#So sorry for all the shit you must have read in order to need to do this thread OP and afterwards too
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
cluescorner ¡ 7 months ago
Text
I cannot imagine being a Damian stan right now. You've got both Zdarsky's bullshit (where he clearly doesn't give a shit about your boy) and The Boy Wonder (where Juni Ba clearly gives so many shits about your boy) coming out on the same day. The whiplash must be insane. I hope y'all get some nice warm soup for your efforts jfc
#damian wayne#damian al ghul#damian al ghul wayne#batman#batfamily#for all of the issues that come with having Steph as your fave having too much wild shit happening at once is never one of them#btw I quite like The Boy Wonder Issue 1. wow shocker an artist and writer who I have liked everything they've ever done#has once again written something that I am enjoying with art that makes me want to be part of its world.#it's almost like Juni Ba is really freaking talented or something#like I have some problems with it but it seems like many of those are part of the point. Damian is learning that his siblings are more#three-dimensional than he realized and that is part of this 'coming of age' story merged with fairytale#so I can't be mad at the oversimplistic defining of Dick and Jason and Tim until the conclusion of the series. that might be the point.#I hope that the series will address Steph as a Robin but if not then frankly it's not an issue unique to this series.#I'll be annoyed and disappointed but ultimately roll with it like I am with Babsgirl being here. There's too much good stuff here to get#hung up on shit that seems to be almost an editorial mandate at this point. at least that's where I'm at.#I am also very sorry that Chip Zdarsky is massacring your boy. he has 'X (Tim for him) is the best Robin so everyone else must suck' diseas#where a writer really likes one specific Robin and in trying to uplift them demeans all of the other Robins. instead of like...just writing#for that one character only or alternatively not demeaning the other characters in order to make his blorbo look good#it's wild because I actually think his writing for Tim is pretty solid. but he's not writing a Tim series. he's writing a Batman series.#and if you are going to write a Batman series and include other Batfamily members you need to actually write them well.#instead of assigning them like 2 personality traits while Tim gets to be a whole character#I accept that behavior in fanfic where I have lesser standards because it's fucking free. not a comic run that wants me to pay#tens of dollars in order to understand what the fuck is going on. he's been going for a while now it's gotta be a lot of money.#I can buy Steelworks with that money. I can see John Henry and Natasha Irons in a trade. Fuck you Chip.#it's why it takes such a special person to write a good ensemble story/a good Batfamily story. you have to be good at writing a LOT#of different characters. which I don't think most people are. I sure as hell am not. I can write maybe 3 at a time confidently well.#and you also have to give all of them at least SOME love or else people will be upset that you aren't focusing on their fave#and also the writing as a whole will suffer. Chip Zdarsky is a pretty good Tim writer. I'd maybe read a Tim solo written by him.#I would not read a story focusing on multiple characters that I like written by Chip Zdarsky. because every character who isn't Tim#is at least a bit weak/inconsistent/out of character INCLUDING FUCKING BATMAN. THE NO. 1 GUY MOST ARE HERE FOR
86 notes ¡ View notes
nonokoko13 ¡ 11 months ago
Text
Why can't people like a celebrity without imagine them as queer? Can't people like Taylor music without go saying she's lesbian/queer when she hasn't said anything about that. Pretty sure if she was attracted to women she would have already said it 🫠
Even in the hypothetical scenario where she was queer indeed pressuring somebody to come out or out them yourself is selfish, stupid, dangerous, toxic and overall fucked up (-᷅_-᷄)
We have so many queer pop icons out of the closet but you need to headcanon your favourite ally/het as lgbt for...comfort reasons? Just because she's your fav? Because you are queer? Dude she's not a fictional character can you not spread false information or discuss real people orientations and just enjoy their content 💀
all goofing aside I genuinely don't understand the urge to reimagine Taylor Allison Swift as a secretly queer icon when the pop music scene(TM) is like. literally overflowing with women who actually like women. Gaga and Kesha and Miley and Halsey are right there. Rina Sawayama and Hayley Kiyoko and Rebecca Black and Kehlani and Victoria MonĂŠt and Miya Folick if you're willing to get slightly less top 100. Janelle and Demi for them nonbinary takes on liking girls. like what are we doing here. like I'm not even saying you can't enjoy Taylor but why would you hang all your little gay hopes on her.
#saying this as bi myself btw#WHO SAYS LADY GAGA DOESN'T COUNT AS QUEER JUST BECAUSE SHE'S A BOY KISSER TOO#i'm tired of this shit#please remember that is LGBT+ NOT LGT+#bi/pan folks exist. No need to act like people is either gay or straight and there's no in between when that's clearly *false*!#And even if you aren't lgbt+ I think having this opinion of not giving real people hc sexualities/orientations is still valid#you have too much free time if you're wasting it to theorize about somebody private life while ignoring the very much confirmed queer icons#Plus. If you care sm about somebody sexuality to the point if they aren't what you want them to be you get disappointed/upset#rather than caring more about their work which they produced and you supposedly consume as a self-proclaimed fan...#Are you really a fan of them? I don't think so.#A true fan loves them for who they are or what they produce. Not because for who they feel attracted to#Imagine working your way to the top as a musician or whatever career you pursue and your fans grade your worth or their liking to you#based on who you kiss or sleep with or who you don't 💀#feeling like OOP pfp for real#this is exhausting#Idc less about who Lady Gaga kisses. Yeah having her as bi icon was important to me but if tomorrow she decides to come out as smth else#I'll keep listening her music. Because I like her music. And her personality. And some of her outfits. The end#there are many songs made by women/nb who like women iswtg#you don't need to pretend straight people isn't straight in order to like their music or to like them as a person I promise it's okay 🙏#Also what in the actual fuck is that article??? People seriously get paid for writing that? 💀💀💀💀#So sorry for all the shit you must have read in order to need to do this thread OP and afterwards too#ALSO BATMAN NAME based opinion and good taste hell yeah ✨#the you in all this post only goes to those who think like that btw. If you feel offended the problem is on you#how about taking reading comprehension classes before speaking. Some people are in dire need of it#those who believe a bi is less queer icon than a gay one is in my blacklist. If you come to me with that bs I'll block you on sight
340K notes ¡ View notes
pseudowho ¡ 3 months ago
Text
"...alright. Just the usual ones? Night time too...and tampons. Don't ever apologise. Alright. We'll be home soon. I love you."
The mid-morning traffic, less frantic now than an hour before, shhhaaaahed around the car. From the passenger seat, Yuuji watched Kento with a fascination about to bubble over with suppressed laughter. Kento put the phone down. Yuuji, just a boy, grinned, almost teasingly at Kento.
"Tampons, huh, Nanamin?"
Kento looked to Yuuji, flicking the windscreen wipers on to rid the screen of drifting cherry blossom. His face remained neutral, sincerely questioning. Yuuji scoffed, bold as brass, before continuing.
"Jeez Nanamin...you're such a simp."
Kento's eyes narrowed, searching for meaning. He repeated, slowly, the word unfamiliar upon his tongue.
"...'simp'."
"You'd do anything for her, right?"
"Is that...a bad thing? You say the word, not that I know it, as if it's derogatory."
Kento tapped on his phone, and Yuuji backpedaled, his grin sliding away to a wide-mouthed grimace as he waved his hands in a fit of no, wait, I can explain. Kento appeared to be reading, his face growing dour. He huffed, one short puff of air from his nose. He tucked his phone away.
"Ah-- Nanamin-- I didn't mean--"
"A simp, hmm? Alright. Come along, Yuuji."
They drove. Yuuji bit his nails as he stared out into traffic. Kento was silent, calm.
And Kento took Yuuji on errands.
At the Conbini, Kento collected pads, tampons, snacks and pain relief.
"Do you have any of the night time ones?" Kento asked the assistant, holding up a pack of pads, unashamed, as Yuuji tried to sink into the floor, just a boy. As the assistant walked away, Kento asked Yuuji, calmly.
"Would a simp do this?"
"Ah...jeez, I...yeah, I guess so."
"Alright."
In the Florist's, Kento was meticulous with the sweating assistant, identifying only the finest blooms of your favourite wildflowers. He commandeered, insisting they were wrapped in brown paper, stamped with wax and tied with ribbons. Tapping his fingers on the counter, bored, Yuuji's reverie was once more broken by Kento's smooth timbre.
"Would a simp do this?"
Kento walked up beside Yuuji, with a spray of sweet botanicals in his arms. Yuuji squirmed beneath the schooling.
"Yeah, I...I reckon so. Probably."
"Splendid. Come along."
At the launderette, collecting your repaired jacket; "Would a simp do this?"
At your parents' house, dropping off a birthday card; "Would a simp do this?"
At Jujutsu High, filing some late paperwork for you; "Would a simp do this?"
In the car, calling Ijichi to cancel drinks the following night; "Would a simp do this?"
By the time Kento had completed his errands, Yuuji sulked, just a boy, begrudging how overboard Kento had gone, all because Yuuji had used slang that meant nothing apart from something Kento couldn't understand.
Yuuji stood back in the hallway, shucking his shoes off, as Kento walked ahead.
Yuuji's eyes darted up, to you, shocked to see that you were...a mess. You could hide the tears all you liked, but your puffy lips and salt-sore cheeks told of a whole day of crying. The dinner Yuuji usually enjoyed wasn't made. The fragrant candles that Yuuji usually enjoyed weren't lit. The curtains were closed.
Yuuji felt vicariously guilty for something he had not done, but he listened to yours and Kento's mumbled conversation.
"...sorry...so shit...haven't done anything...needed you...Yuuji must be hungry, I..."
"...shhh...done nothing wrong...Ijichi cancelled tomorrow anyway...order take-out...come here..."
Kento held you in a rustle of bags and brown-papered flowers. He did not begrudge the tear stains on his lapels. He looked at you as though your very blood ran divine, when you gave the flowers and bag of snacks a watery smile, pressing a salty kiss to Kento's cheeks before walking to the kitchen.
As Kento and Yuuji stood back, watching you swipe your tears away before beginning to fill a vase with Kento's wildflowers, Yuuji dawned upon the cusp of a bold new understanding. Kento felt it, this gentle yearning, and took Yuuji by the hand over the horizon.
Kento's voice was, slow, considered, and gut-wrenchingly sincere.
"Never deny yourself the beauty of loving someone without restraint, for the fear of vulnerability, Yuuji. Never let anyone taint the way love should guide and consume you. Because if loving wholeheartedly is weakness...you shouldn't want to be strong."
Yuuji watched the gentle golden thread of joy that Kento had woven through your sadness. He shuffled, his hands in his pockets, his peachy head tilted down as he kicked at his shoes.
"...yeah, I get you. I'll... I'll be a simp too, then. When I find the one. And...and I'll be proud of it."
Kento smiled, pressing a bag of snacks to Yuuji's chest.
"And I'll be proud of you."
6K notes ¡ View notes
charliemwrites ¡ 10 months ago
Text
Part 4 of Mafia!Price
No Content Warnings
Tumblr media
There are many things to appreciate about your boss, but one of them is his respect for routine. You’ve gotten him on a schedule and now he seems happily beholden to it; appreciates your promptness with tea and pastries and morning “briefings” each day.
He’ll happily sit back in his big leather chair and listen to you chatter out his itinerary for the day. Meetings, reports, phone calls. Trips to the dock, now, bless him.
You try not to stare between glances at your tablet. For a rich bastard, he is unfairly handsome. Good taste in just about everything, classy and luxurious without being ostentatious. Old money vibes, for sure, though you know better than to do more than idly wonder. Helps that he’s also remarkably gentlemanly with you. You’re not one to buy into old stereotypes or gender roles, even the ones that benefit you — but you’ll take a chivalrous boss over your old one any day.
Besides, it’s not like he’s spouting off about what women should and shouldn’t be doing. Or trying to use you as an example of an “acceptable” working woman. So, yeah, you’ll indulge in the door-holding and offered arms.
“Alright, best for last — your reservation for Muse is tomorrow. The restaurant is twenty minutes from your penthouse, so Simon will be downstairs by 7:30.”
You check that off your to-do list as you continue speaking.
“Do you have a suit picked out yet, or should I order something? Green is in season and it would go nicely with your eyes.”
He hums; you glance up. Leaning back, one arm lax on the arm of his chair, black watch gleaming. The other is propped to press his index finger against his lips. Like he’s telling you to keep a secret. The corners of his mouth are tilted up.
Your tablet dings and thankfully distracts you from staring.
Oh, for the love of— the only person more inconsiderate than Philip Graves is his damn assistant.
“Is that the color you’re wearing, then?”
Will need to call later today — as if!
“Hm?” You ask, not having caught it.
He arches his eyebrows; ah, you must have been making a face again.
“Are you wearing green tomorrow?” He repeats.
You blink. Are you what?
“Tomorrow, sir?”
He nods, once. “To Muse, luv.”
When you continue to stare with pleasant obliviousness, his eyebrows furrow a bit.
“You do know one of those seats is for you, yeah?”
You press your lips together for a moment. Well… shit. You take it back. You take it all back. John Price is a terrible, horrible, awful man who is so rude.
“I do now.”
Across the office, you make wide eye contact with Gaz. He grimaces in sympathy and ducks his head, though it’s clearly just to hide his traitorous laughter.
“Of course you’re coming along.”
“Sir,” you say, pleasant and sweet, “remember when I first started here? And I told you that I’m not a mind reader?”
“Of course,” he answers. “You threatened to spit in my tea in the same breath.”
“Only if you told me to fetch it for you,” you correct, before continuing, “I feel you may need a reminder: I cannot read your mind. How was I supposed to know you wanted me to go with you?”
“‘S your job, isnit?” He replies. You give him a dark look; he puts his hands up with a chuckle. “My apologies love, I thought you’d be in my pocket next to my handkerchief. Like always.”
You set your hand on your hip, proper cross now.
“It’s outside usual working hours, sir. How could I have possible expected to be invited to your fancy man party?”
“‘Fancy man party’?”
“Well, there’s nothing for it, I’ll have to leave early tomorrow.”
You’re already tapping madly at your tablet, looking up a salon willing to do your hair and makeup. God knows what kind of meltdown you’ll have if you can’t get your eyeliner symmetrical.
“Do whatever you need to do, luv,” Price soothes, standing. “I really am sorry for the short notice.”
You wave him off, then pat his arm as he gently guides you towards the door. Absently, you comply, more focused on getting appointments set and rearranging your own schedule for tomorrow.
“I’ll make it work,” you promise, “I always do.”
You let him bring you all the way to your desk, lower yourself into your ergonomic rolling chair.
“I’ll let you know what color I’m wearing by… one o’clock. Yes?”
“Sounds great, luv.”
You glance at the clock. “Also you have a call with the KorTac Group in ten.”
He chuckles and taps your chin. “Cheers, luv.”
—
Simon is the one to pick you up Friday evening. You both pause in the lobby of your apartment complex, staring.
“You look lovely,” he says at the same time you ask, aghast, “what happened to your face?”
He’s got a dark bruises discoloring the skin around one eye. Clearly some ice has already been applied because the swelling is down, but it must be fresh because he didn’t have it yesterday.
He snorts. “My job happened.”
You tut. “I’ve got something for that but we need to get moving. Mr. Price said he needs some help with his suit.”
You grab his arm without hesitation, habit from any of your escorts or drivers always offering it to you. Usually you accept out of politeness, but tonight you could use the extra stability in your heels. Simon doesn’t seem to mind even though this is the first time you’ve done this.
He walks you to the car, holds the door for you. Sleek and spotless, a black Jaguar — your choice for the evening. You hum in delight at the warm interior as Simon slides into the front seat.
“Oh, thank you for the compliment, by the way,” you add as he pulls into traffic. “You look quite smart as well.”
He grunts, but you notice a bit of color to his ears in the passing streetlights. You smile to yourself and busy yourself with your tablet. Double checking the reservation confirmation, answering messages from Farah and Gaz, updating Price on your ETA.
The car stops at a luxury high rise just at 7. You hop out before Simon can get the door and receive a sharp look. He holds up a reprimanding finger; blink in surprise at the sternness of it.
“You pull that shite again and I’ll handcuff you to the door handle, miss.” He warns. “Making me look bad.”
You huff, amused, and take his arm again. “Don’t threaten me, Mr. Riley, I’m meaner.”
But you squeeze his thick bicep good-naturedly as he leads you into Price’s building. Your boss lives in the penthouse at the very top; Simon has to swipe a card for access. He’s also got a key to let you both in the door, holds it so you can enter first.
It’s all sleek and modern; not at all what you would expect of your boss’s more classical style. His office has a sort of 20s Hollywood vibe (gangster, you teased once) but clearly some interior designer was paid far too much for something out of a drab minimalist catalogue.
You don’t linger long, heels clicking on the polished floors.
“Sir?” you call.
“In here, luv.”
You grimace at the flight of stairs between you and the loft, but force yourself up them. The whole floor is the mater bedroom and it’s the size of your entire apartment. Walk-in closet, sectioned off lounge with a desk. His bathroom door is open, mirror fogged. It smells like soap.
“Bedroom to your right,” he calls.
You tip-tap in and your mouth instantly dries. Price is standing in the middle of the room, half dressed. Nothing unprofessional, no. He’s wearing slacks, a belt. But he’s also in socks, a white undershirt. No watch or rings or anything yet.
It feels oddly more intimate than it should. Your face warms despite yourself.
“E-evening, sir.”
He turns and you’re utterly unprepared for just how handsome he really is. Freshly groomed, hair trimmed and gelled, eyes bright.
“Well, aren’t you just a dream,” he rasps. “You’re stunning.”
You clear your throat, know that all the makeup in the world can’t hide how brightly you’re flushing. It’s pure politeness, he’s not looking at you with anything more than friendly appreciation. Mind out of the gutter, now.
“All the flattery in the world won’t save you if we’re late,” you manage, shaking yourself back into work mode. “So let’s see what we’ve got.”
You pick his shirt, a pocket hanky, his shoes. Tell him to get into those while calling Simon up the stairs. He’s there so fast you blink in surprise, then gesture him over. Sit him on an ottoman and extract the little bottle of makeup you’ve started keeping on hand for situations like this.
“Bullshite you had that in your purse,” he scoffs.
“You remember two weeks ago, when Soap came in with that bruise on his jaw?”
They told you it was a “disagreement” at the docks. You didn’t ask further, figuring it was some sort of bar brawl in that part of town. Rowdy boys.
“Ever since, I keep a couple minis on hand for you all.”
They’re so small that you just keep them in a pocket of your purse with the rest of your makeup and the tampons. Good for emergencies like this.
“You sure you’re not a mind reader?” Simon grumbles as you gently dab it over his face.
“How would being a mind reader even help in this situation,” you scoff, patting at it with your middle finger.
Price steps out of the closet with arms out. He’s picked a waistcoat as well that you hum in approval at.
“Which cufflinks are you wearing?” you ask, turning back to Simon. He’s sitting remarkably still and stoic — reminds you of a big dog trying to maintain some dignity while getting fawned over.
“The silver and diamond.”
You make a noise of disagreement. “The gold and onyx would go better.”
A pause. You sneak a glance and are relieved to see him smirking. “I’ll wear those then. Any opinion on a watch?”
You hum again, carding through your mental catalogue. “Oh! The Bulova you wore during that meeting with Kate Laswell. You remember?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
He disappears into his closet again while you lightly blend in the last touches of Simon’s coverup.
“There we are, good as new!” You declare. “Oh, and here.”
You set a couple of ibuprofen in his palm as he stands. “For the inflammation. Take with water.”
“Yes, mum,” he mumbles.
You wince. “Sorry! I’m being overbearing, aren’t I?”
He blinks, then puts a hand up. “No, no. That wasnt — I didn’t mean it in a bad way.”
You don’t entirely believe him. Know that you can be a bit much when you’re on a time crunch. Especially for something like this — an important business meeting over fancy dinner. You feel like everyone’s appearance is riding on you; this is your job after all. One thing out of place and everything will fall apart and it’ll be your fault.
“Simon, go take those,” Price orders from behind.
You turn as he approaches, a similar apology all set on your tongue. Instead, he gives you a sheepish smile and offers the cufflinks.
“Bloody useless with these,” he explains. “So unless you want to spend fifteen minutes losing respect for me…”
You laugh, amused by the idea of your hyper-capable boss struggling with a bit of jewelry that cost as much as a week of work. You step in close to thread them through his sleeves, fingers nimble and sure.
“You’re not wearing cologne?” You ask, surprised.
Don’t even realize how that might sound until he arches an eyebrow at you.
“Thought you might have an opinion on that too,” he replies. “And you haven’t steered me wrong, yet.”
He shows you his modest, but impressive collection of colognes. You pluck up one, sniff, and make a face, eyes watering a bit. It’s mostly full; clearly one he doesn’t wear often and you’re grateful for it.
“That bad, eh?”
“Sir, why?” You lament, putting it back.
“Gift from an ex,” he explains.
You store that tidbit of information away for further examination. The idea of your boss in a romance. Right now you’ve got a task to focus on.
“Did they hate you that entire time?” You wonder.
He snorts. “Maybe.”
You shake your head and pick a different one. Blink in surprise and sniff again. Feel your stomach flip.
“That one?” He asks when he notices you hesitate.
“No,” you say a little too quickly, setting it down. This is a business meeting, you can’t afford to be distracted by how he’ll smell with that on his skin.
You settle on one that doesn’t make your head dizzy and your panties shamefully damp. Still feel a bit like you’re shooting yourself in the foot, though. He’s going to smell sinfully good regardless.
You leave Price to his finishing touches and have Simon help you down the stairs. Check through the notes you hurriedly collected when you realized you’d be attending this dinner.
Price comes down too soon for your poor, stupid heart. Looks like something out of a magazine or a novel or a movie or… just too good to be real, really.
“Pass inspection?” He asks.
“Barely,” you tease.
His eyes do that thing where they smile more than his mouth; how you know it’s genuine. You try not to fluster, zero in on his tie, a little crooked and loose.
“Goodness, sir,” you murmur, stepping in close. Yeah, you were right. That cologne is going to be a personal challenge all night. “How did you get along before me?”
“With bad cologne and shitty ties, apparently,” he chuckles.
You grin despite yourself, getting it secure and centered, before smoothing his vest over it. Give him a once over. Feel your stomach flip again.
“If I may say, sir, you look handsome,” you offer quietly.
“Should hope so,” he replies, voice dipping in a way that’s detrimental to the state of your panties. “You dressed me.”
You hum, reach for your usual dry, sharp humor. “I have great taste.”
Instead of scoffing, he hums in agreement. Something flickers through his eyes that you don’t dare allow yourself to daydream on.
Simon, bless him, clears his throat and draws your attention. You check the clock above the stove.
“Ah, we need to get going. I can’t walk fast in these heels.”
You slip your arm automatically into Price’s and try not to obsess over how well you two fit together.
Tumblr media
First | Previous | Next
Masterlist
2K notes ¡ View notes
zorrasucia ¡ 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
this mess was yours (now your mess is mine) - Part 1
[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]
Reader x Carmy Berzatto (The Bear FX)
Rating: Explicit (6.4k)
Tags: Smut, Set two(ish) years before the present aka the New York years, Porn with a little plot, Virgin!Carmy (my beloved), Mutual Masturbation, P in V Sex, Thigh Riding, Handjob, Fingering, Oral Sex (F receiving), Friends with Benefits, Both Carmy and Reader have a bit of a praise kink
Summary: Carmy is your front door neighbor. You fall head first into a friends with benefits situationship. What could possibly go wrong?
"You know, I had never met someone so committed to ghosting. Leaving the city... That's a whole other level," you said, the words leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. Not as bitter as the sight of Carmy, though. He looked beautiful still, eyes wide with surprise and face red with embarrassment. You were in the alley behind the restaurant, where he had dragged you away from the staff mumbling something about "an old friend from New York."
"I've been uh-" his hands were fiddling with a spoon somewhat manically.
"I know," you interrupted. "I read your spread in Food and Wine. I was at the dentist and they had the magazine. Imagine my surprise when I saw that my neighbor, sorry, ex neighbor and ex friend with benefits, was the main story of a culinary magazine."
You were being melodramatic, you knew. But you had earned it. It had been months, fucking months, and not a word - he could be dead for all you knew.
"I told you I was a chef," he said sheepishly.
"Fuck you, Carmy."
"Yeah. Yeah, that's fair," he admitted with a deep sigh. "Do you, uh, wanna talk?"
"Yes."
2 years earlier
The elevator of your shitty, overpriced building was out of order for the third time this year. Fuck. As you climbed up the stairs you started hearing someone on the phone, his voice gruff.
"Sugar called. She is worried about the restaurant, she's worried about you..."
As you got closer you started to make out the voice on the other side of the phone, rougher, defensive, and very loud.
"My baby brother is worried about me? Well, fuck me. I must be a real goddamn mess, huh?"
"Don't be like that, Mikey. If you need me to come back, just fucking say it."
It was your front door neighbor, you realized. He was leaning on the wall by his door, rummaging through his backpack, his face scrunched up and red.
"Don't bother coming over, hot shot, everything's under control," the voice on the phone said, a little condescending.
"That your stupid little brother? Tell him to go fuck himself, will you, Mike?" a second voice chimed in, followed by the defeaning sound of a hundred knives and forks falling to the ground. "Fuck me!"
And the line went silent. You stood awkwardly, hand on your doorknob, waiting. You glanced at your neighbor and found his gaze vacant as he stood in front of his apartment door, keys in hand, standing still. He honestly looked on the edge of a meltdown and your heart ached for him.  
"It's Carmy, right?"
Your voice woke him up from his daydream - probably more like day-nightmare.
"Yeah. Hi," he managed, absent. He was still fiddling with his keys.
"No offense but you look like shit," you said and it made him huff half a laugh - he looked pretty when he smiled. "Wanna come in for a drink?"
"Uh, yeah. Sure," Carmy replied and followed you inside the apartment.
"So what do you want?" you asked, head inside the fridge. "I have beer-"
"Actually, uh, I don't drink," Carmy said like he had just remembered.
"Oh, so coffee? It's a little late but I think I have decaf somewhere..." you offered gently, moving towards the pantry.
'It's- never mind," he said, looking conflicted, walking backwards, to the door. "I just didn't want to be alone tonight," he winced and your heart skipped a beat. "That sounded awful. Sorry, I- uh- I'll leave."
"It's okay," you said, a shy smile curving your lips. "I've been trying to hit on you for months so it's more than okay."
"Oh!" Carmy froze, eyebrows arched, stunned.
"Yeah," you looked down at the floor, face flushed. "Gave up for a minute there. Thought you had a girlfriend or boyfriend so I-"
"No, there's nobody," he rushed to say. "I'm just busy."
"Workaholic?" you guessed.
"Yeah," he admitted.
You moved towards him, slow, Carmy's blue eyes following the movement of your hips. You stood right in front of him, one hand raising to touch his arm, up his shoulder and then holding his face.
He blurted: "You're pretty."
"You're cute too," you replied, smiling.
You leaned forward and kissed him. Carmy returned the kiss, gentle, soft, your hands tangling in his hair. You parted for a second, eyes searching his, finding him flushed. It was only a second of hesitation before he grabbed your waist and pulled you close, kissing hungrily, his tongue touching yours, holding you tight like you were a lifeline - like he needed this as much as you did.
"Bedroom?" you asked breathily the moment he started kissing your neck.
He nodded and pushed you gently past the kitchen. It was a good thing he had a vague idea where it was.
You hit the edge of the mattress and leaned backwards, dragging him into bed with you, opening your legs to let him settle there. He kept kissing your jaw and collarbone, tickling your skin with his curls, humming while you raked your nails through his scalp. Suddenly, his hands moved from holding your waist to squeezing your ass; you tugged at his hair in surprise and Carmy let out a sound between a yelp and a moan. It made you melt and giggle, bringing him closer still.
Your hands moved down, tickling as they reached the hem of his shirt; Carmy sat up and removed it, desperate.
"Fuck," you muttered, your fingers tracing the lines and planes of his torso for a moment. He was gorgeous.
It had gotten way too hot inside the room and his touch was making you dizzy, so you got rid of your shirt too, a plain beige bra underneath. His fingers traced the edges of the cups, leaving goosebumps on your skin, making you sigh with pleasure. It wasn't enough, though.
"Wait," you gasped and he froze immediately.
"You alright?" he asked, looking up, like he was scared he had done something wrong.
You cupped his face gently. "I'm just taking it off," you giggled, letting go of his face to open the clasp and tug it down. "This isn't even a nice one," you lamented, thinking of a dark lace ensemble, used only once and with someone less enthusiastic about you than Carmy. Still, his eyes became impossibly wide once your bra was off.
"Shit," Carmy whispered, burying his face in the valley between your breasts, eager, leaving kisses everywhere, carefully sucking on your nipples. You arched your back and held him tighter, urging him to get closer - you wished he was a little rougher but the tender way that he was going about things was nice. You felt cared for.
Your hands went down his stomach, fingers hooking in his belt loops, tugging with need. He stopped for a moment, looking straight into your eyes.
"Do you want me to-?" he hesitated.
"We can just keep making out but I'd like you to fuck me," you said plainly. "If you want."
He nodded, dazed. "Yeah. I think I'd like that."
You tugged at his trousers, fighting with the belt buckle for a moment in your haste.
"Hold on. Let me," he said, getting rid of his slacks while you took both your jeans and underwear off at once. He gave you a wide eyed stare as he finally threw his boxer briefs carelessly to the floor.
The atmosphere was charged as you laid down facing each other.
Almost as if to break the tension, one of your hands reached out for his cock, caressing it, making him groan.
"So soft," you mumbled.
He rushed to touch you too, cupping your pussy. His fingers were shaking a little, which gave you pause. You touched his wrist, rubbing your thumb on his tattooed skin. He looked at you.
"Sorry, I'm uh-"
"Nervous?" you prompted and he nodded. "Yeah, same. I've had a dry spell of... Almost eight months. You?"
"Years," he said, clearing his throat.
"Fuck. That's tough," you said with a sympathetic smile, your hand letting go of his cock to caress his shoulder blade instead, reassuring. "How are you at following directions?"
"Honestly, pretty fucking great," he said with a nervous chuckle.
"We can work with that."
You grabbed his right hand, and took his middle finger in your mouth, sucking on it thoroughly, a shiver running down Carmy's spine. You guided his hand back between your folds, dragging it up the length of your cunt until the tip of his finger was right on your clit. You closed your eyes in pleasure, his long, calloused fingers feeling delicious on you.
"There," you said breathily.
"How?" Carmy asked.
"Circles."
Your eyes fluttered once he started moving, slow and feathery. Your hand caressed the head of his cock and the sudden touch made Carmy's hand stutter and then stop completely.
"You first," he mumbled, taking your hand and placing it on his chest instead.
"A gentleman," you joked breathily, tracing one of his tattoos with the tip of your nail. You were getting flustered again now that his finger was moving faster. "A little to your right... Fuck, that feels good, Carmy."
He offered you a wicked smile in return.
"Faster?" he asked.
You nodded, biting your lower lip.
"Keep doing it just like that. Don't change a fucking thing," you pleaded, moving closer, your leg over his hip to give him more access, holding tight to his shoulders. "Fuck, your hands! So good, so good, so good," you mumbled nonsensically into his ear and Carmy smiled wide. You started kissing him frantically, getting closer and closer. "Oh!"
You stiffened in his hold, legs shaking a little, and a long moan leaving your lips. His finger was still moving, helping you ride the aftershocks of your orgasm.
"You okay?" he asked after a minute.
"Yeah," you sighed, and leaned to kiss him, all tongue, lust drunk. "Thank you."
Your hand reached for his cock, finding it achingly hard, Carmy's eyes rolled back at the touch. He moaned. There was a lot of precum on his tip. Was all that from just hearing and seeing you?
"I'll probably fucking embarrass myself but I really wanna be inside you," Carmy managed breathily.
You smiled and grabbed a condom from your bedside table.
"Do you want me to put it on?" you asked when you saw him hesitate to take it out.
"Go ahead," he watched your hands roll the condom on, eyes wide as you held him. "Fuck."
He grabbed your leg and hoisted it back over his hip. "This okay?"
"Yeah," you sighed, guiding his cock inside you with one hand and holding his arm with the other. "I know it's been a while so don't worry if you don't last," you said.
Did you want Carmy to fuck you hard and long? Yes. But you were reasonable.
He nodded sheepishly, moving gently until he was completely buried inside you.
"Fuck, you're so warm," Carmy said, eyes closed in concentration. "So tight."
You chuckled against the side of his face, flushed and hot.
"You feel amazing too," you said, the stretch of your pussy delicious and satisfying. You kissed his temple and his cheek, already a little sweaty and salty. "You can move now."
He didn't need to be told twice. The slam of his hips was frantic from the beginning, feral sounds coming from his chest, it was exactly what you needed. You realized Carmy was probably working his shit out while fucking you but it didn't feel like he was using you at all. He was completely present: his eyes on your face, his mouth on your skin, and his hands caressing you.
"Are you good?" he asked.
"So fucking good," you replied, your recent orgasm leaving you sensitive and electrified. "You're already lasting longer than I thought you would," you said with a giggle.
"Fuck off," he said lightly.
Suddenly, you went back to the third or fourth time you had seen Carmy, crossing paths in the staircase, the primal part of your brain fantasizing about what it would be like to have sex with him, you on top, his strong hands holding your hips possessively. If this was a one time thing, you should make the most of it, right?
"Can I-? Fuck. Will you let me ride you, Carmy?" you said.
His pupils dilated with desire. "Yes. Fuck," he blurted out, rolling over almost immediately.
You settled on his hips, the angle doing wonders for you - his tip brushed your G spot and your clit touched the hair at the base of his cock.
"Fuck."
You took his hands and placed them over your hips, while you pressed your palms to his sculpted chest.
"You're so fucking hot. It's ridiculous," you said, wild with need. It made him blush down to his collarbones.
You kept your eyes on his as you lifted your hips, then sat back down on him.
"Holy shit," he gasped.
"Yeah?" you checked in.
"Yeah. Keep going," he pleaded.
And you did. You started building an undulating rhythm, Carmy's mouth was open and his brows were furrowed. His blue eyes took you in completely: the bounce of your breasts, the curve of your stomach, the way your torso arched with every stroke. His hands moved upwards, cupping your breasts, thumbing your nipples, unconsciously making you go faster and squeeze your cunt around his cock.
"Please," Carmy keened.
You felt him struggle, he was close.
"Hold on just a little bit," you whispered. "I'll make it good for you, Carmy."
He nodded, red in the face.
You began riding him hard and fast, the bed squeaking underneath you.
"Oh, fuck!" he moaned. "Fuck, shit, Jesus Christ..."
You went faster and faster until the string of curses leaving his lips became completely unintelligible and his body tensed underneath you.
"Come on," you leaned forward, your hair caressing his chest and your lips grazing his cheek. "Let go."
He came with a series of guttural groans, holding you tight as your hips kept moving, rutting into his, chasing the last remnants of pleasure you both could get.
He let out a long exhale and you dismounted, your thighs shaking at the effort.
"You okay?" he asked. He looked slightly embarrassed as he took off the condom and tied it up.
"Just a little sore," you reassured him, settling next to him on the mattress.
His hand caressed your thigh, trying to soothe the ache in some small way - the gesture made you melt inside a little. You ran your fingers through his hair, his face was sweaty and beautiful.
"What do you do for a living?" you asked.
"I'm a chef," Carmy replied simply.
"Huh. I would have guessed tattoo artist," you said honestly, a finger tracing the ink on his forearm.
"I get that," he gave you a soft smile. "You?"
"I work at a bookstore."
"Makes sense," he hummed, eyeing the packed bookshelves in your room and the small piles of books on your bedside table. You stayed in silence for a while, just caressing each other, his fingers tracing pictures on your thighs. "That was amazing," he said.
"Yeah," you agreed, giddy. Your orgasm must have given you courage because you heard yourself saying: "Wanna do it again sometime?"
Carmy turned to look at you, slightly alarmed, like everything that had happened was a dream and he was suddenly awake. For a second, you were scared that he would bolt out of your bed and your apartment.
"I'm not good with relationships," he said in the end.
"Oh! No, I meant the sex bit," you smiled. "I'm not looking for a relationship either."
You weren't. Your life was enough of a fucking mess without some guy that could upend it by cheating on you or knocking you up.
"Hey, no need to say yes. I'm a big girl, I can take no for an answer," you reassured him.
He rolled over and kissed you hard.
"Yes, I want to do this again."
~
Carmy had left without waking you the morning after you fucked, scribbling a note on a napkin: "Early morning at the restaurant. See you soon? C."
You didn't see him for a few days though, not even a glimpse as you crossed each other in the hallway, but you hadn't stopped thinking about him - his hands, his eyes, the feeling of his cock buried deep inside you... You thought about him while you touched yourself late that following night, gasping his name as you came.
It was a relief then to see him about to knock on your door two nights later, takeaway container in hand, as you climbed up the stairs.
"Carmy," you said fondly.
"Oh!" He turned with wide eyes. "I just wanted to- Would you like to come over for some food?"
You beamed. "Did you make it?"
"Sort of," he shrugged. "It's- uh- leftovers from the restaurant. They're good though."
"Well, how can I say no to leftovers?" you teased and followed him inside his apartment.
It was the same floor plan as yours, only mirrored, and with less stuff - a lot less.
"You sure you live here?" you asked, eyeing the empty, stark rooms.
"Yeah," he chuckled. "I don't spend much time in it, though."
Carmy warmed up the food and placed it carefully on two plates, it looked like he was making an effort to be casual about it.
"What kind of restaurant do you work in?" you asked as he handed you a plate. "It smells delicious, by the way."
"Uh, fine dining," he said absently, guiding you to the couch. "You like risotto? Didn't think to ask, sorry."
"It's okay," you shrugged, taking a forkful and almost immediately moaning in delight. "Shut the fuck up! You made this?"
Carmy blushed and looked down. "We never do portions this big but I figured you'd be hungry," he said.
"You thought correctly," you said, swaying a little from how good the food was. It made him give you an endeared look. "Thank you."
"It's nothing," he insisted.
You kept eating in comfortable silence.
"Truly one of the best meals I've had," you said earnestly once you were finished.
Carmy took your clean plate and his half finished one to the kitchen, coming back to sit beside you.
"How was your day?" he asked.
"Fine," you said, half turning in your seat to take a good look at him. "Sales wise it was shit, according to my manager, but one little girl told me I was cool, so..."
He smiled wide. "Did she get anything?"
"Well, she wanted a book on planets and space. Her parents wanted to buy her an encyclopedia of some sort. It was for kids but still..." you scrunched your nose. "It took some convincing but her parents finally caved in."
"I think she was right," he said softly.
"Mmm?"
"I think you're pretty cool," he said, leaning over to kiss you.
It was gentle, measured, lovely.
"And you?" you asked when you parted. "How was your day?"
Something dark clouded over Carmy's face. "Let's not talk about my day," he rasped and then kissed you hard.
It was wild, hungry, needy.
You scooted closer to Carmy, running your fingers through his hair, humming in pleasure as his tongue touched yours. The angle was weird, and so you climbed over the couch, aiming to straddle his hips but settling on his thigh by accident. He bit on your lower lip and you moaned into his mouth.
"Fuck, Carmy," you blurted out.
His lips started kissing the length of your neck, down your collarbone, over your shirt. You took the hint and took your shirt off, proud that your bra was a little nicer than last time.
"Shit," he mumbled, kissing your breasts, up the cup, and through the lace.
You started grinding on his clothed thigh to relieve the ache between your legs, moaning every few thrusts.
"Is that good?" he asked breathily.
"Yeah," you sighed.
You could feel every seam of your jeans against his muscled thigh. If you weren't so horny, maybe you would feel a little embarrassed about dry humping your neighbor like a fucking teenager but Carmy didn't seem to mind - if anything, he seemed to like it. He held tight to your hips and angled his leg upward so that it would rub against your crotch easier, his eyes marveling at the way your body moved.
"You look so fucking hot," he mumbled into your skin. "Been thinking about you for days... About fucking you again... Making you feel good..."
You had always been a sucker for praise and there was something about Carmy saying nice things on that dirty tone that made you melt.
"Yeah?" you held his face, tilting it so he could look at you. "I've been touching myself thinking of you. Been making myself come thinking of your fingers on my clit and your cock inside me."
"Fuck," he uttered, mouth agape. After a moment of just staring at you, he surged forward and kissed you, mouth open, passionate. The crotch of your jeans was soaked with your arousal, wetting Carmy's slacks too. His hands on your hips urged you to go faster, to get your release.
"Close?" he asked.
You moaned needily into his mouth as a response.
Carmy slid the straps of your bra downwards,
not bothering to open it, and he took one of your nipples in his mouth and the other between his fingers.
"Shit! Fuck!" you cursed, the tightness in your belly snapping while you kept grinding on Carmy's thigh. He left soft kisses on the skin of your chest and caressed your waist while you came down from your high.
"So hot," he mumbled. "So fucking hot."
You giggled, and caressed his face not knowing what to say. You moved to straddle him properly, eager to feel his hardness against your core. He groaned.
"Do you wanna fuck me?" you asked flirtatiously, your palm touching right over his erection.
Carmy rolled his eyes.
"Yeah, I do," he panted. "Fuck."
You leaned downward, kissing the side of his neck and face. "Where do you keep your condoms?"
He froze.
"Shit."
You sat back, an incredulous look on your face.
"Carmy, really?"
He was flushed with embarrassment. "Even if I had one, it would be expired."
"I'll go get one from my apartment," you said. When you tried to get up, his strong hands kept your hips in place.
"Stay," he pleaded.
"Carmy, you're cute as fuck but no," you declared, rearranging the straps of your bra. "It's just across the hall."
"Wait, wait. I didn't mean we should do it without-" he searched for your gaze. "I meant I don't want you to leave, that's all. We don't have to do anything tonight."
"Oh."
"Yeah," he exhaled, arching his neck to kiss you sweetly.
You giggled. "Next time I come over there better condoms."
"Definitely," he agreed.
You kept making out for a while, his calloused hands tracing pictures on your back, and his tongue touching yours gently. You moved forward a little and pressed on his erection accidentally. He let out a loud groan.
"Sorry," you apologized. "There's something we can do," you said softly, undoing his belt and the buttons of his slacks. "Can I touch you?"
"Yes."
You took his cock in your hand, spreading his precum down the length of it. Your other hand went inside your jeans, gathering arousal to use as lube. Carmy shivered underneath you.
"What do you like?" you asked, pumping his cock slowly, watching Carmy's chest move quicker as you did.
"The tip, with your thumb," he managed. You did as he asked, swiping over his slit, once. He nodded, biting his lip. "Yeah, when I'm close I do that. And just fast. I like it fast."
"Would you let me start slow, though?"
He smiled, running a hand through his messed up hair. "Yeah."
You tortured him a little, to be honest.
You caressed every ridge and vein on his cock, lovingly, slowly, and you kissed his lips through it, swallowing his moans.
"Fuck, it never feels this way," he praised. "So good."
"I'm going to go faster now, the way you like it, okay?"
He nodded desperately. "Please."
You pumped him as fast as you could, watching him become a mess under you, rolling his eyes and shaking.
"Fuck, I'm close," he keened.
You kept on that frantic rhythm with one hand and caressed his head with the other, like he told you. In seconds he was coming all over your hand and forearm, some droplets falling on your belly and chest. You were a goddamn mess but so was Carmy - his eyes unfocused and an absent smile on his face.
"Good?" you asked proudly.
"Tremendous," he chuckled and moved to kiss you holding you tight to his body.
"Careful, I've got- uh-" you giggled, gesturing at the stripes of cum all over your right side.
"Fuck, didn't think about that, wait."
He took his shirt off and wiped you clean with it, kissing you deeply once he was done. He dragged you to lie on the couch with him.
"Sorry about the mess," he apologized.
"Sex is messy," you shrugged.
"Guess I don't have much experience on the subject," Carmy said absently.
"I find it hard to believe with the way you look," you flirted, caressing the muscles of his arm.
"What if- uh- what if I told you you are my first?" he said.
"As in the first person you had sex with?" you confirmed.
He nodded.
"I'd find it even harder to believe," you said, tracing the contours of his face with your finger, the arch of his nose. "But I'd thank you for telling me."
Carmy smiled with relief and kissed you again.
"Can I ask you something?" he said softly.
"Sure."
"When you came thinking of me, what were you doing?"
You blushed and covered your face, the reality of what you had said hitting just now.
"Uh," you hesitated, "well, I was fucking my fingers."
"Would you show me?"
You turned to look at him, his eyes were dark and dead serious.
"Fuck, Carmy," you exhaled. "I thought you were wiped out and this was your idea of pillow talk."
"Oh, I'm wiped the fuck out," he agreed. "It just seems like you aren't," he added with a smile.
You smirked. "Alright."
With your eyes on his, you unbuttoned your jeans and dragged them down your legs along with your underwear, both still wet with your arousal. You opened your legs, one dangling over the edge of the couch and the other pressed against Carmy's body. His hand hooked under the bend of your knee, holding you, his thumb drawing circles on your skin. You shivered.
Carmy's eyes followed your hand as it rested on your mound, your middle and ring fingers going easily inside your cunt with how wet you were.
"Fuck," he said, entranced, watching your fingers go in, knuckle by knuckle.
You arched your back and moaned. Every feeling was heightened by having Carmy watch you. You started curling your fingers inside you, brushing your G spot, gasping. Then, you began thrusting your fingers in and out, your hips chasing the feeling too. Before you could get too carried away, Carmy touched your arm, his fingers closing on the wrist that was giving you pleasure.
"Can I?" he asked.
"Yes," you panted, your cunt clenching at the thought of his calloused hands.
You took your fingers out with a wince. His middle finger traced the contour of your clit, making you shiver and giggle nervously.
"Tell me if I'm fucking up," he said shyly.
"Yes." You kissed the side of his face, encouraging him as his index poked at your entrance. "Little lower. Yes."
He had no trouble fitting in one finger with how wet you were. The second one was a tighter fit.
"Slow, slow," you instructed him, humming with pleasure at the stretch, grabbing at his bicep once every knuckle was inside you. "Fuck..."
He curled his fingers inside you, caressing your walls gently. You let out a loud moan when he touched your G spot.
"Oh! Is that-?" he asked. "It feels different."
"Yeah," you whined because he stopped. "Keep going, Carmy, please."
"Right, right, sorry," he chuckled and continued, his long fingers reaching the depths of you, growing more confident and bolder in their movements.
One of your hands was leaving crescent moon imprints on his bicep - your nails digging in his flesh as your pleasure grew.
"My clit, touch my clit, please," you begged and he rushed to press his thumb on it, circling it, your body responding immediately, arching and clenching.
When you opened your eyes, something proud was coloring Carmy's features.
"Keep going, you're doing so good, making me feel so fucking good, Carmy," you mumbled, burying your face in his neck, panting. Your words made him go faster and a little rougher. "Fuck, you're gonna make me come."
Your voice was so whiny you didn't recognize it but you couldn't concentrate on that, not when Carmy was three knuckles deep inside you, hitting your G spot with every stroke, breathing hard against your skin.
"Are you gonna think about this the next time you touch yourself?" he rasped and you unraveled, seeing stars while you rutted against his hand, drowning your moans on his shoulder, grabbing the cushions of his couch like they were the only thing keeping you grounded.
"You okay?" Carmy asked after what felt like a long time, though probably it only was a couple of minutes. Your cunt was still throbbing deliciously around his fingers.
"I'm perfect," you sighed, grabbing his face for a messy kiss.
"Wiped out?" he asked.
"Not sure I'll be able to walk back to my apartment actually," you giggled, eyes half lidded. "You are truly incredible at following instructions," you teased.
"Told you," he played along, kissing your shoulder gently as he took out his fingers. "You can sleep over if you want," he offered.
"Nah, I need to take a shower," you sighed, a little sad that you had to get rid of the smell of Carmy and sex. You grabbed your shirt and underwear from the floor. "I'll sleep here next time," you promised.
"Next time?" Carmy asked, watching you get up and get dressed.
"Yeah, next time," you insisted flirtatiously. "When you buy condoms."
He laughed.
You leaned downward to kiss him sweetly.
"Thank you. It was good, so good," you said earnestly.
"Fuck. You were amazing too," he replied.
You walked to the door. "Good night, Carmy."
"Good night."
~
You were brushing your hair in front of the bathroom mirror, fresh out of the shower, warm and relieved after a long day. An insistent knock on your door made you roll your eyes in irritation.
"Who is it?"
"Carmy!"
Your heart raced a little and you smiled. You opened the door and sure enough, there he was, disheveled and beautiful, wrapped up in his wool coat.
"Hello," you said with a shy smile.
"Didn't mean to interrupt," Carmy said, gesturing vaguely at your wet hair and bathrobe. You rearranged it and he blushed a little - which was terribly endearing considering he had seen your pussy up close not even a week ago.
"You're not interrupting anything," you replied. Before you could stop yourself, your hand reached out and touched his cheek, red from the cold. "You're freezing. Want to come in? I can make us some tea."
"Yeah, that would be nice," he walked in behind you, toed off his shoes, left his coat on the couch, and followed you inside the kitchen.
"Chamomile?"
"Sure."
You went through the preparations in silence, there was a sigh of relief once he grabbed the mug you were offering and held it between his hands.
"You okay?" you asked, leaning on the counter and taking a sip of your tea. "Bad day?"
"Always," Carmy replied and some part of you knew he wasn't joking.
"I'm sorry," you said softly. "Is it really that bad inside a kitchen?"
"Whatever you're imagining, it's ten times worse," he rasped. "Twenty if you have an asshole for a boss."
"And do you?"
"Oh, yeah. The worst," he took a big gulp of tea - you were almost certain he had burnt his tongue with it.
"Then why do you do it?" you tilted your head, searching for his eyes.
"It's- It's- " he hesitated. "It's everything. It's a way of communicating, it's taking care of other people, it's beautiful and complex..."
"And you love it," you concluded.
"I do. Yeah," Carmy ended with a heavy sigh.
"Wait here," you said, handing him your mug, padding to your bedroom and coming back with a coffee table book. "Here," you exchanged your mug for the hardcover and sat on the counter.
Carmy took it and looked at it carefully. It was a book on fine dining - pages and pages of beautifully plated dishes from different restaurants in Europe.
"This is so cool," he flipped through the pages. "I worked here," he said, beaming.
"Did you learn how to make that dish?" you asked.
"Yeah, must have the recipe somewhere... Thanks for showing me this," he said after a while, taking the book and handing it back to you.
You shook your head. "That's yours."
"I can't take it," Carmy refused.
"Yes, you can," you insisted. "A friend gave it to me as a house warming present and I never even opened it. You would be doing me a favor," when you saw Carmy was about to argue some more you doubled down. "Do I look like I need more books in here?"
He chuckled and shook his head, placing the book on the table, giving in.
He walked towards you. "Thanks. I mean it."
"You're very welcome," you said earnestly when he leaned in to kiss you.
Carmy nuzzled the side of your face, then down your neck.
"You smell amazing," he said softly. "Coconut."
"That's my conditioner," you smiled and held him closer.
"Lavender, rosemary," he mumbled into your collarbone.
"My body wash."
He already had you gasping for breath as he kept kissing you, standing between your legs, pulling you closer by the bend of the knee. He ran his tattooed hands up and down your thighs, his finger tips still a little cold.
"Can I taste you?"
"Yes. Please."
Carmy knelt before you, something dark and hungry coming to life in your belly as he pulled you closer to the edge of the counter. He opened up your robe and found you bare. Then, he started peppering kisses up and down the insides of your thighs, kneading your ass in his hands, getting you flustered without even touching your cunt.
"Let me know when it's good, alright? Like last time," Carmy said against the skin of your thigh, you could feel his face warming up.
"Yeah. Though you're already doing better than my last two boyfriends, Carm," you said lightly, caressing his hair.
He chuckled against your skin and the whisper of air between your legs made you shiver.
The tip of his tongue caressed your folds, gently, teasing. You hummed softly, closing your eyes. Then, he flattened his tongue, going up your cunt several times, faster and faster, lapping at your entrance, getting a taste of your arousal and humming in response.
"Shit," you managed.
"Mhmm?" he checked in, not letting go of you.
"Yes," you moaned louder. "It's good."
He kissed his way up your clit, rubbing his nose on it before he started licking at it diligently.
"Suck on it, please. Oh, fuck. Fuck," you arched your back. "Can you- Shit, Carmy- Can you put your fingers inside me?" you pleaded.
He let go for a moment, his mouth and your arousal making a lewd sound as he parted. His middle finger traced around your cunt, gathering wetness before going inside you in one swift thrust.
"Yes. Perfect."
"Another?" you looked into Carmy's eyes, he was flushed and giddy.
You nodded and his index finger joined the middle, a smirk curving his wet lips when he made you moan with a simple curl of his fingers.
"You're a menace," you teased and he laughed.
"Keep looking at me," he said, going back between your legs, eyes on you as he continued sucking your clit.
"Fuck, that feels good," you were breathing hard, fingers tugging on Carmy's curls, your bathrobe completely undone. He moaned hard when your pussy clenched on his fingers, the vibration making you shiver with pleasure.
"You're making me feel so good, Carmy," you praised breathlessly, one of your hands squeezing your breast unconsciously. "I'm close." He arched an eyebrow, questioning. "A little faster. Fuck me with your fingers."
He started pumping his fingers in and out of you, fast, while his lips sucked on your clit frantically, wet noises turning you on even more.
"Just like that, just like that," you moaned. "Keep going, please, please, please..."
You kept looking at him, seeing his eyes shut in pleasure when you fluttered around his knuckles. Your orgasm hit you hard and had you screaming and thrusting against his face before you could stop - his strong arms kept you in place.
"Oh, my God," you keened as he kept going, prolonging your orgasm until it was almost too much to bear, senseless praise flowing freely from your lips. "You're so fucking good, Carm. Make me feel so good."
Everything was warm, white and fuzzy.
Carmy stopped his movements abruptly. You felt him groan needily against your cunt, turning his face to bite on the flesh of your thigh. Looking down, you realized he was palming his cock over his slacks. He had come to the sound and the taste of you.
You tugged on his hair to get him up on his feet and kiss him. His lips were red and swollen, and his tongue tasted like you. When you parted, you saw a satisfied and sedated look on his face.
"Never had a guy do that."
"Eat you out?" he asked, disoriented. His hair was a fucking mess.
You ran your hands through his curls lovingly. "No. Make me cum that hard. Enjoy eating me out that much."
"It was hard not to," Carmy replied. "The fucking sounds you make..."
You hid your face in his shoulder, cheeks burning red.
"I'll try to be quiet next time."
"Please don't," he rasped, tilting your head to kiss you hard.
~
[Part 2]
372 notes ¡ View notes
writeaboutit ¡ 5 months ago
Text
I Lied
Tumblr media
You and Ellie met on a dating app, you lied about something minor, and she finds out (but is cute and fluffy, and a laugh is had).
Hi haven't written anything in a long while so forgive if this is absolute shite🙏🏻🙏🏻. This just popped into my head totally not based on anything real, no definitely not.
"Hey baby," Ellie greets as she walks through your shared bedroom door. She's slightly hunched over and shuffling her feet showing that she had a long, exhausting day.
You pop off the bed and wrap her in a hug. She melts into your embrace.
"You tired baby?" you question. You can feel the movement of her nodding her head against the crook of your neck. She must be really spent if she can't even say yes.
Usually, the moment she gets home from work she's either ranting about her incompetent coworkers or she's excitedly sharing a new fact she learned about that week's hyperfixation.
Her silence is a bit off-putting. You feel the need to hear her voice so you prompt her, "What can I do for you?"
The silence rings out for a moment, the only sound to be heard is your breath and hers intermingling. Then she's responding, "You know that time you told me you cooked pad thai before we started dating?"
You furrow your brows in confusion. You can recall when you told her that over text, in the dating app you met on, but you're a bit confused as to why she's bringing it up now, or why she even remembers that at all.
"Yes," you say hesitantly, wondering where this conversation is going.
"Can you make that? It sounds so good right now." She asks with puppy dog eyes.
For a moment you're caught off guard. You never thought she would ask you to make her pad thai after that conversation and you worry for all of two seconds before bursting into laughter.
Ellie pulls away from the hug and looks at you with confusion. She props her hand on her hip and watched as you double over with laughter before righting yourself and calming down.
"Oh baby, I'm sorry but I lied," You giggle again, "I tried to make pad thai but it turned out so bad. I only told you I made a good pad thai because I wanted you to think I was this sexy girl who could cook well," you let out one last chuckle when you finish your explanation.
Ellie's jaw is hanging open, "What if I was only dating you for your pad thai-making abilities?"
You chuckle at that as well. There is no way this woman is only dating you for your cooking skills, that's for sure.
"I'd say you're full of shit. We've been dating for two years and you have not once brought up my homemade pad thai." You prop a had on you hip and raise an eyebrow waiting for her retort.
She throws her head back with a laugh before enveloping you in her arms, "You're such an idiot, I love you."
You smack her arm playfully, "Hey I'm not an idiot, and I love you too."
"You're right, you're not an idiot my love." She says the last bit against your lips before connecting them.
When you break apart she looks down at you before asking, "Well now what are we going to eat?"
You shrug, "We can order Thai food for delivery."
"See this is why I love you, you're a problem solver." She places quick kisses across your cheeks and the bridge of your nose causing you to giggle.
"Okay okay get off me so I can make the order," you laugh as you push her away.
"I love you," she throws out as you walk out of the bedroom towards the kitchen.
"Yeah, yeah." you laugh, giddy over your girlfriend.
so yeah there ya go. idk what this was i just really need to get back into the habit of writing. this wasn’t proof read so sorry about any mistakes. i’m gonna keep writing so trust better stuff will be posted🙏🏻
381 notes ¡ View notes
strawberrymilk-sunshine ¡ 3 months ago
Text
Eternal flame of the heart
Rollo Flamme x reader because it's Glorious Masquerade season!!
Tbh I wasn't even planning on writing this but the idea just hit me out of nowhere so what was I supposed to do?
Warning(s): fainting/unconsciousness, Rollo is a bit of a creep, drugging, this is a short one but I still hope you like it!
Slight disclaimer: I'm very sorry if I mischaraterise Rollo, it has been a while since I actually read through the event, and I have not had time to reread it. As well as this, I'm sorry if I have forgotten or misremembered any important details of the Glorious Masquerade story. Okay, that's all, enjoy!
Tumblr media
You climbed the bell tower, you made it through all the firelotuses... everyone has sacrificed for you to get here... everyone is counting on you.
Malleus, Idia, Azul, and you have made it successfully to the top floor, but... but then... then... something goes wrong.
Everyone... everyone except for you and Rollo just collapse... and now, you are alone with him.
You are alone with him.
What do you do.
"Hello, (Y/N)." Rollo greets you simply. You start to panic and grab a small, stray plank of wood off the floor, intending to attack him with it. You don't have magic, so this is the best self-defense you have right now... "Ah, there's no need for that. Put it down."
"Y-you don't tell me what to do." You try your hardest to stay confident, fully intending to whack him with the wood plank.
"You don't truly intend on hurting me, do you?" He smirks at you... so uncomfortable to look at. "Of course you don't. How would you expect yourself, a magicless human with no knowledge of this world, to get rid of all the firelotuses?"
"QUIET!!" You yell, preparing to swing the plank. "You... you, get rid of the flowers! All of them! Now! Y-you're the cause of this, so... you must know how to get rid of them!"
He moves so quick, it's almost like he glides across the floor...
"You are magicless. You are..." He leans in close to you, and whispers in you ear, "beautiful."
You were about to h him with your wood plank, but it very suddenly lit on fire?! You dropped the wood as it burnt your hand and Rollo stomped out the flame, leaning even closer to you... damn it, you should really pick that up again when he gives you the chance.
"So different from everyone else... so... pure..." He takes a deep breath before whispering to you again. "Your hair smells so wonderful."
You push him away from you, disgusted.
"What is wrong with you?! Why the hell would you do something like this, you... DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT THIS WILL DO TO YOUR WORL-!?"
As you begin to yell, something is forced onto your mouth and nose... hang on... wait... what's happening...
"This is known mostly as poor man's sleeping poison, at least here, though I prefer to use the proper name for it." Rollo grabs you by the back of the head as well, in order to keep you from just avoiding what he does to you. That's not to say you don't struggle, you absolutely do, it's just that it doesn't do much for you... "That proper name of course being chloroform."
...shit...
"You'll be okay. The firelotuses won't hurt you. I won't hurt you."
...everything is starting to go dark...
"I'll put you somewhere nobody will find you. You won't have to deal with the troubles of this world, well, not that you would have had to anyways after I succeed."
...
"Good night."
254 notes ¡ View notes
theorphicangel ¡ 10 months ago
Text
𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐨 𝐜𝐢𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐦𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬. | 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐨’𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
Tags: enemies to lovers, college au, smut, 18+, slow burn,
Tumblr media
synopsis: It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single, brooding man in possession of a good future in genetics, must be in want of a girlfriend.
Or at least a fake one to get his family off his back.
(college au & fake dating trope ft my favourite grumpy man who doesn't fall first but ends up falling harder. ouch.)
Chapter two: low expectations.
taglist: @oharasfilipinawife @palesatan @yougavemeyourheartyouknow @amelialysm @crimin4llyins4ne
A/N: sorry for the late update, but imma catch you guys up 🫡
previous chapter | next chapter
Tumblr media
Over the next few days you manage to get your pre-reading all done and dusted.
You can’t help but already feel exhausted by the amount of things that you have to juggle at university.
Just as soon as you were completed with one task, you groaned at the thought of your long list of remaining errands. Bills, assignments, grocery shopping and your shifts at the cafe were all piled on top of you constantly, not to mention your attempt to attend your lectures and classes, double checking that they were the right ones.
But the most stressful by far was trying to avoid your mother’s calls, which occurs at least twice a day. As of recently, you had thought that you were safe, coming up with excuses left, right and center.
At least that was before you had seen a missed call from your dad this morning.
That’s how you know that you’re really in the shits.
You’re gonna have to come up with something. And in quick timing.
But for now, you’re going to have to sideline your personal dilemmas.
With your new job at the cafe, you have no choice but to remain consistent with your routine, that is of course, if you want your new job to last.
After weeks of rejection or rather, the lack of replies, you had managed to secure a job at your roommate’s favorite cafe spot.
And by secure you mean that you had sort of lied about having experience in a cafe previously.
You didn’t entirely lie…just exaggerated the truth a little bit.
This was one of the only jobs that had replied to you out of a whole stockpile and you weren’t going to let it go to waste. Not under any circumstances.
You did have the experience of watching and observing what your classmate did at her family owned cafe whilst you were on the till for a few minutes.
But nonetheless, what’s so hard about making coffee? Anyone can do this shit. It’s okay if you’re learning on the job, doesn’t everyone? Currently, you succeed in trying to rotate between keeping track of orders and making drinks as well as trying not to get in MJ’s way too much.
But you were handling it to the best of your abilities. Even if that did mean messing up a few of your customers' orders every once in a while. MJ had said nothing about it so far which means that you're in the green light.
For now.
“You really should be getting some sleep, don’t let your first year knock you out before midterms.” She acknowledges, elbowing you slightly.
“I kno–” you barely finish your sentence, another yawn coming out of nowhere.
“See?” She hums, finishing off an order for the previous customer. “You need some beauty sleep.”
She’s referring to your bruised under eye bags that have started to appear. Ultimately, the results of you staying up till midnight yesterday to finish off an assignment. You had only managed to get a few hours of sleep before waking up in time for your 6am shift.
“I also need money, but we can’t have it all can we MJ?” you note, keeping your tone light before you move on to serve another customer.
You’ve only been on shift for a couple of hours but you think you’re coping well so far. MJ forewarned you about the morning lecture rush hour. You guessed that it was soon by glancing at the old clock hung up on the wall, indicating that it was just after 8:30 am. Students continued to spill in and out of the cafe, the bell above the front door continuously ringing in your ears.
A small line had begun to queue up and you swiftly moved through them with ease. As your next customer came up to the counter, your face lit up at the sight of a familiar face.
“Oh hey stranger–” you begin, recognising the same grueling face that you had seen last week bore into you. But you barely get a chance to finish your sentences before he cuts you off sharply.
“Coffee. Black.”
Your mouth forms an ‘o’ as you tap his order into the machine, immediately sensing his disgruntled aura. By the expression on his face, you can tell that he doesn’t seem up for teasing.
He seems…frustrated? Or maybe even upset?
“Name?”
“Miguel.”
You can’t tell whether he’s cranky because it’s 8am in the morning or rather that you failed to notice this the last time you saw him. Either way, it makes you a little dazed. Perhaps he wasn’t a morning person. You understood that because you were the complete same. Taking his name, you brush him off instead hoping that your coffee will cheer him up.
You inform him of the price and he swipes his card without a second glance. He leaves to take a seat in one of the corners of the cafe which just so happens to be the only part of the cafe that wasn’t so overwhelmed with customers.
It’s not long before you head over there yourself with his order.
“Here’s your black coffee.” you say, setting it down in front of him. Hastily, you’re about to run off to prepare your next order before his words stop you.
“I ordered a black coffee. Not a latte.”
You turn around abruptly, realizing your full mistake. “Oh shit, I’m sorry—”
“Are you new here or just incapable of making a simple cup of black coffee?” Miguel interrupts, his tone laced with vexation.
“Who do you think you’re–”
Your outrage comes to a halt by the sound of your name being called by MJ. You glance over your shoulder and notice her point towards an ever growing queue of customers. Shit, you don’t have time to cuss him out.
Taking a deep breath, you make the decision to be the bigger person, after all it’s like what your manager Steve said…
‘ The customer is always right.’
“I’ll bring it over for you, m’sorry.” you apologize again, rubbing at your forehead, suddenly overwhelmed with the pressure. With sweat beading at your brows, you look over to see a small queue beginning in front of the till again.
MJ throws you a hurried glance, a look which you know means ‘hurry the fuck up and make these orders.’
You end up taking longer than five minutes to return back to him, run ragged with the new orders of coffees, teas, lattes, macchiatos and hot chocolates that continue to pile up.
“Here you go, sorry about that.” You place his new and correct drink in front of him.
“No worries.”
You’re almost taken aback by his response. First he snaps at you and now he’s telling you not to worry about it? God, he was so confusing.
“Enjoy.”
You think that you hear a mutter of ‘thanks’ leave his mouth but you don’t turn back to hear his words clearly. Yet… you can’t exactly keep away.
For some reason your brain keeps lingering towards a burning question which has rattled your mind all through the past week. Giving in to your temptations, you end up turning around and prompt Miguel with another question.
“How did you know ‘Pride and Prejudice’ was set in the 19th century?”
“Huh?” He glances up from his phone, his thumb paused in his mindless scrolling.
“Last time, when I saw you in the library. You knew it was set in the 19th century.”
“I didn’t.'' Miguel huffs, and your eyes can help but notice the size of his biceps. You estimate that they’re bigger than your fucking hands. “It was an estimated guess.”
“Really? You don’t seem too-”
“Listen.” Miguel quips, his sharp tone suddenly returning, causing your voice to trail off midway through your sentence. His fingers pinch the bridge of his nose as he speaks. “I’m going to try and say this in the nicest way possible, but I’m really not in the mood for some crap about your literature degree, okay? I really couldn’t care less.”
Ouch.
Your expression drops and you’re immediately aware of the distance between the two of you.
He’s right. You barely know him. He’s just a guy who just so happened to be there at one of the most embarrassing moments of your life. “Right, sorry.”
You’re about to leave his table before he stops you…again.
“Y’know I ought to tell your manager that you messed up my order.” Miguel begins, continuing to scroll on his phone, not bothering to even look up at you. “This is a very reputable cafe and if you start slacking on the job then…”
“Then what?” You question. “Are you trying to threaten me with a bad review?”
“I wouldn’t necessarily say threaten is the right word but…now that you say that perhaps I should write one.”
Your stomach drops at his words. “Oh, you fucking wouldn’t.”
He smirks, still peering down at his phone. “Maybe I would.”
“Bet.”
“Don’t start betting on things that you’ll end up regretting, nena.”
Your brow raises at his phrase which you don’t entirely understand but you really don’t have time to question it. Your patience is running out as well as your time to get back on track with the orders.
As you walk away from his table, his words seem to settle into your skin.
He wouldn’t? Would he? No… he hasn’t got the balls to. What kind of person has that amount of free time on their hands to write a bad review? At least he had gotten his coffee in the end, you were in your right mind not to spill it all over him on purpose.
“He’s a dick, he’s a dick, he’s a total dick.” You mutter under your breath, making your way back to your station. But you should’ve guessed that from your conversation with him in the library, recalling his mocking tone of your embarrassment.
You should’ve kept your expectations low if you ever thought that you were going to be friends with him.
“What did you say?” MJ queries, hearing your mumbles as you join her.
You nod towards Miguel, still sitting in the far corner scrolling mindlessly on his phone.
“He’s an evil, brooding…” You fail to think of an appropriate ending.
“Dick?” MJ ends.
“Correct.” you say. You promise to yourself that from this moment onwards you are refraining from looking over at that corner.
You find that time passes quickly during your shift and once the rush hour of students finally dies down, you and MJ get the chance to finally take a break.
“Fucking hell, I never want to do that again.” She murmurs wiping down the surfaces near the coffee machines for any spilt substances.
“Ditto that.” you murmur, grabbing a cloth to wipe down some empty tables.
Learning that MJ was a performing arts student made you more than happy to get along well with her. She was in her second year, yet in a sea of sickening STEM students here you had real proof that you weren’t the only humanities student.
Take that Miguel.
/
Currently eating dinner alone in your apartment, you reminisce on your day in silence, your roommate out at her weekly computer coding club. You think that it was safe to say that it was a good day today, despite all the stresses at work.
Speaking of work, you recall the conversation from this morning.
You don’t want to give this Miguel guy too much credit but you’d be lying if you said that his threat earlier didn’t scare the shit out of you for the remainder of your day.
Even MJ had to ask if you were alright when it got to the end of your shift and you had brushed it off, blaming it on your exhaustion.
He was totally bluffing….right? I mean, he doesn’t even know you.
You bite down on your metallic fork, anxiety rapidly filling you within.
No, you can’t help it. You have to check.
Chewing on your fingernails, you type in the name of the cafe that you work out and head over to the reviews section on Google.
Scrolling down to find the latest reviews, your stomach practically drops at one comment, under the simple username of: @miguelohara20.
‘New barista lacked the ability to do her job. Couldn’t pay attention to even get my order right. Talks way too much unprovoked, to the point where you might as well save some money and make the damn coffee yourself.’
The fucking nerve of this guy causes so much anger within you that your fork practically falls from your other hand as you immediately go to text MJ. You send her a screenshot before typing with fury.
- ‘Did you see this? This was that guy that I was complaining about earlier: the rude, evil, brooding STEM one.’
Sent: 7:34pm
It’s not long before you receive a reply from MJ and it’s one that makes your stomach drop.
- ‘Yeah I did :/ Steve texted me about it actually.
Received: 7:36pm
MJ sends through another text, a few seconds later.
- ‘He wants a meeting with you on ‘customer etiquette’ !!
Received 7:36pm
Dropping your phone on the table, you let out a groan, holding your head in your hands. Now, this day went from ‘good’ to being the second worst day of your life, now with your job on the line.
Yeah…you think you fucking hate Miguel now.
Tumblr media
reblogs are much appreciated!
lmk if you would like to join the taglist!
297 notes ¡ View notes
ladykailitha ¡ 1 year ago
Text
Grief (A Friend Indeed) Part 1
Hello! Sorry it's been nothing but one-shots lately, but as I said in this post here I haven't abandoned anything, my life has just got a little crazy lately.
This was conceived because my sister's former mother-in-law passed away due to massive heart failure a week ago and I chose to write this story as a way with dealing it. I didn't know her well, but I did know her and that's enough I think to feel some grief at her passing. She was a year younger than my dad.
Summary: Eddie and Wayne have to go back to Kentucky when Eddie's grandmother (and Wayne and Al's mother) passes. Steve comes along when Eddie suggests that he would feel better if he came. Along the way they learn about each other's pasts and find out that they are each other's future.
***
Eddie walked into the Family Video and had to stop and gaze fondly at the sight before him. Steve was draped over the counter reading a magazine and steadfastly ignoring the bell above the door that announced his arrival.
He got up to the desk and greeted affectionately, “Hey, Stevie.”
Steve bolted straight up and ran his fingers through his hair. “Oh hi, Eds. I didn’t realize that it was you.”
Eddie smiled for the first time in days.
Steve grinned back. “You know, a boy could start to think you were avoiding him. You know, since I haven’t seen you around in days.”
Eddie winced, shoving his hands into his jean pockets. “Sorry, man. I had family stuff.”
Steve’s teasing grin slid off his face. “Shit. I’m sorry. That was a dick move.”
Eddie waved his hands. “No, no. There was no way for you to know. In fact, that’s why I’m here. To make sure you don’t think that I’m avoiding you. Because I wouldn’t. You see Wayne and I have to go back to Ashland for a funeral.”
Steve’s already contrite expression softened further. “Oh, Eds. That’s awful. Are you okay? Do you need anything?”
Eddie’s eyes welled up and before the first tear could fall, Steve was over that counter and wrapping him up in his arms.
“I’ve got you, Eds,” Steve murmured. “I’m here now.”
Eddie sobbed and sobbed as Steve just gently rubbed his back until he calmed down enough to talk.
“It’s Uncle Wayne’s mom, my grandma,” he explained, clutching Steve’s shirt like a life line. “She was just the sweetest old lady and now she’s gone. I’m going to miss her.”
“Oh, Eds,” Steve murmured. “I’m sorry. That must just be awful for you. If there is anything I can do, just let me know.”
Eddie chuckled into Steve’s work vest. “Too bad you can’t come with. I think I’d feel braver about seeing all Dad’s family again if you were there.”
Steve grabbed his biceps and pushed him back gently. “Done.”
Eddie stuttered and sputtered. “Stevie, no...”
Steve picked up the phone on the counter and dialed a number. “Stevie yes.”
And Eddie watched in awe horror as Steve’s eyes suddenly welled up with tears and he rubbed his nose.
“Keith?” Steve said, his voice rough as if he had been doing the crying. “Yeah, I just got a call from my mom. My grandmother has died and I have to go to Kentucky for the funeral.”
Eddie’s jaw dropped. He didn’t even know that Steve knew where Ashland was.
“Yeah, my mom is from Lexington,” Steve said with a wink at him. “A real southern belle. I’ve seen pictures of her debutante ball and everything.”
Eddie snorted, because of course she was.
“I would need at least a week,” Steve was saying. “With the reading of the will and all.”
Eddie scoffed. If there was a will, he very much doubted there would be anything as formal as a reading of the damn thing.
“Oh thank you so much,” Steve sniffled. “I’ll even call Robin and let her know about her needing to pick up a few shifts.”
And like that Steve had gotten the week off.
“And the award for best crocodile tears to get out of working goes to Steve Harrington!” Eddie said, waving his hands back and forth. “Holy shit, man, how did you do that?”
Steve snorted. “As any good actor will tell you in order to cry on command, you just need to think about something that makes you cry.”
Eddie frowned. “What did you think of?”
Steve just shrugged. “What time are you guys leaving?”
“Tomorrow, early,” he said. “But serious, dude, even after that stellar performance, you don’t really have to come. Take the week off. Enjoy life for a change.”
Steve shook his head. “I would just be at home worried about you. Don’t make me stay. Please. Not when you said you would feel better with me there.”
Eddie’s shoulders slumped as he gave in. “Of course I want you there, but I would be selfish to take you away from your family for so long. Robin, Dustin...the rest of the them all need you too.”
Steve sighed heavily. “You’re part of that family, Eds. And I’m not dumb enough to think that they aren’t going to make a run for it the second they’re able to. As they should. I have to live my own life and not be afraid to go places.”
Eddie threw his arms in the air. “I hate when you make sense.”
Steve grinned. “Now the only remaining question is which vehicle we’re taking, Wayne’s truck, your van, or my car?”
Eddie laughed. “God, Stevie. I am so glad you’re coming with me. I needed that. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
Steve’s grin turned soft and fond. “Let’s hope you never have to find you.”
“Damn straight.”
*
“I can’t believe you’re leaving me,” Robin groused when Steve called her after Eddie left.
“What was I supposed to do when he asked?” Steve questioned, twirling the phone cord around his fingers. He leaned against the counter, keeping an eye on the door.
The last thing he needed was Keith finding out he fucked around after giving him the week off.
Robin scoffed. “Not go?” she questioned. “He obviously wasn’t serious about you coming with.”
"You know I would do the same for you," he said with a sigh. "For any of you. Plus his life has already been turned upside down enough, don't you think?"
Robin sighed. "I'm not really mad," she said. "It's just that this will be the longest we've been apart since the Russians under the mall."
Steve pinched the bridge of his nose. "Just think of it as a trial run for when you go to college."
"Yeah okay," she said resigned. "Just call me before you leave and again when you get there, okay?"
"Aye, aye, captain!" Steve said with a grin.
Robin giggled. "Shut up!" She paused for a moment. "I'll miss your stupid face, dingus."
“I’ll miss yours, too,” Steve said with a sigh. “I’ll call as often as I can okay?”
“You better.”
They talked a little bit longer until a customer came in and he had to hang up.
*
When he got home he started calling all the kids and packing for a week long trip. He wasn’t sure what he should bring in terms of clothes and ended up calling Eddie.
Eddie who laughed when he asked. “Just bring what you would normally wear this time of year.”
Steve chewed on his lip. “So I won’t get mercilessly teased about my preppy clothes?”
“Oh no, you will,” Eddie confirmed. “It’s just you don’t have to change yourself to fit in with a bunch of assholes who would make fun of you. Okay?”
Steve let out a slow breath and his anxiety went with it. He could handle that. Those assholes had never met a bitch like Steve Harrington before.
“Yeah, okay,” he said after a moment. “You and Wayne decide which vehicle we’re taking?”
“Yeah, he suggested we take his truck and your car,” Eddie said. “He knows he’s going to be taking a lot back and thinks your car will make it better than my van.”
“Sounds good,” Steve murmured, a little disappointed. “So who will you be riding with for the trip down?”
He could almost feel the grin from here. “With you, of course, darlin’.”
Steve laughed. “Yeah okay. What time do you need me at your house?”
There was a beat and then two before Eddie said, “I was thinking that you should spend the night so we could leave first thing in the morning.”
Steve’s heart sped up as his breath caught in his chest. “Yeah. Sure. That’s a good idea. I’ll show up at eight tonight, give myself a little bit more time to pack.”
“Sounds good,” Eddie replied. “Wayne suggested it because it’s a six hour drive and we want to leave as early as we can so it’s not too late when we get there.”
Steve felt a jumble of emotions at that statement. It was a relief that it was a practical reason, but at the same time it was a disappointment that it wasn’t Eddie’s idea.
He took a deep breath. “I hear that. I remember the trips to Lexington when I was kid before we started flying. They were a bitch.”
“It really surprises me that you have family in Kentucky. I don’t know why, a lot of people in Indiana do, it’s just...”
“Harringtons are so entrenched in Hawkins it’s weird to think we have connections outside of it?” Steve supplied.
Eddie laughed. “Yeah, that.”
“My parents met in college and I didn’t move to Hawkins until I was eight,” Steve said.
“Wait,” Eddie said. “No way. You aren’t a Hawkins native?”
Steve chuckled. “Nope. I’m more like you and Dustin then the Wheelers and the Byers. And the Sinclairs.”
“Huh,” Eddie said after a moment. “You certainly have hidden depths, my friend.”
“You have no idea,” Steve teased.
“Then I’ll just have to use this trip to dive deeper,” Eddie teased back.
“I have to pack, you dork,” Steve said fondly. “I’ll be over at eight.”
“See you then, Stevie.”
***
Part 2|Part 3|Part 4|Part 5|Part 6|Part 7|Part 8|Part 9|Part 10|Part 11|Part 12
Permanent tag list: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @chaoticlovingdreamer @goodolefashionedloverboi @messrs-weasley @maya-custodios-dionach @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @justforthedead89 @emly03 @bookworm0690 @itsall-taken @bookbinderbitch @redfreckledwolf @littlewildflowerkitten @vecnuthy @scheodingers-muppet @mira-jadeamethyst
425 notes ¡ View notes
xx0acidicorchid0xx ¡ 3 months ago
Text
some notes on wolverines (mustelidae) and Logan
cause new hyperfixation (its been goin on since a few weeks ago). gonna preface this by saying i have only seen the first x-men movie, and whatever else i found on tiktok n tumblr through my hyperfixation hoarding, so if anything is wrong or actually canon (or not canon) I'm sorry
notes under cut:
wolverines, while technically weasels, theyre the largest terrestrial weasel, and can weigh 26-50lbs.
Logan, is 5'3, but weighs at least 300lbs due to the admantium skeleton (195lbs without, meaning this small furry smelly man is just pure bulk)
wolverines are muscular n stocky and have thick fur (also waterproof n oily to prevent frost n such in them harsh canadian forests), are native to canada but can be found in similar environments, and are described as lil balls of violence and are extremely territorial around their food, family, and themselves (only out of necessity in order to survive the winter wastelands they live in). they also lack social skills and pack behavior like wolves
Logan, hairy beefy man, born in canada, described as an asshole, is violent n aggressive, but also severely traumatized. now with the fur, wolverines are nicknamed skunkcats because of how much they reek (they also mark whatever carcass they stole or found so nothing else can take it from em or where they buried it). if Logan (who canonically reeks) has waterproof n oily fur, it must be real difficult getting him to shower (not to mention he doesnt like getting wet) and also the water will not be able to get to his fucking skin because hes built to survive canadian woods.
wolverines are also commonly found in trees, as they use the height to locate prey and eventually pounce onto said prey
from some of the panel screenshots ive seen, Logan isnt unfamiliar with climbing onto trees
wolverines have been known to take on animals 3x their size, such as fuckin Moose, polar bears, elk n caribou, etc etc (only difference here between the mustelid and Logan is that there is no known attack on a human by a wolverine).
while wolverines have semi-retractable claws, Logan's claws are fully retractable. they (both the animal and Logan) have huge paws/hands, for the animal, its to prevent sinking into the snow
along with the thick waterproof fur and stocky build, theyre latin name gulo basically means glutton, so they have to eat a fuck load in order to maintain their body temp (usually they just eat their weight or very frequent small meals, but larger stuff is common), also theyre carnivorous but will eat anything they can find or kill, usually carcasses from avalanches n such, aka opportunity eaters
i have heard that Logan eats a shit ton, especially meat, but only large meals when alone, and small meals more frequently at the mansion. with the body heat thing, it must be super hard for him post-adamantium to keep his body temp at a normal range without literally sitting in the sun all day.
despite the aggressiveness they develop in the wild, when domesticated (which ive heard/read is super easy than you would think), they become very attached to one person, who usually is the trusted handler. they exhibit very cat-like behaviors, except wolverines actually like being picked up and wearing harnesses, they also like pets (but again, the trusted handler thing). they can become calm when hearing a high pitched obnoxious voice, and can go into a kind of trance when their gums are rubbed.
not sure about the cat behaviors n harnesses n other shit for Logan, but with the voice thing: Wade. thats all i really need to say about that
wolverines are naturally polygamous, but do come back to the female every so often to help raise the kits. theres a video of a wolverine male leaving out a moose leg near a female's den so she can have something for the kits to eat
this man gets passed around the x-men mansion like coleslaw at a southern get together dinner, aint no way hes monogamous. he does worry about the women he basically adopted and raised (rogue, laura, jubilee i think, yukio?,, i cant name any others but theres several)
wolverines also have the ability to smell a frozen carcass from over a mile away (and lemme tell ya, unless you have an excellent sense of smell, frozen anything doesnt have a smell except sharp)
this man can canonically smell emotions, and be able to tell the difference between Mystique and Storm just from smell Alone.
wolverines are very vocal, usually this kinda snarl/snort/growl/mumbling/chuff sound
not sure about comic Wolvie, but Hugh Jackman (and Logan, obviously) does snort n growl n roar n other shit like that
wolverines' mating rituals often include fighting multiple times, and mate Only after the female is confident in the male's fighting (males who return several times are more likely to mate than males who only fight once or twice) and that the female doesnt submit too easily. this is so the female and male can ensure the produced kits are strong enough to survive
self explanatory, minus the producing kits (that i know of)
also fun lil fact, wolverines' back molars are rotated at a 90 degree angle, so they can gnaw through bone easier (supposedly this is a common trait for mustelids)
not sure about sideways molars, but Logan does canonically have longer, more animalistic canines
most of my notes and how i worded some stuff is taken from wolverine expert Steve Kroschel, and tumblr user @/icarusredwings, as they have Amazing notes and headcanons on wolverines and Logan
76 notes ¡ View notes
corrodedbisexual ¡ 5 months ago
Text
Helping hands (& nails)
Steddie | T | ~5.3k | AO3 link
Written for @steddie-week Day 2: hands
Tumblr media
Featuring: Fluff and Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Homoerotic Wound Care, Flirting, First Kiss, Inexperienced Eddie Munson, Gay Eddie Munson, Confident Bisexual Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson is a Sweetheart, Eddie Munson Takes Care of Steve Harrington, Post-Stranger Things 4 Vol. 2, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, POV Steve Harrington
“You literally want me to scratch your back.” Steve groans. “Yes. Definitely, do that. Please.” “Hmm, I love it when they beg.” Steve freezes, speechless for a second. His face suddenly feels several degrees warmer. “Oh my god, shit, sorry, that was—” Eddie begins mumbling awkwardly, moving away, and Steve won’t have it. “Dude, you mind not flirting with me while I’m suffering here?”
It’s a little over a week since Vecna got defeated, and Steve’s got an uninvited guest at his house.
Uninvited is not the same as unwelcome, obviously. Frankly, Steve’s glad to have some company. Really glad. Although technically, Eddie Munson is still supposed to be on bed rest.
Doctor’s orders were two weeks; the demobats got the guy pretty roughed up, taking several juicy bites out of his torso before they all went down along with their master. He got patched up pretty quickly, but his overall weakened state from massive blood loss, the doctors’ concerns of infection and possible Upside Down creature-related consequences, and that annoying little matter of clearing him of the ridiculous murder charges all kept Eddie on a government-sealed floor of the hospital for a whole week, with no visitors allowed.
It’s no wonder that when he was finally discharged to go home, he lasted three whole days before showing up on Steve’s doorstep, unceremoniously inviting himself in and complaining about being so bored he was about to start clawing at the walls of his bedroom.
And, well… It’s Steve’s day off anyway, and his entire planned entertainment for the day was a potential lunch phone call from Robin to gossip and complain about how impossible Kieth is to survive a shift with.
Plus, at least it’s better if Eddie hangs out at his place instead of going out somewhere and doing something stupid that would get him to pop his stitches. Like climbing a tree. Steve hasn’t known Eddie for long, but in a way, he’s known enough to suspect something like that might happen.
But the best part is, Eddie Munson turns out to be really good company. For the first few minutes after the guy arrived, Steve’s a bit worried it would be quiet and awkward; after all, what did they have in common besides the whole Upside Down trauma (definitely not a fun conversation topic)? But the idea that it could be quiet with Eddie around turns out to be absolutely laughable. The guy keeps chatting about anything and everything, from how annoying it is to keep track of all the meds he’s supposed to take to random gossip from the trailer park. He’s vibrant and chaotic, and has a dry deadpan sense of humor that Steve finds himself genuinely laughing at; and pretty soon, he starts wondering if him and Eddie could actually be friends back in high school if the whole ridiculous system of social circles didn’t exist.
Halfway through some other half-finished thought, Eddie suddenly asks, “You hungry? I’m kinda starving, Wayne’s getting groceries tonight and the only option I had for breakfast was, I shit you not, a fucking box of Honeycombs, and honestly? I’d rather eat a demobat. Well, if it was cooked, maybe. Hey, d’you think roasted demobats could be a thing?”
He keeps rambling as he walks, with Steve trailing behind him, grinning and shaking his head because… well, damn. This guy sure is something else. Maybe exactly the kinda something Steve didn’t even know he needed in his life. Honestly, he’d probably say the same thing about Robin last year. Is this some profound universal balance thing? Out of something horrible must come something really good?
Read on AO3 | Divider credit
125 notes ¡ View notes
wizzdot ¡ 3 months ago
Text
The Patron Saint of One Way Trips
Ch22
Tumblr media
Description: Simon finally breaks…
Tumblr media
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
I have lost track of time. The last thing I remember is Graves climbing over me.. or wait.. Kyle..? No, Kyle is in Amsterdam.. My head thumps and my entire body aches. I should never have allowed myself to be so vulnerable in front of Graves.. he was an unmated Alpha for fuck sake.. and I was an unmated whatever-the-fuck-I-am. It was a dangerous move.
I slowly blink my eyes open and try to figure out where I am. I can't hear anyone. It smells familiar.. Whereever I am, it's pitch black and cosy. I feel around and find my phone. I furrow my brow in confusion. I quickly realise that I'm not wearing the crusty, wet, bloody Shadow gear anymore.. I'm in a massive, soft hoodie and some of my leggings that I had bought when John and Kyle took me shopping. What the fuck...?
I use the light from my phone screen to light up the room. MY NEST CUPBOARD. I squeak happily, I'd made it back.. where were the Alphas..? What had I done while I was out of it.. Oh god... I hope everyone made it home safe.. Johnny and the Lieutenant must have went after Graves.. What about Rudy and Alejandro..
It's just past midnight, I realise, when I check my phone. And it was Tuesday. I don't know how long that means I've been out of it.. I decide to get up - my stomach rumbling and my body desperately needing to get something to drink.
As soon as I stand and switch the light on, I see that I'm wearing the Lieutenant’s hoodie. I didn't know he had a hoodie.. I glance down to the cupboard and see so many belongings that aren't mine. I see Kyle's familiar hoodie, Johnny's towel (I can tell it's his because its basically a giant Scotland flag), John's boonie hat and.. wait.. is that a balaclava..? Why would the Lieutenant leave me something.. he - he wouldn't have cared for my comfort. The only thing missing, I notice sadly, is my hanky. Probably gone forever..
The longer I stand, the more and more light headed I feel. Sweat prickles my brow but I feel cold. I stumble towards the door and feel my way down the corridor, in the direction of the kitchen. A particularly harsh stomach cramp rolls from head to toe, causing me to grit my teeth and groan under my breath. I didn't want to wake anyone up, so I stayed as quiet as possible, given the ridiculous time of night that I'd decided to come round from whatever feral state I'd been in.
I finally reach the kitchen and immediately dive into the fridge. Nothing really stands out to me so I step back and look in the cupboards. I find some oranges - labelled 'easy peel' - mmmm.
I slowly peel the first orange and turn to put the peelings in the bin when I get the fright of my life.
The Lieutenant is sitting on the sofa watching me. I can’t help the whimper that falls from my lips, the peeled orange long forgotten as it hits the floor and rolls away under the table.
He stares back at me, with an unreadable expression in his eyes. He is wearing a plain black balaclava now, which leaves much more of his face exposed. It has a much wider eye hole, which means I can see the top of his nose. Oh shit I'm staring...
He clears his throat roughly. "Didn't read the note Kyle left, then" he says bluntly.
What note?! "Uhm.. no, sorry Lieutenant.. what note..?" I whisper back, nervously. Another cramp hits me but I try to control my reaction seeing as I've got an angry Lieutenant staring me down.
"The note on your door. It said to stay in your nest and text Cap if you needed anythin', too late for that now though, eh?" my stomach drops as his gravelly voice tells me how I've disobeyed orders that I wasn't even aware of..
"S-sorry, I - I didn't know.." - "Shouldn't be out here in your state, little one.." he growls.
I furrow my brow "Wh-what state..? I don't understa-"
He interrupts me with a laugh "you can't fuckin' smell yourself..? We've all been holdin' back our ruts since you fuckin' got lifted onto the Helo, clinging to Cap like a fuckin' leech.."
"Wh-what..? I don't remember.. I can't smell myself.. I don't know.." I stutter, tripping over my own words.
The Lieutenant narrows his eyes at my confusion. "What the hell d'ya mean you can't remember...?" he barks at me "What's the last thing you recall..?" he continues.
"Gr-Graves.. on me.." I sniffle - "Then.. I think I blacked out.." I sniff again - "No, you didn't black out, little one, you went feral.. think you started presenting too, Omega.." he says with confidence in his voice.
Something inside of me snaps when he uses the word 'Omega'. I hear the whine before I realise that it's coming from myself. I blush, embarrassed. He chuckles darkly "I did tell ya', little one, don't act all surprised.. you were practically begging Cap and Kyle to give you their knots in the Helo, till you passed out with your nose attached to Price's glands, that is.. Took all of John's control to stop Johnny from snatching you away there and then.. they're all pent up in the pack room right now - been two days and they still aren't out of the ruts you triggered.."
"I - I should leave.." - "S'too late for that.." he warns, shifting his legs wider and leaning forward on the sofa.
"I'm - I'm sorry.. I didn't mean to cause so many issues.." - "S'too late for that too" he chuckles.
I feel a tear drop from my eye, and I hurriedly try to wipe it away with the sleeve of the, far too big, hoodie.
"I-I'll go" I sniff, turning to leave. A large gloved hand grabs mine before I manage to step any further. "Sit down.." he grunts.
I don't respond instantly, just staring at his huge hand and how it engulfs mine - "Oi, sit down.." he reminds me, with that harsh voice of his.
I whimper but sit, obediently. I gulp as another cramp rattles through my body.
"Brave girl, just walking around ignoring those cramps that you're having.." he teases.
"Wh-what cramps..?" I try to lie. I'm not sure why I did that...
He grunts a laugh, turning away and busying himself at the counter. I fiddle with my own hands and pick the skin around my nails, anxiously. He eventually turns and hands me two peeled oranges.
"Here" he grunts. I look between the oranges and his eyes for a few seconds, he isn't a patient man - "take them and eat them.." he growls.
I obey again, nervously reaching out and taking them, pulling them apart, segment by segment, and plopping them in my mouth, one at a time. He watches me intently. I stop, about half way through the second orange and he immediately takes it from me and pulls a segment off and practically hand feeds it to me. I reach to take it from his fingers, but get the feeling that if I hadn't, he would have opened my mouth and placed it on my tongue, until I swallowed. I blush, but allow him to do whatever it was he was currently doing...
I take the last piece of orange and swallow it. "Good girl.. tea?"
I push away the whimper I want to let out when he praises me, and gently nod my head. "If you're making one.."
He moves away to the kettle, and as he turns his back, another cramp hits me. They are getting more frequent. I raise my knees, so I'm hugging myself tightly on the sofa, practically in a ball.
"The others are desperate for you to stay..." I snap my gaze to the back of his head. He stands, facing away, waiting for the kettle to boil.
"I - I don't think that's true.. they just -"
"Shh. They want you to stay. You've made a space for yourself in our pack, like it or not" - "I didn't mean to.." I whisper
"No, but you have, haven't you..?" - "I can call Laswell and ask to leave.." I offer. He growls.
"No you fuckin' won't" - "I don't understand.." I sniff, catching another tear with the sleeve of my his hoodie.
"Stop cryin'.." He rumbles - "I'm trying" - "try harder" he grunts. Jeez, helpful as ever Lieutenant..
"Don't you want to stay with them.." he asks, still turned away.
"It's - it's not that.. I'm intruding. I don't belong here.. I don't want to ruin your pack.."
"I'm not the pack Alpha. S'not my decision.." - "I don't care.."
He tilts his head, confused. Usually the pack Alpha's word is final.
"What d'ya mean you don't care..? - "I mean.. I want my own pack. A pack that wants me. A pack that loves me. I still don't even know what I am.." I sniffle.
"You're a fuckin' Omega.. how many times do I need to tell you - you've drove me fuckin' mad since the moment I fuckin' saw you"
He approaches with two cups of tea. He hands me mine, gently before sitting down across from me with his own cup.
He slowly raises the bottom of his balaclava. I snap my gaze away, refusing to look.
He chuckles under his breath at my reaction.
"Scared to look..?" he teases "scared to see the monster underneath..?"
"No.." I reply, sure of myself.
"Well why don't you take a peek then.." - "Only pack and those you trust.. Johnny told me you don't show your face to just anyone.."
"And you think you fall into one of those categories..?"
I freeze, my brain in a total muddle. I don't understand...
"You saved Johnny. Fuck - you probably saved me too, pullin' that little undercover Shadow stunt. Clever, by the way.. must admit, I prefer you in my hoodie over that fuckin' shit we had to peel off of you.." He growls. I stay silent, still turned away, trying to gather my thoughts.
"When I heard you fuckin' scream.. I'd have skinned Graves alive for hurtin' you. I couldn't bare it, almost lost my rag there and then.."
I raise my arm to wipe more tears that had started falling while he spoke.
"I'm not good with words..I'm fuckin' trying my best here.." I gulp, he sounds vulnerable. Is he letting his walls down..? Or attempting to, anyway..
"Laika..? Turn around, for fuck sake.."
I slowly turn around, with teary eyes and shaky hands. I try to hide behind the cup of tea. I keep my gaze down on my lap.
"I'm sorry" he says. My eyes snap up to meet his instantly. Deep brown eyes. Stubble - blonde? Sharp jaw and a small scar on his chin. That's all I could see.. I stare at him for what feels like forever.
"Stop lookin' at me like that.." - "S-sorry.."
"As much of a monster as you were expecting?" - "Nowhere near.. not even close.." I whisper softly.
"Tell me, would you stay with us..?" - "No.. I don't belo.." - "Why not?" - "You don't like me, Lieutenant"
A pin could have dropped, the Lieutenant goes quiet. Scarily so.
I stand to leave, I place my empty cup down by the sink and turn to leave.
I have my hand on the door handle and the Lieutenant still hasn't moved.
"It'll break their hearts.." his gravelly voice whispers. I pause, facing the door.
"I'm sorry.." I hear movement from behind me and all of a sudden I've been turned around and he is cupping my jaw, softly - softer than I thought he would ever be capable of.
"Why can't you see..?" he groans, almost as if he is in pain.
"Lieutenant..?" - "Simon.. it's Simon to pack.." - "I'm not pa..."
"I want you to be pack. I want you to stay, we all do. I can't watch you leave. I can't watch you break everyone's hearts because I'm too stubborn to open up"
*Ghost's POV*
This girl wouldn't fuckin' listen would she? I've been sat here for half a fuckin' hour, surrounded in her sweet, tempting scent, and she still can't listen.
She is about to leave. You'd be a fool to let her leave like this. DO SOMETHING YOU STUPID BRUTE!!
"It'll break their hearts.." I whisper, as she turns the door handle. By some grace of god, she stops.
"I'm sorry.."
She apologises. She fucking apologises. She is about to leave.. NO DON'T LET HER GO!!
I am off of the sofa in a flash, and she was far too easy to turn around. The way she stares up at me, all teary eyed and broken hearted. Why can't she understand..?
"Why can't you see..?" I ask her
"Lieutenant..?" don't fuckin' call me that..
"Simon.. I'm Simon to pack.." - "I'm not pa..." pack pack pack pack Omega Omega Omega
"I want you to be pack. I want you to stay, we all do. I can't watch you leave. I can't watch you break everyone's hearts because I'm too stubborn to open up"
I've said it, I've finally fuckin' said it.
I close my eyes and wait for her to say something.
"Si- Simon.." My eyes roll back and I purr. I'm Simon to pack.. She is pack..
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
"Si-Simon.."
Could I allow myself a chance at this..? Did I deserve it when I am still paying for sins that I don't even remember..
He doesn't answer me. I reach up and cover his gloved hand with my own, still rested gently on my jaw. That seems to snap him out of it.
He stares down at me with those deep brown eyes. His scent is intoxicating, almost soothing my cramps by being so close to me. I could just stand on my tip toes and sniff him.
I whimper at the thought.
"You need to stop making those pretty little noises in front of me, especially while you're covered in my scent" he growls, softly, reaching around me with his other arm and balling his hoodie into his large hand, pulling me closer.
"I'll take you back to your room. I need to go and cool off.. you and your fuckin' scent drivin' me mad".
I allow him to guide me gently down the dark hallway, his hand hovering over my lower back.
I stop at my room door and open it, turning to stand in the doorway, facing him. He stares back at me.
"What are you going to do now...?" I ask, knowing damn well that he isn't going to go to the pack room.
"Go back to the kitchen, maybe try to read a few pages of my book.."
"Don't you sleep..?" I ask - "Not when I can smell a stressed Omega a few doors away. Remember the night you had your nightmare..? That's why I was awake.."
I gulp - "Sorry.. I didn't realise I was keeping you awake.. I can put blocker spray on" - "NO - No.. I don't want that..." he corrects his tone the second time.
"I - I don't want you not sleeping because of me.."
"It's fine. Just go to bed.." I nod, stepping backwards into my room. As soon as I move away from him and close the door, pain shoots through me.
"Fuckkk" I groan from behind the closed door, only noticing Kyle's note taped to the door as I stand behind it, now.
"You good..?" he is still outside, FUCK
I clear my throat.. "Yeah - Sorry, just another cramp.. I don't know why they're happening.."
I whimper again when another painful one surges through my stomach.
"Fuck this.. can I come in, Omega..?" He growls, hand already twisting the door handle, but pausing until he hears confirmation.
"Alpha.." I whine.
He takes that as consent. He steps into the room and bundles me into his arms, shushing me and cooing at me, instincts clearly in full control.
He lays me down on the bed, stepping towards the cupboard and pulling everything out, quickly reorganising everything so it was on the bed.
"Don't think we'd both fit in your little cupboard, little bird.." he grumbles.
"You're staying..?" I whimper, trying to reach for him.
"Yes, I'll stay - just tonight" he says as he turns the lights off and clambers beside me on the bed that I hadn't yet spent a single night on.
"Just tonight.." I repeat, as if to convince myself..
As soon as he settles near me, I roll myself closer to him and rest my nose against his neck and inhale. "Omega.." he warns me.
"Stop callin' me that" I whimper - "You need to accept it eventually.. might as well get used to it..." he grumbles back.
That isn't the reason, stupid. Every time he says it, I feel a rush of heat..y'know..
"s'not what I mean.." - "what d'ya mean, then, Omega..?" he taunts
Play him at his own game, mutt..
"Alpha.." I whimper into his ear. He squeezes my hip in response, growling. "Fuckin' minx.. Understood, loud and clear.."
*Simon's POV*
I could have claimed her there and then when she moaned 'Alpha' in my ear.
My cock twitches. Behave Alpha!
Don't ruin all the progress we have made tonight.. Don't fuckin' ruin it..
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
I settle against Gho- Simon - and close my eyes.
I allow his scent to wash over me, totally soothing my cramps and making me feel safe, warding any nightmares away.
His purrs turn into soft snores at some point and I follow closely after.
*Kyle's POV*
I wake up at 6am, ready to try and restart my normal routine. My unplanned rut had only lasted a couple of days, thankfully. I leave Johnny and Cap, curled up against each other. I head towards the kitchen when I smell it.
Laika - she's been out of her room overnight. My stomach sinks - what if she'd ran away..? what if...
I'm sprinting back down the hallway in the direction of her room. I don't even bother knocking - opting to just push the door open. It was an emergency.
I don't expect to see her and Simon on the bed together. The perfect picture of peace.
I slowly back away, beaming ear to ear. A flame of hope ignited within me. She could stay. Become pack. She could be ours..
I jog back towards the pack room..
"Alpha.. Johnny.. wake up!!"
"What's the matter,Kyle?" John grumbles back at me.
"Both of you get up!! You've got to see this - C'mon, quickly.. MOVE"
"Christ - this better be important, Gaz.." - "It is, Cap.. C'mon"
I lead the way, Johnny already wide awake and bouncing behind me, sniffing the air, obviously picking up her scent.
"Shhh don't make a sound" I warn them quietly before I step into Laika's room. They were both still fast asleep.
Johnny pops his head around the door and practically drools at the sight. John purrs happily.
He steps forward and shocks me, by climbing into the bed behind Simon. Simon moves slightly but doesn't wake up.
Johnny takes that as an invitation and lays himself between John and Simon.
I step forward and brush a strand of hair from her face. Her eyes flutter open.. "Kyle..?" she whimpers.
"It's me, Love.. gonna climb in behind you, yeah..? Go back to sleep beautiful.." - she nods, turning in Simon's hold to face me.
As soon as I'm laid on the bed, she crawls into my arms and starts pushing her nose into my neck.
"Missed you, Alpha.. gone for so long.." she murmurs against me.. "Oh sweetheart, don't you remember..?" - she shakes her head softly in the crook of my neck.
"Simon says I went feral.. Omega.." - "Yeah, Love - you're an Omega, alright.. triggered us all into ruts..." I say, not able to help the shift of my hips against her.
"Sorry, Love - ignore it" I say, trying to move away and create distance, but the small bed wasn't made for five.
It doesn't matter anyway, because as soon as I try to move away, she pulls me back to her and hooks her leg around my hip.
"Christ, love. Don't move, yeah..? Just cuddle.. just cuddle" I try to convince the Alpha inside of me not to get too excited. She is lined up perfectly. One thrust and-
"Missed you.." she yawns, before resting her head against my chest and falling back to sleep.
Simon reaches around both of us and pulls us closer to him - inadvertently causing my knot to brush against her core perfectly. I groan quietly.
The last thing I hear is the Captain telling Johnny not to get jealous and telling me what a good boy I am..
93 notes ¡ View notes
olderthannetfic ¡ 4 months ago
Note
Hi I'm sorry for the incoming rant but I'm so frustrated and I need somewhere safe to yell. This is insanely long so I 100% understand if no one wants to read all this.
It’s so fucking ironic that people are trying to make publishing more friendly towards queers/women/POC/disabled people/etc. but at the same time they’re turning publishing into a fucking minefield of discourse.
I'm an autistic, bisexual woman with multiple mental illnesses and a learning disability and I'm absolutely terrified to publish anything.
Everyone keeps going “We love books by minorities! Hashtag own voices! We love to support minorities and their stories! Even if you’re not a minority, we love to see authors making characters that are! :)”
But they certainly don't act like it.
They see people like Amélie Wen Zhao or Tess Sharpe or Isabel Fall get harassed relentlessly and they go, “Well if people dogpile someone over something it was obviously because that person did something Bad And Wrong™ so if you’re a Good Person™ the twitter masses won’t have to punish you :)” except in reality that’s not at all what happens.
If your experience is not generic enough to fit every single person in a group, you’re obviously writing an unrealistic stereotype! How dare you write about your personal experiences as a mixed race Indian if not everyone can relate to it? What about the Indians who grew up in India!? You’re erasing their experiences!
You have to out yourself to prove that you’re one of the Correct People™ who’s allowed to write that experience. Oh, you’re writing a trans character? Please describe your gender, in detail, so we can know whether or not you’re Allowed or if you’re an Outsider who we need to punish. Oh, you can’t come out, because you might be killed or disowned? Well, no #OwnVoices clout for you, we don’t want your book.
Your character needs to be a Good Minority™. They cannot be angry or violent or rude. If they are, you’re clearly saying that all of those minorities are angry and violent and rude and not just that one character.
There are four additional rules you absolutely must follow at all times to prevent harassment, and all of them contradict each other:
If you’re not [minority], you need to have [minority] in your stories, because they exist and it’s bad if all your characters are [not minority].
If you’re not [minority], you cannot have [minority] in your stories, because you’re not [minority] and clearly, you’ll never be able to understand how [minority] thinks and acts because you’re not them.
If you’re not [minority] you can still have them in your stories, but they can’t experience any discrimination at all, or talk about their culture or experiences with being [minority] because that’s not your story to tell and you’re profiting off of their trauma. No, you’re not allowed to do this even if you hire ten sensitivity readers that confirm these experiences are realistic and correct.
If you’re not [minority] you can still have them in your stories, but you need to show their experience with discrimination, and have them talk about their culture or experiences with being [minority] because if you don’t, then you’re basically just taking [non minority] and pretending they’re [minority].
Also, there’s an additional surprise bonus rule: Sometimes people will just want to destroy you for no reason, so watch out!
They’ll take things from your story, remove them from their context and then present them as the most horrific, problematic thing possible in order to create a hate mob.
Sometimes, though, they don’t even know what they’re talking about. People who are not part of a minority group (or not the one relevant) will see something, go, “Omg? Problematic?” and post it on Twitter so they can say, “Um guys wtf is this shit? Are you fr? Can we talk about this?”
And the worst and most horrifying part, people will blame YOU for the harassment campaign!
I’ve literally seen people say, “Well if someone calls you out on Twitter you should admit you did something wrong, apologize, and tell them you’ll do better :)” as if that’s not the most insane, victim blamey shit.
Like, I cannot fathom seeing a marginalized author get torn apart by a mob, get sent horrific death threats, and have their career and life ruined, only to say, “Okay but they must have done something Problematic. Have they tried publicly flagellating themselves to appease the people who are threatening to break into their house and kill them?”
People just sweep it under the rug and pretend that it’s not a big deal, and say, “Twitter’s not real, it doesn’t matter!” as if thousands of people harassing you and sending you threats isn’t massively damaging to someone’s mental health. Like, this is the kind of shit people kill themselves over, and it's apparently no big deal because "Twitter's not real"? What?
Writing is supposed to be fucking fun! Showing your beloved story and characters and work to the world is supposed to be enjoyable!
But instead of writing my story and just enjoying the process and adoring my characters, I’m sitting here, absolutely terrified, trying to make sure I give people the least amount of ammunition to destroy my life as possible.
One of the main characters in my story is vaguely based on me. I love her with all my heart, I think about her all the time, I want people to love her just as much as I do.
But instead of having fun writing about her, I’m waking up in the middle of the night, heart pounding, thinking to myself, what if she’s too problematic?
Will people get upset with her saying the word “cunt” or bathing naked with men (and thus having her tatas out) and accuse me of being sexist or catering to the male gaze or not being a Good Amazing Feminist™? Will people call her a pick me?
Will people get upset with her being bisexual, but ending up in a “straight” relationship with the male character? They have a five year age gap, is that too much? Will people think he’s a predator or abusive? Is their relationship toxic?
Will people think he’s a creep for flirting with her and getting into her personal space and telling sexual jokes, even though that’s how I want someone to flirt with me?
What if people think she’s not autistic enough? Will people get mad that she’s ~glorifying violence~ for not becoming a pacifist and admitting that violence is bad and yucky at the end of the story?
I need to make sure she spends ten paragraphs explaining exactly why she works as an assassin. I need to sit cross-legged and whip my head around like Dr. Strange in that Avenger’s movie so I can imagine Every Possible Discourse Outcome™ and make sure she debunks everything people could call problematic.
I need to change that. I need to remove that. I need to make her sanitized and good enough so that I'll be safe.
And then repeat this thought process, with every other minority character in my story (and there are a lot).
--
Things are bad, but if you stay off of book twitter and do not write YA, you're a lot less likely to face this level of drama. There are always exceptions though, like Fall.
83 notes ¡ View notes
charliehoennam ¡ 6 months ago
Text
beyond the badge pt. 2
a/n: special thanks to @strangergraphics-archive for the cute divider <3
pairing: david loki x f!reader
summary: his fianceĂŠ is abducted and a distraught david realizes some rules must be broken in order to save the one he loves.
warnings: 18+, dark themes such as language, violence, eventual smut, suicide, death, physical injuries, threats, blood and abuse of law enforcement
SHARING IS CARING, SO REBLOG IF YOU LIKE IT
one | three | four | five
Tumblr media Tumblr media
David's entire demeanor hardens like stone. His thick brows furrow and his pupils dilate with a controlled madness glooming beyond them.
His posture straightens as his eyes grow dark and determined, instilling fear in his captain, complete with a fleeting chill that runs up his spine. He wonders if this is the final drop that will send David into spiraling chaos.
Taking the bag of newly found evidence along and completely forgetting that he shouldn't, David turns quickly to march back to his car.
A rage-induced adrenaline surges through his veins. He's more than hellbent to continue his own personal investigation, now that he knows where to start.
“Loki, don’t do anything stupid. You gotta be smart here," O'Malley tries to reason, although he's sure David's anger nulls out all the noise around. "Loki, where're you going? Loki!"
He ignores his captain’s orders as he slams his car door shut. The wheels skid loudly as he backs up out of the parking lot and onto the freeway, leaving behind black tire marks on the cold asphalt. O'Malley knows he's up to no good.
He suspects David knows something they don't, which means he's withholding information. So, he calls Loki's phone, but the calls just keep going to voicemail.
As much as David hates to admit it and bend to the will of a criminal, he knows only a deal with the devil can bring you home.
“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” he curses pounding his bandaged fist against the steering wheel.
The car swerves, causing passing cars to honk impatiently, but he’s able to shift it back onto the lane.
At this point, he can barely feel his hand anymore and he’s almost certain it might end up in nerve damage. The bandages he had wrapped over his knuckles dampen, intensifying the red marks as they bleed through the material.
David might be a cop, but he is never afraid of getting his hands dirty to get what he needs and he knows just where to start.
Tumblr media
“Hi, honey! I’m sorry, I know you’re busy, but I just wanted to call and thank you for the flowers” you beam through the cellphone.
He can almost hear your smiling. On his end of the line, he frowns to himself wondering what flowers you could be referring to.
“They’re so beautiful, Dave! I can’t wait to get them in the kitchen. They’ll look so pretty on the island.”
“What? Babe, I-I don’t – I didn’t get you any flowers” he frowns standing confused in the precinct’s breakroom.
“Of course you did, baby” you laugh softly lifting the card to read. “It's gotta be you. Who else would it be?”
“No, sweetheart. I’m sorry. I didn’t get you flowers. I wish I had, but it’s not from me.”
“What? Dave, i-it has to be. The delivery guy confirmed my full name and work address. H-he confirmed the delivery. And-and there’s a card too. “You know what I want. See you soon. Love, D”.”
“Baby, they’re not from me.”
“David… This is getting too weird. First, the phone call. Now, the flowers? This can’t just be a coincidence.”
"Maybe it’s-it's just a mistake. It could be for someone else in the building or-"
"You mean there's someone else that works at the same place I do with the same name as me?"
"Maybe they got the address wrong or something."
"David, this doesn't feel right. Something feels wrong about this. It's really starting to freak me out."
“Hey,” he pauses as he steps over to close the breakroom door. “If this really is Donovan, he can’t do shit, alright? He’s in upstate in federal prison. He can’t get to us.”
“He doesn’t have to be free, David. People like him have contacts. They always have someone in their pocket.”
He can hear the worry in your voice. He understands you're scared, but, in his defense, he's seen plenty of these psychological mind tricks and empty threats from criminals before.
“No one is coming after us, alright? It’s just mind games, baby. They’ll get tired soon and they’ll stop, ok?”
“You need to tell someone, David. You need to tell O’Malley about this. This is not normal and I’m starting to get fucking scared.”
“Baby, it’s gonna be ok. I promise. I won’t let anyone hurt you or me.”
“I don’t wanna keep looking over my shoulder, David.”
“You won’t. Ok? It’ll blow over soon. I promise. I’ve seen this before.”
“You have?”
“Yes. They’re all bark and no bite. Just scare tactics to try and get what they want, but that’s all it is.”
“You promise?”
“I promise, alright?" A moment of silence lingers on the call. He knows he hasn't convinced you that everything is fine, but he's got mountains of paperwork on his desk to finish up." Listen, I gotta get back to work, sweetheart.”
“Yeah…” you nod to yourself, still disturbed by the situation. “Yeah, alright. Go, baby. I’ll see you at night. I love you, Dave.”
“I love you too, beautiful.”
Tumblr media
His hand pulses with pain. The migraine throbbing in his skull reminds him of his lack of hydration and nourishment.
He’s been solely running on coffee and short 30-minute naps he’s taken on his late-night drives, searching for you, torturing questioning suspects that may be involved.
He’s given the department plenty of time to do their job but now, he needs to do his since he has now has the only piece of the puzzle that his fellow brothers-in-blue don’t.
He knows what he's about to do is far from correct procedure. Yet, in moments like these, he knows guidelines can only help him so much. This could be his only chance at getting you back.
Reaching his injured hand into his pocket, he takes his phone out. Ignoring the calls from O'Malley, he dials Michael Kemp’s number.
David had met the chubby and bubbly fellow years ago. Many of the fellow cadets would try to discourage Mike from accomplishing his dream of entering law enforcement. They would call him hurtful names and make fun of his size all the time, until David put an end to their bullying and befriended him.
They graduated together and have been friends since then, meeting up occasionally to catch up over a few beers.
Kemp encouraged David to become a detective meanwhile he, himself, preferred the calm desk duty working with evidence instead of criminals.
“Hey, Loki. What’s up?”
“Mike, are you still on evidence lock-up?” David doesn’t have time to bother with formalities.
“Yeah, man. Why?”
“I need the 500K we processed in the Donovan case.”
"What? T-that's evidence though. It's supposed to be collected by the bank. I can't just pull that much money without anyone noticing."
"I-I know, Mike. I realize this is a lot to ask for, but I need this, man. Please, just tell me if you can do it" David stutters desperately pleading.
“Do you realize I could lose my job and face time for that?” Mike lowers his voice to ensure no one can hear him.
“Yes, I know that, Mike. But this is some fucking serious shit, man. C'mon, I-I'm fucking desperate here! You gotta fucking help me out! Donovan's got my fianceé! I need to fucking get her back alive!”
He sighs taking a moment to try and calm himself down, remembering Kemp’s passive nature. Mike's one of the good guys; the kind of person that reminds him of the people he wants to protect.
“L-Look, Mike. Listen to me. I know this is off the record and you're risking your ass for me here, but I-I got a plan, alright? I can bring the money back into evidence. I just need Donovan to think he’s getting his fucking money back for this work, so can you do it or not?”
Kemp stays silent on the line, fueling David’s despair. Although this violates all the rules that Mike is sworn to follow, he knows David would do the same for him if the tables were turned.
“Mike!”
“Y-yeah, yeah. Hope you know what you’re doing, man.”
“Fuck… T-thanks, man.”
Arriving at a low-rate neighborhood widely known for drug-related activities, David comes to a rough stop in front of a house. The owner of it is two of Donovan’s slimy lackeys and brothers known as Ray and Vinny Becker.
The brothers used to sling drugs for him when Donovan was still free. David had cut a deal with Ray when his younger brother Vinny got jailed up on a drug bust: information on the big fish in exchange for his little brother's freedom.
Now that Donovan had been pinched, most of his 'loyal' buddies had all scattered, but Ray and Vinny remained, hoping that false loyalty could make him believe they didn't have anything to do with his imprisonment. So, if anyone could reach him without leaving tracks, it’d be them.
Gun in hand, David knocks on the door and turns away to hide his face out of concern they might not answer if they know who he is. He waits until the door creaks open to the limit of the door chain lock.
“The fuck do y-“
Before Vinny can finish his question, David quickly pushes the door in with his shoulder and slams the young man’s head against the wall, breaking his nose before shoving it into the mucky carpet on the floor.
He presses his gun to Vinny’s head as the older brother stands from the couch, lifting his hand to reach for the .9 millimeter on the coffee table, which is laden with cocaine, half-full ashtrays and thick rolls of money, tied together by rubber bands.
With no time with small-talk or warnings, kneeling on Vinny’s neck, he aims at the older brother and shoots a bullet into his leg, forcing Ray to fall back on the couch and grip at his thigh.
Shoving his gun back against Vinny’s head, the heat of the recently fired weapon burns his scalp. He groans and withers at the pain, kicking and screaming as the scent of burning flesh and hair fills the air.
“You know why I’m here,” David states with an eerily steady voice as Ray eyes the gun on the table. “Try it. Go ahead. I’ll shoot your brother too, I swear to fucking God.”  
The smart detective knows their background too well to know Ray would do anything to protect his younger brother at all costs. Although Ray is in his late twenties, Vinny is still a kid just barely over the ripe young age of 18.
Distress pervades the stern detective, who stares down the older criminal with dark, empty eyes.
Ray refuses to take that risk well aware that David isn’t one to fuck around. He makes the smart decision to keep his brother alive and leans back on the couch sweating bullets as his hands put pressure to the wound on his leg.
“You’re gonna call your boss, tell em I got his fucking money.”
“C’mon, man. You know we don’t got that kinda power” Ray sneers.
“Yeah, you do. And you’re gonna do it, or I’ll tell Don who put his ass in prison.”
Ray pants heavily as he looks down his panicked brother and back at David. Everyone knows that snitches end up in ditches. If word gets out about their betrayal and false fidelity, Donovan won’t stop until they’re dead.
“The old mill on Oakland Falls, tonight.”
As Vinny grunts against your fianceĂŠ, Ray silently agrees with unspoken words.
David storms out of the house, tucking his gun back in his holster and quickly climbs into his car to race back downtown. As he drives, he checks his phone and sees Mike’s message.
“Good to go. Come by at 7.”
Having no other option, he drives to the station to finally come clean about everything to his captain. He doesn’t care about the backlash; he doesn’t care about possibly losing his shield. He cares only about getting you back alive.
O’Malley doesn’t take the news so lightly and gives David one hell of an earful for not having told him about the threats, no matter how small they might have seemed. Although reluctant, the captain decides to give him a chance to get you back.
They’ve got nothing else to lead them on except for the evidence found and being processed at the motel and David’s confession.
He knows this can go terribly wrong, but it’s their only hope of not ending up with another dead body floating in the river like Donovan’s previous victims. He orders Chemelinski to continue as first-in-command on the case, but allows Loki’s participation.
While the detectives and a team of uniformed officers plot in the briefing room, David’s phone rings with an unknown number. He excuses himself and steps out of the room to talk in private.
Even though there is no number on the screen, he suspects it’s from a burner. He lifts his hand while his body tenses with apprehension. It can only be one of two people and he wishes it’s you.
 “About time I got your attention, detective,” Donovan’s grizzly voice chuckles. “You’re one stubborn son of a bitch. I gotta admit, I thought cops were better at protecting family. I been told she’s quite the fighter. You like ‘em feisty huh?”
David’s rage seethes within him as his fist balls, stretching the wounds on his white and numb knuckles.
“Are we doing this or not?”
“Don’t get your panties in a bunch, detective. I got your little message, so I’ll tell you what. No fucking guests. I want you and you alone with my fucking money. If my guys see anyone that’s not you, she’s dead. You hear me? Fucking dead.”
“Midnight then. You know where.”
The call clicks and ends.
David walks toward his desk while the team of offices and agents huddle in the conference room. He sits at his desk and takes the smiling photo of you and him stood together in front of your Christmas tree last year.
His thumb caresses your cheek on the glass as if it were your real skin. He misses you so much. He just wants to make sure you’re ok and all he can do is pray this one shot he has works out.
“I’m sorry, baby,” he whispers. “Should’ve listened to you.”
He closes his eyes as he mentally repeats the words. The guilt and regret bubble inside him again like a pressure cooker on fire.
Another explosion of rage erupts from him as he pushes everything off his desk in one swift movement. The meeting halts as all the eyes in the briefing room move toward him and watch his outburst through the window.
“Should’ve! Fucking! Listened!” he shouts to himself, slamming his keyboard against the desk, keys flying everywhere as he throws it to the floor.
While he slams the portrait onto the hard surface on his desk, O'Malley rushes out of the room to contain him as the uniformed officers follow him out, bracing themselves to do their jobs as if David is any other desperate citizen.
"I know, Captain" David affirms as he stands and holds his bloodied hand up to stop them.
He shakes the broken glass from the picture and tucks the treasured image into his pocket. Storming out of the station, he makes a quick stop at the nearest convenience store to pick up a carton of red Marlboro and a light, returning to his bad habit that he'd left in the past.
Sheltered by the store's awning, he sits quietly on the sidewalk with his back to the exterior, smoking one cigarette after the next in his bandaged hand.
Taking the crumpled photo from his pocket, he holds back his threatening tears as he admires the photo of you both together. He stares at your smile wondering if he'll ever get to see it again.
He would never forgive himself if he didn't.
126 notes ¡ View notes
vagabond-umlaut ¡ 2 years ago
Text
paper planes
Tumblr media
brother to fushiguro tsumiki. (unofficially adopted) son to gojo satoru and you. nephew to a host of sorcerer uncles and aunts. (unwilling) assistant to the white-haired idiot. and, finally, ringbearer at your and gojo's still-undetermined wedding.
one teeny-tiny boy with one too many identity is what fushiguro megumi is - until he isn't. with lots and lots of sniffles and sniggers...
▸ gojo satoru x fem! reader; established relationship; post hidden inventory arc; manga spoilers; proposals; adoptions; alternate universe happy for everyone except toji lovers (sorry >︿<)
Tumblr media
▸ two fics in a week, wow. guess this is what is called a brainrot, huh? read this post by @/mintmatcha on tumblr and started writing this lol. but the plot of this story is miles, tons, eons away from that post, i swear. also, this fic is set in the same universe as blue hawaii but you need not read that first to read this. treat this as a stand-alone if you wanna! 😊 anyways, gif, divider and characters ain't mine. please don't plagiarize, translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️
Tumblr media
"yeah, yeah, i've got it all planned."
a discreet eye roll is all megumi gives as he goes through the menu card in his hands. a little distance away, he can spy tsumiki and you seated at a table, you tying his sister's long hair into braids while the latter laughs, probably at a joke you cracked.
a tiny smile rests on the little boy's face at the sight - which vanishes when he feels a large hand tousle his hair. you had spent hours and hours righting his hair into a proper shape; why must this idiot always mess everything up?
megumi looks up to find his guardian looking down at him with a shit-eating grin; though he can clearly see the nerves it's covering.
idiot.
phone wedged in between his ear and shoulder, gojo mutters a "one sec, suguru," and crouches down to the boy's eye level. the latter gives back an unimpressed stare.
"decided what you wanna have, 'gumi? remember mom and sis there asked you to choose for them today."
megumi feels an urge to say you two aren't his real parents - but stamps it down instantly. the both of you have been as good as real parents can be to their kids - or maybe even better. the boy has read books, watched movies and listened to his classmates talk about their families; the tiny urchin-head knows.
with a huff, he points at the double chicken fillet burger box - it's tsumiki's favourite and you too don't seem to dislike it. with a nod, gojo rises and placing his orders, returns to the call, beaming expression again directed at megumi.
"yeah, yeah, don't worry, man," he speaks into the phone, then drops his volume to a mere whisper, "'my little kiddo here is a born actor. he remembers the entire plan, step by step - don't you, buddy?"
megumi gives an imperceptible nod, itching back to get back to the table. he already would have - needless to say, the little munchkin prefers your company to gojo's, way way more - but their orders have not been delivered yet and the boy promised to be-
a little tap on the shoulder draws him from his musings and he cranes his neck up to find gojo frowning. "no, megumi didn't want to discuss the plan with me before leaving. no, he doesn't like you better- hey," the man looks at him, sunglasses sliding down the bridge of his nose revealing his indignant gaze, "you wanna discuss with uncle suguru one last time?"
an indifferent shrug is all the reply he gives.
while uncle suguru isn't the best uncle he has, he isn't the worst either. the others are- oh, wait. the others include uncle kento and uncle yu. they are literal angels compared to him. so... maybe... he is the worst... never mind. it's too late to back out anyways.
grumbling, gojo hands him the phone. "hello uncle," megumi greets just like you and tsumiki have taught him to. the man behind mutters something along the lines of ''traitor" or something; the boy pays him no mind.
"hey champ," the voice floats over the line, pleasant, kind and the way people talk to babbling babies. megumi's bored face turns irritated. "let's discuss the semantics one last time before boarding your flight, okay?"
"yeah, okay," megumi says, and casting a sideways glance at his bundle-of-nerves guardian, continues, "we're going to reykjavik," he looks at gojo, silently asking if he pronounced it correctly. the man sends him a thumbs-up with an encouraging grin.
the kid continues, "the plane will land at noon day after tomorrow, which is mom's birthday. first, we will go to the hotel. then, after resting, in the evening, we will head out in a car to watch the northern lights. and then-"
"-when it's the right moment, your dad will pop the question to your mom and you'll click the camera. got it, mr. future ringbearer?" finishing the rest of the sentence for him, the man at the other end asks, sounds of pans clacking and food sizzling in the background. nana-chan and mimi-chan must have woken up.
megumi nods. "yeah, got it, mr. future best man."
a chuckle comes in response to his comment. "you're a lot like your mom, y'know?"
"yeah," he mumbles, waving back to you and tsumiki, a little smile on his otherwise-impassive-but-always-adorable face, "i know."
"good," the man says, then pauses when a loud crash booms through the air and through the phone, a set of two wailing voices following it not soon after. megumi can quite literally picture the wincing frown his uncle is wearing as he says the next words in a hurry, "okay, 'gumi. talk to you later. bye, and best of luck! satoru's counting on his little assistant."
"yeah, thanks," he responds but is too late - the call is already cut by then.
giving the phone back to gojo, who's tapping his sneakers-clad feet on the floor, he looks back ahead, wondering when the hell heck their token number will be displayed and when they will get their food.
to the kid's great relief, it doesn't take a lot of time.
before long, the four of you are seated around the table, gojo stealing a sip from your drink and you stealing fries from him, all the while tsumiki giggles loudly at your antics. megumi smiles, before he hides it behind the burger which he takes a bite from.
the four of you really look like a family, don't you?
"hey, guys, can i have your attention for a sec, please?" your sudden question startles him from his mind. the boy turns to find you with your usual grin, albeit a smidgen of anxiety can be found in the way your fingers drum on the table.
megumi shares a look with tsumiki and gojo. they look as confused as he feels. "do i have your attention, people?" you ask again, manner growing a tad solemn unlike your usual, though the affection is still evident in your tone.
gojo and tsumiki nod immediately. you turn to him, gently smiling, "can i have your attention too, 'gumi? please?"
the boy nods his head instantly. "yeah, yeah. sure," he replies, scooting his chair closer to yours. you send him a relieved smile. "good, 'cause what i'm going to say next is very important. so, listen to me carefully, 'kay?"
all three of them are eager to nod in affirmation and anticipation.
scouring through your backpack, you retrieve a couple of pretty important-looking papers, and placing them back on the table, clasp your hands atop them. the kid spots gojo shoot you a worried look to which you respond with a reassuring smile.
the man's frown fades a little.
gaze now darting from one kid to another, you begin, "you two know, right, we love you very much?"
"yeah!" tsumiki exclaims, but is quick to fall silent when megumi shoots her a glare. you proceed, lips pressing into a thin line, "but we cannot adopt you two, in spite of how much all us want it to happen. we tried to, many, many times. but those higher-ups just won't let us do that."
a second passes - one wherein his young brain registers your words - before, lower lip wobbling, the boy casts his gaze down upon his light-up sneakers.
is this where you'll say he'll be sent to those zen'ins? away from his sister? away from you and gojo? away from all his uncles, aunts, nana-chan and mimi-chan?
megumi feels a hand card through his locks gently. looking up, he finds you with a soft smile. "but the thing is 'toru and i didn't let them defeat our purpose. we thought, you two can choose to be my clan's wards. not 'toru's, because of fucking - sorry, please forget i said that word - i meant, idiotic clan politics. so, what do you think?"
megumi turns to his sister, a pensive look plastered on her face the way it is on his. gojo adds, a tender smile in place of his usual stupid grin, "no pressure, kids. the both of us won't love you two any less and will be equally fine in case you choose not to."
"you guys can take how much ever time you need to think. there's no hurry," megumi hears you say, your warm hand rubbing circles on his back, as he turns back to his half-eaten burger.
a long moment passes.
passengers enter the cafeteria, they leave the cafeteria. the four of you remain seated, quietly munching on your food.
the boy finally removes his gaze from his now-empty tray and sends an inquiring, confused, hopeful look to his sister. tsumiki smiles back with a tiny nod. the little kid feels his heart burst with joy.
"we want to," the two of them answer in unison, and within a fraction of a second, megumi finds himself swept up in a warm hug alongside his sister, by you. "thank you for giving me, for giving us a chance," he hears you mutter quietly in a tear-choked voice. the boy simply pats your back the way you do to him. he soon feels another set of arms wrap around the three of you.
megumi thinks he has never felt happier or safer than in this moment.
a while passes with the four of you in this manner, enwrapped in an embrace, before you all finally pull away from each other.
the boy returns to his seat, rubbing his eyes. a minute passes in composing all of yourselves before you state, munching on another fry, "so, step one, including tsumiki and megumi into my legal family is done and successful. thank you, my loves."
tsumiki beams back at you; megumi returns a tiny smile. you grin at them - which, the kid watches, turns slyer as you switch your focus to your boyfriend.
the little boy stares at you, then stifles a snicker - he thinks he has a pretty good idea of what's gonna happen next. his gut instincts are rarely wrong, after all.
"but, 'toru..." you drawl, grin giving way to a smirk as gojo smiles back - perplexed but loving all the same. "for the step two, making you my legal family too, guess i need to wait to say 'yes' until the northern lights viewing two days later... don't i?"
a beat passes, then another, and another.
a loud gasp sounds from tsumiki. megumi turns to his dad - who's gaping wide-eyed at his mom now, the man's face whiter than his ugly hair - and smirks. just like the imp the goggles-wearing idiot always calls him at home, despite you repeatedly telling him not to.
gojo looks back at him, shock written on, engraved into his features.
"though i didn't really help you propose, i'm still the ringbearer, right?"
Tumblr media
▸ masterlist
779 notes ¡ View notes
bluehourbucky ¡ 2 years ago
Note
Oooooo yes. Oki it's a bucky/reader
Reader was an asset at the same time as bucky and her orders were to keep him safe at all costs, so even if it ends with her taking a bullet. So they've had an intense relationship and hydra being hydra uses it against both of them.
Fast forward to the snap, she doesn't get dusted and manages to escape hydra. She meets nat who helps with her trigger words. They don't fix her since shuri is gone but ends up tweaking it so she's really only listening to her handler- nat or bucky as that's a default lol.
Come to the blip and her and bucky reunite and he has some lingering winter solider tendencies when it comes to her and being protective af. So Sam being sam notices it and gives bucky shit. He snaps and essentially says that she reminds him of hydra and can't stand her.
So typical angst troupe. She avoids him until they get put on a mission and she gets triggered. So bucky ends up taking care of her. Can be smutty lol. Like any part of this can be used. Doesn't have to be the whole thing lol
a/n: Hope you don't mind I simplified it cus I think I'd need more than one part to write all of this properly!!!
Hope you enjoy reading this I put all of the angst into it 😅😅
Sorry this is so long 😅😅😅
MY FIRST REQUEST EVER!!!!
To forgive
pairing: bucky x exhydrasoldier!reader
summary: tension between you and Bucky is unbearable and when a misson goes wrong apologies are in order
warnings: f word couple of times / angst a lot of it
masterlist
_______________________________________
Sam actually doesn't know how he managed to get stuck with not one but two super soldiers who have a staring problem but this is his reality right now.
Recently you and Bucky have been staying with Sam since you two could not live with each other alone anymore.
Bucky became your roommate after everyone came back after the snap.
At that point you were 5 years free of Hydra and mostly recovered, you had been found by Natasha and she had helped you a lot and so has Steve. Steve already had experience watching his friend struggle with what had Hydra done and his heart ached seeing his friend in you. The same lost and broken expression made him sad.
They did everything they could, Natasha and Steve even bought you to Wakanda but without Shuri the progress was slow but it was still progres.
Steve before leaving talked to both you and Bucky and suggested you two could help each other out since there was no one else who could understand more what you two had lived through.
It had been good in theory but in practice it was not.
Buckys' recovery was way past yours, and it frustrated you, you were angry especially because you still had this need to protect Bucky at all times.
Being Hydras punching bag was not fun, you didn't blame Bucky it wasn't easy for him either but he was so precious to them that they needed someone to protect the most important asset. It wasn't like you were the only one, you just survived the longest. There had been many before you, who had been removed or just killed in a mission to protect The Winter Soldier.
To Bucky, you were just a reminder of the torture he had survived. Some nights neither of you slept because the same nightmares haunted you, and yet you didn't talk to each other.
You both remember very little about each other from your time in Hydra, the pain is the only thing you both remember so clearly.
It had become impossible to stay together the night when Bucky had a nightmare and you had tried to help, it was awful. That night when Bucky woke up he had thought he was back at Hydra because he saw you. He yelled and screamed and even attacked you, telling you to let him go, and you didn't even defend yourself immediately going back to your training with Hydra.
"Protect the asset no matter what. your life is not important, the winter soldier must be saved. Do not hurt the asset or you will be punished."
That night had changed everything. The weak friendship that you've had with Bucky vanished and all you ever did was fight.
"The dishes aren't washed princess."
"Can the Winter Soldier throw out the trash sometimes?
"Does princess need to be reminded to not use all the hot water."
Oh but the missions are the worst for everyone.
Sam started to bring a spray with him whenever you and Bucky even try to speak to each other because sometimes it is so unbearable that it could ruin the mission.
Sometimes against your wish you jump in to protect Bucky, the Hydra training instincts rooted deep inside you.
"You don't have to protect me!"
"I don't have a choice here asshole! If it were up to me I wouldn't care less if something happened to you!"
But when Bucky had jumped from an airplane without a parachute your heart had dropped. And it was not because your instincts had kicked in, you had watched the man you've been protecting many decades jump from an airplane that was like 30000ft in the air!
You put a parachute on you and brought one with you and jumped after him.
"Dumbass you forgot something!" you had yelled over the wind catching up to Bucky.
He'd ignored the parachute you tried to give him and left you to just watch him descend.
You have no idea how he survived but you were pissed off and were ready to kill him yourself.
"ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE? WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU JUMP WITHOUT A PARACHUTE!"
"WHY DO YOU CARE IT'S MY PROBLEM IF I JUMP OR NOT!"
"NOT IF YOU ASK ME! I LOST MY LIFE TO PROTECTING YOU AND YOU DO THAT! YOU'RE SO SELFISH!"
You had pushed him hard enough so he stumbled a bit but that's only because he didn't expect it. Bucky had also received a slap to the face which Sam might have enjoyed way too much. It had caused an actual fight between two of you and it took Sam 30 minutes to separate you. By the time you had to fight people you had come to fight in the first place you and Bucky already had battle wounds.
Tonight you're in Madripoor and the plan was that Bucky pretends to be The Winter Soldier, it made you nervous.
Sharon had give you a dress and some flat boots in case you needed to run, Bucky and Sam had received some very nice suits.
When you saw Bucky in a suit your heart flipped at the sight of him. You've never seen him in a suit before and you weren't sure how to feel about it. He looked handsome, it's not the first time you had that thought but usually there was annoyance clouding any other thoughts about Bucky.
When Bucky looked at you as you exited the room you were changing in his brain and heart malfunctioned. He'd never seen you in a dress before, you preferred clothes that covered your body completely - the scars on your body made you feel very insecure - Bucky was the same the more his body is cover the less attention he has on himself.
But God, have you taken his breath away. It isn't like he thinks you're ugly, you're gorgeous, and if you had known each other back when he was himself and before you had been brainwashed to protect him he would've loved to have taken you to a dance. Unfortunately your situation was too complicated and it had made it impossible for you two to have any kind of relationship not only romantic.
Bucky and you have a very awkward moment where you made eye contact and then quickly looked away. The tension in the room grew to a 100 real fast.
"So ugh about the plan." Sam coughs to fix the awkward vibe that has enveloped the room.
While Sam is explaining the plan you and Bucky glance at each other when the other isn't looking and Sam pretends not to notice.
The club is crowded and the atmosphere changes when people start to notice The Winter Soldier.
You're on edge the entire time.
Suddenly a fight begins but all you hear are the trigger words which do not affect Bucky but you're entirely a different story.
As Bucky was about to get punched you had jumped in front of him stopping the hit with your hands. You break the the guys hand and turn around to hit another big guy.
"Get out of here I will take care of this."
"No you won't."
And when you don't Bucky pulls you by your hand and you have no choice but to run with him.
When you finally arrive at a safe destination away from everyone who's trying to kill you Bucky turns to you.
"ARE YOU SERIOUS? WHAT HAPPENED IN THERE YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO WAIT! ARE YOU SO STUPID YOU CAN'T FOLLOW SIMPLE INTRUCTIONS?"
You only stare back at him not even blinking.
"Bucky stop she's not okay can't you see?" Sam puts a hand on Buckys shoulder backing him away from you.
"She fucked up she wasn't supposed to engage."
"Bucky look at her."
That's when Bucky notices that you're not looking at him you're looking at the floor, your hands behind you as if waiting for punishment.
And suddenly it clicks, your trigger words. Some of them were the same as his.
"I'm so sorry. I- I didn't notice I'm so sorry."
You stay in your place not moving an inch.
Bucky tries to touch you and at first you flinch, he doesn't know what to do - he hugs you, surpsing himself.
He stands there his arms tightly around you.
When you finally come back you start sobbing and Buckys heart breaks. He was supposed to know better.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry I should've known I should've said it was a bad idea I'm sorry."
You're shaking in his arms and his heart breaks a little more with every whine.
It takes you 45 minutes to stop crying and that's only because you've exhausted yourself with crying.
Bucky carries you to a dodgy motel that him and Sam found. Your limp body in his arms makes him feel incredibly guilty. He feels awful, he'd been awful to you for months and you're right he's been selfish. Bucky can only hope you can forgive him.
You wake up with a headache the light coming through the window indicates that it's for sure not early morning. The sun is gentle and you can tell that sun is about to be gone. To the right of you there's a night stand and to the left is Bucky sleeping on a chair, sitting up.
You notice that you're in Buckys shirt and your pyjama pants.
"Hey."
You turn at Buckys voice.
"Hi."
"I'm sorry about last night I was out of line. I've been out of line for a while. And I'm really sorry I've put you in danger-"
"Bucky..."
"No I need to say this, please."
you nodd.
"There's so much I regret but I regret putting you in danger and giving you shit the most. I've done nothing to make your life easier I've only made it worse. And you were right I was selfish. I was in my head too much and you're the only person who completely understands what I've been through. Last night shouldn't have happened but I was stupid. I hope you can forgive me and I'll do everything in power for the rest of my life to make it up to you."
"Bucky... I-... What happened to us is not fair and we both did stuff we regret, I also wasn't fair to you. I'm not okay. I haven't been a while and last night wasn't your fault. I'm sorry too. I'm sorry for calling you The Winter Soldier and for hurting you purposely. And you have nothing to make up for nothing that happend is your fault."
Bucky and you stand in silence for a while each trying to process words and the situation you're in right now.
"Fucking Hydra."
Bucky breaks the ice with that statement and you both laugh.
"Bucky, could I ask you for a favour?"
"Anything."
"I haven't been well for a while and last night only showed how much I need help. I'd like to go to Wakanda so they get me in cryo to fix my brain. Please be there for me when they put me under and when they wake me up."
"I promise."
True to his word Bucky is there when they're preparing you for cryo.
"It's going to be okay. These people are the best they know what they're doing. Besides they had their experiment animal way before you!"
"Oh shut up..... Thank you Bucky. I'll see you when I wake up?"
He smiles and gives you a tender hug full of emotions but mostly love.
"I promise."
The last thing you see are Buckys blue eyes looking at you softly he doesn't let himself cry.
The next time you see Bucky is when your new life begins.
_____________________________________
[THE END]
This is gigantic udhdhdudud I'm not sure If I should've written so much but it was fun?
Likes reblogs and Comments are appreciated <3
632 notes ¡ View notes