were low, and there was nothing else for it - they all needed a wash, some toast and tea, and then a whole night sleeping. It was a relief that the aunts didn’t expect her to put in a full night’s work, and she took her time in the bath before preparing for bed. Two of the cats - Ginseng and Yarrow - were curled up on her bed, warm and purring. It was very peaceful and comforting after such a long day and that... that should have been the first warning, to not let her guard down.

It was a child's lesson, truly: be prepared for the worst. Sleep in shifts, close together. Update and info the Council. Summon assistance. Especially after a raid that size, with so many dead. They'd had to burn so very many bodies, because their wounds were too great to decipher a changing bite from the... mutilation before them.

But they were all so tired and really, what was the harm of one night's sleep...

Famous last words.

—

Alice slept deeply, better than she had in a long time, sandwiched between the two cats. Her dreams were all of the sun, standing in the grass.

Or she was until the screaming started, and suddenly she was awake and being torn away from her bed.

“Alice?”

Oh.

It was Jasper. In person. Staring down at her in the thin light of her room looking so very out of place.

A whole year older. She wasn't sure if he'd managed to get even taller, or if it was because he was there in person. His hair was longer, tied off his face, and there was a row of clumsy stitches across his cheek. His clothing was filthy, and he was laden down with weapons as he clasped her tightly against him, closing the door without making a sound.

“Alice, quick,” Jasper murmured, keeping both eyes on the bedroom door.

“Jasper, what’s going on?” she asked, her voice still heavy with sleep, and becoming more and more aware with every passing moment that she was standing there in her very thin nightgown in a very cold room, in front of a man she hadn’t been able to get out of her head.

“Maria Moreno’s coven are here,” he murmured. “They've been looking for you and the aunts, and they found you. We heard the rumours and we... we thought we could get you out, but we're too late."

"She's in my house?" The blood drained from her face, and her knees nearly buckled. Maria Moreno, one of the most infamous and murderous of the Southern vampires, and leader of one of the most formidable armies. The previous day’s slaughter in Laredo had just been her search for the witches. What Maria was truly capable without the presence of the Guardian Houses was something Alice could even picture.

“Get your boots, a coat, we have to leave immediately,” Jasper said, whispering so quietly they were more like puffs of air. “The traps are set, we can still get away clean.”

Alice nodded, and grabbed her dress from where she had tossed it over a chair, pulling it on over her nightgown without a second thought, and tugging on her socks and boots. “What about the animals? The aunts?” she whispered, as she carefully shooed both cats out of her window; they were sensible creatures, they would get themselves away smartly. Cats hated vampires.

“Peter and Emmett are trying to get them out,” Jasper said. “Come on.”

They slipped out of her room, and crept down the hallway, Alice freezing behind Jasper when she heard a scream, shuddering as it cut away suddenly.

One of the aunts, most certainly; Alice's stomach twisting at the cold realisation.

A cat streaked past them, dashing down the stairs, and Alice hoped that it - Clover, she thought - made it to safety. She hoped all of them did.

“Hello Jasper.”

The words were like a thunderclap in the house. Sensual and almost mocking, both she and Jasper froze up as the woman stepped out from a room at the opposite end of the hallway.

Alice had only ever seen pictures of Maria Moreno, and they did her no justice - she was so much more beautiful and terrible in real life. Her dark hair was arranged elaborately, with loose curls spilling over both shoulders; her red and black gown made of worn but expensive fabrics. And she was gorgeous, with a beauty that was awe-worthy, right down to the blood smear across her face.

The most dangerous woman in Texas, if not the world.

“And the little baby witchling. The very last of the Benoit line. Isn’t she pretty,” Maria cooed, stepping forwards. “Perhaps we can come to an arrangement.”

“An arrangement?” Jasper said, his hand tight around Alice’s.

“You and your friends leave right now - I’ll even let you take the horses - and I won’t follow. I’ll stay here and get to know the witchling here, and her governesses,” Maria said, sounding very reasonable. “Or you can try and leave, and I will kill every person on this property, and then go straight to Del Rio for your sister and the little pregnant woman. Rosalie would make an exquisite addition to my army, I’m sure.”

Jasper actually growled at her, and reached behind him to pull a shotgun free from the strap on his back.

“You’ll let us pass, Maria,” he said darkly. “You’ll crawl back into whatever hole you came out of, and stay the hell out of Texas. That’s not negotiable, and it never will be.”

Maria began to laugh but was cut off by Jasper firing the gun once, twice, three times. Whatever it was loaded with glowed faintly blue and knocked Maria clear off her feet and through a wall.

“Run,” he told Alice, half-pushing her down the stairs.

And she tried, stumbling in the darkness and wondering if this was just a terrible dream.

As she reached the door, she heard Jasper yell out and she turned to see Maria had caught him on the landing. Grasping him around the throat, she held him in the air effortlessly, as he clawed at her grip.

But she was not unmarked from the shotgun - there were gouges across her chest and throat, the right side of her face looked like raw meat, weeping a yellowy fluid with blue bruise-like marks at the edges.

She looked like the monster she was and somehow, she was still beautiful.

“Oh Jasper, it’s been so long. We could have been together nearly a year by now, yes, nearly a year. You’d be a glorious addition,” Maria sighed. “We could rule Texas together, mijo. Just say the word”

Alice stared at him as he dangled there; he wouldn’t be able to breathe.

And then Maria’s words began to sink in. A year. A year...

“A year? You… you were the one that did that to him?” Alice turned around.

“Oh, that’s sweet. She’s stayed behind for you. She could already be escaping,” Maria laughed. “I have no use for her, but it’s very cute.”

“You ripped him open,” Alice continued, staring up at Maria.

“Well, Jasper decided not to accept my very kind invitation,” Maria said, “and that offended me quite badly. I’m surprised you lived - was that your doing, witchling? I’ve heard of Laredo’s skill with healing.”

Alice stared at Maria and Jasper. She thought of the silence upstairs, the certainty that at least one of the aunts was dead, if not all of them. The women that took her in and raised her the best way that they knew how, when her own parents cast her out and rewrote history to erase her.

She thought of the hours nursing Jasper, of the wound on his torso, and all the bite scars; of how sweet he'd been to her, how he'd come all this way to save her from the very person who'd tried very, very hard to kill him and nearly succeeded. And put his family in danger for his efforts.

The rage and frustration and grief all bubbled over.

The curse was an early defensive spell, crude but extremely effective. As she spits out the words at the viper on the stairs, she makes the slashing gesture at Maria, Maria has no chance. She drops Jasper and hits the wall limply, her eyes wide and fixed on Alice as the curse takes effect.

Jasper fell to the floor choking and gasping, but already trying to get to his feet. He half-falls down the stairs but manages to gain his wits long enough to grab Alice's hand and pull her out of the house so fast that she's nearly pulled off her feet.

“She won’t stay down for long, we need to get clear,” he said, as they tore across the yard towards the barn. “That was really damned stupid, you should have run.”

“She was going to kill you!” Alice snapped, as they arrived in the barn. Both Hallow and Haven were saddled, and Peter was waiting.

“Sybil and Emmett are off,” Peter said grimly. “They took Duke, we’ve got Hallow.”

“Where’s Bandit?” Jasper asked, tightening the saddles.

“Emmett took him. I’ll ride with Alice,” Peter said.

“Alice’ll come with me - Haven won’t be fast enough with two riders,” Jasper said firmly, boosting Alice into the saddle and easily swinging himself behind her. “We need to go, now.”

“The aunts, did they get out?” Alice burst out, and Peter mounted Haven.

“Sybil did,” Peter said with finality. “She’ll be pleased to see you - they were all determined to see you safe, witchling. We need to go, now.”

With Jasper’s arms tight around her, clutching the reins, Hallow and Haven took off like Alice had never seen them, as if they understood the severity of the situation.

Maybe they did.

“What about the cats?” Alice cried out as they passed beyond the boundary line. Ginseng, Yarrow, Ginko, Clover, Lobelia, Arnica, and Nettle. They had been her constant companions for years, dear things, and they didn’t deserve to die this way.

“We’ll come back for the damn cats,” Jasper snapped as they came over the hill, where two figures on horseback waited under a tree. “Sybil, now!”

Aunt Sybil, who looked small and frail nodded, and murmured something under her breath and there was a boom that nearly flung Alice from the saddle. She jerked around to catch a glimpse of the Laredo Guard House as it burst into green flames that seemed to almost be alive as they crawled over everything that was there, and Alice felt the tears on her cheeks as the small party tore away from the wreckage.

All of it, gone. Perhaps Maria would perish in the fire, but the thought of that didn't help. All she can do is turn around and surreptitiously wipe away her tears before anyone notices.

—

It's a long journey to Del Rio, especially at night. It's mostly silent, with Jasper and his friends relying on runes to communicate, rather than draw attention by speaking out loud.

Alice's not sure if she sleeps or if she passes out, but she becomes aware of the rocking motion of the horse, and that she’s slumped into the crook of Jasper’s arm. She's warm, and he smells safe - like sunbaked dirt and salt and tea leaves. And even though she's embarrassed, she's so very tired, and it feels unnecessary to open her eyes... she had already been drained when she cursed Maria, and … she needed to sleep.

So she did.

—

It takes them two days to get back to Del Rio, as Jasper leads them on a winding trail designed to confuse Maria and keep them safe. The first morning she only wakes when Jasper and Peter are lifting her from the horse, and she is quite embarrassed when she has to reassure them that she is unharmed, only tired.

There is a third man, built like a bear, with curly black hair and kind eyes, that has set a small bonfire - one with lemon-coloured flames that doesn’t smoke and will offer them some small amount of protection as they rest and eat. His name is Emmett, and he is married to Jasper’s sister. Prolific with a shotgun, and a fair rider, he had been the one to get Sybil out in one piece, and visibly regretted failing the other two aunts.

Aunt Agnes and Aunt Enid. She should use their names, they had been good to her. Raised her well and prepared her for everything they could. They had died, and she had lived, and the guilt weighed heavily on her.

Sybil held her tightly when she made her way over; the old woman was wearing only her nightdress and dress coat buttoned tight. She felt very small and breakable when she warpped her arms around Alice, and looked very day of her age as she inspected Alice.

“I am so very, very glad to see you, little one,” she murmured. “I prayed to the goddess you would come away safe, and you did.”

“I’m sorry,” Alice sniffled. “Enid and Agnes…”o

“We are - were - just a bunch of old women clattering about a rotting house. Our lives have been lived, and they would hoave considered their lives for yours a worthy trade. Everything has a price that has to be paid,” Sybil says, smoothing Alice’s hair back.

Alice nodded, sniffling.

“Good girl,” Sybil sighed. “You need to eat something.”

The food the men carried was basic - bread, dried meat, and water. It was enjoyable but Alice kept her plate on her lap to distract herself as the others spoke over her head. She listened half-heartedly, until one word caught her attention.

“We’re going to Houston?” Alice looked at Sybil with wide eyes. “Houston?”

“Until we can rebuild the Laredo House, yes, I will go to Houston. I have my sister and my nieces there,” Sybil said calmly. “You have been invited to take a position at Del Rio.”

Alice blinked. "Without you?"

Sybil smiled wistfully. “Yes. Perhaps, if we can rebuild Laredo, we might both return there one day - if I am still able. But until then, I will be safe with my family in Houston. Your presence will be appreciated in Del Rio.”’

Alice nodded and refocused on her food. Why on earth would she be needed at Del Rio? They needed a healer, yes, but she hadn't taken her oaths and knew nothing about the male Guard Houses. And invited by whom?

Her gaze lifted to look at Jasper on the other side of the fire, but Jasper seemed very intent on his rations, and Emmett was watching Jasper.

“Charlotte’s having a baby,” Peter blurted out suddenly.

“Oh! Congratulations,” Alice pasted a smile on her face. A competent - if reluctant - midwife she could be. It was her least favourite duty, and the one that the aunts had once despaired she would ever manage. But it was reason enough to be invited to Del Rio.

“We’re very excited,” Peter was talking very fast. “Though I think Rosalie is even more excited.”

Rosalie and Emmett. More people at the Guard House. In her mind, it was always just Peter and Charlotte, and Jasper. It was oddly overwhelming.

“We need to get moving,” Jasper interrupted. “We’ve got awhile to go, and you need to be on the road to Houston by dusk. We’ve lingered long enough.” He began extinguishing the fire, and Alice watched as Peter and Emmett exchanged a look.

Whatever was going on, she was sure they’d fill her in soon.

—

By the time they arrived at the Del Rio House, Alice had never been so grateful to not be traveling - she couldn’t walk in a straight line, she’d been on horse back so long.

The Del Rio house was a cheery as ever, as Alice was escorted inside. She could smell something baking, and fresh flowers sat on the table in the entrance. It was exactly how she pictured it, but it was very hollow now she was here in person.

“Alice! Oh, you came!” Charlotte appeared in the doorway, a pistol loose in one hand. "Are you all okay?"

Peter shook his head. “Enid Benoit and Agnes Beaumont didn’t survive,” he said grimly. “But we got Alice and Sybil, and both of the horses.”

“A good result,” Jasper sighed, rubbing his hand over his face.

“Better than we feared,” Charlotte said, smiling sadly. “Come and eat.”

The table was set with food, and there was a beautiful blonde woman waiting in the kitchen, who immediately greeted Emmett with a kiss.

“My sister, Rosalie,” Jasper said, as they crowded around the table. “She came here to keep Charlotte company whilst we were gone.”

“You must be the Alice I’ve heard so much about,” Rosalie said politely.

“Hello,” Alice managed, half collapsed in her chair. Everything about the last few days get quite surreal. She would give anything to be back in Laredo, battling the hemlock and talking to the cats right now.

“You look quite pale, Alice, would you like some rest before you eat?” Charlotte looked worried.

“Yes. Yes, I think that would be good,” Alice managed.

“The guest room at the top of the stairs, let me show you,” Charlotte said, moving to stand.

“I remember, Charlotte,” Alice smiled. “Please, don’t trouble yourself. Thank you all, but I’ll excuse myself for now.”

The guest room was just as nice as it had been the first time, with towels and a nightgown laid out, so that she could once again wash and exchange the other clothing she owned for borrowed garments that didn't fit her right. It was all exactly how she pictured it.

And she hated all of it.

Washing herself mechanically, changing into the too-long nightgown, Alice curled up in the middle of the bed, and buried her face into the pillow to weep for everything that she had lost, and for the very sudden and inescapable realisation that she was now completely, and utterly alone in the world.

#ficmas24 #my fic: love and duty #my fic: cowboy-verse #alice cullen #jasper hale #sequel to love and duty #tempted to make the 'aunts' the queens of volterra tbh #things would get better!#but i think that the solstice fic is way more fun #and i want to play with this verse more before i burn it to the ground #jasper spends months trying to figure out how to harm himself enough alice has to come back but not enough its actually dangerous #absolutely delighted when peter and charlotte get pregnant because he knows JUST who to invite to help them with the baby #jokes on them alice would rather amputate 40 limbs and burn 100 bodies than deliver one baby #i love how in this verse alice's gift has come up 0 times #it absolutely has to since its a Big Deal

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