#THE BAD THING IN MY HEAD I CANT STOP IT | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ark-fork · 1 year ago

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@starryyskies

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#ark draw #tadc #the amazing digital circus #tadc au #pomni #caine #THE BAD THING IN MY HEAD I CANT STOP IT

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xxplastic-cubexx · 2 months ago

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secret wars secret love you will ALWAYS be famous

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#xmen #xmen comics #cherik #charles xavier #erik lehnsherr #professor x #magneto #snap sketches #//draws eriks weird reindeer thing differently to make this pose work// vjELAKVJEALKJV #maybe ill stick to this but i kinda like the 'barricade' vibe of the other option but anyway #mom said its MY turn to reference the famous bridal carry panel #this was supposed to be a quick warm up but as i was lining things my hand started to tremble really bad #i dont know why ??????????????? thats never happened before and my hand's perfectly fine and normal now #like my hands tremble a little from time to time but nothing ever detrimental #the trembling i had today was ACTUALLY crazy bad. had me concerned but i was also able to still draw so not that bad ig #ANYWAYS. yeah <3 i wanted to reference tha panel we all love ......#i draw this mfer carrying his mfer so much i fear i cant be stopped. charles is a princess who needs to be princess carried #i usually draw it like. An Actual Block or whatever but its flatter ... so charles may rest his weary head ...#i did draw charles getting a handful. its what he deserves. its also what i deserve but i cant have that now can i #erik living my dream too tho ..... life is so unfair i wanna carry charles xavier and kiss his head this life SUCKS #slowly being able to feed my cherik fix again we're Semi back. once i finish my work for once THEN we'll be so fuckin back jWRKLJLAKF #ok thats all from me bye bye

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ganondoodle · 1 month ago

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theres people that build the entire map of botw in fucking minecraft and im sitting here for the 100th time within less than a year crying bc i cant draw a line how i want

#ganondoodles talks #and yet i have more and more in my head #i keep thinking of more and more things i want to draw and show and it keeps piling up #i have always been drawing “at a loss” bc my body is fundamentally unable to keep up with my head #so theres tons of things that just kind of died bc i couldnt get them on paper fast enough #but now it feels even worse #bc i cant get anything out #its not like a clogged drain that drains like half a liter over 5 hours like it used to #its fully clogged but the tap is turned way up so its just getting more and more and nothing gets through #and im tied to a post forced to watch as it rises and spills not able to do anything about it #its so dumb #i know i have enough skill to do the shit i want to do right now #but it just blocked- unavaible- paywalled perhaps but who do i pay and with what #all that is already bad enough but i also have to feel really stupid about it #stairs i have walked up before but now im just standing in front yelling and crying #getting invisible walled by myself but also dont know how to get rid of it or cheat it- which is stupid #shouldnt i know how to get through??????????? yes. yes i should.#maybe i should just not allow myself to even open the browser at all so i can at least stop making these posts #better for everyone probably

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eikichi-supremacy · 11 months ago

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If nothing else Koenma is a Kuwabara stan and I'm right there with him o7 (I need to write the kuwameshi fic that goes with this fr)

#maybe one day i'll write that au i have sitting in my head #ever since the comment he made about making kuwa spirit detective instead ive been thinking about it #like...what if yusuke is still recruited same as canon but like #kuwa was already spirit detective? doing assignments for the guys upstairs and all #and they made yusuke help him after his resurrection instead of going solo #and it's hilarious because they still have the ''rivalry'' set in place so it's like #now i gotta be coworkers with this guy i was in a fist fight with last week?#yusuke is like you can't be serious you want me to fight DEMONS with the guy who cant even beat ME? lmaooo okay #kuwa would be more in tune with his powers atp in this au and super offended like hello #why would i use my reiki on a FELLOW HUMAN CHILD you DICK i can hold my own on my assignments just fine #but he's actually really excited to be able to spend time with yusuke doing something besides getting his ass handed to him #they're both genkai's students (she's endlessly annoyed but they grow on her)#i just think it'd be fun cos like #it'd be harder to exclude kazuma from shit if he's literally been involved in this shit before he even met #kurama and hiei #kuwabara isn't really told about yusuke's resurrection so things go mostly the same up til he's brought back #they're both called to koenma's office and it's the spiderman pointing meme 💀#it's koenma's first time seeing kuwa in person as he usually just sends assignments with botan #yusuke has already seen him cos of the resurrection arc #and koenma is SUCH a fanboy ''kuwabara it's such a pleasure. you know you're my best worker 🥺''#''um urameshi am i seeing things or is that a fuckin baby'' yusuke will NOT stop laughing #it fucks koenma up so bad he makes sure he's in his adult form when he's around kuwa next #cos he wants to be the respected boss but also guy that you can chill with!! he's so cringe #okay yeah i need to write this it's such a fun concept #kuwameshi #yu yu hakusho #kuwabara kazuma #yusuke urameshi #koenma

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klayfruit · 11 days ago

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hi i really hope this doesnt come off as like. Ohh theres rtvs drama i need to add MORE and show these guys need to be Cancelled!!!! boiling down the crew’s immature response to being criticized as racist as just, Drama and controversy, is really shitty. what i wanna say next is just something completely unrelated to that, i just felt more Encouraged to say it at this time because i feel less afraid that im gonna get called silly for it.

ok so my main point is, i am concerned with how often rtvs (mostly specifically wayne, i cant recall anyone else in rtvs doing this) still uses ai in their stuff. by this i’m talking about the recent-ish novelai stream and to an extent the songs in the bbvr stream. i absolutely love the bbvr stream and i do appreciate what wayne’s said about the songs themselves, that theyre more comedic than meant to be Actual Art—same with whatever novelai writes being nothing but comedic and not actual art—and i agree with that partially. ai Can be funny as fuck in a very specific kind of uncanny and disgusting way that cant really be achieved by humans. but, by using that ai to create jokey stuff, you are still feeding the ai to be used by people that are genuinely serious about using ai. and whats most important to me is the environmental damage that comes with using ai, which i have not seen anyone in rtvs mention at all.

one thing thats kind of made me scared to talk about this is when i mentioned this on twitter (though admittedly i brought it up in a very Dumb way, it was me being afraid that scorpy’s section in the pizza tower stream was written by ai bc it just felt really convincingly nonsensical in the same way ai writes stuff, but now i know i was just Straight up wrong thats just how scorpy writes), scorpy qrted me without really addressing my concern and led to lots of people in my replies. again, what i was concerned with really Wasn’t as major as i was worried it was + my response to it was silly because i wasnt expecting so many eyes on a tweet i made just for my followers, but it would have seemed a lot better to talk to me directly about this instead of not even giving me a solid answer.

i am a minor so i cant go into wayne’s discord to talk about this/look at discussion (and i hope me being A Minor doesnt also diminish my opinion as well), so i’m sorry if im regurgitating stuff thats already been talked about by the crew!

#rtvs #txt #+ if anyone on the crew sees this and wants to respond please do it in the replies or my dms #and not by reblogging bc again i would like for Not thousands of eyes to be on me!!#Also another thing completely offtopic baaulp scares me. I dont know why i dont have like Any solid #- proof of why. Just everytime he speaks i feel like hes gonna say something extremely uncomfortable and bad #actually no wait i do have reasons i just cant list 99% of them off the top of my head. one thing though #He kept on making epstein jokes during the pizza tower collab i was like. can he stop that. weird and not good i think

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cepheusgalaxy · 2 months ago

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That episode wouldve been perfect if the pacing was a liiiitle bit slower

#look i liked it i loved it i think there was a lot of dear work put in it it was genuinely a very cool episode and all #BUT i cant get it outta my head since j watched it that it was so QUICK #i know they had to fit it all in 20 minutes or so #but it was SO rushed to me #the first part was okay #and then we move to court and it was a biit fast and i have not processed what happening yet #we dwell a bit on the court thing so by now my emotions have properly landed #although i still wish it was a little longer #and then BAM blitz being executed that part is pretty cool #but the part where he sacrifices himself also let me wishing for a longer time #although i they probably did the best on that one #and then stolas arrives and starts singing out of the blue #which okay fair thats the point he jumps to singing #but i really wish they took a bit longer on A. him stopping the axe and B. he taking in all of the situation and trying to clear things up #and THEN starting his song #the song was *also* a bit quick to me and the transitions from one layer to the other felt a bit rushed #but who am i to tell the music professionals how to music #i mean i as the audience kind of can. but i feel like its not rlly that bad or anything its just that the WHOLE episode passed in a blink #didnt give time for my emotions to keep up with everything #helluva boss #helluva boss spoilers #helluva boss s2 #helluva boss mastermind #mastermind #hb spoilers

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telesodalite · 2 months ago

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I need to be weirder about the scavengers and cannibalism...

#its been a long day... but im feeling better now. (thanks for the well wishes and such btw <3-)#(-sending my well wishes in return by tenfold bcs. damn. it seems stuff is really going around rn)#but yeah... just. augh. theres just smth about how the scavs sorta translate into more like. thriller-esque genres pretty well?#like. i feel somehow those themes compliment their characteristics? or could compliment their characteristics in a more rounded out way #sure. theyre generally a light hearted romp of absurdity with occasional themes of a not good not bad handling of 'mental health matters'#but they just really shine a bit in horrific circumstances. esp with the sort of absurdity they bring to the table #theyre odd people. even in the context of their generally weird and alien universe. and that right there feels like a trove of potential #its like. ok. the lost light crew? also odd. but thats a huge ship. full of people and variety and a sense of purpose and normalcy post-war #(normalcy being. whatever all those background folks were getting up too while plot happened around them. cruise ship stuff ig)#but in contrast. with the w.a.p crew. its an ark class ship with like. a handful of people. and a whole lot of junk and free time #both just cruising through space endlessly for years. one with hundreds of people. and one with like 6 people.#so both are technically isolated when theyre not making pit-stops planet or station side. but again. 100s vs 6 dudes.#think. top of the line cruise ship from hell with a small town sized populace vs a big shitty boat and 6 starving guys #both have the capacity to become case studies in madness. both could do really well thriller wise. but the scavs being a smaller group?#it only being the 6 of them emphasis the isolation perhaps. less variety. less change. same 6 people for 5(?) years #things could get weird fast. codependent mentalities. us vs them mindsets. an otherness about everyone else outside of their group #and then! then you add to the mix the fact that theyre eating/drinking from corpses?! *chefs kiss* awesome. love it.#non-stationary isolation + cannibalism. ough. perfect mix. a classic of maritime horror but in space! :D!#a big ship. small crew. living while knowing that as soon as you kick the bucket. your body is the meal. your body is the fuel.#no decorum about it. no faith. no belief. just perverse survival. bcs they might enjoy it. a bloody gluttony. with a bite. a sample. a taste #it takes seeing your buddy as a walking talking burger to another level. bcs every corpse you come across is also a burger. and a gas can #also fulcrum making candy out of corpses is so. particularly perfect when it comes to the horrifically absurd. just. smth about it. idk #but also also. the line. where was the line drawn for each of them? and when did they each cross it?#most of them dont seem like the type to jump head first into that. so how did they justify it to themselves? had they done it before?#and then. when did it become normal? a habit? smth enjoyable?#i might be running out of tags. but yeah. them being weirder. esp about each other and others.#nothing brings a group of people together like the overhanging knowledge that you sort of kinda wanna eat each other #(rlly wishing i could stomach realistic thrillers rn. but i just cant. gotta stick to written or artistic styles or risk panic attacks :/)#(ive tried a couple movies and shows now. and cant get through most of them. praise be synopses and peoples long rambles about them tho :D)#(nothing like reading someones passionate ramble about the meaning/symbolism of some gory nightmare without having to actually see it lol)

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ilynpilled · 6 months ago

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i really do need some of u to understand that no matter how much effort you put into giving certain ppl evidence about why they are wrong about something about these books it is ultimately a waste of energy bc they do not want to have their mind changed to begin with is the thing like truly free urself there is legitimately zero gained from any of this they would rather kill themselves than admit that they were incorrect or whatever lmaoo

#it happened to me twice in my life and it was hilarious both times it is legit someone just puts their head in the sand #this sign cant stop me bc i cant read #and thats bc they dont really care like their opinion isnt really bc of a genuine analysis of these things they dgaf #like it isnt about caring about this stupid story its about being right 😭#sometimes u just have to take ppl in bad faith and not frustrate urself

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moeblob · 11 months ago

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Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

#my characters #waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit #deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee #and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name #deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c #man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while #he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair #ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so #its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons #but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me #and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not #fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew #and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable #while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts #and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed #so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en #so you know maybe its that idk #and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now #and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it #and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad #that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal #and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it #the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer #anyway story time in the tags again #im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note #its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him #he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times #and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea #and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you

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ourladyoftheflytrap · 16 days ago

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My mom always complaining about how I never spend time with her.... ma'am the last time we had a serious conversation you told me you thought i was making traumatic memories of my childhood up just to demonize you

#i straight up asked her ''do you really think im a liar? do you think you raised me to be a liar?'' and she said ''yeah i guess so'' 😭#literally would rather live in fantasy land than have a conversation where she takes accountability for hurting me #its always bc she had a hard life and couldve made mine harder and everything im upset about is because of a man #aint no man tried to drag me by my hair out of the room because i refused to stop talking about how uncomfortable i was with a violent man #moving in! nuh uh girl that was YOU. and aint no man busted down my door on multiple occasions to beat my ass for #*checks notes* not wanting to continue an emotional conversation after i had already started crying and wasnt able to communicate #no sir that was YOU. that was all you and aint no man was even in the house during those times #and definitely no man ever told me that i was manipulating you and being selfish for telling you that letting a man move back in after he #broke into our house and attacked you made me feel unsafe and made my life worse.#no man brought up how traumatizing ur childhood was and then threatened to send me to live with ur rapist daddy #when i said id like to spend the summer with my dad if my only alternative was living with you and a man who threw knives at your head #and tried to strangle you several times #no man fucking did those things to me. no man ever told me i wasnt allowed to be traumatized by his violent behavior bc he had it worse as a #kid. YOU said that to me. many times. every time i ever brought up my pain to you. and you still fucking do that #you sprayed windex into your mothers eyes when you were 23 during a fight but if i start yelling after you push me to talk to u #and then insult me when im honest then suddenly its ''i Never acted as bad as you did and my parents were so much worse''#no. i fucking remember girl. i was alive for that. you were a nightmare and your parents deserved it #but you werent always a peach to me and when i talk about that its not an insult its the fucking truth #and i cant come to meet you where youre at because youre no longer in the thick of a traumatic and dangerous situation #you and your man are settled down and u felt safe enough to marry him and you run the house and earn all the money #and you've done a lot of work to heal yourself and be better but that man and i had to meet you were you were at when you were at your worst #in order for you to feel safe and secure enough to start that process. and now this is Not me at my worse #i shielded and protected you from my very worst because i always felt like if you saw your kid coming undone it would hurt you #but if you cant even meet me in the middle now then we cant have the relationship you want. it would be a lie #it would be a lie and it would be a betrayal of myself. bc i cant be honest with you right now #every time i try you take it personally and we get into a fight. so dont act like my distance and privacy #is some sort of slight against you or a punishment. i am trying to keep the peace

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pyrefection · 1 year ago

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everyone meet Little Prince

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unexpectedbrickattack · 2 years ago

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#chattin #nothing bad or spicy i just feel like peep peeping rn #📢🐀!#but there is talk of panic attacks and Bad Stims up ahead (not related to me dw) ->#i was thinking of autistic peppino bc i am planning out the vigilante comic in my head #and like the quick premise is that vigilante comes into the pizzeria and shoots a blank into the ceiling to get everyone to shut up #and quiet down so he can go ask for (demand really) to see peppino bc this fuckerhas a bounty FOR A REASON and hes here to find out why #bc u know; cowboy yeehaw shenanigans #only its like 5am and no one is there jdkdndjdndk he just saw the lights one and went BANGBANG #anyway peppino is in the back cowering bc someone came into his fucking shop and started shooting UNPROMPTED #and hes so fucking scared and unwilling to move and when he sees someone actually come through the back door he starts having a legitimate-#-panic attack and he starts doing the stimmy hands thing over his ducked head #and vigilante is like whoa whoa WHOA WHOA HOL UP WHATS HAPPENIN #like i dont think peppino has ‘happy stims’ he has ‘extremely self soothing’ stims #that include flapping but only if hes so unbelievably stressed that he cant think #or he has more violent ones like pulling at his hair and biting his hands #that on top of like a genuine panic attack where he cant breathe and he thinks his heart is stopping is 😵‍💫#vigilante is like christ almighty what the fucks got you so damned spooked?? like he doesnt even think of the blank he shot #he assumed someone came in before him or something #and hes like oh shit wait thats mE I DID THAT I SCARED HIM #i am still planning it out but yes. autistic peppino is on my mind 😊#in a more positive light hes very earnest; and good at his job bc cooking in an interest of his #and his responses in social situations are bizarre enough sometimes to wrap back around to endearing #also its an excuse to draw peppino looking very confused but happy and gustavo somewhere in the shot going-#‘the bad bitch i pulled in by being autistic’#swag #ALSO THE TAG IS BACK so i guess i can doodle again heehee

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clawsextended · 2 months ago

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today was my first christmas without my aunt. today was my first christmas i’ve ever woken up alone. why does grief have to feel so hollow and so heavy at once.

#ooc. o kaptain.#[I cant stop thinking about how last year was the last christmas we would ever have together. it keeps hitting me. I’ve tried my best never #ever to take a moment for granted but this hurts more than I can explain. this has been the worst year of my life. I’m absolutely shattered.#last year I was thinking about how lucky I was to still live with my parent. last year I was literally just appreciating the fact that I #even had the opportunity. I miss her so much it’s immeasurable. I would take back anything if I could. any fucking thing. I would use the #talk to me hand and I can say that without hesitation. judge me for it. I’m gonna go write because i have to do… something.#can’t believe I’ve been sick for like three days. today just… didn’t matter. not because I didn’t want it to. but largely because I didn’t #even have the energy to be present and I’m ALSO horribly congested. and like… who cares? I’m an abstraction of a concept. I’m gonna make a #bad decision and go play marvel rivals while I write shit on mobile. I’m physically completely exhausted and I actually can’t explain where #my head is at. which means I’m just gonna play iron fist like all the way thru.]#death /#family death /#parental death /#CLAWS RETRACTED.

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mypeggableromance · 4 months ago

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#hhhhh I'll probably delete this later but if i don't physically put these thoughts somewhere I'll maybe explode.#but fuck man. shit sucks fr! I highkey think I can't go to work tomorrow but yknow how it goes!!!!#I'm caught somewhere between finally being taken seriously about my health issues #and having the most wretched mental health crisis #like on one hand fantastic! I'm being taken seriously now its gotten to the point where I cant fucking walk normally #but on the other hand oh my god holy shit. i had to get this bad???? and I'm worried. i know theres shit so much bigger than me rn going on #but I'm worried about my health. especially when I've been trying to deal with it for the better part of like.... 5 years #since i was 19!!!!#I'm 24 and worrying about whether or not I'll actually walk about with 0 pain ever again isn't that fucked.#so that's bittersweet. ive got physio tomorrow. blood tests next week #an ultrasound coming up #its ultimately a good thing im being taken seriously. if not a terrifying acceptance that everything ive been feeling has been real and #well. bad.#and like with this right is the crash of my mental health. just a fuckin nosedive man.#i have a relatively stressful job i felt out of my depth about and thus guilty for but now its a role that I've approached in constant pain #for the last few months.#i can't deal with that actually! lots of stress! lots of pain! lots of mental pain over my physical condition! my job grinding my soul!#aaaaa!!!!!!!#like i dont WANT to be unemployed either #I'd much rather be uhhhh employed! and able to save money towards actually getting Help™#but I've got to admit that i hurt too much. and its consuming my whole fucking brain.#but I'll go on #ive got my first trip out the country solo next week!! im heading to san Fransisco!!! im excited.#but I'm worried for the inevitable moment where my pains catch up with me #ill surpress it while I'm out there. try and remind myself to have a good time. return to the uk and feel a weeks worth of pain #and even THAT sucks to consider #but i should stop #rambles

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thebyter · 2 months ago

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i read this one uu fic where ash knows tht spoke is spoke inthe mafia episode and its lkke him giving spoke a ceremony outfit and its kinda gay with all of the caressing and shit but idk if i like them that way Id prefer to see them in a toxic platonic way but the author might make them kiss if they make a sequel but ill pretend that its a cheek kiss instead if they do

#its a shame cuz its my fav fic so far #but if they do oh well I wont complain i wont be mean it might be kinda weird cuz spoke is 17 inthink Oh wow hes a year older tha me thats #crazy ngl not sure how to process that but #I really liked the fic because it was so good in making ash manipulative but also I dont have much to complain over #I wouldve said that spokes too dumbed down in the fic but hes stupid in uu #well not stupid I need to stop using that word so freely its moreso uhrr #He struggles with making decisions quickly and processing things and that causes people(ash) to take advantage of him #in ls hes the leader in uu he follows #really visible with him and mapicc 'Follow me me me!' 'Lets go go go!'#I do love the fic a lot I really want to see how the ceremony would play out #because ashalso fkrced spoke to drink aglass of milk and told him not to go invis and i assume theres gonna be multiple invis players #which would be reallyyyy interesting #Lkke the guy with the biggest mark on his head is getting a ceremony. something no other diamond player has got. this guy that everyone has #been told to kill on sight is rigth next to ash sorta like a right hand man situation but he doesn't have a say in anything it kinda plays #more into spoke being some sort of thropy but i dont want to objectify him in my mind cuz thats ickyyyyy #ash : I cant stop winning #!#I want to see ash make spoke come with him when hes taunting parrot loke inthe recent uu episode #I reallly loved that #I might become an uu ash fan but In our system we have a uu mapicc (named mape cuz we got 2 mapiccs) So When he finds out i like ash #hes gonna get mad but like I dont support his actions theyre clearly bad and flawed and evil like ls wemmbu but i csnt bring myself but to #like them #I say as I remember the evil alter forming sensation in my brain #We already got ls wemmbu Dont tell me were gonna get uu ash inhere too #Ohhh god this is gonna be so fucking bad #text

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phagodyke · 9 months ago

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dating an art student was so crazy I'm just thinking abt that one birthday I had where my ex got me stickers from the etsy of the person they were cheating on me with....

#they made them address the thank you note to me and everything ajskfjfkfb. i didnt know they were cheating at the time but wow...#every time i break out my sticker collection and see them im reminded of it. but i cant throw out the stickers theyre deltarune ones 😭#like they were a rly cool artist.... just unfortunate that happened 💀#the drama was insane. my ex only wanted to sleep with them but they (other person) wanted them to break up with me so they could date #but my ex dumped them rly harshly for suggesting that i guess 'romantic' cheating was a step too far even for them lmaooo #i heard abt their breakup secondhand and god could they be cruel sometimes. they made fun of the sex theyd had w them #to all their mutual friends n everything i actually felt so bad for the other person when i found out. at least our breakup wasnt that bad #i only finally got that cruel side of them directed towards me like a year after when they wanted us to stop being friends #but yeah. its also funny in a way bc my ex only suggested i had adhd bc the other person did too + struggled a lot with rsd #which i guess they found out when they broke up with them. and then looked at that and thought huh my gf is kind of similar...#and this was like. 2 years before i even considered i had adhd myself and sought diagnosis ahdkfidjcjdjfjfjfkdbfnf #this made me go look the other persons art page up on instagram + then i recognised some of their friends/flatmates art pages and i found #their (my exs that is) grad year film which is still being shown at animation festivals... good for them good for them #i dont think they have an art page themselves tho cuz they were always v shy and weird abt sharing art on social media #like everyone else except them is tagged on things... shame i wouldve liked to see what they were making now. even if we're not friends #also one of their old roommates made some REALLY similar squid game fanart to mine like a month after i posted it huh..#not mad abt it or anything i think its cool i just didnt realise they showed my art to their friends. thats cute #ah this was years ago anyway. getting my head out of the rabbit hole #im gonna go play some elden ring and then maybe do smth fun in my sketchbook we shall seeee #.diaries

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