#THIS ABSOLUTE MALARKEY

[bitterkarmaa]

I return to- uh-

Wait what the fuck

[whollyjoly]

MoreLarkey + names

Vote for Donald Malarkey x Alton More in Round 2!

bonus:

[mavuikas-w1fe]

My opinion on all the skins from the new marvel season

Gwenpool: I think she looks awesome! I love her suitless casual style! Confession: I only know who she is because of Lego Marvel superheroes 2.

War Machine: to completely honest, I do not care about war machine. He's a cool character, don't get me wrong, but to me he just... Exists. But the fortnite skin is amazing, especially the alternate style.

Peelverine: do I really need to explain why I like peelverine? He looks absolutely incredible, and the X-Force style looks just as good!

Emma Frost: mommy? Sorry, mommy? Sorry, mommy? Sorry-

Yeah I'm in love already. New f/o alert. She's definitely not replacing Antonia, but I'm definitely gonna use her in game a lot.

Captain Jones: I feel like he's either gonna be absolutely iconic, or he's gonna be forgotten by the next season. I think he looks very cool, and I already feel like my brother is gonna really like him.

Mysterio: I've been calling him Jake Gyllenhaal. His secondary style is even a reference to all too well (ten minute version)!* Jokes aside, epic did a really good job making it look comic accurate, and the secondary style looks really cool

*because all too well (ten minute version) was released in the red era

Shuri: I'm gonna go on a rant here.

Shuri looks awesome, she's one of my favourite marvel characters and I'm so happy that she's in fortnite, but she should not have been the tier 100. The season is called absolute DOOM. Doom should've been the tier 100, not shuri. But putting that aside, I think she looks incredible, and I'm definitely gonna use the skin.

Last but not least, Doom.

He looks awesome, I'm not gonna lie. But he shouldn't have been the secret skin. Making people wait for the namesake of the season is a bad move on epic's part. Here's what I think they should've done.

They should've made peelverine the tier 1, then have doom as the tier 100 and gwenpool as the secret skin. But that's just my opinion.

[pastlivesandpurplepuppets]

As we regrouped for the push to Noville, word spread about Dike freezing up in the heat of battle. It didn’t surprise me. From the get-go, I’d been unimpressed with the midlevel officers and their inability to lead when they needed to. It was the only weakness in the 506th, this revolving door of guys who had no business being in charge. Sobel. Evans. Peacock. Dike. Compton’s lieutenant who turned to mush in Holland. A couple of rookies at Hell’s Corner who Winters had to take out because they had no idea where our machine-gun positions were in relation to our defensive posture. Was it because the ROTC programs back in the States didn’t do a better job of weeding them out? Because too many guys just didn’t have their hearts in it, just wanted an extra fifty bucks a month? Or because of politics, some higher-up’s “golden boy”—Dike comes to mind—getting foisted on soldiers who deserved better? Hard to say. All I know is that, at times, Easy Company succeeded not because of the leadership but in spite of it. Oh, we had a few good ones: Harry Welsh, Bob Brewer, even Ron Speirs, despite his “killer” reputation. First Lt. Thomas Meehan, who’d taken over for Sobel, was a good man, but his plane had gone down in Normandy. Dick Winters, who replaced him, was a glowing exception, too; he had that uncommon blend of smarts and concern for the guys. Cool as a cucumber when the pressure was on. Fair to all. And comfortable enough being Dick Winters that you never got the idea he had to stomp on the rest of us to boost his own battle-scarred ego. And he was absolutely willing to go through whatever we went through; hell, I always thought he was happiest when he was with us in the foxholes. I don’t think he did ever completely adjust to being in the rear, out of the action. He wanted to be out there with us. And, in a sense, he was.

~ Don Malarkey

[madlad-link]

Asami was losing her mind in the background also

[pandor-pandorkful]

Not exactly gender equality and I know it chafes some folk, but I'll never get enough of rough and buff fantasy barbarian action gals and their dainty and delicate man-princess pals (who are plagued by visions and prone to swooning and accidental bdsm encounters with the local nonbinary wizards and genderfluid mad scientists. :3c)

[alighted-willow]

I aspire to approach new words with the same zest and enthusiasm.

[stopallsnowblind]

Somebody tell me w h y this is what I saw when my kid asked to smell the wax melts at the store

Yankee Candle has got some ‘splainin to do 😅🫣

[oliverkingoftrash]

So you’re telling me she took a Louisville slugger to both head lights, slashed a hole in all tires, and carved her names into his leather seats,, and his car alarms DIDNT GO OFF????!??!

[aleister-carpathia]

I don't post much about my life all that often, but I feel the need to talk about personal life things for a moment. Don't worry too much, not trying to be doomy gloomy. Just gotta get things off my chest for a moment.

I was recently given instructions to participate in One Night Ultimate Mulbruk Simulator (which is my joke term for a sleep study) and got full confirmation that I have one of the most clear-cut cases of sleep apnea the tech had ever seen.

And now I have to do it again, this time with a CPAP machine.

Look, if it means an actual restful sleep I'll take it. I can't remember the last time I actually slept a full night's worth. It's drastically taken its toll on my mental well being and my energy.

I miss live streaming, even if I don't know what to stream anymore. I know I never had a big crowd or following but I was having fun. Even if it could also be anxiety inducing sometimes, I realize now that if I'm having fun, that's all that really matters. Technical issues be damned lol.

My only current event relevant remark: Palworld is Survival/Crafting with Creature Capturing, not Creature collection with survival aspects. Though you can focus on either one really. It's still fun no matter how you look at it. If anything, I hope it shakes Gamefreak AND Wild Card awake to be better devs. Is that not the goal of competing in the same space? Won't hold my breath about it though. Either way, thanks, Game Pass for letting me try it.

On the note of games, I can finally add Final Fantasy 2 to the list of Completed Games. Time has been overly harsh on this game, and most injustly so. It dared to be different, kinda like me. While that difference is not for everyone, I found it interesting. And considering thanks to the Dissidia games I was picturing Johnny Yong Bosch every time Firion speaks, it was glorious. There were some story hangups, but otherwise had fun with it. Now to save up for some art of Leila, Ricard, and Gordon...

Other than this, I am just floating on, enduring winter and the drop in mood it brings, and contuing to game, in hopes to find something to fully rekindle that flame within.

If you made it this far, you're a real one, and thank you.

May fortune smile upon the road ahead of you.

[whollyjoly]

orange blood dripping from the sun / tell me you're the one

MoreLarkey x Orange Blood by Mt. Joy (x)

[glendylucast]

Breaking Point, but it's manga cover

Donald Malarkey and Warren "Skip" Muck

Carwood Lipton (Happy belated birthday sir!)

I don't think the cover should give an obvious spoiler so Lipton will absolutely be first pick...

And Malarkey cover is actually continuity from this (missing 2 pages, maybe I'll do it, maybe I wont)

Pain below the cut

Happy forever 22nd birthday, Skip

[mavuikas-w1fe]

I was so surprised to find this song in one of the xhs Minecraft videos lol, I was not expecting a worship song

[pastlivesandpurplepuppets]

Here's to the ones that we got

Cheers to the wish you were here, but you're not

'Cause the drinks bring back all the memories

Of everything we've been through

Toast to the ones here today

Toast to the ones that we lost on the way

'Cause the drinks bring back all the memories

And the memories bring back, memories bring back you

There's a time that I remember when I did not know no pain

When I believed in forever and everything would stay the same

Now my heart feels like December when somebody says your name

'Cause I can't reach out to call you, but I know I will one day, yeah

Everybody hurts sometimes

Everybody hurts someday, ayy-ayy

But everything gon' be alright

Go and raise a glass and say, ayy

There's a time that I remember when I never felt so lost

When I felt all of the hatred was too powerful to stop (Ooh, yeah)

Now my heart feel like an ember and it's lighting up the dark

I'll carry these torches for ya that you know I'll never drop, yeah

"He was closer than a brother to me."

[darklydeliciousdesires]

Tiny Shelby Feet - A John Shelby/Reader Short Story.

Just a fluffy lil' short that came to me this morning, besties. Hope you love it :)

Words - 700

Warnings - None. Fluff a' plenty!

“You alright, sweetheart?” 

No, you absolutely are not alright. And it’s all his fault.  

Being angry at him isn’t an option, though, because he’s always so good to you. Hell, it was him being very good to you that got you into this in the first place, your stomach swollen and rounded with the next Shelby offspring due to arrive into the family in the next couple of days.  

You toss and turn a little more, albeit slowly, heaving your bulk to lie on your back. “I can’t get comfortable.”  

“Bet ya can’t, bab. Can’t even imagine what it’s like,” he speaks softly, removing one of the pillows from beneath his head. “Lift up.” Pushing yourself up, he slides it beneath your lower back, the downy plumpness soothing against your aching back. “What is it like, though? Is there anything it’s similar to that I’d understand?” 

It’s sweet of him to even want to try and comprehend the feeling of being pregnant, at least. “Imagine if somebody gave you a gallon of Epsom salts and sewed your arsehole up.”  

His eyes bulge. “Jesus fuckin’ wept. That don’t sound like fun.” Those eyes continue to widen when he sees you beginning to wince through gritted teeth. “Ain’t coming, is he?”  

“No, no it’s a cramp in my thigh.” 

“Left or right?” 

“Left.” Your instruction has him reaching beneath the bedcovers, beginning to massage said thigh, the tightened muscles finally relenting within the grasp of his warm, skillful hands. Bloody John Shelby and his skillful hands. Again, it’s how you ended up like this in the first place. “Okay, that’s better now. Thanks, love.” 

He props himself up on an elbow, hand lovingly stroking your bump, smiling as he feels his unborn child wriggling beneath his palm. You still remember the day you felt those first kicks, running down to the betting shop and grabbing his hand so he could feel them, too. You’ll never forget how lit up he looked at the sensation of tiny feet nudging against his big hand. “Who do you think he’ll look like most, you or me?” 

You can’t help yourself. “Me, hopefully.” 

“Oi, you cheeky mare!” Desired effect achieved. “I suppose it’d be better. I know I’m handsome, but we don’t want two freckled ginger nuts in the house.” 

“I really hope she has your hair, and your freckles,” you speak, putting extra emphasis on the word she. ”You know I love your freckles." 

“Fuck off,” he mutters, batting your hand away from where your finger trails over his shoulder. 

“Oi, no violence! I’m carrying your daughter!” 

“Son!” he corrects with a pointed finger. “You’re carrying me son. No girls, they’re too much headache for my liking.”  

“Poor thing’ll likely never see the outside of the house until she’s eighteen,” you chuckle, stroking your bump lovingly. 

He snorts, curling his lip slightly. “And the fucking rest! Ain’t having no boys round her, oh no, none of that malarkey.” He then lifts his chin a little, nodding to your rounded belly. “That is if it’s even a girl in the first place, and I’m still saying it’s a boy.”  

You smile, your eyes growing tired, yawning right on cue. Finally comfortable, you’re able to settle, drifting off to the rhythmic stroke of John’s hand over your belly. He thinks you’ve nodded off, unaware that you can hear every word he whispers to your unborn child.  

“Don’t even matter to me, you know, what you are,” he speaks softly, leaning to lay a kiss just above your protruded belly button. “I’ll love you until the last beat of my heart. I will. Anything you want, it’s yours. You ain’t gonna grow up poor and scratching around to make ends meet like we all had to. I’m gonna be a proper dad to you, little’un.” 

You can feel a lump in your throat form thickly, smiling on the inside as you drift into slumber. It’s nothing compared to two days later, though, when you see John holding your newborn son in his arms for the first time, his eyes filled with happy tears. Or, when five minutes later, you birth the twin sister nobody knew you carried, too.  

[luminouslywriting]

Can I request a BOB headcanon where you haven't been sleeping well recently and the boys begin to notice that you're a bit sleep deprived, please?

^^Gif is not mine and belongs to yourspeirs^^

A/N: Hello darling! This is a great request and I'm super excited to get this out to you guys! School started today, I got to wear my vintage 1955 lipstick that I ordered, and I'm chillin! So enjoy!

Dick Winters:

-Honestly, he probably clocks it before you even realize that the exhaustion is setting in. He's someone who pays close attention to the little things and is going to encourage you to get some rest.

-And yes, this may be given in the form of an order if you don't listen to him at first

-But if he also realizes that you're having a hard time sleeping, he's going to have a few good ol' home remedies for such a situation

-There's this wonderful tea that he makes (if the resources are available), and it absolutely helps you relax right before you go to sleep. He's also more than happy to talk to you about plans for the future as you try to fall asleep if that will help.

Lewis Nixon:

-Haha, he's not getting any good rest either. But worry not, he's got a great solution 👀

-Yes, it's literally just: "You're having trouble sleeping? I'm having trouble sleeping? The solution clearly is that we sleep together. But literally, just sleep."

-He's a chronic cuddler and this is a great way for you to get comfortable and relax. If not, he's also more than happy to look for alternative means

-Otherwise, get comfy as he doesn't like to let go until late morning haha

Ronald Speirs:

-Is probably too busy to notice?? At least at first. If it's to a point that he's noticing it, then it's probably a definite problem and he's definitely going to just give you an order to go to sleep.

-And yes, he'd go to your superior officers about it or even to the medics and order you to have a nap

-He's not above using his position to ensure that you get the proper rest that you need

-Speirs cares...it's just in his own way and that means that he's going to do whatever it takes to ensure that you're feeling better :)

Buck Compton:

-Someone who picks up on it pretty quickly and gently prods about it. He's got all sorts of stories that he remembers from his history and literature classes in college that he can tell you about while you're trying to fall asleep

-He's also pretty attentive to figuring out if it's a noise issue or a light issue and finding ways to block out sound or help with the light.

-He's going to check in and make sure that the sleep is getting better and this is something that continues well after the war

-He remembers the little things :)

Carwood Lipton:

-A mother hen about the entire thing—he's out here clocking immediately that you're exhausted and not looking too good. He's worrying incessantly.

-He's not going to overstep his boundaries...but he might kindly suggest that you speak to the medics or to a superior officer about catching a few hours of rest

-Will check back in with you to see if you were able to rest. If you were, then great. If not...then he's going to be pulling out all the stops and is going to come and lay by you until you fall asleep.

-Literally the sweetest man to go to if you're sleep deprived.

Joe Liebgott:

-Doesn't really realize that it's a problem until you're probably swaying on your feet

-It's at this point that he's going to gracefully guide you over to a cot or somewhere that you can nap and is going to sweet talk you into getting the rest that you need

-Wants to know why you didn't tell him that you haven't been sleeping well lately....he just wants you to be okay and well rested

-Also might bribe you with some slightly dirty promises haha

Donald Malarkey:

-Has clocked this a while ago and is just patiently waiting for you to realize that you need to get some rest. He's very respectful of boundaries and wants you to make your own decisions.

-Is not above stealing some chocolate to bribe you into taking a nap haha

-Absolutely the type to encourage you to count sheep or stars to try and help you fall asleep

-Also a very good cuddler to help people fall asleep

Eugene Roe:

-The sweetest bestest man for this situation??? Like, listen, he gets it. This is also someone who is sleep deprived. However, he worries way more about you and your health.

-Will pull medical rank to ensure that you get your nap

-Also more than willing to sneak you something to make sure that you fall asleep haha

-But more than anything, he's the type of man to tell you old Cajun tales in his soft voice to get you sleepy

Bill Guarnere:

-Literally will point blank tell you to go take a nap

-Then in a much softer and sweeter tone, will swing his arm around you, and ask if he can take a nap with you

-He's very invested in making sure that you're well rested and is the type of man to bribe with food and other means to ensure that you listen to what your body needs—and that's sleep

-Will talk your ear off about what it's going to be like when you're sleep deprived after the war and WHY you're going to be sleep deprived. I promise it's for a much dirtier reason lol.

Joe Toye:

-Acts as though he himself is tired and needs to take a nap. And point blank asks if you'll help him fall asleep.

-This technique is sneaky and though you might pick up on it, it's the thought that counts here

-He's out here ensuring that you don't feel like you're stressing him out by doing this—and making you feel as though you're helping him just as much as he's helping you

-Honestly, this man is a 10/10 in this situation

George Luz:

-Makes you laugh so hard that you cry out of exhaustion and then asks you if you're tired so that you have to admit it

-At which point he just takes your hand and declares that you're going to take a nap and he's going to watch your back for you

-It's all very sweet and very Luz of him tbh

-Holds your hand until you're asleep and presses a kiss to your forehead