#So my mind is like aa... Um.... Help?!

[mrfoox]

Haven't seen or heard an life sign from Fabian in almost a week and idk if I am allowed to ask for one after 6 days of silence 😭

[sky-high-standards]

Yandere!!Fairytale characters!!Dark Reverse harem xFemale reader

I recently edited this

Part 2 here

You always loved stories for as long as you could remember because every night until you turned 8 you had dreams about coming to visit these story book characters but strangely they were your age in these dreams and were incredibly possessive and kept going on about how you would have to get married to one of them when you grow up.

When you were 9 you stopped reading fairy tales and these dreams stopped too.

8 years later~

You where just minding your own business when your mother came in and told you that you had to donate some old toys to a charity shop, you lazily got up and went to your attic where you kept most of your childhood things. As you searched you picked up the story book that you haven't seen in 8 years, a wave of nostalgia came over yo as you flipped through the pages. Suddenly aa portal came from the book and sucked you in.

Story 1 Cinderellis

You found yourself in a castle when someone suddenly bumped into you. You were surprised to see a beautiful woman wearing gorgeous clothing and a crown probably the queen giving you her hand to help you up she apologized and then gasped taking a closer look at you.

Queen: y/n is that you?

Y/n: Um yes?

She beamed and hugged you.

Queen: y/n my dear its been so long you're all grown up and so beautiful!

y/n: Queen Charming?

Then it all came back to you .You where in the castle where you used to play with your old friends Ellis and Johnathan. The queens son Johnathan saw you as a little sister and the queen saw you as a daughter but Ellis was the son of a wealthy man who was very kind and had a close friendship with the royal family. You remember Jonathan was vey protective and teased you a lot while Ellis was very sweet and incredibly shy and was very clingy towards you but he had this dark side and hated competition.

Queen: Just call me Caroline dear.

She smiled warmly at you seeming euphoric to see you again.

Caroline: Come quickly we must tell Jonathan you returned he will be so happy to see you.

So she lead you to the vaguely familiar room belonging to Jonathan

When he turned around you could barely recognize him he really has grown up.

Johnathan: y/n?

You nodded and he then tackled you into a hug like when you were kids.

Johnathan: I knew you'd come back dummy!!!

y/n: You really haven't changed a bit huh Johnny.

After you three caught up you found out Ellis's dad had died after you left and he now lives with his stepmother and his two stepbrothers they stopped seeing him after they met his stepmother.

Caroline the told you that she was gonna plan a ball for your return and to find a wife for Johnathan she sent out invitations to everyone in the land including Ellis and his family.

Ellis's home

Ellis was doing his usual labor because his mother treated him like a slave ever since his father died. His step family now just calls his Cinderellis due to him always being covered in soot. Ellis barely got anything to eat and was always given ragged clothing to wear. His stepbrothers mad sure to make sure he feels and looks terrible because they are incredibly jealous of Ellis because of his looks and all the female attention he gets.

After all these years Ellis hadn't forgotten about you but how could he ever since he met you he had been madly in love with you so much so that he worships the ground you walk on and would do anything to get your attention and much much more to get you affection but after you left a piece of himself left too he was absolutely devastated but he never lost hope that someday you'll return.

When an invitations to the ball came Ellis didn't care but he jumped for joy when you saw that this was for your return finally, he'd see his beloved again.

He told his Stepmother, and she told her sons to try and get you to fall for one of them now Ellis didn't like this and poisoned his family that day, after all Ellis never liked competition.

After the murder he disposed of the bodies he then dressed in one of his fathers suites and daydreamed about how soft your lips where or how happy you'll be to see him he can already picture you running into his arms proclaiming your undying love for him and how you'd never leave him again you'll be his in a matter of time.

Back at the castle

You were getting ready for the ball when a blinding flash of purple light came, and you saw a woman with a wand and beautiful purple wings in front of you.

???: Oh hello dear.

y/n: um who are you ma'am?

???:I'm your fairy Godmother I'm here to help you get back home.

y/n: Why? everyone is so nice here.

She went silent for a moment looking at you sympathetically.

Godmother: Things aren't always as they seem my dear...you have to save Jonathan if you want to make it to the next story.

y/n: WHAT IS HE IN DANGER??!!!AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN NEXT STORY??!!

Godmother: Keep it down, yes he's in great danger and you have a few more stories to complete before you get to go home.

y/n: what do you mean?

Godmother: I mean in each of the stories you will live in you will have a task when you complete it you will be sent to the next story but if you fail a task you won't be able to leave when you were younger you made every one of the male leads fall for you and now their obsessions have grown in an unhealthy way so be careful I'll see you soon.

and then she left just like how she came with without warning and in a poof of purple light.

The ball had begun and you couldn't stop worrying about Caroline and Johnathan. You were shaken out of your train of thought when a young man asked to dance he seemed pretty exited even euphoric and...love sick?

Nonetheless you agreed and he swiftly took you to the the center of the ball room as you two danced you couldn't avoid his stare it was so intense but those gray blue eyes were just` too familiar then it clicked.

Y/n: Ellis...?

He smiles at you and nodded.

Ellis: Did you miss me little mouse?

you smiled back at him and hugged him and he was in pure bliss finally you're back in his arms oh how he's dreamed of this day everything was perfect until he saw those pretty eyes of yours start to lose focus on him as you kept glancing at Jonathan this made his blood boil he was always second place to Jonathan when it came to you he always got your attention but now he's finally snapped he's had enough.

When you left to go check on Caroline he pulled out a vile of poison the very same he used to kill his step family.

Ellis: I didn't think I'd have to use it so soon.

He mumbled coldly.

He was about to pour it into Jonathan's glass when he heard your voice and he quickly his it into his pocket smiling at you, you asked to speak to him privately and he was taken back when he saw you crying and he immediately went forward to comfort you only to be pushed away.

Ellis: Little mouse what's wrong.

You stared up at him with a mix of hurt betrayal and confusion.

Y/n: I saw what you were about to do Ellis...I don't understand, Why would you try hurt him.

Ellis: why? because I love you y/n I love so much that it drives me insane I love you so much that I'd kill anyone in a heartbeat just for your attention I love you more than you will ever know little mouse~

All you could do was look up at him in fear as he caressed your cheek smiling at you with a sickly-sweet smile.

y/n: what happened to you? You were so sweet so kind and so selfless.

Ellis: Oh y/n you happened to me.

you saw a deranged glint in his eyes and his smile turned more sinister.

Ellis: You turned me into this.

At that moment you knew there was no reasoning with him so you had to be with him until you get sent to the next story.

y/n: Ellis I'll be yours if you promise not to hurt anyone else.

You could tell he was more than euphoric hearing those words come out of that pretty mouth of yours it sent him over the edge.

Ellis: I promise Little mouse.

For about 5 months things where perfect for Ellis waking up and knowing you are there being the only one able to kiss your soft lips it was pure bliss until there was a flash and you were gone.

You were falling out of the sky and splashed into the water you tried your hardest to swim but couldn't you were about to drown but you were rescued by a strange being and all you could remember was its voice.

Tell me if ya want me to continue and please give my other yandere stories some love.

God loves you get plenty of sleep and stay hydrated

[eff-plays]

So my problem with AA stans claiming to be "dark romance enjoyers" is that it's uuh. Incorrect.

I'm a fantasy romance writer and I have been in the same circles as dark romance enjoyers and writers. Like full on omegaverse non-con type shit. I don't like it myself and think it's wack, but the reasoning of the people who enjoy it is that they have lingering shame around wanting sex, around purity culture, potentially homophobia with men who enjoy omegaverse stuff, so a bigstrong alpha man who forces them to enjoy something they secretly want is a sexual fantasy to them. They can hold onto that "purity" and "innocence" and not have any shame around wanting sex, because technically someone else is forcing it on them. They can explore that safely within fiction, and don't necessarily want that to happen to them IRL, unless it's within kink scenes etc. And yeah I don't get it, but it is something people do and own doing, and I can't stop them so as long as they're doing it over there, it's none of my business.

But AA fans claim to love the "dark romance" of it, but then turn around and say that no!! He's NOT abusive!! He's NOT going to assault or mind-control Tav, it's NOT an unhealthy relationship, they're EQUALS and he ADORES them and won't disrespect them!! Just look at the backlash to the "kneel" kiss, people who got so mad that Tav looks distraught.

But look at what BW said in the infamous Discord screenshot: it's fine to enjoy the fantasy, but it's not healthy in-universe. The game itself says "maybe you enjoy degrading yourself."

But AA stans looked at that and went "UM NO!!! IT IS HEALTHY!! I'M BEING SHAMED!!! >:(" and "OH POOR BABY THINKS HE'S BELOW US AND THAT'S WHY HE THINKS WE'RE DEGRADING OUTSELVES!!"

And that's where my problem stems from.

An actual dark romance enjoyer would be like "ough yes Daddy Astarion brainwash me and make me your brainless little fuckdolll sex slave and make me take your cummies every day." Not "YAAS BABE YOU AND ME ARE EQUALS AND PARTNERS IN CRIME UWU UWU UWU (ignores all the red flags and pretends they don't exist)!!!"

So like. You claim you enjoy dark romance, but you're constantly, desperately trying to erase the actual, in-game, canon darkness of it. Any hint of it you try to excuse away, or blame on the writers, or say is OOC and wrong.

You whine and complain about "fixers" and "moralizers" and "fandom police," but you yourself are policing the very romance you claim to enjoy by sanitizing it and making it into something more palatable instead of accepting how dark it actually is.

I've yet to see any AA stan have a Tav who's like a brainwashed sex slave, or in an abusive relationship with AA. All of them are just girlbosses who are co-rulers, which leads me to believe you don't enjoy "dark romance," but privilege. That's the thing that gets you off, privilege and power, particularly a priveleged and powerful man putting you on a pedestal and giving you whatever you want, taking care of you, letting you get away with bad things because he has the power to make all your issues go away. (Is this why so many AA stans are also Russian ... who said that)

And that's FINE. But just admit that? Admit that Astarion's story isn't what draws you to him, that you just enjoy the idea of a beautiful man who has power sharing it with you, and AA just happens to have those surface-level traits if you don't engage with or misinterpret the source material. Hell, I'm a villainmancer myself, who's writing a villain origin story for shits and giggles where a girl becomes a war criminal with the loving help of her edgelord goblin king.

But y'all don't do that. And that's the problemo, lads. You made up a story in your head that isn't in the game, you idolize that story, and get mad when people go "Wait, that's not in the game???"

[pumpkinrootbeer]

imo there is something to be said for how Lip is consistently placed in the position of protector/parent. Obviously we see him take care of all his younger siblings, especially Liam. But beyond that from very, very early on in the show we see him have a strong vested interest in protecting kids, like when Karen is going to give the baby up for adoption; "Now, uh, do you check the, uh, families for, you know, um, alcohol and drug abuse? Make sure they have enough income to feed it and stuff?", "But they're still good families right? You make sure they're going to decent parents?"(s2.8)

Or in s3.4 when he convinces Mandy to help him rescue her half-sister, Molly. "She sounded desperate. Let's see if we could get her, let's see if we could help." and "If she ran, it was probably for a good reason, no?"(s3.6). Of course there's the entirety of season 4, where he's not only willing to drop out of college to look after Liam but then is afraid to even let Liam out of his sight for almost the rest of the season. And then, obviously, there's Xan in season 8 & 9, a complete stranger but still a kid in need who he then helps without question. He also gives Xan and her mom ten thousand dollars.

Also in s4 (sorry just a really good Lip season in general), it's Lip who realizes something is wrong with Ian and goes looking for him (s4.5) and then it's Lip who takes care of Fiona after she breaks parole (s4.10). On top of which, the only reason Lip is even going to college, despite vocally saying he doesn't want to numerous times, is because it'll help his family if he gets a good job; "Except the little ones Debbie, and- and Carl, and- and Liam, and, my sister Fiona. I could be there for them but I'm not. You know, 'cause I'm here. 'cause I'm told that, that's something I could do for those kids, in a big way, in a real way.' (s5.8)

This perception that Lip both doesn't care about Fiona (or the rest of his family) and doesn't do anything for them is such a misconception. Obviously, there's everything he does to help in s4, from picking up Fiona in Wisconsin to stealing food and cooking dinner every night, but there's how he does try to help Ian, like in s7.3 when he convinces Ian to take his meds. Or in s9.6 when he does a gig as a sober coach to get Ian money for his commissary account in prison. And, then, of course there's how Lip is the reason Fiona goes to AA in s9, both by convincing V to not enable Fiona, "What kind of friend do you want to be? The kind that sees her drunk at the Alibi every morning?" and also by telling Fiona, "Get to a meeting."(s9.12).

I think it's also worth mentioning that Lip only kicks Fiona out once she starts being a danger to the kids in the house, "I'm not letting you stay here! Not with Franny, and not with Liam. No fucking way."(s9.12) Keep in mind, the previous episode he had to body block Fiona to keep her from yelling around and at Xan.

It's just such a wild misreading of the text that Lip is callous or selfish in regards to his family, and especially in the context of Fiona and their relationship. When people say that Fiona always took care of Lip and he never gave anything in return, or that he pushed her to take care of their whole family and never stepped up, I think they're just willingly choosing which parts of the show to engage with and which to ignore.

Obviously there's the age gap, she's 5 years older, (in s8 Lip says he's 23 and Fiona says she's 28) so I'm not sure how much you guys wanted a 4 year old to pitch in when you bring up what she was doing at 9. But beyond that, when Lip got old enough to help, he did. We see him helping throughout the show, we see him stepping up and caring for everyone including Fiona. And it's not just Fiona he was helping, he did Kev and V's taxes, he was the one who came up for the plan to keep Debbie out of jail in s1 when she stole the baby. He helps JimmySteve throughout season 1-3.

And at the exact same time, Lip ends up having to solve most of his problems on his own or he just never brings them to Fiona in the first place. When she does find out he has something going on, her advice usually boils down to telling him to fix it; "So what are you going to do?"(s2.5) "Make it right with Ian."(s2.6) "You want to piss away every single chance you get, including this job, that's your business but don't drag me into it."(s7.10) It's also interesting how in her big "I was nine" speech in s7.12, Lip is the only one she doesn't mention.

Honestly the only character we see actually looking after Lip during his struggles with alcoholism is Debbie throughout s6 and 7. ("I don't want you to end up like Frank" being the reason he goes to rehab, "Do you need us to hide the beer?", "He's trying to get sober Frank!", and of course her confronting him in s7.11 when she finds out he's been drinking and makes sure he's going to a meeting.)

I wanna make it really, really clear that I'm not blaming Fiona or anything other character. I honestly think it's actually really compelling story telling that Lip is the sibling Fiona has a completely different dynamic with and that he's the one she consistently leans on. Not to mention, Lip clearly struggles to accept help and is pretty closed off emotionally. (Almost every big scene we see regarding their family he shuts down and goes silent.) But! I do think there's just this wild misconception with Lip's character that he's ungrateful, selfish, and uncaring towards his family. Yes he's prickly and rude and arrogant, but he's also incredibly caring and that's been a consistent character trait since day 1.

[lem-argentum]

HIHI UM BEFORE I MAKE ANY DT POSTS here’s all of the commentary i had from doing the post-ew quests a few months ago :’>!!! JUST FOR CHRONOLOGICAL CONSISTENCY IN MY LIVEBLOG TAG….. THESE PATCHES WEREN’T MY FAVORITE BUT I HAD FUN 💛💛💛

I LOVE ZERO I LIKE HER SO MUCH AND SHE IS SO APLATONIC TO ME. 💛✨💛✨💛 even though they go the ‘ooo realizing the meaning of friendship~~’ route with her — she’s apl. i believe this in my heart. <33 (the line where a kid goes “you don’t know what a friend is???” and she goes “what. you Do?” <333)

this game honestly does fanservice so rarely that when the es.tinien working out scene came up i was likeWHAT????????????? . i feel like i dodged a bullet that they decided to do this with him instead of th.ancred or something because it would’ve been so over for me.

i enjoyed the ru.bicante and bar.bariccia fights a lot >:D!!!! ESPECIALLY THE LATTER I THOUGHT HER MECHANICS WERE REALLY FUN AND CHALLENGING, IT WAS THE FIRST TIME I HAD TO LOOK UP A VIDEO GUIDE BECAUSE THE TEXT ONES WERE TOO COMPLICATED HFNSKN. <33

^*WHO* GAVE HIM PERMISSION TO SAY THIS STUPID GAY SENTIMENTAL LINE. I WAS *NOT* PREPARED FOR HIM TO GIVE THAT ANSWER I WAS SO WHFKZHKEJFKD ??????!!?!/!/? !!!!!!!!!!

^AND THIS PART OF HIS CODEX ENTRY. OW!!!!!!!!!!!

THFNE QUESTS ON THE FIRST. AA HHHHHHHH .WAA AAHHHHH. WAAAAH (<-shadow.bringers fan.) so emotional about it. seeing everyone doing well and being excited to see me and talking about my friends and cheering us on :’). weh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THE R.YNE AND ZERO MOMENTS. AAHH TvT <333!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

^THIS EXCHANGE. I COULD CRYYYYYY SHE’S SO CUTE. MY DAUGHTER. EHEHFKNWMW <333

i liked gol.bez’s story.. and v.rtra and az.daja were so sweet i felt for them. waugh. </3 void quests good!!!!!!

GAIA SHOWING UP MADE ME SMILE TOO. I ASSUME SHE’S ONLY THERE IF YOU’VE DONE THE EDEN RAIDS…?? IN WHICH CASE, YAY. I LOVE U EDEN <3 ^^

kr.ile’s pictomancer outfit is SOOO CUTE. I LOVE HER AND AM SO GLAD SHE’S GETTING STORY FOCUS. (and hashtag ff.vi win, relm mention) <3333

the themes raha represents touch me more than any other character and whenever she turns towards me to say something one-on-one i’m immediately like Okkkk you’re about to try to make me cry. okay. sure. thankyou. 💛

THAN & URI BEING MYSTERIOUS WHILE ALSO GOING TO THE SAME DESTINATION IS SO. HELP. because rudy would ABSOLUTELY ask if he could invite them along or at the VERY LEAST tell them about it + how much he’ll miss them, assuming him and than would be together by now. SO THEY’D HAVE TO EITHER LIE TO RUDY OR DELIBERATELY AVOID HIM WHICH ARE BOTH SO WNFKDJFKD. idk we’ll see where the canon writing goes later or whatever. <3

and non-story related thoughts from when i was playing:!!!!

i got rudy the cool pvp background for his reaper portrait and INSTANTLY when i did a roulette someone complimented it. immediate payoff. thank u red mage in bardam’s mettle <3

i had the sweetest leveling roulette experience in vanaspati where the healer + other dps were both new and i had only done it once, we all died on the second boss except for the paladin so we were all just cheering her on & emoting at her in the chat from outside the arena EHEDFN <33. and then on the third boss it was just me and her who survived so we did it together and ough :’). she kept casting clemency + cover on me to keep me alive and i made sure to keep her in crest of time returned-range and awwh it was so fun . we won and all cheered about it afterwards ehehe <)!!!!!!!!!! <3333

so many of the songs in this game use motifs from other ones and i’m only just now noticing most of them and i’m losing my mind about it . i swear every time i start humming along to one i go WAAAAIT A SECOND…………. (the tomorrow and tomorrow lyrics are in the background of the crystarium night theme. the sharlayan themes use stuff from flow. WHERE IN TIMEE ALL SHALL AS HOPEE BE REBORNNNN. AAHHHHH)

^on a similar note, i’ve been seeing the end.walker title screen this entire time and never thought anything of it but now whenever i open it i’m like TALES OF LOSSSSS AND FIIIIIIRE AND FAIIIIITHHHHHHH 🎶🎶🎶 <333

I LEVELED ASTROLOGIAN TO LVL80 SO I DID THE SHB HEALER ROLE QUESTS AND IM SO WWWAAAHHMFKDNFK. ARDBERTTTTTT. and GIOTT. IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE NPCS EVER NOW I KNEW I WOULD LIKE HER AND SHE IS SO AWESOME AND SHE SHOULD BE IN MORE QUESTS. THANKS. I MISS HER ALREADY. <3 THIS IS MY BELOVED DWARF WHO MAKES FUN OF ME AND HITS THINGS WITH HAMMERS <3333

i want to do all the shb role quests because AGHGH WARRIORS OF DARKNESS/!!!/!!!! but i do *not* want to level a tank class ever TwT. but that + magic dps i will do eventually….. for shadow.bringers………. 💛💛💛

[currymanganese]

I did a pre-relationship prequel to my two other Sydcarmy fics, in which Carmy gets some triggering news and Syd helps to take his mind off of it. Songs mentioned within the fic are found below:

It was still early in the morning, Carmy and Syd were the first to come in, as they usually were, and as they gave the kitchen a quick walkthrough and a once-over they were spit-balling ideas for slight changes and additions to the menu for the upcoming Mother's Day weekend. It wasn't too long before Nat arrived, falling into companionable conversation with the two before she made her way to the office. 

She caught Carmy's attention just after they'd finished closing and saying goodbye to the rest of the team later that day, and took him aside privately. He and Syd were going to head to her Dad's apartment as Carmy had begun to make a habit of driving her home at night; Nat didn't want Syd to overhear. 

"Hey, Bear...Um, Mom's sixty-sixth birthday is coming up next month..She asked me to invite you? She said she wanted to host the dinner herself, if you don't mind...." Carmy's face screwed up in confusion, "Mom?? Donna?" he choked out. Syd sat waiting a little aways in his car, but was still able to make out the sheer bewilderment on his face. "Yes, Donna, that's our Mom's name Carmy." Nat rolled her eyes slightly and went on, "Look, I'd understand if you don't come, that's fine...But, um, she has been doing a lot better lately, a-a-and if you ever wanna see for yourself the door's open, no pressure, Bear, okay?" 

"Okay." 

"Alright." Glancing over in Syd's direction  and nodding, she tacked on, "Mom said you can bring a plus one if you show-"

Carmy cut her off instantly, "Nat, stop. Just stop. I'll think about it okay, but it'll just be me if I do show up." He sounded pained as he refuted what she'd implied, "You know it's not like that between me and Syd, and even if it was..." He sighed and shook his head, he didn't say any of the quiet parts out loud, "I know you love Mom, Nat, and I love her too, but I don't trust her yet..I care about Syd too much to let her have a front row seat to our family shit-show if the dinner goes belly up like it always does." 

Nat relented and squeezed his arm reassuringly before saying goodnight and walking towards Pete's car. He waved goodnight to Pete and entered his own vehicle, apologizing to Syd for the delay. "Um, no problem..Is everything okay?" she asked. At his mild grimace she laughed, "I'll take that as a no.....You can talk about it if you want, or not.." she quickly added. Carmy sighed as he pulled away from the curb. "No, I'm okay, thanks..I'm good," he got out eventually, but he didn't sound convinced even to his own ears. 

After another deep sigh he finally admitted to what had made his hackles rise, "Mom's birthday dinner is coming up." It wasn't that they were still estranged or anything, his mother had since come in to the restaurant a few times since opening, and had maintained her best behaviour. His 'step-father', 'Uncle Lee', that sack of shit, had died in the previous year, and by some miracle, instead of spiralling further into drink and grief, she'd started AA a few months after Nat's baby boy, Michael, was born. She was supposedly seven months sober, they hadn't managed to prevail upon her yet to begin seeing the therapist that Carmy and Nat had started seeing, but still she'd made respectable progress. Syd knew about said progress so she replied, breaking up the long pause, "Uh, okay...Your Mom's dinner, this is gonna be a problem because?" 

"Mom's hosting it." 

"Ohhhh." Syd nodded in understanding and whispered, "Shiiit!" 

"Yep." Carmy replied. Syd had innocently assumed that Nat had asked him to arrange a dinner for their Mom at The Bear. She had heard enough about Berzatto family dinners by now, to know that Donna stepping into the role of host and homemaker was a whole other 'sensitive' ballgame, to put things mildly.

As Carmy drove they continued on in peaceful silence until he pulled up before her home. She had been sneaking looks at him during the short trip though, and she didn't like the way he clenched his jaw the whole time, and the way he held on to the steering wheel as if he was holding on for dear life. So before she exited she took a gamble and asked, "Uh, Carmy you wanna come upstairs and hang out for a while? My Dad's coming home soon and I can fix you two something to eat, the three of us can have dinner together.." 

Carmy fought back the look of surprise on his face and beamed at her, "Uh, okay..Sure. Thank you!" "Very smooth Carmy", he hated on himself internally, but couldn't help smiling all the way up the flight of stairs to the apartment. Although he'd met Syd's father many times by now, either at The Bear, or in the handful of times they'd tried out new recipes at Syd's place instead of his own, Carmy surprised himself at his own lack of nervousness. It'd be the first time he and Syd hung out together this late at night. 

At the door, they both shrugged off their jackets and toed off their shoes. There were some slippers under the small table in the hallway that they put on before they ventured further into the house. Syd was feeling every bit as nervous as Carmy was not, but she was glad to she that she'd successfully taken his mind off of things for a while. She washed her hands and bustled about in the kitchen, pulling out ingredients for a simple chicken rice pilaf. Carmy contentedly sat on the other side of the kitchen island and watched her set to work as they made small talk and cracked jokes. 

They'd been swapping stories about the weirdest meal requests they'd received from customers when there was a quiet lull in their back and forth. Carmy slipped on a slightly far away look on his face. He swiped his hair back from his forehead, carding his fingers through the strands, and suddenly blurted out, "Do you know she threw up on me in a parent-teacher meeting in middle school?"  Syd was absolutely aghast, and gently eased the knife she'd been attacking some chicken parts with down to the cutting board. "Your mom?" She began shaking her head and grimaced, "No Carmy, please tell me she didn't do that." 

At her horrified expression, and partly because of his own embarrassment at making such a random non-sequitur of a confession, Carmy couldn't help barking out a laugh which also set Syd to some nervous giggling. Her brow was still furrowed in disgust but his heart somehow felt lighter as he continued, "Yes, she did. Um, some older kids had started beating on me after school whenever Mikey couldn't come pick me up...Uh, they'd, um- called her in to talk about it and she was still hungover, I guess." 

He said it with a smile, as if it was funny...A wave of sorrow over his fucked up childhood hit Syd directly in the chest, so she turned away so he couldn't see her blink back tears. "Fuck! I'm so sorry.." was all she could manage to say. Carmy soothed her, "It's alright..It's alright-" and it killed her to hear the genuine smile in his voice. In the past she'd agonize over sensitive conversations like this if they ever came up with friends, they somehow always left her feeling like she never knew the right words to say to comfort someone, or had her thinking that maybe God skipped her over when handing out extra emotional intelligence. 

She steadied herself though, and turned to him wearing as neutral an expression as she could've mustered up, she didn't want him to think she was pitying him after all...He was still smiling at her when it all suddenly clicked and she spoke her intuition before she thought better of it, "That wasn't even the worst thing she's done to you, is it?" The smile fell away from his eyes immediately before it evaporated from the rest of his face. He pursed his lips, swallowed, and shook his head. There was her answer, no. It wasn't. He began to blink rapidly, as if trying not to cry, and Syd cursed and flayed herself internally for making him feel even worse instead of breaking up the tension with humour like she usually would. She nervously turned back to the kitchen and washed her hands at the sink. "Uh..D-do you want something to drink? I'm sorry, I forgot to ask earlier-" 

Carmy cleared his throat and reined in his raw emotions, "Um. No. It's okay, it's fine, really." Sensing the distress that was pouring off of her in waves, although her back was turned, Carmy kicked himself internally for bringing his Mom up again, and struggled to reassure her, "Syd, don't worry...I'm okay, it was a long time ago..I'm fine, really." And they both knew he was lying. Syd's heart was hammering away in her chest as she racked her brain to find a way to cheer him up and change to subject, but her nerves calmed somewhat as she took in his words. 

What always made her feel better when she was at her absolute worst? Could she share that part of herself? Fuck it, it was worth a shot, she thought and breathed out, "Uh..Hey, I'm not tryna' be a dick or rub this in your face or anything..But, um, do you wanna maybe meet my mom?" Carmy looked mildly confused for a second and said, "Um, sure?" Syd laughed at his befuddled look and dried her hands on a kitchen towel, "Relax, it doesn't involve a ouija board, I promise. Just give me a minute-" Syd made a mental fist-pump as she heard him burst out laughing as she went to her Dad's room to fetch their family photo album, and to collect her phone from her bag. 

Before she set her items down she started to excitedly stammer on about her Mom, "Umm, this sounds kinda pretentious, but my Mom was like an amateur 'world music' collector, although Dad said she hated that term, she said it was too like, white people-y, um I mean Eurocentric, but uh- she left behind a lot of old records from all over the place- they kinda, well not really kinda- they really fucking help me when I'm really stressed out- they're pretty chill actually-so, uh, it doesn't sound as good as vinyl-and some of them were CDs too- So I digitized whatever I couldn't find on streaming and also made a playlist. I could share it with you if you'd like- shit! I'm rambling aren't I-" 

Between Syd's concern for him and the adorable way she was sharing something that was so personal about herself, just for him, Carmy was fucking melting. He was smiling at her while blushing profusely, he blinked and interrupted her, "Uh, no. It's fine, I'd love that Syd. Thank you, that'd be great, I mean it." Syd breathed a small sigh of relief and made a dramatic show of placing her Mom's photo album on the counter before him, "Young sir, I present to you, Her Majesty, Hélène Lovell-Adamu." He thanked her as she connected her phone to the living room's bluetooth stereo and placed her Mom's music on shuffle, and he quietly thumbed through the album before she turned back to continue preparing the meal. Her mother was gorgeous, she was also so shockingly young. He felt a pang of regret that she would never get to see the wonderful woman her daughter had become. 

He'd never heard the first song that began to play before, he hadn't expected that he would have, and he paused to listen. A woman's soulful voice dispelled the silence, 

"Never knew what a fool I was until I met you,

Never knew I'd give my heart and you would be untrue,

The whole world told me I was wrong to be with you,

But my mama told me- I would never fall,

I was born to shine!" 

Out of his peripheral vision, Carmy could see Syd had stilled as the second verse began. She turned to face him as the vocalist continued, 

"Ever since I was a child, they tried to keep me down,

Everything that I did- it was oh so wrong!

Let me tell you something- I'm gonna do what I wanna do!

Cause my mama told me I would never fall,

I was born to shine!" 

Carmy was shocked to see Syd's eyes were watering, she blinked it back and laughed nervously over the chorus, 

"Shine, baby, shine!

Let them see where you're going to!

Shine, baby, shine!

Let them follow you!

Shine on!��

"My Dad said- this was one of the choruses my Mom used to sing to me before bed...When they knew that she was getting worse..I don't remember that." 

"Fuck!" Carmy's face crumpled and he couldn't help but swear. "Yes, fuck, indeed-" Syd softly agreed. As the music continued, the sound of her Dad's key jangling in the door lock broke the moment, Syd dried her eyes with the fabric of her shirt's sleeve using her forearm and turned back to the stove where the pilaf was already bubbling away. Carmy cleared his throat and stood as Mr. Adamu entered through the front door, and greeted him when he came to investigate the source of the music and the lovely smell wafting from the kitchen. 

He greeted Carmy in return and as Carmy sat back down, he looked between him and Syd, his expression giving nothing away, and he sat next to Carmy at the small island countertop as if Carmy lived in the place for just as long as Syd did. "Goodnight baby, what are you making?" Carmy couldn't be sure, but her Dad sounded amused for some reason.

"Chicken pilaf," Syd lowered the heat and spoke over her shoulder, "it should be ready in about 15 minutes." 

"Ooh, thank you. I'm looking forward to it," came his easy reply.

"Today was a long day, what was business like for you guys?" he prompted Carmy as he placed his hands on the counter and nodded at Carmy. 

Carmy began relating some of the foibles and triumphs of The Bear's kitchen that day and Syd's Dad noticed the photo album that Carmy still gently held in his hands. "Huh," he thought to himself, "she brought out her Mom and her own baby photos for him." He smiled and laughed along to Carmy's choppy recounting of the day's events, and at Syd's interruptions when she supplied moments Carmy had missed. Emmanuel Adamu hadn't known what to make of Carmy and his partnership with his daughter at first, he'd resented him after seeing her hurt and angry after she'd quit because of his foul tempermental outburst at The Beef. To his shock and trepidation they'd patched things up relatively quickly and they plunged into opening the new restaurant together. 

It didn't take long for Mr. Adamu to suspect that there was something that the two of them were hiding from him, or at least lying to themselves about, where their relationship was concerned. He had an inkling that there was something between them the first day he met Carmen during lunch at The Bear, both he and Syd came out front to serve his meal, grinning proudly and shushing him when he insisted they didn't have to come out and see him. They didn't stay out front for long, but in the short time that Syd introduced them to each other and they exchanged pleasantries, he saw the way Carmy looked at her when she spoke. Carmy looked at her as if he hung on to her every word, and as if he was memorizing her face to map down every detail. 

Later on, to make matters worse, or better, provided that everything worked out between them, when they came over to try new recipes together he saw his 'no-nonsense' little girl, now a young lady really, snorting and laughing at Carmy's dry jokes, his mundane comments, and his shy smiles, as if she was in the audience at a Richard Pryor special. Once, he'd even seen Carmy reach out to smooth Syd's eyebrows with his thumb, after she'd slightly mussed her natural brows after pulling on a sweater over her shirt before they left the apartment after one of their home cooking sessions. Carmy had pulled his hand back quickly at Syd's momentary look of confusion, before motioning to his own brows with his hands, "Um, you kinda messed up your eyebrows." Syd had then yelped and scampered off to fix them. Although she denied everything anytime he brought Carmy up to tease her, he was beginning to hope he might actually see his and Hélène's own grandchildren yet. Despite his approval, however, Mr. Adamu decided to bide his time and not to meddle between the two of them. 

By the time Syd was plating up the meal and Mr. Adamu grabbed some drinks from the fridge, the music had segued from K. Frimpong's Hwe Hwe Mu Na Yi Wo Mpena, to Poncho Sanchez's Baila Baila, and Paco de Lucia's Rio Ancho. As they sat down together, Stevie Wonder's With Each Beat of My Heart started up. The food was a delight and the company was even better, although Carmy felt himself flushing at the way the ballad's lyrics eerily reflected his own emotions. Syd and her Dad kept up the flow of conversation between bites, and Carmy was happy to just listen in to them as the playlist glided to Bob Marley's Stir It Up. At one point, he'd clearly missed a turn in the conversation though, he'd been looking at Syd, but Syd was now looking at him wide eyed, was she embarrassed about something? And Mr. Adamu, who sat to his side, turned to face him as well. At Carmy's apparent confusion, Mr. Adamu helpfully supplied what was previously said while Carmy was lost in Syd's eyes, "Sydney was telling you, that she doesn't know if it means much, because she doesn't really remember her-" 

"Dad!" 

Sydney's father pressed on with a twinkle in his eyes, "-but she thinks that her Mom would have liked you if she'd met you." There was a long pause as Carmy went crustacean red-pink. He chuckled nervously and Syd groaned inwardly, silently berating herself, "Oh my God, why the fuck would I say that aloud?!" Carmy perked up a bit though,  actually met Mr. Adamu's eyes and quietly asked, "Um..Would she?" Mr. Adamu teased mildly, "I couldn't say for sure...." He began laughing at the obvious dismay on Carmy's face, "I'm sorry, ha ha! I couldn't say for sure, but Hélène considered anyone who loved her daughter a dear friend." 

A happily awkward pause stretched on as Ali Farka Toure and Ry Cooder's Soukora began to play. Mr. Adamu made an obviously bogus claim that he forgot to buy toothpaste before coming home, and excused himself, saying he was heading down to the corner store to pick up a few things, leaving Syd and Carmy to clear the dishes. As the music swept through the apartment, neither of them knew what the lyrics meant, but Carmy could swear that his heart stopped. 

Ali Farka Toure sang on, 

"My love it is night now, 

Wait for me my love.

I love you. 

And I love the night. 

I like it when it is peaceful at night, 

Wait for me my love,

it is night now. 

Just wait for me my darling." 

Their eyes were locked on each other's faces, they sat stock still during the length of the song, and during the instrumental crescendo Carmy felt as if someone clamped a vise around his heart and SQUEEZED. He didn't know it at the time, but in that moment Syd felt the exact same way. When the song ended Syd awkwardly cleared her throat as Kassav's Wep came on and she began collecting plates and utensils, Carmy stood to help her and they brought the items to the kitchen sink in silence. Syd rinsed them under the tap water and Carmy loaded them into the dishwasher. 

They hadn't yet made eye contact since they'd left the table, and the playlist shuffled to The Meter's Love Is For Me. Carmy finally turned and met Syd's eyes, "Syd..thank you for everything tonight, I needed it." Sydney's eyes were soft, and her voice was even softer, "No problem Carmy, it was my pleasure." They looked at each other for a long moment and drifted closer together, until they were a hair's breadth apart, and they eyed each other's lips as the lead singer sang, 

"I believe everything about you baby!" 

- and the band replied, 

"I believe!

I believe!

I believe!

I believe!

I believe!

I believe!

I believe!" 

And at that moment, of all times, Mr. Adamu walked into the living room. The spell was comprehensively broken. Carmy was as red as a cherry and he and Syd practically leapt apart as if someone had dashed a bucket of cold water over them.

"Don't let me stop you two." Mr. Adamu smiled. "Of course Syd's Dad would say something like that!" Carmy thought to himself as he and Syd began sputtering and wheezing out in nervous brays of laughter. Carmen ran his hand through his hair and looked between Syd and Mr. Adamu before he said, "Um, I should get going...Thanks a lot for tonight Syd, thanks for having me Mr. Adamu." He shook hands with Mr. Adamu, grabbed his jacket, put back on his shoes, and left. 

"You're not gonna see him off downstairs? Did you get to kiss him?" Syd's Dad asked 'innocently'. "DAD!" Syd felt like an idiot as the first notes of The Funkees' Now I'm A Man began drifting from the stereo. She turned to the kitchen sink and hoped her father didn't see her tearing up in her disappointment. She felt so stupid, after all the denial it had finally hit her like a ton of bricks, of course she loved Carmy. Who else would she love? Her father remained standing where he was, but he didn't give up easily this time, unlike in times past. He pushed, "Sydney baby, I want you to be honest with me, but most importantly, I want you to be honest with yourself. That man who just left is your best friend, right?" 

"Yes, Dad." Syd weakly replied, she was sniffling a little. "Do you at least know he's your husband?" Sydney wheeled on her father, "Dad, please! I don't wanna talk about this right now- I haven't. We haven't-! Nobody's even brought that up! He hasn't even told me he likes me, fuck!" 

"Watch your language, baby." Her father still had the audacity to be smiling, she hastily apologized and fought back the fierce urge to roll her eyes so strongly that they'd be mistaken for centrifuges. "Alright Sydney, I'll leave you alone, but I didn't bring that up because of anything Carmy did or did not say, you told me what time it is...You brought out your Mom, and had The Meters on and your baby pictures out, what else should I think?" Syd huffed and her father drew closer to her and swiped away her tears with his thumbs. "It'll all work out baby, don't worry. He loves you." Her father kissed her on the cheek and left the kitchen to go wash up before bed. He left Syd standing in a daze, and she gripped the edge of the kitchen sink as Daisy Voisin's grainy voice sang Alegría Alegría. 

The next day, Carmy studied Syd's face more closely than he'd ever paid attention to anything, hoping to see in her eyes any flicker of recall of the night before and the 'almost-kiss' they'd shared. Syd was a tough cookie to crack though, she acted like her usual self, although there was a tinge of stiffness to her usual pep and she seemed to avoid his eyes. Carmen was feeling down right miserable, he'd hardly slept when he went home, and he was at risk of gnawing on the pots with the way the urge to get some time alone with Syd, and the need to talk to her, was affecting him. 

Therefore it came as a surprise when his phone lit up just before family was served. He was alone in the office at the time, "Hi, Mr. Adamu- how are you?" He was on pins and needles already, the man had almost caught Carmy necking with his daughter, in his own kitchen, he could not feel more embarrassed if he tried. "I'm good Carmy, but would you mind if I saw you for a few minutes? I'm in the area, and I promise it won't take long." Anxiety was clawing at Carmy's throat, he had a good idea what this meeting would be about, but he still spoke up and said, "Uh, sure." Mr. Adamu told him where they would meet up, a small cafe that wasn't too far away, and Carmy found Syd and asked her, "Can you hold down the fort for me, Chef? There's something I need to do for a bit." 

"Sure, no problem Chef. Be careful out there, don't talk to strangers." She was gonna be the death of him, she'd given him a small smile as she said it, and he felt as if he was a starving man who'd just finally been given a proper meal. He smiled back at her, at her little comment, and left before he could chicken out of the appointment with her father. When he arrived at the café, Mr. Adamu was already sitting and waiting, browsing a newspaper. He took a seat across from Mr. Adamu in the booth, and nervously flexed his fingers beneath the table, "Hi, Mr. Adamu." Syd's Dad held up his hand palm-forward, "Hey Carmy, please, all my friends call me Manuel, please, call me Manuel." 

Carmy seemed taken aback, "Really?" Manuel laughed at Carmy's nonplussed expression and he chuckled as he spoke, "No, not really. My friends call me Elroy, but you can call me Manuel for now." This managed to draw a smile out of Carmy and he seemed a little less jumpy. "So.." Sydney's Dad continued, "You're a bright young man, you know what this conversation's gonna be about." Carmy replied, "Yes, Sir, um, I mean, yes Manuel, I think so." Carmy actually blushed and chuckled a bit. "Well, don't worry, I won't threaten to kill you okay? Sydney could manage it if she ever needs to." Carmy and Manuel both started snickering at the Dad joke, the ice finally broken. Manuel ordered a coffee from the waitress and asked if Carmy wanted anything, his treat? Carmen thanked him and politely declined, he was still so nervous he wasn't so sure he could keep anything down. "All I've asked you here for is to find out one thing, I know who you are to Sydney already, but who do you want to be for her?" Something about the way her father asked his question, not giving the stereotypical, "What are your plans for my daughter?”-spiel , warmed Carmy's heart. 

His eyes were wet in an instant and he blinked, her Dad knew he loved her already, didn't he? He ran his hand through his hair, and had on a pained expression on his face before he brought his hand down to touch his fingertips to just below his mouth and almost whispered, "I want to be someone she can trust..I want to be her husband." He looked at Manuel earnestly and added on, "I'd like to be your son-in-law." Manuel nodded and said, "Good. Good.." and then he went in for the kill while he shrugged and smiled, "Okay? Well do something about it." Carmy started cackling immediately. He thought to himself, "God! Between the ribbing sense of humour, and the forthrightness, Syd really is her Dad's mini-me." 

An earlier conversation with Syd that seemed ages ago echoed in his mind, 

"I, uh, don't wanna be shitty.." 

"Okay. So don't be." 

Carmy was surprised to find himself actually enjoying the conversation, but he tried to explain himself a little, "Uhh. I would love to, but I-I don't exactly know how to go about that..And I don’t want to hurt her.." Manuel looked as if he was waiting for Carmy to go on, so he did, "Um, growing up..I always thought that my family, t-that my family and I were things to spare- to spare the people that I liked from...not welcome them into. And-uh, shit, I've never had a serious relationship before..." Syd's Dad noticed the way Carmy's hands were twitching above the tabletop now, Carmy realized and began to self-consciously clasp his hands together, feeling like a green fool. Mr. Adamu hadn't stopped smiling at him, but his expression softened at Carmy's disclosure and his blatant discomfort. He sighed, "I understand son, I really do. And maybe someday we'll look back at this and laugh when I tell you about Sydney's mother and what falling for her felt like...But for now- for now all I want you to know is life's too short to worry too much about some things okay, you know what I mean?" 

Mr. Adamu had unconsciously began to gently massage his own, now bare, ring-finger with the thumb and forefinger of his right hand. Carmy glanced down and nodded his understanding, clearly some absences were never filled, and time did not heal all wounds. Manuel sighed and broke the silence, "It's time for me to go, but let me just say this is the only hint I'll give you- she really likes you." Carmy smiled at that and Mr. Adamu laughed at the blush that slowly spread across his face, he was so transparent, no wonder his daughter enjoyed teasing him. He stood and wished Carmen good luck while folding his newspaper and Carmen stood and shook hands with him as they said their goodbyes. After Mr. Adamu had left though, Carmy needed to sit for a few minutes and gather his thoughts. He ordered a donut to go because he was sure he'd make it back to The Bear when family was over. He had so much to say to Syd, and no fucking clue how to say it. He suddenly remembered Syd nervously stammering about her mother's music collection in an effort to make him feel better, and he smiled to himself. Well, no pain, no gain - for her he had no choice but to figure things out. 

That night, as he drove Syd home, they were both so uncharacteristically quiet he was sure that there were graveyards that were more sonorous than the way they were acting. He absolutely hated it, and she did too, but he only broke the crypt-like silence when they'd arrived safely to her place, and as Syd was about to say her thanks before cracking open the car door to leave. "Syd...Can I talk with you for a sec?" Carmy pleaded. He was white-knuckling the steering wheel, and Syd was just as nervous as he looked, although she hid it better, so she smiled and said yes. And though the words were difficult at first, in the end they'd talked, and talked, and talked, and talked* until Carmy traipsed slowly alongside her and walked her to her door, they bumped shoulders the entire walk. They kissed each other goodnight, although it was really already 1:26 in the morning. As Syd closed the door and began shrugging off her belongings, she bumped into the small table in the hall. "Baby?" her Dad called to her from behind his bedroom door. "Sorry Dad," she replied, before giddily blurting out, "Carmy asked me out." 

"That's nice baby, you two have fun." 

"I never said I told him yes." Syd squeaked out. 

"Uh-huh, whatever you say, baby. I love you, goodnight now, you hear?" 

"I love you too Daddy, goodnight." 

Syd and her Dad both heard the amusement in each other's voices, and their eyes shone, just like their smiles.

Notes:

English translation of Soukora's lyrics found here:

https://chocolatnegro.wordpress.com/2012/05/27/soukora-talking-timbuktu/

*had their first kiss

[unluckycactus]

Hello! I hope you are well! Excuse me for asking, i want to ask whether you have a social media other than twitter?

I am one of the readers for the team 1 shenigans fics, (which are really FUCKING AWESOME, I love Yolo be Carefolo to the ✨bits✨. Seeing the team members be menaces with heniroksoo are so fun. I have always been imagining them as gremlins, im glad to see it when i found your fic. Thank you for writing it ≧∇≦), reading the newest chapter of Acquaint Fate, (I.LOVE.THIS.FICCCCCCCCCCC), and meeting Cha Yuha, im reminded to this one post illustrating a headcanon of heniroksoo adopting lots of kids who are actually the alternate version of lcf's characters who had passed. Like olliene and tasha.

I wonder if it was author-nim or im just imagining it or maybe it was another heniroksoo author im following.

Other than that, THANK YOU FOR BRINGING THESE GEMS TO THE WORLD!!! LOVE YAHHH

(I was so happy when team 1 members cameo-ed in Acquaint Fate (≧∇≦). I will bet that Cha Yuha is olliene reincarnated or alternate self)

Hi! I am, ty 💗

Um, aside from twitter I have an insta (same handle as Twitter)! but that place is just me dumping merch photos and art too. So, it's like my twt but a bit more organized tbh

For fic content I'm mostly trying to do it here, but I'm still a bit shy shsjdh

OOO, HELP. I wasn't expecting a reader from that fic‼️

To answer your question, no it wasn't me! I wish i could help you find the author, but I haven't seen that post either 😭

Aa but tysm for enjoying my fics, fr.

Coughs, um, well. About Yuha--- he isn't Olliene, sorry.

If you are interested in his story, the fic that tells how HeniRoksoo adopted his Team 1 members plus their stories is this one (Cha Yuh arc is supposed to go next) is this one below

YOLO be Carefolo is basically a side fic of this one in which I dump the random moments/anecdotes of Team 1, but this fic is like, the actual timeline!

Hope that helps! And also thanks for asking, I don't mind answering questions!

[suffarustuffaru]

✨

Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

AA this is the last fic writer ask question fr :o again it took me a while to get to all of them pfft but i appreciate them a lot!! this question especially is really sweet wkdndn but yes!! and hope anyone reading my answers to these questions found it interesting at least pfft

hmm…. compliment….. im a MAJOR stickler for detail :O i literally cant turn my brain off i have to get EVERY detail i can right whenever possible wjdnd. not that im always right bc im very much not but i try very hard to be!! and i absolutely adore trying to put a lot of detail and nuance into things in my work esp since i focus on characters mental thought process so much hah. i try very hard to do a lot (or at least i consider it a lot widjdj) of research :o for example i wanted to write astrea fic so i devoured every heinkel and reinhard related side story possible and now they give me intense brainrot. cries. since i write a lot of character study i HAVE to look at everything possible before i finish a fic or ill cry inside if i miss one (1) detail i couldve taken into account hah. so i do think im a hard working writer :o !! analyzing things for fun especially when i admire a work of fiction runs in my blood wjdnd it just Happens. i try my best!!

as for um. that one crack treated seriously gluttony if fic i did once (selfcest…). is it accurate to who gluttonybaru is as a character? no in the sense that hes written purposefully in that fic to be like. pushed to his Most Extreme. but also i did try to at least be kind of accurate bc. i combed through SO MUCH of arc 6 and the gluttony if to write him fr 😭😭 there was TOO MUCH analysis in that fic thats why its got a novel length wordcount HAH. hes always had a hate love relationship with “natsuki subaru”….

uhhh uhhh oh yeah something else vaguely related to this that just came to mind—for example my multichap pride otto fic has me like really wracking my brain bc pride otto has screentime for exactly 0.2 seconds (im totally good at math) so its like. i wanted to like analyze how he most likely thinks and what sort of behaviors he has and how hed even react in All the new shenanigans im putting him in. but im also working off of 0.2 seconds of screentime so i had to also go and look at how main otto thinks and try to make Many Educated Guesses on how otto goes from point a (main otto pre-meeting subaru) to point b (the otto we see in pride if). which is something i do every time i focus on an if character in general anyway HAH bc i think it gets easier to understand if versions of characters, no matter how different they seem from their main route selves, once you examine who their base character is and THEN you look at the if events and how its warped them away from their base character. if that makes sense. i think its really fun hah.

i also recognize though that it wouldve been maybe Easier to make pride otto in my fic a little more. dead inside. empty. bc i know that ive been writing a lot of his anger and irritation hah. and it wouldve made sense for him to be a little more tired kind of dead inside in his internal dialogue!!! but i figured that i might as well go a little differently with it to yes maybe subvert expectations a little bit (and bc. ok after arc 8 Confirming Many Things About Otto, no way pride otto wasnt angry at some point. fr.) but also bc. you know when a person whos been in a traumatic situation they couldnt escape for so long is forced to change themselves to survive? if that person manages to finally escape its like. now they gotta try and unlearn any trauma related lessons theyve learned now that the danger is over bc what helped them survive is now maladaptive bc the danger is Over. thats kind of how i approached the fic fr T^T but also i try so hard to write pride otto as the jaded ass he definitely is. theres so much jades in him for sure. (this sentence totally makes sense.)

oh!!! uh uh one small detail with pride otto—when characters have titles, he will almost Always call them by their title in both internal and external dialogue. reinhard is sword saint and julius is the greatest/finest knight and felix is blue, etc etc. otto is well. 1. emotionally constipated 2. distant from others 3. Going Out of His Way to distance himself from others 4. hes very fixated on power and hierarchy and 5. he is Very aware of the role hes played in crushing each knight in the knight trio. main otto Absolutely feels guilt even as hes being ruthless. i figured pride otto likely at least Used to feel guilty. if hes not still guilty deep down.

[acustardduckling]

I got tagged to do one of those memey things by @emeraldhazeart​ ! I’m going to break the rules and not tag anyone myself but if you’d like to do it, you can say I ‘tagged’ you. its cool!!!

The Rules: Tag (9) people you want to know better and/or catch up with, then answer the following:

Four Ships

oh boy I’m not really a shippy person either ... BUT.

QueenRune

What can I say about these two that I haven’t already?? It doesn’t matter whether it’s the regular universe, or the splatoon universe, or whatever other universe might happen in a fic, I really like these two as a pairing when I’m not paring Alarune with myself

I didn’t go into their initial interactions thinking they’d be a couple, but it helped me discover a lot of things about what I wanted out of Queenie’s character - as well as some things about myself. When authors say that characters ‘have a mind of their own’, it really came into play here.

Alarune also just. Really needed to be loved. While Queenie hasn’t experienced quite the same level of distress, I like to think she understands the place her partner is coming from, and why Alarune behaves the way she does... 

Queenie likes to lump on praise, even though she knows it isn’t always ‘deserved’, but she wants other people to see and appreciate the effort Alarune makes, even if that “people” happens to be Alarune herself - letting her know that she knows how much she tries - 

UM. ANYWAY. OTHER SHPS. I have lots of OC ships like Nightmare/Evian and Pansy/Groa but I’m going to try and think of some media based ones so people have an idea of the dynamics I like (I guess???)  It’s embarrassing bc I have way, way more notps than otps.

Player x Partner in Mystery Dungeon (Particularly Rescue / Explorers / Gates)

Is this a cop-out answer? Am I going to get called names for this one?

I know the whole thing is framed as a really strong friendship, but the absolute devotion the partner has for the player is really sweet. It doesn’t help that they ALWAYS have a moment where the player character “has to go” and you see how absolutely distraught the partner is at seeing them turn into little lights and be erased from existence. It’s okay, though, because they always come back.

They’re an inseparable team, so maybe they can also kiss, as a treat.

Don’t get me wrong, though, I don’t always do ‘shippy’ playthroughs of my PMD games. Sometimes I really am just content with them being friends, you know? But other times it’s just REALLY easy to give them OC names to fill the roles. 

Maki x Kaito (From Danganronpa V3)

This game has an absolutely ridiculous ending, like DR2, but I think these two are really sweet together. Elaborating would kind of spoil some of the plot, but basically he’s a motivational goof and she’s stone cold and they both have something to hide.

Wall-E x Eve

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?????A aaa?A??a?a?a? saaaaAAAAa?a??aa?a? ?a?a?a?aaaa/a//a  THE ROBOTS ARE IN LOVE??!?!?111 A AB  THE SENE AT THE END??? THE HANDHOLDING???  DIRECTIVE??? THIS IS MASTERPIECE ROMANCE CINEMA YOU CANNOT TOP THIS

-

AHEM anyway there are other questions:

Last Song: U Sure Do - Strike , embarrassingly enough.

Currently Reading: I really wish I did more reading. The last book I read was Legends & Lattes by Travis Baldree, which I really enjoyed (And read in one sitting on the plane). It’s high fantasy with a literal coffee shop AU setting. Its ... soft. Oh, and that has a naturally progressing romance between two of the main girls - another ship that I like! Yay!

Last Movie: I’m going to see the new Mario movie this weekend, but the last thing I watched was The Brave Little Toaster, and for the first time. It was a trip, but I still enjoyed watching it.

Craving: I have a sore throat and could really go for some icecream right now :(

[pesterloglog]

Equius Zahhak, Aradia Megido

Act 5, page 2278-2281

centaursTesticle [CT] began trolling apocalypseArisen [AA]

CT: D --> Aradia, here's the deal

CT: D --> Now that the game has begun, the plan will be modified slightly

CT: D --> We will not be co-leaders of the b100 team

CT: D --> I alone will be the leader

CT: D --> Is that understood

AA: thats fine

CT: D --> Good

CT: D --> Wait

CT: D --> You have no objection

CT: D --> Are you sure

AA: n0

AA: im 0k with it

CT: D --> Do you typically embrace such a passive attitude when your superiors give you orders

AA: i d0nt usually receive 0rders fr0m superi0rs 0r 0therwise

AA: but really its fine

CT: D --> Hmm

AA: what

CT: D --> I think I should get a towel

CT: D --> I'm perspiring heavily again

AA: why

AA: whats wr0ng

CT: D --> Never mind

CT: D --> I'm trying to stay professional about this

AA: ab0ut what

AA: what are y0u talking ab0ut

CT: D --> Forget it

CT: D --> It's just pleasant to consort with one of lesser breeding who clearly understands her place

AA: ive underst00d f0r s0me time that this will be my r0le

AA: t0 functi0n as y0ur server player

AA: and that y0u w0uld be the team leader as the first in the chain

CT: D --> Perfect

CT: D --> Then we are on the same page

CT: D --> I 100k forward to seeing how well you serve me, server player

AA: uh

AA: thats n0t quite the meaning 0f the w0rd server

CT: D --> What do you mean

AA: as y0ur server i manipulate y0ur envir0nment t0 help y0u advance

CT: D --> I don't understand

CT: D --> Are you

CT: D --> Are you saying

CT: D --> That

CT: D --> You are in a position of control over me

AA: i supp0se s0

CT: D --> Oh

AA: what

CT: D --> Oh my God

AA: 0_0

CT: D --> This is

CT: D --> Impropriety of a caliber I cannot even

CT: D --> It's

CT: D --> You are as low on the hemosprectrum as possible

CT: D --> To consider that someone so low could be in a position of authority over me is

CT: D --> It's just so

CT: D --> Disgusting

AA: y0u really are quite a sn0b

CT: D --> No it's

CT: D --> FILTHY

AA: 0_0

CT: D --> I need some air

CT: D --> Or some cold milk

CT: D --> Or a towel, I need a towel

CT: D --> Where the fuck are all my fresh towels

CT: D --> I mean

CT: D --> Fiddlesticks, please pardon my language

CT: D --> It won't happen again

AA: y0u l00k really agitated

AA: are y0u sure y0ure alright

CT: D --> I'm fine

CT: D --> I'll be fine

CT: D --> I just need to breathe

CT: D --> And to break something possibly

AA: break s0mething

CT: D --> Yes

CT: D --> It helps me rela%

AA: 0h

AA: i think i understand

CT: D --> Do you

AA: i like breaking things

AA: i didnt used t0 but n0w i d0

AA: its fun

AA: um

AA: hell0

AA: are y0u sure y0ure 0k

CT: D --> Yes

AA: y0u really d0 l00k like y0ure sweating pretty hard

CT: D --> I just need a blasted towel

CT: D --> Where ever did that Aurthour get off to

AA: maybe y0u sh0uld break s0mething

AA: t0 try t0 calm d0wn

CT: D --> Perhaps

AA: d0 y0u want me t0 break s0mething

CT: D --> Whoa what

AA: i c0uld break s0mething if y0u want

CT: D --> Do you

CT: D --> Want to break something

AA: kind 0f

CT: D --> I, uh

CT: D --> Ok

AA: equius im ab0ut t0 thr0w an abluti0n trap thr0ugh y0ur wall

AA: heads up

CT: D --> Yes

CT: D --> Yes that was wonderful

AA: it was pretty c00l

CT: D --> But could you please refrain from dipping into the vernacular of commoners

CT: D --> In fact, this is an order from your leader

CT: D --> Call things by their proper names

AA: what

AA: y0u want me t0 call it a bath tub

AA: that s0unds ridicul0us

CT: D --> Nevertheless, do it

AA: fine

CT: D --> Now

CT: D --> Could you please

CT: D --> Uh

CT: D --> Do that again

AA: what

AA: y0u want me t0 thr0w the trap thr0ugh y0ur wall again

AA: i mean the tub

CT: D --> Yes

AA: is that an 0rder

CT: D --> Yes

CT: D --> Wait

CT: D --> I don't know

AA: what d0nt y0u kn0w

CT: D --> Maybe I don't want to order you to

CT: D --> Maybe I want

CT: D --> You to do whatever things that you want to do

AA: i really have n0 idea what y0ure talking ab0ut

CT: D --> You could cause quite a bother for me, with the power you wield

CT: D --> I can do nothing to stop you, peasant girl

CT: D --> It's so magnificently depraved

AA: y0u are s0 weird

AA: and this is c0ming fr0m a gh0st

AA: ribbit

CT: D --> What was that

CT: D --> Are you role playing now

CT: D --> Stop, it's unbecoming

AA: s0rry

CT: D --> You're better than that

CT: D --> And by better, I mean worse

CT: D --> Much, much worse

CT: D --> Downright coarse and degenerate

CT: D --> Just reprehensibly sordid

AA: 0_0

CT: D --> Actually

CT: D --> Yes

CT: D --> You may role play and proceed to deepen this already irretrievable debauchery

CT: D --> In fact I command it

CT: D --> I command you to have free will and do as you please

CT: D --> And continue being bothersome and unpredictably destructive

CT: D --> I mean

CT: D --> If you want

AA: im n0t really r0le playing

AA: im part fr0g

AA: but 0k

AA: i guess i can break s0me m0re stuff

AA: ribbit

CT: D --> Yes

CT: D --> Ribbit again

AA: i cant really c0ntr0l the ribbits

CT: D --> I will make haste through this mysterious realm and find your gate

CT: D --> It will pose no challenge for me at all

AA: yeah i kn0w

CT: D --> I will then give you your new body, and you may take your rightful place as my subordinate

AA: sure

CT: D --> Actually

CT: D --> Now I'm beginning to wonder

AA: what

CT: D --> Whether I want you to be my subordinate

CT: D --> Hmm

CT: D --> I hope this doesn't sound too strange

AA: everything y0u say s0unds strange

CT: D --> Maybe I would like you to be the co-leader again

AA: 0k

CT: D --> In fact

CT: D --> Oh my goodness, I can't believe I'm entertaining this thought

CT: D --> It feels just vile

CT: D --> Try not to roll your eyes at me

AA: i d0nt have pupils

CT: D --> Would you mind terribly

CT: D --> Being the leader

AA: fine

CT: D --> But

CT: D --> Don't tell anyone

CT: D --> You will be the leader of me, and I will lead all else

CT: D --> You would in effect be the secret leader

AA: yeah sure

AA: thats pretty much h0w it is anyway

CT: D --> Yes, that's the spirit

CT: D --> You take to authority well for one of your b100d

AA: i d0nt have bl00d

CT: D --> Not yet

CT: D --> But soon your heart will beat anew, and through it, fresh b100d and fresh passion

AA: 0_0

AA: w0w uh

AA: can y0u just bring me the r0b0t already

CT: D --> On my way

centaursTesticle [CT] ceased trolling apocalypseArisen [AA]

AA: ribbit

[dreamsy990]

You reblorbed the "Chose Violence" ask game post & now I must return the favour:

1 12 14 21

Don't feel pressured to answer all of them - it's all in good fun!

~athena-appreciation-page

ALRIGHTY (so sorry this took so long to get around to)

1: the character everyone gets wrong

alright im setting aside my default knee-jerk response of pHOENIX WRIGHT because im literally only referring to his relationship with apollo and i talk too much about that anyways. so i present to you: LARRY BUTZ!!!

i think he was pretty good in the first game, and AMAZING in the anime. like, all his scenes are so fun. hell, even in the movie, he's a fucking HIGHLIGHT!!!! i think the fandom (and the later games, to a lesser extent) kind of does him dirty by portraying him as, idk, terminally straight but in a really bad way? im too tired to think of the word im looking for.

12: the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

i like lucas miller hm i mean. i like most characters. i see a lot of hate for sunny from wof. like, people think shes annoying and kind of useless? but idk, i like her!! she reminds me a bit of athena, i think? in terms of personality, not story.

i get that people are frustrated that she doesn't do much for the first 4 books, but she's trying to be useful. iirc she has a similar arc to maya at the end of aa1 where she feels useless so she starts doing extreme things to help out and ends up being the reason the main cast succeeds. i love that for her!! also, she's pretty fun as a side character in the second arc. so, sunny probably.

14: that one thing you see in fics all the time

dadnix (specifically relating to apollo). i have SO MANY ISSUES WITH DADNIX!!!!! you CANNOT tell me that apollo would consider this man a father. hell, even assuming apollo would think of a parental figure positively (which, based on his story, he has no reason to have ANY positive association with fathers specifically), phoenix???? their relationship doesn't read like that at ALL. apollo is notably distant with phoenix. nick is SHOCKED to hear apollo isn't always serious.

the only canon scene i can think of that reads like dadnix is probably when the agency is in danger in magical turnabout, when apollo has what reads like a panic attack, and nick comforts him. that's the ONLY SCENE. i just. i want them to have a conversation i think. i dont see their dynamic like that i suppose. its fine? i just. hngh.

21: part of canon you think is overhyped

i was gonna say apollos backstory but uh. actually i think its very interesting. um. i cant think of anything actually. so a part of canon i think is UNDERHYPED is the gap between aa4 and aa5!! like, some shit CLEARLY happened there!!!!! phoenix and apollo had to have a conversation between aa4 and aa5 based on how their relationship is different (change in writers be damned) and that's one of my favorite things in aa so. yeah!!

okay actually. i can think of a non-ace attorney answer. pre-starblaster in taz. i just dont really care all that much about what happened before the hunger? like i don't mind it, its pretty interesting, but its probably the LEAST interesting thing in taz.

[arcaneroses]

Tighnari x Gn!Reader

The forests love letter

Sypnosis: You find a anymous letter addressed to you, and your heart-throb of a superior Tighnari who usually knows everything seems to be acting very suspicious about said letter...

You stare at the letter addressed to you, the damn bird had delivered it to you this morning. You don't usually get letters from anyone other than your fellow forest rangers, and even that was few and a far between. Odd.

Even more odd was the contents of the letter, it had been written with such care but you could see that the writer had a bit of a shaky and at times too strong of a grip when writing to you.

There was a pressed flower inside, a beatiful lotus that could be found in most nearby rivers but this one had a unusual coloring. It was pressed in the spot where someone would usually sign their letter.

Tighnari would love this, I have to show him. You thought when looking at the flower.

The letter. It was a request, to meet in the dead of night near the Statue of the Seven. The writer had written that they had something to tell you, though you couldn't really understand what exactly.

Why was this so mysterious? You had a hard time wrapping your head around it. You needed more opinions.

"Collei!" You call out to your friend, the young girl looks over at you and hurries over when you invite her over. "What's up Y/n?" Collei asked with a chipper tone, you were glad the younger trainee was seemingly better today.

Tighnari and all the forest rangers, you included, were always worried about the girls illness. "I got this letter, but it's..Arg, see for yourself."

“O-okay? Let's see.."

Collei scoots closer, craning her neck a little to try to get a glimpse of the handwriting.

"Wow this is really pretty, I wish I had the skill to make something like this." The green-haired girl gasps, "Um, the message is kind of vague though. I would think twice before-..Wait! I recognize this writing style." Collei's eyes widen in realization.

"You do?! Who is it?"

"Aa!" Collei yelps, embarrassment coloring her cheeks. "Uh! No one! I-I saw wrong, whats that? I'm being called to a super urgent task that need to be done NOW?" Collei starts backing away, smiling like crazy.

"Sorry Y/n, I have to go. But it seems like you just have to face this head on, you got this!" Collei waves goodbye before fleeing the scene. Leaving you utterly and completely dumbfounded.

"Okay, that was also, very weird." You said to yourself.

Maybe if Collei couldn't help, Tighnari could. Your boss was always very knowledgeable when it came to..pretty much everything. He would know...

"I don't have any idea what that is about." Tighnari concluded after only a short look at the letter. "What!? But Tighnari you have to know, you're my last hope!" You wailed, helplessly throwing your arms in the air. To show how much in distress you were.

"Y/n, I am honored you think so highly of me to come ask for..advice. But my area of expertise lies in botany and the rainforest, not some..letter." Tighnari’s sighed and his ears twitched.

"Did you ask anyone else?" Tighnari inquired and turned around to start sorting his shelves of stuff. Leaving you to look at his back and pretty tail.

"I did ask Collei, but she just told me that 'You have to face this head on! You got his!" You told him, basically kicking rocks in your mind.

"Well, do that then. Figure out what you want to do about it and do it. There really isn't much more to it." You could feel Tighnari’s eyes rolling at you, like they often times would.

"Hm, okay. Maybe you're right.." You hum, taking your friends advice and trying to think things through.

Tighnari takes the chance to get a quick sideways glance to where you stand and rub at your chin thoughtfully.

There’s a crease in between your eyebrows; maybe you're confused again. In Tighnari’s stomach, a weird tumbling, giddy feeling is lurching around.

"Uhm..I, hm..." You mumble deep in thought. Tighnari smiles a little helplessly at you. The forest watcher honestly thinks you look so fucking hot and somehow adorable right at that moment.

"Whoever it is, I suppose I have to meet them. It seems urgent..right?" You finally come to a conclusion,

"Oh! Ah, yes. It does seem..urgent. You should definitely meet them, if that is what you want Y/n." Tighnari nods affirmative, you note that he seemed to have been also deep in thought.

“What do you think they want to ask you?” Tighnari asks. And that gets your attention immediately.

Determined, he sits up and grabs you by the wrist. Your skin tingling at the contact Tighnari’s slender and warm fingers.(does the dude use handlotion??) “Do you think they want to be your..partner?”

"I, I don't know, probably not? Haha, who would want that from me?" Your words stumble out nervously, you hope that he couldn’t feel your quickening heart.

"Y/n anyone would be so lucky to have you." He looks into your eyes with such determination of something deep, something you couldn't understand. He brings himself closer until the two of you are now facing each other. You can feel his breath on your face.

Then, suddenly Tighnari pulls away. Letting go of your hand, "I-..Hopefully whatever you find will be satisfying for you. Y/n."

And so you wait, you watch as the sun sets on the horizon and the moon takes it's place.

You walk along the grassy path, steering clear of the lurking shadows of night and staying in the light that the moon provided. Until you reach you destination.

"Hi Tighnari." Your smile reaches your ears, "This wasn't a surprise, was it?" Tighnari scratches the back of his ear sheepishly.

"Not after today, no." You laugh softly, "After what you said, I started thinking. I do hope that the stranger that invited me here to be my partner." You step close to him, he has shed out of his day wear.

Now only wearing a light purple nightgown that seems too light for the cool breeze running through the forest at night.

He looks so beautiful, the moon crowning his head. The soft intricate patterned clothing, making him seem so much more vulnerable than you have ever seen him.

"And it's because I want that stranger to be my partner." You let out a satisfied sigh. Both of you suddenly feeling very warm despite the previous breeze.

"That stranger is if you'll have him."

[oekaki-chan]

hi clef!! i first stumbled upon your art on twitter via a comic tutorial you posted. i finally decided play AA a month ago and remembered about your art and thankfully found your account again. After also finding your tumblr,, its just. wow. going through people's art tags is always a journey, especially when theres stuff in it that are older than a decade, haha. i just wanna say that your improvement over time motivates me to keep drawing, as ive been recently studying forms and shapes in other people's art, and yours is definitely one of the best examples. As im taking a gap year to work on a portfolio for college, i finally had the proper opportunity to start studying art as i wanted.

i mainly wanted to ask- when drawing, what types of references do you use for character poses? they always seem really natural but also have that "homemade feeling"- as in applied really well into an art style. The way you draw expressions is also really immaculate! I was wondering (if its alright with you), whether if you have tips on that too?

thank you regardless, and i hope you have a great day!

I hope this doesn't come off as bragging because honestly when I'm drawing poses I almost never use references 😭💦 During my art journey I conditioned myself to draw without references because my parents didn't allow me to have internet access until I went to high school, it was hard to get references for drawing so it was mostly just "frick around and see what happens", I just tried to project whatever I have in mind into the canvas 😂 Instead of training my eyeballing skill, I ended up training my muscle memory and the way I imagine poses in my head (that's why I'm a bit bad with realism drawing because I have bad eyeballing and real-time observation skills).

I do use references sometimes when the pose is a bit hard to get because it has many foreshortenings and hidden parts like this Diavolo doodle I made, but I studied the reference instead of tracing it so I can get a better gist of how things work in case I'll need to draw the same pose again in the future. (Also I hate that whenever I try to find some references for a specific pose google suggested me porn sites instead zzzz)

But I'm not saying using references is wrong, not at all 😭!! It's just my way of drawing! I'm lazy and get distracted easily once I'm scrolling the internet pages, it's also why I don't usually use 3D models in CSP because trying to get the right pose with that may take a while and the outcome isn't really worth the time because it often looks stiff, weightless, and unnatural.

And same goes for expressions! I think being a (somewhat) avid manga reader extends my visual library for expression (and um, I think drawing steamy stuff helps too because you can practice drawing exaggerated expressions and poses, just make sure you're not drawing the same type of expression and pose/angle over and over 😳💦)

I hope this helps and I'm sorry it got a bit long 😭😭!!

[deedadobee]

Hiya! Your writing is amazing and I wanted to ask if you could write about a well known supervillain interviewing a veterinarian civilian about the caretaking process of various deadly animals? I thought this might be a fun prompt to try

Domesticated Fangs

AAA!! such a fun and unique prompt!! i hope i make ya proud w this!! (also aa u flatter me) A/N: this is the longest prompt fill i wrote!! also did some research for it so i have a big brain now ENJOYY

The sun was setting as Civilian started locking up their office at the vet they worked at, it was a rather slow day in their opinion. All they treated today was a puppy whose owners were concerned by its belly only to find out it was just eating healthy. 

A bell chimed while they cleared up the magazines in the waiting lounge, they assumed it was the receptionist.

“How was the cig break?” Civilian asked as they fluffed the pillows.

“I don’t smoke, darling.” A velvety voice replied.

Civilian turned to see SuperVillain in their suit and mighty mask. Their heart lunged to their throat and froze in their place.

“Don’t worry, I don’t bite, just here to ask a professional like you some questions.” SuperVillain reassured them as they closed the door behind them.

“...How do you know that I’m a professional, maybe I’m not that skilled.”

“Ah, you are very humble,” SuperVillain started, “you were all over the news for your findings when you were in university, known for your outstanding graduation project, and many other things.” 

“That was… Years ago.” Civilian sighed.

“Still makes you a valid source for my questions.” SuperVillain sat in one of the chairs in the waiting room with their legs crossed ever so gracefully. 

Civilian was utterly confused, the all mighty SuperVillain could've gone to anyone but came to them instead. They wondered what serious questions roamed their masterful mind.

“Alright.. Um… What can I do for you?” Civilian left a chair between themselves and SuperVillain, awaiting the mystery of their presence to be answered.

“I have some inquiries about some animals I would like to adopt.” SuperVillain shined a pearly smile.

Was that it? They wanted to know about animals? Civilian was taken aback by the simplicity of SuperVillain’s request.

“Oh? I… Think I can help! Are you looking to adopt a cat or a dog?” 

“A retired hunting Harpy eagle is one of the animals I have set my eyes on,” SuperVillain answered, “I was wondering if you knew their qualities and what I should provide them with.”

Civilian’s eyes widened, “A Harpy? That’s a known fatal eagle, SuperVillain, I don’t think it would do as a house pet.”

“I reckon a retired eagle like him would be a lovely pet, don’t you think?” SuperVillian’s fangs showed as they spoke, making Civilian gulp.

“If you’re able to get them an enclosure with monkeys and snakes, then sure! They'd be perfect.” Civilian said sarcastically, only to find SuperVillain writing it down. Oh, they are serious about this.

“Alright! Now,” SuperVillain piped up enthusiastically, “How about a Nile Croc? What should I prepare?”

Civilian thought about it, “W-well, they need a wide space with fresh water, and proper heating… about 26°C… And a proper fence to keep them from climbing and-... Well, eating everyone.” 

SuperVillain was very focused, nodding as Civilian explained, making them feel warm inside, understood for the first time in years. Civilian thought their studies were useless up until now, it was paying off in the weirdest yet thoughtful way possible. It was Civilian’s turn to ask the question that has been bothering them.

“Out of all the people you could have asked, why me?” Civilian quietly asked.

“Darling, I already told you the reason,” SuperVillain looked up through their lashes as they kept writing, "you know your stuff from heart."

Civilian pursed their lips to keep them from smiling and played with the hem of their uniform, flattered.

“So… What other animals are you thinking of adopting?”

“Some lovely cobras, maybe piranhas, every deadly animal from the zoo, really.”

“So... you’re going to steal them?”

“On the contrary, dear, I plan to give them the proper care the zoo fails to give.”

Civilian hummed in surprise, “What sparked that idea?”

“Your thesis, on endangered animals and the dangers of them being in captivity.”

Cheeks flushed, Civilan’s eyes darted to the floor, “O-oh.”

“It was a rather inspiring paper, very detailed and,” the villain looks up to meet Civilan’s eyes ”beautifully written, might I add.” SuperVillain grinned at the red mess Civilian became.

“I-it isn't much…” Civilian stuttered out.

“It is, you poured your heart out on this cause.” SuperVillain tucks in their notepad and stands up, taking out an envelope.

“What’s that? It isn't filled with drugs that’ll knock me out, right?” Civilian nervously laughed.

SuperVillain chuckled and handed it to them.

“It’s for your time, I do apologise for coming in after hours, but I wish not to scare anyone away from your center.” 

“How kind of you… Thank you.” Civilian’s words were quiet and genuine, SuperVillain heard it as they walked to the door.

“No, thank you.” SuperVillain winked as they walked out and only the bell’s chimes filled the lobby. 

Civilian breathed out a breath they didn’t know they were holding, closed their eyes as they opened the envelope. They peeked from one eye to see a check and a card.

The check was written to them by an unfamiliar name with an insane amount of money, with the message ‘For your future research.’

Civilian’s eyes widened as they gasped, they read the card behind the check to see a phone number with a scribbled ‘call me ;)’.

[lossie92]

Anything else you can share about the sugar daddy au?

Hi there! Sorry it took me so damn long to answer, but for a while I didn't really have anything new to share from this fic 😶

However, I recently managed to write a little scene, so here you go. Hope you like it!

-

"Touka was right."

"Huh?" Tobirama blurted out before his mind caught up to his mouth. He didn't have time to correct himself as Madara spoke.

"Your cousin," he said, "she told me the truth."

Tobirama frowned. "Truth about what?"

"Hm, actually what she said wasn't exactly correct. An understatement, if you will," Madara responded with a smile. "She told me you're, and I quote, quite attractive, but in my opinion you're actually, well, breathtakingly beautiful. If you don't mind me saying so. I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable?"

For a moment Tobirama didn't know what to say. His whole face felt as if it was on fire. He was certain his cheeks were even redder now than before and he didn't know whether there was anything he could do to help with that highly unflattering image.

Not that Madara seemed to mind it.

Breathtakingly beautiful. 

Nobody has ever called him that before. 

Truth be told, Tobirama rarely ever thought about his looks. It used to bother him. The way he so obviously stood out not just amongst his own family, but his peers as well, was undeniable and he had spent a lot of time in his youth wishing he would fit in more.

Nowadays he rarely paid attention to his appearance, actively choosing to focus his attention on things he could actually influence or change about himself. The self-doubt lingered though and Tobirama couldn't say he had ever been able to move past those insecurities. 

In many ways, he supposed part of him would forever be a teenager teased for his weird hair, constantly sunburnt, liberally freckled skin, and thick, ugly glasses.

"I… I'm, um. Th-thank you?" He finally managed to stutter out. "And I'm not… It's not that I'm uncomfortable, not really." 

"You don't seem very comfortable either," Madara pointed out, his smile slipping. "I do apologise. I didn't mean—"

"There's no need for that, Madara-san," Tobirama cut in. "I'm just not used to it, is all."

Madara seemed puzzled by that. "Not used to what? Compliments?" When Tobirama nodded in lieu of a response, Madara scoffed and said, "Should we decide to move forward with this agreement, I'll have to rectify that. But even if we don't… The opinion of small-minded people who wouldn't be able to recognise true beauty even if it hit them in the face shouldn't influence the way you see yourself."

Tobirama flushed and averted his eyes. "Aa. I'll try to keep that in mind."

[ddarker-dreams]

Hi,

I'm asking you this 'cause you are one of my fav writers on this app and I'm too embarrassed to come off anon.

I used to be confident in my writing a year ago. The words used to flow into my head freely as I write and not even once I felt like it was a chore to me. I didn't doubt or fuss over stuff I write until one day I got criticized very badly. I received a huge feedback on how much my writing sucked (literally a page).

Now, every time I sit to write stuff i love, i fall into the pit hole of self doubts and start to loathe the style of my writing.

I know it sounds pathetic that one bad criticism has changed my mindset. And, writing stuff is my only outlet....

Today, I run a small blog on this app and so far the response for the stuff i write is so positive yet I can't shake away this insecurity and it is starting to take a toll on me.

How do I overcome this? I would appreciate any tips on getting better at writing and finding a unique writing style. Please ignore this ask if it makes you uncomfy tho. Again, I'm so sorry if I troubled you.

hello anon!!

aa… i'm really sorry to hear that this happened to you, unsolicited criticism can already be discouraging, but that sounds infinitely worse ?? i don't think you sound pathetic, it's pretty natural for people to remember negative experiences over positive ones. it just sticks in the brain longer. i'm a pretty sensitive person myself so i can see where you're coming from. i think one of the things that's helped me a lot is basically going 'so what lol' whenever i'm confronted with stuff like that. we're writing self-indulgent stories for fun (and free!), it doesn't need to be this generation's war and peace. it's okay for your work to be 'messy'. writing is like any other hobby, what matters more is enjoying the creating process rather than arriving at a super polished piece that's-100%-without-flaw-god-tier-ready-to-be-accepted-in-the-canon-of-the-bible level stuff. there's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting what you work on to be good, i absolutely strive for that myself, but when it feels more like a chore and i'm agonizing over it, i take a step back.

i didn't feel right giving you a watchmojo top ten tips to improve your writing reply in response to this. i was too busy going >:( at the thought of an absolute troglodyte thinking their silly one page of feedback that no one asked for was warranted. like. the world is on fire. we're seeing a surge in cash grabs that have absolutely zero soul behind them. creativity is constantly shoved to the side for a quick buck (hbo max flipping off their animators, ZA/UM booting the minds behind disco elysium who spent literal decades working on the game, the list could go on forever). create what you want and what you love, if someone tries to come @ you with rude feedback, that's cringe. 'you forgot to collect the homework' type energy. zero bitches. lame. zzzzzz.

all this to say . i want to encourage you to not feel burdened that you need to improve your writing PRONTO, because if that's hovering over you, it'll sap away your joy while writing. the thought alone makes me sad. there is no person on the planet who has experienced the exact set of circumstances that you have, meaning you have something to contribute that's entirely unique to you. you can describe things in ways people could never think to because they aren't you, you can infuse your distinct personality into your work, create something from nothing. you already have your own unique writing style; everyone does.

i'm sorry if this isn't coherent or useful, i just ended up getting heated HJTKEMG please keep writing anon!!! but remember that it's okay to take breaks when the negatives outweighs the positives during the writing experience. in fact, it's perfectly normal across the board for any hobby. i'm wishing you the best of luck.