how-to-train-your-pomni

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

So I thought of a cool way to put Gummigoo And his Gang in your villains Au

What if Caine decided that his group of Caring criminals needed a bit of a challenge

So he Created the Candy Force (You can change the name if you want) A new advanced A.I Police force

Gummigoo- He's captain of the candy force and He's a master At firearms and martial arts

Chad- He's not the strongest or the smartest but he's an excellent sniper And he uses his incredible eyesight to see where his target is, even in the dark

Max- Don't let his height fool you, He's an expert at dodging quick attacks And using his own height To hide in plain sight. He also knows how to defuse bombs

Loolilalu- She may be kind hearted, But that doesn't mean she can't put up a fight. She just prefers to negotiate Rather than fight. But if negotiation doesn't work Violence is the last resort, she's a black belt in martial arts And is an expert on close range To long-rang Firearms, And is the co captain of candy force

All of them were designed with one instruction: Put The amazing villainous wackos to justice

And even when they get killed, Caine Bring them back. He has this is the most fun He has creating a new A.I

This is actually a really cool idea! Honestly, I was wondering how I'd incorporate the Candy Kingdom Fellas, and this is perfect!

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Jax, trying to be genuinely 💕romantic💕 instead of facing his problems head on: *Reading a French Poem Some Random NPC Wrote* Ahem! Pomni, you're like no other woman I've ever met, ever. Your temper is to be admired! People from around the world come to watch you! I- *Slowly Losing Confidence as Confusion Sets In* Wait... Your eyes look like... marbles? Your hair... is satin. And you look... like a rock.

Pomni's Collar: ...Are you having a stroke?

Jax: No! I swear, I'm just as confused!

Roxy: Don't you speak fluent French?

Jax: Yes! But this is... so badly translated! I-I can't understand this, and it's in a language I know!

Bitty Pomni, from her place on Jax’s right shoulder: That's his way of saying "I don't know how to talk to my girlfriend."

Roxy: Now THAT I believe.

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Me, anxiously awaiting the next post like:

I know, I've been starving y'all and being so rude. Hogging all the PA!AU content to myself 😔

Don't worry lovelies! You'll be getting at least one post either later today or a few posts tomorrow!

(Please don't hate me life's been super shitty lately ^^')

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Truly the Healthiest Option

(And we welcome to the stage: Roxy! The judgement coming from her body is truly palpable)

Jax: *Holding Bitty Pomni Close Like a Long Lost Lover*

Roxy: That is honestly disgusting.

Ragatha: I don't agree with it either, but, *Places a Hand on Roxy's Shoulder* he's sort of getting better, right? Maybe this is a good way to encourage him and Pomni to get back on good terms!

Roxy, mentally: Bitch, if you don't-

Roxy, out loud: Eh, I guess. Still hate him, though.

Roxy, mentally: Fake ass doll, why is she defending him? My hat only has so much room!

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

My Two Other TADC Blogs Because I'm Feeling Like a Queen~

@the-funniest-bunny (NSFW Blog)

@the-amazing-villainous-wackos (Villain AU Blog)

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

You should make another blog for the villain AU, that way you can keep it to one AU per blog! I will follow you on each and everyone, I hope you know that.

That Would Actually Help My Scatterbrain Keep Up With Everything, Honestly

I felt kinda guilty adding two more AUs and unrelated PA!AU content to this blog. Let's get a third TADC Blog out there! Whoo!

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Trust, PA!Pomni Almost Physically Cringed Upon Hearing (From Gangle, Who Was Just Trying to Create Conversation) About Her Tiny Self

Then she thought about how things have been going lately and decided that, while it certainly is weird to think about, Bitty Pomni makes Jax happy and somewhat open to mature discussion. So, she just... deals with it.

Strange when one thinks about it; Bitty Pomni gets treated better than PA!Pomni, the literal mother to PA!Jax’s son. Huh.

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Canon!Pomni: Thank you! Finally, someone agrees with me!

Villain!Pomni: For now. :)

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And yes, PA!AU Jax still has Bitty Pomni! She is his rock in these trying times.

PA!Jax: *To Bitty Pomni* You're the only one who understands me.

Bitty Pomni: I don't know how or why. But, I get kisses and cuddles so I guess I'll deal with it.

PA!Jax: *Covering Bitty Pomni’s Mouth* SHH! They aren't s'posed to know that!

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Villain!Pomni is What Some May Call an "Oversharer"

Canon!Pomni probably knows more about her evil counterpart than Villain!Jax does at this point.

And yes, if her husband could eat meat, Villain!Pomni would DEFINITELY be the crazed butcher type.

Villain!Jax, tasting a piece of meat his wife cooked: Whoa, baby this is really good!

Canon!Pomni, tasting a piece as well: Yeah, this is surprisingly good! What is it?

Villain!Pomni: *Silently Stares at Them With an Unnerving Smile*

Villain!Jax: Baby... what is this?

Villain!Pomni: *Continues to Stare*

Canon!Pomni: WHAT DID YOU JUST FEED US?!

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Caine, out of nowhere: Say! Why don't we all do a random costume change?!

Everyone: No!

Kinger, under his breath: The robe protects my child.

Caine: TOO BAD! *Snaps* Have fun, my Morally Malignant Magpies! *Blips Away*

Gangle, in a uniform similar to the one in Episode four: Oh... this... *Hopefully* Isn't too bad?

Ragatha, dressed like a cowgirl: *Scoffs* Easy for you to say! AGH! I haven’t had to wear this type of shit since I was in the real world!

Zooble, dressed like a banker: I honestly don't know how this makes me feel.

Kinger, in a business suit: MY HANDS! THEY'RE OUT! THE HANDS HURT THE CHILD; HIDE MY DAUGHTER!

Jax, dressed like his Canon counterpart: I... think I can make this work? I dunno. Babe! What do you think?

Pomni, dressed in a frilly pink princess dress and a crown: *Whimpers and Pouts* I LOOK LIKE A DOLL!

Ragatha, pulling a dagger out of nowhere: HEY! What's wrong with looking like a doll?!

Pomni: Not some stupid Raggedy Ann doll! I look like a Malibu Barbie gone wrong!

Zooble: Pretty sure that says something about you specifically.

Pomni: *Wails and Tosses Her Crown Onto the Floor Before Running Away*

Jax, frantically: BABY! WAIT, DON'T GO! YOU STILL LOOK EVIL TO ME! *Races After Pomni*

Ragatha, pocketing her dagger: Ugh, those two are gross.

Gangle, sighing dreamily: Grossly in love.

Kinger, quietly: The child is safe...

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Villain!Pomni: If you're asking me, I typically spend my "alone time" with my husband. Who doesn't really eat anything other than vegetables. Stupid rabbit avatar; we could do SO MUCH if he ate meat! *Remembers What the Question Was* Oh, but if you're asking her, *Points at Canon!Pomni* both would probably benefit her.

Canon!Pomni, shaking slightly: What does that mean??? How would I benefit from-

Villain!Pomni: Shh... it's okay. It's okay.

Canon!Pomni: I want to go home.

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Poll~!

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Im being so fr right now I had a dream where you cassually mentioned using generative AI to write and I was so devistated that I woke up and accidentally called my cat Ragatha while I was still groggy

Holy shit, what even are dreams?

No need to worry, all of my ideas are mine. All shade to AI artists of any kind, anyone who relies on a computer to make any form of content for themselves and calls it their "own work" is (in my personal opinion) a disgrace to the artist community.

Here's the Exit door for anyone who encourages AI works: 🚪

Also, on a scale of 1-10, how confused was your cat? You may need to call the cat Ragatha from now on, R.I.P.

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Thank you! I'm glad my idea is being enjoyed!

It wasn't originally my intent for the two casts to interact as often as they do, but I now think it makes the interactions with each other (both in their own worlds and together) a bit more fun.

They certainly learn a LOT about each other, and while a couple bond (Villain!Pomni, Villain!Jax, and Canon!Jax; as Well as Both Gangles and Both Zoobles), the others... tolerate each other. Canon!Ragatha could NEVER get along with her villainess counterpart, Canon!Pomni constantly feels like her counterpart just always wants to have an orgy, and Canon!Kinger gets weird vibes from his own counterpart (which is a feat and a half in itself considering how quickly Kinger normally just accepts situations despite the danger).

I would adore seeing fanfics of my AUs! Stirring up creativity in others has always been something I strive to do!

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Let's Send the Villain Cast on an Adventure!

(Featuring the Canon cast because the idea made me chuckle)

Canon!Pomni, digging her fingers into her seat: WHY ARE WE GOING SO FAST?!

Villain!Pomni: Because violence isn't fun when it's slow!

Villain!Ragatha: It's also not fun when I can't get a good aim on the target! TELL YOUR STUPID HUSBAND TO SLOW DOWN!

Villain!Jax: Why don't YOU learn how to use a weapon that wasn't made for close combat?!

Canon!Jax: He makes a pretty good point. *Yelps as Villain!Ragatha Launches a Dagger at His Head* I stand by my words!

Canon!Ragatha, trying not to fall: AAAAHHH! THIS IS THE CANDY KINGDOM ADVENTURE ALL OVER AGAIN!

Villain!Gangle: *Sobbing Violently* Why do we have to be so horrible?!

Villain!Ragatha, dodging gunfire: SHUT UP! YOU MURDERED YOUR OWN HUSBAND!

Canon!Gangle: You did WHAT?!

Villain!Gangle: It was self defense!

Villain!Jax: Suuuuure it was!

Canon!Kinger: This is a nice trip.

Villain!Kinger: *Tweaking Out and Babbling Incoherently*

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

Let Me Feed the Hungries!

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Kinger

He's been in the Circus the longest; not much is known about his misdeeds other than some info the others have pieced together through his muttering. According to the man, whose mind is near completely gone, he: "Left a bloody mess of the children that the wife would certainly not appreciate."

Fun Fact: His supposed sins seem to draw him closer to Pomni, who welcomes the overbearing and often downright dangerous behavior happily, much to her husband's dismay.

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Ragatha

A warrant for her arrest had been put out after she stabbed a random man for no reason. She spent most of her days in the real world taking on jobs as a hitwoman, and was knocked out after making a deal and attempting to perform a hit on the wrong person. She woke up in the Circus and instantly put every guard up she could. Everyone has deemed Ragatha dangerous, but fairly amicable when she doesn't absolutely hate you (which is quite often). No one likes to be alone with her, as they've all seen what she's done to the dolls in her room.

Fun Fact: Ragatha carries a dagger around with her everywhere, hiding it either in her hair or under her dress "Just in case".

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Jax

Felony Tax Evasion turned into Assault on an Officer With a Deadly Weapon after he was visited by an undercover cop. He used a brick to knock the cop out and shot all the bullets in the cop's gun into his ceiling. Afterwards he ran off, changed his name, and went along with a strange experiment the company he was working for pitched. He was promised a generous amount of money should he prove the experimental program successful, and woke up in the Circus with an "Ah, d[!%$&] it."

Fun Fact: Jax is obsessed with firearms and advanced weaponry, so much so that he will occasionally nab pieces from adventures so he can build random weapons and cause havoc for no reason.

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Gangle

Killed her husband and immediately confessed to it when confronted. She was set to be killed via lethal injection, but when she was strapped to the table, the doctors placed a headset onto her instead of injecting her. When she woke up, Gangle instantly broke down, begging for sympathy from anyone and crying harder when everyone just... watched her.

Fun Fact: Gangle is one of if not THE only person in the Circus who still has a bit of humanity. She's tried to engage in conversation with the others about normal day-to-day things, but is always met with weird stares.

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Zooble

They ordered a sandwich that turned out to be poisoned. After getting their stomach pumped, they found the sandwich maker and set them on fire. During the police interview they were told to put a headset on as an experimental alternative to a lie detector test, and woke up in the Circus with very little reaction. "Better than jail, honestly."

Fun Fact: Zooble chooses to stay out of the situations the others get into, mainly because they know they'll get too violent and don't want to be seen as anyone but the "They're just here for the vibes" person.

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Pomni

Was a family therapist in her real life that was fired after telling someone "Arson is okay as long as you clean up well afterwards." She saw the termination as a challenge and set the department ablaze, staying at the scene even as authorities arrived. During her investigation, she admitted to multiple other crimes she’d committed "Because I've got nothing else to talk about." She was put in a similar scenario as Gangle, though, unlike Gangle, Pomni immediately decided to try and pick away at everyone's brains; this has earned her multiple stab wounds from Ragatha, uncontrollable sobbing from Gangle, uncomfortable glares from Zooble, intense staring from Kinger, and a husband of Jax.

Fun Fact: Pomni gets bored easily, and starts shaking like a cold chihuahua when she needs an outlet, whether that be committing crimes with her husband (Jax) on adventures, or casually convincing her husband to have sex in random places (they've been caught multiple times, but only Kinger seems to be outraged by their relationship).

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Caine and Bubble

Caine and Bubble were created to keep every criminal that arrives in check. He's neurotic and makes the adventures incredibly dangerous with the hopes that someone will die by his own hand, the exact opposite of what his programming tells him to do. Bubble, in turn, is there to consistently remind Caine that "If they die, who will make things fun?"

Fun Fact: Caine and Bubble are a sort of "Two Sides of the Same Coin" duo; Caine being the violent side, and Bubble being his calming opposite. Oh, and they both helped officiate Jax and Pomni’s wedding (it wasn't supposed to be allowed, but Caine wanted to see how far his cast members were willing to take this little marriage game).

[how-to-train-your-pomni]

More Villain!TADC Because Spicy Noodles

Context: The Canon cast got spit out into this universe (similar to my PA!AU scenario) and everyone's talking over a nice (totally not poisoned) dinner

Canon!Jax: So, what? You guys are just the evil wannabe versions of us?

Villain!Pomni, squishing Canon!Ragatha’s Cheeks: Oh, you are so cute! Squishy and malleable- Maybe I can sew a new dress onto you...

Villain!Ragatha: *Throws a Dagger Past Villain!Pomni’s Head and Glares*

Villain!Pomni: *Sighs Dramatically* Okay, I'm bored. I'm going to find Caine and force him to send us bank robbing!

Villain!Jax: You do that, baby! Make that floating pair of dentures regret being born!

Canon!Jax: Wait, what did you just call her???

Canon!Gangle, flabbergasted: Are you two dating?!

Villain!Jax: What? No! We're- *Turns to Villain!Kinger, Who is Holding a Loaded Shotgun at Villain!Jax* OUR MARRIAGE WAS OFFICIATED, OLD MAN!

Canon!Kinger and Canon!Pomni: MARRIAGE?!

Canon!Jax: *Gags* I'm gonna be sick...

Canon!Zooble: You and me both.

Villain!Zooble: God, where is Pomni with that STUPID AI?!

Canon!Gangle: She only left ten seconds ago...

Canon!Ragatha: Why is Caine always doing this to us?!