#THE QUOTES ON THEIR WIKIS MAKE ME SO SAD. LOVE AND LIGHT

[utilitycaster]

I keep thinking abt your "'must a story have conflict?' Yes actually hope this helps" posts in the context of laudna and imogen because like. Their shippers keep saying like. "You just don't UNDERSTAND the beauty of their Perfect Relationship, the bond that Traumatized People have that makes them In Tune, so sad how you will never understand love or being with another etcetera etcetera" and it's like. what the hell are you talkinf about (they're usually the kind of ppl with weird and bad narrative ideas re: their traumas so uwu sad everyone is against them). Don't we want this relationship to be healthy and beneficial to both of them? Don't get me wrong, I love Toxic Girl Yuri fucked up tragic relationships as much as anyone else but shippers pretty clearly aren't angling for that kind of story, and neither would the trajectory of the campaign support it. The onscreen dynamic isn't even spicy enough to HAVE toxic codependency it's just. There.

what's funny is that actually my favorite era of their relationship was the "we transcend labels, you and I" thing Laudna said to Imogen. Partly bc personal aro feelings but also because THAT felt like genuine no expectations support to fall back on. The idea that they could just Be and always be It wasn't ASKING for the kind of dynamicism of a romantic relationship such and such, but now with the girlfriends thing, it feels like now there should be WAY more than what's been happening. Does any of this make sense?

Hey anon,

So I largely agree (will cover the one point of not entire agreement below). I do want to note that if you're the person who's sent me other questions recently on this topic please feel free to DM me! I think it's valid to want to voice those frustrations, and I get not wanting to do so publicly (though I think the harassment on Tumblr at least has largely died down) but also to be completely honest I have been fully in a Nein and Candela headspace with a handful of exceptions mostly relating to wiki stuff so I've been answering these anons but I'll admit it's not where my thoughts have been re: CR stuff for the past few weeks.

Anyway, I can understand the desire for a QPR or simply close friends for Imogen and Laudna! I am not aro myself, and I do enjoy a good romantic plot, but I'd rather have a well-executed story with no romance than a good story slightly marred by poorly done romance. However, it's actually really interesting to me (in a good/neutral way) that you recall it as "we transcend labels" because the actual quote (3x49, 4:52:57) is "We transcend words, you and I" and I could not stand that because my frustration has again always been that they spend a lot of time talking, and absolutely none of it communicating; they have never transcended words, they have simply not fucking used them well. More generously, I think a relationship in which a couple is on such a wavelength that they do have a sense of how the other feels without needing to talk (or read minds, in this situation) can be aspirational in real life, though again, I don't think that's actually what's going on here; but even if it were, that is not remotely interesting to watch. I truly do not give a shit in the end if relationships on the shows I watch are healthy or unhealthy provided the narrative knows what it's fucking doing and I think people who are obsessed with unproblematic wholesomeness are frankly suspect, but man, either be toxic codependent yuri or be two people trying to understand each other, instead of two people who seem to only occasionally remember that they are important to each other, and never seem to remember why.

But yes, the fact that virtually nothing has changed despite a relationship upgrade, especially in light of the relationship losing my interest as a platonic thing 30 or 40 episodes prior to them becoming a romantic couple is now thrown into more stark relief because you'd think something would change. Like, that's the thing. There was no romance; there was no plot. While I think the people who insisted from the start that CLEARLY they were already dating are the kind of people who would unironically ship my mop and broom solely on the basis of them leaning against each other next to my garbage can, at least if they had already been dating from the start a lack of forward momentum could be somewhat forgiven. I say somewhat, because Veth and Yeza were married from before the campaign or, for a platonic option, the twins were...twins from before the campaign, and both those relationships were still infinitely more complex and ever-changing and thoughtful over the course of their respective campaigns than whatever Imogen and Laudna were doing; it still, to be clear, would have been dishwater dull. But it would have been forgivably so; I would have simply politely lost interest episode 5 or whenever and moved on without saying much, whereas now there's a series of increasingly lowered bars in their wake.

So anyway, yeah. It sure is There.

[tigreblvnc]

BLUE LOCK MATCHUP — @anglefish3008

Your match is...

— Bachira Meguru

✦ Coco, you remind me of a disco ball.

✦ The kind that spins, spins endlessly, loves to party but only lights up at certain hours — at night.

✦ And I know the one who will dance with you at any hour of the day and night, whether you shine brightly or need to rest.

✦ 🐝🐝🐝

✦ Your likes section screams Bachira so loudly that I had no one else in mind :)

✦ What’s funny is that both of you radiate a very sunny energy on the outside. There’s a lot of liveliness in the way you carry yourselves, in your words. People sometimes tell you that you talk too much… That you think of too many random things with no connection…

✦ In this world, where most people can’t keep up with your creativity, it must’ve felt so refreshing to have found each other in the middle of this jungle we call society.

✦ Like, you saw each other, locked eyes… And you just knew.

✦ There are some connections that don’t need to be confirmed with words; they happen through the gaze alone. That little thing that turns two strangers into two best friends.

✦ You’re typically the kind of duo that people would think have known each other for ten years, even though you just met two hours ago.

✦ I also sense a lot of anxiety and uncertainty behind your sunny façades; it’s an aspect where you find common ground.

✦ "People tell me they can’t imagine me ever getting angry at someone or something." I can’t imagine Bachira falling into a similar state either. And in fact, I can’t remember it happening even once in the manga — it’s more about the fear of being abandoned rather than anger towards someone. Moreover, I think Bachira is more likely to direct anger towards himself than others.

✦ "It’s the best feeling to make someone smile or laugh in my opinion, it’s what I strive for!" This reminded me of the times when Isagi gets down because he can’t figure out a complicated situation. Bachira is often the one who comforts him, even indirectly, lighting up his mind and giving him the faith to rise again. Like you, Bachira is a little living, pocket-sized sun, fluttering from one place to another.

✦ Your endless source of optimism :)

✦ "He thinks his strong point is being optimistic and being able to have fun in any situation. He thinks his weak point is not worrying about things enough." Do I need to add more?

✦ The fact that you dance… I can only imagine Bachira LOVING it. Like, seriously, I see him doing breakdancing or hip-hop, street-style dancing.

✦ "LOVE CHILDREN AND IM AWESOME WITH THEM!!" Honestly, Bachira is still very much the child he was, who learned to survive school by playing football.

✦ "It’s yellow, I had to buy it." “Coco, that was 30 dollars.” “IT’S YELLOW I HAD TO BUY IT.” It’s my favorite color, and I’ve been told the color reminds people of me." ….. :D Need I explain?

✦ The connection with art is also obvious, and even though I don’t see Bachira spending a lot of time drawing like his mother, he certainly has the mindset. He’s very creative, free, original, loves doing things his own way, and follows his intuition. I think when he encounters someone who is sensitive to art, it’s already a sign to him that something good can happen.

✦ "My favorite animals are cats and orcas/any whale or dolphin." I think I’ve read the wiki of the entire Blue Lock cast at least once, and there are always a few elements that stick with me because they come a bit out of nowhere. The fact that the dolphin is also Bachira’s favorite animal…

✦ "We love to play video games and cry together when it has a sad ending." I’ve noted that Bachira is one of the few characters who openly admits to crying regularly. To me, this implies that he is very in touch with his emotions and doesn’t try to hold back. When it needs to come out, it comes out. His openness about his emotions makes him communicative, transparent, and truly honest.

✦ Your gray eyes… A passion for him.

✦ I quote: "He has a fetish for eyes. He thinks that they are where you can see a person’s heart the clearest."

✦ The fact that you share many common points gives you the advantage of knowing how to handle the other during moments of hesitation, discomfort, fear, or sadness. I see you as people who need emotional comfort rather than cold, logical solutions. You’re on the same wavelength in this regard.

✦ I see Bachira as a kind of little brother to you. I get that you have a very "best friends" relationship with yours, and I feel that’s the type of bond you have with Bachira. A strong and unbreakable connection.

✦ "Don’t know if you play Splatoon, but all Splatoon music is my favorite genre." I know the concept of this game, and I think it really fits Bachira’s aesthetic — very colorful, nervous, and fast-paced. This type of music suits him because it reflects his style of play.

✦ "Bullies are the worst."

✦ "Don’t really have a huge preference. I like all of them! Whatever way you like to express affection I will EAT UP." Bachira’s primary love language is physical contact, but I think it’s something he easily gives to anyone he feels comfortable with. We can also add quality time, as shown whenever he stays close to Isagi to give him a boost. On his end, he’s very much in need of words of affirmation! He’s a big baby who needs reassurance when he thinks his skills aren’t enough or when he’s stuck. It was even the absence of comfort that led him to a big down on the field during his match against Isagi.

✦ "My wallet is empty purely because I love giving anything and everything to the people I like." Hmm, can we talk about this detail in Bachira’s info… "He likes when he is given gifts, no matter what they are."

✦ And I keep saying this, but on a more astrological note, fire signs, in theory, tend to get along well because they adopt and understand a similar dynamic. Typically, Sagittarius for you and Leo for Bachira; this leads to an explosive, energetic relationship between two profiles who love to travel, try new things, laugh, have fun, and push themselves.

✦ OVERALL: you’re a bonfire in the hearts of your friends <3 even people who don’t know you well find you endearing, even if they think you’re a little weird. They might quietly whisper about your parents' presence in your upbringing but end up saying it doesn’t matter because, after all, you’re both radiant today.

✦ Bachira doesn’t read much, but he likes books with pictures. It’s more explicit, more alive for him. While you read sports manga indoors during the summer, he’s outside, living out everything you read through the pages. Your shonen in real time, visible from your window. And it’s funny, but that’s how you predict events happening to him.

✦ Summer being his favorite season, it’s the only real time of the year where everything opposes you. He prefers to exhaust himself under the summer sun, training his dribbles, making trips across the city to beat his record and improve his performance while you lay on the cool tiles, enjoying the chill indoors.

✦ When he comes back, he’s completely drained but with a huge, grand smile on his face because he had fun, and he plans to do it again the next day.

✦ Totally the annoying type who never closes the windows and lets everyone get eaten alive by mosquitoes.

✦ At the same time, he can never sleep when it’s that hot, so he watches movies with you. Lots of movies. And crying over sad films gives him the feeling of being less hot.

✦ Probably a soft heart when it comes to Titanic.

✦ And very sensitive to Dumbo, whose difficult situation reminds him of his own childhood. He always ends up in tears within the first few minutes of the film; it hurts so much.

✦ At the same time, you understand, and you don’t judge at all; you comfort him by taking him into your arms, letting him collapse onto your lap, even if it leads to an impromptu nap.

✦ But tomorrow is a new day, and that day belongs to football. For you, to dance.

✦ As you spend more time together, you start to pick up on each other’s athletic abilities. He begins to pull off crazy tricks on the field, inspired by your movements in the studio, while you become more and more creative and skillful with your legs, having followed Bachira’s training sessions.

✦ At some point, no one will be surprised to see him casually replace you during one of your sessions.

✦ I also think he gets along very well with children, and probably many of them adore him when he comes to see you at ballet. He’s the one around whom all the kids gather, and you always find Bachira with five kids clinging to him in all sorts of ways — on his back, his shoulders, and his legs.

✦ If he plays video games, it’s probably the ones where you have to move a lot physically, like Just Dance. All this to a pop-rock background while you coach him through the steps.

✦ Visit to the giant aquarium to watch the orcas and feed the dolphins…

✦ ^ His dream date.

✦ He spends the entire afternoon with his face pressed against the glass, watching the schools of fish. Curiously, Bachira is very quiet, so focused on the ever-moving display.

✦ When he speaks, it's to call you over and ask, "What's this species called? And that one? And that? And the one over there? Why is it doing that? Can it come up to the surface? How long can it stay underwater? Does it sleep with its eyes open?"

✦ You and him never leave this place.

"Coco?"

Bachira sticks his head through the doorframe but finds no one.   He doesn’t hear anything either.

In his arms, he holds a box with a closed lid.   Something seems to be moving inside.

"Coco, are you there?"

Usually, you're always here in the summer. You don’t like going outside, so… It’s easy for the bee to find you.   But not today.   Weird.   Where have you gone?

Still holding the box, Bachira heads upstairs. He walks past the bathroom and stops in front of your bedroom door.   He knocks and waits.   But nothing.   One minute,   two minutes…   Time stretches, and Bachira leans in to skillfully open the door with his elbow without dropping his package.

"Coco, it’s me."

Your silhouette appears, seated at your desk.   Bachira walks up behind you, smiling when he realizes your headphones are blocking out all sound.   He props the box on his left arm and gently pulls your headphones back, freeing your ears.

"Surpriiiiiiise!"   "Bachi!"   "I called you, but you didn’t hear me, so I let myself in. What are you up to?" "I’m listening to a new album that just came out, it’s pop, you might like it."   "Probably! Hey, I need to ask you something."   "What?"   "I was on my way back, and right after the bakery, I found this."

He places the box in front of you.   Intrigued, you spin your chair around and open the box, revealing three little furballs.

"Oh no… Kittens…!"   "I looked for their mom, but they were all alone, and it was really hot outside. I didn’t know what to do, but I know you like taking care of them."   "We need to call the vet. Can you get a towel? We’ll find them a cozy spot in my brother’s room."

He wasn’t home for the weekend, and until a more permanent solution could be found for the little ones, his room would become a refuge for the three little angels.

"Don’t worry, I got it. You think they’re hungry?"   "Hard to say, but they don’t look too skinny. Alright, I’m heading downstairs; I’ll be right back."

While you go to the kitchen to grab what’s needed, Bachira sets up a makeshift home for the litter, their tiny paws twitching in the air.   When you return with the supplies, Bachira is crouched down, watching the tiny felines, looking fascinated.

"So, how do they seem?" You ask. "I think they’re alright. The two small ones won’t stop fighting. The third one is still sleeping."   "That’s pretty strange, though. You said they were abandoned near the bakery?"   "Yeah. I didn’t see anyone around."   "I bet they haven’t been there long; otherwise, someone else would have picked them up. Their abandonment is probably very recent. Did you check if they were hurt?"   "The two seem fine, but I’m not sure about the one that’s sleeping. We’ll need to check the other side of its body. Did you call the vet?"   "No, I’m about to. Can you keep an eye on them for me?"   "Got it."

And while you were dialing the number,   Bachira leaned in a little closer to the lively trio.

These weren’t the first orphaned cats to end up at your place, and likely not the last.   Bachira looked over at you and smiled, whispering.

"What you do for them is really amazing, Coco."

A word about your match: A bee and a disco ball dancing under the sun :) By the way, I looked at your blog at the end of the matchup and: Did I meet a fellow Frenchie? :D

© TIGREBLVNC 2024 | SEPTEMBER ‘24 MATCHUPS EDITION.

[slasher-smasher]

Cassidy Bishops Info Sheet

Thank you @sehtoast for letting me use the outline for the sheet! I didn't use all the questions.

Cassidy Bishop

Link to google doc of more detailed version

Face claim: Alexandra Daddario

Age

Looks 37 (real age is 117, I tried making her age accurate so that she was in her late 30s in 1943, but the wiki for The Boys is wacky for timelines)

Nationality

British

Current residence

Manhattan (Apartment)

Occupation

Medical Doctor

Talents and skills

Fast Learner, Expert Surgeon, Art Sketching

Parent (describe relationship)

Her father was one of the top geneticist for the British government and worked along with Fredrick Vought when he defected to the Allied Powers. He is a strict man that loves his country and Queen (rip) to the extent that he would sacrifice his only daughter in the name of science and the benefit to Britain.

Significant others (describe relationship)

Ian Quinn - Journalist that covers wars and corruption. He met Cassidy when she moved back to England after she left Vought and tried to move on from her past.

Homelander/John- It's complicated. He is obsessed with her. She tries to keep him at arms length as just friends.

Relationship skills

Empathy, Patience

Height

5'8"

Weight

140lbs

Hair color

Brown with blonde highlights

Eye color

Lavender (Light Blue before Compound V)

Glasses or contact lenses?

Wears blue contacts when at work.

Skin color

Pale

Dress style

Casual mostly, but wears blouses and dress pants when at the hospital

Mannerisms

Even though she is a 117 year old doctor that has been through some shit, she is socially awkward when it comes to social situations.

Hobbies

Sketching, reading medical journals, listening to music while at the park, baking.

Favorite sayings/quote

"I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious." - Albert Einstein

Style

Comfortable

Greatest flaw

Her empathy. She allows people Homelander to manipulate her when she feels guilty.

Best quality

Kindness, strong ethics

Introvert or extrovert?

Introvert

Educational background

Many many MD degrees over the years and masters in psychology

Mental health

A bit traumatized by her injection of V by Vought and her father.

Short-term goals

Keep up D-grade supe status cover, save lives in the hospital,

Long-term goals

Bring Vought's corruption to light but not willing to join Billy's team and go to his extremes. Have a normal loving relationship, maybe a family.

How emotional is your character?

One would think being through 4 wars she would learn to hide away her feelings but Cassidy wears her heart on her sleeve. She gets super passionate about things.

How logical is your character?

Even though she is emotional her professional ethics are strong and is used during emergencies.

What would most embarrass your character?

She is subconscious about her age. Even though she is basically immortal, she hates the fact that she is twice peoples age. Being in the spot light.

How does the character deal with conflict?

Often uses logic.

How does the character deal with sadness?

Sketches, cuddle times with her Rottweiler.

What does the character want out of life?

A normal non supe life

What would the character like to change in his or her life?

Being a supe. Saving Homelander as a child from the lab.

What motivates this character?

To be opposite of her father. Help heal people without the cost of others.

What frightens this character?

Being taken to be experimented on. Letting people down. Not being able to heal people.

What makes this character happy?

Friends, her dog, baking, lots of tea (no it's not a British joke, I just LOVE tea)

Is the character judgmental of others?

Homelander is mainly the exception due to their history but yes when it comes to people like Stormfront and Vought higher employees in general. She HATES greed and manipulations.

Is the character generous or stingy?

Generous

Is the character generally polite or rude?

Polite but can be sarcastic.

Is religion or spirituality a part of this character’s life?

No.

What is this character’s role in the story?

Protagonist

Describe the scene where this character first appears

Cassidy was a nurse during WW2 that was forced to be injected with compound V. She worked with Solider Boys team for a bit and reluctantly stayed with Vought.

Consider this character’s relationship with other characters.

Homelander- almost motherly when he was a child, cared about him until he started to become more obsessed and sexually attracted to her when he hit his teens which made her leave due to ethical reasons. As an adult, awkward budding friendship with some sexual tension mixed in much later Maeve- acquaintances Starlight- later becomes friends

How does this character change over the course of your story?

She tries to be a moral and ethical person but her feelings towards Homelander that she starts to accept much later makes her bend her code a bit. She knows he is a monster but her guilt prevents her for seeing him as that completely.

Superpowers:

Longevity/ fast regeneration, super strength but she doesn't use it much.

[chilchacksarchive]

kano and ayano. lies down

[bisexual-queenie]

I have come back from writers block with another fun MHA AU (its not really too serious, this is all just for fun :) )

What if MHA characters were Strawberry Shortcake Characters (I would add pics, but Tumblr is being quite stupid so… feel free to google them, but I mostly got their personalities from the 2003 series, and I imagine that thats what their clothes would look like if they were in Strawberry Shortcake)

Deku: Strawberry Shortcake (Pretty Self Explanatory. Main character, One of the sweetest people you will ever meet).

Eri: Apple Dumpling (The little sister and liitle kid of the group. Also kinda self explanatory!)

Sero: Orange Blossom (I love Sero, I love Orange Blossom, perfect fit. Also its cannon that Sero likes Oranges!)

Momo: Peach Blush (“Momo” is the Japanese word for “peach”. In addition, her wiki says that “Peach is a delicate, generally nice and always polite southern bell. She can be a drama-queen sometimes and worries over the really simple things from time to time, even if nobody else has just yet.” Sounds like Momo!)

Bakugou: Pepermint Fizz (Peppermint and Bakugou are literally the same person lmfao. No but seriously, they share so many similarities, like their jealous and aggressive attitudes (especially to the main character), thats why I put them together)

Mic: Cherry Jam (Cherry Jam is the musician of the group, which to me fits Mic’s whole schtick)

Jirou: Ginger Snap (I could have made Jirou Cherry Jam, but she just fits Ginger Snap so much more, since they are the tomboys of their respective groups)

Shirakumo: Blueberry Muffin (Blueberry Muffin’s wiki says “Blueberry always tries to keep her friends in line and is almost always the first to admit her mistakes. Blueberry brings her sense and level-headedness to the group and really cares for her friends. That love for her friends helps her to be humble and modest and tells her that her friends mean more than anything to her.” That reminds me of Shirakumo very much)

Mount Lady: Lime Light (They act the same, and even had the same character development in their respective arcs. They also just look the same lmao).

Kamui Woods: Lime Chiffon (The wiki says she was the bubbly and kinda ditzy one, which kinda fits I think, but I just chose this for Kamui because he and Mount Lady could share the lime motif lmao)

Jeanist: Raspberry Torte (The wiki says Raspberry is “sarcastic and easily annoyed” in the 2003 version, and the 2009 version makes her a fashionista, so it kinda fits!)

Edgeshot: Lemon Meringue (Lemon’s wiki says “She is kind and caring to her friends and she always tries to work as hard as she can to make others happy”. She likes to chat and knows a bit of gossip, but she does never usually trifle with in anything that could hurt the feelings of someone else” which I think fits Edgeshot really well!)

Nighteye: Plum Puddin’ (Wiki says Plum Puddin’ is a prankster and loves to laugh. Need I say more :) )

Some extra notes:

- i couldn’t fit Aizawa, Midnight, All Might anywhere and Im so sad 😭

- Ok I have A LOT of notes about Best Jeanist and Edgeshot as per usual (im sorry i love these two so much) @wanderingchocolateeclair @quill-n come and get some Edgejeanist juice lmao

Raspberry Torte and Lemon Meringue are usually paired together in the series. They debuted together, and in the show they are best friends.

I wanted to share this quote from the wiki: “They used to live somewhere else until they moved to Strawberryland [Referring to Raspberry and Lemon]. They are often seen sitting together, or walking together and holding hands.” If this fact doesn’t fulfill my love for Egdejeanist I dont know what does.

Alright thats it for now! Thanks for reading! :)

[helisol]

answering the people’s prayers

quark is my poor little meow meow and here is why

me and a friend of mine came to the conclusion that the writers of ds9 accidentally put a seven seasons long tragic character arc into their show without realising and I need to share our findings with you. 

*full disclosure the writers for sure didn’t know what they were making but the result is still the same. tragedy.

now you may ask, is calling quark a tragic figure of epic proportions hyperbole? maybe! but also it really isn’t for two reasons:

first is that quark can’t win. throughout the entirety of ds9 he’s in a situation where he just constantly draws the short straw and loses things (and people) and he can’t make it better. those moments in the show probably don’t make the average viewer sad, like in a tragedy, but I’m hoping to unlock some elusive shrimp-color emotions in you with this rant.

anyway second there’s the fact that quark is,,, alone. not in the physical sense. mans literally runs a bar and has tons of friends Co-Inhabitants Of Deep Space Nine I mean nobody understands who and what he is with one notable exception and he can’t tell anyone either because that would defeat the purpose. what purpose is that? well it's complicated but let’s start with that.

in my quodo rant- which you dont have to read but like it might give you more insight on my personal brand of brainrot- I made the same observation that most people make when they look at quark which is “there’s something wrong with this rat bastard”

now many people say that and they mean “this small orange man is a douche and I don’t like him” and like okay you’re not looking at the big picture though

when I say “there’s something wrong with him” I mean this dude is literally repressing his personality and nature so hard that he’s turned it into a performance. into some weird art form. masking so much he made it impossible for anyone to really know his true self. he’s trying to be an ideal version of himself that does not and can not exist.

to quote myself- his own wiki page literally calls him “a compassionate and generous man by ferengi standards” which pretty much translates to “not really a good ferengi” quark is that, a people-person and he loves his friends but he pretends that he is Not any of those things because it's not what a ferengi should be.

and think about it. who needs to conform but the people who are not the thing they’re trying to conform to? who has to try really hard to be something except for people who are not that thing? quark is not a good ferengi but he feels the need to try so very hard to be one. 

he tries to conform to every little ideal and rule of acquisition that he grew up with even though 9 out of 10 times he fails. and still he tries to be the ferengi he is not. for what?

it’s a piss poor attempt of trying to hide who he is. he’s a ferengi who doesn’t know how-to-ferengi, but unlike the rest of his family, he hates that about himself.

his mother, brother and nephew all take a certain kind of pride in being #NotLikeOtherFerengi because they’ve found acceptance and love and support. ever notice how quark has pretty much none of those things?

rom has his engineering, a brilliant son, his mother’s love and a wife who adores him- and he ends up becoming the grand fuckin nagus!

what does quark have? well he doesn’t get his mother’s full support, his brother and the general public regard him as a ’loveable asshole’ at best, and even his actual friends don’t really think twice when talking shit about him.

quark, fundamentally, is the same as his family. he does not and can not be a good ferengi because it’s not in his nature. they’re simply built different. but unlike his family he wasn’t born with the understanding that that’s okay. 

he doesn’t think it’s okay to be different because when deviancy comes to light bad things happen to him. it started from when he got made fun of because of his mothers liberal attitude and it continued when rom got ripped off in the marriage contract situation because he fell in love (which Normal Ferengi don’t do) and brought further ridicule over their family.

even though it’s not necessarily true as demonstrated by his family’s success story quark believes that deviancy gets punished, not rewarded.

that’s the first tragic thing- he IS a deviant. he DOES care about his family and his friends and he wants to be loved and to have something to be proud of. profit is secondary to him. he just can’t admit it, ever.

it’s not that hard to piece together that quark genuinely doesn’t like himself. Ferengi Love Songs really highlights that with him becoming depressed after a big part of what helped him keep up appearances as ‘a good ferengi’, his commerce license, is taken away from him. 

everything he does in that episode is in service of a) getting that commerce license back and more importantly b) BEING COMFORTED. his life sucks at the moment! he would really like some support! 

he wants someone to hold his face and say “you know, it’s okay that your license is gone. you don’t need it.” because maybe if someone did that he could drop the act and stop trying so hard to be a good ferengi.

but what does he get? what does he have at the end of the episode? a minor conflict with his mother was resolved, but he has to keep up his performance. the charade never ends for him!

he can’t admit to anyone that he’s aware he’s different. he’s waiting for them to figure him out. and nobody ever does. because nobody cares for quark enough to really see him and go “I know what you’re doing, you can stop now”

...

except! for! odo!

this is not quodo rant 2.0 so I’m gonna keep this brief but odo does understand him. the problem is just that odo ALSO can’t admit that he’s not what he makes himself out to be. 

he sees what quark is doing but instead of saying “you can stop pretending now. we can both stop.” he uses quark as a way to keep up his own act.

in my mind there’s no talking about Quark without Odo since they’re both doing this performance of ideal selves together, but I’ll get back to that later.

so we can all agree that quark is in a very bad situation when it comes to how he feels about himself and the world around him. my friend described it as a reverse-corruption arc (or a straight up corruption arc from the ferengi perspective) in which quark, over the years, becomes more and more influenced by the hoo-mans. 

in and of itself this is a great arc, since he’s turning into a more moral person and it makes him an interesting character but what people may not consider is that it is AGONISING TO HIM.

he HATES his own character arc and he is being dragged through it kicking and screaming internally. quark literally says so in Ferengi Love Songs. I hear his delivery of “I’ve fought against it, I really have.” and I go ape shitt because that’s really just it huh. quark is fighting every step of the way to not show his real natural self to the world out of fear of getting hurt.

and the real tragedy is that nobody on the station notices or understands why he’s struggling so hard. except for one guy who is also his fucked up ‘partner in the struggle to hide ourselves’ and who he can’t talk to about his feelings because if he did it would be admitting that they’re friends and not just a cop and a criminal.

his family just says “well, why are you struggling, we’re also not good ferengi and we’re Fine” and his friends say “well, it would be good, actually, if you stopped acting like a ferengi”

and he is all. alone. with this struggle.

that’s tragedy baby.

but what is also tragedy is how this plays out in the actual show.

most of what I’ve said is like. subtext mixed with some visions I got from an angry god. but let’s discuss the fact that if you accept quark’s internal struggle as tragic his whole story becomes a tragedy.

I mentioned at the start that ‘Quark can’t win’- what that means is just that, like in any good tragedy, no matter what actions quark takes he ends up having to deal with negative consequences.

Jadzia, the only person who openly declared herself as his friend ignoring the weird romantic shit because fuck that and Odo who I WILL straight up call his love interest because we all hate rick berman here both just leave in some abstract sense.

jadzia ‘coming back’ as ezri means she’s not entirely dead, but she isn’t really as interested in him now. that hurts. their whole relationship is different and he couldn’t prevent it.

and with odo he did try to prevent it, I think. see my quodo rant where I go on about this in more detail but in the ds9 finale quark essentially goes “if you’re going to leave me, you better give me a real goodbye” in the hopes that maybe odo would either give him closure or just not go. but he does. he loses odo as well.

quark, the guy who said "I've made a career out of knowing when to leave" in the FIRST EPISODE watches as the most important people in his life just go away.

he’s been on ds9 for well over 20 years and he will stay for forever while everyone around him leaves.

am I the only one who thinks about this and just wants to punch a hole in the wall to feel manly again? like HELLO???

and this isn’t even mentioning all the shit he has to cope with in terms of material loss. you may think that losing people would be more important but remember this man has a masters degree in Pretending To Be A Ferengi because it's the only thing that he can hide behind.

quark spent his whole life acting like the perfect ferengi to fit into a society that would reject his true nature.

the fact that he has to try so hard still makes the society reject and punish him and it makes him miserable.

and if that wasn’t enough. when all the wars and all the great losses are over. the society starts to change because it’s now run by his brother.

everything quark used to define himself and tried to be a part of just starts to vanish in front of his eyes and he has to realise that, in the end, he denied himself all these years for NO REASON.

in the future, nobody will care if he fits the old ferengi ideals. in the future, the perfect ferengi is going to be the opposite of what quark pretended to be all this time. 

he can’t fucking win. no matter what he does fate or the universe or the wormhole aliens or his own mother will change the status quo to make quark unable to fit in.

do you see? do you see why he’s my poor little meow meow? it’s because this is a sad little man and whenever he tries to do what he thinks is right the world says ‘no actually we’ll be taking something you use to comfort yourself with you sad little man’

and the worst offender. I swear I’m not gonna talk about quodo for too long. is what the writers did with odo and him.

the writers probably did not think of quark as a tragic figure the way I do. how do I know? 

if the writers were aware that they were creating a tragic figure with an amazingly rich character arc and an insanely complex internal struggle… they would not have made it Quark. they would have used a generically hot alien. because honestly people who don’t have brainworm are not gonna appreciate this shit if the character they’re looking at is an orange capitalist gremlin with giant ears. I don’t blame them. but it is what it is.

so the writers wrote this incredibly cool thing on accident and also stuck the landing. 

because odo leaving… fucking hurts. 

even if you don’t view them as romantic which is fair you Have to see that quark and odos relationship is special. they’ve been doing this dance for decades at this point, and at the very end odo turns away from quark without a word.

in the moment where quark opens himself up just enough to allow odo to do the same he goes “welp, I’ll be on the runabout, see you never again” and like Yeah obviously it's because odo is still a repressed nerd who can't talk about his feelings but that doesn’t change the fact that this is perhaps the worst thing that could happen to quark.

like, it’s the first and only and last time he does it. even in The Ascent they don’t actually verbally confront the fact that their relationship is far more friendship-like than it is antagonistic. and in the finale there’s this opportunity where he takes action and goes after odo his best friend his enemy because he wants to have something before he too goes away forever-

and the writers said “but it doesn’t happen. he doesn’t get to have it.”

in summary I am rattling the bars of my cage. quark is so hot.

[laurenhufflepuff2]

A list of fandoms I'm in (in no particular order, will probably be updated regularly. Some fandoms are more intense and some are more casual. Depending on the fandom, I could go on and on about fandom topics for HOURS. Let's get into it!)

Harry Potter, Disney, Marvel, DC comics, Miraculous Ladybug, Avatar: The Last Airbender/The Legend of Korra, Star Wars, Literature, Winx Club, Nintendo, Minecraft, Little Witch Academia, Voltron, Coraline

Details:

Harry Potter- I got into Harry Potter in 7th grade and now I am the resident expert in my family and in my friend group. I read all the books, watched all the movies (notably the British version), and I've seen the Fantastic Beasts films as well. I've also read Tales of Beedle the Bard (the Warlock's Hairy Heart was traumatizing) along with the Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them textbook (plus an updated edition). I also read The Cursed Child script and while I mean no hate to anyone that liked it, I hated what it did to the canon. I am in Hufflepuff with some Ravenclaw tendencies (I took the Pottermore quiz 3 times, 2 out of 3 I got Hufflepuff, the other time was Ravenclaw). I had a pottermore account and I was so upset when it got converted to the Wizarding World page. I cosplayed Hermione in 7th grade complete with British accent and even monologued as her for a talent show (classmates and teachers would recognize me as the Hermione girl all the way through high school). I was obsessed and I still love it even if J.K. Rowling has gone off the deep end on Twitter... yeah... my favorite character is Hermione but I also relate to Luna

Disney- there's so much that goes into the Disney part of my fandom list. I'm excluding Marvel and Star Wars from this part as they were originally separate entities before Disney got the rights to them. I have seen almost every animated Disney film ever and often use random movie quotes in conversation. My favorite villain is Maleficent, my favorite princess is Ariel (followed by Belle, Rapunzel, and Anna). I relate to so many of the characters. I'm not sure who my favorite Pixar character is though (I love Violet, Sadness, Dory, and Piper (from the short)). My favorite Disney fairy is Fawn. My favorite characters overall are Ariel and Stitch. Disney is definitely on the list as one of my biggest obsessions. My favorite movies are Lilo and Stitch, the Little Mermaid, Inside Out, Alice in Wonderland (original), and The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh.

Marvel- I mostly get my Marvel exposure through the MCU, other movies, and animated TV shows. I have difficulty reading graphic novels so most of my comic book knowledge comes from friends, posts, or wikis. My favorite characters are Spider-Man, Captain America, Peggy Carter, and Scarlet Witch. I also like Gwenpool, Deadpool, Spider-Gwen/ Ghost-Spider, Venom, Squirrel Girl, Daredevil, Mantis, Gamora, Black Widow, Iron Man, Thor, Loki, Bucky, Black Panther, and most MCU characters. Out of the X-men I really like Professor X, Wolverine, Mystique, Magneto, Nightcrawler, and Quicksilver (either version- MCU or Fox).

DC- this was the franchise I was more familiar with growing up but again, graphic novels aren't easy for me to read so most of my knowledge comes from information pages about the comics or from tv/movies. My earliest experience with DC came from the 60s Batman series, with Catwoman and Robin being my favorites. I also watched the Wonder Woman series from the 70s and a handful of CW shows, my favorite of which being the Flash and Arrow. I also managed to watch all 5 seasons of the Teen Titans Cartoon Network series from 2003. With that being said, my favorite characters are Wonder Woman, Catwoman, Flash, Batman, Nightwing/Robin (Dick Grayson), Green Arrow, Starfire, Raven, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, and Alfred. I also like most of the bat family, and when it comes to CW I LOVE Caitlin Snow/Killer Frost and Cisco.

Miraculous- this is one of my guilty fandoms but since this is Tumblr I'm not too worried about it. I love Marinette and I relate to her on an astoundingly deep level (minus the stalking and obsession with potential lovers, that's creepy). If I had a miraculous, I'd probably want the Ladybug one, but the Cat miraculous, fox miraculous, and snake miraculous are good too. My favorite character is Marinette/Ladybug.

Atla/Tlok- I jumped on the avatar bandwagon just when it was starting to get popular, so I managed to get through the series before the memes took over everything. Same with Tlok, although i couldn't completely avoid the spoilers for that when i started it. I've been wanting to get into the comics because of the short story comics I've read, they seem easier to read than superhero comics. My favorite characters are Aang, Katara, Ty Lee, Iroh, Korra, Jinora, Asami, Suki, Appa, Momo, Naga, and Pabu. I also like Sokka, Mai, Zuko, Lin, Kuvira, Varrick, Zhu Lee, and Azula. I feel really sorry for her and while I understand that a redemption arc would undermine the importance of her corruption arc, I still wish she could have one. I would love to be a waterbender or an airbender... maybe a waterbender raised in the air nation? Obviously, being the avatar itself would be awesome. The show has taught me a lot of great lessons and put a lot of stuff into perspective for me.

Star Wars- oh boy, talking about this one is dangerous. I've seen firsthand the horrors of the Star Wars fandom but then again no one will probably see this anyway so... I've seen all the movies and I remember watching the clone wars series with my brother when I was younger but we fell wayyy behind and it's taking us forever to get back into it. I've also seen the Mandalorian and quite enjoyed it. I like the prequels unironically, in fact, the prequels are some of my favorite movies. I especially like how they switched from lightsabers being heavy weapons to light weapons that can be used for all kinds of tricks that make for epic battles like the ones we see in Revenge of the Sith. The sequels were fun to watch but when I would analyze them along side their predecessors, I came to the conclusion that, for me, they were good to watch but did not do anything good for the rest of the franchise. My favorite characters are prequels/clone wars Obi Wan and Anakin, Padme, Ashoka, Leia, R2D2, BB-8, R4-P17, the Mandalorian (Din Djarin), and Grogu. If I had a lightsaber I'd want it to be blue, but when I was little I got a purple one like Mace Windu because it was closer to pink and I was into pink at the time. I still have that lightsaber and none of my friends have a purple one so it's one of my flexes. I feel like I wouldn't make a good jedi because of attachments being forbidden, so I'd probably become a grey jedi.

Literature- this is a broad term I use to cover all the random books and stories I liked reading and have studied. So we have Shakespeare (Macbeth, Much Ado About Nothing, Romeo and Juliet), The Great Gatsby (bored while reading, loved to analyze), Grendel (HATED reading, loved to analyze, Grendel really needed a hug and a friend), The Crucible, Fahrenheit 451, Dark Life (+ the sequel Riptide, both are by Kat Falls good reads, sci-fi and kind of dystopian), The Once and Future King

Winx Club- I think the show is trashy but I still love watching it. I haven't been able to get through season 6 though and I hated what they did with season 8 and Fate: the Winx Saga. My favorite character is Bloom along with Stella and Flora. I prefer rai to nick. My favorite transformations are magic winx, enchantix, and harmonix. My favorite member of the Trix is Icy followed by Darcy. My favorite Pixies are Chatta and Lockette.

Nintendo- mainly Pokémon above all else, followed by Animal Crossing. I have also played (mostly as player 2 or just never beat or watched my brother play) mario games, legend of zelda, pikmin, and kirby. Games I haven't played but I just liked the characters/the lore and probably learned about through Super Smash Bros. are Fire Emblem (Lucina mostly), Metroid (Samus and baby metroid), and Kid Icarus. Pokémon is where I'm most knowledgeable but you'll most likely beat me in battle. I am however great at MarioKart and I always destroy my friends at it. Terrible at fighting games though.

Minecraft- I like playing this casually. Sure, I'll play for hours and hours on end for months, but I prefer to stay exclusively in peaceful when playing Survival mode and I don't make anything too ambitious in Creative mode. I like to write, so sometimes I'll make a rough layout of the settings of my stories in different worlds. I prefer interior design and decorating when building, and when in survival mode I focus more on mining and gathering while my brother works on ambitious building projects. I just bring him the raw materials and furnish the interior when he finishes the outside.

Little Witch Academia- this takes up a smaller portion of my fandom list because there were only 2 seasons and a couple movies and I watched the whole series years ago, but I still enjoy it. At one point I wanted to cosplay Akko, and I loved the nod at Twilight through the Nightfall series. And I especially liked the twist that Shiny Chariot was Ursula, which I suspected for some time. The blend between magic and technology was fun to see, but I was so sad that the series ended RIGHT when Akko finally showed signs of magic proficiency. Also, Shiny Chariot being the reason Akko couldn't do magic was heartbreaking.

Voltron- this takes up a much smaller portion of my fandom list mainly because I haven't even finished it. I know hardly anything about Transformers aside from the Bumblebee movie so to me I just watch it for fun. It reminds me of power rangers, star wars, and star trek, and then there's just a transformer insert. But I don't know anything about Transformers so maybe the show is more rooted in canon than I think.

Coraline- I am in a love-hate relationship with Coraline. I have watched the movie several times, I've read the book, I've watched hours of theories and analyses on youtube, I've watched behind the scenes videos by Laika, and I even wrote a script for a fan film parody. I am amazed at how original the story is and how impressive the stop motion animation is but I also have recurring nightmares from it and it scares me/creeps me out to the max. If anyone asks what my scariness limit is, it's definitely Coraline.

[chibi-encubierta]

Trials of Mana, Session 8: “The heels of three brave souls--lost in the fabric of time-- could be heard clacking on the Mirage Palace’s lonely pavement...” 

yup that’s is one of the last quotes of Heroes of Mana... But I forgot to put it when I first go to Pedda, so decided to changed it a bit... Because of reasons and

yes Luna, let’s go back to Trials of Mana. =============== I saved right before finding the Shadowstone, so I'm going to try again to defeat Zable Fahr without buying anything or grinding, this time I will not stop to take screenshots.

- (Ok I lied! but this was important) Kevin can smell attacks!!? I think this is the 2nd time he mentions it. So yeah, Kevin can smells attacks, I repeat, Kevin can smell attacks!

YES! I defeated it! it was a liiittle bit hard but manage to win this time!! ===============

- The team keep going and they use the Esina/Anise’s Illusion mirror (it is bigger than I remember) and I’m still loving that you don’t have to guess what to do with what in certain areas and transformed it into cutscenes,and now I can FINALLY fight Goremand!! >:(

I don’t want to see YOUR FINAL FORM! I want to keeeeeeel you!!! >:(

- I’m just avoiding all the damage to read the dialog between Goremand and Kevin. This exchange would look so good in an anime, Then "Will punch out all the souls of out you" OMG KEVIN I LOVE YOU MY SON!!! YOU ARE DOING GREAT!

- Goremand uses his special attack on Kevin and... Want to eat his soul?? REALLY?? AGAIN!!?? NOW IM PARALIZED!! Changed to Charlotte by accident and she got stoned!, AAHHHHHHHHH the clock is ticking!!!

Best friend Riesz: I WILL RESCUE YOU BEST FRIEND, LEAVE IT TO ME!!!! *hits the Real Goremand* OMG SHE REALLY SAVED KEVIN!!!! before I could control her!!! BEST FRIENDS INDEED!!

I’m having so much fun with this battle! :D like a real good time beating this guy. AAAANNNND HE IS FINALLY DOWN!!!!  woooooott!!

wait... WHAAAT!? I’m not going to complain, It was a good battle. Moving on!  =============== Finally got into Mirage Palace! And Kevin is worried about the team “take care, this place could be full of traps”, awww.

- Ahh yes, the 6 paths before the real deal... Wait... I don’t remember this Tomatoman saying what to do in this part. Mmmm... Interesting. - I remember there is an “chronological order ” if you want to make them in the same way as they happen in the game but I’ll do them at random. Beuca Island and Kaiser Mimic; and then

(screenshot 100 :O!) - They made the Karl part a lot easier!!! I remember that sometimes he didn't appear and you have to just keep going around and around and around... I can actually recall a gameplay with my brother in which he never appeared and we dropped that run :(

And it was kiiiiindaaaa cute that Charlote called Kevin as "Kevin-chan"  and told him this is a trap, like yeaaaahhhh you should remember that Karl is with your father, no? And he almost fell for it! - Now I’m curious, what happens in this part if you bring a team without Kevin? (like... Charlotte, Riesz, Duran) would they go “ohh look, a random wolf puppy! Well let’s keep going?” Will try that later in another run.

OH NONONONONON, NOT YOU AGAIN!!!! I FORGOT ABOUT THIS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (actually this time I really enjoyed this fight, didn’t die a single time and knew exactly what to do)

===============

- Not suspicious at all “I’m a fellow human, human fellas. Keep going.” If I knew how to write fanfics, I would totally write one of angst/hurt about this Astoria illusion, a little guilt trip of Kevin as being part of the beastman and he couldn’t stop the destruction of this town, how everyone in this illusion blames him and that he should have been the one who died, idk add a little Ludgar is also “dead” because of me, etc. And then some light and warm about how his friends,  mayyyyyybe Charlotte or another character saying “No, you are wrong!/snap out of it!” and then... like his best friend Riesz(or another character) makes him see that this is not real, he has friends and things can be different now with Ludgar, etc.

if anybody want to do it, go ahead and tag me or if you know of a fic like this tell me and feed me this cheesy and corny writing!!!

=============== 

I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THIS OTHER BOSS FIGHT!!! It... It seems that my memories of the Mirage Palace are kinda... distorted? IDK, I don’t remember a lot of these illusions.

===============

Totally ok and not creepy, this is completely fine. (The mirage Palace is a lot creepier than I remember).

=============== 

The puppy likes places with environmental enrichment, but not too much or he gets stressed (also maybe still feeling a little bit down for the Astoria illusion?)

(and character says something to cheer him up?)

=============== Really Tomatoman? REALLY?? You deserved to die for that.

I ALSO TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THIS OTHER BOSS FIGHT!! (Kevin went from “Nobody is going to stop my revenge! Revenge for Karl!!” to “Nobody is going to stop me from saving the world! For Karl!” can he be more pure? (wait... attacking the shadow on the ground actually stuns Gorba??!! I didn’t know in the first battle!!!) =============== - I FEEL LIKE AN IDIOT!!  I didn’t notices the cues on the statues and background and ended up in the wrong teleporter 7 times!!!

There he is, the Father of the year

So... Like... Shadow the Hedgehog?

- Suddenly, Charlotte is the main character, and I’m Ok with it.

AANNNND HERE COMES THE FEELS

                                            You said it gurl!!!

Omg Charlotte landed the last hit with her Class Strike, now this got more sad... The whole Mirage palace became a feel trip (including my headcanon Astoria illusion fic)

For more info about the priest and the cooler priest  of Wendel, search a wiki about Belgar, don’t play the forbidden game.

Unless you use Heal Light Turn Undead/Undead Away on him... But I'm pretty sure they removed that option in this remake. EDIT: for some reason I wrote “Heal Light” instead of “Turn Undead” and after a quick search the Spell is in fact in the remake so, Charlotte is still the queen that can slay the dark lich with no problem. She is to be feared, she is more powerful than satan itself.

This is way more sad than I remember... Even Riesz and Kevin are sad as hell :( =============== Next session: End-Game and Post-Game! (I think)

[the-dark-kings]

In light of the show’s cancelation, to spread some love and happiness, we’re doing @highkingfen’s The Magicians meme too!

1. Favorite Main Character

M: I refuse to choose between Eliot and Margo. I picked them as my faves years ago when I watched season 1 and I never changed my mind. I could never get bored of these two.

N: Penny Adiyodi, Margo Hanson, and Eliot Waugh. As much as this question is asking for only one character, I will not pick just one. These characters have been my top 3 from the start, and that hasn’t changed.

2. Favorite Side Character

M: There’s so many good ones. Jane, Fen, Zelda, Harriet, Fogg… I guess I’ll go with Fogg this time. There’s so much more to him than meets the eye, and Rick Worthy’s dry delivery never fails to crack me up. I’m gonna miss him.

N: Watching Dean Fogg has been a wild ride, and he never fails to entertain me. I also absolutely adore Fen, and am so pleased that she got to be her own person while never losing her kind and bubbly side.

3. TV Trope Showed In The Show

M: No Budget: Any time they make a joke about not having money for something, like with the invisible castle, or both Blackspire and the Fairy Castle just being the Whitespire set. Love it when the show gets self-aware.

N: Hard questions. There’s so much I love, there’s so much that makes the show fun and unique. But the tropes I love the most are related to genre de/construction, because it demonstrates how self-aware the tv-show is. An example of this is the subversion of “the chosen one” trope in 1x13 or the call-out of (fantasy) books having only one kind of protagonist, emphasizing the importance of other kinds of representation in 4x06.

4. Favorite Bunny News

M: “Eat my ass.”

N: “Eat my ass.”

gif by @highkingfen

5. Favorite Plot Twist

M: I still vividly remember watching 4x05 with my darling co-host of this blog and having to pause the episode because we wanted to speculate on what Eliot’s worst memory might be. We got it wrong, but it was some of the most fun I’ve had watching an episode. And 4x13 was one hell of a twist, though I’m not sure I’d classify that one as ‘favorite’.

N: Alice being the chosen one. There might be better or more fun ones, but this one was meaningful to me because I kept wondering throughout the season “why Quentin?” So when it wasn’t him, it made me think that this show could be different from other fantasy shows. It was compelling.

6. Favorite Quote

M: Alice: Being an adult doesn’t mean that you have to throw away what you used to love. Quentin: Then what does it mean? Alice: Seeing the world through new eyes.

N: I suppose I’ll pick a poignant one to highlight this show’s depth instead of a silly one. Quentin: "The Madness Maker didn't play for the joy of winning, just the fear of losing. The real curse was, he only played when he could win, which cut him off from the surprise, horror, sadness, and wonder of life. Jane saw only one way out for him: Stop playing. Start living."

7. Funniest Pun Or Geek Related Joke

M: Margo and Eliot’s undercover pop culture dialogue scene. “Whatever your Marsden would XOXO, Cersei XOXO’s, so we have to keep it very best episode of Buffy.” Did I mention I love El and Margo?

N: The whole conversation my wonderful co-host mentioned above. I felt so close to Margo and Eliot in that moment (pop culture as a secret language), and I also love that it revealed how often Eliot scans wiki-pages to keep up with his Bambi. If that ain’t love.

gif by @magiciansladies

8. Favorite Outfit

M: Everything created for the Fillory royals. The costume department are geniuses, truly.

N: Definitely the Fillorian costumes for Margo and Eliot for creativity and beauty. Penny’s low-cut tops for ridiculousness, beauty (good cleavage), and the link to his culture.

9. Favorite Music

M: Take On Me. I didn’t appreciate it when I first watched the episode because it kinda got buried underneath… everything else, but it is such a gorgeous cover and I’ve found myself returning to it often.

N: I don’t know what it’s called, but there’s an instrumental melody that’s often used during emotional or tense scenes in the show. I really love it. That, to me, stands for The Magicians on an auditory level. Besides that, “Beautiful Dreamer” sang by Summer Bishil.

10. Underrated Moment

M: From season 1, The Writing Room, that scene after they get out of the Plover house and Alice wants to go back inside to save the ghost children, and Eliot is so cruel to her. Not because Eliot is a dick, but because it was the first glimpse I got as a fan of what this show could be at its best. Layered, emotional, and asking the tough questions.

N: I wouldn’t necessarily call it my favorite, but it’s underrated and definitely something I’ll never forget. In season 2, Cheat Day, when Quentin and Emily sleep together donning the visual representation of their respective ex(/dead) lovers... that was the type of fucked up shit I live for in fiction. So messy, so ugly, so painful—I’m pleased The Magicians never shied away from any of it.

[vidaflxwer]

norman!! of course :-)

ahhhh thank you so much for giving me an excuse to heavily dote on norman, i appreciate it!

(this post got insanely long the more i worked on it i am so unbelievably sorry in advance, i just have a lot of thoughts and feelings about my son)

favorite thing about norman: what isn’t there to love about norman is the real question? how caring he is for absolutely all of the kids? his ridiculously precious laugh? that gentle smile he always gives everyone to make them feel better? how he made sure, before he was gonna get shipped out, that emma knew of ray’s plan and could stop it because he didn’t want either of them to die if he was going to? i could go on and on. there’s so much to this kid that you can love, but i will say at the end of the day, my favorite thing about norman was how his only wish was to live a happy life with emma and ray. like can we all just take a moment to appreciate how unbelievably wholesome that is? even when he was that little, while emma wanted to get outside to ride a giraffe and ray wanted to see art museums (i believe that’s what the wiki said, please correct me if i’m wrong), norman just wanted to live with them. he loved his best friends that much already at that young of an age and i think that’s absolutely my favorite thing about him. he never really wanted much out of his life, he just wanted to be with the two people he loved more than anything and i think that’s so underappreciated? and i think it makes all of the moments the trio spends together even sweeter, because you know that’s where norman’s at his happiest. whether it be playing tag with emma or washing dishes with ray or doing chores with the both of them, norman’s just glad to be able to live with them. and that just kills me.

least favorite thing about norman: the way that he’s so willing to sacrifice himself for everyone he loves. i do love it because it makes him such a complex character - especially when you take into account that all he wants to do is live - but it shatters my heart every single time when i think about it. i guess it’s not really my least favorite thing about him, because, in all honesty, i don’t really think i could have a least favorite thing about him. i think it’s just that i know what that feels like all too well and i don’t want norman to have to suffer like that. i know i made a whole post about this on his birthday but i always wished that the promised neverland had existed when i was younger and i’d been able to find it, since i needed a character like norman in my life. i know it would’ve been so comforting for me back then to have been able to read about him. and i think this is why i cried so hard when norman finally gave up his william minerva persona. because it really is a hard thing to do, to rely on other people, when all you want to do is protect them. when all you want is for them to look at you and know that they don’t have to worry about you for a second, and that you’ll take care of everything for them. it hurts me how much i could relate to that personally. i just wish norman had learned sooner that he doesn’t have to become a god, so to speak, because it is such a hard lesson to learn and one that has an epiphany i think the promised neverland captured perfectly. so that’d be my least favorite thing about him, but i still really appreciate that his character is like that because, while i don’t want him to suffer, it resonated a lot with me. 

favorite line: you see, norman has pretty much all of my favorite quotes in the entirety of the promised neverland, so picking a single one has always been really hard. back when i read the original translation, my favorite quote used to be “even if i do have the devil to pay, i don’t mind” which is no longer how that quote actually goes, unfortunately, but i loved it so much. though “bring this neverland to and end” and “that’s why i can smile as i go to meet my death” are a few of my other favorites! there’s so many more but this post’s going to get so ridiculously overwhelmed if i talk about all of them so yeah! 

brOTP: i’ve talked to my sister about this before but norman and gilda deserve to interact more because i know, i just know, that if norman had escaped with them, he and gilda would’ve been the emma protection duo. like just imagine the two of them scheming ways to keep emma safe behind the scenes. i think it’d be the absolute cutest thing in the entire world so yeah, norman and gilda! i’m really sad they never got that many interactions with each other in canon but there’s always fanfiction so i’ll probably have to remedy that asap. i could also just imagine them lovingly talking about emma for hours and hours on end, just sighing with each other like, “isn’t she the best?” while ray’s just there in the background like, “why are you two like this?”. i’d also like to imagine gilda sometimes coming to norman for help when it comes to studying for the daily test and norman helping teach her in the library, and emma eventually coming in and joining in. i saw fanart once of norman with his arm around gilda so i feel like that’s what fueled this wholesome friendship but i wish they could’ve been closer friends. thank you for coming to my mini ted talk. 

OTP: as much as i adore norray, the dynamic of noremma is really interesting to me and that adds a whole other layer of angst to it so i’d have to say noremma, if i had to pick one? but i love norray too. i think, for me, what was really appealing about shipping noremma when i first started shipping it wasn’t the obvious “because i love her” in the translations i read back then, but more so the scene before norman gets shipped out when he’s talking about how much he admires emma? and i believe in the letter from norman light novel, there was a section where norman talked about wanting to be more like emma and i think that’s just really ridiculously precious and hurts, in more ways than one? because he wants to believe in emma so badly but, at the same time, has this fear that her idealism might not be enough to save her in the end but if he could, he would be more like her. i think i touched upon this briefly in a fic i wrote once but i think that one of the reasons norman stopped taking that medication that was supposed to suppress whatever was wrong with him at lambda was because he didn’t want to live to see the aftermath of what he’d done to hurt emma. that’s another reason i think that his “i’ll gladly become god or the devil, emma” line is so interesting because she only ever says “you don’t have to become a god”. but he knew that his actions would hurt her, and while it seemed like in that moment he didn’t care, it was clear that he did. okay i didn’t mean to make this a whole analysis for their dynamic but basically, read my fic blindsided if you really wanna get the full understanding of why i think they’re such an interesting ship. and why norman’s love for her breaks my heart into a million pieces. 

nOTP: i can’t really think of any, off the top of my head? i’m pretty lenient when it comes to ships, especially with the promised neverland, i’ve realized. i don’t know why because i used to be like, “this ship is the only good ship and actively avoid content of every other ship” but nah. especially with norman, so long as my boy’s happy and loved, that’s all i care about. 

random headcanon: i have so many random headcanons about norman but this post is getting really long so i’ll just say my favorite one! it’s that norman, back at gracefield, used to be the designated bedtime storyteller. before the anime even aired, i always headcanoned that norman had this very sweet, soft voice that would lull the kids easily to sleep so i think that might’ve been where this one stemmed from. plus i’d like to think that norman just has a natural talent for storytelling. i don’t know why but i feel like he’d be able to create the most beautiful stories right on the spot and now i feel like i’m almost starting to write a fanfic so i’ll stop there but yeah! feel free to ask if you want more though because i have way too many headcanons for this boy. 

unpopular opinion: i have no idea what in the heck is an unpopular opinion about norman to begin with. is saying that i liked when people used to draw him with blonde hair an unpopular opinion? can hair color even be an unpopular opinion? i don’t really know how to answer this question because i don’t know what’s an unpopular opinion about norman so i’m sorry! 

song i associate with norman: sinking man by of monsters and men as of late has been my go to norman song, but lover, please stay by nothing but thieves was my original norman song. when he’s with his lambda squad though, do it all the time by i don’t know how but they found me is the perfect chaotic norman song. there

favorite picture of norman: pretty much every single picture of him smiling because it genuinely makes me sob tears of joy to see my son happy but, by far, my favorite picture has to be this one. nothing, and i mean nothing, will ever top the amount of tears i’ve shed over this panel and how ridiculously happy it makes me because just look at him! look at how happy he is! i remember the day this chapter came out and this panel broke me in the best way so it will always, always remain as my favorite picture of norman for as long as i live. 

[silver-shores]

Thanks to @pinehutch​ for the mention- this was fun!

Birthday: July- my favourite month! Not for the obvious reason (cake), but because it falls right the middle of winter, which is very mild here. This means: fresh mornings, cool gold light, strawberries, dizzyingly bright stars, and the daytime sky about 3 shades further towards impossibly blue. 

Zodiac: Cancer sun, Aquarius moon, Scorpio ascendant. I love Whitman’s lines about containing multitudes and self-contradiction because I relate to them on a cellular level. I love astrology and use it as a tool for introspection, and also I hold firmly the belief that in the end we are the masters of our fates and willfully choose our actions. NO, I WILL NOT CRY AT VIDEOS OF BABY ANIMALS just because I’m a Cancer! I will cry about something sensible, like the sad dragon looking through the windows in the Pete’s Dragon remake (it was so sad! so! sad!).

Last song listened to: breaking rocks in the HOT SUN I fought the law and the LAW WON I fought the law and the (clap) LAW WON! (the clash version)

Hobbies: Art- I’m getting back into it after a sort-of-break and am astounded by how much more myself I feel after contemplating the light of the world // Writing - something I’m trying to work on very slowly and for myself // Reading (I relate to Aziraphale in reaching the world through story on a level that gets me emotional if I think about it too much) // Music! (listening to + also playing it myself) // Being in nature- I’m spoiled with an abundance of wildish places in every direction, and Finding Good Rocks is a duty I take very seriously // Stargazing - I know a few constellations but I partake mostly in the spirit of being awed at the terrifying/comforting magnitude of space // Crochet - I taught myself when I was a kid and kind of take it up seasonally. I’m starting a jumper soon - the stylistic goal is ‘very jumbly’.

Last movie watched: I honestly have no idea. I wanted to watch portrait of a lady on fire but I missed the cinema release run. 

Dream job: I’m finally happy to not really be sure of this one. Something that combines Making Stuff with Being Useful. 

Meaning behind url: @pinehutch​ - your answer to this was phenomenal. Mine is not an interesting story at all. Alas! I always blank out on not very important decisions like this, so I just forced myself to pick something fast before I decided not to worry about making an account (it’s happened before!). I tend to visualise my inner self as a kind of liquid mess of emotions & thought tangents: the stranger seas within. Of course, a shore is where the ocean meets the rest of the world! Viola! Silver is one of my favourite words and colours, and is a slightly more alliterative stand-in for the idea of moonlight and nighttime in general (I love the late night and may or may not be found on occasion whispering sweet/sad nothings to the moon, a personal hero of mine. I am a cliche.)

Top 4 ships: I am listing these without their official ship names, primarily because I do not know them. • Aziraphale & Crowley •• Villanelle & Eve Polastri ••• Vasa, a literal ship: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vasa_(ship) •••• Ernie & Bert 

Reading: I am at the start of Maria Popova’s incredible Figuring. I borrowed it from the library but decided two chapters in that it absolutely required re-reads and annotations and plenty of time for digesting, so bought it instead. I’ll probably share some little quotes from it on here as I go. I also found the Hitchhiker’s Guide original radio scripts and Earthsea I, II & III at a book fair awhile ago and they’re next. Lots of fic as well! I’m awful at commenting because I AM TOO WORRIED ABOUT EVERYTHING ALWAYS but am going to make a monster of a fic rec list soon. 

What foods are you craving right now?: Oh! Easy! Some nice cheese. It’s always cheese. 

I don’t know the etiquette of tagging people here (do we need to have spoken? How many people do you list? Are there rules?) So- if you follow me, consider this your official invitation! Seriously- I’d love to hear about you.

[hcpefulmarshmallow]

I wanted to take some time out of our irregularly scheduled content to talk about something near and dear to my heart: Komaeda’s voice. Specifically, two of his character songs which I have been more eager to dissect than you know. 

A couple of points before we begin:

These songs were not written by the same people who designed, scripted or even localised Komaeda, but rather his Japanese VA, Megumi Ogata. It has, however, been sanctioned as canon material, even released under the Danganronpa brand. Therefore, I will treat it with the same consideration that I do explicitly canon material.

The songs are, of course, in Japanese. I do not speak this language, so I’ll be going off the translations available on the DR wiki. If you do speak Japanese and you realise I’ve missed or misinterpreted something due to the language barrier, please let me know. Otherwise, as an English speaker, I’ll do my best with what I have. 

My goal here is to reconcile his musical characterisation with his canon characterisation, as well as extrapolate whatever new things we can learn from these songs about our beloved boy. And if you’re reading this crazy long post and thinking, “wow, she’s reading way too into this,” ... yeah. That’s sort of the fun of it. My goal isn’t to challenge anybody, or shame anyone’s headcanons. This is just a weird niche hobby of mine.

Apologies for the lack of a cut. This much text, I felt, might be a little hard on some peoples’ eyes on my theme. It is tagged though.

Okay, onto the good stuff.

 Zettai Kibou Birthday is, according to Megumi, a song about how Nagito feels on the “outside”. It contains a literal narrative and a metanarrative which is a word I like to use to sound smart, but in this case, just refers to an overarching interpretation that isn’t necessarily verbatim, but rather is represented, or is provided a structure, or is given meaning by the actual text. 

 In this case, the literal narrative is this: Nagito meets somebody on campus he was “born to meet”, and they have some sort of steamy rendezvous, and in amongst all the smooshing, there are several references to absolute hope. However, the song isn’t supposed to be a literal recount of events, but rather an expression of Nagito’s feelings; about hope, love, intimacy and connection. This is the metanarrative. The plot, if you will, is simply a presentation of that message. 

 While the song functions on a conceptual level and not a physical one, it interests me that sex is the medium through which he allegorises hope, intimacy and interpersonal connection. I think it’s also interesting that hope and intimacy are grouped together, as if to find one is to find the other. To quote Nagito himself, “Now that I’m on the verge of death, I’ve finally realised what I wanted all along: somebody’s love.”

 Again, the song isn’t literal. It captures a feeling, likening that exhilaration and comfort of making a deep and impossible connection to the feeling of finding Ultimate Hope. And for someone who has been so lonely for so long, it makes sense he would find that hope in another person. Someone who isn’t afraid to be close to him in every possible sense of the word. 

 Now let me get it out there - I don’t expect a song like this to have explicit depictions of sex or anything. There is a fine line to walk when using the topic in media lest you be branded with a hard “lewd” rating, but there’s still no shortage of ways to use it without being explicit. Take, for instance, Carla Gugino & Oscar Isaac’s cover of Love Is The Drug. (Why the cover and not the original? Because I actually liked Sucker Punch, fight me.)

Late that night I park my car / Stake my place in the singles' bar / Face to face, toe to toe / Heart to heart as we hit the floor Lumber up, limbo down / The locked embrace, the stumble round / I say go, (and I say yes) / Dim the lights, you can guess the rest

 The words describe literally what is going on, while still invoking the right mood and the emotions the characters in the song were feeling. It’s very well-balanced lyrically, especially with what Oscar and Carla’s performance brings to it. Contrast, if you will, with:

So lock up, mix up, cut up… key up, sex up, wrap up /  I'll let you mess me up and indulge  That's it, break up, use up, end up… hook up—because we're connected / The omen of hope after the worst disaster

 If you look close, you can definitely see what’s happening in the actual narrative of the song. However, the details are more or less obfuscated under this layer of words that don’t really mean anything on their own. It’s more like a flurry of different sensations rather than one, tangible experience. These feelings he’s having during these experience are, in the next breath, directly correlated with connection, and then hope. 

 Nagito is a guy who works on the conceptual and the philosophical more than the literal. Even in canon, he’s heavily into symbolism. He likes to carry around Go stones because of what the colours represent to him. So this use of intimacy and word play to describe a significant bond between two people is remarkably fitting. What’s literally happening isn’t half as important as what is going on beneath the surface, and the way it makes him feel. 

 Like I said, it’s interesting that, of all the ways he could express hope and connection, this is the one he went with. I do believe that this also expresses an underlying attitude towards intimacy; that it’s something he only wishes to share with someone truly special. In many fan circles he is portrayed as a highly sexualised character, even though in the canon media, he is quite chaste, never taking any sexual interest in a situation that isn’t sexual; for instance, any of the many times Mikan falls over herself and winds up in a suggestive pose. (And nor should he, let me stress.) 

 And I can already foresee the counterargument that Nagito is gay, so of course he won’t enjoy seeing a girl’s underwear; and to that, I have two points. One is that, personally, I disagree. This doesn’t have to matter, but I headcanon him as bi or pan, possibly even demi. Either way, I don’t believe gender plays a major role in who he is attracted to. There’s no canon evidence to say who is “right” here (as right as anyone can be regarding fiction), but I don’t judge. If that’s your interpretation, you do you. The second is that, even towards the characters he is shown to be attracted to (namely, Hajime) his expressions of interest tend to be pure, for lack of a better word. Yes, there’s the joke about stripping naked on the beach, but I’m pretty sure that’s just a joke. He does tend to play a lot, after all.

 And let me be clear -- there is nothing wrong with being a sexual person, or expressing one’s desire’s healthily. And certainly, Nagito has that side to him. He absolutely has sexual interest, urges and whatnot. It’s just not a highly key component to his characterisation. The point I want to make is: this song was a really good method to explore his feelings towards intimacy in a natural way, as well as provide more depth and context to attitudes he expressed in canon but couldn’t be explored to their fullest because, you know, it’s a story about murder, not Nagito’s feelings. The way he groups hope, love and sex as this euphoric thing, a singular whirlwind of emotions rather than separate happenings, is telling toward this desire he has for these things, the way he sees them as interconnected, and, with the way the song is so upbeat and uplifting, his hope that he can achieve it. 

 Nagito is someone who strongly believes in the idea that people are born a certain way, either hopeful or hopeless, talented or untalented. In short, destiny. And in this song, he speaks directly to the person he believes he’s destined for.

In the school campus at midnight, my heart throbs as I continue waiting "I was born for the sake of meeting you" I’II think at the moment

 This song puts a tangible goal on this “Absolute Hope”, rather than the vague “overcoming Despair” thing he talks about all the time. Nagito really, truly wants to believe - and seems to believe - that his soulmate is out there, and it isn’t too late to make a deep and meaningful connection with somebody; someone who will be just as eager to reciprocate. Someone he can be unafraid with, captivated with, and with whom, he can experience that Ultimate Hope. It’s even in the title - the moment he meets such a person, is the moment true Hope itself is born. Something far stronger than what already exists in the world. 

 Zansakura, the companion piece to ZKB, is worlds apart in many ways. 

 It is, according to Megumi, how Nagito feels on the “inside”, the other side of the proverbial coin to ZKB being how he feels on the “outside”. Likely, this means that part deep within him he doesn’t let others see. This is present in the overall tone alone. While ZKB embodied in it that uplifting way which Nagito talks about Ultimate Hope, Zansakura is much more somber. ZKB echoes the Nagito we see through Hajime’s eyes; while Zansakura is more congruent with those fleeting moments we experience the game from his perspective, wherein he is even more down on himself. As we play through the Final Dead Room with him, we see that the excessive way which he berates himself out loud is nothing compared to the second-guessing and self-debasement that goes through his mind. It truly is a dark and melancholy place, which shows through in the slow, sad melody of Zansakura. 

 This one takes the imagery to a whole other level, relying primarily on the cultural and symbolic relevancy of cherry blossoms. I’ve written about all this before, so for the sake of those who have been around this blog a while, I’ll try to summarise as best as I can. 

 In Japan, Cherry Blossoms are symbolic of the ephemeral nature of life -- in other words, the fleetingness and impermanence of it all. In no small degree, the connection between the symbolism of Cherry Blossoms and life and death comes from the influence of Buddhist culture, and is embodied specifically in the concept of mono no aware. This can be translated a number of ways that all pretty much come back to the same idea of existing for only a short period of time. It’s used to describe the awareness of impermanence, the transience of things, and a sadness or wistfulness as their passing; and a deeper sadness about this being the reality of things. I know this seems boring and irrelevant, but please keep especially this last bit in mind, as it’s very important to the meaning behind this song. 

 The most popular variety of Cherry Blossom in Japan are the Somei Yoshino, which are almost pure white and tinged with pale pink near the stem. Although this song was written after the fact, I have to wonder if this was always intended to be part of the character’s aesthetic, because these colours are reflected in Nagito’s character design - specifically, his hair. Anyway, the Somei Yoshino typically bloom and fall within a week. Winter Sakura or Fuyuzakura begin blooming in autumn and continue sporadically throughout winter alone. 

 Though Cherry Blossoms are an important, and even iconic image for the country, most people are surprised to learn they don’t last for very long. For Nagito to compare himself to these flowers is to admit that he, too, is here to bloom for a short period of time. It’s also worth noting that Cherry Blossoms are considered their most beautiful, not as they bloom, but rather as they wither and fall. And all of a sudden, I’m reminded of all the times Nagito talks about attaining hope through despair, and how his life has only found meaning as he inches closer to death.

 Yeah, I don’t like remembering this detail because it’s profoundly sad, but our marshmallow boy doesn’t exactly have long to live. He was given a year, at most, before starting at Hope’s Peak - and, at the end of the series, is presumably in his early-to-mid 20s. He’s beaten his own life expectancy, but not his illnesses. 

 The song starts in the most typical Nagito way I can think of:

“We can see again tomorrow", I laughed, short-lived cherry blossoms within my heart

 As he always does, he laughs and is cheerful with others, even though deep down, he’s tremendously sad. 

 The song then takes us through this most beautiful and haunting imagery, of cherry blossoms in bloom after surviving a storm*, preparing to wither and fall; until at last they do, and as the flowers are carried away by the wind and water, a lonely, broken branch is left behind, wanting to bloom again.

 (*The actual word used is ‘struggle’, however further down, the survival of a storm is mentioned, along with the flowers (aka hope) which will bloom after. The whole thing is a metaphor for his hope/luck cycle, is what I’m saying.)

 He talks about this imagery as someone observing it (The storm of flowers, the sudden wind / I halt and open my eyes); again, with this idea of a metanarrative lurking beneath a literal one. He does, however, break the narrative to address (presumably) that same elusive “you” from Zettai Kibou Birthday:

To live an ordinary life, and die together with you / Oh, if that could come true

 This seems so disconnected from the Nagito we know, who seems to have no interest in ‘ordinary’ things, and chases only hope. But as we’ve established, the place he most desires to seek hope is in another person. As he spends more time with Hajime during Island Mode, we know already that he admits to seeing hope in himself, and that he doesn’t necessarily take it as good news. But this line, right here, I feel embodies what this song is about, and what Nagito is all about. 

 Nagito is a very lonely person, desperate by his own admission for love and understanding. He knows he has little time left, and his prospects are...dim. Everyone he’s ever loved has either died or suffered at the hands of his luck, a force far beyond his control. And those who remain - namely, his classmates - either don’t like or don’t understand him. In ZKB - again, how Nagito feels on the “outside” - he expresses a hopefulness that there’s still someone he can love, who can love him, who he can experience that Absolute Hope with. But Zansakura has far more pessimistic expectations. 

 By breaking the metaphor to be straightforward and honest for a line, we get Nagito’s most core desire: to live a life with somebody; to love and be loved. Which, yeah, he’s already admitted to. For someone who’s been through so much, that probably seems like the most unattainable thing. Every time he gets comfortable, something invariably rips all that out from under him. And of that, he is painfully aware. Oh, if only that could come true - in other words, he knows it won’t. 

 Once again, do recall the concept of mono no aware. It’s not just an awareness of transience and impermanence, but also an intense, wistful sadness in the face of it. He knows he’s dying, and he knows he’s dying alone. But he’s not frustrated or angry, or even defiant. He’s not trying to fight it. As much as Nagito wants to hope for the best, deep down, he just can’t. He knows this is the reality, and he doesn’t have it in him to fight back. He’s just completely, deeply, helplessly sad. 

 In this song, Nagito’s life is represented as the petals that bloom for a short time, then fall; while he is the broken branch left behind; forgotten, wounded and unappealing; yearning for more time. Deep down, this is how he feels about himself. He is boring and unextraordinary, and yet (perhaps selfishly) he wishes that brief taste he has of being alive would last if only a little longer. He’s not quite ready to die yet, not until “the day this ordinary life is devoted”.

[geejaysmith]

Wolf 359: A running list of things I have a heightened appreciation on second listen, pt. 2

Part one here. 

SEASON 3:

Pan-Pan: Still a little miffed they didn't explicitly do the "we have to huddle to conserve body heat" trope. Yes, it's corny, but also shut up, let my touch-starved space disasters cuddle.

So Eiffel stopped Hera and Minkowski arguing in season 1 to address an emergency, and now with Eiffel absent, the team starts arguing again. The fact he doesn't exactly have much Pride In His Own Self-Sufficiency to get in the way of "hey! Guys! Remember, imminent death? More important priorities happening?" tends to defuse situations like this aaaaaand now he's absent.

"Cutter will send a squad of psychos to come up here and kill us faster!" ...she's not wrong.

"Pick a corner and relax! Hop to it!" I just like this line delivery.

"The entire station is a SPACE YUKON and this thing is overheating!" I know, it's like it's symbolic or something.

Episode 29: "we all feel responsible for losing Eiffel and are lashing out because we're scared and sad and grieving and fear getting backlash while we're vulnerable if we admit we need help, and we don't know what to do but keep going because the alternative is breaking down and possibly never getting back up again." Alternatively:  "It's Metaphors All the Way Down."

Mayday: Eiffel's frustrated screaming.

Brain Ghost Minkowski showing up like "Yeah, we know I'm a hallucination, or Weird Alien Shit, or maybe just a clever metaphor representing the abstract process of thought, but who gives a crap, this is more interesting than listening to you talk to yourself for an entire episode."

BGM: Hi, I'm your thought processes externalized using a face and personality that you subconsciously think you need to hear from in this situation, possibly because you think so little of yourself you need to hear it from somebody else first. Eiffel: Oh hey cool, this is just like this one web comic I kept up with sometimes back on Earth- BGM: Not another word.

Eiffel getting slapped by Brain Ghost Lovelace, who is a projection of his thoughts.

What is that whispering in his head that reminds him of the Hermes' name supposed to be anyway? Score one for my Weird Alien Brain Shit theory. Having Lovelace's alien juice in your system comes with such fun side effects.

"I dunno, I only know what you know." "Shut up, don't go meta on me." / "Hilbert wouldn't know that word! He's never even heard of Empire!" Yeah, toldja: it's Brain Ghosts.

Brain Ghost Hilbert may represent the realist in Eiffel and the brutal, calculating reality he doesn't want to confront, but Brain Ghosts Minkowski and Lovelace are his cooler head and ingenuity, working him through staying calm and devising a way to survive, and Brain Ghost Hera, who appears when Hilbert tells him it's hopeless, telling him that against all the odds he will be okay, is his stubborn determination to never, ever quit. They're all his determination to live when Doug might want to just stop trying. They're the better parts of himself, reflected in the voices of his friends.

And Hilbert. But I digress- HOLY FUCK, I just realized the brilliance in the one-two punch of the Brain Ghost Brigade contrasted with the previous episode's Stress Fracture Argue Crew, it's The Sound And The Fury all over again.

Paging the Wolf 359 incorrect quote blogs: "Save my friends! And Zoidberg Hilbert!"  

Sécurité thru Don’t Poke the Bear: Maxwell! I've missed you! (':

"And I build pretty awesome battle drones on the weekends." ...Does Maxwell have her own souped-up version of one Jamie Hyneman's Blendo?

Eiffel, realizing he's starting to sound like Minkowski: My god, what have I become.

Eiffel mumbling to himself in general. "This is hell and I'm in it."

Is it just me or is Kepler's pig story not as agonizingly drawn out to listen to the second time around?

A Matter of Perspective: Funzo: 12 different board games, three of them TCGs and maybe at least one TTRPG, all tossed in a blender, because Pryce and Cutter are psychopaths.

The Funzo manual is the size of the actual Bible and don't try to convince me otherwise.

How into the game the girls all get.

Headcanon: Minkowski and Lovelace are both the types to get stupidly competitive over any kind of game regardless of their initial level of investment.

Eiffel keeps a photo of (it's implied) him and his daughter taped to the underside of his console...

"He looks so... happy." shUT UP

"I had no idea Eiffel had a-" daughter. Was it "daughter" you were going to say Minkowski. Well, no one else knew you were married til you brought it up, so turnabout's fair play.

"You think you know me? You know the artist formerly known as Warren Kepler, you've met my job. Aside from that, there's no one left for you to know." In light of the series finale, I, uh... I don't if I like this, Scoob. Also, stop reminding me all these people are human persons underneath all the desensitization to horror and violence.

"Happy birthday, Eiffel." They remembered! Hope this one is less traumatizing than the last, Doug.

"Happy Kwanzaa!" "Lovelace."

"Long Story Short, that's the last time I saw Maxwell's feet" wh. What. What happened involving Maxwell's feet. What's. why-

And to make a long story short, that's where my "Maxwell has hands for feet" headcanon came from.

Need to Know: Minkowski's dreams, apparently, include both creating musicals and commanding a deep space mission. She's gotten the latter way the hell off the bucket list, somebody with actual songwriting skills want to get in and write the former with me?

Lovelace overindulging on painkillers for her broken arm after losing Officer Fisher... "It was a difficult time." ):

Aaaand serious implications of the above are immediately headed off by Lovelace quacking aggressively at Jacobi.

Fire and Brimstone: where is my fanfiction about Lovelace overseeing Minkowski during her solitary confinement?

The Backstory Episodes: Zach Valenti wrote all the backstory episodes! I just find that kind of sweet.

Once in a Lifetime: Small detail I only noticed on my second listen, after a fanfic put the thought in my head: Minkowski's parents are only referred to in the past tense. Oof.

"Thank you for coming in on such short notice. We had a hiccup in staffing for this upcoming quarter."  So... according to the wiki's timeline, the launch for the second Hephaestus mission was some time in late March 2013. The beginning of this episode (and Eiffel's) states it takes place in 2013, with 3 months of training, meaning they were probably brought on board in January and the whole thing moved *ridiculously* fast. Everything points to them wanting to get people up in space as quickly and with as little fuss as possible, giving the newcomers no time to think it over or do additional research. Once they start the training program, they're probably too busy to look further into Goddard's deep space missions, and are likely in an environment where Goddard Futuristics can cut them off from other information sources. The people they select are relatively isolated (Minkowski and her husband being an exception) - the easier to make them disappear. Even Lovelace has been stationed at "a lot of very isolated, very quiet outposts", the implication being her superiors wanted her somewhere out of the way. Kind of makes me wonder about the rest of the Hephaestus 1.0 crew...

Greensboro: Nice ominous foreshadowing you've got there vis a vis Captain Lovelace and "are you an alien?"

Decommissioned: "We're not about to force anyone to do something they don't want to do!" ...Marcus Cutter deserves to have his trousers ablaze constantly.

All Things Considered is still a bit confusing (because I somehow keep listening to it while doing something else) and I'll need another listen to figure out what probably actually happened, but it is also hilarious.

"Eiffel had engaged the machine, but that's why I build in extra safeguards. My mistake, clearly, was to assume that would be enough to stop the slapstick routine."

“All Things Considered”: Did you have fun with this over-the-top romp of hilarity and and hijinks, dear audience? Good! Because that was us burning off our comedy quota for the rest of the season. Get ready for six whole episodes of nonstop emotional gut-punches!

MEMORIA.

Just... Memoria.

Putting this quote here because of Reasons: "Three years... Three and a half years... I've had this thing in my head breaking me, and making me think it was all my fault, that there was something wrong with *me!*"

So Memoria is still one of the best episodes and the last five minutes fuck me up in a special little way.

Time to Kill: "Or the one outside is the real Jacobi... and the alien is already in here with us." The funny thing, Maxwell, is that you were half-right and didn't even realize it, and you *were* just speaking to Lovelace.

So... do alien duplicates only get reloaded from the singular "snapshot" of the person, or does getting flare-scanned once give them a continually updated source of info? What I'm getting at is: if another Jacobi shows up post-finale, would he need to be filled in on events between his horrible, terrible death and the present?

Persuasion: Maxwell switching to First Name Basis to get Jacobi to be honest with her.

I always forget until the scene after that Hilbert is totally setting up the Space Telephone to manipulate her, but of all the ways he could've gotten Minkowski around to "we are disposable and need to act *now* before these people decide they're done with us", it still kinda touching that this is the method he chose.

Desperate Times/Desperate Measures are just a blur of "oh god oh god oh god" and it's just as nailbiting the second time around. One thing I love about this podcast is how comfortable it is with (for its medium) long stretches of silence, which can feel a LOT longer when you have no other forms of feedback except dialogue to know the first gunshot was just a warning.

So you really *do* feel Minkowski breaking out into laughter when Eiffel tries to invoke Air Force code is a release of the tension that's been building for multiple episodes. Like he's finally gotten through to them just how far this has all gone and how much further it could still go. I keep saying this: when the situation starts to threaten violence, he's got an amazing gift for keeping the rest of the crew in touch with their common humanity when the rest get far too used to a world that runs on self-interest and subterfuge. Hell, he even gets Hilbert and *Kepler* opening up over the course of the story (presuming Kepler is being honest when he talks about being a shell of himself, but even though he was trying to manipulate Eiffel, that doesn't exclude there being a kernel of truth in those words).

Speaking of Kepler: he's definitely riding the adrenaline high of the situation and it turns him into a monster with a manic streak. It makes Jacobi's and Maxwell's relative calm all the eerier by contrast. Those two really do make you forget that all of this is... pretty horribly routine for them.

Until they meet their match, that is, when the women of the Hephaestus refuse to stand down, and each of them is unspeakably badass in their own way. What Kepler didn't account for is that they're ready and willing to die together rather than sacrifice one another for their own survival.

Although again, the irony of the situation is that just dropping the station into the star could have let them avoid, /gestures at season 4. BUT I'm not gonna rain on the Badass parade here.

Bolero, aka "The podcast kicking me in the feelings while I'm down."

The way Minkowski orders everyone else out of the room before Brain Ghost Lovelace conversates with her.  ...did she pop up in the middle of that conversation, I wonder? And all this when psi-wave radiation is spiking, apparently. Coincidence?

Oh come on Hera, war is no reason to end a friendship- Look, I came here from Metal Gear. I see folks dunking on Hilbert and I'm just over here like "he's still not as revolting as Huey Emmerich."  

Listen I've seen enough of Warren Kepler and Marcus Cutter in this fandom to know y'all aren't above liking a bad guy, you just prefer the ones who're having fun with it.

"You're gonna come to my funeral! And you're gonna like it! ...I mean you're gonna feel really sad! And cry! And stuff! GOT IT??" Ah, good ol' Eiffel.

THE COMPUTER ALSO HAS BRAIN GHOSTS

"If I'm not your doctor, then what are we?" "We're... complicated?" Listen, Eiffel, if you're not careful, I'm going to start shipping you and Hilbert ironically For The Lulz, and we all know where shipping things ironically always leads.

Errybody gets brain ghosts this episode. Again: I accept that this is a device that's more interesting than an alternative method of expressing these same ideas, but the ambiguity of a Watsonian explanation (is it all in their heads? Do they really see an apparition of some kind?) lets me do my Weird. Look, I once wrote in a joke in a fic about Death from Discworld complimenting a Quirky Miniboss Squad member from Metal Gear Solid 3 on his taste in interior decorating arena design, and that spawned entire subplots in projects for two different fandoms, and eventually roped in a third fandom to elaborate further on their now-intertwined cosmology. Do not underestimate how much I can give myself to work with.

The last ten minutes of Bolero also fuck me up in a special way, partly because We Are Dealing With the Hard and Unavoidable Fact of Death but also the aliens are about to throw a curve ball that'll... alter that last part a little.

Like, words cannot describe the "Dead Man's Curve in the wet" hard right turn of going from being in mourning for several beloved characters (including my favorite) to SURPRISE, SHE'S BACK! I love it.

I'd have to check the scripts to be sure exactly because some words got lost in Lovelace's respiratory spasms but I do like to imagine the her head wound closing up in front of a horrified Eiffel and Minkowski, with a side order of glow-y shit. I've drawn too many Homestuck god tier revivals I guess.

Update: I DID check the recording script's stage directions to see just how disgustingly physical the whole event is and okay, so no weird glowing shit (I reserve my right to depict it that way anyway) but I'm delighted to report that the gross anatomical-ness I was picturing? It's worse! It is so much worse!

The goddamn AGONY that is the Special Episode being TWO HOURS LONG when it comes right after the BIGGEST CLIFFHANGER IN THE SERIES.

You have NO IDEA WHAT KIND OF TEMPTATION IT WAS TO SKIP THIS AND COME BACK TO IT LATER

LOVELACE 1.0 I LOVE YOU BUT ALSO I WANNA TO SEE WHAT'S HAPPENING TO FUTURE-YOU RIGHT NOW

Change of Mind: love the framing device placing this episode as within Lovelace's mind during her successful cranial reconstruction saving throw.

"Buncha nerds, gonna crash my-"

Just how familiar she is in this place, with these people... Hera was installed in her sister's grave (as another post put it), but Lovelace lives in the gutted cadaver of her home.

Zach Valenti's Lambert voice *does* sound like a bad Minkowski impression.

"I have a physicist to put the fear of *me* into." That's my girl. She kind of was more of an ass pre-Total Party Kill, though? Like come on, Isabel, how necessary *is* all this arguing with Lambert?

Fourier's voice is very nice, also. Very soft, very easy on the ears.

I'm now appreciating how it sounds like Fisher is the older and calmer mediator among the crew.

Also the image of Isabel just floating out in space and listening to some chill tunes is sooooo good.

Hey Doc, did it turn out Fisher was too perceptive to live. Was getting caught outside in that meteor shower really an accident. Hey. Hey Hilbert. Answer me. 

Also goddamnit, has EVERY character in this series has read Harry Potter?

Did the Fishers always differentiate each other by audio channel? I had to rewind the scene when I realized Lovelace's questions in my right ear weren't getting an answer.

"Say you're a big pink elephant!"

*gunshot* *gross biological dissolving noises* WHY

"Just because somebody made you something doesn't mean that's all you're going to be - you can be more!" I wrote this line down prior to the end of the episode's confirmation that it's a Big Thematic Point.

Aaaand we're back to the framing device, and with that, season 3 wraps. Or maybe season 4 kicks off? Either way, hell of a way to kick it off.

Cecilia Lynn-Jacobs had a hand in writing this episode? Aw... that's sweet...

So, yeah, headcanon: Alien resurrection does the weird glowy thing to close any obviously fatal maladies, then the gross biological viscera part kicks in, hence Lovelace sounding like she's trying to hack up her lungs as soon as she starts using them again.

Listen, sometimes the gross biological viscera parts are my favorite parts, okay? Okay.

[shayderwolfspirit]

As some of you know I am one of the leaders on Supernatural Amino and the past weekend when we got the news we just couldn't get to make the usual weekend challenge. Here's what I wrote and partly how I reacted , I feel like the last things I wrote were like open letters towards y'all and I just hope that some words and to see the support and love in this family helps a little 

No weekend challenge this time. Here's why:

Hello y'all, this is Sam,

As some of you have noticed, this weekend we got no weekend challenge.

The truth is that the news hit us all so much we couldn't think of anything better than just letting people deal with it how they can, and we had to deal with that as well. Personally I still have not absorbed nor elaborated the informations about the end of the series next year, it's still far and we have a lot to enjoy and will have those moment forever, but still it hit me right in the guts. 

Supernatural means so much more than just a show, it's not just a way to spend time and entertain ourselves, it's not something that will pass, I know most of us know what I'm talking about and what the so family means, we will always care about the story, the cast and crew, the people, the other fellow fans. We do Because we are not just a fandom, we are a family. 

I see that some people tell others don't cry because it's over, smile and be happy because it happened. But I don't quite totally agree with that, I say both, I smile it happened (and it's still happening) and I am sad it's over (not yet!). All of it and even more because if there's something we learn from supernatural is that it's okay to be sad, it's okay to be angry, or numb, it's okay to have happiness and sadness and confusion because it's part of life and it's part of us, every emotion, everything we feel completes us, and above all. Over ? It will never really be over. This? This is real and will stay after the show stops airing new episodes, new stories, we have developed our owns too.

Some need to grief this huge mountain that just seems to have been fallen from the clear sky, unexpected somehow because as the show keeps kicking stronger every year and the fandom is of the most loyal I know, we didn't see that coming any time soon. 

 It happened,

and we all deal with it how we can,

  because it’s okay to feel how you feel, it’s okay to feel, period.

It helps to cry, scream, or simply talk,

It helps to paint, sketch, draw something

Write down thoughts or write fanfictions, imagines, shorts

It helps to make edits and photo manips, to play with colors and lights

It helps to roleplay and keep the flame alive

It helps to have someone reminding us to drink and sleep and eat, like the Winchesters too need to be reminded sometimes.

What I wanna say is, take your time, because it takes time, and it hurts like hell, it does, because it's real, because it reveals how true it all is and how deep it gets us, which is both getting us emotional and incredibly proud of being part of something this huge, worldwide connecting people and saving lives since 2005.

It is not the end, as the quote goes "nothing really ends, does it?" And it couldn't be more true.

What after the show ends? What do we do?

Basically, calling all fans!

Besides there's still plenty of time before supernatural closes, we do what we do best, we stand together, we keep doing what we've been doing, we keep create, support and share with the world everything we have learned and we will look forward to what else new we can discover and learn, one never stop learning, one never stop getting surprised by life, every single day is different and new even when it seems like the same, even when it seems too hard, we go through, even when we go down we fix the day and we keep fighting, because that's what we do. Our values, our hopes and wishes, won't ever get wiped out, by the way... As for glitter, good luck getting rid of us! 

So, I say we can do a few things:

1. We grief, take time off the media

2. We create something,

Draw, write, share what supernatural means to you, be part of the current fan-projects, because we all make this possible together with the heroes we look up to.

- Tweet your support and love, write a letter, tell us something about yourself, the THEM something about yourself and as it is painful for us it hurts more them than us, it is painful for everyone so lets give them the best thank you we can but not as ending, not as goodbye, but to celebrate every day the friendships, the family, the examples we carry on in life, To share that strength that is in our heart making us all fight harder for each other. We are not alone, they are not either, we will never be.

Either way, don't forget to drink, breathe, eat and sleep, I forgot most of this myself, and I keep reminding it trying to get it together.

So, just FYI, I submitted a wiki (on supernatural amino) that I did a while ago to keep all the fan projects together, you can  pin it and submit with this along to share and keep track of ideas and opportunities to partecipate and help bring these actions to reality

Fandom's Creations http://aminoapps.com/p/hyxnif

And here's a public chatroom for the projects, to discuss about things, ask questions if in doubt and none less be there to support one another 

> Say something nice and I'll write it down http://aminoapps.com/p/svh90q

Here are some projects I'm aware of: 

(if you know of projects going on please let me know, I’d love if we all manage to share anc connect!)

1. Fanbook/Album project

Fanbook project http://aminoapps.com/p/jul1yf organized by myself for the jibcon this may, I’ll be traveling to Rome in may 13 2019 carrying with me all the messages I can collect

reminder http://aminoapps.com/p/ojg11k for J2MA (Jared, Jensen, Misha and Alex) and all the rest of the cast and crew of supernatural (everyone involved) separately or in group

2. Scrapbooks, 4x j2ma http://aminoapps.com/p/2022dl A scrapbook for each of them separately, one for Jared, one for Misha, one for Jensen and one for Alex, this is not organized by me but by Ashlynn, an user on Supernatural Amino, the books will be sent.

3. Jason Manns/Louden Swain project http://aminoapps.com/p/4gp65n organized by a dear friend of mine @toastiel it’s on Tumblr too

4. Video project http://aminoapps.com/p/bqh707 organized by yet another member of the spn amino

I suggest that if you want to give a letter specifically to one of J2M (Jared Jensen and Misha) you can submit it to the scrapbooks, and yes you can send it for the fanbook/album too, which is something towards them and the rest of the cast, it can be a message not for one of them but all 3 together in one letter, you can also partecipate in both. I will.

Please consider to put some energy, to do something nice evening simple into the project for the Louden Swain as well as the others, as they are a strong part of this family and conventions.

Remember, this is not a challenge, this is not a goodbye, it's more like an event "event" like, today we write something about ourselves and what supernatural means for us and those around us, It's a "hey the news shocked me too" look around, look at everyone else, we are in this together, it's not the end, so lets remind ourselves how strong and real this is and how alive we are, lets share some of the best things that touched us through these years and kept us together, because I have the feeling supernatural, this, this is something that probably will endure forever.

This place... it's hard right now, everywhere I see people hurt, but it's my home, it's our home, we just need a little time

It will be fine, just carry on and keep fighting because you're not alone, and you are enough, so am I.

Let's be creative and put some color in the day

Of course you'll have time to make stuff, lets see what we can do

If have doubts please ask questions about it

If you need support and to talk please take a look at the AKF initiative and join one of the AKF support chats (AKF Initiative on Supernatural Amino) 

[jounetsulovers]

So! the silence in between was a monster of a fic. Officially, it’s the longest fanfic I’ve ever written, clocking in around 12.6k words. I’ve learned a lot from this experience, but I wanted to share with you some of the notes I’ve collected about writing it. I love talking about writing! Spoiler alert: this is very long.

Amagi’s arc plays very differently in both the games and anime. The initial inspiration for having this fic be from Yukie’s POV is the fact that, in the games, she is actually present for Mahoro and Amagi’s big confrontation. They’re billed as a trio, but we get so little in the way of backstory or development for her friendship with them that I immediately started crying one night and spat out the first chapter.

I decided to work with the game verse following that fact, so especially with the last chapter, deviation from the anime is absolutely intentional. In the games, Megane finds the manual for Atlantis Wall, calls ahead to get it on reserve, and Amagi, already upset, charges ahead of the rest of the team to get there first and accidentally has a run-in with Mahoro and Yukie.

Yukie is actually the granddaughter of Mr. Magic Moves himself! That’s 100% true to the games.

Mahoro is probably the biggest deviation to the game timeline for this fic. I did write his dialogue with his anime counterpart in mind, mostly because I think between the two of them, the anime did a better job of capturing his hopelessness. Mahoro in the games acts a lot more like pre-heel face turn Tsurugi than anything else.

Amagi I tried to write somewhere between both his game and anime counterparts. I think his dialogue feels the most consistent between the two adaptions.

One thing you’ll probably notice is that Hikaru’s involvement is.... nonexistent. Again, this is something that’s different in the games. He does have relevance to the chapter, but he and Yukie don’t interact in any real capacity like in the anime.

Title comes from No Light, No Light by Florence and the Machine. Everyone will eventually have a fic named after this song in some form, so might as well try to be a hipster and choose a section that isn’t the obvious. Silence being a theme in the story, it felt relevant.

Originally I’d conceived this fic as having more chapters covering more specific chunks of Yukie’s life. But then I realized I could hit the high points in 4 because that’s Amagi’s jersey number!! So I did. That.

I now understand why so many video game anime adaptions say “FUCK GAME MECHANICS” because it was an absolute nightmare to try and figure out how I wanted to explain the manual shop. I think the fact that it feels deliberately old-fashioned in the games helps out somewhat. Considering how behind the times Yukie’s Grandfather is (a landline?! in 2018?! actually that’s fairly common I deal with enough business accounts at work to know) hopefully it doesn’t seem too weird that a move archive would exist in the digital age. You wouldn’t download a hissatsu

Every place ever but the subs I originally watched for Go spell it Genei, not Gen’ei, but dang it I’m going with what I know!!

Balance posts are a real thing. I literally didn’t know what they were called until now.

Mahoro is a defender in Resistance Japan. Amagi and Yukie are of course defenders by default in-game. It just felt right having that be his original position as a kid. I think he’d be great at it!

SO. A lot of things had to be fleshed out for the trio to break apart. It’s a sort of rift that could potentially be solved with a phone call or the fact that it’s 2018 by the end and probably have cell phones. I did have to do some extra lifting in order to make the drifting apart a little more convincing. A combination of moving, life events, and misunderstandings shown in the canon was what I landed with.

A lot... of emotions were felt writing out the scene in chapter two where Yukie’s grandfather falls. I have literally been in her shoes. It’s something you never quite get out of your head. The circumstances were different, but the core emotions I tried to channel into it are the same.

Fun fact: all of the side characters in Chapter 3 are actually real characters in the games!

This is Kadotsuka.

This is Kureno.

And this is Coach Yatsuhaka! Poor coach. I couldn’t find a way to slip his candle motif in.

Was a former Occult member purposefully chosen to call back to the fact that 10 years later they’re still probably getting flak for the cheating thing? From a former Raimon team member, no less? Hmmmmmmmmmm.

Yes, the man in white was Senguuji. I saw the chance and took it.

A lot of Fifth Sector stuff ultimately got cut, which is sad but it just ended up not being relevant to the points in the fic I wanted to make. Ditto a lot of team interactions, as well as Gen’ei Lore. Ask me about my Gen’ei Lore

I still made a chart for all the team members of Gen’ei so I didn’t have to keep booting up my game or looking at the wiki.

#SeidouzanWasZeus. Stay shady, school.

Maboroshi Shot coming from Phantom Shoot (which is an old, ooooold shoot from way back in s1) is an important hc to me, because I find the idea of hissatsu ownership and evolution a fascinating thing to look at in the context of Inazuma. People remix and evolve moves all the time, and I have a few theories about certain shots becoming others in the period between the original series and Go.

Amagi is not a Watch User, nor is he a Pillar Man.

One thing that hit me in the middle of writing the last chapter is that Yukie.... as far as we can tell, at least.... never sees a good example of an Avatar, or a context where they’re not just an extension of Fifth Sector’s power. She probably doesn’t like them much at all.

Fun game fact: each stadium has their own mini route leading up to them. So that conversation actually does take place in a snowy path in game.

...Yes, Kurumada does make a comment about Yukie being an ex-girlfriend. It’s so tonally awkward that I had to include it because it’s the most middle school “read the ROOM” moment. It cracks me up.

Yearly reminder that there’s two Meganes.

SO. Two particular quirks of my writing style:

One is that I HATE describing hair color with a passion. I will do just about anything to avoid it unless it’s absolutely necessary.

Two is that I hate writing dialogue verbatim, unless I’m quoting something extremely iconic. Pretty much 80% of the dialogue in the last chapter is inspired by either the game scene or the anime scene.

Yukie running after Mahoro also happens in-game! I just fleshed out the conversation following it, hehe.

One thing I just could not fully acknowledge without derailing the ending was the fact that Gen’ei’s match against Raimon canonically happens right after the first Go movie. Amagi has God Eden fresh in his head the entire time. Let that sink in. I’m not happy with the brief dancing around of it, either, but it felt wrong to not bring it up in some form.

AND...... THAT’S THAT. Thank you to everyone who joined me on this wild adventure!

[areaaaa51]

Tate London art gallery trip.

Ed Ruscha, DIRTY BABY, 2005

Ed Ruscha is an American artist associated with the pop art movement, Working with painting, printmaking, drawing, photography and film.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Ruscha

This work was one of the first which caught my eye, I've always been interested in Ed Ruscha’s work ever since I first discovered him from a famous piece of his ‘OOF’. Ruscha’s work has a lot of block colours and are very bold colours, his work often consists of one or a few words which are often quite statement or political. 

Ed Ruscha, HOPE, 1998

I was especially drawn to his piece on ‘HOPE’ I like how it shows the letters fading away towards the end as if it starts off strong but slowly gets weaker. This can mean a lot of things, I thought that it would be a possible indicator about growing up - How when we are young the world seems so bright and easy and when we begin to understand and grow up we see all the wrong in the world are now exposed to all these new emotions, Showing that what we once those would've been easy ahs proven to be very difficult. That the dream jobs we had as a kid (Singer, Astronaut, Doctor, Footballer, Firefighter) seems so ridiculous now, as if we could become any of these things, we loose hope.  

I also think the background is very significant as you can see its sort of fussy even at the start, I think this might be implying that even at the start when we were younger and we were asked “what do you want to be when you grow up?” we didn't actually have an answer we just chose something which we thought was cool, we didn't even really want to be an astronaut. I think even subconsciously we knew we wouldn't become the thing we said we wanted to be, it was far to early to know. The background could also imply that this could be about memory loss, as we get older we tend to forget a lot more than when we were younger, its sad but its also part of life - maybe even to do with dementia, loosing memory and slowly losing yourself, lost hope. 

I love pieces like this where from something which may seem so simple, there is so much underlying meaning just by using one or two words and positioning them in a a certain way. I love the way the artist has made this to really get the audience asking questions, trying to figure out the reasoning behind it. I like the idea of reading in between the lines, this is something I want to put into my work. This work is relevant to me as I am doing in theory something very similar - going from one extreme to the other, going from fresh ripe fruits to decomposing moldy fruits. Showing the processes of life, the good and the bad, the ups and the downs, as that is life. 

Ed Ruscha, Country Cityscapes series, 2001

A lot of my paintings are anonymous backdrops for the drama of words. In a way, they’re words in front of the old Paramount Studios mountain. You don’t have to have a mountain back there – you could have a landscape, a farm. I have background, foreground. It’s so simple. And the backgrounds are of no particular character. They’re just meant to support the drama, like the Hollywood sign being held up by sticks. (Quoted in Marshall 2003, p.239.)

This piece here, I was originally drawn to because of the landscape behind and the title ‘You’re A Dead Man’, the common cliché cowboy catchphrase. You can kind of make out where the letters would go, I was a confused why the artist took this approach to cover up the words in all of these images. After researching further into it Ed Ruscha work, I found that by covering up, or ripping out the text ‘in one sense the absent text evacuates the image of the violent threat’. ‘The artist is removing the drama from the scene, or highlighting the evacuated meaning of this frequently repeated and parodied cowboy catchphrase’.

I admire how carefully thought of this piece is, its unexpected, something Ed Ruscha is famous for (a prominent background and bold text) its completely new, surprising. Knowing that the words have been or are still there but are just covered up to avoid conflict or drama is something fascinating to me.

I feel this is something to think about epically with my work, by removing the thing which makes the audience feels uncomfortable or discomfort, but still knowing it’s there, just hidden away to make it seem more appealing for example with my work: removing the decay or making it not visible in photos, to removes any drama from the scene. 

https://www.tate.org.uk/art/artworks/ruscha-youre-a-dead-man-country-cityscapes-series-al00295

Ed Ruscha, HONK, 1962

Ed Ruscha, Dead End, 2014

Both power words, big and unable to escape them, very loud, even though they don't make any noise.

Naoya Hatakeyama, Natural landscapes in Tokyo, 2012

Naoya Hatakeyama, Natural landscapes in Tokyo, 2012

Mark Bradford, May Heaven Preserve You From Dangers and Assassins, 2010

James Rosenquist, Skull Snap, 1989

Jean Hélion, Ile DE France, 1935

Guerrilla girls, Guerrilla Girls Review The Whitney, 1985-1990

Wilhelm Sasnal, Gaddafi 1, 2011

Wilhelm Sasnal, Gaddafi 3, 2011

Cildo Meireles, A tower of radios laying at once, addresses ideas of information overload and failed communication, 2001

Mimmo Rotella, With a Smile, 1962

John Stezaker, Mask Series, 2005-2006

Silke Otto-Knapp, A series of images following one from the other, 2018

I thought this piece was captivating, What I have gathered from this is it is some kind of interpretive dance, this is interesting because of the colours, never changing and being completely immersed into blue and I think this background and the lighting has some significance towards the dance as it very sort of forced, as if the person is tired they are dragging there shoes of the ground as the move, effortlessly but lacking the passion.

I was watching this for about five minutes, it’s very melancholy, and still despite all the movement, it is quiet and lonely. I wasn't sure if this was a loop or a long piece of interpretive dance, but I found it very interesting and couldn't look away.

From observation I think this piece is to do with depression and anxiety. the movement looks almost forced although, it flows well it appears that she is tired, walking round the same areas, lying down as if she is stuck in some kind of vicious circle. Maybe this is a loop and it shows that how people experiencing depression or anxiety feel stuck inside a loop and that everyday is the same. Unable to break the cycle, it continues.

The striking background is something which caught my eye at first, such a simple colour with so much history. We often associate the colour blue with feeling sadness, cold or icy, unfriendly and distant but, we also associate blue with being peaceful, stable, Not threating and being secure. These are quite contrasting feelings and I believe that the first meanings I wrote (sadness, distant) are the ones we tend to not see or we choose to ignore. The other meanings (stable, secure) are the ones we love to hear, love to see. 

I think this is a very special piece, it has so much to it. By the artist choosing this colour blue its already allowed the audience to see so much, It broadens our minds and allows us to look deeper, allow the fact it might just be more than a pretty colour. 

Something I want to incorporate into my work is colour and use it well, allowing the colour to speak, as it with holds so much emotion within it’s self.