#Szeth is a cat

[stormscience]

Urithiru: World's Most Expensive Cat Tree

@blindradiant helped me realize something. If Szeth is a cat (which, let's be real, he has The Most cat energy ever), and he was the first to Urithiru, then wasn't he just being a cat and finding the highest spot he could perch on? Which means Urithiru is just a giant cat tree?

[azura-aurorae]

Szeth-son-son-Vallano, Truthless of Shinovar, wore white on the day he was to kill a king…

[the-commonplace-book]

i gotta draw knights radient as miraculous holders. i gotta

[blindradiant]

What does it say about me as a person that a man who fits all of these categories is my  blorbo

✅ tortured by Voices

✅ cursed by god

✅ small waist

✅ criminal record

✅ died once

Diagnosis: babygirl

[brothermouse-skeleton]

Szeth-son-son-Vallano, Truthless of Shinovar: (going to work wearing a cute little all white outfit)

Me:(a Schrodinger's Cat of reading the situation) Yes! Go! Slay, King!

[cosmerelists]

Cosmere characters, it's Halloween! What are you dressing up as?

We're imagining for the moment that, you know, they have Halloween.

Painter: I'm dressing up as a guy who forgot his costume.

Painter: What? It works.

Steris: I have done research into which costume is the correct amount of spooky while still possessing a modicum of dignity.

Steris: I am a witch.

Steris: And since witches are properly in trios, Wax and Wayne are witches too!

Wax: I can make the cauldron shake with my allomancy!

Wayne: I'm just here to frighten children, dearie!

Raoden: Zombie.

Raoden: Kinda felt like I had to.

Lightsong: I'm pretending to be a god!

Llarimar: You ARE a god.

Lightsong: That's the spirit!

Marasi: Like many women, I'm dressed as the Ascendant Warrior.

Marasi: I suggested that Allik dress as the Last Emperor, but he said that "white is very bad for someone who works with chocolate."

Renarin: I'm dressed as an ardent.

Renarin: Eating candy is in character!

MeLaan: I got glowing bones. People aren't really sure what I'm supposed to be, but they ARE freaked out!

Adolin: Shallan and I have a couple's costume! We're a horse!

Shallan: Adolin is the butt, of course. Because pooping.

Adolin: We look awesome! But Kaladin is avoiding us, for some reason.

Sadeas: Me? Oh, I'm dressed as a fossil.

Dalinar: ...Is that my uniform?

Szeth: I am a ghost. Boo.

Szeth: ...I feel most comfortable in white.

Nightblood: I'm dressed as Vasher!

Nightbood: I have this tattered cloth wrapped around me, but I'm mostly selling with my grumpy expression.

Vasher: You don't have a face.

Nightblood: Grumble, grumble. No destroying evil for you! Grump. Grump!

Vasher: ...I do NOT sound like that.

Blushweaver: I dressed up as a cat! Meow!

Lightsong: You are LITERALLY wearing lingerie and cat ears.

Blushweaver: Yup! 💗

Kaladin: I was going to dress as the storm itself--or maybe Fleet or something--but apparently Syl asked my mom to make me a costume and she did.

Kaladin: ...

Kaladin: I'm a pumpkin.

Hesina: And what an adorable pumpkin you make, too!

Hesina: I could NOT be happier!

Syl: I told it'd be awesome!!

Kaladin: ...

Kaladin: Happy Halloween, I guess.

[mayatuks-catastrophe]

rip Szeth-son-son-Vallano, Truthless of Shinovar, you would have loved 2000's emo warrior cats amvs

[sniffanimal]

anyways welcome to the marketplace of ideas. my mind palace. help me assign furries to the stormlight cast. let's assume all earthly creatures since it'll get a little repetitive if all we have to pick from are crab-adjacent. please offer suggestions for even ones I picked bc genuinely I'm settled on none of these

so far I've got: (no overt spoilers here, maybe extremely mild implied ones. I won't be able to promise replies are spoiler free)

shallan: cuttlefish, maybe a spider?

kaladin: bird of some type, thinking a peregrine falcon? I have to do more research on bird symbolism to pick a good one

adolin: horse I mean come on. maybe a dog (German shepherd/golden retriever mix??)

renarin: I'm of two minds on if all the kholins should be dogs. but if not then he's a kitty cat. a tortoiseshell long hair. if dog then a silky shepherd and just awful at Shep things

szeth: sheep of course. no other choice exists

wit: crow, or maybe whichever one I don't pick for shallan,

Jasnah: if dog, then borzoi or some other sighthound. if not, then maybe a secretary bird?

Dalinar: some masculine dog. gshep or doberman or something.

Evi: golden retriever

gavilar: staffy or Pitt, or whatever Dalinar is

Navani: if dog, then greyhound/iggy. if not, then maybe... idk I need help here. probably a bird, maybe an African grey?. her, Jasnah, and elhokar might escape the dog kholin curse

elhokar: I like him being a doggy tho. especially with how he feels about kaladin, maybe a hunting breed of some purport? to kind of go along with a Falcon

moash: extremely a falcon, especially a big raptory hunting one.

rlain: I am leaning towards something non-mammalian/avian for singers et al. Maybe use arthropods for them? Rlain can be a beetle, and different types for different forms.

Raboniel: scorpion

venli: firefly

lopen: ferret/weasel

Sylphrena: bluejay

pattern: some sort of branching coral or slime mold. something esoteric

lift: goat

sadeas: really fluffy and round Persian cat

[awindandtruthliveblog]

I finished my reread a little late, but it does keep things in mind fresh from RoW. We've got Ishi doing weird spren transfers, Ba-Ado-Mishram probably getting released, Shallan and Kaladin in much better places, Szeth, uhh, "cleansing" his people, El with anti-Light tech, Moash alive but blind, Taravangian recently ascended (his newness is gonna be bad for him I'm sure) (also Cultivation might have some power over him now), Dalinar setting the terms of the fight, Maya reawakening, and Syl becoming very human. I probably missed a lot, but there's a lot going on. And we only have ten days!

It's nice to see the last Heralds, finally. Our boy Taln, wish we could see his physique though. Battah... exists. She's not mentioned much, huh? Cultivation, enigmatic as ever, but so imposing in this art. She's even got her cat, the Nightwatcher. And there's Honor! Didn't expect to see him in any form, let alone alive.

Acknowledgements and "Other book by Brandon" are both so full now. It really takes a team to make these, they all deserve so much praise. Noting the "Amputee and prosthetics expert", but it's hard to imagine anyone getting injured like that, with Edgedancers around and Radiant healing. I'm assuming a new character, but there's always the chance it's Adolin, our one non-Radiant.

Skipping the art descriptions, but the Parts are gone, kinda. Fun!

[bisexual-little-lad]

HOLY SHIT I HAVE POLLS NOW

[idontknowanametouse]

Ok so. I got a few spoilers on Stormlight and am at the end of WoR. And I want Szeth to have a found family so bad bitches (affectionate) you have no fucking idea. I want him to be loved and love back and build trust and true bonds and be around people that don't want him to be their slave and just be friends. Szeth is a pathetic little meow meow a sad wet cat and I need to fucking hug him.

[bedeliabestiebracket]

Is there a bracket image or a list of characters?

There’ll be a bracket image starting round two because that’s when the polls will be between two characters so it’s easier to make one of those. Here’s a list of the characters in the current polls

Piotr Rasputin/Sherlock Holmes/Mo Ran

Paul/Miss Honey/Ms. Valerie Frizzle

Nona/Paddington/Son Goku

Party Poison/Misty Quigley/Xie Lian

Juniper Woods/Szeth/Plixie

Barack Obama/Grian/Rick Shades

Jon arbuckle/Baymax/Adam savage

Lelouch Lamperouge/Rita [REDACTED]/Peridot

Rodrick Heffley/Ron F. Stampler/Wedge

Toriel/The toy soldier/Sophie Hatter

Miles Morales/Thing/Wall-e

Sylphrenia/Nimona/Team Rocket

The Cheshire Cat/The Moth/Qi Xiaotian

Thor/Xavier/Winnie the pooh

Robin Buckley/Spock/Ted Lasso

Yog-Sothoth/Tony Thompson/Sister Mary Loquacious

[lasersheith]

Szethadin fic is gonna go something like this

Kal: wow you've never... I mean... Never???

Szeth: while everyone else was being horny teenagers, I studied the blade

Kal, internally: well I can't not fuck him

Syl, also there: you gotta

Kal jumps 10 feet in the air like a cat that accidentally touched tin foil

[sebarial-the-economist]

Book 1: Szeth is a murderer, an assassin. He started a war. Bad Szeth *spray him with a squirt bottle as if he's a cat*

Book 4: Die Gavilar you ass! Oh good, here comes that weird bald dude to do a public service. Just in time!

every time i’m reading and navani says she’s not a scholar the urge to give szeth a trophy, medal and round of applause grows stronger

[cosmerelists]

Why Every Stormlight Character Is Secretly A Cat

Or, you know, as many of them as I can fit into one reasonably sized list!

1. Kaladin: Likes to be high

Kaladin-Kitty: (purring happily on the very tallest cat tree ever)

Hapless Cat-Parent: Yup, he loves being tall!

Hapless Cat-Parent: Hardly ever touches the floor if he can help it!

2. Lift: Knows that YOUR food is simply better

Hapless Cat-Parent: S-Stop trying to steal my pancakes!

Hapless Cat-Parent: You HAVE food!

3. Lopen: Sometimes hurts people when he only meant to play around

Hapless Cat-Parent: Ow!! No biting!!!

Hapless Cat-Parent: I-It’s okay! You know I’ll protect you, even if you hurt me.

4. Lewshi: Likes to Play-Fight

Hapless Cat-Parent: Ha, ha yeah! Lewshi LOVES to wrestle with the other kitties.

Hapless Cat-Parent: Never with murderous intent, of course! She just loves a good play-fight!

5. Szeth: Can see ghosts

Szeth-Kitty: (staring unblinking at a spot across the room)

Hapless Cat-Parent: W-What do you see with your kitty eyes?!?

6. Syl: Sometimes gets the zoomies

Hapless Cat-Parent: Ha, yeah, she loves to race about like this!

Hapless Cat-Parent: Especially when it’s stormy out, for some reason.

7. Nale: Likes the hunt

Nale-Kitty: (laser-focused, butt wiggling)

Hapless Cat-Parent: That stuffed mouse will never escape you!

8. Renarin: Is autistic (since, you know, all cats are autistic)

Hapless Cat-Parent: I just don’t understand people who think cats are hard to read!

Hapless Cat-Parent: All we gotta do is pay attention to your body language, huh, bud?

9. Rock: Knows the importance of cooking

Hapless Cat-Parent: Making biscuits again, huh?

10. Shallan: SUCH a little faker sometimes

Shallan: (the most mournful of kitty cries)

Hapless Cat-Parent: Y-You can’t trick me! I KNOW I already fed you!!

11. Tien: Brings you presents when you’re sad

Hapless Cat-Parent: B-brought me another rock, huh?

Hapless Cat-Parent: Thanks, buddy. I love it.

12. Stormfather: Knocks things over and pretends it wasn’t his fault

Hapless Cat-Parent: H-Hey! Did you knock EVERYTHING off my shelf?!

Stormfather-Kitty: (innocently cleaning his tail)

Hapless Cat-Parent: Uh-HUH.

13. Pattern: Will cockblock you at any opportunity

Romantic Partner: Uh, your cat’s creepy, unblinking gaze is kinda killing the mood here.

Hapless Cat-Parent: Yeah...he does that.

14. Sebarial: Knows the importance of conserving your energy

Hapless Cat-Parent: Napping in the sunshine, huh?

Hapless Cat-Parent: You sure live the good life.

15. Rlain: Changes forms when he needs to

Hapless Cat-Parent: Wow! You’re all poofed up!

Hapless Cat-Parent: You look so big and scary! That dog outside is definitely intimidated. 

16. Rysn: Is not afraid to jump from very high places

Hapless Cat-Parent: Ha ha! Thank goodness cats always land on their feet!

(I’m sorry)

17. Moash: Does NOT accept that humans should be in charge

Hapless Cat-Parent: Oh sweet Moash-kitty, sometimes you stare at me like you’re plotting my demise.

Hapless Cat-Parent: ...Sometimes I think I’m lucky you don’t have thumbs.

18. Cord: “Father, I crave violence.”

19. Navani: A very curious kitty

Hapless Cat-Parent: Yes, yes, I know you must sniff every one of these groceries.

Hapless Cat-Parent: Such an investigative little kitty!

20. Jasnah: Respect must be earned

Human Amaram: I am COVERED in SCRATCHES

Hapless Cat-Parent: You can’t force a cat to like you, you know.

21. Venli: Can’t decide what she wants

Venli-kitty: (mournful meows)

Hapless Cat-Parent: Oh? You want the door open?

Venli-kitty: (mournful meows)

Hapless Cat-Parent: O-Oh? You want it closed now?

Venli-kitty: (ever more mournful meows)

Hapless Cat-Parent: Make up your mind, already!

22. Eshonai: Adapts to communicate with humans

Hapless Cat-Parent: Huh! It says here that adult cats only meow to communicate with humans!

Hapless Cat-Parent: ...Is that your excuse for singing the song of your people every morning at 3:00am, then?

23. Elhokar: Pretends it was all on purpose

Hapless Cat-Parent: Hanging upside down from a claw snag again, huh?

Hapless Cat-Parent: Yes, yes, I’m sure you meant to do that.

24. Dalinar: HATES closed doors

Dalinar-Kitty: (vigorous scratching)

Hapless Cat-Parent: Yes, yes, I’d hate to interrupt your journey to the bathroom.

25. Teft: Shows affection by staying at your side

Hapless Cat-Parent: You’re so sweet, Teft-kitty.

Hapless Cat-Parent: You may be grumpy, but you’re always sitting next to me when I’m sad.

26. Thaidakar: Best not to let him get out

Hapless Cat-Parent: Ha, ha, of COURSE I don’t let my cat outside!

Hapless Cat-Parent: Thaida-kat would destroy the whole ecosystem if he got out.

27. Adolin: Looks great in his little outfits

Adolin-kitty: (purring contentedly)

Hapless Cat-Parent: Yeah, and ever since I put him in that little sweater, he won’t let me take it off!

Hapless Cat-Parent: Such a fashion icon.