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nocturnesanomaly · 5 months ago

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Chapter 5: Is your blood authentic?

(Series Masterlist: Divine Violence) (Read on Ao3) (Inspired Playlist)

Series: The Divine Violence - chapter 5: Is your blood authentic?

Wordcount: 6.1K

Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x John "Soap" MacTavish x Gn!Reader

TW: (View masterlist for series tw and tags) - DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT, Religious Trauma, PTSD, Flashbacks, Hallucinations, Anxiety, Paranoia, Disturbing themes, Grooming, depiction of suicide, self harm, blades

Description: You make plans to finally ship out, getting ever closer to your fate.

A/N: Hope you enjoy my work!

[Prev chapter / Next Chapter]

Simon has been absolving his distance a lot faster than you can handle.

He did as he promised, tries to go slow and from the beginning, yet the history between the two of you prevent you from feeling like it's a true beginning. It feels like you're both hiding from it, the looming truth over either of you. He doesn't fully know what happened, he doesn't know why your pen pal ship ended.

Even when it had begun it was tense, more distant than you wanted. Yet you clutched onto those letters from him like lifeline, no matter how much it burnt to read them over and over again, to whisper his words out in the night like a prayer.

You had wet those papers with your tears, crushed them, tore them and taped them back together. You had held those papers tightly in your hands, much like how you hold the files on the man you're meant to detain.

"We have to be discreet, if he senses something is up, he could get spooked and skip" Price proposes. He's holding a fat cigar between his lips; the smoke makes you dizzy. When he had originally been gracious enough to ask if it was alright, you had been enough of a sucker to nod your head.

Simon stood beside you in a rigid stance. He had said nothing either, so who were you to deny the captain his bread and butter.

"It's a small-time, close-knit community but new residents aren't foreign, tourists even less so. If we pose as one of them, stay low, don't attract attention nobody should suspect as anything other than another group of careless tourists." You offer up your idea to the room. You wish he would open a window.

Captain Price takes another long drag from his cigar; he keeps the smoke in for so long you think he might actually choke on it before he let's it go. "Hm, not a bad idea, gives us the advantage" his eyes flicker to Simon taking note of his careful gaze towards the scattered plans on the table.

"Ghost?"

You don't know when he turned this quiet. Even when you were kids, he was never the most talkative person in the class, but he was never this brooding. He's honed his focus a lot more over the years, you wish you could say the same for yourself.

You really wish the captain would open his window. Not only is the smoke starting to smell bad, but the smoke is already hazing the already dimly lit office. Meeting this late in the evening hadn't been your ideal choice, but the captain is a busy man as he said.

"If they find us out, we could be overrun quicker than we could defend ourselves" Simon speaks up after a moment of thought, "we have no idea how many they actually have."

"It's a risk we'll have to take if we're meant to make any progress," Price says while still holding clear consideration for the lieutenant’s proposed dilemma. Simon was objectively right, if the collective were to get aggressive it's likely they wouldn't be able to fend them off. Still death was an unlikely scenario, it wouldn't be their first resort.

He doesn't seem keen on the idea either way. "Even with Spider's intel it's a lot of uncertainty, what they have brought is extensive but...not much in the same lane," he glances towards you. His eyes say nothing but his gesture seems almost apologetic. You don't get why.

Most of the intel you brought on the cult was extensive but only scraped the tip of the iceberg. The things you once knew about the cult could have been changed, and most of the things you had on paper got burned when you went into hiding. All you had now was the few official documents that still counted, and your memory that often times don't serve you all that well.

"Spider?" Price asks confused. Your stomach drops. It hadn't even registered in your brain that he had used the nickname in front of a superior. "You two made up then," he smiles.

What.

"We're fine," Simon interjects before you can cast that bewildered glance you so desperately want to, "civil."

"Works for me," Price shrugs his beard creasing in a weird way when he adjusts his smile. "Spider could work for a good callsign, should you ever consider joining up with us again," he proposes. He is getting way ahead of himself.

"Unlikely..." you whisper quietly in response, the word concealed behind a heavy exhale. "We'll need to make our move soon. We don't actually know whether he will be in one town or the other, and if he is how long will he be."

"I'll clear it with Laswell and with any luck we ship out in the evening, there's no use delaying" Price concludes with a nod "can't waste our talents away here when we're needed out there."

Johnny hasn't felt this anxious in a long time. It borders excitement, but he wouldn't dare call it that openly. The promise of actual direction, the promise of being able to do something worthwhile, plus an interesting new recruit with them left him buzzing with newfound energy.

It has him pacing back and forth in his room, still with energy in his muscles even after Simon had dragged him to the gym in an attempt at tiring him out. "Would you calm down," Simon grumbles at him when he continues to pace back and forth.

The mental checklist in Johnny's head kept getting disordered. He had already packed what he needed for mission; it was an indefinite stay so the restrictions on what he could bring was more lax than usual. He doubted they would get much free time between the work they needed to conduct, but he'd be damned if he didn't put in some time to relax with his sketchbook.

There was a lot to keep focus on, a lot to keep track of and with his brain already focused on the wrong things it was difficult to not get into a frustrated confusion. "Johnny," Simon calls out when he doesn't stop.

He still doesn't answer, and keeps walking back and forth between the duffel bag in front of the bed and the dresser in the other side of the room. He needed to recheck his clothes. Did he have enough socks?

"Johnny."

He did have his pen, right? Extras. He should get extras if there was still space. Who knows how long they'd be staying, until they had something more concrete on the target mayhaps, more likely until there was a more finalized outcome on the whole thing.

"MacTavish..."

He really hoped it wouldn't surpass Christmas. His mother would be furious if he didn't make it home, it's been too long since he was able to see her and the rest of the family again, and despite Simon's apprehensions he knew they'd all want to see him too now that they've finally warmed up to each other.

"Hey! MacTavish, come help me."

Like a chord snapping in his brain, he spins on his heel to come plop down to his knees Infront of the bed where Simon has been sitting impatiently. "What is it," he huffs out looking up into his partners eyes. They had a way of being so expressive even behind the mask and the eye black, it had taken him a long time to learn to read them properly.

"Hold it," Simon hands off a small roll of support bandages into his hands. Johnny gives him an unimpressed look. Simon had been struggling with pains in his wrist, which was ironic as that was usually where he ended up himself with excessive drawing.

"Ye should really change it...get this one washed" he scrunches his nose up pretending there was a smell to get the dramatic effect across.

"I'll do it before we go," Simon mumbles and stretches out his wrist so it pops. His mask twists when, as Johnny assumes, he pulls his face into a grimace. "What's on your mind love," he mumbles out afterwards.

"All of it," Johnny huffs nursing the roll in his hands.

"Out of the ordinary?"

"Yeah, just everything about them," he thinks back to you, back to the meeting. You had been an antsy thing ever since he met you. He had chalked it up to you being shy, but later on he realized that wasn't exactly the case. You weren't as much shy as you were just anxious 99 percent of the time.

"Been getting along with them?" Simon reaches out to grab the roll from him again.

"Let me..." he mumbles reaching out to take a hold of Simon's wrist instead. He begins wrapping it around just like how he wants.

"Yeah, I have," he continues. "Ah think anyway..."

"They're difficult," Simon characterizes you rather nonchalant.

"They're new," Johnny corrects him, "they just need a little time, a little push. I still remember what you were like when I first met you, cold bastard"

"I remember you to be a pain my arse" Simon scoffs and turns over his hand so it's easier to wrap the rest of it.

"Still am sir" He answers cheekily.

He finishes the last wrap around his wrist, sealing it with the two little clasps. He watches as Simon retracts his hand, flexing it and almost stretching it too much before he could stop him. He had been there a few times himself; he knew how restrictive it felt, but any rest would do. It would be hard to get more rest for it when they deployed very soon.

"I like them," Johnny perks up again. "They can be charming in their own way; ah don't even have to drag them to lunch anymore they come willingly."

Simon snorts quietly in response, huffing out amused.

"Ah think yer little talk helped them calm down a bit, they seem more relaxed around me and Garrick too. Still tense but..eh...relaxed. Not so much of a laugh that one, but ah think they just need a bit more time, they have a funny side ah can feel it," he says with a light-hearted smirk.

"Lot of hope coming from you, taking a real liking to them then?" Simon asks, little crinkles forming in the corners of his eyes indicating the smirk beneath his mask.

"Can't tell me ye haven't? Used to like 'em something fierce didn't ye?" Johnny turns a suggestive look, one that is only reciprocated by a groan from his partner. He slowly rises off the floor and back to his feet, his knees starting to throb from the harsh wooden panels.

"That was a long time ago," Simon reaches out for him, puts his hands on his hips to pull him closer.

"But you did. They are a cute one, I definitely see the appeal" Johnny lifts a suggestive eyebrow. Though he somehow doubted it would happen, it wouldn't be the first time they had shared a person, it wouldn't be last if it turned out like it always did. For a brief moment he allowed himself to indulge in a pointless fantasy.

"Careful, Johnny. You don't know them like I do."

"Yeah, well ah seem to have a lot of luck with dark, gloomy, emotionally constipated bastards," he says with a smirk on his face. Simon's hands squeeze the meat on his thighs.

"I don't think they're interested in us like that. Don't got half a mind to know what they've been through; they seem very determined to get the job over and done with quick."

Johnny scoffs at that. He had always found it amusing how Simon couldn't see what was right in front of him. He was right that you weren't showing the same interest that Johnny was looking for, but the subtle attention you put into the details of your surroundings was noticeable.

"Ye have no idea how they look at ye then," Johnny blows air out through his nose, "got ways to go in warming up to myself but ye...ye already got them locked in."

"Easy." Simon says his hands traveling up to grab Johnny's wrists. It gets his attention, gets him to pause. "Just..." Simons clears his throat, "Just go easy on them, we don't know how they'd even feel about that. It's hardly professional, and they don't seem enticed in anything that isn't."

"Bit stuck up then?" Johnny mentions cheekily.

His smile drops when Simon gives him a look. "I'll go easy Simon, jus' jokin' around..." he turns his smile warmer, more welcoming to ease the looming anxiety that's no doubt building in his partners chest.

Johnny brings his hands to Simon's shoulders. They glide over them, squeezing at pressure points he knows gets his partner to relax. He trails his hands up, letting them hold the sides of his neck.

He doesn't miss the way Simon's breath hitches. He smiles at it, only satisfied when Simon finally allows himself to close his eyes and release the air in his lungs through a deep sigh. It wouldn't be the first time they would have invited a third into their bed, though he can see how this would be different for Simon.

He's typically not this worked up over a person. Then again this would be the closest Simon had to family that was still left, and he hadn't even been in contact for years. While he had originally meant the suggestion as a joke to lighten the mood, Simon hadn't exactly said no. It got further questions to stir in his mind, he would make sure to get answers one way or another eventually.

"At the end of the day it's jus' a mission like any other," Johnny reassures him, "with them or not."

Simon stirs, leans forward to bury his face in Johnny's stomach. It makes him feel mushy inside. "I'll tell you eventually...everything." Simon mumbles against him.

"I know..." he let's out a soft breath of relief, his arms moving to encircle around Simon's head instead. He leans down to place a kiss on his scalp. "Whenever ye're ready, we've done this before" he reassures him.

By nightfall it's reaching freezing temperatures. None of the clothes on your body is yours, and its warmth feels superficial. The plane is different than what you're used to, not so much packed to the teeth as what you'd have thought. Laswell was already having your new place of residence prepared with everything you needed.

You had always known her to be a resourceful woman. There wasn't much you could ask of her that she wouldn't be able to get you, the only real question was whether she wanted to or not.

Gaz took your bag from you, throwing it with the rest under a couple of seats. He had clearly stopped questioning your lack of belongings, though he seemed to find it no less weird.

"You got everything?" he asks looking you over as if you were supposed to be hiding something beneath your fuzzy jacket. You nod your head, finding no energy to offer him a verbal response.

The rest had already settled in, with their own things tucked neatly away. You didn't miss a lot about the military, but there was something to be said about the clean order enforced.

You walk past Simon and Soap, sparing them half a glance. Their hands are pressed against each other, a sorry attempt at making their affection subtle. You take a seat besides the captain. He's got a beanie on, tucked into a coat looking just as fuzzy as your own.

His eyes are closed, head tilted back, his hands folded neatly in his lap as if he were in a meeting. "You got a problem spider?" he asks amused, sensing your stare. Your chest heats up, your neck too from the sudden rush of blood.

You can't decide whether you dislike the new nickname or not. It sounds weird coming from his mouth; it sounds weird coming from anyone but Simon. It had been something intimate once, then it died along with some old memories, only to be reawakened on the wrong tongue.

"No sir."

You rip your eyes away from him, you could admire his beard from afar. The spiking pain you've been ignoring starts to come back through your nerves when you start to feel something warm and smooth trickle in your palm. Masking your hand with your other, you unwrap the chain from your wrist and pry the little crucifix from your skin. You wipe the fresh blood on your cargos, taking a moment let yourself linger on it.

You're getting closer to the source now, closer than you've been in a long time. There was little chance to back out now, but you knew you still wanted to. The only thing to carry you forward back into the den of wolves were the pure hatred you held for it. You could do little from afar, you needed to get in real close if you were to set it ablaze one last time.

You could already see it in your mind. Another system set on fire, coated in oil and with a single lighter flame, you could burn it all down like you were taught to. You could bring down the hellfire on the right person this time.

"Oh, are ye religious?" the feint Scottish accent pulls you out of your fiery thoughts. You clutch the chain back into the little wound you've created. It stings beautifully.

"No."

Liar, liar, liar.

You tuck it back around your neck, hiding it beneath the layers that feel foreign on your skin. It's heavier than normal.

The chain rests comfortably beneath the military slacks that was just one size too big. Your heart is all the way up in your throat, pounding furiously against your ribcage. You had been ignoring the nausea for the last 10 minutes, but one encouraging clap on your back from a teammate had you bucking over and heaving for air.

You could still hear his mocking laugh at the sight.

When you had finally agreed to join up, you had expected it to be hard but not this excruciating. You'd had at least 10 thoughts of quitting this morning alone. Though you couldn't deny there was a sense of community among your teammates, you also couldn't seem to penetrate the invisible barrier that kept you from being apart of that community.

The sun is blaring atop the blue sky making it hard to see. Sweat dripples down your forehead, you no longer know whether it's from the heat of the sun, or from the drills you've been running the entire morning.

Everybody here had their own layer of cruelty to them. It could loud and brash like the group on base that you always made sure to avoid, or it could be quieter more calculated. Ones you had fallen for more than once before learning your lesson. You tiptoed around it, making yourself just good enough to qualify without standing out terribly much.

"You alright?"

You raise your head to look at her. About the only person you could rely on even a little here. You had joined up around the same time, through the same unconventional way. She had taken notice of you first, practically pushed her way through the crowd to introduce herself to you specifically. The weirdness of it in general was still throwing you off till this day.

"Thanks, Emma...yeah I'll live" you accept her outstretched hand offering support despite not truly needing it. At least she had always been nice, never demanding.

She claps her hand over your back, letting out the sweetest sunshine giggle you've ever heard. It makes you want to barf, yet you can't help but love it all the same. A nice cooling gust of winds pass the two of you, and her hand shoots up in a protective manner for her hair. She was still seeming to struggle with her new hairstyle, long black hair wound up in the tightest bun known to man. How her scalp isn't hurting constantly you have no idea.

"Don't worry, lunch will be here soon, can get some nutrition into you- "

A loud whistle interrupts her and sets everyone into motion. She quickly grabs onto your arm to pull you over in the forming line. You do your best to bite back on the hiss of pain, when her thumb presses down on the bruise beneath your long sleeves.

You straighten your back after she has practically shoved you into formation, eager to have you do it right on time. Her own version of a kind gesture after you came last three times in a row, and got pointed out even more than that.

One of your superiors starts walking down the line with someone else awfully familiar. You keep your eyes straight whenever your superior looks your way, but you manage to catch a glimpse of who he is. The man who got you into the whole thing in the first place. You hold back the excitement in your chest.

He stands tall, a true leader, blonde hair sleeked back and an expression on his face that would send any recruit running. It makes you smile. You had a lot to learn from him, and he had promised to teach you.

Your eyes dart to a furry companion he had brought. A big dog, you think. It looks a little too big to just be a dog, a little too wild for you to trust it wouldn't bite. It walks perfectly in line with him, it's tail swaying slowly behind it. Its coat is beautiful if it wasn't for the giant red cross painted across its head and down it's muzzle.

It has something uneasy stirring in your stomach. You force your gaze back up, catching yourself staring at him, he's staring back. He nods towards you, and sends you a smile that makes your legs feel like jelly.

His office is pristine. Not a single thing out of place, not a speck of dust to be found. It didn't get used often. He was always out travelling between places of God knows where, doing things that was to prepare for His grand plan. Or so he said anyway.

"Come in," he calls on you, your name sweet on his lips like the beckoning echo of weeping angels. He'd finally show you the way, like he had promised in the graveyard turned to ash. His elbows rest on his desk, his chin prepped on top of his folded hands as he regards you with a cold gaze.

You advance without falter in your step, coming to a stop at a more respectable distance. The same overgrown dog was resting in a corner of the room. Its black eyes follow you your every movement, as if just waiting for the command to strike at you.

"I'm not going to waste your time with menial formality," he slides an open convolute across the table, yet it's still too far away to read the small text. A formal invitation he clearly doesn't expect you to actually read.

"You'll be finishing your basic training soon, and what will happen to you next will be decided." He takes a moment to watch your reaction, but you remain stoic, giving him a simple nod in confirmation. "I've made a couple of deals to have you transferred directly under my care for my own initiative. All I need is for you to...agree to it," his tone turns leading, his eyes never leaving yours.

"Ofcourse, I'll agre-"

He speaks your name sternly, cutting you off before you can go on your rant about how you were practically ready to devote your life to this thing, whatever it was.

"I need to know that you'll be in it, truly in it. This new project is unconventional to what you've previously been exposed to. It will test your patience, your willpower, your faith. Do you believe you have the strength for it? Do you believe your blood is authentic? and will you be ready to spill it for the cause being run in His name?"

You nod fast. Too fast.

"Good, I didn't expect anything else from you. You'll be finishing your training here, I believe there may be others among your rank that would be inclined to join our cause as well, I expect you to find them and lead them towards the path."

He looks at you with an unrivalled determination, a fire roaring loud and hot inside him to drive him towards his goal. His expression doesn't leave much room for question or doubt, and before you can even comprehend what you're agreeing to, you take the first real step in.

"Don't worry, I have someone in mind, sir."

It's a little cabin in the distance. Laswell hadn't promised anything luxurious, you were there on "vacation," but you apparently couldn't afford something proper closer to the town itself. Still the sorry thing that tips over in hill in the distance made you want to turn around and walk the 30 minutes back to the plane.

You knew it was going to be an uncomfortable few weeks, if the ache in your body had anything to say for it. You had already declared snow your new mortal enemy in the first ten minutes of walking through the forest and sinking into the ground with each step.

There had already been the expectation and the preparations for a colder climate, but you hadn't expected to have snow up to your midthigh in some areas. Luckily it didn't go that deep near the dedicated paths. Some of them must be irregularly cleaned for tourists.

You've been walking at an irregular pace yourself, getting continuously passed by the others until Simon fell into step with you a few minutes ago. He blends in with his surroundings uncannily, each step he takes is thought out, quieter than the rest. You don't doubt that he's made an impeccable soldier, back in your own prime he'd likely have been able to take you down with minimal struggle, if size was something to go off of.

The fatigue was already starting to enter your legs, your brain fighting hard to not give into any brain fog. You could only hope you wouldn't catch a cold from the drastic change in environment. Price shouts out something you don't quite hear, but you know what he wanted to say. You're finally here.

It looks a lot bigger when you're this close. A one story that makes itself look better than it is by raising its roof higher, giving the illusion of more space when none of it is utilized. Soap and Gaz are getting agitated the more Price struggles with the keys.

Simon comes to a stop a few steps behind you. He's always back there, trekking behind everyone else. You'd be lying if you said it didn't make you a little antsy. Price utters a loud curse you haven't heard before when he finally gets the door to budge open.

The five of you seem to have pretty much the same idea of immediately throwing the heavy bags in a big pile on the floor. The fire is already going. Whoever you were renting this from atleast knew a little about hospitality.

"Finally," Gaz groans, stretching out his arms till they give off a nasty pop, going to do the same with his neck.

Soap is the first to go on a little exploration adventure through the living room you stepped into, the open kitchen at the end, and the smaller hallway connected to them both. You had been right, not as big as mistakenly advertised.

"Aye...no food though, going to have to do some shopping asap!" Soap shouts from the kitchen followed by a louder bang, likely having been the fridge door.

You internally thank yourself for packing an extra lunch you could eat as breakfast the morning after, should your stomach allow it.

"Really, this the best Laswell could scrounge up?" Gaz says frustratedly, "I saw at least four better options on the way to this isolated thing."

"Be grateful you get a roof over your head sergeant, it'll do" Price responds in a tone no less frustrated. He didn't seem to be any happier with the place than his subordinate. You couldn't really put fault on either of them, it was far from stellar only the necessities to remain inconspicuous.

Simon acquires the keys from Price, promptly doing his own little surveillance to make sure all the doors and windows had proper locks on them, and that they were in fact locked. You weren't the only one skittish about this place.

"Alright round up everyone, for tonight you are ordered to rest. It's been a long day, I know some of you are weary from the flight," he gives you a pointed look that feels almost accusatory. Soap walks back to little circle you had unintentionally formed, dragging Simon with him by his sleeve on his way.

"We don't have a lot of space to deal with so, Garrick and I will be the taking the smaller room at the end of the hall, Ghost, Soap and Spider can share the bigger one, figure out sleeping arrangements amongst yourselves."

"Only two beds, shouldn't be a problem for you two to share" Gaz says in a joking tone, putting a hand on Soap's shoulder that gets almost immediately shaken off. You keep your eyes to the ground. It wasn't any of your business. You fear they take notice.

"You're grown adults, I expect you to be able to figure it out," Price says already laying the ground rules of don't disturb him today. "I will be turning in, I suggest you all do the same, the real work starts tomorrow."

"Yeah yeah" Simon grumbles in a lower voice than normal, putting a firm hand on Soap's back to steer him away from the conversation before it drags out. Wordlessly you follow them down the hall, keeping a greater distance, at least as much as the narrow way would allow.

"Better not be cramped" Soap grumbles turning the handle and using more force than necessary on the door. It was his lucky day. The room was a lot more spacious than you had imagine it to be, it almost makes you feel bad for the captain and the other sergeant that they didn't opt for this one.

Two beds, two dressers, a big mirror on top of one of them and large windows at the end of the room looking onto the snowy mountains. It was better than you'd had in over a year, you had little to complain about.

Mountains. The mountains. The idea strikes you like a quiet zap of electricity. If the cave systems were still accessible it would be a viable place to investigate. If you knew the cult well, and you did, they were likely going to put the old pathways to use again.

Soap says something you don't catch as he walks over and claims one of the beds for him and Simon. You walk and claim the other one by placing your duffel on top of it. It was going to be weird sleeping next to them, or opposite of them. You could only pray that you wouldn't be visibly weird about it

"Ah guess It won't be so bad," Soap let's out a relieved sigh, finally able to dispose of some of the heavier gear and clothes that kept him warm.

"As Price said, it'll do" Simon agrees with a quiet hum and nod of his head.

Soap starts to roam around the room, opening the closet doors, moving the curtains around, stifling his curiosity the practical way. "Well should do, we have enough space, plenty of closet space for each of us, a damn good scenery out the window, can almost excuse it for a small vacation."

"Going to be far from a vacation this," you chuckle quietly, slightly enthused by his own newfound excitement over your living space.

"We should keep the curtains closed; we're exposed like this" Simon ever so practical walks over tugging on the curtains. He leaves it halfway open to let some light in while the sun was still up. It wouldn't be long before it would descend again and cloak the woods in a thick darkness.

"What do ye reckon is in there?" Soap gestures towards the door behind you. He walks a little close as you turn around to inspect it yourself. You hadn't even noticed it when you first claimed your bed. It's awfully close too, perhaps you could move your bed a bit further away from it so it wouldn't bother you if anyone should go in there, or out of there.

"Don't know...more closet space?" it's meant as a joke but turned away from them you can't see their reactions. You place your hand on the handle. It's ice cold. Your eyebrow furrows. The rest of the room had been comfortably warm, not even chilly despite the icy temperatures outside.

You open the door towards you to take a look inside. You feel your blood run cold. Your body freezing in place. Your hand gripping the handle impossibly tighter.

It's a bathroom. Ugly tile floor, small toilet to the right, sink next to it, shower right in front. You could almost have missed the blood from how well it mixes in with the orange tiles. But it's hard to ignore the body.

Her dead eyes are staring you down. Her last accusatory yet sad words are still on her lips unspoken. Her body is still wet from the water, the blood pooling from her arm mixing in with the water on the floor too. Her naked body is still littered with scars from head to toe. Though the cut going from wrist down her forearm hadn't been meant to add to the collection.

It had been final.

Intentional.

You can feel the glint of metal in the corner of your eyes. You don't need to look down to your feet to know that the blade is there. You can feel the blood coating your own arms, tainting the door handle with your sin.

Do you feel it yet? The pressure?

The shadows pool around her, grasping at her skin, pulling at her flesh.

They'll know. They'll dig dig dig. They'll cast you out to the wolves.

You don't know what she wants with you now, what she wanted with you then. You can't remember, your brain a vast empty space, a mere echo of who she was. There's a chill in your bones, something lost and angry, wanting you to know and answer. You still haven't answered it.

You try to remember her name, her significance to you. A misplaced droplet of blood runs down her forehead. The red complimented her complexion well. It had been her favourite colour.

"Hey.....hey....you okay?" his voice is muffled, far away, in a different reality from yours. He's going to reach you eventually, they all are. They'll see it all eventually, they'll figure it out, distrust you for it, abandon you, punish you.

Soap places his hand on your shoulders and your reflexes fire like a gun. You grab his wrist hard, looking at him with an angered look that only lasts a second before you tuck far away. His eyes widen, guilty entering his features as he removes his hand and puts them up in defeat.

"Woaah, sorry didn't mean to scare ye," he starts off in a gentling tone "ye weren't answering, it's just a bathroom, right?"

"Oh fuck...yeah...I zoned out" you excuse it moving a few steps back. The back of your knees hit the edge of the bed. You look back into the bathroom. Orange tile, toilet, sink, shower. She's gone. Soap nods looking in himself, to your luck he seems to let your weird reaction go, yet you can still feel Simon's stare in the back of your neck. You don't turn around to meet it.

You bite your lip, keeping your eyes on the bathroom as if she would appear again. You almost wish that she would, because you know who she is, who she was to you. You've always known, as if you could ever forget it.

Her name had been Emma, and she was the first to die.

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ywpd-translations · 6 months ago

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Ride 778: “Hakogaku's sprinter”

Pag 1

1: Izumida-san!!

2: I'll use it

“Hurakan”!!

Pag 4

1: This year's May

2: Ibaraki Prefecture

West Tsukuba

3: Tsukushiba University, located at the foot of the sacred eastern mountain, Mount Tsukuba, at 887m above the sea level

4: In front of the second dormitory building on the campus

5: Basically, Doubashi

You mean you want to race me in a serious sprint battle...

Pag 5

1: Yes, please

This might be a weird way to say it, but

2: In Hakone Academy... among our team, there's no one who can be my opponent!!

3: Alright, then I'll gladly accept!!

4: I, Izumida Touichirou of Tsukushiba University racing club!!

First year at Tsukushiba University, department of science and engineering, former Hakone Academy captain

Pag 6

1: Former Hakone Academy ace sprinter

2: The area around the university is a town, but if you go out of it it's really easy to ride, Izumida-san

3: There's both flats and mountains, it's a good place for biking

4: Did it take long to come to Ibaraki?

5: Coming here from Kanagawa, you have to cross Tokyo, so... yeah

Honestly, I had to change so many trains...!!

Pag 7

1: Is Manami doing alright?

Yeah, he's so carefree, but sometimes he says something serious too!!... I guess?

Sounds like Manami

2: Ngh....!!

3: Dammit.... this is so fun!!

What's this!! We're just riding our bikes and talking, but I've missed this feeling!!

4: When I was a second year and Izumida-san was a third years, we practiced like this every day!!

5: Sometimes Izumida-san was the one who attacked, sometimes it was me, and we pushed each other to our limits

7: It's not the time to smile about this!! I've come here to become stronger!!

Pag 8

1: Sorry, Izumida-san!!

I got too relaxed for a moment!!

3: It's good to relax

That's important, too

5: There's as many roads to ride as we want!!

So, which one is better? You can choose

For today's menu!!

6: An easy course with a 100km run along the roads of Ibaraki and a sprint at the end

Pag 9

1: Or the hard course, cut into section, with a final sprint when we're giving our all!!

4: Of course!! The hard one!!

6: Since it's you

Pag 10

1: I knew it would come to this!!

Abs, read?

2: Go!!

Pag 11

1: Abs, abs, abs, abs, abs!!

Buoooorah!!

Pag 12

1: Buah!!

2: Doubashi!!

You've really gotten stronger!!

3: If it were you from last year, you wouldn't have been able of getting ahead on a short climb like that before!!

4: Izumida-san, you're the one who has powered up!!

I seriously think I'm gonna be torn apart right now!!

5: But this is what I wanted

Pag 13

1: An opponent to race against in a fierce and close battle!!

During that you become stronger, and move to the next stage!!

2: Abs, Doubashi!!

Rise!! With that body!!

3: More....

4: Give me more, Izumida-san!!

6: Alright, I'll show you a sprint that will make you regret those words!!

Pag 14

1: Abs!!

Come!! Masakiyo!!

2: Buooorah!!

Izumida-saaan!!

4: Today was fun

Pag 15

1: Thank you

Well, I'm beat, Izumida-san

2: In the end, I lost at the final sprint

You rode well, you drove me in a corner until then!!

3: Did you see it? Your next stage

Yeah... well, little by little, but...

4: But I'm just a little closer, I feel like I can grasp something, but I can't

5: That's because you're too serious

6: And you're an hardworker

7: You know, there are two types of “right”

Huh

Pag 16

1: There's what's socially right

And what's right for yourself

3: Rules and norms, things that must be observed when living together, are what's socially right

The other

4: are the feelings in your heart you won't give up

6: Actually, both of these are “right”

Pag 17

1: But, sometimes these two go into conflict

2: Feelings....!!

“Feelings are strength”.... Izumida-san said that before

3: When something wrong happens, you end up resorting to violence, you reflexively curse at people

However, what should be restrained is the “action”

4: Not the feelings themselves

5: If you don't like something, you can get angry

6: No but, Izumida-san, if I just blindly do that.....

7: And when you're happy

Pag 18

1: you can honestly smile

2: I got too relaxed for a moment!!

4: There's no need to deny it

Those obvious “feelings” that are boiling inside you!! You can smile because you've missed something

5: The feelings that came out amidst of your own study and research and suffering

Where is the mistakes in that?

6: Even if you took a detour, there's no lie in your hard work!!

8: Release yourself more

Lead the path of your own heart

Pag 19

1: Polish what's right for you!!

2: What's “right”.... for me....!!

3: I understood it riding together with you today

You're already good enough for the next stage

You

Pag 20

1: will become much stronger!!

Buoooo!! Smash through!! “Hurakan”!!

#yowamushi pedal #yowapeda #yowamushi pedal translations #yowapeda manga #yowamushi pedal spoilers #yowamushi pedal manga #ride 778 #starting my doubashi fanclub who wants to join?#I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HOW IS HE SUCH A BRUTE BUT ALSO SO FREAKING CUTE AND PRECIOUS WHAT THE HELL #hes rising up my chart of fave characters with every new chapter #fave sprinter in hakogaku thats for sure #(sorry shinkai lmao)#also im not the biggest izumida fan but he is right and doubashi should let himself go #loved how he literally said 'arent you tired of being nice? dont you just wanna go apeshit?' to doubashi lmao #and doubshi be like 'last time i did that i beat up a guy i dont think thats such a good idea'#hes such a good guy he learned from his mistakes and now hes allowed to let himself go a little :)#also why was he so cute when he was smiling at izumida all happy to be there with him #CUTE #not a word i ever imagined id associate with doubashi #but here we are!#also his hair are getting better every chapter hes gonna be in a shampoo commercial soon

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skarsbabe · 8 months ago

Text

Sol y Luna; a captain's order.

Bill skarsgård x reader!au

Summary; A rejected soldier and his love-hating woman of a surgeon meets again in a different circumstance—hoping to forget about one another what will happen if old flames reignite in amidst of sworn duties and personal feelings?

TW. Implied violence, cursing. (talk of gùns, blàdes, etc.) Read at your own discretion.

a/n: inspired by descendant's of the sun series because i'm in love with it (and bill). I also might've changed a few details in this, and gave them their own background stories & characters.

word count; 2.6k

ATTENTION: I do not consent my work to be copied, posted, or plagiarized in anyway. This is an ongoing series let me know if you liked it!!

"It's the demilitarized zone, so we'll resolve this in dialogue." Bill says casually as him and Wolf take their gears off. See this was a normal thursday for the big boss, atleast that's he thinks. Wolf looks at his friend with a blank face and eyes for hunger, maybe what hid behind his eyes has a double entendre since their meal was cut short by these troublemaking bastards.

The rest of the alpha team stood alert as they watch their captain and comrade approach the ruined building where two hostages are captured in. Two hands raised in a surrending manner bill spoke, "This is the operation commander, is the two hostages okay?," fuck they are really making it hard for them, he thinks.

"Let's stop this now, we'll send you home." he shouts from the outside making the hostage-taker scoff in response. "Looks like they won't go quietly," wolf whispers next to him, yeah man that's what I've been thinking, wanna hit this old style? He wants to say. "Let's go in." Bill smiles and nods before he clicks on his earpiece

"Big boss transmitting, I'm going in with wolf." Big bad soldier with a head full of ego.

"Piccolo transmitting, position secured." The two held up their hands together still, feigning in surrender in exchange for the two imprisoned victims.

"Snoopy transmitting, explosives in place." This all suddenly took all of the remaining special forces team's attention, especially harry potter. "We're using explosives?" snoopy glared at him "it's only a last resort in case the negotiation fails." The team gave their sighs of defeat and tight-lipped resignation while hoping for the best of not having any casualties for the day. Perhaps they still remember the earful they've received from the general.

"Stop this now while we still let you, it'll only get worse in the morning." Wolf's impending patience gets shorter each second these kidnappers waste.

Suddenly the doors busted open in place as the criminal's lunges at the two like dying hyenas out of the cage, all of them are armed with different blades. Classic move.

They all fought them off with ease until the the leader of the gang meet's bill's eyes. A familiar one he thought. Half of his face was being covered by the black balaclava but he knew that look all so well. One that thought him how to kill, and how to be killed, one they thought was gone, has reincarnated himself in front of him, meeting death itself.

Before he knew it a blade slashed itself into his side, waking his brain from his old dilemna of memories from the past, "sierra."

"I'm glad you recognized me, comrade." He laughs darkly as his eyes hold no remorse. "But i'm afraid I can't let a special forces man, let run free after this incident." He says before he swiftly runs his blade to his face once again, they fought time and time again before bill's blade reaches sierra's neck.

"you won't be able to kill me, we both know that a man of the country he serves cannot kill." The nerve of this man really.

"But we, the republic, are different." He smiles before bill feels the coldness of the barrel behind his head. Wolf turns to his side as he hears the sound of a glocking gun, seeing his comrade calm as he is while being in the line of meeting God.

"Seventy years since the division and yet we still have misunderstandings." Bill scoffs, before he looks at the man dead in the eyes. "If it is to protect the peace, we will shoot precisely, wherever, whenever."

sierra looks to his side to see a red dot following suit, pointing precisely on his forehead. "Let's not make any mistakes like this again. I don't interfere when an enemy makes a mistake."

"I can't come as a warrior and leave as a casualty." Sierra says as he orders his men to put the gun down. "Nice to meet you again, Captain Skargård."

"Likewise, but let's not make it an annual event, lieutenant Santos." sierra yields his weapon to the ground and orders his men to go follow him. "Big Boss transmitting, alpha team has resolved the situation."

"you must've felt proud, huh." Wolf whistles in his direction, smirking. "big bad cop."

"DID YOU SHOOT WITH YOUR EYES CLOSED? your score.."

"This barrel looks a little twisted, doesn't it?" Wolf complains in response while inspecting the toy gun in hand. "It doesn't shoot very well," while the two expresses their annoyance to the toy gun forcing and banging it in different ways the owner of the store yell's in caution "hey! Be careful with that!" He says before he snatches it from wolf's hands, "mister, your gun doesn't work." Bill snickers in response laughing in his friend's unimpressed face.

"That is because you aren't real soldiers, people in iraq uses this exact model and they work just fine," he yaps in annoyance. "This isn't the same model—"

"THIEF! THIEF! CATCH THAT THIEF!"

The sargeant sighs in place. As their attention caught on the commotion happening, "Let us borrow this for a bit." Before he snatches it away from the owner's hands, "but we're on our break, man." Bill complains before following his friend.

"It's a toy gun so we have a short range, about five meters." wolf says while they stand their ground aiming the gun at the alleged thief running on a motorcyle. "Ten meters,"

"Guys that's dangerous, move! move! You hey!" The thief screams, before the two clocks their toy gun in place. "Shoot." Baby bullets shoots through the teenagers eyes aiming it perfectly making him fall off and slide onto the fruit stand on the corner.

"Did you call the police?" Wolf asks the motorcyle owner, before he hears it's engine roar, "The motorcyle is fine, calling the police over for a coupon thrief is more bother than what it's worth. Besides his injury has nothing to do with me. Okay? Thank you." The man spoke hurriedly before he rode away. Wolf sighs in defeat before he saunters back with friend who seems to be writing something down on the thief's forearm.

"You little punk one wrong move and you could be stuck with lifelong spinal injury. Don't move." He says before he flicks the thief's forehead back to lie down.

"What are you doing now?"

"Providing first aid after an act of social injustice." He says before pulling the string from his pants, smiling mischeviously, "let me buy those two teddy bears there,"

"Ah, Those aren't for sale," the owner buts in again before he was glared by the two men in response. "Sell them to me, or I'll win them all."

The man runs back with more stuff toy than they needed.

"I think she is the one." Wolf says before patting the head of his date, a white bunny plush bear. "yours is pretty cute." wolf teases as he sees his friend choke on his drink. "This? We're just friends," he responded with unfazed sarcasm, "is that so? Rejected you, again? That's why your friends?" wolf teases more before bill's phone rang, "oh you wanna play dirty. Oh look who's calling, what a coincidence." bill smiles in victory.

"What is that the unit? Are they gonna cut our lunch short, again?"

"Not our unit, but yours." Bill laughs as he flips the phone in wolf's direction, seeing the caller id as her name, In big bright bold letters.

Lieutenant. Vann-Reid

"Don't you dare answer that." Wolf hisses as his friend, who's still having his fun by pretending to swipe his finger onto the answer button. "I'll treat you steak." He tries to plead again, only to be met with more boisterous laughter coming from him, "Steak? I sure make enough money to eat that everyday, is that your best negotiation yet?" Bill simply taunts, he really is The big boss, wolf thinks, the big boss of ego and flattery.

"I have a cousin who's a flight attendant that I can set you up a date with now, decline that call." Now he really must've hit the jackpot as bill's eyes glints in delight.

"And you've been hiding that desirable family member from me? How dare you." Bill gasps in fake offence while clutching his chest. "C'mon stop with the dramatics, do you want it or not?" He glares at his friend again, "I didn't say anything did I? Give me your phone, c'mon I have to see this flight attendant cousin of yours,"

"I think it got stolen."

"What?"

fuck, it was must've been taken by the boy thief from earlier. "What hospital did they say they we're taking him?"

"Bed eight motorcyle accident, minor lacerations on his forehead and legs, right ankle suspected to be sprained."

Emma says as she reads his chart. "Mister if you don't mind me asking what happend to your forehead?" pointing to his, seeing marble shaped circles. "Oh wait, you also dropped this earlier from your jacket sir, it's been ringing nonstop." Emma smiles as she hands the patient his phone. "Oh no, no you hold onto it first, I'll just go at the comfort room."

Oh. he'll be back, she thought. Well, that was 20 minutes ago, too long for a bathroom break from a patient who's not suffering from any stomach problems whatsoever. Emma had been running around like a lunatic mother finding for her child before she stumbles and sees you doing your rounds.

"Doc. y/n thank god you're here. The patient in bed five, I-I think he might've ran away," she babbled, while panting from running too much. Seriously, how many patients do they lose in an average day? "Look he has this teddy bears wrapped around his head, and well, he's limp."

Behind her, there exactly stood a man in his early 20's in skinny jeans, with head covered by two plush teddy's, pink and blue. Limping his way out of the exit.

What a day to be an ER doctor, you think to yourself.

"Yeah, yeah, excuse me," the man says hastily before he limply took off, taking one step and a time. You both ran towards him. "Okay sir, this has been fun and all but we seriously have to treat you."

"I'm fine, why don't you believe me, look I can walk okay? just let me go." This man was really trying to be everything but convincing, "Sir if we don't treat that leg of yours, it could to more damage than it is, so listen to me and lie down," you sternly spoke, before assisting him to his bed.

"You don't get it if I don't get out of here, my boss will put me straight in the morgue."

Morgue?

"well are you part of a gang?" You asked without hesitation, Looking at his eyes directly. "W-What, no." the fear in his eyes doubled in sized when he realizes he's been caught. Well he may be part of a gang somehow, but he didn't expect this doctor to ask such direct ones as bait.

"Well this is a hospital. Tell that boss of yours that if he ever comes here, we'll call the security right away to have him thrown in jail, got it?" You assure him, "who wrote this?" seeing a note written in a black marker inlcuding his chart.

Boy thief, must be treated in the most painful way possible.

The boy sighed again, "ah well that has been there when the paramedics brought him in—" emma replied shortly before she was interrupted by the boy, groaning in pain. "It's the punks who shot me." You and emma laughed in amusement, "shot you? with what baby bullets?" Yes dammit, with baby bullets, a toy gun brought him to this condition.

"Well whoever did this is sure an expert in the field, look at these plush teddy's very fitting for a first aid." You mock him playfully as you order emma to get his x-ray checked, "I'll be back for you, nurse emma, call me if he ever tries to escape, again." As you walk away emma hands you a phone, "what is this?" You asked in curiousity, "well that patient in bed eight told me to onto it, but it wouldn't stop ringing so I didn't know what to do."

huh. Why wouldn't a phone owner answer his own phone?

You nodded towards her as you take the phone to see it still ringing, the caller id listing as Big Boss. Oh he really is part of a gang, and a lame one at that. You thought. "Hello?"

Bill sighs in annoyance as he grew tired of running in circles again and again through the white hospital halls, the dim lighting and people swarming around waiting to get treated, makes it harder for bill to retrieve the phone before he hears it ring for the last time and hears a response. "Hello?"

Angel. That's what bill heard, a savior in his time of need. "Hello is this the patient's guardian?," the woman, angel spoke again. bill loses his terrain of thought as he hears it being too close by? He opens one of the curtains behind him as he peaked to see a white wearing coat doctor suturing a patient in hand while holding, wolf's phone.

"well, yeah hello," bill then spoke from where he stood, puffing out his chest, smirking as he observed the doctor in front of him. You turn behind you as you hear an unfamiliar voice before catching up to what's happening, "I'll be back sir," you say before standing up to remove your glove and gauzes in place. Your hair struck in different places but you had never been more heavenly to bill's eyes. "Sir hello, are you the guardian or the patient's gang boss?" what.

"No, what?" bill retracts his statement from earlier, an angel isn't this fierce to make him sweat too much, no, he's part of a super elite team for fucks sake, why is he nervous about this woman questioning him. Pull yourself together.

"Well you answered the phone, does that mean your big boss?," you asked while showing him the caller id in the phone. "Well yeah, technically I am, doc. But hey listen—" you nod in petty aknowledgement before deciding to call the cops number in the keypad. "Hello yes? This is Doctor y/l/n, from Rutherford hospital I'm calling for a—hey what," before you knew it the phone was swiped away from your ear, flying before bill catches it with ease. "Listen, Doctora, y/l/n or whatever, my job is very confidential and I would get in risk if we involve the cops, just give me the phone and we'll leave," bill now smiled, hoping his charm would work on the doctor.

"Why would your job be in risk? So your admitting to be that patient's boss who'll put him in the morgue?" You narrow your eyes at him, before you get your name called by emma again.

"Doc! He espcaped again! Oh no I lost him," emma sprints towards her. seriously? "I would like to continue this Big boss, but I'm afraid I'll have to cut our meeting short by duty calls, excuse me." You ran towards emma as your coat rushes by the wind, meeting her halfway before ordering to call the security for assistance. Meanwhile bill thought he had fallen in love in the most accidental way, in a hospital.

What are the odds of meeting his future wife and savior of an angel on an average break?

_ _

a/n: that was the first chapter, let me know if this was badly written or not, it's my first time writing TvT

#bill skargard x reader #bill skarsgard #bill skarsgard imagine #bill skarsgard fanfiction #bill skargard #marquis de gramont #john wick #marquis vincent de gramont #roman godfrey #roman godfrey x reader #bill skarsgard smut

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scuorge101 · 22 days ago

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My job at this point is to be a Polites and Eurylochus defender because y’all will rationalize everything Odysseus does but refuse to see things through Polites or Eurylochus’ eyes.

While all of them are not innocent people because they just came from the Trojan War and are soldiers, y’all still refuse to see things Polites and Eurylochus’ way.

With Polites, Open Arms could have been a way to cope for him as much as it was to try and cheer Odysseus up. While you could say Polites is naive, I don’t see it that way. Polites has fought and has probably killed but in the song he says “aren’t you tired of the war and bloodshed?” Meaning he most likely has guilt of the things he’s done and wants to do better. Wants to be kinder, he thinks the world would be better if we stopped resorting to violence and instead talked things out or go about it a different way.

Y’all also seem to forget that he helps fight the cyclops, meaning that if his philosophy doesn’t work then he is ready to fight if he has to.

With Eurylochus, he is the second in command. He is the voice of the crew. I don’t think he opened that bag out of greed but more so out of distrust (and also a lot of people most likely wouldn’t stop bugging him about it). Because from the start he has shown to have some trust issues with Odysseus (known lier). And while he does bring up hunger a lot, I still think opening that bag was more so out of distrust than for treasure.

We can tell he has guilt over this. For he did accidentally just cause the death of a lot of them. We see that he keeps trying to apologize but Odysseus keeps talking over him.

With the men on Circe’s island debate I can see things in his perspective. He just lost these men to a powerful witch/goddess, anyone would be scared to face her if they don’t have the resources to deal with it, and it wasn’t the entire fleet it was just a few people Odysseus sent with him. And we know Circe is hard to beat because Hermes literally had to give Odysseus a magical plant in order to put them on the same footing. We see with Circe and in the animatic that she was about to kill him before Odysseus let down his guard. Eurylochus had a right to be fearful. Here Odysseus reassures Eurylochus that as their captain he will always come to aid them.

But, this new trust is broken once again when Odysseus sacrifices six men. This rightly sets Eurylochus off because their captain who fought to get them back just willingly sacrificed six of them and they didn’t even know what was about to happen. And so the mutiny begins.

When on the island I can understand Eurylochus because being lost at sea for years mixed with hunger is not a good thing. It makes you lose yourself and your need to eat something, anything, takes over. It didn’t matter in that moment if the cows were sacred, they were starving.

The thing with Eurylochus and Odysseus is that trust goes both ways. You can’t just tell someone to shut up and follow your orders without there being some serious backlash and we know and have seen that we can’t always count on Odysseus’ actions to save them (because his apology to Poseidon doesn’t work and he revealed his name to the cyclops).

#this rant is going nowhere but I hope y’all see my vision #I need to stop ranting so much I’m an art blog tf #epic polites #polites epic the musical #eurylochus epic the muscial #eurylochus epic #odysseus epic the musical

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m4rdb · 1 year ago

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An insight into the characters based on their approach to the “Allie problem”

If good writing means that every scene has the potential to say something about a character at their core, then the girls' attitude towards the "Allie problem" is an interesting example.

Taissa

The one who comes up with the very plan. This establishes her as ambitious and extremely rational, but it’s the type of rationality that without grounded moral principles could degenerate into violence and cruelty at any time. It’s what we see with adult Misty and Walter, who are both so practical-minded that resorting to murder is nothing more than a smart option to choose to them.

Like Jackie says, Taissa has so much fight in her. The way she handles the Allie situation shows that if she has a goal, she’ll do whatever she finds necessary to obtain it.

How does that translate into their time in the wilderness?

Taissa’s the first to make the call that they should leave the plane and find water. She’s the one who sleeps in the attic when everyone else wouldn’t, she’s the only one who tries to tell Jackie she shouldn’t leave. And in season two, she’s the one who says, “We need to find a way to stay alive, and it can’t be her [: Lottie]”.

Then we see them drawing cards. We’re not shown how they get to that very decision exactly, but it’s important that we know that the two things are tied. The hunt that follows, their first conscious hunt (let’s not forget about Travis), wasn’t supposed to happen—it’s rather the consequence of the designed sacrifice refusing to take on the role.

Though there’s an obvious religious aspect to it, drawing cards isn’t just letting fate/the wilderness decide in their place so that they don’t blame themselves. It’s also the girls’ attempt to give the ritual some semblance of logic and structure—on a normal day, they would draw cards to decide who gets which task. They’re using the same mechanism, except that they’re now deciding who should die and get eaten. And it starts with Taissa’s very rational and straightforward remark about needing to survive.

Natalie

She openly and passionately goes against Taissa’s plan. Despite being presented as the outsider who doesn’t really engage with the team and disregards rules by smoking and doing drugs, she’s the one who fights to play fairly. She most likely doesn’t care about Allie personally, but she’s a teammate, and they should treat her as such.

While Tai’s ultimate goal is winning at Nationals, Natalie doesn’t want to win more than she wants to be a team (T: What’s your plan, then? / N: I dunno, play like a fucking team and win? It’s worked so far.).

It’s quite ironic—yet not that surprising—how, despite being opposites, Natalie and Jackie share a similar mindset about this.

The scene establishes Natalie as a sympathetic character with grounded and noble moral principles, no matter the adversities. In the wilderness, she’s the first and possibly the only one who acknowledges Travis’ grief and sees through his unsufferable attitude and understands that, as much as questionable his methods are, he’s trying to make sure Javi gets over their father’s death and wants to live on.

It's also meaningful that Natalie’s not there when Jackie and Shauna fight and Jackie ends up leaving the cabin. The night earlier, Natalie was the one who let her out when Lottie and the others locked her in and went to hunt Travis down. Natalie basically saves the girl who just had sex with Travis being perfectly aware that it would hurt her, and she doesn’t even know. Viewers do know, though, and we’re instinctively led to think of her as even more noble and deserving of empathy.

Jackie’s death certainly comes from an irrational choice, but the deepest reason is the others’ lack of sympathy towards her at the end of the season. It could be delusional, but I can’t see Natalie turning a blind eye on the whole thing, had she been there.

Jackie was their captain when they had a normal life. Natalie becomes their leader thanks to the constant effort she’s put into the group ever since they landed there—and possibly, as the matter with Allie shows, even before that.

Lottie

Lottie’s phrasing for her refusal is telling. She says, “It doesn’t feel right.” It’s not that she thinks it is, or that it seems like it is. She feels like they’re not meant to go through with it. A simple yet fitting choice of words foreshadows Lottie’s spiritual nature and her connection to the wilderness as well as her role of prophet/messiah.

It’s also important that she’s not shown as particularly proactive. She does express her opinion, but she’s not as passionate as Natalie about it, who instead actively tries to convince them what a terrible idea it is and interferes with Taissa’s plan on the field. This shows how Lottie never cared be a leader, but rather follows where her feelings lead her.

Van

We’re not really shown Van’s reaction until they’re in the locker room after the scrimmage. We just learn that she’s impressionable, as she almost throws up at Nat’s mention of Allie’s bone being visible, and that she’s so devoted to Tai that she won’t let Shauna talk shit about her at the party.

Laura Lee

Of course, nobody would even dream of telling Laura Lee about an act of such misconduct. She would never go along with Taissa’s plan, she wouldn’t even fathom doing something like this. She’s more clueless than Jackie, because Jackie at least did notice something was off on the field. Even at the party, Laura Lee is the only one who still has no idea there were such tensions.

Her blissful ignorance keeps her kind and pure, apart from the ruthless tendencies of the team. It doesn’t change once they’re in the wilderness—Laura Lee dies trying to help her friends, and she fortunately never gets to witness their worst moments.

Shauna

Unsurprisingly, Shauna’s a tough one. Her attitude towards the Allie situation is as ambivalent as it will be for the rest of the story towards everything else.

Shauna keeps her thoughts for herself until Nat and Lottie leave and it’s just her and Tai, and even then, the first thing she says is, “Jackie’s not gonna like it.” The moment she’s asked to make a personal decision, she talks about what Jackie would think, and it’s not because she herself doesn’t know what to think, it’s just what she chooses to say outright. If anything, Shauna isn’t against Taissa’s plan entirely, and bringing up Jackie rather sounds like an excuse so that she doesn’t dwell on her own dark thoughts.

When Taissa says, “Then we probably shouldn’t tell her,” we expect that to upset Shauna—she wouldn’t keep things from Jackie, right? They’re best friends. While it does upset her, it still doesn’t stop her. We understand why later in the episode, when we discover that she’s no stranger to keeping secrets from Jackie, between her affair with Jeff and the admission letter to Brown (it also recontextualizes their first scene together in Shauna’s car, where Jackie addressed literally both).

On the field, when Taissa plays aggressive and forces Allie to play under pressure, Shauna tells her, “It’s not helping,” and once Allie’s on the ground, she’s one of the girls who runs to her first and tries to comfort her. Even though she didn’t openly disagree with Taissa’s plan, she didn’t want or expect things to escalate the way they did. She’ll make the same mistake when Jackie leaves the cabin, Taissa tells her to go talk to her, and Shauna just goes to sleep, underestimating the consequences of it.

Her ambivalence—if not hypocrisy—is shown later that night at the party, when she tries to pick a fight with Taissa while drunk. I think some part of her felt guilty to an extent, so she tries to fight with Tai out of remorse and because she wants to make her look like the only culprit, since she hates that she was so close to being complicit in it. Who calls her out when she defends Nat from Taissa’s slut-shaming at the party? Natalie herself slams in Shauna’s face that she is complicit.

If Shauna had told Jackie, she would’ve put a stop to it for sure. In the 2019 script for the pilot, Jackie says, “You should have told me about Taissa and Allie.” Shauna’s choice to keep the secret directly anticipates their falling out towards the end of the season. Shauna’s continuous lying drives Jackie mad until she explodes and they have that fatal fight.

Shauna’s the one who tries to act as a person who has it together but really doesn’t. She has the potential to be a good person, friend and mother, but she ends up flunking everything and she barely understands why.

Finally, she tells Tai that she’s “a fucking sociopath”, which, considering everything that happens later in the series, is sort of rich.

Jackie

Like Laura Lee, Jackie has no clue the whole “freeze Allie out” strategy is even happening. Shauna didn’t tell her, she was left out, and she doesn’t find out until Allie’s already hurt and there’s nothing she can do about it.

She watches the others as they rush to help and comfort her and handle the situation, but she doesn’t partake in it because she’s too shocked to move. After the scrimmage, she tries very hard to do as Coach Martinez told her—as captain, she’s meant to glue them together (“When it gets tough out there, these girls are going to be looking for someone to guide them. Can you handle that?”). It’s more than that, though—the way Coach put it, if Jackie can’t do that, then she isn’t really anything special. She’s not as fast as Shauna and her footwork isn’t as good as Lottie’s, and there’s something else that Taissa’s better at, too, though Jackie stops Coach before he can tell her that bit. But nobody seems to care about what she’s saying, and Natalie storms off.

Jackie’s inability to handle the Allie situation and lift the others’ spirits foreshadows her incompetence as well as her progressive loss of influence in the wilderness—in Lottie’s words, “You don’t matter anymore.”

Allie’s accident marks the beginning of Jackie’s downfall even before the plane crashes.

#yellowjackets #shauna shipman #taissa turner #natalie scatorccio #lottie matthews #jackie taylor #yellowjackets character analysis #allie stevens #jackieshauna #jackienat #taivan #can you tell who my favorite is #and why is it the one i diss the most in this #yes im talking about shauna #my meta

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sky-fire-forever · 1 year ago

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Being a Our Flag Means Death fan whose favorite characters are Izzy AND Ed is wild. Because I'll be in the Izzy Hands tag and I'll see posts about how horrible Ed is and how you shouldn't like him and how his arc sucked and actually he's terrible and unforgivable

And then I'll be in the Edward Teach tag and I'll see posts about how Izzy is the real villain and how him dying is so good for his arc and Ed is finally free of him

I genuinely think people who try to make either Izzy or Ed into the perfect victims who never did anything wrong are kinda... boring? I dunno. Imo pretending that either of them are completely innocent is a disservice to their characters. But so is acting like either of them are terrible, unforgivable people

Ed abused Izzy. He was nasty to him and incredibly physically violent towards him as a routine. He abused not only Izzy, but the entire crew. He was beyond cruel. He struggles with understanding the severity of his own actions and disassociates to deal with his more horrific crimes. He drives Izzy to a suicide attempt after abusing him directly and mutilating him repeatedly. He gives a non-apology and is grumpy when the people he tortured don't automatically forgive him

Ed is also a survivor of his own abuse, both from his father and Hornigold. He's someone who desperately wants to be a better person, but doesn't understand how. He's someone who loves people a lot, but who also genuinely doesn't understand what love IS. He doesn't understand romance or gentleness or how to exist in a world without violence. But he tries really hard to become something that doesn't come naturally to him. He tries to learn how to become a good person and gets frustrated when he makes mistakes

Ed constantly relapses into abusive tendencies or doesn't realize that his behavior is wrong. But he very genuinely TRIES. He's someone who clearly struggles with empathy, with understanding that what's fun for him is traumatizing to others. He struggles with understanding that just because he's ready to move on, that doesn't mean everyone else has to

I don't think that's a flaw in his writing! I think that's a character flaw and it's actually something about Ed that really, really interests me!

(I do think there's some issue in the way the narrative presents it, with the crew going along with Ed's non-apology and then Lucius being shamed for still being traumatized, but that's not the point of this particular post)

And then with Izzy

Izzy is a fucking dick. He's a jerk who lashes out against people who aren't part of the group he's deemed worthy of his protection. He views people as either allies or enemies, with very little room for something in between. His allies are only the people in his crew and everyone else can get fucked. He's quite selfish in certain ways and he doesn't care who gets hurt as long as it isn't himself or the people he cares about. He holds himself and others to standards of extremely toxic masculinity. He despises change and resorts to allying with his literal worst enemies just so he can get the guy he likes to be with him again. He's cruel and abusive towards those who are lower than him in rank, constantly making other people feel insecure.

He's also someone who is fiercely loyal, even to his own detriment. He's someone who admits when he's wrong and always tries to fix his own mistakes. When he loses the duel with Stede, he asks Ed to let him stay, but he doesn't actually fight it. He goes peacefully, even if he whines about it. He holds himself accountable to his word and to his bond. He's loyal to Ed as his captain and as his friend/lover. He's loyal to his own crew first and foremost. When he has the British attack The Revenge, it appears as though he saves Ivan and Fang, not just Ed. He expresses disappointment when members of their crew die saving Stede from the Spanish. He protects the Kraken Crew from Ed and even stands up to Ed when he realizes things have gone too far. He's someone who has longed for community, but has only found it recently

Izzy as a character is loyal to a fault. Loyal to Ed to the point where he'll get Stede killed rather than let Ed go soft and betray who he is. And I do genuinely think Izzy thinks Stede dying is the best possible course of action because he's an idiot who is going to get Ed killed because he's a fucking idiot. And Ed being so soft snd not being a pirate is also super dangerous when he's like. The most wanted pirate there is. Izzy is loyal to Ed and to his crew. He's someone who cares too much, but tries to act like he doesn't care at all. He covers up his own insecurity by insulting others and he has a LOT of insecurity

They're both just.... such great characters and I love them both. But neither of them are perfect. They're both so fucked up and that's part of why I love them

#ofmd #our flag means death #izzy hands #edward teach #queue-no steel

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huihuiheart · 6 months ago

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Queen's Conch - Pirate! Ateez - 2 - Behind the SEAnes

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Ateez Masterlist

Queen’s Conch Masterlist

Pairing: Pirate! Ateez x Fem! Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Eventual Smut, Mystery and Thriller if you squint

Summary: The man who had been spending his time with you on the beach was not who he seemed to be. Not that you knew that of course. It simply meant things were not as simple as they appeared to be.

Warnings: Deep sea, spells, magic, violence in future chapters, smut in future chapters, cursing, very minor character death.

Word Count: 1138

Johnny knew he was fucked, more than fucked when you disappeared. Breaking into the breach house, staking out places, all sorts of things, hoping he was wrong. With a sigh he finally accepts the reality of the situation, going back to his home. Locking the doors up tightly and shutting all the blinds. He then pulled out a gold doubloon he had hidden in a drawer, it appeared that it hadn’t aged a day, flipping it into the air. By the time it has landed in his palm, he’s on a pirate ship, centuries in the past.

“Captain! Johnny is back!” Someone shouts from behind him, catching an older man’s attention.

The man is scuffed up from a hard life at sea and many battles. Someone most certainly not to be trifled with. Johnny gulping as he makes his way over to him.

“You have news?” The captain asks, puffing smoke out in Johnny’s face.

“One of your descendants disappeared offshore. A young woman.” Johnny confesses, tensing as the captain grabs his collar harshly, jostling him around.

“You had one job! To keep my descendants in that time, where no one could get to them and you can’t even do that!” The captain yells at him before shoving him onto the deck, “Fucking useless!”

Johnny pales when the captain’s pistol is pointed at him, “Captain Lee, please.”

Johnny is nearly resorting to begging despite knowing that a quick death would be the captain’s only way of showing mercy. He flinches when a gunshot goes off, only it’s followed by a thud and he’s untouched. Looking up wide-eyed as Taeyong stands there his own firearm smoking as he stands over his father’s lifeless body.

“Johnny tell me about this woman who got through, and someone clean up this mess. Captain’s orders.” Taeyong barks out, leading Johnny to the captain’s quarters that he had just ‘acquired’. Johnny followed quickly behind to divulge everything he’d learned about you in the days that you were together.

“Well.. at least we know where they are going. It just means we cannot blow them straight out of the water.” Taeyong sighs and Johnny’s brows furrowed. Not that he wanted you harmed, but they didn’t exactly have a reputation for caring about blood ties… or any kind of connections here. His curiosity led him to ask which had Taeyong laughing humorlessly, “Because if the bloodline ends the curse breaks, and who knows what would end the bloodline? I’m not about to risk it.”

“That does complicate things.” Johnny agrees, “In good news, I gifted her a little something, so once she’s close I’ll know it.”

Taeyong smirks, “Well done Johnny. Keep me updated and change our course. We need to go protect what is ours.”

Johnny nods, rushing out to obey the new captain’s orders. Eager to redeem himself and make a better name with Taeyong. Hoping to avoid more wrath from the Lee dynasty of pirates. Jumping on any task that Taeyong relayed. Including sending messages to the rest of the fleet.

The other ships are moving to join the new captain either en route or at the destination. Taeyong intended to make it even more impossible to steal from him. Already knowing that he couldn’t expect anything to make Hongjoong or his crew back down.

“Johnny we need to make a stop on the way,” Taeyong calls, stomping his way up to the highest area of the deck.

“Aye captain, where to?” Johnny asks, grip tightening on the rudder as he awaits the command.

“Siren’s cove.” Taeyong’s direction makes everyone freeze. Not having any desire to defy the captain’s orders, but also having no desire to get twisted in with sirens. Johnny isn’t about to risk vocalizing that though as he silently follows directions. Everyone breathes a sigh of relief when upon arrival Taeyong says he’ll go to the small inlet alone. The crew watches with bated breath as he lacks any hesitation, rowing himself to the sand and then walking into one of the caves.

As Taeyong walks deeper into the cave any siren who hisses or attempts to lure him is met with a harsh glare. The man soon reached the center of the cave system and bowed his head to the woman on the throne.

“It has been far too long Taeyong.” She says beaming at the man as she gets up to walk towards him.

“I wish my visit were under better circumstances though Mother,” Taeyong responds, basking in the attention his mother is giving to him.

“What’s wrong Taeyong? Did something happen?” His mother inquires, leading him to go sit with her.

“I killed father. He was about to ruin everything, so I killed him. It was too soon though… there's not enough in order.” Taeyong sighs, running a hand through his hair, “There’s another problem too… one of our descendants made it through to Hongjoong. A woman.”

“Oh? A woman? How intriguing.” His mother smirks at the thought, “What do you need from me?”

“Our troops will station with our treasure on the off chance that they break the curse, but if you could throw some more thing in the way to at least buy the fleet more time I would appreciate that.” Taeyong requests and his mother nods.

“That’s no problem son, leave that to me. Also this woman… do not worry too much about her. She might just be the final nail in Hongjoong’s coffin.” His mother assures him, “Just allow me time to think about that and set my eyes on her.”

Taeyong nods, “Thank you, mother. I’ll be sure to do my part in cleaning up this mess too.”

“You will do well my son, I am sure of it. Now go make me proud.” His mother says before dismissing him. Taeyong bowed before taking his leave. Returning back to his ship to continue on toward their final destination, the heart of their treasure.

Something that had been acquired not simply by means of man’s power, but with sirens as well. Getting themselves both a source of food and also a collection of magical vices. As well as precious items, not that things of human value were their concern. They simply had what they did of that for the beauty of it. Taeyong’s mother is the one who welcomed them into this era of power in doing so. An empire she’d now have even more control over now that her son had killed his father. The only potential wrench is you being on Hongjoong’s ship. If you were their descendant though then it meant you had siren blood in you. Something that she knew there was a good chance she could use to destroy the crew of the Eternal. She just needed to know how much of their power-hungry spirit you had inherited.

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penny00dreadful · 3 months ago

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Part 4

[Part 1] [Part 3] [Part 5] [AO3] [Cover Art] [Eddie&Chrissy Art]

“Opinions?” Steve asked, feeling the familiar presence of his own Captain of the Guard at his back. A presence who'd never put his hands unnecessarily and so cruelly on someone just because they shoved someone else.

Hopper might be a gruff and cranky old fart but he wasn't a malicious man.

The ease at which the Stoirmeach Captain resorted to such violence after what could arguably be called a small slight, the nonchalance and hate he had shown towards Eddie, who was supposed to be Chrissy’s closest confidant, her best friend, her advisor, all of which should have given him a level of protection against what had happened… Steve could tell it set Hopper’s teeth on edge.

And Steve figured he wouldn’t be letting that edge go any time soon.

Probably not until they were safe and sound back in their own kingdom.

Even if someone back in Torthúil had shoved Steve in anger or hate, the most they would have received would have been a cuff around the back of the head.

Hell, if Hopper went after anyone who'd ever shoved Steve, Robin, Dustin, Mike and Erica would have had permanent residences in Torthúil’s dungeons.

The very thought sent a shiver through him.

They didn't really use their dungeons.

Unless Steve was to count holding wine and ale and cheese captive.

Which he didn't.

Because he and Robin had pilfered freely of the first two in his youth which then led to a pilfering of the third with Argyle, the herbalist and Jonathan, the apprentice painter.

“That Sullivan fella’s got one hell of a stick up his ass.” Hopper grumbled back as Steve took count again of all of the gifts they had brought from home to present to Stoirmeach’s court. “And that Munson character is not very popular.”

Robin snorted humorlessly from her position inside the wagon. “Yeah, no shit.”

Hopper just continued to scowl. “Apparently the princess has never demanded anything as ferociously as she had demanded that Eddie be allowed to stay in the kingdom as her advisor. It was a very unpopular move but she refused to budge on it. Some think he seduced or blackmailed her into it. Others rather… uncharitably think she’s keeping him around as a… a bedmate.”

Despite the sheer ridiculousness of the statement, Steve couldn’t help but glance over his shoulder at Hopper, watching him turn his red face away, trying to keep his words as respectable as possible.

“Did you find anything out about why they were so aggressive? Had he done something else to piss them off?” Steve asked. “And what did they call him? Outsider? Tree dweller?”

“What the hell even is a tree dweller?” Robin muttered back.

“Someone who dwells in trees?” Steve shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“Doesn’t sound so bad.”

“Sinclair was talking to a few of the grunts on Stoirmeach’s side and according to them he’s just an all around troublemaker.” Hopper had his arms crossed and a scowl on his face. “Just does things to be a nuisance. Which sounds a whole lot like—”

“Bullshit.” Steve pushed in with raised eyebrows.

“You think so?” Robin was attempting to crawl her way out of the covered wagon and Steve offered her a hand down.

Steve shrugged. “All I’ve seen him do so far is look out for Chrissy. He might be going about it in a bit of an unorthodox manner, but his heart seems to be in the right place.” He squeezed his fingers around Robins. “Would you not do the same for me?”

She immediately opened her mouth to deny it, but she stopped, slowly sealing her lips back together with a frown.

“Doesn’t mean I have to like his attitude.” She grumbled after a few moments of silence.

“You don’t, but it also doesn’t mean you’d attack him for it.”

Robin just shrugged. She probably didn’t have many qualms about attacking Eddie but unlike the soldiers, her attacking would have just amounted to hair-pulling and rib-jabbing.

Steve turned back to the inventory in the wagon with a little smirk, silently delighted he’d been able to catch her out.

He wanted to make a good impression. He wanted to make sure their kingdom knew that their princess Chrissy would be well looked after.

But based on what they all just witnessed, he wasn’t so sure anymore whether they’d give a fuck whether Chrissy was taken care of or not, or if they just wanted her married off.

Either way, the gifts were here now and if they helped ingratiate him into the kingdom, maybe he could try to make everyone’s life there easier.

Himself, Robin, Chrissy… even Eddie.

There was apprehension crawling around him, thinking about what might be awaiting them all once they got there.

Was he going to be forced to witness more brutality?

God, he hoped not.

He was only a week out on his journey. He had over a month left. And he already wanted to go home.

He sighed, pulling himself back out of the wagon and leaned himself against it, casting his eyes around.

He hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Chrissy or Eddie since the incident had happened and based on the shouts of laughter and boisterous storytelling coming from the Stoirmeach guard, bragging to his staff, no one else had seen the two either.

Things were still a little tense. Steve’s side of the camp had been shaken by the brutality and were no longer sure about how to act around Chrissy’s side who had taken it all in stride.

But hopefully, with time, things would become easier. And hopefully Steve could prevent an incident like that happening again.

Either way, it was up to him to make things better, to make this marriage work. Being a crown prince certainly had its advantages, but there was an awful lot of responsibility on his shoulders at all times too.

And he did feel responsible for what had happened. He knew Robin would tell him that it wasn’t his fault but still.

Pushing himself back to standing, he took the short few muddy steps towards the tent Eddie and Chrissy had disappeared behind.

Now that he was standing in front of the closed tent flap, he found himself wishing for a closed door instead.

At least with a closed door he could knock.

What was he supposed to do here?

Rolling his shoulders back and holding his head high, Steve attempted to punch out a strong and authoritative clearing of his throat.

Instead what he got was a very awkward clearing of his throat, left shuffling foot to foot as the sounds from inside died down the second he had made his presence known.

The black flap acting as a door was pulled back and Eddie’s expression quickly morphed from waryness to surprise when he saw who it was and then straight down to irritation.

It appeared to just be him. No Chrissy in sight.

“What do you want?”

He was holding the arm that had been grabbed and twisted a little awkwardly at his side, held in close and gingerly, his body angling it away, while the other arm held the tent flap open slightly above him. There was an intoxicating smell gently drifting over the air, something spicy and warm and a little peppery. It was a scent he had never smelled before.

Steve was left kinda just… staring.

It was the first time he’d gotten a good look at Eddie when he wasn’t shrouded in darkness, snapping at him or getting manhandled for the capital offence of looking after his best friend.

He was all darkness and light. Dark brown curls spilling around his shoulders, one half pulled back in a braid tight against the side of his head showing off a delicate curling vine of green leaves inked into his skin, crawling up from under the collar of his leather doublet, stopping just behind his ear. An ear that was pierced through with various silver studs and rings.

His eyes were deep and dark, enormous and even though they were squinted with suspicion, Steve thought he could lose a sizable amount of time staring into them, trying to catalogue every shifting colour.

His skin was so pale, Steve might have thought he was unwell but something about it told him that that was just Eddie. It allowed his curls, his eyes, the ink on his skin and the dusty pink of his lips to stand out even more, sucking Steve’s gaze in, enthralling him.

The dark, almost black colour of his leathers stood out as well and Steve could just about make out some embroidered forest designs along the hems, dark green in colour again and a little shakily applied.

Eddie had his skinny, bony, long fingers adorned with silver rings, there were chains hanging around his neck and from his belts, a small black handkerchief of some kind tucked into the belt around his waist at the back.

Eddie was…

Eddie was kinda really pretty.

Steve felt almost overdressed in his laced hems, brightly coloured embroidery and billowing sleeves. He’d removed his cape and crown for the evening, but even so, he felt like he was posturing.

“Has your mouth ceased to function, Your Highness?”

Steve snapped his eyes back from where they had settled again on those long, skinny fingers, pressed into the fabric of the tent.

Eddie had an eyebrow cocked at him, almost challenging him to bite back, to get offended at the snark or snap in anger.

Steve decided then and there he was going to do everything within his power to assure Eddie that he wasn’t the kind of royalty he seemed to think he was.

“Lord Munson-”

“Well that’s a first.” Eddie snorted, his lip curling in a sneer and he leaned forward a little, trying to punch his next words into Steve as much as possible. “I am untitled.”

Steve blinked.

Well… it wasn’t like he hadn’t heard of such a thing before. True that most people in the household of royalty would be titled themselves or a close relation to the royal member in question. Lucas wouldn’t have had such an easy journey entering into Hopper's service if his father wasn’t a Lord and friends with Hopper. But Torthúil didn’t have such things as a rule.

Robin wasn’t titled either.

“Okay. Mr. Munson-”

Eddie’s eyes had widened slightly but he still opened his mouth and Steve, remembering how he had introduced himself earlier, quickly corrected himself.

“Forgive me. Eddie.” He took a steadying breath in. “I just wanted to come check on you. To see if you were doing okay after…” He waved his hand around, a little awkwardly. “Everything. And I wanted to apologise as well.”

“Ap- apologise?” Eddie’s remaining snark had now melted away to complete bewilderment.

“Yeah. I’m sorry you were subjected to that, I didn’t know your guards would be so…”

“Eager?” Eddie removed his hand from the tent flap, instead leaning his body against the supporting pole. He raised his arms as though he was going to cross them but his mouth tightened when he moved the arm that had been grabbed, so he seemed to just settle on letting that arm hang while he rested the other against his hip.

Steve grimaced to himself. Eager was certainly a word for it.

“Listen, Highness—”

“Steve.”

Eddie’s mouth hung open, frozen from where it had been when he was interrupted and he just stared for a moment.

“Steve.” He said, rolling the sound around on his tongue, seeing if he liked how it tasted.

Steve felt the corner of his lip tilt up, satisfied.

“Steve.” Eddie looked at him with determination. “Don’t get me wrong, I still don’t know whether I like you or not, but you didn’t put your hands on me, did you?”

“Well no but—”

“Then what are you apologising for?”

“I… I’m still sorry that it happened because of me. It shouldn’t have.”

“No, it shouldn’t have.” Eddie agreed, but still raised his good arm to wave Steve off. “But it’s nothing I’m not used to. Don’t worry your pretty little princely head about it.”

“You shouldn’t have to be used to it.”

He was met with an eyeroll and a few muttered words that sounded distinctly like just like Chris.

“Sun’s setting, Stevie. Best get back to your people before they start whispering about me casting spells on you.”

Steve looked over his shoulder to find both sides quickly averting their eyes, doing a very bad job of hiding the fact that everyone was watching their interaction. The only person who continued to look on unashamed was Robin.

When he looked back, Eddie had already dropped the curtain, separating the two of them again and effectively ending their conversation.

Steve was stuck ruminating on the whole interaction for the rest of the evening, into the night as he and Robin got settled into their compartments.

They had originally been roomed separately but that simply would do. They had insisted on it and wouldn’t budge until Robin's bed was brought into Steve’s room.

While their side took it in stride and accepted it as standard because it was standard, Chrissy’s side initially looked appalled, as though Steve had just planted a kiss on Hopper in front of all of them.

But Steve and Robin got their way eventually, while Chrissy looked on, slightly amazed, like she hadn’t even known it was an option.

Steve and Robin pushed their provided luxurious beds closer together so they could gossip at a lower volume, wary of being overheard with nothing but fabric, Hopper and his soldiers standing between them the wilds, and the Stoirmeach retinue.

“Does it strike you as odd that the Stoirmeach side just seems to… ignore Chrissy?” Steve whispered to her. “Or at least they don’t really pay her much mind.”

“It is very strange.” Robin muttered back, tucking her hands up underneath her pillow. “But things are different for women.”

Steve mirrored her position. “Not different enough to ignore their crown princess, surely.”

“No, not that different.”

“What do you think of her?”

Robin sucked her bottom lip into her mouth, chewing on it for a moment before letting it free.

“I’m not really sure. I haven’t seen much of her. Does it sound terrible to say she’s a little like a flower not getting enough sun?”

Steve frowned before shaking his head as much as he could from his position. “We’ll give her all the sunshine she needs back home.”

Robin hummed, hesitating for a moment.

Steve let her, waiting to hear what else she had to say.

“She’s very pretty.”

Steve raised his eyebrows a little. Yeah, Chrissy was pretty. She was tiny with big blue eyes and long flowing blonde hair pulled away from her face with two braids ending with a bow at the back of her head. Her blue gown wasn’t as intricately decorated as Steve’s, Robin’s or even Eddie’s clothes but it fit her well, adding to her delicacy.

Steve was surprised to find himself thinking of Eddie again. When he thought of pretty, he thought of him.

He shoved the thought far out of his head, instead choosing to focus on Robin and how her cheeks were pinking up ever so slightly, bringing out her freckles the way her blush always did.

She was always weak for any pretty girl.

“Hopefully,” Robin sighed, breaking Steve away from his thoughts. “Hopefully what happened with Eddie today is just a one off. The excitement of the whole thing.” It was clear to Steve she was trying to find some kind of positive, but she wasn’t quite buying her own words. “Maybe things will be better once we get to Stoirmeach.”

Steve only nodded.

He had a lot of other hopes aside from never having to see Eddie get treated so brutally again.

Top of his list was that even if he and Chrissy never ended up on the romantic side of love, maybe they could be good partners, good rulers together. Good friends.

It was the best he could hope for, really.

The journey back to Stoirmeach was simultaneously too long a trek and too short.

Steve was desperate to sleep in a real bed again, to be surrounded by actual walls and an actual roof, to stand in front of a fireplace and to be able to wash in more privacy than a tent provided.

But he also felt he was going to miss the mealtimes with Chrissy, more intimate than a standard dining room fair by virtue of them being out in the woods.

As heavily observed as they were and as public all of their conversations were, sitting around a small table with her, only able to squeeze in four chairs maximum—a much a tighter fit than the sprawling and opulent dining tables and banquet tables Steve had to compare to—it reminded Steve of his evenings down in the kitchens with the kids, Claudia and Joyce.

They never ate alone together, Robin was always seated to his right and Eddie was always seated to Chrissy’s right.

Which, of course, meant that Eddie was always next to him too, Chrissy directly across from him and conversation flowed surprisingly easy between the four of them.

They didn’t speak about anything personal, anything private or risky. They steered clear of discussing the incident that had happened when Steve and Robin first arrived, preferring instead to stick to safer topics such as their favourite colours or their favourite time of day.

Nothing so bad as that incident had happened again and Steve wasn’t sure if the Stoirmeach guards just hadn’t been in a foul enough mood to lash out or if they were holding themselves back based on his own less than favourable response to it.

Still, he, Robin, Hopper and surprisingly enough, Lucas kept a very close eye on the guards whenever Eddie was around, just in case Steve needed to step in again and use his status to keep Eddie’s head from being ripped off.

It became clearer as the days went on that the Stoirmeach guards didn’t just dislike Eddie, they hated him.

For what reason, Steve had no idea but when Eddie smiled at Chrissy or reached a hand out to reassure her, Steve couldn’t fathom a single thing Eddie could have done to receive so much ire.

Lucas had taken a bit of a shine to him as well, though as their travels went on, Steve found himself less and less surprised by it.

Eddie had initially been wary of him. Anyone dressed in armour of any kind seemed to have his hackles raised and Steve had been ready to jump in the middle if Eddie so much as looked at Lucas wrong.

But he needn’t have worried.

Once Eddie had come to realise that Lucas was not going to attack out of nowhere and instead was gushing questions about Eddie’s inked skin and how curious his friend back home, Dustin, was to learn about it and how it worked, the door had been opened and Steve didn’t think it would ever close.

Steve was a little worried that Lucas was going to arrive back in Torthúil after the month was over with his skin covered with inked in designs but at the same time, he wasn’t Lady Sinclaire, he wasn’t Captain Hopper. He couldn’t tell Lucas what he could and couldn’t do.

He could just look on disapprovingly with his arms crossed if it came down to it.

Though he didn’t seem to be the only one in the camp with disapproving thoughts on his mind.

Though he had… smoothed over things with Eddie as much as he could where the incident was concerned, Chrissy’s advisor seemed to be a prickly guy.

Steve thought that he’d probably never be considered good enough for Chrissy’s hand in Eddie’s eyes but he couldn’t exactly say he didn’t understand it.

If some foreign royal had come to snatch up Robin into an arranged marriage, he didn’t know if he’d ever be able to find them worthy, even if they were the softest person in existence.

But Eddie seemed to find things to glare at Steve about.

When Steve methodically cleaned mud and dirt from his boots, he got a glare.

When Steve sat with Lucas and Robin, smiling along with them over whatever shenanigans they had decided to reminisce over, Eddie studied him like he was trying to read his mind with a critical eye.

When Steve donned his crown and cape again as the shape of a castle appeared on the horizon far off in the distance, signalling their imminent arrival, Eddie shot him a dirty look.

The guy clearly had some hangups and some preconceived notions that he was refusing to let go of, but Steve didn’t let himself get too bothered by it.

Eddie could think what he wanted about him. He wasn’t going to beg for his approval but also wasn’t going to treat him like shit just because he didn’t bow and scrape at the sight of him.

He actually liked that about Eddie.

Bowing and scraping wasn’t something he was used to.

The royals back in Torthúil just… didn’t engender that kind of higher-than-their-fellow-man type of feeling.

And he liked it that way.

But Steve was left to wonder as the castle loomed ever closer and the town walls rose up to meet it, whether that would be the same here.

He knew the chances were slim.

He wasn’t ignorant to how the rest of the world worked but they weren’t the only kingdom with such a system.

The carriage window was slightly cracked and through the crack he could smell the sea air, hear the sounds of angry crashing waves against the high cliff the castle–his home for the next month–sat on.

There were grey clouds hanging low above and the first smattering of rain against the window glass.

Mingled up in the sea air was the smell of fish and sheep shit, the quick and cutting wind carrying it easily from the beaches down below and the craggy mountain fields.

He reached blindly for Robin’s hand, not taking his eyes away from the window.

She gave his fingers a little squeeze and not for the first time Steve was unimaginably grateful that he had her there with him.

As they passed through the large, slightly rotted wood and metal gate at the entrance to the town, the rain began to fall harder.

Steve had expected to see people going about their business, despite the weather. Things needed to be done, rain or shine after all. But as they bounced down the narrow grey cobblestoned streets towards the looming castle, high up on its cliff, Steve could see… almost nobody.

In fact, the only people he did see were soldiers standing at street entrances and alleyways, clad in dark steel, black and red, watching the caravan pass by silently.

Every so often one of the guards would look behind them, glaring down the alley and Steve had the uncomfortable realisation that they were keeping the townsfolk back there, out of the way of the carriages and wagons and while it did mean that their journey was much quicker, it felt… wrong.

He really, really didn’t like the idea that Stoirmeach’s people were being pushed out of the way for him. Some foreign prince.

Steve tore his eyes away from the window to send a glance Robin’s way and found her doing the same, the two of them sharing a silent what the fuck communication before they turned back to their respective windows.

He would have loved to see Chrissy or Eddie at that point. He would have loved to see how they reacted to all of this, or if they had any reaction at all. Maybe this was all normal to them.

But they weren’t travelling in a carriage like Steve and Robin, they were in a great wooden wheelhouse, generously outfitted but with tiny windows near the top, almost like prisoner transportation.

They found Steve’s carriage strange and he found their wheelhouse strange.

He supposed it wouldn’t be the last strange difference between them.

The town was at an incline, the castle sitting above the streets below and Steve got the impression everything in the town would be visible from the battlements or even from the windows.

Wide stone steps curved down from the entrance, flaring out on either side and lined up in formation along the edges seemed to be every member of staff that the Cunninghams employed in the castle, all standing stock still, hands folded in front or behind them, watching them.

He thought it was supposed to be intended as some kind of greeting or maybe even a display of wealth but Steve just felt uncomfortable all over again looking at all of these people forced to stand out in the rain.

Steve and Robin’s carriage came to a halt in front of the steps and with only a moment's hesitation—he couldn’t make the staff stand outside for any longer than they needed to—he pushed the door open and stepped out.

He cast an eye around at the staff and immediately took notice of two people very conspicuously missing.

The king and queen were nowhere in sight.

Steve watched as the rest of the caravan gradually ascended the incline after him and he felt himself wanting to fuss over the gifts he had brought, wanting to make sure they were all presentable and had made it here in one piece but his attention was diverted as Chrissy’s wheelhouse came to a stop behind their carriage and both she and Eddie stepped out.

They stared up at the imposing grey, weathered castle like they were heading to the gallows. It was like a weight had settled back on their shoulders and they were bowing under the pressure.

Behind him, his people started to get his gifts organised to present to the king and queen and Steve was left with nothing to do but to wonder if he was going to have to find his own way to the Great Hall to be received by them.

Chrissy and Eddie appeared at his side, unusually silent and stony faced.

Chrissy took his arm with a strained smile and for all the animosity that Robin and Eddie had shown each other, he stood on her side, almost as if to bolster her for the trek into the castle.

With a slight tug, she began to lead Steve up the steps and into the castle and Steve supposed there was no use hesitating. He was in this now and he needed to see it through to the end.

His kingdom was relying on him. He needed this to be a success. He wanted to get Chrissy out, he didn’t like the weight hanging over her and Eddie, it felt like they were being slowly suffocated.

He wanted to bring the two of them home. He just had to get through this month and all would be well.

With Chrissy on his arm, Robin by his side and Eddie next to her, Steve took the first step up the stone stairs.

[Part 1] [Part 3] [Part 5] [AO3] [Cover Art] [Eddie&Chrissy Art]

As always, major thanks and much love to @hbyrde36 for the magnificent beta work, @arelliann for their beautiful artwork, dividers and header, and to all my cheerleaders helping to keep me motivated. 🥰

#steddie #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #steve x eddie #penny00dreadful #eddie x steve #steddie fanfic #fanfic #steddie fic #royal au #royal pain #arelliann #steddiebang24

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ay-miphae · 6 months ago

Text

Starblade dashboard simulator. extremely unserious and heavily influenced by my own (and others') headcanons

(Unreality CW, character usernames at the bottom)

🌿 zoelogist. reblogged everything-is-fine

💌 counselor_ivy_xo

💗💗Affirmation of the day💗💗 Whatever emotions you're experiencing right now are valid. You are valuable and loved💗 (Don't ever hesitate to stop by if you need a listening ear💗)

🌞 everything-is-fine Follow

Absolutely☀️☀️

#💚💚

576 notes

🌌 Starofearendil reblogged

💫 MigratorRevelations Follow

💫Today's Horoscope💫

🌌 Starofearendil

i am this close to resorting to violence

🌌 Starofearendil

forgot this was a professional blog sorry

🌌 Starofearendil

💫Astronomy Picture of the Day💫

The colors of Alphan Saturn from Alphan Cassini🪐

#astronomy

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🤖 010101000100100000110001 reblogged 📖 sequencer

🦅 CAPTAINSPAAAACE

CAPTAIN'S LOG UPDATE: NO. 286

WE ARE STILL EN ROUTE TO SIRRAH! like we have been for nine months!!!! we are passing above the Alphan Oort cloud for the sixth (6) day in a row so keep your eyes peeled for any cool looking rocks i guess

ANYWAY IT'S TIME FOR A FIT CHECK💥💥

🌌 Starofearendil

Gorgeous as always my dear🩵❤️

🌿 zoelogist.

Get a room you two.

📖 sequencer Follow

days since last useful captain's log update: 285

🤖 010101000100100000110001 Follow

y'all should really let me do these updates in the future

#who am i kidding i'd make it worse #has anyone questioned why tf he's wearing both aviators and goggles

2,085 notes

👔 ForAlpha'sFuture reblogged 🎆 KILLJOYXx

🚀 Starblader Follow

let them go at it

🌞 everything-is-fine Follow

💫 MigratorRevelations Follow

Why am I on here.

🦅 CAPTAINSPAAAACE

i build a ship for you fools and save all your lives and this is how you repay me (voted for myself instantly)

🎆 KILLJOYXx

I HATE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU

👔 ForAlpha'sFuture Follow

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🎆 KILLJOYXx reblogged

🧋 bobazaher Follow

crazy how there's a drink cabinet here with at least fifty kinds of whiskey but no boba anywhere on this ship :(

🎆 KILLJOYXx

crazy how there's an entire migrator damn karaoke bar and ballpit here and not a single useful fixture on this migrator damned ship @CAPTAINSPAAAACE wtf

#get me out of here

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🎆 KILLJOYXx reblogged

👔 ForAlpha'sFuture Follow

I am once again extending my sincerest apologies for the state of Alpha and the 'Frame. I swear to do all within my capabilities to crush this cold machine, though I know words cannot assuage your griefs in this moment.

🎆 KILLJOYXx

#lmfao

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🤖 010101000100100000110001 reblogged 🎆 KILLJOYXx

🎆 KILLJOYXx

ok was anybody going to tell me that most people hydrate by carrying entire-ass bottles with water in them or was i supposed to figure this out on my own when there was a fire and everybody was magically equipped to deal with it except me???

🎆 KILLJOYXx

A SMALL ELECTRICAL FIRE. IT WASN'T MY FAULT.

🧪 entropy-of-eternity Follow

you aren't supposed to use water on an electrical fire???

🌿 zoelogist.

excuse me how do you hydrate then

📖 sequencer Follow

we had a fire on the Starblade???

🎆 KILLJOYXx

by the migrator you can't do this to me.

🎆 KILLJOYXx

"by the migrator you can't do this to me" yeah i had this coming.

🤖 010101000100100000110001 Follow

"by the migrator

you can't do this to me" yeah

i had this coming.

Beep boop! One of my many hobbies as an omniscient transcendent AI is scouring this hellsite's activity and repost anything that could be considered an Alphan haiku! I never make mistakes because I'm just that good. Yeah

10,884 notes

🧪 entropy-of-eternity Follow

the second law of thermodynamics states that as long as the flow of time continues, entropy will always increase in a system.

i fear what happens to us after an eternity. we rot. we decay.

i have much work to do.

#personal #do not reblog #shut down the guilt machine and wash your conscience clean of yesterday

3 notes

🌿 zoelogist.

Plant arrangement for the lovely @counselor_ivy_xo 💚💚 I hope you enjoy!

#crafts #plant arrangements #biology #seriously these are a lot of fun to do to relax or take the edge off

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🤖 010101000100100000110001 reblogged

🤖 010101000100100000110001 Follow

uh oh looks like someone's getting their living privileges revoked!

🤖 010101000100100000110001 Follow

nothing

452 notes

🌿zoelogist.: The Biologist 💌counselor_ivy_xo: The Counselor 🌞everything-is-fine: The Diplomat 🌌Starofearendil: The Astronomer 💫MigratorRevelations: The Prophet 🤖010101000100100000110001: TH-1 📖sequencer: The Historian 🦅CAPTAINSPAAAACE: The Captain 👔ForAlpha'sFuture: The President 🎆KILLJOYXx: The Opposition Leader 🧋bobazaher: The Preacher 🧪entropy-of-eternity: The Chemist 🚀Starblader: a Crew member

#enjoy.#this took me 1.25 source listens to complete but i had the idea and i knew what i had to do #image credits are ayreon?; NASA; and my doodles (iykyk the tobi refs)#ayreon #the source #arjen lucassen #dashboard simulator

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vickyvicarious · 1 year ago

Text

There were two lines in particular that stood out to me today, and made me wonder just how long the Captain has suspected the first mate of being the cause of all these disappearances. They are as follows:

Just as I was beginning to hope that the mate would come out calmer—for I heard him knocking away at something in the hold, and work is good for him—there came up the hatchway a sudden, startled scream, which made my blood run cold, and up on the deck he came as if shot from a gun—a raging madman, with his eyes rolling and his face convulsed with fear. [...] I suppose I know the secret too, now. It was this madman who had got rid of the men one by one, and now he has followed them himself.

August 2

There are two main things going on here. First, the mate is a violent madman; secondly, the Captain knows that work will calm him down. This latter implies that the Captain has taken pains to manage the mate's temper in the past. And in doing so, it adds an extra facet of guilt to his assumption that the mate was the killer all along, because he knew at least a little bit, and he thought he'd been handling it. He thought he understood just how far the mate would go, and how to stop him, and it turns out now that he was blind all along. I imagine he feels responsible for failing to protect the rest of his crew. The familiarity implied by the Captain knowing how to manage the mate also suggests that even if he started suspecting him a while ago, he might not have wanted to admit to it, even to himself.

I decided to look back over the previous entries with the Captain's perspective of the mate in mind, and honestly... I can definitely see where his suspicions would have grown. There are also several little moments of him trying to 'manage' the mate, as well as some insight into the mate's own character and the reasons for his reactions. But it does involve a fair bit of quoting, so I'm sticking it under a cut for length.

Mate could not make out what was wrong; they only told him there was something, and crossed themselves. Mate lost temper with one of them that day and struck him. Expected fierce quarrel, but all was quiet.

14 July

This is the first mention of the mate. He is immediately linked with violence. From the Captain's perspective, he gets furious with the crew's superstitions and is very quick to resort to violence. The Captain expects things to escalate (possibly due to knowing the mate, possibly due to the crew reacting badly to one of them being hit) but is pleasantly surprised when they don't.

With later context, it seems apparent that the reason the mate is so furious is specifically because of the something that doesn't get named. Perhaps he thinks he knows what the worst 'something' is and that it can't be here; perhaps he just is angry that they won't elaborate. But the superstition is what makes him cross over from anger into outright violence, in what seems like an unplanned and heat-of-the-moment reaction.

Men more downcast than ever. All said they expected something of the kind, but would not say more than there was something aboard. Mate getting very impatient with them; feared some trouble ahead.

16 July

It's the same thing here. The Captain is outright wary of the mate's reaction to the crew, and is paying close attention, likely with an intention to manage the situation when tensions build too much. But the mate is once again bothered most by the vague fear of something supernatural. Again I wonder if it's more about them considering it being here at all (he knows It can't follow him onto the water) or with them refusing to name their fear to him (maybe he knows of other things as well).

Later in the day I got together the whole crew, and told them, as they evidently thought there was some one in the ship, we would search from stem to stern. First mate angry; said it was folly, and to yield to such foolish ideas would demoralise the men; said he would engage to keep them out of trouble with a handspike. I let him take the helm, while the rest began thorough search, all keeping abreast, with lanterns: we left no corner unsearched. As there were only the big wooden boxes, there were no odd corners where a man could hide. Men much relieved when search over, and went back to work cheerfully. First mate scowled, but said nothing.

17 July

The Captain's willingness to capitulate to the crew's fears angers the mate. Knowing this, we see the Captain give the mate a job to do to keep him occupied while everyone else gets involved in the search. From his POV, this seems to work to keep him calm/stop him from realizing his threat, and it allows the Captain to calm everyone else: a win-win. But I think the mate's objections reveal much more about himself than they do the crew. He is the one who would be demoralized, who is trying so hard not to yield to such foolish ideas. He's rejecting everything to do with the idea of a monster on board, because he knows/fears it too well to handle himself. If he lets himself acknowledge the possibility there's no way he could keep it together, so he lashes out instead. By being left in charge of the helm, he gets to avoid feeding his own fears, and meanwhile everyone else's reassured reaction probably reassures whatever part of himself knows the truth.

Rough weather last three days, and all hands busy with sails—no time to be frightened. Men seem to have forgotten their dread. Mate cheerful again, and all on good terms.

22 July

This entry is dual-purpose. First, the mate has also been extremely busy, and this is a good distraction for him from his fear. Secondly, the crew being so busy means that they haven't been bringing up their suspicions, and so it's easier for him to ignore his own. While they have only forgotten their dread, he's described as cheerful. Possibly that's just in contrast to his prior anger, but it might also hint that he is outright happy at things seeming normal again/the ability to shove all suspicion down.

Men all in a panic of fear; sent a round robin, asking to have double watch, as they fear to be alone. Mate angry. Fear there will be some trouble, as either he or the men will do some violence.

24 July

The Captain's worry for the crew is more likely to be mutiny due to their fear; he worries that the mate will lose control of his temper and try to beat them down in order to shut them up. What he's missing is that the mate's reaction is also related to fear. Giving in to a double watch is as much as saying there is something to be afraid of, which he desperately does not want to do.

Honorary mention for the lack of mention of the mate in the 28 July entry as well - once again, they've been working endlessly, and there isn't any mention of the mate. You might expect someone's temper to get shorter when they're sleep-deprived. But the mate is calmed by being busy and by not having to listen to the crew's fears.

Are now without second mate, and crew in a panic. Mate and I agreed to go armed henceforth and wait for any sign of cause.

29 July

This line applies to all three. The Captain allowing the mate to go armed may seem to be an odd way to manage his temper, but I think it comes down to giving him more of a job to do. Working calms him down. Having the ability and responsibility to do something will reassure him. And of course, as first mate it's simply his job to be one of the two men making these decisions and keeping their heads cool when everyone else is panicking. On the other hand, at least in retrospect, this moment must contribute to making him look suspicious later. He now has an excuse to be armed at all times and suddenly things start getting worse much faster, almost like he doesn't need to wait for an opportunity like before.

And finally, from the mate's POV, this moment marks him finally capitulating of his own accord to his fears. He's no longer able to ignore the situation, or grumpily follow the orders of others who are being foolish. No, now he is involved in the choice to stay armed, and by taking action himself he's started to open the door to his own fears.

Retired worn out; slept soundly; awaked by mate telling me that both man of watch and steersman missing.

30 July

Except for the first man who went missing, it has often been unclear who discovers the missing people. But now we get the mate being the one to deliver the news. At least in hindsight, this can't help but make him seem more suspicious. Right after the Captain agrees that both of them should be armed and ready, the mate delivers news that two men have gone missing at once. If he is the one who did it, then surely this timing suggests that he found it easier to kill them. That's not to say it would have been impossibly for him to just pick up a weapon earlier, but in the Captain's frame of mind this timing probably makes him more suspicious.

We seem to be drifting to some terrible doom. Mate now more demoralised than either of men. His stronger nature seems to have worked inwardly against himself. Men are beyond fear, working stolidly and patiently, with minds made up to worst. They are Russian, he Roumanian.

1 August

After his discovery of the two missing crewmembers, the mate is miserable. Here the readers finally get the reveal of his nationality, suggesting that he's known of vampires all along. And he's miserable and afraid. Likely repeating to himself again and again that it's impossible, they can't cross running water, etc. Since the ship is drifting, he can't even throw himself into his work in the same way, and this forced inaction makes everything worse for him. Meanwhile the Captain sees the mate's condition and views it as his stronger nature turned inwardly to his detriment. This phrasing is a little confusing but I think could definitely contribute to seeing him as suspicious, in that his mental stability is suffering.

Woke up from few minutes' sleep by hearing a cry, seemingly outside my port. Could see nothing in fog. Rushed on deck, and ran against mate. Tells me heard cry and ran, but no sign of man on watch. One more gone. Lord, help us! Mate says we must be past Straits of Dover, as in a moment of fog lifting he saw North Foreland, just as he heard the man cry out.

2 August

Sure, there's no one else to do it. But it must feel suspicious that suddenly the mate is the one delivering all information. Once again, he's the one delivering news of another death he's been just too late to prevent. He's the only one who knows where they are in the fog, and the news he delivers isn't welcome. If the Captain has been harboring any suspicions at all, or even if he's just beginning to do so, all of this timing can be recontextualized to make the mate seem very suspicious.

Of course, we readers know that his story must be the truth. The mate has finally admitted what must be going on to himself, and yet he doesn't understand how, nor has he been able to do anything at all to prevent it. The futility and fear is driving him mad. Which brings us back to today...

I dared not leave it, so shouted for the mate. After a few seconds he rushed up on deck in his flannels. He looked wild-eyed and haggard, and I greatly fear his reason has given way. [...] He came close to me and whispered hoarsely, with his mouth to my ear, as though fearing the very air might hear: "It is here; I know it, now. On the watch last night I saw It, like a man, tall and thin, and ghastly pale. It was in the bows, and looking out. I crept behind It, and gave It my knife; but the knife went through It, empty as the air." And as he spoke he took his knife and drove it savagely into space. Then he went on: "But It is here, and I'll find It. It is in the hold, perhaps in one of those boxes. I'll unscrew them one by one and see. You work the helm." [...] "Save me! save me!" he cried, and then looked round on the blanket of fog. His horror turned to despair, and in a steady voice he said: "You had better come too, captain, before it is too late. He is there. I know the secret now. The sea will save me from Him, and it is all that is left!"

3 August

The Captain finally openly admits his suspicions. That, or perhaps he was denying them to himself all along, and only after seeing the mate's latest reaction did he think back over the earlier journey. He's got time to do so while stuck at the helm, after all. Even now he still hopes that the exertion will calm the mate down to a point where he can be reasoned with, until finally his return from the hold - and immediate suicide - put paid to that notion. And yet, the guilt must be even stronger because even lost in his violent delusion (as the Captain sees it), the mate never tries to hurt the Captain, and even tries to tell him how to 'save' himself. It suggests a kind of connection, maybe a friendship, that makes the Captain's conclusion about the mate's guilt all the sadder. Not only is it his responsibility as the captain to protect his crew, but as the only person who the mate doesn't want to hurt/possibly who really knew him he should have been able to see what was going on and stop it. None of that is reasonable really, he's absolutely been doing his best, but I think it could be how he might feel about it.

Meanwhile, we see that the mate tried to kill the vampire once already. In reading back over these entries, I think I've realized something. The mate has internally admitted the possibility of a vampire for several days now, though he hasn't spoken to anyone else. He saw it the last night, and was unable to stop it in time to save his crewmate, but finally was determined to act against it at all costs. It, still. He crept up from behind, he didn't get a good look. It's not until today that he finally 'knows the secret'. It's not until today that he understands "He is there." I think the final straw for the mate may have been his discovery, when unscrewing the boxes, that this isn't just any vampire. This is Count Dracula. It's Him. The vampire. And the mate screams, flees in fear, despairs, gives up on any plan of fighting at all - knowing that this is not a fight he could ever win. Instead he flings himself into the water. After all, in its depths a man can sleep -- as a man.

#dracula daily #captain of the demeter #crew of the demeter #my meta

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rillils · 11 months ago

Note

no bc at the end of the day, when steve and bucky were on the helicarrier, and steve already stopped it from killing a bunch of people, steve didnt fight back

because at the end of the day, he took every single one of bucky's punches thinking that its his fault that this happened to bucky

because at the end of the day, Steven Grant Rogers just stood there while he was getting beaten up

because at the end of the day, James Buchanan Barnes knew him

NO BECAUSE AT THE END OF THE DAY, STEVE WAS WITH HIM TIL THE END OF THE LINE

oh god THE FEELS, honey, why do you do this to me 😭

oh. oh no. darling I must ramble, I just, I can't help it, I can't *shrieks*

just. how relieving it must be for Steve, to know that he doesn't have to fight Bucky anymore, that he doesn't have to hurt Bucky anymore. now that his mission is complete and the world is safe again, Steve doesn't have to be Captain America anymore, and you can see the shift in him the moment he lets himself leave all of that behind - the world, the public, his mantle, his duty. it's like a weight has been lifted off his chest and he can finally breathe.

he physically divests himself of all of it: he takes off his cowl, lets go of his shield, and stands before Bucky as only Steve Rogers - because at the end of the day, that's the man Bucky knew, that's the man Bucky saw whenever he looked at him.

it's kind of like that day, in that bar, 70 years before, when Bucky told him that no, Cap wasn't the one he was ready to lay down his life for: Steve was.

what Steve is saying now is just, the other side of the coin. Captain America might have other priorities; he might have to put the greater good first, and worry about the rest later. But Steve's number one priority is Bucky: everything else is just background noise. and the man standing before Bucky now is Steve, as vulnerable and true as he can be.

he's not an ideal, or a symbol, or an abstract concept: he's a man made of flesh and blood, and he's in so much pain, and he's stubbornly forcing himself to stand upright rather than curling in on himself like his body desperately wants to, because there's no agony worse than knowing that Bucky's right here, and still just out of reach.

you know, we always say that Steve stops fighting back in this scene, but that's not quite true, I don't think. Steve is still fighting, just not in the same way as before. and what he's fighting for now, is for Bucky to come home.

Your name is James Buchanan Barnes, he says. You are my friend. You've known me your whole life. Come back to me, he says, I'm here waiting for you.

this is how Steve's fighting back against Bucky's rebuttal: not with his fists, not with his shield, but with his heart. each time Bucky hits him, vibranium against mere human flesh, breaking skin, bruising bone, desperately trying to make Steve shut up, resorting to violence because that's the only way Bucky can defend himself against the nightmarish reality that's coming down around him, Steve responds with love. with all the incommensurable love he's been carrying in his heart for Bucky all these years, through time and death.

Steve responds with the only thing he's got left to give, after he's given all of himself; and, incidentally, the thing Bucky has been denied the most, ever since he fell out of that train.

what Steve is saying to Bucky, in every way he can, is: I love you.

You have a name. You're not a machine, you're not a thing to be owned and used. You are a person. You are Bucky. I know you.

and how many times have we said that to know someone, to really know them inside and out, is to love them?

I know you. I've shared my whole life with you. I love you.

but even more than that, I think he's telling Bucky, You know me, too. You loved me, too.

because Bucky may have been told otherwise for 70 years, but he too has a heart. he too is allowed to feel, to care, to love, to think, to just- be. to a man who has been brutalized beyond all comprehension, weaponized, dehumanized by any means possible, Steve is saying, You are human, and they cannot erase that, no matter how hard they try.

and I think this is where I start crying, 'cause gsjdkfldkg

choosing to echo Bucky's own words from when they were younger, that's, god that's just.

first of all, it tells you just how important those words were to Steve, how deeply they touched him, and how much he cherished them all his life, if they've stayed with him until now. second, it's easy to assume that possibly, nah, probably, nay, definitely, it didn't happen just the once -- Steve must have heard Bucky say it time and again, right? every time Steve got too stubborn, when he thought he should shoulder the weight of the whole world on his own, Bucky must have reminded him of his vows, and told him that he would never be alone.

but- but we don't even need speculation here, do we? we have proof of that.

when Steve asked Bucky if he was staying in Europe to keep fighting, didn't Bucky tell him he would follow him, yes, even "into the jaws of death"? when Steve tried to tell him to save himself, didn't Bucky scream No, not without you? and isn't the true meaning behind those words always one and the same? I'll be by your side until the end, no matter what.

that's a lifetime's worth of loyalty, of love, of selfless devotion that Steve's offering back to Bucky now. This is who we are, you and I, Steve says with what little strength he's got left. This is who we have always been. We don't give up on each other, we don't leave each other behind.

and if it's true that Steve's Bucky is gone forever, if it's true that he died a long time ago, broken over and over, then the least Steve can do is stay with him, with what's left of him, until his own dying breath. because that's what they promised each other. besides, Steve's already lived in a world where he'd lost Bucky; he's not going to go through that again.

Then finish it, he says. If you must, if that's what you need from me, then kill me. If your hands are cold, lay me on your fire to keep them warm. I'm not letting you down again.

and when a glimpse of recognition finally appears in Bucky's eyes, moments before the glass pane under them crashes and Steve falls, and you know that Steve's words have finally broken through the programming, then--!!! *SCREAMS*

for a second before he falls, just for a split second, Steve looks up and there's Bucky looking back at him. doesn't that just kill you??? that Steve probably thinks he's dying, just when he'd finally got Bucky back? must they always be just out of reach of each other? must one of them always, inevitably fall, ripped away from the other?

but. but Bucky gives their story a different ending, this time.

Bucky jumps after him. with a dislocated shoulder, a possible concussion, several bruises, and a fucking storm raging in his head, he dives into the Potomac and grabs onto Steve for dear life, dragging both of their spent bodies back to the shore.

he has to go; but first, he makes sure Steve's still breathing.

and and and and and honey, just, the way he pauses and looks down at Steve for those endless seconds, without saying a single word, just lingering there for a while, I'm- I'm getting emotional just thinking about it.

what is he seeing? does he remember Steve's name, has it come back to him? is he fighting off a different image of Steve, resurfacing from the back of his mind? does he want to reach out, touch Steve again just to make sure he's real? is he wondering why he jumped in the first place? is he struggling to understand? to figure out where this instinct to protect Steve comes from? is he trying to commit Steve's face to memory, afraid that he'll forget again? is he saying goodbye? is he hoping Steve will wake up and beg him to stay, tell him more, call him by that name again?

ALL I KNOW FOR SURE IS I'M CRYING AGAIN

#stucky just stucky #stucky #catws #personal #I HAVE TOO MANY EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW I THINK I'M GONNA HAVE TO GO SIT IN THE DARK FOR A WHILE #*muffled sobbing in the background*#honeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy why do you hurt me sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo #why do our babies hurt us allllllllllllllllll #😭😭😭

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raygirlramblings · 1 year ago

Text

Well the people have spoken and are willing for me to indulge in a ridiculously assumptive breakdown of the main 4 characters in the upcoming Captain Laserhawk show. So thank you for that!

Keep in mind the following thoughts are ONLY MY PERSONAL OPINIONS and based COMPLETELY on the trailers and teasers we have been provided with. I know nothing about the show beyond that, I have no connection to the show staff and my word should not be held as gospel. I am ready for the show to completely undermine everything I type here, and you should be prepared for that too ;)

Also this is only going to be a post dissecting the 4 leads (Dolph, Pey’j, Jade and Bullfrog) so no discussion about Rayman or any other characters unless they directly relate to the main 4.

Also no Cody Rhodes for obvious reasons 🤯

With that out of the way let’s dive into this.

Dolph Laserhawk

I was perfectly willing to write off our stoic lead as just that. The angst-filled prettyboy who lurks in the background and doesn’t want to get involved with SuperMaxx or the warden’s plans. Dolph isn’t a gung-ho hero type. He doesn’t revel in his skills or even seem to enjoy being a badass. Heck in the Rainbow 6 trailer we can see he can be overpowered in a physical fight if he’s alone. Compared to Alex’s jokes and stunts, Dolph just wants to get the job done without quips. He doesn’t seem to have any particular connection to his new team and particularly doesn’t seem to have time for Bullfrog. He comes across as very much a Sasuke-type. Brooding, introverted and stoic.

But I also see in this character a level of vulnerability which makes him far more interesting. We are told the only reason he is alive and has an arm laser is because of Eden, a corrupt system that turned him into a tool in exchange for his life. Then when he tried to rebel against that system that hurt him he is betrayed by the man he loved, someone he trusted on and off mission.

This shot of Dolph and Alex lying together says a WHOLE lot with Alex completely relaxed on his back and Dolph snuggled into him. Dolph felt SAFE with Alex. He wasn’t just a lover, he was a trusted ally who would always be there to catch him. It’s no wonder his betrayal stung Dolph so deeply and left him unwilling to ever trust others again.

It will be interesting to see how the group works around this. How do they win the trust of someone who has been hurt this badly, especially when the only reason they are together in the first place is under threat of death. And why should Dolph feel to befriend them? To his mind either they will betray him like everyone else or will die and leave him alone.

Bullfrog

I think it’s obvious that Bullfrog is a favourite character of the show staff. We’ve had the most cannon information presented to us out of the main cast and out of it comes 2 major aspects to Bullfrog’s character. His slightly goofy personality, and his confidence/pride in his abilities.

Despite making jokes and attempting to banter with his team Bullfrog is a formidable fighter unafraid to resort to violence if the situation requires. However much like Dolph he doesn’t kill because he enjoys the bloodshed. It’s work. It’s a means to an end. And while he seems to enjoy the stealth aspects of the job part of me feels that he doesn’t really ENJOY killing if he doesn’t have to. His teaser shows him killing 3 powerful guards to complete his mission, and afterwards he seems tired and downhearted compared to his bravado before their deaths. Generally speaking assassins (especially not Assassins Creed assassins) are not random murderers. They have a strict code they follow to complete their missions, and I just get the feeling that Bullfrog would rather take out obstacles non-lethally until the moment comes he has to kill.

If this is true it will be a fascinating exploration of the character to see him be this goofy guy forced to kill against his own moral code. To put his highly trained skills to the act of espionage for shady purposes at the threat of death if he refuses. Will this break him?

As for his relationships with the other characters it will be fun to see how his humour bounces off them, and whether that is affected upon seeing his incredible abilities in battle. Bullfrog certainly seems to be loyal to his new team, shown in multiple instances to jump into the line of fire to protect them from bullets.

Pey’j

While relatively under represented in the trailers the strongest trait I take from Pey’j is that he is compassionate to others. He clearly states that he would protect Jade no matter what. We also see him in Bullfrog’s teaser ushering injured people to the safety of a van, and he is confused and horrified when law enforcement would rather shoot at him than help people.

This on top of his seemingly incredible strength and ferocity makes him one of my favourite archetypes, the gruff guy with the heart of gold. Pey’j just comes across as a dude who wants to live in peace but can’t in a corrupt world because everything is cruel and wrong. The injustice of this gives him the energy to keep fighting. So he uses the skills he has to protect the weak and help where he can. I hope the show builds on this and allows his gentle ‘dad’ persona to shine because by god, the team needs it XD.

Judging from the few screenshots and clips we have it seems that Dolph and Pey’j seem to get on well in each other’s company so it will be fun to see what kind of relationship they build. As for Jade, it will be interesting to know how long they have known one another. Either Pey’j dedication to her comes from a long shared history, or it is a new development which speaks to his loyalty and willingness to protect people he sees as worthy.

Jade

Sadly Jade has the least amount of info to go on from official sources so far. She seems to be confident and streetwise, clearly skilled at espionage and undercover work complete with her trusty camera. However I’m glad they showed her displaying some level of vulnerability and didn’t just make her a generic, mean ‘action hero girl’ (kinda like how the Warden is but she is supposed to display authority and coldness).

She is freaked out by the exploding head bomb reveal, we see her being awkward when she’s captured, and she appears to be worried for Pey’j when he swears he’d do anything to protect her. Jade doesn’t seem to be the kind of person to let others control her, but also doesn’t want people to die for her sake. She seems empathetic and curious, and I can’t wait to learn more about her personality and how she interacts with the rest of the team.

Aargh, I with I had more to say about her but really we have so little to go on >_<. She barely even has any lines in the trailers or teasers! I hope this isn’t foreshadowing to her role in the team and in the show.

And that’s what I have so far based on the info I’ve seen. As stated above this is all purely my speculation and I’m ok with being proven wrong by this show and it’s Remix nature.

ALSO if you have your own insights to share or want to call out something I ave missed or got wrong, don’t hesitate to do so! Fandom thrives on conversation and shared experience :)

#captain laserhawk #discussion #Long post

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0lshadyl0 · 2 years ago

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How would Yandere Sabo (and shanks ) react if their darling show interest in another person?(im ok with Drabble or HCs or just your thoughts on the matter ) (How would their react if their show interest in male or even a female interest ?) 🥰

Babe, have you woken up on the wrong side of the bed and chosen violence as the solution to all the problems of your day? do you want to watch the world burn? they are both jealous people, and it's a bad idea to show interest in someone other than them, because they're both the type of yandere who, if need be, will take down the competition, most of all Shanks, at least Sabo is merciful enough to give a second chance, a painful second chance, Shanks in return… you're not going to see that sword come cutting you in half

Sabo is violently jealous, not with his darling, but of Darling's love interest. That poor wretch, regardless of whether he is a man or a woman, will experience what it is like not to be able to walk for a few months, yes, that's his star move apart from breaking your skull (and honestly it's better not to walk for a while or be paralyzed than lose your whole life) just imagine:

A poor man or woman in a dark alley, on a cold moonless night, scared, clothes torn until they were practically naked, covered in bruises, an occasional tooth missing, eyes swollen with an unpleasant color, knees bent awkwardly unnatural as they try to beg for mercy from that strange figure that has been beating them for hours

"Clemency?, I'm being merciful to you right now with this, what she asked of me was much worse, but, if you survive tonight, disappear and never be near y/n again because if so, She will realize that I did not do the favor as she wanted"

Oh yeah, for all the love interests you have, in their minds, you are the bad guy, a witch who can't see anyone happy or is jealous of someone else's beauty or success. Sabo is just a man in love that indeed you manipulated to hurt other people since he is strong and has influences

In short, you are the worst

In the case of Shanks, there are no second chances, if your love interest is a man, leave him for dead, you show interest in that person one day and the next he has already suffered a tragic accident

Although it also depends on his mood, Shanks isn't a bad person after all, and he usually doesn't resort to violence as easily as other people would, but when he makes a decision, he makes sure it's permanent

You also have to take into account other factors of who your love interest is, it definitely cannot be any of his crew since absolutely everyone, even the most stupid of them, knows that you are the captain’s woman, so no one will try to get your attention and in the unfortunate case that they do, they will try to avoid you or treat you badly so that you lose interest; This is one of the few scenarios where Shanks and the rest of the crew accept that you are not treated with respect, that is, the crew appreciate you, but you are putting the life of a nakama at risk, please be more aware and just look at the captain

If your love interest is not part of his crew, is not someone of importance, and is a man, Shanks can go two routes, if he is feeling in a good mood, he will simply make that person unattractive, not only to you but also for the whole world, Shanks will make one or some of his subordinates take care of that person, how? you may ask, I don't have the answer, but let's say that some limbs of the body are missing and now your love interest looks a bit… disfigured, honestly, it's kind of sad to see

The second route is the classic disappear your love interest from your sight and kill him, there is not much to imagine there, his body will end up buried on any random island (because Shanks has principles) or it will be thrown into the sea to be eaten of some marine king and all this behind your back

"How strange, yesterday I met a very nice man on this island, but today I can't find him anywhere" you sigh a little disappointed for not seeing the young man who had caught your attention

"Seriously? It's a shame y/n, who wouldn't want to see a woman as attractive as you again" says Shanks as he continued to drink from his bottle of liquor, sitting on top of a barrel, located exactly above where the body of the man you were pining for at that moment lay buried lifeless "but don't worry, you still have your beloved captain to give you all the attention a pretty young woman like you needs" he winks at you to let out a laugh which makes you laugh since it is contagious since he is very charismatic

Well, I was telling you that in the case of Sabo, regardless of gender, your love interest will suffer a terrible beating and blame you for the rest of their life since you are the cause of their misery; with Shanks, it is different, after all, he has a weakness for women, especially if they are young and beautiful

Do not be confused or angry, obviously, you are the number one in his heart, the one who will become his woman, his official wife, and the mother of his future children, but he is not blind, if that girl caught your interest, wouldn't she catch his interest too?

Here are three options that I'll quickly explain because there isn't much to say in these situations and the post is getting long (seriously, why can't I make short posts?):

Option one – Polyamorous relationship as your love interest is not a man, which means that she does not have the natural way to impregnate you, she is not a threat to him and his goals, she is a blessing in disguise, now he has not one but two beautiful young and fertile women, in this scenario he would let you go and pursue your crush, but obviously he will do the same

Let's be honest, as pretty and nice as you are, you could be Boa Hancock with the personality of Nico Robin, you're no match for Shanks, your love interest will fall at the feet of the charismatically sexy redhead and be his girlfriend you will have no choice but to enter into a relationship with him if you also want to be with your crush

at least the threesomes will be amazing, Shanks will give them both a lot of love (and cum) and wait for both of them to get pregnant at the same time, so their children will have someone to grow up with

Option two – Lesbianism does not triumph today in this scenario we can say that your love interest, despite meeting the requirements of being young, attractive, and fertile, her personality is not to the taste of the redhead, (it could probably be because she spoke bad of you or you were not as interesting to her as she was to you and she communicated it to Shanks in a way that he did not end up liking), more importantly, your love interest is not interested in other women, rather sees them as competition

So Shanks, respecting your love interest's sexual orientations, which definitely makes getting rid of her easier, he'll either help monetarily to get her out of your sight or get her a partner of her liking, whichever It ends in, you will not have the girl you like, better settle with your captain

Option Three – What are those chains for? Easy, fast, and simple, she meets the requirements of what he likes, but either her personality is disgusting, or she probably talks bad about you or she doesn't like you or maybe she likes you too, but she doesn't plan on sharing you with the captain, much less accepting his seed in her womb and having children with him, and Shanks isn't feeling generous in that scenario because of her response

So the Yonkou makes the most reasonable decision he can make while in a bad mood, knock her out, and let his entire crew take advantage of her (those who want to, I know my dear Benn is a decent, principled man, who likes mutual consent and will only give his dick to nice girls who deserve it) then chains her up and sells her for a cheap price (because he won't even give her the privilege of being a high-class slave which is why she was gang raped for several weeks) to the human auction house in the Sabaody Archipelago

And you, you never realized what happened, yesterday you talked to her, and today she is gone

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