#THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK THIS WAS FUN TO PONDER

[kuurechr]

Satoru barged into your dorm, no warning ahead of time, so he was surprised to see Shoko on your bed, slathering a face mask on you, as Nanami sat with his back against the bed, on the floor reading as his face mask was drying on his face.

"You guys are having a fun night without me?!" Satoru exclaimed, feigning pain as he held onto his heart. "I thought you were my best friends?"

"Who told you that?" Nanami grumbled, before looking over at you. "Where's Ijichi? He's late, is he on a mission?"

"Ijichi isn't going on missions anymore, I told him not to," Satoru said, sliding next to Nanami, looking over his shoulder to see what he was reading.

Nanami shut his book. "Why would you do that?"

"What're you reading, porn?" Satoru said with a scowl, as Nanami put his book away.

"Answer the question Satoru," you chided, reaching over to your dresser to take out a sheet mask for Shoko.

"He'd die out on missions. He's better off as an assistant."

"Why would you do that to him?" Shoko asked. "He'd already barely gone out on missions last year."

"Duh," Satoru mocked. "Because he'd die if he went out on a mission for a curse higher than a fourth grade. You guys know I'm right."

You huffed. "Yeah, that's probably what's best for him, but you probably didn't put it very nicely."

Satoru shrugged, evading the accusation. "He's probably stuck doing paperwork. Which means there's room for one more today!"

"There's room for you any day," you reminded him. "However, you're rarely here. And I thought you were dealing with a special grade today."

"It was a first grade," Satoru huffed. "But it was in the North Pole, so that slowed me down a bit. It's really cold there, you know?"

"Sometimes I forget you didn't get elementary level schooling," Nanami deadpanned.

"And yet somehow he's about to be a parent," Shoko commented. "How's the adoption process going?"

"Yaga's dealing with most of it," Satoru answered, leaning his head back. "I don't even know if I'll have time to properly take care of them. They're like 6 and 7? They can function pretty well on their own by then, right?"

Everyone in the room instantly glared at Satoru, and he put his hands up in defence. "Okay, okay, I know, I was kidding. You guys think so little of me. But seriously you all better be good at babysitting, especially at random hours."

"Well, you're doing a good thing," you reassured him. "So of course, everyone's open to help." Satoru thanked you, genuinely sincere before quickly switching up and teasing Nanami for what he was reading. As the two argued, Shoko closed her eyes, falling back on your bed, and it made you think.

"Hey guys?" Shoko opened her eyes, looking over at you. The boys both turned their heads to look at you, clearly pondering something. "What are you planning on doing? After you graduate. And for a while after that?"

"What's bringing that question on?" Shoko asked.

"I mean, I don't know. Obviously the adopting part is going to be a big part of it. But what are we going to do?"

"I mean, there's not many options for a jujutsu sorcerer," Satoru reasoned. "I'll just keep going on missions as I'm assigned to them. That should keep me busy till I'm old. Shoko, you're a bit different right? You're too useful to leave as an assistant but your cursed technique doesn't really put you in a fighting stance."

"Yeah you're right," Shoko agreed. "Yaga talked to me about it back when I first got scouted, actually. I'll become a school doctor. I want to get my license first though. Y/N, you're continuing taking missions?"

"Yeah, of course," you answered. "Nanami, you too?"

"I don't know," Nanami scratched the back of his head. "Sometimes I feel like I'm going to quit. This sorcery shit is exhausting. And I've only been at it for three years. How did the two of you survive for this long?"

"Well I wasn't fighting curses at age 3."

"I was." You all glared at Satoru again. "What?! I'm Gojou Satoru! Of course I was kicking curses asses!"

"Alright well, back to the kids," you said. "You've met them, right? I'm sure they're gonna be hard to get along with at first; they've been through a lot, right? God, where were they even living before? What's wrong with Toji, how could he just completely ditch them?!"

Satoru placed a hand on your calf. "Alright, don't freak out. They live in this really crappy apartment. Apparently, they left them enough money for that. But the older girl did all the chores, and helped Megumi with it. Megumi collected water from places he'd found clean water, apparently, because they couldn't pay their water bill. And the lights don't work, so I'm guessing it will freeze or burn depending on the weather. We got them out of there immediately though. They're staying with Yaga right now."

"Why can't Yaga continue to do that?" Nanami asked. "Why does it have to be you who takes them in?"

"It doesn't have to be me," Satoru answered. "It's my choice. They're with us because it was my decision. So it should be my responsibility to make sure they're okay."

Nanami nodded. Shoko chuckled. "I'm surprised Satoru. You're sounding like a good person."

"I'm going to rip that mask off your face."

"Now that sounds like Sato-! No, wait, I have five more minutes!"

[apple-onigiri]

oh i've got a headcanon! for post canon i think it would be very cute if siffrin were to teach bonnie how to sail once they were old enough, maybe doing it along with petronille :) coastal kid moment!

ohhh because they knew how to sail even when they were younger, back when the island disappeared!! that's such a sweet idea ahhhh i love that :(

i can imagine it being something that might jog siffrin's memory a bit - it being something typically done on the island, on the account of it being,, uh, an island - and he might remember, at least briefly, being taught how to sail himself

i can imagine bonnie being sooo excited to learn something new, that kid is Hungry for new practical skills they can use to help out

and!! if nille is also there as you say, it opens up a very fun avenue for her and siffrin to bond - which i often think about! it's cool to ponder how building trust between two individuals who are described as pretty jumpy and potentially wary of new people but who still care for the same kid so so much would go. so much to think about!!! nille supremacy, i should both talk and think about her more

thank you so much for this ask!! paints an incredible picture. makes me sad. 10/10 post-canon content

[definitely-not-iorveth]

Can you talk more about Chase having ADHD?

OH MAN I CAN AND I WILL

granted i was half-serious when i made that post AND bear in mind that i've only seen a little over a couple seasons so far. everything i will say here can certainly be disputed and attributed to other factors.

however.

i do believe that an argument for this reading can be made.

now what made me say that in the first place: chase is always fidgeting. constantly.

he's twitching, spinning his pen, tapping his leg, doing silly little things like this:

during work meetings.

and to be honest. that's enough for me. i claim this man for adhd and you cannot stop me.

but thinking about it, this is not the only thing. so, here's some more evidence to back up my claim:

you ever notice how chase is the first to go along with house's insanity? how he doesn't really seem to mind? people with adhd thrive in chaotic environments.

chase is often referred to as stupid when contrasted with his fellows. but is he really? he is meek at first, doesn't seem to have much to contribute if anything at all. when he does have ideas, though, they are often impulsive, wild and outlandish (and does that remind you of anybody?), which makes me think that his unwillingness to speak might be learned. "my ideas will be frowned upon and punished, so maybe instead of voicing them, it's better to stay quiet and play stupid" is something many people with adhd are forced to internalized.

the fucking. angiogram on the wrong leg.

so, yeah.

[midnight-mourning]

do you have a kofi? 👀

just wondering hehehehe

At this point in time I do not!

I've thought about commission-based things in the past, but it's still something I'm debating on just because it opens up a whole different side to writing I'm unsure on atm

I also have several wips that I worry would get pushed to the side if I did comissions so if I do end up doing it, I'm guessing it would be several months or so down the road from now

i also worry about the quality of my writing in relation to that being something people paid for, even as just a side thing to my normal posts (which it would be ofc)

But anywho, to shorten all that down, no, but maybe someday!

[okiria]

ehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehe

🍋🥕🍆 for tart

🥑🫒🍒 for dehya

🍌🍏🍠 for sougo

🥔🌶️🥝 for jane. because yes her too.

hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

got a selfship final exam in my inbox, i hope i do you proud professor selfship 🫡

Section One: Tartaglia (just as a little warning if anyone needs it, i vaguely reference ptsd in this section)

🍋 - if your f/o could change one thing about themselves, what would they change and why?

i'm often very haunted by teucer sharing that tartaglia said he dreams of quitting his job to travel the world. sometimes i wonder if, behind the pride and ambition within being a harbinger, something in him wishes he was something his family could be proud of. maybe deep down he doesn't like the battle maniac he's become. so much of his actions and obsessions to me read as a trauma response, and i wonder if sometimes he wishes he hadn't fallen into the abyss.

but that would be weakness talking, wouldn't it? he's strong now and he has to become stronger. so he shakes it off and reminds himself of his ambitions. he says to himself, with confidence, that the only thing he'd change is that he were stronger.

🥕 - when your f/o was little, did they dislike vegetables? do they still dislike them?

considering he claims he has "no food he dislikes" because "a soldier can't be picky", it would be REALLY fucking funny if he used to be a picky eater or dislike veggies. wouldn't be surprised if a young tartaglia only indulged in things he liked and pushed others around the plate. he probably still holds his breath when eating certain veggies but he has to set a good example.

🍆 - does your f/o have a favorite scent? why is it their favorite? do they have a least favorite scent?

he adores the smell of skunk, it reminds him of the hunt /ref

in all seriousness i think he would like various "wood" smells. things that remind him of the walls of his home, of the aroma that pops out when chopping and burning firewood, of a hand carved matryoshka doll he'd turn over and over in his hands when he was younger.

as for least favorite smells... i would use this as an opportunity to once again talk about him having ptsd, but he has such a warped idea of "adrenaline good" that if he was triggered by a scent, he'd be like "wow this is so empowering" (get help, girl)

Section Two: Dehya

🥑 - is there any niche topics your f/o is interested in? what are they and why do they like them?

i think about how dehya was curious about the "library book" story going around (i don't remember much else about that quest except it was kaveh thing) and how she really values the legends the mercs pass down, and i think she would have an interest in mythology, especially oral storytelling. maybe i'm biased as an anthropologist, but i DO think she would go out of her way to ask those in her community for stories or read about desert legends.

🫒 - what kind of hugger is your f/o? do they give good hugs? do they like hugs? do they like receiving hugs?

dehya, so very aware of her strength, she hugs very softly and gently when she first meets someone. when she gets closer, she hugs them like a shield, always throwing her arms around the outside and almost hovering over them no matter the height difference. absolutely a wonderful hugger, she is the equivalent of a giant weighted blanket when she does this.

i think she would like receiving hugs but she would actually be shyer about it than she lets on. she's not super used to physical affection and she has been shown to get flustered easily when pampered on, but really she is very happy :3

🍒 - if your f/o and you spend a day doing anything, anything at all, what would they do and why?

back to the 🥑 question, i think rosemary and dehya would love finding some sort of rumor or investigating a legend to see what they can find. both really love legends, folklore, mythology, etc, so they would go to some ruins or wherever it takes them to investigate, take some notes, potentially fight off weird forces of evil leaking into the desert. then of course after fighting side by side all day, collapsing into each other with that warm rush of exhaustion in their veins.

Section Three: Sougo

🍌 - does your f/o have a vendetta against The Big Light™? what kind of lighting do they prefer?

zale your absolute genius mind sending this one for sougo. how did i not see it before. guy with autistic traits who carries around an eye mask all the time. that thing is definitely a sensory aid. he may or may not be sleeping at any given time, he might just be regulating.

i think he's the type who would function and focus best at night bc it would be dark and he can work by lantern or some other warm lighting

🍏 - if you have any queer headcanons for your f/o, how did they realize they were queer?

oh i have SO been meaning to draw him quoting this:

but anyway. i think in the arc "the gang learns what gender dysphoria is", when they all turn back to their original sex and say "wow haha! aren't we all so happy it's back to the way it was :•)" i think it would actually be an egg crack moment for sougo.

you think sougo growing out his hair and sweeping his bangs to the side was a reference to a younger hijikata? WRONG. souko reference. yeah sure it's a coincidence that you styled your hair exactly like when aliens made you a girl.

anyway i honestly don't have a solid sougo gender headcanon or any that are "canon" to okiria purely bc i enjoy playing with him like putty and if i made anything "canon" to my selfship i wouldn't get to play with other headcanons

🍠 - what are a few of your f/os favorite pastimes or things that they do when they're bored?

a bored sougo is everyone's worst nightmare, because he will go looking for trouble or cause it. i love this pic of him lovingly reading a book titled "100 pranks for sadists"

so honestly he's whipping out one of these. i can't even come up with a hypothetical prank because he's such a wild card and i don't think i would give justice to his... creativity. but yeah. finding ways to mess around with hijikata. one time he made a saw trap for fun so you know he's probably planning another creative project like that.

Extra Credit: Jane

THIS IS EXTRA CREDIT BC IT I HAVEN'T STUDIED YET OKAY THIS WASN'T ON THE STUDY GUIDE ‼️‼️

🥔 - does your f/o have any food dishes they make often? is there any foods you make for your f/o that they enjoy?

it looks like she's a sweet tooth just like me, which is perfect bc i ONLY know how to make sweets! i would love to make her lots of sweets like lemon/blueberry bread or muffins or smthn she can take with her on her way and start her day with. would put so much love in it and maybe she can keep me company when baking too...

🌶️ - does your f/o have any remedies they follow when they get sick? like taking a shot of whiskey to get rid of a fever?

jane strikes me as the type to eat an entire bag of cough drops a day. just keeps popping them in her mouth saying yeah i'm sure it's working bc my throat doesn't hurt. see when i stop taking them it hurts. can't tell if she's joking or not.

🥝 - would your f/o ever let you do their make-up? what does their make-up process look like? is it simple? complex?

her typical daily makeup would be one of those natural looks that actually takes at least an hour to complete– after all, it is much harder to do things that look natural.

a master of disguise knows a lot about makeup, especially the way it can accentuate, change, or mask facial features. if she let me do her makeup, she would probably be surprised by what i've done, noting the features i highlighted must be the ones that stand out to me most, the features i love. i think for someone always changing their face, it would be an intimate experience that would almost be a little shocking. make her feel something she didn't expect.

[abelas]

Alright. Picture this: Anders and Davrin are no longer the luckiest bitches in Thedas because they get to revel in pet ownership. Suddenly, you join their elite clique. If you could choose any Thedasian animal or monster [which could be tamed] as a pet, what would it be?

this is such a good question!!

of course my mind first goes to dragons, because, hell yeah. having a dragon companion would be SICK. but that's too easy right?

so then i'm thinking about that headcanon from someone on here about a darkspawn being a LI/companion which is very intriguing but god the SMELL

so cute creatures are flashing before my eyes now (snofleur, hart, druffalo, etc).

aaand i'm circling back to dragon, in particular kaltenzahn which is, to meee, cute :3c

[icehearts]

What's a trait in others that your character can't stand? Is that because it's something they don't like in general, or do you think it's more a reflection of how they seem themselves/the world?

Yuzu is bold, hot-headed, and always ready to throw herself into the thick of things. She seems like the type who would despise cowards, right? Well, not really. If someone doesn't think they can handle a fight and would prefer to run? Fine. Call that a tactical retreat.

It's indecisiveness that really steams her. Those who can never seem to arrive at a decision, ANY decision. Someone who can't commit to any course of action for any length of time. Perpetual fence-sitters. Whether you decide to fight or decide to run, that's up to you — just make the godsdamned choice.

Ask any merchant of Ul'dah, and they'll tell you how much they love selfless customers. Anyone so eager and willing to part with their gil — especially, supposedly, for a good cause? That must be a gift from the Traders themselves. On the surface, Esca would agree. As she has ambitions that go beyond increasing profits, easily-manipulated individuals are invaluable assets.

At her core, however, Esca cannot stand selflessness. Where's your pride? Your backbone? Your self-preservation? It's disgraceful, if not downright dangerous.

And besides, she's watched too many loved ones set themselves on fire to keep others warm. Seen too many who are willing to throw themselves onto the pyre in service to some greater purpose, caring not one whit about those they leave behind. If she cares for you (or at least has a plan for you), you're going to live whether you like it or not.

When it comes to Armaia's line of work, indifference is equal to malice.

Mammet creation is a delicate endeavor. To her, they're more than just tools or machines: they're unique creations designed to enrich the lives of others. She believes that, just like humans, mammets are capable of both great and terrible things — it all depends on the will of their creators. A careless mammet engineer could lead to a malfunctioning machine, which in turn could lead to any number of unfortunate (or even lethal) accidents.

Prior to dropping out of the Studium, Armaia's worst fear came to pass: one of her mammet prototypes malfunctioned and injured some of her fellow students. She attributed this failure to a number of things: carelessness, her own ineptitude, and an overall failure to live up to the standards expected in her department. Since then, she's developed a zealous passion for her craft, often consumed by her work. Anything less than utter devotion is unacceptable.

Mirou is a pretty simple man: he loves to observe people, to study them and all their quirks and contradictions. He can be tolerant of —or even amused by — some traits that others might consider annoying or insufferable. There is one trait that he cannot stand, though, and that is pushiness. He will dig in his heels and avoid doing anything that's asked of him — even if it's in his best interest.

This is not because he delights in being contrarian. Mirou was raised in a rigid, structured environment with little allowance for deviation. Those that bent would be the ones to break. Ever since he broke away from that place, Mirou's independence will always be his first priority, sometimes to his own detriment.

[violinist-rachel]

Dear Rachel? What is your outlook on life? What do you value most in your own life?

"My outlook on life?"

"Hmm...." "I suppose I believe in karma. I think all of our actions will eventually have consequences that'll one day catch up to us, no matter how hard we try to run away."

"Now, I'm not perfect by any means. Far from it. But during my time in this world, it's important to me that I try to do more good than harm in my life."

[ultipoter]

4,5 and 6 questions for game ask >:3c also U CUTE!!! 💖💖💖

(THANK YOU BK!! U CUTE ALSO!!! I didn't forget about this, I just didn't have time to get to my laptop and answer properly!! ;u;)

The ask game

4: Worst game you’ve ever played? I'm gonna dodge this a little bit because I like positivity. So I absolutely love Fragile Dreams. I saw the opening video of it years ago and I was In Love. Then I finally found it in a game store and got to play it! I loved it! But also!! It's just not that good to play. The battle system is cumbersome with Wii's motion controls, I remember being quite baffled by the story and frustrated with the backtracking.

But despite all that, I think of it with utmost fondness and I want to replay it for the vibes alone. Maybe traversing through a beautiful ruined world is meant to be a little cumbersome.

5: A popular series/game you just can’t get into no matter how much you try? I have a very difficult time getting into visual novels, unfortunately. I have bought many I know would interest me, but it's just difficult for me to get started (with some exceptions).

6: A game that’s changed you the most? I'm gonna take the opportunity to be a sap and say Persona 4. I hadn't even played it, but I saw art by @manadyne of it on DeviantArt's "newest" at our lord's year 2009, started talking to them because I thought their art was just the bees knees, and I imagine my life would be quite different had that connection not happened. Being friends with them has inspired me to work on my art and they're my biggest enabler on OC things. I genuinely think I would be doing different things right now had I not met them.

[kittyeekcube]

For the Sunday asks, 2, 16 &39 :)

2 what’s your favorite candle scent?

ohh i love a candle scent that smells sweet or a little spicy like a freshly baked treat, like vanilla and cinnamon or pumpkin pie!! 🥧 i also love a candle that smells like being in nature like a lavender candle or a candle with pine needles!! 🌲

16 what fantastical beast or cryptid do you sort of believe is real?

my first thought was selkies, they are one of my favorites!! i like to think of them whenever i see a seal at the beach!! 🦭🌊 for a cryptid, i would say nessie!! i’m sensing a water theme here hehe 🩵

39 what’s your favorite written or filmed genre?

my favorite written genre is fantasy (animal fiction in particular) and my favorite film genre is animation!! i adore fiction in general!! i’ve been watching and rereading some nostalgic childhood favorites lately and i’m enjoying venturing into other genres as well! 📚🎞️

[senditothemoonn]

Not ScotFra related (although you’re hooking me into them) but where do you think FrUK would like to vacation at?

I think first of all that where they'd like to go is not necessarily where they end up going. In my mind, Fran is a beach bum, he loves sunbathing and lazing about on the sand by the sea/on a deck chair by the pool of a 5 star hotel while Arthur prefers the countryside. He'd take a little cottage in the Cotswolds over a luxury vacation in the Maldives anyday (something which Fran thinks is insanity) He goes for walks through the hills and forests - not hikes; my man likes to amble (something which Fran also thinks is insanity)

I think it'd be hard for them to choose a holiday without disagreeing and since neither likes to compromise, it would lead to the most idiotic arguments you've ever heard:

"We are not going to the lake District again, Arthur."

"What? And go to Nice and have you take us to a 'lovely little secluded beach' only to get there and find everyone with their bloody cocks out?!"

"I already told you, I did not know that was a nudist beach!"

"You did the second time!"

"Well...you would not have come otherwise..."

Neither of them wants to cede to the other and so they'd end up going somewhere neither of them had initially suggested. I can see them going to visit Al and Matt although I don't know if that really counts as much of a holiday.

If they're feeling particularly grown up, however, they'd probably compromise. One year, they agree to go on Francis' choice where Arthur (still stubbornly wearing his t shirt) sits under an umbrella all day and still somehow manages to end up covered in sunburn. Cue a full day relaxing in doors where Francis can look after his poor burnt husband in air conditioned safety.

Next time Arthur gets to take Francis on picturesque walks through the English countryside that admittedly aren't as strenuous as he thought they'd be. Arthur does inevitably end up carrying him that last stretch back to the cottage because of course he packed completely inappropriate footwear ahsjsjaj

[oblivions-dawn]

🥵 : Is your OC perceived as physically attractive to others? Is it at first glance or is it something that takes more time to reach fruition? 💦 : Is your OC’s attractiveness based on looks or a more intangible aura? 👀 : Does your OC believe they are attractive? Do they use that to their advantage? - for Vigdis!

✑ Is your OC perceived as physically attractive to others? Is it at first glance or is it something that takes more time to reach fruition?

Answered here!

✑ Is your OC’s attractiveness based on looks or a more intangible aura?

I--both?? Can it be both???? I think it's both; I really like both. Or neither. Thought I was just saying that her dangerous aura usually scares everyone away . . . No one tells me. They just tell me they like HER MURDER and frankly I do too. So I suppose it really comes down to her killer glare and wrath-like vibes.

✑ Does your OC believe they are attractive? Do they use that to their advantage?

Personally, I don't remember the last time Vigdis looked at a mirror or her own reflection. Not to say she doesn't know what she looks like, because she has a general idea of her appearance--but when you're rugged 24/7, it doesn't really matter to you. So, needless to say, no, she does not in fact use her appearance to her advantage. Unless it's looking like she's going to fucking KILL YOU to get what she wants. Does that count??

[angel-milano]

What would be each of your muses dream vacation?

under a readmore so i don't flood the dash!

ANGEL - tbh i think she's always secretly wanted to see the world. she was very convinced she would be stuck in america for her entire life and has only recently been able to branch out, first with swynlake and then anywhere that karen has been able to take her. if given the chance i think she'd jump at the opportunity to go somewhere in asia. she'd love to explore the cities, trying out street food, but would also love wolfing out in entirely new biomes!

DARIUS - lame as hell and he'd never admit it to anyone but now that he's reconnected, he'd love to go on a family vacation. growing up, he and his siblings didn't have the means or time for trips, so now that he has that he'd love to gift them with the trip of a lifetime. his own frame of reference is really just the isles, so go to would be the Knee, but his research and teaching has opened him up to other places around the world, particularly south america! he'd love to see magical cultures that aren't his own (and hey he's already dealing with a dictatorship at home, why not abroad!)

LUISA - she just wants to see the shores of her hometown island one more time 🥲 going with her fam would be ideal

BONES - he's been everywhere and done everything. an ideal vacation for him would be a staycation where everyone gets some time off and gets to relax, which it sounds like the hauntley crew is doing this year <3

DEVYN - the weeb answer, they'd love to go to japan. they want to go akihabara and the pokemon center and stationary shops and konbinis and live out their anime fantasies. ofc they'd love to go with their brothers or the magnifiques!

RALPH - ralph doesn't usually get to relax. an ideal vacation for him would be less about the place and more about the atmosphere, getting to just chill out, play video games, nap, and eat good food. ideally alone away from other people, or with a few friends. so putting that together with his preferred climate, id say a cabin or airbnb out in the snow

ATTA - va-cay-tion...? never heard of it. no but fr she'd love to go see other hollows out there in the world. her heart really breaks for milori and his people and she wishes she could have seen it in its heyday. selfishly, she would love to go somewhere with no light pollution so she could see the stars in their entirety and the milky way

BEN - i don't know if ben has ever let his guard down in his life or if he ever would. i think the only place he'd feel comfortable relaxing is deep in the ocean, where he could be in his true form freely and not have to worry about running into anyone else (except those pesky mermaids...)

[julymusings]

Jason is the type of person to put on some shitty romance movie only for his date to fall asleep and for him to get strangely invested.

are you still watching?

i saddle up my horse and I ride into the city. i make a lot of noise 'cause the girls they are so pretty. riding up and down broadway on my old stud leroy, and the girls say...

or; 3 times Jason Todd gets hooked on your television choices [3.7k]

jason todd x fem!reader; this is so real...and so clever!!! i LOVE the concept. i did get a little carried away and lost the plot unforch...pt3 is just a sex dream ab cowboy!jason so. also I apologize for taking forever to respond. tw...klance mentioned💀 & suggestive but not explicit. and i do bash on voltron in pt2 a little but it's all in good fun🫶i did my time with them divider

i.

“Baby, I love you, but if you don’t pick something soon I’ll call Dick in here to entertain us with his backflips.”

“Oh, be quiet,” you huff. Though as you scroll, once again, through all the options on Netflix, you fear his threat may be serious.

You reach the bottom of the page, having found nothing. You peek at Jason from the corner of your eye and hover the cursor over the ‘Back to Top’ button.

“No.” He reaches to grab the laptop from you, but his injuries hinder his usual swiftness. You shriek in objection and roll away to the other side of the bed, computer held tight in your clutches.

“Babe.” He groans. He tries to reach across the bed to you, but his grasp falls short by mere centimeters as you frantically begin another scan of the site.

“I will find something, I promise!” You say. “Just one more minute!”

He rolls his eyes. “You said that ten minutes ago. And I’m the one who’s injured, shouldn’t I get to pick?”

You spare him a glance, pondering over his wrapped foot elevated on a pillow, and the bandages around his torso. His arm has fallen flat on his bed, having given up on its attempt to catch you. That alone should guilt you into saying yes; his childhood bed is just shy of too small for his adult self, so being unable to reach the other end speaks to the severity of his pain. And to add salt to the wound, you know he isn’t exactly fond of staying at his father’s house, but he is in no shape to recuperate alone.

“I would say yes, but you don’t know any good shows! All you watch is Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives.”

He scoffs. “I thought you liked that show!”

You scoff back, imitating him. “I did. But a person can only stand so much of Guy Fieri talking with his mouth full.”

He quiets, probably searching for a rebuttal, but you can’t imagine he’ll find any. You use the opportunity to resume your search unimpeded. 

After a few minutes, you perk up. “Ooh, they added New Girl on Netflix!” You scoot back over on the bed to his side, satisfied with your choice.

“What is that?” Jason asks.

You whip your head to him. “You don’t know New Girl?”

He pushes a stray hair behind your ear, eyes narrowed. “Should I?”

Your eyes flit to the computer screen, then back to him, and you sigh. “No, I guess not.”

You’re about to press play on the first episode but stop yourself. “Do you want to choose? You’re already hurting enough, I don’t want to torture you with this too. Besides, I’ve seen it, like, a million times anyway.”

“No, it’s okay.” He turns the computer towards him and presses play. “I don’t need any of my siblings barging in and catching me enjoying Guy Fieri. I’d never hear the end of it.”

You titter at his remark and set your laptop in the middle of you, a little farther away so you don’t have to crane your neck to see the screen. He lifts his arm to drape it around you but struggles with raising it past shoulder level. You meet him halfway by ducking underneath his arm and settling it over your shoulders. He kisses the top of your head in thanks.

Leaning against his chest, the rise and fall of his breathing is too hypnotic for you to focus. Paired with the warmth of his skin, bare so as not to obstruct access to his wound dressings, you are quickly lulled to sleep.

It must be several hours later when movement against you disturbs you from sleep. The room is almost pitch black, save for the dim glow of the computer, still on and resting on your legs a few feet away. The air is thick with late-night silence, and fighting against the heaviness of your eyelids is so laborious that you have to use your hand to pry them open. Jason is squirming next to you, hand outstretched, low huffs of pain slipping from his mouth.

A shot of adrenaline courses through you and you stumble into action.

“What happened? What hurts?” The laptop tips off your legs and falls to the bed, landing on its side as you scramble to your knees and face him. “Should I get someone?”

“What? No, I— I’m fine, why?” He squints at you through the darkness.

“You—” Your throat catches and you take a deep, steadying breath. “It sounded like you were in pain.”

“No, honey, I’m fine. It’s okay. You can go back to sleep.” Jason takes your wrist and gently pulls you back into his side. You don’t budge.

“Then why were you moving?” You scan him for any signs of a worsening injury. Downplaying his own pain is not something you can put past him, unfortunately.

“I…” His eyes look past you for a quick second. He swallows. “I wasn’t,” he says, unconvincingly.

You narrow your eyes at him, then turn around to see what he is looking at, despite his (false) reassurances. Your laptop, still on its side, lies awake and open to the Netflix website. You pick it up to get a closer look at the screen. The player has gone dark, and overcast in white lettering; ‘New Girl: Are you still watching?’

You turn back to Jason, dumbfounded. “You risked hurting yourself…for this?”

Now adjusted to the darkness, you can see his cheeks tinged with pink. “No?”

“Jason.”

“You’re the one who put it on!”

You check the clock in the corner of the screen.

“It’s three AM, Jay. You need to sleep if you want your body to heal.” You argue.

“It wasn’t on purpose!” He defends. “I can’t sleep sitting up, and I need help lying down.” he fails to meet your eyes as he says this.

You cross your arms, tilting your face to catch his gaze. “And what am I doing here?”

“I didn’t want to wake you up,” he mumbles.

You just stare. It takes fifteen seconds for him to break.

“Fine. I was enjoying the show. I wanted to keep watching. Happy?” He punctuates his statement with a shrug but groans through a clenched jaw, remembering the injuries to his upper body.

“Okay, just—” You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose between your fingers. “It’s too late for this. Can we please go to sleep?” You don’t wait for an answer, shutting the laptop and placing it on the bedside table.

He leans off the headboard so you can help him shift his body down the bed and lie flat, and you lie down next to him.

“Comfy?” You ask.

“Yes.”

“Need anything?”

“No.”

“Okay. Goodnight,” you whisper. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Jason says quietly.

You snuggle into his side. It’s quiet for a few minutes, but you can tell by his breathing pattern that he’s still awake. He whispers your name into the darkness, hoping you’re still awake.

“Yes, honey?” You answer.

There is a beat of silence. Then, “When do Nick and Jess get together?”

“Go to sleep.”

ii.

Jason leans against the kitchen counter behind him, hands in his pockets, as he watches the microwave dish spin in a slow circle. It whirs under the yellow lightbulb, the flat paper packet puffing up among raucous popping. With sixty seconds left to kill, he searches the cabinets for a large enough bowl to fit the family-size packet of popcorn, as well as the various add-ons you adore.

The first time you invited Jason over for a movie night, in the beginning stages of your relationship, he looked on in wonder as you combined the grocery store’s entire snack aisle into one salty, sugary, buttery abomination in a jumbo Hello Kitty bowl.

“How do you even come up with something like this?” He had asked, ripping open the bag of pretzels as you emptied the fresh batch of popcorn into the bowl.

“Wait!” You stopped him just before he could pour the pretzels in. “Sugary stuff first. While it’s still hot. Then it gets all melty and good.” You dumped an entire bag of mini marshmallows, caramels, and M&M’s in, and gave it a few stirs. “And to answer your question, I was in high school and experiencing intense munchies.”

You gave him the OK to add the pretzels, so he did. “I envy your dentist,” he said, and you stuck your tongue out at him.

Now, with plenty more movie nights under his belt, you trusted him enough to assemble your party mix on his own while you select something to watch.

The microwave beeps. As he rips open the popcorn bag, you yell from the living room.

“Hey, what about The Bourne Identity?” You call out. “Have you—? Wait.” You cut yourself off.

“What’s it about?” He yells back. You don’t answer. “Babe?” He calls again.

“Never mind! I’m gonna keep looking!”

He adds the sugary snacks first, stirring them until they melt, just how you like it. He’s tearing into the bag of pretzels when he hears you shriek.

He drops the bag and bolts to the living room, pretzels scattering all over the counter and floor.

“What happened?” His eyes bounce around the entire room, scanning for any threat.

He’s unsure what he expected to find, but it was a tad more perilous than you simply sitting on the couch, staring open-mouthed at the TV.

“Uh…nothing. Sorry.” Your face flushes. The remote is still raised and pointed at the screen.

“Vol…tron?” Jason reads from the title sequence that plays in the preview window. “Is this some kind of anime?”

“No…sort of, maybe,” you say. “It doesn’t matter. I'm just surprised to see it is all. I loved this show when I was younger.”

“Is it any good?” He asks.

You look to the side, thinking about it. You settle on: “Define good.”

His forehead wrinkles, mouth falling slightly open. “Did you…enjoy watching it?”

“Define enjoy.”

“Okay, forget I asked.” He sighs and goes back to the kitchen.

When he returns a few minutes later, floor pretzels in the trash and counter pretzels swept into the bowl, you’re already watching the first episode.

“This your choice?” He asks. You take the bowl in your lap and he settles down next to you, his arm wrapping around your waist.

“Definitely not. Just wanted to reminisce until you got back.” You frown at the bowl. “Where are all the pretzels?”

He chuckles. “That’s what you get for screaming. Dropped ‘em on the floor.”

You pout. “I didn’t scream. I was surprised. Now the ratio’s off, there’s not enough saltiness to balance the sweetness.”

“Poor baby,” he croons sarcastically. “Only getting a quarter bag of pretzels ‘stead of a full.”

You were going to switch the television to a movie you both liked, but you spent the entire first episode bickering about the important role each ingredient plays in, what you call, “The Party Mix Experience”. The next episode auto-played on its own, and you let it.

During the second episode, you and Jason were absorbed in a competition to see who could catch more flying popcorn pieces in their mouth (Jason), which then devolved into seeing who could dodge more popcorn kernels thrown to the face (also Jason).

By the beginning of episode three, you settled into meaningless chatter while paying half-hearted attention to the TV screen, and by the end, you were laid out on the couch, head in Jason’s lap, while you scrolled on your phone and he stroked your hair. You drifted to a light sleep, coaxed by his fingers scratching at your scalp. 

When you wake from your nap, there’s a blanket draped over you and Jason’s hand is still settled in your hair. You push yourself up to sit beside him, speaking through a yawn. “How long was I asleep?”

Jason adjusts the blanket so it covers both of you. “Um…I dunno. Three episodes, maybe.”

“You’re still watching,” you remark, as the end credits for episode six begin to roll.

He says nothing. You both stare as the auto-play timer for the next episode counts down. Next to the remote, his fingers twitch.

You purse your lips, suppressing a grin. “You know, there’s quite an online community for people who like this show.”

“Ha. Were you part of it?” He muses.

“Yup. And I deserve a medal of valor for my time in those trenches.” You kiss his cheek and stand up, stretching your arms. “I’m going to bed. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” he says. His voice is low and gravelly with weariness.

You turn toward the bedroom when a call of your name stops you.

“Is it just me, or is something goin’ on between the red guy and the blue guy?”

“Oh, honey,” you sigh. It’s loud and pitying. You bend down to cup his cheek and draw him in for a kiss. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Babe!” He yells after you as you disappear into the bedroom. “You didn’t answer my question!”

iii.

It’s only a Hallmark movie, but with how he’s reacting, it might as well be six hours of paint drying. Jason is not eager to spend his night watching some boring, formulaic cliché, but it's late and you don't have anything better to do.

“That is absolutely not true,” he says when you counter his protests with this excuse.

“It’s two o’clock in the morning, Jay. Is there anything else to do, except sleep?” You rub your tired eyes. Both of you could use some sleep but, burrowed as you are under a pile of blankets, moving all the way from the couch to the bed seems impossible.

He leans in close, lips brushing against your ear. “I can think of a few things.”

His warm breath tickles your neck, and you feel a shiver despite the heat you’ve conserved in your little blanket burrito. The faintest of kisses is pressed behind your ear, and his eyes glint with familiar mischief when he pulls back.

You brush him off, rolling your eyes in amusement. “Do any of those things involve flannel-wearing farmer hunks or the True Meaning of Christmas?”

Turning back to the television, you take the remote from his hands, catching the tail end of a disgruntled mumble about how ‘I can buy a flannel…’

He grumbles a few more complaints during the movie’s first act (‘he’s not even that hunky’) before you scold him to silence. Once he’s quieted, and you settle more comfortably into him, your head is nestled securely in the crook of his shoulder with arms wrapped around his bicep. The warmth of him has you fighting against the tempting call of REM. Right around when the independent, successful, businesswoman protagonist discovers the handsome, flannel-clad man who helped repair her car is also the single father who runs an honest family business, you start to drift off, falling asleep amid thoughts of wearing plaid in the countryside.

You open your eyes to find yourself standing in a vast, open field. 

Thump. Thump.

It’s unclear where the sound is coming from, but a splash of red in your periphery stands out. You turn; there’s a barn off in the distance.

Thump.

Your legs carry you in its direction. Growing closer by the second, the thumping sound echoes louder in your ears. When you round the corner of the structure, the front doors are propped wide open by cement blocks, and bales of hay are stacked outside the doors. A large figure, whose back is to you, is lugging a bale by its straps. He hauls it onto his shoulder, and his shirtsleeves tighten around his thick arms. He brings it to the barn, tossing it onto a pile of more hay bales. It lands with that same thump.

When he turns around, it’s in slow motion.

The sleeves of his plaid flannel are rolled up his arms, exposing his large, veiny forearms. Under the flannel, he sports a simple white t-shirt, jeans, and work boots that give him an extra inch of height. His face and chest are shiny with sweat, and his shirt is soaked through. He holds a toothpick between gritted teeth.

It’s Jason. In a cowboy hat.

He takes off his hat and runs a hand through his hair. Its dampness makes it stay slicked back rather than settling into its usual shape where little curls are always falling over his eyes. Then, he sees you. A slow, sly grin spreads across his face. He puts his hat back on and removes the toothpick so he can speak.

“Hey there, little lady,” he drawls lazily, the Gotham accent you’re so accustomed to replaced with a southern twang. It does something to you that you’re a little embarrassed to admit. He looks you up and down, pausing above your knee for a split second before continuing.

“Hi,” you say, averting your gaze from where it had zeroed in on a droplet of sweat running down his neck. Your face burns redder than his beautifully sun-kissed cheeks.

He chuckles. “You jus’ gonna stand there or you gonna lend a hand? Compost ain’t gonna turn itself.”

He easily hauls up another bale, and you follow him into the barn.

You watch as he shirks it onto the pile, then repeats with the remaining few bales. He seems to forget you’re standing there as he gets so absorbed in his work, expression tightening in focus. You lean on the wooden post behind you and soak it in; every sound, every flexed muscle, every display of firm strength has you feeling like the air has been punched out of you. He carries the final bale into the barn and his low grunt as he throws it off his shoulder has a swooning sigh escape you. It catches his attention.

Your chest tightens in embarrassment as he prowls closer. He leans over you, hand against the wooden post right above your head. With him this close, a smattering of freckles is visible over the bridge of his nose, likely due to all the sun exposure. Huffing and sweaty, his eyes drag down your face and stop at your mouth. He swallows hard, and his Adam’s apple bobs up and down.

He lifts his free hand to trace over the thin strap of your top. His fingers ghost over the skin, barely touching. “This is pretty,” he says, voice low. “What’s a pretty girl like you doin’ all the way out here?”

And you just can’t help it anymore. You lurch up to him, desperate to close the space between you. You kiss him hard, and he kisses you back, his hand rising from your shoulder to grip the side of your neck. His thumb brushes your jaw, and your hands grip the material of his flannel, yanking it down to bring him even closer. You pull him against you so roughly that your head bumps the post behind you from the force. He smirks, teasing, into the kiss as his hand comes to cup the back of your head.

“Easy, sweetheart. I ain’t goin’ anywhere.” After getting his fill from your lips, he slowly graces a path to your neck, kissing, licking, and nipping as he goes. His relaxed leisure perfectly juxtaposes your frantic hunger for him.

You grip his face and pull his mouth back to yours, kissing him with even more fervor. You take his bottom lip between your teeth, biting down with little care for gentleness, and tug at the skin. He groans, and it rumbles deep in his throat. You soothe the spot with your tongue, and your eyes roll back into your head at the salty taste of his skin. As his tongue slides between your lips, he removes the hand that’s leaning onto the post and settles it on the skin of your thigh. It drags upward, feeling every inch of skin on his fingertips before disappearing under the hem of your skirt. At the same time, your hands slide down his body. His touch explores higher, and yours slips under his shirt to ground yourself on the hard skin of his abdomen, which has become slick with sweat.

The sound you make is debauched, coming from the deepest recesses of your stomach. He pulls back, wearing a cheeky smile. He opens his mouth to speak and says—

“Wait, what the fuck?”

You jerk awake. Jason is yelling.

“Why would you go with him?” He exclaims at the TV, and then turns to exclaim to you, “Why would she go with him?”

You stare at him, agape, trying to process your surroundings and asking yourself what just happened.

“Shit. Were you asleep?” Jason puts his outrage on hold.

You nod. “Yeah— yes.” Your voice comes out scratchy and hollow. “I was.”

“Sorry, baby. Didn’t mean to wake you up,” he says. His eyebrows furrow. “Are you hot?”

“What?”

“You look warm.” He presses the back of his hand to your flushed neck. “Is it too many blankets?”

Though his hand is cool, you feel even warmer, the image of his hand gripping that same spot of your neck flashing through your mind.

“I’m…good,” you say. “I think I’ll go to bed.” You dig yourself out of the shell of blankets and stand, but he doesn’t follow.

“Oh.” Jason glances at the TV, which is still in a commercial break. “You— did you want me to come?”

You don’t know what to say.

“The, uh…” He runs a hand through his hair, and you have to stifle a gasp. “The guy from her successful city life tracked her down to the small town to get back together. She said yes.” Then he sighs, sounding genuinely distressed. “There’s no way they’d end it like that, right? He was awful to her!”

At this, you crack a smile. “Do you want to finish the movie, Jason?” A hint of satisfaction seeps into your tone.

He clears his throat. “…Maybe.”

You plop back down on the couch with a hum. He interlaces your fingers and kisses the back of your hand before redirecting his attention to the screen.

“Babe?” You ask.

“Hm?” He answers, not looking away from the movie.

“Do you own any flannels?”

SAVE A HORSE RIDE A COWBOYYYYYYY

love when u leave messages and feedback it feeds my praise kink

for part one: cut to me sitting up in bed shrugging my shoulders over and over again to see which muscles it uses and if that coincides with the injuries i gave him to see if that action causing him pain makes sense (it was inconclusive so i made his injuries vague oopsie)

for part two: the bourne identity (2002) is a movie about a guy named jason who wakes up not knowing where or who he is and somehow has elite training in combat and surveillance, though he doesn't know where it's from. he runs around functioning on pure instinct to survive while getting bits of his memory back, remembering that whoever he worked for was cutthroat, expected him to obey no matter what, and forget the person he used to be before joining their mission. sound familiar?

for part three: cut to me genuinely tweaking while proofreading bc i let my friend read it and so rereading it, knowing that she read it, was so embarrassing. i was screaming into my pillow & it took 20 minutes to get through 2k words bc i had to keep taking breaks. not an exaggeration

If any of you saw me change the theme of my masterlist 5 times yesterday only to change it back to what it was before…no you didn’t

[sadhours]

kinktober day two • accidental stimulation

aka: melting

steve harrington x fem!reader

kinktober masterlist

cw: 18+, minors dni, dry humping, public sex (kind of), slight humiliation, p in v

🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍

Scoops Ahoy! is the bane of your existence. Shilling ice cream for bratty kids and old classmates is a real pain in the ass. Especially on days like today, when you have to work with Steve instead of Robin. Steve’s annoying, always has been. You were once paired up with him for a biology project in high school and he didn’t do a goddamn thing but took credit and you’ve been holding onto that grudge for years. At the time, Steve treated you like the dog shit under his shoe but times have changed.

You’d sprouted tits and actually learned how to take care of yourself— how to wear makeup and style your hair. It’s landed you in a weird spot with Harrington. He hits on repeatedly, almost on the hour during hour six hour shifts. Maybe if he’d hadn’t been such a dick to you in high school, you’d consider it because let’s face it; Steve Harrington is a babe. A stupid, arrogant babe. It’s kind of fun, turning him down. Feels like you’ve won something. Even though, you ponder what would happen if you gave into his incessant flirting.

However, today, you wanna sock him right in his beautiful face. He’s been incredibly annoying, complaining how he hasn’t felt the touch of a woman since Nancy and how the uniform really isn’t helping his case. You’d beg to differ. He unfortunately looks… attractive in it. But he’s fallen off the social ladder and that’s why the girls reject him.

It’s closing time, you’re bent over into the drop ins. Covering the big gallons of ice cream when Harrington tries to sneak behind you to close up the topping bar. His crotch grazes your ass and he freezes. Pathetically, makes a shocked noise and presses his hand against the small of your back.

“What are you doing?” you ask, voice echoing inside the drop-in freezer.

Steve doesn’t move, keeps his crotch firmly pressed against your ass and even rolls his hips. You can feel his cock hardening behind his polyester shorts and your eyes widen. Why the fuck isn’t he moving? And worse, how did he get hard just from barely grazing against you? He’s really down bad.

You try to look back at him but then he’s grabbing your hips, rolls his again and you stare stunned down at the tub of U.S.S Butterscotch.

He jolts back, you can hear his body making contact with the counter behind him as he exclaims, “It was an accident! I didn’t mean to…”

You pull your head out of the freezer and turn to him, a sly smile spreading across your lips, “Did that make you hard?”

“No,” he lies but the proof is staring you in the face, those little blue shorts doing nothing to help him hide it.

You laugh, soft and shocked and fine, okay— flattered.

“Wow,” you exhale, “I didn’t realize it was that dire.”

“Shut up,” he shakes his head and tries to look nonchalant, but his cheeks are red, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Another laugh, your eyes trained on his erection straining through his uniform and then he moves his hands to cover it. His eyes everywhere but on you. You hum, pout and tilt your head, “You’re not as suave as you think.”

He swallows hard, “I need to, close the topping station… I uh—“

“Yeah… and I need to finish covering the ice cream. I’m gonna bend back over and do that…” you tell him, feeling bold because well, it’s been a long time for you to and you can’t deny you enjoyed the feeling of him against you. “If I feel something… I’m just gonna keep doing what I’m doing.”

You spin back around and get back to covering the tubs. Steve’s not as stupid as you thought, because when you duck back into the freezer, his crotch is pressed against your ass again. His large hands wrap around your hips, holding you steady.

Thank god you guys were behind tonight. The mall has to be empty, gates all closed and the whole food court is quiet. You wiggle back against him and Steve lets out a sound you hate to admit is pretty.

Keeping true to your word, you act as if nothing is happening as you cover all the tub while Steve grinds against you from behind. And you let him. Welcome it, actually. Feel pretty because of it. You even grind back against him, feeling your thighs heat up. This is dangerous yet it feels like maybe it was bound to happen. A part of you thinks that maybe if you give Steve this, he’ll stop being so insufferable. Like he needs to have this kind of interaction with a woman in order to stop seeking it out so desperately. You want to give Steve what he wants— what he’s been begging for for months.

The pair of you keep grinding into each other for a while. Until you start to feel uncomfortable from the coldness of the freezer. So you pull yourself out of it. Move over to the register and bend over the counter. Steve follows you, presses himself up against your ass again and drags his hands down your back.

So you reach behind you, pull the skirt of your uniform up and then push your underwear down your thighs.

“Fuck,” Steve exhales as he watches and you can hear him undoing his shorts and shoving them down. “I’ve had dreams like this.”

Yeah, that’s a big inflation to your ego. And you can’t help but admit, “Me too.”

Steve groans lowly, brings his fingers to your cunt and rubs them up through your folds. He scissors your clit and then brings them back down, circling around your entrance. “I’m kind of big, I should probably get you ready,” he says and sinks two fingers into your pussy.

You gasp and moan, rolling your hips back on his fingers. Part of you wants to look back, see if he’s exaggerating but from what you could see in his shorts, you don’t think he is. Steve thrusts his fingers in and out of you slowly, spreads them while they’re deep inside and you have to bite your lip to keep quiet. You’re sure you’re alone in this mall, aside from the security guards but they don’t hang around the food court this time of night. Better be safe, though.

“You dream about me?” you ask, voice shaky.

“All the time,” Steve breathes out, pulling his fingers out but circles the tips of them along your hole. “Didn’t know it’d be so easy like this.”

You giggle, pushing your ass back against him as you tell him, “Me either. You’re a pain in my ass, but you are cute.”

“Am I?” he asks, leaning over you and kissing against your neck just as he slides his fingers back inside you.

A groan pours from you as you close your eyes, “Shut up, Harrington, you know you’re hot.”

He licks your jaw, then nips at it gently before pressing his lips against your ear, “I know I am. I didn’t know you thought so, too.”

God, you wish you could see his face— to remind you how much you really think so. You know he’s still wearing that dumb sailor hat he hates so much and you haven’t had the guts to tell him he looks cute in it. He adds a third finger and the stretch of it has you crying out. Steve fucking tsks, tells you, “Just wait until I get my cock inside you.”

“Do it,” you plead, pushing your ass back against him desperately.

He nips at your jaw again, fingers leaving you abruptly as he grips his cock and guides his tip towards your hole. Once you feel it prodding, you inhale sharply. He slips the tip in, stretching you beautifully— almost has you in tears but he goes slow. Allows you to adjust to every inch as he mouths at your jaw and neck.

You feel like you're melting, hands gripping the counter as he sheathes himself inside you to the hilt. He’s completely inside you, hands clinging onto your hips as your walls grip and pulse around his cock.

“Oh, fuck,” you whine out, “You’re so fucking big.”

He groans, right against your ear and mumbles, “I told you���”

Everything is fuzzy. Scoops Ahoy! doesn’t exist. You’re in space with Steve’s impressive cock buried inside you, not in the mall where there’s a potential to be seen. He thrusts forward hard and deep, making you yelp. He grabs your jaw, turns your face towards him and kisses you sloppily, silencing your involuntary noises. He tastes sweet, like the maraschino cherries he snacks on. You wonder if you taste like the ice cream sundae he made you for your break. You try to think about when he slid it to you and said he made it with love. Which is easy to forget as he rolls his hips, cock dragging against your sensitive walls.

“You’re so tight,” he babbles out.

You reply with, “you’re so big…”

“Feel good, yeah? Me stretching you out?”

“So… fucking… good,” you give in, gasping into the sideways kiss as he delivers a hard and deep thrust.

Steve’s hands reach around, cupping your breasts over your uniform and you wish you weren’t at work— but somewhere where he could feel you up, completely exposed. This will have to do, though. He kisses your neck sloppily, repetitively across the expanse of it that his lips can reach. Small, quiet moans falling past your lips, hopefully muffled by the tinny speakers playing easy listening throughout the mall.

“Oh, god, Steve…” you whine, hips jutting into the counter from the force of his thrusts.

His hands knead against your chest as he presses his face against the crook of your neck and breathes, rugged and heavy. He picks up his pace a bit more and you know he’s close, so you shove your hand down between you and the counter. Get your fingers pressed to your clit and rub circles, mirroring the rhythm of Steve’s thrusts. The feeling of his breath against your neck is surprisingly pleasant. You focus hard on reaching your climax, luckily getting there before Steve. Unfortunately, you can’t keep your volume under control as you moan. Feel too good to really care, even. Steve whines from the sound, pulling out of you quick and then you feel thick, hot ropes of cum landing on your exposed ass.

Then the pair of you stay still, awkwardly— just panting. You turn your head to look back at him as he uses his apron to clean the mess on your skin. It makes you laugh, which causes Steve to smile and laugh. He’s got his shorts back up and he moves to pull your underwear up. Then you turn and look at him. He chews his bottom lip, staring back at you.

“I uh, forgot to ask you earlier but, could you give me a ride home tonight?” you ask, cheeks red in embarrassment.

“Oh, yeah, for sure,” he nods, looking as awkward as you feel.

You grab onto the collar of his uniform and suggest, “Maybe we could hang out at your place for a bit, first?”

Steve grins, gorgeous white teeth on display and he puts his hands on your hips, leans down and says, “Yeah, that could be fun.” before he plants a kiss on your lips.

[pathologicalreid]

gemini | S.R.

two emotionally wrought people collide at a wedding, and a sexual escapade ensues.

part two

who? spencer reid x fem!reader category: smut (18+ mdni) content warnings: softdom!spencer, use of the term "good girl" (i couldn't help myself), unprotected sex, reader on bc, alcohol, spoilers for 14x15 truth or dare, lowkey idiots in love, fucking against a wall?, fingering, heavy petting, r has an oral fixation, r is wearing a dress and makeup, explicit consent (hot), public sex, i think that's all word count: 3.42k a/n: this is a little self-indulgent and i don't care! based on literally just the first line of the song gemini by del water gap. probably not ever gonna get a part two. i've never done angsty smut (smangst?) before, so this was fun.

so, here's the setting, we met fucked up at a wedding

Swirling the drink you held in your hand, you watched your friends as they chatted. The pink liquid in the cup, concocted by Penelope Garcia, was far too sweet for your taste, but you needed the liquid courage to make it through the wedding.

It wasn’t that you weren’t happy for Krystall and Dave. It was that weddings oftentimes left a bitter taste in your mouth – one so bitter that not even Penelope’s drink could offset it.

In your periphery, you saw a blur of purple in the corner, looking up to see Spencer. His hand still bandaged from his most recent brush with death, he used his free one to grip a glass of water. Raising your eyebrows, you gave him your best attempt at a smile before you greeted him, “You look good, Dr. Reid.”

He was fully donned in his favorite color, and you tried to pretend that you didn’t notice that your dress matched the purple hue of his suit. “Thanks,” he said shortly, not quite meeting your eyes.

Noting the way he was looking past you, you demurely leaned your head down, glancing over your shoulder so that you could see what he was looking at, only to see JJ. She looked gorgeous in her red dress, laughing at something her husband said before her eyes caught something.

She was staring back at Spencer, and not for the first time, you found yourself wondering what happened in that pawn shop. Bringing your eyes back up to Reid, you watched the confused look in his eyes bloom as he peeled his eyes away from JJ.

Sick of it, you spoke up, “Alright, I had dibs on being the mopey one tonight. What’s wrong?” You had wanted to brush it off as long-lasting nerves from the hostage situation, but he was acting strange.

You knew you weren’t his best friend, that was a title that JJ had been the reigning champion of since the beginning of time. Yet, you still noticed the rigidity in Spencer’s shoulders as he displayed a clear discomfort with his surroundings. You tried to think of something to say to him. How could you ask him if he wanted to get out of here without it sounding like a sexual proposition?

“JJ told me she loved me,” he said, his voice so low you weren’t even sure you had heard him correctly.

Your head snapped up, “Oh.” Swallowing thickly, you tilted your head curiously, letting loose hair tumble to the side. “Do you love her?” Likely not the right conversation for the wedding of everyone’s favorite right-person-wrong-time couple, but you were desperate for a rope to pull yourself out of your wallowing.

He took a sip of his water before setting the empty glass on the bar counter, “I did.” The admission hit you like a ton of bricks, until her continued, “but now…”

Filling in the blanks, you shrugged, “She’s married. They have kids.” Spencer was always doing the right thing, so pushing his feelings aside for the sake of JJ’s family made the most sense.

Furrowing his brows, he pondered this for a moment before speaking, “It’s not just that. I have feelings for someone else.”

“Oh,” you repeated, and somehow the thought of him being in love with an unfamiliar figure hurt more than him being in love with your mutual friend.

The both of you let the conversation lag, watching as Penelope came back up to the bar and poured more drinks. After she accused you of being boring for not wanting another drink, everyone returned to the tables. “Have you dated anyone since him?”

You choked on your newly acquired water, cupping your hand underneath your jaw in an attempt to stop water from getting on your dress. “Uh, no. I’ve kind of sworn off dating ever since,” you replied, shaking your hand out and letting water droplets fall to the floor.

Sighing, you slouched in your seat, remembering that all you’d ever be was a jaded bride. Left by your fiancé on the day of your wedding, doomed to never love again. Until you met Spencer Reid.

“For everyone?” Spencer asked, and you cursed his natural curiosity.

His question caught you off guard. Despite yourself, you shook your head, “I have like… one person who, if they asked me, I’d say yes.” Your skin started to feel warm, and you weren’t sure if it was your proximity to him or Penelope’s drink coming back with a vengeance.

Spencer stepped a little closer to you, leaning casually on the counter as if he wasn’t affecting your ability to focus. “Who’s your person?” The question was innocent enough that it made your heart ache.

“It doesn’t matter, he’s into someone else,” you told him, reaching behind your neck to pull your hair up, haphazardly twisting it. You didn’t have a hair tie, so you let the locks fall once you felt some semblance of relief.

This statement seemingly bothered Spencer because he looked into his glass, “Did he tell you that?”

Nodding, you chewed on the inside of your lip. “Yeah,” maybe not in so many words, Spencer was rarely crass enough to say he was into someone, but you understood well enough.

The conversation lagged between the two of you once again, your own private thoughts were only interrupted when the music changed. It was a slow song, one for the couples of the night to dance to.

You took a chance, “Do you want to go explore the building with me? It’s getting stuffy in here,” you said, taking one final swig of your water before jumping up from your stool.

He looked back at JJ, who was there with Will, and then forward to the girl who was asking to take him away, “Yes.”

David Rossi had spared no expense for his second wedding to his third wife, and the manor that you found yourself meandering within felt never-ending. Something about following Spencer as he led the way and told you facts about the history of the building felt so normal, and you wondered if it would hurt when the night was over. Maybe this would just end as another memory to loathe about weddings.

Trailing him into another room, you stumbled into his back. Quickly, Spencer spun back and caught you before you could fall to the ground.

Steadying yourself, your heart thrummed at the way he was touching you, tightly holding your waist so that you wouldn’t trip. Once you were no longer wobbling, Spencer reached up and gingerly lifted the fallen spaghetti strap of your dress back over your shoulder. Before you had fully thought out your actions, you leaned up on your tip toes and kissed him.

It was hesitant and gentle, but once you registered that you were kissing him you soon realized that he was kissing you back. What started out as a small peck on the lips quickly morphed into full, open-mouthed kisses.

You thought Spencer might eat you alive, and for a moment, you thought you might let him.

Without separating your lips, he herded you over to the wall, pinning your hips to the wall as you felt heat grow between your legs.

Pulling at your bottom lip with his teeth, Spencer pulled away ever so slightly, your faces just inches apart. “Is this okay?” He asked you, his eyes flickering down to your lips like he was holding himself back from kissing you again.

There was fear. A fear that if you moved forward tonight, nothing would ever be the same, but you took a chance  and nodded quickly, “Yes.”

Your answer acted as a release as Spencer dropped his head back down and the two of you reattached your lips. Despite your attempts to ignore it, you felt his hardened length pressing into you through several layers of clothes.

Twisting your head away, you gasped as Spencer took the opportunity to place his lips on your neck, gently suckling on the tender skin as you tried to catch your breath. “Are you sure about this?” You breathed, running your hands underneath his suit jacket, wanting nothing more than to push it off of him.

“Yes,” he answered, giving you the same consent that you had already given him, and it was enough for you to reach for his belt buckle. No matter how badly you wanted to see him entirely bare in front of you, this just wasn’t the place for it.

Gently, you slid your hand down his front, savoring the way his breath hitched against your neck as your fingertips precariously lifted the waistband of his boxers. He gently nipped at your earlobe as you wrapped your hand around the base of his cock.

You let your head fall backward, allowing him better access to your neck as you moved your hand. Moving your hand up so that you could swipe your thumb over the tip.

You dragged your other hand down, pulling his boxers down so that you could get a good look at what you were working with, and biting your lip at the sight of it. Slowly, you started to pump his impressive length, noting how his breathing patterns changed with your movements.

Dragging a knuckle up the underside of him, he dropped his head to your shoulder as you collected his pre-cum on your index finger on your way up, bringing your hand up to your mouth and licking the droplet off, peering up at him.

“You’re so good at that, baby,” he told you, sighing as he reached up and placed his hand on the side of your neck, skimming his thumb over your jawline as his free hand started to make its way up your dress, pausing when he only met bare skin. “No underwear?” He questioned, furrowing his brow at you as you bit your lip, trying to refrain from pressing into his hand.

Whimpering almost indiscriminately, you shook your head, “Couldn’t, panty lines would show under the dress.”

Spencer hummed in recognition, moving his hand up to cup your sex so that you could feel your own wetness on his hand. A pathetic whine escaped your throat as your walls clenched with need, still stopping yourself from grinding on his hand. “What do you need?” He asked, a teasing lilt in his voice, “Come on, you can tell me.”

“You, please,” you answered, your voice dangerously bordering on pleading. “Your hands, anything,” you squeaked out, breathing heavily as you awaited his next move.

Gently, he slipped a finger inside your wet hole, causing you to release a satisfied sigh. “You’re so wet,” he whispered in your ear as you tilted your head back and pressed your lips to his.

As his hand picked up in pace, so did your breathing. With each movement of his hand, you struggled to keep your volume at a respectable level, small whimpers continued escaping you even as you bit down on the inside of your lip. “Spence,” you whined, moaning aloud as he slipped a second finger into you, “Oh, god.”

The silence of the room around you only exacerbated the wet sounds that were emanating from your sex, and if it didn’t feel so good, you might’ve been embarrassed. In fact, as you felt a familiar coil winding in your abdomen, you found that you didn’t have the capacity to feel anything other than pleasure.

Crying out, you nodded as Spencer continued to thrust his fingers in and out of you, “Fuck,” you said, caring less about your volume levels. Even less so when he responded by pressing the heel of his hand against your clit, the pressure proving to be enough to send you over the edge.

“It’s okay,” Spencer whispered in your ear, “Let it go for me, baby.” His words continued as you felt your walls spasming around his fingers, his ministrations had slowed, but he worked you through your orgasm before withdrawing his fingers and lifting them up to your mouth.

Accepting the invitation, you leaned forward and sucked the sweet juices off of his hand, slipping your tongue between his two fingers as you looked up at him. You half expected him to be watching you with lust-blown eyes, but he was watching you just as attentively as he had when you started this escapade.

He retrieved his fingers from your mouth with a satisfying pop and reached down to ruche the fabric of your dress up around your waist. “Wait,” he said suddenly, gripping the silky cloth, “I don’t have a condom.”

Your eyes widened and you shook your head, “I don’t mind.” Still breathing heavy from your previous orgasm, you shook your head again, “I mean. I’m on birth control – and I’m good at it. I mean I keep up with it.” Now babbling, you hoped he’d say something. “I’m clean. I trust you.”

Nodding in understanding, he placed a hand on the side of your neck and looked at you intently. “I’m not going to do anything until you catch your breath,” he told you, taking up an authoritative tone.

Blinking rapidly, you evened out your breathing as he ran his hand up and down your torso, “I’m sorry,” you whispered, taking another deep breath as you looked up at him.

Spencer shook his head, “Don’t be sorry.” He leaned his head down, pressing soft kisses down the side of your neck as you finally pushed his jacket off of his shoulders. “You’re so pretty,” he murmured, leaning down to grip the backs of your thighs.

“It’s okay if you can’t lift me,” you rambled quickly, getting his attention as you aired your concern.

He raised his eyebrows expectantly, pressing his hips into yours and lifting your feet off of the ground. The leverage that he had, along with the support of the wall behind him, allowed him to get both of your feet off of the ground. You would’ve spent more time being impressed by this feat if you weren’t so distracted by his painfully hard cock that had now slipped between your folds.

Leaning down, you desperately kissed his lips, wanting him to give you those open-mouthed kisses that you had started out with. Instead, you cried out when, without warning, his full length slipped into you.

Placing gentle kisses on your collarbone, Spencer murmured, “Are you okay?” He whispered, seeming like he was using all of his self-control to just stay still.

You nodded, feeling his cock throbbing so deep in you that you were almost afraid you’d come from just that pressure alone. “Been a while,” you murmured, taking a deep, shaky breath.

He hummed in understanding, “I’ve got you, take your time.”

His words filled your stomach with butterflies, and it wasn’t just because he was fully sheathed in you. “Spence,” you whimpered, “Move.”

On your cue, Spencer gave a tentative thrust, permitting your resulting moan to mix with his grunt. “Fuck, baby,” he said, continuing to thrust in and out of your cunt, filling the room with the crude squelching of your actions. “I’m not going to last long,” he informed you.

Throwing your head back in ecstasy, you moaned helplessly when Spencer dropped one of your legs to the ground, hooking his arm underneath your other knee, providing a new, deeper angle. You swore as the sensations started to feel overwhelming.

The new angle gave him more control over his movements, enabling him to use his free hand to pull at your breast through the fabric of your dress. As you tugged gently at his hair, you tilted your head back, “Spence, I- shit,” you cursed, recognizing the tell-tale signs of your second orgasm approaching.

If it weren’t for his words of encouragement, you would’ve been embarrassed by coming too quickly, and if anything, the words only spurred you closer to the finish line. “Come for me,” he said, thrusting harder into you as he tried to reach the same point. “Let me know how good I make you feel,” he said, continuing his thrusts until his hips stuttered.

“Coming,” you whimpered, dropping your head forward onto his shoulder as you felt your walls tightening around his hard length. Crying out as he continued to pound into you, you buried your face into his neck and nipped at the skin to muffle your sounds.

Now he was solely working toward his own orgasm, having given you two of your own. “You’re such a good girl,” he panted.

Suckling gently at the skin on his neck – not hard enough to leave a mark, you littered kisses on his sensitive skin. “Come in me, baby,” you murmured, trying to spur him on.

Your success was apparent as his movements faltered and his cock started throbbing, feeling the pulses of his cum as it filled you, your eyes rolled back at the feeling while Spencer slowed to a halt, waiting for a beat before he pulled out of you entirely.

Shuddering at the emptiness you now felt, you leaned against the wall once both of your feet were on the ground. As your legs trembled, you watched as Spencer crouched to fish something out of his jacket, leaving you with your mixture of fluids running down your legs.

As he grabbed the handkerchief from his breast pocket, you gasped slightly as you realized his intentions. “Spence, you’ll ruin it,” you insisted.

“Would you rather go back out there with my cum dripping down your thighs?” He asked, knelt in front of you with his brows raised in mock innocence.

Swallowing thickly, you shook your head, “Jesus.”

He chuckled, using the handkerchief to wipe up the mess the two of you had made on your legs before carelessly tossing it into a nearby trashcan. Noting the way your legs were still shaking, he lifted your chin ever so slightly, “Are you alright?”

Nodding, you offered him a tired, but genuine smile. “I’m great,” you told him, wiping underneath your eyes where you were sure there was a mess of mascara.

Taking your hand in his, as if it was the most normal thing in the world, Spencer led to toward the French doors that led to the balcony, taking you out into the fresh air.

As you leaned up against the railing, Spencer shook out his jacket and draped it over your shoulders, doing his best to keep you comfortable. “Hey,” you whispered, “I really am fine. Are you? How’s your hand?” In all of the hormones, you had forgotten about his injury.

Spencer nodded, looking over the property that Rossi had rented. “I’m good, Y/N. I feel good.” You wished he’d call you baby again, but maybe that was too much to ask for. His eyebrows furrowed.

“What are you thinking about?” You asked him, recognizing the look from years of working together.

He hummed, reaching up and sweeping a strand of hair off of your forehead. “That guy? The one who told you he’s into someone else? I can confidently say he’s an idiot.”

Flushing, you smiled to yourself at the fact that Spencer was calling himself an idiot, especially when he was anything but. Shrugging, you waved him off anyway, “Nobody’s perfect, Spence.”

“No, I suppose not, but even so…” he told you, allowing his voice to trail off like he wasn’t totally sure what he wanted to say to you. “If he can’t see what’s right in front of him, then maybe you need to turn your attention elsewhere.”

Sighing, you leaned your chin in your hand, “Thanks, but I don’t know. Maybe there is better out there, and I’m just not worth it.” No, after tonight, you’d likely never get over him. It might’ve started as a workplace crush, but you felt in your heart that it was now something deeper.

Spencer shook his head, “Now, that’s where we disagree.”

“Spencer, I can’t-“ Your voice is cut off when you hear someone calling your name from inside the building, smoothing out the front of your dress one more time, you step back into the room, coming face to face with JJ.

She smiles in recognition of you, but the grin immediately fades from her face when Spencer walks out behind you, “Hey, we’ve been looking for you guys,” she said flatly. “They’re about to cut the cake.”

Nodding, you took another quick look at Spencer before following the blonde out of the room, leaving your secret in the room behind you.

part two