#THE NATURALS NEEDS ONE SO BADLY
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I just realised that if the inheritance games were ever turned in to a show (which i would absolutely DEVOUR btw), people who haven’t read the books would come at my girl Avery for just existing 😭
NO BECAUSE SHE’S ALREADY SO UNDERRATED AS IT IS, AND WITHOUT HER INTERNAL MONOLOGUE SHE WOULD BE COMPLETELY MISCHARACTERISED AND PEOPLE WOULDN’T LIKE HER BECAUSE THEY WOULDN’T SEE HER FOR WHAT SHE IS.
I DON’T KNOW IF I COULD TAKE THAT.
like she would constantly be overshadowed by the four brothers because they are meant to have quirks and distinct personalities to show that they grew up to be cultivated a certain way.
Avery had none of that. She grew up normally, and has a very normal personality. She doesn’t speak in riddles, or wear suits everyday, or singe her eyebrows off, or even have hardcore dedication to the cowboy aesthetic. She is just a girl who gets sucked into a world where everything is so foreign to her and she’s just trying to make sense of it all. Even though she feels incredibly awkward she still does an amazing job as establishing herself as the heiress she is.
I love her because I see myself in her. She could blow up the houses of parliament and I’d forgive her for it. But in the books there are certain moments where she acts insensitive and is ignorant of other’s feelings. For example when she forgot Max’s, her besties, birthday. And though in the books you see her grow and become more caring for those around her, a show wouldn’t do justice to it. People wouldn’t like her for it, and keep on not liking her for it.
The show would become just about the brothers, and whether you were Team Jameson or Team Grayson, and everyone would overlook Avery even though she’s the MAIN CHARACTER AND ITS HER SHOW.
anyways, I LOVE LOVE LOVE AVERY AND EVERYONE ELSE SHOULD TOO.
#but like since were on the topic of book adaptations#THE NATURALS NEEDS ONE SO BADLY#I WOULD EAT IT UP#the inheritance games#the brothers hawthorne#the final gambit#the hawthorne legacy#avery kylie grambs#jameson hawthorne#the grandest game#grayson hawthorne#averyjameson#grayson x lyra kane#xander hawthorne#nash hawthorne
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I low-key want Cain to be Lane's roommate in the next episode. I was hooked when he visited her room to spend the night with her and now, I want Cain to turn her room into his domain where he comes and goes as he pleases. Lane is working on the Book and Cain is sitting behind her, wings folding around her frame as he strokes her bare arms and hair. I want Cain to be the first to wake up every morning, kiss a sleeping Lane on the cheek, and leap out the open window to soar the skies searching for abominations to kill.
I want Lane and Cain to get dressed together while discussing the Book, what they found during patrols, and what they'll have for dinner tonight with the Squad. I want Lane to stroke Cain's feathers while he's reciting scriptures from the bible and mocking some of the passages. I want Lane to fall asleep at her desk and Cain to scoop her up in his arms and carry her to bed. I just...want them to be roommates and have all the little domestic moments.
#romance club#heaven's secret requiem#cain x lane#otp: the beauty and horror#rc lane#rc cain#rc hsr#please...I need this so badly#I don't give a shit about the lack of sex between them because that doesn't matter#I want the little soft moments#and yes despite his complex and disturbing nature cain has shown his softer and romantic side in small doses#just imagine the squad finding out they “moved in” together when they spot cain flying out of lane's window one morning#and then flying back inside her room in the evening#cain would roost in her room lol
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do i finish dunmesh tn ..
#JOOO IM SO SCAREDD im going 2 sit at my desk tmr night like when i finished trigun just staring ahead . nothing 2 do .#but its sooo good i want to see it through😭AUGGGHHF#girls .. marcilles dungeon lord outfit …orz… omg ..#two standout scenes one from vol 11 and one from 12#loved kabrus panic @ his inability to stop laios and co from moving forward . loved how the panels were arranged#and i loved laios dismissive tone vs kabrus stuttering and the sleeve pull imagery again and again and it slipping through his fingers#and the attempts 2 explain utaya but not knowing how and later on feeling rooted in place w fear . SOOO GOODDD !!?#second being marcilles descent into mad mage type of headspace .like wanting and needing so badly to see her desires out#but recognizing the overhwelming nature the powers n wishes have granted her and the insufficient timeframe which 2 accomplish things#that one panel in particular of her yelling for laios to shut up!!shut up shut up shut up#STOPPIF ORS SOOO GOOD I LOVE THE ART THERE#eehee ok maybe ill get through vol 13 and hold off 14 a little longer just 2 have a little smt left over😭#plus i need to see chimera!laios so bad. at least i think thats a thing that happens idk for sure but im a believer .#dunmeshi#dunmeshi spoilers#dungeon meshi spoilers
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Let him dad her!! (Patreon)
#Doodles#Adventure Time#Fionna and Cake#Fionna Campbell#Simon Petrikov#I cannot BeLieve that they didn't hug at any point - illegal. One million years dungeon#She slapped him (deservedly) but they didn't hug by the end??? I had to fix it#Jerry is my favourite episode so that at least was an easy choice lol#If anywhere would be a good place to cross that line it would be to comfort her! I can't imagine he'd initiate tho haha#She's just seeking comfort so badly <3 I know she's at least legally considered an adult but she's still a kid!#And Simon just keeps adopting kids lol#He's a good dad :) Not a perfect one but y'know? He helps where he can#Sometimes all we need is a parent figure giving you a hug and saying ''You know what? You're right - this sucks. But I see you''#Fionna's quite interesting 'cause like - she's meant to be a Finn but there are a lot of differences between her and quite a few Finns!#A lot of that is Because she lived in Simon's head for so long but I wonder - most Finns have decent support systems and she seems a little#Well not lacking Exactly but her fallbacks aren't as numerous - and she's not able to fulfill her life's purpose so she's just kinda wayward#Seeing that kind of Finn finally able to spread their wings but still have a lot of Finn trappings like naivety and impulsivity ♪#She's interesting! I quite like her :D Plus it's cool to see her natural EQ when she calls out Simon later in this episode unknowingly haha#I stopped at episode eight for a while but year her line about ''Then you got on the bus right? :D'' and him refuting it#Hmmm ♪ It was certainly interesting - I'm glad they addressed it :)#Plus she's fun to draw haha ♫ Her bunny ears! And the jacket she took from Martin </3 She has a fun design#And as always Simon is fun to draw :) Especially piecemeal here haha - just his mouth or just his eyes ♪ Cute :)
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Was going through it last night so I took some pictures of my Prime!Sonic and Nine figures
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#sonic the hedgehog#sonic prime#sonine#miles nine prower#nine the fox#nine sonic prime#I mostly just did dumb stuff#I had them hug for my soul#and then I had them implied kiss for my soul#I think it would be enough just for Sonic and Nine to meet again and have the biggest softest and longing hug you ever saw#I need Sonic to miss him so badly while Nine assumes he naturally forgot about him#I need them to meet again one day#i just be ramblin
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God I'm so fucking annoyed how come she gets to treat me however she likes and then gets to say she didn't mean it?????
#have u considered not constantly comparing me to ur abusive husband who hit u??????#since i was like 8 its really fucking weird#like who in their right mind tells their child theyre naturally destructive just like their father and then says ohhhhh but i didnt mean it#are u fucking insane#doesnt help that i look like him too everyone tells me that#and now she acts like me raising my voice once means she needs to walk on eggshells around me wtf#what about how u treated me from ages 13-16#freak#i cant believe this shes treating me like im some scary stranger as if shes not the one with full financial control and that im this horribl#person go kill yourself omgjdjsjsjwjwwhwhhw#fuck u#last year was the worst year of my life and that was wholy bc of u you showed me what place i really have in this family and that it was not#hing. how is sveryrone so ready to throw me away??#yet everyone else gets to say shes sooo proetctive and loving fuck off you wouldnt even tell them youre treating me badly diedie diediediedi#i want to cut so bad bro#but i promised myself i wont so#i mean i dont even have any way of gettibg blades so whatver#just remembered her reaction to me cutting#nothing. yeah absolutely no reaction. i thought the worat thing that could happen was her gettjbg mad at me again but no#i realised there was somwthing worse. she just straight up doesnt care#useless mother#im fine w u treating me like shit ive accepeted it that i have no place in anyone's life unlesss i hive into this but at least#at least stop trying to confront me like this#just let me rot in peace#i really dont want to do this anymore#any time now she'll ask me if i was pretending to cry so i wpuldnt have to go out w her now#as if that isnt insulting#and then she'll say i wasnt trying to be rude!!! as if she hasnt always treated me like none of my feelings r real. i only ever overeact. ok
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preemptively sorry for how fucking long this is it is YOUR FAULTT THOUGH!!!! large bowl of seeds for u. it is almost 2am sorry.
SO. there are. two ways to assign the prime defenders powers etc. the first way is just, like, categorize their existing powersets within the prt framework, & the second is to give them entirely new abilities based on the way worm works. delightfully, all the powers they Do have work really well for the most part, so even that doesn't require a ton of shuffling.
categorizing their pre-existing powers:
wiwi-- breaker w/ a shaker subclass. neither of them rated very high, but that's already a rare and versatile enough combination!!
dakota-- brute babeeeey!!! brute/mover its so straightforward. hell yeah babey. i don't know what he'll end up looking like post-heart removal & stuff but my guess is that'll end up looking more like a mover/striker.
vyncent-- now THIS one gave me trouble. i... hm. to say this without talking about stuff that i don't think has come up much already, (hey!! you're at that clockblocker pov! directly related to what flechette says!) i'd call him a grab-bag cape, irt the greats at least. post-greats-- again, i don't know what his powerset will look like after this arc! but if he's going all in w/ the fire magic, that would for sure be some striker shit! :]]]
giving them new powers... man i'm reining myself in so hard from five more paragraphs on Why exactly i'm saying all this.
wiwi still breaker for sure, maybe breaker-master, maybe master-stranger. yknow. powers are fluid, the prt categories are pretty rigid. i... don't know. enough about his situation yet to be clearer than that vague idea yet-- i really like the idea of him just. ditching his body & using a noncorporeal form but he still has to keep an eye on his body i think that's great. the noncorporeal form would b able to change its visibility but still b limited by proximity to the body. & fluctuating energy shit powered by fluctuating amounts of recent-death in the area, maybe probably also limited in that it's only accessible in his breaker form.... also i think u will appreciate this style note from the [UNNAMED PARAHUMANS TTRPG] i'm referencing a lot here.
dakota--in this situation he probably would not. have that mechanical heart and shit. he' would still be a mover/thinker-- thinker rating is for faster mental processing + senses imminent pain for the people in his immediate vicinity. not danger, just pain; it immediately registers ambiently & can be generally traced back to whoever it is. no he can't turn it off ever, it manifests as feeling a similar level of pain, yes it works on himself. + mover-- he can fucking fly. no super strength, just very fast flight & the general "won't splat himself flying into something" capabilities, which meshes well w/ the faster processing & reflexes. i'm split on how exactly this would work mechanically but i will NOT go into that now. i am also not going into the 15k discussion in my brain on why dakota 'notoriously bad at thinking about things' cole would be a thinker but u gotta trust the process ok??
vyncent-- trump!!!! somehow this is the only straightforward one to me? he can copy powers at the full strength or ability level of the original for an unspecified amount of time that's usually 1-30 minutes by touching the cape. crucially, he doesn't have any edge on how to use these powers + can easily misuse or become extremely overwhelmed by them. he's easily the most powerful out of the three of them <33
ashe-- ashe is NOT HERE currently and also it's 1:30 am so i gotta go fucking sleep soon BUT they would be a master. easy. :o) they can make some lil guys n do stuff with them!!!!
in general these are pretty fucking cracked abilities, all of them would b oosely above a seven or so in a number rating once they're really settled in their powers-- this is mostly because i'm assuming that they would still be heirs-apparent to the prime force equivalent, which would b the triumvirate :]] anyway. good lord. this is like the cliff notes edition of what i've been thinking and scribbling in the notes app for the past several hours. sorry if it's fucking incomprehensible. gn!!! <333
AAAAAH FUCK YESSSSSS OKAY OKAY OKAY my response is probably going to be equally as long. so it's fine. oooouh buddy.
I KNOW WHAT BREAKER MEANS NOW !!! I dontttt think ive learned shaker yet. breaker is like.... breaking the laws of physics/shifting planes or whatever. PERFECT for william hell yes. for putting them actually in worm world ... ughhhh breaker/master william is REALLY cool. I havwnt learned stranger yet but i think he would develop a complex over being classified as stranger <3 (like how weld doesn't like that he's classified as a brute even though that's not exactly what it means, he just doesn't like the word) . GODDDD just thinking abt putting pd boys in worm is fucking me up haven't they been through enough. I want to see them all in a fit of despair. william ditching his body is SO good I miss when he would do that, also the powers being limited by how far away he is AND THE AMOUNT OF RECENT DEATH IN THE AREA. holy shit. that's so fucking good . im sure he would not overthink at all the fact that he is stronger when more people around him have died . I'm sure he'd do awesome in the leviathan fight for sure for sure .
DAKOTA BRUTE <3 DAKOTA BRUTE/MOVER I LOVE THIS A LOTTTTTT hellbyes. awesome. it's so perfect for him <3 worm world I'm SURPRISED u didn't stick with brute for him. eyes emoji. I trust your judgement but now i am Thinking... Hmm..... YOU BRING INTO QUESTION something I have been thinking about. and I'm going to probably get derailed a little here but stay with me. how the way powers manifest directly relate to the trigger event. because for a WHILE before we learned taylors I was like "OH i bet the powers are going to be directly related to what traumatic thing happened to them" and then we learn about taylor and grue and a couple more and I kind of lost that theory because while you can. technically draw relations between their powers and their events it seemed like too much of a stretch to do . HOWEVER now my thinking has changed AGAIN and I think the powers ARE related to specific trigger events but it's not as straightforward as "oh something scary happened to you with bugs so now you have bug powers" I think it's gonna be more complicated than that. WHICH. THE WAY THIS RELATES. BACK ON TOPIC NOW. to DAKOTA . assuming his trigger event is still he and katori falling off the building I think it's AWESOME that his powers would manifest as FLIGHT for one. and the fucking. pain sense thing. fuck me up. dakota extreme hero complex cole would be so fucked up by a power where he ambiently senses pain from the people around him at all times and cannot turn it off. I'm sure he would feel so normal about being around william chronic pain wisp 24/7. also I can SO CLEARLY imagine how this power specifically would lead to him getting super overwhelmed in chaotic situations like he does in canon. and just fucking. bolt out of there because it's too much. again. he'd have such a wonderful time in the leviathan fight
I AM AT CLOCKBLOCKER POV !!!! actually technically I'm on kid win pov now but I haven't finished his chapter yet. vyncent grab bag cape..... yeah... I think it would be EXTREMELY funny imagining the PRT in pd world trying 2 classify vyncent like. what the fuck does this kid do . what do we do with him. hes got other guys in his head that give him powers. is he a master??? no he can't fucking control them. is he a striker??? only SOMETIMES. is he a blaster?? AGAIN ONLY SOMETIMES. cannot classify him bitch!!!!!!!! giving him worm powers though.. UGH. being able to touch someone and COMPLETELY copy their powers but only for a short period of time???? I fucking love that a lot. he WOULD be the most powerful out of them!!! I can hear taylors inner analysis dialogue about him now and it's very similar to the clockblocker "DONT LET HIM.TOUCH YOU" panic. loooove imagining this playing off of the rest of pd,,, i know there was AT LEAST one time where he had william sort of transfer some of his ghost powers for a minute? I think it was during the lich fight in the theatre but i just remember vycnent floating and going intangible and NOT KNOWING how to control it or anything. loveeee that. in world dynamics I feel like vyncent would be a late addition to their team (instead of coming from another world maybe he just. had his trigger event happen way later than the other two..or something.) and not trusting them as much at first/being REALLY shaky using either of their powers but after a while being really comfortable in a fight with using either Williams or dakotas powers in a fight. Just like. imagining the fluidity of how they'd work together in a tense situation assuming they're not being complete dumbasses <3333 UGH it's really good
AAAASHE ASHE ASHE IM SOOO SO GLAD YOU INCLUDED ASHE IN THIS I miss him.so much every day. from what I know so far master involves having/making/controlling some sort of minion (cannot think of a better word than that rn) AND I THINK THATS REALLYYYY perfect for ashe. i assume he would actually work pretty closely to canon in that his limitation would be the book? or if he doesn't have the book maybe his limitation would be a) having only a few different types of things he could summon (the big hand, the water fairy, duck etc) and/or b) only being able to control them.for a short amount of time after they're summoned so he has to be quick about dismissing them. can't keep the demon hand around for too long or it might start picking things up and throwing them at random. putting teammates in danger bc he can't control it anymore etc etc. alsooooooo in clockblocker pov they VERY briefly mentioned the possibility of having secondary trigger events (?!!!!?!?!) and you know I locked onto that SO FUCKING HARD. ashe being born with powers and then his secondary trigger event being his mom's death <3 im.NOT even going to attempt to talk about how the trickster would work in worm world/if it would even exist in this setting bc i don't know enough about the types of powers and things yet..but just know. I am keeping this in the back of my mind "this is a fun surprise tool that will help us later" style
#also side note but can i say. thw whole time i was reading the leviathan fight a persistent thought in the back of my mind was#“man i really wish they had a cape here who could control water- THEY NEED TIDE... THEY NEED TIDE SO BAD”#so like..really normal about putting prime defenders SPECIFICALLY in the leviathan fight. teehee (<< most diabolical laugh youve ever heard#I HAVE A LOT MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT WILLIAM TOO BUT..HMMMMMMMMM DONT THINK I CAN SAY SOME OD THEM YET#EXTREMELY interested 2 see whether ur thoughts on specifically him and dakota#will change after both the training arc and certain other events <3#hehehehehehehee#GOD I CANNOT STOP IMAGINING. PD IN WORM.WORLD. they would suffer so fucking badly man.#william wisp guilt complex about his powers turned up to 200#HAVING A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT ASHE ALSOOOOO . AS ALWAYS#now that i know more abt power classes i am VERY confidently going to put mark down as a tinker/striker.#with the tinker rating being SLIGHTLY higher than striker bc he uses the things he makes to amplify his naturally weaker striker powers.#tiiiiiide im thinkingggg would be. whats the elemental one.#not breaker bc thats specifically about breaking physics and i dont think that works for him.#is it shaker?????? i dknt think ive learned shaker yet.#U ARE MORE EQUIPPED AT THIS THAN ME whats tide. tide would also for sure be a case 53 right. i havent exactly learned what that means yet#but im assuming its the whole artifically giving people powers thing and. thats tide baby. idk if clones would work in worm world#so maybe its him and his regular siblings all being specifically given elemental powers#so they could work together as some super crazy powerful team. and then. that Doesnt happen <3#(idk if u have listened to the tide oneshot yet but. its good. if you ignore dodgeboy)#ANYWAY. i should start getting ready for work now. im having so many thoughts about this norlw#hollyyyyyy shit#infected my brain with worms (pun intended)#asks#friends!!!#intertexts#wormposting#jrwi pd#<< only tagging so i can find this later when i learn more and can properly yell about it#new haven wards
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#i think it's a little fucked up but a little funny that my mental state is currently at such a bad point where it's like.#any stress sends me into emotionally constipated panic. where it doesn't really show through for the most part. for the most part i seem ok.#and then if you crack me just even a little bit it's like that one modern art piece can't help myself#where im trying my best to juggle and maintain the facade of being fine but you can tell im tired and one deviation away from crumbling down#but can i cry? haha no. instead i just panic. everything sends me into silent panic. and i just think about really dramatic responses.#i hold my breath and worry that if i do anything wrong everything I've worked so so hard for will just come toppling down#because it has before. something you've poured your heart into. something you've cared so much about. can just be. so. out of your control#and you lose your voice and you lose your agency and you lose your will to fight and you lose a little bit of yourself#I don't know if i will ever get it back. it's been a while. I don't know if i can ever regain my confidence back. i miss who i was sometimes#i used to be warm. i used to be sure of myself. i used to carry hope around like a small star. i miss her. the person i was.#someone who could light up a room without trying so hard. someone who could make others smile without giving it too much thought.#someone who could make others feel good about being there and being alive. i barely feel good about myself these days sometimes. somehow.#I don't know how to be that girl anymore. everything feels a little forced. it shouldn't have to feel this hard. it used to feel natural.#i have moments where i feel like myself again. happy. confident. and then im brought back to reality almost immediately.#i feel guilty for feeling good. i feel guilty for being confident. and then i go hating myself again. it does weigh on me. what she said.#im sorry that i used to like myself. im sorry it made you feel bad about yourself. see. i hate myself now. do you forgive me now? hehe#I'll get over it one day. I'll get over it soon. i hate feeling like this. the overwhelming ego death. it makes me feel really shitty.#i hate this hehe i want to run away so badly but i know running away never solves anything you come back and the problem is still there#so i will go through it and i will fail and i will fall and i will stumble and hurt myself and feel humiliated and terrible throughout#but it will be fine. but I'll get through it and realize it wasn't that bad. I'll get through it and try again and again until i get there.#i need to stop seeking validation from people who won't give it. stop seeking comfort from people who won't give it.#stop hanging with people who make me feel worse. and stuff like that. it's like quitting an addiction hhhh i don't get it#i have friends who treat me really well. i have friends who i love and love me a lot.#i just can't quit certain people. part of it is bc im scared of change and part of it is bc i don't want to be more reliant on others#especially the people i do really care about and love and who love me bc. i think. if i have one more abandonment. i will actually. mm.#i think i would fully lose my ability to love new people haha like. romantically and platonically. haha.#but anyway that's the trauma speaking i will overcome it I won't let it control how i live haha#i will be ok i will be ok spring will be here eventually it's just the seasonal stuff#tw health#delete later
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Quick round-up of a few small projects; Scarf. It is a scarf. Used the remaining silk/wool yarn I had left from when our yarn store closed, the yarn was really thin so I ended up holding it double and yeah, got a really cute, comfy Halloween-y scarf. Very happy to have it. I do regret making the stripes as thick as I did, like they look cute but between that and me making the scarf a smidge too wide, I ended up having to cut the scarf shorter than I would've liked because I didn't have enough yarn to make it any longer- at least not with evenly sized stripes. Like had they been thinner I could've repeated the pattern a little longer, but oh well, it is what it is. With the scrap yarn I just made this ugly little neck warmer, and yeah, it'll keep my neck warm indoors.
And then, using the scrap yarns from the bleeding heart sweater, made a very Crimbus-y beanie. Sidenote but I did actually pre-wash the fucking red yarn before knitting this, because I did not want a repeat of the dye bleeding incident. But yeah, it's a beanie. Again, held the yarn double this time and I'm glad I did because oh, it made the beanie so soft. It is so comfy y'all, I can not wait for December so I can wear it. I still have more of that red yarn left though. No clue what I'm doing with it.
#Moon posting#Yarncraft Diary#Yarnblr#Knitblr#Knitting#Why yes you ARE getting two crafting posts in one day today#Look if my neck gets even a little cold I will end up with a sore throat in an instant. But nothing I own has a high collar/turtleneck#And I don't want to wear scarfs indoors that's just inconvenient for me#So the little neckwarmer actually works fine for me#Hilariously I did actually run out of the white Malabrigo when doing the rim of the beanie#And I was just gonna leave it the way it was but once I was done and looked at it... I just needed a white pompom SO BADLY#The hat looked so sad and miserable without one#So while I was getting the plushie stuffing I did end up getting one ball of like some Drops wool/alpaca yarn (it was on discount too)#Just so I'd have something to make the pompom with because. Yeah I had no white yarn in my stash beyond some thin cotton yarns#Which do not work for making pompoms. (Trust me I tried and ended up wasting yarn) (Used it for plushie stuffing but still)#The natural white of the Drops matches the Malabrigo perfectly though so you literally wouldn't be able to tell it's a different yarn#Like maybe if you looked closely you might notice the rim is knit double (so the actual yarn there is thinner) but that's it#IDK I know what I want my next actual knitting project to be but my scrap yarns are haunting me and I wanna use them up first...#And it is nice to do smaller projects like these from time to time#But also yeah I'm getting tired of trying to figure out What The Fuck To Make with small quantities of yarn
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Slightly, microscopically related to last post but Toon!Catnap & Dogday’s friendship is so important to me. They’re besties, they’re made for each other, they know how to handle each other and calm them down. They’re soulmates to me in the most platonic way I can possibly put it omfg, no-one can understand them the way their sun or moon can
I’m not the biggest fan of Daydream as a romantic ship?? But I don’t really hate it, they’re just the queerplatonics ever to me
#I love the idea that Catnap is the only one DD is vulnerable around#or expresses his negative emotions with#Dogday is the first to hear Nap’s voice and is the only critter to hear it more than once#their relationship is special and I don’t think they need to call each other boyfriend to keep it that way#just thoughts#berryboxed#proxy rambles#which also makes the BBI versions more interesting for me#like you took a pair with a relationship so special it can’t be properly labeled and fucked up SO BADLY that you turned them into that???#skill issue#instead of forming that special bond with Dogday maybe it got mistranslated into Catnap’s obsession with the prototype#Theo’s prior… favorable opinions of it and my interpretation of Nap’s nature would certainly cause that after all
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I have a very funny memory from my dad. When he came out to our friend as not only a system but a fictive of Leonardo he explained that he only formed at the tail end of last summer. Our friend's immediate response was "So you've never gone swimming before" to which internally he just began screaming "WATER?!?!"
The turtle instincts kicked in poor guy wanted to find the nearest lake
#no but I get it I've never gone swimming before either but dang does it sound good#I wanna go swimming SO BADLY....#I could just fill up the bathtub and soak...#but last time one of us took a bath water came out from the kitchen light downstairs 💀#I JUST WANNA SOAK IN SOME WATER..... BE IN MY NATURAL HABITAT....#Just let me be a turtle..#god I need to go swimming when summer starts I'm gonna start clawing the walls#🟢 Coolest guys ever#🪷 Kraang creature talking!!#🪷 Weirdos! (/aff) ➕👤
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"You use the wind to carry you here. You use the forest to hide inside."
"You use all this and you don’t even want to be here."
"You don’t want to live."
-
Like, fuck yes, that's exactly it!
How can you lament that a place wants you dead when don't even want to live in the first place?
#Why do you want so badly to possess a place when all you do is fear and despise it?#I really do think this needs discussed more#I'm obsessed with it#They spend so much time thinking that their conflict is one of Man vs. Nature#Not just with the landscape itself but with Tuunbaq as a representative and protector of that landscape#When really it's anything but that#Man vs. Man#Man vs. Self#Man vs. Society#Take your pick!#Mix and match!#The Terror#The Terror AMC#I'm definitely going to think more and write something longer about where each character fits on that spectrum of conflict#At which points they move between the points on the spectrum#At what point they realise they're doing so and if indeed they realise at all in the first place
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HELP. SORRY. I CAN ONLY VAGUE ABOUT THIS. BUT. HELP. HELP. IT IS ACTUALLY SOOOOO FUCKING UNSETTLING AND DISTRESSING....... god I HOPE this has half as much of a visceral reaction in you guys as this does me bc. Ohhhhh my god it's SO DISTRESSING. IMMENSE PSYCHIC DAMAGE TO ME.
#LIKE. LIKE#it was MEANT to be more subtle. esp more subtle of an expression. still like. ohhh my god i need to make a guide but#it was supposed to be subtle. but it just wasn't Having the Effect. that Jumps out at you and fills you w this unplaceable Horror#IT'S SO FUCKED. IT'S SO FUCKED. IT'S SO UNNATURAL. IT'S SO UPSETTING. INSANELY FUCKED UP#i can't give any more details. i can't spoil this one. just know i'm Dying. BADLY.#ggggooodddddddd this comic is so. beat after beat after beat after beat. like. YOU CAN SEE. THE PARALLELS.#AND THE INFINITE FEEDBACK LOOP. it's just soooooo funny to me bc a lot of it wasn't even intentional#EVEN THOUGH. A LOT A LOT OF IT. WAS METICULOUSLY PLANNED. but like. these guys just Do That themselves.#you put them in a room together and they just do that. naturally. for all of eternity.#something deeply wrong w both of them.
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Last week I helped with a training for one afternoon and we were in a lovely little park by a lovely little stream and many of the salmonberries were ripe! And I couldn't figure out how that snuck up on me so completely. Someone pointed out that it's June and I just laughed it off as how time flies by. Only many hours later I realized-it’s because of my new job. I started at the beginning of May. A month of not being significantly outside near daily after two years of it. That's all it took. Such a short time to come so untethered
#I really am happy about my job! but I have been thinking melancholy thoughts about this#I've really come to value the low key awareness of natural rhythms#Not for a purpose just in general like oh the osoberry leafs out first in the spring and watching the relative order of things#I don't want to be like one of those white girls but when I volunteered on Kuaihelani we had a huli 'ia practice#And regularly communicating our observations of seasonal changes across the landscape legitimately improved my ambient awareness#And...idk I felt like that skill made me more...in context as a creature of the world#So yeah 2 years outside almost every day and I didn't have a log or anything but the general awareness has been a part of me#So to be blindsided so badly#To miss all the middle stages of salmonberry ripening. Not to have a first day of seeing a ripe berry in the field#It's grief. A small petty tremendous grief#Like I'm ok and it's a valuable reminder I need to figure out how to get myself outside closer to every day again but on my own time#But it's real#And so is being happy about my new job genuinely! I just needed to express this too and I don't have great spaces to do that#So here we are! Thanks for listening if you're still here haha
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Sometimes I think a lot about my mom's cat
My mom's cat is a common domestic shorthair we found on the side of the road as a kitten
Regular cat, not a maine coon or one of those massive breeds. His mom was smaller than a loaf of bread
But in a sort of a Clifford The Big Red Dog situation, he grew super fast, and really really big, and took a super long time to stop growing
Worried that she was overfeeding him, she eased back his portions, but he stayed a massive round baby
When he started having kidney problems, she took him to the vet.
The vet took a look at him and said, "holy fuck, what are you feeding him", checked the nutritional listings on his chow, and told her "Yeah, maybe he's reacting badly to the amount of grain in this, try a meatier diet"
So my mom wound up special-ordering this specific high-protein prescription cat food made of like. Kangaroo meat or some shit that cost like sixty bucks a bag
And, as typical act two in an episode of House, he somehow got worse on the fancy specialized stuff that was supposed to be Primo Athlete Olympic Feline Blend
Like. WAY worse. His guts were inflamed and his kidneys were shutting down and he was all sore and HE WAS STILL HUGE, just miserable and sad
So shetook him back to the vet, where they had to help him pee (he was apparently close to bursting and had some kind of blockage too) and went "Yeah no this is NOT normal and we don't know what's going on, we're gonna do some tests but in the meantime you should go back to what he was eating before, at least that wasn't actively killing him" so she did
And he still wasn't great, but he also improved
And so they take his blood and do an ultrasound and a couple g's later she gets a call back like "this is gonna sound crazy, but we want you to put him on a low-meat diet. Just the least amount of protein and iron and shit. We need you to find the grainiest, filler-iest dollar tree kibble available and give him some of that bad bad shit"
And my mother is a woman of science. So she did
And he GOT BETTER
His energy picked back up, inflammation went down, he started drinking normally again, got back to pissing like a fuckin champion
And so it turns out that out of all the random ass freeway bonus cats we possibly could have scooped out of a ditch, WE got the one-in-a-million freak of nature with a SPECIFIC genetic defect that means a paleo protein free range diet is essentially poison and he THRIVES on cheap ass garbage
Like. He medically NEEDS junk food
I dont really understand how that works, but i cant argue with results.
If we had four of him, they'd outweigh my mom. And he's FINE
Also blind, but that's unrelated
Im not using him as a symbol or a metaphor or anything. I just keep catching myself thinking about my mom's Big Fucking Cat
#I'm sorry#I feel like this is supposed to be some kind of message from the universe#Like maybe I'm the cat and the garbage food is. Something#But nope he just lives in my head rent free#The biggest fucking boy
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(me yapping so much in the tags is how i found out the limit is 30 tags 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠 so here's the rest of my thoughts 😭😭😭)
ROXIEEEEEEEE ILYSM THIS IS AN INSTANT FAVE AND GONNA BE MY FREQUENT REREAD
HUGGGINGGGGG YOUUUU SQUEEZING YOUUU OMG
i'm so glad to have you as my fellow caleb girlie in my life
sniffling these little caleb ficlets of yours always hitting such the right spot
ilysm wishing you to always have sweet dreams and no more nightmares
✨️manifesting only caleb dreams for you✨️
💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
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≡;-꒰ 𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐁 ꒱₊˚ ପ⊹ I 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚, 𝒌𝒊𝒔𝒔 𝒊𝒕 𝒃𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓
╰┈➤ ❝ caleb x afab!reader | smut nsfw 18+ mdni
tags : pwp (with plot; honestly more fluff-centric with a lil smut towards the end <3), mention of nightmares, comfort, kissing, cuddling, heavy petting, dry humping, praise, dirty talk, inappropriate use of evol (kinda), use of pet names "baby" "princess", + "pipsqueak" like… once. lmk if i missed any tags !
wc : 2.4k
an : AAAAA i gave in 😭 some of you may know that im a chronic nightmare haver and. absolutely nothing . n o thi ng !!!!!!!!! is going to stop me from writing fluffy smut with the love of my life JSNFBWHF (++ mildly inspired by @starmocha 's post, ily you keep me (in)sane <3)
taglist : under the cut! (SIGN UP HERE)
KO-FI JAR / COMMISSIONS
You can't sleep, but at least he's right there to help you.
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"Caleb…"
It started with a soft nudge.
"Caleb?"
There was no reply.
Your head lifted then, momentarily leaving the comfort of the pillow… only to be met with stillness. You could feel a huff threatening to spill from your lips, ever indignant over moments of lack of attention from him—yet, the dark of the room reminded you exactly where you were. A glance at the clock on his bedside table showed you an hour you shouldn't be awake at; not normally, at least. And if that wasn't enough, then the silent, sleeping figure next to you would have proved it.
It wasn't fair to wake him up. You were the odd one out.
And, yet…
And, yet…
You pursed your lips.
A beat.
Two beats.
Three.
"Caaaaleeebbb…."
His name turned into a whine, and this time, you sat up, reaching to roll him over onto his back.
Thankful as you were of his general attentiveness to you, you watched a little wave of recognition wash over him.
"…Hmh? Pip..squeak…?"
A hand reached out to rub at his eyes, voice thick and raspy, the lower octave jumping out to you. And with that unfocused gaze, and those slow movements… He wasn't quite awake.
Sheepishly, you pawed at his arm.
"Sorry, can't sleep…" you mumbled.
"Mmm… That's a shame, 'cause I sure can…"
You looked at him with a frown.
Still asleep, my ass.
The lazy smile on his face contrasted with the droopy eyes his expression still wore, and yet, he was still clearly awake enough to tease. You knew he was only getting under your skin on purpose, but nevertheless, you wanted at least a smidge of comfort—you huffed in an indignant manner, reaching out to give his shoulder a little punch in protest.
At your motions, he laughed quietly.
"Alright, alright. C'mere."
He reached out to ruffle your hair, and there was a slight moment of pause. You watched him scan your figure—there was a sort of appreciation to it, a soft, fond gaze that felt a lot like… Home. And then with a yawn and a stretch, his arms tugged you closer to his body until you hadn't much of a choice but to roll over on top of him, his arms circling around your torso to gently hold you in place against him.
"Better?" he murmured.
You could feel the rise and fall of his chest, the little thrum of his voice as he spoke—it was a low whisper in your ear, still somewhat fighting the sleep from his tone, but just soft enough to lull you into a sense of comfort.
A small smile spread on your lips.
"Mhm," you nodded against him; "A little."
He allowed you to move and adjust yourself over him, legs resting neatly on either side of his waist, your body curled right into him with your head resting right above where his heart would be.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
You smiled.
He felt safe.
"...Only a little, though? What's up? Nightmare?"
There was a yawn to his voice, and slowly, you felt him begin to absentmindedly run his hand up and down your back.
In truth, he didn't need to ask. He knew you well enough—you were like this often; there weren't reasons otherwise to why you would be awake at this hour. And he knew, too—there would be no sleeping for you until you could forget whatever images you'd seen in your head just moments ago. You needed a distraction.
He would provide it.
You felt him nuzzle his nose into your hair, planting a series of chaste kisses, the pad of his thumb placing a little bit more pressure onto your back if only to reassure you that he was there.
That everything would be alright.
"Mm… Hard to close my eyes when I can still see it…" You sighed and tilted your head, chin resting atop his chest as you cherished the way his other hand had moved to gently stroke through your hair.
"Yeah? S'okay, I'll stay up with you." You could see the way the sleep had more or less worn off of his features, almost as if the only thing that mattered to him in the moment was staying alert enough to help you fall back asleep first.
It was kind of adorable.
Your eyes softened, enough to let out a playful roll of your eyes. "Aww, look at you being all warm and caring~"
"And, what? You'd rather I not be? Says the girl who's always come runnin' back to me after falling and scraping her knee at the playground!"
"Hey, that's different! It really hurt, you know?! You were there!"
"Uh-huh. And might I add you were runnin' from some supposed ghost of the swing set, just 'cause it wouldn't stop moving?"
"Ugh, don't you bring that back! I didn't understand the laws of physics yet! What else can you do when you're ten and not a science gal?!" The smug little smirk on his face was infuriating enough, and were you not so comfortably snuggled up in his arms, you'd have reached out to smack it off of him yourself. "I am not a kid anymore, thank you very much."
But if you thought he'd use your indignance to push your buttons a little further, to your surprise, his only response was a chuckle. His head leaned down to kiss the top of your forehead; "'Course I know that, you're all grown up now. Just… Where would you be without me, am I right?" He smiled, and this time, his hand slide over from the top of your head over to the side of your face. Gently, gently, he coaxed your head up a little bit, palm cupping your cheek with a little caress of his thumb. "Some things don't change. And since you are my princess, then I gotta give you the princess treatment."
Giggling a little, you shifted slightly to nuzzle your nose against his. "…Geez. Okay, I concede. 'Specially when you call me that."
"Princess? You really like that one, huh?"
And despite the laugh in his voice; despite the playful roll of his eyes right back at you, he leaned in to place a soft kiss on your lips.
One kiss.
Two.
Light, feathery touches that fall into soft, breathy laughs—
Another kiss, and then another.
Slowly, you found yourselves lost in a quiet moment of feeling each other like this, foreheads pressed together, fingers gently running through strands of hair.
So close— so… comforting.
"Feelin' better, baby?" he murmured.
And you realized that the pointless bickering, the little bit of reminiscing—all that he'd done by means of pulling you far away from your dreams and into the reality that you shared with him.
Because it was really, truly, all that mattered in the end.
Smiling softly, your gaze dropped back to his lips as you placed a little kiss to each corner, cherishing the soft huff of laughter that fell from his own.
"Mhm," you whispered. "Much, much better."
So close, so comforting.
You could look into his eyes—warm, and pretty, and so inherently him—and they would be the only things you'd care to look at.
"D'you wanna sleep now? Or…" There was a playful lilt to the way he spoke, and his eyebrow raised—you could feel him press your lower back a little bit more against him, the subtle way his hand dipped lower to rest upon the curve of your ass. You didn't miss the smirk that edged at his lips. "If you're not sleepy yet, I could think of a couple ways to make you sleepy…"
Typical Caleb.
You swat at his arm playfully, a louder laugh falling from your lips. "Caleb! It's, like, three in the morning! I though you were sleepy?!"
"Uh, yeah, I am. But clearly you aren't."
"But that's 'cause—!"
You caught the roll of his eyes as he leaned up to give you another little kiss, and then promptly gave you a look.
"Heyyy. It'd help you sleep, right?" he offered a lazy smile. "And I told you I'd help you. You're in a pretty ideal position too, you know."
You were used to being curled up on his chest like this, but now that he'd suggested it, you had to realize that he was right—and perhaps as a little test, perhaps because you couldn't help it, you gave a little experimental roll of your hips.
The immediate gasp was more of a reaction than you'd expected, and then even you couldn't help the knowing smirk from spreading across your features.
"Shit— oh, that's how we're doin' this, huh?" He spoke through gritted teeth, but his hands had already slid down to rest at your hips. "Gonna use me to get yourself off, s'that it?"
"You suggested it!" you shot back, "don't you take back your words!"
"Oh, don't you worry about that. No way in hell am I takin' back anythin', princess." Another lazy grin despite the firm hold he had on your hips, and he cocked his head to the side. "Well? Go on, baby, do your thing."
It was near embarrassing how easily he could have you dripping wet with just his words, with his voice, yet you knew with certainty that you could have the same effect—every tentative roll of your hips brought out such delicious sighs from his lips, and you could watch with glee the way his eyes would flutter shut. You'd never been more grateful for the thin fabric of your pajamas; the stiff outline of his erection pressed so perfectly against you that the barrier almost didn't matter at all.
"Caleb…" you gasped. You'd fall into him as the movement of your hips sped up, and you could already feel the messy slick that had seeped right through your clothing.
"Keep goin' baby, just like that. Lemme feel you…" One hand slid back up your body, dipping beneath your shirt to caress your skin. "Such a pretty lil princess. You like this, huh? Grindin' all over me like this?"
His palm pressed into your skin—more, he mouthed. Faster.
And you nearly cried as you swallowed your own moans against his lips, feeling the way his hands dug back into your hips, urging you, urging you, guiding your hips into a frenzied rhythm.
Mindless.
Needy.
"M-mmhf, not— mm—! N-not enough, need m— mm—!" You moaned between kisses, and your eyes nearly rolled back into your head as the pressure around you steadily increased.
You knew what he was doing.
The minute he pulled back from your lips to take in the dazed look in your eyes, lips nearly red and swollen, you could see the surge of pride flash in his eyes.
"C-Caleb…" you whined. The hold on your hips was nearly bruising, but it was nothing compared to the way he'd push you so harshly against him, practically digging the shape of his cock into the dampness of your clothing. Slowly, slowly, you felt the cool air of the night hit your thighs, your wet slick mapping over his cock as your pajamas slid down to expose your panties.
Your hands gripped tightly onto his arms—
He wasn't lifting a finger.
"Ch-cheater…!" You huffed. "You can't…! C-can't use—hnng— y-your evol, like…!"
He only chuckled. "No? You said you needed more, though. C'mon, baby… S'okay, I got you. Gonna make you feel so good."
You groaned, burying your head into his chest, allowing him to move your hips as he saw fit.
Every needy drag and grind of your clothed cunt right against him had you soaking his clothing, pushing onto him, chasing that friction. And now that he wasn't kissing you—now that he had his hands free to roam your body, to tangle into your hair, to feel you…
He chuckled, pressing his lips down to your ear. "That’s right, moan so pretty f'me. Lift your head a lil, let me hear you, baby. Tell me how good you feel."
The tip of his cock grazed your clit, and your nails nearly dug into him with a cry. "W-wait—!"
Obedient.
You lifted your head to look at him, but your gaze refused to focus. A blur of hazy pleasure had you panting, moaning incoherent words…
He wasn't even in you yet.
"C-Caleb, wait, I need… I need you, ple— please, please, just fuck me, I-I can't…!"
You shivered, feeling his fingers reach up to trail the side of your neck with ghostly touches.
"You really do wanna make me do all the work, huh…"
"N-no, I, I just…!"
"Wanna cum, right? Well, nothin' here to stop you, baby. C'mon… You can do it, I know you can. I'm helpin' you already, you know?"
Your chest heaved, and you knew he was right. Every movement had you nearly crying, your hips rutting against him and nearly jerking each time he would lift to grind up into you. The pressure from his evol made you dizzy, and you could feel the pleasure building, and building, and building—
Out of the blurry haze of your vision, you could see him give you another smirk, and his lips were back against your ear.
"Cum for me, baby."
He pressed you tight against him, forcing himself to feel you, groaning into your ear at the way your body shook with a pleasure so undeniable.
"There we go, there we go, that's it..." Soft murmurs into your hair, hands rubbing comfortingly over your back. And as the intensity of your orgasm slowly faded away, you felt him pepper kisses into your hair, his arms wrapped around you in a hug so secure.
You were aching, sensitive. He was right; you could feel the fatigue settling over your body, every heave of your chest slowly lulling you to sleep—
He wasn't about to let you.
He flipped you over within seconds, his eyes raking over your body so intensely that you keened under the drag of his gaze.
It didn't matter that you'd begun to feel a little sleepy; you knew he wasn't done with you.
"C- Caleb, you…"
He brought a finger down to your cunt, your slick gathering in an instant. He brought it up to his lips; gave a little bit of lick. "Such a mess. Ugh, sorry, baby, I think I won't be able to sleep 'til I get my fill… Let me stay up a bit longer?"
A press to your clit had you doubting the puppy-like gaze he'd given you, and you groaned—
So hard to resist.
"You're making this up to me in the morning…"
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taglist : @darlingdummycassandra @milkandstarlight @thoupenguinman @valyvinny @rafayelsheart @jellyroom2 @chemiru @ywnzn @pepprrmint @angel-jupiter @cordidy @raiyuxa @xai-mery @pikachuzhc @pixelcafe-network @interstellar-inn @hunters-association
an : that thing with the swing.. that's uh. that's based on personal experience. 😭
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#love and deepspace#love and deepspace caleb#‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾. lnds writings ☆ 》#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#WDYM I GET TO WAKE UP TO FLUFFY CALEB SMUT THAT I WAS LOWKEY AN INSPO FOR#😭😭😭😭😭 ✨️GOOD MORNING TO MEEEEEEEE✨️#i am devouring this RIGHT NOWWW#(incoming: gushing and squealing in the tags because i am a Certified Tag Yapper™)#'mmm… that's a shame 'cause I sure can…' — stopppp he's so cute i started smiling stupidly in bed 😭😭😭#there was a sort of appreciation to it#a soft#fond gaze that felt a lot like… home — caleb being home will always be my truth#i am so weak to this because it brings me such comfort#HE brings me such comfort ahhh why am i tearing up i'm so so pathetic for him but idc 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺#'better?“ he murmured — help why did this get me so badly it's just one line but i can hear his voice and see his expression so clearly 🥺🥺#djskkskssk omggggg the way we're curling into him 😭😭😭😭😭#'yeah? s'okay i'll stay up with you' — goshhhh everything just feels so natural to him#the way his instinct is to always take care of you first and foremost and that's that#the pet names. the pet nameeeeessssss. 💖💖💖💖💖#i am immediately changing his nickname for me the moment i can in-game need this frfr 😔👉👈#he offered a lazy smile 'and i told you i'd help you. you're in a pretty ideal position too you know' — DJIEEISJSKSK KDOEDSJKWJSJ !!!!!!!!!!#😭😭😭😭😭#🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏#'gonna use me to get yourself off s'that it?' — 🥹 pls gege? 🥹#'such a pretty lil princess you like this huh? grindin' all over me like this?' — oh fuck. not a single word in this sentence i didn't like#← this user is pathetic for caleb when he calls her pretty especially with ✨️THAT VOICE✨️#inappropriate evol usage djskksiejdis i cannot be turned on by that i won't i won'ttttt🗿#(unfortunately i adore his gravity manipulation evol a little too much 😔)#DJOWHFDKKSLS HIS PUPPY GAZE SJSKKSKS WHATEVER YOU WANT HONEY#← this user is pathetic for caleb ✨️BUT SHE LIKES IT✨️
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