#THEN THERES ALSO THE ONE IM USING RN WHICH ANYONE CAN USE RN BUT I LIKE THE INDIVIDUALITY I GOT RN WITH IT
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ohh so itz one of Those days for me today huh.
#days where i ponder What if my friends and also literally everyone ever all Hated me due to the Valid reasons for hating me.#and then i spend so much time contemplating 1) what i would do if Everyone hated me and how i would explain myself in various situations an#places. what i would say how people would react what i would do in response etc. and then also 2) i contemplate and recontemplate my belief#over and over even tho i Know by now how i feel. because What if my opinion changes and i realize i was wrong before. and i finally arrive#at the perfect answer that feels Right and Good and True and which i could adequately explain to anyone and convince anyone of itz Rightnes#and Correctness. like thats not gonna happen thats not an answer that Exists can i chill out and focus on my classwork pleas.#i mean actually i have gotten some shit done. but i have More to do still. and i should work on more things instead of Contemplating and#Feeling bad over and over in ways i knooowwww will not lead me anywhere new. but what if they do!! what if i stop thinking about things and#then one day i would have had some realization if only id thought more but i didnt!#like come on. theres more productive things i can be doing with my time than going back and forth about this. pleaseee. this will not lead#to anything new can i Please do something useful and not bad-feeling with my time instead#but also i should not avoid uncomfortable thoughts just because they feel bad.. itz Important to be uncomfortable sometimes in order to gro#hhhhhhhhhhhh. this has been my brain all day whenever im not sufficiently distracting myself with conversation or school work.#imagining and running through scenarios of what would happen if various strangers and friends found out and disliked me for some things#is Not a good or productive use of my time rn. i need to focus on not failing any classes Please
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i made an oc thats at least nicknamed "Stupid" and im constantly thinking about what a power move that is tbh
#toy txt post#i miss it i should play w her more often but it was going to be for a dnd thing that ive all but abandonded bc i feel like#i cant. do that but it sucks bc i had some cool fun concepts and characters but it was hard enough back then when i was just insecure and#knew nothing about dnd and was intimidated by the mechanics but wanted to try dming for some reason but now i just straight up dont know#what to do but i really enjoy those characters. i should just unlock the secret channelsand scrap the dnd game idea for now and keep the#concepts and im sure i could come up w something if i ever actually learned anything about that shit#anyway. my point being. im obsessed w my character i made up and you should be too cos its good shit#toxic anarchist half dragon demigod with authority issues whos an alloaro clown named Stupid Cupid.#i think her pronouns were whatever but also it/she? when i say toxic i mean it did have a bit of a Clown Cult.#Cupid i think is possibly its given name and Stupid was her clown ass addition and yes i do know of the song and yes it is on its playlist#obsessed w all the stupid overpowered characters i made in that universe. they were such good concepts. gulliver obviously. charybdis#silas (cupids father + previous (now deceased) god of chaos)#cupids mother who i dont think i had a name for yet but she was supposed to be kind of a neutral lawful (in a rules lawyering way)#moon paladin who hatefucked the god of chaos after failing to kill him which she was trying to do out of devotion to the moon#and she supposed to have what i can only describe as chainsaw powers? and she destroyed every gun in existence and killed anyone who knew#how to make them until there were no guns left bc silas kept being annoying w guns and was trying to use them on the moon. for reasons#so she really pissed him off and impressed him before she finally got to him and tried to kill him. and if she was even a minor god instead#of a 'mortal' it wouldve worked and thats the only reason he didnt die from her. and then her child. stupid cupid the clown#grew up and had issues and started a clown cult and wandered around usurping warlords and dictators before putting her aim on silas#and trying to kill him. but failing not bc she was mortal but bc he outsmarted it. but he couldbt bring himself to kill it so he had her#put to sleep for a thousand yrs until someone else killed him(he pissed off a stupid seagull druid who lured him into the path of Charybdis#who he'd ALSO pissed off and Charybdis mega killed him and then the gull druid was made the new god of chaos just to have someone fill the#roll but then they kind of suck at it? they did not want that much responsibility altho the immortality is nice. when they took over they#released cupid whos a bit of a legend but then the vibes are super weird bc cupid Definitely wants to usurp and take on the mantle of#chaos deity and gulliver idolizes her but doesnt feel great about just handing that over to it? and cupid has to grapple with not being the#one to kill silas. almost everyone she knew is dead. her mom isnt. the world has changed a lot. she finds out her cult is still going and#gets excited? but they have Changed. it disgusts her now. they are not the radical clowns she intended. the vibes are weird. she denounces#that and tries out piracy. she manages to get the moon paladin living chainsaw power?#despite not being aligned w their ideology at all. wow nepotism. then it was going to spiral into some fucking meta galactic shit and have#well. ran out of tags. anyway i miss this character i should figure out what im doing w this universe cos theres no way im dming rn 🙃
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Do you have any good pictures of cathal that could serves as a pfp? (totally didn't spend like 20 minutes trying to find a good cathal picture and haven't really found any)
I have a few screenshots I've used as PFP's before or considered using! I have a whole folder of just random Cathal screenshots for this purpose so you know how it is. (Most of these are just from the Lunch Break animation becauseHis Happy Smile :] )
And honestly if you ever want some edit or whatever if I got the time feel free to ask as well!
And some renders from the WIKI that are easy to edit with (On the bottom one of them was cropped by me in the Valentoon's day card before we got official renders accessible on the Wiki - they're basically the same one, except one has a sandwich!)
Actually, I have just a crop of their head, so you can slap any flags behind a happy Cathal :] (Their antenna are even up high!!!)
If my art was more pfp usable (NO WACKY AHH BACKGROUNDS) I'd suggest that as well - but my Cathal drawings are often really personal to me and I'd just prefer if nobody used those. Though, if anyone wants to use my art for avatars just ask me about which piece and how you can credit me and whatnot!!!
I also have this upscaled version of the art from somewhere???
And some silly ones for last! :]
#invited me to talk about cathal *AND* share images so its a long post oopsies#THEN THERES ALSO THE ONE IM USING RN WHICH ANYONE CAN USE RN BUT I LIKE THE INDIVIDUALITY I GOT RN WITH IT#i recognize things by avatars so yaknow#can still use it anywhere anytime ofc#cathalposting#multislacker#[answered]#long post#urghh i miss the era i used the first row of pfps#the ones that look like cathal is giggling especially#rlly cute#id use as discord pfp but my discord pfp is frostbite and high roller i had to listen to my brain worms#also not me using pfp and avatar this interchangeably oops but whatever its the same thing basically
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me: i figured out how to open my play!
also me: researching brussels zuid/midi station intensively
#these things are important to me so if anyone can tell me which platform is the intercity direct to amsterdam thats lekker#i love it when things are annoyingly accurate and like yea#i would have just used antwerp BUT BUT BUT he's in wallonia theres a running thing with that#bc everyone is like 'oh how was flanders' and he's like... bro#its a running joke with the whole merel rooijakkers verse actually#so in that case brussels zuid/midi makes more sense even though i remember the antwerp platform#orginally the opening was about the value of goud but i think thats too cliche and i should just open the play with dirk-jan leaving#but yeah im the person that phonetically wrote out amsterdam metro announcements in dutch just for that sense of accuracy bc its the detail#and now i have a duty to include that scene#but also merel reveals some crucial information about herself in that scene so thats fun#the part where she explains that shes so connected to language she knows theres nothing that she can't express in that language#(yeah shes one on THOSE ppl)#and then at the end we find out that the breakup affects her so much she can't express how shes feeling#but the fact i phonetically transcribe this shit in dutch? like sat in my little amsterdam room and copied it down...#says a lot about how i care too much about certain details and not too much about others lol#anyways im in my hometown rn what else am i gonna do lmao i hate this place#dutch language found dead
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nvm im too tired and overstimulated for this shit
#.vent#i only slept a couple hours last night man. i cant do short notice evening socials on an empty tank let alone resist unexpected rsd#if they had let me know earlier then i wouldve taken a nap and worked out beforehand to get my energy back up#idk just. if u rly want my company then maybe u should actually invite me next time. its not like they didnt plan it#even if they just forgot its not particularly pleasant to be the one person insignificant enough to forget abt. theres only 5 of us#they rly remembered to ask the one guy who isnt even here before me yknow. ugh u see the stupid thoughts i have to battle!!#like on a rational level ik it was probably genuinely accidental. but the way i instinctively react is not always rational#so regardless someone has to deal with the emotional fallout and thats me. regulating this shit is hard work even when im NOT tired asf#i really really dont want to be an asshole and spoil anyones fun bc its no-ones fault + as real as it feels to me rn ik im overreacting#but i cant voluntarily expose myself to personal triggers when im already exhausted + more vulnerable than usual#so just gotta shut myself in my room and deal with it in my own super healthy ways as per usual. may they never fucking find out#trying my best not to be an asshole i hope to fucking god they dont think im being an asshole i just told them i was tired + i meant it#this wouldnt be so much of a problem if it hadnt happened to me before. and also ik its bc one rsd trigger makes me more sensitive-#to picking up unrelated cues but there ARE other things they do that i find ostracising which rly dont fucking help. but-#theyre not things i can actually confront them abt so usually i just gotta deal w it which is fine but it lowers my general tolerance#its ok. its ok i like them all a lot theyre lovely ppl and it doesnt matter if there is a some grain of truth in the things im thinking#bc the risk of me believing + acting on a bad faith irrational thought leads to outcomes that are far worse than those from#misidentifying someones malicious behaviour towards me as neutral by accident/in good faith. okay im done now i think#just ignore me spewing out the old brain gunk on main again eurgh anyway im gonna go calm myself and read and SLEEP#ill be normal by tomorrow morning farewell comrades#honestly i dont mind dealing w shit this way bc its the best option for everyone but man. sometimes its so fucking lonely#like there are sides of me ppl will never engage with and for good reason but without them being acknowledged i find it rly hard to feel-#any real emotional intimacy or closeness with another person. but what other option is there#i sure as hell dont miss the fights i used to constantly get into when i wasnt able to regulate myself i lost so many friends that way#it is what it is. on we go for now
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bleh everything SUCKS
#sisters stupid freind/both our roommate is HORRIBLE#hes so controlling and decided hes in charge of of her#she bought a fish. something that doesnt affect him in the slightest. and hes furious with her#hes like. saying it will cause issues in their friendship if she doesnt get rid of it. hes not even saying that its a problem because he#doenst wanna deal with it bc he has acknowledged that it doesnt affect him. hes angry bc he thinks it was impulsive and irrisposible#which like 1. it wasnt and shes beentalking about getting one for years and can probably afford and take care of it and 2. even uf it was#its not a decision that affects him so he has no right. shes an adult who can make her own choices even if theyre are bad ones#hes so mean to her all the time and demands all her time. talks down all her friends. insults her for wanting a relationship. refuses to#listen to any of her problems or support her and refuses to let her talk about any of her interests he doesnt share either#talks down every hobby she has. calls all of it stupid and a waste of money even though he soends SO much money on clothes all the time#and he gets angry with her when she isnt into the stuff he is (mostly shows). even when she agrees to watch it with him he gets angry if#she isnt as into it as she is. hes just decided theyre in a relationship which means shes not allowed to pursue anyone but he is also not#interested in her in the way she wants. he insults her for wanting anything more out of a relationship bc hes content without it rn#hes awful. i hate him. i dont wanna live with him another year. i dont want her to lose him totally bc theyve been freinds for so long and#she really cares about him but fucking hell. they should NOT live together. gonna apply to some places. this lease ends in 3-4 months so#theres not much time for me to adjust but if im adjusted in time then maybe we will go get an apartment just us 2#and then maybe she can get a fucking support dog like she needs bc shes disabled but he refuses to let her get
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Not Quite Right
You're Leon's mystery, he's your mystery. He defends your honor without hesitation, but being around you has him questioning his own morals.
a/n: k personally i didnt deliver with this one i kinda sold but im some kinda block rn needed tk get smth done 🤨😔 (useless core) might rewrite later if ive got inspo
there IS a part two with both a happy and sad ending because i cant let sadness take over but i also just read "if he had been with me" and so yeah ill update this with the links when i post those
tw: angst?? age gap if you squint really hard and look between the lines but nun too serious (theres also suggestive content but wtv)
" if you couldnt tell
they said teamwork makes the dream work
hell i had some help "
wc: 1.8k
The saloon was always bathed in a hazy lemon glow, glaring back at Leon’s squinted eyes as the sawdust kicks up under his boot heels. He peels away from the rowdy crowd and nods to the barkeep for another whiskey. He never really was able to read the small, messy names of absurd drinks scrawled onto the curling paper.
Groaning in frustration, he slams it down, digging his nails into the yellowing parchment. Across the table, he catches your eye, specifically those of which narrow directly at him.
Leon admires your uniform; short, tight-fitted burnt hazel dress. It’s always been ugly to him, but you look… ravishing in it, though his eyes are cool as they flit your way.
And he realizes something else, snapping through his mind rapid-fire.
No one looks at him like that and gets away with it.
“Another round?” he calls out as you saunter past. You eye him sideways but say nothing, shifting your stance at the regulars’ raucous shouts. Not the slightest bit bothered, Leon presses, “Looks like you know your men.”
“Is that so?” you smile, knowingly. “Well, I know that folks say you’ve been ‘passing through’ a while.”
Leon chuckled. “And what do folks say about you?”
“That I know things.”
Intrigued, Leon leans forward. “And what do you know?”
You lean in as well, voice low and intimate. “I know a desperate man when I see one. What are you running from, cowboy?”
“What do you think?”
“That you’re a no-account drifter always poking your nose where it don’t belong.”
Leon chuckles, tilting his hat to adjust to the sudden shift in light. “Reckon I’ll be poking around a while longer then.”
You consider him a long moment. Strangely, Leon wishes he knew what you were thinking. “We’ll see, cowboy. We’ll see.”
Leon smiles. "And what do you suppose that means, miss?"
You chuckle drily. "I’m sure you know exactly what I mean, sir.” And with that vague answer, you turn away, step away, linger in front of him for a moment longer before sauntering away, leaving him with pink ears and flustered thoughts.
If it were anyone else, Leon would’ve been irked. But something about you is different. He doesn’t know why, in a town full of women who adore him, you’re the one to entrance him. He also doesn’t know why instead of pushing you further away, he wants to get closer, unravel your mind like tangled yarn.
So when he walks in the next week, he sits in his regular seat and raises his hand, already spotting you swaying to the music in the back. He knows you see his curled fingers first, before you zero in on his face and the corner of your mouth lifts.
"You seem to have me all figured out." Leon says as you walk past, one hand balancing the drinks on a tray. He tilts his head, studying you curiously. "You’ve done your homework, haven’t you, sweetheart?”
"I sure have,” you reply with a slow, lazy smile, leaning over the counter so only he can hear. “It might come as a shock, but I actually might be using my senses.” You lean away, completely unaware of the effect your husky voice has on him.
He blinks once, twice, before a broad grin spreads across his face. “Well…”
“I’ve got your regular?” you offer, twisting over your shoulder to check the drinks. “On the house?”
“That’s my girl,” he praises as you hand him the cool glass, somewhat back to normal. But your words linger in his mind for an indefinite amount of time. Everywhere, anywhere, whoever’s talking, he wishes it was you whispering weakly into his ear.
Especially when he comes in, as if on a schedule, the next week. His eyes are on you but his thoughts elsewhere, his senses stepping in, flashing warning signs and ringing sirens in his head.
He watches you walk past a group of men he usually sees at this particular bar, in that spot, assuming they’re regulars. What really messes with his temper is when one of them whistles appreciatively and all their eyes immediately switch from your face to a lower area.
“Pay them no mind,” you say dismissively, snapping him out of his trance. “This town has its share of fools.”
Leon pretends to glance you over before returning his stern gaze to them, recognizing one of the rowdy patrons. “Like him?”
The man catches his eye and scowls. “You got something to say, drifter?”
Leon turns back to you with a roguish smile. “Reckon it’s time I shut them fools up, what do you say?”
You sigh resignedly. “Just try not to get yourself killed.”
<><><>
You perk up at the sound you already recognize as his boots shuffling across the wooden planks. You glance back down at the drink in your hands, slightly warmer than usual because he returned so late.
When he excused himself a few hours ago, you assumed he had work to take care of. He always came back, anyways, so why bother yourself with the details when you knew that if he wanted you to know, he would’ve told you.
“Well, where have you been-” You immediately stop talking at his appearance. Blood drips down the side of his face, staining the stubble he’s been steadily growing, trickling down his neck. A bruise lines his jawline, maroon and vivid against his pale skin. He staggers over to you, slumping onto a stool, an awkward lean to the right the only sign of his pain.
“Is that mine?” he rasps, reaching for the drink.
“Kennedy!” you exclaim, gesturing to his state and yanking the glass away from his outstretched hands. “What did you get into?”
“Nothin’.” But you hear the sharp inhale he takes before continuing, “Now, did you get all this ready for me?”
“Mhm,” you mumble, gripping your glass tighter, slightly concerned.
“Use your words,” he chides. And now you aren’t concerned as much.
God, he makes you feel so stupid.
“Yes,” you grit out, struggling to be heard against the bustling crowd.
“How ‘bout this?” Leon hums, not waiting for your answer. “Drinks are on me.”
You can’t help but let a smirk tug at the corner of your lips. “Yeah? Anything I want?”
“For a pretty little thing like you, yeah,” he muses, fully turning to face you. You get a better look at his soft, baby blue eyes, fluffy, sandy hair, the way the ivory lights cast shadows across the planes of his face.
“How about not getting into fights?” you joke. He arches an eyebrow as you pass him napkins. He smears the blood across his chin, right under his lips. You can’t help but stare as he tosses his head back to swallow the drink, imagining the liquid burning his throat. “Did you actually fight that guy? You know I was just jokin’ right?”
Leon rasps something you don’t hear, eyes glazed over. “This… is different. What’d you put in it this time, sugar?”
“Just somethin’ special,” you respond vaguely. “Thought you’d like it.”
“Tastes like shit,” he comments, gingerly pushing the glass away. “What, you going around assuming everyone likes what you like?”
“Last guy did,” you mumble, slightly dejected that he didn’t take well to your concoction. To be fair, you did mess up the first guy’s order, mistaking his single for a double and decided it wouldn’t bother Leon if you got him a different drink, right?
“Last guy’s taste ain’t mine,” he says simply, humming in compliance. You wonder exactly what happened on the way here, why he shows up every week without fail. “Tastes stronger than usual.”
“Can’t handle your drinks?” you jab, the corner of your mouth lifting. It’s always amusing to you when you watch a guy stumble out of the bar, so affected by something you made. It sent a feeling of power rushing to your head, like you could potentially control everyone here.
Or more specifically, the one person you wanted wrapped around your finger.
Leon.
So what if you kept him coming back, glancing up at him every time he left, silently begging him to stay for one more drink? You grew up learning that if you wanted something, you had to work for it.
“I can handle anything,” he slurs, words connecting themselves to the sounds he makes, small purrs escaping his throat and going straight to your head. “It’s just… heavy…”
“Heavy?” You chuckle. “Right.”
“What’d you put in this?” he repeats.
“Just the scotch.” Leon immediately snaps up.
“You know I can’t-”
“Can’t what, Leon? Because you know what I sure can’t do?” His surprised and somewhat curious expression spurs you on. “I can’t sit here and pretend that there’s nothing between us, keep you coming back here every week and have you leave me on the other end of your string.”
You poke him square in his upper chest, digging your finger into the little dip between his collarbones. “And although all the other girls you take to bed can handle that, I sure can’t.”
“I’m… leaving you, sweetheart?” Leon chuckles dryly. “As far as I can tell, you’re the one walking away from me.”
“You walk in here and call me your pretty thing, then leave like it’s nothing!”
“My pretty thing?” The swinging lights dance across Leon's face as he turns, searching my gaze as if seeing new things.
“How much longer? This isn’t how you treat-” In the midst of your rambling, something switches in the air between you and Leon grabs the side of your face, leaning forward, eyes defiant yet demanding.
Quicker than the setting sun through hot summer dusks, he bends his head until your breath mingles, hot and sweet.
And when his lips meet yours, they taste sweeter than you expect, fuller than you see on the outside, like you’re tasting what you can’t see. At the touch of his other hand cupping your head, your doubts slip away.
He doesn’t need words to tell you what his pride had kept tied up tight before. You hear yourself make a sound of protest as he pulls away, suddenly, harshly, eyes shadowed by… regret?
“I… shouldn’t have… shit,” he seethes under his breath. Leon pushes back from the table, the legs of his stool grating against the wooden planks. His brows are knitted tight, like he’s wrestling some demon you can’t see.
You reach for him again but he flinches away, not meeting your imploring gaze. You realize it’s like looking at a stranger wearing Leon's face.
The thought wrenches your heart, so desperately, you plead, “Don’t go. Please. Stay. What do you need to say?”
“I… need to go,” he says, voice trembling. “This was wrong…”
"Don't do this," you beg, hating the tremor in your voice but powerless to still it. Weeks of yearning lead to one perfect moment, shattered before your eyes.
"I'm sorry." The words break on Leon's tongue like he doesn’t mean much to them. He backs towards the door, unraveling with every step while you watch, helpless.
Moonlight throws his anguished profile into sharp relief as you plead, "Stay. Tell me what's got your hackles up, cowboy."
But Leon only shakes his head, hands drawn tight. "You know this won’t work. Us… we can’t."
The words land like blows, stealing your breath. You stagger after him onto the porch, heart cracking down the middle at the distance in his eyes.
"You're running scared is all." Your own voice sounds small and far away. By the set of Leon's shoulders, you know this was a battle you've already lost. “You think you’re not the right one.”
“That’s it,” he says, eyes crinkling at the corner with his smile. “Atta girl.”
“Why?” you insist. “If the shit between us is mutual-”
“Because you’ve got your whole life in front of you, girl!” he says, exasperatedly. “I’ll just fuck everything up for you.”
“But-”
“No buts,” he cuts you off, voice final. But you can hear how it hurts him too. “I’m not heartless. I’ve got a conscience, and as much as it eats away at me, I won’t let it have this one too.” His dull eyes find yours. “I won’t let it have you, too.”
He pauses at the top of the stairs, silhouetted against the inky sky. When he turns, there’s no trace of warmth left in his smile. "Take care of yourself, sweet girl."
Then he’s gone, swallowed up by the dark. You sink onto the creaking steps, tasting tears and the agony of loss, the stars uncaring as they sparkle down at you.
#leon kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy fanfic#resident evil#writing#leon kennedy angst#leon kennedy fanfiction#leon kennedy cowboy#cowboy leon
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siiiigh. todd autism headcanons because im projecting.
(using they/he/she pronouns for todd in this post. will explain but also if u dont agree i dont care, tw for alcoholism. time period is vague but autism hasnt existed as a legitimate medical diagnosis for all that long, so keep it in mind i guess.)
- cannot for the life of him stand welton's blankets. so itchy, just thin enough to not warm you up enough but still make you sweat, not long enough to cover your entire body. yes im making the blanket line in their poem about actual blankets, a boy needs to vent somewhere.
- beyond terrible temperature regulation, ALWAYS just a little too hot which is made worse by her sensory issues when it comes to wet fabric. constant slight agony and it never really goes away. theyre about 5 minutes away from crying about how uncomfortable they are at all times.
- had god awful handwriting until high school, like his teachers could BARELY read his handwriting it was Bad. OOOOOH OH MY GOD THERES A TRAIN GOING BY I CAN HEAR IT HONKING this is a really ironic thing to be pointing out rn but its sooooo worth mentioning. its still honking this is fun. 🚂. anyway. her parents made her spend an entire summer fixing her handwriting bc that was like the One thing her teachers criticised. its Fine now but their motor function simply doesn't deliver in the handwriting department.
- had a VERY INTENSE special interest in aquatic life + marine biology growing up, like read every book about any ocean animal in any library intense. his parents eventually forced him to abandon it because its "not a good career focus" but he still perks up when anyone mentions fish. once talked neils ear off about the biodiversity of coral reefs for roughly 2 hours, neil took her to an aquarium for their first date. rip todd anderson you wouldve loved spongebob squarepants.
- looooves pets, namely cats, but they have Too Sweaty hands all the time so any animal fur sticks onto their hands and just feels. so awful.
- had a brief period in his 20s where he was definitely an alcoholic, started as a social drinker but got too addicted to the feeling of not having to adhere to social conventions quite as hard, especially around other drunk ppl. eventually went sober after they realised they just Cant Stand the feeling of a hangover anymore. autistic ppl r more likely to develop a dependency on alcohol if we do start drinking. just btw.
- gets a Pretty Expansive vocabulary after actually starting to pursue literature. sometimes his family lightly teases him about using big words but it confuses the hell out of him. its just a word she thought would apply best!!
- soooooo obsessed with what other ppls idea of them is, both in an anxious way and out of genuine curiosity. would never ask ppl what they think of her bc she thinks thats 1) very broad 2) seems compliment fish-y and 3) just gonna lead to "i think ur great/ nice/ whatever filler compliment." but the dream is to sit someone (neil) down and just ask him every single question possible about how he perceives him.
- asks a billion clarifying questions about anything someone asks him to do, gets anxious about how many questions he's asking, tries to just figure it out, freaks out about the possibility of getting it wrong, ends up doing the thing perfectly. weekly occurrence.
- never fully grasped the appeal of religion (most definitely grew up catholic or christian or Something) just bc she could NOT let the lack of proof go. ALSO not an atheist bc the vastness of space scares them out of it. religious beliefs r a weird topic for them.
- suppresses a good chunk of his stims in public bc One total time someone looked at him weird while he was chewing on a sweatshirt string and he was like i gotta stop NOW. eventually develops tics and has to mask THOSE in public too. dear god someone let this girl unmask. also i started ticcing while writing that bc my body does this great thing where i only tic when im reminded of the concept of ticcing. its great and totally doesnt make me think im faking them (faking for who? dunno bc it usually happens when im alone)
- DOES in fact stim around neil bc NEIL STIMS TOO!!!!!!!! joyous day when they found THAT out! gets vocal stims of random lines from whatever play neil is practicing for. YEAA ART THOU THEEEEREE was a vocal stim for a solid week and a half which made neil VERY excited (autistic neil. how i love u autistic anderperry)
- velcro is The most evil vile disgusting material to ever grace this mortal realm. he hates it more than anything ever and i mean that fully. the feeling of BOTH sides, the noise, how easily it comes apart, she hates it all.
this is the gender part
never really viewed gender and gender roles as anything to adhere to beyond the fear of punishment if they dont. finds any social convention relating to gender to be Really dumb and meaningless, bc gender isn't (scientifically) real in any capacity, so why treat it like that? for the longest time just shrugged and said "eh, i guess im a boy" bc thats what she was used to being told, and didn't feel particularly drawn to agree OR disagree. eventually realised on a late night that Wait. i dont Actually care what i am. like yeah im a Male i guess but also im just me. my brain doesnt have a gender and i basically am my brain, right? and then never really thought about it again because that's genuinely how little he cares. adhering the most to canon with that mindset, she never really tells anyone (for obvious reasons on top of the overall apathy) and just lets the he/him happen to her but. in my dream world? agender they/he/she todd anderson. and this is MY blog so those are the pronouns im using from now on. i will forever love talking abt how autistic ppl very often view gender differently than allistic ppl, will forever love talking abt how autistic ppl are more likely to be trans. autism!!!
also yes that entire paragraph is just my view of gender, change the pronouns and the todd mentions and its just me. what of it.
#desire mona#YAYYYYYYYY TODD AUTISM POST#do yall want a seperate autistic anderperry hc post cuz i can do that#genderqueer todd i love you so much#dead poets society#todd anderson#anderperry#the todd spectrum#actually autistic#banger
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what do you think about the characters in Double Exposure so far?
the characters themselves arent that bad,, but i definitely cant say i really care for any of them yet. as in i wouldnt be that upset at any of their deaths
at first i was NOT vibing right with Safi at all considering literally all of her jokes are straight up hit or miss, but the more we learn about her (or. learn that we have a lot to learn) the more i’ve grown interested and fond of her. she kinda gives Way Too Excited For 8 AM Teacher vibes.
Moses is kinda intriguing to me right now, but is also pretty much a nothing burger,, i can only assume (and hope) i’ll see more about him after chapter 1. so. he’s kinda silly, thats about it.
OH Loretta. i hate her so much, she’s so funny, i love her. i always love to hate a good bitchy girl character. oh my cod— ESPECIALLY when the look she gives Max if u try to call her bluff. im definitely hella excited to see more of her— especially since she clearly brought out the more bitchy side of Max. honestly so far i think these two’s dynamic is my favorite. she kinda feels like Max, Victoria, and Rachel all smushed together.
then theres Gwen,,, the game’s definitely setting us up to be suspicious of her. i dont have many thoughts about her though other than that. shes hot ? kinda endearing when shes not pissed at us. thats about it.
Amanda……………. 😒 she exists ig. no fr though, she’s literally fine. she feels more like a quirky best friend disney channel character than a real person. and then theres with the game SHOVING her and max together… idk! maybe ill warm up to her. i dont want to hate her but the game is very quickly pulling me down that route.
oh then the other guy max can flirt with for some godforsaken reason?? Vinh is his name i think. i dont trust him, and i dont think were supposed to. personally i think it feels ooc for max to openly flirt with him back— especially so quickly,, even if she’s doing it jokingly or smth. like girl you were just either talking about how you can never recognize when youre being flirted with or need to take time before flirting back with someone— AND even then. you’d think max would be more wary of overly charming who show an interest in her.
which brings me to Lucas. im guessing if anything happens with him he’s gonna be a red herring. maybe it’s just me, but i wouldn’t be surprised if were supposed to be reminded of jefferson when we see him,, at least he doesnt have any real interest in her though.
pretty sure Amanda and Vinh are the only two love interests? either way i honestly dont think it makes sense for Max to be seeking either of them out romantically. this may be the Aro in me, but chloe was a realistic “love interest” in the OG game because well. they were Max and Chloe. and besides that Max was already with her basically 24/7, and was obsessed with her. they made sense. they werent forced or obviously placed there just to be love interests— it was natural.
honestly Amanda and Vinh just seem like.. love interests for the sake of love interests.
tbh any love interest for Max right now just feels,,,, maybe could’ve been the right person but WAY too wrong of a time. like i dont even see an interesting unhealthy dynamic— and if i wanted that i would just go to current DE!pricefield so.
this brings me to Chloe… im happy she’s haunting the narrative rn,,, could be doing it a little harder imo—but other than that im. trying not to form any huge opinions on the Max and Chloe situation. when we (hopefully istg decknine) get the whole picture ill probably talk about this more. im just pretty conflicted.. and also wishing decknine just CHOSE one of the endings (bay WHO SAID THAT) instead of leaving it open to not piss anyone off.
oh uh then Reggie and Diamond,, i dont have any thoughts about them really except for being mildly intrigued by the amount of attention handed over to Diamond. im guessing she’ll have more plot relevance later,,, but Reggie will prob stay a very side character.
i thinkkk thats everyone? OH. Yasmin. not much about her. can appreciate how much she cares about Safi’s murder. but yeah nobody else comes to mind,,, and if i did miss somebody i guess that just goes to show how little i think of them.
so i guess overall my thoughts about the DE characters are “we’ll have to see what happens.”
#lis#life is strange#lis de#lis double exposure#life is strange de#life is strange double exposure#lis de spoilers#lis double exposure spoilers#dont know/remember most of their last names. so.#max caulfield#chloe price#thanks 4 the ask 😼 i love 2 yap#woof
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do you have a Batfam skill ranking? or a favorite character skill ranking👀👀
i cant do a fav character skill ranking because ill immediately get overwhelmed. but i love controversy so i can absolutely skill rank batfam
from most to least skilled (also disclaimer that power scaling discussions in comics mean nothing because whoever is most skilled is entirely based on what the writer wants. but in this case im in charge)
cass
bruce
jason
damian
duke
dick
babs
tim
steph
and my explanation is under the cut <3
cass: this one should be obvious. if this isnt obvious to you you should stop what youre doing and read batgirl 2000 right now. i could argue shes the best fighter in the entire dcu so shes clearly the best fighter in the batfam
bruce: sorry to be a toxic batman fan but i stand by the tried and true adage "Batman Solos With Prep Time." his entire deal is that he's spent most of his life training to become a perfect fighter. he could never beat cass but hes extremely skilled
jason: his whole deal in lost days was that he wanted all the training batman had and he kinda put his pussy into getting it done for like 3 years. he is an extremely competent fighter and he gets Talia's Son Privilege because she gets him the best training available and he is serious about it. bruce is more skilled mostly for the fact that he has more experience and more training but jason is still a strong contender
damian: league of assassins training. id say its safe to assume he has a lot of the same training that bruce and jason have, not to mention he also gets Talia's Son Privilege bc my girl is not letting any of her kids have subpar training <3 hes lower than bruce and jason because once again he just has less experience than them, but hes still one of the best fighters in the family
duke: read batman and the signal im so serious. he caught a knife in midair. he turns invisible. i havent read future state but someone told me that hes one of the best fighters in the future and i believe them. the only reason hes not higher on this list is that cass bruce jason and damian are so skilled that i dont think duke's powers give him an advantage over them, but hes definitely one of the most skilled in the batfam
dick: hes a good fighter and he knows what hes doing, plus he has like 20+ years of experience atp (i actually dont know how old he's supposed to be in canon rn but im a mid-30s dick truther). but i simply do not believe hes in the top half of fighters in the batfam. hes good but many of them are just better sorry!
babs: it is so hard for me to put her so low im sorry babs. as batgirl and as oracle shes a great fighter but shes just not one of the best :( if i was only talking about her as batgirl she'd probably be much lower but as oracle shes redeeming herself. in oracle: year one she trains a Lot and is a fantastic fighter, plus if you read bop she is constantly winning fights <3 shes not above dick just because her main training is in escrima which is. exactly what dick uses. so hes more skilled but shes not far behind him
tim: hes not really exceptionally skilled at fighting. he has the basic Bat Training and hes a good fighter but hes not any better than anyone else in the batfam (besides steph). theres not really any skill that i can think of that hes better at than the others so he has to be ranked low. he has as much training as everyone else but theyre all just better
steph: IM SO SORRY STEPHIE...... but in terms of fighting skills she just isnt above any of the other bats. shes much less trained than everyone else so shes not more skilled than anyone else. shes more skilled than the average person but much less skilled than the average bat. one of the reasons i love batgirl 2009 is that shes a failgirl and i love that for her. let women fuck everything up all the time
#dont come at me for excluding ppl. anyone i didnt mention is mostly because i dont know enough about them#or maybe i just forgot about them! who knows#batfam#dc
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A:FoP Sky Breaker DLC Thoughts...
Alright so i finished the main story of the DLC and have let my thoughts cook for a minute. This is just some of my thoughts/opinions overall. I will have to do a separate post for my more intense thoughts because I managed to actually hit the character limit and I wasn't even halfway through everything (i didn't even know tumblr had one of those and I've been on here for over a decade)
Spoilers for Avatar: Frontiers of Pandora Sky Breaker DLC under the cut.
The opening? Gorgeous. Amazing. Fantastic. Obsessed with the little cut scene of our Sarentu on their Ikran. I am in love. I was really pleasantly surprised to see Kin right off the bat too! Thats my grandpa, i love him! And then walking with the Zakru and getting to hear other NPCs talking was really nice. I loved the banter about So'lek.
Getting into the main games camp was visually very pretty but confusing. I got lost immediately (distracted by the wandering Zakru) and accidently came in from the back? and then proceeded to not be able to find anything or anyone. I kept getting turned around and winding up back with Etuwa and Ka'nat. I did eventually find everyone else but it was a struggle.
Was Eetu only there at the very start??? He was hanging out with So'lek and having a very cute banter and then as everything progress he completely disappeared. Sosul too for that matter. It made me a little worried when he wasn't there after a while bc it felt like almost all the other key npcs got at least a small cameo in other quests but not Eetu? I got paranoid he died but also i think hes an important enough NPC that someone else would have said something if that was the case. I guess i just wanted more of him in general. (Im biased/delusional and ship him with my Sarentu, i will take literally anything)
Theres also a smaller moment, walking around where Teylan calls and starts talking about Nor, about how he would have loved the games, that really got me. For a second i actually thought Nor might come back later in the story, but given how things went it makes sense that he wouldnt. I do really hope that Nor shows up in the next DLC because I really need closure for him. He deserves to see and be a part of what his fellow Sarentu are building and to heal from all the hurt he has been through.
Can the Zeswa PLEASE catch a break? 😭 First the arches are collapsed, then Pasuk, now this?? I need this to be the last big bad thing that happens to them for a while.
More So'lek all the time please! I love him. I loved his role in the over all story and how he helps us throughout the final mission. He is the reason i am desperate for a romance in this game, but i can't have that so i'll just have to write it myself fhdjskghfs
I will be making a separate post about my thoughts on everything with Alma and Mokasa.
With the last of TAP (more or less) gone now, I'm really curious about the next DLC and the general future of Frontiers. Secrets of the Spires comes out in Fall, which is rapidly approaching, but i doubt we will hear anything until like September at the earliest. I think I remember hearing about a new clan in the new area for that one?? (Could be wrong though) Im really curious what the plot for that one is gonna be now that Mercer and Harding are gone.
Hopefully we will see Nor again. I'm kinda also hoping for a movie cameo? like Norm or Max showing up? We got an audio cameo of Ardmore, i think it'd be cool to see some friendly faces or at least audio for one of those guys. I don't think we will get a Jake cameo but i would lose my mind if we did lol.
Im also really hoping that theres more content coming in the future? More DLC or comics or something cause AFoP is the only thing keeping me sane when it comes to Avatar Brainrot rn.
#froglet rambles#avatar frontiers of pandora spoilers#frontiers of pandora spoilers#sky breaker dlc spoilers#afop spoilers#avatar frontiers of pandora#james cameron avatar#avatar way of water#avatar the way of water#frontiers of pandora#atwow frontiers of pandora#atwow#afop sky breaker#sky breaker dlc#james cameron's avatar#avatar 2009
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if you're comfortable, i would love to know more about the akechi npd headcanon. i think it's a rlly interesting take on his character and i wanna learn more abt npd bc i have bpd and ig im interested in what people experience with the other cluster b personality disorders? i just kinda wanna know why you think he has it and also maybe some of the mental stuff he has to experience with it. doesn't have to be detailed or personal i dont wanna make u uncomfy! i just cant stop thinking abt this hc haha :)
im actually on a mental health break right now, but this ask intrigued me so im answering it anyway. first off thank you for staying kind throughout the whole thing :)
its kind of hard for me to really describe why i think a character has/is something, because things like personality disorders are still a wide spectrum and every person experiences things differently, and i dont wanna make it seem like theres a one-way to have npd, but im gonna try anyway!
there is a site which helped me immensely throughout my self-diagnosis, so if you want to read more about the topic than what im gonna say here, here u go:
lets start simple and the thing that makes it most obvious to me: the engine room dialogue.
people with npd can heavily rely on other people for their self-esteem, because narcissists usually have a very low one. thats why they take on many tasks ("i was extremely particular about my life, my grades, my public image—so someone would want me around!") and might overwork themselves for more praise and acknowledgement ("you wanted to be acknowledged, didn't you? to be loved?") because its what they need to not constantly crash. a crash is something that happens when you dont get enough supply—which can be words of affection, praise, acknowledgement, etc—and you internalize it, doubt yourself, feel disgusting and generally you get to a really low point. this is just speculation, but i can see goro having a ton of those, especially during the time the phantom thieves get popular and he becomes public enemy nr 1. thats also why i drew him thinking "i really need supply rn but i'd rather die than ask for attention" because vulnerability is also a big thing people with npd can struggle with. we dont want to be seen as weak—our narcissism is essentially a shield, so we're seen as tough, when in reality, our egos can be very fragile.
one thing that the engine room makes very clear and also other interactions goro has with akira, is that hes very envious of others who have had it better than him. especially someone like akira, who was thrown away by society just like he was, was able to move past it, found friends and is acknowledged by many people. goro is jealous of it all, and thats the thing; people with npd can feel like they're supposed to be special ( and to me, with goro explaining how he got his personas, and how he often calls others stupid, its clear that he does feel that way about himself to a certain degree ) and anyone who threatens that status, anyone who seems much more special than we are is seen as a legitimate threat. its an ugly feeling and it can make us hate even those we love for some time.
this attributes to dysregulation of our emotions too. people with npd often feel their emotions, especially negative ones, way more intense than they actually should be and have difficulty calming down due to that. negative emotions often linger for a long period of time and its hard to move on so we hold grudges. now this might come to no surprise to anyone that goro is a very angry and sad person. especially in the engine room its clear that even after the others extend their hands out to him, its difficult for him to comprehend and he still acts rather mean and calls them idiots for trying to "save" him. when someone with npd is experiencing a multitude of negative emotions, it may cause them to avoid other people or act aggressive towards them because they feel trapped. theres many explanations as to why goro is the way he is in the 3rd semester, and i dont think only one of them has to be correct, but i do think that with the knowledge of whats happening ( like: being under the control of someone else again, or having to work with people who are unpredictable and who have seen you at your lowest point ) makes him act out to keep all of them, especially akira, at bay.
in the duel against akira—im sorry i cant really quote it, i just have a general idea of it in my head rn—i read what he says in a way that makes it clear that he struggles with a superiority AND inferiority complex, which sounds stupid at first i know, but its fairly easy to explain. like i already said, a narcissist's self-esteem is usually pretty low and we rely on others to know how to feel about ourselves. theres two traits of npd that are necessary traits to have: being self-centered and feeling entitled to good treatment, and seeking admiration from others/liking to be the center of attention. so there is some kind of superiority complex going on, at least thats what i would call it in goro's ( and my ) case. we can feel on top of the world in one moment, but once we have a crash or experience intense negative emotions, its back to being the worst human being on earth. i dont think its ooc to say that goro hates himself, as some like to claim he only ever thinks hes better than everyone else. i think that just attributes to harmful stigma. with everything goro experiences in life, coping with narcissism to hide a fragile sense of being just makes sense to me.
theres more i could probably add here but this thing is long enough as is. please do keep in mind that many of my headcanons for goro are me projecting—but that doesnt mean theres no basis for it in canon as well, as i've tried to explain here. at first i actually thought he could have bpd, but i dont know enough about it to really judge that—so it could still very well be that, or both, i dont really know how it works! im rather new to this as well, and at first i was scared of doing any research because npd is so heavily stigmatized. i wish there were more people like you, anon.
if you have any more questions feel free to ask them :)
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Hey, I’m currently trying to leave the radqueer and transid communities. I keep wanting to go back, I keep wanting to be “the really inclusive one”. I know my time there hurt me, but I still feel like somehow they’re “not that bad” Can you send me links to some of the worst transids you have found. I know they have coined some really bad things, but I kind of need to see it with my own eyes. I’m messaging you because you’re the most well known anti-radqueer.
ive collected a bit most of these screenshots are from what we've collected for the carrd. anyone is free to add to this in the notes cus theres 100% more stuff we missed. also no spoons for ids cus theres just so many images
tw for: mentions of the r slur, antisemitism/nazis, lolishos, CSA, cults, RAMCOA, TERFs, Transphobia, racism, ableism. you get it.
these were like all the images i could fit on mobile
see also:
warning on kandiqueer(link) / Radqueer is a cult(link) / more shitty transids(links)
non links:
the existence and acceptance of pro c (not just for the "big 3" but for murder/assault paraphilias and ones that can put ones health at risk) , transharmful etc., kandiqueer and its variants, xenosatanists, loli/shotacon, csam, adults being intimate with minors/animals etc.
radqueers stealing terms or trying to claim terms are part of their shit (despite outcry from the communities surrounding said terms): transrace (adoptees), transabled/BIID, chronosian, aldernic, transgender, transpecies, etc.
the constant comparing of paraphilia, disability, race, age, etc. to gender and being trans/queer and the basically piggy backing off queer/disabled etc. communities
the large overlap of "youth liberation" and lolishos/pro cs
the sheer amount of "noone will accept you but us"
defending blackface, racefaking, disability faking, racist/ableist stereotypes, etc.
the constant harassment of not just anyone who doesn't like them but those who are in their community who question or criticise anything rq. and the harassment of ex radqueers, which goes from anonymous threats all the way to claiming their trauma from being rq isnt real.
the activity that goes on in the background outside tumblr (like discord) where alot of illegal material is being traded aswell as grooming and pressuring minors to send images of themselves, and very likely alot more im not remembering
aaaaaand if theres anymore ill add it later either by edit or by reblog. again. feel free to add anything in the notes cus it helps. especially image ids cus i can not do those rn or at all.
#anti radqueer#anti transid#anti transabled#antiradqueer#anti transx#anti transrace#anti trace#anti transautistic#anti transill#tw r slur#r slur tw#r slur#antisemitsm tw#tw antisemitism#tw nazi#nazi tw#tw csa mention#csa mention#tw csam mention#tw cult mention#tw cult#cult tw#tw ramcoa mention#tw ramcoa#ramcoa tw#transphobia tw#tw transphobia#racism tw#tw racsim#THATS LITERALLY ALL THE TAGS I CAN ADD
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so, 6 days ago I made this post. It links to a google form, and in the google form there's a series of questions relating to Obey Me!. In the original post I said that i would post the results in early August. it is now early August, and these are the results.
oh! but first: a couple notes. 1) you can view the results here. i encourage everyone to read it for themselves, because it's interesting (to me, subjectively). there's also a spreadsheet but its a pain to read. but if anyone wants me to post it i can. 2) the data in this post is from 8/4/2024 at 1:03am, at which point there were 50 responses. 3) the google form is still up and functioning. I'm going to continue to maintain it for awhile (or, at least, that's my intention). so if you haven't already filled it out, and you would like to do so, go right ahead! If you decide to do so, I appreciate it a lot.
more people consider their MC to have a binary gender than consider themselves to have one & I'm somewhat curious as to why that is.
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this is about what I was expecting, to be honest. 5 people think that nightbringer isn't canon where as 32 people do think it's canon. and 13 people gave another more nuanced answer.
I personally don't think nigthbringer is canon, but I already knew that wasnt the general consensus, and I'm pleasantly surprised that 5 entire people do agree with me.
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obviously, this isn't all of the responses to those questions. but i think it's interesting how people (for the most part) chose to give short 1 sentence answers, as opposed to longer responses.
but also, the number of people who effectively just "awww the scrunkly double tap now if you'd scrunkly the when"ed about their favorites is a little fun and kinda silly
also also i very much relate to the person who said they wanted a 'full groveling' type apology but I'm pretty sure its for different reasons.
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so, i made a typo when i first made the polls. and someone like,, told me. so i corrected the options to no longer contain a spelling error. so now there's 2 different Belphegor options in the results. look i dont wanna talk about it. we should just keep this between us, and not bring it up ever. okay? thanks.
so, on average, this is the most typical order of favorites: Mammon Satan Mammon Levi Beelzebub Asmodeus Belphegor i wasn't expecting any of them to place twice, tbh. but like whatever.
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okay. theres more, but i dont have anything else to say rn. brains slow and you should probably check the results out for yourself anyway. (again, results can be viewed here its really cool and poggers and you should look at it for yourself please <3) (also, note. im sorry if i made any errors or mistakes or anything like that when making this post, i dont do stuff like this very often)
#obey me#obey me!#obey me! shall we date?#obey me shall we date#obey me nightbringer#obey me! nightbringer#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me! lucifer#obey me! mammon#obey me! leviathan#obey me! satan#obey me! asmodeus#obey me! asmo#obey me! levi#obey me levi#obey me beel#obey me! beelzebub#obey me! belphegor#obey me belphie#obey me! belphie#obey me polls
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hi you should talk more about your blue ring Pac headcanons (it's really cool and I like it a lot)
YIPPEEYIPPEEYIPPEEYIPPEE KISSING U ON THE MOUTH RN MWAH THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR GIVING ME AN EXCUSE TO TALK ABOUT HIM
ok so first and foremost as I've said I imagine him having the spots on his face neck and shoulders, i think he'd have them on all of his joints too though. The spots are normally dark yellow/brown when theyre at rest but thats BORING so i hc that the blue in his are always somewhat visible but when startled or threatened they glow brighter and expand. this video is a good visual reference (watch it its neat)
youtube
I imagine that along with the spots the rest of his skin would get a bit darker like the octopus does! i also imagine that his skin would be bumpy/textured the way they are, especially around his browbone and temples.
He can't entirely change his shape the way an octopus can, he's still mostly human in function and his muscles are as unyielding as anyone elses most of the time - but when he wants to he can stretch out to make himself look bigger and more threatening, and he's unnaturally flexible enough to slip through small cracks and crevices. it's... really freaky to watch. of course his metal leg poses a challenge since it can't be as fluid as the rest of him, but he's tricky enough to get it through most of the time. If he really needs to hide in a small space and it won't give he can always just detach it
He has crevice dweller instincts, so whenever he needs comfort or security his first instinct is to squeeze himself into the smallest space he can. He habitually piles whatever he can find outside of the space and outside of the door to his room/bases like the real life octopus piles rocks outside its home
He doesn't have tentacles, but his hands and fingers are covered in tiny almost invisible suckers that have surprising grip strength - not enough to stick him to walls spiderman style, but enough that he never drops anything and if he's holding your hand it takes notable effort to detach yourself
Blue ring octopuses carry two toxins (probably??? theres some dispute) - one that paralyses prey thats present in their saliva, and an incredibly potent neurotoxin in that they use for defense and acts both as a poison to predators and as injectible venom- they're one of the deadliest animals on earth in relation to their size. Pac has both of these but less potent, a hard enough bite from him will result in some nausea, dizziness, and weakened/paralyzed muscles if he breaks skin (his teeth are just a TINY bit too sharp to be normal by human standards, but not enough to tear through muscle) but it wont Kill you. and making out with him will give you a few spasms and a bit of weakness/dizziness - fit learns this the hard way, and pac apologizes profusely but because he's pac fit is actually really into it which is kinda weird but hey what are you supposed to do when your boyfriend has toxic saliva other than develop a kink for it (sorry for making it about fitpac it will happen again)
also because BROs carry their venom all throughout their body theyre immune to their own toxin and most other toxins in the same group, so Pac probably has a higher poison resistance than a normal human would
He's a really strong swimmer of course, unnaturally strong for how the prosthetic should weigh him down. Since he still has human shaped limbs what he does isnt quite jet propulsion, but its somwhere between that and normal swimming. I cannot describe the movement im imagining so like just watch the video and try to recreate the Vibes with a human shaped body and you'll get to the same place i am
ok that's kinda all i have there isn't really that much to go off of just because the nature of the octopus makes it kinda hard to study them in depth so we only really know the basics of their behavior, the only other thing i can think of is more of a fun fact which is that their venom is actually produced via a symbiotic relationship with bacteria that lives in their mouth! can't really do much with that in terms of applying it to a character headcanon but its pretty cool right
also i am kinda torn between the normal human mouth with toxic saliva and a normal human mouth that's actually just a front and can unhinge to reveal a horned beak and tentacles hidden inside (if u dont know octopus body plan is basically head with mouth at the bottom and then the tentacles surround it, and it feeds by using the tentacles to pull food in towards the beak which it uses to puncture it and inject venom) I kinda do love that cuz it's freaky and eldrich but on the other hand there is literally no physical way that could ever make any sense so... idk you can decide for yourself lol
thank you again for giving me an excuse to flesh out this headcanon i love it so so much im glad im not the only one that finds it interesting
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I read your thing about stridercest. I didn’t super like the ship (I’m more of a lalondecest girlie) but I respect the hell out of the textual analysis you did. Anyway do you have any good fic recommendations? I want to see what you see in it.
oh fuck yeah i love sharing ship stuff especially with ppl who dont usually go here and vice versa for me. its like hell yeah im digging in sand and its fun i love my sand and then i turn around and woah i had no idea there was even MORE sand just behind me ya dig? that might not have made any sense hahaha. its the joy of trading pokemon cards except with ships
but okay heres some of my current faves. bear in mind i read mostly M and E rated stuff but ive got a sprinklin of lower ratings in here too. im also gonna categorize this list by stridercest flavour. theres a lot so this turned out like ridiculously long
anyone else goin through this feel free to link yalls faves in the replies too cause im ravenous. especially if its haldirk. im constantly craving haldirk
guardiancest
doku line terminus & two steps away from the county line by lildogie these first cause theyre my ultra faves rn and i cant get enough of this au. set in the same universe but county line is the prequel. a/b/o verse with lotsa interesting political stuff and also interpersonal dynamics. dave & dirk are there too and are real cute. its also got mysterious time travelling. i really cant sell these two enough like i am not doin these justice
davedirk / dirkdave
if i woke up next to you by bumbly | G, ~2,700 words, complete. SUPER sweet relationship study, made me fuckin melt. this author has really good stuff for other ships too but mind the archive warnings
dont joke about hentai face broctopus transplants im eating cheese n onion pringles here by smrtnik | M, ~1k words, complete. this one made me fuckin melt its so tender. it truly feels like were peeking into their life together. also great title
Stasis State by Caeslin | T, ~3k words, complete. another really intimate feeling one. its so fuckin sweet. mind the tags for typical dirk suicide attempt but its not on screen its moreso the recovery and how dave is affected by it
“stupid fucking bullshit” ad nauseam by anon | T, 13.7k words, complete. REALLY GOOD AU. trans striders, fade to black sex scene. the boys are cute and you can feel how much theyre drawn to each other immediately. wish there was more of this
sometimes the bad guy wins by nutrimercenary | E, ~7.5k words, ongoing. wow. oh wow. ive been looking for a davedirk fic like this for a long time. PLEASE read the warnings and tags but its so fuckin good. a crossdimentional narrative tug-o-war between dave and ult dirk i fuckin love it
got it goin on by bumbly | E, 7.5k words, complete. dirk indulges daves mommy kink after prying it outta him. its cute and funny and sexy it made me smile. their dynamic is sooo sweet
helping hands by ghostlyAnarchist | E, 5.1k words, complete. THIS IS SO GOOD. its got trans man dave and is genuinely one of the hottest transmasc fics ive read so far and boy howdy ive read a lot. slight warning for dysphoria discussion but its not too bad its all just hot af a dick-sucking venn diagram by Elendraug | E, 10k words, complete. first off domestic af. very established relationship and you can tell. its so fuckin sweet. i looove this one. its like the best kind of silly realistic smut its one of my faves of all time
STILL WITH ME by egbert | E, 8k words, complete. dave and dirk strife and then fuck in the bathroom. holy shit this is hot. their want is like tangible in this one
brodave and a!brodirk
hardware by orphan_account | E, ~8k words, complete. dave gets some dick piercings and bro goes insane about them. hot as hell and also features bottom bro which is my fave. its got a couple uses of the r-slur but its also from 2011 so i take it w/ a grain of salt. 2011 and earlier fics are like internet artifacts (/pos)
but you better never pull it by hapaxlegomena | E, 5k words, complete. wow. WOW. sub top bro and dom bottom dave need i say more. this sub bro activates my cute aggression the power play is great mars & murrie's by orphan_account | E, 6.8k words, complete. a!brodirk, omorashi. super hot!!!! alpha dave is sooo embarrassed about his piss kink but dirk wins in the end hahaha. really intriguing which i know sounds funny on an omo fic but read it and youll know. i love this alpha dave
temporal sunset by Plajus | M, 19.5k over 5 chapters, complete. a!brodirk. holy shit what a ride. this one held me hostage and now lives in my brain rent free (bdum tiss sorry). dirk is terminally ill so i know it wont be for everyone but give it a try and goddamn you wont be disappointed. trust me
a swinging pendulum by ghostlyAnarchist | T, ~900 words, complete. a!brodirk time/dream bubble encounter. wow just wow. the want. the yearning immaterial by LPSunnyBunny | E, 1k words, complete. a!brodirk, trans dirk. holy shit!!!!!! holy shit!!!!! hot hot hot!!!!!!! shower sex sensation control!!!!
haldirk
singular by 2x2verse | E, 6.8k words, complete. hal has an existential crisis dirk catches him and then they fuck tenderly about it. genuinely so romantic. im addicted to this kind of haldirk. honestly i just recommend the entire series diagnostics by 2x2verse | E, 2.9k words, complete. i know i just linked this authors whole collection of haldirk fics but holy crap this one in particular. dom/sub electrostim with sensory deprivation, hal is the dom. i LOVE how hes written here. very attentive domming, great details
A Fatal Error Has Occurred by Mortior | E, 42k words, 4/5 chapters. oh mortior my haldirk regent. really fuckin good character writing in an au where hal has an android body before the alpha session is started. read the tags for warnings. the tension between them is insane endangered by Mortior | E, 100k+ words, complete multichapter. holy fuck where to begin with this one. this is a haldirk sensation. post apocalyptic au where androids won the human-robot war. dirk runs into AR. AR takes an interest in him. dirk takes even more of an interest in AR. if youre gonna read any haldirk read this one
"im basically fucking him" series by Elendraug | T & E, all complete. so!!!!! fucking!!!!! tender!!!!! really cute haldirk progressing through their relationship
ridiculously late by cinnamonfreak | E, 21k, completed multichapter. a/b/o au where dirk suddenly presents. REALLY intriguing hal in this one i fuckin love the power play
roboporn by smrtnik | E, 3.9k words, complete. really fun power play in this one. hal is waterproofed externally but not internally. he gives dirk a handie over his open chassis torso. theres also really sweet snuggling afterwards
#stridercest#guardiancest#davedirk#dirkdave#haldirk#my t#fic rec#theres so many whoops HAHAHAHA#this ask made me really happy though im glad my post caught your eye#like that made me so jazzed
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